Podiots - Podiots: Episode 84 - Nut Buster

Episode Date: August 24, 2021

Ben's getting comfortable, Peter sees it all on Street View, and Mikey brings new meaning to the term "acid test". Donate £3 or more to get a shoutout and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/podiotsdonations/ New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord:  http://bit.ly/VidiotsDiscord   Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickax. Maybe It's Mabelene is such an iconic piece of music. Hit the track. Everyone in the studio that I worked on this jingle with all had like childhood stories or memories. Yeah, we're around either watching these commercials on TV or sitting with our moms while they were doing their makeup, and it became really personal for us.

so guys i've started um a wrestling promotion oh i know we've all sort of experienced this vicariously before in a previous life yes yes but this one is is directly pertinent to our interests i feel and isn't done at the expense of like your employees or anything no no it's not god who would do that that would be awful God forbid, right? Yeah. So it's through Peter and I's main job. Is that correct? Is that correct, English, Peter and Eyes? Oh, I don't know. Peter and me's. Mine and Peter's main job, triple jump, and it's in a video game called Smackdown,

Here Comes the Pain. And I created a load of custom wrestlers, right? And I've set up a roster and started a campaign. And in the opening bout, it was Tiny Peter Austin versus Dave Benson Phillips. TP versus DPP who will win But unfortunately Tiny Peter Austin Unsuccess

Dave Benson Phillips Emerging victorious Well it's true to life I would say He is a wrestler He is for the best I feel like Dave's going to provide Sorry not to disparage your wrestling Peter But I feel like Dave's going to provide

A bit of sure throughout the rest of the The card Is that? No that's right That's good Yeah that's the vernacular Okay, gold star He is in a tag team

with Neil Buchanan Oh Wait I quickly run through who's in it I'm very curious now Let me let me pull up a photo And I'll talk you through Oh it's a brilliant photo Mikey Have you not seen this

No no I missed this I'll link you to the to the tweet Let's let's find it There's quite a few There's quite a few people in it Here we go There's grimace in there With these thick mucknuggles

Grimmis is in it He is in it It's an all star cast And Grimmis is one of the better made characters surprisingly. You think? You think he's all right? I was pretty impressed by Grimmis. Thank you. I really appreciate that.

Here you go, Mikey. That took me fucking ages. Wow. That, okay, just follow the list. Cheers Discord, yes. Nice one. Oh my fucking God. Simon Miller looks at Sporn. He doesn't he? He's just a bold man in a singlet.

What does that say about Simon Miller? We've got Dick Mycinko from at the top Billy Ray Walrus there's rules boss there he's got a question mark on his nose you can't really see it there's you've spotted Dave

in his tie-dye top Dave's very well done as well it actually looks a little bit like him you've got James Jenkins one of our editors there's me then there's Tiny Peter and there's Ashton

I like how you've done everyone like everyone looks pretty much spot on to their counter up counterparts but ben yours is that it's not great is it i like that you saw selfless that you put the most time in everyone else but yourself yeah i really didn't they're to be honest i didn't try really hard with any of these guys uh but then we've got brian butterfield obviously on the right there he is um we've got ivy who you won't be familiar with ivy don't you worry you with the spooky voice okay so that's her now you know the Fisher-Price car that we have

the pink and gold one right yeah well the Fisher Price car as it turns out uses she her pronouns and is a female member of the roster and that's her there lovely she looks simply magnificent she is she's actually quite scary to look at

but you can't most of her is obscured by other wrestlers she's very wide she's pretty wide quickly running through the rest we have sparkles Barbara's lady wife Hannah Montana Billy Ray Cyrus, Neil Boocake's there. Wow, what made, like, so, for people who are listening to this in a car, trying to imagine, just the most haunted depictions of all these people possible,

and it's scary than that. But what made Neil so buff? It's all that, all the big art attacks, I think. Yeah, just to carry around loads and loads of barrels of salt. Just everywhere it goes. So many, so many barrels of salt. Then you've got, you've got Polyrath. Palmusek there

Brian Bumpis who is legally different not the same guy as Brian Butterfield different man then there's Pichiti Dust Grimmis who's got nugs on his

tum tum and Simon Miller and that's the roster God what a line up that is impressive Neil looks like the guy out of that really violent video game hatred

I don't know that I'm familiar with that one it's like an infamous like school shooter simulate or a set. Oh, fuck, okay. That was not the intention.

I know he used to have longer hair, so that was the closest I could get. Just the sort of wispy fringe is what does it. Does Barbara Piss have orgy tattooed across her chest? No, it's forgive. Oh, of course. Forgive. It does look like orgy in that photo.

Apologies again to everyone just experiencing this through audio description for the blinds, because you can't see it. Pussing boots are ginger thoms, buys a spot of light on the floor and chases it. That was always the advert before the films for me, for the blind. But, yeah, I just wanted to give like a Dave update, a virtual Dave update. Good.

He can be seen over on Twitch.tv. Forge slash Team Triple Jump, cheeky plug. I'm going to add that to the thread if you haven't already. No, I haven't. Yeah, do you want, I don't know if I have a full photo of Dave himself, but the full showdown between Dave Benson Phillips and Tiny Peter Austin is available on our Vod's channel at Triple Jumps. I need to watch. This is a wrestling I'm going to want to watch. Yeah, me too.

I would actually watch this. A lot of people said that they've never been more invested. There was like a 20-minute match between Brian Butterfield and an actual real wrestler that Brian Butterfield won. And it was amazing. It was the most edge of your seat viewing you could possibly imagine. But there we are. That's it.

Amazing. Impressive work. Thank you, Ben. It's okay. Music time? Yeah, okay. Let's do it. Music time.

Hello everybody and welcome to Podiot's the official Vidiates podcast It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us where everybody brings A Thing Along to Talk About I'm Ben I'm Peter and I'm Michael Hello everyone

Body. How are we? I nearly said that like you normally say it, Mikey. You, you, you, Mike it. Mike it. You normally say, hello everybody. Hello everybody. Hello everybody. That's a, that's a Mikeyism. But, hi, how are you? Yeah, I'm feeling invigorating for a life after looking up, looking so intently at those faces. I looked at nothing but that image for five minutes while you went through. I'm really sorry. No, it's, it's good. I think it's, it's, it's improved me as a person. I'm going to take these fiercers, I'm going to have nightmares about them for years to come. Okay, well, that's good. Yeah. I mean, that was the intention after all. Peter, how are you?

I am very well, thank you. How are you, Ben? Yeah, I'm okay. I got my second jab today, which I think makes me invulnerable to all ailments. Yeah. And that's good, feeling pretty powerful today. Got a dead arm. I haven't entered the risky, like, sleep time.

Mode? Only because of the awkward pause, not because of just the words I haven't. But when you said, I've got a dead arm, I haven't, and then paused awkwardly. Oh, no. I just, I thought you were going somewhere else with that. Where did you think, go on, help to share it with the class. Go on, Peter. Sit, yep.

I haven't given, I believe, I believe the technical term, the urban dictionary term, is a stranger. I haven't given myself a stranger. Oh, but, uh, a stranger. Yeah. Well, that's where you get the vaccine and the non-dominantan tam, right? Yeah. What, to avoid temptation? To avoid that, you know, the devil's tickle?

Yeah, eat some Kellogg's as well for breakfast. Yeah. Is it Kellogg's or Quakers Oat? Or is it the same? Are they just kind of the same? I think it's corn flakes, isn't it? Yeah, a food so plain. Oh, yeah, that was it, yeah.

Corn flakes. Conflakes were like, yeah, that'll stop them. We should, one of us should do that as a thing at some point. I think we have done. Have we? I'm pretty sure. Yeah, someone's done it, isn't it? I'm humiliating.

Well, if you want to help us pay for our education, or my education, I should clarify, so that I do know more about what we have and haven't covered on Poddiots, why not consider contributing to the cause and supporting us financially? You can do that. It is possible. If you go to Streamlabs.com forward slash Podiates, donations, donate three pounds or more to get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the end of. the show will love you forever and you'll really really help us out and keep bringing you what

and help us to keep bringing you the amazing poddiet's content that you love also very very much mikey has the first batch for us we begin with billy ray and the clonosaurus stop turgling my gurgberg shrek the musical mr black donac o seven poddiet's made me crash my car. Is this another potty accent that's happened? I think that maybe that's the same guy who did crash his car while laughing at. Immediately, I don't know if we've spoken about this, but he did incriminate himself by saying

that he laughed so hard that he crashed. So I don't know if he was making any kind of insurance claim. It's definitely your fault. But he did publicly state it was his fault, yeah. Oops. Oh, well, hopefully the insurers aren't listening or following us on Twitter. Fingers cross.

Al-coholic. Kermit. The Pog Mahone. Shit, I forgot to use Camel Cayus. I forgot through. You still battled through. Alan Claw. Keithsus Cheggsaw Massaquin. Wow.

The Keithsus Cheggsaw Massaquin. Oh, lovely. Check out my naked jungle. Stoakilicious. The generous, anyway, here's Roland. And they say, I've watched and listened to you guys since the beginning of Vidiates.

2018 was a difficult year for me and having your videos to look forward to help me through the year. Keep up the great, funny content and Peter... Oh, fuck. Se cozy bello and alto. That was pretty good accent.

I don't know what that is. Maybe it means you're very gross. Probably you're very tall, maybe. Dipper's gross. Alto. So that's probably something to do with size, I would have thought. Yeah.

It's also a singing voice range. I don't know, maybe it's Italian. Oh, you are so beautiful and tall. Oh, beautiful. Oh, yeah, bellow. That's nice. That's very nice. Thank you, Roland. Fantastic. Roland, thank you so much. Thank you.

We appreciate it. Specky, Becky. Trunters coming with us. Fox woves you. Oh, fuck him out. Please. In the tiny troupe this week slash fortnight is Stephen Skoda's pro-trainer, gooey books butoon

No donation from Fwed Weber Lord Cheggers Esquire Lord Brothovich Two lords, wow A pair of lines there Cheggers party knob The very generous Okaru 127

Who said Hey guys, I've been a long time fan I'm finally getting around to joining Pod Squad I'm a woodworker And my favourite time to enjoy some podiots is when I can get out into the shop And get some work done Thanks so much for the wonderful content

Oh, well that's nice Okaru Or possibly Osaru It's a C, Okaru Because we were talking When we last time about How we, I think all three of us Or two of us would think that woodwork Seems quite therapeutic

So a dream You can give us a masterclass Love to do a woodwork Do you want to come like do a podcast And we'll do woodworking for a day We'll have like a job swap While we wreck your shop You can do all three hosts

Yeah and we'll just destroy your livelihood The list continues with a super generous donation from Terry Whiz who says, Love you boys, been around since the name redacted days. I thought I'd give you money, but I'm terrible at remembering to do this.

Consider this back pay. Keep up the silly work. Well, thank you very much, Terry Wiss, for much, much generosity. Thank you, Terry Wizz. The list continues to continue with Mikey watched Shrek, he like it. I got crumbs in my pubs again.

Oh dear. Bamble, fumble, namble, dandble, the very generous Liz Fern, who said, Hey, guys, finally had the money to donate, so I just wanted to let Ben know as a fellow DMU graduate that still lives in Leicester,

Maryland is still ruining people's lives and bowels every day. They must be stopped. No, they mustn't. Thank you, Liz Fern. Thank you so much. And I'm so sorry that you went to DMU. I hope you're okay.

Commiserations. a couple more we've got two in the pink one in the stink lovely what does that mean can you explain that I'm not sure

something about something about tossing yourself off with a numb hand I don't know God's tickle what it's

is it something to do two in two like two stroking billy row wallers to stroke in the pink walrus yeah

and the stink is the psycho seagull's mess that was left behind right yeah that sounds really complicated

I don't know what one would get out of that You'd have to place Billy quite near the mess in order to reach. It's quite a, quite a mayhem to put together, but it's worth it for just the experience, I guess. Oh, okay. Last three from me, we've got Peter Stole My Spiro Porn. I did.

I won't give it back. Caroline, come back, I forgive you. And Lori Wales, ye, Bob. I'm very invested in this Caroline soap opera that's happening. God squad. Yeah, Caroline, please take him back. Or her. He can change.

They can change. They can change. Yeah. We've also got Canada Communist Candy Party, head chog, Chairman Mauam. I do actually enjoy that one. I didn't get it immediately. Chairman Maoam or head chog.

Chairman Maoam. Leon Gumdropski. Fredo Rick Engels. Oh, I like. that one. Carl Marks Bar. Series of good ones. Peter's bed socks.

Ben saying beans. Stephen and Olive are cats. The very generous Mr. Macca who said, Hey, boys, just wanted to say thank you for being such great lads and making such entertaining and hilarious content over the years. By the way, on the subject of chocolate bars, I just discovered Cadbury's star bars, and they may just be the end of me.

So good. Oh, what the hell's a star bar? Are they the ones that are a bit like, a boost or is that just boost? Yeah, it looks boosty, but the marketing line for them is amazing. Delicious Cadbury milk chocolate surrounding a chewy cosmos of golden caramel. Wow. It sounds expensive.

I want one of those. Mr. Macca, send us some. No, you've already done enough. Thank you very much for your donation. Prince Beefcakes. Cunt Eastwood. That's probably the stupidest one we've ever had. So well, though.

Just keep swimming, Ash. Dick in the bumgillow. Ben Potter's filth squad, Dick and Femidom, Jane Austen is Peter's mum, Cheggers jinkle jammed in a door, Maly's airborne broth, I Wondder Biggar Dyke, Deek. I wonder Biggard Deek.

I mean, it's clearly intending to say I want a bigger dick, but it's... Oh, I see. It's not been... It's not even very well done. It's not very tricky because I can see it right there. This is not even broken up. Anyway, thank you. Must try harder.

Thank you. Yeah, you got to wake up pretty early to trick us. And dogging in Peter's tiny car. And that is your pod squad for this week. Thank you so much. I've heard dogging so many times today. Good God. Why?

Maybe you should stop dogging then. No, but I like it. It gets me out of the house. Yeah, it's the reason you've heard it. because lots of people have walked past your car saying, excuse me, can you stop dogging, please? I've been accused of being a doggard before, so, I mean, it wouldn't surprise me.

Have you really? Is there much of a backstory to that? It was just saying we were doing a student film, and so we drove out to this quiet country lane, like three cars filled with people. Yeah, and we just kind of parked up on the side, and then the landowner came up, and he was like, you doggers?

We just looked at him like, no. Because we'll get a lot of doggers around here. No, promise, we're not dog. Look, we've got a camera with us. Oh, God. My dad was once accused of dogging, but not even in the true sense of the word. He was walking our dog.

And I think it was off its lead at one point. It was like way out in the country just to cross a field. And then when it crossed the field, he put it back on the lead. And the landowner came out and was like, excuse me, excuse me, what's that you're doing? He was like, oh, sorry, what, what do you mean? And he said, I saw you, I saw you in there. And he was like, what?

Yeah, it's a public right of way. He said, I saw you dogging, dogging across my field. And apparently it just, that man thought that dogging means walking a dog. Oh, no. Oh, I wonder how many people he said that to. Yeah, I know. Oh, my God.

Have you heard, there have been a couple of instances where I've heard people talk about knowing someone who uses Buster Nut incorrectly. Oh, no. Like, when they're, when they're just like, I'm so cross, I'm going to bust a nut. And the prevailing advice is you must never correct this person ever. They must continue to incorrectly say, bust a nut. That's also just a cavalcade of shame of all the times they've said that.

Yeah. So it's just, ignorance is bliss. If you don't wash the dishes, I'm going to bust a nut. Okay, ma'am, sorry. God. It's wonderful to meet you, Your Majesty. We've been working really hard to get the first. place ready for you i nearly busted a nut yeah i've been busting a nut getting this place ready for you

to get the walls painted oh no that's um we have a christmas you you bust a nut with a nutcracker don't you do you do yeah nut busters out anyway uh streamlabs.com forward slash poddiots donation three pounds or more to join pod squad thank you so much to pod squad this week peter is question man or woman a woman uh i've got some questions here from the people at home Now, of course, the three of us have never spoken to each other before. We're just getting to know each other. We're very awkward.

I don't really feel comfortable around you. So thankfully, Samuel at SB Music 98 on Twitter, has said, What's your go-to joke for an icebreaker? Oh, man. Oh, wow, Jesus. I've got a couple of answers to this. One of them is an anecdote, which is that I was once in a, I think it was our first seminar.

at uni and um before we started doing uh you know discussing academic stuff um with each other despite the fact we'd never met each other the person who was running it was like why don't we just you know go around and um just like introduce ourselves and stuff and say where we've come from whatever and the circle was going around and we got to this guy and instead of saying hello my name is, and I'm from this place. The first thing he did before he got to that was, oh, do you guys, can I tell you guys a joke? And we're like, oh, yeah, yeah, go for it. And it's still a bit awkward. And he goes, how much does a polar bear way? And there's a bit of a pause. And he went, enough to break the ice. And everyone, everyone went, ah, ha, ha. And

you know, Dave was there. But there's something about that joke. I think he told it in the wrong moment because everyone else had just gone around and said their name. So, you know, he could have just done that. But I think I've used that joke once before, or since then, because not only is it a joke, which inherently can just be an icebreaker, whether it's about breaking ice or not, but because the punchline is also about breaking the ice, it's like it's got an extra layer to it where everyone in the room can go, ah yes, we all know that we all felt very uncomfortable and British in this situation and now we don't. Ha ha ha ha.

So it's kind of a multi-purpose one there. But I've I mean I've got I've got a short joke and a long joke that are my kind of go-to ones. I don't know if they're necessarily my icebreaker ones but just if someone said

tell me a joke. I just pretend. You're at a cousin's wedding. I rock up. I'm a distant relative. Distant relative. You never met each other before. Like how did you choose a name? We've got no common grounds.

Oh, hey, Peter, yeah? Yeah, hi. Hey, how are you? I'm okay. Do you want to hear a joke? Oh, yeah, I love jokes, yeah. What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.

I mean, that's the perfect joke for me, so yeah. Big thumbs up. Dave was also there at the party. When do you go from there? Watching it across the table. He's not involved in the conversation, but he just overhears the joke. Just a very distant.

He's just snacking on some canapes in the corner. Yeah. Oh my God. I'm a fan of that. That's good. That's silly. Have you guys got Icebreaker jokes? I'm a mess.

To be honest. You're a mess. You're a mess. I'm a mess. I feel like the first, like, well, even people I know a lot. Like, just, I stumble over words a lot. I just kind of, like, vomit on people with really bad, not bad words, just words. And it's just like, I can't stop because if there's silence, that means it's bad.

It needs filling. Yeah. And I don't have go-to icebreakers, because every time it's different. And the other day, I like left the house and there was someone knocking on my neighbor's door, like, pass. I was like, hey, you're right. And like, yeah, I'm playing post-person today. I was like, oh, yeah, I think you've got a promising career and that. Like, hey, yeah.

And I was like, you make a promising post-operative. And then just silence for a couple seconds. Bye. Just carried on. I just, what does post-operative even mean, Michael? Why do you do this? Why do you just say words? Wow.

And I never saw that person again. I'm quite glad. They didn't deserve you, Michael, quite frankly. No. But, I mean, I don't know if anyone necessarily has. apart from that guy from my seminar, I don't think anyone has a go-to, ice-breaker joke as such.

But if someone said to you, Mikey, tell me a joke, do you have an answer for that, at least? Do you have a joke? Oh, my God. A go-to joke. I don't. I heard a good one earlier. Yeah.

What's a, what's, I was going to repeat the carrot joke, but I totally forgot. You can't remember it. Wow, are you a goldfish? I genuinely am. It's just like I say something, and it just disappears, or someone else says something, disappears.

What's wrong? Lillith, what's wrong with me? And then this is this. You see what I mean? I'm like, I'm panicking and I'm just keep saying things. Ben can fill the silence with his joke. Yeah. I kind of rather just let it linger and just sort of stare at you.

Oh, God. I feel sick. And then very quietly, just echoing from the other side of the room. Ah, ha, ha, ha. Cheers, Dave. Thanks, Dave. If you ever see me in public. please don't, I mean, talk to me, but just be prepared from just absolutely nonsense to be spewed you.

Firm handshake, maintain eye contact. Ah, ha ha, ha, right to his face. At my wedding, Mikey, I'm going to separate you from the table with Claudia, Ben, all the Yogscast people who I'm inviting, and I'm just going to put you with, like, my uncles and grandmas, and you'll have to just... That'd be a good conversation, though, I think. Tell the carrot joke over and over again. Oh, God. That would be quite fun. I'd love to see what.

happen there but it's your special day and I don't want everyone to leave the day wholly uncomfortable please let me sit with the people I know I will I will thank you oh dear I don't have an icebreaker joke but I do have a go-to joke yeah which I won't just because I feel like the situation where you try to fill the silence with a joke that really doesn't happen it's like that's a sitcom scenario that doesn't happen to real people I don't think. At least it hasn't happened to me. But when we're, I don't know, doing hashtag content or, you know, work stuff and I need to just come up with a joke. I always go to the same well every time. We might have heard it then. You've definitely heard it. And that's what did the sand say,

what did the sea say to the sand? Oh yeah. Nothing. It just waved. It's good. That's it. That's the joke. That is the joke. That is the joke I go to over and over again. And for some reason, since I was in primary school, I've had committed to memory, despite the fact that I never tell it anymore, an obscenely rude joke that's really long and has all sorts of twists and turns and it really keeps you guessing until you drop the payload at the end. And for some reason, it's just stuck with me. Until you bust a nut. Like I'm fixing to bust a nut, really keeping it in. But yeah. Do you like rehearse it in your head or is it just like, is it just committed there I can just tell it.

Like, it just, it just comes out. Wow. I just bust that nut. God, I kind of want to know what it is now. Yeah. I mean, I could tell it. It's not, it's just rude. Like, it's not, it's not offensive, I don't think.

Well, I was about to say, I've got a rudish joke, which is one of my other go-to ones, which is slightly longer. And I've realized it's also parrot-related. Yes. Oh, wow. Okay. But you tell us yours. I'm just giving you.

I'm telling you that I'm about to tell a rude joke, so don't you feel bad about telling yours? Okay, here we go. I hope you are as impressed as I am that I've managed to remember this for so long. So there's a little boy, and he hears his mum and his dad arguing, and the dad calls the mum a bitch,

and the mum calls the dad a bastard. They're like, they're fighting. You know, they're just being nasty to each other. And the little boy says, what do those words mean? And the mum says, oh, you know, bastardsards, it's just, it just means, it just means dad

and dad says the same for mum basically and then a bit later on dad's upstairs shaving and he cuts himself shaving and he goes shit and the little boy over here's this could be a little girl as well

I don't know why I've gendered the child but I have heard this joke but I don't remember where it's going I'm sure I've heard this before so he cuts himself and he goes shit and the little boy hears and it's oh what does what does shit mean He's like, oh, no, it's just a word for shaving.

I'm just shaving. I'm like, okay. And then his mom is stuffing the turkey, but I think she also cuts herself. There's all sorts of injuries involved in this house. This house sounds chaotic. It cuts herself on the turkey somehow. This child to be, yeah, just a really sharp bone. And she's like, oh, fuck.

Or fucking hell or something like that. It becomes relevant at the end. And the little boy says, oh, what does that mean? she said oh it just it's i just mean it's stuffing i'm stuffing the turkey that's that's what it means i'm stuffing okay um and then i'm just remembering where this joke goes and i'm trying to decide whether to abandon it uh i'm gonna go through with it you boys can decide whether or not it should stay in listener discretion advised if it has even remained in okay it's not i still i don't think it's offensive it's just childishly rude it's the kind of joke you would tell us that's fine

That's fine. Then the little boy, he finds a condom. It's not used to be very clear. Just a condom. Okay, good, good. He's like, what's this? And the parents are like, oh, no, it's just, it's a coat. It's just, it's a coat.

That's where it's a coat. Don't worry about that. It's just a coat. Perhaps this is where my memory is fading a bit regarding the joke. You know, they're talking about a condom. He's like, what's a condom? It's like, oh, it's just another word for a kid. Yeah, yeah.

Anyway, then the guests arrive for dinner. There are guests, by the way. Guests are arriving. The little boy opens the door and he says, Hello, bitch and bastard. May I take your condoms? Dad's upstairs shitting and mum's downstairs fucking the turkey. Fantastic.

And that's the joke. That's the really long, stupid, childish joke that I've remembered since I was 10 years old. That's fantastic. Wow, that's it. I mean, yeah, it's just, yeah, I enjoyed that. It's bad. It's not good.

but I've remembered it for a very long time, and I don't know why. It's very good. Hopefully that's silly forever. That's one to tell the grandkids. Yeah. You can pass it down and go through generation. Is it one to tell the grandkids? Not your own kids.

Peter, what's your rude? I might have even told this to you guys, if not even potentially on the podcast, I feel like. But I don't know. I'll tell it anyway. So there's a man who is concerned that his wife may be having an effect. fair um because he's sort of there are various things that have made him suspicious but he goes out all day during the day and i'm sure she does too sometimes you know sure they're both holding down jobs but this is a joke that's maybe 20 years old when minds weren't as open sadly uh but anyway

that's the situation and he decides oh yeah i don't want to like i don't like bug the room Because, you know, if I'm wrong and she finds out and, oh, I don't, how am I going to do this? How am I going to know if something's going on? And he realizes, I know what I could do. I could get a parrot that can talk. And then when I come home at the end of the day, I can just ask the parrot what's gone on while I've been out. So he does that. He goes to the pet shop and he says, I need a parrot that can speak really well.

And the pet shop owner says, I've got one that is like perfect. Like, it can speak, you know, every word in the English language. It can recite Shakespeare. There's only one problem, and I give you some discount. It's got no legs. And the man says, how does it hold on to its perch if it's got no legs? And the Petropona says, well, he holds on with its penis. Just curls its penis round the bar.

It's fine. All right, fine, I'll take it, as long as it can talk. So he takes the parrot home, and he puts it on a perch in the living room. And he says, right, I'm off out to work now. but just keep an eye out and keep an eye out on what's going on and report back to me

at the end of the day. The power is like, yeah, no worries, have a good day. So the mind gets home from work at the end of the day and the parrot is lying on the bottom of its cage on its back.

And he goes, what, are you okay? What happened? And he said, you were right, you were right to be concerned, you know, not long after you've gone out, the milkman came round and she opened the door for him. And the man says,

oh yeah, then what happened? And he says, well, then the milkman started coming in and they went over to the sofa and the man says well then what happened? And he said well they started kissing and rubbing hands on each other and oh it was

really getting quite and the man says yeah then what happened? He said they took each other's clothes off and your wife was all naked and the milkman was naked and oh they were all over the sofa and he says then what happened and the parrot says I don't know I got too excited and I fell off my purse

oh for fuck sake That is really silly. Horrible image. Good God. Oh, wow. I'm imagining this parrot speaking like the parrot off of Aladdin.

Yeah, Iago. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Christ. Well, now that we've lost all our listeners, we're with our extremely offensive jokes. Shall we do a thing? Yeah, maybe we should.

he's got a thing I've got a thing I've got a thing go for it here we here we go I want to thank Connor Bennett

for bringing this news story this very important news story to our attention at C Bennett underscore 12 on Twittles

that's what it's called and it's from the Irish Examiner and the headline reads new pictures show Wally the Walrus relaxing on a small boat in Crookhaven

Would you like to see him? I'd love to see it. Yes, please, absolutely. Here is Wally. Hopefully Discord will do. There he is. Wow. What a boy.

Her name is Rio and she does. He looks like he's on his way to get. He's off to Monaco. Yeah, exactly. So that's Wally. The subtitle, though, is actually the true thrust. of this article. Wally the walrus is set to get a floating

couch in an effort to prevent him from sinking more boats. Oh, lovely. So Wally, Wally is too big despite how brilliantly he fits in that presumably several person boat. He is too big and he keeps sinking boats.

For context, as I'm sure the article will say, this is the walrus that's been hanging around British shores over the past few months, right? And Irish. I will, I'll send you his, quote unquote, floating sofa as well, and then I'll read the article. Oh, wow. Oh, that is incredible.

It's an actual sofa. So Billy's best mate, Wally, here we go. Wally the Walrus continues to draw a crowd as new pictures posted to social media appears to show him relaxing in Crookhaven. The images show the 800-kilogram male walrus, chilling out in a small pleasure craft in the harbor, enjoying the size. of West Cork. On Tuesday, the Irish examiner reported that Wally is set to get a floating couch in an effort to prevent him from sinking more boats. The Arctic walrus, who was first spotted off Kerry last March,

has spent the last two weeks cruising and feeding along the south-east and southern coast. The juvenile... He's a juvenile walrus and he's that big. Whoa, he's a babby walrus. Has left a trail of destruction in his wake after hauling himself onto several small boats to rest, causing thousands of euro worth of damage and sinking at least two.

Warrishes, warruses like seals and sea lions are pinnipeds, or semi-aquatic, which means they must come up on land or onto a floating object to rest. His ponchon for lounging on boats prompted an appeal from Seal Rescue Ireland, SRI, for the donation of an unused rib or a large pontoon that could be used as a designated hallout site for him to rest. So whenever they spot him, basically the alarm. Alarm goes, and they rush his sofa to roughly his coordinates and hope that he settles on that instead of a boat. Imagine the fear of the people who have the boats in that arena. They're probably got a WhatsApp group.

Oh shit. Wally's here. Amber alert. Wally. Get the couch. Push it out. SRA executive director, Melanie Crose. I'm going to butcher some Irish names, and I'm really sorry.

It said they have also been liaison. with British divers marine life rescue BDMLR in the UK who helped install a floating pontoon for Wally during his six-week stint in the Isle of Silly, which makes it sound like he's just been on holiday, really, in July on how best to respond. Ms. Kroath said SRI has now secured a sturdy pontoon with three raised sides, which looks like a floating couch.

It is ready to be deployed quickly if there are more sightings of Wally in busy harbour areas over the coming days. A boat owner who lost his... vessel to Wally last week, used towels to gather the animals scent. Hang on, what? Use towels to gather the animals sent before the boat sank. Oh, these towels have now been used to scent the pontoon in the hope of encouraging Wally to use it when or if it is deployed. Is used towels to gather the animals sent a sort of epithet for he soaked up the piss or something? That could be it, or maybe he did boost a newt.

Yeah But so he's His boat is sinking in front of him And like He's like got to get the piss Yeah got to get the towels Gotta get this big lad's piss Get it

As good as good as the story and photo is Of Wally having a sofa I cannot get over the fact The other picture Just looks like he owns a boat And is passing by It's Wally's boat On the back it says Wally's boat

Fantastic Yeah, anyway It continues And while this potential response Would require close liaison With the Coast Guard Local authorities Wildlife Marine or Port authorities

Miss Crose says They have also secured the use of a disused Rib which is more easily transported And installed SRI's responsible depend on where and when Wally is next sighted She said We have never done this before

So there are lots of learnings as we go We're getting assistance from BDML are and we are working with Orca, Ireland, and the West Cork Animal Welfare Group. But things have gone quiet over the weekend. So we think, and this is my favourite bit, he's flying below the radar, which is good for now. So there we are. Wally has just been causing havoc. If you happen to spot Wally, I don't know if we have any listeners in that area of the world,

but call the SRIs 247 our hotline on 087-195-3-393 to report a Wally sighting. Where's Wally is what they should have put in. Where's Wally? Yeah, what the hell? Come on. There we are. It's such a British slash Irish slash kind of European thing where you know, there are places in the world where you have real issues with forest fires or like

snow like shuts down the entire country because it's like 12 feet deep or those animals that want to kill you. You can't go swimming because of the Great Whites. up here, our walrus appears and it is absolute carnage because of a single walrus who is just, we're just not prepared for it. We don't know

what to do about it, you know? I love it. All the emergency responses have mobilized. The community effort, we must build this walrus a couch. It's, is that, I don't, I mean, I guess it's better than him just constantly going to other boats, but is

that just giving him a reason to stay in the area? I mean, maybe he's, maybe he could become like a wishing well everyone throws coins at him oh god no no no leave wally do not throw coins at

Wally please don't do not approve that message but there we are that's my thing and I pray that we get more

Wally News very soon yeah let's keep Wally Watch going big fan we've got a question here from Shana at Strange Penny 12 we know that one

we know that one I hope you well Shana Shana says which Pokemon would you eat for a starter main and dessert

I'm going to have to pull up a picture of I'm just going to choose the original 151 because I don't even want to think about the others okay I could rattle mine off right now if I want to get super basic about it and just sort of try and equate Pokemon to their real life

inspirations Taurus is surely one Taurus is the main course yeah and that's a bull have that for lunch And then start a, maybe an oddish, some greens, you know. Yeah, yeah. And then for dessert, probably that fucking ice cream Pokemon that they've made now, which is stupid. Yeah.

There we are. Easy. Easy. I wouldn't mind for a starter. What's the crab one called? Craby? Craby. Yeah.

You could have some nice crabby patte or something. Oh, crabby patte just sounds like an upmarket sponge bob menu. Yeah, it's delicious. The secret recipe to the crabby patte. Secret crabby patte formula. I'd have ditto for dessert. Oh, I was thinking, yeah, a big ball of jelly.

Quite tasty, yeah. And then for the main, I don't know, I mean, obviously Taurus is a good shout, but I'm trying to think of something different. Maybe, what if I felt like a size. duck. Hoysen crispy

side duck I would have in pancakes. Oh, very good. Yeah. That'd be nice. I think to start I'm not going to eat far-fetched,

but he comes a far-fetched just to steal his leak. Yeah, I'm just going to steal his leak and send him on his way. Steal, Q-Bones bone, just get a broth going. Yeah.

Baby, you've got a stew going. Oh, baby. I think, hmm, how poisonous are these like poisonous mushroom Pokemon's Pokemon's

Pokemon's Pokemon? You can just go to the Pokemon Centre seemingly

there is no death apart from when there is death conveniently yeah in the lavender

town I'll I'll take a lovely I have a mushroom vile plume for my main

yeah I'll tell you what oh I'm fancying what else what is take what is grimer

that's just sludge you don't want that Yeah, that's, what do you call it, gruel, I think. Yeah, I think it's like the, at the end of the day, they scrape down all the grills. Yeah. And then, they serve that the next day. You don't want that.

You don't want that. You do want that. Oh, yum, yum. Give me a grimer. Oh, man, okay. Why not just have mug at that point? Yeah. That's what he evolves into, the bigger grimer.

Oh, the crab Pokemon is literally called crabby. I thought that was a joke. Nope. No, it's called crabby. Nope. That's it. I could have chose cloister. Wow, I really execute.

I could have had eggs. It was execute. Yeah, I was going to say that's an obvious one that we all missed. Sorry. Really, really. I chose the shit end of this. I panicked and just went for literal grime and gruel. Just chopped the bulb off a bulbosol.

That's probably pretty good. Tangela, it's bloody, it's spaghetti. Oh, Tangela, yeah, yeah, just spaghetti. Yeah, yeah. What about a nice Voltorb gobstopper for dessert? Oh, yeah. It does have a tendency to only know the move self-destruct, though, so just be aware. The never-lasting gobstop, it'll be.

Yes. You only ever need one. Yeah, that's true. That's true. There are actually a fair few Pokemon that are based on edible animals. I mean, I guess most animals are edible, but, you know, ones that are typically eaten. I mean, there's pidgy. Some people eat pigeons.

Yeah, that's true. There's, you know, if you fish, there's Magikarp and, you know, the like. Could Diglitt theoretically be a potato or is it another kind of vegetable? Yeah, it could be. But we don't know what's on the other end of it. That's the problem. We don't. Yeah.

Wow, I've never looked at, having all the Pokemon in front of me is a wild experience. I've never looked at them this intently, but what a collection of lads and lasses. Mm-hmm. Yeah, they're looking good. could have a nice bit of um squid if you if you fancy it um i can't remember their names the two squiddy ones tentacle yeah tentacle and tent to crawl yeah um yeah lots to choose from much to think about much to think about i think even mew looks quite tasty as maybe a dessert like a sort of gummy mew or something i'd eat a little pink by the size there's only one but i'd eat it yeah it's like the

one in the Simpsons, the special gummy. Vino de Milo, is that it? Yeah, that one. Sorry, I just googled Pokemon Food. What the fuck is. Sorry, Ben, I just heard that noise you made for Vino de Milo. Oh, Bella.

Oh. What have you found, Mikey? Sorry, Mikey. I just Google Pokemon Food, and there's a horrifying image. I'll not describe it until I've read the headline. Pokemon fans appalled as Food Network posts explicit image of

Pikachu being stuffed. Oh. Oh, God, okay. It's exactly... He is enjoying that, question mark? It's... Audio description. It's like a paper-mache-looking Pikachu on his back screaming with his hands up,

while a man quite delicate... Well, two people, it looks like, actually. Insert a rod up his... His... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... his... he's... he's... Whoa, the finished product is so good Hold on Hold on, it gets better Oh wow

So you say this is the food network Is this edible? Is this food? What's he made out? For more context So the first part of the image is him being stuffed And then the final result is him like Screaming with anger

Being held up by some kind of contraption Of yellow PVC pipe it looks like Which has been up his bum for stability, and on the end of his hands, it's just, it looks like little bits of dynamite sparkling. I mean, I'd be inclined to add those to the thread so people know what we're talking about. Yeah, we have to. I'll do that. Wow. They've got to see it. Wow. Wonderful. What, is that cake? That must be cake. It might be cake, I guess, but geez. It does look like Papier-Mashe. Bent hula hoop that's not round anymore. Why is he sat in that? It's all angrily.

I've, well, whatever show this is, I need to watch it now. Yeah. This week's episode of the Food Network Challenge. That's why it's called. How traumatized can we make children this week? Would you like to hear my thing? I would love to. Please, before I continue to talk about this, this poor, poor Pikachu.

You may have heard about this. I was shocked and appalled. Google Street View for Loch Ness brings up man's X-rated photo Oh, oh dear When Google Maps users went in search of Nessie The Loch Ness Monster This certainly wasn't what they had in mind

This is according to Ladd Bible Who incidentally, I've just realised Maybe I should have found a different write-up Because I kind of don't want to support Ladd Bible Given they doxed Paul Chuckel Do you know about this? It was mental No, I didn't know

They reposted a video Admittedly it was someone else else's video but lad bible reposted it to a much wider audience of someone and paying the guy for the video and paid the guy for it calling up paul chuckle on their phone i don't know if like maybe paul chuckle rang some kind of service or goods business and they some and that's how they got his number but um it just they were holding up their phone facetiming paul chuckle and while it was ringing it just had his mobile number on the screen and that went out on lad bible and paul chuckle had to change his number because he said he'd been getting phone calls and stuff and he was really old

that's not no yeah he was like don't know who shared my number but you know very cross about it or something fucking lad bible but anyways too late i'm going to have to read this now but hey don't don't go looking for this article read it somewhere else fuck lad bible yeah um an x-rated photo of a naked man appearing in street view has got twitter users tittering A man from London has got people in hysterics after making a shocking discovery on Google Maps. He went searching for Nessy, the mythical monster, which is said to live at the bottom of Loch Ness in Scotland, sorry, Loch Ness. But instead, was greeted by a photo of a man leaving nothing to the imagination. Taking to Twitter to share what he'd found, he explained that if you search for Loch Ness in Google Maps, then switch to Street View, there's a surprise in store.

He posted to Twitter and said, public announcement. Search Loch Ness in Google Maps and click on the street view. I apologize in advance. I'm now going to send the very censored image to you guys in Discord. We're probably not adding this one. Oh, wow. What the fuck. It's full frontal nudity, waist down.

What? That image has been double censored and they've covered it up with a white bar and then also blurred the whole thing. But they haven't blurred his nipples, which is disgusting. revolting the male nipple hide it um so uh the article look at any more peter make it go the article doesn't go in to some extra detail that i found out by looking around the hashtag um or like the trend when this was trending okay so this just talks about like you know this image is on there and people on twitter were disgusted if that's wish if that's nessy i would wish we'd never found him replied one person disgusting what a flipping disgrace uh which one

he has put a naked photo on google her disgusting very pissed off yeah um so i found two tweets um on the trend from spenge blob at spenge underscore blob who said i did some investigative journalism and i found that he gets off on posting his nudes to popular attractions on Google such as Disney World and an all-girls Japanese high school. Oh my God, I forgot about that bit. That's horrible.

He gets turned on by the high view counts of the photos. And there's another example of him holding a selfie stick and posing naked somewhere. Oh, at a Victoria's Secret. What a tyrant. God. God.

And the second tweet from Spenge Blob. It says he also keeps a map and a total view count. And there's a screenshot of what looks like it might be a Reddit post saying a map of the places I posted naked photos on Google Maps.

And then at the top it just says where I post naked photos and then there's a load of pins all over the world. And then at the bottom it says 36,018,199 total Google views. Good. That's fucked up.

It's really fucked up because, you know, people... Yes, okay, the internet sometimes has nudes on it and nudity, but, you know, maybe just let people choose if that's what they want to go looking for on, you know, perhaps a relevant website. It's not for this man to decide when we get to see, or more to the point, have to see, a naked will... I'm just going to send the pictures to you or what I'll do is I'll just send a tweet to you

because it's easier. What an absolutely monster. Jesus Christ. I can't believe they've gotten through. Surely with all of the bullshit and hopes that we have to jump through on YouTube, they would have some sort of AI screening to like know if there was a lot of flesh in a photo, you know?

I've sent you a tweet. Oh wow, yeah, there he is. A link to his tweet. So does he take, that photo looks like he's taken a naked photo of himself at the attraction? Is that just photoshopped in for the purpose of the story? I don't think they're all taken at the attractions, because if you scroll down, so there's a reply to that first tweet, which is Spenge Blob's second tweet, which shows his map. and he's got photos all over the world of, you know, pictures of being naked.

Like there's one on Madagascar, one in the middle of Australia, one in the middle of Russia. So I'm guessing he doesn't go to the places, which surely even that, even putting aside the fact that people can abuse this system and put nudes on Google Maps,

surely Google, you would think that they would require to be some location data on your photo? Like, I could just take, I could draw the Angel of the North, on a B-a-MAT, take a photo of it and add it to Street View on Google Maps at the Angel of the North, if I've one of those 360 cameras.

Like, why are they not checking this thing? Right, it's time to abuse the system. Let's upload a photo of Dave Benson-Philips at somewhere. You ready for this? At somewhere. Yeah. Should we all do it? She'll choose a place.

Yeah, I'm going to go for Angel of the North because I think that's a good shout. He is the angel of them. He is our angel of the north. Angel of the North. So how do we do this? Right, I'm at Angel of the North. I'm just going to add the... Is it just add a photo?

The map of the man's nudes to the thread. I'm not going to add any of the nude photos, but you guys won't struggle to find them at home. If indeed you want to see them. However, if you do search for the angel of the north, I'm going to add the ball pit photo of Dave Benson Phillips. Let's save image. I'm going to choose a good and if I'm going to do it.

I've selected a company called Just Vans in Frome. That is way too easy to share a photo. What? Yeah, I think I've just done it. Yeah, you just literally drag and drop a photo and it's like, cool, it'll be there soon. Wow, that's mental. Anyway, yeah, I've just chose Just Vans, a business in Frome, and I've uploaded the picture of Dave next to his van.

It's fantastic. There's a lot of photos of the Angel of the North I'm doing a lot of scrolling but I'm just waiting for Dave and his ball pit hang on, still scrolling God there's a lot of photos I just want to make sure

There it is, it's there, it's already there Wow, what the hell that's so easy Yeah, Dave's already on the, Jesus That's fucking bonkers That's absurdly easy I'm about to add Dave holding a bucket of gunge to Buckingham Palace

because he is our king I think I've picked a landmark that is too popular for photos I'm I'm scrolling Oh yeah mine might be the same Still scrolling to get to the bottom of these photos I've gone the opposite way I've attacked a small business

Yeah you have There is There is he's not even near the bottom I'll take a screenshot Okay So how do I How do this This is

This is fucking ridiculous How broken this is Right, here we go Why don't we have like A comp, oh we should have made it as a competition See who can choose the one that survives the longest And do like every episode we check in To see how our Dave's are doing

How many views our Daves have got There he is At the Angel of the North Fantastic Can someone add that to the stretch? For it for me, please. Yeah, that's the best thing I've ever seen. I wish I could provide details like just my uncle at the Angel of the North.

A great family fun day. There was a ball pit and everything. There he is. I've changed my mind. I know where I'm going to put Dave and I'll have it in just a moment. I can't believe it's this. It's just like when we edited the information for the Make My Meatface factory. And just change the business information.

Suggest an edit. Yeah. It was like, okay, approved. Why? Suggest an edit. Why has that been approved? Why am I allowed to do that? I was going to say,

it's not going to be long before we get banned from Google, but if that guy can plaster his knob all over the world, that's right? This is nowhere near as damaging. Just because we're whipping out our DBP everywhere, it doesn't mean that we... It's a cheeky Benson. Have we just invented a new thing called Dave bombing?

Yeah. You put like a relevant picture of Dave in a location. photo uploading yeah I'm going to do it I'm going to put him in the car park as well done right add this man to the car park

can't wait for this podcast episode to come up with his evidence in a courtroom it's going to happen I love it thanks for sharing your photo your photo will be public on Google Maps soon contribute more it says I don't like that my photos had 10 views

how is that even it tells you how many views your photos had I'm scrolling I'm doing a big scroll trying to find my picture be in there somewhere it will be oh god my bloody name's attached to that picture

yeah so's mine so is fine oh oh Jesus I've also picked a popular site here oh fucking out I'm just clicking through my profile and like there's no reviews there's two photos of Dave Benson Phillips it's already had four views

the Angel of the North parking and Angel of the North actual Angel of the North and then if you go to the edits tab, it's the, it's the approved change for Feld Hoyer's food groups, GMBH. What a legacy. I just changed the category of their business. Fuck me.

I picked a, we might have to move on while I'm scrolling down here to find mine because there's just the same photo over and over again. I can see, I mean, it's a highly photographed landmark, but. Oh. Big shout out, by the way, to the people who've left reviews from Poddiots for Feld Hoyer's food group. Oh, really? I'm just discovering me. Yeah, Liam Pickles, five stars, meat.

Daniel Tribe, five stars, meat products. Leather duck, five stars, Billy Babylonie. Five stars, sausage boy, the best meat products to put your face on. And five stars, Connor Bennett, the best meat products, don't forget to tell your friends. Brilliant. Well done, guys. Oh my God, that's so good. Oh, dude.

All from like six months ago. Completely missed that. I may never, I may never see Dave again. He's somewhere in the ocean. Dave's face, a very, a close-up of Dave's happy face is now listed amongst one of thousands of images of Mount Rushmore. And I really wanted to get a screenshot of Dave alongside four great presidents. But he's just gone forever.

Oh, fucking hell. I'll never find the image again. This is brilliant. I posit now that every episode where we post the Dave to Twitter, we also add Dave to the same landmark every episode. So we just slowly build a supply of Dave Benson Phillips photos on our landmark. A Dave to base. Very good, yeah. That's very good. I like that.

Yeah. Do you think one day James could be like I'm in the family I have a trip up north what's the to do and then he just sees himself He's just going to see himself in a ball pin

I don't remember that I've never been to the age of the north I don't know if you'll find yours easily Peter because I found mine by chance and it wasn't at the bottom it was just like halfway through so I don't know there were like different tabs on the left hand side

you could scroll between and it was like your reviews and photos and right yeah and my photo and stuff. Okay, well, I'll make sure it's on there, but I'll ask a question, in fact, as well do next. Okay. So, you get to bring back, this is from L, sorry, at L is playing with underscores on Twitter. You get to bring back one TV show from the dead. What is it? And why? I've got a couple of potential answers. One more predictable than the other. I've talked before

about how frustrated I was that the final season of Whitechapel never got greenlit so I would bring that back purely for selfish reasons just because I want an end to that story but putting that aside I would bring back Michael Barrymore's

kids say the funniest things Oh my God, actually Yes, yes, okay I was wobbly there but now I'm on board Which which was, I believe, originally an American format

that was just imported. Well, yeah, there's Bill Cosby in America. Oh, God, it was, wasn't it? Oh, no, I forgot about that. Oh, no. What is with that show and disgraced presenters? I mean, there's different levels of disgraced, but, you know, whatever.

Michael Barrymore, I suppose innocent until proven guilty, but weird stuff happened at his house that is yet to be fully explained. but that aside I remember watching that show as a kid and pre-controversy I was a huge Michael Barrymore fan

I thought he was one of the best people on TV you know he was a great host it was very entertaining and even putting him aside that show was great like they would just put three kids on chairs on the stage and they would literally just ask them questions

like you know what does your mummy and daddy do and what's your favorite thing in the world? And the kids would just always come out with absolute gold. I mean, presumably they filmed for about twice as long as any given episode turned out to be post-edit. But I remember finding that show really funny, even as a child. So, you know, I think that would be great to bring back.

You know, Lizzie would have kids as young as like four or five on there. and yeah just bait them into saying brilliant stuff and I presume Pachiti has a suggestion box in the office but I'm for seeing next Tuesday if he hasn't already absolutely yeah absolutely needs to be amongst the roster wow yeah yeah I forgot about that show yeah god I think for my for my serious show like much like your Whitechapel the one that I want a conclusion to is the UK version of Utopia

fucking yeah that was really good like sci-fi series which got cut short and it had so much potential but they stripped it away but if I wanted something just purely for enjoyment I want a new series of Takeshi's castle but that is just basically exactly the same as you all do on

not overproduced not weird just like just get Craig Charles back in the room and get him laughing at some people falling over I just want some more of that please thank you I would love that and also just so I can have the chance to have a go of the course yeah yeah that'd be a life for

dream come true uh i've got three uh two of which are comedies and parks and wreck is i think probably my favorite television show ever and i think it's also got one of the strongest final seasons of any show in that it wraps it up so nicely and so wonderfully that they should never ever touch it again apart from the brief covid episode they did like everyone did last year where it's just all on zoom or whatever um but still very selfishly i want all of the cast to come back and do new seasons you know that would have been great to have them sort of react to Pokemon go in all the parks and like why are all these people in the parks and stuff yeah that's good good show there's it was they were just such an inherently likable bunch and there were so many brilliant characters and

supporting characters in that show that i just i wouldn't be sad if it went on forever but obviously it would be diminishing returns and it would be terrible before too long. But I would, I would like that to come back. Also, if they managed to get all of the cast back, community. Obviously, Donald Glover is supremely successful outside of that now and he left a couple of seasons before the end and then it sort of nose dived in quality to an extent. But if they could get to sort of their season two, three, heyday when it was just sort of like peak television, peak comedy television, very Dan Harmon, really, really good stuff. I would love for that to still be going.

And my third option is a wrestling show, and that's Lucha Underground, which was absolutely absurd, and it was set in this like grungy warehouse, and there was like a dragon man and a man from the future who travelled through time, and it was really sort of telenovela, like intentionally hokey with its special effects and stuff. It was so stupid, but it was amazing, and I loved it. And they did four seasons of it, and then it got cancelled. Oh, wow. And it was shot like a proper TV show, so it wasn't like wrestling, which just never ends.

It just goes on and on and on and on. And I would love for that to come back, too. So, yeah, there's a few. That's the kind of wrestling that I could get involved in again. Like, I quite liked, and I guess they still do it to an extent. I don't know if they do it more or less, or maybe they don't still do it in kind of wwe but when you know the notion that like one of the wrestlers is undead and you know like you know one of them is like maybe i don't know like a time traveling pirate or something like stuff like that

i always thought was like no this is this is cool and like weird and stupid like if if you know because i find wrestling a little bit it's it's silly and cheesy and a bit ridiculous and i kind of feel like if it's going to be like that it should go it should come in all the way and it yeah There should be like an alien in it and there should be, you know, a bit like, I guess that's partly why I like Tekken. Yeah, it's very Tekken. It's sort of Mortal Kombat and Tekken, the TV show, Lucha Underground. Yeah, I was going to say, most, probably most big fighting franchises do similar things in the gaming

world where you have like a bear or like a lizard and they're fighting. Well, there is a lizard. There's a lizard in it. She's a person, but she wears a luchador mask and she is just, she's a lizard. That's what she is. That's what she's meant to be. She's the lizard queen. That's her.

Oh, it was so ridiculous. It was so stupid. The owner worked out of a little office right next to the ring and would sometimes come out during matches and change the rules. And his half-brother, who's a monster, who's sort of like bought from that episode of the Simpsons, lives in the basement and he has a special key. And he lets him out and he kills people. And then he goes back in again.

It's so ridiculous. It was brilliant. I loved it very much. You've very much sold me on this series. I've got to say that... Oh, you should look it up. Lucha Underground is fantastic. So good.

I heard it being talked about in the office from time to time, and I just assumed it was... Yeah, just a popular Mexican wrestling, pro wrestling show, like basically just a BWE, but kind of based in South America or Central America or something. So I just assumed it was relatively straight, but just with Luchadors in it. But, yeah, it sounds good.

Very hammy, very over the top. It's good stuff. Recommend it. I've been scrolling for fucking ages. Still going. On the latest photos of Mount Rushmore, Dave is not there, but I've checked Google,

and my contributions to Google in the photos tab are a photo of Dave Benson Phillips to Mount Rushmore. So... Nice, it is there. If anyone can find Dave in the photos of Mount Rushmore

and send us a screenshot of him amongst other photos of Mount Rushmore, I'd be very pleased. There's pictures of... You can see other people who've abused this to a lesser extent

where they've just put like their Lego build of Mount Rushmore into the photos. But I could scroll all day and seemingly he's not in the quote unquote

latest photos so I don't know I don't know what's going on. Dave Graham Lincoln. Yes. Someone's put a photo of Donald Trump just a photo of Donald Trump

as in I guess they're saying that he should be carved into it as well. Well, didn't Trump ask about that? Apparently that was a story. Yeah, he's like quietly asked like, yeah. Can we add another face to the mountain? Yeah. What a bell end.

I'm going to have to stop scrolling because every time I scroll, I'm thinking I'm going to have to make sure I edit the scrolling noise out of the podcast. And the more the more I scroll, the, uh, what if you, like, you just send meters away from Benson? If you stop now, you'll never see it. That could be. That's the thing. I'm holding my mouth. my mouth, my mouse away from my microphone, but...

To hear a creaking away in the background. Where is he? Google says he's on there, but he's just not. He's in there somewhere. We'll find it. We'll find him. We best move on, I'm afraid, but, man, I'm going to give up. Is it Mikey's turn?

It is my turn. You find yourself cleaning out the basement of an old British army base, and you cross... You cross? Yes. Good job, Michael. First line in you're nailing it. And you come across an ancient, dusty film reel. You hook it up. The projector, words to life.

That's the noise. Warm it up. On 1,000 tastepost. Vanilla. Cream. That's a 10. That's a 10. Sorry, Michael.

The projector, words to life, and grainy old black and white images begin to play in front of you. And the narrator explains how a drug was given to the Royal Marine Commandos in a cup of water 25 minutes later the first effects of the drug

became apparent welcome to the true tale of when the British army toyed around with giving unsuspecting men a mind-altering chemical namely LSD is this the story that those

sort of gifts slash videos came out of where it's just men just they can't cannot. They just cannot, I can't even think of the word. They can't control themselves. Yeah, they can't soldier. They're just sort of like laughing hysterically. Oh yeah. Playing with their helmets. Not like that. Just sort of being quite daft. Yeah, this is exactly. It's quite a famous

video and I've seen clips of it. But sitting down and watching the full 15 minute thing is an experience and it's even better like once you realize just how true it all is and kind of just the full story surrounding it and how bonkers it is. So come with me on a drug-induced adventure, boys. Do we have to take drugs to be on the adventure? Well, you'll find it's already been added to your water, so you should stop. Oh, no, no, I can't soldier. So this black and white footage from 1964 shows the usually ferociously well-driven servicemen, well-drilled servicemen, and I apologise, lying flat on their backs, helpless with laughter or staggering against trees, intoxicated by the hilarity of the whole situation, and of course also intoxicated by the acid.

These experiments gave a whole new meaning to the war on drugs. The narrator proclaims, it's a very cutesy, like classic, And the boys, they went out, and in 50, it's that kind of voice. Yeah, some British path. British path. One hour in 10 minutes after taking the drug. I'm not going to do the accent. With one man climbing a tree to feed the birds,

the troop commander gave up, admitting he could no longer control himself nor his men. He himself then relapsed into laughter. That's a taste of what... These men weren't armed, were they? We'll get into that. Oh, fucking hell. This field exercise conducted by the government's secret

porting down chemical weapons research establishment was the first in a series that would end in failure. It was about a half a century ago now that the military's experimentation with acid ended with the chairman of the Chemical Defense Advisory Board declaring that the idea of using LSD as a weapon of war was more, quote, more magical than scientific. This example was one in a series of quite nefarious experiments with the mind-altering chemical, lysurgic, acid, diathlonide.

There you go, you learn something as well. That's what LSD means. Look at that. I've already forgotten it, though. Me. In the early 1950s, they had explored the possibility of administering LSD in interrogations as a truth drug. British servicemen were allegedly asked if they would volunteer to help with research into finding a cure for the common cold. Then it was later claimed that they were given LSD, which is, wowie, what a sucker punch that is. Drink this water, it'll take your sore throat away.

There you go. You'll be all right. By the early 1960s, Port and Down had the same interest in nerve agents. but the focus on LSD had shifted from its potential use as a truth drug to a means of incapacitating the enemy. The hope was that LSD and other such chemical weapons could produce a, quote, humane type of warfare, which... I mean, it's right when going around tripping up balls trying to feed the birds. It definitely changes the vibe of the battlefield. They tried all sorts of things during these trials. In 1962, the British noted that their American counterparts were,

exploring the possibility of weaponising cannabis to make it a battlefielding capacity. I'd like to see that. Everyone just has a good time and has a few crisps. That would be very down. Yeah, I'll sit down. I'm too tired. Just pass the Pringles. It'd be all right. And so, on Tuesday, December 1st, 1964, 17 volunteers from the 41st Royal Marine Commando were given water containing 200 micrograms of LSD. I've got no idea what that means. assume that's a good amount. There would eventually be... That's a lot of tiny, tiny amount.

I'm assuming that wouldn't be two grams, would it? No, two micrograms. It's like, what is a microgram? That's tiny, tiny. Yeah, it's very tiny. I just Google it and it says it's really small. The Google image results, you can't even see it.

There would eventually be three such field exercises. Someone at Porton Down had the sense of humor to recognize that the letter's LSD were also the pre-decimal symbols for pounds, shillings and pence. Hence the codenames, money bags, recount and small change. Money bags. I think it's very cheap. Hey, they're good code names.

Leave them alone. Money bags, the December 1964 exercise, was the first. For the sake of safety, the troops didn't handle any live animation during the exercise. You'll be glad to know, Ben. Okay. So it was all safe. It was essentially, yeah, it's a fake scenario. They're instructed to act as realistically as possible.

Just pretend it's an actual procedure as training missions tend to go. The 17 Marines were tasked with capturing as many terrorists as possible and hunting for hidden stores during a training exercise. There was an initial control group who performed their duties with great skill exactly as they were trained to do. And so with the first group passing with flying colours, it was time for the the trippers to come out the second day the exercise was when things started to get interesting after drinking a very out of tune like trumpet like the trumpet player is high

as fuck and he's trying desperately to play that laughing through the trumpet and here they come I'm shambling out actually that's where the first grateful dead album came from it was a military man on the trumpet who just freestyled it. it and invented the whole new juggie music. Take that Grateful Dead. Fucking unexpected slam from Michael Johnson. Grateful Dead, whoa, Grateful Dead are known for their LSD influence. It's a compliment, if anything.

Is it? Probably not. I don't know. I don't know. As long as it doesn't sound like an out-of-tune trumpet, then that's why. No, it's not. It's a lovely little group of hillbilly hippies. He's having a lovely sing-thong.

Anyway, anyway. After drinking their LSD, the Marines headed to Port and Down for a small-scale field exercise in which they were hunting the six terrorists. As you could guess... That's a really bad start to any sentence or story. After drinking their LSD, the Marines went to the nearby town to hunt terrorists. I can only go badly. Oh, God.

They captured six squirrels. They interrogated them for hours. It was a nightmare. As you could guess, it did not. proceed with the normal military efficiency. Things started off relatively normal. The men proceeded with their mission and made ground towards their objectives. They did so with great skill, using everything they had learned through their years of training.

So, like, they're going through the fields, like the spread out as not to, you know, be an easy target. They're ducking undercover and, like, you know, every once in a while stopping to get, like, a glance at what's ahead of them, you know, just doing it as you should in a battlefield scenario. The sober narrator explains, at 1140. the first effects of the drug make their appearance and as a result two marines are reported to the troop commander for insubordination. The men at this time were completely unaware that their behavior was due to the drug. So a little bit into the mission, some men start acting a bit weird and the

commander's like, well lads, calm down, come on, get it together. The commander at this point, also under the influence of the drug. The troops push on, but now with a complete lack of urgency to their actions, just giggling the entire way, not bothering to take cover, just kind of meandering through this field. At this point, the scene is more reminiscent of a lovely walk through the woods as opposed to a finely tuned military mission. As they proceed, suddenly they come under, quote and quote, enemy fire from a distant combatant. So over in the distance, there's this little shed kind of structure and blanks are being fired towards the men. The men jump to the floor for cover, still continuing to giggle all the while

the umpire ruled that the radio operator of the group had been killed by the fire and thus left the mission not that he was much use at this point anyway as he was rendered completely unable to operate his equipment in his current state so one man down they were tasked then with decommissioning the enemy combatants and so the rocket launcher team was deployed

oh one man right okay So, yeah, I think they signal back and get the rocket boys on the goal. And at this point, the documentary cuts to footage of two men fumbling around with a rocket launcher, like struggling to even pick up the weapon, eventually gets on his shoulder, and it's just rocking everywhere. Like, it's completely the uses at this point. And they're both just, again, smirking and giggling to themselves this entire time while holding this massive weapon. And so it's established that they're completely incapable of carrying out this task as well. At this point, it's all kind of gone to shit.

There's a lull in the battle. And the men simply just begin hanging around in the trees, laughing, having a nice time with each other. Suddenly, a flashbang is deployed amongst the men. But only one soldier responds sufficiently to capture the combatant. The others don't really do anything, despite literally being so close to an enemy. They just kind of stand around and look around. around, like, what's just happened? One man slowly staggers towards, like, a bit of the trees trying to find out where this has come from, and no one else really gives a crap of what's going

on. With that, um, combatant captured, the men attempt to carry on and try to navigate to the next objective. At this point, the next objective is a mere 700 yards away from their current position, and this is in the middle of a wide open country field. So theoretically, this is home run, easy navigation. But they are so disoriented that they're incapable of figuring out the map and so begin arguing them on to each other trying to figure out where exactly is they're located on the map. And look at this with the lens of these are highly trained military people. Yeah, yeah. The picture of a group of men pointing at a map going, no, no, no, we're here. No, no, that's ridiculous. We're here while in the middle of a wide open field is quite amazing.

a lot of men at this point have no clear objective the commanders have no idea what they're doing and soldiers continue to line the floor and giggle profusely at this point the film pans to a prone giggling marine to an almost destroyed tree trunk

one soldier had almost managed to fell a tree using just his spade and it's not made clear if this was part of the mission or if he just did it for fun but it's quite impressive the commander at this point deems himself incapable of controlling

his men and steps down from his position. And the rest of the men just try and fob off this duty amongst each other, basically going, no, I'm not doing it, you do it, you do it for a couple of minutes. And while the men are here gathered arguing amongst each other, an enemy combatant just simply walks right past them completely undetected. Fucking hell. Just 70 minutes into the mission, with one man up a tree and the troop commander helpless, they just give up on the mission entirely.

the men now without any objectives and no mission and just simply awaiting transport back to the base just allow the drug to take hold and can be seen rolling around on the floor, giggling, having a great time and vehicles arrive to collect the men but at this point reality was so distorted that some of the men were just completely unwilling

to go near the vehicles and enter them I guess you're in the middle of a forest and this big van comes up and you're not doing that and you're on LSD it's a mad experience but eventually they all get them in

they heard them together and they return to the base at this point they're just casually sitting around discussing the effects kind of enjoying it but the commander tries to rein the men in

tries to get a bit of order going on but is instead just faced with laughter from the troops and one of the men even responds you're joking I think he asked them everyone stand to attention at the side of your beds

and everyone just kind of continues lie they're like joking on you're bugger off in another room the troop commander is experiencing one of the characteristic effects

of the drug everything he looks at appears to be patterned while looking at the white ceiling he describes geometrical patterns which are coloured and three dimensional they appear to move in and out of each other

and there's a little clip of him describing this and he just stood there like swaying just like with his hands going like moving his hands back and forth trying to replicate the motion it's absolutely mental to see one soldier who seemed to be in the throes of a bad trip was completely divorced from morality

Even now, three and a half hours after the administration of the drug, he does not know what he is doing or where he is. The Marine can be heard telling the medical observers, no, I've not died, mate. Back in 1964, the obvious incapacitation of the Marine seems to have been considered an encouraging start. So, I mean, if you want to tranquilize soldiers, it seems like a very good way to do it.

It is effective. Sadly, there was some concerns. After this experiment, recreational use of the drug was completely banned in the UK, and they considered delaying more trials with the drug until more was known about the long-term effects. The committee also noted, disconcerting results in one particular case of multiple self-administration and concern over possible addiction. Presumably, one of the port-and-down scientists had grown rather fond of the laboratory stock and made a name for himself as just sampling the product.

Wow. but the needs of humane warfare seemed to have come first. With all this in mind, they just carried on with more experiments. But sadly, all of them kind of finished with the same results. Well, not sadly.

It went well over and over again. So theoretically it could have worked, but they came into issues with how you actually administer the drug on a battlefield, because you can't exactly go to the enemy and say, here, have a glass of water. Yeah, I didn't wonder what the plan was there.

Like, if this turned out to be a good thing to use? Like, what do you do? You know, how do you get that in there? So they attempted, at some point, to deliver the drug in like a chemical gas cloud. Right. But there's the sheer amount of the drug

that you need to make that work is like, if it even works, it's going to be, it's going to mess someone up for a long time. And it's like chances of your own men inhaling it. We're pretty high. And at this point, they just thought, nap. Screw this. Not worth the effort.

And let me see. they're just totally, totally canned everything from there, deciding completely unable to use this in a battlefield, which probably is for the best. So at this point, the right decision was made in 1968 to cut the trial short, citing the notion of an incapacitator is a little more magical than scientific.

But there are evidence there, it's all you can say. But thus marks the end of LSD's time as part of the British Army's arsenal. Thankfully, the British Army's experimentation with the drug was a lot more innocuous than the American Americans during MK Ultra. They did some bat shit insane stuff for the drug. So just like

poisoning water supplies with it. Well, they were looking into like psychic stuff, mind control, weren't they? Partly via drug administration and stuff. But yeah, that's really weird stuff there. Yeah, thankfully

the British just gave it to some soldiers in a field and let them plod around for a bit and decided that's not worth it. Yeah, I After this, the British Army decided the experimenting was best left to the hippies. There you go. I highly recommend watching the video. It is hilarious seeing it in full context. If you just Google British Army LSD, that will come up.

I remember reading a study when I was doing psychology about it was, I think the whole point, the reason that we learned about it is because it was just like someone had just done something and called it an experiment, but it was like, what was the point of this? were you doing and they gave LSD to an elephant oh god yeah but they gave it even when you account for the size difference between a human and an elephant they gave it the equivalent amount of LSD that was a hundred times the dose you would have given like if you convert it into a human so the amount they gave to the elephant would be the equivalent of giving a human a hundred times the regular dose and that the elephant just like went like really crazy for a very brief time

and then it just, I think it just like had a heart attack and died. And it's like, okay, what have you learned there? What, hello? What were you doing? What were you doing? What were you doing to this expecting? Yeah. Maybe it could have increased brainpower of the elephants.

Yeah. Sadly, that's not how it works. Well, it's time for our final question. Thank you, Michael, for that. Thank you, boys. Ridiculous. I feel like we've not had this question before, but I've got a backup in case we have. Foxy-noxie at Shawnee,

score on Twitter, it says, what's your favourite holiday memory or strangest experience whilst there on holiday, presumably? Have we, we? We've not done that before, have we? I don't think. I don't think so. We might have done, like, where's the best place you've been, but in terms of specific

memories, do you have any fond or strange holiday memories? I've got a very weird thing that happened to me in San Francisco, which, again, we've been doing this podcast for too long to the point where I think every anecdote has been told, but I will tell this again in case I've not told you guys it before. So we were in

San Francisco and there is a bit of an issue in San Francisco with homelessness and mental health issues and drug abuse and things like that. It's kind of a well-known thing that it affects the city quite badly. So you do see quite a lot of people wandering around who clearly are in need of some help but a really strange thing happened to us where me and all my family were there years and years ago, I was about 13 and we were walking through Golden Gate Park and I was hanging slightly back behind the rest of my family and as I'm walking along this guy walks past me very very briskly he's this really tall guy who was like 6-2 really thin and he looked like he was on an absolute mission and he had a white lab coat on

but I noticed that underneath his lab coat he seemed to be wearing pajamas and slippers so I was like right where is this man from why is he in pyjamas but he's got like a doctor's coat on you know what's going on here and as he passed me

he reached into the top pocket of his lab coat he grabbed a handful of single dollar bills and threw them into the air and they went all over the floor and then he absolutely like legged it past my family and I was actually

I reacted quite in a well let's just say I might not react the same way now but I was like oh oh mom stop that man he just dropped his money as though like

I was like oh this man just dropped a load of money stop him stop him and I started gathering up all this money but he just like got out of there as soon as he could so then we had all this money all this cash and for a minute my parents were like

is this could this be laced with something like what is what was that man doing but in the end we just we took it and we went and had we went to like the the Japanese gardens I think they were it's a long time ago now

and we just had like green tea in the Japanese gardens on that man I mean let's face it what I'm getting at is he looked like he'd escaped from some sort of institution by stealing someone's jacket but I don't know what was going on

Yeah. That was pretty weird. How strange. I've got a similar-ish thing, not a man throwing money, but we used to go on holiday and do the, I don't know if you're familiar with a key camp. No. Which is like a brand of sort of package holidays that you can do in France, perhaps other places in Europe as well, but we used to do them in France. I've done similar things. We went to sunsites. Oh, yeah, that does sound very similar.

Yeah, and you just stay in a big tent. Is that it? It's like all set up. Oh, ours were like static caravans. Oh, right. Okay. But yeah, there was like a kids club. Yeah, I went to the kids club.

So your parents could relax. Yeah. You had to go and do shit. Exactly. It was just sort of like, yeah. They were like big tents that you could stay in. They had like a big sort of kitcheny communal area. And then there were separate compartments for people to sleep in.

So it was quite exciting. I think it was quite a cost effective holiday as well. and we used to get the ferry over and drive, and my dad would drive us. And one of the times, or perhaps a few of them, maybe, but certainly on one of the occasions that we had an issue with the car, it was like a knackard old Volvo, and the immobilizer on the locks used to play up from time to time, where it would just lock you out.

And you just sort of had to wait for the car to calm down, and then you could get back in. And I distinctly remember one time While we were waiting for our ferry We were in Calais And we'd gotten something to eat And we were parked near the sea Just so we could, you know

We had a view of some kind And the immobilizers fucked up And we were we were sort of stranded there With our ferry crossing impending Unable to get back into the car Because the immobilizer was just like No no you're not getting in You've got to wait

I think my sister cried. It was all very stressful. Oh, no. But we did, we did manage to get there, to get the ferry in the end. But that was, that's a memory that stuck with me is, is being temporarily marooned in Calais because our old Volvo just, um, just locked us out. Wow. Wouldn't let us in.

That was a thing that could happen. That is kind of horrifying, isn't it? Yeah. Didn't know if it would let us in. This isn't a particularly like weird and wacky one, but it definitely took me by surprise It was a lot of fun. As then when me and Claudia were in Singapore, we're visiting her sister and her boyfriend. And I think it was on like our last night in Singapore, like a last full proper day to enjoy it.

So we'd gone out for a meal, we're out for drinks. It was getting late in the night. It's right, right, let's get a taxi home. And so we sit there for about five minutes and then suddenly just this van pulls up. Basically, like a pimped out transit van is the best way I could describe it. The door slides open. it just reveals this neon bath party zone in the back of a van. So there's like speakers playing with music.

The van had neon lights underneath there. It's like lights spinning everywhere. I think there was some like fog rolling out as well. And I like, and it just turned to us like, right, this is the ride. Get in. It turns out in Singapore, there's a thing called like party buses, which essentially operate like taxis and you can just hire them to drive your round places. And you get in the back and it is just like a mobile party.

They've got like a sound system. You can choose any song you want to play. It'll get blast at the loudest volume. The best bit was the driver serves drinks while he's driving. What? So you just sit, could we have some vodka please? And you pour out a couple of shots for you, hand them back. And you carry, just carry you on driving.

And you're there, sing your heart out to the Venga boys drinking vodka in the back of a pimped out transit. And that's amazing. We got there and one piece. It was a wonderful, wonderful time. That's brilliant. I think we do that in the UK. now you can hire party buses What? Oh my

wait I don't think they just drive around Yeah I don't think they serve you The driver serves you drinks And the driver doesn't serve you drinks But people I've seen on like on TV and stuff I don't know like I don't know where I would have seen it But people

You hire a bus It's got like a basically a disco inside it Disco you know A club Disco yes We're going out for a disco on Saturday Yeah And yeah there's like

There's music and lights, and there probably are drinks there, but I don't think the driver serves them to you while you're driving along. That seems insane. I overtook one, leaving Gateshead. Oh, yeah. Well, really? Yeah, yeah. It's just a van that just said party van on the side.

Oh, yeah, look at that. That's incredible. Oh, God, yeah. Yeah, I guess the difference in Singapore is that these just operate like taxis. Like, they'll just park up outside of, like, popular areas just waiting to pay people up. That's great. There's like a whole army of them. It is absolutely amazing.

Wow. Incredible. Well, there we are. That's the podcast. Would you like to know what came out on Vidiots Slash is coming out on the Vidiots YouTube channel three years ago over the next two weeks? I'd love to know.

Please. Here we go. So we've got a Vod of Vidiots Live. I think this may be the first live stream we did. We played Mario Party 4 and Worms. Yes, I think that was. That one. That's had a copyright claim.

Just, I don't know, I don't know what that is. Nintendo. From Beyond the Grave, Cheggers' party quiz. Oh, shut up, Cheggers. You're dead. There we are, legendary one. And he still makes it into Pod Squad every week. He does every single time.

I'm reading the description. In 2007, after the PS3 and Xbox 360 had launched, British C-List celebrity, Keith Cheggwin released a quiz game for PS2. Oh, God. I think that's generous. I think he's D-List. He's not really C-List. is he? Running the Gauntlet

Vanilla Minecraft episode 15 Insomnia 63 vlog Finding Billy's long lost cousin We handed out some of our art there

and people still have it I think Andy Welsh from overclockers gave us a big bag of Harry Bo which we distributed amongst everyone we saw definitely did

post some tat number 28 Noah and Billy Crochet Walrus Watch Dogs 2 Proximity Mind Challenge that was a fun one

I like that. That was a piece of cake episode. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I remember. Worst games ever, turning point, fall of liberty. This is where we discussed Nazis for the first time, I think. And the, uh, the pronunciation of Nazi. The Nazi menace. Yes, off of the 1940s in Britain. Nazis.

An explosive finale. Vanilla Minecraft, episode 16. There we are. A few dams. The end, we blew up the whole flipping town, didn't we? Start the trend. We continued to do. Vidiot's Live

Dark Souls remastered The Birth of Barbara Piss Oh wow Some real landmarks Yeah Oh Barbara's three years old then Barbara Barbara is

Barbara's gonna be three Yeah Holy shit Wow Big birthday Big Barbara birthday And that purely was off A Boppis

pun name wasn't it It was It was a freestyle naming thing Where it was We've got Boppis But that's actually An evolution

of the term Bupis, and before that it was Barbara Piss, and that's where that was the, is it etymology, is that there? Yeah, the etymology of the term Bopis, that's the history of it. Oh, the story that was spawned from that, truly magical. Unbelievable, it all started there. The betrayal, Worms Revolution. Hunting Hat Films, Prop Hunt, Part 1. Pottiet's episode 14, holes,

Fortnite sandwich making challenge. Oh, that's the one way. Bits a bit of sandwich out. Yeah, yeah, sorry. This is where Dave said to us, hey, you want to get those views? You've got to play some more modern games, and we're like, okay, but we're going to do it weird.

Yes, we're going to make it completely much. We're going to make sandwiches while playing Fortnite. And you know what? Didn't get that many views. So it didn't work. Your tat is beautiful. Post some tat number 29. And finally, worst games ever, Fight Club.

Oh, brilliant. And there we are. So that is what is coming out several years ago on Vidyat's. There is a place you can go. It's a magical place wherever something. Toys R Us. No, it's store.orgas.com, isn't it, Michael? You're absolutely right.

And I think actually the store's down right now. So I'm going to have to... Yeah. Foot you meant Toys R Us. That's down as well. That's down for good. Jeffrey and Helpers don't stock up the shelves anymore. Oh, no, per Jeffreys out on the streets, bless him.

But yes, store.orgscast.com provided the whole web stores online. You can find a wonderful selection of vidiates and poddiet's related merch. You've got hoodies, shirts and mug for wearing and using as drink receptacles. And the best thing of all this is is that you can get... Wait, I've spoiled it. I'm not going to tell you what you can get until I'll tell you how to get it. If you use code

Vidiates at checkout, you will get 10% of absolutely everything in the Yogs can. Everything! So you can use it on our stuff and other people's stuff, but preferably use it on our stuff. Cheers, thanks. Thanks so much.

YouTube, Twitter, Facebook.com, forward slash Vidiates official. Also, Twitch.tv.TV forward slash video. It's official. And of course, streamlabs.com forward slash poddiet's donations. Donate three pounds or more to get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the podcast. And join Pod Squad, Mikey. Kick us off once again. Billy Ray and the Clonosaurus. Stop turgling my Gergberg.

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as well, thank you two in the pink one in the stink Peter stole my Spiro porn Caroline come back I forgive you and Lauren Wales year Bob

Canada Communist Candy Party Head Chog, Chairman Mauam, Leon Gumdropsky Fredo Rick Engels Karl Marx Bar Peter's bed socks Ben saying beans Stephen and Olive are cats

The very generous Mr Macca Prince Beefcakes, Cunt Eastwood Just keep swimming ash Dick in the Bungillow Ben Potter's filth squad Dick and Femadom Jane Austen is Peter's mum, Cheggers jinkled jammed in a door,

Maidleys, airborne broth, I wonder, big our dick, dogging in Peter's tiny car. And that is your pod squad for this week. Thank you so much, everybody. Once again, streamlabs.com forward slash poddiet's donations, £3 or more to get a shout out. Mikey, where can people find you?

At Parrot Boy on Twitter is the best place to find me in all of my shenanigans. That's about it, really. and I stream on occasion on Twitch as well, Paraboy there as well. I recently watched the entirety of Shrek the musical there, and it was very good, and my channel hasn't been wiped from the internet with a DMCA strike by magic. Go check it out.

That's good, good stuff. And Peter, where can people find us? We are as a duo at Team Triple Jump on Twitter and Facebook, but also, of course, Twitch and YouTube. That's where the content goes out. Incidentally, I'll just take this moment to say, if you're a triple jump fan and you've not followed us on Facebook yet, please go and do that.

I know it's not the right channel to tell you to do that, but please do. But individually, I am that Peter Austin on Twitter and Instagram, actually, and Ben is Confused underscore dude on Twitter. Mm-hmm. Why not leave us an iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice to help something to do with Al Gore's rhythms? Thank you so much for listening, everyone. Do we have a final question for people at home?

Can we just task people with Dave bombing some places? It might become a dangerous epidemic, but I just kind of want to see him spread around the world a little bit. Five people have seen my Dave Mount Rushmore photo, but not me. I'm not one of them. Yeah, it's gone up. It's climbing. It's getting there.

Mine's still at one view, I guess, because it's such an obscure thing. It'll take up eventually. Just the business owner like, what the fuck? Maybe we request that Pod Squad Donators for next episode Their name is telling us where Dave's been Like Dave has been to the Eiffel Tower

Etc That'll be cute Yeah, let's take Dave on a holiday Tell us where you took Dave Like when you borrow the like The class mascot And you go on holiday with it and you take photos with like The Bear

And it's like, oh, the bear went to San Francisco Look, here's photos of the bear. We had a frog and he was called Phileas Frog You know, like around the world in 80 days It was great Very cute Fantastic So you're suggesting these people do

Do a Dave bombing And then stick the thing in their name Yes So two bits of homework this week Two bits of homework everyone Or just do a Dave bomb in your own time Yeah Whatever

Okay thanks so much for listening everybody We'll see you next time Look after yourselves Bye Bye Bye Bye.