Podiots - Podiots: Episode 87 - Comic Demise
Episode Date: October 5, 2021Peter's feeling a little sheepish, Mikey has a terrible holiday and Ben is running from the police Donate £3 or more to get a shoutout and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/podiotsdonat...ions/ New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord: http://bit.ly/VidiotsDiscord Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
Transcript
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Maybe it's Mabelaine is such an iconic piece of music.
Hit the track.
Everyone in the studio that I worked on this jingle with all had like childhood stories or
memories around either watching these commercials on TV or sitting with our moms while they
were doing their makeup and it became really personal for us.
Maybe it's Maybe it's Maple Lane.
Right.
So, Dave Benson Phillips has an eBay account.
He does, which he tweets about.
He does just tweet things that he's trying to sell.
Good technique.
Good technique.
I like it.
They don't get out to a wide audience.
And we know it's definitely, definitely his,
not only because he tweets out things he's trying to sell,
but also because one of the things that he's selling
was a badge with his face on it
which one of our colleagues at Triple Jump bought
and it arrived
was it today that it arrived Peter?
Yeah I believe so I think it cost two pounds
the final price it went for
I think it was a you could buy that one now
there are other things you can't buy now
you have to bid on them
and the postage was three pounds
so it cost more to post
But it came with even better
Its value was even higher than that
Because when it arrived
It had a handwritten note
By Dave Benson Phillips himself
Wow
Something along the lines of
Best wishes, Kieran
Love Dave Benson Phillips
Imagine buying that
Not knowing you're buying it from
actual Dave Benson Phillips
That's what we were saying
Earlier on actually
About the thing we're going to discuss in a second
is that imagine if this thing arrived
and you were just looking for one of these weird things
that Dave happens to be selling
and it's just got a note from some guy
called Dave Benson Phillips in the package.
I think for full context we should say
Yeah, what is the mystery item?
Well, he happens to be selling a toilet seat.
Two toilet seats actually.
Two toilet seats. One is sealed
and the one that we are currently bidding on
I will read the description here.
Please do.
Please note, this seat has had some considerable use.
Oh, God.
It's been thoroughly cleaned, anti-backed to within an inch of its life
and is now ready for use on any toilets
with the Carrara and Mata seat fittings already in place.
So obviously we saw that Dave Benson Phillips is selling one of his used toilet seats
and we thought, how could we not buy that?
It's also not just a regular toilet seat.
It's a sort of musical notes and keyboard printed toilet seat.
It's not your average white lid.
It is very much patterned.
It's special.
But it's like a coffee stain rugged texture, so it looks well used, but it's actually just the print.
It's very special indeed.
I don't even want to add it to the link dump or like, not the link dump, the photo thread,
because I don't want people to know that we're aware of it.
No.
Because he's tweeted this out before.
There are currently, there's currently 16 and a half hours left on it.
We're the highest bidder.
So by the time this episode comes out, we will know one way or the other whether or not we have won this toilet seat.
However, if we make it known to the vidiates and poddiet's viewer and listenership that we are pursuing this loose seat.
By posting it in the thread before the thing is closed, then, uh,
people might try and snipe it fast.
He's also selling a yellow wooden children's bed, which says well used, but not for a while.
Oh, no, that's sad.
It's a collection of the weirdest stuff.
It is.
It is.
It is the weirdest, imaginable stuff.
It's toilet seats, children's bread, children's beds, children's beds, and VHS tapes.
And old VHS tapes.
Dave does not know how eBay works quite clearly.
Not only is it evident in the fact that that tiny shit badge cost more to post than it did to buy when it's a tiny little badge, but also this toilet seat, it's a bidding only thing.
You can't buy it now, but you can make an offer on it.
And I made three consecutive offers.
You can only make three and then you can't make any more.
And each of them was automatically declined.
Because he's put a reserve on it for God knows what.
He thinks this seat is worth at least more than 25 pounds,
which is the maximum offer that we made in the end.
However, as it stands, it's going to go for significantly less
than the very first offer that we made on it.
So he just doesn't know, it just doesn't know how eBay works, I don't think.
Ben and I have had this, well, we've talked about this on several occasions
over the past week or so, but I will just repeat for the benefit of the podcast,
I love that not only are we bidding on anything from Dave Benson-Philip's eBay account,
but it's literally a used toilet seat.
Like, you couldn't write it.
If someone wrote that into the poddy it's sitcom, everyone watching at home would be like,
yeah, but that's a bit, you know, it's a bit much that it's a toilet.
That wouldn't happen, would it?
You know, maybe a VHS.
It's the most Dave Benson Phillips thing you could possibly hope to bid on.
His used toilet seat is that he sat on with his...
naked ass
He has tweeted this
It's had thorough use
Considerable
Considerable
Use has had some considerable use
Now because he's tweeted it
It is quite clearly
Public knowledge that Dave is the one
Who's selling this
So
When we win
Because I'm trying to be confident
About this
When we win
I'm going to ask him
If he'll sign the toilet seat
Even if he doesn't
we will sign the toilet seat
and then our plan is
to auction it off for charity.
Yeah, we will do.
Now you two can own
a slightly pissy toilet seat.
If you would like to own
Dave Benson Phillips
used toilet seat
and support a worthwhile cause
which we have not chosen yet.
Signed by the poddiots.
Signed by all three of us
and maybe Dave
then hopefully, wow.
Then please
stay tuned because we'll have more for you.
It's just the most insidious way
we could have done it. It's the most potty it's way we could have done it by if he does sign it.
And even if, actually, even if he doesn't sign it, we've had to pretend with someone else to
buy his toilet seat. It's like David's given it to us. It's not like with his blessing that
we're selling this for charity. We've just taken it from him. Do you think when you win,
he'll be like, Penn Potter, I know that name. Why do I know that name? Well, and he just stops it from
happening. Oh, I've thought ahead. I've thought ahead. You made a burner account.
No, no
I'm going to get it sent to the office next door
where Coltaholic are based
and I'm going to get it sent to Andrew
My name is nowhere near it
Does he know this is coming
And she does leave us
I will warn him when we win
No, don't
He doesn't need
No, he doesn't get a used toilet seat in the post
Okay
But I'm going to let some other people
He works next to know
So when it arrives they can tell him
One of my favourite things about this as well
is that among the VHS tapes he's selling,
of which there are two or three,
one of them is a copy of A Bridge Too Far,
which is, you know, not a very nice war movie,
and included in the listing, he's just written,
movie trivia.
The screenplay was written by William Goldman,
who also wrote the screenplays,
Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid,
all the president's men,
and he also wrote,
and his cult novel and screenplay,
The Princess Bride.
Thanks, Dave.
I go, that's what I go to eBay for.
It's movie trivia.
In the toilet seat listing, it has a hashtag, it just says hashtag neat toilet seat.
Oh, hopefully.
I did look for videos of the toilet seat on Twitter, but he didn't have put one up of it, sadly.
That's a shame.
Show us it in action.
Anyway, we'll keep you posted.
Hopefully, we've won Dave Benson Phillips' toilet seat.
But we're going to wait until it arrives before we celebrate, because anything could go wrong.
It could be all manner of videos.
waiting to snipe at the very
end of that listing. I've already had to
outbid someone else. Yeah, someone has
already bid on it, so...
Yeah, we're on seven... Just
for context, we're on £7.50
currently. For this toilet seat,
the Dave Benson Phillips thinks
is worth more than 25
pounds, apparently.
It's just...
It just never ends.
It's just like with the postage as well.
He's not... He's not put a
price down. It's just how much ever... how much ever
it costs for him to sort it out.
So you could end up paying through the ass for the postage on this.
Delivery varies.
We looked into his feedback.
And he's had at least two people cancel orders from him before because basically he lied about
the shipping.
And it said the posting would be so much, postage sorry, would be so much on the listing.
And then he's gone, actually, it's going to cost more, which isn't how eBay works.
And then the person's gone, no, I'm not going to fuck off.
I'm not going to pay that.
Get there on the apprentice.
He's a modern day business man.
He knows that I get money.
He said negative feedback as a result.
I do like the thing you found, though.
Yeah, Mike, I was going to say you've looked at the feedback he's given to other people, haven't you?
Oh, which one?
Oh, God.
Have you gotten in front of you?
It's in our WhatsApp, isn't it?
Yeah, it is in our WhatsApp.
I can see it.
The negative feedback he gave to somebody.
Just, yeah.
This was quite an old one as well.
But yeah, just left feedback.
They're great slippers.
Negative.
imagine receiving that
Dave you press the wrong button
Dave
Great slippers
One star
He's literally
God he's a living meme
From start to finish
And again
I want to make it really clear
That we love Dave
We do
We don't want to
We don't want to leave him out of it
Because he's an endless source of amusement
But we don't
We don't want to like
We're not being nasty to him
We don't want to be mean
We just he's just entertaining
And we hope that if it ever gets back to him
that we've continued to not leave him out of it.
It's because we just love his online antics, like so much.
We do.
And he was a formative part of our childhoods as well.
He was.
And he's selling two toilet seats on these.
Dave, if you want to be left out of it, you've got to stop doing this shit, man.
You've got to stop.
Why are you selling two toilet seats?
What is fucking used?
Nobody wants to buy this.
Only we want to because it's funny.
It's not worth 25 pounds, Dave.
Oh, God.
Can we please start the podcast?
Yeah, we should.
This has gone on long enough.
Hello, everybody, and welcome to Poddietz, the official.
Vidiates podcast.
It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us, where everybody brings a thing along to talk about.
I'm Ben
I'm Peter
And I'm Michael
Hey guys
How are we doing
Very good
Doing fantastic
How are you Ben
I'm okay
Good
Good
Yeah
Yeah
I'm not now
You know
Why
I was
But that was really
Oh that was horrid
Both of you
Why didn't you like about it
Oh I don't know
It just reminds me of
Like grandma
Grandma.
Pizza comments.
Come, this one, Grandma's love.
Oh, Brickis.
Well, we did spend a lot of time talking about Dave Benson Phillips,
so I suppose we can just move straight on to Pod Squad, can we?
We can. Let's do it.
Let's move straight onto Pod Squad.
Do you know you can support us financially?
Well, you can.
You'd be magnificent.
You join Pod Squad.
You get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show.
And you can do that by going to Streamlabs.com forward slash Podiot's donations
and donating three pounds or more to get a shout.
Mikey has the first group of shoutouts now in front of him.
So, yeah, these people are directly funding used toilet seat purchases.
Genuinely, actually are, yeah.
We start with Mr. Black, Wendy Miller, Trunter from the Lothian area,
an insignificant donation, oaky-dokey-doky-doky-doker,
raindrop joy
the incredibly generous
Samuel de Barber
it has been a while
since I've done a donate
but now with the degree done
and just the wait for results
I thought this was a good opportunity
so have some monies
you lovely lads
thank you thank you
congratulations on finishing
good luck with your results
on the degree yeah
I'm sure you've smashed it
thank you
yeah
DBP Simp Squad
Damn right represented
Full Force tonight
Lord Brottovich
The Simps Squad
Lord Brotovitch
Pro Traynor
I'm not going to do it all in the Simpsons
That'd be awful
Pro Trainer
Sorry let me just do Lord Broovitches again
Because I feel like he's been tranced over
By the Simpsons in personation
Lord Brotovitch
Lord Brotovitch
Pro Trainer
I can't believe you've done this
RIP. Have you heard about this?
What?
What?
I can't believe
believe you've done this. The original video has been taken
down from YouTube. Oh, I thought you were going to say he's done.
God, I thought you were going to say that as well.
Why has the original been taking, just the uploader
has taken it down? No, YouTube's took
it down for inciting violence or something.
Oh, come on. That fucking algorithm, man.
God's sake. Rest and peace to a real
one. Can't wait until Pierre gets it by a car
gets taken down, so watch it while you can.
Oh, man, yes, they say.
Insighting violence. God.
I had, yeah, I had some
old videos removed as well because it had some
explosions and stuff, I know, me as a
kid, so yeah, thanks, YouTube.
Jesus.
Shepard pie made of shepherd.
Oh, Keith Cuntwin,
the generous,
Deluxington, man or woman,
chaps, or chappesses,
or others,
here's the money I justly owe.
Also, if Caroline is single,
does she fancy going on a date?
Praise be to the mighty meat face.
How do you think about that?
Hopefully we'll hear from Caroline.
I don't know if we will, actually.
I don't know.
She sounds like trouble, Caroline.
It's been a messy breakup.
Yeah.
Better leave her out of it.
Ah, what is this word?
Alpha serpent.
There we go.
Got it.
Alpha serpent.
Rejected Podiot's names.
Carr gets hit by a Peter and Pingu's gay dad.
Thank you all.
I wasn't reading along and I was just waiting here where that last one would go.
Pingu's.
gay dad
and
this week in the
tiny troop we've got
I needed this
thank you
specky becky
Becky Stucalicious
Ben looks like
he smells nice
Bartek and
Chunky
O'Chucky
Bin La Doll
yeah from last week
last episode
we've got
the very generous
Amy
D'E
Ami
is it Ami
oh yeah I remember
this his name
Ami
Sange.
I haven't been able to donate since having a baby, but wanted to show my appreciation for how
wonderful you all are and for being the best boys.
The little man is 14 months now, and your dulcet tones have been there throughout.
So thanks, Ami, Katie, and Thomas.
Oh, congratulations.
So it's been that, I mean, because that's the name I remember, but it's apparently been
14 months since a donation, which is troubling.
I think talking about it in a previous donation.
a previous pod squad.
Oh, God, the history that's held in these donations amongst the word cunt.
Another name here I've not seen in a while.
They're very generous, one vowel from Shira, who says, it's not generous, just overdue.
Much love to you guys and the walrus clan.
It's a real get, it's like friends reunited this this week, isn't it?
We just need to hear from Chav Chavramar is.
We do, yeah.
We've got Michael Cheggson, yeah.
Mikey's roller scatting event
Oh no
Stephen Scodes
Slap him with bum piss
Ashton
Ashton
In a crop top shock
Oh there you go
I saw the word Nina in there
Ashton in a crop top shock
Deep Heat DP with DBP
Dick in the bungalow
Sorry
Fuckable Yakult
Oh, Finn Tristam, pubeless, Peter, and I sneezed, oh shit, literally.
Oh, no.
We've also got, oh, here it is.
Caroline, my lawyer, will call you.
Please, Peter, it's a hot pot.
Patrick, you flip-en idiot.
Michael Corleone.
Clue wouldn't download a house.
Mr. Macca.
Just keep swimming, Ash.
shitler's greasy ring
Fush and Shups
Beans motherfucker
A good toad in my hole
Puma Pants
Which I think only works
If you're American
Because it's actually Puma
Puma Pumor Pants
Prince Beefcakes
Gregor Monkey
Munky Chippy
Who are obscenely generous
And said an extra 50s worth of
Keys Keys
Thank you boys for making us laugh
For so many years
And counting it for being
such stand-up human beings.
Thank you.
Thank you very much.
To the monkey family there.
That's it.
But that's not it.
We've also got Jeremy Beedlewank challenge.
Mike Lighteris.
Yeah, that's it.
Caroline, where is Shedkey?
And a succulent Chinese niche.
There we are.
Fantastic.
What I want to end on.
Thank you so much, everybody.
you're amazing
and you can support us
and join PodSquod
by going to streamlabs.com
forward slash poddiet's donations
and donating three pounds and more
everybody
Mikey you are in charge this week
I am large and I am
indeed in charge
but you're not large then why look how much weight
you lost Michael John?
You're absolutely
yeah
yeah
very looking trim AF boy
thank you can you tell over the podcast
just how skinny I am.
I can barely hear you. You're so slim.
Oh, my God. Thank you. Thank you.
But I'm large in spirit forever.
If you don't mind, I'm just going to cross the room and put something soft on my guitar.
Because every time I speak, I can just hear it reverberating.
He's humble bragging about his guitar and his deep reverberating voice.
It's a guitar I don't play.
This fucking guy.
Guys, don't mind me. I'm just going to, I just need to move my mouth.
I just need to...
One minute.
I'm just going to drag my giant cock
over to the corner of the room.
Right.
That other sounds like a good name
for like a collection of dad power ballads.
Put something soft of my guitar.
Oh, I thought you were to say
my giant cock across the room.
Oh, God.
It's nearly Father's Day.
It's not nearly Father's Day.
Like, depending when you're listening to this,
it could be Father's Day right now.
And if you are listening with your dad,
sorted.
There you go.
You're more comfortable now.
Much more comfortable now.
I can speak without going...
Mm.
...and the other side of the room.
I don't like it.
Oh, dear.
All right.
Would you boys like a question?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yes.
We start with one from Stuart Christ.
Christ.
Christ.
Christ.
At Stucalicious on Twitter.
And they say,
it's time for the VCU to present themselves
in their own version of a cultural
staple, the soap opera.
We will need a show title, at least two
lead families, a regular
location, a bar, pub, office, or something of the sort,
a town bad guy or gal
and a cliffhanger to end the first episode.
Let's just do, I'll put this in so we've got the reference,
but if we had to make a soap opera
from the VCU boys,
what the hell would that be like?
Oh God, I don't know
I'm going to try and think up a show title
Yeah
I'm trying to think of like
What scenario
I'm almost leaning towards
I mean there's not a lot of them in the VCU
But D list British celebrities
Trying to get work again
Being like the central premise of it
Okay
Yeah
Maybe they're all like situated out of a warehouse
Where they live together
And
Maybe the two lead families
Are there's like a
CBBC household and then a CITV household.
You know, you've got Neil and
whoever the fuck helps from CITV, we reference,
which is, I don't know, jungle run.
Keith Chewitkegwin, he counts.
Naked, naked Keith Chegwin,
living with Neil Buchanan in a house.
And then in the other house, it's DBP,
it's Dick and Dom, it's,
who else is there?
Who else is there?
I feel there are more children's TV characters that we reference on there than just...
You did Neil?
You did Neil?
He did Neil.
He's CITV.
Maybe the Chuckel Brothers.
Oh, yeah.
Go in there for sure, yeah.
Why not?
Yeah.
Yeah.
I like the premise, though.
Yeah.
Yeah, that works for me.
God, it's coming on with a pun name is harder.
I can't think of any that would fit in.
Emmerdale, Coronation Street, EastEnders.
Hmm
Holly Oaks
Yeah that's what I was trying to think of one for
Billy Oaks
That wasn't really worried
Billy
Is it?
Billy Oaks
Billy Oaks
If it was a triple
Jump one
It could just be called
Emma Dale
Yeah I was thinking that as well
It's such a specific reference
Yeah
To that fucking bear
Oh man
Maybe it's
It doesn't need a vidiates
Pun title
It just needs
Something that tells you
The scenario
know, the washed-up, you know, kids' TV show people.
Yeah.
Oh, God, I'm trying my best for this.
This is tough.
I thought this would flow out, but it's actually a surprisingly difficult world to build.
Who would have thought writing a TV show from scratch would be tricky?
What about Devastation Street?
Devastation Street.
Yeah, big fan of that.
they're not all devastated
but some more than others
but they'd be written to be devastated
yeah
yeah I think
yeah
Neil Becannon's always pissing everyone off
because he's always practising with his band
and yeah there's nothing left in the kitchen
has all been used in big art attacks
his mum saying
Neil please
you need to make money for your family
go back to art attack
and he's like no I'm going to be a musician
pass me the salt mum
that's my calling
Dave's selling the toilet seats on eBay again
So you've got nothing to sit on
Steady income from Dave
Yeah Dave's like a wheeler dealer on eBay
Neil is a rock star
Yeah, starving artist
I think, yeah
Dick and Dom are doing DJ sets with Paul Chukle
Oh, that'd be late, yeah
Yeah, they've got a steady flow of income
They're student season as well
So they're breaking it in
And Keith Chegwin is just dead
He's naked
naked and dead at all times.
He's just laid out on the living room sofa.
Maybe he's presented all nice as if he's at a funeral,
but it's, you know, he's in his box.
He's in a suit, maybe, or maybe not.
You know, maybe he is naked.
But it's a funeral that never comes.
And all of them just acknowledge like,
sad day, isn't it?
Yeah.
But that's every day.
Every day is a sad day.
And he's a bit like, oh my God, they killed Kenny.
But it's not a joke.
It's not funny.
it's just Keith is always dead
I'm not green lighting this season
I don't think the show's got legs
the more we get into it
we've kind of sorted most of that
regular location would just be
the street they live on the Manchester Media City
perhaps
yeah yeah they just live in the
abandoned BBC old BBC television studio
Yeah, who's the town bad guy?
The town bad guy?
Yeah.
For those, probably the commissioner of the BBC,
yeah, almost certainly.
Rents to, boys.
Whoever the director general of the BBC was in 2004.
Yeah.
That's the bad guy.
Well, I mean, they probably were a bad guy.
Well, 2004, maybe not, but certainly, you know, 1980s, 1970s, a real villain.
Director General.
Let's have a look.
Who was it?
It was Mark John Thompson
served from 2004 to 2012
So he's the new guy in town in 2004
And I'm like, please
We're clinging to relevancy
And he says no
We're going in a new direction
Here's Bamzuki
Oh no
Oh yeah
Things changed
Look at you Mark
He ruined everything
He made 450 grand a year apparently
What?
Oh really?
I thought you meant Bamzuki did for a minute
He absolutely fucking not
so is that the cliffhanger then at the first episode they you know the first half hour is them
hearing the new you know news on the block uh there's a there's a new guy that's the first bit of
news second news is keith checkwin died yesterday um oh shit and then towards the end they managed to
get a meeting with him and they say hey can we do you want to give us a show maybe and he says
no i've got something much more exciting the door
explodes open in sort of bad
CGI effects
and Jake Humphrey walks in
with some sort of
16-legged centipede
made out of not many
polygons
Formula 1's Jake Humphrey
Yeah
Former Bamzuki presenter
Jake Humphrey
That's what he's known for
The guy who is openly spoken
about his disdain for video games
and how childish and pathetic
people who play video games are
despite the fact that he presented
fucking Bamzuki
where you couldn't even see the creatures
and everyone had to pretend
because they were there.
Everyone scream at this white table for 10 minutes.
Go play with your cars.
Oh, dear.
Wow, that really does.
It does change every photo of Bamzuki
when you realize they're just screaming at nothing.
Oh, wow.
Can we get one of those photos out
where there is just nothing on the table?
There's only Bamzuki behind the scenes out.
Sorry, I'm going totally on tangent now, but like Bamzuki's probably going to awaken a lot of, lot of memories for a lot of people.
Yeah, for the benefit of those who have no idea.
I mean, it wouldn't surprise me, actually, if that format was sold worldwide and they had some kind of Bamzuki in the States or Australia or whatever.
But for those who don't know, Bamzuki in the mid to late noughties, oh, well, Ben is handily copy pasted.
It was a computer-generated game show for children, presented by Jones.
Comfrey, competitors from across the nation
pitch their Zooks against...
I forgot they were called Zooks.
Sounds like a slur, isn't it?
Yeah.
They pit their Zooks against each other in fierce competition
and classic battles.
Oh, classic.
In other words, it was actually live action
for the most part in that there were people in a room
looking at a table, you know, in a studio,
but everything that was happening on the table
was added sort of in post
in a kind of augmented reality.
way so that you as a viewer could see that there were these really bad low-poly bugs crawling
around playing football and tug-of-war and stuff.
It laid the grand work for the Mandalorian, I think.
Yeah, exactly.
It looked so shit.
It was one of those shows like 50-50 where I was always just so disappointed when it
was what was on.
Yeah.
And the Zooks didn't like move properly and stuff.
You could make your own Zooks.
using their software
but most of them didn't walk properly
and they had no personality about them
but yeah they would
compete in these CGI games on the table
and everyone in the studio had to stare
at what was definitely just a white table
and go come on
come on banger
get him do it go banger
oh look out for Zooktron
he's coming
and do a lot of cheer
and stuff.
And it was, like, there was a narrator, like a commentator as well, I think, wasn't there?
Yeah, man.
Yeah, they should bring that back.
Well, actually, let's not bring it back.
It was awful.
Let's leave it in the past.
There was a 2009 revival of the series.
It originally added in 2004, which appropriately lines up with my offhand comment earlier,
but I did not intend it to.
The show itself, this is the description on Wikipedia from the 2009 version.
The show itself has now been considered, and then it says in brackets,
fictionally, by the government as if it were in a legal combat sport
and have been trying to shut down the underground organization
led by new presenters Barney and Gemma ever since.
There are now four teams in each episode with one Zook each.
They take part in a street race at the beginning of each show
and the winning team gets to pick an opponent in the next game.
The two losing Zooks take part in another challenge called a pressure pusher
with the Zook that loses it being destroyed.
Each time a Zook is destroyed, edited stock footage is used
to show the considerably comical demise of each Zoot.
This sounds amazing.
Oh my God, they turned it into an underground illegal street battle.
Edgy.
I'm watching a clip of it on YouTube now.
They're literally just running across rooftops in the UK
just these wobbly devoid animals on a badly Cigi-eyed roof.
That's incredible.
that sounds so much better than what we got
I love how they
13 episodes in 2009 and then it never came back
I love how they got rid of Barney
they got rid of Jake Humphrey because they were like
no it needs to be edgy and gritty now
and so they got they brought in Barney Harwood
did better make an appearance
that's what I think yeah Nev
oh he started doing
Jake Humphrey started doing real
quote unquote real presenting in 2005
so there's a good chance that
he was busy
back for that.
In 2009, he became the anchor for the BBC's Grand Prix for coverage.
And then presumably he tuned into CBBC to see Bamzuki's having street races.
Oh, I remember Gemma as well.
She did, like, loads of other shows and things.
She was my CBBC presenter crush when I was growing up.
Gemma?
Yeah.
Oh.
Yeah, I had a real crush on Gemma.
I don't think I ever fancied any of the presenters.
Damn, I missed out on some formative experiences there.
I'm just
I can't stop watching this now
but I'm just
Have you sent a link?
Can I please see it?
Yeah I sort of want to see these
Zooks on rooftops
I'm just looking at the names
of the Zooks now
one's called armed response
Armed response
The continuity at the start
before the show begins
is that that dog puppet
that we never got
after our time
And the guy with his Justin Bieber hair
Yeah
my favorite
when does it start
oh wow
there's sort of a filter
on the screen as well
just to make it look a bit more
hold on yeah
let me see back
this
it just looks so bad
oh my god
if you're not
if you're not there already
go to about
one minute 40
because that is incredible
okay hang on
what is
what is going on
why is there a man on a skateboard
in a suit
there's an old man on a skateboard
and then
Oh, it's Barney.
It's Barney in a mask.
That is absolutely horrible.
Man, top quality TV.
If you want to see some rooftop action 2430 is when...
2430.
Okay, if you search Bamzuki Street Rules Episode 10 on YouTube, you should find it.
What was it, 2430?
Yeah.
Actually, you go to 2530 a little bit after that.
Wow, sorry for everyone at home, but you are...
This is peak British culture.
Well, worth checking out.
witnessing and fold it's uh okay if you haven't ever seen it watch some of the
originals as it is just like there's more that is oh there they go over the rooftops wow
and they're still rubbish they are just they've got no traction these zooks they can't move
anywhere oh it's just so rubbish imagine like the creature maker in spore yeah it is just like
that except that it doesn't make them able to walk properly
And it qualifies his national prime time television.
That's fantastic.
Well, I could watch that for hours, but I feel like for the benefit of our...
We've got to move on.
We've got to move on.
We just went down such a rabbit hole there.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Who is our question from?
Stuart Christ.
Cheers, Stu.
Christ.
When any of you boys like to do a thing?
I've got a little Wikipedia here.
Oh, just a little Wikipedia.
So I've got...
There's a very, very short article that I've been wanting to bring along.
long, er long for a long time, for a long time.
But it's just too short to be a thing.
But I found a separate write-up that goes into much more detail.
But I will read the actual Wikipedia article first,
which will take me all of five seconds,
and then I'll give you a bit more detail.
But this is The Great Sheep Panic.
Okay.
Okay.
The Great Sheep Panic, also known as the Great Sheep Panic of 1888,
or the mysterious Oxfordshire Sheep Panic.
of 1888 was an event that occurred on the 3rd of November 1888 across southern England.
There are then six citations for that, just to prove that it definitely did happen.
Next section on the article is just called event, and here it is.
On the evening of the 3rd of November 1888, at about 8 o'clock, thousands of sheep had,
by a simultaneous impulse, burst from their bonds, fields, and dwelling.
and had been found the next morning, widely scattered,
some of them still panting with terror under hedges,
and many crowded into corners of fields,
some miles from the fields they'd been left in the previous evening.
In the end, it had spread over 200 square miles,
that's 520 square kilometres.
The Times reported on the 20th of November 1888 that,
quote,
malicious mischief was out of the question
because a thousand men could not have frightened
and could not have frightened and released all these sheep.
Interestingly, another panic occurred in 1889 in Berkshire, southern England, not far from Reading.
Next section.
Possible
Explanation
In 1921, the scientific journal Nature noted that the 3rd of November 1888 had been, quote,
an intensely dark night with occasional flashes of lightning and explained that, quote,
panics have often occurred for sheep are notoriously timid and nervous animal.
Hmm. Okay. That's the end of the Wikipedia article. It tells you very little.
It feels like there's more. There's more afoot here, Peter. I've so many questions, Peter.
Well, I've got a much bigger write up here from people who were there at the time. It also comes with this fantastic image, which is not at all relevant, but I think they just needed something for their article.
So they used creepy underscore sheep.p. p.m.g.
Oh, sweet Jesus. It's horrid, isn't it?
It's nightmare-inducing.
Oh, it's a real sheep.
God.
Yeah, that is a real sheep at someone's table.
I thought it was a man in a mask, but no, God.
No, that's a sheep.
They're timid preachers, Michael.
Not a notoriously timid.
A thousand men could have invited that sheep for tea.
This article, according to Esot Turks, that's E-S-O-T-E-R-X.com, begins with the sentence
sheep aren't stupid
They're almost as smart as pigs
And about the same level as cattle
Sure
They won't be writing any heartbreaking novels
Of staggering genius
Or winning on Jeopardy anytime soon
And they've been domesticated by humans
For at least 12,000 years
As a consequence
One might imagine
They have a pretty good idea
Of what they need to be afraid of
It continues like that
It kind of bollocks for a little bit
But I'm going to skip ahead slightly
So, curiously, on the fateful evening of November 3rd, 1888,
something collectively scared the bejesus out of tens of thousands of sheep
in Oxfordshire, England, a bizarre event that has not been adequately understood to this day.
Two local seed import-export men named Oakshot and Millard in Reading,
which seemed to be the epicentre of the event,
Millard, which seemed to be the epicentre of the event, sent a letter to the editor of the popular
Hardwick Science Gossip magazine
detailing the event
and wondering if anyone could offer
a plausible explanation.
Sheep panic near Reading.
I beg to call attention
to a remarkable circumstance
which occurred in this immediate locality
on the night of Saturday, November 3rd
at a time as near 8 o'clock as possible.
What?
At a time as near 8 o'clock as possible.
7.59, I guess.
Tens of thousands of sheep folded in the large sheep-breeding districts,
north, east, and west of Reading, were taken with a sudden fright,
jumping their hurdles and escaping from the fields, and running hither and thither.
In fact, there must for some time have been a perfect stampede.
Early on Sunday morning, the shepherds found the animals under hedges and in the roads,
panting as if they had been terror-stricken.
The extent of the occurrence may be judged when we mention
that every large farmer
from Wallingford on the one hand
to Twifford on the other
has reported that his sheep
were similarly frightened.
It's also noteworthy that with two or three exceptions
the hill country north of the Thames
seem to be principally affected.
We've not heard, nor can any of the farmers
give any reasonable explanation of the facts
as we have described. The night was intensely
dark with occasional flashes of lightning,
but we scarcely think the latter
circumstance would account for such a wide
spread effect.
We would suggest
the probability
of a slight
earthquake being the
cause, but perhaps
you or some
of the readers of
science gossip
may be able to
offer a more
satisfactory explanation.
Signed,
Oak Shot and Millard.
But really,
this article
continues and
basically says that
people really didn't
know what was going on.
So it kind of
talks for a bit about
the discussions,
the theories that were
put forward.
The weather
wasn't especially
bad that night, but meteorological, seismological, and even astronomical causes were immediately
discussed as the source of the night of horrified sheep.
None of these natural explanations were deemed convincing, although a number of contemporary
natural scientists were quick to point out that historically, a lot of weird stuff seemed
to drop from the sky onto Oxfordshire, particularly in November.
What?
This just, it gets wier
rather than more coherent, I'm afraid.
So it was a, this was a tough nut to crack for the skeptics
since it's hard to miss all the sheep in Oxfordshire
stampeding for no discernible reason.
That being that some people were saying
it never happened in the first place.
You know, we don't think that,
we think it's made up that the sheep panicked.
But it absolutely did happen.
and it continues for a while with no real explanation.
It talks about the shepherds of Oxfordshire were equally puzzled when the sheep went nuts again in 1893
and suffered through the same unsatisfying suggestions that seismological or meteorological events
startled their poor animals, tens of thousands of them, across a few hundred square miles.
Various causes for these panics have been suggested,
but hitherto no reasonable one has been satisfactorily adduced.
On the night of December 4th, 1893,
another very remarkable panic among sheep occurred
in the northern and middle parts of Oxfordshire.
This is according to a writer called Alpin in 1984.
Some naturally concluded they'd been worried by a dog.
Some, finding the sheep, exhibited no marks of being worried,
concluded they'd only been frightened,
perhaps only been frightened, perhaps by a dog or a fox.
Others applied to the police.
The result of any inquiries made by the police or privately
or by mentioning the fact among neighbours, however,
was to elicit the fact that the panic had been extended
over a very large tract of the country
and that unless it was allowed that all the dogs and foxes in the district
had with concerted action simultaneously arisen
and attacked hundreds of flocks on the same night.
this attempt to account for the panic would have to be abandoned.
As the Wikipedia article concluded, the closest that there is to a consensus is that it was a very dark night and the sheep got scared.
But I don't believe that.
A lot of people say, well, what about the other dark nights?
You know, why doesn't it happen a lot?
Unless this was like the first dark night with lightning
And I don't believe it
Yeah, it's very strange
So you can read more about that
That article is much longer
But I didn't want to just kind of read the whole thing
Because there's an awful lot to it
But not with any particular extra detail
It mostly just recounts
It says like what happened on the night of whatever
And then it just gives the full text of the source
and just repeats a lot of the information
that it's just written in their own words.
But there you go.
The Great Sheep Panic of 1888.
No one really knows why they all did it.
What a mystery.
I think it was Allens.
Yeah, I think it was Allens as well.
Yeah.
It's been a very shepherd-heavy few episodes, hasn't it?
I've never heard the word said so much.
Yeah.
This is the shepherd's pie.
First pie and now shepherds.
Oh, no.
That ridiculous.
But that's my thing.
A bit weird.
Weird.
Weird.
Thank you, Peter.
Thank you.
I'm curious about the other things
that fell from the sky during that time.
I know.
I just glossed over that, really.
That seems like the biggest mystery here,
not the sheep running away.
That things fell from the sky in Oxfordshire in November,
apparently, specifically.
Yeah.
Thank you very much, Peter.
You're welcome.
Would you all like another question?
Sure.
This one comes from
Jack Without the Sea
at Jack Without the Sea on Twitter
he wants to know
what's the one thing
you just don't ever want to do
is there something that's just
of no interest
no one could ever persuade you into doing it
no matter what
and you're just like nah
had enough of that
my knee jerk reaction was exercise
but
I do do it
I just don't want to do it
ever
I feel like for me
it's it's using Facebook the way it was intended
I don't think anyone could ever force me
to give life updates on it
even even I just
it's nice for all people
it's a nice way to keep up with whatever
your weird family are doing it's nice to see them
going out for meals but
I just couldn't imagine me using it in a serious manner
of like I had a lovely knot out with
I've seen you all I mean
now I'm now I'm talking
it makes you sound awful.
I'm not appreciative.
It just still like the idea of using Facebook.
You know,
there are ways you can just stay in touch with your own family
via like WhatsApp or whatever or on the phone.
You don't have to.
If you feel you don't want to use Facebook,
that's entirely your lookout, Mikey.
Yeah, I just,
I'd rather keep my online presence to crap posting on shitter.
I mean,
posting on Twitter, God.
And that's about it.
That's as far as I go.
yeah fair enough i know what yours would be based on that then it would be ticot right oh you know what
that's a very good point there were very few people telling me to do yeah there are very few people telling me
i must be on ticot but i do quite frequently because of our most recent uh higher ashton who is a youth
and down with the the children and she likes the tic tic tics today it i do have an ample opportunity at
work to sort of sigh and roll my eyes quite a lot, which I would never pass up on for sure.
When you next, do your next round of predictions, can one of, like, the next person that
comes in to replace whoever loses be a TikTok influencer, and every week they have to make
a TikTok and hope you, Ben.
Oh, God, I mean, that's a good, bad suggestion, yeah.
And it's what, oh, just imagine dancing around in front of your phone, Ben, doesn't that sound appealing?
doing trends
no it doesn't
it actually doesn't sound
appealing at all
problem is
Ashton wouldn't mind
if we did that
if she lost
she'd be like
fine
just carrying and doing
what I normally
do
no I don't think
she posts that much
but yeah
I don't understand
TikTok either
and it makes me angry
I think I'm just
an old man
I don't understand
this is how the internet
used to be
it makes me cross
can you imagine
how powerful
you would be
if you grew up
with TikTok
Mikey
oh god
the videos you used to make
would certainly
have gone
viral if they were able to take advantage of today's platforms my prime was lost on an unloving
youtube audience i know it's bullshit it's gone it's gone but we get to enjoy it post mary poppins on
tic talk yeah maybe i'll just go through and find snippets from my old videos and i'll take it off
and convince the world i'm still a young child magnificent yeah well i've had all this time
with you two giving your answers to try and think of something interesting but i'm really just stuck
I mean, I never iron anything.
If I lived alone, I would occasionally iron things when I had to, you know, I'd iron shirts if I was going to something nice and trousers and stuff and iron my chinos, because they do, you can't not iron those.
But I'm fortunate in that Amy doesn't really mind ironing.
She says, oh, I'm fine, just like I'll stick a podcast on.
like get my laptop out and put that on the bed and just watch true crime documentaries
and she'll just happily iron.
I'm fully on the same page as you.
I don't like doing it.
And I couldn't imagine doing it with something in the background.
With me, ironing is like it's a fully, like you have to really concentrate and be angry
and present in the moment to make it good.
That's why I hate it so much.
I'm so bad at it.
And even if I try, I just can't seem to get good at it.
And I just don't understand how you're supposed to iron a shirt.
I don't understand how do you do it.
It doesn't make sense.
I don't understand how you do one side
and then how you do the other side
without fucking up the first side again.
You know, that's what I struggle with.
Christ, boys.
Have you never worked in an office before
where you needed to wear a shirt and tie?
Yeah.
What the fun did you do?
What did you do?
Well, back then I was still living at home.
I think.
I mean, yeah, I've definitely,
yeah, all my shirts.
Well, I guess also there was a time
where I lived with Amy, where she would do a lot of the ironing, and then there was a time
where I didn't, and I had to start doing occasional bits of ironing again, and that's when
I really started to hate it.
Did you just start out of the fronts, and then wear a hoodie, so it could be all crumpled
at the back?
That's like peak angry Sunday evening activity.
Like, oh, shit, I've got ironed my shirts, God.
I hated that, making your lunch for the next day and also have to iron your shirt and clean your
shoes as well.
I used to get that Sunday feeling with.
Like, there would be some half-decent TV shows on a Sunday night that, like, you know, I didn't mind watching.
But they would be tinged with the, oh, it's the Sunday night show, you know?
Like, even just watching this means that it's Monday tomorrow.
Yeah, it's just like, yeah, you're watching this.
It's like, oh, this feeling is overcoming me again.
God, Megan, stop.
I even used to feel that about having a roast dinner, because we would have ours in the evening rather than at London.
lunchtime. And I think any time after about 1pm on a Sunday, you start to feel the approach of Monday.
And so we would be like sitting down to eat at like 6pm or whatever. And it's like a delicious roast dinner, but fuck, it's Monday in the morning.
This is your last bit of joy for quite a while until the weekend comes back. Oh dear. Yeah. But yeah, ironing. I absolutely hate it. I can't do it. And I'm very fortunate in that, you know, there are chores.
I like to do or don't mind doing
and there are chores that Amy doesn't mind doing
and we align pretty well
you know
you should marry
you know cover things for each other
yeah yeah it sounds like a keeper
mm-hmm
I should do
um Ben would you like to do your thing
or I can take the reins if you want
thank you for the question
Jack without the sea
I could hop in here and do my thang
yeah go on present your time
your thing thing thing here it comes
it's from
the UIjunky.com
and I'm going to tell you a little bit about
the extremely insane
Russian game show that involved
live police chase.
Oh God.
This was sold to me as GTA the television show
which it technically kind of is
so I'm going to tell you a little bit about it
and here we go.
Okay.
There are many bizarre game shows out there
but I think the Russian
The Intercept,
which is the name of the show,
The Intercept,
wins the title of the most weird one.
You see,
In this game, the contestants of the show are given a chance to steal a car.
If the thief can stay away from the cops for 35 minutes, he or she wins a new car,
the car that they've stolen, basically.
What?
The Interceptor was a Russian extreme game show popular in 1997 to 1998.
I think this has been translated this article.
It involves two players, the so-called hijackers, accompanied by their assistants, the navigators.
Each car is equipped with a low-jack vehicle tracking system that allows other vehicles to be tracked
by police. The goal of the hijackers is to avoid getting arrested for as long as possible.
The adversaries are The Hunters, driving six Ford-Crowned Victoria Police interceptors
of the Patrol Service Special Battalion, and they are leaded, it says, by a commanding officer.
The pursuit took place in the streets of Moscow. The hijackers could use any means in order to
hide from the hunters. The only forbidden thing was the violation of traffic rules. If a contestant
did violate the traffic rules, he or she was obliged to
stop for 60 seconds, which you would have thought would allow the police to catch them, but there
we are. Right. The hijackers started running from places that are known in advance, and the hunters
may start pursuing them immediately. If the hijacker is not detained in 30 minutes, he can stop
the game and pass to the next stage. If he keeps on without getting arrested for five more
minutes, he gets the car. During the second seasons, uh, the hijackers started running with their
fuel tanks practically empty. The participants had the opportunity to pick up the fuel can,
prepared specially for them at the agreed place
or to get the fuel in any other way it says
also the hijackers were allowed to take a portable radio transmitter
to eavesdrop the communications between the hunters
the show presenter comments on everything that is happening
from a studio full of supporters
and he also speaks by turn with the hijackers
and the hunters commanding officers
so this show
sounds fucking mad
and sounds like hunted
but specifically in cars
channel 4 show hunted
where it's like you're a fugitive
which is apparently massively staged
and like
they like force stuff
make them move on when they
they've actually found a really good place
to just hunker down and yeah
well it turns out that this may have been a bit staged as well
based on another article that I
read while researching this turns out that the public perception in Russia of these
of sort of the police is not good and so this show was meant to make them look amazing essentially
oh so while it was you know they were stealing a car and they had to evade the police they
practically every time they got caught right and and significant portions of
roads were like shut down and stuff like that.
So I've got some interesting facts here.
The shooting of The Intercept was always scheduled for days when the Russian road traffic
safety had their routine trainings.
In one of the editions of the show, Moscow Ring Road was blocked in order to catch the hijackers.
The hunters once had to ask the river police for help.
I don't know what the escapees were doing, but there we are.
The participants often had to try escaping in unusual ways.
They painted their cars, used railway transport, and tried to hide the car to avoid bearing.
I don't know, it says.
A very dangerous trick was shown once.
The car passed from one train to another while on the run.
At times, the presenter himself didn't know what to expect from the hijackers.
The Intercept is the first Russian show sold abroad on license.
And I would love to see it, like another, like an adaptation,
because there's almost no clips that I could find online for this.
Which is weird because you would have thought
Sounds amazing
I'd like to see the show
Making me sick
I'm dying.
Oh God, it's all too much
The excitement
Yeah, you'd think it would do well
online just on YouTube and stuff
Yeah, that's bits
With an overbearing American narrator
But he's about to make a wrong turn
He gets driven off the road
Looks like this man's run out of road
Exactly
Exactly
Let's see
In the 13th episode of The Intercept
An ordinary patrol car
That wasn't hired for the show
Started pursuing the hijacker
Oh no
What a fact
And once a real hijacker
Apparently did participate in the show
I don't know if they were successful
But there we are
A little bit of
A little sneaky look at some Russian game shows for you
They're just over there doing GTA
Why not?
Why not?
I tell you what, that was on Sunday.
I wouldn't be sad.
It was Sunday.
Oh, I still would.
I'd be like, yay!
It's the hijacking game.
It's time to watch crime.
I've got to do ironing.
Oh, no.
Amy's got to do some ironing.
There's a new show coming on,
this is not a plug or an ad,
but I'm genuinely interested.
Mikey, I don't know if you've seen this.
There's a new show coming on Channel 4.
I don't think they've done a release date yet,
called uh is it called the island or or i can't remember but it's set it's a reality tv show
and they've got like a hebridean island like a small island with a village on it and they're
doing like a island wide murder mystery where people go on in teams and i think they're work
it might be like one person and one like ex-detective or something and there's like a body
and they have to go around and, like, just speak to people on the island and work out what's happened.
It's all this big, like, staged murder that they have to solve, which sounds pretty cool.
But knowing Channel 4, who show Hunted, which is, as I say, disappointing based on the fact that it's an interesting idea, but it's massively staged, it might turn out to be rubbish, but it's an interesting idea.
Yeah, it sounds, I mean, hopefully with it being on an island, that makes it.
easy it to make because we at work we were nearly brought on to do a hundred kind of thing but
to promote a game and we spent weeks researching it and yeah the whole like hundred is so
scripted you wouldn't believe just just getting the permission to you know to go anywhere takes weeks
of work you can't just all right the running in this direction call the council call them up now
we need a commission for this road yeah but i think if they've got a whole island that's got
the potential it be magical but i my favorite thing about the the the road
Russian one was that steel a car get away while obeying road.
I know, what is that?
Very gentle little chase.
There's all sorts of like information flying around that I'm not sure what is true and what isn't.
Some articles I found mentioned that they could go and get their car like sprayed and like change how it looks or alter it how it looks.
But then it says in that article that they've got trackers in that the police can just follow anyway.
there's almost no chance you can win
I think only two people have won
and then there's a nine gag post here
which you know is always trustworthy
that says
The Intercept, a Russian game show where you have to steal a new car
evade real police for 35 minutes to get it
get caught, you go to jail
I don't think he goes to jail
I don't know it doesn't seem right
but certainly it's inspired a lot of
a lot of sort of mystery
and intrigue and you can't really find it
on the internet to watch
it but it appears in lots and lots of listicles of like the most insane game shows from
around the world but there you are the intercept which is surprisingly hard to find information
about because lots of um lots of films and other tv shows have that name so of course good luck
police interceptors love that show if we happen to have any russian listeners
go to nana's house and look through a collection of eHS tapes maybe she's got a taped episode
episode of it there amongst me.
Nana loves the intercept. She's always watching it.
Biggest fan.
Oh, thank you very much, Ben.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That was great.
Welcome.
Would you like a question?
Yes, please.
This one's coming out here, hot and fresh from Darius Owing Canning
at Darius Canning on Twitter.
You get the ability to reach into the TV
and pull out a one object displayed on screen.
What do you choose to nab?
The lamp from Aladdin, Luke's Lightsaber, Adam Sandler's click remote,
Mjolnia, Kratos, Azax, the Holy Grail, Woody slash Buzz from Toy Story, anything you can grab.
What one thing?
What would you stick on the TV and grab?
Gemma Hunt from CBBC.
Oh, God, no.
Peter.
No, that's weird.
Obviously.
Obviously, be facetious.
I mean, that's literally, you use the word object in the question.
That is the epitome of object.
but that was the quote-unquote joke and also we all know peter that human beings can't pass
through the television void because they just turn to dust in your hands it has to be no that's true
yes and they can also see you they can see you in your living room when you like wait at the
tv are aware of your presence i definitely thought that when i was about five or six i thought they
probably I thought that they
when they looked at the camera
that behind the camera
there was this wall of monitors
just showing all the kids
on their chairs
looking back at them
I eventually grew out of the idea
at maybe age seven
a considerable amount of time I thought everything
on TV was live
even the adverts
they'd be standing in the studio
I hope this goes well.
Oh, dear.
What object would I pull out of the TV?
I think it'd be food for me.
Yeah, I don't want an omnipotence from some lamp or Adam Sandler's click remote
because if I remember that movie, it made him very unhappy.
It made me a lot of the movie, so I don't want that.
I don't want any, you know, spooky shit that's going to fuck with my life.
I just want to...
Immediately before you started reading out those thoughts
or those suggestions in the question,
I was just going to say,
the first burger that pops up in an advert.
Because it's always nicer on TV than it is in real life.
Even if it's got fucking PVA glue in it
or whatever they use to make it look really cheesy.
I'll have it.
I'll have that, thanks.
They put glue on like wheatobics and stuff
to make the creamy.
Yeah, would you get it as it's made?
What is that?
What is that?
Keep me a glue.
What gives us it, it's spring.
It's bounce.
My mind went straight to steamed hams from the Simpsons, but I remember that.
They're not actually steamed hams.
They're just fucking burgers.
They're just fucking burgers.
They do look good, though.
I like how he lays it all out on a tray with the chips sort of surrounding it.
Oh, yeah.
Very fancy.
Sorry, the fries.
Man, I don't know.
My gut would be, and it's kind of a.
not a low-hanging fruit answer but maybe an obvious answer um bernard's watch was that even one
of the examples i don't know i think we've talked about like taking bernard's watch before as well
haven't we yeah but if we've talked about it but yeah no you're right it's it's a dangerous one
but thinking about it you know Bernard's watch wasn't that great like it'll be handy for literally
all it was made for in the show which is that bernard was always running late
so he would just like click the watch so he could catch the bus and stuff but
if you try to use it for like anything more sinister
I think number one that's sinister
you know if you like
burgling shops and stuff
I kind of feel like
it would it would kind of ruin your life in a way
because it would just change the way the world worked for you
so that you wouldn't appreciate anything anymore
you would just be able to go and it's like money can buy you happiness
and neither can Bernard's watch I think
yeah so yeah I also wouldn't want some sort of omnipotent
relic
but I don't know
what I would want
I think I know
what I want now
actually
I'd stick on
a grand day out
Wallace and Gromit
oh yeah
I think I'd just
take the entire
set if possible
I'd settle for just
Wallace
but I'd love to
just take the entire
set and have that
I would
oh that would make me
so happy
just put that in a
corner in
like a glass
display case
and that would be me
set for life
I don't need
anything else
I've got my
little Yorkshire
and it's a Yorkshire
of Manchester
what is he? Lancashire.
Lankishire, sorry.
Lankishamans living room.
That would bring me endless joy.
That's a great shout.
I'm actually watching at the moment the Cosgrove Hall stop motion animation of the wind in the willows.
Purely from a, I just, it's so aesthetically pleasing as a stop motion series in the same way that Wallace and Gromit is.
You know, like the cheese looks great in Wallace and Wallace and.
grommet and just the way everyone moves and stuff it's exactly the same you would probably
recognize it um cosgrove hall did loads and loads of um stop motion and then later on
actual cg animation stuff but um they they quite famously did a like a five series and two
feature film uh series of um winning the willows adaptations and yeah i'm i'm with you actually to have
a set from a very pretty
aesthetically pleasing
stop motion thing would be a great shout
so if you'll let me copy off your homework but change it a bit
so it's not obvious then that's what I would have
I'll allow you you've made a good choice thing
because it's all old Quinn British things as well isn't it
burger
burger
burger
you two would be like the supervillains in a children's movie
where suddenly Wallace and Grommett
disappears from everyone's VHS copies.
Yeah, it's just a desolate moon.
It's like, where's he gone?
And there's Michael Johnson cackling
as he slowly collects beloved childhood characters
and puts them in his museum.
He does nothing.
He just looks at them.
He's depriving us of our joy.
Yeah.
Wow, I didn't know about Cosgrove Hall.
I'm going to look into that
because it looks very, very cute.
I think they made things like Postman Pat
and stuff like that.
or maybe not specifically that,
but they've made lots of familiar stop-motion shows
from like the late 90s.
Feynman Sam?
Possibly.
I'll tell you.
I'll look it up,
but we can move on if you want
and I'll update you in a few moments' time.
Okay, lovely.
Mighty.
It's time for my thing.
I'm bringing back a slightly old game
that we've played before.
Would you all like to have a game
of guess the attraction
from the one-star trip advisor
a review.
Oh, yeah, it's a good game.
So I've got a selection of crappy reviews from attractions across the globe, and you
boys have got to figure out what the heck they're talking about from these weird, vague and
overly complainy statements.
Brilliant.
I'll just give you this list now.
Nody.
Oh, yeah.
The 90s to early noughties version that we probably familiar with.
There was one before that.
They made one in the 70s as well.
by them but that's not our one
and since then there's been another one that is not
our one um
okey doke
andrews show
um brambly hedge which i never watch
but i'm aware of um as a
name uh and then
bob the builder and the light
no way
bob the builder um and things like that
so they kind of graduated into that
kind of slightly more
um
where everything looked like it was made out of icing
You know, Bob the Builder style.
So there are various other shows that, again,
we probably wouldn't know,
that were made in the Bob the Builder style
that, yeah, that they made too.
So there you go.
And then the studio went out of business
because 3D animation.
Woo!
Yeah.
Right.
We're going to start near enough to home here
just to get us off on a relatively easy start.
Let's start with the capital of the UK, London.
I've got a couple of reviews here from the first one
The title of this one is
Gone Down Hill
Went here on the 23rd of January
To check if any birds here
Only saw two pigeons and one seagull
Flying above the area
That one is entirely impossible to guess from
I just thought it was funny
Which would become funny
But it's just throwing it in there for a bit of spice
Where would you be looking for birds in London
Hyde Park
I thought maybe Trafalgar Square
Wow
Bingo got in one
Why would you want to go find the birds
Haven't they
They've got rid of the pigeons
Haven't they? They've got rid of the pigeons
In Trafalgar Square
This was a recurring theme
There's a lot of one star of you
Citing like where's the pigeons
That's fucking weird
Who goes looking for pigeons
They're everywhere
Genuinely
It's like there's people like
Like
People like conspiracy theorists
Almost like saying
What would the government
Have done something to the pigeons
Which turns out they have
I had no idea.
I just, you know, I don't think they did anything that wild.
They've not installed some sort of, like, pigeon bomb in the square.
I think they've just, yeah, I think they've either, I don't know exactly what they've done, but hang on, I'll Google it.
Again, you can move on if you want to know.
I went to London to go see those fucked up mutant London fucking pigeons and there's none there.
It's a suggestion from Google.
Where did the pigeon, the pigeons?
Where did the pigeons go from?
What did the pigeons go from?
London's pigeon problem has a simple solution, colon, a hawk.
Oh, wow.
So now I'm going to see the really fat hawks.
Yeah.
But we know how the...
Sorry, carry on.
They stop people from feeding the pigeons.
I think they really enforce the signs everywhere saying don't feed them.
And, yeah, I think that's it, actually.
They just, oh, and they put loads of anti-roosting spikes as well on all the buildings.
So the pigeons just go somewhere else.
We know how that stuff works, though, don't we, right?
Like, if there's an abundance of hawks, again, I don't know how many hawks they've got in London,
they eat all the pigeons, then there's no pigeons for them to eat,
then the number of hawks goes down, the number of pigeons goes out.
It's just going to surely fluctuate forever, right?
No, but so it says here
Yeah, they got rid of the food
They saw people feeding the pigeons
They got rid of food cellars in the square
Oh man
But they also got the food cellars in the square
Before that
They got them to introduce birth control hormones
In the food
Which didn't work, it said
They're doing pigeon eugenics
This is awful! Oh my God
They then made it illegal to feed the birds
Inchavagos Square
They installed the spikes on surrounding buildings
And then they don't release hawks.
They get a hawkman, you know, like Tony.
Hawkehart.
Yeah, I want to get Tony Hawkman.
To come with his hawk or her hawk to fly around the square for the day.
And that kills pigeons and or scares the pigeons away.
And I don't know if they still bring the hawk in,
or if you just do it often enough for a period of time and then the pigeons go.
I've got your Trafalgar Square to watch the hawk show at this point.
It's pigeon killing day
Oh boy
Come on Timmy
Bring an umbrella
It's gonna get wet
Oh god
Yeah well well done
Ben you got in one
I'll read out the remaining two of you
I'll have in front of me
Traffic choked
Congested European Square
If you like lots of roaring buses
Spewing diesel exhaust fumes
If you like honking horns
And dreadful traffic
If you like crowds of overweight
Camera-torting ice cream
sucking tourists
This is the place for you
But get me out of
Wow. And who are you, buddy?
And the last one is, why is this an attraction at all?
This is a small patch of land located in a roundabout with a column on it,
and tourists standing around looking at each other, the traffic, question marks.
Yeah, well done, well done.
Wow. All right, we'll move on to another London attraction.
We're getting unhinged straight away on this one.
absolute dollop reads the title
If pseudoscience, fake evolution
and fake dinosaurs is your thing
then knock yourself out
from monkey man to overgrown lizards
this veritable feast of nonsense
is sure to wet the appetite of those who prefer
to be given their history
rather than researching it
the minute I walked through the door
I couldn't wait to leave
starting with quote unquote
human evolution
if you believe that used to be a fish
or whatever, then turn it to some kind of chimp,
then you are right at home in this museum.
After a couple of fake dinosaurs, I got so bored,
I'd rather catch COVID.
No such luck.
I'm surprised he believes in COVID for a start.
And also, that's the biggest.
What is a real dinosaur to this guy?
He's calling them fake dinosaurs.
Because they're not alive.
Is that the problem?
They're not currently alive, so they're fake.
Yeah, definitely.
Creationists believe the world is 6,000 years old.
and fossils of dinosaurs that are allegedly millions of years old
were put there by either fucking China or something,
I don't know, like a conspiracy,
or they were actually put there by God to test our faith.
Yeah.
If you want to believe that, that's fine, but I'm just saying, I don't.
I'm going to put my foot down.
You're a fucking idiot.
Oh, God.
This, I usually, like, I mean, there's a few in here,
like in this thing, there's a few that are definitely kind of baity and purposefully bad.
But this is from someone who's made 3,829 contributions to TripAdvisor.
So it has so many.
What is a creationist doing, even attempting to go into what I'm assuming is the Natural History Museum?
Boom, bum, bum, bum.
What do you expect from that?
Everyone knows that you walk through that door.
And depending on when this was posted, the original big, like, you know,
The big wow factor when you walk through the door was Dippy, the diplodocus.
Like it was the whole point of the central room in the Natural History Museum was a giant dinosaur skeleton.
It's now a blue whale, but what do you expect?
I don't know.
I'm Derek Horse hater, and I've had a terrible time at the Grand National.
Rubbish. One star, don't go.
well in a similar
I think Derek Orsator would like
the Grand National
because quite frequently
You can't wait for the foot of the horse curtain
I'm Derek Orsater
Had a great time
Brought my own gun
Oh dear
That's fantastic
One star they escorted me out
Because I brought my own gun
In a similar vein
Then one more of you
For the museum is
Full of Died Animal
Not for vegan
You can't enjoy looking at stoofed
Died Animals
Full of Died Animals
Full of Died Animals
I know.
Stoved.
Stoved.
I love that.
That's great.
Oh, God.
Right.
I'm sure most of them died of natural court.
Well,
I don't know.
Some of the older ones probably were definitely shot by, quote, unquote, explorers.
Yes, there's some old boys who paid a lot on to go out hunting.
Yes.
Fantastic.
All right, let's get the ferry across the river.
The river?
The, what is it?
The port?
What?
The channel.
That's it.
Jesus.
The river.
The small sea.
Yeah.
The big stream.
The Leigh.
Oh, that's embarrassing.
Sorry.
Oh, dear.
The France water.
Yeah, let's jump over the small pond to France and breathe in some culture.
You start with, this is the title.
Triangle Heller-Suss.
The Louvre?
Lufre.
The big glass sus triangle.
Immediately, this has got, some of these have got to be joke reviews, right?
You can't call the triangle, hellers.
us.
This one definitely is, but I liked it too much to not include it.
Apparently, this is an art gallery.
Don't be fooled.
And another one for the Louvre is, is it Louvre or Louvre?
Do you send it in French?
You want to go with it, really.
Bonjour.
The Louvre.
The Louvre.
The Louvre.
Le Louvre.
Le Louvre.
The other review was, you would have got this straight away.
Anyway, just a big glass pyramid.
It's just a pyramid with a bunch of paintings.
I'm really sorry, but just can't accept that this is worth my time.
I can't accept it.
Did they go inside
or did they just get there
and go, where the fuck's the Mona Lisa?
It gives a horrible view of the paintings.
Couldn't see it.
I don't know what they're expecting
from an art gallery, but...
I know.
These people, like,
they just go to somewhere
that has a five-star review,
not checking what it is.
And when they get there, they're like,
oh, it's a fucking train museum.
I wanted football.
And you know these people have like
flown to this country
as well. This is at once,
potentially once in a lifetime opportunity to see
some stuff they would never normally see.
It's like, yeah, shit triangle.
Why, I'm struggling to
understand why this is worth my time.
It's just some paintings.
It's just some fucking paintings.
All right,
move on to the next attraction
in merry old France.
It's,
well, it's spelled itted big,
but it's big, but
me, I mean, except for the
My chance of you seeing an accident, the place is packed and uninteresting.
That one doesn't reveal too much the chance of seeing an accident.
An accident threw me off.
I thought it was going to be the Eiffel Tower, but hopefully there aren't many accidents there.
No, God, no.
Chance of seeing an accident.
Oh, could it be some kind of driving place?
Kind of, yeah.
Do you want me to read the next one, see if you get any closer?
Sure.
This one's titled simply bricks
Nice bricks
Yeah, bingo
Because it's on a roundabout
I always see because of the roundabout right
Bricks
Nice bricks
Bricks
Nice bricks but nothing really to see
A purest might enjoy looking at the cement
And perhaps the design
But after 20 to 30 seconds
You might start counting the number of cars driving by
Or looking at the more interesting pigeons
And then the cement get billing
Above the design
Imagine seeing a monument and going
Some nice bricks, that.
Just some bricks in it.
That's a very aesthetically pleasing
assembling of bricks.
A rainbow of bricks.
Some nice bricks there.
And the last one.
The last one is disappointed.
You can't argue the history of this place.
However, it's just a glorified roundabout
surrounded by angry, ignorant French people.
Ignorant.
Ignorant.
I think by definition, the tourist,
complaining that French people are at the Ark of the Triumph is the ignorant one.
Sure.
Yes, probably.
Yeah.
All right.
We're staying in Italy.
Shit.
We're not staying in Italy.
We're going to Italy.
There we go.
We're going on a little sightseeing to.
Failed construction.
I don't think I need to say anything more than that for Italy, but I'll keep going.
Right.
In a few words, by marketing this smartly, people are realizing the money invested on this failed
architecture.
Agreed.
It's an iconic location
and kind of a must see
but that's all
because of the publicity
and nothing else.
I've built a garage
at the bottom of my garden
that's leaning over
while people flock into my house.
That's basically the attitude there.
Yeah.
Wow.
Well, yeah, you got it.
It is the Leaning Tower of Pisa.
But Leaning Tower of Pisa
was built to be intentionally leaning.
It wasn't an accident, was it?
I mean, it's starting to lean more and more every year.
They keep...
I thought it was an accident.
Take preventative measures
to stop it from
leaning too far, so I don't know.
I thought it was an accident.
I thought it started to lean, but I don't know.
I've just always assumed that.
I'm not sure.
For some reason, yeah, I thought maybe, okay,
I'll look into that another day.
This isn't the leading to Harry Pizza podcast.
That's for my own time from zero stars.
I didn't even have any,
wasn't even fucking pizza there.
Rubbish.
Not straight.
Oh, God.
Can't even boo you like.
It's not leaning that much.
I'm standing around with their hands in the air.
I find just 10 people and none of them
are happy about it
I like those photos that people take
of the people at the Leaning Tower of Pisa
I don't think there's anything original
you can take a photo of there now is there
like everything's been done like just even like
going back to taking pictures of the people taking pictures
I want to see someone go and reinvent the game
just do something really outlandish
well a lot of people have done the Leaning Tower of Pisa
is my dick one
oh good yeah
I saw one recently where someone had put it in their
yeah that's the one I was about to say
yeah the backpack one I want to do it
I want to go to these famous landmarks
where you do these things
but I'm like the photo
is purposefully taken where I'm about
a foot away from it so it doesn't
like it doesn't line up
I did see a photo of someone
doing that pose next to the Coliseum
in Rome which is
great
I enjoy that
a couple more reviews
it just looks silly
imagine a magician with just one trick
or a TV with only one channel
if you find this exciting and worth a trip
then go see the poorly built building
these people are just soulless
I'm not saying it's amazing
well it's actually pretty amazing
that it's still going but I mean
you know I'm not saying it's the greatest
building in the world but
fuck me just lighten up
you know everything's every building
cowed and strighting proopoly.
We're going way over to the far east for this one.
Oh dear.
Right.
We're in China.
I could only find one suitable review for this one.
It's not even forbidden.
It's exposed to everyone.
So tired.
I know we have to walk a long time, but it's big.
And I can't think of a single nice thing about it.
It's not even forbidden.
That's a big, big, big, big hint on what it could be.
This is a trickier one because I guess,
so it's not as used to...
It's not a wall then.
Oh, right.
If that's a big hint, then yeah, it's not the wall.
But that also, you have to walk for a while to,
for this one, this was a recurring theme of like just because it was so big,
you had to walk like 45 minutes to properly, like, see it all.
And people were upset about that.
And that was like 50% the reviews were complaining about that.
I won't be upset if you don't get this one.
I just thought that review was quite funny.
Well, when you know what it is.
I'm genuinely drawing a blank.
I'm not sure that it could be.
Yeah, me too.
The Forbidden City in China.
I think Beijing.
Can't say I've heard of that, actually.
I think it's famous, but it's not like a standout thing.
I think when you see a picture, it'd be like, oh, that.
Oh, is it the big sort of massive greenery right in the middle of the city or something?
something. Yeah. Yeah, that thing. Not greenery. It's just, it's just a big city that was built a long time ago, but it's entirely walled off.
Oh, yeah. Yeah, I've seen this. So you have to walk a long time to get there, or are they complaining that you have to walk a long time to get around it and see it?
I think, yeah, get around it. Because I think most often you're not allowed into the city. So you have to go on the, like, the wall around the outside.
Right. I don't think I'd particularly enjoy walking all the way around a wall. But I could, I would say,
certainly go to the front of it.
Yeah.
Imposing.
I wouldn't leave a one-star review after the fact,
and that's what separates us from the hip.
All right.
Let's take a flight to the United States of America,
in particular, the East Coast, New York,
filled with many, many a famous landmark.
We start with this first spot.
Upsetting, reads the title.
We went there with a pass that got us in,
and I wished I had not gone, gone.
It was so upsetting.
This was my least favorite.
Is that ground zero?
Yeah.
Oh, Christ.
I mean, yes, but.
Yeah, it's kind of sort of the point of going.
You need to know what you're going in for.
Yeah, I've been there myself.
It's very emotional.
It's a weird atmosphere to it.
It's like really, really touching.
But then, I mean, to go there not to expect.
to be upset by it
is slightly weird
and to then
leave a one-star review
of a one year
another review
was sad
I was overwhelmed by this
it was not terrible
I felt terrible
as I did not know
this would make me so emotional
and so
dear bless
bless me
that's like
that's essentially
a five-star review
because it's done
his job
it seems to be
point no one like
you don't go to
places like
you know you don't go
to museums of
you know
like tragedy
and you know
like war crimes
and things like
yeah like 9-11
and
you don't leave a five-star review
because you had a great time
you leave a five-star review
because it was poignant
and thought-provoking
dear
dearie me
and this is our last
of the
last attraction of the brunch
the brunch
Jesus Michael your word
to flop it out your mouth
hold on have I got one that's slightly less revealing than that
nope they're all pretty revealing so let's
I love the Grand Canyon it was fantastic
title of this one is why is she green
fucking out
out of all the colours the person who created this beautiful lady
could have chosen why did they go for green
did they make the statue of liberty green
I'm going to Google whether she was originally
I think it was iron or something
it's oxidised because it's like oxidised
there's a lot of rooftops in Oxford that are green
because they haven't changed colour over the years
yeah it was apparently red
before it was green it was like copper
coppery red
oh well like the angel of the north
yeah and it's oxidised
a few more reviews for this one
Again, abhorrent color.
We recently visited this establishment
and we were appalled by the color.
It was mankie and the smell was trampy.
How are you surprised by the color by the time you get there?
Have you never seen a photo?
It's a big green, isn't it?
God, somebody needs to give it a clean.
And the last one, nothing special.
It's just a statue in the middle of the water.
Not as big as we thought.
It's also very expensive to go near.
Yeah.
to go near
oh dear
it wasn't worth the money really
thanks juan jay from new mould in UK
oh wow
not as big as we thought
oh dear
you know just a statue in the middle of water
isn't it that's what it is
shit isn't it
I mean when you look at things like that
nothing's impressive
oh it's just a building
yeah it's just some triangles
in the middle of desert
I don't understand
it's not very nice colour
I don't like green no one likes green
why they make a green
great pyramid of the geese
just bricks
just bricks
Just bricks, isn't it?
I might be interested in the cement, possibly the design.
It's just bricks.
It's not even that big.
Why is it orange?
There was a few complaining about the, what's it called?
The Golden Gate Bridge was a potential one,
and there was several of you who was complaining about the colour,
either it not being as orange as they hoped,
or it wasn't actually gold, and they're upset about that.
Yeah.
That was.
It's just, yeah.
We've done enough touring of the world,
thoroughly feel broken down by these individuals.
Wow.
Thank you for joining me.
Is that all our questions and our things?
I think it is.
I think we've hit an hour and a half with a meaty bit of bamzuki.
So let's pull it some chunky bams.
Excellent.
Thank you so much for listening, everybody.
Who would like to know what's coming out on the Vidiot's YouTube channel three years ago?
They would.
They would.
You're not asked, Peter?
you don't really care
I do too
but I think they care
even more
okay that's a nice safe
alright
here we go
we've got
worst games ever
America's 10 most wanted
personal dick rocket
the sex Olympics
game
for a featuring booth
thanks booth
Peter gets hit by a car
again
Art Attack PC
oh
that was the animation
we made
that was a good
and I like that
Vidiot's live
Twitch stream
eggs for barked
and fatal frame
I think that was Mikey and I
were doing the spooky stream.
Yeah, someone was asking me about eggs for Bart
the other day when I was streaming
Simpsons hit and run and I was like,
I do not remember that.
Yeah.
Which is loud.
Very rubbish.
Post-sum tat number 34,
happy birthday, Mikey.
It's his birthday.
Wish him a happy birthday.
When I got my favorite
the best post-sum tat ever
with the non-vegan king.
Yeah, we really thought that three didn't
we do it spectacular
Marvel Spider-Man
upside-down
challenge
that was a piece of cake
episode where I think
I had a cold
and I was laying off
the sofa upside down
and I had to play Spider-Man
got we clutched at straws
with that episode didn't we
you were not well
that day
horrible time
worst games ever
Bad Boys 2
nice
rubbish games
Bonanza
ZX Spectrum
that's another
that's a booth
it's another booth special
video
it's live
Twitch stream
Swamp Sim
Luigi's Mansion
And something else
We were all there for that
That was another
Spooktober stream even
Fighting Women
WWE2K19
VDIETS live
Dark Souls remastered number three
I'm going to skip the Vidiats live stuff
Because we get quite a few
Quite a few of those vods now in here
Potty is episode 17
Great stuff
Postum tat number 35
Golden Bat Buddha
Oh, yeah
Oh my God, yeah
That's bringing back to one of two people
Yeah, we did
Medieval ruling
Age of Empires 2 part one
This is the beginning of a prove it
A medieval themed to prove it
This was the first part of the let's play
And finally
We had worst games ever
All Star Water Sports
Which is nowhere near as sexy
As it sounds actually
No, it was a bad game
It was not good
A quick reminder that next episode will technically be our Halloween episode.
So it will be made clear in the question post that it should be spook-themed questions,
but that will be our spooky podcast.
It will be the spook one.
So please be excited for that.
Mikey, there's some kind of shop, isn't there?
I think you're ringing some bells.
Oh, yeah, you're right.
You are right.
If you head over to store.
you'll find a wonderful selection of yogscast related goodies
and we've even managed to sneak in our own little corner on that website
which they haven't noticed we're still on there
so nobody tell them nobody tell them we're still part of the network
we are we are please don't tell them though please don't tell them
well maybe every time you buy a t-shirt they make money oh my god
remember we're here and they'll kick us out
well if you want to see us booted from the yogs cast why don't you go
Buy a shirt.
We've got a lovely selection of t-shirts,
mugs, and hoodie for you to wear and or use,
depending on the article.
And if you feel like saving a little bit of money,
you can use code vidiates at checkout for 10% off absolutely everything on the Yogscast store.
Not just our stuff.
That works on everything,
including a hoodie.
Yeah, with the reference I'm not sure about on it.
And some T-T-T-T shirts.
T-T-T-T-T-T-T-shirts of
best of all, you can use it on our stuff
and you get a nice little bit of money off
and a little bit of little few coins go to us
which would be lovely.
That's called Vidyots at checkout.
God, my store commercials
are getting rope here every week.
I need to horn them in.
It's a good store, go and buy our things.
Thank you.
Yes, thank you.
YouTube, Twitter, Facebook,
all.com, forward slash
Vidiotts official.
Vyatio.
Vyatts official.
Yes, this is the time.
this is the time is it
hang on let me check
what's the time
it's going out
when does this episode go out
the fifth
yes
okay
yeah next Tuesday
the fifth
right on Sunday
I'm going to be doing
a live stream
so I hope to see people there
will be raising some money
for charities
so do come along
Twitch.tv
forward slash video it's official
there we are
dates are difficult
when we record things in advance
I forget where things are
streamlups.com
forward slash potty
It's donations, three pounds or more to get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show.
Thank you so much to everybody who has joined Pod Squad this week.
Once again, Mikey kick us off.
These absolute legends, Mr. Black.
Wendy Miller, Trunter from the Lothian area, an insignificant donation.
Oaky, that's their name.
Sorry, I should have clarified that first time.
That's not me ripping into someone.
That's their name.
Oh, no, that's an insignificant donation.
Okie doaks, spoky doca, raindrop joy, the very generous Samuel de Barber,
DBP, Simp Squad, Lord Brotovich, Pro Trainer, I can't believe you've done this, RIPP,
Shepard Pie, Made of Man, sorry, Made of Shepherd.
God, Michael, get your head in the game.
Shepherd Pie, Made of Shepherd. There we go.
Keith Cuntwin, the generous DeLuxington, man or woman.
Alfa
Alpha serpent
There we go
Thanks
Got it
Rejected Pottie
Its names
Carr gets hit
By a Peter
And Pingu's
Gay Dad
Cheers
Cheers you lot
Also
I needed this
Thank you
Specky Becky
Stucalicious
Ben looks like
He smells nice
Bartek
and Chucky
Bin La doll
The very generous
Ami
Hang on
Ami
Ami do
Sange, one vowel from Shira, who was also very generous. Michael Cheggson-Yare. Mikey's
roller-scatting event. Stephen Skodes. Slap him with bumpus. Ashton in a croppedop-top shock.
Deep Heat D.P. With D.B.P. Dick in the bumgolo. Fuckable Yakult. Finn Tristam. Pubeless
Peter. And I sneezed. Oh shit. Literally.
Also, I have absolutely no idea if it is Ami Dosanj, but it sounds right.
And I feel like that's what we called them previously.
Yeah, I think you were, or you or one of us was corrected at one point,
and then we knew that it was supposed to be Ami DeSanche.
Let us know if we got it wrong.
Keep forgetting.
Let us know.
Also, we have Caroline.
My lawyer will call you.
Please, Peter, it's a hot pot.
Patrick, you flippin' idiot.
Mikey Corleone.
Clue wouldn't download a house.
Mr. Macker.
Just keep swimming, Ash.
shitler's greasy ring fush unshops beans motherfucker a good toad in my hole puma pants
prince beef cakes the extremely generous gregoor monkey and monkey chippy that's it jeremy beadle wank
challenge mike light or is uh caroline where is shedkey and a succulent chinese mitch there we are
thank you so much everyone who joined pod squad this week remember streamlabs dot com forward slash poddy
donations, spooky questions for next time.
Mikey, where can people find you on the internet?
At Paraboy on Twitter.
Best place to keep up with all my shenanigans.
You can watch me drunk saying poggers.
I think I said that last time.
That's still the highlight.
Poggers.
Pogers.
Absolutely, that's poggers, that is.
And on Twitch, when I stream occasionally,
I think now the weather's starting to get crapper.
I'll start streaming again soon.
I promise.
I'm sorry.
I don't stream.
that often.
Ah, thank you.
My God, Johnson.
Peter, where can we be found?
We can be found together at Team Triple Jump on social media, but also on YouTube and
Twitch, where we are making videos and doing live streams all the flippin' time.
But also separately, we are at That Peter Austin on Twitter and at Confused underscore
Dude on Twitter.
No.
Why not leave us an iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice.
It helps something to do with Al Gore's rhythms.
Thank you so much, everybody, for listening and supporting us.
We really, really super-duper appreciate you.
You're all lovely and wonderful, and we love you, quite frankly.
And if we could marry you, we would, but we can't.
So there are laws, I think.
Do we have a final question?
I said, do we have a final question?
I will hear no more on the legality of marrying everyone.
Will you marry me is my question to everybody.
Why did they make the words the monkey?
remember years ago
if a monkey could talk
what would it sound like
said,
will you marry me?
Will you marry me?
Will you marry me?
Fucking.
Why choose that phrase?
That's the question.
Why did,
when they artificially created
monkey speech
using science,
why did it say,
will you marry me?
Will you marry me?
For those who don't know what that is,
that's really a confusing way
to end the podcast.
I'll just Google it.
I'll stick in the audio clip here at the end.
It's not even Halloween.
I enjoy that.
Scarring.
It was like, it was just for context as to why they did it and why it matters.
It was based on the science of like the makeup of a monkey's throat and mouth.
It was, they were able to create a fake voice based on that information.
It wasn't like that they used a real biological.
head. They did it
with a computer and that's why
it was amazing at the time because
they'd made a believable voice
out of just
information.
Just the worst.
So that was, that's why they did it.
Will you marry Peter? That's the question
that we're meeting you with. So do let
us know and look after
yourselves. We'll catch you in a couple of weeks.
Goodbye everybody.
Goodbye.
Bye.
You know,
I'm gonna,
you know,
and a
no
and
Thank you.