Podiots - Podiots: Episode 87 - Comic Demise

Episode Date: October 5, 2021

Peter's feeling a little sheepish, Mikey has a terrible holiday and Ben is running from the police Donate £3 or more to get a shoutout and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/podiotsdonat...ions/   New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord:  http://bit.ly/VidiotsDiscord   Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Starting point is 00:00:30 event. Conditions supply, visit your local Volvo retailer or go to explorevolvo.com. Maybe it's Mabelaine is such an iconic piece of music. Hit the track. Everyone in the studio that I worked on this jingle with all had like childhood stories or memories around either watching these commercials on TV or sitting with our moms while they were doing their makeup and it became really personal for us. Maybe it's Maybe it's Maple Lane. Right.
Starting point is 00:01:07 So, Dave Benson Phillips has an eBay account. He does, which he tweets about. He does just tweet things that he's trying to sell. Good technique. Good technique. I like it. They don't get out to a wide audience. And we know it's definitely, definitely his,
Starting point is 00:01:23 not only because he tweets out things he's trying to sell, but also because one of the things that he's selling was a badge with his face on it which one of our colleagues at Triple Jump bought and it arrived was it today that it arrived Peter? Yeah I believe so I think it cost two pounds the final price it went for
Starting point is 00:01:47 I think it was a you could buy that one now there are other things you can't buy now you have to bid on them and the postage was three pounds so it cost more to post But it came with even better Its value was even higher than that Because when it arrived
Starting point is 00:02:03 It had a handwritten note By Dave Benson Phillips himself Wow Something along the lines of Best wishes, Kieran Love Dave Benson Phillips Imagine buying that Not knowing you're buying it from
Starting point is 00:02:18 actual Dave Benson Phillips That's what we were saying Earlier on actually About the thing we're going to discuss in a second is that imagine if this thing arrived and you were just looking for one of these weird things that Dave happens to be selling and it's just got a note from some guy
Starting point is 00:02:34 called Dave Benson Phillips in the package. I think for full context we should say Yeah, what is the mystery item? Well, he happens to be selling a toilet seat. Two toilet seats actually. Two toilet seats. One is sealed and the one that we are currently bidding on I will read the description here.
Starting point is 00:02:54 Please do. Please note, this seat has had some considerable use. Oh, God. It's been thoroughly cleaned, anti-backed to within an inch of its life and is now ready for use on any toilets with the Carrara and Mata seat fittings already in place. So obviously we saw that Dave Benson Phillips is selling one of his used toilet seats and we thought, how could we not buy that?
Starting point is 00:03:20 It's also not just a regular toilet seat. It's a sort of musical notes and keyboard printed toilet seat. It's not your average white lid. It is very much patterned. It's special. But it's like a coffee stain rugged texture, so it looks well used, but it's actually just the print. It's very special indeed. I don't even want to add it to the link dump or like, not the link dump, the photo thread,
Starting point is 00:03:48 because I don't want people to know that we're aware of it. No. Because he's tweeted this out before. There are currently, there's currently 16 and a half hours left on it. We're the highest bidder. So by the time this episode comes out, we will know one way or the other whether or not we have won this toilet seat. However, if we make it known to the vidiates and poddiet's viewer and listenership that we are pursuing this loose seat. By posting it in the thread before the thing is closed, then, uh,
Starting point is 00:04:22 people might try and snipe it fast. He's also selling a yellow wooden children's bed, which says well used, but not for a while. Oh, no, that's sad. It's a collection of the weirdest stuff. It is. It is. It is the weirdest, imaginable stuff. It's toilet seats, children's bread, children's beds, children's beds, and VHS tapes.
Starting point is 00:04:46 And old VHS tapes. Dave does not know how eBay works quite clearly. Not only is it evident in the fact that that tiny shit badge cost more to post than it did to buy when it's a tiny little badge, but also this toilet seat, it's a bidding only thing. You can't buy it now, but you can make an offer on it. And I made three consecutive offers. You can only make three and then you can't make any more. And each of them was automatically declined. Because he's put a reserve on it for God knows what.
Starting point is 00:05:21 He thinks this seat is worth at least more than 25 pounds, which is the maximum offer that we made in the end. However, as it stands, it's going to go for significantly less than the very first offer that we made on it. So he just doesn't know, it just doesn't know how eBay works, I don't think. Ben and I have had this, well, we've talked about this on several occasions over the past week or so, but I will just repeat for the benefit of the podcast, I love that not only are we bidding on anything from Dave Benson-Philip's eBay account,
Starting point is 00:05:57 but it's literally a used toilet seat. Like, you couldn't write it. If someone wrote that into the poddy it's sitcom, everyone watching at home would be like, yeah, but that's a bit, you know, it's a bit much that it's a toilet. That wouldn't happen, would it? You know, maybe a VHS. It's the most Dave Benson Phillips thing you could possibly hope to bid on. His used toilet seat is that he sat on with his...
Starting point is 00:06:21 naked ass He has tweeted this It's had thorough use Considerable Considerable Use has had some considerable use Now because he's tweeted it It is quite clearly
Starting point is 00:06:34 Public knowledge that Dave is the one Who's selling this So When we win Because I'm trying to be confident About this When we win I'm going to ask him
Starting point is 00:06:45 If he'll sign the toilet seat Even if he doesn't we will sign the toilet seat and then our plan is to auction it off for charity. Yeah, we will do. Now you two can own a slightly pissy toilet seat.
Starting point is 00:06:59 If you would like to own Dave Benson Phillips used toilet seat and support a worthwhile cause which we have not chosen yet. Signed by the poddiots. Signed by all three of us and maybe Dave
Starting point is 00:07:12 then hopefully, wow. Then please stay tuned because we'll have more for you. It's just the most insidious way we could have done it. It's the most potty it's way we could have done it by if he does sign it. And even if, actually, even if he doesn't sign it, we've had to pretend with someone else to buy his toilet seat. It's like David's given it to us. It's not like with his blessing that we're selling this for charity. We've just taken it from him. Do you think when you win,
Starting point is 00:07:39 he'll be like, Penn Potter, I know that name. Why do I know that name? Well, and he just stops it from happening. Oh, I've thought ahead. I've thought ahead. You made a burner account. No, no I'm going to get it sent to the office next door where Coltaholic are based and I'm going to get it sent to Andrew My name is nowhere near it Does he know this is coming
Starting point is 00:08:00 And she does leave us I will warn him when we win No, don't He doesn't need No, he doesn't get a used toilet seat in the post Okay But I'm going to let some other people He works next to know
Starting point is 00:08:11 So when it arrives they can tell him One of my favourite things about this as well is that among the VHS tapes he's selling, of which there are two or three, one of them is a copy of A Bridge Too Far, which is, you know, not a very nice war movie, and included in the listing, he's just written, movie trivia.
Starting point is 00:08:32 The screenplay was written by William Goldman, who also wrote the screenplays, Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, all the president's men, and he also wrote, and his cult novel and screenplay, The Princess Bride. Thanks, Dave.
Starting point is 00:08:46 I go, that's what I go to eBay for. It's movie trivia. In the toilet seat listing, it has a hashtag, it just says hashtag neat toilet seat. Oh, hopefully. I did look for videos of the toilet seat on Twitter, but he didn't have put one up of it, sadly. That's a shame. Show us it in action. Anyway, we'll keep you posted.
Starting point is 00:09:06 Hopefully, we've won Dave Benson Phillips' toilet seat. But we're going to wait until it arrives before we celebrate, because anything could go wrong. It could be all manner of videos. waiting to snipe at the very end of that listing. I've already had to outbid someone else. Yeah, someone has already bid on it, so... Yeah, we're on seven... Just
Starting point is 00:09:26 for context, we're on £7.50 currently. For this toilet seat, the Dave Benson Phillips thinks is worth more than 25 pounds, apparently. It's just... It just never ends. It's just like with the postage as well.
Starting point is 00:09:42 He's not... He's not put a price down. It's just how much ever... how much ever it costs for him to sort it out. So you could end up paying through the ass for the postage on this. Delivery varies. We looked into his feedback. And he's had at least two people cancel orders from him before because basically he lied about the shipping.
Starting point is 00:10:02 And it said the posting would be so much, postage sorry, would be so much on the listing. And then he's gone, actually, it's going to cost more, which isn't how eBay works. And then the person's gone, no, I'm not going to fuck off. I'm not going to pay that. Get there on the apprentice. He's a modern day business man. He knows that I get money. He said negative feedback as a result.
Starting point is 00:10:19 I do like the thing you found, though. Yeah, Mike, I was going to say you've looked at the feedback he's given to other people, haven't you? Oh, which one? Oh, God. Have you gotten in front of you? It's in our WhatsApp, isn't it? Yeah, it is in our WhatsApp. I can see it.
Starting point is 00:10:33 The negative feedback he gave to somebody. Just, yeah. This was quite an old one as well. But yeah, just left feedback. They're great slippers. Negative. imagine receiving that Dave you press the wrong button
Starting point is 00:10:49 Dave Great slippers One star He's literally God he's a living meme From start to finish And again I want to make it really clear
Starting point is 00:10:59 That we love Dave We do We don't want to We don't want to leave him out of it Because he's an endless source of amusement But we don't We don't want to like We're not being nasty to him
Starting point is 00:11:08 We don't want to be mean We just he's just entertaining And we hope that if it ever gets back to him that we've continued to not leave him out of it. It's because we just love his online antics, like so much. We do. And he was a formative part of our childhoods as well. He was.
Starting point is 00:11:25 And he's selling two toilet seats on these. Dave, if you want to be left out of it, you've got to stop doing this shit, man. You've got to stop. Why are you selling two toilet seats? What is fucking used? Nobody wants to buy this. Only we want to because it's funny. It's not worth 25 pounds, Dave.
Starting point is 00:11:43 Oh, God. Can we please start the podcast? Yeah, we should. This has gone on long enough. Hello, everybody, and welcome to Poddietz, the official. Vidiates podcast. It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us, where everybody brings a thing along to talk about. I'm Ben
Starting point is 00:12:15 I'm Peter And I'm Michael Hey guys How are we doing Very good Doing fantastic How are you Ben I'm okay
Starting point is 00:12:25 Good Good Yeah Yeah I'm not now You know Why I was
Starting point is 00:12:35 But that was really Oh that was horrid Both of you Why didn't you like about it Oh I don't know It just reminds me of Like grandma Grandma.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Pizza comments. Come, this one, Grandma's love. Oh, Brickis. Well, we did spend a lot of time talking about Dave Benson Phillips, so I suppose we can just move straight on to Pod Squad, can we? We can. Let's do it. Let's move straight onto Pod Squad. Do you know you can support us financially?
Starting point is 00:13:01 Well, you can. You'd be magnificent. You join Pod Squad. You get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show. And you can do that by going to Streamlabs.com forward slash Podiot's donations and donating three pounds or more to get a shout. Mikey has the first group of shoutouts now in front of him. So, yeah, these people are directly funding used toilet seat purchases.
Starting point is 00:13:23 Genuinely, actually are, yeah. We start with Mr. Black, Wendy Miller, Trunter from the Lothian area, an insignificant donation, oaky-dokey-doky-doky-doker, raindrop joy the incredibly generous Samuel de Barber it has been a while since I've done a donate
Starting point is 00:13:47 but now with the degree done and just the wait for results I thought this was a good opportunity so have some monies you lovely lads thank you thank you congratulations on finishing good luck with your results
Starting point is 00:14:02 on the degree yeah I'm sure you've smashed it thank you yeah DBP Simp Squad Damn right represented Full Force tonight Lord Brottovich
Starting point is 00:14:12 The Simps Squad Lord Brotovitch Pro Traynor I'm not going to do it all in the Simpsons That'd be awful Pro Trainer Sorry let me just do Lord Broovitches again Because I feel like he's been tranced over
Starting point is 00:14:26 By the Simpsons in personation Lord Brotovitch Lord Brotovitch Pro Trainer I can't believe you've done this RIP. Have you heard about this? What? What?
Starting point is 00:14:38 I can't believe believe you've done this. The original video has been taken down from YouTube. Oh, I thought you were going to say he's done. God, I thought you were going to say that as well. Why has the original been taking, just the uploader has taken it down? No, YouTube's took it down for inciting violence or something. Oh, come on. That fucking algorithm, man.
Starting point is 00:14:54 God's sake. Rest and peace to a real one. Can't wait until Pierre gets it by a car gets taken down, so watch it while you can. Oh, man, yes, they say. Insighting violence. God. I had, yeah, I had some old videos removed as well because it had some explosions and stuff, I know, me as a
Starting point is 00:15:10 kid, so yeah, thanks, YouTube. Jesus. Shepard pie made of shepherd. Oh, Keith Cuntwin, the generous, Deluxington, man or woman, chaps, or chappesses, or others,
Starting point is 00:15:26 here's the money I justly owe. Also, if Caroline is single, does she fancy going on a date? Praise be to the mighty meat face. How do you think about that? Hopefully we'll hear from Caroline. I don't know if we will, actually. I don't know.
Starting point is 00:15:40 She sounds like trouble, Caroline. It's been a messy breakup. Yeah. Better leave her out of it. Ah, what is this word? Alpha serpent. There we go. Got it.
Starting point is 00:15:50 Alpha serpent. Rejected Podiot's names. Carr gets hit by a Peter and Pingu's gay dad. Thank you all. I wasn't reading along and I was just waiting here where that last one would go. Pingu's. gay dad and
Starting point is 00:16:11 this week in the tiny troop we've got I needed this thank you specky becky Becky Stucalicious Ben looks like he smells nice
Starting point is 00:16:20 Bartek and Chunky O'Chucky Bin La Doll yeah from last week last episode we've got the very generous
Starting point is 00:16:31 Amy D'E Ami is it Ami oh yeah I remember this his name Ami Sange.
Starting point is 00:16:37 I haven't been able to donate since having a baby, but wanted to show my appreciation for how wonderful you all are and for being the best boys. The little man is 14 months now, and your dulcet tones have been there throughout. So thanks, Ami, Katie, and Thomas. Oh, congratulations. So it's been that, I mean, because that's the name I remember, but it's apparently been 14 months since a donation, which is troubling. I think talking about it in a previous donation.
Starting point is 00:17:06 a previous pod squad. Oh, God, the history that's held in these donations amongst the word cunt. Another name here I've not seen in a while. They're very generous, one vowel from Shira, who says, it's not generous, just overdue. Much love to you guys and the walrus clan. It's a real get, it's like friends reunited this this week, isn't it? We just need to hear from Chav Chavramar is. We do, yeah.
Starting point is 00:17:33 We've got Michael Cheggson, yeah. Mikey's roller scatting event Oh no Stephen Scodes Slap him with bum piss Ashton Ashton In a crop top shock
Starting point is 00:17:48 Oh there you go I saw the word Nina in there Ashton in a crop top shock Deep Heat DP with DBP Dick in the bungalow Sorry Fuckable Yakult Oh, Finn Tristam, pubeless, Peter, and I sneezed, oh shit, literally.
Starting point is 00:18:11 Oh, no. We've also got, oh, here it is. Caroline, my lawyer, will call you. Please, Peter, it's a hot pot. Patrick, you flip-en idiot. Michael Corleone. Clue wouldn't download a house. Mr. Macca.
Starting point is 00:18:30 Just keep swimming, Ash. shitler's greasy ring Fush and Shups Beans motherfucker A good toad in my hole Puma Pants Which I think only works If you're American
Starting point is 00:18:44 Because it's actually Puma Puma Pumor Pants Prince Beefcakes Gregor Monkey Munky Chippy Who are obscenely generous And said an extra 50s worth of Keys Keys
Starting point is 00:18:58 Thank you boys for making us laugh For so many years And counting it for being such stand-up human beings. Thank you. Thank you very much. To the monkey family there. That's it.
Starting point is 00:19:08 But that's not it. We've also got Jeremy Beedlewank challenge. Mike Lighteris. Yeah, that's it. Caroline, where is Shedkey? And a succulent Chinese niche. There we are. Fantastic.
Starting point is 00:19:29 What I want to end on. Thank you so much, everybody. you're amazing and you can support us and join PodSquod by going to streamlabs.com forward slash poddiet's donations and donating three pounds and more
Starting point is 00:19:42 everybody Mikey you are in charge this week I am large and I am indeed in charge but you're not large then why look how much weight you lost Michael John? You're absolutely yeah
Starting point is 00:19:55 yeah very looking trim AF boy thank you can you tell over the podcast just how skinny I am. I can barely hear you. You're so slim. Oh, my God. Thank you. Thank you. But I'm large in spirit forever. If you don't mind, I'm just going to cross the room and put something soft on my guitar.
Starting point is 00:20:17 Because every time I speak, I can just hear it reverberating. He's humble bragging about his guitar and his deep reverberating voice. It's a guitar I don't play. This fucking guy. Guys, don't mind me. I'm just going to, I just need to move my mouth. I just need to... One minute. I'm just going to drag my giant cock
Starting point is 00:20:37 over to the corner of the room. Right. That other sounds like a good name for like a collection of dad power ballads. Put something soft of my guitar. Oh, I thought you were to say my giant cock across the room. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:20:53 It's nearly Father's Day. It's not nearly Father's Day. Like, depending when you're listening to this, it could be Father's Day right now. And if you are listening with your dad, sorted. There you go. You're more comfortable now.
Starting point is 00:21:03 Much more comfortable now. I can speak without going... Mm. ...and the other side of the room. I don't like it. Oh, dear. All right. Would you boys like a question?
Starting point is 00:21:14 Yeah. Yeah. Yes. We start with one from Stuart Christ. Christ. Christ. Christ. At Stucalicious on Twitter.
Starting point is 00:21:24 And they say, it's time for the VCU to present themselves in their own version of a cultural staple, the soap opera. We will need a show title, at least two lead families, a regular location, a bar, pub, office, or something of the sort, a town bad guy or gal
Starting point is 00:21:45 and a cliffhanger to end the first episode. Let's just do, I'll put this in so we've got the reference, but if we had to make a soap opera from the VCU boys, what the hell would that be like? Oh God, I don't know I'm going to try and think up a show title Yeah
Starting point is 00:22:05 I'm trying to think of like What scenario I'm almost leaning towards I mean there's not a lot of them in the VCU But D list British celebrities Trying to get work again Being like the central premise of it Okay
Starting point is 00:22:20 Yeah Maybe they're all like situated out of a warehouse Where they live together And Maybe the two lead families Are there's like a CBBC household and then a CITV household. You know, you've got Neil and
Starting point is 00:22:35 whoever the fuck helps from CITV, we reference, which is, I don't know, jungle run. Keith Chewitkegwin, he counts. Naked, naked Keith Chegwin, living with Neil Buchanan in a house. And then in the other house, it's DBP, it's Dick and Dom, it's, who else is there?
Starting point is 00:22:57 Who else is there? I feel there are more children's TV characters that we reference on there than just... You did Neil? You did Neil? He did Neil. He's CITV. Maybe the Chuckel Brothers. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:23:09 Go in there for sure, yeah. Why not? Yeah. Yeah. I like the premise, though. Yeah. Yeah, that works for me. God, it's coming on with a pun name is harder.
Starting point is 00:23:21 I can't think of any that would fit in. Emmerdale, Coronation Street, EastEnders. Hmm Holly Oaks Yeah that's what I was trying to think of one for Billy Oaks That wasn't really worried Billy
Starting point is 00:23:33 Is it? Billy Oaks Billy Oaks If it was a triple Jump one It could just be called Emma Dale Yeah I was thinking that as well
Starting point is 00:23:44 It's such a specific reference Yeah To that fucking bear Oh man Maybe it's It doesn't need a vidiates Pun title It just needs
Starting point is 00:23:56 Something that tells you The scenario know, the washed-up, you know, kids' TV show people. Yeah. Oh, God, I'm trying my best for this. This is tough. I thought this would flow out, but it's actually a surprisingly difficult world to build. Who would have thought writing a TV show from scratch would be tricky?
Starting point is 00:24:18 What about Devastation Street? Devastation Street. Yeah, big fan of that. they're not all devastated but some more than others but they'd be written to be devastated yeah yeah I think
Starting point is 00:24:35 yeah Neil Becannon's always pissing everyone off because he's always practising with his band and yeah there's nothing left in the kitchen has all been used in big art attacks his mum saying Neil please you need to make money for your family
Starting point is 00:24:49 go back to art attack and he's like no I'm going to be a musician pass me the salt mum that's my calling Dave's selling the toilet seats on eBay again So you've got nothing to sit on Steady income from Dave Yeah Dave's like a wheeler dealer on eBay
Starting point is 00:25:06 Neil is a rock star Yeah, starving artist I think, yeah Dick and Dom are doing DJ sets with Paul Chukle Oh, that'd be late, yeah Yeah, they've got a steady flow of income They're student season as well So they're breaking it in
Starting point is 00:25:22 And Keith Chegwin is just dead He's naked naked and dead at all times. He's just laid out on the living room sofa. Maybe he's presented all nice as if he's at a funeral, but it's, you know, he's in his box. He's in a suit, maybe, or maybe not. You know, maybe he is naked.
Starting point is 00:25:41 But it's a funeral that never comes. And all of them just acknowledge like, sad day, isn't it? Yeah. But that's every day. Every day is a sad day. And he's a bit like, oh my God, they killed Kenny. But it's not a joke.
Starting point is 00:25:55 It's not funny. it's just Keith is always dead I'm not green lighting this season I don't think the show's got legs the more we get into it we've kind of sorted most of that regular location would just be the street they live on the Manchester Media City
Starting point is 00:26:18 perhaps yeah yeah they just live in the abandoned BBC old BBC television studio Yeah, who's the town bad guy? The town bad guy? Yeah. For those, probably the commissioner of the BBC, yeah, almost certainly.
Starting point is 00:26:35 Rents to, boys. Whoever the director general of the BBC was in 2004. Yeah. That's the bad guy. Well, I mean, they probably were a bad guy. Well, 2004, maybe not, but certainly, you know, 1980s, 1970s, a real villain. Director General. Let's have a look.
Starting point is 00:26:53 Who was it? It was Mark John Thompson served from 2004 to 2012 So he's the new guy in town in 2004 And I'm like, please We're clinging to relevancy And he says no We're going in a new direction
Starting point is 00:27:07 Here's Bamzuki Oh no Oh yeah Things changed Look at you Mark He ruined everything He made 450 grand a year apparently What?
Starting point is 00:27:19 Oh really? I thought you meant Bamzuki did for a minute He absolutely fucking not so is that the cliffhanger then at the first episode they you know the first half hour is them hearing the new you know news on the block uh there's a there's a new guy that's the first bit of news second news is keith checkwin died yesterday um oh shit and then towards the end they managed to get a meeting with him and they say hey can we do you want to give us a show maybe and he says no i've got something much more exciting the door
Starting point is 00:27:53 explodes open in sort of bad CGI effects and Jake Humphrey walks in with some sort of 16-legged centipede made out of not many polygons Formula 1's Jake Humphrey
Starting point is 00:28:09 Yeah Former Bamzuki presenter Jake Humphrey That's what he's known for The guy who is openly spoken about his disdain for video games and how childish and pathetic people who play video games are
Starting point is 00:28:21 despite the fact that he presented fucking Bamzuki where you couldn't even see the creatures and everyone had to pretend because they were there. Everyone scream at this white table for 10 minutes. Go play with your cars. Oh, dear.
Starting point is 00:28:35 Wow, that really does. It does change every photo of Bamzuki when you realize they're just screaming at nothing. Oh, wow. Can we get one of those photos out where there is just nothing on the table? There's only Bamzuki behind the scenes out. Sorry, I'm going totally on tangent now, but like Bamzuki's probably going to awaken a lot of, lot of memories for a lot of people.
Starting point is 00:29:00 Yeah, for the benefit of those who have no idea. I mean, it wouldn't surprise me, actually, if that format was sold worldwide and they had some kind of Bamzuki in the States or Australia or whatever. But for those who don't know, Bamzuki in the mid to late noughties, oh, well, Ben is handily copy pasted. It was a computer-generated game show for children, presented by Jones. Comfrey, competitors from across the nation pitch their Zooks against... I forgot they were called Zooks. Sounds like a slur, isn't it?
Starting point is 00:29:31 Yeah. They pit their Zooks against each other in fierce competition and classic battles. Oh, classic. In other words, it was actually live action for the most part in that there were people in a room looking at a table, you know, in a studio, but everything that was happening on the table
Starting point is 00:29:48 was added sort of in post in a kind of augmented reality. way so that you as a viewer could see that there were these really bad low-poly bugs crawling around playing football and tug-of-war and stuff. It laid the grand work for the Mandalorian, I think. Yeah, exactly. It looked so shit. It was one of those shows like 50-50 where I was always just so disappointed when it
Starting point is 00:30:14 was what was on. Yeah. And the Zooks didn't like move properly and stuff. You could make your own Zooks. using their software but most of them didn't walk properly and they had no personality about them but yeah they would
Starting point is 00:30:33 compete in these CGI games on the table and everyone in the studio had to stare at what was definitely just a white table and go come on come on banger get him do it go banger oh look out for Zooktron he's coming
Starting point is 00:30:50 and do a lot of cheer and stuff. And it was, like, there was a narrator, like a commentator as well, I think, wasn't there? Yeah, man. Yeah, they should bring that back. Well, actually, let's not bring it back. It was awful. Let's leave it in the past.
Starting point is 00:31:06 There was a 2009 revival of the series. It originally added in 2004, which appropriately lines up with my offhand comment earlier, but I did not intend it to. The show itself, this is the description on Wikipedia from the 2009 version. The show itself has now been considered, and then it says in brackets, fictionally, by the government as if it were in a legal combat sport and have been trying to shut down the underground organization led by new presenters Barney and Gemma ever since.
Starting point is 00:31:37 There are now four teams in each episode with one Zook each. They take part in a street race at the beginning of each show and the winning team gets to pick an opponent in the next game. The two losing Zooks take part in another challenge called a pressure pusher with the Zook that loses it being destroyed. Each time a Zook is destroyed, edited stock footage is used to show the considerably comical demise of each Zoot. This sounds amazing.
Starting point is 00:32:04 Oh my God, they turned it into an underground illegal street battle. Edgy. I'm watching a clip of it on YouTube now. They're literally just running across rooftops in the UK just these wobbly devoid animals on a badly Cigi-eyed roof. That's incredible. that sounds so much better than what we got I love how they
Starting point is 00:32:26 13 episodes in 2009 and then it never came back I love how they got rid of Barney they got rid of Jake Humphrey because they were like no it needs to be edgy and gritty now and so they got they brought in Barney Harwood did better make an appearance that's what I think yeah Nev oh he started doing
Starting point is 00:32:44 Jake Humphrey started doing real quote unquote real presenting in 2005 so there's a good chance that he was busy back for that. In 2009, he became the anchor for the BBC's Grand Prix for coverage. And then presumably he tuned into CBBC to see Bamzuki's having street races. Oh, I remember Gemma as well.
Starting point is 00:33:05 She did, like, loads of other shows and things. She was my CBBC presenter crush when I was growing up. Gemma? Yeah. Oh. Yeah, I had a real crush on Gemma. I don't think I ever fancied any of the presenters. Damn, I missed out on some formative experiences there.
Starting point is 00:33:21 I'm just I can't stop watching this now but I'm just Have you sent a link? Can I please see it? Yeah I sort of want to see these Zooks on rooftops I'm just looking at the names
Starting point is 00:33:34 of the Zooks now one's called armed response Armed response The continuity at the start before the show begins is that that dog puppet that we never got after our time
Starting point is 00:33:48 And the guy with his Justin Bieber hair Yeah my favorite when does it start oh wow there's sort of a filter on the screen as well just to make it look a bit more
Starting point is 00:33:58 hold on yeah let me see back this it just looks so bad oh my god if you're not if you're not there already go to about
Starting point is 00:34:07 one minute 40 because that is incredible okay hang on what is what is going on why is there a man on a skateboard in a suit there's an old man on a skateboard
Starting point is 00:34:20 and then Oh, it's Barney. It's Barney in a mask. That is absolutely horrible. Man, top quality TV. If you want to see some rooftop action 2430 is when... 2430. Okay, if you search Bamzuki Street Rules Episode 10 on YouTube, you should find it.
Starting point is 00:34:38 What was it, 2430? Yeah. Actually, you go to 2530 a little bit after that. Wow, sorry for everyone at home, but you are... This is peak British culture. Well, worth checking out. witnessing and fold it's uh okay if you haven't ever seen it watch some of the originals as it is just like there's more that is oh there they go over the rooftops wow
Starting point is 00:35:01 and they're still rubbish they are just they've got no traction these zooks they can't move anywhere oh it's just so rubbish imagine like the creature maker in spore yeah it is just like that except that it doesn't make them able to walk properly And it qualifies his national prime time television. That's fantastic. Well, I could watch that for hours, but I feel like for the benefit of our... We've got to move on. We've got to move on.
Starting point is 00:35:29 We just went down such a rabbit hole there. Thank you. Thank you. Who is our question from? Stuart Christ. Cheers, Stu. Christ. When any of you boys like to do a thing?
Starting point is 00:35:42 I've got a little Wikipedia here. Oh, just a little Wikipedia. So I've got... There's a very, very short article that I've been wanting to bring along. long, er long for a long time, for a long time. But it's just too short to be a thing. But I found a separate write-up that goes into much more detail. But I will read the actual Wikipedia article first,
Starting point is 00:36:04 which will take me all of five seconds, and then I'll give you a bit more detail. But this is The Great Sheep Panic. Okay. Okay. The Great Sheep Panic, also known as the Great Sheep Panic of 1888, or the mysterious Oxfordshire Sheep Panic. of 1888 was an event that occurred on the 3rd of November 1888 across southern England.
Starting point is 00:36:28 There are then six citations for that, just to prove that it definitely did happen. Next section on the article is just called event, and here it is. On the evening of the 3rd of November 1888, at about 8 o'clock, thousands of sheep had, by a simultaneous impulse, burst from their bonds, fields, and dwelling. and had been found the next morning, widely scattered, some of them still panting with terror under hedges, and many crowded into corners of fields, some miles from the fields they'd been left in the previous evening.
Starting point is 00:37:03 In the end, it had spread over 200 square miles, that's 520 square kilometres. The Times reported on the 20th of November 1888 that, quote, malicious mischief was out of the question because a thousand men could not have frightened and could not have frightened and released all these sheep. Interestingly, another panic occurred in 1889 in Berkshire, southern England, not far from Reading.
Starting point is 00:37:29 Next section. Possible Explanation In 1921, the scientific journal Nature noted that the 3rd of November 1888 had been, quote, an intensely dark night with occasional flashes of lightning and explained that, quote, panics have often occurred for sheep are notoriously timid and nervous animal. Hmm. Okay. That's the end of the Wikipedia article. It tells you very little. It feels like there's more. There's more afoot here, Peter. I've so many questions, Peter.
Starting point is 00:37:59 Well, I've got a much bigger write up here from people who were there at the time. It also comes with this fantastic image, which is not at all relevant, but I think they just needed something for their article. So they used creepy underscore sheep.p. p.m.g. Oh, sweet Jesus. It's horrid, isn't it? It's nightmare-inducing. Oh, it's a real sheep. God. Yeah, that is a real sheep at someone's table. I thought it was a man in a mask, but no, God.
Starting point is 00:38:28 No, that's a sheep. They're timid preachers, Michael. Not a notoriously timid. A thousand men could have invited that sheep for tea. This article, according to Esot Turks, that's E-S-O-T-E-R-X.com, begins with the sentence sheep aren't stupid They're almost as smart as pigs And about the same level as cattle
Starting point is 00:38:55 Sure They won't be writing any heartbreaking novels Of staggering genius Or winning on Jeopardy anytime soon And they've been domesticated by humans For at least 12,000 years As a consequence One might imagine
Starting point is 00:39:08 They have a pretty good idea Of what they need to be afraid of It continues like that It kind of bollocks for a little bit But I'm going to skip ahead slightly So, curiously, on the fateful evening of November 3rd, 1888, something collectively scared the bejesus out of tens of thousands of sheep in Oxfordshire, England, a bizarre event that has not been adequately understood to this day.
Starting point is 00:39:33 Two local seed import-export men named Oakshot and Millard in Reading, which seemed to be the epicentre of the event, Millard, which seemed to be the epicentre of the event, sent a letter to the editor of the popular Hardwick Science Gossip magazine detailing the event and wondering if anyone could offer a plausible explanation. Sheep panic near Reading.
Starting point is 00:39:58 I beg to call attention to a remarkable circumstance which occurred in this immediate locality on the night of Saturday, November 3rd at a time as near 8 o'clock as possible. What? At a time as near 8 o'clock as possible. 7.59, I guess.
Starting point is 00:40:18 Tens of thousands of sheep folded in the large sheep-breeding districts, north, east, and west of Reading, were taken with a sudden fright, jumping their hurdles and escaping from the fields, and running hither and thither. In fact, there must for some time have been a perfect stampede. Early on Sunday morning, the shepherds found the animals under hedges and in the roads, panting as if they had been terror-stricken. The extent of the occurrence may be judged when we mention that every large farmer
Starting point is 00:40:47 from Wallingford on the one hand to Twifford on the other has reported that his sheep were similarly frightened. It's also noteworthy that with two or three exceptions the hill country north of the Thames seem to be principally affected. We've not heard, nor can any of the farmers
Starting point is 00:41:05 give any reasonable explanation of the facts as we have described. The night was intensely dark with occasional flashes of lightning, but we scarcely think the latter circumstance would account for such a wide spread effect. We would suggest the probability
Starting point is 00:41:17 of a slight earthquake being the cause, but perhaps you or some of the readers of science gossip may be able to offer a more
Starting point is 00:41:24 satisfactory explanation. Signed, Oak Shot and Millard. But really, this article continues and basically says that people really didn't
Starting point is 00:41:37 know what was going on. So it kind of talks for a bit about the discussions, the theories that were put forward. The weather wasn't especially
Starting point is 00:41:45 bad that night, but meteorological, seismological, and even astronomical causes were immediately discussed as the source of the night of horrified sheep. None of these natural explanations were deemed convincing, although a number of contemporary natural scientists were quick to point out that historically, a lot of weird stuff seemed to drop from the sky onto Oxfordshire, particularly in November. What? This just, it gets wier rather than more coherent, I'm afraid.
Starting point is 00:42:20 So it was a, this was a tough nut to crack for the skeptics since it's hard to miss all the sheep in Oxfordshire stampeding for no discernible reason. That being that some people were saying it never happened in the first place. You know, we don't think that, we think it's made up that the sheep panicked. But it absolutely did happen.
Starting point is 00:42:42 and it continues for a while with no real explanation. It talks about the shepherds of Oxfordshire were equally puzzled when the sheep went nuts again in 1893 and suffered through the same unsatisfying suggestions that seismological or meteorological events startled their poor animals, tens of thousands of them, across a few hundred square miles. Various causes for these panics have been suggested, but hitherto no reasonable one has been satisfactorily adduced. On the night of December 4th, 1893, another very remarkable panic among sheep occurred
Starting point is 00:43:22 in the northern and middle parts of Oxfordshire. This is according to a writer called Alpin in 1984. Some naturally concluded they'd been worried by a dog. Some, finding the sheep, exhibited no marks of being worried, concluded they'd only been frightened, perhaps only been frightened, perhaps by a dog or a fox. Others applied to the police. The result of any inquiries made by the police or privately
Starting point is 00:43:47 or by mentioning the fact among neighbours, however, was to elicit the fact that the panic had been extended over a very large tract of the country and that unless it was allowed that all the dogs and foxes in the district had with concerted action simultaneously arisen and attacked hundreds of flocks on the same night. this attempt to account for the panic would have to be abandoned. As the Wikipedia article concluded, the closest that there is to a consensus is that it was a very dark night and the sheep got scared.
Starting point is 00:44:25 But I don't believe that. A lot of people say, well, what about the other dark nights? You know, why doesn't it happen a lot? Unless this was like the first dark night with lightning And I don't believe it Yeah, it's very strange So you can read more about that That article is much longer
Starting point is 00:44:48 But I didn't want to just kind of read the whole thing Because there's an awful lot to it But not with any particular extra detail It mostly just recounts It says like what happened on the night of whatever And then it just gives the full text of the source and just repeats a lot of the information that it's just written in their own words.
Starting point is 00:45:08 But there you go. The Great Sheep Panic of 1888. No one really knows why they all did it. What a mystery. I think it was Allens. Yeah, I think it was Allens as well. Yeah. It's been a very shepherd-heavy few episodes, hasn't it?
Starting point is 00:45:24 I've never heard the word said so much. Yeah. This is the shepherd's pie. First pie and now shepherds. Oh, no. That ridiculous. But that's my thing. A bit weird.
Starting point is 00:45:36 Weird. Weird. Thank you, Peter. Thank you. I'm curious about the other things that fell from the sky during that time. I know. I just glossed over that, really.
Starting point is 00:45:46 That seems like the biggest mystery here, not the sheep running away. That things fell from the sky in Oxfordshire in November, apparently, specifically. Yeah. Thank you very much, Peter. You're welcome. Would you all like another question?
Starting point is 00:46:01 Sure. This one comes from Jack Without the Sea at Jack Without the Sea on Twitter he wants to know what's the one thing you just don't ever want to do is there something that's just
Starting point is 00:46:16 of no interest no one could ever persuade you into doing it no matter what and you're just like nah had enough of that my knee jerk reaction was exercise but I do do it
Starting point is 00:46:28 I just don't want to do it ever I feel like for me it's it's using Facebook the way it was intended I don't think anyone could ever force me to give life updates on it even even I just it's nice for all people
Starting point is 00:46:47 it's a nice way to keep up with whatever your weird family are doing it's nice to see them going out for meals but I just couldn't imagine me using it in a serious manner of like I had a lovely knot out with I've seen you all I mean now I'm now I'm talking it makes you sound awful.
Starting point is 00:47:03 I'm not appreciative. It just still like the idea of using Facebook. You know, there are ways you can just stay in touch with your own family via like WhatsApp or whatever or on the phone. You don't have to. If you feel you don't want to use Facebook, that's entirely your lookout, Mikey.
Starting point is 00:47:20 Yeah, I just, I'd rather keep my online presence to crap posting on shitter. I mean, posting on Twitter, God. And that's about it. That's as far as I go. yeah fair enough i know what yours would be based on that then it would be ticot right oh you know what that's a very good point there were very few people telling me to do yeah there are very few people telling me
Starting point is 00:47:44 i must be on ticot but i do quite frequently because of our most recent uh higher ashton who is a youth and down with the the children and she likes the tic tic tics today it i do have an ample opportunity at work to sort of sigh and roll my eyes quite a lot, which I would never pass up on for sure. When you next, do your next round of predictions, can one of, like, the next person that comes in to replace whoever loses be a TikTok influencer, and every week they have to make a TikTok and hope you, Ben. Oh, God, I mean, that's a good, bad suggestion, yeah. And it's what, oh, just imagine dancing around in front of your phone, Ben, doesn't that sound appealing?
Starting point is 00:48:28 doing trends no it doesn't it actually doesn't sound appealing at all problem is Ashton wouldn't mind if we did that if she lost
Starting point is 00:48:36 she'd be like fine just carrying and doing what I normally do no I don't think she posts that much but yeah
Starting point is 00:48:42 I don't understand TikTok either and it makes me angry I think I'm just an old man I don't understand this is how the internet used to be
Starting point is 00:48:50 it makes me cross can you imagine how powerful you would be if you grew up with TikTok Mikey oh god
Starting point is 00:48:55 the videos you used to make would certainly have gone viral if they were able to take advantage of today's platforms my prime was lost on an unloving youtube audience i know it's bullshit it's gone it's gone but we get to enjoy it post mary poppins on tic talk yeah maybe i'll just go through and find snippets from my old videos and i'll take it off and convince the world i'm still a young child magnificent yeah well i've had all this time with you two giving your answers to try and think of something interesting but i'm really just stuck
Starting point is 00:49:28 I mean, I never iron anything. If I lived alone, I would occasionally iron things when I had to, you know, I'd iron shirts if I was going to something nice and trousers and stuff and iron my chinos, because they do, you can't not iron those. But I'm fortunate in that Amy doesn't really mind ironing. She says, oh, I'm fine, just like I'll stick a podcast on. like get my laptop out and put that on the bed and just watch true crime documentaries and she'll just happily iron. I'm fully on the same page as you. I don't like doing it.
Starting point is 00:50:08 And I couldn't imagine doing it with something in the background. With me, ironing is like it's a fully, like you have to really concentrate and be angry and present in the moment to make it good. That's why I hate it so much. I'm so bad at it. And even if I try, I just can't seem to get good at it. And I just don't understand how you're supposed to iron a shirt. I don't understand how do you do it.
Starting point is 00:50:29 It doesn't make sense. I don't understand how you do one side and then how you do the other side without fucking up the first side again. You know, that's what I struggle with. Christ, boys. Have you never worked in an office before where you needed to wear a shirt and tie?
Starting point is 00:50:42 Yeah. What the fun did you do? What did you do? Well, back then I was still living at home. I think. I mean, yeah, I've definitely, yeah, all my shirts. Well, I guess also there was a time
Starting point is 00:50:56 where I lived with Amy, where she would do a lot of the ironing, and then there was a time where I didn't, and I had to start doing occasional bits of ironing again, and that's when I really started to hate it. Did you just start out of the fronts, and then wear a hoodie, so it could be all crumpled at the back? That's like peak angry Sunday evening activity. Like, oh, shit, I've got ironed my shirts, God. I hated that, making your lunch for the next day and also have to iron your shirt and clean your
Starting point is 00:51:21 shoes as well. I used to get that Sunday feeling with. Like, there would be some half-decent TV shows on a Sunday night that, like, you know, I didn't mind watching. But they would be tinged with the, oh, it's the Sunday night show, you know? Like, even just watching this means that it's Monday tomorrow. Yeah, it's just like, yeah, you're watching this. It's like, oh, this feeling is overcoming me again. God, Megan, stop.
Starting point is 00:51:51 I even used to feel that about having a roast dinner, because we would have ours in the evening rather than at London. lunchtime. And I think any time after about 1pm on a Sunday, you start to feel the approach of Monday. And so we would be like sitting down to eat at like 6pm or whatever. And it's like a delicious roast dinner, but fuck, it's Monday in the morning. This is your last bit of joy for quite a while until the weekend comes back. Oh dear. Yeah. But yeah, ironing. I absolutely hate it. I can't do it. And I'm very fortunate in that, you know, there are chores. I like to do or don't mind doing and there are chores that Amy doesn't mind doing and we align pretty well you know
Starting point is 00:52:33 you should marry you know cover things for each other yeah yeah it sounds like a keeper mm-hmm I should do um Ben would you like to do your thing or I can take the reins if you want thank you for the question
Starting point is 00:52:46 Jack without the sea I could hop in here and do my thang yeah go on present your time your thing thing thing here it comes it's from the UIjunky.com and I'm going to tell you a little bit about the extremely insane
Starting point is 00:53:02 Russian game show that involved live police chase. Oh God. This was sold to me as GTA the television show which it technically kind of is so I'm going to tell you a little bit about it and here we go. Okay.
Starting point is 00:53:16 There are many bizarre game shows out there but I think the Russian The Intercept, which is the name of the show, The Intercept, wins the title of the most weird one. You see, In this game, the contestants of the show are given a chance to steal a car.
Starting point is 00:53:30 If the thief can stay away from the cops for 35 minutes, he or she wins a new car, the car that they've stolen, basically. What? The Interceptor was a Russian extreme game show popular in 1997 to 1998. I think this has been translated this article. It involves two players, the so-called hijackers, accompanied by their assistants, the navigators. Each car is equipped with a low-jack vehicle tracking system that allows other vehicles to be tracked by police. The goal of the hijackers is to avoid getting arrested for as long as possible.
Starting point is 00:54:01 The adversaries are The Hunters, driving six Ford-Crowned Victoria Police interceptors of the Patrol Service Special Battalion, and they are leaded, it says, by a commanding officer. The pursuit took place in the streets of Moscow. The hijackers could use any means in order to hide from the hunters. The only forbidden thing was the violation of traffic rules. If a contestant did violate the traffic rules, he or she was obliged to stop for 60 seconds, which you would have thought would allow the police to catch them, but there we are. Right. The hijackers started running from places that are known in advance, and the hunters may start pursuing them immediately. If the hijacker is not detained in 30 minutes, he can stop
Starting point is 00:54:40 the game and pass to the next stage. If he keeps on without getting arrested for five more minutes, he gets the car. During the second seasons, uh, the hijackers started running with their fuel tanks practically empty. The participants had the opportunity to pick up the fuel can, prepared specially for them at the agreed place or to get the fuel in any other way it says also the hijackers were allowed to take a portable radio transmitter to eavesdrop the communications between the hunters the show presenter comments on everything that is happening
Starting point is 00:55:12 from a studio full of supporters and he also speaks by turn with the hijackers and the hunters commanding officers so this show sounds fucking mad and sounds like hunted but specifically in cars channel 4 show hunted
Starting point is 00:55:32 where it's like you're a fugitive which is apparently massively staged and like they like force stuff make them move on when they they've actually found a really good place to just hunker down and yeah well it turns out that this may have been a bit staged as well
Starting point is 00:55:50 based on another article that I read while researching this turns out that the public perception in Russia of these of sort of the police is not good and so this show was meant to make them look amazing essentially oh so while it was you know they were stealing a car and they had to evade the police they practically every time they got caught right and and significant portions of roads were like shut down and stuff like that. So I've got some interesting facts here. The shooting of The Intercept was always scheduled for days when the Russian road traffic
Starting point is 00:56:32 safety had their routine trainings. In one of the editions of the show, Moscow Ring Road was blocked in order to catch the hijackers. The hunters once had to ask the river police for help. I don't know what the escapees were doing, but there we are. The participants often had to try escaping in unusual ways. They painted their cars, used railway transport, and tried to hide the car to avoid bearing. I don't know, it says. A very dangerous trick was shown once.
Starting point is 00:57:02 The car passed from one train to another while on the run. At times, the presenter himself didn't know what to expect from the hijackers. The Intercept is the first Russian show sold abroad on license. And I would love to see it, like another, like an adaptation, because there's almost no clips that I could find online for this. Which is weird because you would have thought Sounds amazing I'd like to see the show
Starting point is 00:57:26 Making me sick I'm dying. Oh God, it's all too much The excitement Yeah, you'd think it would do well online just on YouTube and stuff Yeah, that's bits With an overbearing American narrator
Starting point is 00:57:41 But he's about to make a wrong turn He gets driven off the road Looks like this man's run out of road Exactly Exactly Let's see In the 13th episode of The Intercept An ordinary patrol car
Starting point is 00:57:59 That wasn't hired for the show Started pursuing the hijacker Oh no What a fact And once a real hijacker Apparently did participate in the show I don't know if they were successful But there we are
Starting point is 00:58:13 A little bit of A little sneaky look at some Russian game shows for you They're just over there doing GTA Why not? Why not? I tell you what, that was on Sunday. I wouldn't be sad. It was Sunday.
Starting point is 00:58:27 Oh, I still would. I'd be like, yay! It's the hijacking game. It's time to watch crime. I've got to do ironing. Oh, no. Amy's got to do some ironing. There's a new show coming on,
Starting point is 00:58:41 this is not a plug or an ad, but I'm genuinely interested. Mikey, I don't know if you've seen this. There's a new show coming on Channel 4. I don't think they've done a release date yet, called uh is it called the island or or i can't remember but it's set it's a reality tv show and they've got like a hebridean island like a small island with a village on it and they're doing like a island wide murder mystery where people go on in teams and i think they're work
Starting point is 00:59:09 it might be like one person and one like ex-detective or something and there's like a body and they have to go around and, like, just speak to people on the island and work out what's happened. It's all this big, like, staged murder that they have to solve, which sounds pretty cool. But knowing Channel 4, who show Hunted, which is, as I say, disappointing based on the fact that it's an interesting idea, but it's massively staged, it might turn out to be rubbish, but it's an interesting idea. Yeah, it sounds, I mean, hopefully with it being on an island, that makes it. easy it to make because we at work we were nearly brought on to do a hundred kind of thing but to promote a game and we spent weeks researching it and yeah the whole like hundred is so scripted you wouldn't believe just just getting the permission to you know to go anywhere takes weeks
Starting point is 01:00:04 of work you can't just all right the running in this direction call the council call them up now we need a commission for this road yeah but i think if they've got a whole island that's got the potential it be magical but i my favorite thing about the the the road Russian one was that steel a car get away while obeying road. I know, what is that? Very gentle little chase. There's all sorts of like information flying around that I'm not sure what is true and what isn't. Some articles I found mentioned that they could go and get their car like sprayed and like change how it looks or alter it how it looks.
Starting point is 01:00:42 But then it says in that article that they've got trackers in that the police can just follow anyway. there's almost no chance you can win I think only two people have won and then there's a nine gag post here which you know is always trustworthy that says The Intercept, a Russian game show where you have to steal a new car evade real police for 35 minutes to get it
Starting point is 01:01:02 get caught, you go to jail I don't think he goes to jail I don't know it doesn't seem right but certainly it's inspired a lot of a lot of sort of mystery and intrigue and you can't really find it on the internet to watch it but it appears in lots and lots of listicles of like the most insane game shows from
Starting point is 01:01:21 around the world but there you are the intercept which is surprisingly hard to find information about because lots of um lots of films and other tv shows have that name so of course good luck police interceptors love that show if we happen to have any russian listeners go to nana's house and look through a collection of eHS tapes maybe she's got a taped episode episode of it there amongst me. Nana loves the intercept. She's always watching it. Biggest fan. Oh, thank you very much, Ben.
Starting point is 01:01:55 Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. That was great. Welcome. Would you like a question? Yes, please. This one's coming out here, hot and fresh from Darius Owing Canning at Darius Canning on Twitter. You get the ability to reach into the TV and pull out a one object displayed on screen.
Starting point is 01:02:17 What do you choose to nab? The lamp from Aladdin, Luke's Lightsaber, Adam Sandler's click remote, Mjolnia, Kratos, Azax, the Holy Grail, Woody slash Buzz from Toy Story, anything you can grab. What one thing? What would you stick on the TV and grab? Gemma Hunt from CBBC. Oh, God, no. Peter.
Starting point is 01:02:38 No, that's weird. Obviously. Obviously, be facetious. I mean, that's literally, you use the word object in the question. That is the epitome of object. but that was the quote-unquote joke and also we all know peter that human beings can't pass through the television void because they just turn to dust in your hands it has to be no that's true yes and they can also see you they can see you in your living room when you like wait at the
Starting point is 01:03:05 tv are aware of your presence i definitely thought that when i was about five or six i thought they probably I thought that they when they looked at the camera that behind the camera there was this wall of monitors just showing all the kids on their chairs looking back at them
Starting point is 01:03:25 I eventually grew out of the idea at maybe age seven a considerable amount of time I thought everything on TV was live even the adverts they'd be standing in the studio I hope this goes well. Oh, dear.
Starting point is 01:03:45 What object would I pull out of the TV? I think it'd be food for me. Yeah, I don't want an omnipotence from some lamp or Adam Sandler's click remote because if I remember that movie, it made him very unhappy. It made me a lot of the movie, so I don't want that. I don't want any, you know, spooky shit that's going to fuck with my life. I just want to... Immediately before you started reading out those thoughts
Starting point is 01:04:14 or those suggestions in the question, I was just going to say, the first burger that pops up in an advert. Because it's always nicer on TV than it is in real life. Even if it's got fucking PVA glue in it or whatever they use to make it look really cheesy. I'll have it. I'll have that, thanks.
Starting point is 01:04:32 They put glue on like wheatobics and stuff to make the creamy. Yeah, would you get it as it's made? What is that? What is that? Keep me a glue. What gives us it, it's spring. It's bounce.
Starting point is 01:04:47 My mind went straight to steamed hams from the Simpsons, but I remember that. They're not actually steamed hams. They're just fucking burgers. They're just fucking burgers. They do look good, though. I like how he lays it all out on a tray with the chips sort of surrounding it. Oh, yeah. Very fancy.
Starting point is 01:05:02 Sorry, the fries. Man, I don't know. My gut would be, and it's kind of a. not a low-hanging fruit answer but maybe an obvious answer um bernard's watch was that even one of the examples i don't know i think we've talked about like taking bernard's watch before as well haven't we yeah but if we've talked about it but yeah no you're right it's it's a dangerous one but thinking about it you know Bernard's watch wasn't that great like it'll be handy for literally all it was made for in the show which is that bernard was always running late
Starting point is 01:05:36 so he would just like click the watch so he could catch the bus and stuff but if you try to use it for like anything more sinister I think number one that's sinister you know if you like burgling shops and stuff I kind of feel like it would it would kind of ruin your life in a way because it would just change the way the world worked for you
Starting point is 01:05:58 so that you wouldn't appreciate anything anymore you would just be able to go and it's like money can buy you happiness and neither can Bernard's watch I think yeah so yeah I also wouldn't want some sort of omnipotent relic but I don't know what I would want I think I know
Starting point is 01:06:16 what I want now actually I'd stick on a grand day out Wallace and Gromit oh yeah I think I'd just take the entire
Starting point is 01:06:23 set if possible I'd settle for just Wallace but I'd love to just take the entire set and have that I would oh that would make me
Starting point is 01:06:30 so happy just put that in a corner in like a glass display case and that would be me set for life I don't need
Starting point is 01:06:35 anything else I've got my little Yorkshire and it's a Yorkshire of Manchester what is he? Lancashire. Lankishire, sorry. Lankishamans living room.
Starting point is 01:06:44 That would bring me endless joy. That's a great shout. I'm actually watching at the moment the Cosgrove Hall stop motion animation of the wind in the willows. Purely from a, I just, it's so aesthetically pleasing as a stop motion series in the same way that Wallace and Gromit is. You know, like the cheese looks great in Wallace and Wallace and. grommet and just the way everyone moves and stuff it's exactly the same you would probably recognize it um cosgrove hall did loads and loads of um stop motion and then later on actual cg animation stuff but um they they quite famously did a like a five series and two
Starting point is 01:07:29 feature film uh series of um winning the willows adaptations and yeah i'm i'm with you actually to have a set from a very pretty aesthetically pleasing stop motion thing would be a great shout so if you'll let me copy off your homework but change it a bit so it's not obvious then that's what I would have I'll allow you you've made a good choice thing because it's all old Quinn British things as well isn't it
Starting point is 01:07:56 burger burger burger you two would be like the supervillains in a children's movie where suddenly Wallace and Grommett disappears from everyone's VHS copies. Yeah, it's just a desolate moon. It's like, where's he gone?
Starting point is 01:08:12 And there's Michael Johnson cackling as he slowly collects beloved childhood characters and puts them in his museum. He does nothing. He just looks at them. He's depriving us of our joy. Yeah. Wow, I didn't know about Cosgrove Hall.
Starting point is 01:08:28 I'm going to look into that because it looks very, very cute. I think they made things like Postman Pat and stuff like that. or maybe not specifically that, but they've made lots of familiar stop-motion shows from like the late 90s. Feynman Sam?
Starting point is 01:08:42 Possibly. I'll tell you. I'll look it up, but we can move on if you want and I'll update you in a few moments' time. Okay, lovely. Mighty. It's time for my thing.
Starting point is 01:08:52 I'm bringing back a slightly old game that we've played before. Would you all like to have a game of guess the attraction from the one-star trip advisor a review. Oh, yeah, it's a good game. So I've got a selection of crappy reviews from attractions across the globe, and you
Starting point is 01:09:13 boys have got to figure out what the heck they're talking about from these weird, vague and overly complainy statements. Brilliant. I'll just give you this list now. Nody. Oh, yeah. The 90s to early noughties version that we probably familiar with. There was one before that.
Starting point is 01:09:32 They made one in the 70s as well. by them but that's not our one and since then there's been another one that is not our one um okey doke andrews show um brambly hedge which i never watch but i'm aware of um as a
Starting point is 01:09:48 name uh and then bob the builder and the light no way bob the builder um and things like that so they kind of graduated into that kind of slightly more um where everything looked like it was made out of icing
Starting point is 01:10:03 You know, Bob the Builder style. So there are various other shows that, again, we probably wouldn't know, that were made in the Bob the Builder style that, yeah, that they made too. So there you go. And then the studio went out of business because 3D animation.
Starting point is 01:10:18 Woo! Yeah. Right. We're going to start near enough to home here just to get us off on a relatively easy start. Let's start with the capital of the UK, London. I've got a couple of reviews here from the first one The title of this one is
Starting point is 01:10:37 Gone Down Hill Went here on the 23rd of January To check if any birds here Only saw two pigeons and one seagull Flying above the area That one is entirely impossible to guess from I just thought it was funny Which would become funny
Starting point is 01:10:52 But it's just throwing it in there for a bit of spice Where would you be looking for birds in London Hyde Park I thought maybe Trafalgar Square Wow Bingo got in one Why would you want to go find the birds Haven't they
Starting point is 01:11:10 They've got rid of the pigeons Haven't they? They've got rid of the pigeons In Trafalgar Square This was a recurring theme There's a lot of one star of you Citing like where's the pigeons That's fucking weird Who goes looking for pigeons
Starting point is 01:11:20 They're everywhere Genuinely It's like there's people like Like People like conspiracy theorists Almost like saying What would the government Have done something to the pigeons
Starting point is 01:11:29 Which turns out they have I had no idea. I just, you know, I don't think they did anything that wild. They've not installed some sort of, like, pigeon bomb in the square. I think they've just, yeah, I think they've either, I don't know exactly what they've done, but hang on, I'll Google it. Again, you can move on if you want to know. I went to London to go see those fucked up mutant London fucking pigeons and there's none there. It's a suggestion from Google.
Starting point is 01:11:57 Where did the pigeon, the pigeons? Where did the pigeons go from? What did the pigeons go from? London's pigeon problem has a simple solution, colon, a hawk. Oh, wow. So now I'm going to see the really fat hawks. Yeah. But we know how the...
Starting point is 01:12:20 Sorry, carry on. They stop people from feeding the pigeons. I think they really enforce the signs everywhere saying don't feed them. And, yeah, I think that's it, actually. They just, oh, and they put loads of anti-roosting spikes as well on all the buildings. So the pigeons just go somewhere else. We know how that stuff works, though, don't we, right? Like, if there's an abundance of hawks, again, I don't know how many hawks they've got in London,
Starting point is 01:12:48 they eat all the pigeons, then there's no pigeons for them to eat, then the number of hawks goes down, the number of pigeons goes out. It's just going to surely fluctuate forever, right? No, but so it says here Yeah, they got rid of the food They saw people feeding the pigeons They got rid of food cellars in the square Oh man
Starting point is 01:13:06 But they also got the food cellars in the square Before that They got them to introduce birth control hormones In the food Which didn't work, it said They're doing pigeon eugenics This is awful! Oh my God They then made it illegal to feed the birds
Starting point is 01:13:23 Inchavagos Square They installed the spikes on surrounding buildings And then they don't release hawks. They get a hawkman, you know, like Tony. Hawkehart. Yeah, I want to get Tony Hawkman. To come with his hawk or her hawk to fly around the square for the day. And that kills pigeons and or scares the pigeons away.
Starting point is 01:13:46 And I don't know if they still bring the hawk in, or if you just do it often enough for a period of time and then the pigeons go. I've got your Trafalgar Square to watch the hawk show at this point. It's pigeon killing day Oh boy Come on Timmy Bring an umbrella It's gonna get wet
Starting point is 01:14:01 Oh god Yeah well well done Ben you got in one I'll read out the remaining two of you I'll have in front of me Traffic choked Congested European Square If you like lots of roaring buses
Starting point is 01:14:13 Spewing diesel exhaust fumes If you like honking horns And dreadful traffic If you like crowds of overweight Camera-torting ice cream sucking tourists This is the place for you But get me out of
Starting point is 01:14:25 Wow. And who are you, buddy? And the last one is, why is this an attraction at all? This is a small patch of land located in a roundabout with a column on it, and tourists standing around looking at each other, the traffic, question marks. Yeah, well done, well done. Wow. All right, we'll move on to another London attraction. We're getting unhinged straight away on this one. absolute dollop reads the title
Starting point is 01:14:55 If pseudoscience, fake evolution and fake dinosaurs is your thing then knock yourself out from monkey man to overgrown lizards this veritable feast of nonsense is sure to wet the appetite of those who prefer to be given their history rather than researching it
Starting point is 01:15:13 the minute I walked through the door I couldn't wait to leave starting with quote unquote human evolution if you believe that used to be a fish or whatever, then turn it to some kind of chimp, then you are right at home in this museum. After a couple of fake dinosaurs, I got so bored,
Starting point is 01:15:30 I'd rather catch COVID. No such luck. I'm surprised he believes in COVID for a start. And also, that's the biggest. What is a real dinosaur to this guy? He's calling them fake dinosaurs. Because they're not alive. Is that the problem?
Starting point is 01:15:45 They're not currently alive, so they're fake. Yeah, definitely. Creationists believe the world is 6,000 years old. and fossils of dinosaurs that are allegedly millions of years old were put there by either fucking China or something, I don't know, like a conspiracy, or they were actually put there by God to test our faith. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:16:09 If you want to believe that, that's fine, but I'm just saying, I don't. I'm going to put my foot down. You're a fucking idiot. Oh, God. This, I usually, like, I mean, there's a few in here, like in this thing, there's a few that are definitely kind of baity and purposefully bad. But this is from someone who's made 3,829 contributions to TripAdvisor. So it has so many.
Starting point is 01:16:31 What is a creationist doing, even attempting to go into what I'm assuming is the Natural History Museum? Boom, bum, bum, bum. What do you expect from that? Everyone knows that you walk through that door. And depending on when this was posted, the original big, like, you know, The big wow factor when you walk through the door was Dippy, the diplodocus. Like it was the whole point of the central room in the Natural History Museum was a giant dinosaur skeleton. It's now a blue whale, but what do you expect?
Starting point is 01:17:10 I don't know. I'm Derek Horse hater, and I've had a terrible time at the Grand National. Rubbish. One star, don't go. well in a similar I think Derek Orsator would like the Grand National because quite frequently You can't wait for the foot of the horse curtain
Starting point is 01:17:28 I'm Derek Orsater Had a great time Brought my own gun Oh dear That's fantastic One star they escorted me out Because I brought my own gun In a similar vein
Starting point is 01:17:40 Then one more of you For the museum is Full of Died Animal Not for vegan You can't enjoy looking at stoofed Died Animals Full of Died Animals Full of Died Animals
Starting point is 01:17:50 I know. Stoved. Stoved. I love that. That's great. Oh, God. Right. I'm sure most of them died of natural court.
Starting point is 01:17:59 Well, I don't know. Some of the older ones probably were definitely shot by, quote, unquote, explorers. Yes, there's some old boys who paid a lot on to go out hunting. Yes. Fantastic. All right, let's get the ferry across the river. The river?
Starting point is 01:18:14 The, what is it? The port? What? The channel. That's it. Jesus. The river. The small sea.
Starting point is 01:18:19 Yeah. The big stream. The Leigh. Oh, that's embarrassing. Sorry. Oh, dear. The France water. Yeah, let's jump over the small pond to France and breathe in some culture.
Starting point is 01:18:34 You start with, this is the title. Triangle Heller-Suss. The Louvre? Lufre. The big glass sus triangle. Immediately, this has got, some of these have got to be joke reviews, right? You can't call the triangle, hellers. us.
Starting point is 01:18:51 This one definitely is, but I liked it too much to not include it. Apparently, this is an art gallery. Don't be fooled. And another one for the Louvre is, is it Louvre or Louvre? Do you send it in French? You want to go with it, really. Bonjour. The Louvre.
Starting point is 01:19:04 The Louvre. The Louvre. Le Louvre. Le Louvre. The other review was, you would have got this straight away. Anyway, just a big glass pyramid. It's just a pyramid with a bunch of paintings. I'm really sorry, but just can't accept that this is worth my time.
Starting point is 01:19:20 I can't accept it. Did they go inside or did they just get there and go, where the fuck's the Mona Lisa? It gives a horrible view of the paintings. Couldn't see it. I don't know what they're expecting from an art gallery, but...
Starting point is 01:19:33 I know. These people, like, they just go to somewhere that has a five-star review, not checking what it is. And when they get there, they're like, oh, it's a fucking train museum. I wanted football.
Starting point is 01:19:46 And you know these people have like flown to this country as well. This is at once, potentially once in a lifetime opportunity to see some stuff they would never normally see. It's like, yeah, shit triangle. Why, I'm struggling to understand why this is worth my time.
Starting point is 01:20:02 It's just some paintings. It's just some fucking paintings. All right, move on to the next attraction in merry old France. It's, well, it's spelled itted big, but it's big, but
Starting point is 01:20:17 me, I mean, except for the My chance of you seeing an accident, the place is packed and uninteresting. That one doesn't reveal too much the chance of seeing an accident. An accident threw me off. I thought it was going to be the Eiffel Tower, but hopefully there aren't many accidents there. No, God, no. Chance of seeing an accident. Oh, could it be some kind of driving place?
Starting point is 01:20:43 Kind of, yeah. Do you want me to read the next one, see if you get any closer? Sure. This one's titled simply bricks Nice bricks Yeah, bingo Because it's on a roundabout I always see because of the roundabout right
Starting point is 01:20:57 Bricks Nice bricks Bricks Nice bricks but nothing really to see A purest might enjoy looking at the cement And perhaps the design But after 20 to 30 seconds You might start counting the number of cars driving by
Starting point is 01:21:12 Or looking at the more interesting pigeons And then the cement get billing Above the design Imagine seeing a monument and going Some nice bricks, that. Just some bricks in it. That's a very aesthetically pleasing assembling of bricks.
Starting point is 01:21:26 A rainbow of bricks. Some nice bricks there. And the last one. The last one is disappointed. You can't argue the history of this place. However, it's just a glorified roundabout surrounded by angry, ignorant French people. Ignorant.
Starting point is 01:21:43 Ignorant. I think by definition, the tourist, complaining that French people are at the Ark of the Triumph is the ignorant one. Sure. Yes, probably. Yeah. All right. We're staying in Italy.
Starting point is 01:21:55 Shit. We're not staying in Italy. We're going to Italy. There we go. We're going on a little sightseeing to. Failed construction. I don't think I need to say anything more than that for Italy, but I'll keep going. Right.
Starting point is 01:22:09 In a few words, by marketing this smartly, people are realizing the money invested on this failed architecture. Agreed. It's an iconic location and kind of a must see but that's all because of the publicity and nothing else.
Starting point is 01:22:23 I've built a garage at the bottom of my garden that's leaning over while people flock into my house. That's basically the attitude there. Yeah. Wow. Well, yeah, you got it.
Starting point is 01:22:33 It is the Leaning Tower of Pisa. But Leaning Tower of Pisa was built to be intentionally leaning. It wasn't an accident, was it? I mean, it's starting to lean more and more every year. They keep... I thought it was an accident. Take preventative measures
Starting point is 01:22:46 to stop it from leaning too far, so I don't know. I thought it was an accident. I thought it started to lean, but I don't know. I've just always assumed that. I'm not sure. For some reason, yeah, I thought maybe, okay, I'll look into that another day.
Starting point is 01:22:59 This isn't the leading to Harry Pizza podcast. That's for my own time from zero stars. I didn't even have any, wasn't even fucking pizza there. Rubbish. Not straight. Oh, God. Can't even boo you like.
Starting point is 01:23:13 It's not leaning that much. I'm standing around with their hands in the air. I find just 10 people and none of them are happy about it I like those photos that people take of the people at the Leaning Tower of Pisa I don't think there's anything original you can take a photo of there now is there
Starting point is 01:23:31 like everything's been done like just even like going back to taking pictures of the people taking pictures I want to see someone go and reinvent the game just do something really outlandish well a lot of people have done the Leaning Tower of Pisa is my dick one oh good yeah I saw one recently where someone had put it in their
Starting point is 01:23:48 yeah that's the one I was about to say yeah the backpack one I want to do it I want to go to these famous landmarks where you do these things but I'm like the photo is purposefully taken where I'm about a foot away from it so it doesn't like it doesn't line up
Starting point is 01:24:03 I did see a photo of someone doing that pose next to the Coliseum in Rome which is great I enjoy that a couple more reviews it just looks silly imagine a magician with just one trick
Starting point is 01:24:19 or a TV with only one channel if you find this exciting and worth a trip then go see the poorly built building these people are just soulless I'm not saying it's amazing well it's actually pretty amazing that it's still going but I mean you know I'm not saying it's the greatest
Starting point is 01:24:37 building in the world but fuck me just lighten up you know everything's every building cowed and strighting proopoly. We're going way over to the far east for this one. Oh dear. Right. We're in China.
Starting point is 01:24:54 I could only find one suitable review for this one. It's not even forbidden. It's exposed to everyone. So tired. I know we have to walk a long time, but it's big. And I can't think of a single nice thing about it. It's not even forbidden. That's a big, big, big, big hint on what it could be.
Starting point is 01:25:16 This is a trickier one because I guess, so it's not as used to... It's not a wall then. Oh, right. If that's a big hint, then yeah, it's not the wall. But that also, you have to walk for a while to, for this one, this was a recurring theme of like just because it was so big, you had to walk like 45 minutes to properly, like, see it all.
Starting point is 01:25:37 And people were upset about that. And that was like 50% the reviews were complaining about that. I won't be upset if you don't get this one. I just thought that review was quite funny. Well, when you know what it is. I'm genuinely drawing a blank. I'm not sure that it could be. Yeah, me too.
Starting point is 01:25:55 The Forbidden City in China. I think Beijing. Can't say I've heard of that, actually. I think it's famous, but it's not like a standout thing. I think when you see a picture, it'd be like, oh, that. Oh, is it the big sort of massive greenery right in the middle of the city or something? something. Yeah. Yeah, that thing. Not greenery. It's just, it's just a big city that was built a long time ago, but it's entirely walled off. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I've seen this. So you have to walk a long time to get there, or are they complaining that you have to walk a long time to get around it and see it?
Starting point is 01:26:30 I think, yeah, get around it. Because I think most often you're not allowed into the city. So you have to go on the, like, the wall around the outside. Right. I don't think I'd particularly enjoy walking all the way around a wall. But I could, I would say, certainly go to the front of it. Yeah. Imposing. I wouldn't leave a one-star review after the fact, and that's what separates us from the hip. All right.
Starting point is 01:26:51 Let's take a flight to the United States of America, in particular, the East Coast, New York, filled with many, many a famous landmark. We start with this first spot. Upsetting, reads the title. We went there with a pass that got us in, and I wished I had not gone, gone. It was so upsetting.
Starting point is 01:27:13 This was my least favorite. Is that ground zero? Yeah. Oh, Christ. I mean, yes, but. Yeah, it's kind of sort of the point of going. You need to know what you're going in for. Yeah, I've been there myself.
Starting point is 01:27:31 It's very emotional. It's a weird atmosphere to it. It's like really, really touching. But then, I mean, to go there not to expect. to be upset by it is slightly weird and to then leave a one-star review
Starting point is 01:27:46 of a one year another review was sad I was overwhelmed by this it was not terrible I felt terrible as I did not know this would make me so emotional
Starting point is 01:27:56 and so dear bless bless me that's like that's essentially a five-star review because it's done his job
Starting point is 01:28:04 it seems to be point no one like you don't go to places like you know you don't go to museums of you know like tragedy
Starting point is 01:28:14 and you know like war crimes and things like yeah like 9-11 and you don't leave a five-star review because you had a great time you leave a five-star review
Starting point is 01:28:26 because it was poignant and thought-provoking dear dearie me and this is our last of the last attraction of the brunch the brunch
Starting point is 01:28:37 Jesus Michael your word to flop it out your mouth hold on have I got one that's slightly less revealing than that nope they're all pretty revealing so let's I love the Grand Canyon it was fantastic title of this one is why is she green fucking out out of all the colours the person who created this beautiful lady
Starting point is 01:29:03 could have chosen why did they go for green did they make the statue of liberty green I'm going to Google whether she was originally I think it was iron or something it's oxidised because it's like oxidised there's a lot of rooftops in Oxford that are green because they haven't changed colour over the years yeah it was apparently red
Starting point is 01:29:27 before it was green it was like copper coppery red oh well like the angel of the north yeah and it's oxidised a few more reviews for this one Again, abhorrent color. We recently visited this establishment and we were appalled by the color.
Starting point is 01:29:43 It was mankie and the smell was trampy. How are you surprised by the color by the time you get there? Have you never seen a photo? It's a big green, isn't it? God, somebody needs to give it a clean. And the last one, nothing special. It's just a statue in the middle of the water. Not as big as we thought.
Starting point is 01:30:04 It's also very expensive to go near. Yeah. to go near oh dear it wasn't worth the money really thanks juan jay from new mould in UK oh wow not as big as we thought
Starting point is 01:30:17 oh dear you know just a statue in the middle of water isn't it that's what it is shit isn't it I mean when you look at things like that nothing's impressive oh it's just a building yeah it's just some triangles
Starting point is 01:30:27 in the middle of desert I don't understand it's not very nice colour I don't like green no one likes green why they make a green great pyramid of the geese just bricks just bricks
Starting point is 01:30:37 Just bricks, isn't it? I might be interested in the cement, possibly the design. It's just bricks. It's not even that big. Why is it orange? There was a few complaining about the, what's it called? The Golden Gate Bridge was a potential one, and there was several of you who was complaining about the colour,
Starting point is 01:30:58 either it not being as orange as they hoped, or it wasn't actually gold, and they're upset about that. Yeah. That was. It's just, yeah. We've done enough touring of the world, thoroughly feel broken down by these individuals. Wow.
Starting point is 01:31:12 Thank you for joining me. Is that all our questions and our things? I think it is. I think we've hit an hour and a half with a meaty bit of bamzuki. So let's pull it some chunky bams. Excellent. Thank you so much for listening, everybody. Who would like to know what's coming out on the Vidiot's YouTube channel three years ago?
Starting point is 01:31:34 They would. They would. You're not asked, Peter? you don't really care I do too but I think they care even more okay that's a nice safe
Starting point is 01:31:43 alright here we go we've got worst games ever America's 10 most wanted personal dick rocket the sex Olympics game
Starting point is 01:31:51 for a featuring booth thanks booth Peter gets hit by a car again Art Attack PC oh that was the animation we made
Starting point is 01:32:01 that was a good and I like that Vidiot's live Twitch stream eggs for barked and fatal frame I think that was Mikey and I were doing the spooky stream.
Starting point is 01:32:11 Yeah, someone was asking me about eggs for Bart the other day when I was streaming Simpsons hit and run and I was like, I do not remember that. Yeah. Which is loud. Very rubbish. Post-sum tat number 34,
Starting point is 01:32:22 happy birthday, Mikey. It's his birthday. Wish him a happy birthday. When I got my favorite the best post-sum tat ever with the non-vegan king. Yeah, we really thought that three didn't we do it spectacular
Starting point is 01:32:39 Marvel Spider-Man upside-down challenge that was a piece of cake episode where I think I had a cold and I was laying off the sofa upside down
Starting point is 01:32:48 and I had to play Spider-Man got we clutched at straws with that episode didn't we you were not well that day horrible time worst games ever Bad Boys 2
Starting point is 01:32:56 nice rubbish games Bonanza ZX Spectrum that's another that's a booth it's another booth special video
Starting point is 01:33:05 it's live Twitch stream Swamp Sim Luigi's Mansion And something else We were all there for that That was another Spooktober stream even
Starting point is 01:33:15 Fighting Women WWE2K19 VDIETS live Dark Souls remastered number three I'm going to skip the Vidiats live stuff Because we get quite a few Quite a few of those vods now in here Potty is episode 17
Starting point is 01:33:30 Great stuff Postum tat number 35 Golden Bat Buddha Oh, yeah Oh my God, yeah That's bringing back to one of two people Yeah, we did Medieval ruling
Starting point is 01:33:45 Age of Empires 2 part one This is the beginning of a prove it A medieval themed to prove it This was the first part of the let's play And finally We had worst games ever All Star Water Sports Which is nowhere near as sexy
Starting point is 01:33:59 As it sounds actually No, it was a bad game It was not good A quick reminder that next episode will technically be our Halloween episode. So it will be made clear in the question post that it should be spook-themed questions, but that will be our spooky podcast. It will be the spook one. So please be excited for that.
Starting point is 01:34:20 Mikey, there's some kind of shop, isn't there? I think you're ringing some bells. Oh, yeah, you're right. You are right. If you head over to store. you'll find a wonderful selection of yogscast related goodies and we've even managed to sneak in our own little corner on that website which they haven't noticed we're still on there
Starting point is 01:34:41 so nobody tell them nobody tell them we're still part of the network we are we are please don't tell them though please don't tell them well maybe every time you buy a t-shirt they make money oh my god remember we're here and they'll kick us out well if you want to see us booted from the yogs cast why don't you go Buy a shirt. We've got a lovely selection of t-shirts, mugs, and hoodie for you to wear and or use,
Starting point is 01:35:08 depending on the article. And if you feel like saving a little bit of money, you can use code vidiates at checkout for 10% off absolutely everything on the Yogscast store. Not just our stuff. That works on everything, including a hoodie. Yeah, with the reference I'm not sure about on it. And some T-T-T-T shirts.
Starting point is 01:35:30 T-T-T-T-T-T-T-shirts of best of all, you can use it on our stuff and you get a nice little bit of money off and a little bit of little few coins go to us which would be lovely. That's called Vidyots at checkout. God, my store commercials are getting rope here every week.
Starting point is 01:35:43 I need to horn them in. It's a good store, go and buy our things. Thank you. Yes, thank you. YouTube, Twitter, Facebook, all.com, forward slash Vidiotts official. Vyatio.
Starting point is 01:35:53 Vyatts official. Yes, this is the time. this is the time is it hang on let me check what's the time it's going out when does this episode go out the fifth
Starting point is 01:36:07 yes okay yeah next Tuesday the fifth right on Sunday I'm going to be doing a live stream so I hope to see people there
Starting point is 01:36:17 will be raising some money for charities so do come along Twitch.tv forward slash video it's official there we are dates are difficult when we record things in advance
Starting point is 01:36:25 I forget where things are streamlups.com forward slash potty It's donations, three pounds or more to get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show. Thank you so much to everybody who has joined Pod Squad this week. Once again, Mikey kick us off. These absolute legends, Mr. Black. Wendy Miller, Trunter from the Lothian area, an insignificant donation.
Starting point is 01:36:47 Oaky, that's their name. Sorry, I should have clarified that first time. That's not me ripping into someone. That's their name. Oh, no, that's an insignificant donation. Okie doaks, spoky doca, raindrop joy, the very generous Samuel de Barber, DBP, Simp Squad, Lord Brotovich, Pro Trainer, I can't believe you've done this, RIPP, Shepard Pie, Made of Man, sorry, Made of Shepherd.
Starting point is 01:37:14 God, Michael, get your head in the game. Shepherd Pie, Made of Shepherd. There we go. Keith Cuntwin, the generous DeLuxington, man or woman. Alfa Alpha serpent There we go Thanks Got it
Starting point is 01:37:33 Rejected Pottie Its names Carr gets hit By a Peter And Pingu's Gay Dad Cheers Cheers you lot
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Starting point is 01:37:49 and Chucky Bin La doll The very generous Ami Hang on Ami Ami do Sange, one vowel from Shira, who was also very generous. Michael Cheggson-Yare. Mikey's
Starting point is 01:38:03 roller-scatting event. Stephen Skodes. Slap him with bumpus. Ashton in a croppedop-top shock. Deep Heat D.P. With D.B.P. Dick in the bumgolo. Fuckable Yakult. Finn Tristam. Pubeless Peter. And I sneezed. Oh shit. Literally. Also, I have absolutely no idea if it is Ami Dosanj, but it sounds right. And I feel like that's what we called them previously. Yeah, I think you were, or you or one of us was corrected at one point, and then we knew that it was supposed to be Ami DeSanche. Let us know if we got it wrong.
Starting point is 01:38:40 Keep forgetting. Let us know. Also, we have Caroline. My lawyer will call you. Please, Peter, it's a hot pot. Patrick, you flippin' idiot. Mikey Corleone. Clue wouldn't download a house.
Starting point is 01:38:52 Mr. Macker. Just keep swimming, Ash. shitler's greasy ring fush unshops beans motherfucker a good toad in my hole puma pants prince beef cakes the extremely generous gregoor monkey and monkey chippy that's it jeremy beadle wank challenge mike light or is uh caroline where is shedkey and a succulent chinese mitch there we are thank you so much everyone who joined pod squad this week remember streamlabs dot com forward slash poddy donations, spooky questions for next time. Mikey, where can people find you on the internet?
Starting point is 01:39:30 At Paraboy on Twitter. Best place to keep up with all my shenanigans. You can watch me drunk saying poggers. I think I said that last time. That's still the highlight. Poggers. Pogers. Absolutely, that's poggers, that is.
Starting point is 01:39:43 And on Twitch, when I stream occasionally, I think now the weather's starting to get crapper. I'll start streaming again soon. I promise. I'm sorry. I don't stream. that often. Ah, thank you.
Starting point is 01:39:56 My God, Johnson. Peter, where can we be found? We can be found together at Team Triple Jump on social media, but also on YouTube and Twitch, where we are making videos and doing live streams all the flippin' time. But also separately, we are at That Peter Austin on Twitter and at Confused underscore Dude on Twitter. No. Why not leave us an iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice.
Starting point is 01:40:23 It helps something to do with Al Gore's rhythms. Thank you so much, everybody, for listening and supporting us. We really, really super-duper appreciate you. You're all lovely and wonderful, and we love you, quite frankly. And if we could marry you, we would, but we can't. So there are laws, I think. Do we have a final question? I said, do we have a final question?
Starting point is 01:40:43 I will hear no more on the legality of marrying everyone. Will you marry me is my question to everybody. Why did they make the words the monkey? remember years ago if a monkey could talk what would it sound like said, will you marry me?
Starting point is 01:40:59 Will you marry me? Will you marry me? Fucking. Why choose that phrase? That's the question. Why did, when they artificially created monkey speech
Starting point is 01:41:10 using science, why did it say, will you marry me? Will you marry me? For those who don't know what that is, that's really a confusing way to end the podcast. I'll just Google it.
Starting point is 01:41:23 I'll stick in the audio clip here at the end. It's not even Halloween. I enjoy that. Scarring. It was like, it was just for context as to why they did it and why it matters. It was based on the science of like the makeup of a monkey's throat and mouth. It was, they were able to create a fake voice based on that information. It wasn't like that they used a real biological.
Starting point is 01:41:53 head. They did it with a computer and that's why it was amazing at the time because they'd made a believable voice out of just information. Just the worst. So that was, that's why they did it.
Starting point is 01:42:07 Will you marry Peter? That's the question that we're meeting you with. So do let us know and look after yourselves. We'll catch you in a couple of weeks. Goodbye everybody. Goodbye. Bye. You know,
Starting point is 01:42:24 I'm gonna, you know, and a no and Thank you.

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