Podiots - Podiots: Episode 94 - Burns Night

Episode Date: February 1, 2022

Peter's learning a murderous instrument, Mikey's visiting the world's worst convention, and Ben's trying sell the Eiffel Tower. Donate £3 or more to get a shout out and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/podiotsdonations/ New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord:  http://bit.ly/vidiotsofficialdiscord Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump Mikey's Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/parrotboy Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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poddy it's i was going to think of a special occasion but there's nothing in january is it it's just a desolate wasteland it's the special burns night episode welcome oh oh burns week burns fortnight burns yeah because it won't be out until several days after burns night so Burns Week Yeah Your number one Stop Shop, podcast for all of your Robert Burns

poetry And sort of Scottish nationalism Good Presented by three Englishmen Yeah Of course Just how Scotland likes it I was expecting more bonfires

From searching it But no there's a lot of haggis in front of me at the minute Yeah There's no There's no burning on burning Burns Night. Boo! This is bullshit.

You guys ever celebrated Burns Night? Never. I don't think I've ever even read up about it until this very moment. With the professionals on the matter now. Is it a national holiday? See, these are the kind of questions we need to ask for the Burns Night podcast. Is it a national holiday in Scotland? It's the kind of thing we should know.

Yeah. I think it probably is, but I don't know. Because if it is, I feel hard done by as someone from a country that doesn't. have that national Yeah, where's our extra day off? I want one. When's International Men's Day is what I want to know. Yeah, it's about time we've got to choose.

Question on everyone's lips. We've had it too hard for too long. Yeah. We're making our voices known like never before. Yeah. I demand not only an international men's day, but an international white, cis, Western males day. Great.

You know? The sign that doesn't exist is already a clear indicator of oppression on those guys, isn't that? Absolutely. God, we really hit the ground running here. Burns Night and oppression. It's a stormer. It's going to be a splendid episode. Hello, everybody, and welcome to Poddy.

It's the official. Vidiates. Podcast. It's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us, where everybody brings a thing how long to talk about. I'm Ben. I'm Peter. And I'm Michael. Hi, boy.

Hello. Pretty good, thanks. How are you? Yeah, no bad. Second podcast. Second podcast, yes? Yes. Second podcast of 2022.

Oh boy. We're going on strong. How do we feel? pumped up, energized, and ready to sell. Sell. Just sell hopes and dreams. That's what this podcast's all about, right? Yeah, okay.

I mean, I can get on board with that. We could do with a little positivity. January is a bit of a shitty month, isn't it? Yeah. Known hopes and dreams traffickers. Oh, God. We are. A lorry was stopped outside the channel tunnel, filled with hopes and dreams.

Yeah, that had not been declared. at customs. They're awaiting deportation. We'll have none of those there, says Boris. There's now going to be lasting supply chain issues and it may be a while before we can replenish stock. Taking them back to Europe where they belong. Yeah, exactly.

Exactly. None of that. None of that muck over here, thank you. We'll be miserable. And that's the way we like it. Yeah. It's a conversational podcast. I was just going to let that hang.

I just wanted that to just sort of hang. really breathe it in. I felt really uncomfortable about that. Can we, do you reckon we can make it more uncomfortable? Oh, absolutely. You can always make it more uncomfortable. If we just sort of. Oh, it's quite nasty, actually, isn't it?

That really went on for a long time there. I was really, I was settling in, but, you know. I was bubbling up. That was awful. Well, you are the hopes and dreams vendor, Mikey. Damn right So we shan't delay any longer Hey do you have you enjoyed

What you've heard so far Have you? Have you? Why? I bet you have you have Why? Why have you enjoyed it? Let us know or don't You know that's also fine If you have though and you fancy supporting us and thinking Wow that was top quality silence there that I heard And I must pay a premium for it You can go to streamlabs.com forward slash potty it's donations

Donate three pounds or more And you'll get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show And you'll get our everlasting Lasting love and appreciation, you help us to keep doing what we're doing in our spare time. We love doing it, but the money, man, it really helps. It really helps. And it also helps us by Luceet, which we have sent precisely one message this year about sorting out. So it is happening.

Yeah. You know, things are, yeah, it will. It will happen. I promise. We have three different squad, splatoons, groups here. It's split between the three of us. Mikey has the first group. We begin with the pumpy platoon who proudly

profit, well, didn't profit, but helped support that five seconds of silence. Thank you all very much. We begin with the powerful, the generous plops a hoi. And they say, I have money. Now you have money. We're all but cogs in the capitalist machine. Please spend previously on pick and mix or whatever the fucking NFT is. Kis-Kee-Kis.

We'll do. Thank you, Plops. Next up is the generous Wordle warrior. Thise. My partner of nine years left me in November and I've been really struggling to cope. However, the Triple Jump YouTube channel, these podcasts and cultaholic have helped me smile and laugh in this very bleak time. So this, a very small thank you to all. Love you boys. Love you too, Werdle. Love you too. Hope you doing good. Yeah. Glad we can help. Bless you. Queen clit of the elven cunts. Wowy. What a string of syllables. That was a really upsetting

sequence of words, that's what I'm trying to say. It's powerful. I don't know if I enjoyed that. But we move on to the friendly face of Pro Trainer. And the generous, gay for Mullman, and they say, Hello, lads, recently started a new job after two years of unemployment. Thanks for helping me keep saying in that time.

Just wanted to give a little something back. Cheers again, and all the best, Brandon. Cheers, lad. Congrats, Brandon. Yeah, well done. You got Jason Allenby. Naked Chegwin's work event. Very good.

Katie Kin's Solo. David's Dick in Son, lovely. Ben saved my drunk uncle. O'Wagather Christy. Big Titty Jesus 42. Mr. David Dickinson, Donak, O'7. And Mr. Blobby becomes a fireman. Thank you very much.

In the tiny troupe this fortnight is Arse Face, Mr. Black. Dabatha Christi Oh I see Caroline Where's the Stopcock Stucalicious I'm trapped in Mikey's garden

Kevin from Con Hawkman 105 Steven Skodes Lord Rottovich Yadar sells Avon Joseph Starlinia You know it's all about The Coom

Trelex who was exceedingly generous and you're about to be given enough clues to work out how generous. They said I feel like I've been neglecting my favourite good boys. So here is a dollar for each,

a dollar for each of you for every episode you've made. But it's in Canadian Loonies, which I believe is about 18 UK cent monies. Sorry. Okay, love you, bye. Wow, wee. Traylis. Thank you. That's like a question you're getting a maths exam.

Yeah. Thank you very much. And the very last one on my list is Wilma Boll is be kissed. Have I done that right? Will my Boles be kissed? Oh, I see. There you go. I thought that was an uppercase I.

Will my Boles be kissed? Will my Boles be kissed? I like that. That's cute. Finally, we have the fast crew. We've got Mike Hunt, Sting, Saylott. There we are. I hope I've ruined that for you.

Councilman Dexterous, I'm in your walls, Neil. Pingu's dad burnt down the igloo. Come Tuesday, Mr. Macca, the very generous reggae, reggae horse who says, Hey, boys, all girls, I recently came into possession of a Dave Benson Phillips poster through a friend of my dad. And who boy, let me tell you, waking up to that smiling face is worse than any paralysis, demon. Oh, no.

Thank you so much. Thank you, Rachel. Thank you. Jewels here I did know shid or fard Good Finally got closure on the matter

Yeah Cunther McDombo Just keep swimming Ash Sorry drunk last donation Phase 1 collect underpants Phase 2 question marks Phase 3

Profit Good That's good Wonderful ordering Well done Yeah did it And finally Fin Tristam

Thank you everyone That's your Pod Squad For this week If you'd like to get a Pod squad shout out At the beginning In the end of the podcast Streamlabs.com

forward slash potty it's donations three pounds or more we love you we love you we love you we love you would you guys like a quest john oh absolutely speaking of sad january we go to don't donna donna donna donna d o n a g h donna yeah donna donna donna i suppose okay at oh very good mikey love thank you sorry say that again for me i said i donna He said it better than that. He said it. It was way better at the first. He had to be there.

You had to be that, but you weren't there. Sorry. Let's just roll on, please. I was too busy trying to desperately read Donas. At La Breaethe Dona. I've got no idea what's going on. It's our language. January can be a rough month.

What's your go-to comfort watch, be it a series or film? Now, I know we've spoken about our comfort series before, but I thought maybe we could be a bit more specific and just talk about things we've watched this January that we've enjoyed. Oh, okay. Does that work for you, Borm? Yeah.

Yes, it does. I mean, I think almost everything I've watched this January certainly what I can think of isn't necessarily a comfort show. But I've watched a couple of true crime things recently. I saw one about Mormonism. And there's like this whole trade of like Mormon documents that's really big in America and in the Mormon church. Because Mormonism is only like, well, it's American, therefore it's only a couple hundred years old at most.

It means that it's like a modern faith that like the documents that are its basis still exist out there. And that's why there's this huge trade about it. And it's about, like, someone who sets off car bombs to kill people who are trading in this stuff. I'm trying to remember the name of it. It was on Netflix. Hang on, let me eat them. I'll Google it. Okay.

Is it Murder Among the Mormons, by it? Yes, that'll be it. Yeah. It sounds like a Dr. Zeus book. Isn't it? Yeah. Green Eggs and... ham but yeah it was like really compelling um and then as well as that i saw this like crazy

thing about a con man in fact that's that's a really recent thing i think it's only just come out so it's been like trending on netflix um it was called the the puppet master or the puppeteer or something and it's about this guy here i mean i don't want to spoil it too much because it's one of those where you just can't stop watching and there's just new developments and cliffhangers at the end of every episode. But again, it's like a true crime documentary by Netflix about this bloke who like tells people he works for MI5 and he like just is able to reel them in. And then he is, he like has them in his car and he's like driving them all over the country and they think that he's protecting them from the IRA and it's just absolutely insane that this thing

happened and that he managed to do it for so long and to so many people and the guy is still out there with the mother of this family he went to prison for like some stuff and then he got he got out and now the whole reason the show has been made is because this family their mom has like gone off with him and they they have like a little bit of contact with her and whenever they speak to her she says like she's not there under duress she knows that he's a convicted con man but she loves him and like she believes everything he's saying to her and they're out there and they don't really know where they are or what they're doing and it's just wild it's unbelievable um so lots of fun yes yeah so certainly not uh lovely warming

comforting stuff to watch with your january but if you really want to lean into the depression and the cold dark nights, then go for those two. A puppet, puppet master, I think it's called, and murder among the Mormons. Excellent. Wow. To my list. I've started paddling in the waters of Alan Partridge properly after years.

I'm never really watching any of it. So I've had a good watcher of all of I'm Alan Partridge, and that's just, it is fantastic. It's very good. It's very cringy, horrible goodness and a big fan of it. Give me a second series. Oh, it's fantastic. It's so pitiful to watch this man clamber through life.

Yeah. It's spectacular. And, of course, his newer series this time, as more of like a spoof on, just horribly benign, daytime TV. Yeah. Is that the one way he looks into the role after someone falls in? Yeah, I watched that.

That was brilliantly uncomfortable, wasn't it? It's so good. Yeah. I really love, because someone who despises most daytime TV, it just perfectly sums up just how nothing it all is yeah yeah oh it's it's fantastic and then ironically you've got

what's his name richard madeley actually presents uh is it this morning or good morning britain or something occasionally like he will just dip into that and the whole thing is that he's just accidental partridge the man constantly so it's really like reality

kind of mirroring fiction and god yeah horrendous I can't remember any specifically, but I love the, you know, the segments that they cut away to, especially the Partridge presented ones. And they're all just like really tedious. Again, I wish I could, I wish I could name one in particular because I only watched it last year. But it was just, just his presenting style is just so comedically naff that I just, I love it. You know, he's talking about the most boring stuff.

He's getting into his car and he puts on his driving gloves and stuff. and it's just so, it's so good. It is a work of art. Yeah, like properly does justice to the awkward, clunky style of everything. I think, yeah, like you're saying that, just the weird shots and him walking around these places trying to, trying to report on things,

but really having no idea what's going on. Yeah, you can say what you like about, like, what's the top, you know, the best kind of sitcom or like British comedy or something of all time. And, like, that's hugely up for debate, even like a top 10. But certainly as a character, like Alan Partridge has got to be one of the very best characters alone, like, ever created.

It's so believable that a person like that could exist. I love it. It's 20 years strong as well, so it's got, well, over 20 years, I think. Yeah, yeah, it's been going for a long old time. It's got legs. It sure do. So it goes. Are you, Ben?

Well, I watched Encanto. It's so good. It's so good. The music is phenomenal and it's been stuck in my head and I've been listening to it on Spotify as well, all arranged by Lynn Manuel Miranda. And it's flipping excellent. So I'd recommend that. Delightful animated movie film. If you've got the Disney Plus, you can watch it on there. But it's, yeah, really, really good. It's still in the cinema as well, so I might have to get along. I was surprised by how much I enjoyed it I think it's just it's so lovely and there's what I like the most about it and I've seen a lot of people talk about

is that there's no villain there's no like archetypal villain it's just sort of the strife is internal for a lot of the characters and it's all about them overcoming and accepting things and it's lovely

it's just a really lovely film oh lovely I recommend it very much besides that TV wise I watched The Witcher season two. Oh yeah. Everyone loves to stare at grubby Henry Cavill, right?

Yeah. Everyone was that. It was good. I enjoyed it more than the first season, which obviously chronologically, well, it wasn't. And that's why it was so confusing because it time hopped all over the place. But the second season was linear, and that was great. And I really like that. I'd recommend Tacoma F.D. as well is a great comedy series about a fire department

in a US town that gets sort of an absurd amount of rainfall so they're not that busy and when they do go out it's just like a kid is stuck in the well or someone's got his dick stuck in something like a can and he needs he needs help

it's good I'm on board with this it's good I enjoy it I think it's quite fun it's not one of the mainstream sitcoms but it's pretty good I would recommend it very much nice thank you very much Penn that's all right

Who would like to do a thing? Yes. Go on. Mine's a very short thing today. A tiny Peter. It is a tiny Peter, tiny thing. But it's something I've wanted to bring along for a long time. And I've just not because it is so short.

But I just love that it exists. So I probably really built it up there as something fantastic. It's not something wild. But it just seems. My seat. It seemed like prime potty. It's material, that's all. Okay.

Are you boys aware of the glass harmonica? It's that instrument that has like spinning glass bowls and you wet your fingers and then you rub your fingers on it. Let me post a picture. Oh, like when you play glasses filled with water or something? It's exactly the same principle as when you rub the rim of a wine glass. And if you have the right pressure. and if your finger is wet, it will, like, resonate the wine glass.

Oh, it looks like some kind of giant sperm from a deep sea creature. Yeah, it's a bit strange, isn't it? So, let me read to you about the glass harmonica, because there is an aspect of glass harmonica culture and history that is very strange that I happened upon recently. This is a weird Wikipedia. We go to Wikipedia itself. The glass harmonica, also known as the glass harmonica,

with no H, the glass harmonium, the bowl organ, the hydrocrystallophone, or simply the harmonica or harmonica, Jesus, is a type of musical instrument that uses a series of glass bowls

or goblets graduated in size to produce musical tones by means of friction. Instruments of this type are known as friction idiophones. Now, Mikey, got a little, a little treat for you here.

This is a little section called Forerunners. Because its sounding portion is made of glass, the glass harmonica is a type of crystallophone. The phenomenon of rubbing a wet finger around the rim of a wine goblet to produce tones is documented back to Renaissance times. Galileo considered the phenomenon, as did Athanius Kirker.

Oh, that's on him. and then gradually over time it was sort of turned into an instrument so the effect has been known a very long time but the Irish musician Richard Pockridge is typically credited as the first to play an instrument composed of glass vessels by rubbing his fingers around the rims

beginning in the 1940s he performed in London on a set of upright goblets filled with varying amounts of water his career was cut short by a fire in his room which killed him and destroyed his apparatus citation needed it says or did it did it happen

but I came in a bit soon but here you go Mikey Benjamin Franklin invented a radically new arrangement of the glasses in 1761 after seeing water filled wine glasses played

at Edward Delaval by Edward Delaval at Cambridge in England in May 1761 Franklin worked with London glass blower Charles James to build

one and it had its world premiere in early 1762, played by Marianne Davies. So that was essentially the instrument that we have today. Benjamin Franklin himself, known fart expert. Yes, writer of farts and writer about second marriages as well. Also, in between writing those letters, created musical instruments. What a boy. He created that. But we now skip ahead to a section of the ask.

called purported dangers. Oh no. The instrument's popularity did not last far beyond the 18th century. This may have been due to the inability to amplify the volume so as not to be drowned out by other instruments. But some claim this was due to strange rumours

that using the instrument caused both musicians and their listeners to go mad. Oh my God. It is a matter of conjecture how pervasive that belief was. All the commonly cited examples of this rumour seem to be German, if not confined, to Vienna. One example of alleged effects from playing the glass harmonica was noted by German musicologist Johann Friedrich Rochelz in the Algemyna musicalische Zeitung. The harmonica excessively stimulates the nerves, plunges the player into a nagging depression,

and hence into a dark and melancholy mood. that is an apt method for slow self-annihilation. Jesus. He then has three bullet points. Number one, if you are suffering from any nervous disorder, you should not play it. Number two, if you are not yet ill, you should not play it excessively. Not yet ill. What a strange way of saying healthy.

I know. And number three, if you are feeling melancholy, you should not play it, or else play uplifting pieces. Okay, thank you there, Johan. That's quite the warning label that come with a quite pleasant sounding instrument. Marianne Davies, who I mentioned earlier, she's the one who debuted Benjamin Franklin's model.

She also played flute and harpsichord and was a young woman said to be related to Franklin, it says, in little hyphen clause there, became proficient enough at playing the harmonica to offer public performances. After touring for many years in duo performances, her celebrated vocalist sister, she was also said to have been afflicted with a melancholia attributed to the plaintive tones of the instrument. Marianne Kirk Gessner, which is a different

Marianne, was an harmonica player as well. She died at the age of 39 of pneumonia or an illness much like it. However, many others, including Franklin, lived long lives. Okay, right. Well, we'll see how this goes. For a time, the harmonica achieved a general in vogue, but like most fads, that for the harmonica eventually passed. That's a slightly strange wording. It had been claimed the sound producing mechanism did not generate sufficient power to fill large halls that were becoming home to modern string instruments. The instrument was made with glass and subject to easy breakage, and perhaps that did not help either. By 1820, the harmonica had mostly disappeared from frequent public performance, perhaps because music

musical fashions were changing. But also, according to another article here, as well as Marianne Kirch-Gessner passing away, allegedly due to the spooky tones of Franklin's harmonica, a young child in Germany also died during an harmonica performance, which resulted in some towns banning the instrument for good. Aside from the physical toll, the instrument supposedly took on players and listeners.

Some also believe that the high-pitched sounds summoned Spirits of the Dead. Or that the harmonica had magical powers and in some cases drove individuals mad, as we've said. It was reported that it even caused listeners to commit suicide. It's like the ring, like at the end of the tape you die in seven days, but instead of that, it's at the end of a lovely performance. In seven days you'll become very sad. But there's one last thought here. A modern version of the purported dangers claims that players suffered lead poisoning

because armonicas were made of lead glass. Lead poisoning, of course, the symptoms of which include kind of neural issues. Like it can give you physical, like tingling in your hands and feet, but it can also give you seizures. You can like go into a coma. And I don't know if it can. quote-unquote drive you mad, but, I mean, it can certainly affect your, you know, your nervous system. However, there is no known scientific basis for the theory that merely touching lead

glass can lead to lead poisoning. Lead poisoning was common in the 18th and early 19th centuries, both for harmonica players and non-players alike. Doctors prescribed lead compounds for a long list of ailments, and lead or lead oxide was used as a food preservative and in cookware and eating utensils. Good, good. Trace amounts of lead that the harmonica players in Franklin's Day received from their instruments would likely have been dwarfed by the lead they were receiving from other sources, such as lead content paint used to mark visual identification of the bowls to the players.

So essentially no one really knows why people were seemingly going a bit mad from either playing or listening to this instrument. Some people thought it could be down to lead poisoning, but there's no real scientific basis for picking up lead through your fingers rubbing it on lead glass. And everyone was getting lead from other sources in those days anyway. So a bit of a mystery. This poor instrument was just scapegoat for everyone's issues Yeah, yeah, I guess it was just people were You know Devil instrument, get it out of our town

Get the spook piano out of here Absolutely, yeah They were just having issues for other reasons And maybe some of them happened to have been to a glass harmonica concert That's strange It's like the Lavender Town theme song of its day It is, just like that

Kids die Yeah, indeed So there you go I stumbled across that Like well not the other day Like a few weeks ago really And I thought Yeah bring that along

Fantastic Thank you so much Peter You're welcome I want to forward to the return of the Yeah I want to look On the Wikipedia article There's a Like a royalty free piece

That you can just click a Let me join to share it with you Warning you may die Yeah well exactly Yeah you've got to be careful About halfway down the article on the right-hand side under a sheet of music.

Let's have a listen. Oh, it's very spooky and a theory, isn't it? Oh, wow. Yeah. It's a bit Harry Potter theme song. I think it is the same instrument as what John Williams used for the Harry Potter. It must be.

It sounds exactly the same. God, sounds amazing. I want to see it all. They do still exist. A lot of the old ones, or most of the old ones don't exist anymore. They've been destroyed, either accidentally or on purpose, I suppose, but

there are some modern ones that have been rebuilt, so it's very easy to, I mean, you can just Google it and people are playing it on YouTube and stuff and not dying, so if anyone at home, as far as we know. We're all dying, really, at all times.

Wow. But yeah, if you want to have a listen, then head to the Wikipedia page or to YouTube or whatever. There's plenty out there. Yeah, check it out. Nice. Well, we've got another question here. from Paul at Paul Zarember 16 who says if your home was on fire

everyone that you live with in all of your important documents and money are safe what would you save that is important to you a funco pop are your favourite gaming stuff Billy Clay Walrus okay love you bye oh that's a good question I forgot about the little stash of video stuff I've got to keep that going yeah what would you save though

would you say I know exactly what I'd save actually it's a piece of trash that I've carried with me for other six years now and I refuse to ever get rid of it. Okay. It must have been like my second year of uni. I went down to London to visit a friend. He went to go watch a live screening of the room, famously the worst film ever made. And it was a lovely screening event, lovely big cinema, the director, one of the main actors was there to do like an absolutely unhinged Q&A afterwards. They're all absolutely mental people. It was great fun. And much like the Rocky Horror Picture Show, the film has like little traditions that you do during the film. Kind of makes it

of like a sing-along interactive experience. And one of my favorite bits was, for some reason, the kind of set designer for the film, if they had one, just decided to place frame pictures of plastic spoons around in the house. And so just like in random shots, these two characters have like a really serious discussion, just in the background, there's a framed picture of some spoons. And so whenever one of those frame pictures appears on screen,

the whole audience erupts screaming spoons and throws hundreds upon hundreds of plastic, at the screen every time. And so I've got the signed Blu-ray, signed by the two guys. And inside the box, I've got a plastic spoon that I picked up from the floor before the end of the screen. It means a lot to me, Dammer, even if it is just a bit of rubbish. Brilliant.

Special spoon. I love that. Yeah, a special spoon. Nice. What about you, Peter? I mean, I could, I don't know if it would count as cheating, but I have a little tiny, I mean, it's not tiny, tiny, but I guess. almost like a child-sized suitcase

that has just all of my precious things in it. So I could very easily just grab the little suitcase. It's about the size of like a laptop bag. And it's kind of an old-fashioned, like hard, like the kind of suitcase you'd see on the sort of kids being evacuated to the country in World War II. Haddington has one.

Yeah, it's that kind of thing. A little one of those. And I've got a whole bunch of things in there. I've got like, you know, like ticket stubs from shows I've been to. And I've got corks from popped bottles of Prosecco from like special occasions, like, you know, people's birthdays or Christmases and New Year's and stuff, which I then write on what it's from. So I've got loads of these corks from different times.

So if I could, you know, just be cheeky. say, well, I just grab my suitcase of all my, like, keepsakes, then that's what I do. But if not, um, I don't think there's anything, in the chaos you've tripped over the suitcase and the contents are spilled everywhere. Oh, no. I mean, I can't even think what's in there. So I can't really give an answer for like that. But I, I also have like a sort of a vidiates shrine in a cupboard. So maybe, maybe something from there or, um, I'm trying to think. think like some of my stuff is at the office as well like i've got like video video game tat uh but that that wouldn't be burning in my fire so have you still got those um painted converse we all

received yeah i've still been good to put on your feet got my converse i've got some i've got a load of people's art and like cards that they sent us when we were you know wrapping up um i've got billy clay walrus who needs super gluing a little bit he's slightly broken but he'll be fine So what I'm hearing is that there's too many treasures inside So you're going to go down with the fire And the arrest with the Vidyat's memorabilia Possibly I mean and everything So I've got the case

And then the case itself is in this like very thin cupboard Which has shelves in it And one of those shelves has all my Vidyat stuff arranged together Another one has all of my Spiro stuff arranged Like my guide and my copies of the game and stuff And then the other shelf has all of my PS1 games So maybe I could just lug this entire cupboard downstairs in the flames. So I've gone from cheating from taking the suitcase to actually taking the entire mini wardrobe.

That's what I'm going to do. Okay. Fuck you. You can't stop me. Wow. Well, in which case, I'm just going to put out the fire. What do you think of that? Yeah, all right.

Fine. I'm going to not start the fire in the first place. Easy. There's Mikey with his plastic spoon. All his other belongings are gone. It's special. No how. It's just on the street

With this plastic spoon Oh, I've got the happy memories at least This is this will get me through these hard times Living somewhere warm And having belongings My question is If you can afford a plastic spoon How come you can't afford a house?

Precisely Precisely. It really doesn't make any sense to me Yeah I completely agree Ridiculous Do you have a non-cheity answer Ben Is there only one thing

That you think you would save? See, it's a challenge Because My flat is so filled with stuff, just things, belongings, possessions that picking any one of them would be a bit of a challenge, I think, especially because so much of it is video game memorabilia or collectibles or old Game Boy things that do have monetary value, but they're insured, so I'll just let those burn

I suppose I mean if I really think very hard about it I suppose there is I have like a little chest that's filled with two peas and one peas and the two peas and one peas

obviously aren't valuable and I happily pour those out but it's it's this beautifully engraved chest I'm trying to find the right words to describe it my grandparents used to live in Hong Kong

and they lived there for about 10 years or they're about and they brought that back with them and I always eyed it up with great admiration whenever I saw it at their house and my grandma eventually gave it to me and that is the chest

but it does just keep pennies in it currently but I suppose if there was something that had if there was something that had any sort of sentimental value to me at all in this flat that I would save it would probably be that so I'd just pour out the two peas and run off with that little box that sounds nice

I think as you're running out of the house with your little box could you take your Danny DeVito cut out and put him by the window this was the place your ups and frames got a lovely sad frame going on there yeah I want Danny to stare out at the car park

where everyone else has gathered and I want him to know that he was left behind and I also want to encourage the fire department to go to my flat first because they think that there's someone in there oh my God Danny DeVito is Danny DeVito

is in that burning flat we've got to get him out pressure we can't lose him and then you know most of my stuff might survive who knows i don't even thought of that kind of like things that have been given to me like i've got stuff that my grandparents gave me gave me as well which you know there's no even though it is all insured on contents cover it's not about that is it it's not there's no financial replacement for if someone bought you a very similar chest it doesn't be the same doesn't matter It's like that wooden duck I got you from a service station, you know.

You'd be lost without that, wouldn't you? I would. It's on the fireplace. Inconsolable. Wow, see, look, you're just one day, you're going to just kick it in, aren't you? Well, fortunately, the fireplace is not connected, so it's an ornamental fireplace. But I was about to say, actually, just before you said, Wooden Duck, my grandparents, my grandma used to have, It's like the least kind of monetary valuable thing.

But just this little carved, like whittled Canada goose. It's like you could hold it in your hand. It's really small. And that sits on the mantelpiece. And when I was a kid, I used to see this on her shelf, you know, when I was like five or six. I used to just really like this goose that she had. And eventually she gave it to me.

And it's things like that that, you know, you could buy me all the wooden geese in the world or indeed wooden ducks if you're Ben Potter. And it's not about the fact that it's, I don't care what animal it is or what it looks like. It's that, you know, I remember like baking biscuits in her kitchen

and like looking at the goose and being like, oh, yeah, I like that goose. It's cool. Oh, I like my pinkies. Still a plastic spoon, Mikey. Sorry? Still the plastic spoon. Yeah, I like my spoon.

So I'm going to stick with it. I think I've made the right choice here. It's a good spoon. That's good, man. It sounds like a good spoon. If I put literally any photo of the plastic spoon on the LinkedIn, would you be upset because it's not your plastic spoon? No, I'm happy to share.

I want other people to enjoy the plastic spoon, but I am the rightful owner and proprietor of said spoon. I want people to know that. Fair enough, man. It's like an NFT. Cross me, right? Yeah. Do not copy of taste.

Spoon. No, not Tupperware. Tableware. Tableware. Yeah. Very good. Mikey, have you got a thing? I do.

I do. Would you boys like to hear about furies for a short while? Oh, I don't know. Sorry, fairies or furries? Furries. Oh, we're going back to furies, are we? Of course. When do we recently go to furries? Hold on. Not recently. This is Bristol days. Well, we're long overdue. So all hail the return of the furies. And in particular, a convention that took place in 2015 that ended in total disaster.

Oh, no. Oh, dear. Oh, it's a fun one. So, in September 2015, a group of fairies came together with a brilliant idea. Rain Furist. That's like Forest and Furist. You get it? Yep, right.

Yeah, got you. Yep. Yep. A convention for and by furries. This is the story of how that dream burned to the ground before their very eyes. Ferry conventions have a storied history. They started way back in the 1980s, which was surprised to me. It was like they've been going on a long time.

my thought was a relatively recent phenomenon. No, people have been doing it for a long time. And these conventions have been going strong ever since in countries all over the world, hosted by many different companies. Mostly, they go off without a hitch, but that wasn't the case for this convention. Rain First is essentially the reverse of DashCon.

And DashCon, for those of you who don't remember, was an event in 2014 for different members of Tumblr to come together in unity. It's particularly noteworthy for having a ball pit. as one of its main attractions, if you remember those memes. There's like a tweet that went out like, oh, good news, everybody, everyone gets an extra hour in the ball pit. And that was the big selling point when people got there.

And of course, someone peed in it at some point. Of course. That's a hint of how things are going to be going at this convention. Where Dashcon was a disaster caused by its organizers, Rainforest was a disaster caused by its attendees. Things start unraveling with a member of the event staff making a purpose. public announcement during the opening of the event. And they stated, I'm absolutely sure there is no truth to the rumor that Rainforest is under an evil curse. And the convention on that note

got underway. It feels like a really weird thing to make a point of. Maybe they knew what was coming. It all started off innocently enough with the talent contest and the festivities got underway. All well and good. But as the night went on, some attendees started getting absolutely absolutely trashed and I'm talking like Jesus Christ, do these people ever drank before what is going on kind of levels of trashed and these hours of partying unleashed a series of fortunate

events that would continue to unravel through the night. A series of unfortunate events or fortunate events. Unfortunate. Nothing about this is fortunate. Wow, how fortunate. And a few hours later the destruction had officially begun. It started

with somebody deliberately loosening the bolt on one of the hotel toilets so that when the next person flushed, the water would flood from the toilet and everywhere into the bathroom. Just a senseless act of vandalism and almost immediately the bathroom was put out of service. Emergency plumbers were called in

but the damage was already done and the water had in fact leaked through the floor to where the hotel was storing all of its servers. so lovely poopy water all over their internet services, which is nice. Meanwhile, staff and security were threatening to throw out some of the guests. They had disabled their fire alarm in the hotel room so that they could hotbox their room. That's a stinky room I can imagine. And down at the hot tub, a place usually for relaxing.

Someone, another act of just weird, there's a theme here, of just wade what the hell are you doing, vandalism. But someone decided to take all of the towels that were lying around the place. pool, just lob them into the pool, allowing them to get all soggy and float around. And someone even had the bright idea of to bundle up towels and jam them into the spa, into the motor for the jacuzzi, causing it to just completely block and causing thousands of dollars in damage. That's sake. Silly, silly miscreants.

And it keeps going. They stepped it up a notch from Dashcon, from doing a number one in the ball pit to going number two in the swimming pool. Just spectacular, really. Round of applause. On the official Rainforest Twitter account, they announced that, quote, due to vandalism,

the hot tub is closed for the rest of the con. Sorry for the inconvenience, no mention of the brown logs that were invading. And now back to the bathroom, there were rumors floating around on Twitter that someone had drilled a glory hole into one of the bathroom stalls. Sadly, that wasn't actually confirmed, but I could definitely see it happening.

So I'm going to go with truth on that one. But what was confirmed was a haul of over 2,000 nitrous oxide canisters, commonly, well, not commonly, but known as hippie crack. It's what you inhale. It makes you go all light and fuzzy. And apparently these guys just absolutely love the stuff. And it was like the canisters were just left everywhere in the hotel, in rooms, hallways, just everywhere.

And it didn't look great. And the drug problem developed. First, a couple of people overindulged on mushrooms proceed to have a bad trip and were escorted off the premises into an ambulance. People continue to drink too much and emergency assistance had to be requested for several attendees to be taking care of. And while these people were having the time of their lives in the back of ambulances, just at the other end of the car park, two people were arrested for drug dealing and drug possession. So it's like everywhere you look, something's going on.

But while all this was going on, there was actually a convention going on around all the rabid partying. If you went into the main hall, you could be treated to such sites as grown men roaming around wearing nothing but diapers, which is nice. It's a fun fact that I learned. This act of wearing diapers has a name. It's called crinkling after the noise that makes when they walk around. Yeah, that's not good at all. That shook me to my core a little bit. And yes, of course, some of those diapers were indeed full.

It does make you feel a bit better about yourself, though, doesn't it? Yeah, this is, I mean, this is a bucket list to take off if I've ever seen one. It's a bit of an ego boost hearing about what these guys are up to. I don't know why I expected, like, why was that a surprise to me that some of the diapers were full? Like, I just thought, okay, they wear them. That alone is, I mean, you know. Cosmetic diapers. I wouldn't normally yuck anyone's young, but that's kind of, I mean, you know, that's pretty.

All respect to fairies. The majority are lovely people, but here's a highlight of the worst. But yeah, I assumed it was maybe more of a cosmetic kind of, you know, an outfit effectively. It's a costume. But no, functional. When you go as far as to put them on, you may as well make use of them. Why not? Why not?

Especially when the toilet is out of order. Yeah, maybe that's it. They just bought them in as a means of going bathroom when they needed to. Later on, some attendees just started throwing food and used diapers. pus around freely in the gardens and stairways of the hotel. And yeah, you can imagine the kind of war scene that the hotel looked like at this point. In the complete other end of the spectrum, there was a complaint made which rainforest staff addressed during another public announcement in which they kindly asked hotel guests to use their hands for the elevator buttons rather

than their feet. Oh, God. That's weird. I guess if you've got a state, no, that doesn't even make sense in like animal character. He's got, you've got arms. Anyway, in the end, after this tally, this absolutely disgraceful tally of events, the future was over for the con. The Hilton submitted a letter listing all of the reasons Rainforest would not be allowed at their venue from now on. The hotel damage was more than all other cons combined for that year. So that's quite a good, quite a good hit they had there. So like one, a couple of days over overshadowed the entirety of the rest of the year. But it wasn't just the damages.

was insured and had over $150,000 in the bank to pay it all. So theoretically, like, it would have been a massive loss, but at least they could be safe from legal repercussions. But in the end, apparently the Hilton Hotel just literally said, no, don't contact us anymore. We don't want your money. Just go. We don't want to deal with you anymore.

We'll fix this. Just never contact us again. And as you can expect, hotel chains talk. And quickly, hotels all across the country remain aware of just what had unfolded at Rain first and were prompted to ban them from ever hosting a convention ever again. And while there was plans for a rainforest 2016, they just literally couldn't find anywhere that would house them. And so since then, it's been totally cancelled, never to be seen again. Wow. I'm going to Google this

and see if, I mean, I don't know if I want to see whether there are any photos, but, uh, oh, yeah, there were plenty. I mean, of course there are because. Oh, share some of the best in, in our chat. If you want to hear a bit about, uh, positive. furry culture, go listen to one of our previous episodes where we delve into it a little bit with the assistance of a member of our community. Oh, there's a guy in a napi. That's the one I just found. Oh, no. Sorry, I should say yes, I've got, do what makes you happy. This is just more pointing a light at just the scumbags who really ruin shit. Yeah, don't, um, don't, you know, just, yeah, as you say, do what makes you happy, but don't, don't do it to an extent that it

impedes others. Yeah, exactly. Like, if you want to, like, crinkle in the comfort of your own home, if you want to use your crinkly, go for it. Yeah. But just maybe not in a hotel, you know,

and maybe not in a swimming pool. Yeah, maybe not. Just an idea. Does he have ankle restraints on that boy? Oh, he does, doesn't he? Yeah. He's got one of the dog masks on as well. Now, we were advised in our previous fairy conversation

that it is not all sexual. No, no. But it sure does seem like a lot of the stuff coming out of this convention was pretty sexual. It's just a very loud, well, we're led to believe it's the minority, certainly a loud section of the community, whether they're the minority or not. There's a lot of... I apologize and advanced to furries out there. Kinky stuff going on at this particular convention based on the photos that I'm looking at. That's definitely a handpick selection.

I'm sure there's plenty of smiling children pausing with... Oh, they're kind of being children. at this, right? Oh, God, I didn't actually... Surely not. Oh, it looks like it, actually. Oh, no. I found an image here that says this was taken at rainforest, but I don't know if it was.

It's very easy for someone to just post this picture on the internet and say, oh, that was taken at the fairy convention, but maybe it was. It is outside. So who's to say? It's just someone hugging a mascot. A small human, may I add. Not just any human. It continues to fascinate me, this

community. yeah it's got to have so many questions like while researching this I found another furry group that call themselves the burned furs and they were like they were there to counter

I'm reading from a Wikipedia now they were there to counter public acts of perversion within the furry fandom and apparently they got like quite violent and like really oppressive like became like this weird fascist police force within the furies to Keep everything pure.

So I might have to read into them properly one day and see if that's worth delving into. The only way to stop a bad furry with a nappy is a good furry with a nappy, right? A good furry with some pull-up pants. Yes. Sort of like a can-do or something. Oh, that'd be brilliant. Yeah. They want to do a poo at all.

That's for sure. You want to do a poo wherever. They don't care. And that's that's for, that's for, that's for, that's for, I hope you enjoy. Thank you, Michael. Thanks for that, Mikey. You're very welcome. Let's go to another question this time from Dr. Otto Cano at Otto Cano underscore art on Twitter.

If each of you were to release a poddyat's perfume slash after shave, what sense would you choose? Oh. 4 a.m. Cabab Shop. Okay. Oh, 4 a.m. specifically. The chill grill, perhaps. Oh, chill grill at 4 a.m. God, yeah.

That's a smell to be whole. It's not a nice one, but it's interesting. You know, people smell that and, like, they can't help but lock onto you in a room like, ah, this man, this man's got a storied past of disappointing cheesy chips and grime on the floor. I love him. I would maybe choose just to sort of post some tap scent. So it smells of those like squishy stress things that have that weird artificial smell mixed with maybe like fruit loops. Hot and spicy Cheetos.

Burger pillow for good measure. The burger pillow. Which didn't smell at all. You know, the plasticy smell of bubble wrap. Everything. Just everything we've ever received. Sickly smell sweet of sweets and milk a lot to galore. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, no, that's a good one. And sort of the kind of cigarette smoke we would sometimes smell when people had sent things they'd bought at carboot sales and charity shops. from, they've been sitting in Smokers' houses for a long time. The yellow PlayStation 2 labels, they were the best. Yeah, run the full spectrum of smells. Oh, beautiful.

Ah, man, I'm trying to think. I'm trying to think of one. You've hit the nail on the head there. Perhaps the Asda cake. Oh, yeah. A birthday cake smell, that very basic vanilla Victoria sponge with that icing on it. With a hint of shame from the ladies

you had to ask about printing the cable. Yeah, just a small hint of shame. I wouldn't mind that, actually. Like, old school cake smell in a candle. That'd be pretty good. Yeah. It'd be all right. Trying to think if our room had a smell.

I don't know that it did. Probably only after we'd been filming in it for a while. Yeah, maybe. Maybe. It smelled of paint for a few weeks. It did? It did. new yellow smell.

A Pottiet specific smell, though. What would that be? Podiat specific, not just, not Vidiot. Not Vidiots in general, but a Pottiet's perfume slash aftershave. That is a tricky one. Yeah, I'm trying to think. A slightly metallic smelling one in memory of Kevin. Oh, Kevin. RIP.

Yeah. Been a while since we've mentioned him. Sorry, Kev. In my notes for the podcast, it still says mention Kevin, just to remind me at the beginning of each episode. Got to talk about Kevin. He still lives on the arts. He does.

Yeah. He does. Oh man. Come on. There's got to be something super obvious, right? That we're missing. Maybe one that smells of what the Psycho Seagull left on Dave Benson and Phillips car. Oh, God.

Just. Yeah, that sounds great. Yeah. Sprade that all over me. Mm-hmm. Sounds lovely. We've got meat face. Maybe cooked meat face.

I was thinking, yeah. Order Feldhue's meat factory. Yeah. meat facery yeah that's it order meat facery Jesus Christ odor rainforest

no oh no absolutely not no well it's been about three and a half minutes and no one said garlic and chips

so I just want to applaud us for that oh well done because I was waiting I was timing it I was waiting for someone to say it and nobody did so

we're really recovering hey look at us go well done there we are there's our perfume coming soon. Smells of literally everything that we've ever received in post some tat. Can we just call it? I can fucking smell it.

I can fucking smell it. No, that would be the tagline on the advert. Yeah. Poddy it's after shave. You can fucking smell it? Go and ask. Go and ask. Go and ask your local beautician. Oh, God. Okay. It's time for my thing.

Excellent. And it is time to talk about the man who sold the Eiffel Tower twice. Oh my god Sold Okay This is a brilliant write-up From Smithsonianmagg.com

By Jeff Meish Cut some things out For the sake of brevity But I recommend you go read it Here we are, you ready to learn about this man Yes please Count Victor Lustig 46 years old at the time of his incarceration

Was America's most dangerous con man In a lengthy criminal career His sleight of hand tricks and get-rich-quick schemes had rocked jazz era America and the rest of the world. Finally, in 1935, Lustig was captured after masterminding a counterfeit banknote operation so vast that it threatened to shake confidence in the American economy, in the American economy.

It might sound like an evil name. Count what, von Lustig? Count Victor Lustig. Lustig, but I believe Lustig, it means funny. Let me translate it into English. Okay. How funny. I think.

Well, we'll find out how funny he is. A judge in New York sentenced him to 20 years on Alcatraz. Lustig was unlike any other inmate to arrive on the rock. He dressed like a matinee idol, possessed a hypnotic charm, spoke five languages fluently, and evaded the law like a figure from fiction. One secret service agent wrote that Lustig was, as elusive as a puff, I think he means linear, of cigarette smoke and as charming as a young girl's dream.

Oh, wow. While the New York Times editorialized, he was not the hand-kissing type of bogus count, too keen for that. Instead of theatrical, he was always the reserved, dignified noble man. The fake title was just the tip of Lustig's deceptions. He used 47 aliases and carried dozens of fake passports. He created a web of lies so thick that even today his true identity remains shrouded in mystery. On his Alcatraz paperwork, prison officials called him Robert V. Miller, which was just another of his pseudonyms. The conman had always claimed to hail from a long line of aristocrats, who owned

European castles, yet newly discovered documents reveal more humble beginnings. In prison interviews, he told investigators that he was born in the Austria-Hungarian town of Hostinay on January 4, 1890. Lustig claimed he stole to survive, but only from the greedy and dishonest. In the early 1900s as a teenager, Lusig scampered up the criminal ladder, progressing from panhandler to pickpocket to burglar, to street hustler. According to True Detective Mysteries magazine, he perfected every card trick known, palming, slipping cards from the deck, dealing from the bottom. And by the time he reached adulthood, Lustig could make a deck of cards do everything but talk. First-class passengers aboard transatlantic ships became his first victims. The newly rich

were easy pickings. When Lustig arrived in the United States at the end of World War I, the roaring 20s were in full swing and money was changing hands at a fevered pace. Lustig quickly became known to detectives in 40 American cities as The Scarred, thanks to a livid two and a half inch gash along his left cheekbone, a souvenir from a love rival in Paris. Yet Lustig was considered a smoothie, apparently, who had never held a gun and enjoyed mounting butterflies. What a smoothie? That's a turn of phrase I'd never heard before.

It's new to me as well. It must be time, must be period. Appropriate. Yeah, smoothie, Jenkins. You're a smoothie. He enjoyed mounting butterflies. You can get to jail for that. Yeah, I think he can, yeah. Records show that he was just five foot, seven inches tall and weighed 140 pounds.

His most successful scam was the Romanian money box. It was a small box fashioned from cedar wood with complicated rollers and brass styles. Lustig claimed the contraption could copy banknotes using radium. Lustig's repertoire also included fake horse race schemes, feigned seizure. during business meetings and bogus real estate investments. These capers made him a public enemy and a millionaire. According to the crime magazine True Detective, Lustig was a man who society took by one hand,

the underworld by the other, a flesh and blood jackal hide. On November 3rd, 1919, he married a pretty Kansan named Roberta Noray, a memoir by Lustig's late daughter, recalls how Lustig raised a secret family on whom he lavaged his ill-gotten gains. gains. The rest he spent on gambling and on his lover, Billy May Shibble, the buxom owner of a million-dollar prostitution racket. The life this man has led is crazy. Then, in 1925, he embarked

upon what swindling experts call the big store. Lustig arrived in Paris in May of that year, according to the memoir of US Secret Service agent James Johnson. There, Lustig commissioned stationery carrying the official French government seal. Next, he presented. presented himself at the front desk of the Hotel de Creon, a stone palace on the Place de la Concorde. From there, pretending to be a French government official, Lestig wrote to the top people in the French scrap metal industry, inviting them to the hotel for a meeting. Because of engineering faults, costly repairs, and political problems I cannot discuss, the tearing down of the Eiffel Tower has become mandatory, he reportedly told them in a quiet

hotel room, the tower would be sold to the highest bidder, he announced. His audience was captivated and their bids flowed in. It was a scam Lustig pulled off more than once, sources said. Amazingly, the con man liked to boast about his criminal achievements and even penned a list of rules for would-be swindlers. They're still circulated today. Would you like to hear his Lustig's Ten Commandments of the con? Oh, I'd love to. Yes, please. Number one, be a patient listener, it is this not fast talking that gets a con man his coos. Number two, never look bored. Number three, wait for the other person to reveal any political opinions, then agree with them.

Number four, let the other person reveal religious views, then have the same ones. Number five, hint at sex talk, but don't follow it up unless the other fellow shows a strong interest. Oh, that's a weird one. Number six, never discuss illness unless some specials. concern is shown. Number seven, never prying to a person's personal circumstances. They'll tell you all eventually. Number eight, never boast. Just let your importance be quietly obvious. I love that, I don't really know what it means, but it's great. Number nine, never be untidy, and number ten, never get drunk. Like many career criminals, it was a greed, sorry, that led

to Lustig's demise. Lustig had the audacity to trick a Texas sheriff with his money box and later gave him counterfeit cash, which attracted the attention of the Secret Service. Victor Lustig was a top man in the modern world of crime, wrote another agent called Frank Seckler. He was the only one I ever heard of who swindled the law. Teeming up with Gangland Forger William Watts, Lustig created banknotes so flawless they fooled even bank tellers. Lustig Watts notes were the super notes of the era, says Joseph Bowling, Chief Judge of the American Numismatic Association, a specialist in authentic notes,

Lustick daringly chose to copy $100 bills, those scrutinized most by bank tellers, and became, like some other government, issuing money in rivalry with the United States Treasury, a judge later commented. It was feared that a run of fake bills this large could wobble international confidence in the dollar. Catching the count became a cat and mouse game for the Secret Service. Lusig travelled with a trunk of disguises and could transform easily into a rabbi, a priest, a bellhop or a porter. dressed like a baggage man he could escape any hotel in a pinch and even take his luggage with him but the net was closing in

it feels like this guy is the basis for almost every conman in every movie yeah this is very catch me if you can isn't it it is there must be a movie about this guy if there isn't people are really missing out on they are an easy story it's the first I've heard of him honestly

yeah me too Lustig finally fell to tug on the velvet collar of his Chesterfield coat on a New York Street corner on May the 10th, 1935. A voice ordered, hands in the air. It was a victory for the Secret Service, but not for long. On the Sunday before Labor Day, September the 1st, 1935, Lustig escaped from the in inescapable Federal Detention Centre in Manhattan. He fashioned a rope from bed sheets, cut through his bars, and swung from the window like an

urban Tarzan. When a group of onlook has stopped and pointed, the prisoner took a rag from his pocket and pretended to be a window cleaner. Landing on his feet, Lustig gave his audience a polite bow and then sprinted away, and it says in quotes here, like a deer. Lusdig evaded the law. I can picture that, yeah. He was, yeah, he was, he's something else. Lustig evaded the law until the Saturday night of September the 28th, 1935. In Pittsburgh, the dashing crook ducked into a waiting car on the city's north side, watching from a hiding position, federal officers leapt into their cars and gave chase. For nine blocks, their vehicle,

rode neck and neck, engines roaring. When Lustig's driver refused to stop, the agents rammed their cars into his, locking their wheels together. Sparks flew. The cars crashed to a halt. The agents pulled their service weapons and threw open the doors, and according to the Pittsburgh Post Gazette, Lustig told his captors, well boys, here I am. What a boy. Count... Like a deer. Like a deer, yeah. Count Victor Lustig was hauled before the judge in New York in November 1935. Just before sentencing, another judge. journalist overheard a secret service agent telling Lustig, count, you're the smoothest con man that ever lived.

And then they kissed, probably. Mm. Yeah. As soon as he stepped onto Alcatraz Island, prison guard searched Lustig's body for concealed watch springs and razor blades and hosed him down with freezing seawater. They marched him along the main corridor between the cells, known as Broadway, in his birthday suit. There was a chorus of howls, whistles,

and the clanging of metal cups against bars. He is somewhat superficially humiliated. Lustick's prison record said. Whatever his true identity, the cold weather took its toll on prisoner number 300. By December 9, 1946, Lustick had made a staggering 1,192 medical request and filled 507 prescriptions. The prison guards believed he was faking, that his illness was part of an escape plan. He was transferred to a secure medical facility in Springfield, Missouri,

where doctors soon realized he was not faking. There, he died from complications arising from pneumonia. Somehow Lustig's family kept his death a secret for two years until August the 31st, 1949. But Lustig's Houdini-like departure from Earth was not even his greatest deception. In March of 2015, a historian named Thomas Andell from Lustig's hometown of Hostinay began a tireless search for biographical information about the town's most famous citizen. He must have attended school in Hostinay, Andal reasoned in the Hostinay bulletin, yet he is not mentioned in the list of pupils attending the list of pupils attending

the local primary school. After much searching, Undell concluded there is not a scrap of evidence that Lustig was ever born. We may never know the true identity of Count Victor Lustig, but we do know for certain that the world's most flamboyant con man died at

8.30pm on March the 11th, 1947. On his death certificate, a clerk wrote this for his occupation. Apprentice Salesman. Right. And that's it. That works out. That's Victor Luch.

Lustig and the absolutely bonkers con man life that he was able to lead. The kind of stuff that you absolutely would not be able to do today in a million years. And he did it, he did all of it. That could have been 15, 20 different people doing each of those scams. And apparently the good old days of being able to say and do kind of whatever you want with confidence and people just taking your word for it and going along with it. People, you can do that, but now people just Google something on their phones, it's a lot harder to deceive. So rest in peace, this wonderful kind of criminal.

Yeah, I love that, I love all that kind of stuff. Like you say, Ben, you can't really do a lot of this kind of thing now. And obviously, that's a good thing in the sense that people are less likely to get, it used to be the victims of crime, people are less likely to escape from prison. But, you know, there was a kind of golden age of, you know, amazing cons. jail breaks and stuff like the guys who escaped from Alcatraz

that was genius where they like they made a load of fake heads out of Papier-Mashe or something with hair on them and stuff and then placed those on their pillows so that the guards wouldn't realize that they weren't sleeping in their beds

until the morning and you know I think they didn't like form a raft out of like old raincoats that they gathered around from the prison or something like that probably I mean yeah I don't even know, but I think a few people escaped.

Some people were like brought back in and a couple of people never got found. And I think it's assumed that they drowned, but no one knows. But yeah, wow. It is bonkers. Is it, it's Wes Anderson, isn't it, Mikey, who did Isle of Dogs and Grand Budapest Hotel? Oh, yeah, he'd be good. I can, I'm picturing this movie. Yeah, I'm picturing this as a Wes Anderson movie.

Yeah, because it's so far. that it doesn't, it doesn't feel possible. Yeah, you need some kind of comical angle on it, don't you? I looked up the man who sold the Eiffel Tower on IMDB, and there is a film listed in pre-production. The poster is the most MS paint job of the scenes. I'm not very hopeful. It's a dreadful, oversharpened picture of the Eiffel Tower

with just the most MS-paint, dodgy word art. But next to it, it doesn't look very official at all. Yeah, that's a whole. Yeah, that's probably a low-budget production. Someone needs to make this into a proper movie. Go on, damn it. But yeah, go find the article if you want. The man who sold the Eiffel Tower twice.

Smithsonian Mag, very, very good write-up, very comprehensive. A real story. But it was actually from 2016, this article, so it was a while ago. Oh, shit. But, you know, he died a lot longer ago than that. He did. It doesn't really matter. There we are.

That was my thing. Would you guys, like a final question, Yes, please. Let's have it. It's from John Stewart at J. Stewart film on Twitter. So is episode 50 dead or are you'd till doing that live when the panorama ends in three years? For God's sake. Beautiful.

I mean by all counts, yes, that's still happening. Oh, we've got the message in front of us. You have a read that for me, Mikey. So is episode 50 dead or are you'd till? doing that live when the panorama ends in three years. Yeah, that's exactly what it says. That's beautiful. Perfect. Yeah, I mean, by all means,

we're still, we're not just pushing them into the fiery depths of nothingness. They are still planned. Yeah. I don't know if you've been aware the last two years has been quite difficult to... There's been a panorama on panorama, yeah. A really good episode as well.

Yeah, but I think, fingers crossed, I mean, this is just me going off my own head here, but at some point this year, You can very much expect those. I will be, I will be, I'm due a good proper visit up north. So I will be, I will be, we'll put in the damn effort and get it done. Yeah. Yeah.

There are a couple of occasions where we will all be together this year. I mean, not that, like, because at my wedding will be together, although probably not going to have time on the day to do a audience. But, and then, yeah, if you do a visit up here or if we visit down there, you know, now that it's allowed. I'm sure there will be multiple opportunities for us to finally do episode 50. Yeah, we want to do it in person.

That's the plan. And we're closing on episode 100 as well. Yeah. So, yeah, we're probably going to skip over that one too. What episode are we on now? Oh, like 92 or something? Oh, my God. Jesus, well, that close.

Yeah, 94. This is 94. 94. So we are, I mean, they're fortnightly episodes. So we got a few weeks, It's, yeah, certainly we may end up having to record episode 50 and 100 at the same time. That's mad. Yeah, but the short answer is, John, we are till doing that live now that the panorama is hopefully coming to a close.

Yes, well, we'll see. But we'll learn to live with it, at least. We're just rereading John Stewart's tweet at the end. Does he imply that there's still another three years of panorama to come? Well, maybe John does something. you know about the panorama that we don't. John, please hurry things along for us. Go on.

The mission, what's the character in the Matrix? The controller or something? Yeah. He oversees everything. John, come on. Do yous a favour. Come on, John. I don't think I can enter year four of the Peper Army at this point.

You're tired, John. Let us go. Well, there we are. That is your poddiots. Thank you so much for listening, everybody. If you would like to, you could go to some kind of web store is that right michael you are absolutely correct if you go on to your device of choice and whack in store dot yogscast.com and to the address bar you'll be greeted with a

wonderful array of goodies and trinkets most importantly is the lovely vidiots section which is filled to the brim with goodies we've got t-shirts mugs and hoodie for your wearing and using pleasure go check it out there's no discount code still but you know keep an eye

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shout out at the beginning and the end of the show and also join pod squad mickey kick us off once more with the pod squad this week we have the generous plops ahoy the equally generous wordal warrior queen clit of the elf and cunts sorry queen clit of the elven cunts i really wish i didn't try that again didn't hear that again pro trainer the generous gafer moleman jason allenby naked cheguins work event katie kin solo david's dick in son ben saved my drunk uncle waggatha christie big titi jesus 42 Mr. David Dickinson, Donak, 07, and Mr. Blobby becomes a fireman. Thank you all. As well as, arse face, Mr. Black,

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£3 or more to get a shout out at the beginning and the end of the show Nothing's out on videos this week four years ago because we hadn't launched yet But by next episode, we might have. Someone dug up the 501 tweet we were talking about last time.

I should, I should, I'm going to find that and find the date for it. Because we can, that should be earmarked as an important day in Vividient's history. I was going through my work computer when I got in today and just clearing it out of a load of stuff. And in my downloads folder, about two years ago, for some reason, I don't know if I did it by accident. I downloaded the teaser we put out where it was just a yellow V and it was like 2001

Space Odyssey music playing at the dawn of man or whatever it's called you know I saw that today actually that's probably about right for this time four years ago still got you want to guess gone Mikey

I was just said do you want to guess when the announcement tweet came out um gent hmm January the, it wasn't January the 5th, was it, like early? I didn't expect it. No, no, a bit later than that.

Late Jan, like the, I don't know, today? You're both completely off. It's the 12th of January. Sadly, we've missed it. So I'll have to celebrate that anniversary next year. The justice it deserves. This time next year, we'll just have to do it then. Oh, yeah.

I was going to say, I've still got all of the very early, um, vidiates assets that Mikey mocked up, different logos and color schemes and stuff. Oh, yeah. Stuff involving VHS tapes that I thought looked really cool. Yeah. Got it somewhere.

We should do it. We should post those at some point. On my computer at work, I've still got every raw recording from every video. Wow. Yeah. You're still not the same PC, won't you? Yeah, yeah. I'm still using the same PC.

I need to move them off at some point. Maybe if I like a dig around and see if there's any weird goodies hidden in there. Yeah, I've got all the raw footage for pretty much everything we did in that time. Wow. That's amazing. It's crazy. a bound to. That's what he'd say

from the burning building. Yes. Mikey's PC tower. Speaking of Mikey's PC tower, Mikey, where can people find you on the internet? Something about that PC tower. You can come to my Twitter tower

at Paraboy where I post occasionally not too much to be honest but hey, you got a nice picture of Karen looking grumpy and triangular today so it's worth sticking around for that. And I stream on occasion

on Twitch Paraboy again I play lots of weird fun games I stream on occasion so it's worth it's worth keeping an eye out because I don't tend to have

much planning or anything involved you just get slapped with a stream so get ready excellent and Peter where can people find us I'm sure they all know by now that we are team triple jump

as a pair plus one who is not a Mikey replacement and never could be everyone is on their own merits but it heads a team triple jump on YouTube, Twitch, Twitter, Facebook to see what we're doing. We're doing live streams, videos, lists, worst games ever, cooking, rules boss, prove it. I mean, some of those things haven't happened for a long time, but they're not dead.

They're just somewhere better than memory cards in that they have not been completely axed. They're not dead, they're just changing. They are just changing. They're just changing. And you can also catch Ben and I on our individual Twitter. profiles as well. That's at that Peter Austin and at Confused underscore dude.

Yes. Yes indeed. Why not leave us an iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice five stars please, five stars please. Thank you. It really helps something to do with Al Gore's rhythms. We love it. Thank you. Do we have a final question for people at home to answer? What would they say from their burning houses?

Yeah. Yeah, tell us. Fantastic. Well, you will look after yourself. We'll see you in a couple of weeks. We love you very much. Goodbye everybody. Bye-bye. Bye-bye.