Podiots - Podiots: Episode 96 - The Food Episode

Episode Date: March 8, 2022

Peter's got some food to polish off, Mikey has a lunchtime fight, and Ben tucks into some onions. Donate £3 or more to get a shout out and join the Pod Squad! - https://streamlabs.com/podiotsdonations/ New merch: http://smarturl.it/Podiots Twitch: Twitch.tv/vidiotsofficial YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/vidiotsofficial Twitter: https://twitter.com/VidiotsOfficial Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/vidiotsofficial Discord:  http://bit.ly/vidiotsofficialdiscord Ben and Peter's channel 'TripleJump': https://www.youtube.com/teamtriplejump Mikey's Twitch: https://www.twitch.tv/parrotboy Follow the gang on Twitter: Ben: @Confused_Dude Peter: @ThatPeterAustin Michael: @ParrotBoy Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Pickax Wow, what a, what a charity stream that was, right? Blime. Wasn't it great? We raised a million pounds. Mikey shaved his whole head off. I even went the extra of eyebrows and all. It's horrifying to look at.

We sold that toilet seat for a billion. A billion pounds. Yeah, it was fantastic. Every penny. At time of recording We have not done our live stream It's coming up tomorrow Time of recording

Very exciting But by the time this goes out That will have been old news It happened days ago Don't care anymore But thank you in advance From our point of view For every

All your generosity I'm sure There was lots of it Yes There was a wonderful bunch Yeah Thank you everyone for joining us I really want to know how much the toilet seat is going to go for.

I hope there's like in the last hour an intense bidding war happens because I feel like anyone who's committed to it will be feverishly defending that thing or maybe they'll think, no, what am I doing? That's a toilet seat. Yeah. It might not go. It might not be the exciting spectator sport we want it to be if like one person today or tomorrow does like a really high bid and then no one else is willing to compete with them and

I know, just sit on that amount and we'll just watch the countdown and no one will bid any further. But time will tell. It's a hell of a package. I think it's worth, it's, it's invaluable. It is. Yeah. It's a lot of famous bombs on it. Signed photo.

Visible stains. What's not to love? Yeah. Yeah. Shall we ruling? Talking of toilet. Should we do the podcast? Sounds good.

Let's do it. Hello everybody and welcome to poddietz, the official Vidyats, podcast, it's a conversational podcast where we take some questions from you at home and obey the law of the three us, where everybody brings a thing along to talk about. I'm Ben, I'm Peter, and I'm Michael. Hey, guys. Hey, how you, how you doing? Good, doing good, thanks.

Yeah, yeah, good, good, good. How are you? Yeah, fine. Good, good, good, good, it's good, good, it's all good. Yeah, it's good. Yeah, it's good. Yeah, I wonder, I'm, I'm, and I still can't stop thinking about my potential bald head that my future's laden with. Does that open me up to, like, any immediate cosplaying? Like, Matt Lucas, Vin Diesel. Vin Diesel.

Wow, that's two ends of the bald spectrum there. Wallace. Jason Statham. Professor X. Phil Mitchell. Phil Mitchell. Grant Mitchell. All the Mitchells.

Jean-Lou Picard. Execute from Pokemon. Just any egg-themed character. A egg. Chicken eggs. Humpty-dumpty. Sparrow eggs. I could go as an actual Pokemon.

a ball just paint the bottom half for my rare face red ostrich egg Scotch or like attach some some breadcrumbs to me yum yum yeah we could egg you and bread do you sure yeah that'd be lovely actually I'm well up for that we'd have to do it with V I'm now right so my mind immediately thought could we make a video where we

make Michael into a Scotchette Ed and bread Michael's head not cook it, but just do that. And then I realised you're vegan and you wouldn't like that. So then I immediately thought, well... Well, yeah, we'll just use corn. Because the problem wasn't that Mikey might have something, some, any kind of objection it was,

well, we can't use real meat. No. But we could use like analogs, like, like... Actually, I can't think it's brown analogs. That's all I'd say. Such as brown. Yeah, brown, just the brown. Very burnt toast.

Different levels of burnt toast for every layer. A base layer of marmite for stickiness And I'm crumpled up toast Would you actually be up for this? I think so, yeah I mean provided I'm still bald Well, maybe I'll have to reshave my head for this But once I've done it once, the foot gates are open, aren't they?

Michael gets hit by a scotch. Yeah, there you go, look out for that. That sounds like it's going to smell great. Yeah, sure it will. You'll be delicious. Yeah, yum, yum. Just let it hang Oh dear

Hey, you enjoying yourselves People at home? Yeah Do you want to pay money for this? To be clear, you don't pay money for this But you pay money in support of this Yeah No one has paid for this

No Legally, hopefully Do you want to pay money to allow this to continue Is really what I'm saying Yeah If you do Go to streamlabs.com Forward slash Poddiet's donations

Donate to fuck Donate three pounds or more To get a shout out at the beginning And the end of the podcast You can do that in sports, us You really appreciate it We do We do

Who's done that this week Fortnite Three weeks We start with Miss Carolyn My Chinko Lovely world's colliding there The very generous

Podiat's NFT And they say NFT's the tip While you work the shaft got him I know I got you because Mikey is chuckling loudly Ben is laughing while trying to hide

the shame of finding that funny and Peter is barely is a barely relevant and Peter is Peter is telling a barely relevant anecdote And Peter is a barely relevant anecdote Oh that's actually the saddest

Yeah that's actually quite a sad summary of a person They were a barely relevant anecdote Yeah At least they were an anecdote. Much love. Dave, quote-unquote, non-fungible, Tolkien Phillips. Thank you very much. Licking Moon Fuck Rocks.

The generous Ben's big blue balls. Hey guys, had a rough time lately, but your podcast has really helped and made me laugh. Please get Ashton on as a special guest for an episode. Keep up the good work. Thank you, Ben's. B, B, B, B. Quadruple B's Spotted Richard

Caroline Eat Peter's wedding Caroline at Peter's wedding Oh Jesus Christ That camel case Caroline at Peter's wedding There we go, thank you

I genuinely read that and thought Yeah that's right It's fine, let's move on The Generous I just moved They say I just moved during a scary time I'm sore

All my shit is hidden in a lost crate, brackets I packed. No. A lot crate. All my shit is hidden in a lot crate. I also corrected that, but let's keep true to the original, I guess. I can't find my lot crate. I love buying those, the monthly lot crates.

The world feels scary, so my only solace is to watch memory cards. By guess hearing, my name will work. Rest and peace, memory cards. Thank you very much. Right memory cards, thank you. Me bananas are gone missing. Crencles McThunder Snorch My brother wrote a shit book

Finn Tristam Donak 07 Fred W wants to like Peter Yum 420 wants to lick Peter Sorry wants to lick Peter Yum 420

That's much better That's better And Stephen Skodez Thank you Also Vidiots is not a cult Peace Who was very generous

and has put Russian warship Go fuck yourself Nice Fair enough So that's a generous donation for peace there I'm behind that

Dick David Dick Davidsson My Wide U Reith Rastings You're not going to get me on that Hawkman 105 Lord Brotovich

Specky Becky Bonbon bon son Stephen Skodes bowl cut Don't forget Episode 69 dudes Alth Ramsey's porn dungeon

David Dick In Minge And Mr. Blobby becomes a sous chef We've also got Will You Pooh Juan me Muck Johnson with 50p

of garlic L.A. Night Yeah! Mr. Macker Many Cox ass to mouth Joris Bon Bonbonson You know it's all about The Coom

Laurie Wales Ye Bob Guy Incognito It's Tiny Peeps Veronica Green I think Boba Fetish And then they weren't satisfied with that

So they did it again Boba Fetish Cheggers in Paris Big Bubba Buddha And Dom's Dick in Da Bunga Hole What a vulgar selection, geez. I know, some real grim stuff in there.

Thank you. Pod Squaders. We appreciate all of you. Once again, go to streamlaves.com forward slash potty atst donations. Three pounds or more. To get a shout at the beginning and the end of the show.

Thank you so much. Absolutely. I've got some questions for this week's episode. Would you like to hear question one? I'd love nothing more. This is from X Pink Glasses on Twitter, who says, joked about Mikey becoming Prime Minister

on his last stream. So I ask you boys, what would be your campaign slogan and what would your party strive for? Would you have a campaign song? Can be answered individually or as the Vidyets Collective. And underneath there is a gif of Theresa May dancing. Oh, cute.

The good old days of politics. Yeah. Do you want to do individual campaigns or band together for a coalition of chaos? I quite like a Vidiates party. three of us are kind of running as joint party leaders. Every time we make a speech, we're all holding hands together at the podium.

Yeah, just speaking in unison, who's memorized it. Hello and welcome. Oh, that's perfect, yeah. We're off to a strong start. We don't even have a campaign yet, but we've got our presentation style nailed. It's a strong presence, I think, with a really triple-wifference. podium with three lights on it. Could we change it up once every other

sort of rally and have it so only one of us speaks but the other two hold hands on either side and they just lip sync? Yeah, just mouth the words with one person who say. That sounds good. Yeah, yeah. Like children of the corn kind of creepy dogs. So what would be our campaign slogan?

Tell your friends Poll, yeah, poll your vote with your friend, I don't know Poll your friends Paul your friends Paul your friends What would our party strive for CBBC Bring back memory cards

Yeah, of course Yeah Pro BBC On a memory card platform Um Oh Three snowy joys for all perhaps

Oh no No absolutely not Everyone would probably be happy with that Until they actually tried One went Oh this just

It's a sordust Replace 24-hour news chat Actually no Let's replace Just GB News With a 24-hour Broadcast

of Dave Benson Philips Back catalogue Yeah I'm going to say Backside DB News His famous bum

Toilet Cam We go straight to toilet seat cam. Oh, lovely. We have like KVC style adverts with Dave's toilet seat on there as well. Yeah, we could have a TV channel that's constantly just doing reruns of Dave

just episodes of get your own back and fund song factory. Can we buy the rights to Dave from Dave? Just a channel called Dave, but it's just Dave Benson Phillips. Very good, very good. Yeah, I like that. To be clear, I wouldn't like that.

I think it sounds like torture. That's capital punishment. He asked us to leave him out of it, and we're now entertaining the idea of running for Prime Minister and setting up an entire TV channel of him being run over and over again. That is not leaving him out of it.

There's a duality to that, though. That's like nightmare daytime TV material, but very good late night, devil-letters material. It's 4 a.m. You've lost control your life and just sat there. Stupid day. The giant baby being chased by kids

As they throw chips into its mouth Yeah Dave Benson Channel The DBC And there he is All day Fantastic Would we have a campaign song

Was the next question Yeah We know what it is, don't we? Stoke on Trent Of course it's Stoke on Trent We'd also move the capital to Stoke on Trent We would Yeah

Yeah we'll bring industry back to Stalk on Trent Oh, can we also reduce the price of extra garlic down to the price it was in the early 2000s? Yeah. So that it's only 50p. Because at the moment, it must be a quid at this rate. Well, to be fair, we don't know how much he got. He just said that he got an extra 50's worth.

That's true. I agree. We could lower the price so that an extra 50's worth goes further than before. He did say that 150 was the garlic and chips. So we know that a standard portion of garlic and chips is £1.50. There's no way it costs that now. It's at least £2.30. Yeah, God, you can tell that video was recorded than the North.

£1.50 for garlic and chips. That is incredible. I've never any thought about how much sauce this guy was. I know the fact that he was through. The weird thing to me, well, there's all sorts of weird in that video. But one of the weird things is that it's garlic and chips, as though garlic is the main centre. piece of the meal.

And to be clear to anyone who's unfamiliar with the British takeaway scene, that's garlic sauce. It's not just like clothes. It's not some really fancy fries with garlic and stuff. No, he's just manky garlic sauce and shit chips. Yeah, the most anemic looking white liquid drizzled all over his chips. But he calls it garlic and chips. The chips is the garlic.

He really went into the shop hoping for some garlic and thought, oh, you can get chips. with it for a quid better double up on garlic there's too much chips yeah um stoke on Trent then and uh that was it actually the next bit was can be answered individually or as the video it's collective so there we go i think we're going to be um in power by next year i like it what's not to love in that collection of policies yeah oh god that fucking photo is horrible of the chips yeah which one have you posted that? Yeah, I put,

um, it's just, it's, it's described it perfectly. It's anemic looking, isn't it? It's the same color as the fucking box.

It is. Are you sure it's not mayonnaise? No, it's too liquidy for me. It's just white. That's, wow, that's,

that's, I've just looked at the source of that. Um, that is from kebab boys with a Zed and Sheperton, and the caption is garlic sauce for your chips and the little okay finger. Jesus Christ. Imagine using that to advertise your business.

It almost looks like the worst kind of bookache there, really. It does. There's a lot of ache going on. Can we change our party name to the kebab boys? Yeah, with a Z. With two Zs for legal reasons. Yeah, we have to be different. A garlic with a key.

What horrible start. On the subject of food, I have got a thing here that was actually sent in by a Podiat's listener when Ben and I did a tat appeal over on Triple Jump so it's been posted in alongside other stuff Worst Games Ever and so on but there was an envelope enclosed that said this must go to one podiot and one poddyat only so it ended up going with me

this is from Bartek who says Hello boys and the entire walrus clan For me you're a window into life in the United Kingdom Thanks to you, I learned about many UK cultural achievements, TV shows, movies and historical events that are not mentioned in textbooks here in Poland. I didn't know about DBP, bum piss or cheggers before. Thank you.

I know why bum piss isn't there next to Dave Benson, Phyllis. Historic British achievement. Why isn't there any textbooks mentioning bum piss? Yeah, why is that not happening? I always say that the food is the first step to getting to know other people. knowledge grew the most when I was introduced to the recent British food tournament. What the fuck? I thought when the first names were mentioned. What are they talking about? It must be a joke. These dishes can't be called that. Oh, how fucking wrong I was. I checked

Wikipedia and I am delighted. And so he's then looked up all kinds of interesting foods. Stargazy pie. Are you guys familiar with that? Oh, yeah. It's a pie with, like, actual whole fish head sticking out of it, looking up to the sky. Oh, it's... Bedfisher... Bedfordshire Clanger, which is... I'm not even sure exactly what that is. It's like a sausage roll or something. That is horrible.

Bedfisher clanger! But he's listed all kinds of things here. Beef Wellington, spotted dick, eaten mess. Which I suppose all must sound very strange. And he says at the end, And my favourite, Toad in the Hole. It sounds like Roll Dahl and Charles. fucking dickens are trying to invent

a polite curse for an 18th century orphaned diastema hero? What my... Is that... What is that word? Wow, he's used a word from my language that I don't understand.

Anyway, he's come up with a game. Here on nine, Polish specialities with equally stupid names, appearances and ingredients. Based on photos, guess how their names are translated into English. Extra points for guessing what they're made of and an extra point for guessing their popularity 27 points in total um i mean bartek's

really gone to town here with um photos and um popularity ratings and so on that might be overcomplicating it for the purposes of a podcast especially since you know it's a non-visual medium so the people at home won't be able to see but what we'll do is we'll add each photo that i'm going to send Ben and Mikey to the thread on Twitter. And also, I will read out the name of the dish so that you guys can just Google image, search it at home if you're, you know, on the bus or on your computer or whatever. So you should be able to sort of play along. I've tried to be very descriptive as well about what we're witnessing.

Yeah, okay. So the first one here, some of the photos, so this is all printed out, obviously, from Bartech and some of the photos that he is enclosed, I've managed to find the exact ones on the internet but some of them are just similar but in any case here is the first one this is pronounced he's got phonetic pronunciation for me here um kapushniak um it's spelled kap us n ia k so have a look at that looks that looks nice it's it's like a watery broth with potatoes in it a little bit of beef carrots yeah yeah it looks all right i get down with that so um bar has got the English translation of what the food means in a kind of toad in the

whole sort of way and so you have to just guess what it means basically and I guess the closest out of the two of you will get the point let's play it like that okay okay so capushniak what do you think that is potato swamp okay then let's go for ball soup okay I think Mikey's probably closest it translates roughly as drizzle. A nice bowl of drizzle. Number two, this is called Babka Semayachana. I've probably absolutely

butchered that one, but never mind. Here it is, looks quite nice. It looks like a savory cake. It does, isn't it? Yeah, for the people at home, it's a cake-looking item garnished with lettuce and some assorted herb. Cabbage leaf.

Cabbage, I think. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's right. Let's go for Mum's log. Mum's log. Okay. Mikey. Gravel path.

Ben is definitely closest. That is a potato granny. Oh, wow. A potato granny. I should tell you, actually, because Bartak has said what these each are as well. So the Kapushniak, the first one, is sauerkraut soup. It's served warm with boiled potatoes and or bacon. And he's given it a popularity rating of three out of five. Okay. Babka Tiamya chana, potato granny. Pototo casserole with crispy fried veggies or anything you

want. Just like granny, warm, wrinkle and portable. Not to be confused with chocolate grandma, which is different. No, no, definitely not. For some reason, the funniest bit of that is that he put wrinkle instead of wrinkly. Just like Granny, warm, wrinkle and portable. That is a two point, sorry, two out of five popularity. That looks good though. Up next. Flashkey.

I don't know how he's even translated this one because it, as far as I'm concerned, this isn't a real English word, but maybe it is. So here you go, Flashkey. I'm just going to look up the English word. to see if it does mean anything. Oh, no. That's giving me nightmares just looking at it. What's going on in there? I'm not entirely sure what is in there.

I don't even know where to start with describing this one. It's a soupy cut. It's a stew of kinds with an orange liquid. And I can't, it looks like cats' tongues. It's the best way to describe a lot of cats' tongues in there. Yeah, it's kind of spiky. Spikey. Let's go for Eldrich Pudding.

Elkish pudding. That's very good. Mikey. It's served in kind of like a combination ball and mug with two handles. So I'm going to go with Cup Thulu. Cup Thulu. Okay. We might have to vote on who's the closest.

This actually, I looked up what the translation, what the English word means that Bartak has given me. and it's just the name of a dish in the UK or in English. So it's chittalings, all one word. Chittalings, which both in Poland and seemingly in English-speaking languages, is intestine soup. And certainly the Polish version is from Masovia, region of Warsaw. Highly seasoned, spicy, sour, and very oily.

Strange that the USA did not want to introduce democracy into it. popularity four out of five Wow Should we call that a draw then Yeah call that one a draw I know I know Like food differs by Culture

But man intestines That's a lot I mean they're saying that We eat tripe and Well you say we Well I fucking don't Cockneys

Cockneys eat tripe They do So this one I'm about to send you Is the exact picture That Bartek sent me in fact the last one was as well the same one so this is Gao ompki

I think I like the look of that yeah that looks good so what do you think these are so for reference this is an orange soupy base once again but this time there's little parcels of meat filled things

I can tell you actually it's cabbage that is wrapped around those it looks more carbby doesn't it but that is it's also not meat I'll just give you that as well what? Oh my god I've got it completely wrong well then sad ravioli

Mikey Pleasurable pillows Pleasurable pillows Yeah yeah Okay This apparently means Little Pigeons Oh

It's little pigeons Pigeons Porridge Wrapped in boiled cabbage It's served warm with tomato sauce delicious popularity 5 out of 5

Wow That is truly out there That is mad I would say again You probably neither of you Were really closer than the other on that one

So we'll call that one a draw So it's still one a piece Isn't it, I think I'm on one So there are nine of these We're on number five This is Ruanki

Ruanke Oh we should be spelling these out So this is R-U-C-H-A-N-K-I And if you are playing along at home. I'll spell the other two out while Ben and Mikey have a look at that. This is almost a pancake-style dish. Some of them are so long. They're just really long words. No one wants to hear me sit and

spell these out. I think you're just going to have to find the threat. Or use Mikey's audio description. What does a Staffordshire old cake actually look like? Is it different or is it similar? No. No, no, it's no. I think these are Honey Brothers. Honey Brothers. Honey Brothers Powdered rounds Okay I think Ben might be slightly closer

in that he included some kind of relation in there This translates as Fun Under Quilt Cake or just fuck cake Apparently So we have bookcake over here Maybe

Honey Brothers just takes it on that I give you that Yeah that's fair So this is pancakes from hot curdled milk yeast and bread the name comes from the cake that needs to cool down

and thanks to yeast it moves what looks like a married couple playing under the quilt sure serve with sugar powder popularity one out of five they look delicious wow never in a million years

would I've gone that route with the description that is incredible yeah up next copitka that I think is pretty much the same image as what Bartak sent. This is K-O-P-Y-T-K-A

copid-car. This looks a lot more like pillows than the pigeon one. It does a bit, yeah. It looks just like raw dough that's been sliced up. I'll give you a clue. This one is just a noun

in plural form. So it's like just calling it pillows or shoes or whatever. so pick a noun any noun clouds oh wigs let's go wigs I'm going to give that one to Mikey

it's actually hooves these are scoring system so arbitrary it's great I know isn't it it's just like I mean Mikey picked like an object that is related to a living being Whereas Ben picked a weather format, weather system. That's fair. Thick potato and cottage cheese noodles served with various sauces, even sweet.

Popularity five out of five. Fair play. That does sound good. Number seven, these look, I mean, you know, not to yuck anyone's yum, but I don't quite like the look of these. This is Ushkas G. Beamy Ushkazji Beamy or Barme

Wow How do I Describe these about being obscene It looks like little Little white bumholes These do look a bit like ravioli But they are Yeah they're like

They're like ravioli that have been Squashed down And then they have a number of folds in them Yeah They look a bit like oysters Like soft oysters Yeah they do look a bit like oysters like oysters um you can go you can do as many words as you want here it's not necessarily one

word um the english version what do you think weepy eyes okay i think this is another it's another grandma dish um i think this is grandma's sorrow oh these are ears with mushroom oh okay stuffed dumplings uh with mushrooms or meat traditional traditional Christmas dish served with beat, borsht, popularity five out of five. Wow. They sound nice. I like mushroom. I'm kicking myself now because just after I said mine, I was thinking, oh, they look like

goblin ears. It's fine. I missed my chance. What I'll do is, given that your previous point, Mikey, was a bit tenuous. Yeah. And I would say you maybe marginally win this one. We'll put those two together and say, that all made one. point last time.

That's fair. That's fair. So it is all to play for now. It's 4-4, confirmed. You have a definite point for those two. So this is Huda Yeva or Yeva. And this is the same picture that Bartek included. Oh, okay, this is a tricky one.

There are two different translations here. So it opens you. opens you up slightly more, gives you a chance to be somewhat related. Visually, it looks like cream of mushroom soup to me. That's the closest... Yeah, it is a bit. Closest analogue. Yeah, yeah.

Milky Delight. Okay, I'm going to say... Ben. I was going to say creamy muck-muck, but I feel like that's too similar to Milky Delight. Oh. So, how about Sunday surprise? This is Skinny U or Skinny Eve Oh

U as in the tree Y-E-W or Eve as in the name I'm not really sure how they both translate But maybe that's just what the name sort of Means over there or sounds like This is a very fat and caloric soup Made of cheese, buttermilk, cream and flour Served in small portions

Traditionally soup of my region Name probably came from from young yew wood that was used as a bowl, eaten cold in the heat by lumberjacks or miners, along with bread and garlic popularity, one out of five. I wouldn't say either of you were particularly close there, so it all comes down to this last one. And if neither of you says anything closely related to it,

then I guess we're all winners together. This is Hrust, Hrust, the phonetic. is H-R-U-S-T but it's spelt C-H-R-U-S-T crust They look like Doritos with powder on them almost Yeah, they're kind of like

twisted Oh yeah, chur-y They look very tasty, I think They look sweet Yeah Kind of fried Christmas toenails Oh, okay

All I can think is Arrowheads Oh, see, I don't know if either of you get a point there, but it's actually brushwood. Apparently, so here you go, it's also known as Favour Key, small, crispy, deep fried crackers, sweet or with spices, served with sugar, powder, or with cinnamon. Eat on the beginning of carnival, along with patched key on twisty, fartek, fat, fat, third. Thursday. Oh, it's that Thursday last week. Was it? Yeah. Yeah, it's fat Thursdays. I think it's kind of like the last day before Lentz where you sent you just, well, traditionally in Poland, you eat donuts. Oh, I see. Yeah, like Shrove Tuesday. Yeah, yeah. Well, what I'm going to do, given that it's, it was related to a holiday.

I'm going to give the point to Ben there because he said Christmas to no. Congratulations. Well done. Well earned. A well deserved win. Yeah. So there you go. That was, um, thank you Bartek. for sending that game in. That was a lot of fun. We've all learned a bit about Polish cuisine. And as we say, the thread will be available. So there should be some images for you to have a look at. Thank you very much. Both of you, Peter and Bartek, the power company. Thanks. So I've got a question here, and then I should probably add all those pictures bit by bit to the thread. But I'll ask a question first. When do you all go by other names such as Mike or Michael, Pete?

for Peter or Benjamin for Ben. I think it's supposed to say Mike for Michael rather than Mike or Michael. Yeah, yeah. But yeah. When do you go by different names? Personally, the only people who call me Pete are my family, and they all call me Pete. They never call me Peter, really.

Or people who've known me since I was very young. So like friends of the family, but like, you know, the kind of people who you call your auntie, even though they aren't, those kind of people. They all call me Pete. and actually occasionally someone in like chat or on social media or in the comments or something

will just refer to me as Pete or say like thanks Pete or great video Pete and I find it really strange I don't find them strange for saying it but it feels really weird to me that like someone would call me that especially given that no one on camera who I work with ever calls me Pete

really as far as I remember so it always comes across it always always always feels a bit odd when people call me Pete because it's very much quite a, as I say, it's like a familial thing. It's like, you know, only people who are very close to me call me that. So that's always a bit odd. It's like when I'm in trouble, I get called Michael.

It's like, oh, oh, no. Like, if I hear the word Michael, my heart instantly goes, oh, Jesus, what's happening? I don't think anyone calls me, Benjamin. Not even my head. Did you ever get called anything else, Benji or anything at all other than Ben? No.

Always always just been Ben. people might have fun with it every so often but like not there's no one who calls me anything other than Ben that is my name that's all yeah nothing no no nothing exciting no twists on that I think I've I was dubbed Mikey at a very young age like people at school just instantly called me that and then the only like that that was a that was a continuous thing from school to university and the only time it changed was my first job at our culture

when I was dubbed MJ. Yeah, we had no idea very quickly. Peter and I didn't realize that that wasn't a longstanding thing. So we, as soon as we got even the faintest whiff of the fact that maybe you weren't so keen on that, we changed course, but we had no idea.

I did quite enjoy it, but it's one of those things like, you know, new kid in the office, I think you'd be getting off to a weird start. It's like, oh, this is MJ. I'm like, it's Mikey. I don't know. I feel like I just kind of.

kept schum and rode out my new nickname. This is who I was going to become in my adult working life. She kicked off. My name's Mikey. Don't forget it. Yeah. I still like maybe once a year will just accidentally call you MJ. I'll be like, oh yeah, MJ, can you just send me that thing or whatever?

I don't, I'm not, I don't, I don't hate MJ. It's just, it's weird compared to Mikey, you know. I've never called Mike or Mick. Yeah, I think I always say, like, well, maybe when I go bald, I look more of a mic or a mic. Yeah. Mickey is one I get quite regularly. Oh, yeah. That's just a blatant mispronunciation.

Right, okay. It's usually in text format. Like, people who I know in person just refer to me as Mickey. And it's like, damn, he's missed the mark on that one. I'm not a mouse. How dare you. Yeah. Michael news.

I don't think I've got any of the pet names, sadly. I think I'd say it. Oh, well, just me then. It's not Peter outside of, sort of outside of work, really. Oh, wait, no, my dad calls me Sonner. Right, sonner. And I'm just Michael to my mother. Sonner, that's true.

What you've been up to this week, Sonner? We've got like a thousand different names for you, Peter, at work. Peeps, is a personal favourite. Nicknames? T.P. Well, yeah, I've got, yeah, that's true. Peeps. Peeps

Tony Peter Teepers True Teepers Peepers Peepis Teepis sometimes

Yeah we'll try and for the next episode we'll come hot and fresh with some some Ben

and alternatives Oh well I hate all of them just saying Like don't Don't you ever fucking call me that ever again

BP BP and TP Yeah again like you say you know when people might jokingly

call you Benjamin on one occasion or other I've probably called you BP in response to

Tpee like now and now but yeah that's fine hardly ever like once or twice we've well we have called mj midge which i quite like midge is good oh you forgot about that hey midge yeah it was mj and then it was like hey amidge i'll tell us i mean no midmch kind of sounds like i should be a pub landlord if i'm going to have that name and at least in day-to-day discourse it's like all right midge i have a pint a bitter please Who has got a thing?

I'm just posting all the images to the thread, but do go on. I'm going to continue on the food theme. Oh. Oh, it's quite a foody episode. It is. So it's time for another fight. It's been a little while, so I thought it's time to bring it back to life. We've made soup.

The best Polish dish. Now we're experts in it. We can roll into this. So we've had cereal fights, fruit fights, crisps fights, biscuits. I think now it's time we make a bastion of the lunch world finally fight. It's time for the sandwich fight, the tournament of the decade. Okay. I had to check through Mitch had and do this before because it feels like an obvious one, but nope.

So in front of me, I've got 18 sandwiches. And believe me, after about five, it gets quite hard to name them. But I think I've got a good selection that covers all ends of the sandwich spectrum from breakfast to sweet to savory. We've got everything in there. So let's go. We've got our first round. I think this is a clear winner, at least to me. But we have egg and cress and the cheese toasty.

Oh, come on. You sent egg and cress out to die. I figured it wasn't going to win. Let's just put it out of its misery straight away. Yeah, egg and cress, no matter what it was up against, would always lose to me. Egg and cress. Yeah. It's the sandwich you eat when there's no.

None left. Yeah. That's like you force tweeted a, like, oh, what the funeral, awake. Yeah. Oh, what's the afternoon tea? It's like as a finger sandwich I could see it. Yeah. Yeah.

Torrey birthday. Yeah. Yeah, it's not something I ever choose. And as, you know, I quite like egg sandwiches on the whole, at least used to. Whenever I talk about non-vegan food, I assume I mean in the past sense. But yeah, I think cheese toasty is the undoubtable winner there. like the ultimate sandwich pair it with some soup oh you're on to a winner there

next up we have the trusty old tuna sandwich or the chicken club which is chicken with an extra layer of bread like a big mac but in sandwich form but chicken instead of beef as well so nothing like a big mac it's a lot of bread

quite a lot of bread I love tuna my main love of tuna comes courtesy of tuna sandwiches may not be the most popular choice in this fight but I am throwing my weight behind that one. Okay. I like tuna,

but I don't really have it in sandwiches, and I'm quite a chicken sandwich fan. So I would go more with the club. So, Mikey, you might have to break the tie. I'm going to go in my tuna. I think it's a wonderful sandwich filling. Tuna crunch,

but a sweet corn, bit of red onion. Oh, lovely. Yeah, I don't want that in there. I just want you. Just straight up, Gina. I just want my sloppy sad fish meat. That's what I want.

Yeah, it's a great way to make everyone on the same. train coaches you hate you when you bust out the tuna sandwich. It's because they're jealous. And now move on to the sweet fight. We've got peanut butter and jelly, or peanut butter and jam, and Nutella in a sandwich. Oh, my God, a Nutella sandwich. Or a Peeb and J. Oh, really?

I've never had Pee B and J. I don't like peanut butter, for starters. But then I also don't like Nutella because it's chocolate. So maybe Ben, you can just choose your favorite. Well, Pee and J is, that's a big American classic. Not, doesn't nearly have the foothold over here that it does over there. No, no. I can't say I've ever, well, maybe I had an Nutella sandwich,

but it would have been supermarket chocolate spread, perhaps when I was a child. But it's the kind of thing that I consider a, and same with peanut butter, I consider a toast topping rather than a sandwich filler. So I'll go chocolate spread, I suppose. Oh, I was going to go PB&J. for this one. I told him, Peter,

you have to break the tie. Oh, man. Probably on balance, if I had to have one or the other, I'd maybe go Peeby and J. I don't, I really, I mean, don't want either of them,

thanks. I'll have a vegan crass. Well, VVJ is continuing to the next round, even though no one particularly likes it. Yeah. What a bracket. Oh, dear.

I used to have Nutella sandwiches all the time as a kid, but I think about it now, and it just makes me kind of want to be, sick it's a lot it's a lot you know i did experiment with a toasty maker and uh chocolate spread in my in my adulthood and while the the prospect is very attractive not to you peter obviously but little pockets of toasted chocolate filling um it turns into this uh sort of molten lava kind of yeah oh i can imagine not only is it hotter than the sun but it as soon as you bite into it

It goes everywhere. It leaks all over your hands. It just drizzles. It's liquid. It just drizzles out. It doesn't work. Gives you first degree burns. It's not.

Don't try it, basically. It sounds so nice as well. That has potential, but sadly it's just become something like it. You love to let it cool down. And then you're just eating a chocolate bar, aren't you? With extra steps.

Not good. Not good. Next up, we've got the classic plowmans, which I guess for people, not from England. That is cheese and onions. a sandwich accompanied with like a pickle

of sorts. And by pickle we don't mean like a vegetable. Oh yeah. What the hell is pickle then if not pickle? It's like a relish maybe is that how you describe it? Yeah it's like a relishy chummy. It's like a preserve it's not an actual

sliced pickle. Yeah. Yeah it's nice. It gives a bit of tang to the sandwich. Yeah. And it's Plowman's versus the trusty old jam sandwich. Jam sandwich. I don't like. pickle yeah yeah i'm not a fan of pickle and i don't think i'd want onions in my uh sandwich either yeah um i've not had a jam sandwich since it was about seven but yeah i'd go for that

i suppose why don't they sell jam sandwiches in tesco yeah no because seven-year-olds don't go to tesco maybe maybe that's it i mean i three people agree that rave have a jam sandwich and a plan and tesco sells plan ones that's true but neither of us are northern northern or none of us are northern like working class people from clown men. Plow men, yes. Yeah. Yeah, I was associate jam sandwiches like picnics and stuff. It's a nice little sandwich.

Yeah. Yeah. Next, we've got just cheese. There's a cheese on its own versus just ham. Oh, what a sad, sad state. This is the cheap end of the Tesco meal deal. I don't mind that shitty way for thin ham stuff. if it's with something else in a sandwich.

Yeah. But the ham to, if you're having a ham sandwich, it has to be proper ham. I have had sad, I had sad ham sandwiches throughout my entire school life. So I'd have a wedge of bad cheddar any day between two slices of bread, personally. Putting aside my dietary requirements,

I would probably prefer to have the cheese. I do occasionally get the just ham from Tesco Meal Deal if I kind of feel like I almost want a sandwich but I don't really want a proper one and I'll be like I'll get the fake sandwich and just eat that so I kind of feel like I'm getting

something in me but not a whole pile of bacon and mayo and stuff you know it's a sustenance sandwich yeah cheese is a fair way now I'm going to agree with that one yeah good actually to be fair most cheeses in a sandwich are pretty good especially if you had a little bit of tomato or whatever, it's cheese, cheese salad.

That sounds gross. Next up is prawn mayonnaise versus coronation chicken, which I believe that's a British. Well, of course it's a British one is named after the Queen's coronation. Yeah, it was made for her coronation. The idea was it was something that you can, that sort of tastes quite interesting and special,

but it's actually really relatively easy to make at home. Just like the queen. Yes. I think the coronation bit of it is kind of just, it's like mayo and like a spice or something. It's actually really simple to make. It's something like that. Yeah, it's, it's, um, mayo and curry, uh, mayo and curry powder. That's, that's how you make a coronation chicken.

Sometimes it look like saltana's in there. Yeah, that's the deal breaker for me. The saltas. Oh, the sultana. Yeah. Oh, do they put sultanas in it? I didn't know that. Usually when you buy a coronation chicken, you get like little pockets of sultana.

It does ruin the whole sandwich. It is disgusting. And I'm so sad because I've had. Coronation Chicken Sandwich. There was a point where my only experience with Coronation Chicken sandwiches was without the Sultanas in it. And I was like, this is fucking delicious. It's like a curry in a sandwich.

It's amazing. And then I had saltanas in it once and it put me off Coronation Chicken. Never trust that. For life. I also, I don't tend to, I've looked at Coronation Chicken sandwiches before and thought, oh, I might get that this week. And then I've not because it's another sandwich where I feel like I don't want to open. put in a coronation chicken packet in a shared space.

Like I probably wouldn't buy a chicken teaker sandwich, even though chicken teak is pretty good, I think. But, you know, you just, the entire room has to essentially taste what you're eating. Yeah, yeah. So, where, what would, prawn and mayo, Peter, you agree? I guess prawn, I do, I really like prawns. I wouldn't, it would have to be very light on the mayo. I'd rather just have prawns in there, really.

God, I thought, I like prawn mayo sandwiches. I thought prawn mayo would be like a sheer five get out of here. I think it's the most disgusting sandwich possible, but hey, here we are. I think it is when it's soggy. It's super mayo-y, but I do like prawn sandwich. I love pro-mao. Fair, fair. Next, you can tell I started to run out of sandwiches with this one, a toast sandwich.

Oh, yeah. Which is a toasted bit of bread in between two untoastered bits of bread with salt and pepper to taste. It is lovely, don't judge me. and the breakfast sandwich featuring bacon and sausage and I guess potentially like that bit of scrambled egg of sorts whenever you buy like a breakfast sandwich

for me it's quite a disgusting combination of like cold meats and egg it's not yeah the egg always puts me off the breakfast sandwich I'd probably be highly likely to get it if it didn't have crap egg in it yeah it's like at that point like you get it hot

you know like in a big bap that's way to do it I like scrambled eggs, but I don't want it just sitting on a Tesco shelf for a day, you know. Getting to Northern Meets. But then I've never gone for the, I've never tried a toast sandwich, and I've always thought I'd like to try one at some point. It's worth a go. I mean, as someone who likes bread, it's an easy win for me because it's just bread,

but it's not as bad as it sounds. I'm going to vote for the toast sandwich myself on this one. I've never had a toast sandwich. Are you partial to a breakfast sandwich or does any part of that put you off? Well, I'd eat a breakfast sandwich, but it's not my first choice. Yeah. So I'll probably go with that. Yeah, I will.

I think I'll go with breakfast sandwich, especially since at first you didn't actually mention the egg until the last minute, Mikey. So I might sort of pretend the egg is not really in there very much. That's fine. You can pick it out. That's up to you. Yeah. And now the last heat before we get onto the semis or quarters or whatever it is we're at, it's the trusty-old BLT, bacon lettuce, tomato, and the meatball sandwich

going a bit extravagant like chicken and bacon there's so many different Yeah, where's chicken and bacon? There's so many classic sandwiches that have chicken bacon and stuffing. Oh God, yeah, I forgot about that one. Chocolate spread.

This is always Bread in bread. This is always the nightmare of me making these. We get to the end, it's like, what about these 10 obvious choices? Ham and cheese together I was in a weird spot

because I've got all the constituent parts and other sandwich in some of these but not together how much crossover did I want so I kind of went for the biggest you know differences at least but yes you're right

I've missed out some real classics this is this is the very messed up the best sandwich of these ones yes yes so sorry say this again they were so ridiculous that my brain's forgotten them.

A BLT? That's not ridiculous. It's BLT. And meatball, right. I've never had a meatball sandwich. That's a real fath to eat, surely. I've never had one because they just look like such a pain in the ass. I'm quite partial to them.

They're quite nice for like a little bit of tomato sauce on them. Nice tomato sauce, not just ketchup. But yeah, I'm not going to argue against BLT on that. That's an actual proper sandwich, isn't it? Do you guys remember what Tesco did a lasagna sandwich? Whoa. Yeah. With pasta in it?

Yeah. That could... I guess you could do like a really weird version of that where instead of pasture sheets you just... I'll find a photo. You crush down some bread so it's really thin and use that as the sheets instead. I'll tell you another one, Mikey, that you missed out.

It wouldn't have won because it's got an ingredient that's controversial in it. But Tesco they've just brought back the beef and horseradish which I'm quite partial to. The horseradish isn't very strong. I know horseradish can be like really intense but they use a really mild one.

And I'm mostly just in it for the beef. just tastes like it might as well be beef and mayo. But I started eating that about six months ago. I had it for about three days in a row after I'd sort of discovered that I really liked it. And I was like, yeah, this is like red meat. It's better than having bacon in my chicken sandwich. Yeah. And then after having it, buying it three times, they suddenly discontinued it.

And I don't know if it's like a seasonal thing. They only do it six months of the year, but it's come back now. Weird. And that's what I'm getting for my lunches sometimes. Yeah, I make the most bit while it's here. Yeah. That lasagna sandwich looks abhorrent. That is, I forgot like, well, like, I think mince was part of Bolognese, and that just looks really not fun.

I mean, I guess mince is just crushed meatballs at the end of the day. Is the really pale yellow bit supposed to be the top of the lasagna, or is that butter? Because that's so pale. There's cheese in there, but there's also a strip of pasta sheet. Oh, right. Okay, that's the pasta, yeah. There's a layer of white sauce as well in there, but it looks quite thick white sauce. Also, I'm sorry, Michael.

Can we circle back to where you said that mince is crushed meatballs? Like all meat products descend from meatballs. As opposed to meatballs being reconstituted mint. No, no, no. The way they make mince is they get meatballs and crush the bar. They make the meatballs first. Any meatballs they don't sell. That's literally everything else that comes from Macau.

Oh dear. Yeah. I made sense in my head. I mean, I'm right. Yeah. I'm right. No, you're not in the most wrong about where possible. Yeah.

Oh my God. There's a 3,000 by 2,304 kicks or close up photo of a paella sandwich here. Would you like to see it? Yes, please. It's actually... If only for the way you said paella in the Spanish way, I appreciate that. Sorry, paella.

it's actually kind of disgusting to look at. It's so big. Good God, you can really see the detail on the prawn. Oh, yeah, that's an intense cross-section of a prawn there. That makes me, oh God, no, it's the rice as well. God, you just look like worms. Yeah, that's not great, is it? Michael, what about roast beef and horseradish?

There's another one. That's what I said before. Oh, you did, sorry. I considered it. but I use my own personal bias here as not being a fan of beep sandwiches. That's fine. I wouldn't eat it either. Yeah, fair enough.

I understand it's not popular. What I should have done was just collated every sandwich from Tesco. You bought them all. Yeah. Like, there's so many good options saying. I pulled a few and then I went for a fucking toast sandwich. It's fine. It's fine.

You gave a place to egg and cress and left out chicken. No, it's the chocolate spread sandwich that gets me. Yeah, I mean, the weirdest one, the weird ones are offensive, but to me, like, the fact that Egg and Cress even got, I mean, that doesn't even have, like, a weird novelty to it. That's just like, what the hell are you doing here? To me, Egg and Cress and Pro Maneers are in the same level, like, the one of the same. You've forgotten that one as well, Michael. Free and spiced cranberry chutney.

Free and spiced cranberry chutney. Oh, you didn't do the seasonal turkey and trimmings either. Oh, God. we get, please. I know, I miss out a lot of sandwiches. We're getting into the Tory sandwiches now. Can we do a Michael's tournament tournament and talk about how shit this one was? Oh dear.

Michael, I'm really proud of you and I'm glad you. Yeah, that's fine. It's fine. Do you want to even finish this? Yes, yes, we do. We do. I'm only teasing. But not before we acknowledge the sad's lack of the boxing dough triple.

The boxing. What is that middle one? It's ham-hot Chicken and spinach. And it, oh. Oh, Piccoli. Lily, yeah. Wow.

There's a Wensleydale carrot and orange chutney sandwich which sounds fucking vile. The Boxing Tricle, that's what you'd be doing after eating this. It needs to be stopped. Because what you want after you've had a whole day of eating loads of food

is an M&S meal deal with three sandwiches in it. Oh my God. With red traffic lights all down the nutrition of Info. Is it any coincidence that exclusively old people shop at M&S and it's mainly old people

who are dying every day? That's a good point. Yeah. What's the high? Salt, 46% of your daily amount of salt in that one triple. That is so much of your daily allowance. 5% from every pack

is shared between two charities. what do they get your stuff when you die really pushing the boat out m and s food 5% goes to two charities oh dear right should we get on to the semi-final of the weird sandwich consortium it's cheese toasty versus the tuna sandwich

cheese toasty I fucking love tuna but yeah cheese toasty please yeah it's hard to argue I think we might have a winner just it's well maybe not maybe it's all to win for because judging by the rest of them PB and J versus just a jam sandwich You could have it with or without peanut butter I'd rather have it without thanks

Oh my God I said I chose these so they're all different enough But then we've got two of the same pre-you're like I really fuck this Jam or jam and peanut butter Jam I suppose Sorry I mean My Which one are you going for

Peter? It's jam isn't it? Yeah just jam Just the jelly For me thanks Jesus Christ Cheese versus prawn mayonnaise Prawn mayo

For me Prawn mayo maybe Yeah I don't agree But fair What a sad Mikey Mikes

Hates the fact That this is getting To the semi-finals Yeah It's just not Warrant his place here We've got A breakfast sandwich

versus a BLT BLT. I think I'd say breakfast, yeah, I'd say breakfast, I think. I'm going to put a voting for BLT for that one.

Okay, fair enough. Breakfast lettuce tomato or the ultimate sandwich. This feels like such a sad semi-final now. That was a quarterfinal now.

This is what the local, all local Tescoes look like at lunchtime now. These are the only salmon left in there. It's just egg and cress and jam. Actually, this semifinal reminds me a weird thing.

So we've got cheese and cheese toasty versus the jam sandwich. I know people who have cheese and jam sandwiches. No. No, weird. Yeah, I was revolted by it, but it's, they are good at it. It's like cheese and fruit. That goes together. Why not eat in a sandwich?

Cheese only goes with malted milk biscuits. Oh. And wine. And wine. And wine. So cheese toasty for that one. Cheese toast. And prawn main is versus BLT.

God, now I look at this whole, I've been doing this in a Photoshop document and now I look at this just arena of sandwiches. I'm miserable just looking at them. One bad selection. BLT? I'm going to have a prawn mayo, maybe? BLT, I would probably end up buying

because it feels like you get more sandwich because it's a thick boy. But I would honestly prefer the flavor of the prawn mayo. To be fair, I keep imagining the BLT has also got chicken in it, which obviously doesn't because that would be B-C-L-T. But, yeah, just bacon and then salad is kind of a bit sad in a way. Well, well, that said, I'm going to vote for the BLT.

Sorry, Prerner. I might switch teams there and go with Ben. Is the BLT not me? No, I don't think so. Has the prawn mayo gone to the fucking final? gone to the final but fortunately this is a disgrace it's up against a cheese toasty

which you can't get from you can't you can't it's not really a sandwich I know I realized that just as I dragged it into the final podium I was like yeah this is this is the least sandwich of them all it's like someone saying to you

would you rather have a meal deal or a cheese toastie well probably a cheese toasty but sure this is almost definitely the last time I ever do a food fight No, don't. It's too fraught with danger.

That's what's so good about them. Well, in an unbelievable finale, we've got the cheese toasty versus prawn mayonnaise. There's the two best sandwiches. How did that happen? I don't know. I don't know what to choose because cheese toasties are objectively amazing, but they go cold super quick. They're not convenient food. Wow.

I love a cheese toastie. If I can be asked to make one, it's like a top lunch for me. But you can't get them from a supermarket. No, that's true. And if you made one at home in the morning and brought it to work with you, you'd hard to think there was something wrong with you.

Yeah. You can get them from really fun. You can get them from like Pratt and they'll heat it up for you. Remelt the cheese. You take your own sandwich in. to Pratt and ask them to heat up. No, I mean, you can buy one from Pratt and not warm it.

I don't mean you can... Can you heat up? Can I argue your Toasty maker, please? I think cheese toasty still has to win. I'm not having prawn, mayo, win the sandwich. It would almost be fitting if it did win, no, I think. Yeah, well, I mean, it would be fitting of either of these ones, because one's not the best sandwich, and one is not a sandwich.

Not a sandwich. Brilliant. My thoughts for the cheese toasty. I'll go for prawn mayo because it's a sandwich. Just... The winner of the sandwich fight is a cheese toasty. Of course. The only way that would be a sandwich is if you put two cheese toasties together

with a third one in the middle. Or put it a cheese toasty between two slices of cold bread. Are we arguing semantics here? Is a cheese toasty not a sandwich? It was a sandwich and then you toasted it. And now it's a fucking, what was it, a calzone or a pizza? It's a calzone, that's, yeah. What, really?

Okay, I'm asking Google, it is a cheese? Basically a burger. It's a pasty. You've made a pasta. Yeah, I guess there's a lot more other words that fit it than sandwich. Well, there we go, the winner is not a sandwich. Thanks, Michael. That was a lot of fun, Mikey.

please don't stop doing food fights God, it's just yeah, it's fine it's fine we have fun don't we We do We certainly do have fun Michael

At your expense I take it very well I deserve for this one I can't even hide away from that We've got a question here From Demica Kempton on Twitter who says When I see silica gel

It really is the food episode Isn't it It's like Silica gel When I see silica gel, I think of Mikey. When I look at my 50P collection, I think of Peter. Keep away, it says in parentheses. And whenever I'm cutting open a box, I hear Ben's voice saying,

cut away from you, what are things that you guys see or do that remind you of each other, all the love? Silic gel definitely still reminds me of Michael every time I see it. Like, if me and Amy are opening a parcel, and if either one of us sees the silica gel, get out and go, no, Mikey. Put it in a special goodie bag for the next time.

Yeah, we've got a big like stock of all. You've been saving up all the years to give me one year for my birthday. Yeah. What else reminds me of you guys? KFC and Ben Potter are intrinsically linked in my head forever.

I could think of the kernel. I could think of anyone else, but I just remember during video, it's been, I think, mentioned KFC at least once a week. It's been a lot. time since I've had KFC and I've got a fucking voucher. People were so, I don't if you heard about this, Mikey, but people in the office were really cross, but Peter was off

as well actually. I was off. KFC UK, who I forgot, followed me. Oh, after the KFC thing. You remember the KFC thing I brought along where I talked about the Lifetime movie starring Mario Lopez? Um, a Poddiet's listener worked on the social media team for KFC UK and tweeted about us. And I forgot that they followed me, which is by the by in the story. They tweeted out that it was like international give back day or something like that. So they were giving away. Random act of kindness day. Oh, that was it. Yeah. So they were some bullshit holiday. So they were giving away free meals to anyone who would want one. Oh, not anyone who would want one. That fucking hour. To random people. They just said, they just said, reply with your order.

So I posted it in the group, the office Slack and just said, hey, you know, everyone give this a go. And I was one of the first responses, like, oh, I'd like this meal, please. And everyone was giving it a go. And then a few minutes later, they replied to me and said, what a great order. You've got it. And then they DM'd me a voucher for £10 to go get my meal, which I haven't done yet. And Ashton in particular, I was really cross.

Like, she accused me of insider trading because... Yeah, you're using your clout for personal game. I didn't know. I forgot. though that's the thing i forgot and you would have thought it would have been easy for them to just see that they followed me and think now that's that that's too obvious let's go for another person well congratulations on winning ben now everyone else in the whole office hates you guys you know what i don't care i can give a fuck yeah you got a c you're doing well same bam

oh what do it reminds me of peter i don't i want to avoid the obvious of national trust in castles Yeah, it is like every time me and Peter, me and Claudia go somewhere nice and I was like in my head like, oh Peter wouldn't enjoy this before you were here. Yeah. I think I would probably think of Ben if I ever saw a square pizza.

Oh man. It's always food, isn't it? Yeah, well, yeah. Actually, whenever I see the word snacks and I think it ended my repertoire because of, I think, it might be both of you, but I mayn't remember Peter talking about it.

Snacks. Snacks from that video of the little baby. And so every time I see the word snacks in my head, I go, Snacks. Yeah, that'll do it. I'm trying to think of anything else reminds me of you other than silica gel, which is provided by Demika Kempton. What about you, Ben?

Have you got any? Anytime I come across like any kind of boutique, vegan outlet, I think of Michael Johnson. There's one in. town near my parents where I picked up a couple of Christmas presents and everything in the store was vegan, coffee, various dry ingredients, all sorts of sort of homeware and stuff. And I thought, wow, what a Michael Johnson shop? Those shops are great if you want to spend like two pound on some carrots.

Yes, it's expensive. It's expensive. It's raw produce for very rich people most of the time. Me and Amy have a habit of if we've got nothing to watch. And if we're just like sitting in front of the sofa, sitting on the sofa in front of the TV for half an hour, maybe we're heading off somewhere. We've got plans.

We just want to kill half an hour. We're quite, we're prone to watching like fail compilations, just people falling over and stuff. Like we're still, we've never matured beyond that point. And we have a habit of, there are certain kind of categories of things

where if we see someone about to do a specific kind of fail, that they're doing a certain activity, there are people that we know who relate said activity and we sort of shout their name as though they're the person on the screen so if we see someone playing golf like Amy's dad is quite fond of golf

and so if it comes up with a guy who's about to like fall in a pond playing golf we'll go dad no or like you know something like that or if we see I'm trying to think of maybe like a mutual friend as an example but maybe like if we saw

a girl with a big knife in the kitchen we might go Ashton please and if we see a young person skating it's quite often Mikey no at this point so you entered the repertoire there Mikey please don't do it

on honour I like that I actually feel really invested in the pain that those poor people are going to suffer in a few seconds time yeah there is of course the classic Kis Kis Kis

yeah which is you know I hear that talk talk talk and i hear that spoken about on um the cultaholic podcast actually because apparently it's a thing that owen and andrew do yeah Andrew i think got it from us well yeah i assumed as much but owen they they talk about like jack talks about it disparagingly like oh they do this stupid thing where they do keys key it's the stupid thing that those two do and i'm there listening and thinking well it's not theirs though is it well i've talked about this before i don't think i've talked about on potty it, but I love

the spread, the viral spread of Key's gone everywhere, isn't it? It's good. Well, because I saw, I was once, I think I was tagged in a tweet where someone that Andrew knows, like not through work, I think someone he just knows, like a close friend, she'd put Keys Keys

and it had maybe said like, Andrew, I'll always blame you for making me say this all the time now, and he like tagged me in it and said, oh it's Peter. And just to know, like, I remember Patient Zero. I remember the man who's behind me and Amy just went, Kiskees.

And then, you know, we did it on Podiates, then we started doing it on Triple Jump. Then Andrew got it from either Pollyets or Triple Jump. I don't know. And he's doing it with Owen. And it was like Andrew or Owen's friend now who's never met me and certainly never met that man is saying Kiskees.

It just spreads like wildfire. That's amazing. It's good stuff. Let's continue to track the progress of Kis Kis as it spreads and attains world domination. Listener, if you ever come across someone who's saying keys keys, can you give us the six degrees of Kevin Bacon to get back to us and work out how it got to them?

We need to know. I'd love to see. Good, well, it's time for Ben. It's Ben time. Here's my thing. I have four news stories. Are they real? Are they fake?

There might be satirical, The Onion news articles. They might be real news articles. I have gone through a slightly different approach this time of renaming these headlines to make them a little harder to guess. And instead of trying to make them sound fake or make them sound real, what I've done is I've just given a very short shit description of what the article's about.

So there's even less of a chance that you can get it, I think. Oh, good. You ready? Yeah. So I've got four. I'll run through them first, and then you can ask it, you can guess if they're real or not. Number one, sausage saves dog in Hampshire.

Right. Number two, Roomba escapes a hotel in Cambridge. Number three, guerrillas are intimidated by Shaquille O'Neal. Right. Number four, Furry's launch book saving campaign. Okay. God, this is a lot harder, isn't it? isn't it?

So first up, sausage saves dog in Hampshire. I think I know one of these to be true. Okay. The first one. Sausage saves sandwich. Saundsafed sandwich. You know what I don't mean?

Sausage saves dog. Yeah. How would that? Maybe this could be true through some kind of twist of fate. Like maybe a dog accidentally ingested poison and it made it give it a bad tum-tum. And then it ate a very sour. soured sausage and that made it

vomit up the poison. That's the most convoluted justification I could ever think of. Huh. Yeah, I'm going to say that's real, mainly because I want to know how that happened. That is real. Wow. The real headline is, dog rescued

from drowning after sausage dangled from drone in Hampshire. Oh, brilliant. The Jack Russell Terrier was in danger of being overwhelmed by rising tides when she was found stranded on mudflats in Haven't. The dog, called Millie had gone missing after slipping her lead and was on the run for four days.

Wow. So, they attached, there's a photo. Okay. They attached a sausage to a drone and they flew it over the top of the dog and the dog followed it back to the shore. There it is. For a minute I had an image that they like fished for the dog

and the dog bit onto the sausage and then the drone carried the dog away. Dangling from the drone. No, there's the setup there. You've got the drone You've got some string And there's the sausage Just that's brilliant

That's tied to the end That is fantastic What a good idea Yeah So they got they got her back They got Millie back Millie safe This was last month

Millie's okay Thank God Next story Rumba escapes a hotel in Cambridge I will say True We recently got one like, well, not a rumor, but an off-brand rumor for just keeping our downstairs area in check

because cats just trailing crap in here everywhere. The other day, that rumor managed to attach itself to the little mats where we put Karen's food. It got like stuck in the mechanism. So there's Roomba for an unknown amount of time just dragging around the food around downstairs. And then we've got a big cardboard box downstairs, which would be mean it throughout for weeks, but Karen like sitting in it, so we kept it there for her. And then, so I come downstairs, I'm like, oh, where the hell's Karen's food?

And it takes me 10 minutes to realize the rumor has managed to drag everything into this big cardboard box and obviously just got in there, got stuck and shut itself down and hidden itself from us. Wow. It's a nightmare.

So knowing that, that rumors can do that, I'm going to say, yeah, Rumba definitely a skip from a hotel. This one I think I know. I think the way this was written by some outlets was like, it was like a wonderful heartwarming homecoming story.

It was like, but finally returned home after something or other. Is this true? This is true. And I applaud the BBC News article for the dramatization of events. Right. And we'll read it to. It's not very long.

Robot vacuum cleaner escapes from Cambridge Travel Lodge is the title of the article. A robot vacuum cleaner made a break for freedom after giving staff the slip at a travel lodge hotel. The automated cleaner failed to stop at the front door of the hotel in Orchard Park in Cambridge on Thursday and were still on the loose the following day. Staff said it just kept going and could be anywhere, while well-wishes on social media hoped the vacuum enjoyed its travels, as it has no natural predators in the wild. That's it. Yeah, that's right.

It was found under a hedge on Friday. Staff at the hotel posted the story of the robot vacuum's great escape on social media, asking for it to be returned if found. Today we had one of our new robot vacuums run for its life, the assistant manager wrote. normally sensed the lip at the entrance to the hotel and turn around, but this one decided to make a run for it. Its disappearance was not noticed for about 15 minutes, and despite a search, it appeared the vacuum had made a clean break for it. Very nice. The assistant manager assumed it might have been found and taken, and pointed out it was only compatible with the docking and charging at the charging station at the hotel, so it was useless to anyone else.

While some readers joked about the robot's adventures, one feared for its safety in the great outdoors, pointing out that nature abhors a vacuum. Whatever. You get that? Yeah. Can I explain it? It's just a phrase, isn't it? It's like, I think it means where there's a space or a niche not yet filled in nature, it will always fill it with, you know, nature is going to make little plants and life and stuff grow, either a physical place or if there's just a gap in the kind of food chain or the, you know, the circle of life. It will fill that in.

I believe that's the phrase. Gotcha. However, much to everyone's relief, the device was found nestled under a hedge on Friday afternoon by A, and it says in parentheses, human hotel cleaner, sprucing up the front drive.

It was dusted off and is now back sitting happily on a shelf with the rest of its robot vacuum family. The hotel confirmed. Oh, cute. Oh, yeah. That was a real one. Next news story is

Gorillas are intimidated by Shaquille O'Neal. this sounds believable but I don't know I could say because yeah how tall is Shaq like 6-8 he's a big boy how tall is I could I could totally see

Shack intimidating gorilla if he's just been to a zoo or out into the you know the wild where the gorillas actually live God he's 7 foot 1 yeah I can also very easily see this is an onion article, so I'm going to go onion for this one.

I'm going to say it's real. It is real. Whoa! Here's the headline. Shaquille O'Neal says Gorillas freak out when he comes near, and Zoo Miami Executive confirms they are intimidated by his large size. So this is from the big podcast with Shaq episode. The former NBA big man explained that guerrillas freak out when he shows up at zoos and that they want to fight him.

Shaq even called an executive from Zoo Miami during the podcast who confirmed the tale. The conversation came up when Shaq was contemplating whether to let his gray hair grow out, joking that he would be a silverback gorilla and not a silver fox. This led to Shaq, a huge zoo aficionado explaining how guerrillas react to his size when he shows up. So there we are. Nice. They are terrified of him. that's i mean gorillas themselves are absolutely terrifying so to have that power over them my god

spooky final one furries launch book saving campaign oh so so non-specific so few details i'll say this one could be onion i'm going to say real because with my limited knowledge of furies i don't know why it sounds like furies can get behind you know campaigns and really really bring some vigour to things. I feel like maybe there's been a spout of like book burnings in America and like people trying to ban books in schools. Maybe they're like trying to get behind one and try

and save it. I'm going to go real. They're all real. It's a real one. Wow! Furries raise money for libraries after mayor threatens to withhold funds due to LGBT plus books. The furry community is taking charge of leading fundraising efforts for the Madison County

library system and raised thousands of dollars as funding for the library hangs in The system entered the spotlight after Ridgeland Mayor Jean McGee said he would withhold 110,000 in annual spending, annual funding, sorry, after books with LGBTQ plus themes and authors were put on display. Jesus. Good on you. Well done. Not to the man with holding the books. Go fairies.

Go fairies, go. And those are my things. That's my thing. It's all done now. Beautiful. Thank you very much. The end. I enjoyed that.

I just want to point out, I just scroll to. through the image feed and it is all food it's not nothing yeah yeah true and Dave's a snack

so that counts yeah nailed it we've got one final question here from Richard Major at R Major 86 on Twitter

who says who would you play in a biopic of their life good question so it needs to be someone maybe have a passing resemblance to

although it's amazing what these like you know like makeup hair and makeup people can do you know when they cast like so and so in in a biopic and you're like what really and then they do a side by side photo when they're actually in there oh who's it's it's um Daniel Radcliffe's playing weird al isn't he yes oh yeah it looks weird but maybe maybe he could properly do it do it

just to see an action so either um as i say a passing resemblance or maybe someone you feel that you could channel in some way. Or both. It's a tricky one. I mean, Ben, you could play any blonde band. They could. It's just which one, you know? There's so many.

How about I'd like to play Dave Benson Phillips. Yeah? Yeah, I think I could do it justice. I pull it off. I had two people. on Friday, like in two entirely separate conversations, say I was a lot like Charlie Day. Okay. I don't, like, like, yeah, I kind of got like, especially when I've had a bit of drink.

Like, my energy ramps up a bit and I get really frantic when I talk. So I think, yeah, I'd have to go to the set every day drunk. But I think, yeah, maybe I could take on the Charlie Day aura, take on his energy. I'm told I look like some guy. from Coronation Street who I don't know someone Barlow

people used to tweet that in the video's year No not Ken he's like 80 but I think his grandson or something Gary Gary but

maybe maybe the puppeteer what's his name Dave Chapman who puppeteered the neighbour's cat and Otis the Ardvark The love and respect I have for him And the fact that our colouration is somewhat similar

In that he's got kind of Mid blonde brown hair, I think So that'll do It's weird to say that Because I just googled him to remind myself And all the images of him are in black and white Really? I don't really look anything like him facially

But I'll leave that to yeah CG I reckon with a bit of hair it'll all work out it'll be beautiful yeah nice

yeah that's where I'll be well that's it that's the end of the podcast I hope you enjoyed it I'm gonna pull up the YouTube channel oh yes of course

it's that time absolutely we need to find out what happened Mike is there some sort of website some sort of shop kind of deal

I think you're right if you go on to your web browser of choice and type into that their navigation bar, store.orgscast.com. You'll be greeted with a bounty of wonderful goodies and tidbits that you can buy. But best of all, if you navigate over to the video section of that website, you'll find huddies, mugs, t-shirts, and that's it. And they're all beautiful, they're all wonderful.

They all make you look very cool, and I highly recommend buying all of them, all of them. There's no discount code still, so keep an eye on the Yokescast. Twitter, if you want to save a little bit of money, or maybe you'll get free international postage. Usually around like big holidays, it's worth keeping an eye out. And, uh, yeah, head over to store.orgas.com and peruse our selection of fine wares. Nice. Why not go to YouTube, Twitter, Facebook.com forward slash vidiates official.

Bit.L.Y. forward slash vidiates official discord as well if you want to go join our discord and go chat with some people. Twitch.tv.TV forward slash video. it's official as well we have just used that for a wonderful charity stream we hope as many of you made it as possible or are watching

or watch the Vod perhaps after the fact but thank you for giving you so generously if indeed you did and if you didn't yes how dare you you can give to us instead at streamlabs.com forward slash potty it's donations three pounds or more to get a shout out

at the beginning and the end of the show Mikey what have we got oh god I forgot that was coming next. We've got Miss Caroline, my chinko. The generous, potty its NFTs, Licking Moon Fuck Rocks.

The generous Ben's big blue balls, spotted Richard, Caroline, at Peter's wedding. There he did it again there. The generous, once again, I just moved. My bananas are gone missing. Crencles McThunders Snorch.

My brother wrote a shit book. Finn Tristam. Don Ack O'7. Fred W. wants to lick Peter Yom 420 and Stephen Scourdes. Also, Vidyots is not a cult, the very generous piece. David, no, Dick Davidinson, my wide, you wreath Raz tings. Hawkman 105, Lord Brottovich, specky-becky, bon bon son, Stephen Skodes. Bowl cut, don't forget episode 69 dudes.

Alf Ramsey's Porn Dungeon David Dick in Minge and Mr. Blobby becomes a sous chef And we also have Will You Pooh, Juan me McJohnson With 50p of garlic LA Knight, yeah

Mr Macca Many Cox go ass to mouth John Bonbonbonson Joris, sorry Bon Bonbonson, yes You know it's all about the coom Lorry Wales Yee Bob

Guy Incognito It's Tiny Peep's Veronica Green Boba Fetish Boba Fetish Cheggers in Paris Big Booba Buddha and Dom's Dick in de Bunga Hole There we are

I've just realised I was very confused by the Veronica Green one but it's is Tiny Peep's Veronica Green I was wondering why it's I don't know who Veronica Green is but that makes more sense

they're asking if I am there That does make sense I misread that Veronica Green Drag Queen Okay fine Yeah

Are they wear Round-rimmed glasses Okay I think the The What's the word The resemblance Is uncanny

Ego gents It's loading There I am Oh on the right Kinder On the right Just like me Yeah

I'll add it to the thread Sure Yeah sure Streamlabs.com forward slash potty It's donations Three pounds or more Thank you

you so much. What's out on videos this week four years ago? Four years ago, well, we've got in the spotlight, Call of Cthulhu, the official video game. Prove it, Cooking Mama 3, live action challenge. Wow.

That's where it all began, the cooking. Yes, where it started. Food once again. In the spotlight, a plague tale innocence. Memory cards for February the 19th. Five ways to know. If Toad from Mario, we're secretly seeing your wife.

Oh, goodness. Oh, beautiful, beautiful. Dark Souls, backwards controller challenge. That's a piece of cake. Worst games ever, CSI, Three Dimensions of Murder. Nathan Akraman, Fine Arts Studio. We went to a cardboard arcade. We did.

Videots are now sponsored by Turtle Beach. Were we? Yeah, well, yeah, I guess. that video that turtle beach video I watched it the other week and it's stunningly good I've forgotten so many of these things now

yeah I've forgotten all about it memory cards for February 26th which is bully Pokemon Stadium and something else it's just cut off but there you go Oh Star Wars Rebellion Post some tat number three

We were finally sent The Game which I can only assume was the first of many Hannah Montana's surely GTA the bus that wouldn't slow down

challenge that was a piece of cake where we had a mod a speed mod on the bus would blow up yeah

in the spotlight moss plus a code giveaway whoa skyrim zoo chapter one yes

fantastic beginning of a legendary series indeed in the spotlight kingdom come deliverance

five video game characters who are Total assholes off camera. That now has limited ads, apparently. Is that because it's got Hitler, or that photoshopped Hitler in the thumbnail?

Yeah, probably, probably. God, there's loads. There's a whole extra week of content here because we delayed the episode. Vidiot's Patreon and podcast announcement. So, yeah, I guess we were moving into Patreon there. Memory cards for March the 5th, Yoshi Tomb Raider, Super Smash Bros.

Poddietz, episode one, went out on 6th of March. Oh, wow. So this is an anniversary episode, actually, guys. We're like, we're like X years and two days old. How many is that? Four years. Four years and two days.

Third anniversary. Yeah. We really did it. And also, lastly, prove it, Pokemon Yellow, part one. So that was playing the game. That's Pamusek, wasn't it? Yeah, Palmusik. In the lead up to the Power Moussake.

Moosek egg challenge which was quite something spectacular why do why was it

always eggs with us we did eggs for that one I think the Dunster one I can't remember

what game that was where we had yeah just medieval games yeah yeah

we had to there's a challenge in that where we had to catch eggs in a basket yeah we just love eggs

we do love eggs to be fair just an easy go to I suppose yeah he didn't

choose egg and Chris sandwich wow no I don't remember

going to buy those eggs I suppose we must have just go into a shop and buy some eggs at the last minute. There might have been some at my grandma's house. Yeah, maybe. So that could have been it. Wonderful.

Thank you, Peter. You're welcome. Michael, where are you on the internet? At Paraboy on Twitter is the best place to find me. And at Paraboy on Twitch, I stream on occasion. I stream on occasion. And early in the week, I did a little bit of Eldon Ring. It was good fun, but I got stuck on Margaret for two hours.

So it's... Mac. it didn't once I decided travel away from that boss after the stream I had a lot of fun just everyone got to join me join me in suffering

good stuff and Peter where are we we are team triple jump you can find us on YouTube and Twitch also Twitter and Facebook where we're doing all sorts of familiar content to you idiot heads

we have Rules Boss over there we have Billy Ray Warrus of course still in existence and worst games ever and so on and so forth. And we cook as well, so that's good. But we were also individually on social media, on Twitter, at that Peter Austin and at Confused underscore dude.

Nice. We most certainly are. Why not leave us a five-star iTunes review or a review slash rating on your platform of choice. It helps something to do with Al Gore's rhythms. Any of your final question before we fuck off? What's a weird food from your country? or region

that has a sort of strange literal meaning you know like grandma's knickers or whatever it is you know I like that this now

tell us what it tell us the English obviously in the comments yes fantastic right we're going to head off now

thank you for listening take care of yourselves and we'll see you soon we will bye bye bye You know,

I'm gonna be the I'm gonna I'm gonna I'm gonna Thank you. Thank you.