Puck Soup - Geologist of Animal Collective

Episode Date: May 26, 2016

Greg and Dave talk puck with Brian Weitz (a.k.a Geologist) of Animal Collective, including his life as a Flyers fan, his hatred of Washington fans and his rebellious 5-year-old son rejecting the former for the latter. Plus, Stanley Cup Final predictions, Sidney Crosby's reputation, Hockey Porn and Cap and Bucky are in love and on the run from Tommy Lee Jones.

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Enter the promo code Soup today and enjoy the show. Now entering nerdist.com Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slapshots and goons We've got sportly commentary To what if you'll commute We also cover movies, TV shows It's and tunes It's your weekly bowl of Hagi and Nancet

I'm Greg Wyshn'ske. I'm Greg Wyshinsky of Yahoo Sports Fuck Daddy blog I'm Dave Lozo, yes again whatever and you're in puck soup should we tell them should we tell them what happened yeah sure so we recorded our usual hour plus podcast of jokes and hockey and stuff and we got done we're in a new studio where we got microphones separate microphones we got a little table we got headphones we got all these wires and we wrapped it up we we said goodbye we we gave our little sign off and then as we're about to leave we listened back and it seems like my microphone

phone wasn't set properly, so it was sort of like this. Hey, I'm Greg Wischinski, a puck daddy. So we have to do it all over again. So here we are doing it all over again. So we're going to capture the magic of our first improv off the cup session again. Yeah, luckily I scripted it out. Dave, boy, what an amazing game six that we had last night. It was pretty amazing. Dave, yes, it certainly was Greg. Greg. Dave, you're wearing a hat backwards yet again. Dave, yes, I know. it's my style. Don't skis on my skis. It sucked, but whatever.

But Brian Waits from Animal Collective is on the show today in a Pro Tools assisted interview that you'll be hearing. This is Mike was all Jack too. And he laughed. And he's awesome. And he's a huge Flyers fan. And we had a really good chat with him about the Flyers, about an Animal Collective unreleased track that uses Doc Embrick's voice.

And also one of my favorite things we've done in the show so far, which is talking to him about his kid who's five years old, and Brian's a huge Flyers fan, and the kid has declared his independence and becoming a Washington Capitals fan. He's rebelling and he's owning him as well. He's in every way possible if five-year-old could dominate a father. He's doing it.

It's like a Michael P. Keaton, Michael P. Keaton, Alex P. Keaton. Alex P. Keaton. Michael P. Keaton's the coach of the lightning. Alex P. Keaton is from family times. Alex B. Keaton family ties, Michael B. Keaton, John Cooper. Gotcha. But, like, it's that rebellious thing where he was, like, the Republican kid and with hippie parents. Right, right, right. Like, he's basically saying, I don't, I don't want your life. I'm not going to be you, dad.

I learned it by watching you, and then I'm going to do the opposite. Wear a suit every day and be in a suit and carry a briefcase and root for clodgeroo. I don't want your life. I got in from Tampa this morning. My heart filled with optimism about doing this podcast day before the crushing disappointment of technical difficulties. But game six was last night. It was one of the weirdest things I've ever seen

where I was so convinced Tampa was going to win that I basically had the story written beforehand about the lessons learned from the previous postseason. and the ass kick in that the Rangers gave them in game six. And they go out and they shit the bed for 40 minutes. And then the penguins force of game seven. As we do the show, by the way, game seven of the east is tomorrow night. Game six in the West is tonight.

Yeah, as we do the show. Right, right, right. So, yeah, at this point, the blues have not been eliminated yet. Right, exactly. Not yet. But what did happen that we know for sure is that Sidney Crosby for at least the hundredth time in this playoff series, changed the narrative on his abilities and his legacy and his standing as captain. With that,

I want to read a segment from a really a sizzling hot take, a molten chocolate cake hot take. The kind of take where is that scene in Volcano when the guy jumps off the train holding the woman who's sick or whatever and like he lands in the lava and then like throws her as his legs melt. That's how hot this take is. And the tagline for Volcano was? It blows. Is that not what it was? That's a better tagline for volcano. No, the tagline for volcano was the coast is toast. And I know this because as part of the,

what I could only assume was Oscar campaign for the film, the filmmakers, whoever the distributor was, but probably universal. It seems like a shitty universal film, sent toasters with the coast. with the coast the coast is toast emblazoned on them to film critics

that was what they did they should have just sent like two loaves of bread that's more useful probably to a film critic who's struggling why don't we see more suddenly see more sorry

why don't we see more this second show is going to be so off of her else why don't we see more movies that are are like competing themes like for example like why isn't there more Dante's Peak

volcano, Armageddon Deep Impact, Wyatt Earp, or whatever, tombstones. I feel like we don't have that anymore. We get DC Marvel. That's kind of rival-ish. No, no, no, but it's not like the same plot, but approached in different ways.

Hmm. You know? Well, here's the thing is that. There's like two versions of the jungle book. There's a John Fabro version that's came out and then Andy Circus has a version coming out. But that's kind of different. I'm talking about like...

There were two Steve P. Fontaine movies. Right, but that's like a sub, that's like a, that's like a, that's like a biopic or like a remake of a, of a, of the same film. Okay. I'm talking about like, here's the plot. It's like a giant, uh, a giant, uh, tidal wave hits a skyscraper and turns it upside down and it's the beside adventure inside of a sky's, it's diehard meets the beside adventure. And the movie's like a movie called the tall building. And it's just like, I already saw a skyscraper. I don't want to go see the tall building.

It's called title Tidal Scriper? No, it's called Wave. So you're saying like,

okay, why is there a Matt Damon movie where he gets stranded on Mars and not like a Leo DiCaprio movie where he gets

stuck on Jupiter? Right, because you're referencing the fact that there was Mission to Mars and then Red Planet. Right.

Like Red Planet was about a murderous robot going after Trinity, I think. Yes. Del Kilmer. And then Mission to Mars

was the heady, Gary Sin East in John Cheedle meet aliens. It was a bad movie. It was a really bad movie. Maybe because the stakes are so high and the money is so big right now that people,

as soon as you hear someone else has beaten you to the punch on something, you're not going to make that movie. It's my only theory on it. I'm trying to think of, because like every goddamn movie is a remake or a prequel or part of like a Super Bowl like thing. So I feel like there's just less opportunity. I think like

if somebody walks into a studio and says, I got an idea for a movie. Lay it on me, bro, people are trapped in a skyscraper. That's just flooded, flooded, flooded, flooded, flooded, because of a tidal wave. And the people are trying to get out and get to the top and the rock will be there with the helicopter. And someone else is like,

got an idea for a movie. What is it? Okay, so Kevin Hart's in the helicopter instead of the rock, and instead of it being a skyscraper, it's a floating city... All right. So, I don't know.

That's a good question. I don't know. That was a phenomenon. Remember there was like an episode of Friends where they were laying in bed and they were like, why aren't you, why aren't you sleeping? It's like, I'm trying to remember which one has deep impact and which one was Armageddon. Like that doesn't happen anyway. That's like a 90s thing. Wave building. No. It's like, no.

Oh, there were two 9-11 movies. There was the Nicholas Cage one and what was the other one? Man of Steel. Oh. Superman did 9-11 Superman's band That was Richard Pryor and Superman 3 Upon hearing that Superman was in fact

Bad Superman's bad This is gonna drive me nuts Because I didn't see World Trade Center You're thinking of Flight 93 United 93 Oh maybe that is not because like World Trade Center I wouldn't watch that for a very long time

And then I finally did And I was like oh that Michael Paine you guys are pretty good actor Yeah, he's a great actor And unfortunately It was It was a serious performance from Nicholas Cage after a series of terrible campy Nicholas Gage performances and it really affected how I felt about it.

Yeah, I don't think I saw that movie until eight years after he came out, but it was good. Sidney Crosby's captaincy has a cost the penguins simply cannot afford to pay was the incredibly verbose headline on the sporting news column by Mike DeCorsi, who of course says a name that would portend that it's a great hockey name, but in fact he's a basketball writer.

And this was the section that I wanted to read to you because it's still one of the greatest sizzlingest hot takes I've ever read. Bob DeFenwick. It is not uncommon in sports for character to be mistaken as leadership. It is apparent Crosby has the respect of his teammates. It is equally clear the penguins do not fear letting down their captain. That is more consequential. Here we go. Whether that fear comes from the implied threat of physicality or simply a respect level that does not.

not permit anything but exceptional effort, championship teams almost invariably have such a player or players in charge. If Crosby is going to be the nominal captain, the Penguins needed to supplement him with that sort of player who could back him up. Basically saying that he wanted Sidney Crosby to be Robert De Niro and the untouchables, walking around the Penguins locker room and then just batting a guy in the head at some point for blowing a defensive assignment. Right, just like putting his stick to Chris Cunits his throat because he hasn't scored in seven games

to get him to score in the eighth one. I mean, I get it. We're always going to have these hot takes. whether it's by Michael de Corsi or Bob DeFenwick or Joe DeZone start, whoever the guy is that they throw out there who hasn't covered the game ever. And even people that cover the game full time. I just, like, no one's ever going to write about how, you know, like Brian Russ scored a big goal in game six.

Yeah. And I always joke about how he gets more golden opportunities that he never finishes than any other player. Like, you need that guy. It's such a team sport. And I get it. You knife Tarasenko, you knife Crosby, because it's easy to do. But if you're going to like knife him,

knife him because he hasn't scored in seven games or whatever, don't knife him because he's not walking around the locker room with a baseball bat and like spike shoulder pads and like getting in guys' faces. You'll never guess what Brian Russ's hockey nickname is. Bri-Bri-Bri? No. Rusty.

Oh, I didn't. Wow. I didn't see that. You know what's amazing? I had that joke queued up. because I thought you'd say Rusty because that's the hockey nickname for everything. It's just adding a wide anybody's name.

And you were going to say Rusty and I was going to come back with the exploding urchin. I was going to say Rustle brand. Bank of Truths. Where are you on Crosby, by the way? I'm sitting on his, oh wait, what? Where are you on Crosby? Like in terms of what?

Do you like him? Do you wish him well? Yeah, I think he's a weird dude and he's funny. I think he's like, I've talked to him one-on-one before. It's weird. Like if you talk to him after a scrum's over, he seems like a totally different person. He's like a regular sort of guy.

Yeah, he kind of drops guard a little bit and becomes like like 20% more human. I think he's still probably the best player in the league. You think he's definitely still the best player in the league. I think he's kind of a secretly odd dude. Yeah, I like him. He's got that child prodigy thing, you know, where like clearly there was the discovery of talent in a very young age and the cultivation of that talent. And because of that, he's not, he never. feels like one of the boys. Right.

You know what I mean? Right. Like, he's always kind of been like the guy. He's like that really smart kid who gets advanced two grades. And he's like the fifth grader in a seventh grade class. Or that kid that has telekinesis. Like Drew Barrymore? It's like Fire Starter. It's really

hard to be friends with the Fire Starter. Right, because like, you know, the Fire Starter wants to hang out with the gang and just be fun. But like at the same time, the Fire Starter can start fire whatever she wants. I just realized that Fire Starter was a prodigy song. And Firestar in some ways was a prodigy. I'm the Firestarter.

Just a fire starter. A weird time. What a great. The 90s. God. I've always liked Sid. People still reference the fact that I once, and many times have said that he was better marketed as a villain than a hero. Like when he was marketed as the golden boy of the league, it was like when the WWE picks somebody of the fans hate to push the title, like Roman Reigns.

It's like we don't care about this. guy and we're going to boo this guy because he's he's being shoved down our throats and i felt like that was sid when he came up it's like oh the next gretzky the golden child the canadian boy it's like come on he just he just stick the guy in the nuts right and he just dove and then whined about not getting the call on the dive right because that was what sid was and and especially in juxtaposition with with ovechkin like ovechkin was the stones and sid was the beet was the beetles and and ovechkin was the rock star and sid was like the the anointed one and it just fit that narrative better but like now it's just the fact I like to see this kid win again like I feel like

he's kind of been through a lot of shit yeah injuries um now all of a sudden there's a whole blame sidney thing going on we're in the past because they fired the coach and they fired the GM and then and then the roster's better and they've traded for kessel now it's like well if they don't win it's it's sid's fault and I don't think that's kind of unfair to him too I don't know I'm not like I'd rather see a vetchkin win because he hasn't you know what I mean like I don't really have any sad feelings for a guy that's already won a cup but And he gets killed every single postseason. It doesn't matter whether he has 16 points in 12 games or 10 points in 12 games.

It's always his fault. So I don't think he cares. I genuinely like, you know how like I remember one time it was the Sharks Red Wings. It's a playoff series. And I think Devin Settiguchi had a hat trick. And they put the Sharks up 30. And Twitter like annihilated Devin Settiguchi. Yeah.

And I remember like it. talking to him about it and he was just like, I don't care what anybody says. I'm not, I'm not worried. I think like Todd McClellan, like kind of convinced him to delete his Twitter account. And he was just like, I don't care. I don't read what you guys write. Like, he was so overly wanting to you to know he doesn't read what anybody writes to the point where you know. He knows everyone what everyone's like, like Sid, I don't get the, I don't get the vibe at all that he cares at all about what anybody says about him. Yeah. So I don't know. I think he's fine. All right, real quick. Since we don't have the benefit of knowing what the cup final is, let's talk about

every matchup that's possible in the cup final. Right, because it starts Monday, today's Thursday. Today's Wednesday, but it's Thursday. But yeah, yeah, yeah. If the penguins face the blues, that means that Brian Elliott's played pretty damn well in the last two games of this series against the sharks. It means that we get a really big ratings bump

from big old hockey towns facing each other in the final. And it means that the penguins have survived a lightning game seven on home ice. All that said, I would pick the penguins in the series, and I would pick them in six. I think it'd be a real rough and tumble series. I think it'd be a fun series. But ultimately, I think if...

I tend to believe if the penguins advance, they'll beat the blues. But, spoiler warning, probably not the sharks. Wait, I thought we were doing... I thought we were going to do our thing again. It took forever, and we can't recreate that. That's another lot. That'd be, like, lost episode time. Oh, man.

See, I was sitting over here, like, trying to come up with some crazy scenarios. Now we're just going to play it straight. All right, fine, we'll do it again. Penguin sharks. Now, as you know, the sharks defeated the blues. And it was an amazing elimination game. Game 7 of that series, that was pushing to the brink. And lo and behold, Joe Thornton, four goals in the first period.

And out comes flopping jumbo Joe. Could not believe that he would take his dick out in the first period. because, like, yeah, it's 4-0 at that point, but the game's not over. So he gets tossed. He gets the five-minute front sportsman like, now he's facing possible suspension to start the Stanley Cup final because he took out his dick because he scored four goals, as he always said he would.

As he's want to do. Wait, which to me makes him a really great example. So here's the thing. Yes. You have the whole dick-out thing. You have the whole potential suspension. Oh, Dan Dick out. Dan Dick out.

Boy, I bet you that guy never heard that joke before. Right, exactly. So to me, like, I think the penguins and sharks, is that we're doing right now? Penguin sharks? Yeah, Penguins and Sharks. I think that's a really even series. But do they suspend Joe Thornton? If they do suspend Joe Thornton, I've had sources tell me that the sharks are on the bench

are going to stand up for their teammate and all take their dicks out during the National Anthem, which is going to cause problems with, you know, America, with people, you know, feeling like they're disrespecting the flag. Like, what happens if they suspend the whole team for going full four-go jumbo on the bench before that? So are they all suspended for games two through seven? So to me, I feel like there's too much in favor of the penguins in this series without Joe Thornton possibly playing the first maybe two or three games. I'll say penguins and six. I very much look forward to the total sharks take their junk out protest because then we can play a rousing round of which one's Pierre McGuire. Well, actually Pierre has to take it out too.

This way it's a 21 gun salute. Oh, I see. Very much like a like a like a like a funeral, some sort. It will be a funeral for the penguins if the, oh wait, I think it was the blues that we're doing first. Oh, they do the sharks anyway. Sharks in six if they play the Penguins. That's fair. That's fair. Okay. Penguins blues in three two plans. Boy, Brian Elliott, ladies and gentlemen, what an effort in games six and seven of propel the blues into the final.

78 saves in two games to set up this. I mean, that's amazing. Yeah. And an amazing moment, too, when Ken Hitchcock and Pete DeBore met in the handshake line. And Hitchcock literally bit his nose like the penguin in Batman returns and blood spurted everywhere. Right. A fountain of blood in the middle of the ice, and Hitchcock just then stomped on his face. It was very sad. You know, I think it's kind of great, though, that he stood up for himself. And, yeah, sure, he's possibly facing a prison sentence because of this because that's assault.

It's not attempted murder because he didn't actually, you know, no weapons. Right. But you can't kill a guy by biting. You can't kill a guy with your teeth. So Kirk Muller, potentially, is the new coach of this team? Is that going to hurt them if Ken Hitchcock can't coach in the Stanley Cup final? Like, how does that affect? especially with, you know, I mean, Matt Murray blowing out his knee in game seven.

Oh, yeah. I mean, the fact that-a-tragie. The fact that Mark Andre Fleury comes in wins that series by making 42 saves across four overtimes. Yes. I don't know. I just don't see how the penguins can lose. No, not with the flower.

Not with flower. No, flower. Flower. I would say penguins blues. I would pick the penguins in six. I'll pick the penguins in six games. Still amazed that moment when they beat the lightning when Phil Kast's. skated over to the Prince of Wales trophy

and began attempting to peel it to see if there was chocolate inside. Again, reaffirming everything written about him in Toronto that he was just a fat mess of a man. He's basically slimer with just unbelievable hockey skills and I don't know how you don't love a guy like that. Lightning and Blues in

3, 2, 1. Boy, I can't believe the Tad Bay Lightning defeated the Pittsburgh Penguins in that game 7. I thought that they were T-O-A-S-T-E-S-T-T-O-A-S-T-T-T-O-A-T-T-O-S-T-T-T-O-E-C toast like the coast in Volcano know. But lo and a whole, they gird their loins, they come back and win. And again, who saw this coming?

Stephen Stamcoast does not start the game. They actually start the game with one fewer skater than they should. We all assumed that Ryan Callahan was actually just taking a long dump. But it turned out he was scratched in favor of Stephen Stamcoast, who came out in the third period. Like Willis Reed, hobbling onto the ice. one rib short of where he was before the season started and scores the game winning goal on quadruple overtime against Matt Murray.

And I mean, I don't know for sure yet because I'm not a doctor, but the fact that he got cut in the third period, the high stick and then lost, I think it was up to two pints of blood because he's just said, you know what, I'm going to risk my life for game seven, stayed on the blood thinners, and then get sliced by the stick. I think Kessel did it.

I think Kessel took a swipe at him. And then after the game's over in the pig pile, Jonathan Durenne takes off his skate because he knows he's going to get scratched in the Stanley Cup final if Stamco's healthy and slices his leg from behind. So what's going to happen now? Well, I'll tell you what's going to happen. I have it on good authority of sources very close to the Camp Bay Lightning.

They've told me that in order to replace the blood that Stephen Stamcois lost, he is actually going to wear Matthias Olin on his back as a blood bag. Like Mad Max was a blood bag in Fury Road. What a lovely day! He's going to have tubes feeding him Matthias Olin's blood. Now, you may be saying to yourself, Dave Lowe, so how is that legal? How can the lightning have an additional skater, even if he's on the back of Stephen Stancoast at all times, is a blood bag. And according to the NHL rule book that I did not read before doing this bit,

a player's skates have to touch the ice in order for him to be too many men on the ice. So as long as Matthias Owen is simply used as a blood bag by Stephen Stamcoast to replace all the blood he lost through that skate slash, and the high stick, he is a legal man. It's called the Master Blaster Rule. As long as you have a player on your shoulders or your back, and he says things like, Me no want to hockey, then it's not an illegal man on the ice.

Just keep going. I want to see how many more movies you can bring into this. And then when John Cooper gave him the metallic spray to put into his mouth, and that gave him, yeah, I mean, it's set up really, really well here. Stephen Stamcoves is going to score the game-winning goal and the Stanley Cup final against the St. Louis Blues. He's going to say, witness me! And then Ken Hitchcock's going to go,

mediocre. Wait, is that what we're doing? Is that Salem is that? I forget where we started on this. But anyways, lightning blues, I'm going to say lightning in seven. They close the deal. The bride's maid.

The bridesmaid becomes the bride, and they win the cup. I agree. I'm going to say lightning. Lightning in seven. They'll find a way. They'll get enough, oh, positive, or negative or whatever it is into Stamco's victory for Tampa Bay. Finally, 3-2-1, Lightning Sharks.

Boy, oh, boy. Joe Thornton, Dick out, Dick Out, Dick Out, Dick, St. Louis. Stephen Stamcoast, Gold, quadruble overtime, blood bag. The blood everywhere. Matthias Olland, but legal master-blaster rule. But here's the thing, though. Yes. The end of the San Jose St. Louis series, we're in the handshake line.

Pete DeBoer gives Ken Hitchcock this gigantic titty twister. Right. Because he's just fed up with all the hitch stuff. It's just the most epic thing ever. It's like spinning the wheel on a bank vault. Right. But here's the thing. What he doesn't realize is that Ken Hitchcock's nerve endings in his chest have died seven years ago.

He doesn't feel a thing. So Hitchcock grabs him and bites his nose off like the penguin in the Batman movie. It was unbelievable. So if Ken Hitchcock can't coach because of that, I don't know what's going to happen in that series. Yeah, it would be a real shame if you couldn't go. But luckily, for the Tambay Lightning, their coach is fine. I mean, there was that incident where his children were chased by a demonic vacuum. There was that moment when the auto plant was taken over by the Japanese.

And there was that really strange moment when he was trapped in a model town until someone said John Cooper, John Cooper three times. And he emerged and said, it's showtime. There's also the problem, too, where he brings Vicki Vail to the locker room. And now Vicki Vail knows all the secrets. Oh, she knows all the secrets. Right. And I thought it was really interesting in game seven when Mike Sullivan was trying to step to him. And all of a sudden he breaks a stick on the board.

She says, you want to get nuts? Come on. Let's get nuts. Get a load of me. But Vicki Vell is a reporter. You can't get Vicki Vell. I kind of inside. And then also, it's very odd sometimes when you're watching John Cooper coach.

And all of a sudden, there's another John Cooper behind him dressed like a bird going, you're not good enough to do this job. You're a shit. Get out of here. You're not good. You're done. But I think that the fact that he died of cancer on the acupuncture table and then came back to life to coach this team is going to give them the real lift they need. Yeah, there was that time when he was tipping back a few too many, but luckily now he's clean and sober.

Yeah. And he is, I got to tell you right now, as far as people that police the game, he is a one good cop. He is a great cop. And honestly, the fact that every game in the Stanley Cup final starts at 8 p.m. Eastern Standard Times, means he is not on the day shift. He is on the night shift. And scene. I say it is going to be,

I think the sharks are going to beat either the penguins or the lightning. I think the sharks get past the blues, they're going to win the cup. So I'm going to say sharks, sharks in six against the lighting. So yeah, I think the east has got this, no matter what.

You're an east mark in this one? I'm an east mark. Wow. Think they're faster. I think the matter who it is. But I mean, it doesn't matter who it is. We know who it is at this point. We're talking about the two teams

that are in the cup final. We know what happens. So yeah, Tampa in. Six. All right. Well, there you go. All right. Brian Waits is our guest today.

He is better known as geologist from Animal Collective. A band. If you're not familiar with the band, do check them out an amazing art rock band. Also, they were called like freaky folk or something like that, too. I don't know. Wikipedia comes up with words. But anyways, Brian's a Flyers fan. He's a dad.

He has some great cool things to say about DC fandom. His kid's great. His kid's awesome. And life on the road, the record industry, Eric Lindros, all sorts of things. So do check this out, and we'll see you on the other side of the interview. Brian Waits of Animal Collective, you're on a train right now. And I got to tell you, it's been a real interesting day for all of us. Yes.

You were fantastic in our 45-minute interview earlier, but now it has lost to time and tech difficulties, sir. Yeah. It's been a day of that for me, too. But the good news is the fact that you confess to that murder, it will not ever be heard by anyone ever because we lost that file. Yeah, the confession of murder is gone. Brian. How mean I was the Caps fans, too. I'll walk around in D.C. safely now.

We're going to hit some greatest hits, and we're going to begin by talking about one of the things that we loved so much, the fact that, and you're not getting out of this one, There's an animal collective track that's never been released that uses an audio sample of Doc Emmerich's voice. Fire! That is true. Yeah, we haven't released it yet. I'm not sure if it'll ever see the later day, but it exists.

How did you use Doc Emmerich's voice in this song? Well, so the song is called, the song's called Golly. I believe my bandmate that wrote it is not a hockey fan. I think it's a soccer goal he's talking about, but the idea is that the goalie is sort of this unloved person who always has your back. And I was looking for a stand. We talked about having a sample in there of a sports announcer,

and I had some sympathy for Michael Layton all these years later. I'm not sure why, but I just do. And, you know, so I decided, having been in the building when he let in the puck Patrick Cain's overtime winner and how departing that moment was, it was the only call that I thought I could get my heart behind the sample

and turn into a sound for the song. So it's there. We'll see. If it ever gets out there, I'll be sure to send it to you guys. It sounds like your band members are torturing you. They're like, hey, what was the hardest moment of your adult life? Let's make a song about it. No, I was, I was fully behind. You know, because I'm not a singer, so it's rare that I get to express heartbreak in our song, you know.

So this is my chance. So are you currently pulling into the Philadelphia train station as we speak? I am currently pulling into Philly. Sorry about that. Was the Patrick King goal and that entire sort of few 30 seconds of uncertainty, was that your lowest point as a Flyers fan? Yeah. no doubt. I mean, the 97 sweep

was pretty bad, and I was at game one of that too, against Detroit. But I mean, just, like, not knowing what happened when Kane scored that goal, because I was at the other end of the ice and in the nose sleeve section. So, you know, when the puck went in, because he could be so fast

as a skater, and he never stopped skating when it went in. You saw all of a sudden, like, he threw up his clubs, you know, the team came off, their team, off the bench. He said no idea what's happening. and the arena clearly did know but was not going to show the fans on the jumbotron or whatever they call it now so yeah we were just there and you had no idea was happening and we back off and we're getting we lost you for a second but we'll piece it together it doesn't matter

I don't know when you lost me um the thing about that that Patrick Kangle and that cup final I gotta be honest with you like we've discussed flyers fans if we're on the show specifically bracelet tossing. But that was the series that made me really like Flyers fans. I don't know if there's been a material change in like the attitude of Flyers fans, but I remember going to that Cup Final and being like, I thought it was just going to be hate-filled bile towards the Blackhawks, but it was more like support for the Flyers than anything else.

Did I just misread Flyers fans all these years? Yeah, I think so. I mean, well, I don't. know. I mean, I remember I was texting with a friend from Chicago on the way out, and he was like, you know, sorry you guys lost, but I'm so psyched. And my response to him was like, why. So now you don't have to, like, pretend like you actually like hockey anymore. You can go back to watching the White Sox. Wow. So I have to, you know, then that's pretty Philly fan of me. I have to own that moment. But later on, I shook some hands with some Blackoff fans. And, you know, I wouldn't

drink with any of them at the hotel bar, but I shook their hand, and I was gracious. Do you hate, who do you hate more? Rangers, Devils, or Penguins fans? It's Devils, because Greg always talks about Eric Lindross being concussed by Scott Stevens, right? I hate the Devils because that rivalry, this isn't

even fun. Like, you know, you can hate the Rangers and the Penguins, but at least those rivalries are fun. Like, I mean, I think it's going to change maybe as the team rebuilt, but the Devils were just never a fun team to play. I mean, the trap was boring all those. years.

Boring. So that was just a number of fun rival. We always lost for the last 15 years. And it wasn't even fun to lose. Whereas with the Penguins, at least we have the privilege of watching the best player in the world. Yeah, I'm getting Malkins really good. We were actually talking about that in the first segment about Sid. Like, as a Flyers fan, what is your opinion of Sidney Crosby?

Do you have love and respect for him? are you the kind of guy that would bring a Sidney Criesby sign to a game with him as a baby? No, no, no, I think it's a privilege to provide him to play hockey, I have to say. Now, listen, you, as we spoke about in the Great Lost interview, you have a five-year-old son, you were trying to raise him the right way to become another Flyers fan, to bleed the type OB, as you called it before. But your son is drifting off and becoming a Washington Capitals fan. How does that make you feel as a father?

I'm hoping it's not permanent. You know, as I told you guys earlier, like, the manner in which he made that choice, I was so, it made me so proud. You know, I mean, just challenged my authority with, like, a degree of, like, logic and, you know, reasoning that I didn't think he had. You know, he asked me why I even liked the flyers if he didn't live. there. And when I said it was where I was born and grew up as a kid, he said, well, it's not where I was born. I was born in Washington, D.C., so I'm going to like the Caps.

I was so proud of his arguing skills that I had nothing to say. So for now, I'm supporting him, and I'm putting all my hope to my daughter. But doesn't it bug you about how Caps fans just, you know, that they show up in the second period of games and don't care? Is that a thing you've ever thought or said during an interview? ever during the course of your life. It is. Hold on, guys. Since I move,

keep plugging my phone, I can't find my ticket and the conductor's staring at me. Oh, no. Put him on with us and we'll vouch for you. Yeah, we'll talk to him for you. Yeah.

Hold on. I might be in trouble here on the train. Dude, fight him. Fight him. You're a Friars fan. This is great. Now not only did we waste this time for 45 minutes in a loss interview,

but now we're getting him thrown off a moving train. He doesn't have to walk home. Yeah. Well, Philly to D.C. I do have my Yahoo Incorporated

your badge. That and a token will get you on the subway. Wait, what's he telling you you can't do? Tell them this is America, buddy. Tell them you're going

to the nation's capital. You have freedoms. Tell him your... He walked away. I think he sent it. All right. I was going to say that's right.

Tell him that Wikipedia describes Animal Collective as a freaky folk band. Yeah, I don't think that's working on this train. The thing you need to tell people that you shared with us, because it really was an amazing revelation, the story of you playing knee hockey with your son

and how he decided that he was going to take a goal away from you. Yeah, well, so I'm going to use the story now to argue against the reviewing the off-sides, which we saw last night in the game with Tampa and Pittsburgh, and I'm super against the rule. And what made me against it the most was my son were trying to teach him some degree of sportsmanship, you know, because he gets really angry when I score on him, and he always tried to find a reason why the goal shouldn't count. Like, he wasn't ready or he was thinking about something else,

or I did something illegal. And the other day I scored in, there was no denying I scored. Like the puck didn't bounce back out of the net. It was in the net. And, you know, I had him, and I was like, you have to give me that goal. and he walked over to my iPad and just stared at the home screen for a few seconds, and then he came back to me. He said, referee says, no, roll.

He even did, like, the arm movement. Like, he waved his arms. And I said, what do you mean? And he said, well, you were off sides. Like, the video said, you were off sides. And I was like, oh, man. That's great. We got to get rid of this.

This is the new, you know, as a lot of you guys that said in the media, it's pretty much the new foot in the crease. and it's going to end badly one of these days and it's going to make a game end badly. What's worse? The goals being reviewed and overturned because of offside or Flyers fans throwing garbage on the ice whenever they get sad? I got no comment. I mean, what happened like two days later?

There was when Lunkwitz got hit in the eye or something and then came back in the game and Penguins fans' food. And I didn't see stories. in the national media. Yeah, that's true. Boone's the same thing as throwing garbage on the ice. Brian, are you worried that your son is going to pick up other caveats in the National Hockey League?

For example, like, if you accidentally, you know, hit him in the head that you might have to leave the house for three days based on the Department of Player's Safety ruling? I mean, he's picked up on goal interference already. I can't be anywhere near him. Oh, man. you know, if we're playing in the living room. That means you might be raising a young Tim Peel.

That's not good. Oh, God. Oh, God. He's going to be getting drunk with you and his... Hey, here's a question. Has your kid been to a hockey game? Yeah, yeah. He's gone to, yeah, three or four.

We've gone to the... You know, when we went to a Flyers game and actually, like, like, through my manager, somebody who works at the arena, like, doing music there, concerts, actually got my son, like, on the bench for the the warm-up, like the pre-game skate, which was pretty special. But, yeah, he's been to, like, three or four, a cop-star, Flyers game. When, I mean, where do you sit for him?

Do you sit upstairs? Because that was always my thing with my kid was, like, when I finally take her to a hockey game, because she's not been, I want to take her to a good game, i.e., like a devil's rivalry game, but I'm not sure where I want to sit with her. You know what I mean? Well, the first game I ever took him to do, he was, like, one and a half, and it was one of the things where I, like, went on Craigslist two hours, before the game to see if there were good seats

that someone was selling for cheap just to make their money back and we actually got box seats and my wife was like and it was just going to be for me and my brother and then my brother bailed and my wife was I was like let's all go and she was like oh yeah there's a private bastard and you know he's still in diapers so it was like oh we got a place to change diapers

but since then we fit with the crowd and and I'm I'm you know we always get decent when we go through a music, like a concert promoter connection. And I've actually, like, especially when the, you know, the flyers have been

so generous, like the live nation people in Philadelphia, he's been so generous, like, we're letting him sit on the bench for pre-game skates that we had this. Like I said to my wife and my brothers, I was like, we can't do this anymore. Like, he can't grow up thinking, like,

this is just what happens when we go to a hockey game. Yeah. You don't just, like, get to sit on the bench for the pre- game skates or like a promoter in D.C., you know, the guy who who works with the 930 club where we play a lot, like he got him in the penalty box

or something and a photograph during the three game skates. And so I think I'm ending that practice. Is this all in D.C.? he's doing this? Or is it's in Philly too? The Philly is they let us on the players bench. In D.C. they let us in the penalty box. See, it's like

a competition for his love. It's like the devil's going to be like, you want, to drop the ceremonial first puck before a game, it'd be a devil's friend. The penguins are going to name him general manager in two years. You know, that's interesting because you made me think that, like, you know, we do have to watch out for kids being spoiled and thinking it's always going to be great all the time, which made me think that there's probably a kid that was around like eight years old in 1975 who literally thought the Flyers would win the cup every season.

Right. Imagine that. Yeah. He's taking shot Yeah, kind of like Mike Gritchers and Jeff Carter He's taking shots Taking shots, exactly We will literally be here all day folks

Hey, when you're on the road with Animal Collective Like, how do you, how do you hockey? Do you search out hockey bars? I know you read Puck Daddy and thank you for that and listen to our silly podcast, and thank you for that too. But are you someone who's trying to always find someone to talk puck with, and are you successful in doing so? I'm not successful.

I mean, like, when we used to tour smaller places like bars in Canada, I would wear a flyer T-shirt to try and start, you know, provoke somebody into a conversation, which rarely works. But, no, I usually just watch the app. You know, I watch hockey in my app. On the last core, actually, we had a night off in Nashville for, I think it was game four between the Predators and the Sharks

and I took one of my bandmates and one of our crew members to the game, the one that went to the triple overtime which, like our sound guy like once it was the end of regulation he was like, what happens now? And it was his first hot, it was both of their

first hockey playoff game. And I said, well, it's not a shootout. It's going to keep going. And I went to the bath and I came back and he was gone. That's my bandmate. It was like, he had enough. He's not watching another period.

And then when they scored in the third period, my bandmate Noah, he plays under Panda Bear. He was so, he was like, I've never seen that many people. Yet that's, like, all at once. Like, it was such an amazing thing to see. And I was like, oh, I'm glad you saw it.

And he was like, I'm also really glad it happened because, like, if it had, if that overtime period it ended, like, we have a show to be smart, man. Like, I was out of here. There was no way. could have gone any later, which sounds, you know, to me, overtime hockey, I think is one of the... It's the best.

Overtime playoff hockey, I think it's one of the greatest things in the world. You know, it's like one of life's greatest joys for me. So I can't sympathize there. I can't understand leaving a game early. You want to make your case again for Eric Lindross in the Hall of Fame? You want to do that one again? I think he's in. I mean, I'm not, you know, the stats, I think, keeps himself.

And we talked for a while earlier. You know, I'm nicer to Lindross now in retrospect, I think, than I was towards the end of his career with the Flyers. I think we're all a little, a little bit more understanding of the head injury thing. Right. You know, I'm not going to go too into his errands or anything. I've never met him. I noticed, you know, I've been to a few Flyers games,

they're staying ducked players into the team Hall of Fame. and they were conspicuously absent from induction ceremony. A lot of players bring their families to those events. They were probably orchestrating a trade to another Hall of Fame. A better Hall of Fame. A better Hall of Fame during the ceremony. Hey, why don't you think the NHL has reached out and tried to get Animal Collective to play at the NHL Awards in Vegas?

That probably speaks for itself. I think if you listen to our music. I don't know how well we go over. I mean, if you told me earlier, hockey players like country music and they like Drake. They do. That's it. I don't think we're at either end of this. But that doesn't mean that they wouldn't like a 12-minute song that would leave them bewildered.

That doesn't mean that that's not part of their makeup as well. Well, you vote on the award, so if you can vote for the entertainment, you know. Dude, if you think I have that kind of sway, we would have never had shock. Kaka Khan at the NHL Awards one year. What's wrong with Shaka Khan? A lot of things wrong, having Shaka Khan at the Hockey Awards. Come on. But what are you going to do?

You have to write the goal song for the Flyers. You have to come up with a new goal song, and then that'll get you in the pipeline of the award shows and player stuff. Yeah, do you think... I know. Do you think you can... Can you convince your bandmates to do, like, your version of Blur's song, too? Just a real sell-out arena rock song?

Just to be, like, a goal song for somebody? Yeah, zero lyrics. I mean, we have plenty of songs where for the first few minutes, there's really no lyrics or anything happening. But they often lack distorted guitars and a real drum kit. You need to get your Gary Glitter on a little bit more, not like in the life sense, but like in the music sense. Rock and roll part three. Hey, one thing, Brian, we didn't cover before, and we talked about it actually in the elevator on the way down, is your love of Calder Runner Up, Shane Gossisvair. yeah i love him yeah he actually got me using emojis on my phone which i resisted for a long time

so you because because of ghost bear you're now an emoji user imagine if his name was like plum hand like you could just tweet the tweet the eggplant hand yeah yeah yeah yeah then be really confusing because they're like are you talking about the flyers defenseman or masturbation yeah or both or both hey you said ron

Next all is your favorite flyer. Who's number two? Who's number two favorite flyer of all time? Somebody I saw a play. No, it could be anybody. Anyone you want? Bobby Clark? Then I'll go Bernie.

Oh, Bernie Perron. Oh, yeah. Oh, that's right, because you play goal. So you've got the affinity for both of those guys. I play goal in street hockey. I didn't play goal on ice hockey because the equipment was too expensive. I got like the lecture of like, like, if you're going to be a goalie and we're going to spend all this money on the

goalie equipment, like you've, you have to play goalie and you can't decide afterwards that you don't want it. Yeah. I play it at left wing, but I always wanted to be the goalie. Well, let me ask you a follow-up question then. That's probably a lot more interesting to people out there. Who's your least favorite Flyers goalie of all time? And is it Roman Chichmanic?

No, because he was fun. I like how Flyers fans have set the bar so low that as long as the guy's fun. He's fun, you know? that's enough yeah exactly no I uh card snow

yeah I mean it'd be someone from that like 90s oh man's land I'd say yeah um I didn't

you know like Sean Burke when he played on the flyers like didn't do anything for me um just like wasn't you know at least check Monica gave you this like

he inspired a little bit but yeah he had moments where you were like you know he had that like

gosh it weird his play. Yeah. That, uh, you just kind of hope you were like, well, hopefully next month, you know, they'll play really well. Yeah. Whereas some of those other guys, you know, they were so uninspiring that, uh, and not to put that, you know, Sean Burke was, good goalie, but when he played for us, you know,

we, it was just that era where we were get goalies, like, past their prime or something, like when we had, uh, Phampes for us. Yeah. Yeah, you just never, you never felt like anything was going to happen. Nidamaki. Nidamaki. We have hopes for him for a while. Yeah.

He was always one of my favorite goals because he was always a guy that could push the starter but never really be good enough to win the job. And I think that's a valuable asset to have. I think we have that now. I mean, Noever might be able to challenge for the job, but I mean, you know, the injury crone five

kind of follows him around a little too much. So I think he's pushing. Now, you know, he's a good pusher. Well, listen, Brian, you're our favorite person in the world for doing this because it was our Titanic screw up that ruined the interview that you did when you were here. Right. So I guess my last question is, what was your favorite part of the interview that no one will ever be able to hear? Well, I don't know. Maybe talking about the cap fans.

I'm kind of that or when we all compare at the inside. Yeah. Yeah, your rant on the Caps fans was one of our favorite things, too, I think. We have to find the way to save that. What, to incriminate him in his hometown, his community? Like, when he's playing in D.C. somewhere, like, the night of we'll just, like, pump it out somewhere on Twitter. We just play D.C., so I'm safe. I mean, and the comment I made about the Caps fans, I mean, I can say it.

You know, I just, when the team got really, part of it was I was just, I resented the ticket prices going up. When the team got really good and exciting with all those young guys, like a bench game. and Semin and Baxter and Green. You used to be able to go to games for really cheap if your team was playing in town, and half the arena would be your fellow fans from the other city. And then I all just went away, and you would look around at these people just thinking, and again, if it was in, like, 2005, you know, thinking, like, these people just don't deserve this team, because they don't understand, like, what they have and how exciting it is.

But they've been a decent fan base for the last decade. They've filled the place. It's a good atmosphere in there now. And it's interesting because you are that fan in D.C. that I think is the majority of fans in D.C., which is you are the guy who lives there but roots for another team. But despite that, are you a guy who roots for the Flyers but kind of has an affinity for the Capitals and would like to see them excel, or does your Flyer fandom mean that you want the Capitals to be a crushing disappointment every year?

I tell my son the first thing but I really feel the second I feel you Brian a.k.a. geologist aka. The guy who saved our podcast this week, you're a gentleman and a scholar we're very happy you weren't thrown off the train and had the

conductor pick up the phone and say no ticket that would have been embarrassing Oh man, yeah, we lost the geologist story, too. We lost a lot, Dave, but we didn't lose this interview with Brian. Thank you so much, dude. And we'll definitely do this again in person when you come back from Europe. Geologists, you definitely rock. Oh, Jesus.

Get it? All right, dude. Thank you, ma'am. All right, we're good? Yes, we are. Thanks a lot, bud. You're the best. All right.

Take care. Bye. All right, bye. Dave Lozo, it's been a, it's been a, it's, been a podcast. As you just heard, the podcast that we did with Brian Waits of Animal Collective,

aka geologist, he's geologist, the band isn't. It was just a Titanic fuck up. We did 45 minutes with Brian and the recording was jacked up. It's the first day in the new podcasting studio. It was a whole situation where

his mic wasn't on and Brian was cool enough to join us on the train back to D.C. after training up to just do this stupid podcast. Right. We could not have inconvenience to more if we tried.

He's MVP, man. Support Animal Collective. They're a great band and we're definitely going to have them back. They're hitting a

European tour next month but we'll have them back. Oh, we lost the story about the Golden Girl's song. When you go to Animal Collective, go to Spotify,

download it, whatever, there's a song that incorporates a clip from the fantastic TV show Golden Girls. It's the best. Yeah, indeed.

We have two segments we got to do in the remaining time on this gigantic cock-up of a show. They're both favorites for the people, hockey porn, and of course the news, the letters segment that we do, listen or mail, if you will, as we press on with this silly podcast. Some of the things that are sent in, I'll say this.

If you're somebody who wants to send us the fuck Mary kill, Yeah, I know. Someone sent it in for Latvian players. And it was Arturus Urbe, Zegmas Gorgensen's, and Kirstis... Gilles Liglis... First of all, pick three names that I can pronounce. You've hit two of three. Thirdly, or secondly, the answer, obviously, is I would kill Kistur's Gla-Glaugloskhafars,

because I can't pronounce his name. I would marry Oh geez I don't want to do anything to any of those guys I don't have any thoughts or feelings About these three lot being guys It should be like you know Donald Trump Hillary Clinton

And then like Bill Cosby I guess I would marry Artress Irbe Because he's sort of an overachiever But I wouldn't I mean I wouldn't marry as I'm Gus Gergens Because I feel like it'd be outstanding at first And then completely go off the rails afterwards Wow I don't even know where to

I don't even know how I would base my fucking marrying killing of these three people. Like, am I basing it on? I don't really know their personalities. They're both. They're all three okay hockey players. Khruster hasn't really had a chance yet. But since I have to do this,

fuck Zemgus, marry Arters, and I kill the other guy. You kill the other guy because his name is too tricky. I'm not even convinced that Mike D. who sent us this question, uh, you spelled the name right. It doesn't look right. But I know who it is.

I know who he's talking about. Right. The super duper tall lightning. Yeah, like a goalie who plays for the national team. He was playing court hold last year. Remember last year when we were hanging out, the Stanley Cup final, the Tiki bar outside of the arena? That's right.

He was the tall guy who, I think somebody up to him and just said, like, hey, how's it going? And he was just like, whatever, bro. He's like, leave me alone. I'm the third. You know, I was at that Tiki bar last night until about four in the morning. I really wish I was back there right now. I really wish all of this never happened today. How early are you going to fall asleep tonight?

And how many consecutive hours of sleep are you going to get? I'm not because I have to fly out at seven tomorrow. game seven. Oh, you should just change the flight to tonight and just like get there and sleep there because you're, you're going to be, you're going to be so miserable to get up at four or five in the morning. I need to be with the ones I love tonight after the giant mess up of this podcast. I just, I just need comfort. I need someone to comfort me. By the ones you love, do you mean like two beers and some ribs? My fiance and my dog. Oh, yeah. And beers too. All right. This is a segment we like to call hockey porn. It's a segment in which we talk about how certain national broadcasters occasionally

dabble in language that could be double entendre or slightly pornographic or just absolute porno stuff that they're just trying to slip by us because we can't do

anything about it. And when he says national broadcasters, he means national broadcaster, Pierre McGuire. My Pavlovian response to Pierre McGuire's voice

has gotten to the point where now when I hear it, and this could be, this will be seconded by Ruby, when I hear his voice sometimes and he's giving like analysis,

sometimes I'll just out of nowhere, just go, but-da-da-da-da-p-p-p-b-b-b-b-b. It's like a Morse code of Pierre voice. I live for the moments when he does a highlight, and he's like, oh, Connor Shiery across the blue line, Gray pass really sets up the goal, right, Eddie? The no-sell.

Just silence. I love that silence. Pierre-Miguire hockey porn. What do you have for us this week? We got two entries. The first one's, it's like a six. It's like a six out of ten, maybe like a 5.5 out of 10,

but it's a good little appetizer to the main course. Here's our boy, Pierre Maguire, Pittsburgh, Tampa Bay, Game 6. Like coming from behind, you know, you hear that a lot in a lot of sports. It's more of the fact that it's going through him. And there's some coming from behind. But that one happened, oh, hold on, I'm getting ahead of it. Vine's part of the control here. So that happened about a minute after the 10 out of 10 porniest.

This is the one where, this is the. first time when he said this that I'm somewhat convinced that Pierre is trolling us, he's cognizant of hockey porn, and now he's just going to just repeat the word come and coming as many times in a sentence as he can to goose the hashtag. Yes, because he's just, if you just say he's coming, they're coming, you can kind of get away with it. He's going to start stretching it to be like, oh, Hyland was coming on his back, and then, you know what I mean? Like, for a hit from behind. Like he'll just,

oh, he came right inside of him there and like, oh, yeah. But here it is. Here's the beauty one from last night, or from game six. That's,

he was coming. And then he was coming. And he was coming. That's the part that gets me to it. Because if someone's, if someone's like yelling, I'm coming, I'm coming.

Like, that's funny on its own. And then to just, you know, clear up any sort of confusion. I like that. It sounds like it's from like a, like a,

like an audio book version. of a porn. Like, it's, yeah, right. Like, he's just like, you know. Like the narrator says, I'm coming, I'm coming. And then it's like brackets. And he came.

And he came. Pierre, you perverted man, you. So much coming. All right. This is a segment we like to call a listener, male. That's a pretty good name for it.

What the fuck we call it? We're an hour six of the podcast now. So give us a little, give us a little, It's like the fifth podcast we've done today, but the first one you're actually hearing. Right. Yeah, it's great. This is from John. John wants to know, should the NHL change the Victor had been play,

length of ice, delay of game rules. So it's like, just like icing, but you can't change skaters. And this is something that happened in Game 6 of the Lightning Penguins game series, where Victor had been shot the puck down ice on the penalty kill with Anton Straum in the box. The puck went all the way over the glass at the other end of the ice, and he was given a delay of game penalty, because obviously what you want to do on the PK is stop the clock and earn yourself a penalty. It's a nonsensical part of the rule.

I've seen it happen twice now. I once saw Matt Cook shoot the puck over the other side of the rink with his back to the wall. Against the caps, right? He was with the caps at that point. No, no, no, no. It was against the caps. Oh, was it against the guy? I remember, I remember picturing Ovechkin, like, screaming and pointing because that's what the guys do.

And it's just a stupid part of the rule. Like, it's very, very easy for them to amend the rule and have it be a situation where if you clear the puck over the glass without it being touched in your own zone or in the neutral zone, it's the lay of game. If it happens to be some herky, if there's some Swedish Thor that shoots the puck all the way down the ice over the glass in the attacking zone, then it's not the lay of game. it's just an icing call or something along those lines. You should be rewarded for getting the puck over the glass from that far away. Patrick O'Sullivan said to me last time on Twitter, he's like half the league can't do that. Right.

Yeah, it's pretty great. Like, guys can't lift the puck from 20 feet away and hit under the crossbar. Never mind go over the glass from 150 feet away. Like here's the thing. There should be a bullseye and it should be worth 50 goals. Right. Like when you had a home run in the minor leagues, you have the bullseye and get the free steak.

Oh, I was thinking more like hitting the top basket and rock and jock. It's just, God, this is such a tiring thing to talk about for the third. time today. I fucking hate this rule so much. It's just like we were talking in the in the lost podcast about how it's the only rule in hockey where there's, it's just black and white. There's no judgment. There's no gray area. But if you wanted to make it that way where, okay, you see the Victor Headman one, you know it's not what he's trying to do. So you don't penalize him. Great, great, great, great. But like the Nick Benino one where he smacks it over the glass where the puck's over his head. Again, that's obviously by accident. But.

it might not be in certain situations when a guy does the same exact thing. He might need a breather. It's like sometimes guys will wave at the puck over their head when they're backing up on defense and they're not trying to knock it out of play. They're just trying to hit it illegally. So if you're trying to hit it illegally, maybe you should be, I don't know. I just think you should get, I like the guy who emailed us and tweeted us and said that we should just make it in like an icing where you can't change.

And then this way you're stuck on the ice, you're out of breath. Hannah RTW wants to know. And by the way, her Twitter handle is Sly Little Goblin. Sly? Does that seem redundant? I was just going to say, Goblin Sly, right? I mean, that would be like secret spy, 42. Like, if you're a spy, of course you're secretly a spy.

Come on. Stealth Ninja. Hannah's really glad that she tweeted us now that we're making fun of her Twitter handle. What else? What else? Hannah, what about your sisters? I'm so tired. Have you ever been to Montana?

What's your thoughts on social media account for teams and players? Who's got the best and worst? Well, the best is the Kings still, I think. The Kings and the Blue Jackets are my two favorite social media accounts for teams. For players? I don't know, man. The thing about players in social media, I still think we're at a point where it's way over-managed.

There's still way too many instances of guys saying something. They're being blowback and them having to open. apologize, we delete tweets, we still get the occasional, I was hacked when I wrote that all women in Calgary are heifers or something, you know, it's like these Twitter hackers have this weird plan

that just sort of like have people fall for fake woge counts and then tweet offensive things that aren't really from them. But as far as like social media accounts for teams players, I like the trend of NHL teams being snarky with each other. And that can kind of get a little bit forced.

Like I think Montreal was doing it with somebody where it's like period in front of the team name and then it's like a gif and then they reply with a gif and they reply and it's just oh it's so cutesy it's like it's like forced cutciness you know like oh yeah i don't know like i don't really follow any of the team accounts like the kings are funny dallas stars are pretty good too i always see that tony romo zinger from when the dallas cowboys were like who cares about hockey season and of course every hockey fan has to fight back that but dallas was good with the madano thing players um um um I like when David Peron gives you shit whenever you minimize his concussion.

He did. I was, oh, I'm not going to recover. That's still my favorite thing. I've been so good on Twitter in mic dropping and finishing moving people and you had to bring up the fucking Perron thing. The pick. Oh, he said a pick on me, huh? And he just wouldn't, he was like a dog, just, just gripped, just sunk his teeth and he wasn't going to let you go. I didn't mean it was a pick.

I meant, no, no, you said pick. But like, in terms of like, I follow Michael. Alada. He's, he's, he's, he's, he's kind of funny. Like, there's just, right, they're, they're, they're too, they're too polished. They're too worried about saying stuff. There has to be somebody. I feel like there's a player I follow who's, who's decent. There has to be. I follow, like, Dustin Penner's all right when he's not being a creep. Yeah. Well, here's the thing is like, there was a story, ESPN, I don't know, someone did it about how, like, all these athletes, I'm Dave Lozo. Can't remember if it's ESPN. But it was about how, like, all these athletes just, he's, you. social media and tend there just to get late all the time. Right. Like, it's fine. True. I mean, dude, if you're a 22-year-old athlete and you had a Twitter following and it was like

1.2 million followers and like 5% of them were gorgeous women that wanted to have sex with you, what else would you use social media for? Interact with me? No. No. Crazy. Why would you? But I don't know.

I don't really have a favorite. I feel like I'm forgetting a player. I haven't eaten all day. I'm so hungry right now that. Kyle Milnammo. Call Malamo writes in, who is worse? The person who complains about spoilers or the person who spoils things right away. Oh, the fucking complainers, man.

Oh, I disagree. Oh, hot take. I think it's the people who spoil things without any regard for the people that are being spoiled. It depends. Because as someone who watches Game of Thrones and tweets jokes during it, there was two episodes ago. There was, oh, the John Snow episode where, like, everyone was tweeting, like, the little screenshot of him, like, with his eyes open. So that means he's alive. that's a spoiler okay you want to get mad about that that's fine right but then two episodes later

danny um like burned down the whole dothraki you know infrastructure and killed all the guys and it was a picture of her like she got naked because like that's what happens right burns are closed and she's standing in front of flames and all that's all it's a picture of that and some guy this guy replies to me on twitter he's like another spoiler bro like what did i spoil that danny's standing in front of fire well you can tell what happened in that scene just by seeing that i'm like okay so if you have you, if you haven't seen it, tell me what happened. That if you can guess what happened, I'll apologize. He's like, well, actually, I saw the episode, so it's different.

I'm like, well, I'm not spoiling anything for you. It's the word. He's like, well, I'm just a man of the people. That's, that's the answer. It's that guy. It's not the spoiler. It's not the spoiled. It's the fucking spoiler police.

The spoiler advocate. The guy he wants to speak on behalf of people that may have had it spoiled for that. Nice spoiler, dude. What? You didn't see Star Wars of Force Awakens in the first five months of being released? I'm just saying that maybe people didn't. And again, you don't have to be on Twitter between 9 and 10 Eastern Time. You can just...

That's true. If it's part of your job, sure. The thing I go back and forth on, though, is that I love the shared viewing experience of social media, and I wouldn't want that to go away. But there's no question that once that happens, then everybody thinks it's fair game to just... Like, for example, like, if it wasn't for the shared viewing on social media, like, Mashable is not doing the Game of Thrones did blah, blah, and the reaction. from fans was blah blah. Like there would be no fucking way to do that story. And that's why, that's where spoilers get amplified is when people react to the thing.

And then the media like BuzzFeed or whoever writes the story about that reaction. They'll put spoiler in the headline, but it's still out there. But like I don't. So like we do this thing on Wednesday. It airs Thursday. And we talked about John Snow being alive that week. And somebody was like really mad about it. And I was like, okay.

So Captain America's Civil War has been out for three weeks. We've talked about it on the show. Right. Haven't revealed anything about it. Because I think for movies, it's different. Yeah. But like for a TV show, fucking Mr. Robot. Oh, yeah.

The fucking guy got mad. Months after it. Three months after the season finale had ended, I mentioned, spoiler alert, Christian Slater's dead the whole time. That would be like me talking about a fight club and being like, yeah, Brad Pitt's dead the whole time. He's not dead the whole time. He's not real. He's a figment of the imagination with the narrator. I mean, he might be dead.

But, like, getting mad about that, that's. insane. Like, getting mad because dead spent a day after the Civil War movie came out, they had that story with a headline in it that I won't even say here that kind of spoils a part of the movie. But I just, I feel like if you don't need to be on Twitter between nine and, like, last week, I tried to use the hashtag Game of Thrones in every Game of Thrones tweet because people were like, that will filter it.

I'm like, great. And still, somebody got mad about some other thing. Just as always, log off. I wish I did it more. We'd all be happier. We would be. What other questions we got here? Well, I will ask you this one.

When will Bran go back in time and shove Searcy? Circe. Searcy. Out of the window. Here's the problem with the time-traveling brand situation is based on what happened with Hodor, Hodor was always going to be Hodor and always have to hold the door because of of the time loop. So like if Brand goes back in time,

whatever he does in that moment when he's warged back into time, it's already happened. He can't change anything based on the rules they've already set up here with Hodor. So he can go back and push Sertia out of window, but he can't because that hasn't happened.

You know what I mean? Like if he wants to go back in time, like I read the theory today about how he's the voice in the fire when Varis gets his junk cut off and thrown into the, you know what I'm talking about. Right, yeah.

And like there's a potential theory too where he's the Lord of Lodd light and he's the voice that people always hear when he's traveled back in time. So if that's the case, then he's already created the Lord of Light. He's already created Melisandry. He's already, you know, barrises, weaners in the fire. So I feel like the time travel thing

is not that great for Game of Thrones. What if he goes back in time and instead of shoving Ceresia out the window, he decides to close the window. Close the window. Clow window. Clodo. Clodo.

Clodo. I made a Mark Andre Flurry joke in my thing I wrote for Vice where I was just like, he's going to travel back in time and he's going to try and stop that Kutcherov goal that tied it, and he's just going to be like, backdoor, back door, back door, Bodor, Raddor. Game of Thrones. You got to get on.

I know. You should travel back in time and watch the first six seasons. I know. All right. Finally, a question about the San Jose Sharks. who does Pavelsky pass the cup to if they win

there are two former captains on that roster all three should accept the cup from Gary that's an interesting thought and the other interesting thing too is that if the lightning win the cup would Stamco's receive the cup from Gary would he come out in civvies to receive the cup

from Gary? Didn't we do this Joe Thornt question or the Stark's question? No I don't think we did that one before. I feel like this is familiar Maybe we're trapped in a brand time loop right now. Oh, and boy, you know, at least we'll be regular, all that brand. I would pass, it goes to Jumbo. Yeah, it goes from Joe to Joe to Joe to Patty to Bernsey. Although, Patrick Marlowe's been there forever.

Yeah. Joe hasn't. Maybe Patrick Marlowe gets the cup first, actually. Have we decided it's Marlowe, like Merlo? Patrick Marlowe. Patrick Marlowe. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know.

Okay, so Stamcox gets the cup, gives it to, boy, who would he give it to on that team? Who's the oldest? Yeah, they don't have Brendan Morrow anymore, so he's not going to. Oh, he'd give it to Hedman. No. Sure. Yeah. One captain to the next captain.

Right? How old? No, Matt Carl's not really that old. So he'd give it to Hedman. Braden Coburn. Joe to Joe. Backus to... Backus to...

Elliot? I feel like the goalie never gets it. No, the bully never gets it second. Backus to upshall because his town burned down. Oh, right. Yeah, that would probably be the way to go. Yeah. And then if...

Who are missing? Oh, the Penguins win. Sid will actually hand the cup to himself. He'll throw it in the air. He'll just walk away. You'll just walk away. Just skate away. It'll sprint away like it's a handshake line after losing the final.

That's a thing, though. Like, I noticed that before the playoffs started, like, there's no, there's not a lot of old dudes that haven't won the cup. Like, there's Marlowe and Thornton, but, like, Matt Cullen's one. Like, he's old, but he's won the cup. Yeah. There's a couple other ones, too, that I remember noticing it. So it's like, there's not really that, like, Dave Andrewchuk story where you want to give the 40-year-old guy who hasn't won the cup in 20 years, but that's Patrick Marlow, essentially. He's been there for, what, 17 years?

He's been there for a lot. He's old. Like, I kind of, because he's still so fast and good, you kind of forget, like, he is. He's basically the old dude. I think he gets it before Joe Thornton. Sid hands it to Dionne Funuff, who then hands it to Castle. Sid hands it to Michael DeCorsi of the sporting news. It cracks me up for his head like a steel chair.

And then just like carries his lifeless body the way Bain carried Batman's body. And then drops him in a pit somewhere and says, you will watch your sporting newsburn. Then I give you permission to delete your account. lovely, lovely carcass. Oh, we've been doing this for so long today. Yeah, let's end the show. Oh, my God. Thanks for sticking with us.

Yeah, I mean, you don't want to talk about Kat being a hydra agent again, do you? Cat being what? A hydra agent. Oh, oh, Cap. I do want to argue for the idea that him and Bucky should get it on because... You're shipping them.

I don't want to use that phrase, to be honest. What if it meant enclosing them in a giant box and then putting them on a boat like literally shipping them? So like it would be like a tighter more erotic Titanic?

Yes. Is what you're saying? A tighter more erotic titanic which would of course be tight titanic. What? I was just thinking about

what Bucky could do with that mechanical arm, you know? Whoa. He's probably got some, he's probably got some moves. I know. Yeah, there was a story

there was a story out today about how potentially that Captain America has been a hydra sleeper agent forever. And I think that just confirms everything that happens in Civil War where he is a gigantic, awful, terrible, murderous, treetorous piece of shit. Again, it's like, it's so amazing to me that this matters now. Like, because before Chris Evans stopped being the human torch and started being polite, the real world,

started being capped. The Marvel world. No one gave a shit about that character. Right. Before the Marvel Cinematic Universe, If I said, Captain America, you'd say, oh, the guy who flicked off Hitler once on that comic book cover or whatever the hell he did. Whatever he did. Yeah, I've no idea.

But no one would even give a shit. They would be like, oh, wow, he was a hydra agent. That's awesome. No one gives a shit about Captain America. But now it's like, it's literally like, like, you know, saying Mother Teresa was a meth dealer. Like she was. Well, she was. Her mother was her street name.

That's how they all knew her. She wasn't like a religious person at all. Oh, hello, child. I'm sorry, I don't have anything if I was a week. A mother's not happy. She cracks them over the head with a crutch. You're like, girl, girl, I need some of mother's milk. You know what I'm saying?

You know what I'm saying? It's a code, right? Right, come on, come on. I'm fienden. You know who you're talking to? You're talking to Mother Teresa. But, like, is that thing, is that, like, a potential thing that may happen? Or is that just, like, a fan-fick thing?

No, that's the, like the new thing is that he's been revealed to be a villain the entire time. No, no, I mean him and him and old Sebastian Stan. Yeah. Well, no, that's me. No, the people moved off the shipping of John Boyega and, and, um. Who's John Boe again? He was Po. I'm sorry, he's Finn.

And, uh, and, oh, that's a Star Wars thing. Yeah. So Oscar Isaac and John Boeaga were going to be shipped in Star Wars world. And then now we've moved on to Bucky and Cap being shipped because brothers, brothers can't be brothers. They have to be lovers. It makes sense because like Captain America, he's, he's a repulsive, like, like loner and like the only person who could possibly love him is the person who knew him before he became the horrible monster that he is and in a way bucky has also become a monster because of what

happened to him and you know the whole russia becoming assassinate things so i think they're kind of star and like star cross lovers right and who the hell else wants to listen to the fucking steve rogers tell his shitty brooklyn stories every fucking five minutes except for a guy from brooklyn this makes complete sense like they're they're gonna get a little tiny apartment in bushwick sleep late you know this reminds me of Duke Snyder. Meanwhile, over the, you know, you see a thought balloon above Bucky's head. It's just kill, kill, kill, murder, murder, kill.

No, it's going to be the opposite because they're the only two people that love telling Brooklyn stories. Like, you know how, like, Rangers games, it's like, hey, Tom Hanks is here. Like, they're going to be dudes at the All the Islander games together, sitting together, all the Nets games together. It's going to be adorable. These two murdering, murdering psychopaths are going to find love with each other. I am off for it. I would love nothing more than for them to share. a luxury box together at like an

islander's game and whatever Russian song triggers Bucky comes on and they just murder everybody in the luxury box section they're like constantly like laying in bed together and you're just like what should we get for dinner tonight? How about that farm to table Italian

place? We always always get that. You love the idea like Brooklyn hipsters but like he's so like Steve Rogers is a man out of time so he literally is a hipster because all of the old things they adopt he is. Like they're laying in bed watching the hot dog eating contest

and he's like, I remember when they didn't do that when they first built, Coney Island. And Bucky's like, shut the fuck up already about it. And he puts on a final record. Where's his fedora? They both grow beards. They both grow beards. I'm all for it. That would be that. Organic coffee. That would be

the most awesome thing where they're just like, oh my God, did you read this? Like what? The Masked brothers were full of shit. No. Yes. We've been paying $9 a chocolate. bar for nothing. $9. Chocolate bar.

Revenant. Edsel. And then Bucky just murders everybody making artisan chocolate in Brooklyn. Dude, we are giving away the free plot to the next Captain American movie. I would watch this. This would be the most,

it would be like the greatest love story slash, and then, okay, so there are fugitives. We bring in Tommy Lee Jones back from the dead to play his role from the fugitive. I want every organic coffee, farm, a table restaurant, vinci's clothing store, vinyl record store, outhouse, dog house, shit house, and this town search until you find me, Dr. Stephen Rogers. He comes out of like the part where they fight at the end of Civil War and like he's like, oh, Captain Rogers is dead.

And like he holds up, he holds up like a part of his costume or something. And he's like, really? The dead men throw their shields? I'm taking over his investigation. It's like some dumb local Siberian cop. I didn't kill Steve Rogers. I don't care. I did kill Iron Man's mom.

All right, I kind of care about that. Oh, you give away from me. What, what's wrong with that? That's the one thing I did. We weren't going to spoil. Oh, but no one knew I was doing a Bucky impression. Oh, shit, there it is. I feel like I'm high right now.

So right now, during the course of this, it's 530. I've been up for like eight hours. All I've had is a coffee. So I figured I would get lunch as soon as we were done. Well, luckily for us, I felt like we're about to end the show. And then, of course, we had to go into a prolonged budget of Bucky and Steve rift. I'm telling you. Captain America.

Captain America, Brooklyn hipster. Oh, my God. Poland, Brooklyn hipster. Oh, dude, that would be like the biggest selling Marvel movie ever. Because it's got romance. It's inclusive for all people. And we bring back Tommy Lee Jones for fugitive fans. And we incorporate all the great things we love about Brooklyn.

So is Tommy Lee Jones and the U.S. Marshals is Joey Pants helping to track down Steve Rogers and Bucky, the whole crew? The climactic scene takes place on the L train. Oh, brilliant. Like Tommy Lee Jones is kind of, you know, chasing after him and the thing. Wait, who, oh. The one-armed man is Bucky. Bucky's the one-arm man. Oh, my God.

We bring it all together. And the cop's like, the cop just yells out, Bucky! And then he shoots the cop and then, oh, man. Oh, we did it. We just wrote a movie here. Marvel, call us. Hey, aren't you, Captain America? Part time.

Harrison Ford callbacks. All right. Loz is about to pass out. Thanks for listening to this really challenging episode of Puck Soup. I'm Greg Wysinski of Yahoo. the Merrick Burshrinsky podcast. You can find me on Twitter at Wersinski. And, of course, my book is take your eye off the puck available now on Amazon.

And Dave Lozo, a tearful Dave Lozo, will now take it home. Yeah, I don't really have anything to say at the end of this show. I don't know. Hey, whatever. Say goodbye to the people, Dave. Goodbye, everybody. Thanks for listening.