Puck Soup - NHL vs. NBA Playoffs

Episode Date: June 15, 2017

Greg and Dave put a bow around the Stanley Cup Final, debate the merits of Sidney Crosby as MVP, offer their top 10 favorite things from the 2017 playoffs, dive deep into the NBA vs. the NHL and super teams, reveal a secret about DIE HARD, re-rank that stupid French Fry ranking, create a Sir-Mix-A-Lot tribute to catfish, discuss Dan Girardi's buyout, preview the Golden Knight's expansion draft and read your listener mail from waffle sex to NHL coaches as Uber drivers. Sponsored by Seat Geek.

Now entering nerdist.com. Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slapshots and goons. We've got sportly commentary to what if you'll commute. We also cover movies, TV shows, it's and tools. It's your weekly bowl of hockey and nonsense. I'm Greg Wyshinsky with Yahoo Sports Puck Daddy blog. A now a member of Oath, colon. You done? Yes.

I thought there was more. I thought you had a bit. No, no, no. That's our new, our new logo as a Verizon company is oath colon. Oh, oath colon. Yeah, like, you know how Yahoo had an exclamation point after Yahoo? Oath is oath. Oh, the punctuation. I thought it was like a human colon. Yes.

I was like, whoa, that's pretty. Not a giant shit-filled organ. A colon like as in punctuation. So oath colon is the new, the new shit. Oth colon blow. Who are you? I'm Dave. and I'm not part of oath, colon.

And, oh, I swear to God, I did not know Sidney Crosby's favorite band was ex-ambassadors last week. I didn't, I just picked the generic band from the NHL Awards out the top of my head. And it turns out he fucking loves ex-ambassadors. Yeah, and you're in Puck Soup. It's a possible that he was the reason ex-ambassadors played, which then starts to beg the question, what exactly can't, like, if he decided and said, you know, My favorite colors are puse and like stripes. And I would like the NHL Shield to be that now.

Like, would they let them? Oh, they would already be like painting it over before he got to the end of the sentence. Gary Betman would be doing himself on the 15th floor of the NHL offices. You know, listen, I don't really like ask a lot of favors of you guys. But my friend Patrick Cornquist wants to wear a sleeveless jersey to show off his guns. Can he do that? I was thinking that, you know, maybe, and this is just an idea, I'm just throwing. it out there. Let's let's let Mark Andre Fleury stay on the team for another five years.

What do you say? By the way, I have a confession to make. I don't often like to share embarrassing stories of my time as a journalist. I like you all to believe that I am constantly flawless. As anyone who's read my writing, you know that I never miss any words and spell everything completely correctly at all times. I was on the ice after game six. Oh, tell me you fell. No, I didn't fall. Because that would have been gift. Oh, yeah. Look at that fat guy.

Whoa, no, he's sliding. His gravity is pulling him towards the Zamboni door. He can't get up. Fat guy. Tell me what your boss is. Or you're going to die. In five minutes. Fat guy falls on ice, slides into cup.

Would be the YouTube title. And it would be great. No, I was trying to get Hornquist because I don't know if you saw, but he scored the most important goal of the series. And so he does. A few minutes of a very, very brief interview with some of us about the goal and how it feels and yada, yada, yada. And he didn't really get into the whole, hey, you used to play in Nashville and now you've ruined their cup dreams. How does that fail? What's that like there, Patrick?

So I wanted to ask him that question. So he kind of breaks away and he starts talking with other media and he's doing some questions in Swedish. And so I'm waiting. As anyone who's been, who does this gig knows, like, you wait out the foreign language questions or whatever, and you ask another question when they've gotten there three or four from Often Blattetet or, uh, AK dash, friggin sports or whatever the fuck. Love that. Subscribe. So, uh. Press on. So, no, they ask some questions in Swedish.

And so I go to a horn question. I'm just like, Patrick, just wondering. And he fucking jabbs his finger at me. Mm. And goes, no. Swedish! I'm like, I'm sorry, man, I'm sorry. And I just kind of walk away and go interview

somebody else. Wow. At no point ever like an apology. I actually had an apology from one of the Swedish writers in the scrum saying, hey, sorry, that was weird. Sorry about that. Wait, did you like cut in or did you wait? No, I literally was waited until there was a break in the questions, having him having answered four or five questions in Swedish. Assumed it was just like every other scrum, but...

No, Swedish. That's fine I wish you had that on audio Because then we could do bits Where it's like Scarlett Johansson Is she finished? No Swedish

I might have it on audio If I was more prepared I probably would have found it Being on the ice is a weird deal After the team wins the cup Because like you You have a job to do Which is to kind of capture their

Their like You know reaction to this thing You can't get in the locker room Obviously because that's where the real party is So like You know, you're trying to do the best you can to talk to these guys, but give them space to celebrate with their teammates, celebrate with their kids, like fucking putting babies inside the cup bowl and shit. And that's where they poop, by the way, according to Chris Draper. Of course.

But, um... It's why I poop. But yeah, it's the most, it is the most amazing thing to be on the ace after a cup win and just see all the dynamics happening, all these little mini celebrations happening. see how Mario celebrates the cup with his boys and shit like that. It's pretty great. Yeah, you don't care. I'd rather just talk to them like it's a regular post game, and then after 15 minutes, I can go fucking party with their kids

and their moms and their girlfriends or whatever. Like, I hate standing around. Because, like, you feel like an asshole. I remember, like, it was the year the Red Wings won the Cup in 2008. And I was, like, chasing around Thomas Kopetsky, or Kopecki. however he was pronouncing his name at that point. And like, you feel like, first of all, they're on skates and you're not.

Right. They can get away from you real easy in that environment. Hold on, I'm shuffling in my chucks after you. And it's often just like a standard, like, quote. Like, I'd rather just, you know, do the normal routine in the locker room and then leave and then let them all go get hammered on the ice with their family. That'd be better that way. Yeah.

The going on the ice thing loses its luster by, like, the third time you do it. Because you don't want to fall down. You want to fall down. You can't find people. Like, I'm tall, so I can usually see over the crows. out and try to find a guy I want, but like that's, like, you know, once you get beyond like 15 feet, it's like, is that Patrick, Patrick Kane's like five, nine. You can't find him on the ice. That was me trying to find Jim Rutherford after they won the cup. Yeah. It's like, you're like,

you're like a detective. You're like asking people randomly, hey, I've seen this fellow here? You are. You put up a picture of Mr. Magoo. And then you're like, where is he? And like, I went to Bob McKenzie. I'm like, have you seen Jim Rutherford? He's like, yeah, I saw him over there in that corner a few minutes ago. Now you go over there and you're like, where is he? You seen this old gentleman? Yeah, you're like, on the trail of like, I remember like in 2012 or 2014, like people were like, man, Dean Lombardi was so great. I'm like, where was Dean Lombardi? I looked for him for like 15 minutes.

It was like, oh, he was by the benches. And then someone else was like, no, no, no, I think he was actually by the scorers table. Like, no, he was actually in the middle of the eyes with his family, Andrew Doughty. I'm like, it's like the end of the Thomas Crown Affair where they're all walking around with the black hats on. Like, are you sure you actually interviewed Dean Lombardi or just like some other guy who frames people for crimes. Wow. Good call out there. I finally found Jim Rutherford, and I said, so I had a quick question about Sidney Crosby.

Ho? You know, Sidney Crosby, your captain. Captain? Captain who? I'm the Titanic? And then you're like, well, I'm Gennie Malkin, he's like, hold on. Evgeny Malkin, not one of the top 100 people of all time. Completely lucid.

Are you serious? Tell me about it. Heweree Malkin, who? The big rush on your team. Oh, let me talk about him for a moment. How upset I am about this 100-Garish players. Based on his score just the points per game over the last 10 years, he is one of the three best players in the history of hockey.

How was he not one of the 100 best players, according to the National Hockey League? Let's talk about the game real quick. It was boring. What else? Next. Dan Girardi was bought out today. As I said about this series, last time we talked, it's Vancouver, Boston. Like, out, and there was no game seven and no one attempted to burn down the city.

Yeah. But like. But Vancouver, Boston, first two games were the overtime. The hockey was bad, though. It was bad hockey for the most part. And it was bad hockey, a goalie that couldn't win on the road. and then everything around the series was the best thing ever. And I feel like that about this series.

Like, this was a very memorable cup final, but not for the hockey necessarily. I don't even think it was that. Like, in five years, do you think anyone's going to care about Listerine? No, but people will care about what happened in Nashville. People care about, you know, 50,000 people outside the arena to watch a hockey game in Nashville. Like, people would care about that. No, because to viewing parties, no one's going to, like, when you think back on, like, Stanley Cup finals, you don't think about what happened around the Stanley Cup final.

Think about the final itself. I think about all those people in lawn chairs outside of the arena in Tampa Bay. I think about them a lot. What do you think about when you think of the Red Wings Hurricanes Stanley Cup Final? Do you think about barbecue in the parking lot? No. I don't think about Carolina getting steamrolled. I mean, honestly, I don't really think of Carolina all that much.

I don't know about you. They're not really an existing franchise as far as I'm concerned. No offense to the great fans in Carolina, who I love so much and would gladly drink and eat barbecue with you before a game. but I don't think about your friends too much. Oh, you know what? But that could also be some devils like, you know, PTSD from what happened at that UC Yokin game that one time. Oh, the two goals in 40 seconds.

One of Marty's lowest moments. Yeah, that Eric Stogel is still pretty bad. Well, there was that one time Marty tried to make a save and his pants ripped. That was probably when it was lowest moments too. When did that happen? I'm just assuming it did. Like he bent over and all of a sudden he was in like a nutty professor with Eddie Harvey? Shot saved, bro, or holy smokes on the reaper.

It looks like his big old belly Block the puck. Oh my goodness. Talk about blunder. This is a blunder. Doc and Eddie, he's about 45 pounds overweight. According to the latest FDA regulations, he shouldn't be eating this much meat. Remember when Marty got super in shape

after Sean Avery called him the fat pig or whatever? That one offseason he showed up and he actually looked like he was an athlete and then that was it after that he was like, he got into like Tinder shape. Yeah. And then oh, are you familiar with this new dating app called haters. No, what is that?

It's a dating app. I just downloaded it yesterday because Katie Coffin, former of the Tampa Bay Lightning social media situation. You match with people, not based on your likes, but the stuff you hate. So it's like a cynical dating service. A dating service for cynics. For just like, like you go on there. Like the examples they have are like, do you hate people who walk really slow? And I'm like,

oh my God, I'm going to meet so many people I want to hang out with based on this app. So like you swipe whatever. Like there's four ways to swipe. Like, it's not just left and right. Like, I forget exactly what it is, but it's just always be down. It's just, yeah, like, it's always like, it's like, do you like kids' birthday parties? Hey, do you like sunsets? Hey, I like the sun when it's up. Like, it's just miserable people are trying to get together to have sex.

So, so that's an interesting thought because do you watch Silicon Valley? I forget. Mm-hmm. Okay, the episode where Dinesh goes out with the hacker. Yeah, the girl. And they have absolutely nothing in common until they both start talking about what a shit gilfoil is. Right. Like, there's something to be said for connecting over, like, how many relationships are born from, like, two coworkers bitching about their boss at happy hour or something?

Right. Like, the idea that there is a, the first connection between two individuals being from a place of sheer cynicism and hatred of something else is beautiful to me. I think it works. Right. I think there is more to finding love through hate than there is through finding love through a storybook, you know, destiny type deal with some person. Yeah, I agree. Like, I want to find someone who agrees that game six This Stanley Cup final was the most boring

clinching Six or seven in the history of high. It was just bad ice, bad refereeing, no, like Matt Murray was pretty good in the game And then it ends on a bad goal from behind the net Please do that because nothing, nothing speaks in a dating profile more than likes hockey. Yeah, I know I really like hockey in comic books and Star Wars

Oh, you've seen my haters profile, have you? You bastard? There should be 11 more Star Wars movies. Speaking of Star Wars. Hold on. The goal in game... SimRecruiter! Oh no.

I was at there. The goal in game six. Did you have a problem with it? The no goal for the Predators? Oh yeah. What do you mean? Of course, it was a fucking goal. Is it an incompetent referee not doing his job?

But is that an incompetent referee or is it an incompetent rulebook? It's an incompetent referee. The rule book sucks too, but that's an incompetent referee. The problem with the rule book is that... When they talk about the continuation of a problem... play. Apparently, like, in their minds, the NHL believes that means the actual shot from Forresburg, not another player scoring. But to me, like, the continuation of a play is, you know, puck's trickling through the crease and then it's right there and the play continues and now

it's in the net. It's the immediate recovery role in football where if you fumble the ball, whistle blows, the other team falls on it right away, it's their ball, even though the whistle blew. It should be the same exact thing. Like, yeah, the puck's sitting in the crease, and a guy taps it in 0.4 seconds after the whistle blows, it's a goal. If it's, like, the intent to blow or the premature whistle when the puck is, like, in someone's pads and a guy jams it out of there, like, that shouldn't be a goal. But when the puck's just laying in the crease, man, like,

there's two referees, too, like, give it a beat. If, you know, you've lost side of the puck, there's another guy right on the other side of the play. Yeah. Who can maybe see it or maybe not. And again, like, you know, the continuous play thing is so hilarious because we live in an era now with the NHL where you can have a play where a team has,

17 attempts to try to clear the puck from their own zone doesn't. The other team scores and then it gets waved off because a guy's skate was a half inch off the ice. Like that that continuation is fine. You know, we don't penalize the incompetence of the other team for that. But on this one, it's like, oh, no, no way. The whistle blew. And the NHL sucks too because if this happens in any other sport where they find like a crazy loophole that leads to an awful call that changes the championship game.

Like, they're on it. They're on it right away. You know? The NFL's literally... The NFL literally apologizes for shit when they get it wrong. Right. Yeah. Like basketball.

Basketball had a problem with balls going out of bounds in the last minute, touched by the wrong guy or whatever, and they give possession to the wrong team. And they're like, well, we're going to review all that now. Like, yeah, like the last two minutes of an NBA game take 44 minutes. Yeah. But at least they're... I'd rather take 44 minutes and they get it right.

Right. The NHL's apologies are, well, you know, the... The concussion spotter rule doesn't actually say boards. So I don't know what you want from us. We gave you a minute and 25 second five on three. First of all, that's not a helpful thing for the predators. Like, are you kidding me? Like, if you gave the penguins that in that situation,

it's like, okay, fine, they can score on the power playing. The predators can't. It destroys me when they try to pretend that this shit isn't scripted. I know. And at game six, it's like, oh, fuck, we just took a goal from them. How about the next 27 penalties? And then the best is like when they don't score on that, people are like, well, they had their chance. They had their chance.

First of all, if you have four power plays and you score on one out of every four, you have the best power play in hockey. Like, the four power plays is never, ever guarantee a goal. If seven, if they give them seven, I would have been like, all right, fine, you had a chance. But four, nope. You screwed up again. But don't worry, because they're going to fix those two problems the competition committee found, which were icings and face-off placement after a puck goes. out of play during a power play.

Timeouts after icings. Timeouts after icing. Because who doesn't want better... Oh, wait. I'm sorry. I guess the better hockey would be if a team is really, really tired. Really, really tired teams

always leave the goals. But yeah, I mean, don't remedy anything else. Nope. Don't remedy a penalty kill that runs like over 95% most of the league. Don't remedy that stuff. Just like remedy the timeout thing after icings. That net should be the same size

until the day we die. And by the way, the timeout after icings means that you've used your timeout, which means you can then not use it for a coach's challenge later in the game. So it's like it's an actual thing that you're doing to, you're sacrificing that opportunity to make sure that your face-off guy isn't suck and win. It's like, it's very stupid.

But it's typical. But you know what's going to happen is now, after every icing like that, oh, man, looks like Matt Mary's got a skate issue. Oh, it looks like Ken Hitchcock is going to swap out Ben Bishop for Carrey Latin in here for a, oh, that'll be the thing now. Golly swaps, fake injuries, fake strap issues. It's like, Slice your mask.

What? Slice your fucking mask. We need a time out. Slice it! Then Murray just drops his mask to the ground. And his big blank of hair pops out. Oh, boy. You're all over the Blanca hair.

I said Blanca Hair to somebody at the Cup Final. I was Jason from Prohockey Talk, and he just gave him no sold it. And I'm just like, oh, that's right. He's the jock and Halford's the geek. Is that how you see those, too? That's how I see those two. I miss seeing those guys.

I'm dying to see those guys somewhere just so I can ask them about their headlines. Like Halpert goes on his shoulders and he's like, me, me write hockey for NBC. I don't get that reference. Jason beats up people. That was a Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome reference. Oh my goodness. I know. Oh, oh my goodness says the guy who made the Thomas Crown Affair remake reference moments ago.

That's a fucking great movie. Everyone's seen and it's on HBO all the time. I'm not judging its quality, sir. Running Russo's naked a lot. It's a good movie. Indeed. Jamal artist writes in Can you confirm whether there is smoke coming out of Dave Lozo's ears

When talking about Crosby Winning the Khan-Smith I don't know, he's wearing headphones that actually work for once So I'm assuming the smoke is building up And it will shoot out like a locomotive Let it release right there Are you pissed off or do you agree that he deserves it like the rest of us do? Like the rest of us

Last year he stole it this year It's just a bad bad choice Why is it a bad show? I still don't get this idea that Malkin deserved it more than Crosby if in fact you're going to say Malkin. Of course. Why? He was the best player on their team for four rounds.

But he wasn't, though. Yes, he was. So Sid was a point behind playing one less game and had points and games that actually mattered versus Gino who didn't. It's weird. The only games that matter, the ones were Crosby gets points, even though they both had the same amount of points, basically.

Yeah, because they're called Game 7, game 5 of the conference of the Stanley Cup final, Game 4 of the Ottawa series. Malkin didn't have a point in game 5? Malkin scored a goal in game 5. The set of three assists. More points, more impact. And he had, as we'll call it, from now on,

he had the penalty draw. That's what the capital P, capital D, the penalty draw in the first 50 seconds of game five. They're actually building a statue of it right now with Mike Fisher, I think, is somebody. Crosby got annihilated the first two games of the cup final of five on five. annihilated.

Well, if it helps, if it helps, Sid got 11 first place votes for the consmite and Gino got 11 second place. So it's very possible that all of the people who voted for Crosby acknowledged that Malkin was the second most valuable player. I swear to God,

a Jake Gensel finished second in the consmite voting. I would have gone on a John Wick fucking murder spree for everybody that did that vote. I would have went to their houses and I would have double-tapped all of them, all of them.

And I still might do it anyway because how did nobody put Pecker-Rennie in their top three? Yeah, that's kind of crazy, right? What kind of dumbass, not paying attention to the first three rounds of bullshit is that? That's really interesting, because I'm sure there were some veteran voters who gave the Khan Smyth to J.S. Jigar in 2003 based on his first three rounds of the playoffs, ignoring him not being good in the last round of the playoffs. Again, what's the difference? And left Pecoranay's name out of the Kahn Smyth voting. What's the difference?

Jashigar, Canadian. Pecoran, not a Canadian. P.K. Subang got... Matt Murray played less than half the goddamn postseason and got a vote. P.K. Subban got more votes for Consmite than Pecker any did. Like Subban and Kessel, I don't know. Suban I can kind of get, because he plays big minutes against Top.

But Castle? You gave Kessel a fucking vote this year, man? Like, he's fine. He's, he wasn't. My argument is Eric Carlson should have got more votes. Eric Carlson got one third place vote. But I will say, to whoever did that, anonymous voter, you, sir, are a patriot. I agree.

Yeah. The idea, it's not the NBA Award. The NBA Award is the MVP of the finals. The constant myth is for MVP of the playoffs. Was there anybody more viable to his team than Eric Carlson in the playoffs? Of course not. Well, I love Kenny Malkin. We all know how this league works if you're really good in Russia.

It's amazing how, like, when you're Russian and you're really good, it's always like, well, he's just, you know, if he only tried harder, he's just not that good defensively. Like, he scored in three of the first five Stanley Cup final games. He was a beast in every round. Is Sid in your top five players of all time? I'd say so. I'd say so, too. The thing that's happening now, which I find really fascinating is, like, when the top 100 came out, and we wrote our book, The 100 Greatest Players in NHL history and other stuff,

available on Amazon.com. There are people that are like, Yins know Mario is better than Wayne, right? Inns know he should be the best player of all time, right? And I'm like, sure, I mean, you can make the argument. I get that. And now, a scant few months later, Yin's, I think Sid's better than Mario? It's happening.

There are debates happening right now post this series on whether Sidney Crosby is a better, more complete player than Mario Lemieux. And you know what? He might be. No, I'd still take Mario. Peak Mario over peak Sid. Mario was one of the most unstoppable athletes I've ever seen. But offensively, I think Sid might be a better all-around player.

But Mario was just... Mario was a much better offensive player than Sid is. Yeah. He was unstoppable. But, like, I don't, I was, like, 11 when he played. I don't really recall taking notes on his two-way game. Like, I don't remember. Sid's a better skater.

It's better defensively. Is he? Mario's better. Everyone's a better skater today, though. That can't really be a thing. Well, I mean. You know what I mean? Well, thank you, though, because that's also part of the equation is it's harder to score today.

It's harder to play today. Goalies try, are better today. Defenses are better today. There's more teams. All of the shit today is harder, which is why we put, Malkin on our list, and also Carlson, you know, various other people. But, like, Sid's doing it against the toughest opposition that has ever been in the NHL and Mario didn't.

Malkin and Carlson made us like really good because we were, we wrote the book and then four months later, they're getting cons to my votes. All of a sudden, they're the best, wow, I didn't realize how good Carlson was. You know who did? Me and you and Down Goes Brown. Would have six thumbs and realized it? We did. We did.

And also Down Goes Brown, wherever he may be. Sean as well. Wait, what were you just talking about? I had a thing. Sid and Mario. Okay, right. How yinsna, we're going to replace Mario in that, which Rich Pilon statue with Sid?

Gretzky, Mario, Bobby Orr, Gordy Howe, and then Crosby? Is that what we're saying? You could make the argument that Sid was better than Gordy Howe? Oh, no. Come on. Gordy was better than Sid. I mean, era-wise, he can't just say.

So Sid jumps ahead of, like, Maurice Richard or Jean-Bellevo, assuming that relieving goalies out of the equation. Is Sid better than Dominic Hachach? Whoa. Yeah. It's not a Hachick's fault, though. He just got started so late because he was behind Belfour

and also wasn't Canadian, therefore had to sit behind inferior Canadians. Yinsnell, he was a poor man's Tom Barrasso. Fucking Tom Barrasso. Like, I wrote a thing once that that hypothesized, theorized, hypothesized, yeah.

Were you measuring Sidney Crosby? Oh, that's hypotenuse. I was scientifically hypotenusing. that Crosby's 1,000 points were more impressive than Gretzky's 1,000 points. Oh, wait. Did you actually write this? Where can people find this? You find it on Vicerports.com. Just search Lozo, Crosby 1,000, and awesome take.

Crosby greater than sign, Wayne Gretzky. Like, I don't know how people do the adjusted era stuff, but I would love to know what Crosby's first thousand points were, like, compared to... Because, like, it's hard to do because, like, there's, like, some of it, like, information's not available from back when Gretzky first started playing. But, I mean, like, goals per game, way up back then and like Crosby did it in like 150 more games or something like that. Do you have more respect for guys that, no, that's why you're on haters?

Haters. Do you have more respect for guys that are able to do this thing without having a co-star, the level of Messier, Ron Francis, or Yvgeny Malkin? Yeah, that's the other thing too. You look at what John Tavares does and say, wow, that is an amazing accomplishment considering there is absolutely no way the second line of that Islander's team gets a minute of thought from the opposing coach. And, like, Gart Snow has basically spent the first eight years of John Tavares' career tying fucking ankle weights around his skate so he can't fucking do anything. You look at...

PA Parento. Like, Sackick had Forzburg or Forzburg had Sackick. Eizerman had Federoff and Federoff had Eiserman. I mean, Modano, I think, did it mostly himself, but he also had New and Dyke for those few years. Yeah. Like, everybody needs a co-star, man. You know?

Except for John Tavares. If you're not with the one you can play with, honey. Play with one that you love. Play with one you're with. Play with the one you're with. I don't know. Like, they gave, whenever they give Crosby anybody to play with, though, like he just, like we talked to.

last week he can never find any sort of chemistry like hosa Kessel I have a I posited a theory about that and writing about Sid and Gino after game six Let me let me lay this on you know Gino Jinn's note You know if you put fries on Gino he's perfect Um

Sid works well with the Gensels Connor Shiri's and Brian Rustle the world Because players that have played for many years Ie a Marion Hosa or Phil Kessel for example they have their hockey brain trained to play a certain way to be successful. And to then change what they do because they're playing with Sidney Crosby, who thinks 25 steps ahead or whatever, is difficult for them. I agree.

So you get these... But what about Coonitz? Coonet's showed up, and he was already... Well, Coonet is the rare exception that actually knew how to play with Sid. But then you look at shirying Rust and Gensel, and those are babies. And what can you do with a baby? You can teach a baby to rob a bank, for all I know. That's why they have the baby driver.

So they don't know any better. And so Sid can be like, I want you to do this. And kind of Sherry's like, well, I don't know how to play hockey yet. I'm a baby. And Sid tells him what to do, and then they do it. And that's why he's able to play with those younger players better than the veteran guys. They're more imprintable than the veteran guys. That's my new theory on Sidney Crosby.

And his inability to find chemistry with any line made. I feel like he should have worked with Carl Hagelin. Like he's fast, left-handed. He fits all the things. things you'd want with the Crosby. I don't know. I just, yeah, like, I just think it's more, it's the mental, know what it is. What?

I don't think it's the, you know, soft, mushy child brain, baby brain that all those guys have. Jake Gensel has under his angelic tussled blonde hair. You know what it is? What is it? It's that, like, it's just younger people in general are smarter than us. You know what I mean? Like, so, like, like, Crosby's 30, so anyone who's, like, 22 has, like, the hockey. acumen that Crosby had when he was 22, only now he's 30.

So now they line up mentally because any, it doesn't matter, it could be any 22 year old. Right. They're already there. Yeah, exactly. They're on that same thing. So you're saying that the Jake Gensel to Sidney Crosby thing is, is like how Pete Blackburn knows that you should be blogging and doing your video on Gleplorp instead of on Tumblr. Exactly.

Right. Exactly. Like, I'm smart, but like, I don't understand Snapchat. I don't know why anybody would ever fucking use Snapchat. Well, it makes your tongue look like a giant dog tongue. Like, by the way, that is one of my favorite things when a tweet goes viral, because, like, you can see all the people, like, the little tiny avatars of them when they've tweeted you. And, like, you can always see, like, the dog ears people still.

Yeah, exactly. And also, now whenever an image goes viral, it goes, it's obviously from Snapchat. Like, every single time, it's on Snapchat. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because people still believe that, like, that shit disappears. You can throw it into the ether. It's no one's going to fucking screen cap. Which was, like, the big draw of it.

Was my first start? It was like, send your dick to somebody and don't worry about it ever being a problem for you ever again. Here's me blowing a watermelon. He'll be gone on five seconds. Screen cap. Anyway, I'm running for Congress in a couple months. Don't anybody share those than anybody.

Like, Christ, man. Like, there's nothing, I don't understand it. Like, it's either you just want to look at the photo forever or never again. And Snapchat really doesn't give you the option to do either. It sucks. Yeah. But, like, my point is, like, I'm 39. I don't really understand it, but like every 19 or 22-year-old does.

So, like, if I was like the Sydney Crosby of Snapchat, no one my age would understand it. So I'd have to have Snapchat buddies who are like 23. So if you were the best guy at Snapchat of all time, your peers, the people that around you in your age group wouldn't appreciate it. They wouldn't be able to follow. Some Jake Gensel that's on Snapchat would be like, man, the way that you made your eyes look like anime eyes

and put little butterflies around it, that is the work of a Snapchat message. You're like, thank you. Come on my line with me. Right. It didn't sound right. Play on my line with me. I want you on my hip.

No, wait. Hold on. I just think you're good at Snapchat is all. I need you behind me. I need you. You have followers on Snapchat? Is that the word they use? Yeah, absolutely.

Oh, so maybe you're secretly the old Pete Blackburn. I'd like to think that I am. Look at these guns. That motherfucker fucker bought a team Canada at fucking Jersey the other day. You see that on Twitter? No, I didn't. What's his name, Jeffaulet up in Toronto?

Oh, Jeffler. The most popular man in the world. Sent Pete a Canada hockey jersey, and he's like, yes, I got this. First of all, it's got sleeves, so I don't know why Pete would ever wear that one. Excellent point. Especially in summer. It's Canada, man. Like, you've got to have, like, he's addicted to jerseys to the point where he's rolling up in a Canada jersey.

I have maybe, I have maybe 15 jerseys. 15. Yeah. And I own. I own a Flyers jersey I own a winter classic Mike Richards

jersey Get the fuck out of this studio I will do the rest of this by myself I had a meet up in Washington DC once with JP from Japers Rink We had like 250 people there to watch the NHL awards

And I come rolling out In a Mike Richards Flyers jersey In front of the cabs crowd Because I should be on haters Is why That's exactly the reason There you go

But no This is just A Flyers jersey is not... For you, it has to be a Ranger jersey. For Pete... I don't... I don't own a Ranger jersey. I could never own a Ranger jersey.

They're ugly jerseys, too. I mean, let's be fair. Well, the one... The Crown one was cool, though. The Statue of Liberty had won. You didn't like that? Those were, like, the goofy late 90s years where all the jerseys were bad.

Like, the one that has just Rangers across is fine. Yeah, I mean, maybe I like it because of that very, very fact that when I see that logo, I think of them giving Bobby Holick a billion dollars. It is pretty funny. But as far as like the original six ones go, I think the Rangers are probably six. I don't like... All right. Okay, real quick.

Blackhawks? Or are you going to do that whole like Rangers thing? I'm going to do Toronto. Okay. One, Montreal, two. Chicago three. Boston four. Red Wings five.

Rangers six. Okay. Just as Rangers. Chicago. Montreal. Detroit. Detroit's three because I really like

the white Chicago Detroit jersey The I'm not They're both really good It's like Montreal Detroit You can go back and forth on But Chicago's one

Montreal Detroit Trana Toronto Trana T dot T dot I'm missing I love the Leafs

Home and away They're good Oh actually you know what The Leafs did change their jerseys this year I forgot about that Chicago, Toronto. Boston?

Oh, yeah, Boston Rangers. Yeah, the Rangers, the Rangers wear that special heritage jersey. That jersey sucks, too. I don't know. By the way, Adidas, what the fuck does form the future mean? Yeah, so it looks like a typo.

It looks like it should say from the future. Like, these are jerseys from the future. Not only that, but the viral, or the attempt at being viral photos of the new jerseys they've been sending out look almost exactly like the campaign for Justice League, which is probably going to be a giant pile of dog shit. Oh, my God.

So don't evoke bad things. No, I don't get it. I don't know what the jersey is going to look like. I know that I've heard the devils, they're getting rid of the, uh, of the stripes around the waist is what they're going to get rid of on the jersey. So it's going to be like a cleaner look. And meanwhile,

the ducks, the ducks get to go on wearing those things and they're not going to change those at all. Exactly. Speaking of Justice League, did you see Wonder Woman? Not yet. Have you seen it? Neither have I. I don't know if I'm going to. I'm on the fence. I think I'm definitely going to see it. Might see it with my daughter. No, don't. Apparently it's fucking like horrifically violent. Like you should not bring your kids to see that apparently. Definitely bringing my daughter. Yeah, great. Make your daughter cry and hate Wonder Woman for the

rest of her life. Well, I assume Wonder Woman does the violence. Well, it doesn't matter. No, it's like, I think there's like a Nazi scene or not Nazis. What are they fighting in this one? They're fighting Nazis. Are they fighting Nazis? Yeah. I thought this was a different war. No, I thought that was that war with the Nazis. This is like friends. Who did they fight in World Point being is that I'm sure you're talking about some scene where like the villains like melt people's faces or some shit to show the power of their weapons or whatever. No, it's like it's like DC. It's not Marvel. It's not like it's not like what's his name Mr. Agent Smith with his face. It's not like that. Apparently it's like people were tweeting it. Like there's a lot of retweets in my timeline of like kids crying in the theaters. Oh, all right. So don't take her. So I'm just, yeah. I might have to look into it a little bit. Plus I'll have to find seats. And Dave, if you need to find seats for any concerts as awarding events, what should I do? What's the best thing to do? You should probably use Seekek.

I mean, I do. I already have. Well, thank God for that. Everybody should have Seekek on their phones because buying tickets to sports and concerts can be complicated. But there is a better, simpler way to buy. Seekek is the smartest, easiest way to get tickets to live events with Seekek's seamless mobile experience. You can buy and sell tickets in just two taps. Two.

Two taps, buddy. Seatkeek helps you find the best seats and best prices. I've got the app of my phone. By far the easiest way I've found shop for tickets when it comes to. to buying some baseball tickets to chill at the game with a big old hot dog and a they still have rc colet cityfield i remember they had it at shay uh cityfield's fancy now they have like fancy chicken they have like 19 dollar steak sandwich do they've had yeah it's good what's that new chicken place it's got like a weird name to it it doesn't it doesn't even sound like a

pop eyes no is it kfc it's in the outfield i forget the name of it all right to get to get to a met's game or any game you can use seat geek and instantly find seats. And here's why you're going to use it. It sees you time of money by searching multiple ticket sites, compare prices, and find amazing deals. You get the most bang for your buck. They grade every ticket based on value

to help you immediately identify the best seats that fit your budget. So, like, if the seat gets like an A or whatever, you want to get it. But I think it's more numerical than letter grades. I wish everything in life was letter grades, to be honest with you. But you can search by that.

You can search by the, you know, lowest, the highest. You don't have to necessarily. You know what you get. Every purchase is fully guaranteed so you can shop for tickets on Seekek with confidence. With what? Confidence.

Make Seek your go-to app for finding the best deals on every type of ticket. Acting. From sports to concerts. Thank you. Best of all, as you guys know, Puck Soup listeners, get $20 off the first Z-Kkeek purchase. Download the Z-Kie Gap and enter the promo code S-O-U-P.

That is promo code Soup for $20 off your first Seekkekeek purchase. seat geek purchase and we thank them for being a loyal sponsor to this show throughout the NHL season unfortunately if you wanted to get tickets to our live show in Brooklyn coming up on June what is it 29th is it 26th Monday Monday after next Monday after next 26th it's 26 yeah 26th at 7 at Union Hall yes it's 7 wait is it's it door is it 7 show at 8 yeah there it is so Greg will get there like 805 whatever we're saying it doesn't matter because you can't the damn show it's sold out. Well, I mean, maybe you can get like a secondhand ticket outside, you know?

I did see on the official Puck Soup Reddit, there are some people asking for tickets. If you have a ticket, you can't go, I would suggest going there and saying that you have a ticket to gives it somebody. We undersold ourselves. Honestly, when Katie, our producer was like, it seats 100, and I was like, oh, man, 100. You don't even know 100 people. Like, maybe I get some of my friends to go and fill the seats, I guess. And then it was out in like 36 hours. I was like, oh, I guess we probably should have done MHB.

We'll do another one at some point at a larger venue, but thank you to everybody who bought tickets so quickly as we've mentioned before. Fun and games. Yeah. I will spoil something for the show for you right now. Do it.

The bit we did last episode, the Elybridge Gullough episode, and thanks to everybody for pointing out how awkward that interview was and how shitty I did it. That was really good. It got a little uncomfortable towards the back end. Well, it did, but like, you know, there's nothing you can do

he who sins first cast the first stone or whatever the fuck like if you're there talking to jovial space and bears and bears and space and then all of a sudden he pivoted I think Vladimir Poulton does really good with the gays

like put yourself in my fucking shoes for a second and understand what happened to that interview you were like Megan Kelly interviewing Alex Jones but if Alex Jones was like a children's television host and all of a sudden you know went into

You know what I hate about bears? They're not Americans. The land of make believes great. Also, Sandy Hook was a hoax. And it's just like, what? Wait, hold on. I thought we were selling creatine powder. What are you doing?

Put your shirt on. I think, listen, I like the interview. I thought it was fine. I was trying to give him as much of his own rope, if you will, to talk about these subjects. I wasn't looking to, like, turn it into the Lincoln Douglas debates. I'm glad that some people enjoyed it. But again, like, if you think I did a shitty job, but just put yourself my shoes for a second.

I understand the way the things went in that in view. Because it was weird. It is as shitty as it was, and somebody tweeted this at us. So I guess we can talk about it today. What? The French fry list of ranked French fries? We'll do that in a second. Somebody sent it to us, and they were like, what do you think of this?

Like, we don't like to do more than two hours, but if you want a five-hour show, I can give you three hours about why this is the worst list in the history of the internet. Fucking waffle fries. Go ahead. Let's do it. Let's get into it right now. You want to do it now?

You clearly have a bur in your stuff. saddle as it were. First of all, it's a nonsensical list. Okay, all the styles of French fries ranked. And the third thing on the list is fucking tater tots. Tater tots are not fries. Just because they're a potato doesn't mean it's a style of french fry. It's not a baked potato is not a French fry. And how is it third? If you're going to put that on the list wise, cheese fries are ninth, as if like there's only one kind of cheese fry. Like there's curly fries on here, there's crinkle cut, There's just, you know, British chips, steak. You can put cheese on anything, and it automatically becomes better.

How is cheese fries below tater tots? And below cheese fries are chili cheese fries, the best form of fries, which, once again, you can make anything a chili cheese fry. If I made... And what's a potato tornado? What are these things on this list? Oh, a potato tornado is something you find at, like, a state fair. It's like a, it's like a cabab with a julienne potato on it that's deep fried.

But it's a certain style of... fry on the stick, right? It's not, again, you can put any fry on a stick. Technically a French fry. I think it's fair to say it is. By the way, I want to interject my favorite lead from anything I've read in journalism in recent memory. Came to us from the Today Show

website, which covered the ranking under the headline, this French Fry ranking list is surprisingly controversial. Here's the lead. Quick, name your favorite style of French fry. Chances are slim that your top pick aligns with that of a list that is

audacious enough to, comma, get this, comma, rank all style of fries. Whoa. That's written by one cool dude. It was a lady. Listen, here's my take on the list. It's a bad way.

Waffle fries, Belgian fries, tater tots, standard cut, garlic fries, curly fries are your top six. All you got to do there, in my opinion, is flippity floppity Belgian fries and waffle fries, Belgian fries being the best type of fry. Waffle fries are fine for what they are, which is a delivery system for condiments.

And you know your boy loves condiments. But again, garlic fries. You can put garlic. You can bake that in and cook that into any single type of fry. Let me tell you what I would do. Steak fries. Get the fuck out of here, Tater Tots. Make room for curly fries number three on this list. Get rid of Tater Tots altogether.

That's not a French fry. You know what the problem with Tater Tots is? Imagine if you go to a restaurant and you're like, I would like a burger and fries. And they brought you a burger on a plate with Tater Tats. You'd fucking send it back because that's not French fries. And you'd be like, this is going to shock you because I do have a credit card and a driver's license. I'm not four years old.

You don't have to give me Tater Tots to my meal. Okay, now that's a different argument. Tater tauts are still edible for all ages. Tater tots are fine. I've had good tauts in the sense that they've been covered in stuff. Like, I've had like cheese tauts and they're fine or whatever. But like, here's the thing about tater tots that make that they should disqualify them from being anywhere near the top six on this list. the disintegration factor

rare is the tater tot that's cooked properly can't put a fork into it and bring it to your mouth most times they fall apart they fall apart they fall apart you know it looks like

when they slice the tonton open and empire strikes back and all the weird white guts fell out that's what it looks like when you open a tater tot when it falls apart in your fork and then what do you have you have a layer of weird white

tater guts all over where the fries should be so fuck tater tots curly fries should be number three behind Belgian fries fries and waffle fries. And also, one more for you. Shoe string fries? Get out of here.

You're a garnish. You are a garnish. Those are children's potatoes, shoestring fries. Those are the kind of fries you get, like, in the children's meal when you go to the restaurant, and there's, like, the children's menu, and it's, like, four choices. Yeah. Chicken fingers with shoestring fries. Shoe string fries exist so you can put them on top of, like, steak.

Like, that's where they exist. They're a garnish. You might as well put parsley on the list. Sweet potato fries. Now, let's talk about this for a second, because I feel like we're I'm actually opposed on sweet potato fries. I happen to be a fan, not as big of a fan as Ruby. Ruby would probably put them first or second. I think she put them second when we discuss this, as we often do.

Well, didn't she have, like, a frosty or something as, like, the third best fast food item on her website's list of food? Belgian fries, number one, sweet potato fries number two on her list, I believe. I have got time for sweet potato fries. With barbecue sauce, sweet potato fries are really good. Would I put them as low on this list? They're, like, 12th? No, they should be higher than 12th. Should they be above crinkle cut fries?

Probably not. And certainly not above standard cut fries, but they're good, but you don't like them. In small doses, like, you can't, like, if you gave me like a large McDonald's fry, I could eat all that. If you gave me the same volume of that in sweet potato fries, I can't do it. Like, there's something about the taste. But let me ask you this. If you could pick any French fry in the world to have from any restaurant, fast food, whatever, What are you going with?

Not just a style of fry, a fry from a place. Okay. If I could only have one, if I'm on death row, and they're like, along with all of the Taco Bell you've watered, you could get fries from someplace. Just go next door. There's probably something. And no, like, no cheese, no chili cheese,

because we all understand that makes the fry better. Just the fry itself. Where would you go to get your fry? Legitimately? Five guys. Yeah, it's a good answer. But with the spicy on it. The spicy and give me a big old pile of ketchup, and I'll eat those fries every time.

McDonald's, obviously, being number two. McDonald's fries are unimpeachable, but, like, Five Guys' fries to me are my favorite fries right now, with the caveat that, like, fucking duck fat fries are great, but there's, like, I can't think of, like, where the warden would get them in a pinch. Like, like, what comes into your head when you're, like, fries? Five guys. Five guys. What about you? Nathan's.

I love Nathan's fries. Oh, that's a good choice, though. So that would be standard cuts. Yeah, well, no, those are crinkle cut, right? Those be crinkle. Oh, no, no, you're right. Yeah, though. There's a crinkle cut, yeah.

Like, whenever I go to a Giants game, like, I need to get the Nathan cheese fries. Like, they're just so good. I love them. If we can say one thing about the Food Republic, all styles of French fries ranked list, I think we could both agree. Oh, this is from, like, a real website. I thought, like, some troll made it up on, like, weird Twitter to make everybody mad. Oh, look at that. Smiley-faced fries deserve to be last.

They're creepy as shit. I didn't even know those were a thing until I saw this list. Like, who's at the factory poker? in the eyes and burning the eyes in the mouth. Imagine we find a small race of beings. So the happiest little beings in the world. And then we decapitate them all and deep fry them and then make them into French fries. Like that's what it reminds me of.

It's grotesque. It's grisly. And it makes me sad that children don't know any better, that they're given these things. And they don't know any better when they're kids. This fucking tater tots. Why don't I put scallop potatoes on here? I tend to have a problem with food on, with food that has faces. Oh, so you never had like a gingerbread man cookie?

I don't, I find them this ever since Shrek, to be honest with you, I find them disturbing. I put, I put emotions and feelings onto them. What about, like, turkeys? They have faces. Chop off the neck. Oh, you're saying, like, if you don't see it while you're eating. Yeah, like a Christmas story, chop off the fucking neck and before you see them in the food. We'll just turn the fire.

A movie, Christmas story. Well, uh, oh, I say that in Boston, we shall all have smiley face fries. He showed us a picture of himself in a. and an ugly Christmas sweater before he did the show today. He's like, ERA, look at this. It said, like, Fred G-Lay and it had the leg lamp on it. And he actually goes, ERA, get the reference. Yeah, yeah, Tim, we've all seen that movie.

What is it? Is that from Citizen Kane? Oh, that's the sweater that Bruce Willis is wearing in Die Hard, right? It says, I have a machine gun, too. Fred Gile, motherfucker. Come out to the coast. We'll get together. It'll be Frigelais.

Yeah. Thanks. Yeah. Are we done with the first segment yet? Are we done? There's no guess, though. Oh. Do you want to... Vam for a second, because I want to talk about Diehardt,

but I have to find the thing I'm looking for. Okay. What about running rings? How do you feel about them? Um... I like when one shows up in my fries. I don't know if I had... I don't know if I enjoy like nine or ten of them at the same time.

Listen to a lot of Taylor... The surprise one. Like Taylor Swift? I've been listed in 1989 on Spotify since it all came out last week. Okay, ready? Here we go. It's pretty good. Oh, we go. Okay, so do you remember the scene in Die Hard?

Yes. When John McLean is in the bowels of the building, and he runs into Hans because Hans is running around. Worst part of the movie. Looking for making sure the bombs, I think, are still in place, right? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And they run into each other, and then, you know, McLean, like, points his gun at him, and Bill Claygo, Alan Rickman gets rid of his,

accent and goes, oh, you're one of them, are you? And then he says, hey, you know, what's your name? And he's like, Bill Clay. Bill Clay. Right. So at one point, he realizes that it's not Bill Clay, but obviously one of the terrorists. And he hands him a gun that's unloaded. So when Alan Rickman points him points a gun at him, it's like, oh, no bullets.

What do you think I have? fucking stupid and then ding you have a saying well let's just do the whole shit movie let's do the show radio play die hard um so apparently I always thought that he knew it wasn't bill clay because it just what's the chances that it's bill clay it's a guy in a in a European cut suit right doing a really bad American accent thank you that was the other part of it too like he knew the cigarettes were European right right he knew all this shit about them he kind of knew what was going on I just assumed that his John McLean's spidey sense was tingling,

and then he knew that wasn't Bill Clay. However, Stephen D'Souza, the screenwriter of Diehard. Rightfielder for the Tampa Bay Race, too. Exactly, great guy. At a screening for the Running Man... I know. Wait, the 1991 movie with Arnold Schwarzenegger? And Richard Dawson from Family Feud.

Because you're reading this off like it's breaking news, and this is from 25 years ago. Go ahead. Well, I'm assuming this was like a recent screening of a running man. Like not like... Right, over in Alamo, right? Yeah. It was only shown for running men.

There was no women allowed. Explain that a deleted scene would have made it clear how John McLean knew that this was actually a terrorist and not Bill Clay. There was originally a scene at the beginning of the film where Hans Gruber and his team all synchronized their watches and the audience sees that every one of them is wearing the exact same watch. as John McLean begins taking down the bad guys in the building. He notices this fact when searching the bodies. So when he sees Hans Gruber's watch when handing him a cigarette, he knows he's dealing with another terrorist. So it's not Spidey Sense.

It's not European suit. It is the fact that there was actually a scene in the movie where they all have the same watch. He sees a watch on a dead terrorist. Okay, but still, after he gives him the scene, cigarette, there's still like five minutes of like cat and mouse crap. Isn't there like two minutes of like cat and mouse crap after that? Like he could have just put a bullet in his head and ended the whole fucking thing right there. Yeah, no, that's a really good point.

Like why wouldn't he do that? Yeah. Instead he's like, here, take an unloaded gun. Yeah. Oh, I don't know why he's Vinnie Viola in my movie, but that's who he is. And then he tries to shoot him. And then he's like, is it so important to Bruce Wolves that he has to get one over on these guys? I know.

That's the worst part of the entire of the entire of the cacta scheme where it's like. Like, he's like, yeah, yeah. And I'm thinking maybe he points an unloaded gun at me. And then I turn around. I'm like, no bullets. What are the guy I'm stupid? That way he knows I'm smart. And then I shoot him.

And also, like, like, the elevator dings and he's just like, you have a saying? You have a saying? Like, they're trapped in an enclosed elevator. They're basically like fish in a barrel. Yep. Rickman has no gun. He can just turn and just fucking open fire into the elevator and kill like four more dudes.

Or go back and get, Hans. Robert Patrick, the T2 Terminator, says in Die Hard 2, as the ambush is about to happen, remember this? The SWAT team guy that come down, the escalator, or the movie's sidewalk. Robert Patrick's not the bad guy. He is one of the henchmen for the bad guys. He'll know this scene.

The one of the SWAT guy comes down, and he's like yelling at him. He's like, hey, hey, man, what do I look like to you? And the Robert Patrick goes, A sitting duck. A sitting duck. Yeah. Like, again, that's the one part of Die Harder whenever it comes on. I can't listen to Alan Rickman do the American accent.

I can't watch the goofy cat-mouse thing, and I turn it off and come back on every time. It's the one part I can't watch. And every time I see those swat guys get mowed down, I always think back to the first die-hardt when the guy goes, man, we're going to need some more FBI agents. Need some more FBI guys. God damn. Love that hard. All right. So Puck soup is nothing if not educational.

Now we all are on the same page. Why John McLean knows that Bill Clay is not actually Bill Clay. Yeah. So anyway, yeah, so game six was a bag game. All right. We're going to put a cherry on the playoffs now before we get to more important things. Lozo and I have created our top 10 list of our top five each favorite things about the 2017 Stanley Cup playoffs. Oh, right.

Yeah. That was really hard because the playoffs were bad. Okay. It was on a good year. Number five for me is inviting Nashville to the Mike Miliburie hate party. If you are someone who still believes that Nashville is not a true good hockey town, if you're someone that still disparages the good people of Smash. Nashville if you don't like some of the chanting and the catfish and what have you

We should have ranked the things Nashville fans have done in the postseason Maybe you don't like Dirk's Bentley because he spells his name in such an odd fashion Who was the guy that did the rooftop fucking show before game six? Luke Bryan can't trust them two first names There's nothing funnier to me than when they he turns off the roof like he's fucking Bono and the streets have no name video And nobody reacts to it. They're just kind of like Yeah, he started singing baby on board Oh, wait, no, that was a deep cut reference right there.

Whatever he was singing did include the phrase truck, radio, and girl. There you go. But obviously, even if you don't like the predators, you have to admit that them climbing on the Mike Milbury hate train the way they did before game six was beautiful. Even though Milbury wasn't necessarily wrong in his assessment of P.K. Suven putting a, as Sid said, a UFC ankle lock on his ankle. Like, you know. Have you seen Sid's eyes? He could have broken P.K. Suban's arm and gotten up with one little pivot from his hips. I took a picture of Sidney Crosby talking to Chinese media out in the hallway, like before, like, game 3.

And I took a picture of him talking, and I'm like, hey, here's Sidney Crosby, like, talking to Chinese media. I'm thinking the response to me, like, good on him for selling the game across the seas. Little that I know, it was a profile picture. So it was like, girl, you see his ass as like a shelf. He's high-key thick, as the kids say. Or is he low-key thick? You can put a drink on that. So the Mike Milbury hate flowed.

Again, we need to touch on this real quick. As many people know, NBC tried to get rid of anti-mic Milbury signs before game six by bribing fans with NBC hats. It's a fucking hat that you would never wear. You wouldn't wear it to go golfing to protect your head from the sun in an emergency. It's like, what are you doing here? Oh, I'm protesting Donald Trump. Well, I'm going to need that sign. Yeah, well, what are you going to give you for it?

Well, here's a copy of the art of the deal. Here's a Make America great again hat. Right, exactly. You fucking idiots. So the fact that they are all in on the Mike Milbury hate, I think, binds us all. It's the thing that binds us all together as hockey fans, and that's my number five on the list. See, mine's more of an on-ice thing. Mm-hmm.

I like my favorite thing in the whole playoffs in terms of an on-es. ice thing was J.G. Pajos' four-goal game. Oh, yes. Loved it. Absolutely. Ties the game late with his third goal, wins in an overtime with the fourth one, and it was J.G. Pajot. Yeah. Like, and they win the series,

not entirely because of him, but, like, that's how you win a series is when your checking line center scores seven goals and six games or whatever he had, but that four-goal game, it was at home, it was in Ottawa. Like, my thing in the playoffs is I love when the home team wins in overtime. Like, there's nothing sadder than, like,

It wasn't overtime, but, like, Patrick Hornquist scoring that goal. Fucking suck. The air just goes out of the building. You know, it's over. You can hear the bench cheering. But, like, that game, that Pajot, that was just my favorite game of the playoffs. I would have, and a great name is Scream. Pajon!

Pajon! Pajon! My number four choice is when Mark Andrege Flurry entered game one against the Columbus Blue Jackets. It was the single most There was the first land of the playoffs We're all pumped up All right playoffs go And then all of a sudden

Sorry You're dying over here No I'm just I drank a little last night at home Watch TV I'm a little hung over And then all of a sudden Here's Mark Andre Fleury to start the game And no one knows what the fuck happened

And and and And then everybody's writing like All of a sudden they're writing eulogies About the penguins are like No nobody was He sucks he's gonna Bobrovsky greater than sign Fleury It went from like penguins in five to penguins in seven and they still won in five anyway.

But that shock of him being in that game and then obviously the be the first step in the Mark Andre Fleury farewell tour was without question one of my favorite moments of the playoffs. Him passing the cup to Matt Murray was nice. That wasn't on my list. And Sid passing the cup to Ron Hainsey who had never seen it before. Yeah, we totally blanked on that a couple weeks ago and we were trying to figure out who the old guy was on the penguins. It was Ron Hainesie. Like he's the guy that never got to be in the playoffs. I didn't really do line in order.

You could buy the cup with that Brian Campbell money he got a few years ago. Brian Campbell. My number four thing is maybe a lot of people's number one thing. And it's that over a four-game span in the first round of the playoffs, the Chicago Blackhawks scored three goals. That's just too fun. That was just a fun thing to point out for six weeks during the postseason. It was so great. Two shutouts.

And I believe two of the three goals, one of the three. goals was a completely garbage time goal involving tavesy like they just got fucking run out of the building it was great it was absolutely beautiful like all the memes and jokes that that came out of that were just every single time I saw a three goal black hawk joke coming my timeline it was like

seeing an old friend at the airport you just you just wanted to hug that tweet like oh hey buddy and it was one of those losses so like such a devise now maybe in hindsight not as devastating as previously thought because the predator's played for the cup like it was one of those losses that is seriously going to reset it's like a franchise resetting loss.

It's like now it's questioning everything they knew and loved. And now all of a sudden like there's rumors of Patrick Kane being traded on my timeline. He should be traded. That's the guy they should trade. I think. To Buffalo. They can get a ton back. They like they won't get anything for Seabrook, but they can get a ton for Kane.

But that's, I mean, he's, he's still in his prime. He's a scumbag. He's a scumbag. Get rid of him before he does something that's actually going to stick. That's my, that's my take. Wow. He's fucking Neo in the Matrix. right now, dodging bullets at some point.

Cain for Cain. Yeah. That's what you want to do. Kane for Cain, by the way, is Dave and mine's new podcast. Covering all the exploits of Patrick Cain, Avander Cain, Danity Cain, Erica Cain, Big Daddy Cain.

Yep. Raising Cain. Yep. Starring John Lithgow. And also, Kane, the Undertaker's brother. Oh, God. From fire and hell of fire. My number three,

the list is the fact that Brian McClellan, the general manager of the Washington Capitals, took roughly two weeks, I think, before addressing the media after they were eliminated by the Penguins, and then gave the single most candid

45-minute interview I've ever seen by a general manager not named Dean Lombardi. And, like, he spelled out the fact that... What does Dean Lombardi ever been candid? He's full of shit all the time. He's an emo GM.

Oh, God. Dean would always be real emotional about things. No, he's, he's emotional in front of you. And then the cameras turn off and he goes in his office and he's like, how can I frame Dustin Brown from murder? That's what he is. It's not so much planting meth inside his car. It's more like love.

Planting love, a bag of love. I loved the love too much. And that's just what happened. Fucking Dean. You know, this situation reminds me a general Tranquonis from the great, Grecian war of anyway

McClellan talked about how insanely tense game seven was how the minute you walk into the building you can feel how tense

and horrible and shhincter clenching it was and no other person in the Capitol's organization has ever gone on the record

about that I say that if somebody used to cover the team and then he talked about who Vetchkin

not being untouchable which again is something that no one ever talks about Ovechkin for a Gal Cheneok right now, do you do it?

If you're the Capitals? Either side. You need something more than that. Ovechkin will fetch you. Remember how you just talked about how Patrick Kane will fetch you like an amazing package? Yeah, but he's still on his prime. Double it.

No. Oh, fuck off. The money you'd make with Ovechka on your team justifies whatever package you send back for him. I see what you're saying. I'm saying... That's not how you make your team back. Everybody in Montreal already has a Montreal jersey.

How do you get them to get a new one? You put a vetchum on the back of it. That's what I'm saying. Oh, and also you have him change his name to Claude. Sorry, Claudevichkin. No, Alexander, you swap the E and the R at the end, so it's now Alexander Burroughs-esque. And then, oh, oh, a pothrophy. No, we had it.

Alexandria, clovechkin. Claudevechkin. Claudevichin. Yeah. And then he speaks, you know, busted French in a rustic. Russian accent after the game to Renault. What's the cold drought? Labu jute.

Coming up, your first round matchup, the Montreal Canadiens against the Pittsburgh Penguins. Oh, shit. Not again. Who wins a first round series between an Alex O'Evachan-led Montreal Canadiens team and the Capitals? Does anybody win that series? Does Game 7 just go on for infinity? Misery wins.

Break away from a fetch getting over. Oh my God, he shot it into the netting behind them. Do you have any doubt in your mind that if they traded him like they'd make the conference final the next year? Because obviously that's probably how it would work. Not saying they would win, not saying they're a better team, just saying that within the context of hockey gods, one of two things will happen. Either he wins a cup. It's the P.K. Subant Shea Weber theory.

Either he wins a cup or they go to the conference final. No, because they would trade him to Montreal, and they would, for Gal Cheneuk, get slower. Yep. And the caps would now have all this extra money to spend on other stuff, which would make them a better overall team. They should do it. But they would lose a guy who could hit 50 for you. Hit 50 what? Goals.

Oh, I think he meant people, because he likes to run around and destroy his body. Like, he's still 22 years old, and he's not. They do double count hits. Sorry, what was you were saying? So Brian McClellan being candid is my number three. That's your number three. hold on my phone went to sleep mode I got to open it back up again

oh my number three is along those same lines it's the moment that I will think of very fondly much like the Daniel Offertson probably not quote Nick Baxter after game seven announcing to the world

that he gave up after the first three games of the series we didn't lose the series in game seven we lost it after game three you are so hung up on that quote in perpetuity That fucking quote should be a dagger in the eye of every Caps fan who stood up and defended the team's, you know, mental state and toughness and they're not chokers. Like when you lose that game seven where you completely just gave up once they made it won nothing. And then you're after the game, you want to hear things about like, yeah, you know, we pushed hard.

We forced the game seven. We won five and six. You know, we gave it our best, but it just wasn't enough to hear Nick Baxter, who's like a pseudo captain. we lost this series a week ago I just don't know how I don't know how you come back from that I don't know how you leave the team together like that but that is without a question

my number three as Greg is looking at the screen I'm just looking I think you're going to turn around and go I forgot to hit record No record is fine The look on your face was concerned

I was made me concerned Just looking at the levels I think your mic is just really hot as all We lost this podcast And we've got it for Number two for me is Dark guy No, just kidding

It is Oh yeah, I forgot about that guy Sidney Crosby having to answer The Listerine question That to me is hilarious How did that go like I saw his quotes but like was he Like it went like this

It went like this The Predators went first And we all You know Danced around the Sidney said I had bad breathing With Suban And Nikas to Nica

God bless him goes You know you know what we do and we know what you do and like you know that we have to go now and you know talk to Sid right like you know that right and he's like you're going to talk to him about that oh be interested to see if he says the same thing he said to me

the other day and so we go to the penguin's locker room and Sid's sitting in a stall and we're all you know asking them blah blah blah about the game blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah and then it's like someone actually says so Sid Fiké Subaan

said that you mentioned his his breath after after game three and Sid's like just like smiles his contemptuous I can't believe I have to fucking do this

dance with these idiots kind of smile and says yeah I didn't say that yeah he made it up yeah he made that up and that was it and that was it

yeah Sid's not fun oh god so beautifully contentious So that was my number two. What's your number two? My number two, which I will think about every time this situation happens in a game the rest of my life, is how the Penguins were allowed to score a goal while Zach Werenski was bleeding out on the ice.

Really good one. That's a great one. Phil Kessel. In a playoff filled with bad reviews and shitty calls and whatever. P.K. Subang got hit in a leg with a shot during the final and they stopped play. That's a great call. Werensky was bleeding, gushing blood from his face as the penguins were dangling around in the zone behind the net for fucking 30 seconds. Right.

And they let the goal stand. Because he had the nerve to get up off the ice and skate to the bench. Yeah. Yeah. While his right hockey glove was filling up with his own plasma. A defenseman, too, by the way, who would be behind the net or around the net to stop the goal from being scored, referees were like, again, I understand that hockey games aren't fixed. No one's favoring the penguins, but it just seems to always work out where things are constantly going the penguin's way when calls are blown.

My favorite thing from the playoffs number one on my list, sir, you'd almost go into jail if you're throwing a catfish on the ice in Pittsburgh. When you hear my number one, you're going to wish you had my number one. Well, I'm going to tell you right now, your number one better be something great because nothing will beat the fact that a guy was nearly charged with a crime because he used a catfish. as an instrument of crime. Mine's crime related. Mine has an element of illegality. It's still the greatest thing ever.

It is. And of course, like, we're just touching on the police action. We're not even touching on the fact that, man, I bought this fish. It's too big. How am I going to fit it in my boot to sneak into the game? I know. Run over it with a truck. By the way, that guy's 36.

I thought he was like 22. I thought he was just like some dumb young guy that just got out of college. He's 36, 22, 36. Only if she's 5.3. So your girlfriend's got a catfish. She sticks it in her booth. My catfish don't got old spice if you got smells, hon. You can do sidebends or sit-ups.

You're not going to squeeze that fish. He ran over. Sorry. Sorry. He ran over it with... I'm done. The truck. You got one.

You say you got an octopi, but there's only one thing that I spy. Catfish. Well, SportsNet says you're fat. Well, I ain't down with that. Because your gills are small and your fins are kicking. So I'm thinking about sticking. You in my underwear? As long as the police don't care.

Give me some in-laws that talk to for a test. I'm out. I'm done. A catfish looks so fun. I'll use my instrument. Baby got cat. Baby got a cat. We finally crossed the fish. Nashville Faced with a Pittsburgh.

Nashville Faced with Crosby's booty. Oh my God. Oh yeah, what's your number one? I'm going to say the first two words of it, and you're going to feel bad that you didn't list this. Okay. I'm ready for it. Rob Rossi. I'm so sorry, you're right.

I've made a huge mistake. Determining that Matt Niskin and Alex Ovecun planned and executed a head attack on Sidney Crosby in game three of the second round and everything that happened after that. Every

mention of it, anything involving that was just, like, I will think back on that. Like, anytime I see, like, usually, so like three or four years ago when Matt Niskinen was still on Pittsburgh, I had never talked to him before ever. I didn't know anything about him. And his name is Niskinan.

And so I remember being in the MSG press room and asking Rob, I was like, I was like, what's, what's Matt Niskinan's English like? Is he a good talker? And he was like, are you fucking serious? I'm like, well, no, I mean, I know he's been in the country for a while, but, you know, is he English good? He's from fucking Minnesota, Dave. I thought Matt Niskinin was Finnish and maybe speak English because his last name was

Niskin and Katie Strang was there and she made fun of me. But it turns out like he has Finnish heritage and I just never realized I didn't go to his NHL.com page and that's always what I thought of when I thought of Matt Niskin. Now forever I will think about how he was the man who stood up in the locker room during a closed door meeting where they planned to kill Sidney Crosby and then he did it. And again, to go back to the Alex Jones example, it was such a grand conspiracy. theory. But again,

like any great conspiracy theory, there were little breadcrumbs along the way. You were like, just enough. Like, you know,

yins know they call a player's only meeting. Why would they do that? What other reason would they possibly have to do that? There was like another thing that he had too that it was like,

that like the history between Niskin and Sid or something. Like it was, you know, like how else are going to win the series? You know they're going to take out Sid. It's like,

well, why did they just like take him out in the first? shift. Well, yins know they need plausible deniability. Also, it was zero zero at the time. They were down two O in the series and they, and they Madnessy and then got tossed, so they had a five-minute power

play because of that. That was the plan to like maybe go down three-nothing while losing Sidney-Grosby and then going down three-0 in the series. Oh, it was just everything about it. It was just... Your plan on the most richest man on the face of the earth who may be at night a vigilante and

that's your plan? Good luck. Good luck. That's a great number one I take it all back You're right Your list is better than mine Yes Another win for Dave

Another win for the Milosh Dave just opened up a Oreo cookie next to his ear And listen to it And he's decided to make the Rossi thing number one It was fantastic Yeah I love Robb still

I love him a lot We all know them That was just funny NBA versus NHL sir We both watch the The Golden State Warriors Close out The Cleveland Cavaliers

Five games It was a Beautiful tease for a moment that they were going to have. We were going to have a, it was 3-1 moment, but instead the Warriors won. Can we address the constant annual, please like my sportness, of criticizing the NBA for handing their trophy to the owners first? But the players get it in hockey. I thought that was the football thing. That people always get mad about that in football.

Football and basketball. Last night, as we taped this podcast, there was a lot of people that were, or two nights ago, were very bent out of shape about the owners. getting the trophy to which i said one of the odors was peter goober the the uh the the the the hollywood producer who produced batman 89 he should get all the trophies he should just be given all the trophies for giving us that slice of cinematic classic oh god batman 89 who calls it batman eighty nine well to differentiate between that batman 66 with adam west it's called batman that's the name of the movie but there was another batman movie it was one with adam west you can't call it batman because there's another movie called batman wait that batman and adam west

Had that movies? The one were he zoning around with a bomb Around the dock? It's from a TV show, I thought. No, but that was, that was a movie. That was a movie. That was a movie of the TV show. Movie.

You're like slipping into Austin Powers in front of me. It was from the movie. It was in the movie, baby. Yes, that's why they call it Batman 89 to differentiate from the other Batman. I don't give a fucking rat's dry asshole who gets the

fucking trophy first or third. Like, why is that, like, uh. Why is it so offensive to give the owners first. Yeah. Like, they're the ones

who take the financial risk. They're the ones who... They're all part of the same organization. They're all on the same team. Like, who cares if, like, the guy who fucking scored 10 goals or average a triple double or the guy who pays their salaries

gets at first? Like, no one on the court, no one on the ice, no one on the field, no in the locker room. Here's where hockey's better. Hockey's better. The Stanley Cup playoffs are better

because the Stanley Cup's a better trophy without question best trophy in sports they're running out of room they didn't they didn't plan ahead just fuck me with those stories oh yeah you want that bunch of you want me you want you want those stories big boy

a bunch of people being like well okay one person particular being like you know rocket richard's not gonna be on the Stanley Cup anymore and I don't know what to do and I'm like who gives a shit but don't they just like build in another ring like another like layer like at some point they were not going to be on the cup anymore that's just the nature of the cup. They take the rings off the cup. I'm sure

Newsy Lalons family is really pissed off. His name's on in the cup, assuming he ever won one. Boy, if fucking Newsy Lalons' grandkids listen to this podcast, they must hate the fact that he's constantly our go-to guy for old-time hockey. Just because of his name, Newzy. We've had Newsy-Lalong be surprised that P.K. Sub-Bam is playing hockey. So we basically turned Newsy-Lalong into like a retroactive racist. Now he's a guy who's not on the cup anywhere because he's so old. Yeah. So I think that story is so dumb. Like, it's just the passage of time.

It's just the passage of time. We wrote a story about the passage of time. Should we make a, like, should we just scratch in Rocket Richard on the bottom of the cup, so it'll always be there? Well, why don't we just make the cup taller? Because there is a regulation on how tall the cup could be. Like skyscrapers in cities.

The fucking, like, yeah, that Toronto fucking board of the zoning board doesn't like. doesn't let the truck against... The cup cannot be as large as the CN Tower. We don't want planes flying into the Stanley Cup. Come on. Drake does his next album cover. He's sitting on the edge of the cup. That's great. Is Drake a Leafs fan now, or

is he still a fan of whatever is the best team possible? So hard to keep track. Wait, what was your... What was your... Did you hear things that would sound like... I did hear like a little bit of a buzz there. Like a... Hopefully everything's fine.

I just figured the takes here were so hot. The microphones are beginning to burn. No, listen, Cubs better than the NBA trophy. Stanley Cup playoffs better than the NBA playoffs. More drama, more potential for upsets. NBA final, always better than the Stanley Cup final, like on an annual basis. Always. Even like the blowout games are more fun than our games usually.

Because the problem is that the Stanley Cup final is everyone's exhausted. Everyone's, like, that game six was a bad game for a lot of reasons. But you could just tell, like, Carl Hegelan was the only guy who could skate in that game because everyone's just injured. Like when they put out the list of like, oh the Predators and today David Poilman to the podium and he announced all the team's injuries

it's like James Neal Dick fell off Mike Fisher lost left arm in second round like it's all these horrific injuries these guys played with and it's like

yeah great you're tough but it makes the product shitty Ryan Johansson's injury looks like a hang nail by the Paris and everything else went through Pecker Rennel legally died at the end of the third round

and they just resurrected him and put a Frankenstein brain in his head that's why he was so bad in the final UCSauros and Matisse Echolm We're handling him weaken at Bernie style the entire final. No one noticed.

They were dressed in whites. They blended in with the ice. Roman Yossi woke up at the end of the second round and his feet fell off. So they had to surgically reattach his feet. Oh, but LeBron's got cramps. Please like my sport. Colin Wilson actually only came back to the series because they gave him Kevin Fiala's other leg. It's crazy.

Right. Like at the time you're like Kevin Fiala's career might be over. Then by like the end of the final when you see all the injuries, it's like, why couldn't Kevin Fiala come back from that? I don't understand. just put a fucking rod in his leg you could have skated again that's the beauty of it man

like there's two ways to look at the Stanley Cup playoffs which is that the season's too long the playoffs are too long it's not great hockey at the end because all these guys are banged up or like the beauty of it is that it is a war of attrition like at the end you're rewarding the championship to the team that's survived it's giving it to a survivor

a survivor of the most grueling gauntland in all sports yeah because that's what I want from entertainment is to have everybody who's entertaining me be so miserable and tired they can't do their jobs to their highest ability. That's what I look for. Like, when I go see a movie,

I want to see people acting on, like, no sleep where they're just like, uh, forces with you. What? I'm your father. Oh. What?

You know, like the Revenant. Like the selling point of the Revenant was that all those guy, like Decapreo and all those people put themselves through hell in a wintry hellscape. Yeah.

To give you entertainment. And that's why people like the movie. Don't care. They're like, oh my God, look at these. Oh, they put themselves through hell. Like,

they got attacked by a real bear. Like Christian Bail lost 90 pounds for this role. Well, why don't you just get a guy who was already sized to do it if that was It's the fucking case. It's sizest, really. Like, they didn't go hire a real skinny guy

already for the machinist. You're right. Charo Leto won for Dallas Buyers Club, right? Yeah. Yeah, he should have. He was getting that. Yeah. Didn't win for Suicide Squad, though, for some reason.

But you're against Super Teams. You don't like the idea of Super Teams for hockey? I love the idea. I don't know how they would do it, but I love it. I feel like I feel like super teams are an interesting concept in the NBA because individual players affect those games so much.

But I do appreciate more in the NHL the concept of team building. Like the concept of like... You love the long haul of everything. Well, I like, you know, like we make fun of Jim Ruther for being a doughty old fool who hands out where there's originals. Or Mrs. Butterworth. There doesn't to be said for the fact that like, you know, with the help of what Ray Shiro gave that farm system, you know, the fact that the fact that the,

the penguins were able to win back-to-back cups, not with a roster dotted with superstars, but with four guys making 44% of the cap and then them having to fill in the blanks around it. And doing a brilliant job doing it. You know, like Ron Hainzee. We all made fun of that. He wound up being a really solid player for them in the playoffs.

I didn't make fun of that. I like the idea that they just went out and just got volume. They were like Mark Strait and Ron Ainsie. Somebody will work out of this. A bunch of kids making less than $750,000. filled out the roster, they won a cup with them, including Gensel was one of them. Like the idea that you had, you had to do, I guess this is what I'm trying to say is that I hated RBI baseball, but I loved baseball stars.

Because baseball stars was more, that was the Japanese one with the women's team and the, the ghastly monsters. That was the one where you could put in, what is a wren and then answer a bird and all your stuff gets really put to. I don't remember that at all. I want to do that. Yeah, it's a great game. What is a Wren?

Is that really a thing? That was the question. And then you put a bird, and then it gave you a team that was sort of pumped up. But that's neither here nor there. My point is that I always enjoyed the games that allowed you to be more managerial than, like, Roger Clemens, pitching to Andre Dawson. Wow! Like, I could give a shit about RBI baseball. I was a baseball star's guy.

Here's my thing. The NHTSO regular season stinks, right? You would agree. It's pointless. It's a long, and they don't make it any better by making the playoff seating so dumb. Right. But the overall regular season, you know, whether it's. an 8C and getting to the final, or it's just, you know, it's all about your matchups.

Like, the regular season is pretty pointless, the point system and all that. Right. Now, with the Golden State Warriors getting Kevin Durant, we were all sitting around waiting for Warriors Cavs part three all season, right? Right. So I would rather have, if the payoff at the end of a bad regular season is three years in a row of two super duper awesome teams, you know, whatever the NHL version is of like LeBron and Kyrie against Durant, Clay, and Steph and Draymond, if you can do that

version in the NHL, I would, I would take that every time. If it was like the Gretzky Kings against the

Mario Penguins, like every season in like the early 90s, that would be, that would be fine. But like, plus Mario has Brett Hall. Like,

that would be amazing. I would fucking... And, and give him Hull? But even on those super team... Even the closest thing we had to a super team in recent memory,

which was the Red Wings. That one, you know, was it, 2000, I guess it was. It had Hall and Robotiles. But they still, it was still a team that won because they had the grind line and role players and that whole thing. They won because they had all the hallfamers.

It helped. But there wasn't, but there wasn't like a foil. There wasn't like a team in the east that could, right there in the West back then. Yeah, I know. I lose track it. Like, Detroit, Colorado. But in order to get there, the only way that the NHL would ever get there is contraction. Either that or you blow up the salary cap and make it a luxury tax, which is the other way that you would possibly be able to get there.

Yeah, like to do it now, you would need to have a bunch of Zach. who are like, I'm only going to take a one-year deal for arbitration my last year. There's a third way to do it, which would be to abolish the draft and go back to a territorial method of distributing players, make every young player a free agent, they get to choose where they want to go, or geographically seed them places, which is me just basically trying to get Austin Matthews to his rightful place in Arizona. But no, but I mean, like, if you wanted to really make super teams, one way to do it would be to like have every young player be a free agent.

And if Montreal says, get rid of the... the salary cap, make every young player a free agent, and Jeff Moulson's like, here's a billion dollars for you, you know, Austin Matthews or Connor McDavid, come play for the Habs. Yeah, it's hard. It's just, there's too many guys you've got to sign. And you're never going to get a thing where you're

going to have them, I'm going to take my talents to South Beach in the, in the NHL because, like, the only time it actually happened, I think was when Korea and Salani decided they want to be a package deal and go someplace. Like, that was probably the last time we saw that, right? I believe you're forgetting, oh, fuck, who was it? I believe you're forgetting the

package deal of Mikhail Grabowski and Nikolai Kulman. And Nikolai Kulman. Okay, granted it. Okay, that was... I'm taking my talents to Long Island. Technically, the last time we saw it was that. Technically. I can't believe they got away with it, too. And they got a good deal.

Fucking Gart Snow. But in the NBA, you know if you go play with your boys, and three of the starting five spots on the floor are you and two other superstars, as was the case in Miami. Like, you're going to win. Yeah, it's easier. It's obviously easier to do in the NBA. You would probably need...

Like, in the NBA, you need three guys. if you have like the Warriors and you have a fourth guy that's amazing but in the NHL you would probably need who's the nine forwards and four D 13 guys per team in the NHL that you think could go someplace from their team you're another team simply to get them a cup

they've not been able to what would it be Ovechkin would Ovechkin be the Durant? Not anymore maybe like five six years ago he's not MVP level anymore oh shit I know what Durant is who Eric Carlson yeah he's never winning a cup in Ottawa

No, he should not resign there. Carrie Price maybe a little bit too. Maybe Carrie Price needs to get himself. There you go. Eric Carlson and Carrie Price and Tavares. Okay, okay, wait, we're on this something here. Oh, my. Wheels are a trend.

Tavares and Carrie Price are free agents after the season. And I think Carlson is after the following season, right? One second to double check these facts that you're spitting out here? They're all. Yeah, these are all true. Don't even look them out. They're fine. You are in fact hungover?

I just want to make sure we're on that one. Only mildly. I had a little smoothie on the way here. I got some vitamin. to me. Eric Carlson is up after 2019, as is Drew Doughty, by the way. Okay, well, he can go plan.

He can be on your team. I want to get the good players. I'm on the Cavs. I have the Cavs. You're the Caps. Drew Doughty will be your Kevin Love, who's good at times, but you'd rather have anybody else on the Warriors.

Okay, so John Tavar, they're all in bad spots, too. Like, the Islanders aren't winning a cup. Montreal's not going to win the Cup. I was not going to win the Cup. Those three guys, you know, they get together in Vegas or... Who's the first?

fourth one. Who's the other guy that they're like, we want to go play here because he's here? Oh, like, the guy, like the Magnet guy? So Tavares is, who's he friends with? Who are his people? Well, Carrie Price, K. Price is from British Columbia. Oh, don't make them go there. There's nothing, there's nothing there for those guys. And they go to Edmonton. Oh, because Conne McDavid's going to sign a huge thing. Oh, it would have to be a place where like, no, they need them. it's a super team oh you're saying

oh so you're saying it's not them creating a super team it's them going to a place where the groundwork is already laid for there to be a super team it's too hard to just start from scratch like what if they all went to Vegas Carrie Price likes the rodeo

Dallas oh fuck Dallas they do have Sagan and they have Ben Tavaris Sagan Ben Klingberg Is that enough to get you there To start to create the super team Klingberg and Carlson

But like But like imagine if like everyone Just wants to go hang out in Vegas Because it's Vegas You just want this to happen in Vegas Because you could do it there Because if like Vegas will be really shitty this year Even though somebody else wrote a thing

About how Vegas is gonna compete next year It wasn't me although I told you they're gonna be playoffs I know you're on that you're on that crazy train Like next year Carrie Price signs for five years and $8 million. John Tavares signs for seven years and 14 million. You get all these superstars there, super low cap,

and then Vegas just explodes in year three when our cross and shows up. Boom. Super team. But then we got to get a second super team to make it worth it in the East. Exactly. Good luck with that.

Fucking too hard. Two quick things before we get to your mail because I think we only have the studio for a little bit longer. I'm exhausted. Dan Gerardi gets bought out. Shocker, but a great shocker. That's what she said.

Oh, geez. By the way, that's $3.6 million two of those years that buy out. That's a lot of money. That's a lot of money, but it just goes to show you that at least, at least someone in that organization parked loyalty and parked the heartfelt sentiments that you don't want to get rid of a good soldier and looked at the numbers and said he's fucking terrible. He's been bad for a while. I saw somebody tweet that was like he was a key cog in the 2014 cup run.

He played a lot. Yeah, he really did. I don't know if he was a key cog, though. But like I said earlier today, like looking very much forward to that one year, one million dollar contract he takes with the Chicago Blackhawks. Oh, no. Brad Richards deal. Stan Bowman won't do that.

Brad Richards can still put up 50 points when he was done. He's totally going there. No one's going to sign down. It's going to be great. Do you think anyone signed it? I don't think anyone signs it. Chicago Blackhawks one year, $1 million. For real?

Tell you. I don't think anybody's signed. Anybody's on defense. He's going to be the next Michael Roosevelt. He's not going to, he's got a family. He's got at least one kid. I think he's got two kids. He's not going to uproot his family for a one-year deal somewhere else.

I think he's done. So that happened. And then the latest from Ray Ferraro today, talking about the Vegas Golden Knights, He says, I was told Flurry is staying in Vegas when he eventually gets drafted there. Would that shock you? I've been on the train lately about an idea that I had. And I don't know if it's a good one or a bad one, but it's an idea nonetheless.

What about the fact that Jason Botterill did not draft Robin Lanner? Doesn't give a shit about Robin Lanner. It was a bad deal in retrospect, giving up a one for him. So we're now sending more goalies to Vegas. Every goal he's going to Vegas. I don't care what happens to Robin Lanner. I do care that Mark Andre Fleury was a penguin. Jason Botterl was a penguin's assistant general manager.

And he would shore up that position, lickety split for the Buffalo Sabres, were they to acquire him from the Vegas Golden Knights. Yeah. It was one of the places I hypothesized. I've used that weren't a lot. When I'm hung over, I use big words incorrectly. That's my movement. Yeah. And I thought about Flurry with anti-disestablishmentarianism.

The tangential effects of the corollary. No, yeah, that would make a lot. But they just signed Linus Olmark, too. Like, I think they're kind of set. The expansion draft protected lists will come out on Sunday. Happy Father's Day, everyone. Thanks, NHL. What, uh, anything you expect that you would think would be a surprise?

I'm expecting James Neal's name to not be protected by the predators. If it comes down to Cali Yarncrock and James Neal. Yeah, and it's got to be Neal. It gets exposed. Why do they call them Callie Yarncroke instead of, Cali thread ribbage. Jesus Christ. What's happening, isn't it?

It's all falling apart. I think he'll be exposed. Dustin Brown will be there. I think in one of those trade pick. Like I saw there was somebody reported a thing where it was some dude who had a really shitty contract and they were going to package that guy in a first round pick in Vegas was going to take that. I forget who it was.

But it wasn't Dustin Brown, but I was like, that's what the king should do. They should be like, we're still kind of in win now mode. take Dustin Brown, take our first round pick, because it's probably like the 14th pick, 15th, 16th pick. To me, that's the most fascinating thing like about Vegas is just what the draft pick bounty is going to end up being for them from all these teams that have to cut side deals. Like, is Anaheim going to give them their first round pick

for the next 10 years to get rid of the pickle that they're in? To take Piazza? Ah, God, it was so great because like the series ended Sunday and I was like, this is nice. Like, I'm going to have a nice light week. I got a bunch of work done Sunday. I'm going to have a nice free week. And then I realized, like, the lists come out on Sunday.

The lists come out. I'm going to be fucking grinding out copy on a fucking Sunday again. God, I hate this job. I got to do something else for a living. Do you think that Mike Smith gets exposed by the, by the Arizona Coyotes? You know what? I haven't been looking at the lists because I've been waiting for them to be officially protected lists because, like, I don't know. Like James Neal, for instance, everyone's like, yeah, man, can't lose James Neal.

Why? Yeah, you could totally lose. He's a very expensive winger who, I mean, he's, Fine, but like, you'd rather have that money for another center, I think. The only guys that I can guarantee are going to Vegas. I'll put my, the Greg Wosinski stamp guarantee on this right now. Mark Andre Fleury. Do you think he's in a stay, though?

I don't think he's in a stay, though. I don't think he's in the draft. Calvin DeHan, because McPhee scouted the Islanders, and I think they can't protect him. So I think that he's a good pickup. And the third guy I would guarantee is Thomas Placanic from the Canadian. You need to have somebody up front. And, you know, finding centers that are not completely terrible is a very tough gig. And I think that if nothing else, they'll grab them and then flip them. See, I would draft, or, yeah, I would draft Flurry.

I would draft Jimmy Howard, and I would flip those guys to some other teams because I think they have value. Their contracts aren't very long. Yeah, like that Jimmy Howard pick. Like, Jimmy Howard, like, I would seriously, every, like, I think Matt Moulson would be a guy who Vegas might take because he's very expensive and he can put up. put it on a first line, he'll score 25 goals next year for Vegas. Dustin Brown is obviously one. Yeah, every goalie seems like they're perfect for Vegas. Whether they're like bad and old and expensive or young and cheap.

The only way Dustin Brown's getting drafted is if they sweeten the pot, right? Yeah, like they need to like give them. They have to get something for them or else they're not going to take that money off there. Give them a little something. Like the, who is the Russian guy in the Kings who was there, for the cup. He was like a bit player, but then he went to the Devils. I was trying to think of this the other day. Oh, I don't remember that. He was like a little tiny dude. He came to the Devils and the next year. Oh, Jesus. What, 2012 cup? Yeah, I think and then he showed up in the

Jersey and he was pretty good. I think he's in the cage hall now, but it doesn't matter. It's a completely fucking non-related thing. Um, yeah, I cannot wait to see. So the protected list come out Sunday and then I'm going to like churn out a bunch of different like draft ideas based on like Oh, Lockedianoff. Lockedianoff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a nice little guy. I liked him.

He's a nice guy to talk to him. Apropos of nothing. Absolutely nothing. I was just thinking of like a prospect that could attach and for some reason locktyanov came into my head even though. As he often does. All right. Like take Dustin Brown.

We'll give you locked. It's time for a favorite here on Buck Soup. It's time for the Buck Soup mailbag. Let's do it. First question is, which NHL coach would make the best. best Uber driver. I don't know what that means. And which one would be the worst?

I imagine they mean someone who's dependable, but also will talk your ear off, maybe give you a bottle of water. I don't want to have my ear talked off in the fucking Uber. I want to just go over it. I never want to talk to people. So to me, it's got to be a guy who doesn't want to talk. Mike Sullivan. By the way, I still can't believe Mike Sullivan studied under John Tortorella for all those years,

and then it turns out to be the best coach in the world. Definitely Mike Sullivan would be my pick for the best Uber driver. My pick for the worst, obviously, Randy Carlisle. I'll say Babs. Babs wouldn't talk unless he had something to say that was interesting. Sullivan will get you there by the second it tells you that you're going to be there on Google Maps. And Randy Carlyle would be like, oh, didn't know it was a one-way street, you know, kind of thing. Elaine Vigno.

Elaine Vino wouldn't say a goddamn word the entire car, right? You'd have the PR guys in the shotgun seat, like, just like tapping his watch. So he's like, just get there faster and don't talk. As opposed to some other guys in Columbus that he'd be like, can't move you to put your belt on. Can't move until you don't put your belt on. I had one of those Uber drivers once. And like, he didn't say anything. I got in the back of the fucking SUV. I'm sitting there. And I'm like, hey, how's it going? He doesn't respond to me. I'm sitting there. And like, he's looking in the mirror. And I'm like, oh, do you need to know where to go?

He's like, no, I need you to put your seatbelt on. Like, all sarcasticly. Like, I'm supposed to read his mind. That was my cruck, by the way. He asked a question. All hustle no hands wants to know. A guy on my beer league team complained guardians had too much drax. Hate him or pity him. Dude, fucking Drax is the best. Dax was the MVP of the movie. You kidding me? Yeah.

Boy, this movie had too many laughs and fun moments. Yeah. Oh, right. Less funny, more parental strife. Yeah. I wish there was more of Kurt Russell talking about how he killed someone's mom with a tumor. I wish there was more of that. Spoilers.

That movie's been out for a month and a half now. Such an uplift. Now, is that more uplifting than Wonder Woman? Can I take my kid to Guardians? Yeah. Guardian is fine because bright and shiny. Yeah, like the tumor was glowing and stuff, so it was cute. But, yeah, apparently Wonder Woman gets a little dark.

Zach T wants to know, F. Mary Kill, Kill, pancakes, French Toast Waffles. Kill Waffles. I like it so far. Who do I want to spend the rest of my life with? Fuck French toast, marry pancakes. You and I are sympathico. Yeah. The fluffy golden goodness of a pancake next to you for the rest of your life.

I see no reason why that wouldn't be something you. be down with. A little French toast in the side once in a while. When the pancakes are on the road. Fuck up a French toast. Just, man, that, like, thick bread, too. And she's like, oh, ha, I am. More than me.

Oh, pour some more syrup on me. Just like a vet from Clue. Yeah, she was great. Clantastic wants to know, Celebrity fans suddenly declaring their loyalty and grabbing exposure for supporting, quote, unquote, their team, a good thing or a bad thing? It's corny.

It's a good thing. Like, fucking Rihanna was at game one of the NBA final. Like, like, it was just like a thing on the broadcast for 40 seconds, and then it was just like, they mentioned it one more time and that was it. Like, if Adam, like Adam Duritz was at Game 5, if Adam, you didn't know that. You didn't know he was a fan. I didn't know he was, I knew it was him.

By the way, that got retweeted way more than I thought because everyone was, I think everyone thought it wasn't Adam Duritz. It was just the guy that looked like him. But like if Adam Duritz was at game four of, of Preds, Penguins, like he would have been on the NBC intermission show. Like, that's the level. He looked like his hair has gotten to the point where he looks like an evil or sideshow Bob.

Okay, timeout for a second, real quick, because I know we got to get the fuck out of here, but there were two types of responses to that tweet. One was, like, song parody, counting crows jokes, which got all day for that. And everyone else was like, boy, he looks like shit. He's 50 fucking two years old. He's been the frontman for a rock and roll band for 20 years.

He's got all of his hair. And he was never, like, in shape in the 90s. Like, he looks pretty fucking good. He was always kind of a chubberoo guy, but like the idea that, like, a guy who's 50-something years old, and his hair looks like one of the, of the fry guys from McDonald's. I'm 39 right now.

If you told me right now, Dave, that's how you're going to look at 52. I sign the paperwork immediately. Celebrity fans are fine. I think that everybody needs an entry point into hockey. And if you become a hockey fan because Luke Bryan was wearing a smash hat. No, that's fine. That's great. Oh, that's fine.

I just don't need to see them at every single Stanley Cup final playoff game or whatever. Kyle McNevin wants to know yet another breakfast question for you guys. How are rank the different ways to prepare eggs? I give you a top three. I mean, there's a billion ways to prepare eggs. I mean, I'm a scramble guy. Like, I don't really enjoy many other egg preparation styles. Like, anything like Sunny Side Up, anything where there's egg jizz flowing out of the egg?

I don't want that on my... Sunny Side Up, number one. Omelet number two, scramble number three. Oh, yeah, omelet and scrambled. Ruby's got a way of preparing scrambled eggs where she, like, slowly cooks them for, like, a long time and puts, like, herbs and shit and it's really good. Oh, herbs? Oh, I think you meant like she Like, yeah, she makes

She makes pot eggs Little buzzed on Saturday morning maybe Yeah, a little Scooby-Doo and some weed eggs Mm-hmm, yeah Nico or Nolan The Bobaduke of Earl wants to know Nico obviously is the answer Is it? The answer is they're going to trade the pick

I was reading something today about the doubles Looking at the defenseman all year Not realizing they might actually win the lottery And so then they win the lottery and you're like We don't know nothing about these people. Classic Ray Sherro. Nolan Patrick's injury kind of injury history kind of worries me a little bit.

I feel like he might be a guy that like they draft and it's like, oh, holy shit, you know what? His grain, we should have known his groin was going to explode at some point. I disagree. Like, that's, there was some dude in a baseball game other day who had Tommy John when he was like 14 and he, I forget who it was, but he's pretty good. Carlos Corray on the Astros broke his leg in the minors. He's fucking the best hard stopping base.

There's, when you get hurt when you're 16, like, you're, like, you're, your fucking body is fine 20 minutes later. It's not a big deal. But they should trade down if they want a defenseman, take a defenseman, trade the pick and go down like two spots. I don't trade it for like Cody Eakin, you know? Like, don't do that. Any real threat of that.

Spoiler. Although, yeah, it would be shocking to see them trade to one to ducks for like Sammy Vatin and something. Well, that's different. That would be interesting. They shouldn't do that. Wayne LaFleur wants to know, why are there goaltenders and net minors, but no goalminders or net tenders. Why do you park on a driveway?

What is the deal with goal tenders? I mean, are they goals? Are they tenders? What's the deal with the cages? They protect the cage and they wear one over their face. What is the deal? What is the deal? I don't know. I don't know the answer to that question.

Wayne. All right. Stop doing drugs. Indeed. All right. So that is the end of the podcast for this week. Oh, we're done. I have no idea what we're doing next week.

because I'm going to be traveling. I'm going to be in... I have to go to Vegas for the things. And then I'm going to be in Chicago for the draft. So it might be another one of those... Oh, yeah, you're going to Toronto to do a fucking puck-tock-tock-five, huh? No, no, next week is the expansion draft. And then it's the awards, and then it's the real draft.

So it may be one of these things where Greg interviews an amazing guest, and then it takes a turn into a weird, homophobic, Putin-praising festival before we talk about bears again. I'm here with Eric Stone Street of Modern Family. And he's just talking about the Kings for the first 15 minutes. And you fast forward to like minute 22. And it's like, so I just think the Holocaust never happened. This is about right.

So it might be one of those remote ones again. And then the following week is the live podcast on the 26th. We're you and I. People have been asking like if you come to the show, is it just going to be the podcast? No, we're going to do the podcast for like 90 minutes. Like it will all be on the podcast, but we're going to do other stuff that won't be on the podcast. Right. So like, let's say you're not... So then your first statement is

false. No, no, no. No, like it's, we're doing the podcast. If you're not, if you're not there, you're going to get about 90 minutes of the show. Yeah, like, when it pops into your feed, it will be what we did there. And then the other 30 minutes is going to be for the people that are in the room. That's going to be like a Q&A, we'll do some stuff. Yeah. Have you ever been to the venue? I don't even know what the venue is. I have never

been to the venue. I've never been to there or or to the Bell House, which is where other podcasts do their things and and maybe we'll do it there too. They're like sister venues, I think. Sisters are venue in it. Venue and...

I don't know. But like we're gonna get, like, you know, some audience participation. It'll be good. We have, we have one guest. For sure. But we don't even have to tell you

because you already bought the fucking tickets. Yeah. So like we don't need to put that worm on the hook for you. Yeah, like you're already there. You're already there. It can be anybody. Here's Vladimir

to defend everything. Here's a professor of economics from Ford of University to talk about trickle down. First of all, the economy today is not fueled by tax cuts. Socialism is bad. Who here has filled out a W-4?

Let's talk about the ins and outs of the W-4. Now, when you're calculating your estimated quarterly payments... All right, but we have one guest, we're working on another guest. They're both going to be great. And yeah, so thanks for everybody for... coming. And so that's the plan. Podcast next week of some sort after that live podcast and after that more podcasts and then at some point we'll fuck off for the summer a little bit probably. Yeah, we should skip the podcast next week. Let's just skip it until we do the live one.

People demand it. I guess we have advertisers. Yeah, we do. And also like there probably is going to be like an expansion draft to talk about it. We could do an entire Vegas episode if we wanted to. Maybe I'll just go to Vegas. When is the, when is this shit in Vegas again? It's a beginning on like Tuesday. They're going to unveil the New Jersey's and then. The 20th. Yeah. Look at the flights. We are all about planning.

All right, everybody. Thanks for listening. Thanks for all your love. If you dig the podcast, drop a review in iTunes and tell us how much you like the show. Don't be like the guy who gave us three stars because he said we didn't have enough three star reviews. That's not being helpful. You're an ass off. You're not helping.

You dipshit. Did that really happen? I never checked that. It definitely happened. When I check the reviews, you have to scroll down and get to the new ones. It takes too long. Like, I have no free time for that, man. It definitely happens.

All right. I'm Greg Wischinski, Vy Sports Puck Daddy Blog. You buy my book, take your eye off the puck. And also our book, The 100 Greatest Players in NHL History and other stuff,

both available on Amazon. You can listen to my other podcast, Merrick versus Wachinsky. We had one this week. Jeff was actually there. It was very exciting. And that's about it. Well, if you're in Vegas or Chicago,

make sure you say hi. Thank you for all the pucks of people that said hi in Nashville. A lot of people came over, so they loved the podcast. I had somebody come up to me in the hallway of Bridgestone Arena and say, you are my second favorite person on Puck Soup, to which I then said, obviously, number one, is all of the guests.

And he said, no, it's actually Dave Losa. Yeah, that's a bad comeback. You should have just taken the L. That's why I'm the second best person on the podcast, apparently. Hey, here's Dave Loso. You're a silver medalist. We got to get out of here. I never have time for any sort of bits at the end of the show anywhere

because we start late because Greg gets really late. You know you do I got paraded for that today Because I tried to tell him That we were taping from 2 to 4 I got there like 155 159 Yeah and and he came downstairs

He gave me a lecture about When you if you have to go to work at 9 You should get there at 845 Because that's what productive He texts me and he goes Let's shoot for 130 I'm like okay Then the next text is I've got the room

booked from 2 to 4 So does that tell you that you should get there at 1 30 Or that you should get there at 2? Like I texted him in 145 I'm like I'm here And he's like dude I haven't even left my apartment yet at 145. To the naked eye,

no, the eye that has brains, yes. Yeah, so the only thing I will tell people at the end of the show is stop calling songs bangers. Just call them good songs. What about, what about Miley Cyrus's song, Bangers? Can you call that a banger? You can call that,

you can say banger is a good song. It's a weird, it's the only weird millennial thing I don't get is this propensity to not call songs. I think it's like a male toughness thing. Like you just can't say, man, I love Taylor Swift's songs. You have to say, Taylor Swift songs are bangers. I don't get it.

Does that upset you as a fan of of Lancaster City that people are using the word? It's Leicester City, not Leicester. You bloody wanker. People are applying the word bangers, but not adding mash. It's bangers and mash. It's Taylor Swift's songs bangers and mash, Governor. All right, I'm done. Let's go.

All right, everybody. Bye. Thank you.