Puck Soup - Playoffs, Suspensions and More

Episode Date: May 5, 2016

Greg and Dave discuss NHL suspensions, Stanley Cup Playoffs, happy Leafs fans and fired coaches. Also, Dave presents GAME OF THRONES 101 to Greg and the boys recreate a Pierre McGuire/Tony X. interview.

Today's episode of Puck Soup is sponsored by Seat Geek. Have you ever been frustrated trying to buy tickets online? Most sites make it complicated. And then they try to sneak in huge fees at checkout. That's why you need to try Seat Geek. They made it easier than ever to buy and sell sports and concert tickets. Dave, we're in New York City. Everybody buys freaking tickets so quickly you can't get the good seats.

What do you go to get good seats? I go to Seat Geek because that's where you get seats if you're a geek and I'm a geek. And you need seats. And I need seats. Indeed. If you listen to Puck Soup, you can get a $20 rebate off your first Seat Geek purchase. Here's how you do it. You download the free Seat Geek app.

You go to settings. You click add a promo code. You enter the promo code S-O-U-P for the Spelling Challenge. Soup. Soup. Seat Geek will send you $20 after you've made your first ticket purchase. Download the free Seat Geek app. Enter the promo code Soup today for your rebate.

And enjoy the show. Now entering nerdist.com Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slapshots and goons We've got sportly commentary To what if you commute We also cover movies, TV shows, eats and tools It's your weekly bowl of hockey and nonsense Part 2

I'm Greg Wyshinsky of Yahoo Sports Puck Daddy blog I'm Dave Lozo of a whole bunch of places including Vice which may now be ESPN. Is that right? You see that? There's like a vice ESPN partnership now. Oh, my God. Yeah, I don't think I'm part of it in any way, shape, or form.

I'm just hoping, like, I don't get an email that says, yeah, you gotta stop making that stupid joke on Twitter where you say, I'm ESPN. You can't do that anymore. So that's my only concern. Like, there's no money in it for me. There's no fame. There's no extra.

It's just I'm concerned about my dumb joke. That's all I care about. And when they lay you off, they'll say, have a very vice day. I'm Greg Wosinski. SPAN. You're Dave Lozo. You don't longer work.

Free SPN. And you're in Puck Soup. Dave, it's been an extraordinarily violent and vicious playoff so far. The Department of Players' Safety might as well get the Kahn-Smith trophy for being the MVP. You gave it to Tony X yesterday.

Now you're giving it to Player's Safety. You know what? You media types are you hedging and your foot flopping on your awards. Oh, more on Tony X blues superfan later in the podcast. Here's a thing, right? Our good friend, Pierre LeBron, ESPN, wrote a story about how he felt like the Brooks Orpick hit on Ole Mata, which earned a three-game suspension for the Capitals, and the Chris LaTang hit on Marcus Johansson that earned Latangle one game suspension for the Pittsburgh Penguins,

that these incidents were marring a classic series. And with all due respect to Pierre LeBron, what horseshit! It is that stuff that makes for a classic series. We'll go back to the single greatest Stanley Cup final I've ever witnessed. Vancouver, Boston. The hockey was terrible. Everything around the hockey, flashpoints of violence, a stretcher. What was it?

Six games for Rome. What did he get? Four games. Four games for Rome, but like eight regular six games and four playoff games. All of it, the trash talk with Luongo and Thomas, all of it around it made it the single most epic, dramatic, operatic. Stanley Cup final playoff series I've ever seen. And in the fact that we had these two incidences already between the capitals of Penguins as we do the show before game four.

Right. Someone's going to die tonight for sure. We're all, it's a great. That's what's made it great. That's what's made it absolutely great. I don't know. I think it's a little too early to be calling this. It's a great series. It's only been three games. All three games have been pretty good. Game three wasn't really that great. It was just had a really good last two minutes. I don't think the hits are marring it. I don't think the hits are helping it. Hold on, but like in contrast with the rest of the playoffs right now in the semifinals,

this is the only series anybody's talking about. Oh, well, that doesn't mean it's the only good series. I think all four series in the second round have been fantastic. St. Louis is kind of, I think, pulling away. But, I mean, Chicago, St. Louis is going to be better than any series it gets played this year. So the idea that the hits are marring the series, I mean, to me it's not the hits. It's the constant talking about the hits. Like, you know, people, you know, they see these hits.

they show up to their place to do a podcast and what's the first thing they talk about? They sit there and waste all their listeners' time with talk about hits. I mean, why would people who have a podcast and have a voice to talk about anything in the world waste anyone's time with a breakdown and argument about hits

over the course of two games? It's just insane. I can't stand people that do that. But anyway, the hits in the series. No, before we get to that, but what you're essentially making is the Armageddon Deep Impact argument. Deep Impact, was a bad movie.

Quieter movie. bad movie. An interesting movie. Not a good movie. Ask some interesting questions. A thoughtful movie. Super boring. Uh-huh. Did not have Animal Cracker Seduction scene.

No. Nope. Did not have a crazedee, Bichemi, talking about an asteroid or a comet being Dr. Seuss' worst nightmare. No limping Billy Bob Thornton. No leaving. Yeah. Not a jet. Had none of it.

I didn't have that great scene where all the guys talk about what they want from the government to do the mission. Right. like I never want to pay taxes ever. Strip club scene. Strip club scene. Right, right. Like, Armageddon had a strip club scene, and Deep Impact had a scene where Taya Leone and her father die on the beach as a way it fits them.

Like, what movie would you rather watch over and over again? Spoiler. Just saying. But Deep Impact did have its virtue. I mean, it did have Morgan Freeman as the first black president. I mean, like, Morgan Freeman's cool in it, but like, I don't know. Like, the whole, there's like a 20-minute segment of Deep Impact where there's, like, I don't know what the word is for it.

Like, a discussion about who gets to ask the first question about the end of the world. It was the – Taye Leone is the new, young, pretty, you know, journalist, and there's, like, the veteran journalist and just like, sit down, you're old now. You can't ask you quite – and, like, that was like a crucial 10-minute part of the movie. You just hit the perfect – that's the perfect thing. In Armageddon, when they make a deal with the government, they ask for strip clubs and to pay no taxes anymore. Right.

When Teia Leone makes a deal with the government, so she can ask the first question in a press conference. I want to look really cool in front of my peers who are all going to die in nine days. Yeah, I want to – I want to trod the trade. that Helen Thomas blazed 70 years ago, and that's my trade-off. Like that the best is like, Morgan Freeman's like, don't push it. And then, like, I think he hears the request. And he's like, I don't care. We're all going to be dead soon.

You can do what you want. Mr. President, what's the ELE project? Well, it was about that time I realized that a comet was going to hit the earth. Hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies. The earth's not good, so we're all going to die. Next question.

Follow up? Oh, geez. lady, we get it. You're a good journalist. We're all going to be dead to you. We're not going down without a fight. Today, we celebrate our Deep Impact Day. Barf! Far from you. By the way, I've been waiting the entire Dallas St. Louis series to make a Dallas Lone Star and a St. Louis Schwartz joke that I just can't quite get together. I don't know what it's there. There's something there. Like Jada Schwartz has to score like in the Lone Star State to win a game and then like maybe something happens.

but don't think I'm not trying to think of it. Somebody jams the puck in on Brian Elliott, and he's like, jam! There's only one man. It would jam it in on me. Lone strong. We got the hits. Sweeps?

Ploor. The creeps. My point is that some series are quieter, like deep impact and more considerate, like deep impact. And some series are headshots and suspensions and Animal Cracker's seduction scenes. I just, I, here's what drives me nuts. Like, like, player safety. So the Brooks Orpick hit was bad and should be three games.

Right. The Crystal Tang hit. So back in the Colin Campbell Wheel of Justice Days, people would tell me, oh, man, Coles, you know, Coli gets affected by the media. It goes into his decisions if they're complaining about stuff. And I was always like, really? That's a reason. That's insane. He's Colin Campbell.

He's never going to get fired. This is before the Gregory Campbell stuff. I was like, he's never going to, why does he care what anybody thinks? Like, no, he does. And then Shanny came in. And, like, Shanny gave no. fucks. He was just dropping eight gamers on people, didn't care, and it was

like, wow, this was great. And I feel like Stefan Cantal just, he just doesn't care. He doesn't care. He's just like, I don't really want this job. It pays six figures. I got my lieutenants. I got Damien and Patrick lifting all the heavy weights for me. I got the people in the room cutting videos. They email

me a link. I look at it, and I'm like, whatever. And now Barry Trots sort of plays the whole, Penguins get all the brakes cards, and Latang gets suspended. And I think you should have been, but like, based on the precedent that player safety sets on its own, that how is that any different than the Brian Boyle hit last night? How is it any different than Thomas Hickey on Cedric Potquette? The only difference is the coach really bitched the day before about it. Yeah, how's it any

different than guy? And it just feels like it's a wheel of justice error all over. A guy dropping a William Regal knee to the back of some other player's head in an effort to, quote, avoid him. Oh, the bathroom pilot? As was what happened to LaTang later in the game. Like, it's just, it's just like, I don't even think the Brian Boyle hit was super It wasn't as late as Latang's, I don't think. I didn't measure it with the frames and all that. But, I mean... But that's the crazy part about the NHL.

Like, it's so funny which hits, you know, enter the zeitgeist. Yeah. It's like any... You could take any five incidences in any game, and you can say... And we could rally around them and replay the GIF from my regular face and get outraged about it. But it's just certain ones seem to rise up. And then they overshadow everything else. Like, if it were not for the Latang play, we might be looking at a knee to the back of his head and saying...

It all depends. What is his horse shit? It all depends on what people get pissed about. And that's why it feels like the Colin Campbell era again is where it's just like, like the peer Mark Bouchard, remember that? Or the preseason game? Like he went to, he got his stick in a bad place and he high stick the guy and got a bunch of games. I remember like at the time thinking like, that's pretty, you know, irresponsible. But I don't remember there, I don't think people would have been outraged if he got no games.

That was Shanahan's mistake. Like that in talking to Shanney, he won't admit it. But I think he knows that there are certain times when they gave out suspensions that they shouldn't have given out or maybe gave out harsher ones than they should have. To draw a line to what you just said, Colin Campbell is the most old school of old school guy. Right, I'm pretty sure if you cut him, he'd bleed pucks. That's not healthy. That's not good for the heart.

Wow, you should get that check. It is a very unique cholesterol problem for hockey people. Are they like regular size? Are they like tiny little bucks? No. Mini benders on Futurama when you got real tiny. You don't watch Futurama. No, they're like keychain size pucks when you buy at the store.

Okay, that's helpful. So anyways, so he was very old school, and I think he just saw that some of these plays, and he was the discipline guy during the dawn of social media, and he would see people rising up and having a voice and saying, this is horse shit, how could you allow this? This is a circus league, and it would be like, oh, but it's a good hockey hit. You never played the hockey game like me and my son Gregory did. And then so he got shaked out of that job because of trying to influence referees to call penalties favorably for his son. And then Shanahan came in, and God bless him. He actually cared. He actually cared about trying to clean up the game and get rid of hits that cause concussions.

Yes. And put people on. He looked at the game and he said to himself, I cannot but think that maybe, you know, four stretches a week isn't good for the old public relations. And it is a great point. That's a great point. So he kind of cleared up the game and handed out these big lengthy suspensions. And it was as much about education as it was about punishment.

Now, I think we've... Right. That's how it should always be. Right. But I don't think... We don't do that anymore, right? We don't. I got away from it. That's what drives me.

And, like, again, I just feel like, Stefan Kintal is sort of like, what do I have to do to minimize the amount of times I get woken up at 10.30 at night by someone who works for me because I don't want to be bothered with it. And, again, and the other thing, too, is, like, not everything rises to that level, like, the Jueen, like, the Hickey hit on Drew N, like, it's weird that, like, now we're, like, should that be a suspension? Like, why? Like, that's, it was, it was an, I would deem that hit unnecessary. But again, I thought it was unavoidable and it was clean and it was mostly Joanne's fault for feeling like he could cut through somebody because he thought that Thomas Hickey was a ghost, I guess, and he could just pass through his ethereal being and not realizing he had masses as a strong human being. But I just, again, I feel like, I feel like with Shanny, like we got to a point with him where something happened and you were just like, that's going to get it. And now we're at a point where it's like, I don't know, could be. Could be like Tom Wilson, kneeing Connor Shear.

You're talking about what goes into the lexicon and what doesn't. Like, Marcus Johansen stayed down for a while. If Cedricotts knee had bent back the other way, like the aliens and that Charlie Sheen-Marx movie. Oh, the arrival. The arrival. I always mix up that with a signal, but it's the arrival. Right, right. The arrival.

Like, you goes to Mexico and there's global warming and all that stuff. Right. Then, like, something would have happened. But, again, I know that's part of the whole NHLPA, NHL they decide this. But they don't tell you that you can't suspend guys. They tell you what you have to use of your criteria. So, like, you could suspend them if you wanted to, but you don't. And so now people complain.

Then the voice gets loud enough where you give Chris Latang a game when you didn't give Hickey anything. And you don't give Boyle anything. So it just seems like it's super duper random. And again, Boyle said I don't think really was suspendable. I thought it was, like, a little bit late. But I thought it was in the act of finishing the check. But if you gave Latang that, like, to me, like, the Hickey hit on, not Drew-N, the one on Pauquet was vicious and dirty. The game was over.

They were down three with a minute to go. and he was just like, fuck it, I'm going to try and end this guy. When it was La Tang, I do believe that he thought Johansson was going to go to the net, so he was trying to stop him. So at least there's at least good intentions there. But again, it's about optics. That good word, optics. If it had been later, Charlie Sheen,

it probably would have been a movie that took place in a brothel, which would have been really fun. And then he probably would have wasted an alien and then just, like, stood over the body and said, winning. What's the... Wait, what's the plot of the... the movie, like, all the girls are aliens, and he has to try and save the human girl?

No, it's like Attack the Block, but instead of being in the slums of the UK, it's, uh... What's Attack the Block? That's the John Boyagan movie. It takes place... Who's John Boyang? He's the guy played Finn and Force Awakens? Who's... Oh, I just forget it. Wait, I thought Finn was the girl in Force Awakens.

Oh, my God, no. That's Ray. Ray's the girl, Finn's the boy. Oh, I thought Ray was the Stormtrooper that turns good, and then Finn was the girl. You flipped the names. Why? Because Ray's a boy's name? No, because...

Spells it, R-E-Y. Huckleberry. Thank you. So anyways. I seriously haven't seen it. I really thought that was true, by the way. I've not seen the Force Awakens. Finn's the boy.

Ray's the girl. And then B-B-A-'s the robot. I distinctly think during the teen chat era of my Twitter, I distinctly think I remembered asking them if they had seen the new Star Wars movie because they're all teenage girls. And I was like, I was like Finn didn't do anything for you, thinking Finn was the... So when all those stories came out about there not being any Ray-

action figures at Toys R Us, you thought it was about racism. I had no idea what was going on. I'm not going to lie to you. Like, we were walking in today. We were talking about current events. You're like, do you watch the news? I'm like, I heard Trump dropped out. That's, I pretty much know what's going on with Trump.

It's the opposite of what happened. Right. Like, I don't know what's going on with Star Wars action figures and who. Anyway, so he's in a brothel and the aliens attacked the brothel and him and the Mexican call girls have to band together and defeat them. That would be the arrival for me. Oh, so it's kind of like. If it was later Charlie Sheen.

It's like that George Clooney, Quentin Tarantino, vampire movie from Dustal Dawn. Like, instead of fighting off the bar patrons, they're fighting off prostitutes. Well, no, the prostitutes are on the side of good and light, as they often are. Oh, well, then who are the aliens in the brothels? The aliens are, they're trying. It's an invasion like science. But, yeah, the prostitutes aren't the aliens. They're fighting the aliens.

Oh, so it's like a lot of metaphysical boring conversation. But the alien leader is Emilio Estevez to tie back into men at work. So, like, Emilio Estevez, like, goes downstairs to restock the bar, and there's an alien trapped in there, and it's like scratching its finger under the door, and he's just like, bro, can you get me a 12 of PBR, man? Right, exactly. And then he gets taken over, and then he's the alien leader, and then we have a bro versus bro showdown. And it works a good movie. I like that movie. As you're talking about Chris Letang, I think the issue with Letang is this.

So the issue with Orpick is one thing. The issue with Orpick in that hit is that, according to him and according to what he said in that here, it was a hit that he was told to deliver because they're trying to pound the Pittsburgh defense as much as they can he clearly wasn't anywhere near the puck he clearly went over to hit him he thought Mada was going to the net for a rebound

this is nonsense he went over it and laid out a hit it was interference he knew what he was doing for sure no but like Mada stops and cuts to the net and I think I think Orpick thought the puck might be right behind him which is why he did it doesn't justify hitting him in the head but I can see the thought process

but the reason he gets three games is because Mada missed almost all game two he misses game three The Penguins probably go in there and be like he's going to miss at least three games. If you count the one he already missed. Right. And so the NHL's like, okay, three games. But, like, I did not think he was getting three games.

He got three games because of the injury. Right. And it's one of those things where, like, the injury is supposed to, like, add to the suspension. And now we're at a point where the injury is the suspension. You know what I mean? Like, if Thomas Hickey's head, it hit the backboards and, you know, he laid there forever and got stretched it off, then it's probably something for Brian Boyle. But since he didn't, and it's just like, oh, well, he was faking.

You should have not embellished or whatever. No, but... But then you get into the Latang hit, and Latang hit is much more within the flow of the play. Absolutely. It's a hit that his coach will admonish him for not delivering, honestly. Yep. He delivered it late, and he delivered it a little bit high,

but the head wasn't the principal point of contact, and the guy played the rest of the game. So while I understand politically, and within the context of other rulings why LaTang was suspended, I don't blame a Penguins fan for being like Oh, for sure, I know. But there was no injury on the play. It was a bang, bang situation.

Maybe he deserved a major for interference, but why should that be a suspension? Right. Like, I get that. That's why I go back to it's wheel of justice part two. Wheel of Justice harder. Like, we're just completely not, there's no way of predicting anymore. Like, again, I feel like with Shanny,

you knew what was illegal and you knew what it wasn't. Like, there were still times during the Shanny era where, you know, a guy would change the plane of his head, and it got hit and wasn't a suspension. But the stuff that was like suspended, again, there's criteria that you, that both the PA and the league agreed to that would result in suspensions, right? So to me, like the, the, the, the, the, the, the, the Tang hit suspendable, the Latang stick thing, even though that excuse me. Against Stalberger, Rangers series. That should have been suspendable, the, the, the, the, Orpick hit for sure.

But just because a guy walks away from the hit, like Orloff and frig. Let me ask you. Let me ask you about that. Let me ask you about that. Because in some cases, we have the argument of how severe the injury could have been. Yes. And so how do you feel about those? I'll tell you something right now.

I was watching that Dallas Blues game. That horseshit last night. And there was a moment in which David Back has tried to deliver a Tito Santana flying forearm to Jamie Bend, but missed. Oh, I didn't see that. And you say to yourself, all right, but he tried it. He did it. It attempted murder. Right.

I'm willing to go as far as to suspend guys for the attempted murder with like a stick. You know, like if Marty McSorley had missed Donald Brashear's head, like he still probably should have gotten 10 games for trying to murder him. But like if a hit, if a guy like comes in and, because like if a dude goes into the boards and misses the hit, like I didn't see the back of his hit so I can't. But like sometimes a guy goes into the boards and like misses the hit and like his arms kind of like go out and like his elbows go in to kind of brace himself. Like I can't suspend for that. But to me like the injury like it should be like, all right, how bad was that? the hit. And you go and you look at the La Tang hit, and it's like, all right, that's a bad hit. You shouldn't have delivered it. You hit the head. It was late. Two games. Is the guy hurt?

Yes. Double it. Is the guy hurt? No. Two games. Like, it shouldn't be it's two games if the guy is hurt. It should be the hit gives you the certain amount of games. So you don't believe that there should be any influence on the sentencing when it comes to the injury. Right. Like, it's insane that like every time after a hit, a guy, oh, he's out of practice the next day. Oh, he's out of practice the next day. oh, he can't skate, he's not on the ice. Which is with the capitals of the Johansson. Of course, he's playing in game four, and, like, everybody was giving me copious amounts of shit for that yesterday. Yeah, but, like, it's just that that's just, if the system wasn't that way, you wouldn't have to do that.

Like, that's a point of that, that's how you know the system is bad when teams are trying to, like, pretend dudes are hurt. And even, like, that game, too, people were like, oh, man, they're probably going to hold out Johansson the rest of the game because they're down to nothing and they don't want to come back. Like, that didn't happen. But that's how people think, because that's how the system is. I still think there's a happy medium between eye for an eye, and. and acknowledging the manpower loss for another team. Like, the example I always give eye for an eye, as people know, is the Joe Thornton hit on David Perron a few years ago,

where Peron missed, like, a season. Oh, were you called it a pick on Twitter? I called it a pick, and then Peron started yelling at me. I would have yelled at you, too, that he fucking wrecked him. He wasn't, he wasn't set in a play. He was put, I meant, I meant pick in the sense that he, he skated in front of him in the neutral zone, and then took him out of the play.

But you say pick and you mean something very specific, which is a player on the blue line where you're trying to get a guy open. Yeah, you're like cycling and you rub off a guy. You're in a cycle. But, like, he set that out of the box, looked up, saw the past coming to prom, was like, oh, if I timed this just,

and nope, you didn't time it right. And now he's his life is his own frame. He tried to sit. So I might have been annoyed, too, if you were referring to my year of loss. Well, I mean, since I was saying, he tried to set a pick and then he didn't do it correctly. Like, he was like he was Clay Thompson at the top of the key, like just like this, shoulders tucked in.

Point being, because you're derailing this conversation, much like Perranded. The point being is that, If we did eye for an eye, Thornton would have missed a year for that play, and I don't think that that's right. No, you can't do eye for an eye. But that said, you know, I know that suspending to the injury opens up a whole big Pandora's boxy, canna-wormsy thing when it comes to these teams playing grab-ass with their players in health and availability and stuff like that. But I do think that, you know, in a playoff series, if you don't have Oli-Mata for three games, that should factor into the suspension for Warpick. I really do.

Oh, like I said, it should factor in, but it should not be the thing that it should never. ever be to the point where it's like, well, that guy is out for three games, now it's a suspension. And I know that's not what player's safety will tell you it is, but that's kind of what it comes across as in the playoffs. Like guys, like, remember the Zetterberg, um, Weber thing where the game

was over and like Weber and Zetterberg were like on the boards, like, puck with him, like, and like Shea Weber, punched him in the back of the head so fucking hard that he broke his helmet. That's one of the dirtiest things I've ever seen. It slams against the glass, too. Right. Like just, just, just, He was fucking Nick Foley in a hardcore match.

Cracked the helmet. And it was like, oh, my God. Like, that is his bad. Like, that's a headshot to the point where he cracked his helmet and nothing. And you know why there was nothing? Because Zetterberg was fine. It wasn't hurt. So that should not be how it is.

As these series go last night, as we taped this, the Blues blew out Dallas. I mean, you know, Dallas was sitting pretty, I think, most of this year, thinking that allowing their offense to carry them, hoping and praying that one of these goalies going to be worth a damn in the playoffs, but they're obviously going to have to trade for a goalie in the off season, yeah? But who's going to take, so they're going to buy out the enemy? They'd have to buy out one of those guys. Probably buy out a letton, you'd think. I can't see, like I'd rather have letting in than, signing the Emmy was... At least, but the Emmy stays healthy. Letting

and you never know. And also, but here's the thing, though. I bet you they don't do it because they're going to be like, well, with this combination, we won the West, we won around, and we did it without Tyler Sagan. So if we had Tyler Sagan, so if we had Tyler Sagan, so I don't think they're, I mean, that is a big factor. Like, I think if the, if the if the stars had Tyler Sagan, we won't, you know, and maybe they could beat St. Louis, but if he's not coming back this series, they're kind of, as they say, effed in the business.

In the business, they say that, the technical term? Yeah, you people out there don't operate at the same level we do. F is kind of a technical hockey term for can't win. The blues just look like a more complete team. They've got defensemen who played defense. They've got guys in the line. And it's exciting to see a bunch of guys that are usually on the sidelines for them in the playoffs, like Bacchus and Steen and players like that

that don't necessarily contribute as much. offensively in the postseason as they're doing the regular season step up and play they're excited i'm like legit excited that the blues are going to have a shot at this thing right like i feel like it's such a long time coming i'm super happy for brian elliott i've long made the uh the comparison of brian elliott being the ugly girl in the 80s team comedy team comedy and then you know big football studs like oh man ryan miller so hot marty brodoer oh captive the cheerleading squad so hot jake allen oh such a hot freshman but look at her oh she's got pain on her overalls glass is on and then lo and behold and he's like I'm I'm 935 the past five years like why can I get a shot at this I don't understand and then lo and behold

Brian Elliott descends that staircase in his prom dress and lo and behold save me out on top of the crease save save and I feel good for that guy like he got he got past oh it's like the guy who gets pass over for promotion for like seven years he's he's based you know he is he's Stanley choucci and the devil wears Prada passed over for promotion by that terrible terrible Miranda Priestley you wear the those skates and I will wear my mask. Oh, save me out on the broken black heart. The funny part for you, though, is that you've seen not another teen movie more than you've seen She's All That. Probably.

All right. Yeah. That's what I thought. I was just trying to ignore the Devil Wears Prada reference because it's a bad movie. Stay tuned for that future episode, ladies and gentlemen. We got a devil wears Prada idea that might break the internet. We got plans. We got plans.

So, anyways, so I'm very, I'm happy for the, and I mean, you know, Who else I'm happy for? Happy for Captain Kangaroo, their coach, Ken Hitchcock. I'm happy that this is such an amazing story that I don't even know how people, maybe people can't wrap their brain around writing it yet. This was a guy who's on a one-year contract because they were going to fire him, and they were going to hire Mike Babcock. And then Mike Babcock said, so how much you're going to offer?

Oh, not all the money? That's not an opportunity that I'm in for. Keep going to Toronto. All about opportunity. And so they went back to Hitch and said, look. Hey, we've always, we've always liked you. No, ignore all those rumors. And there was also probably this thing that where they looked over at Pittsburgh and they're like,

firing the coach, they got you amazing regular season success because of playoff and efficiency, you end up with that. So then they bought them back. And so it's an amazing story that like this time, the last time, the time where if they don't win, they're going to blow up the fucking team is the time that they actually, it actually works out. And maybe it's the same thing in San Jose. Maybe you have to get to that point. You have to get to the point where the GM or the owner has his hands on the plunger on the big box that says TNT, and he's halfway down and about to explode the team, and then lo and behold, you figure it out.

And lo and behold, the guy with the no move clause puts his foot between the pump and the box and says, no, no, no, no, no, no, I'm not going anywhere, so you better figure this out. Not this time, oddly named San Jose owner, whose name escapes me. Oh, it's German, right? Yeah, and the problem is that You ever have a thing where you can't remember the name because another name that has nothing to do with that name has invaded your mind? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I can never remember Skip Bayliss's name. I always want to call him Woody Page. See, there you go. I don't know why. But at least that's a sports or anything. Right now, in my mind, when I tried to pull the San Jose owner's name, I came up with Hirouki Sakai, who I believe was Iron Chef Japan and the original Iron Chef.

See, I thought his name was Adolf Schweitzer. Because it sounds German and I don't know. No. Oh, Hoh. Hum. Hun. Oh, Hanzo. Hattori Hanzo.

Is that what it is? Yeah, he makes this amazing, those amazing swords. Oh, my God. No, it's like Han, it's like Hanzo. Bronzo? Talk for a second. Okay. So anyway, I think Bruce Bruejo really deserve to be fired, to be perfectly honest.

Speaking of regular season, coaches that should not be fired because they're super awesome in the regular season. and I thought Mary made a good point in that you can't okay so he's he's lost four straight series while up three two and he's 0-8 in those games and people are like his PDO is 92 point yeah but you can't go into the playoffs next year with him because you're going to get up three-two again at some point and your team's going to be like um so good job ducks i looked i looked up his name but every search that did came up with a junior jumble puzzle hasso plotner uh if you unscramble that i think we'll find his name so all that's he'll find his name so all All your kids at home get working on that. I disagree with you on Bidreau, by the way. I am one of those people that thinks that his teams play well in a game seven. I think that he's been the victim of having to play some very good goaltenders in a game seven

and not having very good goaltenders play well, not having the man in goal. That's the thing about him. He's never had a Pecker-Renay. He's never had a Henrik Lundquist. It's always a platoon. Part of that's his fault, which I agree with. The only thing that I'm going to, the only other thing I'll say about Bruce is this. The amount of times that he's lost a game.

I think it's maybe five or six times. Lost a game six and then the team loses in game seven. And in that game seven, they give up the first goal, I think speaks to the emotional makeup of the team. And I think that speaks to the coach. Because he is, listen, he is a guy that we've seen going to locker room and scream, get your fucking asses out of your heads and all that shit. And like, so it's like a, it's the emotion that drives the players.

And then when that emotion turns sour, when that, when that, when you can feel it in the room, that the guy that is your sort of like emotional momentum guy is like being like ah slumpy shoulders looking at the beer and wonder if you could just drink one in front of the team because you're so sad. Like you feel that and I feel like the teams come out in game sevens flat. Right. So then you agree with me then.

You don't agree with me because like... He's always going to be that guy. Those are two games out of 82 in the regular season and five more in every series. There are two. But those are the games like you have to... It's like my thing with Mark Andre Fleury. where I was always like, yeah, he's going to win you 40 in the regular season.

But if you know he's going to craft his pants every April and May, what's the point? But didn't we just get done fucking talking about being patient with people, the Brian Elliott, remember she's all that? He comes down to staircase, no more paint on the overalls. Oh, I was just trying to do a bit. Was there a deeper meaning to that? I just wanted to do a version of kissing. No, I'm saying I don't blame Bruce.

And I do feel like the ducks are going to fuck it up like the penguins did. They're going to fire a good coach. They're going to go out and try and bring in, you know, to promote Trent Yanni or hire Randy Carlisle or do some dumb shit. And they're going to be like, well, you see, now we're going to get results. And then they're going to be like on the bubble and out in the first round again. But like, I just, I think you had to, you had to do something different at this point. You had to. You had to do it.

110 points per season and all that. You had to do something different. But what do you do there? Anything else? Something else. And don't you think the GM should have to pay the price here for this too? Or do you think that it's the coaching? more so than anything else.

Coaching versus construction is one of our favorite arguments. I feel like that team is pretty good. I feel like that team should not lose in the first round to Nashville. I agree with that. I had them win in the cup. Yeah, not for nothing. We're probably the wrong people to ask about this. But also, I still think Pittsburgh, Washington is for the cup at this point.

Listen. I don't think St. Louis is going to beat either of those two teams. I'm happy you brought that up because something happened on a previous podcast that was unfortunate it was probably I mean in the eyes of a lot of people kind of offensive and so I want to take this moment on Puck Soup and apologize for

our playoff picks. They were terrible. I do not know what I was thinking when. Somebody tweeted me the other day and were like, I just listened to the predictions episode of Puck Soup and laughed and laughed. Dude, if Anaheim had won that stupid game seven, I would have been six and two

in round one with my, I think my entire, no, I had Florida going to the conference, but I would have had my championship team. You know what? Yeah, right. So is he going to go to Calgary or what? Because that was the other big news of the week as we headed up to this podcast taping was the Calgary Flames firing Bob Hartley, and it was great. I loved every moment of this thing because they called an emergency meeting on Monday. So good.

48 hours basically after Boudreau gets fired. And the GM, Brad Trullitting, for those who don't know, the son of the founder of Boston Pizza, who is on the Canadian shark tank, which is called Dragons Den up there. Come on, is it really? They're called Dragons. You're just doing a Canadian's different than a sport, right? I know.

I think Dragons Den was the thing that came before a shark tank. You know? And so to answer your question, I don't want to insert myself in. I still feel like you're doing a bit. No, I'm not. To answer your question that you didn't ask, but I'll answer it anyway.

My guess was at ABC at the time. This is before Game of Thrones. This is before Game of Thrones. I imagine ABC at the time said, if we name it dragons then, no one's going to watch it. There anything is like 20-sided dice and shit. Hi, my name is Jeffrey. I'm from St. Louis, Missouri,

and I invented a sword that attracts women. If you just wave it around on the bar, it glows. I need $8 million to manufacture. Jeffrey, I don't know what you're thinking with this valuation. I mean, what did you do? Come in here and cast a feeble mind spelling us? See, I would watch this show, actually. Again, we're pitching our ideas out into the public.

By the way, you see the Flu Network stole a TV show for me? No, what did they do? Uh-oh, hang on. Not really, I don't think. Before you say anything, can I just finish? Yeah, do your bit. Close it. Close it out. Jeffrey, the market for Invisibility Cloaks is very crowded, but it's a market that I know.

So I'm walking I'm familiar with. Go ahead. Okay, good. So there's a quarterback in college. His name's Connor Cook. I think he was at Michigan State. His name's Connor Cook. Yeah, another quarterback the Jets didn't take.

Yeah. Because if you can get a quarterback. Christian Hakenberg on your team. Oh, Paxton ended up on the cover of S-I. Paxton Lynch. So, again, as all my tweets are, they're all bad. But my joke was like, Connor Cook is a quarterback, but Khan or Cook is a food network show where you have to try to guess if the food was cooked by a convicted felon or a chef.

Tweeted this like a year ago. And then, like, I saw Connor Cook got drafted. And I started to type the same joke again, and I was like, wait, I made this joke already. So I found the old tweet, tweeted it. And somebody replied to me with like, dude, you know what they turned this into a TV show. Baker Khan. It's a fucking real show that I invented it and we had it stolen from it. Well, I mean, listen, they tweaked it a little bit instead of using convicted felons, which is weird.

Come on. They used, that's biased. It's a show in which a chef is either a real chef or just like a random. But they didn't actually have felons. Oh, really? Oh, I thought it was actually like people who spent time in prison. I guess that's a little different then. It's like, are you a cook or a con?

I'm a con. Double murder. Three counts of rape. I'm glad you enjoyed the souffle. Wow, you're really good. You should get a job. Sorry, I can't, though, anywhere because people aren't higher. That's what it would be.

It would be like a second chance show for people who have redeemed themselves through the court system. I love that idea. And then the winner gets a job at a restaurant and then eventually becomes De Niro's wheelman and the heat. The heat house. Yes, right. And he went on to become a spokesman for Allstate. But he got murdered in heat. Spoiler.

Oh, yeah, right. He's driving away and gets a bullet right in the sky. Golf. Dennis Hayesbert. Pedro Serrano himself. What a career for him. Pedro Serrano and Major League, Wheelman and Heat, and... The president on 24, right? The president on 24, and the Allstate guy. I went through the IMDB page of that Connor Cook thing to see who created the show and to see if they were on Twitter, because I was like, this guy fucking stole it. Not really, though. It wasn't... Oh, God, if you did that and found follows you under his name on Twitter,

I can't even imagine what would have. It wasn't like Ted 2, where they absolutely stole the F. Scott Fitzgerald a joke for me. Yeah, tell the audience that because people don't know that. So, again, all my jokes are bad. I'm aware of this. And so, like, I tweeted this fake conversation where it's like, who's your favorite author? F. Scott Fitzgerald. Well, why do you hate Scott Fitzgerald?

I don't. What? You just said F. Scott Fitzgerald. Like, it's basically that joke. It's legitimately that joke. It's literally a joke I've never seen or heard before anywhere. And so I tweeted, like, a long time ago. And then we were in Tampa for the Stanley Cup final.

I checked my phone. And I have, like, five tweets at me that are like, bro, did you see the TED2 commercial? Like, why would I want to see that? Dude, I think your joke is in TED2. And I'm sitting there and I'm just trying to figure out what it would, and then I'm like, the F. Scott Fitzgerald joke. So, and like I went, went to the, went to the Wikipedia page of Ted, Ted 2, and they filmed it right when I tweeted it.

So, like, it's, and it's an animated movie. So you can just insert dialogue at any time you want. And I was, I, I remain convinced that. I don't know, man. Seth, Seth Macfarlane, not someone known to steal from funnier sources and or be hacky. No, yeah, right? Yeah.

It's weird. But whatever. So happy for the blues. The Sharkis and Hanzo, Hattori Hanzo, their owner, playing the Predators, Predits get back in the series. But overall, like, I just feel like there's this sort of, this calm, serene confidence with the sharks, and maybe they've lulled me into that sense. But I feel like it's all going to be all right for them.

I'm happier for the sharks than I am the Blues. Yeah? Yeah. Just because of the way they've lost in the playoffs. Like the way they've lost all the shit that Joe and Patty Marlowe's score last night or two nights ago at this point when you're listening to this. That where he cut through Weber and Yosi. Yeah. That was pretty sweet.

Put the jets on. Right. Doesn't have any guts though in the playoffs according to Jeremy Rone. No, yeah. He's also probably has more, he's like one of the leading scores in playoff history now. But, you know, whatever. He's not on TV like Jeremy Ronick. I'm not mumbling through his fucking analysis that he never doesn't invest any time.

Mike Millard-Barre the other night legitimately said that the two keys, players in the Predators Sharks game for the Predators for Peca Rene and Shea Weber. During the Bruins, during the Bruins, during the fucking Penguins game, during one of the intermissions, he was like, man, they got to just keep their nose down

and keep grinding and try to get these two points. Like, what, are you fucking serious? Like, you talk for four minutes every 30 minutes on TV. Mike, two points. Who are the case in this Bill and Ted movie? I really think it's going to be Keanu Reeves and Alex Winter. God, I hate NBC.

Well, that actually brings us to new bit here on Puck Soup that we'd like to bring. As you know, if you follow us on Twitter, there is a phenomenon in hockey called hockey porn. And on other podcasts that Dave and I may or may not have done

or still do on a regular basis, and please listen to Merrick Riz Wichershyshinsky. We can't play profanity or even really heavy double entendre necessarily all the time. We can't? I don't know. So we figured that this would be a good place for it. So hockey porn, a new department here on Puck Soup, and if you find evidence or instances of hockey porn, please do send it our way.

Hashtag Puck Soup. This, of course, is a premature hockey pornism. This, of course, is Pierre McGuire of NBC Sports, one of the single greatest individuals in the history of mankind, and also a guy who stands between the benches and tries avoid getting hit the head with pucks. This is him doing the Blues Stars game one was it? This was game two because they rallied in it, right? Jamie Ben ties it late. Yeah. He hadn't been doing much, I don't think.

Yeah. So he scores a big goal. And here comes Pierre McGuire, ladies and gentlemen. Wait, what? Wait, wait, what? He said it's coming. It just came. It just came.

This here is Mike Milbury of NBCSN and NBC. You'll know him from such desk pieces as he heard of Bruin, suspend him. Brooks Warpix's the worst man in the world. And I think the two key players in this game are the two best players. Here's Mike Milbury the other night talking about hockey. The result of a needed forecheck and a breakdown by Washington. Defense have to communicate and stick together,

but they can't forget one primary fact. The front of the goal is the most important territory on the ice. They've got to have somebody protecting the house. John Carlson should go back to the front of the net stop and let Orpick chase the buck carrier or if Carlson goes, Orpick should be in front. Neither happens. And that leaves Haglin wide open in front and that juicy slot area. He makes no mistake.

No. Yeah. Once again. Here's the thing, here's the thing, though. Hold on, once again. It should be in front. Neither happens. And that leaves Hagelin wide open in front.

And that juicy slot area, he makes no mistake. I think it's important to note that in order to come. And let someone know that you're coming. Yes. It needs to be in the juicy slot area. You have to have the juicy slot area if you're going to come. Yeah. If you're going to come, you may end up in the juicy slot area whilst.

It's not absolutely, you know, a 100% thing you need if you're going to come. But if, you know, when you come, announce you're going to come, do it in the juicy slot area if you can. So if you find any more instances of hockey porn, please send it our way, Puck Soup podcast on Twitter or hashtag at Puck Soup. There's one out there. There's one from that same Stars Blues game where Troy Broward went to the net hard. and I believe again it was Pierre who said that Troy Brower was coming angry and it was the point where

he had already said like four things and I'm watching it on my TV I was just like I'm not vining this I don't want to do it It's a donkey punch doc So Speaking of Pierre McGuire Dave and I were really heartbroken watching game three of the St. Louis Blues series against the Dallas Stars Because Tony X

A.k. what was his real name here? is Anthony Holmes, who of course, you know, as a Twitter superstar now, a guy that captured the hearts and minds of everybody with his guy discovering hockey tweets, such as white people be hiding hockey from us and so on and so forth. And various other things that, by the way, couldn't air on NBC. I like the one where he figured out that the best way to score is off rebounds and block shots. Like, he figured it out in five days, but, like, you know, some hockey people have not

figured out in 30 years. So he attended game three. The Blues gave him seats right near the. glass, which, by the way, shame on you, blues. Put the man upstairs where the real fans are in the best place to watch the game. But I guess if it's to introduce him to the speed and velocity of playoff hockey, suppose that's all right.

Now, Pierre McGuire was going to interview Tony X during the game. He said so. At the end of the second period, Dave and I stupidly watched the intermission report waiting for this. That's the first intermission report I've watched in like five fucking years. And Jesus, it was bad. The first part

of the intermission report was a live looking of the Predators game that was on another channel. I could go watch that if I want. Why would you do a live look at a game that's on nationally? It's not an address from the president. You have to simulcast it. I'm sitting there. I'm like, all right, I guess I'll just watch it on this channel instead of USA. So we were really upset that this interview never actually happened, which is why we promised the listeners of Puck Soup that we would do our best to recreate what it would sound like if Pierre McGuire interviewed Tony X. I'll be playing the role of Pierre McGuire.

Dave Lozo will be playing the role of Tony X and trying not to be over the racist about it. That's your warning. I don't know what he sounds like, so I'm just going to have to just guess what he sounds like. All right. So I will play the role of Pierre McGuire. He might be British. And this is, that's very true. You never heard of him speak.

Wait, I've heard of speak on the radio, actually. He's not British. So this is Pierre McGuire. Your play-by-play announcer is John Forsland. Thanks, John. I'm here with Tony X, also known as Anthony Holmes, who grew up in University City, which produced the great former New York Metropolitan's and St. Louisville's outfield of Bernard Gilke,

who played for the 1991 AAA Louisville Redbirds under the Great Mark John. Tony, it's your first hockey game. How excited are you? Are you for real? Speaking of first games, rookie Colton Pareko has been an absolute monster this postseason. Ken for Ken Hitchcock and the St. Louis Blas of the NHL's Western Conference played as Collegiate Hockey for the Alaska and the NUCS in the NCAA Men's Division One Western Collision Hockey Association under the Great Dallas Ferguson, who played for the Anchorage Aces of the West Coast Hockey League.

Anthony X, is it colder than you expected here? I didn't agree to this interview. Thank you. Anthony X, you cut your teeth on a live journal account before moving over to Friendster and using that to catapult yourself to Twitter. You took everything you learned under social media mastermind time from the great MySpace, and now you're here at Game 3 of the Stanley Cup playoffs Western Conference semifinals. So Anthony X, my question to you, how little are you right now?

Are you erect right now, Pierre? You seem erect. Anthony X, even as a new blues fan, you have to be impressed with how they came tonight. They kept coming and coming and pumping and pumping rubber into the five holes. and making the place explode with their strong, impressive common flow. Anthony X, how did you like their work in the slot? Oh, you're definitely hard. I can see it now. Yeah. Anthony X, also known as Anthony Holmes, product of University City.

This is the part of the interview where I tell you to go have fun out there and give you a friendly tap on your tushy like your Mac Cullen. Are you ready? This is why I'm going to delete my Twitter. And seen. It's always good to do a public service for people. Right, right, yeah. I think that helps because that's pretty much, exactly how it would have happened.

Because I feel like Tony X is sick of his fame at this point and doesn't want to have that interview. And that would be the interview that would push him over the edge to just delete his entire social media presence. And question not only his hockey fandom, but also his place in humanity, I think. Right. Right. How can this strange, smegglesque turtle man? Why does he know where I went to elementary school? I don't understand this.

Who's Docinetti? Is that one guy? Dachanetti. Talking Eddie. So the character in a Mellencamp song. That's the one thing I think. If Pierre stopped speaking directly to Eddie every time he had something to say, I probably like Pierre a lot more. He's the only guy in the world who does it.

I don't, I'll stop. I can't do this now. Tampa Bay Lightning and New York Islanders, I kind of love this series for a couple of reasons. One, that the Islanders remain this scrappy. I love a scrappy underdog, and I think they are in this series. But I also love to see, remember in T2 when Robert Patrick's Terminator would get exploded and then you'd see all the little liquid metal pieces kind of coming back together to form the robot-killing machine again.

Sure. I feel like that's the lightning right now. Like the triplets are back together. Headman's playing good. Bishop didn't have a good game three, but he's playing okay. And now you got Strollman on his way back. You got Stamco's on his way back. They just got to survive.

If they survive this series, man, it could be full speed ahead for them. Right. Like Pittsburgh, Washington, I think, is for the Cup. With the caveat that if Stamcois and Strachlman are back for the third, round, then it's different. But I don't know. I don't know. I don't think Tampa, like, the Islanders

are so reliant on Tavares doing stuff and Grice being good, where, like, last night, they kind of had off games, and they lost by a goal and overtime. So I still kind of like the Islanders to win the series. I don't. I like the Tampa Bay is to win this series. I just...

What is it about... You see, Tyler Johnson's a great example of a guy who's the opposite of the Blues and the Sharks. Like, what is it about the the guy who elevate, not elevates, but just seems to score a lot. I don't want to use elevates this game because that's stupid. I mean, the only guy that, the only guy that you could point to and say, like, there's material evidence that he played better in the playoffs in the regular season was Claude Lemieux. That's it.

Justin Williams, too. Well, Justin Williams, maybe, maybe Danny Breyer. Like, Justin Williams, I mean, he shouldn't have won the cons might that year, but he did because he got a ton of points. But would you put Tyler Johnson in that? Because he's a pretty damn good regular season. That's right. He kind of had an off regular season. But he was like, wasn't he like top ten in scoring last year?

So I don't know if I put him in there. I think he's just good at hockey. He's just a good, he's just a tiny guy who's good at hockey. That's the thing is like he's a little tiny guy. And Breyer was a tiny guy too. Maybe the playoffs are a time for tiny guys. Right, right. The playoffs, everyone's trying to hit and stuff.

And he's like the who's the little figure skater dude in the Mighty Ducks movies that would like figure skate by everybody and score goals. Like maybe like that's who the little guys are. Someone should totally put Peter Dinklage on their 50-man roster. Peter Dinklage, Star of Game of Thrones. That's right. What a segue? Is that a segue?

Yeah, why not? I don't. So, as you know, Lozo is a huge Game of Thrones fan, and I have never actually seen Game of Thrones. I didn't watch the first season, because I just assumed to get canceled, because when does a show like that ever succeed? Or a movie like that ever succeed?

It's fair. Or anything of that nature ever succeed? Oh, I don't know. Only the Lord of the Rings have six movies. Yeah, for every Lord of the Rings is a fucking Aragorn, so, you know. There's also the... And a Dungeons and Dragons will be with Jeremy Irons. Jeremy Irons and Dungeons and Dragons, by the way,

if you've never seen it. Actually, from the scene to scene, carries around a paycheck under his arm. It's like a giant publisher's clearinghouse check. It's fantastic. That's my goal in life. It just gets so famous that I don't have to do anything anymore.

Just show up and they give you a bunch of money. So I'm playing ketchup on Game of Thrones and trying to get Lozo to educate me a little bit. So I just had a few brief questions about the series, and I'm hoping this will be a good jumping off point for me to understand it better. I can't wait to see these questions that you came up with 40 minutes ago.

Okay, question one about Game of Thrones as Greg tries to play catch up. John Snow. I understand that's a big deal that he has spoiler warning returned. He's alive. Uh-huh. He's been resurrected.

Does John Snow have ice powers like Elsa from Frozen? Okay. I'm going to say no, but I'm only based on the fact that another dude got brought back from the dead, like, a couple seasons ago. And, like, his power just seemed to be to talk in creepy sort of ways about being dead and back alive. So I'm going to say no. I just think his power is going to be hopefully murdering Ollie. Ollie's a little 11-year-old kid that fucking murdered him, even though he's trying to help. But he's not the other little little little kid.

kid that used to be the ruler of the world, right? No, that guy's dead. He's done. He's dead. Ollie is this little fucking dick who murdered the only woman that John Snow ever got to make sex with and was like, yo, what's up? I just killed her. And, like, John Snow was like, all right, I'm going to be cool about this with Ali because Ollie didn't know. And then he's rewarded for that by Ollie being a traitor. Ali, Ollie is like, are all the kid rulers in the show? No, he's not a ruler. He's just like a little annoying kid who hangs out of Castle Black because his family got murdered by the wilds.

Do they all sound like friends of Hello Kitty, though? Yes, they really do. Fantastic. Oh, also, like Elsa from Frozen and Frozen 2, does John Snow date women? Does he date? Well, so here's the thing is, like, when you go to Castle Black, you basically take a vow of celibacy. So now that he's died and come back from the dead, like Melisandri, the red woman who brought him back, tries to seduce him by taking her clothes off, which I'm pretty sure I would work on literally any other person in the world.

But John Snow's like, look, I'm still in love of the grin. I'm still mourning. I got my things to do here at Castle Black. So no. Was Melisandri the one where you tweeted the picture of what looked like a deflated weather balloon? Oh, like her true form, which takes off her little amulet. I still think she's hot. That's why I'm telling you.

It's about the person, Greg. It's not about the physical form. Game of Thrones takes place in Westros. Westrose, the seven kingdoms. The seven kings of Westrose. Is Westros bigger than Hyrule? Um, you know what? It's interesting.

Actually, you know, it's pretty interesting about the comparisons there because in Hyrule, there's like a grassy sort of like place and then there's like a desert dry place. And then Dorn is actually sort of representative of, I think the Seven Kingdoms are bigger. And does it have a Weston, Westrose, because I have a preferred guest card? Greg, if you're not going to take this seriously, I'm not going to help you get caught up on the show. I'm going to take it seriously. Honestly, I haven't really paid attention to the show. Actually, it's just a Marriott. Okay.

Yeah, all NHR writers stay there. They stayed at it? Yeah. So. Scotty. So I've really paid attention to the show since the first season, so I'm playing catch up. Of course, of course. Question three.

I'm a big Sean Bean fan, and since his name is on the IMDB page, and I remember him from the trailers, how big of a part does he play and how much screen time does he have, and is he important to the overall thrust of Game of Thrones? Dude, that was like a seven-part question. Of course he's dead. Bean's in something. He dies. So yeah, spoiler alert. Sean Bean dies right away. Sean Bean is essentially like the San Jose Ozarks where he's a big star and you're like, this is going to be

it for him. And then, of course, he dies way before he goes. It's halfway through my Sean Bean season seven fanfic. You should do that, dude. I'm telling you, if you created like an alternate universe where Sean Bean's still alive, clicks. Again, like I'm trying to catch up here. I'm sorry, my questions are a little bit more general than what you're used to from Game of Thrones fans.

but question four. In Jamie Lannister's meeting with the High Sparrow, the High Sparrow responds with an outward threat to the empire after his treatment of Searcy was criticized. Do you think that the faith... Sercy. Sir, sure. Do you think that the faith militant has the power

to overthrow the empire, and what do we make of the fact that it was Searcy who rearmed them? Well, here's the thing. That plot kind of backfired on her because, you know, Marjorie was a real problem, and her plan was to kind of get rid of Marjorie, but it turned out they actually got rid of Searcy,

So here's the thing is the high sparrow really has control over the poor people within the kingdom. So I do think they have the power, but I believe this is going to be the season in which the Lannisters really drop the iron fist. The literal and metaphorical on that. Like Marvel's Iron Fist. That's Jamie Lannister wears on his missing. Oh, wait. I thought you meant like a crossover to the... That's Iron Man.

No, no, there's an iron fist as well. Oh, see. Now you're playing in my playground. And finally, last question. What is more? Isn't Game of Thrones just a fancy name for musical chairs? Yes, but you can only play it if you're a king, Greg. Sorry, Joffrey got up too soon and didn't sit back down to time, so that's why he died.

Spoiler alert. Okay, I got Force Awakens questions. How many scenes do Finn and Ray have sex in? They don't have sex. Does he take off the Stormtrooper costume in order to do it? It's a simmering, a simmering sexual tension. Oh, yeah? But mostly between him and Poe Dameron, an X-wing fight.

Oh, that's Oscar Isaac, right? Yeah. Why would there be not any sexual tension with... Oh, so, like, Finn's not getting any? Or there's no tension for him? No. He got Huckleberryed. That's...

Wait, Huckleberryed? Like, from Tombstone? I'll be a Huckleberry. I'll be a Huckleberry. It's time for your listener mail. It's a segment like we call him a listener mail. Listener mail. And we have a lot of different questions here.

What do we got? And Joey Werbley, having good... both expressed distaste for Pierre publicly. What's it like being around him in person? Any stories or feud? I've had one substantive conversation with Pierre about my criticism of him. And it happened

in Ottawa, I believe, draft or all-star game? What is, what happened up there? Both did. Both, I think, yeah. It might have been the draft. I remember it being nice out, outside. And we met in the lobby of this coffee shop after I was talking to some NBC people. And we had just this conversation. And it was

like me saying, well, you You know, listen, you're a decent guy. You're Jersey. I'm Jersey. People don't know he's from Jersey. He's from, you know. Regis. Yeah.

Regis. Yeah. So anyways. That's reason enough to not like him, that he would try to French-Canadian up his name for hockey. Like, fucking Christ. So we had a conversation where it was like me explaining why people don't really like him and him and him explaining his role on the broadcast.

And we kind of left it as, all right, I don't like you, you don't like me. And then the other time I met him, which was amazing. amazing was Oh boy And I don't know if you remembered me Was in London at the Olympics This was after this was after this was after this was after The criticism of Pierre

Online from Puck Daddy and from everywhere else You kind of got ratcheted up This was in London I was covering water polo Because my job in London was to do Goofy Man About Town stories And cover the sports nobody else wanted

It's like hockey but the ice melted Yeah they're like hockey boy We're paying you too much money Go cover that water polo thing and it's summer FAC quad So Farquod

So they So I was in the hallway And Doc Emrick And Pierre were doing The coverage Of water polo Because somebody NBC has said We're paying you too much money

Hockey fuck while Go cover water polo And so So I saw Doc I know Doc a little bit And I shook his hand And whatever And then

And stuck out my hand And Pierre gave me a hearty handshake And And I think Doc at that point it's like, well, Greg, it's great to see you. And all of a sudden, the handshake from Pierre became like, jello mold.

It's like, oh, it's you, you little cockroach. So that's, that was my two in-person. Ever have an in-person meeting with Pierre Maguire? Never. You know what? I did, back in the day, like in 2009, 2010, maybe, I got sent up to Toronto or to wherever the TSN studios are, Scarborough.

Where are they again? They're not in the right outside Toronto. And I was sent there by my boss. to interview TSN personnel. Craig McTabish was on the panel at the time. Peter Lobbyolette had just gotten there. So whenever he was fired, that's when it happened. And I had to interview all these guys for stories for NHL.com.

And I was just, he was just, he was fine. He wasn't terrible. He wasn't great. I have no, like, I see him, like at the Garden when you're waiting to go into the locker room, there's like an NBC game, he will come off and, like, grab his coat out of, like, a room down there and, like, walk out.

And I see him then. and I'm just like, I don't like you. I think you're not good on TV. And that's it. I kind of really have a good story. Sorry, Joey. Of the team's remaining, Daniel Brown wants to know which team is least likely to win the cup and why. And who could surprise us?

The Islanders? Yeah, I would say the Islanders. It would say the Islanders only because of the Path there. Yeah, they have the Path. It would legit surprise me if Dallas won the Cup, too, to be honest with you. Just because of the mess they are defensively. Yeah. Yeah.

I would say Islanders won. Dallas to Nashville 3. Nashville is pretty good. Nashville's got a goalie. They got defense. They got some... They don't have enough scores. Like, the islanders don't have enough depth that ought to afford. But that would surprise me. I'd be surprised.

This is my surprised face. Oh, it is. Mr. Jones 1 wants to know Goldfish croutons or saltines, what do you guys put in your soup? That's a puck soup question. And the answer is none of it. Because why would you want to mess up soup with like, like,

wet, soppy, used to be bread. And why would you put, oyster crackers was not on the list and that's what I would put in. Yeah, that's what I'm thinking.

Oyster crackers and chowder. Goldfish. Why would I waste goldfish in soup? And saltines are like what you eat when you have bad belly, but not I wouldn't put them in the soup that I'm eating when I have bad belly. And what was it?

It was saltines. What was the third one? Goldfish? What are you fucking six? No, what else is it? It was goldfish saltines. And what was the other one? The other one was,

croutons. Croutons. Like, The only time bread is acceptable in soup is oyster crackers and chowder and obviously French onion soup when you have the terraferma of bread on top of the onion soup that you have to go through. Dude, I guarantee you that person's like in college and they're just like doing what we did in college and just like creating meals based on what they have in the house. Like I've croutons. Like, come on, come on. This is puck soup.

It's not puck gross soup. You have, there's a question here that I have to find. There it is. High Deep wants to know Did you guys see the Oh right Right

Lichester? Lichester City? Lichester City Do you see the repeating next year Are Marese, Vardi and Gnati Going to stick around? Kanté is quite the footballer

He's one of my favorite footballers For the past like four years Since I've been watching Leicester City And I do think they got a great shot at repeating Can I ask you a question Last time we talked about footy, it seems like you did not know that Leicester City was basically the miracle on ice of the Premier League. The Miracle on Ice, that's a 1980 hockey thing. I don't really quite know about that.

I also did not know that Leicester City was involved in a really gross porno video before the season. So it's a wicked firecracker that team from start to finish, mate. I can't believe it. Those crazy blokes won themselves a title. Oh, I saw it, slide tackle four. Oh, my God. Oh, that's just absolutely firecracker. Who's the English soccer guy who calls all the games?

I love that guy. That was an absolute firecracker. By the way, people got so mad about that. Not really. Four people got mad about it. The best response I got to that was some guy was like, yeah, I'm a fan of the local MLS team, so I decided to root for their parent team back in England. And I was like, that's still kind of weird.

And some guy who wrote back to him was like, I did the same thing. And it took me seven or eight years to develop a emotional connection. I'm like seven or eight, you invested eight years of your life. People don't invest that long at a marriage where there's no emotional connection. If you force yourself to watch a team until you like them for eight years? It's like walking past a gerbil for eight years in your room and being like one day, I might feel something about this animal.

I might pet it at some point. Like, oh my God, you, like, it's just, oh, like, that's my point. It's so crazy that people, like, it's one thing to like like like the sport and be like, oh, this is being played at its highest level. I enjoy whoever's playing. but to like force yourself to like a team. Yeah. It's bloody maddening, Matt.

It's bloody maddening. It's bloody mental. So finally, in this segment, Hockey Lake wants to know, could you give a summary of every Star Wars movie? I'm only answering this question because I was on the Star Wars... I got to go. Hold on, no, no, no, no, it's real quick. I was on the Star Wars Minute podcast this week,

and we love those boys, and we hope to have them on the show. It's fantastic. It's a podcast where you analyze each minute of a Star Wars movie. My week was on The Phantom Menace. It's great. Listen to listen to it. But here's how I would summarize, at least George Lucas's approach, to the original six, the original six, the original six,

the original six movies. The best Star Wars movies are the original six ones. Episode four is about sex. Episode five is about daddy issues. Episode six is about a guy trying to make a movie about teddy bears for his kids. Episodes one is about a guy trying to make a movie for his slightly older kids

pretending they can be Starship fighter guys and save the day like Anakin did. Episode two is about an angry, old nerd that's extraordinarily pissed off at the new nerds because they don't like his art anymore and saying, oh, you don't like my movie, you think it's boring? How about all the monsters and Yoda jumping

around with a lightsaber? And then episode three is an angry old nerd saying, well, I got to figure out how to finish it somehow. There's your Star Wars Sexelagogy. And Game of Thrones is weird. Sure. Oh, and of course Force Awakens

is, hmm, you know, that original movie, pretty good. Let's just do that again. Right. Like, again. Like, if that's the... I don't know why I would go see that movie. If it's just the first one over again.

I watched Jurassic World again on HBO there night, and people gave that movie so much shit. It's such a fun movie. It's terrible. I don't care that it's beat for... It's got beat for beats from the original movie. It's so much fun. Outside of Bryce Dallas Howard, that movie is so much fun.

And this is why, like, I saw somebody tweet that, like, the Ghostbusters, um... The, the, whatever, the trailer for it was on YouTube, and it's, like, the most disliked trailer in the history, which they were like, oh, Oh, that's misogyny at work, which, hey, yeah, probably, sure. It really is. But it's also a really shitty-looking trailer.

It's not funny. It doesn't look good. It's not funny. But I'll tell you, I'll tell you the biggest mistake that they made. And if you're somebody out there that thinks they shouldn't remake Ghostbusters with ladies, I mean, you're wrong. They shouldn't make it at all right. But you have to admit this. As angry as you are about that, you have to admit, the biggest mistake they made was setting the movie in New York again.

Like, that's the thing. New York is such a character in the original ghost. Ghostbusters. It's, you know, from the shots from Central Park up at the buildings, it's a very New York movie. It feels like New York. They go and talk to the Ed Koch proxy at one point when he's the mayor. Like, it's a very New York movie. And if they had said this thing in Chicago or Boston or New Orleans or some shit, like, it would feel so different than having them stand in fucking Times Square at one point in the trailer shooting ghosts.

Like, you've done, we've done New York. Like, New York was a perfect place for the first two movies. go do something else now. The second one at the Statue of Liberty walking through the streets of New York. So what would the third one be? It would be like, it would be like, like, Gillette Stadium rises up and starts like the...

You could do... Oh, God, if you set the thing in Boston, you could do a whole, like, dead Colonials thing or whatever. Like, you can go anywhere and do that movie. Do it in Chicago where it's a bunch of, like, you're fighting against a mob. Like, ghost mob.

Oh, ghost Capone. I'm just saying that it's okay to hate that movie because it just looks terrible and it's the same movie you've seen already. The same way The Force Awakens. If you don't want to see that, I understand that too. You're depriving yourself of joy. I mean, I'm going to see The Force Awakens.

You're somebody who walks past the pizzeria and just smells it instead of tasting it. That's so not me. Yeah. No, I just, wait, what were we talking? Like, it's just like reboots and remakes. I just, I've bitched about this. I don't want to give people the same.

Final thing we have to talk about today, of course, is the other thing that happens is the last show, which is the draft lottery. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. The Toronto Maple Leafs win the draft lottery. The Raptors win a playoff round. Everything's coming up Toronto. Toronto hit two home runs Tuesday night.

Justin Smoke tied the game in the ninth and won it in the tenth with home runs. It's like Toronto has become a good sports town. Yeah, someone must have sacrificed a virgin somewhere in Ontario, I mean. So the – Oh, as if there's a virgin in Ontario. I was cycling through my brain of all the people I know in Toronto to use them as the joke, like, oh, they killed him. But, like, no, that's not going to work. No, there's nobody.

There's too many tilted kilts. So the point is that here's the thing. The happiest teams I'm happy for, I'm fine with Toronto, whatever, let them get Austin Matthews, he'll disappoint, and then they'll never win, and everybody will be sad. I'm hugely happy for Winnipeg because Patrick Linae is going to be a 50-goal score playing with Shafley, and I'm super happy that Winnipeg's going to be great. And both Winnipeg and Buffalo are closer to winning a cup. than are Edmonton and Toronto. Oh, for sure. You know, who picked ahead of him.

And then the other team I'm really happy for, in kind of a so-so way, is Columbus. Obviously, they go up and take the third pick, but it would have been so much cooler if they had gotten the first pick because it would have been Yarmokeka-Lions' grand plan of trading Ryan Johansson for Seth Jones and then getting Austin Matthews.

Like, to see that plan come to fruition would have been really interesting to see. But I don't know, man. And like, I'm super happy for my friends in Toronto that they have hope being sold to them. I'm just interested to see exactly how expedited this process gets. Because everybody assumes that, you know, with McDavid, with Crosby, you know, there's always this notion of it's like the Genesis Project. We talked about before. I shoot it into the dead planet.

It revives the whole planet. And that that's going to happen with Austin Matthews. And, you know, are they going to get stamp codes? Would Tavaris go there when he becomes a U.S.A.? Like, there's a lot of questions about that team that I think are very interesting, but I also think it's based on the idea that just because they've been dog shit and just because the tone and tenor of the coverage seems like it hit peak snark when Kessel was there, that it's now a place people want to play.

And I still don't know if that's true. Okay, A, the Star Trek reboots also sucked, by the way. Chris Pine. Oh, yeah, you're pointing about Chris Pine being a beautiful character actor, like Brad Pitt was a very valid one because if anyone's seen Smoke, Aces. Right. That's really crisp.

He's hilarious. Yeah, he's fantastic. I still can't believe it's the same guy. But, okay. Toronto is everyone, like, so this is how you're going to be able to tell, like,

the Phil Kessel's cynic writers from the other writers. The people that compare Toronto to Edmondson now are the dicks. They're going to be the, they could be right, though. I'm not saying that can't still happen, but they're the dicks. The people that compare them to Buffalo, like you're truly over here.

I think they're in the Buffalo. They're in the Buffalo driver's seat right now because their Eichel, or their Matthews is Eichael, their Marner is Reinhardt, and O'Reilly, I don't know who they're going to sign or trade for, but, like, if they get, like, I still. They don't have a, but they don't have a Ritzelana now. But neither of them really have a goalie. That's the other thing, too. Well, I mean, I still think Jonathan Brunier can be okay. I do.

I know he shit the bed, like crazy. Oh, I know he's okay. That's why they didn't play him for the last month. They played fucking Garrette Sparks. Who I thought was a Rodney Dangerfield movie until I realized that NHL goalie. I think Toronto's, like, next year is going to be bad. And then, like, I think this year for Buffalo is the first time they're going to be able to say, like, we can go to the playoffs. Toronto in two years, depending on what, I mean, again, it's friggin May over here.

It's frigging May over here. Oh, I'm like Andrew Dice Clay doing this podcast all the sudden. Hey, it's a ridiculous duck. The Leafs are on the clock. Oh, Austin Matthews is over here now. Oh. No, I think they're not Edmonton yet. Edmondson had like a bunch of Dufuses run on that place.

Like Edminton just hired Tyler Dello. Yeah. And Toronto is already invested in analytics. They have a guy. Yeah, Edmonton hired Kyle Dubos, who basically is Tyler Dello, but who had an actual GM job in junior. Yes, exactly. Right. Right.

So I think they're in good shape. And yeah, they're at a point where it can all go wrong at any point. And Austin Matthews could decide to quit because he loves life in Switzerland so much that he decides they wants to paint for a living or something. Like, it can all go wrong at a moment's notice. But I like the, I like the, again, Buffalo, Buffalo went from 54 points to like 81. And Toronto's starting off at 69. Nice.

So I just, I'm just, I think they're two years. I've probably given a different year every time I've talked about this. Two years. I want to hear that phone call. Era, it's me, Lou La Merello. Era, why aren't you coming to Toronto? I'm addicted to the chocolate. Sorry to inform you guys.

I know what I'm really important to your plans, but the chocolate here is baller. Have you seen the movie in Bruges? I can just go over there whenever I want. So, listen, somebody, the last thing I want to say on this podcast, which by the way, in case you couldn't tell, free skate this time, no guest. No guess. Unless it's like, you know, the English patient of the podcast. We're just going to go on and on and on.

Nobody wanted to come on the show this week. Well, we almost had a player, but he decided that he would rather not talk about hockey for once, which is good. which is weird. We have plenty of other guests coming up. Don't worry about it. Oh, yeah. We got stuff cooking. Oh, yeah, I got irons in the fire.

Oh, yeah. The last thing I want to say is that somebody, I think it was Ian Vendez of Sportsnet, put forth the idea that the NHL is a better place or that the NHL needs the Maple Leafs to be successful. And it's such garbage. Like, they say the same thing about the Yankees and all the New York teams. They say the same thing about the, the NHL has become a $3 billion industry, right, with Chicago, Boston, L.A., Philadelphia, Pittsburgh as your forebearers, as the teams driving the truck, right? And I know that Toronto is going to make a lot of money with Matthews, and there's going to be people that may have been apathetic.

They'll be back in the fold if they're good. But I'll say, here's what I think about that theory. The NHL is a better place when Toronto fans are more engaged. when Toronto fans are puffing out their chests, there's no better fan base to spar with and to war with than a Leafs fan. Wait, so you're saying that you think hockey is a better place when like Sundeen 13 F.U. Tweet's at you and says Leaves rule, your stupid devil suck. Yes, and I'll tell you why, because as growing up a Devils fan,

there's absolutely nothing better than to hear any argument, any argument from your foe in a debate, any argument. Devil's stuck. Barador is fat. Go Beezer. Or go Richter. And then all you have to do is come back and say 1940.

And that's the beautiful thing. To have a fan base that is going to be puffing out their chest that is literally going to walk through life every day with the NWO theme playing in their heads, because that's how badass they are that they got this pick, to just be able to say

yeah, but 1967, it's pull the pin and then there goes the balloon. So I think when Ian says the league's better when Toronto's good, it's because they're an original

six. And also because he works for their boss. And also because he lives in Ontario, but you're you want, you think it's a better place because people will fight with each other and call each other names on the internet. I think you two are coming from, coming at this argument from two different places altogether.

Well, that's simple. You see, David, some people just want to watch the world burn. I was going through the jungles of Toronto, and I saw a kid playing with a puck as big as a ruby. I realized that the owner was given away the pucks that he was stealing. The Oilers were going to get the top pick, but then they blew the bloody doors off. Where's Michael King in presence of all time?

She was only 12 years old. I can't do that. Those two guys that do the impression of the best. Oh, on the trip. Stephen something or other. Say waste. Last thing I'll say about the draft, obviously, is that the hockey gods proved, tried to do their best to disprove their existence by giving Connor McDavid to the Oilers. And then they proved their existence by giving them the fourth pick.

The moment I saw the Oilers logo at number four, I jumped from my couch. and did a happy dance. I was sad. Because I was so happy we didn't have to see that again. I was sad. Why? Oh, you see, you want to watch the world burn.

I want to watch the world burn. Some men just want to watch the Oilers draft first every year forever. No, I did not want to see that. I just, I want to go through there. I at least wanted them to be in the top three where they cut the commercial, and it's like Shani and it's like Kekelai and it's like Cheorelli.

And it's just like the look on Shani's face of just like, oh, this fucking guy. No, God. I tanked this whole season for this. guy, don't do this to me. Just to at least have that tension going on in the commercial, it would have been sweet. Yeah. And last thing I want to say about it, now, the real last thing is, if you're the NHL and you

change the rules of the draft lottery twice now in two years. That was by design, by the way. They did it once because they knew it was the McDavid draft, and they had to really do something drastic. And then they did it the second time where they had three different lotteries for the first second and third picks. And the team that legit openly, who's tanking over here, who? Oh, yes, sir.

Me, me, me, me, I'm taking, I'm taking, Mr. Shanahan. Like, the team that totally tanked won the lot. They got to feel shitty about that, don't they? I don't, I don't, again, I'm at a point with tanking where, like, you know how we as media people will get annoyed and, like, a guy won't come out and talk after a game and, like, no one else gives a shit? That's how I feel like it is, but tanking at this point where, like, media people are like, like, fucking Mike Harrington. Jesus fucking Christ, enough already with you and your fucking... Buffalo News, yeah. He's like, oh, look at the ads.

attitude in Toronto. Everyone thinks it's great. Buffalo, we got killed all the time in the city. Buffalo played Arizona at the end of the last season when they were battling for the last spot for the guaranteed one-two spot. Arizona scored an overtime in Buffalo and the crowd fucking erupted in joy because they were so on board with it. So if the fans are on board with it and the team shows it can be a great thing, you know, got a Michael, got him, Matthews, why are people still like the gold plan? Fuck the gold plan. Fuck the gold plan. Where you are, where you are, where I thought you were going with it is sports writer, it's a sports writer problem because guys literally feel like their soul is slipping out of every orifice in their body when they watch a team that's tanking

because they have to go to every game and cover every game and try to cover a team that's intentionally trying to lose and try to write about it like it's a real sport. No, but like, I find that like doing this on like a national level for a long time, like it's just the same storylines all the time. Like you walk into a building where they're like, fuck, we're going to lose everything. every single thing that we could possibly lose this year. Like, that opens up all new storylines and, like, all new things to write about. And, like, I just don't get... And it's just the attitude of, like, oh, everyone hated Buffalo doing it. They were...

No, they weren't. I mean, like, yeah, there are some people, but they're fucking idiots. Yeah, it sounds like sports writers would really like to have all their narratives and their stories contained into the Black Castle. But you would like it to be all over West... Castle Black, you mean? All over Westeros. Oh, Castle Black. Castle Black!

That's what we should do, is... Castle Black! We should sit down and... watch all 51 episodes in a row with sneakers in the room, of course, otherwise I don't want to do it. And, like, I want to watch, I want to watch you, because, like, you, I'm sure, like, you just know stuff that's happened.

In all honesty, and I don't want to undercut the bit we did. I saw, I saw, I saw the Red Wedding episode, and then I saw the one with the Winter Walkers. The White Walkers? Sure, whatever the fuck. The one with the Red Wedding is why I'm annoyed. Of course I'd love it. I was, I played D&D as a kid. Like, of course

I'm going to love this shit. But I've just never, I just felt so, it's like how I had to watch the wire in one sitting because everybody hyped it up so much and it was like season three I'm like I don't know what the f like I was watching the Sopranos right like I wasn't watching a wire and I didn't know what anything was going on so I had to kind

of like sit and really dedicate time to it and I could barely dedicate time to catch up on daredevil which again I will never watch because of the Ben Affleck version of it but tanking's awesome what was her name again nachos nachos grande nachos Electros.

Electros nachos? Yeah. The rain fell on her face and he saw how beautiful she was until the rain started falling on that nanny's face. Ah, true story? Dog, is his new movie out.

It's about a lawyer. He's a blind crime fighter. He fights crime even though he's blind. True story? You can't be fighting crime with you're blind? How are you going to know? Hey, you're going to throw a punch, Mikey.

You're going to miss everybody. Dog, his senses are heightened. His senses are very heightened. He's getting, he knows, or karate or something like that. You know what dad devil was? Evil can evil. I was a dead devil. Not this guy. Not a blind lawyer.

Speaking of blind guys, Rick D.P.H. He didn't see it coming when I dropped the elbow on him. I'm number one here in New York. Yeah, for those of us who don't know you're talking about, Mike Francesa is feuding with Rick D.B.H. They're both radio personalities here in New York. Islander goalie. Getting paid $1.5 million a year

to not play. put down his size with every shoe and said, you know, when it comes to radio, you're you, I'm gaudy how. And I'm gaudy how. You're you. Imagine like to be like, like, say if somebody were to like rip us, they would be like, you're, you know, Zach Rinaldo, I'm Gordy Howe. He actually used the person he was ripping as the example of the bad hockey play.

If like cereal said, you're you and we're Bill Simmons. Yeah. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, how does that, how does that show again? What would be the hierarchy? Who would be the Gordy Howell podcasting? Simmons, probably, right? No, well, I mean, like, in sports, but like, whenever you go to, like, the overall podcast things, it's usually like a... Serial and embedded. Some sort of like, yeah, yeah, embedded. I don't even know what that is.

Anyway. Is that like the undercover boss thing? By the way, thank you to everybody who's made this podcast a very quick and early success. As you probably heard, there's an ad in front of the show. You're welcome. That's super exciting. Oh, you met the listeners. And we thank you for all of your patronage to him.

Now allowed that to happen so quickly. Other podcasts they may or may not have taken part in over the years Didn't have the benefit of advertising And this one had the benefit of advertising very quickly So if you do get a chance You need or buy tickets Do that thing, the seek geek soupy thing that we talked about Because it'll only give us

Maybe they'll give us a second podcast a week You know and you know fuck stuff up Oh yeah Their fees are ridiculous What have they ever done for me besides nothing? Yeah Nothing. Okay good Nothing

Anyways so thank you again for everybody participating. We're going to try to get that Reddit community, the Puck Soup Reddit community up and going and thriving more. But thanks for the people that have found their way there so far. And people have asked about like shirts and shit and we'll check in with Nerdist on that. We don't know.

They're the ones that are going to have to make it. Yeah, there's all kinds of rules and contracts and like language and stuff. Yeah, I had to get my Puck Soup tattoo on my penis. Blurred out. And all the promotional photos we did, right? Yeah. Same thing for me. I got the back, lower back

one. It looks good, but once we get it It's awkward because usually it just says pee-p instead of puck soup. Because it's so small. That's the joke. Because that's the, anyways. It's cold. Yeah, because it's very cool. So thanks everybody for listening and participating in everything else. I'm Greg Wyshinsky of Yahoo Sports. You can read me on Puck Daddy. You can follow me on

Twitter at Wichinsky. I do the America versus Wichinsky podcast on Sportsnet. You can find that on iTunes in my book. Take your eye off the puck. is still available. Well, I mean, it'll just, it'll be available. I mean, I think shit doesn't leave Amazon doesn't it's there forever. Yeah, anyway. It's on Amazon and everybody, thank you for buying it and liking it so far. Somebody sent me a picture of

a kid that was going to become a hockey coach in Finland that was reading it on a train. And all I could think of is, he's going to get up in front of that team and make some arcane pop culture reference. He's going to be like, you know, trying to figure out what kind of Ford you are is like wearing the Harry Potter sorting hat.

And I'm just like, fuck, man, what have I done? Here's what I would do. If you're looking at a goalie and there's not a lot of places to shoot, imagine an opening the size of a wamp rat. The size of a wamp rat. And then, you know, really visualize hitting that target, even though, you know, there's a lot of pressure on you. Or, you know, switch off your target computer,

and they're going to be like, what's wrong? And you're like, I'm all right. Anyways, what do you have to say? I don't know. I got nothing. You're Dave Loso of ESPN. I'm Dave Lozo of Vice, ESPN, Uprocks, the comeback. Uh, you know, go to my Twitter.

I got links in there. You'll find something I do. He's also doing The Chronicles of Vin Scully. I haven't done one in a while. Yeah, you have to do one. The Vin Scully, the Vin Scully tweets. Because, like, Vin Scully, by the way, has gone on a rance about beards. Jose Fernandez playing with rocks in Cuba.

And I'm at a point where I'm like, I can't make up anything that's weirder than that. Because I feel like he took the challenge and he's just like, oh, yeah, Zelda? I talked about Zelda. Watch this whole entire bit about beards for five minutes. I haven't Zelding since you were in diapers. All right. Go ahead and take them home, David. Can we bring back Clearly Canadian? I would really, really like a glass, a bottle of Clearly Canadian.

It was the greatest flavored, zero-calorie bubbling water, whatever you call it, sparkling water. And if we can bring back 3D Doritos, too, the little, like, remember those little 3D? They come in, like, a tennis can. Those were good, too. If you come back, we would absolutely have you sponsor our show. We would do ads for you. And if you want to just mail me a case of clearly Canadian, that'd be great. I'll tweet about it, too.

So this sounds like when women go on eBay to find discontinued shampoo and conditioner. It sounds like you want to maybe somebody on eBay can... I looked. You looked on eBay for a case of Clearly Canadian. Because somebody tweeted at me that they brought Clearly Canadian back like a year ago. So I'm like, oh, there must be some somewhere. And it was just, no, nothing. Real quick.

Empty bottles. That's one of my favorite things in life is when something is discontinued. and you just randomly find it. And the two examples always give is my bowling alley and, technically Aberdeen, but Maddoin, Aberdeen, in New Jersey, my bowling alley had a crystal Pepsi machine well after Crystal Pepsi was discontinued. And you're just like, did you get it? Oh, of course.

What are you kidding me? And then the other thing was the McDonald's at the University of Maryland. Do you remember the Arch Deluxe? Oh, yeah. Real tasty burger, right? Like, they would make the Arch, they made it at the Arch Deluxe like maybe a year after McDonald's discontinued. it and you're just like how and why and what's the shelf life and sauce and everything else but

I don't fucking it's like two in the morning okay so I just came back from the frats so clearly Canadian Doritos McDonald's and Pepsi hit us up hit us up we're here we can promote your products for for very little money but that's the show I think we're done thanks for stopping by thanks oh you got to say your your sign off that we haven't done since the first week what's my sign off from the teens oh no I can't do that anymore You could do two parts of it. Yeah, I didn't realize what one of those men. You could do the lit and the loyal part, I think.

Yeah. All right, everybody, everybody stay loyal and be lit. Bye. Now leaving nerdist.com.