Puck Soup - Pour Your Own Damn Beer

Episode Date: October 5, 2018

Greg and Dave explore the horrors of self-serve beer at hockey games, Tom Wilson's 20-game suspension, Brad Marchand's unique leadership, the Senators giving away tickets and hugs, Patrik Laine and Fortnite, the Fast & The Furious on the Moon, and can Dave survive the NHL 2018-19 Official Team Slogan Quiz? Brought to you by Sonos and Seat Geek! 

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That's 1,800flowers.com slash podcast. Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slapshots and goons. We've got sportly commentary to what if you commute. We also cover movies, TV shows, it's in tunes. It's your weekly bowl of Hockey and Nancet. Pogsoup. I'm Greg Wyshinski, and we're at ESPN. I'm Dave, and so I'm the same place.

Yeah, and you're in Huck Soup. We're in your office. It's our office. No, but it's like specifically where your desk is. We're all part of the same team. First of all, you've spun tales of your time at NHL.com and having a desk. Yeah. And I always found it curious because in the time that we've really gotten to know each other,

your desk has been your couch. And your computer has been the Price is Right on your television for the most part. Still have not seen an episode of Price's Writer. Let's Make a Deal in months. Are you able to create your genius? in a sterile office environment such as the South Street Seaport ESPN office. How dare you call my office sterile? I can either call it sterile.

Sterile. It's more like virile because of how much energy flows through here. Oh, I'm like because you're saying you were close to the river, and that's why it's very viral. Oh, virile. Deerile. Oh, okay. Gotcha. A lot of invigorated ideas in the bullpen.

I've never been down here before, and like there's escalators. There's escalators. There's elevators. There's the building glows at night, which I think is important because like boats might hit it. I don't know. How that works. After seeing your office, I imagine it's a situation where you guys are all plugging away and you're on the internet, you're on Reddit, you know, trying to steal jokes from Reddit. And then like Katie like burst through the door and she's like, I need five jokes about Josh Gordon right now. Yeah, that's exactly how it works, man. And then like you all scurry and start throwing around papers. Is that how it works? Yeah, we like all get up

and we go to a special room and then we just have like a big whiteboard and it says Josh Gordon question mark and then we just start shouting out stuff that's exactly I mean it's amazing how you have pegged this without even just being here for the first time what about a play on Flash Gordon you know the old comics character what if he's a Gordon's fisherman oh because now he's in new England where there's fishing and men I don't know and then and then Katie just kicks over garbage cannon is like who wrote this joke about Tom Brady eating stem cells I'm a Boston fan. She immediately knows it's me.

Like, grabs you by the throat. You know, it's a whole thing. All right. Listen, the start of the NHL season was this week, I was blessed to be in Washington, D.C., to with my own eyes, witness the raising of the Stanley Cup banner. As I said to a friend

of mine who says in Section 417, I was still convinced up until the banner touched the ceiling that they were going to find a technicality on which to take away the cup from the Capitol's. Ineligible player. Your tweet with quotes around it was jarring when I saw it was like they're raising the quote Stanley Cup championship

I'm like wait what? Are they not doing it or are they really doing it? At some point like right as they're about to raise the banner like Gary Betman comes out he's like I just realized that Abe Poland never signed the franchise Chata you guys don't exist it's like golf where you don't submit your card at the end they're sign your card at the end you never signed it congratulations Vegas

Yeah, exactly. I had to see it for myself. And they raised it, and it was, I got to admit, like, the video they showed before the, during the cup ceremony, the banner raising ceremony, rather, was really impressive because they did not shy away from the total inebriation of the capitals in the weeks that followed the cup. Was the whole highlight video just, just boozing after the cup, or was there actually hockey highlights? It was legitimately the first highlight video I've ever seen that incorporated cell phone footage. and I think that's great. Like it was Oveskin in the fountain. Like, you're watching it on a Jembo Trot. It's like these pristine HD shots of like the parade and the fans and the buses and everything.

All of a sudden it becomes like shrunken down in a letterbox. Some vertical video. Somebody filmed Ovechkin in a fountain. It was really well done and I thought it embraced the fact that's what made it great was the fact that it was so cathartic for them. How do you feel about the fact, as I pointed out, that they did not reference Barry Trots in any way, shape, or formed during the ceremony? Was that okay by you?

Some people said, you know... They should have showed him in the video part of it, I think. They didn't even show him in the video. Like, you know, that dude kind of dragged your dumbasses to the cup. See, that's the thing, though. Like... Uh-oh, here we go. No, but here's the thing.

That's the hot take alarm. Aha! No, but it's my... It's not my hot take. There's a contingency... Is that the word? Contingent. Contingent of Capitals fans that believe that they won despite Barry Trots.

Like Barry Trots was simply just the big hunk of flesh behind the bench and not actually doing anything. In fact, the one decision he made was a shitty one when he started Grubauer instead of Holti to start the playoffs. So they believe that this was all done in spite of him. So why even honor the man now that he's not even there. See, this is why you can't give anybody nice things. Right.

Because they just completely, the guy who had the most wins, most points as a coach the last four years, wins the cup, no one else could ever win. I know. It just seems, it seems, it seems weirdly petty. Like, I've, I tend to believe that they're going to do something for him when the owners come to town.

Do you think so? Maybe, I don't know. Based on that, I think they're going to pretend like he never existed. But isn't like the whole thing, like, you know, he left because of this shitty option on his contract. Yeah. And also because they kind of, I think they probably, here's a, he was fired before the season started.

But also, but also Ted Leonis does to spend money on coaches. I mean, that's the bottom line. He was going to be up for a new contract. he had just won the cup, and they weren't going to pay him. They were like, here, you take this fucking minimum wage contract that you signed because you never thought you were going to win the fucking cup with us, or leave. But like the islanders not paying coaches.

I always understood that because they had no money. Like Ted Leonis has money. He could pay a coach if he wants. You know what kills me? They didn't want to pay the money for the guy that won them the cup, but they installed entirely new concession stands in the Everdeck of the arena. Like, every new, every concession sand is now, like, the themed and beautiful and pristine. And, like, doesn't look like there's been any mice there?

I said that as this person is. You know. Yeah. But they couldn't pay a coach. Couldn't pay a coach. Speaking of that. Oh. Wow.

What a segue. What a set up. Self-serve beer at the Capitol. For those who haven't seen, the Capitals became one of the first teams in professional sports to install self-serve beer at the arena. And it is exactly as it sounds. It's so dumb. Why? Why do you think is dumb?

Why can't, like, first of all, I do not trust people to drive the right way on the road. So I'm going to trust, like, the seven people in front of me to, like, be able to, like, self-checkout, I'm assuming, right? And pour themselves a beer and get out of the way. The Washington Capitals, which, by the way, the total price for the refurbishment of Capital One Arena was $40 million. Couldn't ante you have to pay your coach, but $40 million from Hamburgstein. Apparently they're not paying employees anymore to pour beer. beer, so there's more money saved. Those who want to do their own

beer pouring have to purchase a cup that is marked with a QR code. Then they simply scan the cup, tilt it for an even pour, and pull the handle. Now, this is one of those ideas that's pretty great and abstract. Simple, you just take your own cup.

You bring it over to the beer thing. You tilt it. You pull it down, and lo and behold, a large cup of beer for you to consume, consumer. anyone who's ever seen anyone work a keg? Right. That's not a skill a lot of people have, you know? No, it's not.

It's not. But how is it faster? It's still the same process. Like, I'd rather have an expert who knows out of port. Because you ever get, like, a beer in a stadium, it's always poured perfectly. I like that you consider the people pouring beers at the stadium experts, because, like, it's the same. It's my Taco Bell Pizza Hut thing where, you know, if at the Taco Bell Pizza Hut, you assume Taco Bell is the dominant food, those people are experts. With the Taco Bell, KFC,

they have to spend so much more time on the chicken. They don't know what the fuck they're doing with the Taco Bell. So you believe that the people pouring the beer at the stadium, assuming that they're at a beer kiosk of some sort. They're there with like a... They're at the Goose Island stand. Those are experts. Obviously, they pour like hundreds of thousands of beers

all day. Hundreds of thousands of beers all day. How many beers do you think the guy in front of you in the frigging backstrom jersey who's already hammered completely out of his mind? He's going to be able to pours. He buys six packs. Exactly. That's a drunk hammer dude trying to scan the code. He can't even stand up. He's like, where can I pee? And then he starts peeing in the cup.

And you're like, oh, come on. I completely agree. It's the same principle as those places. And I want to say Panera is one of those places. Oh, I'm, that they make you pour your own coffee. I have no idea how to make my own ice coffee. It's coffee and ice. And I'm a moron.

Yes. The ratios are all wrong. Completely. And like, the ice is all slushy. It's like, I don't know what the hell I'm doing. There's a guy behind me who, like, knows me. He's like, why is this idiot? Like, well, I'll just, you're behind the counter.

Listen, what you're doing? It's a very slippery slope. Here, you could fucking fry your own donut. Here. It's like, it's like Kramer's pizza idea where you make your own pizza. Like, no, that's a terrible idea. You know who I blame for this? I blame fucking, like, McDonald's in places that tried to, like, robotize their whole process.

Like, you just go to the screen. Like, wah-wah does it? You just go to a screen. You don't talk to a person. A mysterious thing. Probably robots or maybe super-intelligent rats. Like rats at too. Tooie.

Like, they're making the food behind the scenes. And there's no interaction with anybody that's human. That's fine. If someone else is making it, they're better at me than making it. Right. That's why I'm paying for them to make it. But that's the first step towards we make it ourselves. That's the first step.

You know, it's a serve of society, Dave. That's what Uber, Lyft. It's all the same. It's all putting it on us. No, but it's not. To go do things for ourselves. A car isn't put it outside that I get in it and drive it home. I'm paying for the service of being driven somewhere.

The Illuminati. the... Oh my God. You really are tired when you came in here today, are you? Here's the other thing about conspiracies. No one believes them until we prove them.

Scully. First it starts with self-pouring beer. And then, lo and behold, there's an alien embryo growing inside of your brain. And then the beer's all foamy. You can't drink it. The Washington Post had a video, courtesy of Capitals, outsider,

of a guy pouring a beer, and it was just like a cup of foam. And it wound up being that the keg kicked, but therein lies the other problem. Yeah, like who goes to get that? Me? A fucking, yeah, right, exactly. Of course it's you. Like rolling into the back of the arena. Here, what you're going to want to do is you want to take this keg,

scan the QPC code, tip the keg. And then simply go roll a new keg up into the machine that you have to unlock with keys you have to get somewhere. It's such a dumb idea. It's such an ad. It seems like you're taking away steps, but really you're just adding problems. When you buy a beer at a bar and they tell you the keg kicked, do you ever take it personally? Because I do. I mean, personally, I think that's smart because you've been drinking the awesome beer.

Everyone else is drinking. Right. But it's like, there should be a way to man. Like, John Tapper, our good friend of the podcast, John Tapper, probably has a way in which you can measure the amount of liquid. Who? John Taff. Oh, Taffer. I was thinking of the fucking.

Jake Tapper. I was still going to think of the beer video game. John Taffer. I thought you were doing the news guy, Jake Taffer. I'm like, he's a friend of the podcast? No, Taffer's the fucking... John Taffer. Is the video game that you play with the barthenders.

Oh, my God. No, John Taffer... Did you get high for you came in tonight? John Taffer probably has a way that you can see how much liquids inside the keg, so you don't have or have to kick the cage. Yeah, like a clear keg or something like that or like something that just measures it. Yeah, but like the thing is... The thing is, though, is like, let's say you're like three back and you can see that the keg is going to be empty by the time you get there.

Yeah. Like, you don't have... You have like a walkie-talkie. like, yeah, I need a fresh keg over here on seven. Like, it's such a dumb idea. Just let somebody, there's certain things in the world that need to be fixed. My beer buying experience at the arena is not one of them. No.

Bring more beers in. Spin your own, spin your own cotton candy. Right. Fucking deep fry your own fucking onion rings, you know. Scoop your own ice cream. Yeah, let me get some nachos and cheese. All right, well, go back there, open the bag, poured into the plastic thing, and then put the cheese on. Wait, I'm going to do it?

I'm going to do it. Like a bag of popcorn, please? Okay, you're going to want to put these little seeds inside of this thing. and now use this scalding hot oil. Let me get some, let me get a cheeseburger. All right, here's the apron. Here's the, here's the spatula. What are we doing?

Now, what you're going to want to do is walk out to the kill floor where the cows are. Now, come on. It's just, we don't need that. John Tapper. The video game is called Tapper. I was thinking about beer. Sure. Yeah.

Yeah. I was talking about Jake Tapper. That's where. I was so, I was like, John Tapper, a friend of the podcast. John Taffer. It's a good show. Taffee. It's a good podcast we got here.

It's a great podcast. I agree. You know who's also great? Tom Wilson. Let's talk about Tommy Boy. Since we last did a podcast, Tommy did a bad thing. Tommy got suspended 20 games for concussing and separating the shoulder of Oscar Sunquist. Tom Wilson, truth, or Devante Smith Pelly, said the separated shoulder means that it was a shoulder to shoulder head, as opposed to a headshot.

I definitely made that argument about the Kutcher-off. fat and then hit in the playoffs? I remember that, yeah. That was like the opposite, though. It was like you hit him in the shoulder, or why has he had a concussion? But I was surprised, though. I was surprised that, like, so many Capitals teammates were like,

wow, this is really bad. Tom Wilson's a good guy. I was really surprised. Yeah, it's jQuery. Teammates defended him. Like, that just never happens in hockey. Never happens. It's weird.

It's weirding the fact that a quarter of Tom Wilson's salary will disappear. Yeah. Kind of, maybe. Yeah, I mean, like, it's weird that, like, no one else seems to think that at all. But, like, these specific guys who wear the same uniform as him were just, like, this is, this is wrong. He's very misunderstood. And now he's going to appeal it, like.

No, but he'll win the appeal, don't you think? Like, here, here. I don't know how it works. Here's the NHL's problem. The NHL's problem is that they went to 20 games, and the reason we're going to 20 games was, we've never had this before. A man suspended four times in 105 games. And, like, to them, it's, like, totally valid, this idea that, like, oh, well, he's fucked up so many times and

a small period of time, clearly we have to give them 20 games, but in every other suspension they've handed out, it's been kind of incremental. And now they're jumping from what was three playoff games for the hit on the penguin, to now being 20 regular season games. And I have a feeling like when he takes it to the neutral arbitrator, I'm sorry, first he has to go to a field of Gary Bettman, who of course will go against what the Department of Player of Safety Center. He's going to be like, you know what, six?

That's the number. my bad, I'll talk to the fellas. Oh, Tom, good news. They put the zero in the wrong place. It's actually a two-game suspension. Like, Batman will sign off on it. Then it goes to the neutral arbitrator. And I think they're going to look at this and say there's no precedent for this to be 20 games for the nature of the hit that he administered.

I go back to this all the time. The precedent, like, there's no precedent. So that means that you can never suspend anybody 20 games. Well, that's what the NHL did this time. They say, okay. This has never happened before, a guy for, guy gets suspended twice in the span of, like, 16 games. Like, this is, this is new, this is new territory,

and we're staking our new, we're staking our claim in new territory, and giving him 20 games. I don't know if it'll hold up to scrutiny, but I do know that the process could play out long enough where he'll get to, like, 21 games, and the neutral arbitrator's like, hey, guess what, it's only 16. Just keep delaying it. Yeah.

Ah, yeah, we're going to, oh, we've got to push this back, actually. The arbitrators, yeah, he's got tickets to a ball game tonight, so we can't make it to the, sorry. I fucking hated the hit. The hit to me, the player safety guys I talked to made the comparison to the hit that was it Patcheretti had on Latang or Latang had on Patch. I think it was Patcherady on Latang and then he got suspended. Then Latang actually came back in the game and scored like the game winning goal later on.

This was a few years back. Barely remember me. To me it was more reminiscent of like the kind of hit that we saw before Rule 48. Like it was like one of those guy releases the puck and then it gets blindsided. And, you know, we saw five or two. stretchers that resulted from hits like that, and that's how we ended up with Rule 48. So it was a nice throwback. Throwback Thursday, it's kind of a moment there for Tom Wilson.

If only, like, there was some way we could have seen this coming and giving him a harder suspension before this, because it was just so out of the blue for Tom Wilson to do something like this. He can't blame anybody. I mean, yeah, I mean, maybe you could have given him six games or suspended him for the Marsha-so hit in the playoffs last year to real. But you know what? It was just not preventable.

Hockey plays. Just a hockey play. Do you think that now that he's lost the benefit of the doubt? You know, like, the player safety was always like, you know, the hockey play, you know, do you think now if he does some shit, like, you're just going to be like, you know what? It was not an hockey play.

Throw the book at you. I mean, I don't know how they don't. Like, what do they go from here, though? Like, when it comes back and, like, his second game after he comes back and he murders somebody, like, is he going to get 50? Well, the way it usually works is that if it has to be sort of the same genre of...

genre. The same milieu. The same milieu of... I'm sorry, that's my drink. There's ice in there. So if he spears a guy, I don't think he's going to get 21 games. Oh, it could be like just jams a stick in his stomach

as opposed to like form to the head. Right. I think it's for that specific, wonderful headshot that he administers on multiple players. But do you think he's going to have like, he's going to have like that Matt Cook thing where he comes back and he's like, look, I've learned my lesson, and he's going to just go out and play like a normal person that's not murderous.

No. No? He's just going to come back at the first game and just... I one billion percent think that he is the guy who sits down, and he's served in 20-game suspension. And someone's like, Tom, are you worried you're not going to be able to be as effective now because you're on the old watch list for the NHL? He's like, I'm just going to keep playing my game. Just going to keep doing what I do, bro. Yeah.

I only know one way to play, and that's hard. And that's what murderous intent. Anytime somebody has to... But here's my thing is like 20 games, a lot of games, he's finally getting paid money. Yeah. And he instantly isn't getting paid the money. I know.

So maybe he's like, all right. That's what Oshy said. He said like, you know, he gets this massive contract and he gets this massive suspension. Yeah, like he's... So 20 games, quarter of the season, was he at... What's he getting $5 million this year?

So like he's $1.25 million? Like, I feel like that would probably make me stop elbowing guys in the head, but... I mean, that's the theory. Like, if you need to suspend the guy long enough where he loses enough money where it becomes apparent that he, you know, I'm, here's, like, I've long been a Tom Wilson, not a, I don't, maybe apologist, maybe defender, I don't know, like I think he's, I think he's,

I think he's a piece of garbage, like Patrick Coletta. Like, I feel like he can play the hockey game pretty good. He's a, he's a top line forward, he can hang with talented players. Oh, he's always a top line for it. He plays top line with the... How do you not call him a top line? He plays on the top line. Oh, is this your...

Backstrom, Verana, and Oshy's actually the top line? Because that's the only argument you can make that that guy's on a top line player. Just because someone's on a top line doesn't mean they're good. That is... Really? I think Alex Burroughs a great hockey player? You think he just played with the Cedines for a bunch of years. I think he was a valuable part...

He was a top-line player. He was a top-line player, and that is exactly why all the veterans in the Ottawa Senator's locker room and ran up to Pierre Dorian and gave him hugs and said, thank you. Yeah. Thank you. Uh-huh. That was the first time I realized that Pierre Dorian was the Iraqi, the information minister.

The Iraqi information minister, there are no bombs here. There are no troops. Pierre Dorian coming out, be like, all of the players, they went up and they hugged me, and they said, thank you so much for getting us Alex Burroughs. Like, Alex Burroughs is exactly the thing that I want you to get, and you got him, and I'm just going to give you a big old bear hug. You know what I'd say, that was pretty much the moment. when we probably should have been like,

ooh, uh-oh, something bad's coming to Ottawa. And I walked right into that locker room, and I said, you know what I got for Eric Carlson? I'll tell you what I got for Eric Carlson, Chris Tierney. And all the players, they just jumped on me, and they started dry-humping me, and they said, thank you, Pierre.

Thank you so much for Chris Tierney. And then you walk up to the players after that, and like, hey, which one of you guys hug Peter Dorian? They were like, who? Hugged? Uh, uh, I don't know. Oh, he's the G. Oh, right, yes. We all hugged him. All of us, one at a time, or all at once.

Whatever he said, we did, sure. What a game. I traded Eric Carlson for a bucket of magic beans, and all the players went immediately to edible arrangements, and they got me all these beautiful fruit flowers. It was just such a wonderful outpouring of love because they knew I did the right thing for the team. So I don't have a captain yet?

They never, did they make more? There's a lot of teams that right now are doing the Sons Captain bit. I can look it up. Andrews Lee, New Captain of the Outers. Captain Jack. Jack Eichael is the Captain of the Sabres. Young, a young captain. Captain Jack.

Get you high tonight. I like young. I like, that's kind of sound gross. I like young captains. I liked when the Capitol stopped dicking around with Chris Clark and Gabe Ovechkin to see. I like when Taves got the C when he was young and Sid got the C. I think that If you're a team of a certain

trajectory Like Buffalo is clearly Trying to climb out of the basement Like give the captaincy of the young guy Who was Gianta before him And they were kind of riding with that one Was it? What was it?

Who was their captain? I forget I kind of don't really pay attention to the sailors Because they're so bad Was it O'Reilly? Oh, maybe it was Ryan O'Reilly Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah

Yeah Bringing all down the Pondale Um Detroit Red Wings vacant. New York Rangers vacant. Rangers are vacant. Who would you give it to, though? Mark Stahl. Yeah.

I guess. These are de facto captain. Yeah, right. I don't know. Senator's vacant. Yeah, that makes sense. Toronto Maple Leafs vacant, but it's basically Tavares. They just don't want to insult Austin. Well, so what are you going to do, though, the entire time they're both there and no one's going to be captain?

They have to give it to somebody. They just give it to Marner. It's just what the difference. Give it the Jake Gardner. Put some more fresher on that guy's flight. Hey, you're the leader now. Go play. Go ahead. Yeah.

You were a minus 95 in the playoffs this year, but guess why? Now you're the captain, too. Congratulations. Oh, my goodness. The Vancouver Canucks are vacant. Yeah, that makes sense. I don't know how you give it to there. Yeah.

Give it to Edler for a year or something. The Vegas Golden Knights, of course, made the cup final last year without a captain and still do not have one. They're still captains? Mm-hmm. Good for them. Who cares his captain, right? Am I right?

I mean, but... To me, like, Derek England's the captain. Right. There's a certain, like, like, Marksthal, be the same way that you'll be the guy. If you're the player that goes out and gives the speech before the first game after the big shooting in your city, like, you're pretty much the fucking captain.

Right, so, like, at that point, they should just be like, well, let's just give him the C. But no. Like, so it's weird now when you look back on that first season in Vegas and, like, people are going to forget, and like Derek Anglin's going to be some guy on the roster. He's not going to be the captain. No.

So in a way, maybe it falls matter. You know, we're going to have a quiz later, the captain of the avalanche? Oh. Is it Landiscag? Landis Cog is correct. Who's the captain of the Columbus Blue Jackets? Ooh.

Yeah, right. I know. Ooh. Oh, it's Brandon Diminski. It's Rick Nash. Still. Isn't that crazy? No, it's Nick Folino.

Oh, right, right, right. He's the captain of the Columbus Blue Jackets. Who is the captain of the Minnesota Wild? Is it Ryan Suter? It's Miko Koevo. Miko Koevo is the captain? Miko Kovu has been the captain since 2009. Boy.

I know. Not a lot of championships under a... Do you know who the captain of our beloved New Jersey Devils is? Is it Andy Green? It is Andy Green. The old guy in the room. Old Andy. Old Ironside.

There's like certain guys you just think are captains. The St. Louis Blues captain is... Ooh. Mm-hmm. Is Perangelo? It is. He got it after they... After David Backus signed a giant free agent contract with Boston.

Yeah. He's also getting paid $6 million a year. I was watching Back his play in that game against the Capitals on opening out. I'm like, come on. What was that? What was the fucking thinking there? Grit. Yeah.

Jam. Determination. Who's the Captain of the Sharks? Oh, it's Pavelsky, right? That's correct. And finally, who is the captain? This is a Freshie. Mm-hmm.

Of your Carolina Hurricanes. Um, I just want to point out that Bill Peters is 0-1 and lost at the Canucks by three goals. Carolina Hurricanes Captain It is I feel like I know this I follow Mike Sunheim on Twitter And tweet stuff I don't really see it

Okay There's a lot of kids on the team Only a couple guys That might be captain material The answer is Can we'll say it at the same time ready One Two

Three Victor Ask Is it not Victor Ask? It's not Kevin Dinian It's Justin Williams No Yeah, he's a captain. I thought he wasn't on the team anymore.

That's what I was going to say. Hey, listen. If they make the playoffs, there might be a game seven. You need that. You need hit that man on that wall. Oh, man, I will go back to that 2012 playoff run. Oh, Jesus. That's right.

Playing third line minutes, scoring goals against week competition, while Copaard, Dowdy were just carrying that team and neither one of those guys won the cons money. Loud and Clear, though. I'm not mad about that, though. Your captain. Justin Williams. And speaking of loud and clear, if you want to hear,

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And I'll be able to hear it in the bedroom. Wow. The dulcet tones of Dave Lozo. Yeah, you don't want that. In my bedroom, babe, be. I've watched sports of your place. We've enjoyed the sound. Yeah, the sound in your living room.

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That's exactly what you sounds like. At checkout, if you qualify. That's sonos.com, up and running to see if you qualify for the Sonos expert delivery to set up your home system. Sonos is a really kick-out speaker, and you should dig it. You know who also kicks ass? Brad Marchand.

Brad Marchand, baby. I really respect Brad Marchand. Let me tell you why. Oh, please. He's a ma'amstanding citizen. Here's the thing is, like, when you score a goal, you need to have the appropriate level of happiness. That's right. Depending on the score, depending on the game.

And when you score a seventh goal to make it 7-0 at home on your banner-raising night, I think you're allowed, like, one fist pump. But if it's like a second or third one and you do it again later, like you completely deserve to have your face busted open and destroyed because that's just not acceptable. And you know me, I love it when somebody's really talented and does a cool thing and then gets beaten for it. So thank you, Brad Marchand, for policing the game the way it should be.

You know, I detect your sarcasm. Oh, is it coming through? I've got no problem with what he did. He's like, why? How? Because you don't fucking showboat at 7-0. He didn't showboat. He took a twirl.

He took a twirl in front of the Bruins bench, did Lars Deller. He skated past it on the way to his own bench to high-five his teammates. He was a little too happy. He was a little too happy about it. Yeah. Can't have that. Floated. Because if Radamarshan didn't do that, man, I'm telling you right now, the fans would have been upset.

They would have been like, hey, no. Don't do that. The thing that's weird is that, like, why does it fall up on your 30-plus goal score? Because he's... Because I guess he was, like, on the bench. Because, like, he... So, Lars Eller kind of, like, takes a route where, like, he's going down the red line, and he's maybe, like, there's, like, two Bruins he's facing.

And then, like, he does the little hand-twirl thing towards his bench. But when he does it, he was still kind of lined up with the Bruins bench. And the whole thing is just a scam to get the Bruins fired up, and we're going to not sit down and set for next game. Bruce Cast that he said, that's good. Instead of Marchand. He's a proud guy. He's a proud boy.

Well, you know if you're proud, uh, how about this? How about if you're proud, why don't you just not get your ass kick seven nothing? Why don't you come out and play good hockey? I think Eller celebrated a little on the seven nothing goal. This is Cassidy.

I think that's his prerogative. And Marche let him know that that's not acceptable. That's that. We move on. Again, two things here. First, if you have a problem with what Marchand did, He got a instigator, he got a misconduct, he got five for fighting. That really hurt them in a 7-0-0 game with six minutes ago.

But these are the things in place. I don't like this idea that every time someone doesn't like what somebody does, pretty much based on who that person is, now we're going and crying to fucking player safety like me going to complain to the manager at a fucking Burger King. Oh, the referees didn't do enough. Do more. Hey, if the manager at Burger King beats my ass because I really enjoyed my seventh burger while I'm sitting there, That's my business and not his business. You know, call me Neanderthilic.

You're Neanderthalic, yeah. It's hockey, man. It's the bullshit nonsense of hockey. That's not hockey. Listen, not hockey is beating up a guy after a clean hit. Hockey is beating up a guy because he's gloating in a 7-0 game in front of your bench. It's all stupid. It's not stupid.

It's all stupid. It's the joy of this game, the joy of this game that if you are too happy about something and you rub it in somebody else's face, you might get punched for it. Imagine if we apply this to the rest of society. Wait, are you now counterpointing your own point? Or are you saying that people should be beat up on the streets for being happy? What I'm saying, Dave, is that I am in favor of the purge one night. Okay, the purge is a whole other argument.

But like, let's go to football. Let's go to a game between the Browns and the Jets. I would rather not revisit that game. Isaiah Crowell scores a touchdown. And he wipes his ass with the ball. Ball throws the ball on the stands because he's just, he's mad. So do you feel like on his next carry or whatever he should have had this shit kicked out of him by somebody else? I think they should have had a football fight where they both grab each other's face masks and jostle each other violently.

And then they start just pushing each other even though they're all wearing pads. You know, a real football fight. But you think Marchand should get suspended? No, but he fought a guy who wasn't really fighting. To use your, to use your comparison, uh-huh. Crowell was given a 15-yard penalty and it fucked the Jets. Right, but like, but like, he didn't have to, he didn't have to get gridiron justice.

Well, that's the difference in hockey and football. Exactly. And which sports are way more popular than the other again? I'm just saying. Like, even football's like, hey, you can now celebrate in the end zone if you want. Remember where that? What part of the country are you talking about? I'm sure there's pockets that hockey's more popular.

I mean, like, okay, North Dakota. The Seattle. I don't know, it's probably a lot of Packers fan for Dakota. Yeah, I'm just, I mean, we talk about this a lot here where it's like every, like, the sports that let you show joy are usually the more popular ones. The comparison I've seen was people were like, well, if Max Domi gets suspended. That's what I was thinking is like if Domi got five preseason games. But Domi got suspended because he was punching a guy in the face for basically giving him a love tap with his stick and a defensive play in the corner.

This is if you know the old school fuckers in player safety are not going to look at this and be like, oh, he beat up a guy who showboated in a 7-0 game. He didn't showboat. God, if Brad Marchand never fought him, you would never have thought. again about that large dollar celebration ever again. It wasn't, he didn't like he didn't drop his stick and be like, ah, it's too hot. Ooh, oh, he didn't like go by the Bruins bench and like point out all of them and

like you, me, he just skated past a day. Brad Marchand beat him up before he could do any of that. Again, I go back to this all the time. Hockey players, the toughest players in the world, but yet they're kind of babies. But the other thing too, and this is really my biggest problem with this stuff. You know, I like TJ Yoshi. I think he's an interesting

guy. I like talking to him after games and stuff. Can we stop with this fucking false equivocation? Like, this is the second time he's tried to bring in somebody else with what-aboutism when Tom Wilson's gone and done something shitty. Like, after the game last night, O's she's like, I think it's unfortunate for Tom that the league is making an example out of him. They set the standards. They want to get this dirty stuff out of the game,

which I think at least Tom's play was on the ice, and he was hitting the guy that had the puck millic seconds before. And then you can see it a night the sucker punches that Lars took in. So they kind of set the standard. Marshan has history, and we trusted they'll do it. what they're supposed to do and take care of this. Give me a fucking break. Come on.

My guy got 20 games. They should get this guy too. No, no. I think that makes a lot of sense. It's weird, though, again, how his teammate is the one that's been wronged, but his other teammate who got punched in the face deserves the job. I don't know. It's just hard to figure out why teammates always side with their teammates in these situations.

But what about, what do you think of Tom Wilson's suspension? What about Bradmore's a show? Man. Well, that's not... Then again, that's what everyone does. Everybody does that on Twitter. It's dancing very close to what about our emails. What about... I was going to start singing,

what about me? It isn't fair. I had my head down. I'm a hockey play here. Listen, I... What Marchand did was shitty, and it's a shitty thing that somehow will equate to leadership.

And if you want to believe him and say, oh, he, he, You know, I've seen a lot of people point out, oh, same Brad Marchand? No, no, no, no. Now he's virtuously a prick. You know, he's sticking up for his team in a prickish way versus just being selfish. Licking someone in the face, selfish, beating a defenseless man with your fists, that's leadership. Here's the thing.

7-0-0-0. Brad Marchand jumps him, punches him, game end 7-0. Currently, the Bruins are up 2-0. Now, you could say that they're up to nothing because they're playing the savers. Or you could say they're up to nothing because Brad Marchand lit a fire. That's what I'm talking about. Clearly it was the fire. You can keep your Fenwick's and your courses.

I worship at the altar of Big Mo, Momentum. That momentum carried over. So here's the thing about momentum, though, when you're playing back-to-back nights. You have to get it in your carry-on bag because you're leaving and going to another city. You have to. And so going from D.C. to Buffalo, I think momentum carries there because it's on the same time. zone. I don't think momentum goes from like Pacific to Eastern. So no. Just smart, smart play by the yeah. It really, it's all about the jet stream really at the end of the day. Oh, yeah.

You hadn't seen the Islander's third jerseys before we did the show and then they showed them to you and your thought was? Like, I like the logo. With the stick with the the strapeys that represent the dynasty. Colors not so much. The colors are just, uh, there's, I was saying there's something there. I feel like, I feel like that's like the, that's like the second draft where you're like, all right, you're getting there. Now, let's work on the, the patterns here around the logo. You've nailed the logo, but I don't like their ass. Looking at this thing, like, it's

like white shoulder pads, and the logo was there with the four things, and the whole bit. I don't know, like, I just feel like, I feel like it's too close to what they already wear, and I like a third jersey to be really different from what people, the teams normally wear. No, it's not

terrible. I'm not going to complain about it on, like, game nights or whatever, but, like, I think it's like, I feel like where it's, like, the red and white stripe near the elbows, they should have just went with one or the other as opposed to both of them. You know what the Islander should do is they should take the third jersey and put the Statue of Liberty head on it as a big fuck you to the Rangers? Like we could have it too.

We're fucking New York. You can't just claim the Statue of Liberty. And then the devil's... And then the devil's taking it. But we actually own. Technically, it's on our side of the river. It's in our waters. Yeah. And then like we have like a big Statue of Liberty tournament at the end of the year. Yeah. A little round robin. A ladder match to see who's the real Statue of Liberty Jersey. A ladder match. On skates.

God. I'm not going to look at the line, I would watch it. By God, he keeps chopping through the ladder with his skates. No one can climb them. Speaking of fun, so the Vancouver Canucks tried to ruin fun by banning Fortnite on the road. A Bo Horvatt confirmed. Confirmed.

That Fortnite has been banned. The huge news story. It's huge news story. It was first reported. by Michael Delzado, you know, whose focus is always on hockey, that they were going to ban Fortnite so they can better, they can better donned on the road.

And then it was confirmed that they actually did it, which led to our sweet boy, Patrick Lainey, putting up his two cents. Noted gamer, by the way, Patrick Lainey, a man who needs not to go and dine with his teammates. We prefer to sit in the hotel room and play copious amounts of call of duty with his friends back in Finland and obviously has ruined his career to the point where he's probably going to win the Richard

this year. Yeah, you score 50, you can do whatever you want on the road, right? Patrick Lennay said, I think they just needed something to blame after last year, and we kind of made a dear lift with playing that like that. We can give up our PlayStation so we're not going to take them on the road, but I don't think that's going to happen. And also, you know, I invented many of the video gaming systems you're familiar with your Xbox and your PlayStation 4 and also your Nintendo Switch, which I thought

would be very good for a handheld for into planes to use in the handheld and also played in Mario Parties and all those faithfuls spoutoons as well. My great grandfather in Finland was a great cricket player and he would go on the road with backgammon and play

backgammon in his hostel and the team was very good so they didn't care if they didn't play black gammon or you know they had the abacus they used to do math in their rooms and play with the abacus. Math and math math can be fun. Maple leaves forward Zach Hyman, Captain Material, said, told the Canadian

press, I don't think Fortnite's the problem. I think that you can get addicted to anything. If you're sitting there playing Fortnite for 12 hours a day, what a strong man. Who's playing? I played 10. I don't know. At least 10 hours. I was going to say, I feel like anyone who plays Fortnite plays it a lot. Like no one's, no one just goes like me. I played it six times. I didn't kill anybody. I was like, it's stupid. I'm going to play anymore. Besides that, people play it a lot. If you're sitting there playing Fortnite for 12 hours a day, it's probably not the best thing for you. But if you play it like a normal person, one or two hours a day,

then you're fine. Two hours a day. Hours a day. Here's a kind of a normal person. Like if I called up my dad, like, what'd you do today, dad? Oh, you know, I cleaned the gutters. You know, went up to the milkbox and got a bacon and a cheese sandwich sandwich.

I played Fortnite for two hours like a normal person. Just a regular day. But, okay, explain this to me as someone that doesn't play the whole Fortnite thing. Oh. Like, it used to be where. It was just you playing against 89, 99 strangers. No, no, no, you could always play as a team. That was why I had no problem with it.

That's what I mean. Like, if you and, like, you and, like, five of your teammates are playing, you can play for me at the same time, right? Yeah, of course. So, like, what's the problem if you're doing that? Or you're just like... I'll tell you what the problem is, is that Michael Delzado doesn't play Fortnite,

and he sees all these guys in their hotel room. They're having a grand old time. They're knocking back beers. They're playing Fortnite. They're getting the loot and building forts and shooting people and stuff, and Delzato's like, what are you doing in there? What are you doing that in there? What are you playing Carl Duty?

What are you doing in there, huh? Nobody wants to play Mario Kart with him anymore, so he's just like, no one can play anything then. Come on, guys, I'll be told. Just play in my room. You guys want to play FIFA? No, yeah, we are playing Fortnite in here. It was playing the Fortnite, so building the forts, getting in the forts.

The forts are you in my room playing FIFA. I'm going to be Brazil again against the computer. That's not even that old, is he? like 28. None of these guys are old. Yeah. Like, just learn how to play Fortnite and hang out with your buddies. I think if Yager played Fortnite, he'd just be like the best right away.

He'd be like fucking ninja. He would just be like the best. He would just grab the controller and it would glow in his hands. I miss Yager. I just, I don't know. It's just, it's just, it's too. It's just like, funny how like before the season starts, like, it's like a week of gritty. Yeah.

And then it's, and now it's Fortnite. And I feel like once we get to like next week, we'll be talking hockey all the time. That's my thing. I think as long as you're watching episodes of BoJack Horseman, like a normal person, you know, like two hours a day. I feel like that's more normal, though. They're playing Fortnite for two hours. That's like four episodes of a TV show. I think people do that.

I think we have to, you have to factor in as like at least 25 minutes of that is on the toilet. So you're kind of... Oh, you're feeling like it's spaced out, not two hours all at once. I don't think it's a two hour block. Okay. Do you? I don't know. I don't know how people play this game.

I feel like a lot of your social media. poster about you playing If you looked at Zach Hyman's Brett Kavanaugh calendar, it's like skis with Austin Matthews and then two hours

like a two hour fortnight block each day. I guess. Well like how does every, every fortnight is like our game is like quick, right? So like you... Depending if you dot but for you it was quick

because you sucked at it. No, but even if you win it it doesn't take more than like 15 minutes. I would say it takes about maybe 20 minutes at the most. Right. So you work in, that's a lot of Fortnite.

Well, Plus, you got to wait right before, like, everyone loads up into the hotter balloon or whatever. Maybe he's right. Maybe two hours a day or four nights. Maybe it's not that big a deal. You do an hour, like, during lunch, then you do, like, an hour before sleepy time? Right. Right.

You play before bed. You play, like, you know, on the way, on the bus, maybe to the games. That's, like, 20 minutes. Yeah, that's good point. Or on the plane? Like, Sid and them used to play, like, call duty on the plane together. It was very exciting. Or Navy Seals, wherever the fuck they played together.

I'm kind of on team line I here where he's like they needed something to, to blame it Yeah. You sure it wasn't just the bad hockey players? Nope, Fortnite. But again, it's just like, it's this notion of like, you're like, you guys don't want to be part of the team. You don't want to come to the restaurant, drink balls of wine, and go harass women at the club.

But I feel like, again, you could go to dinner with your teammates, hang out for a couple hours, then come back to the hotel room and play Fortnite, right? That's right. For two hours. For two hours. Yeah. Okay. If people are coming to the rink, like, dragging and, like, their hands are all, like,

cramped, you know, like when a Chandler or. was playing. I need to talk to America at some point to figure out how shitty he feels. Because this is all stemming back to him reporting that there was that prospect who had his career ruined because he got addicted

to Fortnite. Not going to say who it is, but he was Canadian, he was left-handed, he had red hair, and his mom was named Ellen, but I'm not going to go into complete detail about who it was. We never figured it out, though, right?

No one never figured it out. So whatever he did, it worked. People thought it was the kid on the Canucks, but that was, like, denied, I believe, at some point. Oh, maybe it was then. That's the thing is, like, no one's going to come out and throw their player under the bus, right? No.

Or would they? I don't know how this, I don't know. Maybe they would. But all right. And if we ever get close to identifying who it is, that he could just build a fort. Aft himself. He's very skilled.

Why is it called Fortnite? Does it take two weeks of developing? Because you're building forts and, you know. But it's not, it's a play on like a fortnight, like a Shakespeare. Right. The fortnight. Two weeks.

Is that what it is? Yeah, it's like, Wimbledon's a Fortnite. That's how they always call it the Fortnite. Two weeks. Right. Serena Williams opens up loot crates and builds forts. I see, like, I would watch all two weeks of that. Like, just tennis players building forts and then shooting each other?

No, that's probably a little too grim. Paintballs. Ah, now you're talking. Fortnite Light. Fortlight. Well, if you wanted to go watch a bunch of tennis players build forts and shoot paintballs at each other, and this was actually a thing that you could purchase, I know where you'd go to buy those tickets.

I think I know. What is it again? Seat geek. You know, getting tickets online can be far too complicated. With hundreds of sites and varying degrees of reliability, it's hard to know who to trust. And that's why Seat Geek is the way to go. By searching multiple ticket sites and grading every ticket based on value, Ckeek helps you identify the best seats that fit your budget.

Plus, every purchase is fully guaranteed. Shop with confidence. So you can shop for tickets on CKeekeke. geek with confidence. Whether you're searching for a last minute deal or planning a night out or need the perfect gift, Seekek has you covered. We both have the Seatgeek app on our phones, and that is the way that we use to buy tickets for ball games, for me concerts.

I don't think. What's the last concert you attended? Dave Matthews, what year? Whenever they were at City Field. I think. I don't think I've been to a concert since then. Yeah. I know I'm going to be using Seekkekekekech.

to find some double tickets this year for my kid, my daddy. It's the easiest way. You go and use the Siki Cap, and they have the big colored circles, so you can know exactly which tickets are the best deals. And best of all, obviously, for all of you out there in Puck Soup Land, listeners to this dumb podcast get $20 off their first Sikiq purchase. Just download the Siki Cap today. Enter the promo code Soup.

S-O-P, that spells soup. The promo code soup for $20 off your first. Seeky purchase. Seekik, life's an event. We have the tickets. Yeah, we do. Seatkeek does. Yeah, we do. That's how they do it. It's Seekek. All right. I have a quiz for you.

I'm ready. I'm very excited. People love when I administer quizzes to you. And I have a good one. Originally, the quiz was going to be asking you basic facts about the upcoming, or the current NHL season, knowing that you've been very busy. here, making jokes about all sports. I don't realize Justin Williams was a captain still.

The hurricanes. And trying to catch you in gaps in your memory. But honestly, like, that would be mean. And there's no reason to be mean on this podcast. All right. So let's have fun then. Let's do it. What do you got?

The quiz this week on Puck Soup is the 2018-19-NHL official team's slogan quiz. Oh, Jesus. Every team in their, every team's, marketing department before the season. They sit in a big room with a whiteboard and they write Josh Gordon question mark. No. They write. That's a creative process, Greg. Don't knock it. They write

what is our team slogan going to be? Right. And, you know, sometimes they come up with real clever ones. Like, for example, all caps. Penguins. Oh, capitals. And that was super fun. That was their great slogan. Or, for example, Vegas-Born. Coyotes.

Was the official slogan of Justin Bourne's Bachelor Party in Las Vegas. Yes. Yes. Boom. But other teams make up slogans that are not as good. And so I have a collection of 10 official team slogans. This is not some goof parody thing. These are real slogans?

These are the real slogans for these teams. All right. My goal is three. I'm going to get, no, you have to get six. Six is a D means that you win. You get the D. No, no. I'm not going to get the D today.

You take the D. Love to get the D here, but I feel like I'm going to get the three. All right. Ten slogans. Okay. Six to pass. Eight would be exemplary. And ten out of ten means that you're a slogan master.

Yeah. You could say I went on slogan's run. If that happens. Hello, slogan. I don't even even know what it's about. I always get Logan's run mixed up with Blade Runner. Charles. Slogan.

I'm a dying man. Now my magic store is my Morgan Freeman. God damn it. You're just waiting for me to die. I decided I wanted some pie. Slogan, bring me pie. Slogan. When he was dying at the end of the last one, he was fasting.

He was slogan. Yes. Yes. Okay. Slogan number one. Rise together. Now, you might be saying to yourself, this is extraordinarily generic and you'd be right. Rise together.

Who's official slogan for 2018? And by the way, I found these by visiting every NHL team's website. Big day for you. And most of them had these slogans plastered on the front of their website. So these are the official marketing slogans for the season for these teams. I know I've seen this one of this. Rise together. Rise together.

I think this was their slogan last year. Think about it. Rise together. Rise. Rise. Lord Vader. Rise. I was thinking, Bain.

He will rise. He will rise. In the darkness. Rise together. He will rise. God, rise together. Carolina. No.

Rise together is the official slogan of the Winnipeg Jets. Now, it makes sense when you think about rise, like a jet in the sky. Sure. Whenever I see a plane, I'm always like, look at that plane, rise. Sure. That's normal. That he really good slogan for the Phoenix Suns. Yeah, like, rise together.

That's like coyotes. Like a sun. Yeah. All right. Like a Phoenix rising in Atlanta. Slogan number two. Okay. Sea of Red lives here.

Oh, well, that's Calgary. That's correct. The Calgary Flames, in fact, Sea of Red lives here. Okay. Now you have one of two. Thanks for getting me a freebie. Appreciate that. There's a couple of gimmies on here.

Okay. Yeah, not every team had a cryptic logo, unfortunately. Well, I would just pick the ten most cryptic ones have been like, over ten. And I wanted to get to ten. Not every team has a slogan. Oh. Good for them. The Rangers not have a slogan, right?

Slogan? No, they do not. I feel like they're one team without a mascot. No slogan. Good for them. The Ranger's slogan is, give us a year. Yeah.

It's not a rebuild, but it kind of is. Raise the bar. Raise the bar. Raise the bar. Raise the bar. Raise the bar. So the bars at a certain height, and they're not happy with it.

They are not happy with that bar. They need the bar to be higher. or they want to build some new condos and that old bar in the corner standing in the way so they're going to raise the bar raise the bar is it the coyotes

no raise the bar is the slogan of the Philadelphia Flyers nope when I got that for some fucking reason I thought it was the coyotes or Carolina I was like why is every slogan feel like it's the coyotes or Carolina I have coyote Carolina brain because you know that those are the two teams that have to come up with bullshit marketing slings every year to try to get fans interested

that's where I figured all right damn Our pack. Our pack. It's not the cap. Sounds political. Like our pack. Our pack.

Not like our political action committee. Yeah. That's what I thought it was. We're raising money for our pack. Our pack. Alpaca. Our pack. Minnesota Wild.

In full disclosure, I gave Ruby this quiz earlier. And she also said the Minnesota Wild. Because I was thinking like wolf pack. But what else runs in a pack? What other animal? A pack of wild. Bores. Coyotes.

Oh, fuck. I said coyotes for all the other ones. I know. I know. I'm sorry. See, you're one of four. That's looking bleak. Telling you, I was going for three.

I still think that there's a chance for you to rally. All right. Sharpen the swords. You're just making these up. These aren't real. Sharpen the swords. Sabers? Yes, of course.

All right. You know, I was picturing the Golden Knights at first. I'm so happy you didn't overthink that. It could have been like, oh, the fucking senators are like hideators. They probably have swords. No, sharpen the swords. It's a saber. It's very literal.

Sharpen the swolds. Take warning. What? Take warning. What does that even mean? Who says take warning? Take warning. Oh.

Take warning. Take heed. Take warning. Take warning, Mr. Wade. Take warning. Caroline Hurricanes. That's correct. There it is.

Because you got up because of the hurricane. Hurricane warning. Hurricane warning. I got there. Turns out thinking about the coyotes and hurricanes more than anybody else is paying off for me. So you are. I've ripped my goal. Three for six.

Three, three up, three down. Now we rise. How many of these got rise? Now we rise. Rise together. Now we rise. Now. Now.

Now we rise. Not later. Now we rise. Now we rise. Now we rise. Now we rise. Florida Panthers. The New Jersey devil. Fuck. Like the sunrise. I thought that was... Damn it doesn't make any goddamn sense. Now we rise. What, from hell? Is that what it is? Is that what it is? Yeah, the undead coming back to life. Well, I mean, I think that I'm not the undead, but like the Satan. Like, he's in hell. Oh, just a regular day. A fallen, a fallen angel has fallen to hell. He became the devil.

Sure. Sure. Damn. Okay. I thought I had that one. Be loud. You're right. Okay.

Be loud, wear green. Be loud, wear green. Be loud wear green. Be loud, wear green. So there's only so many teams that have green. There's only so many people that are loud. It's got to be Minnesota, right? No?

Close. it's the Dallas Stars Dallas Stars are Be Loud where the greenest But I guess you're right What in this little wild Do you have

Yeah Oh going back to the wild What on earth Do they do in changing their goal song Yeah they got rid of Let's go crazy right For that It's the wherever goal song they picked

The Islanders had it for a while It's the worst goal It's like oh You had Prince I know You had Prince The worst Like would they like

Okay he's been dead long enough now We can change to this? Like, what? It's Prince. You had it. You had it. It's the worst. And I also love in the tweet, they pawned it off on the season ticket holders. Like the STH voted. Don't add us. But okay. Number eight. I'm sorry, number nine, rather. What am I at three? You have three, right. So you hit your level. All right, let's try it at the 500 here. If you get the last few, you get the five hundred. It's close strong. Okay, number nine, this is our ice. An actual marketing department sat down

in the room with a white board and they're like, let's see. How about this? This is our ice. Columbus. No, but that's a great guess. That feels like a torch thing. No, it's actually the aforementioned Minnesota Wilde. Oh, dude, what are you doing to me? Did you, like, set this up knowing psychologically what I would guess earlier and then, like, come up with the right ones later?

If only I were that crafty, sir. In Minnesota Wild, this is our ice. Makes sense. It's like, it's like our, it's a very sort of quasi-Canadian art. Our ice, our book, our game. Oh, like, every team has ice. All right, that's the last one. Okay.

This one is probably the toughest that it's here. Okay. So this is number 10, the final one. Good luck. Good luck. No, no, no, no. Oh, okay. Okay, ready?

Ottawa Rising. No, it's not. Ottawa Rising? That's the Senators. That's what they came up with? Oh, senators, you guess? That's something to go with. Yeah, it's correct.

I ran out of slogans. I didn't want to use Vegas-born-or-all-caps. How many teams are rising this year? Ottawa's rising Winnipeg's rising The flyers are raising The devils are rising Yeah

And the wild say Hey this rank It's ours You could share it for a while But like at the end of the day It's ours If the thrashers still exist There's a slogan

Could be Andre rising Because he's a falcons receiver Who's really good And left eye burned down his house Remember that? Oh yeah That's right At least the left eye loaps

I forgot about that All right Ottawa, by the way, the slogan Ottawa Rising, they gave away tickets to their home opener. They wrote an email to season ticket holders, and they said, here are free tickets. Put in this promo code, and you can have free tickets to the home opener for,

we have not sold out the home opener, and we would like people to be there. So that's the deal. You know what? I don't mind that. I don't either because it's at least an identification that you're shitty and that you're not going to you know,

make your fans pay full price for what is an inferior product. They'll give you like a Bob Shepard old school giant stadium score update. Okay. This score Justin. No. Blackhawks two.

Senators three. There you go. After one period. Ottawa Rising. I love early season. hockey. No one can play defense yet. It's just back and forth. Take the over. Oh, yeah. Oh, sure.

Yeah, I'm with you, man. I feel like it's actually kind of virtuous. I know there was sort of a lot of pointing and laughing at the I've always said that. Like the coyotes and the Panthers, like teams like that that that can't sell tickets. Like, how does it hurt to just give them away like two hours before the game? But this is at least a little bit different

like in the sense that like, you know, this is a team that's still two years removed from the fucking conference final, which is insane. In Florida's case, it was always a thing of like, oh, well, we just need people to come to this horrific team. You know, like, whatever the reason. They had the valid driver's license deal, or if you had a valid Florida driver's license, you had a free ticket. And, like, I think it's okay to make fun of that because it's funny, but I think it's also a smart idea.

Because, again, if you at least get people in the building to watch your product, because hockey live is different than hockey on TV. Right. Same thing with football is the opposite, where, like, you go to the game for the tailgate, in football, you're better watching on TV. Right. People may buy some sodas, some popcorn. I mean, I understand that you can't do that forever because then nobody would buy tickets

and they would wait for that one hour window every game. But I just think at certain times it's good to do. Yeah. It's a nice bit of, you know, not only sort of like self-evaluation that you know you're shitty, but also like swallowing your pride. Because a couple of years ago, Eugene Monick's like, if you give away tickets, then you're devaluing your fan base. There's no way to build a fan base giving way tickets. Now they're just giving way tickets.

Yeah. I think it's, I mean, I've made a lot of Ottawa jokes. I think that's good, good for them. Smart. Pierre Dorian said that when he announced the team was giving away tickets, all the fans hugged him. Like, every fan in Ottawa ran out, like 15 to 18,000 people ran over, and they hugged him en masse.

And he was sort of in the... Remember the fight that Neo had in the second Matrix movie with all the Agent Smiths converging on him? That was Pierre Dorian, and those were all the Ottawa fans. But they all looked different. They didn't all look like the same, like the Agent Smiths. Boy, boy, sitting across from you when that joke came to your mind and your eyes lit up, but it was a treat.

That's why I do this. For those moments. For those moments? For the callbacks. Oh, sure. That's right. Pierodoria. Yeah.

The Puck Soup question of the week, for those that don't know, was give us which potential Stanley Cup favorite has the biggest chance for disaster. Absolute disaster. You think it's Boston based on some tweets that I've read and seen. You don't consider them a lock for the playoffs. They're such fucking dick sometimes. To be fair, they may have a point with their playoff team. I think they're a playoff team, but are they a lock for the playoffs? They got upset because I said the flyers were a lock.

I think you and I have different perspectives on divisions, because you said something about like the Metro, you were like in that division. And I was like, that division's not great. The Rangers and the Islanders are dormats. Yeah. But like, I mean, I feel like it's really up for granted. Like the caps coming off the cup year. Penguins are getting a little older.

Devils are, who knows? Right. So you're saying the Flyers aren't a lock? Like, I think the Flyers. Are you saying the Bruins are more of a lock than the Flyers? Yeah,

just because it's obviously, it's Tampa and Toronto and then the Bruins and then everything below that. I know you're a big Florida guy. But Florida and the Buffaloes could easily just jump up and take those spots. I don't know about, I mean, it's hockey,

so like, yeah, but like I can see Florida, but Buffalo, come on. Why wouldn't, why don't you know, why aren't you a believer in the buffalo sabers? Here's the thing, when you believe in sabers for how many straight years and they continue to screw you, you got to move on. But not Arizona. I'm still...

Did you not listen to the podcast last week where I said they bought all that IKEA furniture and now they've got molded furniture in their apartment? It's not very good. It breaks easily, but they at least have some. Oh, I thought you were doing a Sidene bit. I think that was a Swedes retiring and buying furniture for the new homes thing. What a weird fucking episode that was last week,

We started doing it outside of a carousel. Then we did the next one, ice rink. And I just remember sitting down and being like, I don't know if this is a good, and instantly it became a bad idea. We didn't even get all our computer stuff out yet, and it instantly became a bad idea. It was almost like an episode of Master of Nunn,

where, you know, he tries to do a podcast somewhere in the city and that just becomes a misadventure throughout the city. Don't know that show, but. The Asi's an sorry show that, I mean, people are used to watch it. But now he's very problematic. Yeah. My problem is that I don't have to be a lot of, Netflix.

You know what? I'm gonna. Do you want to share? You know what? Do you want to steal? Oh, wait. I mean, I can't say that. Do you want to get Netflix?

Do you want me to help you pick it out? Like, I did the free trial and they've been emailing me again lately. Like, do another free trial. And everyone keeps saying Ozark is good. Do you feel, is that like the pop culture thing you feel most left out of the not being the Netflix guy? No, because I feel like most shows people watch, eventually they're just like, eh, this isn't that good.

There's a few good things on there, from what I understand. There's too much on Netflix that, especially like the superhero. American Vandal. I want to see that. Yeah, American Vandal. It's great. Like, there's enough there where I would feel left out if I didn't have it. But, like, when I see the adorable Mrs. Maisel or whatever the fuck that show.

Marvelous? Sure, whatever. I know that. I mean, like, when I see that, that M-E's, I don't need to say. I don't care. I don't need to see it. I'm sure it's great. But, like, that's, where is it?

Like, Hulu? Amazon? Where is that thing? Amazon, I think. Oh, that's on Netflix? Hold on. I assume everything is Netflix. Handmade's tale, I think.

on one, and there's nasals on the other one. No, that's not on Netflix either. Handmaids'Ns tell? That's on like Hulu or something, I think. That was Netflix for sure. The point being is that there's enough on Netflix that makes you feel like I need to get it. There's not enough on the other ones to make me feel like I need to get it. That's going to be the next thing is like bundling your online streaming thing into one thing where you get Amazon, Hulu, Netflix. That's when I'll get on board.

I'll definitely do that. Definitely do that then. I used to love when my dad would get like renew HBO and we get Cinemax for a while. Yeah. Oh, boy, it was great. Yeah. Oh, manual in space. Uh-huh.

Have you like, does he even know that we have the Cinemax Chias? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. They don't. They have to keep going up. Manual and space. Remember Emmanuel in space? Oh, manual and space.

Emmanuel. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, part of that series of film series that eventually went to space, Jason in space, Lepercon in space, Emmanuel in space. Oh, Lepercon went to space. Muppets in space.

Again, we've talked about this. Eventually, the Fast and Furious are going to go to space. They're going to, like, drive around on the moon or something, and it's going to be awesome. And we're all getting this rocket right now, that we're not a family. They're going to actually go to space and find, like, the space alien versions of themselves, and there's going to be some other alien who's going to be, like, we're a family. It wouldn't involve the aliens, so you're right. It would be, like, Kurt Russell being like, I need you and your crew to go to the moon,

because there are drug runners on the moon with moon drugs, you know. And it's going to be the dumbest plot ever, and you're still going to sit through the entire two hours and enjoy it. Right. Because that's what those movies are. Popcorn movies. Right. And why should I do that?

And Kurt Russell's like, well, what's his name in these movies? Kurt Russell. No, Vin Diesel's character. Oh, Johnny. It's like Victorino or something. Shane Victorino, former Phillies outfielders? Oh, Toreto. Vinny? Dominic Toreto.

Dominic. There it is. There you go. We got there. Pop culture reference. Well, Dominic, I just heard. Oh, they call it Dom. Dom, I just got a video from those moon drug runners, and they've got your favorite undershirt. Yeah, oh my God. They've got your lucky undershirt. You got to go get my shirt back. It's my favorite shirt for my family. And then like, what's his name?

the bald guy from Snatch. Right. Like, he goes up there. They're all in like, oh, you mean Jason Statham? Yeah. I was want to call him Michael Ironson. I ain't going to the moon for nothing.

You got to go to the moon. If you don't go to the moon, and we're not a family. I ain't even in your family. I'm not bloody going into spice. And then like he does, then like at the end he comes and saves the day and like a big astronaut.

So he's like, oh, this, what is the zero G's? I need more G's, mate. Charlie's there on and is vamping on a moon base. she's given nothing to do in the movie she just vamps just like in the last one I barely remember her I didn't really sit through the whole last one

she was in the last one because she was in Macs basically and like she was such an awesome like driving shit person and mad Max are like we'll put her in this driving shit movie that's I think how it was but like I feel like she just like sits at a desk and says get me like she makes Dom do stuff yeah he was bad in the movie he was given that red kryptonite like Chris and Superman 3 became bad bad dumb

but like what is what is she she have his, I don't think I know. He had his kid, spoiler. She had his kid and his baby mama, like, captured. And he had to do her evil bidding because of it. It was a good twist. Great plot. You know, how do you get Dom Toretta to do your bidding?

You take his family. But, like, everyone in the movie is confused as to why he's a bad guy. Don't you think they would have noticed, like, the baby wasn't around or whatever? Like, maybe that's the... Yeah, why wasn't Michelle Rodriguez like, Yeah. Yo, Dom, blink twice if they got your kid hostage. Classic Fast and the Furious dialogue.

Oh, it's the best. Oh, wait, so who are the contenders that people don't like? Okay. David L. Pumpkins says, by the way, change your name to Black Jeopardy, my friend, because I can't stress enough that everybody who remembers David S. Pumpkins from that episode, Black Jeopardy was the best schedule. Vegas, because in a league with this much parody, the odds of this. falling short are real good.

Disagree. Of the playoffs? Yeah, I'm kind of more sold, obviously, than I would. It's an A. Schmidt thing that worries me. They get through the first 20 games at like 10 and 10, they're fine. Hunter Lehman. The Leafs. If anything starts wavering, the Toronto media will drive people out of town.

My money is on Freddie Anderson. Hmm. Yeah. Yeah. See that. Freddie Anderson, having a bad year, sure. No, I feel like the... The honeymoon was about to be over, and then the...

they signed Tavares, now the Toronto Media is all like, they climb back in bed with the Leafs. If the Leafs losing the first round this year, that's when shit'll get that. Where is the needle on the media, Toronto Media, Prickometer? Because here's the thing. Tavares, I think, puts the needle back at like a four. But choosing Kyle Dubas over Mark Hunter, who was their best source, probably got them pretty pissed.

Yeah, that's true. But, like, I feel like they really haven't been too pissy this on. I haven't seen too much. Kyle Dubas bashing. Tavares, that's why. You landed the big fish. So like a Tavares... They're getting a little bit

on edge about this kneelander stuff. Like I saw Damien Cox tweeting this morning about like, a real gym with a side kneelander already. I'm eating raw meat. Yeah, because... I just can't.

James Palmer writes San Jose because they have one year. Wait, is that the Orioles pitcher? Or the guy from NCIS. You're talking about Jim Palmer. And Palmer, yeah, James, Jimmy. If Jones disappoints, they sustain a major injury or they run into a hot goalie in the second round. Like, that's that.

Wait, how are they going to run into a hot goalie? Lunkwis plays in the East. Damn. Boom. Boom! Brandon Kelly, caps, of course. How will they ever go on without the face of the franchise, Tom Wilson for 20 games? They'll go from Cup champs to relocated to Houston.

Sargasm. Yeah, you tweeted that very same thing last night, I believe. I only got one, like, response where they were like, um, Tuka-ask. First of all, I'm not even watching the game. I just wanted to do a bit. Benjamin Woodfinden. Woodfinden. It's German?

Or it could be Woodfinding. So it would be like, you know, named for the occupation that you have. He's a guy who finds wood. Yeah, yeah, yeah, blacksmith. Yeah, Hancock. Doorsmith. Yeah. The Jets, because the Wi-Fi and Winnipeg is so bad that Shevled Day Off

won't be able to download the latest NHL-19 rosters to see who he should trade for at the deadline. Wait, is Blacksmith? Anyone's last name? That's not really a good example. Porter. Kobe. Bookman. That's easy. Pittsburgh. Pittsburgh. Their main off-season acquisitions were Jack Johnson and salary cap's face. What could possibly go wrong?

Yeah, like I really feel like maybe last year was like the beginning of a turning where like Pittsburgh and teams are going to start fading. Turn to the tide. No one's got Tampa in there, huh? Matt Riegler, our friend, writes in, The Predators. Reney falls apart. Saros can't do a full season, and they have no more assets to tool with. I could see that. Prickett Renee falls apart.

Yeah? Yeah. You can see about any team, though, I guess. Their goalie stinks. They stink. Big dummy writes in, all 23 flyers are implicated in a finished cocaine ring bust. Yeah, I like how that news came out about Latara, and then, like, that was it. Nothing else has happened.

Well, the NFL is investigating, as you know. Yeah, they got to look into that. Thorpe Breaks in Tampa Bay. Okay. Because why haven't they won already with that roster? There you go. I mean, they might not win. No one ever said that about the whole capitals, right?

Yeah. Yeah. Jake Peterson. Jake Peterson. Chicago PD. Jake Peterson. Part of my French. Sorry.

Winnipeg. If Helibuck doesn't maintain his level of play, and if the D takes one big injury, you don't want that to happen to your D. No, you don't want your D taking any injuries. You don't want an injury to your D. No. It's like bends their up.

They're done, she says, if they... Yeah. I mean, like, again, you can say that about any team. If their goalie stinks, they stink. That was Benipeg's problem forever. Vinipig. Hello. I don't want to go to Vinipak.

There are no parks. There is no Wi-Fi. They are probably the team who's most on edge of disaster for making the playoffs. No Wi-Fi. No, Vinipeg for me. Thank you. much.

All right. That's a puck soup for this week. I'm at Comic-Con. If you listen to this tomorrow Friday, does we tape on Thursday night. I'm at Comic-Con on Saturday. I'll be there with the kid on Sunday. I think there was like four people that said hi today

when I was there today at New York Comic-Con. So hi back. It was good to talk to you. Because they knew you or they just said hi. No, because they knew me. Hi. Oh, hi. Oh, hello.

Okay, see you. Hi, hi. I had a couple guys stopped me as I was walking by, and it was nice. It was cool. I like when people say hey. Oh, so you just go there for the ego. I had one guy, our friend Mike, ask whether you would enjoy Comic Con. And I said, he believed you wouldn't.

And I said that there's a chance you might enjoy the... I don't really know what it is. It's a giant... Like, you show me your photos, and it's like, hey, there's like a sci-fi thing and a side-in-a-and-it. And it's like a Mori-povage booth. I don't understand what it goes on. There's a whole section of comic book artists and writers where you go and they can draw you shit and get your shit signed. There's all these merchandise booths that you buy t-shirts and figures and all kinds of geek shit.

And then there's like panels and presentations. Like Zach Levy was there talking about Shazam today. Or like Robert Kirkman's there to talk about the Walking Day. The Shack movie? No, that's Kazam. Oh, wait, what the hell is Shazam? So I think, but also the Alpsisam is like the superhero or little boy says Shazam. and he becomes a superhero.

It's like big, but superhero. I've never heard of that. All right. Maybe I wouldn't like it. But it's also people walking around dressed as shit. By the way, there should be a Kazam panel at this. I would go to that. It's like the 25-year anniversary of Goodfellas, only it's just Kazam.

What was it like to get in that suit every day? Like, just questions. I would go to that. I look my big pants. I think, but wouldn't you enjoy cosplay? Wouldn't enjoy seeing people? people dressed up as different characters. I saw a lot of Spider-Men today, a lot of Deadpools today.

Spider-Man. Spider-Man. It's not Joseph Spider-Man. He's a Spider-Man. You're friends. What's up? I think you'd enjoy it. But I don't think you'd ever want to go there.

You'd be miserable. I would check it out. At some point, I will eventually go. When is it run through? It's like two weeks, right? One week? No. It's a weekend.

It's a weekend? Yeah. But today's Thursday and you went. What's the weekend? It's a long, it's like Thanksgiving weekend. someday so it's over on Sunday yeah all right so maybe maybe next year I want I want I want I want the encroachment of Thanksgiving weekend into earlier in the week to continue like what Wednesday is is a half day and maybe in some places an off day oh we can we can make it happen oh I have

friends who've like worked the same place for a long time and like they don't even come in on Monday on Wednesday or the Monday oh yeah like they've just built up so much time there like so Thanksgiving weekend has become the de facto Super Bowl holiday we all want? If, like, you've got, like, 15 years of time put in. Like, I think most people, it's not that, but yeah. When are we going to have a president bold enough to be, like, Monday's a holiday after the Super Bowl? Like, it clearly is the thing that we, as a nation, get behind and all do together. It's if your team wins and you're super hungover and drunk. Otherwise, I can get the work the next day. After Patriots Falcons, like, I was upset, but I was able to go to

work the next day. But when the Giants won that first time, boy, it was that next day. The Monday after every Super Bowl is Tom Brady Day. a day where we all think about Tom Brady and not go to work. Oh, you're not doing Leighy. I'm not even doing a bit. I thought you were doing like a Sean Leahy football thing.

I swear to God, Sean. I thought you were just like, because maybe Sean's called out. The day after the Super Bowl was Jeff Hostetla Day. You joke. See, there's a difference. I would vote for that. All right.

That is the dumb show for this week. Thanks to nobody. We didn't have a guess. We were just here in the studio. A better studio. Yeah, being here in the studio, no dog barking. Yeah. It's good.

Less echo probably. There's, like, carpet on the walls that makes it less echoy. This is an actual, like, a radio studio. Who does the show here during the day? I have no idea. Everyone does their shows in that, the Jalen and Jacobi studio. That's where everyone kind of does everything. This one, I don't know.

But, I mean, I sit 40 feet away, and I still have no idea what goes on in this room. Honestly, we can be the first people to have been in here all year. That's quite possible. I have no idea. This is nice because it reminds me back when we used to do the show at Yahoo. Right. And now, like, I'm the Yahoo guy who gets you in the building as opposed to the way around. Right.

And then we would go, we had a little podcasting space. And then they're like, oh, we need this to store shit here, old chairs or something. Just keep pushing us around. And they pushed us into another place. And then we had to wait until people got done making Facebook videos to do the show. We were like Milton from office space. We refused to quit, but they just kept putting us in darker rooms. People were really impressed until we moved to that, that, that, that, that, that, that,

And then at the very end, we started doing the show. Yeah. We had our own, like, office where they set up the recording shit. That was kind of sweet. Which place? Remember in Yahoo? We had, we had, they set up the microphones in that little room. Oh, look at that little, yeah, yeah, yeah.

That room was, oh, that's where we did Brendan Burke in there, right? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We did Katie Olin in the voiceover closet. And then, like, pretty much every. Oh, no, we had. We did, we did, like, Overman and all them. In, like, the other room.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And then, yeah, it was good times. But, yeah, now. now it feels like that. It feels like we're in a proper place again. Yeah, it's nice.

All right. Thanks, everybody. We will talk to you next week. You can find me out with Sinski on Twitter. You can find all my work at ESPN.com, including all of our season preview stuff, which was really fun. And, yeah, where is your stuff? What? You made a fart noise with your elbow.

You can do it again. No, I can't do it again. My arm is stuck there. Wednesday's always always. late. Katie Nolan. We got a new episode this week. Bill Simmons was on.

We got a blast. We had a blast. We did some bits. He was here in town? He was right over there. Wow. Yeah. He did Jalen and Jacobi.

Wow. Yeah, it was fun. He was funny. He was good. They let me go on ESPN sometimes. Again. It just feels like Leahy. Trump?

Build the Wall, Space Force. Sure. Layie, build the wall. Space. Space Force. So it's like soft. Build the walls, Base Force,

Grantland. No, this reminds me of it, reminds me about friends when Chandler would just be Chandler. He just be like, could I be wearing, blah, blah, like,

I was like, Joey, but you know what I mean? Like, he would do his thing, but then, like, you'd have to have, like, serious episodes where, like, him and Monica would go adopt somebody,

he'd be like, I just, talk lower. He would just be himself, but he would just talk lower. I think we should have this kid. I'm still, I'm still hung up.

That's yours. I'm still hung up on, they go adopt somebody. Yeah, they just go, they like adopt somebody or whatever. Like a person or whatever, I don't know. 3-0 Bruins, and apparently the Sabres of Abboud off the ice tonight. Well, Brad Marchand. Good job.

Set in the tone. Marchand, three assists. That's, no, he's two, doesn't he? No, it's 3-0. Yeah, he has three assists. Oh, I think he had an assist in the first goal. But that's what he does. Captain Material.

That's what he does, Greg. Crab cakes and assault. Smoking and Duncan and assault and leading. Not Dunkin' Donuts, just Duncan. I get it. That was my favorite thing, by the way, during Capitol's opening night, was somebody who opined that the Bruins

since Duncan Donuts changed her name have given up seven goals and scored none. They have not scored a goal since it became Duncan. All right, now it's the end of the show. All right, goodbye. We're going to, oh, we have cool guests coming up. I'm recording a couple of interviews at Comic Con this weekend. so that'll be fun.

And more to come. Alex Pruitt's going to come on soon again. Good old Prue. Did he come on last year? He came on last year, right? Well, I'm on again. And then, because he's here, and he's smart. And then a number of other people will come on, too.

Well, I'll do the fart thing again. It did. I can't do it now. Every time. All right. We'll have you guys soon. Bye. Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slapshots and goons.

We've got, spoiled the commentary. To what if you commute But we also cover movies, TV shows, it's in tune It's your weekly bowl of Hagi and Nancet. Puckoo Today's episode of Puckoo Has been sponsored by Sonos Beam. Meet Sonos Beam, the smart, compact

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