Puck Soup - The Great Playoff Debate

Episode Date: March 19, 2020

The boys are back to talk about all the NHL season restart options on the table, life under quarantine, paying arena workers, Sean's travel nightmare, empty arena sports, video games we're playing and a contagious movie quiz. Sponsored by The Black Tux!

Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slap shots and goons. We've got sportly commentary to what if you commute. We also cover movies, TV shows, it's in tunes. It's your weekly bowl of hockey and nonsense. I'm Greg Wichinsky of ESPN, home of the Ocho, which is being resurrected this weekend so we can all watch Cherry Pit Spitting Competition. Ryan Lambert just this podcast

No big thing about it Sean McIndoo From the Athletic And you're in Puck Soup And dad of the year Let's not forget about that Hanging with the kiddies As you are

Yeah So yeah Welcome to the first Quarantine edition I don't even think That last week's counts That was more of just a reactive thing.

Nice timing on your part, Sean. Remember of the Illuminati, not being around for that, to be honest. Are you like one of those many CEOs that have quit their jobs in the last year, all part of a secret cabal that knew this was coming, according to members of my family that are now part of QAnon? Let's just say if I knew this was coming, I would not have picked last Wednesday to do international travel. So tell me about getting home, by the way.

In hindsight was not fun. I saw a tweet about that. You were in Florida? Was it? No, where were you? So, yeah, we were in South Carolina. We have my in-laws are down there. So we figured we would go down as our March break trip as a family, go down and see them do some fun family stuff.

And yeah, we left a few days early last Wednesday. And it was surreal because Wednesday morning we left. And this virus was a, I mean, it was a problem. It was a news story. There were some hockey games that might get played in empty arenas and that kind of thing. And we got up at the crack of dawn. We flew out. We had a nice lunch with the in-laws.

And by that night, it was as if the whole world had gone to hell. And we were sitting there going, like, what are we even doing down here? And at what point do we have to think about going back? Because we were scheduled to be down for a week. and within a few days, I mean, my wife and I are looking at each other going, we don't even know if we're going to be able to get back if we wait a week. So, wow. We made the decision to come back early.

Tried to come back on Saturday, ran into some problems at the airport, just typical flight got canceled. There was a maintenance problem and weren't able to get back to Ottawa, but decided to, you know, we asked the guy, can you get us to Toronto instead? And he said, yeah, and we figured that was close enough. And so, wow, did that and stayed in a hotel and figured the rest of it out the next day. And everyone got home safe and sound and everyone's good and healthy and all that stuff.

So all is well, that ends well. But it was just very surreal. You know, if you're Canadian, you travel to the States all the time. And it's just something you just take for granted. And then to suddenly be down there and be like, I don't know if my flight in two days, is even going to happen because of everything that's going on. It was a very strange situation, but like I say, we're, we made it and we're good. But obviously, like, it's okay because if you had to stay down here,

we obviously have our shit in order pretty well when it comes to this virus. I mean, we've been talking about how important it is to get ahead of this thing for months. So, I mean, no, if you want to be anywhere, it's in the good old US of A. Yeah. I'll say that for sure. You guys are doing fantastic, and we were brokenhearted to leave. But, yeah. How were airports at that point?

On the Saturday, they were, I mean, it was an airport, really. I don't know if it felt that different. It probably wasn't because I think by sad, like, we flew through Charlotte, which is a decent-sized airport. Yes. And I think. Initials clit, I believe, right? Charlotte Airport? That is the one.

Thank you. Yeah, I had some trouble finding it at first, but it was eventually we did. There it is. We did. We circled around, but got there eventually. And it was, it was, my guess is probably like half the people who were supposed to travel had already canceled their plans. And half the people who were traveling later had moved them up.

And so, you know, I'll say this. It was like we flew out on American, the, our flight out of Myrtle Beach didn't even get off the ground. But the guys who were there were working hard. They were, you know, they were doing their best. And when we got, we actually got into Charlotte because the guy told us there was a 10 o'clock flight to Toronto. It was 10 o'clock at night at this point. And at 915, when I was at the gate to check in, she looks at my ticket and goes,

you're not on this flight. You were supposed to be on an 8 o'clock flight. I'm sitting there going like you got like you got to be kidding me please tell me there's four of us please tell me there's four seats on this plane and she looks it up and looks at me and goes there's three seats left on the last plane to Toronto and I'm just like I literally like started to laugh because it was just like are you kidding but then it turned out there was something something else had freed up and it was okay but then they had to go on they had to call the main office for tech support because it wasn't letting them book us or something.

The point is, we got home and everybody did their thing and nobody was panicking. I mean, there were people walking around wearing masks and all that stuff, but it was, you know, people, people kept their stuff together and, yeah, we thanked them for it. You would have stayed at home. You would have stayed in the States, right? You would have taken the sacrifice and been like, leave me behind, you guys go if there's only three seats? I don't know what we would have done.

The plan B, well, I think we were already on plan B or C by then, but at some point we were going to just get a car somewhere and just do the drive. But the drive is, it's two days. So, you know, what's the border going to be in two days? It was a really unpleasant situation. But I say that being fully aware that there's lots of people having much more unpleasant weeks than we had. As I've said a few times, all as well, that ends well. Speaking of masks, you could tell how aimless and empty and defeated many hockey fans are feeling right now. Because P.K. Suban put on Instagram a photo of him and Lindsay Vaughn both wearing surgical masks going out shopping.

And no one had a problem with it. So the single most divisive player in the NHL was doing the thing everyone says you don't need to do if you are not sick. And actually is a wasteful thing to do because literal hospitals can't get masks right now. And actually, no one said anything about it. I was fucking stunned. Here's the thing, Greg. If he's wearing a mask, that means we can't see him smile. So that's right.

That's really what we've wanted from him all along. There is, I mean, I think that as we, and we'll both me and you, Ryan, we'll talk about our deals in a second. I think as we go forward, there is going to be a lot more angst about the, um, sort of class separation between athletes and people like us. You already saw it with some of the testing that's being done and how did you guys get the tests and things of that nature. My wife was telling me a story also about like an Instagram influencer who had a rich doctor friend that administered a coronavirus test in the back of his car on her, which sounds dirty. but I think it was actually on the up and up. And the thing with the nets and the whole thing,

I think that's going to be a major, major ball already rolling down the hill and who gets tested and when and why are athletes getting tested if they're self-isolating like the rest of us are. So I don't know. It was interesting. Ryan, what's up with you, buddy? Hanging out, man. You know, I took my dog to the beach yesterday.

There's a beach near our house that, it's not often full of people or anything like that. And, yeah, just walk around there and hung out for like an hour, hour and a half. But otherwise, yeah, I'm just playing a lot of video games, I guess. What are the, I forgot to ask both of you guys, what are the, like, restrictions in place right now where you are? I mean, like, you mentioned traveling to the beach. That's probably a thing. I know in some places there are curfews and things of that nature.

First off, Sean, what is it like right now? where you are. We don't have any formal curfews or anything like that. We've got, everybody has been asked to stay home. They are in the process of closing all the non-essential stuff. Schools are closed here in Ontario. They'd already announced that. In our case, because we've returned from the United States, we've been asked to do the full self-isolation thing for 14 days. So we have not. even really been out of the house other than to walk down the street and check the mail. But that's that that's something that is everyone is being asked to do.

They have not made it mandatory yet. But at least my general impression is that for the most part people are doing it. Like it's it's kind of a ghost town up here. And for for all the good and bad that implies. But yeah, it's there's there's a lot that's been put in place. but so far most of it is still an ask and not an order. And Ryan, are most of the Duncan still 24 hours? Yeah, you know what?

I haven't been, when did I? Either one on Saturday or Sunday morning just to a drive-through one. And yeah, there was nobody there. It was wild. Usually there's like 10, 15 cars in line. I think I waited for two minutes, not even. It was, that was. that was a really like, oh boy, it's real bad out here.

Kind of a feeling where it's like, fuck, nobody's even in line for their fucking ice coffee with the, with the insulated cup for the quote unquote sleeve that people love around here. They were probably all lined up at Trader Joe's already that morning. Like that's the craziest thing that's happened here, I think, is the supermarket bit where like both, and again, this speaks to the fucking Bay Area. area more than anything else. Both Trader Joe's and Whole Foods had like lines outside the door and like line control things that you see when people are lined up to like buy movie tickets on the first day or whatever. Like it was it was pretty surreal to see that and like I think Tj's is

doing this sort of like we're only letting certain amount of people in the in the place to keep the the social distancing thing going on and what have you. But I feel like I feel like we were probably about a week and a half ahead of everybody else insofar as the panic setting in. Because the toilet paper started getting sold out about two and a half weeks ago. And like it's, it's been, it's been surreal to see everybody else sort of being impacted by it now. And then it's also really surreal to see places that simply don't give a fuck like Florida, apparently, which again, you'd figure you'd give a fuck if you have all the old people in the country living in your state. But that's just my opinion.

For here, like, Ruby, this was kind of crazy. So Ruby and I had been working at home, you know, for the last couple weeks and reconfigured the apartment so she has her place to work. And then, you know, I got my spot to work. So that'll be good and healthy. I think if we were still living in our rail car apartment in Manhattan, we might be at each other's throats already. because it's a little bit more compact than the place that we have now. She had to go back to Apple to pick up some stuff, like a monitor and stuff,

so she can kind of create her own workstation here. And they had a thing, and this was crazy. They had a, like, have you seen the tents that they're setting up to do the drive-through coronavirus testing? Sure. So they had that, but they didn't have the tests. But what they did was you couldn't go in the building. and retrieve your personal effects before someone took your temperature to make sure you weren't running a fever. So you drive up to the thing, they zap your forehead with an instant, you know,

thermometer, and then you're then allowed to go in the building and get your shit. I was like, wow, this is, I mean, A, pretty smart, B, like, fucking right out of a fucking movie. So that was her deal. And then around here, it's like everybody else. It's like Ghost Town. We have, shelter-in-place restrictions, so we're not really supposed to go anywhere that you don't need to. I think people for the most part are keeping to that outside of the supermarkets, which I guess are essential in and in and out, which is always going to have a drive-through line, no matter when it is. And just, I mean, you know, the work goes on. I think from like a work perspective, oh, by the way, the thing about flying, I'm supposed to go see family at the end of the month. It's kind of a bummer that I can't go.

But I still have the tickets. I'm not sure what to do yet. I think I'm going to have to figure it, like, call United at some point to cancel them, but I don't want to do it until it's like a few days before I have to go, just because I'm sure they're being inundated with that kind of shit. We were supposed to go. We were going to go to Paris in April, and the airline already was like, that's not happening.

Your flight's not going to take place. So, yeah. Now we're not going to Paris. I had to explain to my mom last night when I talked to her that, like, she's like, you're still coming out, right? And I'm like, no. Like, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, what, it's, it's not going to be a flight. I can't leave the house.

It's only like essential travel. And, you know, it's not going to happen. So. God, God, God, God bless her her sweet little soul for thinking that I was still going to be the only one on a plane. Now, granted, the Wi-Fi would have been terrific. My God. I could probably stream anything on that plane if, if I'm in there alone. But still can't go out there.

So it's pretty, it's pretty barren. And so, you know, the town I live in right now has this little beautiful little downtown area. And it's, that's been like my entry point to really sort of understanding what's probably happening all across the country, which is that, you know, the bar is closed. The restaurant bars are closing at like eight because of the curfew stuff. And you can do take out, but you can't sit down. And like all of the little shops, the clothing shops and the knick-knack stores and everything. thing. They basically have closed, in some cases, indefinitely, and in other cases for a few weeks just to see how things play out. And I'm just like, fuck, you know, if this is happening here, I mean, this is probably the same situation at every, you know, suburb in the country right now. So it sucks. I know it's Pollyanna to believe this. And I know in some cases, businesses have said this is what they're doing, one of those businesses being the hockey news. I just, I just, I I just do hope that, like, people that do get laid off or furlough can get their jobs back, like, when this eventually passes.

But I don't know if that's going to. A trusting business to do the right thing is not necessarily in our best interests, I think. But, you know, the hockey news guy did an interview with The Athletic with Sean, Fitzgerald from the Athletic last night, saying that it's in his intention to rehire Ken Campbell and Ryan Kennedy and Matt Larkin and Sam McKayg and others that are friends. when this thing blows over. But I think the other thing about that, too, that he didn't really address is how many people that subscribe to the hockey news are now not going to subscribe to the hockey news because they decide to, like, lay off their staff within days of the NHL's announcement? It's a tough look. Yeah. And then then if you do that, do you end up just hurting the writers that might get their jobs back by, you know, hurting the bottom line of the publication?

It's a tough nut to crack. The thing with all of the sports media stuff is, like sports media, the sports will come back at some point. We don't know when, but it will come back. And there was, you know, as an industry, sports was doing fine. This isn't, you know, this isn't something where these were poorly run businesses or, you know, had some sort of flawed business plan. This is kind of an out of nowhere lightning bolt. and in theory, someday when sports comes back and then everything goes back to normal,

that should go back to normal too. It's just a question of how you get there and how you bridge that gap. And especially any publications or sites or companies that were already maybe struggling a bit, it's tough. I don't know. It's hard to find a ton of optimism in a, in a lot of things these days. Right. And I think, and we'll get into this when we talk more about like the playoff format shit that people are bandying about.

I mean, the great unknown is how society snaps back when this does pass. And I got into a conversation the other day. I think it was with Jason and Mike on Vancouver Radio about like recessions versus this pandemic. And like recessions are are difficult because you don't know how they'll snap back. You don't know why they'll snap back. You don't know when they'll snap back. We at least get a sense that this stuff will pass based on what's happening in China and South Korea and other places. But then when it does, what does life look like?

And I just, you know, I hear all this talk about like, oh, we'll just open the arenas again and the people will come and watch the playoff games and shit. I'm like, if you're somebody who's been laid off for three months and you don't get your job back, like what fucking priority are you giving to NHL playoff tickets? You know, it's, it's, I think it's, um, it's really sort of naive to believe that any sense of true normalcy is going to return within a few months of this thing ending. I don't know. I do know that I probably should have been more thrifty in my spending at supermarkets before this thing hit because I definitely played into the pandemic mindset when you're in the place and you're running around and there's no bread.

And there's no pasta and there's no toilet paper and there's no hand sanitizer. I think I bought some things that I'm like, it's like, it's that moment where you hold a can of artichoke hearts in your hand. And you're just like, you know what? We might be quarantined. We might need artichoke hearts. And you throw it in your fucking basket. And there's a lot of that sort of purchasing that I think I did in these goddamn supermarkets because you're flipping out. And Trader Joe's, it's probably the worst of that.

Just because you go in that frozen food section, you're like, what if I need Kalamari rings? And you throw it your bag and then you're on your fucking. way. So nobody, don't, don't binge by, I think is my advice to you if you are going to a panicky supermarket. Since we last did the show, the NHL, well, Ryan, I talked about the NHL doing its pause, but since we lasted the show, a bunch of minor leagues all canceled their seasons, like got super aggressive, no longer pausing, canceling their seasons. On my other podcast, you talked to the commissioners of the Southern Professional Hockey League and the ECHL about their deals.

And I was really surprised how candid they were about saying, look, like, we don't know through all this uncertainty whether even the teams that we had playing this year are going to all come back and play next year, which is really kind of a frightening prospect. But, man, I give kudos to anybody who stepped up and canceled their season because I think, I think, you know, if you're a league and you know what your finances are, just fucking pull the plug. Like, don't dick around with it. Yeah, I don't think they were like, you know what?

Like, they weren't in a position to do anything but what they did, right? Like, they're not billion-dollar industries, so they're just going to be like, well, we don't have the money to pretend. Like, I kind of think the NHL is maybe doing a little bit where we'll talk about it later, but like the idea of, well, we're going to have a 48 team playoff that goes in September and October, and then we're going to play 82 games. next season is Yeah, okay, I fucking bet you are. Like, they don't have the finances to live in fucking fantasy land like that, so they get to go.

Well, that's it, bye. Everybody, have fun. So it's the NHL, part of the AHL, a resurrected California Golden Seals team. I'm trying to figure out how we get to 48 teams. They'll figure it out. Look, they're going to get these gate revenues back, man. They're not going to.

Everybody's invited. Yeah, fuck it. Half the K-HL, who cares? I love it. I love it. Open Challenge Cup. That's the way I'm sure. Yeah, let's go. Yeah, Sean, was there ever an open challenge Stanley Cup back in the day? Or was it just always like a league format type thing? Back in the days of the NHL, no. But like in the early Stanley Cup days, yeah, you just showed up and we're like, we want to play you for the Stanley Cup. And we've got like seven guys and six pairs of skates. And all right, that was it. You just played for the Stanley Cup until. you know, one of the goalies fell through the ice and then that was that was it, Stanley Cup champion. We could go back to that. That's tremendous.

Do you guys remember when the, in the 2005 lockout, when it was, when the season was canceled and there was like this, these dudes in Canada tried to challenge for the cup and they made the art, there was some sort of legal or. There's like a bylaw. Yeah. Towards the cup. Yeah. That they wanted like the Canadian government to force. the NHL and yeah, didn't work out. And that scrappy bunch was the Carolina Hurricanes in 2006.

I loved that idea, by the way. I thought that was one of my favorite things in the lockout was trying to like work the system. And I wanted that scene from like the sports movie where like Gary Betman's saying, you know, this can't possibly happen. And then like the NHL lawyer who's not Gary Betman and comes up to him and says, actually, sir, Bylaw, 14.35 says they do have a legal right. And then we go from there. Yep.

We should just write the script during our downtime. There's no rule that a dog can't challenge for the Stanley Cup. Exactly. Yeah, I do love, open challenge Stanley Cup. Now I'm going to be thinking about that. Beer League teams all forming together trying to take on the, you know, the Colorado Avalanche for the Cup. The KHL.

I mean, like, you know, some. random 40-something-year-old dude isn't going to beat an NHL team. That would never happen. You can't. That would never happen. Can't happen at all. Do you realize that the Zamboni game was like three and a half weeks ago? Doesn't it feel like 30 years? Yeah, I don't remember any. Like, it's just the, I saw like a tweet by the guy's wife show up on my timeline and I was like, oh yeah, right. I remember you guys. Jesus. Do oral histories get moved up during quite? quarantine? Like, if it's a month from the David Ayers games, does the oral history become valid? I would read like an oral history of this morning at this point. I would

reminisce nostalgically about better times. Oh, God, by the way, speaking of better times, and if you're listening to this podcast, you do probably have a certain affinity for dark comedy and gallows humor. Norm McDonald did 10 minutes on the coronavirus. It was very funny. I haven't seen that yet. I'm saving that in my back pocket for when I needed. I think the line that will stick with me is, hey, remember, remember when you didn't know

how you were going to die? You know, like last week? So goddamn good. And you could tell, he could tell he was like, like, Ryan, you can tell he was free, he was freestyle in it too. Yeah, of course he was. Yeah, it was just fantastic. It's, it's him in a track suit with a Red Bull on stage.

fucking freestyling coronavirus material. And Norm MacDonald, no less, doing it. So, you know, it's good. The KHL tried to press on until a team's from Kazakhstan and Finland said, hey, we're not going to do this anymore. We're just going to leave, leading to the coach of Dinama, Moscow, saying, they should be drummed out of the league. You know what the problem with foreigners is?

Is that they're foreigners? So that's always a good time. And what accent was that supposed to be? That was definitely Russian. Well, okay. Yep. That's it. Yeah, okay.

You know, listen, they're not all great. And by the way, it's, it's, it's his own part of Russia that you're probably not familiar with. Impression Stan, I believe it's called. So the KHL stopped. Everybody else in Europe stopped. Most North American League stopped. Yet yesterday during the day, Belarus was playing its playoff games and streaming them on YouTube to the light of hundreds of hockey fans who randomly found it on Twitter. I couldn't fucking believe it.

And it was like a full arena, too. It was so bizarre. But Belarus plays on while the rest of the world is canceled. So while all this shit's been going on, the first few days of it were spent figuring out. which teams and their owners were gigantic assholes and which ones were going to pay their arena workers for misdates. And to the credit of hockey fans, a lot of the gigantic assholes, not all of them, but a lot of them were then shamed into paying their players.

Now, the tricky part about this, boys, is that there are some teams that flat out said, yeah, we're just going to give everybody their salary. And then there are some other teams that were like, yeah, we're going to establish a fund. Yeah. And then there are other teams that are just like, yeah, we're going to help them out. And then the Bruins are like, fuck, fuck no. I mean, what the fuck? I mean, we only made all our money in concessions.

So I feel like the work isn't quite done for the fans that felt passionate about this. Yeah, that's right. I mean, it's a situation where, yeah, like, you know, everybody's like, oh, even Eugene. Melnick is stepping up to the plate and isn't that and but Eugene Melnick stepping up to the plate was we'll talk to everybody individually and see what their individual needs are and I'll cut them a check for

$38. Which they're all going to end up paying Eugene probably like yeah that's right. We had a good conversation and it's going to be a real high vague interest loan here you know like just fucking yeah and

you know Buffalo I don't know if it's changed, but obviously, like, the big criticism with Buffalo was, we'll, yeah, we'll, we'll pay everybody if the games get canceled. But right now they're just postponed, so fuck you, I guess. Yeah, that was, what a bizarre. And, like, they put that out there almost like a point of pride. Like, look what we're trying to do for people. When they eventually cancel games in several months, like, we'll take care of these people.

Like, what the fuck, man? somebody from the Buffalo media asked me over DM whether the Pagoolas were worried if they would have to pay people twice if they pay people now and then they have to pay them again if they're actually our games. I'm like, I don't give a shit.

People need money now. Work out the details later. Who cares? Yeah. What was that thing Terry Pagula said when he bought the Sabres? Like if I'm looking to make money, I'll go dig another natural gas well. I'll go frack off a little bit more. Yeah. Like, but now all of a sudden he has to turn out his pockets. Like, oh, I couldn't

possibly pay these people. Look, I'm only a billionaire a few times over. What am I supposed to do? Well, that's a real... No, but it's a good point by him. I mean, like, listen, he's obviously deserving of some sort of bailout. I mean, it's not like you know, he's the casino

industry asking for a... Oh, right, the casino New Industry is asking for a bailout. That's right. He should just think of it as, I don't know, a third of one year of Villalaino's deal. Just, look, if you're going to give that kind of money out, you don't get to also be like, well, look, I don't know. And when the government denies his petition, he's like, why? And they're like, because you should have known he's not a center. He just, he never played center. He was a wing that you tried to make center.

He was like, all right, it's fair enough. Christian Airhoff deal wasn't any better, by the way. Well, no, I mean, that's the problem. If the NHL gave them relief for that buyout money, maybe that could help some people out, but where are you going to do? I'm sure they're still paying for that, right? Sure. The Airhoff?

The Airhoff went at the very least, probably. So, yeah, I mean, like, you're, look, Jeremy Jacobs, everybody knows what the deal of Jeremy Jacobs is, but like, has there been any kind of uptick in, in, uh, anger and ire about the Bruins and the situation in your neck of the woods, Ryan, or is this sort of just like there's so much of shit going on that no one cares? Yeah, I think everybody's like, that's really fucked up. Um, I, are the state attorney general had a tweet about it either last night or this morning saying like, oh, wow.

We hope, uh, Mr. Jacobs steps up to the plate and does what's right, you know, that kind of thing. but, like, you know, I don't think they can force anybody to do anything. So, by the way, that Earhoff buyout is going for another, like, five or six years minimum. I just looked it up. The fucking Bobby Benia contract of the NHL. Or the Rique D.Priot contract to Buffalo. Through 27, 28 is when the buyout money finally grinds to a stop for old Christian Airhoff.

857 grand a year for another eight years. Good for him. Incredible. incredible. And he got to fly in the private plane also to sign his contract. That's true. That's right. I just, like, what a fucking embarrassing look for the Bruins, like, where their players step up immediately? Like, and they stepped up immediately in the way that tells you, well, no, it tells you, it tells you that, like, they know that their owner's not going to do anything, right? So, like, they got to do it on their own. But didn't they just blast out a link to, like, a fucking go fund me? I don't know that. They did. But, like, that's fine. You're trying to help. You're doing what you can.

Everybody's doing what they can. Yeah. Paying the workers. Ottawa got its first, was the first team to get a positive test for coronavirus after. Well, we all saw that coming, didn't we? Yeah, I mean, gone, obviously, right. They got it in Uber. No, they got it somewhere in California, probably.

They played, they were one of the teams that played here in San Jose. after the local government recommended not playing games, and the sharks are like, but we need to make money these next three games. Then we'll get out of town and come back, and hopefully this will all have blown over. So the Kings and the Ducks are all saying, hey, you know, we took precautions, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Sharks really haven't really said anything. And one of their arena workers tested positive in recent days. So the senator is a male player in his 20s, it really narrows it down on the senators, tested positive for coronavirus. How was that played in the local media there, Sean? Well, I mean, as you'd expect, it's a big story, although, you know, the fact that it's the first certainly makes it newsworthy, but I think people understand that we're a week or two down the road. this is probably, it's probably going to seem quaint to think back to the time where there was one

NHL player that had tested positive. It's, you know, it'll be the first of many and that doesn't, you know, that doesn't mean that there'll be bad outcomes to that. They're, you know, these are young, healthy guys. You know, you, we've, we've seen in the NBA where there's, there's been quite a few more positive tests. And so far at least, doesn't sound like anyone's, having especially severe symptoms.

So that's good news. Hopefully it's the same in the NHL. But yeah, it's kind of like you knew this was coming. There was absolutely no way that we were going to go through what we're going to go through over the next few weeks and have the NHL escape unscathed. And yeah, you just, I mean,

you cross your fingers and hope for the best outcomes for everybody involved. and that's all you can do. Yeah, and I agree with you on the fact that there's going to be a lot more positive test. And I got to give Betman credit. Like, his eye was on the prize on all this thing, which is that we can dick around with the idea of empty arena games and all this other stuff. But like the minute there's a positive test in one of these sports, then that's it. That's the whole ball game.

Then you've got to get, you just got to shut down. I think the NBA understood that and then the NHL understood that. And then the NHL understood once the NBA goes, there's no way. I mean, that's, that's it. And you know what? And not to get ahead, because I know we're probably going to talk about what it could look like when we resume. But that's something we got to prepare for.

Like, the NHL could come back and have everything all set to go. And then you get another positive test or two. And what do you do then? Like, does everything just shut back down? And at that point, you'd probably be done. Yeah, it's, uh, Yeah, it's, it's tough. And, and I mean, you just, I guess what you hope out of all of this is, first, obviously,

you hope that the player that's tested positive now, you hope he turns out to be okay. And everybody around him and everyone around him, yeah, exactly. And then the other thing is you hope that if at some point they do piece together where this came from and how it happened, that it's not something that you look back on and very obviously say he should never. ever been in that position. He shouldn't have been in that building. He should not have been at that game. That game shouldn't have been held. And as a result of that, this happened. I mean, that would be an ugly situation all around. So I'm going to see. Yeah. And I think that that speaks more to the thing that happened in the last two weeks in a lot of places, Ohio being one of them,

where it was sort of like, we recommend you don't do this. Well, you could recommend a lot of things to a lot of people, but they're still going to do it, right? Like, you've got to tell them you fucking can't. Like, at some point, Santa Clara County just said, no, fuck, just shut the fucking arena down. And then that took care of the arena problem. And so I think maybe the lesson to be learned in a lot of these cases is, is you got to be emphatic about it. Like, you got to say, hey, we gave you a weekend and look what happened. Everybody went to goddamn bars. So we're going to shut the bars down now. Sorry. Like, that's the thing you got to do. Yeah. And you have to. Because if, if I own a bar and you own a bar and I want to close, but you're going to stay open.

And all my customers are going to go to you. And now my business goes, like, it's, yeah, you just have to say, no, everyone, we're shutting everyone down. And that's, that's the end of it. Yeah. And like, you know, for that brief day where Kid Rock's boot scooting roofy bar or whatever the fuck in Nashville was trying to be defiant about staying open. despite everybody saying that all the shit on Broadway should shut down. Like, it's, who needs that in society at this point? But yeah, the testing thing is going to happen.

And Ottawa was the first out of the gate. So you mentioned the players being healthy. How do we feel about here's how I'm staying fit videos from NHL players? We've seen some rollerblading. We've seen some workouts. and we are now seeing several in which they are soccer dribbling toilet paper rolls as part of the toilet paper challenge that people are doing. Do you like these videos?

Or do you not care to see them? I think, yeah, who cares? There was one in the – I can't remember who it was, but it was an NBA player was just doing like laps in their hallway. And another NBA player commented and said, you're going to need to do about 10,000 of those for that to make a difference. going like 15 feet, who cares? And it's like, yeah, I mean, look, as long as the NHL doesn't have all its players singing,

imagine, I think we're, I think we're in pretty good shape. Oh, God, that was a rough one, man. Have you seen that yet, Sean? I have not, no. You're all set. Don't investigate further. No, it's officially the new cats. You have to see it to understand it.

It's a bunch of celebrities, many of whom bravely, Ryan, are not working. wearing their makeup, singing the John Lennon, I was to say John Legend. John Lennon Classic Imagine. Now, the chances are pretty good that on some TV show in the last several years, John Legend has sung Imagine. I would imagine. You're right about that. Because if there's, if it's on TV and you have money, John Legend's going to be on your show.

No, it's Gail Godot, Wonder Woman herself, and a bunch of other celebrities. Natalie Portman, Cyclops, James Marsden, Udells, Jimmy Fallon, I think, was in it. He unfortunately was in it, yes. Yeah, and they all sing a different line from Imagine. So it's kind of like, we are the world, but terrible and also doesn't raise any money. So. That sounds awesome. There you go.

I'll check that out for sure. Please do. I mean, if Jimmy Fallon's in it, it's got to be golden. It's going to be great, yeah. It's fantastic. And he doesn't even play a little xylophone. He actually, I think, just sings the song. It's great.

But anyway, it's a weird time. And eventually it's not going to be a weird time. And on the day, on the day, ladies and gentlemen, that they say it's all good, it's all clear. And we can lift some of these restrictions. You don't have to be quarantined. You can get on with life. You're going to want to look your best. And you can look your best with our friends at the Black Tux.

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and whether I would have made the quarantine cut. If they could only have like 50 people at the wedding, would I have been? Because I'm usually seated at the table where you feel like maybe you were on the chopping block potentially like way in the fucking corner. Yeah. Like the friends table but not the good friends table. Not good friends table.

The co-workers table. Yeah. A co-workers table. You will not be introduced to my parents' table. Yeah, a hodgepodge or potpourri table. Hey, how do you know the groom? Oh, I got into a traffic accident with him once in exchange him for me. you know, that kind of table, I'm usually there.

So I feel like I would not have made the quarantine cut at, at least 30% of the weddings I've been to. All right. So what comes next for the NHL is the thing that people are talking about, despite the fact that we are probably three months away from coming back. Bill Daly has said that the NHL and the NHLPA can negotiate a artificial salary cap number. Right.

That might keep things sort of the way they are this year for next year. Right. Which they have to. I guess they have to do. They cannot raise the salary cap. They cannot. They can't raise it. But what they can't, because I've, and this is worth talking about just because I've,

I've heard from some readers who are confused on this point because we all know that next year's salary cap is based on this year's revenue. So we've lost 15% of the season. there's a very good chance we're going to lose the entire playoffs, which is a huge chunk of revenue. Like if the NHL's revenue for this year is 65% of what was projected, or 65% of what last year was, does that mean the salary cap goes down by a third? And in theory, based on the automatic formula, it would, but that doesn't benefit anybody. If you're going to play a full year next year, there's no reason that both sides wouldn't sit down and say that's that's not how we're going to work it going forward it

I mean it would just be complete I mean it would be Armageddon for roster management and for every team and that doesn't like nobody benefits from that the owners don't win the owners don't get to spend less they they still it's so yeah they're they're going to I would put aside concerns over salary cap they have they have the ability to figure out whether they actually can sit down and figure it out without it turning into a big drawn-out fight like everything else these two sides try to do is a different story. But yeah, the salary cap's not going to go down by 20 million next year. But it's also not going to go up to 88 million or whatever they were talking about just a few weeks ago.

No. Yeah, that was so funny. They were like, oh, it could be as high as 88 million. And then it was immediately like, except we're not going to play a third of the season. So maybe not so much. Asterisk. Contingions on revenue coming in. Yeah.

The numbers that I got from a player source where if they don't complete the rest of the regular season, that's about $100 million that they lose. If they don't play the playoffs, that's $250 million that they would lose. So you're talking about $5 billion down to maybe $4.6 as far as revenue. And again, like, we'll talk about this when we get to talking about the playoff format in a second. but like, of course the players want to come back and finish out everything. They're going to get, it's not simply just the escrow hit they're going to take next year for the 50-50 split that isn't happening this year. It is going to be a multiple season hit they'll take to make up the revenue if they don't come back and at least put a tourniquet on this thing. So the money on the table is a big driving force here.

But I agree, like, you don't, especially when you think about how condensed the off-season. will end up being if we do come back and play. Like the idea that you could dramatically lower the salary cap and then have all these teams having to make moves and trade players and cut guys when it's going to be a mad sprint to the beginning of next season. Which is another thing that's going to. Yeah. Yeah. It's crazy.

But you're right. The thing here is like, you know, when you look at it and say, okay, if there's no playoffs and I mean, those numbers you gave, those are actually lower than I would have thought. so maybe that's that's better news but it's it's not so much the salary cap it's going to be that escrow like because that will kick in that's not something that the league is just going to wave that actually is and that's why like when the story came out a few days ago about how NHL players were still going to get all their paychecks even if the season wasn't played

and people were like oh well this isn't this good news that that the players are still going to get paid and it's like well Hold on. Well, yes, and no. Because they're giving it all, like, they're going to give it all back. If there's no, if there's no red, they split 50, 50, the revenue. If there is no, and it's not true that there's no revenue because there's certain things that still do come in. So it's, I mean, it's not like every dollar disappears.

But there's going to be, like, you thought players didn't like escrow when it was 10 or 15%. It's, we're going to have probably, uh, or at least potentially the nightmare scenario where not only do you not get any of your escrow back, but now the league is going to come to the players and say, you've got to write us a check for even more, which... And that's why the theory right now amongst the players is that it's not going to just... I mean, it's not going to be like a 50% escrow hit next year or some shit. Like, it's going to be something that'll probably be installment payments for lack of a better term next year in the following couple of years

where they just increase it, you know, incrementally to make the money back. Because for those that don't know, like, the way it works is the players get their paid, right? They could just get their money. And then at the end of the season, the owners take a look at what the revenues actually were, and then they even it out 50-50, right? And so the players getting the last three paychecks, one for two, I think, for services rendered and then one for the games that they're missing. That's great.

But then the owners are going to see how much revenue didn't come in, and then they figure it out after the season. And it's going to be a hell of a thing. way it's calculated with with the revenue being divided by 31 teams and that becomes the midpoint and the mid most every team spends over the midpoint so even in a good year where the league nails its revenue forecast and there's no shortfalls the players still end up paying escrow let alone a league where in a year where suddenly they they fall well under that it's uh yeah they're they're going to get it's going to be it's going to be a big hit and that's yeah you guys are right

that's why the players are pushing aggressively to play as much as they can when they get back because every every every fan who goes into a building every fan who you know who can who buys a concession any fan who uh you know any dollar that gets spent on the nchel this summer that wouldn't normally have happened. 50 cents of that goes right to the players. So we've been hearing for years about the players and the owners being equal partners, and it always kind of rings hollow, but in this case, they actually kind of are. Yeah, for sure.

Well, we've mentioned it several times now. We might as well get at this player's plan that's happening. Frank Sarajevolli reported about it on TSN this week, a text chain amongst elite players coming up with a plan. to potentially return to the season. I do love the fact that it's a text chain of elite players, and one of the first things that they do is sacrifice the All-Star game next season to make sure that they get this season done.

And by the way, shout out to everyone who thought they were an elite player, but you're not on the group text, and you're just kind of like awkwardly like, oh, okay, like Ryan Getslaff is sitting there like, no, okay, no, I guess maybe it blocked. I don't know. I don't know. I'm not on it. If you ever needed further evidence that Philip Forsberg's not a star, just look at his text chain.

Exactly. So the deal that they're talking about, this is the unofficial proposal. Late July could be the return. Training camps open in early July. They would play a truncated conclusion to the regular season that would wrap up by the end of July. That would obviously be, you know, allow teams to even. even out their games. You got teams that played 72. You got games of teams that have played 68. And also give them some warm-ups for the playoffs. How would the playoffs work? Well, a two-month sprint

beginning in August, Stanley Cup awarded at the end of September. Sounds like seven-game series to me. A three-to-four-week transition period, whoof, we'll follow in October with the draft, free agency and training camps all happening in the span of a month. Hell yeah. And then the full 2020-2020 regular season, condensed 82-game schedule would start in November, and the Cup would be awarded again in late June 2021. Which apparently is the league's big priority, is that whatever we do, we get a full season next year. As it should be.

I don't think that any concept that would shave games off of a season, where you might be able to come back and play to crowds is a good concept at all. Well, unless we literally have to choose between 82 games next year or something less, and we get a Stanley Cup this year. Like, that's where it becomes, that's where it becomes tricky. You think so? Because, like, because, like, I just don't, I don't understand harming a season where. I think, ask an average NHL fan if they'd rather have the Stanley Cup,

awarded in a somewhat fair and decent playoffs this summer and then a 70 game season next year or skip the Stanley Cup and play 82 games next year. I think most fans are going to pick the cup. They don't, I mean, the regular season is already too long and boring as it is. I mean, even though it's, even though the season's already fucked up and even though it's going to be August when they do this? I think so. I don't know.

I feel like hockey fans are really open-minded. to weird shit right now when it comes to trying to complete the season and do the playoffs. I don't think that they need seven-game series. I don't think that they need a tradition. But it may not even be that. You know, when I say like a full and fair playoffs, I don't necessarily mean four rounds of seven games, because you're right. We might not be able to do that.

But I think honestly, if there's any scenario where you can pick whatever you think the most extreme version of the playoffs that still works is, And I think hockey fans will burn a dozen or two dozen games from next regular season to get that. And I don't think they'll have to think too hard about it. Just for me, it's like just make it as weird as possible. Like all 31 teams are in, first round, single elimination, second round. Just like, because, I mean, who cares? Like, look, people still legitimately say, like, you know, the 95 devils and the 2013 Blackhawks,

Like, oh, that has an asterisk on it, whatever. How dare you? Well, I'm just saying people say, I don't care one way or the other. It's all bullshit. It'd be the 2012 Kings, right, that I think would have the asterisk? No. Didn't they win in the short season? No, it was the Hawks?

Yeah, I just said that. And, but like, okay, you're going to go, okay, well, there's an asterisk for, they didn't play the full regular season. Then there's an asterisk for, you know, they, they, they, they, they, they, started the playoffs four months after the regular season ended, five months after the regular season ended. Then, you know, there were 24 teams in the playoffs. Then, you know, it was the first three, the first three rounds were best of three series, and then the last one was the best of set. And it's like, how many asterisks do you want to affix to, to that?

So at that point, just be as fucking wacky as you want. Who cares? Who gives the shit? It's all fucked up anyway. By the way. The team that wins, they're fans are going to think it counts and literally everyone else is going to give them crap about it. And even then, even then I bet a lot of those teams fans would be like, yeah, but not really, though. But look, I've seen let the whole league in proposals from some people. And I agree with you, like, everything should be on the table. But let's be honest, 31 is an odd number and there's absolutely no fucking way Detroit should be a playoff team. So let's just make it 30. That was my favorite was the one that you guys in your ESPN piece on the different ideas where the one guy was like,

let's let's let in everyone who was still mathematically alive for the playoffs, which works out to literally everybody but Detroit. I just love that. I love the idea of like 30 teams walking in and then the door slamming in the face of the red wings and be like, no, everybody but you. Yeah, well, if you're going to, if you're going to do it again, like just fuck it, let everybody in and then have a loser's bracket and the winner of the loser's bracket against Alexis Lafranier.

Oh. Like, whatever. Again, who gives, and then you're like, well, you know, what if, what if Tampa loses in the first round? And then, you know, they get to, they get to play for Alexa Lafranier, like, you know, put him on. So be it. Yeah, but fuck it. I think our friend, our friend, our friend Adam. We're all just flipping coins.

We're all just flipping coins. Who cares at that point? Yeah. Our friend Adam Gold would like to reward that sort of success. Exactly. You've, you've, you've, you've fought. way through it would get a high draft pick, right? Isn't that the whole point? Yeah. Yeah. Detroit has 39 points in a minus 122 goal differential. I mean, it's really saved by the

balance getting to minus 140. But it is just, the thing with this that is insane to me, and I understand it from a revenue perspective, but this like 24 team plan, and I know it has to be 24 because you want Montreal and Chicago to be in. Like that's, that's the whole, that's the whole reason you put the cut off there. But this idea that we're going to have more playoffs, that like we're going to come out of this at some point and be like,

yeah, you know what, four rounds, not enough. We're going to have time for five rounds or, or whatever it would look like, even a brief, like,

I feel like, and look, I did this too. Like, I wrote a piece this week where I was like, let's, let's talk about the different formats and just get weirder and weirder as we go.

But realistically, you know, it's a fun discussion, but realistically, like, I think people are being wildly optimistic over if this comes back, how much time will be available unless we want to play in August and, you know, just have guys skating around on slushies out there. Yeah, well, and that's the other thing to say about it, too, because we, right before all this happened, I read at least one, maybe. even two or three about like, wow, the compressed schedule after the All-Star game really leads to a lot of injuries. And then guys are like, okay, but what if we play at 140 games from November to June? What do you think would happen then? Exactly. Exactly.

I'll be a mini-camp to get ready. The other piece that I keep seeing is this can't just, we can't just come back and go right into the playoffs because that's not fair to the teams that are going to, just miss. They need a chance to win their way in. So we need to get everyone to 72 games or whatever it is. Like, so what are you going to do? You're going to go out, you're going to tell the Detroit Red Wings that they have to come back, leave their families, come back, practice, work out, and play two games that don't remotely matter to them. And that's your way, like, that's what's going to be fair to who makes the playoffs is that you get to like beat the Red Wings

20 to 1 because they're literally barely even, like, like, They're putting in all-star game level of effort because they just want to go home. In front of 300 people. Like, who the fuck is even going to come to these games, these regular season games? And the other thing, too, is like, part of the math and trying to come back is going to be arena availability. And you're going to be trying to reschedule your shit at the same time the NBA is trying to reschedule its shit. At the same time, Disney on Ice is scheduling its shit. concerts are scheduling a shit.

Like, well, it is, I feel like trying to bring everybody back for a few games is so overcomplicating what should be 16 buildings. Yeah, like it's not like I know, like you look in the Eastern race, right? And one of the teams that's right on the bubble is the hurricanes. Okay. So a lot of people would say they've got to have a chance to earn their way. Well, the hurricane's first game that's on the current schedule, their next game would be against the devils. What the hell is going to happen when they play? a team that's trying to make the playoffs plays, like, could a team be more checked out than the New Jersey?

Like, is that fair to the Islanders that the hurricanes get to play? You know, it's just, I mean, there's no good options. But I'll say this, the other piece of this, and like Justin Bourne had a, wrote a piece about this. Are we even talking about 16 arenas? Or are we talking about one arena? And no travel, nobody goes anywhere. Like literally 16 to, however many teams make the playoffs. come in and it's almost an Olympic village situation where you're quarantined, you're on your

own and you're playing in the same building or the same couple of buildings. Nobody gets on an airplane. Nobody's traveling around from city to city because that's just, you know, tempting. That is the single greatest idea to give the Leaf's home ice advantage in the playoffs I've ever heard. I don't even know where you would do it, man. I don't even know. The other part of this, the other part of this, too, is.

is, from a U.S. perspective, as all perspectives, which should be, correct, Ryan? Sure, yeah. Part of the other part of the math on this is if the NHL comes back for playoff hockey, end of July into August, let's say, oopsie, that is also the time that currently, currently the Tokyo Olympics are scheduled for. And the IOC has shown no indication that they are. moving off those dates. So the NHL was able to find real estate on NBC networks during the 2018 Winter Olympics because there are fewer sports in the Winter Olympics. And NBC actually used

NHL games as a lead-in to some of the Olympic coverage. If you're somebody who's consumed the Summer Olympics on NBC in the past, you know that they're putting shit on the fucking golf channel. Like every single piece of NBC real estate is being dedicated to Olympic sport, whether it's steeplechase or fucking Frisbee dogs or I don't even know what the fuck. Like every channel has something on it. So it's a little bit daunting to think that the NHL can come back and get the coverage that you'd expect for the Stanley Cup playoffs if you come back during a lumping time. What does that do to your TV deals and everything else? Like there's, like I'm with everyone. I want hockey to come back.

I want there to be playoffs. I want there to be a Stanley Cup. There's an enormous number of hurdles that. And that's even in an ideal scenario where a month or two months from now, the worst of this is over and we can all come out and kind of resume something approaching normal life. It's, I think, like I don't want to be a downer, but if you're a hockey, fan, at least start mentally preparing yourself for the fact that you're not seeing hockey again until next season, whatever that may be. And that may not be the first week of October

either. But boy, speaking of the U.S. versus Canada thing, they'll really do anything to make sure Oveichy can't catch Gretzky, huh? Like, this is fucking unbelievable. Yeah, I know. I mean, it's kind of crazy that the Canadians... Wayne Gretzky never missed any time to govah. I'm just saying. I'm not saying he's I'm not saying Canadians are, you know, but I'm just saying he, back in the day, you played. Brent Gretzky created a virus, shot it into the middle of China. You know, guys, what happened was the virus came for Wayne Gretzky, but you see, Dave Semenko was there, and he just cracked his knuckles. Look, when Gordy Howe was in the NHL in 1918 and they canceled the, you know, all that shit.

That's right. That's right. Hmm. In 1818. I'm not doing a Stan Fischer now. Sorry. Well, that's who that was. Okay.

If you say so. There it is. Well, that's one of the impressions on the show that's more of a parody than going for accuracy. Most of my impressions are accuracy. You're fucking rich little. It's unbelievable. Uncanny. How the fuck did I heard there was an impression of me.

I heard that's an impression that falls under the. That's an impression that falls under the. category of has to be in the moment. And so it was, it was an unexpected in the moment impression. And done also more importantly with you, not there. Which I think is also something that typically happens.

Like, I think it's been at a situation where I've had people, maybe, because like any master impressionist, I also do impressions of my friends and stuff. And I've definitely had situations where people like, do your impression of your friend Andy.

And I'm like, well, not to his fucking face. I mean, Ryan and I told, everyone that you died in the episode that you weren't on. So I can't really complain about

whatever maybe. By the way, has it, Greg, at any point, has it occurred to you that maybe you just went under to get your tooth out and you just haven't come back yet? And this is all like some twilight zone. Yeah, I mean, this is all Mandela effect shit.

Yeah. I'm trying to, but I'm trying to figure out like if this is all happening in my subconscious, what is the, the, the the lesson I'm supposed to learn. Because I have thought about briefly that the lesson I'm supposed to learn out of all this is to like talking to people more, like value conversations more with people at like a coffee shop or something. I'm trying to figure out like from a societal education standpoint and from my own personal growth, like what are the things I'm supposed to come out of this valuing? And could it just be that I'm under right now in the dentist office? And

I will wake up and be like, you know what? When someone tries to strike up a conversation with me, I shouldn't just completely dismiss them as being not worth my time. That's good. Maybe that's the lesson. I think. Value a personal interaction. I think what happened is you were just like lying in the dentist chair,

getting ready to go under, and you looked up and noticed that the dentist had not washed his hands, and this has all just been a fever dream of your subconscious, trying to make everybody wash their hands constantly. it could also be a situation where this is my subconscious trying to tell me that you can wash your hands other than when you shit, which is usually the only time I wash my hands to be quite candid with you. I don't know about the rest of society. Hey, by the way, did you see this shit this morning where everybody from Chicago's leadership team is sticking around for next season?

How many, how many, uh, Josh do you think this season shortening saved? that, yeah. Yeah, huh? It's a really weird one. The Stan Bowman one I get, just because there's, it's really tough organizations

to move on from guys that have built championship teams unless you're Ray Shiro. But like, Jeremy, like, Jeremy Colleton still being the coach there? Like, really? That makes a, I mean, like,

you know, what was he supposed to do? I don't know. With that group? No, with that group, I don't think he could. I think, I think the best case in for that group was always

borderline playoff team, maybe. And that's what they more or less ended up being, despite all the, you know, the season's over. Wait, the Blackhawks are for real. No, the season's over. Like the articles every other week just shifting.

Like, you know, when you do that for an entire season, you're going to end up probably on the wrong side of the playoff bubble. And like, that was always the best case scenario. I don't know what Jeremy call it and could have done differently. Yeah. I was really, you know, kind of hoping that Stan Bowman might end up in New Jersey.

Like, I think they would have hired him Lickety Split if he was available. Yeah, this is going to be if staying in Chicago. Any teams out there were already predisposed to maybe not making a move, even though that might be unpopular, this is going to make that a lot easier to sell, yeah. That's what I'm saying. Like, how many guys in the league got cover from this? Like, where, you know, they could just plausibly say, look, we're close. Or just, you know, if the offseason it is two weeks, it's like, wow, you got to. Florida.

What can we do? The offseason is going to be very fucked up, and Taylor Hall is not only not going to make the playoffs, but then he's also going to have to decide where he's going to play amongst, like, one team, probably. Yeah, nobody's going to be giving out big contracts this summer without moving substantial pieces, which is, like, you know, Edmonton's going to have to move some people around just because a team that not good is nonetheless capped out and, you know, things are getting. tighter all the time, that sort of thing. So it'll be real interesting.

Snark aside, does this exponentially increase the chances that Taylor Hall stays in Arizona? Probably somewhat. Like, they have, well, actually, they don't have money. They don't have money. They're,

they spent a shitload of money. Yeah, they're like a cap team now. I just remember. Yeah, they acquired Taylor Hall. They acquired Phil Kessel. Those are two expensive players. And I don't think there was much salary retained on either of those transactions apart from Kessel's salary retained in Toronto

from prior to the Pittsburgh trade. Who did he piss off in a former life to have all this shit happened in? Jesus, poor kid. Like a hundred years of losing teams fucking goes to the Arizona. The season ends because of a pandemic.

And they probably don't even make the playoffs based on points percentage. Oh, by the way, points percentage is the thing that should just put 16 teams in. Oh, yes. Of course, it's points percentage. Sorry, Winnipeg. If you play in an uneven number of games, that's...

Yeah, but also just like, this regular season bit, like, to go back to the playoff format thing, I've seen some people talk about, like, a 20-team thing, we have some playing games or whatever. I still think that's pie in the sky based on the amount of runway we're going to have. But if you wanted to do it, you know I'm in favor of it because at the very least people will look at them and say,

playing games are fucking cool. And then we'll get play-in games. which I want. But I think the more logical thing is that you just say, hey, look, sorry a team that played X amount of games. It's a really fucked up year. A lot of people died. And we're just going to do it by points percentage.

And then we just go from there. The right answer is the solution. I mean, I'm kind of with you. I wouldn't mind the play in games, but it's, yeah, it's, you know, I'm sorry that the Winnipeg Jets are going to literally miss the playoffs by 0.001% on, on, Points percentage, but that happens to other teams in 82 game years, and it's just sometimes close is not close enough, and this is a messed up situation, and we just got to make the best of it without trying to be, because whatever we do to make it more fair for one team is going

to make it less fair for someone else, and what can we do? Should have won that shootout. I don't know which one, but like that one. Oh, I was thinking about that, too, with, would Columbus make the cut or no? No. the game John Tortorello was complaining about our goalie our goalies got hurt or whatever and we lost in the shootout. Oh yeah. Oh God.

That becomes literally the difference between them making it and not making it and that's insanely funny to me. Yeah, they would not get in. They would be on the outside looking at against the voice percentage. I think the Islanders and the hurricanes get in. And then the Blue Jacket Stone. Insanely funny. All right.

Hockey will come back and we'll, so, We'll talk about, for those, I probably should have talked about this at the beginning of the show. Like, we're going to keep doing the show, and all the Patreon stuff's still going to be there. We've been banding about ideas on what to do with the format of the show. I think when there's news, we'll talk about it. But I think some of the shows are going to end up looking and sounding like the bonus episodes a little bit more where it's like topic focused, which will be fun. It'll give us a chance to do some different things and also probably get you guys involved in some ways as well. So, you know, news on that will come at a later date.

But we'll keep you abreast of all of the news and hockey happenings surrounding those sort of single topic episodes. We promise not to do too much wrestling, but I do think that we do have to talk about it real briefly. First of all, WrestleMania will be held in the WWE Performance Center, where they train the wrestlers. It will be held on two separate nights, like the Japanese do, and Rob Grunkowski will be the host of both nights. So that's how things are going for Vince McMahon these days. The XFL got canceled. WrestleMania is being held in a gymnasium,

and Rob Grunkowski is the host of both nights. And not even a big gymnasium. Like a very small gymnasium. Like, just seeing the – I haven't watched Raw or Smackdown in the last week, But just seeing the clips of them, you know, acting like they're in the full arena doing all the bits and playing to the crowd that isn't there and stuff, it's beyond surreal. Like, it's, it's true like a... They didn't know how to, how to acknowledge what was happening, right? Well, sure.

The only time they did it, and it was really funny is Stone Cold came out and did his whole pantomime routine, including getting on the turnbuckle and raising his arms and and like talking to the crowd that's not there and they cut to all of the empty seats and it was really funny yes it was really really clever but that was like the only time they really acknowledged that they were doing all of this stuff all their spots the whole bit inside of an empty gymnasia the only positive is that finally they can go 30 seconds without cutting to some stupid crowd shot that ruins the moment and like some guy on his phone Yeah, they'll finally get what they want, which is nobody booze Roman reign. It's going to be terrible.

People who don't follow wrestling, like, WrestleMania every year, it's supposed to be like the big season finale. But what they do is they bring back all of these old timers who aren't good anymore, but get a huge crowd reaction. And that's why you bring back The Undertaker or Bill Goldberg or John Cena or whoever. And so they're going to have all these old guys who can't really work anymore but get big reactions coming out in a gymnasium to no reaction and having terrible matches. It happened last night. The end of AEW show last night was a surprise appearance by one broken Matt Hardy in the upper deck of the arena stadium thing that they were doing their thing in. and like it's just silence, you know, like it's surprising and stuff, but you do those moments for the crowd pop and there's no crowd to pop. So it became very odd. And you feel like, you know, like this whole like edge coming back after whatever it is 10 years of like legitimately career ending neck surgery.

And he's finally going to get his first match in a decade and it's going to be in an empty building. It's going to be so strange. The other thing I saw somebody point out, and this is funny, is that, like, John Sina is legendary in wrestling. For even when he's performing in front of 50,000 people, you can hear him calling the spots in the match, like basically telling the other guy what to do. Like, all right, I'm going to close line to you. You got to duck. You got to do this.

You got to do that. So in an empty arena, my God, it's going to be, like, getting the director's commentary live. That's the thing I was thinking of, like, again, I haven't watched it live. But it seems like, you know, because they're. just in a big empty gym, like the announced teams, and presumably for WrestleMania, they'll do the, they'll have the full, you know, the Spanish and the Russian and the Japanese and the Chinese announced teams. And they'll all just be like chattering over each other and you'll be able to hear

them on each separate broadcast. It's going to be like when all the crime reporters are outside of a trial, like a really big trial and they're all like shoulder to shoulder next to each other. You can all hear them talking to their different. affiliates. I've been singing the praises of this company on this podcast since they started, but like AEW once again got it right last night. What they did, for those who haven't seen it, the WWE is playing their matches literally

inside of an empty gym. Like there's nobody in the stands. And again, calling it a gym is like a little generous. Like it's smaller than a high school gym. AEDW did their show in an amphitheater. it was empty. But what they did was they had their wrestlers come out and sit around

the ring and like talk shit during the match. Yeah, that's the way to do it. And drink wine. MJF and Sean Spears were making bets on the matches. And it was fucking cool. Like there's this

the reason I like AEW is there's a real sense of joy to what they do. And it's because the wrestlers kind of run the company. And last night, it was was very much a hey kids let's put on a show vibe but it was also the difference between one federation that has done things the same way for decades right and only knows how to do one thing which is to put on TV shows and another federation that was born doing shit on YouTube and knowing how to sell to know people in in backyards and shit like that and and

And you could really tell the difference because they knew how to pull off that show in a pretty miraculous way that I don't think the WWE could ever fucking figure out how to do. So it's pretty crazy. Right. Real brief before we get to a little quiz. Quiseroo. Anything you've been watching or reading in the last, or playing video game wise in the last two weeks? I returned to The Last of Us for the first time in several years. It's one of the best video games of all time. It's just like, you know, a real pick-me-up.

Well, yeah, you know, it's maybe not for everybody in these times, but, you know, I really love the story, and they have a sequel coming out at the end of May, so I wanted to, like, kind of, you know, get reacquainted with the whole deal with it. And it's fucking awesome. I beat it, you know, again, for the first time in four or five years the other night. And I was just like, yeah, that's really good fucking storytelling. There's no two ways about it. It's just they did a great job with it. And, you know, it's really replayable, even though it's a really linear story that has a very definitive ending. So I'm looking forward to the sequel now.

And yeah, fucking, it's so good. What about you, Shoddy? Maybe. Yeah, we've only been home for a few days, so I haven't really gotten organized. And I'm trying to balance entertaining two kids and still doing my, at this point, full-time job. So there hasn't been a ton, but the wife and I have started watching The Witcher on Netflix. And, you know, we're enjoying it. I wasn't quite sure what to expect.

I have not read the books, but I have played the video game. And I think, like, I watched the first episode and I was kind of like, you know, I don't know. Like what I wasn't really sure? Like, what tone are they going for? Is this supposed to be like a serious Game of Thrones type thing or is it kind of winking at me a bit? And it's sort of doing both. And having got into the next few episodes after that, like, it's good. We're enjoying it.

Like, we're halfway through. Yeah. Which is, I think it's only eight episodes. So got a little ways to go. But yeah, it's sort of at the end of the night, you just want to see, like, some people get stabbed in the head. It's pretty good, even though we're completely confused half the time. Because, like, every other form of entertainment these days, it's got, like, weird timeline shifting plots that

you're just like what is and the characters don't age so you're just completely thrown off but yeah it's uh we're enjoying thumbs up by the way it's got I forgot to tell like I forgot to say Top Chef back tonight damn right hell yeah let's fucking go and Padma was like all very much like I don't know how to

really say and promote my product but please watch it please watch it and she's like she's like I hope it brings you comfort and I'm like oh it's such a Padama thing to say it by the way it will I love that show so much. It will definitely bring comfort, yeah. I think at one point we said we would do a weekly show about this season of Top Chef, like on the Patreon feed or something.

If you want to do that, let's do it. I think that's a possibility. And I think the wife would have to be invited to do it. That's fine. Great. By the way, there may be some core in stream podcast with me and Ruby talking about some of the things that we've been watching that will drop on the Patreon. That's been something we've bandied about. and it all probably depends on what we're watching and how much wine we've had before we get in front of a microphone. I finished season two of you on Netflix, which is, for those who don't know, a show where Penn Badgley is basically a serial killer kind of guy, who gets obsessed with some women.

And it's twisted, but fun. And the second season takes place in L.A. and has a lot of really funny shit about how fucking dumb and weird. at LA is. And cracked open Breath of the Wild again because there's nothing that makes me happier than playing Breath of the Wild. So I did that. And I think probably soon

I'm going to crack open Golden Eye to play through that again. Because we bought the cart a few months ago at a show we were at and I haven't played it, but no time like the present. All right.

We'll probably keep you guys abreast of what we're doing. and obviously the Patreon mailbag that will be doing each week, we'll keep you abreast of what we're doing as well. But now, before we go on the main show here, I spent a good eight minutes this morning, cooking up a movie quiz for Sean and Ryan. It's a little game I like to call, Outbreak Contagion or the Happening.

I'm going to name an actor. And you tell me which movie this actor appeared in. Okay. Outbreak contagion. Outbreak of, course, the classic uh, uh,

uh, the outbreak monkey movie that had Dustin Hoffman racing against time to save society from a disease. Contagion.

The classic Steven Soderberg movie where everybody was racing against time to stop a disease. And the happening M. Night Shyamalan's apocalyptic tale

of trees trying to kill Mark Wahlberg. So I'm going to name an actor. And you tell me which one of these films the actor appeared in. Outbreak, contagion, or the happening? Who goes first? Who is our reigning champion in Puck Sub quizzes? I don't know. Probably, probably, Sean.

Sure. Yeah, I don't know. All right, great. Go for it. Okay. Sean? Yeah. Cuba Gooding Jr., Outbreak Contagent or the Happening? He was an outbreak. He was. That's correct. Yeah. He played Major Salt in Outbreak. I'll just tell you right now, I haven't seen two of those movies, but I've seen Outbreak about 30 times because I worked in a video store the summer it came to VHS. Oh, sure. So I'm not saying I'm going to get all the Outbreak ones right, but that's my only hope in all of this. Sean, what might say when I was putting this quiz together this morning, I said to myself, he's definitely seen Outbreak a lot and probably has watched Outbreak on like commercial television.

There's an outside chance he saw the happening because of N-night Shomelon. There's no fucking way he knows anything about contagion. I've seen contagion. So I was three or four times, and I don't think the test of the happening is particularly big. So I feel like I have a pretty good shot of going perfect in this one. Well, as we've talked about in the show, these are unprecedented times. And Ryan feeling pretty confident about beating Sean on a quiz. All right.

Patrick Dempsey. Patrick Dempsey. I feel like he must have been an outbreak. That's correct. He played Jimbo Scott. Oh, why wouldn't he? Yeah, sure. Sure.

Because when you look at Dr. McDreamy, you say, that looks like a Jimbo right there. Sean Brian Cranston, TV is Walter White. Yeah. He was in Contagion. That's correct. Yeah, that was a... R-A-D-M Lyle Haggerty.

What does R-A-D-M mean? Like a DM, I guess, is probably like a medical guy, right? Maybe? Maybe military? That sounds like... Yeah, I don't know. Lyle Higarty was his name. Ryan, John Leggwizamo.

It's going to be either outbreak or the happening. I'm going to say the happening, because it's maybe a little too contemporary. Yeah, okay. John Leguizamo had a career that definitely spanned, back to when outbreak came out. But he, because that was right around the time when he had his, his most memorable role as clown in Spawn. But he played trillion, as everybody knows.

Is that more memorable than Luigi Mario? I was being facetious. I was being, oh, you know, you're being facetious to my facetiousness. Facetiousness. I don't think people remember anything about Spawn other than Todd McFarlane threatening to make, make another one. I've got all the NHL figures for a long time there. Remember that? I'm not shitting on Todd McFarlane.

McFarlane toys are off. Sounds like. I'm saying the Spawn movie is terrible. Was he the guy who got sued by Tony Twist? Yes. Yes. There was a character in Spawn named Tony Twist. Yep.

Okay. See how I try to wrestle this pop culture back to hockey? To hockey. Yeah. I like it. Coming up a future. episode, a full oral history of Casey Jones from Teenage Mutiny and Ninja Turtles to tie it all together.

Donald Sutherland, Sean. Oh, Outbreak. Contagent, that's correct. He was General Donald. Yes. General Donald McClintock. That is a hell. First of all, his name was Donald in the movie.

Always is a good touch. Love that. And definitely looks like a McClintock, I think, if you look at him. All right. These are a couple tough ones. Now we're getting a little tougher. Ryan, Ferris Bueller's Day Off's own, Alan Ruck. Outbreak, Contagent, or the Happening?

That, I'm going to say the happening. That is correct. He played Principal in the Happening. Principal. Wow, principal. Good for him. Good to see he was working before he got Succession. Sticking with the theme of actors from

succession in movies about apocalyptic things happening in nature. Sean, Jeremy Strong from Succession, Outbreak Contagion or the Happening. I don't know who that is. Uh-oh. But the fact that you told me he's from... The fact that you told me he's from succession causes me to want to rule out outbreak from 25 years ago. So I'm going to say...

See, look at this man using his noodle. That's great. I'm going to say, uh, contagion. Unfortunately. Damn it. It was the happening. He played private ouster in the happening. Alan Ruck and Jeremy Strong, Ryan, both in the happening.

Wow. What a world. Yeah. So this is for the win. Okay. Lawrence Fishburn. Oh, Lawrence Fishburn is 100% in Contagion. That's correct.

He played Dr. Ellis Cheever in Contagion. Ryan wins a game in which he's seen all three movies, and Sean's only seen one of them. Now, for the bonus point. Yeah. Uh-oh. Here we go. Can you tell me, closest to the pin,

not Price's Right Rules, closest to the pin, the U.S. gross for the happening. U.S. box office gross for the happening, closest to the pin. Hmm. Now, remember, this was not a very well-received movie. Yeah.

No, but... This was pre-crisis, Shama-Lan. Let's see. What year to... The happening's what, maybe like 2007 or eight? The happening was... 2008. Okay.

I'm gonna say, like, I'm torn between... I'm gonna say like $40 million. $40 million. Exactly what I was going to say. You said U.S. Or global? U.S. Okay.

Yeah, I'm going to stick with 40. I'm going to stick with 40. That was exactly what I was going to say. I'm going to say over just because I don't trust the judgment of the American people these days. But I'm going to, yeah, 40 was exactly the number that popped in my head. 40s to me seemed like maybe slightly too high. Maybe I'd even say 35. But 40 is like a good.

way to get right in the middle there. $35 million. So you're saying $40, and then you, Sean, is going $40 million. I went over. Yeah. $40 million. $40 million.

The domestic box office gross. Okay. Here we go. I got it. It's $64.5 billion. Hmm. Sean, wow. Gets the bonus point.

I don't know what the bonus point gets. gives you or what it leads to? I just wanted to ask that question. The moral victory. It's fascinating. Moral victory. Yeah. Fair enough.

Okay. All right. Well, I hope everybody's enjoying the apocalypse. I'm Greg Wischinsky v.SPN. Please do enjoy the, the, uh, the, uh, the, all the stuff, the hockey stuff. Uh, we are, uh, I have a store, a column up today. The wish list continues unabated, uh, in which I map out a hockey week for you when there is no hockey.

So do you enjoy that. And then also, apparently, I'm being told on Twitter that Belarus is once again playing playoff games. Hell yeah. So keep that in mind. Search out Belarusian playoff games on Twitter to experience the joys of not only substandard hockey, but translated captions on the closed captioning. really a goddamn joy.

Ryan? Uh, sign up for the Patreon. I'm doing the newsletter on there, and we also have all the bonus episodes. So, uh, yeah, the newsletter, uh, obviously with not much hockey stuff to talk about. Uh, I, I'm just doing like random lists. Like, I think, uh, last week was my favorite active players. This, this week was, uh, some of my favorite kinds of hockey guys, like, uh, really fast defensemen.

and goalies who play a non-conventional style like a Tim Thomas and that kind of thing. Just guys, the kinds of guys that I enjoy watching. I like it. That's good. Can find me on the athletic. It's a sports site without any sports to write about it right now. And that has led to a lot of kind of creativity and weirdness. and anyone who reads my stuff over the years knows that during the summer I tend to go a little bit off the beaten path.

And so you can imagine when the offseason is potentially six plus months long, what that's going to look like. But I've seen some of the ideas that even some of the other guys are coming up with. And it's pretty crazy. So it's going to be interesting if you subscribe, keep checking in. and if you don't subscribe, but think about maybe cashing in a trial or something now, and because we're going to have a lot of time to sit around and read. And there's, yeah, there's some really interesting stuff coming. And this week, as I mentioned, I had that piece where I went through all different formats,

and I tried very hard to stay normal and I held it together for about half the post. And then by the end of it, I was suggesting that we hand out the Stanley Cup based on a Royal Rumble format, where all 31 teams come in one at a time and we don't know who's coming in on any given night. And it was, yeah, it's, that should kind of give you a sense of where my, where my brain is at these days. And it's going to get, it's going to get worse before it gets better. Love it. All right, everybody, thanks for listening again. Thanks for supporting the Patreon.

We're going to go do the mailbag there now. And we still have a support to give you for the rest of this month. And then as Ryan and I have indicated, with idle time, on our hands definitely going to be a lot more content I think on the Patreon podcast-wise and writing-wise and all that stuff too. All right, thanks, everybody.

Talk to you soon. Later. Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Sticks and hits and goals and saves and slapshots and goons. We've got sportly commentary to what if you commute.

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