Pursuit of Wellness - Girl Chat: Adult Friendships, Comparison, Intuitive Eating & Financial Goals w/ Taylor Teichman

Episode Date: March 10, 2025

Ep. 181: Friendship in adulthood looks a lot different than it did in our twenties. In this episode, Taylor and I open up about how we’ve built deep, supportive relationships in our thirties—what���s changed, what we’ve learned, and how to navigate everything from making new friends to setting boundaries. Taylor shares how she manifested her dream friend group after moving to Austin, and we talk about the challenges of balancing personal growth, self-doubt, and anxiety. Plus, we answer listener questions on self-worth, dealing with jealousy, and standing up for yourself in tough conversations. Leave Me a Message - click here! For Mari’s Instagram click here! For Pursuit of Wellness Podcast’s Instagram click here! For Mari’s Newsletter click here! For Taylor’s Instagram click here! Sponsored By: Ditch microplastics in your kitchen with Caraway’s non-toxic, sustainable cookware. Right now, save $150 on our favorite set—plus, get an exclusive 10% off at Carawayhome.com/MARI or use code MARI at checkout. Achieve radiant, youthful skin in just 10 minutes a day with the BON CHARGE Red Light Face Mask. Get 15% off with code PURSUIT at boncharge.com. Show Links: Boost your wellness with Bloom Colostrum & Collagen Peptides, a 3-in-1 formula for gut health, immunity, and glowing skin. Available in Unflavored & Orange Cream! Topics Discussed 00:00:00 Introduction 00:00:38 Their friendship  00:02:55 The journey of making friends in Austin 00:06:38 Adult friendships take effort 00:10:16 Practices to stay positive  00:14:45 Expo West 00:17:13 Their husbands 00:23:10 Reading star signs 00:34:18 How to handle busy schedule and time for friends 00:35:35 How to find like-minded people in an area where nobody cares 00:37:46 What to do when you feel you haven’t accomplished enough in life? 00:40:53 How to navigate triggers/anxiety around family? 00:44:28 How to listen to the body with intuitive eating? 00:49:14 How to maintain a friendship in different financial situations? 00:52:38 How to advocate for yourself in a doctor’s office? 00:55:32 Adult female friendships 00:58:00 How to navigate through guilt when setting boundaries? 01:00:42 How to not compare yourself to other similar entrepreneurs in Austin? 01:05:03 How to support your best friend’s relationship that you disagree with? 01:08:51 How to stop being affected by others' opinions 01:11:56 What Mari’s lifestyle will be like once she’s pregnant

This is the Pursuit of Wellness podcast and I'm your host, Mari Llewellyn. I feel like my accent changes based on who I'm talking to. I don't think it changes. Do you know why I think it doesn't change with you? Because I feel comfortable with you. We're already recording. It's perfect. Welcome back to another Girl Chat.

Today we have a new Girl Chat guest. Tay Tay! So excited to be here, honestly. We've been talking about this for a while guys. Taylor is one of my closest friends in Austin. We've been friends for only a year, which feels bizarre. I don't even think a full year. Which is so insane, but I feel like we met at a very pivotal moment.

For sure. In both of our lives and we've already been through so much that it feels like a thousand years. And also like when I met you, I felt like we can make decisions together because we were like, oh, she wants to do this too. Like she knows what she wants and like we're both totally aligned.

It's a dynamic that like I've never, I don't think I've ever had in my life, but it makes a lot of sense to me. For context, guys, I'm a Gemini and Taylor is a Capricorn. And also just your personality, I feel, is very grounded, calm, logical, caring. And I'm caring too, but I feel like I tend to be a bit more like all over the place Making quick decisions like we just have a very we're very different but very similar in a lot of ways for sure Like you balance me out is how I feel sometimes like you're up in the clouds and I have to bring you back down

Period. Yeah. Yeah period, but you've been there for me I mean guys like they all know what I've been through yeah, and you've been there for me. I mean, guys, like they all know what I've been through. Yeah. And you've been there for me and vice versa. And it's been a really beautiful friendship. And guys, I've been dying to get Taylor on the mic because she gives me the best advice. And I know she's going to give you guys the best advice. And we're going to talk today about adult friendships, anxiety, going through hard things, just all this stuff you go through in your 30s, basically.

Yeah. It's a wild ride out there. It really is. You hit your late 20s and shit hits the fan. Shit hits the fan and this stage of our lives is just kind of wild. I was saying to Greg the other day, I feel like life kind of just gets, this sounds depressing, but I don't mean it in this way. Life gets harder and harder,

but we just get more and more capable. For sure, like you know, you're equipped with more information and you're able to make better decisions, like as you move forward, like a lot of things come at you, but you're able to kind of take everything on. Don't you think?

Better tools, better decision-making, A lot of things come at you, but you're able to kind of take everything on. Don't you think? Better tools, better decision-making, and also you figure out who you want around you. For sure. Which I feel like is so important, so important. Oh my God, I can't imagine the last year without you and our other friends. Literally, night and day.

I mean, when I moved to Austin, I was super depressed because I only had my husband and we moved here for his job. And I literally had literally not a single friend. Yeah, you've told me about that. And it was such a sad time. And I remember saying to myself, it's gonna take a year. It's gonna take a year.

And literally when a year hit, I had friends. What did you do to put yourself out there and make friends? Honestly, I was so depressed and in my feelings for so long. And I was like, I have to change this, I have to change this. And I swear to God, Marie, manifested. Every single night I'd go to bed and I'd be like, I will have friends. This is going to be my home. I need to be happy. And I told myself over and over and over again. And I feel

like that's a lot in my life. I feel like that's a lot of the ways that I do things. I'll always try to manifest it and picture it. And when I did that, all of a sudden friends started coming out of the woodworks. Our friend Nikki moved back. She was the connector to so many people and all of a sudden we were busy every single weekend, busy every single night. My friends from home were calling me and being like, how are you so busy? I am exhausted looking at what you're doing all the time. But it kind of just opened up the world.

It was crazy. When I moved to Austin and I met you and the other girls, I was like, oh my gosh, these girls do so much. I remember being like so overwhelmed because in LA I had no friends. Like similar to you, I just had Greg. And it was a little unhealthy for a while because I would put all my eggs in Greg's basket, so to speak.

Like I would rely on him for everything, emotional support, hanging out. Like I didn't have anyone else. And then when I moved here and I met you guys, it was such a blessing, first of all, because I feel like because of Sammy, I met all of you at once and immediately. I mean, it wasn't immediate.

Like I feel like our friendship definitely took some time and some like solo hangouts, but I remember being like, oh my God, these girls do so much. Like they hang out on weekdays, they hang out on weekends. They have, I mean, it was constant. It's crazy to come into your 30s and come in with like so many friends.

Yeah. Like I feel like at this age, I've said this to so many people, you start to lose your friends and pick who you want to be around. But to come into like a group of friends is very unheard of. Yeah. And it comes with like navigating things as well. But it's really amazing to move to a new city that's so young and so hip and so fun. And then be able to do all these fun things with people, like go on the lake, go out to dinner, like do pottery, go on walks. We live in a fun place.

Yeah, we do. And I also feel like with friendship, you really have to want it. Like what you were just saying with manifesting. I wanna come back to that too, because you're really good with positive self-talk and I'm not, so I wanna talk about that, but you have to want it.

I remember when I first met you guys, I was getting invitations to a lot of different things and I remember feeling a little bit of resistance because I wasn't used to leaving the house so much. And then when I started saying yes and just going and like letting go control, that was when I was like, oh, I really need to put in an effort.

I need to get to know these girls, like invite them to my house. Like it really, not that it's transactional, but adult friendships do take effort. I think too, when I think back to when we started to be friends, you really do at this age have to like girl flirt and like really put in the effort. Like I remember when I first called you, I was like sitting in the dog park with my dog

and I like want to, I think you went out of town somewhere. I think you had one to like Jackson or not Jackson. You went to like brush Creek or something. And I was like, how was your weekend? Like tell me about it. Oh my god. Do you remember that? Yes. I remember you were caught so off guard, but I was like, I really just genuinely

want to know like how was it? Like it looked so fun, but it's like you have to take those little steps in order to really like flourish in that relationship and like gain each other's trust. You really do. No, you're I remember that call and I was like, something must be wrong. Yeah, you were so confused. I was like, can I help you?

Something wrong. And you were like, I'm literally just checking in. And I was like, people do that? Honestly, I didn't know. I think a lot of the way that I treat friends, I do think I'm a good friend and I'm- You definitely are a great friend. You really are. Thank you. And I feel like I'm a good friend and I'm you definitely are a great friend. You really are

Thank you. And I feel like I've gotten to like flourish in that part of myself Yeah, that I've never really gotten to before because I've been so focused on bloom. I haven't gotten to experience Sure, you've been so heads down for years like focusing growing this business and have done an amazing Incredible job with it, but it's, at some points you kind of lose a little aspects of your life. But you have to, you can't live without friends for your entire life, that's for sure. It was a season for sure.

But I feel like you have taught me a lot about being a good friend. I think I put a lot of emphasis on friends. I think some of my deepest and longest friends will always be with me forever because I just feel so deeply passionate about those people and I'll always make space for them. They're probably listening.

They probably are. I've told them to. Alex, Nicole, Natalie. The girls. I also keep thinking about Chelsea, your sister right now. No, she would love to sit in this seat. Our queen. Our queen. She would just go.

You guys, my sister literally had a very interesting college experience. She had a very traumatic thing happen in college and literally found herself through all of it and was like, after school, I'm not going to go back. I'm not going to go work how you guys not going to go like work how you guys do. I'm going to go travel the world. And she literally traveled South America by herself with a backpack.

Like, Mari and I were like, how do you do it? We are still there. We were FaceTime with her. Now she's in Oaxaca, but we were FaceTime with her and she was like, here's my house, guys. And Mari and I were like, oh my God, you are crazy, but we love you. Crazy. You met her and you like instantly connected with her I I immediately connected with her. I was like, I feel like this girl's looking into my soul

Yeah, she's good at that. Yeah, like looking into my soul and she makes you feel really listened to yeah And then when she's speaking you're like, how is this girl so wise like she's like she's so young She's six years younger than I six years younger Yeah she gave us like a tour like a FaceTime tour of where she was living in the middle of wherever she was. Crazy. Guadalajara, I don't know where she was,

but it was like, oh my gosh, this girl's alone. Yeah. And she was like, I love it here. She was so enthusiastic and passionate about her life. And we were like, reality check. Yeah. You know? We're a little crazy sometimes.

We're a little crazy. A little delude. I mean, I can say that for sure. I live in delusion all the time. It's a nice way to live. I wanted to talk about, you know I've been trying to practice positive self-talk because it's something I struggle with.

And I know that you kind of have like, you honestly have a lot of practices, I feel like you do day to day that really help you. Can you share with the gals, like some of the things you do to stay positive? Yeah, I, whenever, like I'm not a very religious person, like I've grown up Jewish, like we different than you, like we don't go to church every weekend.

But I just think when I get in bed at night, I always have said, and I've said this to so many people, like I will get in bed and I will go over my day and just like think the day and just be like so happy, like tell me what was the best thing that happened today and like I'll talk to myself and I'll even sometimes ask my husband like because I want him to get involved. But I just I really try to flip the script on everything when there is bad things happening, like I really try and focus on what the good is coming out of it and I do that with a lot. And I think that, like, again, in your 30s, things are so confusing. But you have to be able to talk to yourself in such a positive manner.

And I feel like with you, I've seen a lot of self-doubt and like that negative talk about yourself, which makes me feel so sad. But I always try to like bring you back up to it because I'm like, you really have an amazing life. Like you really are such an amazing person. And like, even if you are having anxiety, something that you can totally get through. Like it's so temporary. Yeah, Taylor is like the person I go to

if I'm having any problem at all. Because I think the way I grew up, I love you mom and dad if you're listening, but they didn't have the best emotional regulation or coping skills. And what I watched at home is what I replicated and the way that they spoke to themselves, the way they spoke to me.

But I think with all the therapy that you've done, I think it's really amazing to recognize that and be able to be like, I'm not going to be like that. Totally. From my kids and show up super differently. Because at the end of the day, it's amazing that you can recognize that. I mean, all of our parents passed down trauma to us. It's just the ability to break through it. 100%.

And it's so motivating to think, if I just put in an effort to change my habits every day, I could really make a difference for someone else's existence. Oh, for sure. I think it's also about taking little steps every day. Mm-hmm. It's small. For sure.

I know you started this too, but like we're starting to journal in the morning just because there's like a lot of stuff both going on in our lives. So it's just, it's really nice to actually see what comes out on paper. Yes, the journaling I feel like is massive. Yeah.

The praying that I've, I call it praying. I don't, I don't, it doesn't have to be praying, but like just talking to someone and saying like, thank you for this life I live. Thank you for my dogs. Thank you for my health. Like thank you for my walking legs. Like thank you for the food I eat.

Like just every little thing. And you really come out of it and looking at the day differently. For sure. It's interesting, I saw this on Instagram that if you talk to someone for 12 minutes a day, have you seen this? No.

When you talk to someone for 12 minutes a day, it can actually turn your whole day around. And I feel like me and you are so good about calling each other in the middle of the day. You go through so many things during the day, like your podcast recording, you're here, you're testing greens and drinking drinks and all, you're like all over. Acupuncture. Acupuncture and facials and all the things. But it's like you always make it around to calling me, and I feel like those 12 minutes and even usually it's probably a little bit more for us, but like it honestly like really resets both of us, I feel like.

I agree. And even if you can just give your friend like a quick call, I mean, I call all my friends during the day, like I feel like. I agree. And even if you can just give your friend like a quick call. I mean, I call all my friends during the day, like I need to talk to someone. Yeah, yeah, just to run through things like touch base. We, you know, sometimes it's just a catch up and like a little giggle, but sometimes we're calling and we're like, I need help.

I mean, sometimes I call you crying, especially the last few weeks, but yeah, like even yesterday, I was going to tell you this when we were going through. So there's like a huge conference next week. I think I've told you guys about it before called Expo West. And it's kind of like the New York Fashion Week of supplements and of the health industry. And Expo West is a huge deal for Bloom. I go every single year. And this year, I'm in the countdown to my transfer. I'm in this very unique window of time in my life.

And for the first time, I was like, huh, I don't know if I should go. And I've been so torn on it, like so back and forth. And, you know, my acupuncturist said to me, do you want to put energy into your career or your womb which sounds really black and white but that kind of is what it's down to. And we know the answer obviously. Right my initial answer was like my womb obviously but then I you know I'm around Greg who's so excited about it and I'm getting influenced from so many different people and I

was with Taylor in the car yesterday we went to the barn together. And side note, I have literally always wanted to go to Expo West, like it is a dream of mine, which we will one day. We will, next year. Next year. But I wanted Taylor to come with me, but it just wasn't working out for our schedules. But like, I was still considering going

and we were in the car and I was like, Taylor, can I actually just, for a minute, and I struggle with this a lot. I talk about it in therapy with like knowing what I truly want, whether it's like what I want to eat, what I wanna do, it sounds crazy, but I struggle finding that inner voice sometimes. And I was like, can I actually just run through

the entire schedule with you and visualize what it will be like? So I actually out loud. We went through every day. Went through every day, like every car ride, every situation. And as I was telling you, I was like, yeah, no. Yeah, no. Literally halfway through, I was like, no.

No, because like, I mean, we know like the alone time was just like going to be astronomical and just like the pressure of it all. It's not, it wasn't worth it. Not worth it. But it's so incredible that Bloom has such a big presence and like they're gonna do so great with or without you and we love Bloom. It's, Bloom is my child and I feel like I'm missing my child's biggest recital of all time.

Yeah, that's true. Do you know what I mean? Yeah, I mean we were talking about this yesterday. I know. It's crazy. Wait, can, a little bit of a pivot, but can I read them our star sign descriptions? Okay.

Taylor and I obviously send each other like a lot of memes and quotes and stuff on the internet, like every best he does. Yeah. But we found- Also like sending memes and things are like my love language and like my husband, like I'm sure so many people relate,

but like I send him so many DMs and he's, I'm like, did you see this one? And he's like, no. I'm like, these are picked out for you perfectly. Curated. Curated, perfectly curated. If I'm sending you a meme, be sure to look at it. Period. Taylor's intentional. She's not. That one's for Jake. I'm just, Jake, you better be listening. Greg, you better be listening. Greg has never listened to my podcast. Jake and Greg just send each other DMs. They talk you better be listening. Greg has never listened to my podcast. Jake and Greg just send each other DMs. They talk about all the time.

Watches, cars. Animals, it's weird. At least their For You pages are not what we would be afraid of. For sure, exactly. Our husbands, they're good husbands. They're great husbands. Their For You pages are appropriate.

They're appropriate, completely. Also, we didn't even mention that we've both been with our husbands. I mean, I've been with mine for 10 years. Therefore you pages are appropriate. They're appropriate completely. Also we didn't even mention that we've both been with our husbands. I mean, I've been with mine for 10 years. You've been with yours. We're coming up on 10 this summer. Crazy. Yeah.

Like since high school you've been with your mans. We met in high school and we started dating in college. So like that has also given us a very common thread. For sure. We that like we can empathize with each other and the fact that like sometimes our husbands can be super annoying. But we also love them so deeply because we've been with them so long. We grew up with them. Yeah. And like we changed. We've been so many different versions of ourselves. I mean, you too, like so many different versions of ourselves. I mean, you too. So many different versions of ourselves with our husband

and they love us more today than they did. It's very different to a lot of our friends who met their husbands three, four years ago. A decade. It's crazy. You see different versions of your partner and it's really wild. I mean, what, we were 20?

Literally 20 years old. I remember gifting Jake a birthday present for his 21st birthday because he's a year older than me. I remember toying with Greg's feelings at 20 years old. Yeah, because I remember gifting Jake a birthday present for his 20th birthday because he's a year older than me. I remember like toying with Greg's feelings at 21 years old. You're like, I remember giving a gift. I'm like, I remember fucking with him. Being on the beach in Southampton, can't hang out, sorry. I'm busy.

Yeah. But it makes such a big difference because like, yeah, it's just different. I can't explain it. And like, I feel like when you get to this point in a marriage or a relationship, there's different efforts that you need. Like you almost need to remember to put the effort in and make it magical and sparkly and like, oh, for sure.

You know, because when you're with someone for that long, you almost, not that you take it for granted, but sometimes you forget that you're lucky. Yeah, you're so lucky. I mean, I think about our story, like the reason Jake and I met was out of chance. Like my best friend basically got diagnosed with type 1 diabetes out of nowhere. We were supposed to go do it like a teen tour community service trip in Fiji. And we were like, we can't go that far. She has to refrigerate her medication. And I was so concerned about her health. And we ended up going to USC and did a summer program. And no one wanted to be friends with Alex and I,

because we were so clicky and Jake was our only friend. Wait, I didn't realize Alex was like involved in the story. Yeah, no, remember the texts I read you the other day? Yes, I know I'm putting it together. We can also bleep her name if we want to. No, she doesn't care. Okay, great. Hey Alex.

That's hilarious. Yeah, no, she, I mean, she's the reason that we met. And I always think back to like, it's such a divine timing and like you and Greg, like going to the same high school and going to the same college, like that's crazy. It's crazy. And then we just fucking build a business together.

Yeah. Like what? It's wild. It's so crazy. It's so wild. Like the stars are aligned, which perfectly segments into our star signs. Why are you better at a podcast than me? Like, should I retire?

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["Dreams of a New World"] Capra Corns as best friends. Yeah. This is you. Has their life together or at least pretends to? Yeah. You do. I do.

You 100%. At least from the front for sure. Like Taylor comes to my house and like does my dishes and like organizes my closet and is like, are you okay? Yeah, I'm like, I'm very motherly. Like we're checking up and like making sure everything is like buttoned up. Yes, everything's buttoned up. We'll keep going because I have stories. Actually, perfect. Low-key judges your bad decisions, but helps you anyway. Yes. Yeah. It's me.

Taylor will call my ass out. I will. She will. I'm just very honest and like to a fault, but like I think that's why like my friends call me for advice. Yes, you're not lying to anyone. You're not sugarcoating anything.

I'm not. And like if something doesn't align, the other day I'm like, Yes, you're not lying to anyone. You're not sugarcoating anything. I'm not. And like if something doesn't align, the other day I'm like, okay, you know what? That's cute, but like this would be cuter. Yeah, or something even deeper. Like remember when I made that mistake. Which mistake? I like...

Delete that. That mistake I made where I was like, given the fact that my brain has been a scrambled egg lately, and I've been a bit distracted, I haven't been great with responding to text messages other than people that I really care about. And I just don't have as much capacity. And it has caused me to perhaps be a bit, what's the word? I think you just have de-prioritized things that aren't important to you.

Period, and I have some oversight maybe. And I kind of made a mistake that I got called out for. And Taylor was like, yeah, you definitely made a mistake, but we can fix it. Yeah, no doubt. The friend who drives you home safely at 3 a.m. We are not in that phase of our lives, but I know that you would.

Yeah, I would. We'll call you out, but only because they care, as we've discussed. Doesn't have a ton of friends, but is insanely loyal to the ones they do. Yeah, which I've already explained. Yeah, I agree. Like I would rather have three friends than have 10.

And I think that comes with the age too. But again, like one, you're loyal to me and I'm loyal to you, like you're there forever. I agree. I also just wanna say guys, like at this stage of our lives, to even have one or two good friends is a blessing. Totally.

You don't need 10 friends. In fact, I don't think any of us have time for 10 friends. No. I also think like when I think back to my wedding, like I had six girls, like including my, I think it was six girls, literally including my sister and my sister-in-law. And I was like, this is perfect. Except I wasn't there. Yeah. And like all my new friends weren't there, but it was like quality over quantity. Yeah.

It's such a big, such a big thing. I agree. And I think maybe 10 years ago we would have been like, oh my God, I have 15 friends. I'm in a huge friend group, but like, no one cares. No one cares except maybe to flex on social media, which is a whole other conversation. But I also just want to say, I think it's okay to speed date and have a lot of friends

and then narrow down on the people that you're like, I really vibe with this person. And I feel seen by this person. It's okay. It's okay to find your people in a group. Totally. We'll force you to apply to jobs and fix your resume. Okay. The thing about Capricorns is like they're very hardworking. Yeah. And like that's just kind of like what always the star signs always say about Capricorns. I totally got that.

I think when I put my head to something, like I will do it. Yeah. I think it depends on the season of life you're in. Like everyone has different goals for different things. But I would say that you, when you do something, you really commit to it. For sure. And you do it detail-oriented, whereas I'm like, ah. Which is also a good and a bad thing.

I think that I've always loved cooking, and I used to have a little platform for it, and I think that sometimes I get so caught up in wanting something to be perfect, and you're always like, just try it, it just do it yeah which for me it's a little bit of like I don't know perfectionism I guess yeah like control freak yeah yeah I don't struggle with that yeah it's like throw it at the wall and see I'm learning to just really really really let that go I think that's

yeah I I do notice that about you, but you do things really well. Thank you. Whenever you do them, like bring the cooking page back. We love it. Yeah, I just like as a first born, you know, like wanting to always prove that like I got good grades and I could go to a good school and I could do X, Y, and Z, even though like my parents never put that pressure on me

because they were amazing, but that was just a me thing. That's funny. Yeah. I'm first born too. I'm still learning to let that go. I was more like, how much trouble can I cause? How reckless can I be? Maybe they'll pay attention to me if I do that.

And then I was like, wait, actually, I'm going to accomplish so much that they can't ignore me. We were really opposite. Yeah, yeah, totally. Yeah. Then I was like, oh, I'm gonna like achieve everything and then they'll notice me. It's good to know that both strategies work though.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you'll be fine. You'll be fine. I mean, I almost wasn't, but it worked out. But we made it, we made it, we're here. Barely. Hanging on by a thread, but we're here. And then, oh, this is so you coded. Fun for them is deep convos, success planning, and expensive dinners.

I don't know about the expensive dinners. You're kind of down for whatever. Yeah. I feel like moving to Austin there is not really like... Yeah. Well, you lived in Dallas. That's where you... We did live in.

And I feel like I just love a good dinner. I do. You like food. I love food, but I think that like sitting and talking, especially with like a few people, like group settings have always been a little bit hard for me. I think sitting down, talking deep conversations

with like a few people, going to nice dinners, of course I love that. Yeah, you are really, you're also very engaging and you ask people a lot of questions. I do, I'm naturally curious. You're very, very curious. Yeah. You are. And what I love about Taylor too, is like, for example,

when you went to Big Bend. My favorite place in the world. She loves Big Bend. It's like, can you explain what it is? It's in the city of Tlingua and it's literally on the border of Mexico and Texas. And my husband and I have been twice and we stay at this amazing hotel called Willow House.

Greg's actually there right now and he's like, this place is amazing. But I'm like, I am just obsessed with it. And every time I go, I'm like, I feel like the most pure version of myself out there. It's so quiet and like you hear your ears ringing. And like, we went over, well, was that Christmas? And we were like, I was trying to get you to come.

But it was like the most, it was literally the most serene place in the world. But where were you going with this? I was gonna say what I love about you is you get so excited about small things. You'll be somewhere, you'll be like, I'm freaking out. It's so quiet. And there's this cactus and I'm just upset. You'll just get so excited. I do. And when I go to Little Bodega, we went to that tiny grocer. I'm like,

let me walk the aisles. I need to just literally breathe in what's going on here. But it makes me want to take you to where I grew up. I would appreciate it. Yeah, to Granny's house in the Cotswolds because I think you would just die. grew up. Yeah, I would appreciate it. Yeah, to granny's house in the Cotswolds because I think you would just die. Well, we're already gonna do that. We're going, we're going.

And then to Long Island, like I wanna show you it all because you get so excited. I do get so excited. Should I read my bullet points? Yeah, you read yours and I'll reflect on them. Gemini is a best friend. Talking to them equals three hour convos that go from deep life to gossip.

Yeah. Yeah, I like to yap. You do love to yap. I was thinking about this this morning when I was doing my makeup and I was like, the reason Mari does have this platform is like she really just loves to yap. I love a yap.

You do, nothing wrong with that. Gossip is sharing information. It is, and you're good at sharing information. To protect myself. Whether it's like, whether we're talking about a founder from a wellness brand or... Sally down the street. Yep.

Watch out for Sally. Can read your mood instantly and adapt to it. You're good at that. Yeah. You're pretty much like a chameleon, I feel like. Yeah. You can like really, I feel like. Yeah. You can like really, I feel like it's a skill to be able to connect with people

and like see what's going on. Cause I feel like you're good at reading. And this like comes, we've talked about this like with your childhood, like you had to read through a lot of emotions of people and things. Hypervigilant. Yeah.

So you like when you're in a room with someone, like you can totally match it. I look at their eyes, their tone, but in the same vein, if someone's talking to me and their face is like, like if they look, I might have Botox so I can't do it, but like Greg has a bad listening face, like he scrunches his face.

He's reacting. You feel judged. I'll be like, I'll stop mid-sentence and be like, is something I'm saying upsetting you? Because I'm so paranoid about people's expressions. Unmatched meme game, we'll send you the funniest TikToks before you even see them.

You do. But okay, so I haven't re-downloaded TikTok because I was one of the ones, I was one of the ones impacted. A foreign soldier. I was. I was fully addicted to TikTok, but I would send Mari videos and then she would try to

send them back to me. I'm like, girl, I already saw these and I already sent them to you. So yeah, I'm not as like careful as you. I kind of just like blast things off. Yeah, it's okay. Yeah, that's fine. That'll like be a problem one day. It already has been a problem.

Super social, but if you're their bestie, you're their number one priority. For sure. Yeah. Period. Forgets to text back, but somehow knows everything in your life. I feel like that's 50-50 for you.

It's like selective. Sometimes you say selective hearing. I'm a little selective, I feel. I don't have, I mean. If you wanna know what's going on in someone's life, you will 100% know. That's true, right? That's true.

Yeah. Encourages all your bad but fun decisions. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. You do. I'm not the friend who's gonna be like, well, maybe think about it. Yeah, Mari's like, this is my answer.

Yeah. But sometimes you have a hard time like making those decisions for yourself, which is where I come in. True. Yeah. But if you come to me and you're like. You're like, you need to do this. I'm like Yeah. But if you come to me and you're like- You're like, you need to do this.

I'm like, okay, are you sure? Like, do we have a plan? Like, what are we doing? But if you come to me and you wanna buy like a crazy bag that you're obsessed with, I'm like, fuck it. Yeah. You know. I'm a little more like, just do it. Yeah.

Now we're gonna move on to some questions. We have some Q&A box questions, and at the end of the episode, the grand finale, we're gonna listen to some voice messages, which I haven't done in so long. I know, I'm excited. Mari wouldn't let me listen to them, so we're listening to them for the first time. Taylor likes to be very prepared and I was like, no, no, no, you need like, I want your raw real reaction.

Yeah. How do you guys manage busy schedules and getting time to hang out together? I mean, I work a nine to five job. I really prioritize my time before work and after work. I, like Mari, her and I wake up very early and we're like, well, let's do a workout at 6.30, let's do a workout at 7 or we'll walk the lake. And we'll always get in our time. And I think after work, we're really good about like, we want to do dinner, we usually do dinner like once a week or see each other on the weekend and go for a walk. But always like, I feel like a quick FaceTime is always

like something you can do. Feels like a hangout. Totally feels like a hangout. This is also where it's helpful to have a friend that like wants to do the same things as you because I know that you're down to just come to my house and cook and just sit on the couch. Sometimes with certain people, it feels like it has to be a production.

Like, we have to go out and do this and that. With you, I'm like, walk, come to the barn with me, whatever, we're always kind of down. And we also, sometimes we'll love to do activities. We did pottery, which was really fun. For my birthday, I think. Yeah, that was so fun. And like, that's just like an easy thing to book.

And like we had the best time, it was two hours. Yeah, and our husbands get along. I did it on a day off. Which is nice. So we'll do dinners, like we have a dinner on Saturday. How to find like-minded people when it comes to health and wellness, no one in my area cares.

It's a good question. Interesting. I think this is where the internet comes in handy. For sure. You know? And also I think just like going to places where you wanna hang out, like I feel like meeting people at the gym. I feel like the gym here, I mean, I go to Equinox like a few times a week

and I take a lot of the classes or just work out by myself. And I think that like, if you're in the mood to be chatty, like people will chat with you. For sure. Yeah, shoot your shot. Honestly, like compliment a girl on her. Love a good compliment. Yeah, compliment a girl.

I always try to do that. It starts the combo. For sure, and like if you guys, if you have like the same bag or you have like, you know, the sweatshirt brand she's wearing, like throw a good compliment, for sure. Anyone at the gym or in your class like cares about fitness, you know the sweatshirt brand she's wearing, like throw a good compliment for sure. Anyone at the gym or in your class cares about fitness. And even like a coffee shop.

I feel like Austin's so unique though, cause it's a very social city. I would be interested to know where this person lives. Same. Yeah. Like I'm picturing like- Like is it like, yeah, is it like Seattle? I don't know much about like the-

Seattle. Yeah, like up there. Like is it like, yeah, is it like Seattle? I don't know much about like the- Seattle. Yeah, like up there. Like is it New York? Like I feel like we can talk about that. New York scares me. New York really scares me. I'm not a New York girl. It really scares me.

Like I don't know that we would have friends there, honestly. That place overwhelms me to a T. I'm like, we're not going out every night. Those people go out every night. I know, every night. Damn. I would be like filled up up with just canola oil. Canola oil and anxiety.

Yeah. I mean, I lived there for a year and I honestly had the worst anxiety of my life. I left a vet appointment because I couldn't handle it. Does Greg like it though? Yes. And Jake loves it. Oh my God. But they're so similar.

They're so similar. Greg was laying in bed the other night and he was like, I miss New York City. Yeah, Jake's like, I love that energy here. I'm like, what energy? I'm like, I need the suburbs. Yeah, seriously. I actually can't gather my thoughts because I'm just listening to everyone else's conversation

and reading everyone's facial expression. I'm so overstimulated. So overstimulated. I'm in everyone's conversation. Yeah. Yeah, no, okay. Sorry, I'm not on the tangent. But maybeimulated. Like I'm in everyone's conversation. Yeah. Yeah, no, okay. Sorry, I'm not into it. But maybe we'll go to New York at some point.

Yeah. What to do when you feel like you haven't accomplished enough in your life? That's a great question. Go for it, sis. I feel like, honestly, I feel like that's sometimes about myself. I mean, it's hard, like comparison is the thief of joy.

I feel like I look at you and I'm like, oh my god, she has done so much and she's 30 years old. Like you have built this huge company, but it's almost like you cannot compare yourself to other people at all. I always think like when I envision success for me and for my husband, I always feel like this is something that's going to be like later in life. Like this is like, and it's teaching you a lesson now. Yeah. So that you have like, like we said earlier, like all the information together and then you can like learn off of that success.

Totally. Right? Also, I'm not going to remember all these names, but there are so many hugely successful entrepreneurs who hit their success at like 45, 50. Like Kris Jenner, I saw this video the other day. Right, like I wish I had all the names in my head, but you know what I mean? Like I'm such an anomaly and not a good example.

And I also think the grass is always greener. Like someone might look at my life and say, I wish I had that. And then I look at freaking Julia Havens on the internet and I'm like, I want her life. I want to be pregnant and have a kid already. You know, like everyone wants what they don't have. For sure. Will you read the question one more time? It was just like what to do when you feel like you haven't accomplished enough in life. I think it's just like, honestly being super positive and like taking little steps every

day. I think when I was so sad in Austin and I didn't have that many friends, I journaled and I did something for me every day and then you can see with those small steps, months later, that you've taken one giant step. Yeah, also, tell me if you don't want me to talk about this, but I feel like watching you with your passion for cooking and just like how much you love it

and then watching you like dip a toe and like cooking for people and kind of going all in on that. We took a little pause, but now we're maybe back. I don't know. It was really cool. We will be back. And like, I just love cooking. It like lights my soul on fire.

And I've been to some energy healers, and they're like, your brain turns on when you cook. Which to me makes so much sense because I feel so relaxed at the end of the day. During the work day, I'm so riled up and so many things going through my head. But when I step into the kitchen to make dinner for us, I'm totally at peace.

And then it was almost the second that you threw yourself back into it, it was almost like the second that you like threw yourself back into it, it was working. It was working and then I just kind of got a little bit overwhelmed and a lot of things were going on in my life. It was a lot at once. But I'm honestly gonna step back into cooking.

So like if anyone needs any cooking in Austin, I'm around. Taylor makes the best food. I do make really good healthy, like dairy free, gluten free. And you can just DM her. Yeah. At any time of the day. We're going to like figure this one out. We're going to figure this one out. And I'm just saying that as an example, because I feel like that was like such a great stepping stone.

For sure. To what you want to do with your life. Yeah. Triggers slash anxiety, especially around family, how to navigate. I feel like I've dealt with this a lot in therapy. It's really just like really taking a step back. Yeah. And I feel like sometimes've dealt with this a lot in therapy. It's really just like really taking a step back. And I feel like sometimes when you get older, you start to realize like things that your family or your parents do that is really different from you and triggers you.

But being able to recognize that and then like either saying what you wanna say and not biting your tongue and being able to be confident with that decision. I think for so many years I was just like, I'm going to do what my parents tell me, I'm going to follow suit, but I'm an adult now. They're going to respect that about me. I think being able to get through that is really important. I think that sometimes,

I mean, I tell you all the time, sometimes, I mean, I love my parents, but sometimes they can overstep. And I've gotten to a place where I'm like, you know what? Let them. Let them. Mel Robbins. We love Mel Robbins. Our queen. We can't do anything about it. And also like I try to remind myself this of all the time. This is my parents first time on this earth. Same with yours. Same with ours. And like we're going to make mistakes and they're going to make mistakes.

And that's so okay. And you're building your own life too. Yeah. And you have to treat that with kindness. Agree. Like they're doing their best. They're doing their best. We're doing our best. Yeah. I have a very, I think the word is visceral. I have a very visceral example for this that I experienced a lot. I noticed even after all the therapy I did, all the work I did when I was like a

fully accomplished developed adult with Bloom, with my husband, whatever, The second I would walk into my childhood home in Scarsdale, before my dad sold it, I would dissociate. Like fully leave my body and enter this weird like high school version of you. It was bizarre. And I would suddenly be sensitive and it would, I would literally feel it happen in my body. And my therapist would have me before I walk in the house, like a grounding exercise, like mindfulness, like touch, smell, sight, like breathe. Like I am Mari, I am 28 years old or however old I was at the time.

I have a business, I have employees, I have a husband. Like this is who I am 28 years old or however old I was at the time. I have a business, I have employees, I have a husband. This is who I am. I don't have to be so affected by this. Was your dad in that house? Was that the house that you grew up in? I've moved so many times. I've lived in 15 houses. But that was the main one.

And that was where all the turmoil really took place later in my life. My parents just sold their house. I grew up there. We lived there for 18 or 20 years, something like that. And I felt the same exact way when I went home. You have to dissociate almost. Yeah, it's bizarre.

It's bizarre. Because you're a different person. But I want to show up as me, when I'm with my family. But it's hard because you look at them and you remember, I mean, it's just weird. I was just talking about this with my parents, it's crazy that like when you, after the age of 18,

the amount of time that you, the amount of less time that you spend with them, from like now until, you know, they're here, it's crazy. Like I think I've heard a stat before. I'm not going to forget, but you only get a certain amount of summers with your kid. Yeah, I think, yeah, 18 summers. 18 summers. How have you guys been learning to listen to your body with intuitive eating?

I think for so long, when I had a health and wellness platform myself, it was very focused on, I mean, this was back in 2017, everyone was gluten-free for no reason, like everyone was dairy-free. And I've gotten to, and when I stopped all of that stuff, I just kind of realized that like, eating what you want is really not bad. Like it is truly a blessing to be able to be like,

I'm craving this and I'm gonna honor that. I think it's so interesting be like, I'm craving this and I'm going to honor that. I think it's so interesting, like now I'm just, I'm fully like an intuitive eater. Like if I'm craving something and I eat it, the satisfaction that you get from being fulfilled like that is amazing. Totally. Right? I agree. And I think I've been through so many different stages with my

food. Like for sure. I feel like everyone has. Like if you grew up like in this age, like where moms were doing like slim fast and like juice diets. We did all of that. Yeah, we did all of that. And I guess I had a very unique sort of like childhood experience with food. Like I actually think a great one. Yeah. I grew up in a very European household where like food quality was valued. For sure. And we ate a lot of bread and ham and cheese and like whatever it was.

It wasn't healthy, but it was good quality food. And I didn't think about it that much. Like it wasn't a big thought for me until my weight loss journey. And that's when I taught myself macros and I was obsessed with hitting protein, carb, fat. And when you're counting every day, it gets difficult to not get obsessed. So I definitely went through a period of obsession and fear.

Me too, yeah. And then with my acne. My fitness pal, like, oh my God. I remember putting in those calories and Weight Watchers. Like, that's just so sad. Like, you just want to enjoy, like even if it is a bowl of pasta or toast, like I don't ever, ever limit myself anymore.

And I think I did that for so many years. And now it's like, for what? For what? And I also think there's such a way to do it, like, especially if you get into cooking and doing things at home, there's a way to make anything you want, like, reasonably healthy. Like, we obviously both of us still love nutrition and fueling our bodies. And like, if we are having pasta, maybe it's like super organic pasta. Oh, for sure.

And with like good protein, like, we're not just making crap. Yeah, no. Ever. No. You guys know I'm the biggest fan of Bon Charge, especially their red light face mask for acne scarring. Bon Charge's mission is clear to empower individuals to live a more fulfilling life through science backed and beauty wellness products.

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to save 15%. That's B-O-N-C-H-A-R-G-E.com and use coupon code PURSUIT to save 15%. So we're about to hop into voice messages and I really wanted to do this because Taylor, as I've mentioned a few times, gives me the best advice and I want her to give you guys advice. I mean, she's literally like a life coach in my eyes. Okay, this is from Lauren. Hi, Marianne Taylor. I am approaching my mid-30s and I am finding that my financial goals that my husband

and I are sharing are changing and it is affecting how I interact with my friends. Overall, my friends have been really understanding and supportive of where we're at financially right now and it's made us more creative about finding ways to hang out that fit everyone's financial goals, but I'm curious with friends who are in different financial brackets or have different financial goals than you do, how does that affect your friendship? How do you make sure that you can maintain a friendship that feels balanced and even and supportive and find ways to do things together when you

might have different financial goals or realities. That's a deep question. That's a yeah that's an adult question. That is a really adult question. I'm gonna give that to you. I think honestly like you can totally have friends in different brackets if you want to call it that. I think that being able to just be there for them as a friend, that doesn't cost anything. That's priceless. And also, if you want to do things with couples, obviously going out to eat can get really expensive,

and drinking, and all that kind of stuff. But I think that if you think about fun things that are free, like going to a park or maybe having a little picnic, picking up some charcuterie and just enjoying quality time. I think that felt really financially motivated. I feel like if you emphasize quality time with the people that you love, that's totally free. I agree with you 100%.

Come over to my house, let's sit on the couch. We're all in our 30s. We don't wanna go out and drink anymore. I 100% agree. Unless you do. Yeah, and I feel like... Nothing wrong with that. I think just to be self-aware for a minute,

I'm not someone who really thinks about, and I think that's a luxury that I don't really think about this very often. And I've said this so many times, my family didn't have a lot of money, and I don't really think about this very often. And I've said this so many times, my family didn't have a lot of money and I don't think I ever anticipated having a lot of money. And I hasn't fully caught up with the way that I think. And I've never been someone

that is very financially savvy. Literate, yeah. I'm not a numbers gal. I don't really think about it. And I kind of like that about myself. I like that I give Greg that responsibility. And when we go do things, I feel like we don't talk about it very much. I also think if you have really good communication with your spouse and you're like, can we go

do this? Like, we want to go see this play or we wanna go to this show. Like, is this something that we can do and maybe pull back in other areas? Then that would be such an amazing experience and you would remember that forever, you know? It's also kind of like, I'm relating it to when I was on a fitness journey

and I had very strong goals and other people's were not, my other friends weren't aligning and I was like, okay, see ya. Like sometimes there is a moment where if people aren't down to match where you're at, you need to just take a pause. Take a break, for sure. Yeah, and I think that's okay. And I think if they're still your friends, they're still your friends.

How wonderful. Period. This message is from Nicole. I am wondering how you advocate for yourself in a doctor's office setting. Like, how do you make sure that you are being taken seriously? And how do you make sure that you are getting help? Thanks, Nicole. Okay, I mean, it's a great question.

It is a good question. I feel like I've been to a slew of doctors recently. Yeah, you have. I think it comes with, I feel the same way. Like I'll get into a doctor's office and I'm like, I have no idea what they're talking about. Like they're the professionals, like I'm going to let them do. But sometimes, like before an appointment, I will just start researching.

And honestly, this is crazy, but chat GPT really knows everything. They do. I've been seeing on TikTok these girls saying that they're on chat GPT all day, personal assistant status. Oh, I mean, I've put my blood work into chat GPT and it's like, yeah, you're a good girl.

And it breaks you down. You're a good girly pop. But you can go in and be like, this is what I'm concerned with, and what are the questions I need to ask? I did this literally the other day, and it helps so much with clarity, because I feel like sometimes I get into the doctor's office

and I'm like, I don't know what to do. I'm freaking out. This is so confusing. But I think it's just you coming in, knowing the information, and just being an advocate for yourself and stopping. I mean, I sometimes process things really slow. So sometimes like stopping and be like, can you repeat that again?

Like I need you to like explain that one more time for me. And having confidence in that as well. For sure. Yeah. This is where you're a Capricorn and I'm a Gemini and I'm gonna come in with my Gemini advice right now. I'm gonna be so for real. I like have a really hard time trusting traditional doctors.

Yeah. Even my IVF doctor, even though he's amazing and I know he's doing everything right. I'm always gonna take everything with a grain of salt because of all the conversations I've had on this podcast, because of all the knowledge I've had over the years and just being a holistic bitch. Like I'm not listening to everything you're saying.

Like a traditional doctor is telling me, you can have like one glass of alcohol a day and like just a cup of coffee. And I'm like, well, I'm gonna do it differently. So do what feels good for you. Right, take it with a grain of salt. Like do your outside research, be your own advocate, take your supplements.

I'm seeing this acupuncturist and asking her advice because she is holistic and I'm like, girl, what do you think? Because like, I trust you. And she's a woman too. Like sometimes I just wanna sit with a woman. I know. When it comes to my uterus.

Well, I know it's crazy because your doctor is male. I like, I don't understand that, but to each their own. In Austin, he's it. Yeah. There's only one. Yeah. But yeah, you have to take it with a grain of salt. Take it with a grain of salt and also just question everything, I feel like.

Agree. Michelle. Hey Mari, hey Tay. I hope you're doing good. So I wanted to ask a question regarding adult friendships since I recently made a lot of new like really good friends and sometimes I even feel like I grew closer to them than my OG childhood friends which is a little hard to deal with honestly and to acknowledge that but yeah maybe I don't know

what's your take on adults especially like adult friendships? I feel like it can be very hard, but it's also so enriching if you actually find them. Thank you. I feel like in Mel Robb, I'm in the middle of the Let Them Theory book, and I'm at the part about adult friendships. And one of the things she says about like having really close adult friendships, one of the main things is proximity. Which I feel like, you know, you live in the same city, you do things together,

you're gonna develop deeper relationships with a person. And I feel like that's so okay to be able to be like, I'm closer to these girls now than I probably was to my high school girls. Because if you think about it, a lot of the high school girls are Because if you think about it, a lot of the high school girls are the girls you grew up with. You're not making so many new memories with them.

What you have with them is the past. And I'm sure she's so grateful for it. I'm so grateful for it. But it's hard to make new memories when your proximity is not, you see them maybe once or twice a year. Yeah. Also, like we were saying before, we are going through such like deep hard things right now in our thirties that like the bonds we have are so deep because I mean, you're

seeing me through one of the hardest chapters of my life, essentially, but one of the most transformative and that's kind of irreplaceable. Totally irreplaceable. Like even though we I mean, you're seeing me through one of the hardest chapters of my life, essentially, but one of the most transformative and that's kind of irreplaceable. Totally irreplaceable. Even though we weren't at each other's weddings. Which kind of doesn't mean anything. We'll see each other's kids grow up. Which is crazy.

Yeah. Like that's crazy. And then also I wanted to add, my therapist always says, think of friendships as orbits. You're a planet and think of orbits. Not everyone has to be on the closest orbit to you. For sure. You can have friends who are on the second or third orbit.

For sure. And they're still your friends. Period. Your therapist is amazing. My queen. We love her. We love her. She gives the best advice. I know. I've been seeing her for like six years now.

Yeah, she's great. Denise. Hey, Mari and Taylor! I am so excited to hear this podcast episode in Girl Chat. I'm sure there will be lots of wealth knowledge. And I just wanted to ask, how do you deal with when you set boundaries and do you experience any guilt? And if so, how do you navigate through that?

I would love to hear that and thanks so much and look forward to continue to hear more of the girl chats. Bye guys. Love you. Thanks Denise. Oh my God, boundaries. Yeah. Insane.

Yeah. That's a good question for us. We could do a whole podcast on that. Because we both, I think, naturally struggle with that. For sure. But we've both improved. We we both, I think, naturally struggle with that. For sure. But we've both improved. We have both improved. And even you were saying this yesterday, you were just like, I feel like I always have to text back immediately. It's like, I think recognizing the patterns that

feel like you feel like you are pushing yourself over the boundary are a great place to start. the boundary are a great place to start. Right? Mm-hmm. That's so good. Right. Yeah. We were talking about guilt about texting back, perhaps guilt with ever turning down plans. Yeah. That does come hand in hand with having adult friendships. Yeah. And boundaries are so important. If your friends are going out during the week and you just want to sit at home and make a healthy dinner like choose what you feel like really is going to fuel you for that night. Like, do you have a busy day the next day?

Like maybe stay home and like then see your friends on the weekend. I also think it's okay to say that out loud. Like I feel like I've been practicing saying like, yeah, I've noticed I get like really stressed if I go out on weeknights. So what if we do something Saturday? And if you tell them that, they're like moving forward, oh, note to self, I probably won't

ask Taylor to go out on a weeknight. And that's so fine. Totally. Because like my time during the week is really sacred. One thing I will say about our friend group is that we're pretty honest, I feel like. Yes. I feel like everyone is pretty honest and I feel like being able to voice that over to people and maybe you don't feel comfortable doing that with your friends,

but just like putting it out there for someone to know so important, so important. And it helps them like treat you accordingly. You don't want to be thrown around like as a friend. Period. If you say yes to everything, like I remember like a year ago when like I was so, so, so busy with plans and I said yes to everything, like you kind of just feel like a- Ragdoll. You feel like almost like a ping pong ball, like going back and forth and like you don't have enough time for yourself.

Yeah. And then you start to lose like, you know. 100%. Savannah. Okay. Hi. Number one, I literally love you so much. Number two, how do you all deal with like, you know, being in Austin, you're surrounded

by a bunch of successful, beautiful entrepreneurial women that are like achieving amazing things in life. What is some advice you could give just with like genuinely you know lifting each other up within a friendship instead of like competing or being jealous of one another's achievements like what is some friendship advice you could give in that aspect love you bye these are so good such great questions they're all so different I mean it mean, it's very interesting being in Austin. I feel like I've never had a group of friends

that have been so successful in their own lives. And I mean, like me and my husband, he's in tech and I work in marketing, and it's not like we own a CPG company where so many of our friends do. But I think it's just like being able to just be a really good friend and not compare yourself. Like of course every day everyone has imposter syndrome. You do. I do.

Like we, everyone struggles with it. Yeah. And it's not a weird thing to say. And I think it's just normal part of being in life. And especially at this age. 100%, I think realizing that everyone's a human being. And anyone who presents otherwise is lying. For sure.

You know, like I think we have so many successful, amazing friends and Austin is a city that's so prosperous and everyone's doing cool things. I think just letting down your wall and being vulnerable as a friend has made me realize that even people that I viewed as untouchable are just real fucking people. Yeah. And it doesn't matter how big your house is or how much money you have. Everyone is such a person at the end of the day and you really have the opportunity

to connect with people on that level. I think jealousy is such a dangerous, I mean, we've talked about this, I'm not a very competitive person. I am with myself, but not at all with other people. Not at all. And I don't think you are either. I'm not, I think I'm more competitive with myself, but not at all with other people. Not at all. And I don't think you are either. I'm not, I think I'm more competitive with myself.

Yeah. And of course, like you have those feelings of, you know, insecurity from time to time, but I don't ever project that onto people or onto myself because it's not healthy. I think jealousy is a really toxic trait to have in friendships. Like it really affects relationships.

And I think if you struggle with jealousy, I think that's worth getting therapy for and like trying to figure out and get to the root cause of. And I think if you have someone who's jealous of you, that's a really great like let them moment. And like, I'm gonna take space from that because there's no room for that. And I think taking inspiration is a far better use of your time.

Like totally flip the script. Totally like there's things that like characteristics you have that I would love to have that I'm just inspired by. Same. And that I like take little pieces of I'm like oh my gosh what would Taylor do in the situation or like you know what I mean? Just like, whatever. I think jealousy is, it is, I think if you can recognize that someone's jealous, you have the ability to step back and be like,

you know what, that person is projecting onto me. I'm not doing anything wrong, which you know. Like, that's something that like, we can totally understand. And jealousy is just something that like deep down, someone needs to really, really tap into because it's pure jealous person on the inside, it's showing. Yeah. And don't dull your shine for anyone else. Don't do that. I feel like I've done that a couple times where I feel like I've made people uncomfortable. And I'm like, let me actually make myself smaller to make this person feel better.

I've done that. Or try to fit in a box. Oh my God, the amount of times I've tried to do that. Like crazy. I think we're getting so much better about it. We are. And like, yeah, down the line. Watch out.

Yeah, when we have kids. Five, 10 years, woo, it's over. It's over. We're gonna have no friends left. Okay, Maddie. Hello, five, 10 years, it's over. It's over. We're going to have no friends left. Okay, Maddie. Hello, Maureen Taylor. Here's my situation. My best friend of 11 years is getting engaged to a guy who has treated her pretty poorly.

They broke up and ended up getting back together and both feel that it's very right kind of on a religious standpoint, which is fine but I'm really worried he's gonna go back to his old habits of texting his ex and not showing her off the way she deserves, things like that. So I'm trying to be a supportive best friend but at the same time, I can't

fully be excited for her when she's showing me ring pictures and getting all excited about her engagement. Any advice or tips on this? Thanks. Yeah. This is our first situation entry. Really? Normally, they're just asking like questions. This is the first like situation. So we need to give good advice. I can talk to this.

This is a really good let her situation. I think you can bring it up to her once, talk it out and be like, I don't love how he treats you. This is an example from when he did this, this is this and like, I'm happy for you, but I want you to make this decision. Is this what you want for the rest of your life?" So you would say something? Yes. I would say something if you had the opportunity to.

Okay. I mean, obviously, this is very far down the line. I kind of wish you said this a little bit beforehand. Maybe you have. But I think that having one honest conversation, if there is a moment in time where you feel comfortable doing that, so important. You get it off your chest, you can move forward, and you can let her have the situation because this is something that she's choosing to do. She's choosing this path for her self and is able to like make that decision. Yeah. And I think just emphasizing like, I will support you either way. A thousand percent. I will support you. I'm here for you. This is what I think. Yeah. Like tap into the honesty. Like we have to be honest. Yeah, and you'll be at the wedding regardless. Yeah, and you'll put on a face and you'll be so happy for them and you will make sure that you give the best made of honor speech. But at the end of the day, guess what? It's not your husband.

It's not how your boyfriend or your husband treats you. you know that you wouldn't want that for yourself. And I think I am sometimes too, as someone who tends to get into my friend's relationships, like I wanna understand, I wanna be close to your husband, I wanna know X, Y, and Z, but at this point it's like step back, it's literally not your relationship. So good, so good.

I can say this because F Fi literally came on the show and talked about it. Hey Fi, if you're listening. Whenever Fi was in her previous relationship and I blatantly was just not happy with the way he was treating her and I felt like she could do so much better, I kept my mouth shut for so long.

You did. And I definitely got really resentful of him. And then when finally she opened up to me about how he was treating her, I like took that moment to be like, and I was very careful with how I said it, but I was like, I feel like you could get so much better or you could be treated so much better. I don't think that this is fair to you, but I'm here, whatever you decide. So I kind of did that. Yeah, you did. And yeah, look at her now.

Yeah. Thriving. Thriving. But we wish you luck, Maddie. We do. This is a good one for us. Okay, go. This is from Hayley. Hi Mari, love your podcast, love your content.

You are so extremely inspiring and I just love following you. You are so extremely inspiring and I just love following you. I wanted to get your guys' opinion or just a little bit of advice on how to navigate feeling as though you need to be perfect and feeling as though everyone is analyzing you and judging you. I am planning my wedding currently and I was so stressed and overwhelmed by what people were gonna think or say about decorations or my dress or all that, that I decided to cancel my wedding fully

and we're now eloping and we're going abroad, going to Italy for our wedding, which is so exciting, but I'm still stuck in this spiral of what are people gonna say, what are people gonna think, are they gonna judge my photos, my videos, all that stuff? So what would you say is a really good way to approach this issue and how to just work on this going forward? I don't want to live like this forever, you know?

Oh, yeah, Haley. You don't want to live like that forever for sure. And I think eloping in Italy sounds amazing. It really does. I have a hard time relating because I don't care what people think at all. I don't really think about that stuff. I understand it. I don't really think about it either, but I think everyone kind of has a little bit of that in them.

Yeah, for sure. But it just seems like it might be a little bit stronger for her. I think wedding planning is so stressful. I had such a stressful experience with it. So I think that kind of heightens everything. But I think that, like, just remembering, like, to live in the present and, like, be with your husband and, like, enjoy. If you guys are eloping, like, that gave me goosebumps.

Like, I'm so excited for that. But I think that if you constantly think about what other people are thinking, you're going to spend so much time and stress and burn through all your cortisol and just be like in this constant state of fight or flight and just being so unhappy with where you're at in the present. And I think if you're able to just focus on what's in front of you, you won't think about other people. I also think anyone looking at your photos and judging the way that you did your wedding is sad. Totally sad.

Like, whoever's projecting their negative energy onto your special- Yeah, maybe there's a friend that she's thinking of that like, you know, is kind of triggering something. I guess when I planned my wedding, I really didn't have friends. So perhaps that's why I'm thinking that way. But like anyone trying to take away from your happiness is not happy themselves. Yeah. Thousand percent. Like, you know, she might have a friend that's going through like a bad relationship

or that kind of thing. Yeah. Projecting it onto her. You do you, queen. Yeah. How do we say congratulations in Italian? Compliano! I don't know. No, that was something else. It didn't. That's birthday. You do you, Queen. Yeah. How do we say congratulations in Italian? Complianos! I don't know. No, that was something else. That's birthday. That was birthday.

No, but you did that. Didn't we fact check that word the other day? You were like, why did you make his birthday in Spanish? In Spanish for Greg. Yeah. The last voice message is from Jessa. Hi, Mari. I am such a fan of your podcast.

I listen to you every week and I am rooting for you and Greg to have a little baby. Me and my husband myself have been going through some very hard fertility issues. We've been trying for almost two years and we still have no answers. So listening to you every week brings a smile to my day and I just love hearing all of your hacks for things. I just want to know baby-related questions. What are you going to do and eat when you're pregnant, when you find out you're pregnant? Thanks. Bye. Gosh, what will I do and eat when I'm pregnant? I mean, I have a vision of what I would like to do, but it's difficult to say until you get there.

I think I'll do my, I know at the beginning it's difficult to even get anything down at all. So I think I'll just do my best to get nutrients in, but I feel like protein, nutrients, you know, kind of what I do now, I guess. I think all things are important, but I also think stress too. Stress, and I think also just like

not putting too much expectations on yourself. For sure, take the nap. Take the nap. Yeah. And we don't know, I mean, you know, I think part of this is like just going into it and being down to be flexible, I think is the biggest piece. For sure.

And not trying to over control the situation. Totally. I think this is a good place to conclude. We got some good voice messages. So fun. I can't wait to come back. You crush. No, we need to do a part two. We will do a part two. Because we have so much more to talk about.

We do have a lot more to talk about, maybe on a serious note as well. This was pretty serious. You think so? Yeah. Okay. I feel that we definitely giggled a little but we did adult friendships, we talked like supporting each other.

We did. Finances. I mean, we went all over the place. We did, we did go all over the place. You crushed it. Oh my God, thanks. Thanks, Jay. Thanks for having me here.

I feel so grateful. Love you so much. Love you. Bye, pal. Bye, pal. Bye, pal. Thank you for joining us on the Pursuit of Wellness podcast. To support this show, please rate and review and share with your loved ones. If you want to be reminded of new episodes, click the subscribe button on your preferred

podcast or video player. You can sign up for my newsletter to receive my favourites at marielawellen.com, it will be linked in the show notes. This podcast is a Pursuit Network production, brought to you by Michaela Phillips, Joel Contartese, Davielle Waldner, Jen Lauren and Mackenzie Maisel. You can also watch the full video of each episode on our YouTube channel at Pursuit of Wellness podcast. Love you, Power Girls and Power Boys.

I will see you next time. The content of this show is for educational and informational purposes only. It is not a substitute for individual medical and mental health advice and does not constitute a provider-patient relationship. As always, talk to your doctor or health team.