QAA Podcast - Premium Episode 113: Grand Theft Anon
Episode Date: February 28, 2021Take a break from real life conspiracy theories to explore — with your savvy guide Jake Rockatansky — the finitudes of conspiracy theories inside a videogame: Grand Theft Auto 5. ↓↓↓↓ SUB...SCRIBE TO GET FULL PREMIUM EPISODES EVERY WEEK ↓↓↓↓ www.patreon.com/QAnonAnonymous Merch / Join the Discord Community / Find the Lost Episodes / Etc: http://qanonanonymous.com Episode music by Doom Chakra Tapes (http://doomchakratapes.bandcamp.com), Pontus Berghe, Nick Sena (http://nicksenamusic.com), Pontus Berghe, Hasufel (http://hasufel.bandcamp.com), Owain Hughson
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What's up QAA listeners?
The fun games have begun.
I found a way to connect to the internet.
I'm sorry, boy.
Welcome, listener to Premium Chapter 113 of the Q&N anonymous podcast, the Grand Theft Anon
Anon episode.
As always, we are your host, Jake Rockatansky, Julian Fields, and Travis View.
This week, with his brain far too fragile to continue.
discussing conspiracy theories in the real world, Jake has opted for a lighter topic.
Discussing conspiracy theories in the Grand Theft Auto world,
a more, shall we say, dissociated version of our present unfortunate reality.
So, I've been instructed to say that you should join him as his palms get sweaty
and his controller batteries run low, down the slippery slope into the frighteningly familiar
message board community hell-bent at uncovering the untold secrets inside Grand Theft Auto.
Five, which is a video game.
Jake just assumes you know that, but it's a video game.
I feel like most people know that.
No.
The Grand Theft Auto is a...
If there's like one video game that people know, it's that one.
A lot of the people who listen this, they are amazed at, like, ice trays.
Like, how does it work?
Grand Theft Anon.
Just north of the seedy city of Los Santos, California, where serial murderers are actually the good guys.
Since a stretch of vast countryside, rolling hills.
and dusty dirt paths all converge on one place, the magnificent Mount Chilliad.
Now, rumor has it that if you're able to catch one of the last cable cars up to its windy peak,
you'll be met with a large cryptic mural painted on one of the walls.
The mural appears to be a cross-section of the mountain itself,
with jagged lines breaking and converging all the way up to the top of the peak,
where a depiction of a large eye presides over it all.
And so began one of the most infamous bakes in all of gaming history.
Grand Theft Auto 5, as some of you may know, is the second highest grossing video game of all time, second only to Minecraft, and Rockstar North, the developers, posted that just last month the 7-year-old game broke sales records again.
GTA 5 has grossed more than any movie, and according to IGN, was the United States' top grossing title of the last decade.
Strange, because this game is essentially a metropolitan city living simulator with two exceptions.
Doing crime is strongly encouraged, essential even, and you're able to murder as many people as you want.
I remember the first time I played a GTA game.
I believe it was Grand Theft Auto 2, an overhead Rampage Royale, where all you could do was steal cars and murder people.
There were missions, I'm sure, but none that I ever saw.
There huddled in my neighbor's upstairs bedroom, straining to see a computer screen no bigger than your standard iPad,
My pupils grew black as I partook in the carnage.
But back in those days, you still felt somewhat removed.
It felt much different decades later when I was doing the exact same thing
in first person with realistic blood physics in 4K resolution.
It felt way awesomer.
Conspiracy in Los Santos.
It may come as no surprise then that as Grand Theft Auto inches closer and closer to reality,
the brainworms from this dimension would slowly burrow their way into its matrix,
Matrix, spawning a new generation of bakers, ones who had grown tired of shooting up nightclubs
or trying to recreate the motorcycle jump from true lies. In fact, Grand Theft Auto 5 specifically
is stuffed to the brim with conspiracies involving alleged Easter eggs, tie-ins to other
rock star titles such as bully and Red Dead Redemption, and even meta-narratives as to what
the three main characters represent. As we take a look closer, it appears that the developers
encourage and even feed this conspiratorial mindset down to the radio-scent.
stations in the game. Here's a short clip from the Blaine County radio station, and even in
2013, it sounds eerily familiar. These are some serious Illuminati, along with lots of other
people. And who gives a rat's ass about the space station? What are they doing up there? Growing
genetically modified wheatgrass in space and having taxpayer-funded zero-g swinger parties? All
paid for by borrowing money from mega-banks? The mega-bank occupation is here. There's a
Bank and a drugstore on every corner so you can get indebted for life by borrowing money.
Walk next door and you buy drugs to numb your pain.
That's the country we've let them create.
Hey, uh, thanks for all that you do for the war on our minds, Ron.
I love your show.
We got to fight this conservative plot to return America to a pre-industrial state
in which a few corporations own everything.
Seriously, I mean, thanks to Big Pharma, all my children.
are crippled from vaccines.
And what's weird is that they sort of jumble, like, conflicting ideologies,
pairing the very real concern of corporate monopolies alongside anti-vax truthers.
In another clip, however, the ranting host seems to be referencing adrenachrome.
I am working on drone jamming technology.
You ain't spying on me.
I mean, this is a dark place run by aliens looking to suck the blood out of your veins,
enabled by do-gooders who are looking to steal the guns.
from your home and trust me
it's all part of a Judeo-Christian
Muslim plot to make their religions seem
overly important so people don't ask the
real questions about what it all means
I've said it before and I will
say it again. Open
your ears
and if you want an open your ear t-shirt
then send me a text
next message left on the line
was from this guy
Hey
I really like watching people die
Thanks for calling
I tell you what
I tell you what
People say I'm nervous and paranoid
But I'm not
I'm not dear listeners
Because I'm not nervous
I'm fearful
And I'm not paranoid
Because this stuff is true
There is a whole secret world
That is kept hidden from us
That makes everything makes sense
And I understand it
More or less
And it's my mission
To help you understand it too
Yeah okay
So, yeah.
They're still hedging their bets where they're like,
Judeo-Christian, Muslim.
Yeah, I've never once heard of an interfaith plot.
It's usually Jews or Catholic or Muslims,
but like a Judeo-Christian Muslim plot, that's a new one to me.
This is very Ubisoft.
Oh, we'll take the politics out of games.
Takes things that are inherently political on both sides of them.
Yeah.
We did it.
I mean, even so, with a couple changes here and there,
I mean, this stuff is nearly word for word,
what many QAnon supporters today actually believe. In absence of new single-player content
since the game's released, those bored with the online mode or finding it too toxic have
poured themselves into uncovering the game's many secrets, which, unsurprisingly, has
birthed successful content creators with millions of views.
This is crazy. Alright, so let's just carry this on. I might play a few of these clips
as well just to show you guys that the Ratsman does definitely exist. This clip actually came from a
video in November of 2016 which I did or roll it now guys if you guys have seen the
information going around the community this stuff we're going to put on the screen
right now this information comes directly from the game files and what is pretty
significant about this information is that if we take a little closer look you will
come across an audio file which is titled sewer gator and if you guys don't know what a
is, you can Google it, it is simply an alligator or some form of monster if you look into in-depth definitions.
And this is basically telling us there is an audio clip of a sewer monster which Rockstar Games created in GTA 5.
Why would they create a sewer monster audio clip?
without a sewer monster. It makes no sense. So this means 100% there's a sewer monster in GTA-5. No doubt about it, somewhere in these sewers.
Of course, the influencer here called Not, who has over 4.6 million subscribers on YouTube,
is talking about the infamous Ratman, which of course began as a blurry JPEG.
Allegedly, the creature's first appearance came in 2008's Grand Theft Auto 4 in a video posted in 2010 with over
over 200,000 views.
A user by the name of Rockstar Games' myths
post the story of Ratman.
I have to be honest, it's just music
with low-res text plastered on top of it.
I will do my best to read it.
Ratman is an unproven rat-like creature
said to exist in GTA4.
This is a very debated myth
since most people cannot find him.
He is said to live underground in the subway
near the abandoned subway station in Chinatown.
A bio or fungus-like substance.
Orange blood can be found along fire.
Supposedly dead bodies can be found down there from time to time.
However, players have most likely killed someone down there and then took a photo or started recording,
implying that the person was dead before they got there.
He is said to have red eyes, sharp claws.
claws, sharp
teeth. If you put
dice together, you might get
something like this.
So doing episodes with Jake
is like an obstacle course where
he'll think up a new way to make
production difficult, like a video
that's playing a copyrighted music
over text that goes by too fast
that claims...
What music? Is it the Halloween theme?
By John Carpenter himself.
Hmm.
I should have known.
I thought that the video had a little bit higher production value than I, you know,
then I sort of initially suspected.
Travis G.
You has his face firmly planted in his hands.
What, you guys, do you guys thought that this wasn't going to be completely melted?
What did I say?
This is beautiful.
I'm enjoying the experience.
No.
Travis is having some issues.
You're expanding the genre of a QAA episode, you know.
You're thinking a new dimension.
That's what I do.
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Thank you.
Thanks.
I love you.
Jake loves you.
I'm going to be able to be.