Quick Question with Soren and Daniel - A Portamento of Prepared & Petty

Episode Date: April 23, 2024

Soren and Daniel talk about a strange thing from the WGA awards, try to invent a word to describe the very particular feeling of almost being a hero, and realize Soren will eventually have to have an opinion on how Daniel's wedding went.Whether you need help inventing a word or you just want to say hi, we'd love to hear from you. You can find us, follow us, or email us:[e-mail]@QQSorenandDan on Instagram@QQPodcast on TikTokYou can support the podcast and get a couple of bonus episodes a month on Patreon. Head over to hear the guys design friend dates for one another at https://www.patreon.com/quickquestion.Thanks to Rocket Money for sponsoring the pod. Go to RocketMoney.com/qq -it could save you hundreds a year.Thanks Raycon for sponsoring this pod. Go to buyraycon.com/qq for 20% off plus free shipping.

I've got a quick, quick question for you, alright? I wanna hear your thoughts, I wanna know what's on your mind I've got a quick, quick question for you, alright? The answer's not important, I'm just glad that we could talk tonight So what's your favorite? Who did you get? When do I be remembered? What's it up with? Where did all the movies go? Oh, forget it I saw a movie, Daniel O'Brien

Two best friends and comedy writers If there's an answer, they're gonna find it I think you'll have a great time here I think you'll have a great time here So, hello again and welcome to another episode of Quick Question with Soren and Daniel, the podcast where two best friends and comedy writers ask each other questions and give each other answers. I am one half of that podcast, senior writer for Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, author of How to Fight Presidents with Daniel o'brien and four-time writers guild of award of america recipient daniel o'brien joined as always by my co-host mr soren bowie soren say hello hey everybody i'm soren bowie i'm a writer for

american dad i recently did a little sleuthing on the internet daniel had told me uh an anecdote about being at the wga awards and i was like, where are those this year? Same place everywhere. Beverly Hotel, which is in my town, which means that Daniel never said hello. Thanks to Rocket Money for supporting our podcast. Rocket Money will quickly and easily identify your subscriptions for you so you can stop paying for the ones you don't want. Stop throwing your money away. Cancel unwanted subscriptions and manage your expenses the easy way by going to rocketmoney.com slash QQ.

Thanks to Raycon for supporting Quick Question. Their audio quality rivals all the big audio brands you know and love at a price you'll love even more. Go to buyraycon.com slash QQ today to get 20% off your Raycon order plus free shipping. Well, here's the thing, Soren. Here's the insider scoop is this ceremony takes place simultaneously in Los Angeles and New York. So I was at the Edison Ballroom in New York for the ceremony. And we are there in the room when like they read the names and they they they uh announced the winners and then we all if you're if you're if you won you get up and you give a speech and it's very exciting but the i guess they also announce who wins in la for the people who are at that ceremony and they even announce categories where there's not a lot of the people who are at that ceremony. And they even announced categories where there's not

a lot of the people there. And the West Coast gets it a little bit before we hear it announced live in real time. So the presenter is up there saying all of the names in our category for Comedy Talk Variety Series. And we're all sitting there like butterflies and stomachs and then we get a text from mark one of our west coast co-workers who goes whoa fuck yeah congrats and we're all just like looking at each other like did you see that do we got okay now let's wait for them up on stage to say it so there's like wild a full 15 seconds where we all know what happened before the presenter even says the winner it's a strange phenomenon yeah and you're not connected to a feed or anything like that right these are just two separate events that are happening at the same time they're two separate

events and i believe the winners are announced on like the WGA social media as soon as they are revealed yeah so like when Mark on the west coast gets it 15 seconds before we do Twitter gets it as well and and wherever else you follow along so it's like a buzz from our co-worker I got a text from my dad who read about it on deadline and we got a slack notification from our boss who was not at the ceremony so we all it was spoiled like it's it's in a good way it's still good yeah uh i mean terrible for everybody else in the category yeah obviously for i mean the reigning champs just keep winning but um okay the events have to be happening simultaneously to not spoil the winners any more than like 15 seconds so do you not have entertainment during it is there not like somebody who's like

at the uh you don't have your chris rock who's there like doing like jokes in between the awards we have uh our host josh gondelman friend of the show who does like an opening monologue and does a couple of bits throughout the night but really there's no it's not like going to um this will be accessible it's not like going to the emmys when you go to the emmys because it's streamed live broadcast on tv there are the commercial breaks that you at home have to sit through we also have to sit through that period of time and there's no entertainment so they just say we're going to commercial now and then we all just sit quietly and wait for the show to come back the writers guild because they're not televised there are no commercials

it's just a ceremony that you know moves at a steady pace it's just a very long ceremony so there's sometimes you get entertainment but it's just in the form of like, oh, it just so happens that Alana Glazer is presenting the next award and she has got a few minutes of fun stuff that she's going to do. But that's... But while she's doing her fun stuff, someone on the West Coast is like,

last week tonight, John Oliver. Well, we're still getting banter on our side of the country. Yeah, I mean, it seems like also with speeches and everything, it seems impossible to keep those two things running concordantly like to keep them coincided so that means it feels like there will be times where you're just like uh we're getting yeah we're getting word that uh west coast hasn't caught up to us yet so we're gonna just yeah bam we're gonna chill for a little bit and we're just gonna wait thank you for your

patience let's do oh we should do a moment of silence for who's died who's died have any writers died in the last year no one wrote it down we don't know we don't we don't track that sort of thing fair we think that the guy who writes that stuff down might have died yeah so we're just gonna celebrate him either that or he's fired we don't know which uh okay well let's get right into the show uh hold on first of all congratulations okay big congratulations daniel i'm so happy for you you won again your show just stacks up the awards and i I got to say, it's due. Like, you guys are a good show.

You're a really good show. You deserve your accolades. And I know you never feel that way and you think accolades are silly, but you do. You deserve it. And I'm happy for you. Thank you. Everyone deserves awards. As long as we're going to give awards to adults, give them to all the adults.

No, no, no. Because then the award doesn't mean anything anymore you give it to the people um okay we'll never this is an impasse let's go on with the show yeah soren i need your help okay i need your help coming up with a new word again okay last time i needed your help coming up with a new word again. Okay. Last time I needed your help coming up with a new word. I don't think we ever landed on anything. Horny? Was it horny and hungry? I can't remember.

It definitely wasn't horny and hungry. Yeah, I can't remember. You were like, so full that you're mad? So full that you're mad, yeah. Okay. I think bustrated was on there. That's why you're getting confused with horniness is because of busting. Busting makes me feel good.

You want to bust, but you're mad about it. Yeah. So this is a phenomenon that I bet you are familiar with, with which I bet you are familiar. that sensation when you are prepared for something and you are just about to step up to the plate and demonstrate your quiet preparedness in an emergency. And then the moment passes and it's no longer needed. Here's where this came from. Our power went out last week and a quick glance out the window saw that it was out for like as far as the eye could see where we are. Everyone's power was out and unlike the earthquake situation where I froze and thought earthquake for several seconds, I immediately, I get up, I go to one flashlight I have that is going to light this way. And then I go directly to where I know my two headlamps are, and I'm going to pull them

down and I'm going to give my fiance and myself each get a headlamp. And then I'm going to retrieve the other candles and lanterns that are going to light our way. And I was like, this is, I was so pumped to be Johnny on the spot, to be so prepared. And because this isn't a thing that I can like, I don't let Shay know when she moves in. It's like, hey, by the way, this is here where all of my cool emergency secrets are. Because I'm waiting for a moment like this. And then it comes. I like i'm gonna be such a fucking stud doing this and by the time i go from my headlamps back into the living room the power goes back on and i and i just don't get my moment of preparedness to shine in the sun

and i you have nowhere to put it was feeling a thing and i didn't have a word for it so now it's your problem yeah i mean like what ultimately you want is this familiar to you by the way yeah of course yeah there are there are moments even in a room like when i say a room you i mean like a writer's room like where you are the conversation leads to a point where you have some really valuable, cool information. And you're like, oh, oh, boy, this is gonna be great. This is gonna be great. And then people keep talking. And then the conversation takes a quick turn and it goes a different direction.

And you're like, you're still waiting at that stop. And you're like, maybe they'll come back for me. And you have an option then you have the option of being like i'm just gonna bulldoze and say it anyway or letting it go and like and just like eating that and just being like okay i didn't get it and maybe someday it'll be back um i've felt like camping and backpacking trips. Like the first time I went backpacking with my former college roommate. And just knowing I had a very large knife and into the hilt of which there was a compass

and also the compass unscrews and there was like water purification pills and like a long line of rope. And it was like, this is going to be, when we need this and we will need it it's gonna be so there's no fucking way jared my old roommate has this stuff we're gonna be fighting bears and we're gonna be lost and i'm gonna have all of that stuff that we need in one knife and it's gonna be so cool and then the trip goes off without a hitch and it's totally uneventful and just like well i

can't in the parking lot of yosemite i can't be like hey by the way i've been packing this giant machete this whole time we didn't need it but i i needed you to know that i was ready for this it was digging into my hip the whole time i think i blistered it it was nice that i brought it's like up the whole time i think i blistered it it was nice that i brought it's like it's a preparedness with uh some pettiness to it and like some some searching of like i want uh some kind of attaboy for the work that I could have done if I needed to. I think what I'm circling is low self-esteem, I think. No, you want to be rewarded for doing a good job. I get it. I totally get it.

We had to have earthquake preparedness kits here. And there's a lot of work that goes into making one of those, like putting it together and deciding what goes in it. And then I also made them for my children as well. Like a completely different thing because they need different stuff. And had it all ready, got them in our house. Then I also put two in our cars. And like you're buying brand new stuff for those like you're buying new utility knives and things like that uh and crowbars and like things that i don't

ordinarily own and now i have these toys that i just can't play with like they're just sitting in these cars and like and so i i get done i'm just like oh come on it would be really great to get an earthquake like right now. That would be very helpful. Right. Because best case scenario, you never have to use your bug out bag, your earthquake kit, your camping knife compass combo, your headlamps for when the power goes out. Best case scenario, you never have to use any of your emergency things.

Second best case scenario, you do. things second best case scenario you do and it's cool when you do it has to also save the day because like you guys it can't be too big an emergency it can't be like so big that you're like okay this is like a little stop gap like this is i'm putting my finger in the dam but like we're we're all toast here in like 48 hours right it's only it's for me it was kind of blown even worse because i went and retrieved the headlamps and then the power went on and so she could see that i had them and she was like that's that's great and i was like yeah but it would have been now you won't be surprised if we do need them in the future now if the power goes out'll be like, where are the headlamps?

And now it's just a thing that I'm expected to have, not a surprise thing. It's not the expectation. Yeah. It's got to be... There's got to be like some portmanteau of preparedness blue balls. Yeah. I didn't want to take it to blue balls, but that is what I've been thinking.

All right. Well, I understand you don't want it. You don't want to go blue. Right. Right. Absolutely. I,

I, what I could do is I could just sit here in silence for the next 10 minutes and come up with a really great one. Do you want to do that? Yeah, I think that would be good. I could just sit here in silence for the next 10 minutes and come up with a really great one. Do you want to do that? Yeah, I think that would be good. Burn 10 minutes of the podcast. So if anyone's skipping around, there's just like this moment of silence and all of a sudden this word that's

like press appointment. They're like, yeah, that's it. Um, okay. No, I know that feeling bad.

I know that we might not settle this. Yeah. Yeah. um okay no i know that feeling bet i know that we might not settle this yeah yeah two things everyone knows about me is that i recently merged households and i'm saving for a wedding that means an inevitable third thing has to be true we are trying to save money by condensing and getting rid of our unwanted subscriptions. And there were a lot of them. When you combine two houses, and even if you don't, you find there are a ton of unwanted subscriptions lying around. Rocket Money helps you cancel a subscription. Did you know nearly 75% of people have subscriptions they've forgotten about? Before I started using Rocket Money,

I thought I had about two subscriptions. I could not believe it when they showed me I was paying for 18 subscriptions each month. Between streaming services, fitness apps, and delivery services, it's never ending. Thanks to Rocket Money, I'm no longer wasting my money on the ones that I forgot about. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. I can see all of my subscriptions in one place, and if I see something I don't want, I can cancel it with a few taps. Rocket Money will even try to negotiate and lower your bills for you by up to 20%. All you have to do is submit a picture of your bill, and Rocket Money takes care of the rest.

They'll deal with customer service for you. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total of $500 million in canceled subscription-saving members up to $740 a year when using all of the app's features. That's a lot of wedding money! Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash qq. That's rocketmoney.com slash qq. rocketmoney.com slash qq. q rocket money dot com slash qq daniel how maybe i shouldn't even bring this up and get in the off chance that we are going to

get a separate podcast or we just talk about weddings the rest of our lives but how is wedding planning going it's it's going well it's it's uh it's it's stressful. I mean, both things can be true. There's, there's so much stuff that's timed because we're, we're on a very abbreviated schedule. We just wanted to get married sooner rather than later. And there are a lot of things that we need to like take off and, and book before they're completely booked up. So there's like the stressful side of things and uh you don't want that to feel super rushed and we're not making it feel rushed uh but the thing so much of uh your your vendors who you're choosing as your department heads for a wedding so much of that is based on for lack of a better word vibes i mean

you're looking at the work of your videographer your photographer and your your your bands your coordinators whomever you're you're you're working with you have like some loose resumes and previous work to go over but at the end of the day these are people that you're that are going to be at your wedding and like people that we're going to be in communication with for the next however many months until the wedding. So you still want it to be someone that you can get along with and you're going to like and it's going to feel like a good fit and you're going to want them around. And you think like, yes, this photographer gets what we're all about. This videographer understands they're going to weave in and out and capture the right moments. They're going to want them around and you think like yes this photographer uh gets what we're all about this videographer understands they're gonna weave in and out and capture the right moments they're gonna have good instincts and there's really no way that i have found to

land on who is a good vibe fit for your wedding that isn't a conversation either in person or we've been doing a lot of zoom conversations with people and it's just a lot of sitting in front of a computer and like we tell our story the person tells their story and we like chat and we vibe and like and and again see if it's if it's a good energy if it's this person would be a good hang and there's uh there's a lot of joy and excitement to that there's also there's no shortcut they're like every conversation is a conversation about your story and also everyone it's there's no vendor because weddings are a huge fucking racket there's no vendor that's gonna be like look i'm just the photographer really

you want to spend your money on on the music and the food i just take pictures who cares every single person because every vendor got the same memo that no one says the word expense anymore they all say investment every one of them is like don't think about photography as uh an expense think of it as an investment what are you gonna have for the future you're gonna have these pictures you're gonna have them forever you're gonna have these videos this is an investment and i believe all of them and i'm like absolutely totally no you're right and then we take over to a phone call with the florist who was like flowers live forever and we're like oh fuck i can't one of you has to be can't one of you just

be like bullshit can't one of you be like i'm the guy who does chairs yeah chairs are nonsense so they're gonna be cheap no everything is uh everyone is everyone got the same memo that when you're selling something to a potential bride and groom, it is all about the story that you're selling them and like the experience that you're, you're bringing because they know like, we are excited and we will be sold on like really passionate people telling great stories. Even if those at the end of the day, it still like all right and then you write a very large check to a person who is going to do a thing that your friends can do for free yeah it yes it's like it's endlessly frustrating how how overcharged you get for every single piece of a wedding every single piece where you're like

even like you're like i want to rent umbrellas like umbrellas are going to be hanging from the ceiling and it's going to be really cool and they're like all right cool um wait a second is this for a wedding you're like yeah oh you want wedding umbrellas okay yeah okay yeah we've got those uh they're a little bit more expensive but it's an investment um yeah it is still good though like like i i i i the reason i don't want to talk about the wedding planning too much that i don't They're a little bit more expensive, but it's an investment. Yeah. It is still good, though. The reason I don't want to talk about the wedding planning too much is that I don't want it to be so repetitive of just like zeroing in on the cost. Because at the end of the day, this is what we want to do and we've chosen to do. And we like these conversations with the vendors that we're going to be working with.

It is, it's, it's, it's just a lot. And it does start to feel like they all, they're all working from the same playbook of how to talk to us. And I don't think any vendor is trying to scam us i absolutely not i think they're all doing good work but i just think that they the wedding industrial complex at this point just has its set ways of doing things and it's like financial floor of what they are allowed to ask for for their services and have you are you to the high yet in the creation of this wedding that you have felt how easy it is to become a and like this is a very loaded term but like a bridezilla like you

yourself like a whatever your version of it is like the the fact that it is going to cost so much money at every single turn and every single turn it's the fact that it is going to cost so much money at every single turn and every single turn it's everybody telling you this is going to be such an important day for you of course you'd want to get it exactly right you'd want it to be exactly the way you want it and because it's stressful and it's terrifying and you're like you're spending so much money and it's everyone's telling you it has to be perfect so like the fact that you would on the day be like these are not the fucking chairs i wanted like these are the wrong chairs like you could see how that happens so easily i don't believe i've become groomzilla yet but i understand

how a person could turn into groomzilla or bridezilla because one of the things that i've learned about about planning a wedding which which if if you haven't planned a wedding you simply gotta it's too much fun a thing that i've i've learned about it is uh it's it's similar to directing sketches and and and movies i assume where it's very important for you to have strong opinions on many things that you didn't previously have strong opinions about. When you're directing, you need to have like, oh, this is what I think a set should look like, and this is what I think costumes should look like. There's less room for directors to be like, I don't know, what do you think? You know, you have your department heads, you need to give them your vision and then let them go and do

their art with it. Very similar to planning a wedding from my limited experience so far, where you need to have firm answers on things that you previously didn't care about, like table settings and like color palettes for the wedding and what kind of suit you want to wear, what kind of suit you want other people to wear, flowers, the size of a band, these things that you never gave thought to, you suddenly need to have answers on. And I like that. I like being firm and having opinions. But what happens in this process is those opinions that you formed because you needed to give an answer, they become how you actually feel. So it wasn't just like a throw-off thing. It suddenly becomes like a thing that is important to you in real life and weddings because you're you're it's it's the the joint vision of two people augmented with the help of a variety of artistic vendors and uh creative people with their own

agendas and price points you inevitably compromise on things in in the best ways generally and i'm a i can be pretty flexible i think on compromising things but how i think groomzillas are forged is one of the things will become very important to you one or two or three of the things it's never going to be like i don't think very important to you. One or two or three of the things. It's never going to be like, I don't think Gride or Broomzilla's are, this wedding was supposed to be perfect, and it's not 100% perfect. I think what happens is I'm going to find one thing, and I don't know what it is yet, but I'm going to find the thing that just becomes the most important thing in the wedding to me some like very small superficial thing and it's because the wedding industrial complex has trained me to feel very passionately about

all of these things and i'll budge on some things but it's it's going to be one or two things it's going to be something like it's like oh yeah this this aspect isn't perfect it's never gonna be perfect 100 of the time the food wasn't exactly xyz the this the blah blah blah blah the flat whatever it's gonna be it's it's it's they're all fine and then there's gonna be like one really surprising tiny thing where it's like the band didn't learn this song like they didn't learn the fucking monster mash or whatever whatever the thing is gonna be be like suddenly one thing is going to become the most important thing to me and i i hope for all of our sake that they whatever vendor is in charge of that does it right because this is like i i can see how a person can really stew and and fixate on something you know they'll focus on like here's where

i compromised on this thing here's where i compromised on that thing the one thing that i insisted on was everyone goes home with a pocket full of pasta and then lo and behold the pasta guy called out and then i then something in my brain snaps and the wedding is ruined for me yes but i'm not there yet and i don't know what the thing is yet because you guys and i'm sure you've already started a little bit um but like the the delegation of tasks within a wedding between the two of you because it's not you know we're not preparing for your one-man show like it's it's now both of us like now there's like two people and you're the other person is reliant on you as well. So it ends up being the thing that you were responsible for that you took great pride in and then goes wrong.

Because not only is that disappointing to you, but you're deeply embarrassed to your significant other because you have ruined it for them. And so like for me, it was DJ. Like we were like, we spent a lot of time thinking like, okay, it's a small town. Can we do live music? We're not really into the bands that we could get. Like, let's just do a dj i took care of it like i found a local guy like got a dj and then like put together like music put together music to be like you're just gonna fucking play it but like here are like 400 songs that i think would be good right a lot of songs that could have been played

and we got most i would say 70 of what we heard was songs that he picked and when we came out said colleen's name wrong and so like that was the thing where i was like fuck i fucked this up especially when you look around and you look at the things that were her responsibility and it's like nope flowers look great food's great fuck the table settings you were right the mason jars wildflowers was the way to go um yeah and like the photographer like everything that she did was pinpoint and that's always gonna be the case with my wife because my wife is she went to school for her planning um she is great at it she's great at planning big events and she's good at like forward thinking and i am not and so like i when i get it

wrong i'm like oh i'm i'm just a child i think the important takeaway to remember is that your wedding was great and everyone loved it and i don't think your your dj doesn't stand out as bad to me or anything like that i maybe at some point knew that he got your wife's name wrong yeah maybe on the on the day i might have known that but i it's not ringing a bell no that's good that's good that's good news yeah's good. That's good news. Yeah. Hey, it's almost Mother's Day, and I know what you're thinking. I don't really get my mom anything on Mother's Day. I just give her a card, maybe. Maybe flowers.

Nothing bigger than that, because you don't want to set a precedent. I'm telling you, you've got to get your mom a pair of Raycon earbuds. They're something that she will love. If your mom is like my mom, she gets home from having driven into town, back up to her log cabin, and then she just sits in her car and listens to the radio because she doesn't want to end what she's already listening to. And she doesn't realize that she can listen to that in the house with her Raycon earbuds if she just had some. Think of all the things your mom could still be doing every single day and she could get done if she didn't have to just sit in the car outside of your long cabin in the woods for 20 minutes a day. Is no one else having this problem?

Am I going crazy? Honestly, though, they make a great Mother's Day gift. Get 20% off your Raycon order and free shipping at buyraycon.com slash QQ. Raycon's everyday earbuds are the perfect way to tune out all the noise around you and tune in to something great. And Raycon offers 30-day returns. I use my Raycons pretty much every day. If I'm running to the gym, I'm wearing my Raycons because I know that they're going to stay in my ear better than any other earbud. So go to buyraycon.com slash qq today to get 20 off your raycon order plus free shipping that's right you'll get 20 off and free shipping at buyraycon.com slash qq

daniel i'm going to let me like prepare right now okay regardless of how your wedding goes you know what i'm going to say to you about your wedding. Right? Yeah. You're going to say it was great. Best wedding you've ever been to. That's exactly right. That's because that's what you always say to people.

Absolutely. Is that what you want from me? um i would i would uh push you to include at least one specific and like an undeniable specific because you can say the wedding was perfect uh because that's what you say to people at weddings but i think to really if you really want to sell a product i think you have to say when this person said this thing in this speech or ideally something that that i said or did or that she said or did something that was that you can pull out that like shows you were really uh paying attention then i'll be like oh he's telling the truth anyone could say it's perfect wedding but he said it was a perfect wedding and the calamari was good now that's true so that

means he can't you know if the calamari thing is true then the perfect wedding thing must also be true that's how i know this is legit well yeah i mean i'm not i would give you specificity um this isn't my first rodeo but yeah i've been to weddings and i've been to weddings where i was like fuck man yeah we all have that was tough and i think you i didn't know if you wanted me to have license like at the end if i was if i had gone to this wedding and the calamari calamari was all pig bong and like it was just downhill from there if you'd want me to be like dude let's do it again no i want you to do the the the sweet guy thing and say that everything was great everything was perfect and really moving and uh let's go here's here's where i don't

envy you and this is so exciting to me you're gonna go to my wedding and then sometime pretty shortly after that we're gonna do a podcast about it not about it but like the people are gonna want to know they're gonna know the wedding is happening this fall and i i have never been to a wedding and then did a podcast about it knowing that the person whose wedding it was would then have the option to go over the footage of what i said in the podcast and like right really tell if i was lying or if i was blowing smoke or whatever and now you have that like if you don't like the wedding you have the biggest acting challenge of your fucking life ahead of you because you're gonna have to lie to me in this podcast and i'm gonna have to believe you and all the sworn swords of soren in the comments they're gonna have to believe you do these whichever my fans are called they're gonna

have to believe you and i don't normally are called they're gonna have to believe you and i don't normally read the comments or or or engage with our fans but i'm gonna mobilize them for this episode be like everyone look for get up get i know one of our listeners has got to be uh an fbi body language expert get him or her in there to look at soren and see see if they get spot tells if he is like blinking too much or if he's sweating while he's talking about the calamari oh this is gonna be great we're gonna do a podcast about it and then i'm gonna analyze the podcast and then we're gonna do a podcast about that yeah you suddenly have a bone to pick like it's a completely amicable podcast where we're like it was the

best wedding it was so good it was like i love this aspect and i love your color choices your palette like everything and then at the end of it we come back and you're like all right listen motherfucker yeah i got a bone to pick with you now soren every time you say uh you said the music was great and you looked straight at the camera and you said the food was great but then when you said the color palette was great you your eyes went up and to the left. And you did that a few times. And I brought in an expert here who says that's your tell that you're lying. So what the fuck, man? Try again.

I am very excited. Are you guys, I mean, I don't know how much you want to divulge, but are you doing fall colors for it? No. Okay. I think that's good because you are like, if you were in the mountains or something like that, or like the tip of Maine, I would be like, oh no, you got to go with like a rust. But where you are, I think it does not matter. I think that's going to be, oh, it's going to be so much fucking fun.

I can't wait i i was lamenting and maybe i did on the podcast i was lamenting how like i'm too old for weddings like the weddings all dried up for a while it was that's all my money was being spent on weddings like going to weddings and i was fine with that i love going to a wedding um but then they started drying up and everyone was like hey man you'll get the next one like next time around like all those friends will start getting divorced and then you can go to those the next weddings yeah i'm like no i've got good friends like they're good people and they're gonna stay married they're not shitheads there's a uh shout out to all our divorced people i'm sorry it didn't work out you're not a shithead you're a good person why are you a shithead i'm sure of it um but you're absolutely right there's a period in your 20s where it just feels like there's like

a three or four year wedding season where it's all happening and uh for me i was like because i had friends in la and new jersey who were getting married there was like a lot of traveling bouncing around it almost gets overwhelming. And like, I have a coworker who's quite a bit younger than I am, and she has seven weddings this year. And I was like, man, I don't, that's what it's like to be in your mid twenties. And I do not miss that. But the fun thing is, because we, to your point, we were talking to one of our potential

vendors today, and they were trying to get a sense of what this wedding is going to be. And I was like, well, we have a nice advantage because we're a little bit older, and a lot of our guests have been our friends for life. And they haven't had, we don't have as many weddings as we used to have because that's just a type of party that dries up after a certain point under ideal circumstances so we've got a group of people who know this is this is their last big party for a while and they're so hyped and they're so excited about it and it's just we've got a lot of people who are going to be leaving their kids at home for a night out or a weekend out whatever they they want it to be and they are just like pumped pumped to have this kind of thing that you you might have gotten tired of by your fourth wedding in two years but now it's like oh yeah it's fucking yeah this again you know everyone likes one roller coaster every once in a while well you felt the door was shut i mean

like that you thought that door on that part of your life and you're like oh well i mean it was nice well it lasted and then all of a sudden you just get in this time machine like you get to turn it back and you get to go try it relive it one more time and like i think people are gonna go fucking ham at your wedding i think so too i think it's gonna be a fun time it's gonna be so great i think i i don't remember if it said on the notation are kids allowed no okay all right fuck off kids which is which is a tough call and i think everybody planning a wedding will say the same thing where where you you we like all the kids in our extended lives uh but there's you do kind of want the

parents to have like a night out a night off a night to to party and get and get silly and it's also again like not to not to to make everything a cost thing but weddings will charge you for everything yeah yes including children yeah and they don't even eat as much but they charge us a regular head that's right you can't you can't say like hey don't worry we're i'm bringing a sandwich from from home for this one kid and they're like we don't care yeah that we're charging that kid not only for the steak but we're also going to charge them for two manhattans as well yes you said since i guess we are this has now turned into the wedding podcast yes um you mentioned in another episode uh mistakes things you wish you had done differently or avoided is there anything

that you can share on that front yeah uh are you guys doing champagne for your toast uh probably what the fuck here are two things around alcohol that i found one okay the the beer wine with a signature cocktail is never like it's so much the expense of just going full bar is so much better than just having the signature cocktail and beer and wine at the wedding like it changes the entire atmosphere of the wedding so like i highly recommend going full bar you may already be doing that the other thing is champagne is such a fucking racket and such a waste because nobody wants it at the wedding everybody's if you've got a full bar everybody's already got the drinks that they like or that they want and they just cheers with those like the idea that you have to cheers with this one mediocre mid-tier c plus drink instead is silly and like so we

by the end like we thought we had to do champagne everybody's like you have to do champagne champ to do champagne and then maybe with my brother somebody was like you don't have to do champagne like it's not you don't you don't have to invite that aunt you don't like like the wedding will still count right and we were like oh yeah and he then you also don't have to have somebody comes through and puts all the glasses on the table and pours all the drinks during the speeches and stuff nobody wants and like you look at a wedding at the end all that's left on the tables are water glasses and the champagne like champagne glasses with one a flute with one sip out of it like nobody wants that's a level of pageantry i'm i'm more okay with

i think there's something charming about that to me one thing i'll say about weddings and like a lot of these sit down dinner formal events uh the waiters who will who come by to exclusively offer red or white wine has always been mind-boggling to me you should be able to there will be wine at the wedding you should get your wine but they they set these things up where you have a cocktail hour where you can get whatever you want and then you have your champagne toast where you have champagne and then that you sit down when it's time to eat and they're like do you want a red or white wine it's like i want the fucking double bourbon on the rocks that i've been drinking all night. I'm not going to switch gears.

The champagne was a nice little diversion, but I'm not going to suddenly drink red wine now just because there's fish in front of me. Right. Did you guys already sit down and pick out wines and stuff, or is that yet to come? No, that's yet to come. that's yet to come there there's we're we're front-loading with a lot of the stuff that is like that has a uh timer on it that you need to book before it gets booked by someone else and get all of those things sewn up and then uh not that i imagine any wedding plan is is smooth sailing at any part but once we get these things sewn up it's pretty smooth sailing in terms of just like now we're gonna have our our tasting now we're gonna do the cake thing now we're gonna come up

with our signature cocktails now we're gonna focus on like songs that people are gonna come in and out to we're gonna focus on like yeah the fun readings we're gonna do all this kind of stuff that has no real timer on it. That, that is, uh, not that any part of this has been arduous, but those parts are going to be the more fun aspects of it. And we're saving them to later as a treat. Those are the best parts. I,

I'll in the middle of wedding planning for me, like we were doing special trips to Colorado cause we had to go taste stuff and things like that. And we were in like the real logistics hell of it um in the very middle of it and i remember being at dinner with my mom and colleen and we're getting asked a bunch of questions like we're just getting grilled about the things that we want i'm tired of thinking about it and uh i this is not like i was not trying to get away from my wife and i was not trying to get away from my mom i love both of them and i'm they're like the most important people in my life

but there was we were sitting there and on the wall of this because we got married in like this old mining town so on the wall there was a this head of an elk and i'm looking at it and just fantasizing that the entire rest of the body, the elk just comes bursting through the wall. And I just get on its back and ride away into the woods. And then I'm in the woods and I'm away from all these decisions and everything that's on my shoulders at that moment. And I'm just like, that would be so nice. Just rode an elk into the woods so i understand you'll have an elk in the woods moment no i want to tell you actually about the

the worst vendor that we met with this uh yeah hell yeah shout out photographer who who spoiler alert didn't get the job and uh we had like a scheduled zoom with him and uh he did not show up on time which was strike one and he had and he gave like no notice or anything like that uh 10 or so minutes in we messaged him it was like hey are we still on for this 7 p.m monday zoom he's like oh yeah sorry i've been working all day. I hadn't even got time to go to the bathroom. So give me like five, ten minutes. And then finally this meeting happens.

And we're, because as much as everything is logistical to do, we're still excited every time we talk to a vendor because everyone we talk to might be the person who's going to be perfect for our wedding. so we're there like amped at high energy and uh my fiance is asking him uh a bunch of questions like has this whole like like preamble setup thing and he looks like he's paying attention and nodding the whole time and then finally when it's just starting to speak he goes okay excuse me i'm gonna be typing now so i'm gonna because i'm gonna be taking notes during this meeting so if you see me typing that's what i'm doing april 14th 2024 i was like

oh you missed some of the notes buddy if you just and i asked uh a question that i had that is like not the best question in the world it's it's a very delicate one to talk to photographers about because they're they're artists too and i and i don't want to step on their toes or anything but i was trying to communicate like what we understand we recognize that you're an artist and we don't want to tell you how to do your job obviously and everything like that but i have been to weddings before where for example in like the getting ready moments in the morning uh groomsmen don't take as much don't need as much time uh as is typically required and what happens is groomsmen will show up for a getting ready, uh,

photo shoot. And we show up amped and ready and having a good time and photos start taking, getting taken. And then photos continue to get taken. And there's like, I've had photographers who were like, let's really zoom in on these cufflinks.

Let's really zoom in on this. Let's get a couple of different options of bup, bup, bup, bup, bup. And again, I know that like, they're trying to get the absolute perfect picture, but this is, I wanted to know if a photographer could be in tune to, again, I'm going to use the

imperfect word, vibes. If they can notice when the energy is being sucked out of a room and what they've done in the past or like what levers they pull is there uh a safe word to communicate it's like we've got to wrap this up soon because because the energy is dying and we don't we're we are no longer having fun as a group standing here while you take a picture of a wristwatch getting hit by the light in the exact right way. This is, there's,

there's a lot of people who like need to have their energy for the next 12 hours. Yeah. And like, and let's move, you know, that kind of thing where I was like asking him, I respect you as,

as an artist, but, but what do we do in situations like this art? Do you feel like you're particularly good at picking up on that that kind of tone and uh our listeners won't see i'm i'm doing some prop work now he he reached for a candle and he and uh as he's answering my question he goes I've done like 500 weddings, and I have these meetings, and the questions are so boring. And I'm trying to find a way to answer it for you that isn't boring. I'm trying to light this candle, too.

I like to have candles when I work. I can't, I can't get this candle to light. Oh, see, I'm holding up the camera. Yeah, a candle. This candle's, this candle's done. Let me grab this candle now. And now he's lighting another candle. And that is the end of his answer. He never really gets around to it. He says cufflinks a few times Because that was a word that I said in my question. He was like so when people talk about cufflinks You know, yeah, I like to have candles when I work and I was like, okay great. That's the answer to my question and yeah, then Shay was asking him

one of her questions and I've already at this point i have tapped her foot with my foot uh a code that we hadn't worked out in advance that was i'm done now and then she taps my foot right back and i thought we really should have discussed this i don't know if she like her foot tapped me was like settle down this is fine this is gonna be fine she asked him a question and before answering instead of answering her question he's like yeah the thing about like the best time of night oh then he just starts like pinching at the air in the the room just like like snapping at the air

around him and he's like and he goes uh see i got i have cats here and they get their hair it floats around all the cat hair is always floating around it's it's it's hard sometimes when i'm editing and like developing with all this cat hair and i am ready to like grind my grind a hole into the floor with my foot and then uh fiance is like listen we don't want to take up too much of your time uh it seems like you're you're a little distracted today and we're gonna go in another direction thank you very much for your time he's like oh okay and that was the end of our call and uh it was like you couldn't have scripted a better example of someone who does not want to get hired for this job. Like, truly, I mean, you could have if you wanted to be completely ridiculous.

But if it really felt like he had a boss or a co-worker or someone who was like, look, you need to at least take the meeting to, to prove that you, you are trying to get hired. That's all you got to do. And then he decided, all right, that's all I will do. And then,

and proceeded to have like the most, the strangest and most out of touch and like uninterested, uh, vibe energy you could ever meet from anyone yeah especially when the question is are you good with like energy checks right are you doing one right now that's so bad wow yeah i never had any that were that i've had contractors before like to work on stuff where i'm like oh fuck you should yeah i need my roof fix and you showed up in sandals no i'm not you can't get up there but like i've never never for a wedding especially with with the other wedding people that we talk with because it seems like if you're gonna get in the wedding vendor racket you need to you need to at the very earliest stage get the memo

that you were talking to very excited people and you need to match that level of excitement everybody else that we talk to it's it's it you feel like royalty because you email people about a hotel block or you talk to people about a venue and they're like first of all congratulations you two look great i love your energy you're like the way that we've grown accustomed to people talking to us it's so nice and it's never going to happen again no one is ever going to congratulate us for any other joint purchase that we have to do but right now just everyone who's like like we we when we picked our venue they're like hey let's pour some champagne let's take a picture of you at the

venue saying you just booked your venue and now here's a glass of champagne each and she's like i do deserve to be treated this way and like everyone is that level of of kind and excited and then this photographer who i truly don't know how he's ever booked a job in his life is lighting candles and complaining about cats and couldn't be fucked to answer our questions that's so fucking wild like sir you you just called me boring. Everybody else in this industry calls me sir or stud. That's how I expect to be treated now. I've become accustomed, you see. Well, I mean, I'm very excited to, first of all, the wedding,

but also just to continue to talk about the wedding going forward. Are you okay with that? If we on other podcasts certainly i mean we'll see if it if it tanks our numbers but it's there's uh it's impossible for me to not talk about it it's very difficult today was my mom's birthday shout out to mom uh you made me. You're the best. And we FaceTimed her for a while and talked about wedding stuff. And then there was a distinct moment in the conversation where I was like, but enough about our wedding stuff. This is your birthday.

This is about you. What are you doing for you on this day? Oh, we're so excited to go dress shopping with you next week. And there was not a pause to breathe and i segued into another wedding thing it's just it's uh it's my full-time job now it's it's i'm more likely to talk about that than i am about my part-time job at last week tonight yeah you will be for a while and then it will all just disappear in your brain Yeah But I'm very excited for you I'm excited to keep talking about it I have some like tips for you for like ceremony and stuff

If you ever want them Yeah we can talk about it next time Because frankly we're out of time Oh thank goodness Yeah thank you everybody for joining us This is of course quick question You already knew that You can follow Daniel or I on Blue Sky

I'm kind of like hitting my stride on Blue sky i feel like i'm doing some good jokes over there you're really doing a lot of jokes what a kind way of agreeing with me daniel you can still find a quick question on x at QQ underscore Soren and Dan. We have an email, which is QQ with Soren and Daniel at gmail.com. On Instagram, new handle, baby, QQ Soren and Daniel. And we also have a Patreon, which is Patreon slash Quick Question. We've been having a lot of new video bonus content on there lately.

And if you want to just watch these videos instead of listening to them, you can do that at YouTube, at youtube.com slash at qq podcast our theme song is by mirex if you'd like to listen to their music do it just type in mirex to like spotify or if you want their full albums you go to mirex.com no sorry mirex.bandcamp.com and uh yeah that's it happy birthday to your Hey, thank you. I think that the video podcast is a real trip for people because sometimes my eyes are going all over the place because I'm thinking and I'm trying not to stare down at my computer and be present. And I also avoid the camera.

But sometimes I stare right at the camera and it's yeah it's perhaps too much that's i find myself when i'm doing bits doing it directly to the camera yeah all right bye I wanna hear your thoughts, wanna know what's on your mind I've got a quick, quick question for you, alright The answer's not important, I'm just glad that we could talk tonight So what's your favourite? Who did you get? When will I be remembered? Was it out there? Word at all that I've got a reason

Oh forget it I saw a movie, Daniel O'Brien Two best friends and comedy writers If there's an answer they're gonna find it I think you'll have a great time here I think you'll have a great time here