Quick Question with Soren and Daniel - Ma Ma Mailbag!

Episode Date: July 9, 2022

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C'est facile à utiliser et vous obtenez vos remises par PayPal ou par chèque. L'idée est simple. Les magasins paient Rakuten pour leur envoyer des gens magasinés. Et Rakuten partage l'argent avec vous sous forme de remise. Téléchargez l'application gratuite Rakuten et ne manquez jamais un bon deal. Ou allez sur rakuten.ca pour en avoir plus pour votre argent. C'est R-A-K-U-T-E-N. I've got a quick, quick question for you, alright? The answer's not important, I'm just glad that we could talk tonight So what's your favourite? Who did you get?

When will I be remembered? What's it out there? Where did all the bad weeks end? Oh forget it I saw a movie, Daniel O'Brien Two best friends and comedy writers If there's an answer, they're gonna find it. I think you'll have a great time here. I think you'll have a great time here.

So, hello again and welcome to another episode of Quick Question with Soren and Daniel, the podcast where two best friends and comedy writers ask each other questions and give each So, hello again and welcome to another episode of Quick Question with Soren and Daniel, the podcast where two best friends and commentators ask each other questions and give each other answers. I am one half of that podcast, senior writer for last week, tonight with John Oliver, author of How to Fight Presidents, and, very briefly, one of the ladies who lunch, Daniel O'Brien. Joined, as always, by my co-host, Mr. Soren Bui. Soren, say hello. I'm sorry, I'm reeling what you went to a lady's lunch yeah so um i volunteer every week at a food pantry i uh reluctantly bring it up uh at every

possible opportunity and there's every once in a while there's there's like an email blast to all the volunteers uh about some other opportunity that is raising funds for our food pantry. And there was a luncheon hosted by the Women's League on some Monday. And it was a luncheon and silent auction. And you pay $45 to get in and get a great meal. And you can participate in a silent auction. And all the money goes to our pantry and i always want to support it i love this pantry so i emailed the the woman who sent

the invitation out and i was like this might be a dumb question can can guys go because i know it's put on by the the the women's league and she was like that's not a dumb question uh there won't be a lot of guys but you can absolutely go. I was like, great. So it was a Monday. So me and my friend Susan, who I do my Monday morning Orange Theory class, I got us both tickets and we got dressed nice and fancy after class to go to this luncheon. And I was by a mile the only guy there.

And I was, by a mile, the only guy there. We were, I was the only guy. And we were the two youngest people by about 40 years. Okay. And we walk into this thing. And as we're like putting our names in, I hadn't seen the dais yet. But as we're putting our names in, the woman taking our names down said to me, you're very brave. I didn't know what she was talking about. And just the way my ego works, I'm just like, thank you.

Like, I was primed to hear that from someone. You're very brave for wandering into this balkic witch's circle out in the woods. And we felt immediately out of place and there was like four or five giant round tables that were mostly full and we just found like we were the only two people who sat at a two-person table uh and no one was fucking talking to us at all we got our drinks from the bartender uh who uh as soon as he saw us I who are you uh are you guys the entertainment tame it like nope nope I volunteer with the pantry I'm we're just I'm here to support this is my friend Susan and they

it was impossible I've never felt less welcome somewhere. I really thought people would come up to us and, like, if they were curious, figure out what our deal was. Because this is, like, a closed event. And if they asked, I could say, yeah, I bought tickets just like you. Like, we're excited to do this. I volunteer at the pantry. Surely, once you learn this information about me you'll like me but we'd never get to that point because no one talked to us at all and as if they were all on the same page the waiters forgot us and like for a while didn't take our order

and then we finally like flagged someone down and they were like yeah yeah, are you guys with this group? It's like, yes. It's like a closed hall. We couldn't possibly be with anything else other than this group. And they took our order and then they forgot to give it to us. So we like ate after everyone else ate. And we were so overwhelmed when we first got there that we didn't immediately do the auction part of it while everyone else was doing it. And then when salads were happening, that's when we decided we're going to get up and we're going to do this auction. And we were the only ones who walked over to like all the...

Do you know how a silent auction works? Yes, of course. Yeah. So we walk over to all these baskets of different items that we can bid on. And no one was around to sell us tickets but i still thought like if we stand here near the tickets long enough someone will either help us or tell us they can't sell us tickets for whatever reason and that never happened we just stood there silently in front of everyone clearly we wanted to participate in this auction.

And clearly, the women were all on the same page that we would not be allowed to. So we just sat back down, ate our lunches, and then like scuttled away in the middle of the auction. That's amazing. Thanks to Shopify for supporting Quick Question. Shopify is a platform designed for anyone to sell anywhere, That's amazing. Thanks to Shopify for supporting Quick Question. Shopify is a platform designed for anyone to sell anywhere, giving entrepreneurs like myself the resources once reserved for big business. For a free 14-day trial and full access to Shopify's entire suite of features,

go to shopify.com slash QQ. Today's episode is sponsored by Honey. These days, it feels like online shopping is the only shopping we do. That's where Honey comes in. Honey is the free shopping tool that scours the internet for promo codes It was bizarre and weird and like, I'm kind of glad we weren't, for no clear reason, allowed to participate in the auction because as the day went on i thought like i don't if the only boy here wins they're gonna be mad if i win this like nice set of lavender bath bombs they're gonna be really pissed at me and i don't know what i'm gonna do you didn't find the woman that you had communicated with who said you should come? No, I talked to her afterwards. I emailed her later because it all felt so strange.

Yeah, good Lord. First of all, I don't even know what a luncheon is. I assume that it's just, here's my idea of what it is. A bunch of people in white lace gloves sitting around chatting after church and eating finger sandwiches. Is that close? Yeah, it's not far from that.

I don't think they were gloves, but it's like they're dressed up, and they're drinking, too. It's like a boozy affair, which surprised me. But they're like all these much older gals at this big fancy luncheon. at this big fancy luncheon. Like, like you, it's a preset menu, but it's, you know, nice, nice beef dish or nice pasta dish or nice chicken dish. And it's, it's pretty clearly something they all look forward to.

And I, I learned that I'm not actually invited to this if it ever comes up again. I imagine that it's not, they don't, like, I don't, no one was bringing plus ones. I think this was exclusively paying members of this women's league and me and Susan, which is fine. I don't want a crasher club. I didn't think I was doing that. Right. But you were, so I think that maybe things could have gone a different direction had you not chosen a two-person table.

Yeah. Because that's pretty tough to approach somebody at. Yeah. But we were way too overwhelmed and out of sorts just like plop ourselves down at one of the joint tables. I wonder what story they're telling. Yeah. Like other people after this, like these two young teenagers crashed our party.

Right. I don't know how they got in. Yeah. I, party right I don't know how they got in yeah I I really wanted to to communicate at some point hey I'm not crashing this I'm not trying to take advantage of this I paid paid money like like all of you but I was just never given a platform to say that should just shouted it as you were leaving as you're being pulled out by susan as you're like carried dragged away i paid to be here i'm no different than you we're the same um wow that's incredible dan but hearing stories from you is not what this episode's about

great this is a different type of episode. This is the episode where we think about you, the viewers, for fucking once. Wait, not viewers, listeners. Where we think about you, the listeners, and you ask us questions every once in a while. And we wholly ignore them until these moments where we're like, oh, these are actually some pretty good questions. And then we answer them in our mailbag episode. Hmm. I don't think a ticker tape fits there.

I'm going to come up with a different sound effect next time. I don't think there's anything in a mailroom that does that noise. No, but I don't really have any like polls as far as mailroom noises. So I'll think about it. Maybe a horse clumping. That register the track. Yeah, this is mail. So I'll think about it. Maybe a horse clomping. Does that register? Does that track? Yeah.

Horses, male. Yeah. Well, let's get into the questions. There's some really good ones here and they all deserve their due. So this question is from at tongue surgery. Bizarre. Crazy, crazy name. At tongue surgery.

Which of the following do you think will happen first? Daniel's birthday present being finished or Gabe's website being finished? What a dig. What a dig on both of us. Yeah. New listeners, Soren has been promising me a birthday present since 2018, 2017 maybe. I think 17. A pretty epic birthday present. We've 17. A pretty epic birthday present. An expensive birthday present. Expensive birthday present. We've gotten hints a few times.

He's contracted out with a person who was putting it together. At some point, a version of it was complete that neither Soren nor the creator were happy enough with that they could just get this whole thing over with and give it to me uh and i believe that the last update that that the creator went back to the lab on this yeah then i i i texted i texted him in um probably like i think september or or October of last year. And I was like, this is the birthday. This is the date I'm trying to hit.

I noticed online that he had been saying about like he was working on projects. And I was like, hey, here's, remember me? Here's the date. I had also along the way given him out. So when I started to realize that this was taking for a very, very long i was like if this is not a project you want to do that's fine just tell me he's like no no i very much want to do it i think it's a great idea and i was like okay then we will keep going and and since then just always radio silence until i get in contact with them this is the date he's like okay when's his birthday and i was like this is the date

this is it he's like okay and he didn't commit to anything firmly and with good reason because that date came and went and nothing showed up but i will give you an update on this oh boy delivered by side of train car a horse running up against a train car to deliver this. I don't think this is a good news update. You can believe it. And I just might give away some more, but I noticed that this person also sells,

this is their job. So they also, they don't just do these, like I can do this like personalization thing they also sell their own products as well and I noticed something in their shop that was dangerously similar to this but not quite hit and I'm wondering if he was just like punting he's just like gonna kick okay he's gonna punt on it he's like, I'm just never going to talk to this person again. And instead I will release this other thing

that I think is, it's such a lateral move. Like it's, I think that it's at least inspired by this. So now I'm very concerned that this will never be done. Did you commission from this person something that they cannot do no because the he sent me those samples uh he sent me like an early uh version of it and like a and i was like yeah yeah this is it and then he was very unhappy with elements of it that i was

like okay uh sure and he's like i don't know that i want to finish it do you want it in this state and i was like no and he was like okay then i will scrap it and i'll start again and i was like okay and since then nothing i mean that was rito sounds and that was over a year ago and so i then i saw this pop up and i was like, you fucker. Like, I think that you have fucked me here. I think that you have found something else. And I think part of the reason that he liked the project in the first place was because he thought it would also,

God, I'm giving away an awful lot here. He thought that in addition to you owning the original, he could sell his version of it in his shop as well. he could sell his version of it in his shop as well. So I'm going to try and get in touch with him again, see where we stand, see if he's ever, try and get like a real rundown from him on whether he's going to complete this or not. If he's not, maybe I could ask for the version that he did complete

and see if he would give me that. Or I could just say, fuck this. Like you fucked me here. Or I could just say, fuck this. You fucked me here. And I was so nice about it too because early on he was like, I was like, here's what I would like. He's like, that sounds great. It'll cost this much.

And it was exorbitant. And I was like, perfect. I respect that. This is how much I will pay for it. Perfect. And he's like, all right. And he's like, just look at my website so you get a sense of how often this kind of thing,

how long this kind of thing takes. And he's got a lot right. And he's like, just look at my website so you get a sense of how often this kind of thing, how long this kind of thing takes. And he's got a lot of verbiage in there that's like, please don't contact me within the first four months of this because I will not even have started working on it. And so I was very polite about it and didn't. And haven't checked in with him except maybe like every eight months I will check in with him to see if we're even any closer

and just nothing. And at this point, this has been way, way too long. This is clearly one of those projects where he loathes, where he doesn't want to go back to it, but he also, I also think that this would be great for his business. Like our 12 of our listeners would probably be interested in this 12 people. But anyway, it's, it's been, it's been tough for me. At this point, there are a lot of people saying very hurtful things online that they don't think the president ever even existed. I do. I want, I think it's important our listeners know that this is a real thing, even though I haven't seen any proof of it i if this was a prank it would be a better

prank it would be more the details that you give with updates would be a more frequent and be more specific and crazier and crazier yeah you would you would like, the stakes would go up because that's a natural comedy progression. But the stakes have not gone up. Time has gone on. As a joke, it's gotten worse. And that's not how Soren writes jokes. He writes good jokes. So this is real.

It's definitely a disaster,'s it's certainly not fake i can't wait till it's done and i can tell you every detail of it and i can show you what's actually in his shop and stuff like that so you could be like yes you were wrong but to answer your question tongue surgery uh, Gabe will never have a website. I don't believe Gabe cares about his career. Also, I think that's the wrong, the way this question was pitched was what's going to happen first, Daniel's birthday present being finished or Gabe's website being finished. I think we can move that challenge to Gabe's website being started. And I think it's still going to be my present in a walk.

Yeah, I think that's probably true. I don't know. People must be beating down Gabe's door already because he is in no hurry to advertise himself. Ha-ching! Ah, I love that sound. That sound makes me smile with my whole body. That's the sound of another sale on Shopify.

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store that brings your idea to life and tools to manage and drive sales believe me this podcast started as an attempt for me and soren to make long distance calls without getting charged those steep long distance prices yes that is a very old-fashioned thing to be concerned about, but every penny counts. So we dressed up our phone calls as a podcast, and now it is a full stinking business. We are small business owners. We are entrepreneurs. And I love how Shopify makes it easy for anyone like us to run our own business. Shopify powers millions of entrepreneurs from first sale to full scale. You can gain knowledge and confidence with resources to help you succeed. Plus, with 24-7 support, you're never alone.

Hey, Shopify is here for you. It's more than a store. It grows with you. This is Possibility powered by Shopify. Go to Shopify.com slash QQ, all lowercase, for a free 14 14 day trial and get full access to Shopify's entire suite of features. Start selling on Shopify today. Go to Shopify dot com slash QQ right now. Next question is from Dr. Liam, who is on Twitter as at audio worm. What meal slash restaurant was so good that you have been chasing that ever since only to ever be continually mildly disappointed that no other culinary

experience has been able to quite match the perfect alignment of stars that was that meal? Great question. It immediately comes to mind. I mean, without even thinking, I'm like, yeah, it's obviously this. When I was a kid, my brother was looking at colleges along the east coast and we went to williams and at williams there was this deli and i went and got a sandwich there with my family i would have been it doesn't matter how old i was 13 i don't know but uh i it was the best sandwich i'd ever had in my life it was like i didn't know what they had done the obviously it was warm, which was new to me,

but it was like, it would have been like perfectly heated. I don't know if they like toasted it with mustard on it or what. And like the cold cuts on it, everything about it was so fucking good that throughout all of high school, I thought I wanted to go to Williams so that I could go have this sandwich again.

And I was like, this is it. This is, this is everything. And my parents were like, since then have been like, Hey, you know, you could stop talking about the sandwich. It wasn't actually that good. And I was like, no, no, no, you don't understand. It was the best sandwich I've ever had. And they're like, yeah, we all had the sandwiches. They were fine. I don't know why your memory of this is like why you're doing this in your brain but it was like i could still i can still taste it i'm trying to like think of what to equate it to for uh maybe like one of our listeners there's a place called bay city deli in uh santa monica and they have very

good sandwiches very well the bread's incredible great of meat but it was like that but it was like a warm sandwich that was very easy to bite through so it wasn't chewy at all but it was like that but it was like a warm sandwich that was very easy to bite through so it wasn't chewy at all and it was the cheese was just a little melted but the mayonnaise was nowhere near the heat so the mayonnaise didn't have that like greasy film to it and it was just the tomatoes were perfect oh oh so good i uh think it's so funny how much you love sandwiches it's it's like barely a genre of food that i even think about it's not even like a vast array that i'm celebrating of sandwiches i only do a turkey sandwich now that I go it's like there are four ingredients and still I'm like this is heaven if they get it right and other times I'm like what with a fucking waste how it shut this place down there's I

know I know there's no reason for this but it's it feels so childish to me you're like oh boy I can't wait to go home and get a sandwich. It's not an adult thought that I've ever had. I'm laughing because I feel very seen. You're absolutely right. I shouldn't be this way. But the right sandwich is just like, there's nothing like it.

It's so good. Yeah. This is not a sandwich, but my answer to the question is, it's annoyingly like fancy-ish sushi at this place called Sugarfish, which is a chain. There's a bunch of them all over the country. And I, it wasn't the first sushi I had. I had sushi throughout like high school and college and was, and was, would get it from pretty much anywhere. And like, and I didn't

know what anyone was talking about when they, when they mentioned like really good sushi because I was like, the sushi that I get fucking pre-made at Ralph's is as good as any sushi I've ever had. I was happy with the sushi selection. And then the first time I went to Sugarfish for a business lunch with Cracked and I think it must have been Earwolf. We went there and it was so good. It's like normal sushi that you've seen in the world, but also like sashimi where you're really just eating raw fish and they would have just like the tastiest fish

on a little blob of hot rice, like warm rice. And you order the like trust me menu where the chef just brings you what he thinks you will like. And he brings it to you when it's ready and you eat it. You eat it the way they tell you to eat it. They're like this one, soy sauce, this one, no soy sauce. You do that. And it was so fucking good. And I remember being there with, uh, Jake Fogelness, And I remember being there with Jake Fogelness, comedian, writer, podcaster, radio host. And we were both like, I don't think either of us had any business being at this meeting. They were doing like business stuff.

And me and Jake were just like, hey, it's nice to meet you. I like your work. And then the rest of the thing, just like the sushi is really good, right? Like we couldn't stop talking about how good the sushi was and both of us had a similar moment of like this is what people mean when they say good sushi i didn't know i thought it i thought all sushi was the same and now i understand that i've been eating garbage sushi uh and i've gone to sugarfish probably 20 times since then, and it's never been the same. It's that, like, you know, it's the first time you're in the ocean, the first time you're trying ice cream, which is like, this unlocked the palate, but it's not, it doesn't mean Sugarfish is the best sushi in the world all the time. It just means that it was the first good sushi I had.

Yeah, it was the first time you had experienced it on that level yeah yeah i had a similar experience at so you know who david chang is i was really hoping this was going to be at subway do you know they had turkey meatballs at subway for a while and then they dropped them what the are you trying to lose money? Subway? Turkey meatballs. It was the best. David Chang has a restaurant called Momofuku. And he's like, he's featured on chef's table and stuff like that. He's very good chef, very cool guy. And Momofuku is what it was a similar experience where I went there. I'd been to fancy restaurants before where

I'd been like, this is just food. I've talked about it on this podcast where I'm like, I don't get it. Somebody give me the arsenal to unlock the tools I need to understand why this is better. But I went to Momofuku and I was like, oh, this is different. This is fundamentally different than anything I've ever had before. And it's the most delicious food I've ever had in my life. Ramen? They did have ramen

yeah they had crispy um tofu they had a um duck on this like bread with a plum sauce that and somebody comes to the table and like carves the duck for you it's like the experience of it is also really incredible too but every single element of this meal, I was blown away by it. I was like, oh, I get it now. Like this is incredible. Like this is the best food I've ever had in my life. And since then, you know, chasing that dragon, but never going back,

because it's in Las Vegas and I've got no real reason as a father of small children to go to Las Vegas. But that's a very similar experience where i was like i think i think i i'm at a new echelon now like i've reached a new level if i went back it would be like i'd be like oh yeah it's the same okay great i wouldn't i wouldn't have the same experience again that ratatouille experience yeah there is a uh a restaurant that I go to Every time I'm in North Carolina Called Mr. P's

They have a prime rib there That's the best prime rib I've ever had in my entire life And I'm there Because I'm visiting my parents And it's like I'm almost a bad son about it

Because They want to Show me around their town That they love so much And I can experience Different things I'm like no no mr p's bistro i want the prime rib that's it that's where that's that's why i came here to

north carolina and that's that's not the problem of sugarfish because this place every single time i get it it is perfect they really nail it every single time i love this place but the only problem is a time that i've been there where they were out of the prime rib is that's like too crushing of a loss for me. I'm really close to being like, then I shall have nothing. Right. Because of the excitement that you had leading up to it and the expectation that they don't have it. You're like, you know, I don't think you understand what you just did to me. Yeah. No, I'm not.

I don't want a different meal. I'll never be hungry again. You had your shot with me. This is a huge emotional blow and you're not respecting that by offering me jalapeno poppers instead. Completely, wildly,

what a swing to guess jalapeno poppers as your specific poll something that feels completely cheap and like just a cheap different yeah like something that they'd give you and instead be like yeah maybe he wants this. Oh boy. I used online shopping. Let's see. It's a Thursday when I'm recording this. I have used online shopping three times this week. I do it all the time. Uh, that's three is probably an average. Uh, I get groceries there. I get presents there. I do it constantly. I love online shopping. Uh, I don't always have a promo code ready to go at checkout. I feel like I wander around through my life and I hear so many promo codes being offered at various podcasts and I never write anything down. But thanks to Honey, manually

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Yeah, I'll take it. Big Dan Boyle has asked, what's the most lost you've ever been? I think probably technically I have been more lost than this story that comes to mind, but I'm doing this one anyway. This was summer between my freshman and sophomore year of college. I'd had a first date with a girl and I was picking her up and I had previously dropped her off late one night, early one morning

at her house, and this was a time when, like, I had a cell phone, I think, but cell phones certainly didn't have GPS, and I didn't have, like, a TomTom in my car. There's still, like, a neighboring town to the town where I grew up in, so it was, we just knew where things were back then. We just like had to remember where stuff was. So dropping her off once, uh, I felt pretty confident that I could find her house again when I picked her up for our date. And I absolutely could not. And I didn't have a cell phone. So I had no mechanism of like solving this problem. I didn't have a cell phone so I had no mechanism of like solving this problem I didn't know what I could do I just drove around thinking like if I drive around her town long enough something will look familiar and then the problem that always happens when you get lost is

if you drive in circles everything starts to look familiar because you've been in that same neighborhood for now 25 minutes. And I'm disastrously late for our date. And I pulled into a 7-Eleven parking lot and called my parents with quarters like change from a payphone and said, can you open a phone book? this is the oldest story i have ever told calling them from a payphone in a parking lot and say can you open the phone book and i gave the last name and uh tell me how many there are and like do any of them live in this town and we found the one that lived in this town and they read off the street name for this person and then I found her house that way but it was maybe a full hour late for this date and again I I can't even call her and say I'm lost I

will be there I'm still committed to this date I'm just making her sit at her house like an asshole waiting for me so I can finally get there an hour late and say, we can still make Batman Begins, but we're going to have to skip Fridays. This is an old story. That's incredible. I mean, do you have any sort of like geographical markers, like hills or something like that, that you can just drive towards? And I, again, I felt confident that I could find her home again, because that's just how we all did things in the past. Yeah, yeah.

Like, we had to. That part of my brain still worked, because I needed to know where all of my friends lived. And usually you could lock it in at, like, one visit in at like one visit because you know your town well enough. But this was the neighboring town and the only time I had been to her house was like an all night cast party that we left at 3 or 4 in the morning and drove around and ended at her house and stupid ass teenage Daniel was like yeah this is good circumstances for committing something to memory I won't ask her again for this information I did I was thinking the

other day about that like I used to go to auditions and things like that and I would be like oh I've been to this building before I'll find it and I know that it's on Olympic and Olympic runs from like East LA down to the beach so it's like just driving Olympic when there's no traffic is a 40 minute drive and I was like yeah yeah it's on Olympic don't need for a cross street I'll see it and just like getting on Olympic be like maybe this way just going and that was just and sometimes it would work and that's why you kept doing it. Yeah. I went the wrong way on Olympic. In the time between Cracked and Last Week Tonight, I had a job interview on Olympic.

And I was like, surely I know where that is. And I went the wrong direction for 40 minutes. And if you go the wrong direction on Olympic in LA for 40 minutes, then that's just like, I just didn't go to that job interview. I was like, well, I guess something else will come up. I'm not going to, if I turn around now, I will be four and a half hours late to this job interview. So I guess we're going to do, we're going to play some hardball. I'm going to big time them.

I'm going to see if that works. I've heard of big timing. I want to give it a shot yeah I mean you go the wrong direction and then the time changes because that's what happens in the world yeah but the minute they an hour later going the other direction you might the trip that just took you 40 minutes will take you two and a half to three hours going the back the other direction that's my city yeah um i eventually did get to her house we saw batman begins we we had uh a delightful summer fling uh which is is just it's it's a heartbreaking reality of of just how low the bar is. Wait, was she mad?

Not really. God damn, this poor girl. I know. And again, the date was Fridays and Batman Begins. Guess which one of us picked that movie? And then we couldn't even do Fridays. Hold on, she picked Fridays? No, I orchestrated the whole thing. Yes yes, I, yeah. And on the way there, you played some lunch money criminals. Did you know I'm in a band? I have the bass in the

back. If we can just find an outlet somewhere, we could plug in my amp and you could hear a little, my bass, it's going to sound a little different than the normal song because usually you don't just hear the bass, but you know what I'll do? I'll put it on in the tape deck and I'll just play along. I can't think of a worse date for someone then like hey I'm so fucking sorry I'm an hour late we're gonna have to miss dinner here's some now sit in the car and listen to my stories she was like yeah sure I think about the times when can we do this again when i started dating god help us and like the mistakes that i made along that way and like just being a bad boyfriend early on like

not going to events of hers like one time when she was asked me to come to this event and i was like i go to a lot of her events and my friends are going to body worlds i'm gonna go to that and i was like hey i'm gonna go to body worlds instead she was like what the fuck and i was like yeah that's no i mean i wouldn't have any fun at your thing so i'm gonna go to something that's fun and like you just when you're young you don't know you don't have any idea you're just this selfish blob right hey do you want to come to my dissertation uh who's gonna be there yeah uh is it open bar how's that work? The most lost I've ever been is, I think probably a story that predates that, Dan, even though your story is ancient. Yeah. It's, we were on it. So at the high school that I went to at the beginning of the year, you go on a trip called wilderness,

which is a 10 day backpacking trip where you're, there's no trail, like you're hiking over passes and things like that. And you're up above Timberline for a lot of it. And you're there's no trail like you're hiking over passes and things like that and you're up above timberline for a lot of it and you're reliant on a topographic map for it all and you have a guide there with some of the teachers is usually there with you and and then another student who is like a senior who is the wilderness assistant and there's maybe 10 kids and on my trip we also had the first year over explaining this we all know what high school wilderness trips are well I had a French teacher on my trip because he was brand new to the school too and it everybody has to do it's the orientations wilderness orientation so we're on this trip he

breaks his leg on this trip we're about three days from the end and he's he's got this compound fracture his ankle it's so gross it's like bone sticking out and they're the uh we don't have a radio or anything like that and so our guide she looks at a map and she's like okay we are actually because we're three days out we're only about five miles from where we need to get out of here and five miles in the wilderness as we've discussed previously on this podcast is not the same thing as five miles on city streets it's like uh you can guarantee that it's going to be probably about a mile an hour the speed that you go as you wind through it's not like it's five miles by the as the crow flies not like the path you actually have to take to negotiate all the vegetation and everything so she's like all right we got to pick some people it's going to get dark in probably about

seven hours so you got to get out of here somebody, get a helicopter up here so they can get him. And she's going to send out the people that she thinks are going to do it the fastest. She's not saying that task. She's like the tacit agreement. She's like, she chooses her wilderness assistant, this other kid, Max Mancini, who became my best friend at school. And then she picked me. And we're like, all right, we are going to run out of here basically

and so we're running through the woods like fording rivers and stuff like that and it's taken a while like after a little while like we're not even seeing signs of trail yet and we're like something's wrong and we're heading down this valley and there's no other direction we can really go we're heading down this valley and it's just getting later and later and it starts like the sun starts to set and the wilderness assistant is like, I'm going to, I'm going to go ahead and, uh, and see if what I can find. And we still have a map with us. And like, we're looking at it and we're like, things aren't really adding up here. And we finally see another person and we're like, Hey, uh, can you just show us where we are on here? How long did it take you to get

here? First of all, and they're like, Oh, about half a day. We're like, hey, can you just show us where we are on here? How long did it take you to get here first of all? And they're like, oh, about half a day. We're like, that can't be right. Show us where we are on like this. No, you're not on this map. And so we had, during this wilderness trip, we had been going somewhere fucked off. Like we fucked off this map completely. And we were completely wrong in where we were.

And this is not my fault because I'm a freshman in high school, but our wilderness leader and our assistant should have known this shit and they did not. And so we had been like, every, we get to lakes and we'd be like, well, these are strawberry lakes. No, they weren't. No, those are something else. Like, I don't know how it happened. Cause once you can read a topographic map, like it's pretty easy, but we just, we were somewhere completely different. And so we ended up hiking out 12 miles in an afternoon. And by the time we got out, it was dark. And so we get out and now we get to the trailhead and we're like, and now what?

There's nothing for us to do here except try and hitchhike into town. And we end up walking along the road. Thankfully, a police officer was driving along and got us, took us into town. Like, well, we can't send up a helicopter till tomorrow. They won't be able to find me buddy also you guys don't even know exactly where they are good point good point so we slept on their town hall floor they didn't get beds or anything like that we're like on a gymnasium floor essentially we don't have our sleeping bags they gave us a

blanket to lie on and then the next morning the wilderness assistant went up in the helicopter to go find them. He kind of figured out where on an actual map we were, and he went up to go find them. But that means that they were out there that night, throughout that day thinking, well, helicopter will be along any minute now.

And then they just waited and waited and waited. And then it got dark. And then they were like, oh, they're dead. The boys, the children that we sent out to go save the day have all died. The oldest of them being 17 years old, anywhere like 17 to 14, three kids, they're all dead. And then the next day, it wasn't until like midday

that they actually got a helicopter up there. So he was very lucky that he even like kept his, that lower part of his leg for being having a compound fracture that long But it was like the most I the fact the minute that we saw that we were like trying to show him that on their map Where we were and he pulled out his map and they were not Like they were not the same USGS map. I was like Because a USGS map covers so much ground and we were just not on it right you you traveled to a different map Huh

All right, very fun stuff Well, we'll do another one these mailbags at some point. I really like this. Yeah Okay In the meantime the show is quick question but you already knew that we are recorded and produced by the irreplaceable Gabe Harder our theme song is by the incredible Merex their digital album is available at merex.bandcamp.com

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Soren, you could stop me if I'm wrong. I don't think he'd mind me saying this. He took all of our money that we made from this podcast and started an NFT consulting firm for boys only. A men's only NFT consulting firm. That's not... That's fine to say, right? Why would I be upset with you saying something so accurate

yeah of course so you can find him on the dark web you can email the show at qqwithsorinanddaniel at gmail.com we have a Patreon, you can support us on there and get exclusive episodes of the show once a month where we answer questions from you, it's very much like this

except more intimate bye bye month where we answer questions from you it's very much like this except more intimate i bye yeah i've got a quick quick question for you all right i want to hear your thoughts on what's on your mind i've got a quick quick question for you all right the answer's not important i'm just glad that we could talk tonight so what's your favourite? Who did you get? When will I be remembered? What's it up with?

Where did all the good weeks end? Oh forget it I saw a movie, Daniel O'Brien Two best friends and comedy writers If there's an answer, they're gonna find it I think you'll have a great time here I think you'll have a great time here