Quorators - Legal Advice w/ Charles Star

Episode Date: October 5, 2026

Comedians Clare O'Kane, Alex Ptak, and Jeremy Kaplowitz explore the mysterious land of Quora.com to answer life's questions. This week's questions include: My husband cried after breaking his back in a car accident. I am no longer attracted to him because of this — should I divorce him? How can I as a man avoid women with tattoos and criminal record? Is the lawyer profession a glorified organized crime crew and all lawyers, scum bags? --- Check out more of Charles' work @ https://linktr.ee/ugarles Watch the show @ youtube.com/@quorators Get even more Quorators @ patreon.com/quorators Send quoras and qommunicate on our discord discord.gg/7pPYuKuYCr

If you were a mouse, what kind of mouse would you be? Oh. Handsome. Lab mouse. But one of the ones where it's a good experiment, and it's like they're testing out how it tickles affect being good little boys. They're testing new kisses on Jeremy. I'm actually in the kiss lab.

They're testing like kissing. They're giving him cancer. This one blushes. They're putting cancer on their lips. Oh. What kind of mouse would you be? The kiss gave him AIDS. I would also be a mouse who gets kisses in a lab.

Yeah, we're the same one, bro. Is that why you have a podcast together? Yeah, we're both kiss. We're both little mice. We're both nice. Super white lab mice. Yeah, this is all the criticisms of our show is just for white mice. I don't think that's true at all.

And I wanted to address that up. this week. Thank you, by the way. It's been too long. Clarity, was it? What kind of mouse you'd be? Probably the one that they feed to the snakes. They're all in a lab, though.

They're all in prison in some way. You know, she's just, she's in a pet store, seeing her doom approach. Yeah. Yeah, like they grow, they raised me as a pet. I come to know them and love them, and then they feed me to another pet. Pet store animal is almost the saddest kind of animal. the way. If you think about it.

I used to work at a fish store as a kid where they'd sell fish. And part of it was you had to, you could, people would buy fish to feed to their other fish. And it would be, um, a dollar for 10 goldfish.

Just like, just valuing these goldfish at 10 cents. Just felt so cruel. Just like, right, one, two, three. They lie to the fish. They're like,

it's a lot of money. I know. Yeah. Don't worry, buddy. Whoa. 10 goldfish. This guy just spent a thousand dollars. Michael Bloomberg.

He's buying 10 of you. It's one buck. It's crazy. We just don't want them to be sad. Walking into a pet store and asking for a pound of something. It's not unlike that. Yeah. The meat moves by the pound.

Charles, are you a kind of mouse? I am a wireless mouse. You cannot tie me out. That's cool. I'm untethered. Now we can start the show. He's gaming. Bo, Bo, Bo.

Do do, do, do. With the sound of the robot, you're back in America's premier Quora-based podcast, The Quarators. That's right. The people's choice for a podcast that's on Quora. We have all of your host today. We have Claire, Jeremy, and Alex. There is no fourth host. And all engines are go to start another exciting episode.

And on this exciting episode, we have a very exciting guest. Can you get this podcast right? Alex, do you remember one word of it? From? I get, I remember a lot of things. We were told it one minute ago. From the City Saints, Country Saints podcast. Is that close?

Does that get it? It's close. It's singular. It's singular. But it's about the Saints. But it refers to me and my co-host. City Mouse. Are you guys on the team?

We are not. But we are, we rise and fall emotionally with their success. Well, it sounds like. like a stretch to me. But anyway, Charles Starr is on the show today. It's great to have him here. How's it going? And then he forgot the easy one that you guarantee. And no homework. No homework. No homework podcast. I had to, we gave you a little homework. Just a little bit of homework. And I did not do it. Yeah, that was, that was spiritually a violation of our credo. So sorry. Well, we got them all now. And their names are up in lights. Charles, it's a thrill to have you on the show today.

Thank you so much. I'm happy to be here. We're looking to explore the questions website, Quora.com. Do you have any experience with Quora.com? Only when someone links to it in a get-a-load of this shit way. Sure. Yeah. The purest way to use the website. I would never ask a second person for advice.

I will stumble through life stupidly rather than being guided through life stupidly. It's interestingly, like, and I've said this a million times before, but of the social media websites, because it is supposed to be social media and not just a question hub. or what have you. It feels the least bad to be on here. It's like the most fun to hang out on Quora, but it is like, I don't know, drinking bleach.

So I guess you shouldn't do it for too much. Yeah, it's like one of those fun things of drinking bleach. Yeah, you know, for the first bit of bleach, you're like, I feel fucked up right now. This is the most fun I've ever had. And then, you know, the bleach kicks in a little more. Right. First, the COVID is gone.

Right. And then you're a softening. Yeah. We can make sure. It's clean. I've seen the numbers. We don't have any fans or listeners under the age of 33,

so we can make jokes like that. There's no young, impressionable quarreators, listeners. Okay, good. I'm trying to reach out to teens who drink bleach. Alex on the street, reaching out to teens.

Having me on only raises the average age of your audience. You are now going to be featured in the AARP magazine. We're trying to now... Young heartthrob. We're trying to do the other way. We're trying to get podcasts

with young. young kids. Right. So they can send it to their kids who maybe just circulates around. Oh, there you go. Except my son would sooner die than listen to anything that I've done. Are kids listening to a podcast? Are kids listening to podcasts?

I'm pretty sure they are. Well, I mean, you do video, so you're already a step ahead of most old school podcasters because they, my impression is they consume exclusively video content. Right. because the idea of looking away from their screen is both scary and impossible. Well, I think also they're listening to specifically like men's rights podcast. I think it's mostly strong men telling them how to live. Which could be you, Al, because you're pretty built.

Yeah, I know how to tell people how to live. That's one of the things I know the most. Jeremy, I'm so impressed you knew where text. None of our soundboard is labeled at all. Listen to Alex. Tips for bed. Uh-huh, honey. Judging by my child's internet use,

I find kids are mostly listening to Chris Rachel. Classics, like stuff from like 1970 something, but they have the letter R and the color blue. There was a really good episode I saw the other day where Robin Williams was like 20 in it. It was shocking to watch.

He's singing a song with Grover. Shout out Grover. cool stuff. Oh, was that one with cocaine monster? It had a

new sketch called cocaine monster, which I haven't seen since. But the energy was really high. Right. Seas for a lot of

things. I should stop talking about this one episode of Sesame Street I watched so much, but I thought it was very funny.

They ended the episode SNL style where a lady came out was like, I want to say thanks to everybody came off next to the letter you. Big Bird is here.

They have the same delivery And I was like, did they tell her to do that? Bobby Moynihan. The Roots. We have Alec Baldwin again. Alec Baldwin on a lot of those. Anyways, we're going to get onto the website at some point here. The thing about Cora is it's a place where you dump out your questions

and they are organically answered by the other accounts who are also retirees of some kind, maybe they're in India. And so I guess my question for you, Charles, to start the show, is what is the question of your life? The thing he's going to press first. Well, this is really tough because you've pulled up the website and it looks like Sean Kern has asked my question. Is it racist to dump a date because you have a difficult time communicating through accidents? Questions. Great.

Sean Curran is actually answering this. See, the website is extremely difficult. to read. But this is an answer from Sean. Important to know? Oh, interesting. Important to know? I believe this is a Quora Plus answer because it is a little star. So we paid for this. He says I dated a Cuban beauty

once. Nice, Sean. She was very friendly with a great sense of humor and she was also mind-numbingly attractive. It was loco. We just had one problem. Her English was horrible. My Spanish was non-existent. We really couldn't talk about anything

outside of superficial stuff and I'm terrible. at learning new languages, so we were in a bad spot. Eventually, when mutual infatuation with each other's appearance fades, you are going to need to be able to talk. If you can't talk, you aren't getting anywhere. It's not racist at all to end things with that. It's just good sense for both of you.

Wait, am I thinking of love actually as the movie that proves that this person is wrong, where he like falls in love with the cleaning woman at his remote cabin after, God damn it, what movie is? Yeah, that's love actually. She only speaks Portuguese. It sounds really sexy.

Colin Firth falls in love with the Portuguese made. Okay. Cool. And she's hot. She's sort of a Portuguese beauty. If anybody was listening to the show thinking Sean Kernan, Quora Plus user doesn't get crazy pussy, this answer is for you.

He's dating Cuban beauties. He can't even speak to. His most recent answer is about a company called anal tech. What is this about? The question. This scene. This seems like right out of the analripist business card. Yeah.

But what would this be? I mean, at least aneurys like analysis technology. Okay, okay. There's just too many business names. This is where I am one of those little lab rats at Able. Working in the Richard Geard Division. Yeah, they let me up there. It's important.

It's important science. Okay, well, that's enough of that. We've got Charles's question, and it's already been asked. Is it racist to dump a date if you have a difficult time communicating through accents? Now, I want you to, I thought the answer was going to be no. I did not expect Sean Kernan to come in guns blazing and tell me I should get rid of my Cuban beauty. Yeah, he was too lazy to make it work. That's not the only thing, blazing.

What else is blazing? Blazing penis. Oh, okay. He actually, he has an SDD. To be clear, I mean his blazing penis. Okay. Quora is sort of the moth of the websites. Because people, they give you a theme, and then you share your own story.

And by the end of it, you go, and that's what I knew I could not be with the Cuban beauty. Can we do a show called like Quora StorySlam, where we just have a bunch of people do Quora-style moth stories? Definitely. There I was with my aunt as she began to undress. Yeah, there are a lot of those. I mean pictures of the show, people being like, look, no phones, everyone just vibing. Well, Charles, you are the esteemed guest for today. We try to get the theme for the episode to kind of match our guests and their temperament.

And you are an active legal expert, would you say? Sure. Yes. And that's why this episode is legal advice. Right. Of course. And everything, remember, like every week, the things we say on the show are in legal advice.

Yeah, no, that's what I tell people. This actually is a formal attorney-client relationship. This is our space of the week. Spaces of the week are kind of like subredits on here, and so we'd like to investigate different communities. This is the little one. This is Legal Bonanza. Space of the week.

That's right. Great. These are our spaces. They don't fuck around. It's a registered trademark. You know that they're serious. It's a bonanza. There are 78 followers and one contributor who is Kartikeya Batchan.

Yeah, so these are all, what were you saying? These are all Indian questions. Mostly they're Indian questions. It is on Quora. That's not my fault. Why does India have gender biased laws? Charles, do you know? I'm going to be probably because of the human race is horribly sexist for thousands, if not.

millions of years. Yeah, I think that would probably be it. So this is, I would say this is not specific to India. No, this is an Indian problem. That seems like a very American question. Why is India so sexist? Indian here. Enkora.

The guy's name is Rahu Kumar. Who has been banned. Who has a question. He has really good questions. Dirty truths. Is Western culture declining? What are some dirty truth about government? And dirty truths about television sets.

He's looking for dirty truths. Why do you hate love, parentheses, lust? No one's answered that. Yeah, of course no one's answer that because no one hates it. Are women bad or good? No, wait. Oh, wait, let's be the change here. Which one you want to answer it?

Wait, wait, wait, look into that one because whether women are bad or good could go a long way to answering the question about the biased laws in India. If they're bad, then maybe they're not biased at all. Okay, so let's answer. There's no answers on this yet. We could be the first one to do. It's nine years old. I think the logical answer is bad. Really?

Yeah. Yeah. But like she's a baddie. Right. We can kind of keep it confusing. Yeah, well, you can write his bad parentheses good. Okay. Okay, Jeremy's writing that and this is a podcast.

Good. Great. There, bad. Great, that's been answered. I think he means, he knows we mean sexually there. Yeah, he'll figure it out. I mean, he's been bad. so he can't ever see this, but...

I think he's pretty... He's very obviously a run DMC fan. Yeah, so... Oh, yeah. This is... Alex, this is nothing, the space. Legal bonanza? Yeah, this is kind of nothing.

It's trademarked. Let's move on. Yeah, it's so much. It's been space of the week. I just wanted to promote them. I'm moving on. There's gotta be something interesting in there. Claire, you'd be surprised.

Claire, we just don't have time for it today. There's genuinely nothing. on this. It's important that we move on to our romance and law. No, we're doing five quo. We're starting with questions about the law here in our police and judgment based segment five quo. This is not a real siren. This is in the podcast. You're driving your car and the car alarm is in the podcast. Okay, this was email. It's based on a real siren. This was this was emailed to me by Cora.com. It's just a post by random stoner girl 168. This is a is what Jeremy wants to see.

Yeah, this is just a photo of a girl kind of doing like a millennial style face. She's got like blue bangs. Are they blue or are they green? Is this a dress situation? They're kind of blueish green. Yeah, it's like a kind of brackish water. Mermaid alert.

Like sea foam green. Yeah. Seafum. She's very much doing Scott Pilgrim Ramona Flowers' haircut. Claire, do you want to read those? They put me in the machine from the fly with a J. Crew catalog.

I don't wait. Wait, first I have a question. This is just a post. Yeah. This is sort of an apropos of nothing, social media post. Yes. On gora.com, no question.

This is for Jeremy. This was sent to me by Quora. Someone went to Quora and was like at a book signing and was like, this is more a comment than a question. Yes. Yes. I did not know you could do this. Yeah.

This is an original for us. We've never done this before. Random stoner girl here. I guess it's not really a question per se. All right. I'll read this. Say it right. Just look like the words.

Your heart just fell. Bruh. No dope. No dope for over a week now because I went all psychotic. Fully thought cops were after me when they fucking weren't. and ran through a block of blackberry bushes and trees while scratched my arms, legs, and back hella, to the point where I had to wear my jacket as pants

because they got fucking ripped off by the thorn bushes and then proceeded to look for a bubble I dropped during that for five hours before trying to get home and getting lost in a two-mile loop for another three hours and overall wasn't home until after 11, and I was all aggressive and blue-lipped and shit. And by then, the cops had been called, And I got put in a mental hospital for a full date.

So that was all in parentheses. But I've pretty much been on house to rest since then and been more bored than ever in my damn life. Only gotten a bit of weed since shis sucks. Oh, no. This has been a story slab. Yeah, there we go. I was positive we were going to get the siren sound board. Oh, yeah.

Oh, no. I had Mario saying, oh, no, prepare. Somewhere there's a bong. It's not done yet. Let it ride. But they're both equally relevant here. And you can tell that she was in a mental hospital for a full day. Yeah.

By her face making that duct shape. She's doing sort of like a face palm. Miss me with that. During the psychosis. Now, I have read the comments on here. They are sad. They are? They're all kind of like,

please stop using drugs. You're young. You have your whole life ahead of you. Please don't live like this. I know you're doing this for Jeremy. Stop it. He's going to put your face on YouTube. Is that what you want?

I think she's charming. Random stoner girl, you're better than drugs. Why can't you be random studying, girl? Now, we do have one. One follower in common, which is, of course, Uncle Daddy. She's asked three questions ever. I want to do my belly piercing by myself, can I? And if so, what will I need to do it?

And then how are teens getting alcohol? I'm always asking me. My parents don't have it and I'm scared I'll get caught if I steal. Any tips? Oh, yeah, you just think of the teens. Now I feel kind of bad that it's genuinely a child. What do you? Random stoned her girl.

I feel pretty confident that it would be unwise to give her legal advice that a lot of liquor stores will simply sell to her. We are not giving her that advice. Simply find a place that's owned by an ex-cop. It's that simple. Yeah, I don't know if it's legal advice if we're like, have you tried getting some? Going to the store.

Well, shout out to Random Stoner Girl. She's sort of going viral all the time. You're crazy. We love you. She's posting stuff like, well, low-key bunch of shit happened. Might be for the better. Might not be. I don't fucking know.

This is how I posted on Facebook in high school. Yeah, it's cool as hell. Yeah. I definitely feel like the legal advice that I would give her on the long story you wrote is shit does in fact suck. Shit does suck. And add a lot of Ks to the end so that she does we're serious. Now, I want to compliment Random Sonor Girl 168 on this one attribute, which is she did not fill out her Quora profile. It just says bruh.

It doesn't say where she lives and works. and when she was born and more information. So legally, that was smart here because all you do is talk about doing too many drugs and going crazy. Yeah, and going to the mental hospital. So they're probably not going to find you when they do a search or whatever.

Excellent internet hygiene. Really good stuff. Good job, random stuff. She's the smartest person on this website. Although if that is her cat, I could like search for that. The cat? You have photos of her full face, Alex. If I'm employing her at my ice cream store

and I'm like, wait a minute, I know that cat. All right, brain bolt. That's Deborah's cat. What the fuck are you talking about? Wait, who's Uncle Daddy again? I don't remember. Can we get a refresher? I think he's kind of a bad guy.

Uncle Daddy. Is he a creep perhaps? He was following a child. He knows about things like sex, pornography, meth, parenthesis, work, female masturbation. And female masturbation advice and female masturbate and sluts are us. By the way, if we have a lot of female. listeners listening to this, do not listen to Uncle Daddy's masturbation advice. Why, he's a contributor to the space

soft titties. He should not be giving that advice. He's your father's brother. He has some important posts like, it really just boils down to a heaping, helping of integrity. Got self-respect, or is that sniffs a snort of air? Loathing. I believe it is the latter broom emoji. Poop emoji. That is a good post. Yeah, it's really important stuff.

I can't believe you could post here. That's crazy. I had no idea you could actually express yourself on this website. Yeah, it's sort of a boys in the house situation. Well, that's Uncle Daddy. And that's Random Stoner Girl. Best of luck to her. Stay away from the cops.

I wanted to read more of her stuff, but since she was a child, I'm going to not. Okay, here's a question. Is the lawyer profession a glorified organized crime crew in all lawyer's scumbags? Well? Well, I have mixed emotions about this. They're, you know, a tool is how you use it. Right. Very careful wording choices.

And so the answer is it depends who is wielding the tool. And since I am a man of honor these days, then I can walk out in public without fear of embarrassment. or nearly as much cash as other circumstances would have provided. You're no longer handling cases for the Yakuza. No. Okay. Were they cool the Yakuza when you worked with them? Yeah, I mean, you know, they had some pretty, I don't know,

unrepeatable nicknames for the Jewish guy. Sure, sure. You know, but other than that and my general lack of fitness, which they found really embarrassing. Right. They have all your fingers. Cool. That's good to hear as a fan.

They hit the net 30 on your invoices. They're a very professional organization. Cool tattoos, too. The only big ones. They're amazing. I always see them slicing and shooting people up in Tokyo and I'm like, man, I just hope they're cool in person. I hope they don't use racial words like the G word, Guy Gene.

I'm glad you said it. I can say it was. I have the pass. I'm not from Japan. Are there answers to this? Also, Claire, you have a weird sound happening. I don't know if that's... There's a ghost.

Oh, my God. Someone's doing dishes. Oh, okay. Fair enough. You heard the game down a little bit? Yeah, slam that game. Yeah. Fixed it instantly.

Yes. Reported this question. Oh, yeah. That's from Van Hay. Nark. Ben. Okay, Hal. A lawyer who graduated from law school in Boston in 1879.

You look like late Jack Black. Yeah, he's kind of like Santa Claus looking. Yeah, this is like very piff-whiff. Yeah, Jack Black in his coffin, for sure. This is a nice example of guy who gives every aspect of his life on the internet. We see where he lives. Yes. He was an Adelboro.

Where is that, Alex? His full name. It's in Massachusetts. Well, sure, fair enough. Call him the anti-claws. Can we see what cases he's worked on, I wonder? I don't think that's a thing that is. Oh, I guess you could Google him and find, like, I don't know, information about him, but.

Yeah, he doesn't seem like he's got stoner girls hygiene. I can go on like his LinkedIn. He's like, it literally is his real name with his LinkedIn. I'm on his LinkedIn. Yes. I'm on Alex Patax. He's an assistant public defender at State. Okay, well, now I'm, now that's upsetting.

This hasn't been updated. He's in Attleboro now. Alex, you're getting messages from people. Do you want to read them on LinkedIn? No. Should I read? What cool? Oh, look at this, Alex.

Oh, okay. Somebody's trying to get you a job and you're not even answering. Am I looking to upscale? You know, DeVry will let you keep your own tools. I went to college. I feel like that's got to be on here. I haven't used my LinkedIn's as 2013, but I'm pretty sure I put that on there.

Let me see who asked this question about whether warriors are all part of organized crime. It's from David Behar. Oh, this guy with a motorcycle. Oh, look at this guy. He's like an older dude in a motorcycle. Oh, ladies, control yourselves. Joyless Behar asking the question. That was French.

Uh-oh, here we go. Oh, no. Oh, no, we can't read David's questions. A lot of stuff about the blacks, trans supremacists, the Barbie movie. I was dead on with Joyless Behar. I thought that was just a horrible pun. That was pretty good. The first two after trans supremacists and the blacks being the Barbie movie really surprised me.

Well, the Barbie movie is about like it's being anti-examination. I know, and they came after Matchbox 20. No one was safe. He said, was the Barbie movie an anti-male hate-filled tedious screed by New York City females with German names? Now, Claire, you used to be a New York City female. You don't think Claire's a German name. Yeah, but I don't have a German.

Oh, okay. What's a German? Greta, uh, what's your name? Who's the, Donberg? Yeah, Greta Gerwig. Gerwig. Gerfig. She's basically gerbils, but for, I call her that, yeah.

Why would he be mad at that? I don't know. He's so confused, and that's why his account has been deactivated. Why can't there be a movie called Little Men for once? That was the minions. Oh, yeah, there you go. They are Little Men. Little men.

Why not France? They have Cox. That's a good point, Jerb. France is him. Oh, that's good. Yeah, thanks. I'm going to send them. That's a deal about.

Any other Francis Haw parodies before we move on? I just am amazed. As soon as we clicked on him, and we're not going to read the rest of the question, but it opens with Do the Blacks. And everyone's eyes got big. This was a horrible mistake. Sometimes we do this show live,

and you have to just read the question to 60 people. There's a question from three years ago that says, does your school carry and teach from the gay porn books? boys aren't blue. What is that? Is that a real book? Is that a gay porn book? I don't think it's a gay porn.

No, I don't think it's got to be that. I think it's like a coming of age. It's about like being trans. Now, how are you spelling coming there? Okay, that sounds good, Alex. A coming of age. Yeah, it's kind of a sequel to where the red fur grows. Dom Marine.

Yeah, I don't know. This is always so funny to me when there's like a conservative with a bone to pick about the curriculum of a middle school. Some book about a black person. Who cares? I mean, it's just like it's, it's an autobiography of a person's own experiences as a, you know, coming up as a gay black person. Right. When I read that, it makes me so hard that it's basically porn. Right.

Right. That's, I mean, I think that's what happens is every time they're like, well, you can't say gay. without implying anal sex. And therefore I'm thinking about anal sex and now I have to go change. Right. What's my secret? There's the porn in my mind.

I'm always thinking about anal sex. That's my secret cap. This is the version of the Hulk where he told me turned into the Hulk when he has gay thoughts. Yes. Gay Hulk. Yeah.

You didn't like me when I'm gay. Right. He's exactly the same. as regular home you noticed that Bruce Banner always turns into the Hulk when he's around Thor for some reason right the the much maligned rainbow Hulk run in 1964 well I guess the answer is that the lawyers are all scumbags because they're promoting gay porn in schools I mean I can't look I spent I spent some time on the podcast A-lib series which things for all lawyers are bad

And so I can't fight the charges too aggressively. Right. And they're basically organized crime crew. Yeah. Yeah. I like this question on the side. Can lawyers join the mafia? They're the one group who can't.

Yeah, they actually, they interview on campus. You would need to have an Italian lawyer first. It's never been done. Yeah, no. Tom Hagan got his job. You know, he summered there between two, two L and three L. and then he just went to work for the Corleone's. You got to.

That's nice, man. I like this answer from Italian princess. It just says, yeah, sometimes lawyers work for families. Italian princess is a great name. If she's not qualified to answer, who is? Okay, I'm moving on. Yeah. There was a rabbit hole, by the way, question in the sidebar

where they're like, how do you get in the mafia in Ghana or something? And I was like, all right. That could be 50 minutes. easily. Yeah. We can't click on all those. It's not funny. It's just good information for people.

Here's a question. Is it illegal to wear a robe on a plane? I've never seen someone wear a robe on a plane. Neither have I. Therefore, logically, it must be against the law. I don't know why else. Because they're quite comfortable. I've seen Buddhist monks on airplanes.

They're basically wearing robes. I have. Yeah, well, yeah, they don't just hang out in the lobby of the airport. Oh. They got places to be, Alex. That makes sense. There's a fantastic related questions. Why did humans stop wearing robes?

Trousers are so oppressing. Did you write that, Alex? I did not write it, but I do amplify their voice and understand their plaint. They're complaint. Alex? Their complaint. They're plaint. I woke up at five in the morning because my cat decided it was daytime.

Alex, have you ever thought about being a kilt guy? Oh, yeah. Well, first of all, I want to know why you asked that. Because you seem like you might have thought about it. Because it seems like it would be quite unoppressive. Yes. That seems to, like, I thought that that was a very logical follow-up. To an anti-pants screed.

Well, here's the thing. Anyone who watches the YouTube knows this is how I sit. Oh, right. Wegg's open. Sort of cock out. The mouse has left the house. The mouse has escaped the lab. so to speak, if I were to be in a kilt.

Yeah. Now, there's an answer by a guy who has a picture of the dude in his post. So that's kind of interesting. This is on, is it illegal to wear ropes on a plane? I think if you are not self-supportive, your mom's rules trump whatever is legal or illegal. What? Just to repeat. Your mom's rules.

If you are not self-supportive, your mom's rules trump whatever is legal. or illegal. Charles, when you're in court, do you ever bring up mom's law? No, though it is a good, it is a good guide, you know, it was like a mnemonic isn't the right word, but a good heuristic for studying for the ethics exam that you actually have to take is, like, would this answer embarrass you if your mom found out? Oh, that's a good rule. Yeah. You know, like, and the fact is there are answers that are within the ethical guidelines that would also embarrass your mom.

But it is a sort of good way of thinking about a lot of those questions. Your Honor, I was in the clean plate club. Followed all the rules. I'd like to take out my first witness, your dog. Now, I've heard you've eaten all of the spaghetti that Alex dropped on the floor. It's for a murder trial. His plate was clean, but he cheated, Your Honor. He was hungry for more.

I'm going back to this answer here because we can get to the picture yet. If she doesn't want her son bringing shame on the family by wearing a bathrobe on a plane, you have to go along with her rules. But as soon as you are a self-supportive adult, you get to do stuff like this. you go to the store to get half and half for your white Russians in a bathrobe too. It's one of the privileges of adulthood, yours to claim. Wow. Okay, so that was a logical use of the dude there, I guess so.

Yeah. Is that he was by his own rules? What are the legal rules? He lives by his own rules. I feel like the robe question really just comes down to what you got underneath it. Yeah. If you're going to just no clothes under the robe, that's probably not allowed. What kind of mouse are you packing?

Did they take the robe off at TSA? That's what I want to know. That would be very funny. That would be really funny if like it's all you wore to the airport and they're just like, we're going to need you to send that through. Open that up. Ever since the penis bomber of 2004, we all have to show our penises at the airport. Or they just take the belt. Like they like you keep the robe on, but they take the furry belt.

Now I'm about to touch your mouse with the back of my hand. Have you guys ever had to have been taken aside for a full-on butt pat down? We've got it. Jeremy has. They got my ass. Anti-Semitism is real? Yeah. Thank you to Zorod for finally fixing the issue of me getting pulled over at the airport.

They started a committee for this. Yeah, they touched me all over and they apologized. And they do the like, sorry, I'm not going to touch your penis thing. They gave his mouse a cookie. And they touch your penis. Sorry, not sorry. And then you react normally in someone. someone yells gun and it's a tragedy.

I ask for a glass of milk. You can, but I'm getting a little thirsty. So, yeah, I think what I'm hearing is it's not illegal to wear a rope on a plane. I haven't heard anything like that. If you do have to get through security, I think we've logicted out here. Depends on what country you're in. I've seen pajamas. I've never seen a robe.

Yeah. You know, like on a red eye flight, I've seen people show up at the airport in the... Do people wear a robes? is the way they used to. I feel they're somewhat dated at this point. This country has gone to hell. Yeah. I went through...

Democrats. I went through a phase where I liked having the robe in the house. Really? Speak on that. Yeah. No, it was in my 20s and I didn't have like a fancy one,

but it was just like, it was like a casual thing to just get a little warmer. Did you have matching slippers? Uh, no. Charles? What a shame. Where were the?

slippers. No, it was it was inspired by kimono patterning but probably purchased for like $8. Sure. You know what I mean? So it was just it was just a very light cloth robe. Now Charles, I have a question. When you're at court and it's Halloween and what if you want to get dressed up, I don't know, as like a judge. Okay. This is good. Would that be frowned upon or would people go, ha ha, happy Halloween. I wish it were the latter. But this is not a, this is not a profession that in certain fora is willing to let the, let the mask drop at all. And so I think, I think if you tried to walk into courtroom in a judge's robe, most judges who are incredibly self-important.

once they get up on the bench would go absolutely fucking ballistic. Do they do a lot of pranks the judges? They do judge pranks a lot. Yeah, yeah, where they're like, if you talk back to me one more time, night in jail. Oh, really? And then after the night in jail, he was like, wait, they took you? Bayliff, don't you know when I'm kidding? This shit sucks.

That shit sucks so bad. Sometimes they fight with the gavels. Oh, that sounds fun. A little lark. That's why I couldn't be a judge because I'm going to swing that thing. Yeah. Oh, you got to. Yeah.

I mean, the level of gavel use in a real courtroom is disappointing. That sucks. And the level of humor is really shame. Yeah. Because it's like an audience that is, it's like so little of it is funny at all. by both design and context. You mean just because of the crime. Yeah, the crime.

Sure. And the threat of punishment. The crippling injury. You know, whatever brought you there. So, but people do sometimes try to be funny. And so the bar is really low. And so you'll get some juice out of some really, really lame. So you can get big laughs at court is what you're saying.

You can. If you bring them in. You know, it's very, it's very, it's very, very crusty rule. Okay. Like it can't be at the expense of the defendant. It's got to be someone who has some dignity. Okay.

You got to punch up. And I imagine you can get like one big laugh. And then after that, they're like, that's enough. Yeah. Yeah. You don't want to push it. You know, go up with your tight five for your closing. Yeah.

You don't want to be like, yeah, I mean, every so often I want to kill my wife too, but I don't. Who hasn't thought about this? Yeah. That's enough joking at this treason trial for the president. Okay, well. There's a damn Cheeto in the White House. Apparently this question had to originally had a story attached to it when it was posted like 11 years ago about like this guy fighting with his mom.

But it is lost to time. Okay, so that's where the mom's rules come in. Yeah. All right. Well, that's a spanned. A cool romance. Hit that button. These are our questions of love.

And again, this is legal advice. How can I as a man avoid women with tattoos and criminal record? Pause. Pause on that. Why are you avoiding women? I don't know about all that. I think a lot of women with tattoos don't have criminal records, I would say. I would say most.

Now, if you are not watching the video, Claire is covered in tattoos. He's really, I respect the fact that he's allowing for either. one. Yeah. Yeah, it's in either or. Have you ever committed a crime? Yeah, but I've never gotten caught. Oh, yeah, that's fine.

Well, that's what matters. Because otherwise it's on your permanent record. Oh, my God. I got nothing on my record. Clean slate. That goes school to school. Clean slate club. Clean slate club.

Can't send me to jail. I'm in the clean slate club. Andrea Schultz says, ask her if there are issues that are important to you in a potential mate ask questions. So, like, on your date, you should be like, by the way, have you ever been convicted of a crime? And like how bad was it?

Also, do you have a scorpion on your shoulder? Was it a cool crime or a bad crime? If you like killed your ex, I don't want to date you. I have a scorpion on my shoulder. I legitimately did not know that. I was given suggestion by Claire there. That's really crazy. That wasn't even facing the camera.

That's really nuts. That was because Claire had to do that gang initiation. Yeah, when she was the lawyer for the yakazzo. To perform it over the eight, they make you get a tattoo of a scorpion. Wow. Tattoo and criminal record. Yeah, I don't think most of the women I've met with tattoos have a criminal record. Has anyone here ever dated a criminal?

No. Claire, you ever dated a career? Yeah. Now, Jeremy and I married our high school girlfriend, so we're out. Yeah, the tone of voice there was how much time do you have? We have a lot of time, Claire. Who's your worst criminal you've dated? Don't say gerbils.

Greta Gerbils. I think probably the one that you guys both know. I don't know if he's a criminal. I don't know if he's ever been arrested. No, no. Can you don't, I don't want to make you have to edit. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I don't know who that is. Because he definitely smoked crack. But I don't think. I think he got arrested for him. I will bleep that name. But I wouldn't doubt that he had been arrested. And I'm dating someone now who has been in jail. Ooh, crime contest.

In Japan? That's a scary place to go to jail. That's, okay. That case is complicated. That's why I had to do the yakuza. Yeah. Something about his... Innocent situation over there.

His friend found weed and then had weed on him. This was Paul McCartney. Yes. Claire's dating Paul McCartney. She's bearing him in other chast. That would be such a funny way to describe that you're dating Paul McCartney. Yeah, my friend got into a little trouble in Japan for weed. Let's say he's a band on the run.

Are lawyers allowed to have criminal records? It's complicated. No, I mean, you have to, when you, first get admitted to the bar and in every state you try to get admitted to the bar you do have to like pass and like an ethics and background check and so you have to disclose everything and so you can still get admitted to the bar if you have a criminal record but if you have a criminal record and don't disclose it during the process then they will almost certainly deny you for or lack of integrity.

Whereas if you are like, I did this, I served these years, I served my debt to society, I regret it, and here are the reasons why I've rehabilitated myself, you can get admitted to the bar. And then once you're a lawyer, certain things will get your law license, suspended or taken away,

but you can probably drive drunk at least once. Sure, you're also part of an organized crime scheme. Yeah. I mean, driving drunk is just industry standard from what I understand. I think lawyers would be better if they were criminals because then they would know

what it's like. You want to have a criminal lawyer. I understand where my client is coming from as I am the Long Island Strangler. Alex shushing me to get to his impression. Like, yeah, whatever, dude. I have a voice I'm doing. Just my voice of loud Long Island Strangler.

As someone who struggles with impulse control myself. The Long Island Strangler was an ex-cop himself. That's right. A public servant. A lot of ex-cops are breaking the law, huh? Breaking the law. Breaking the law.

Well, they know it. There was, kidding aside, there was like a Long Island serial killer that for many, many years who I think people think is now an ex-cop. I'm not sure if they ever figured that out. All joking aside, be careful when walking around Long Island.

And we like to make a message about this every week. Be careful out there. You're not safe in Massapiqua. You're not. I can name all sorts of places. If you're at Dead Seal Beach, watch over your shoulder. You might run into my mother-in-law. You should have considered yourself warned already.

We do have that text at the start of the episode. You're a Dead Seal Beach. I wonder what could go wrong here. Everything seemed like it was A-OK. Much worse at Dead Human Beach, to be fair. You guys got to rename these beaches. Can I tell you who seems like an ex-cop, by the way? Please.

Scroll back up to Andrea Schultz, who said a criminal record is public. No, no, no, it's in the answer. A criminal record is public. If you know her name, you can investigate for yourself. That sounds like cop behavior. Do you know how many jurisdictions there are and how actually impossible it is to figure out of someone?

She is someone who has spent like the last week running searches in the flock database. Now it does say she is a customer service rep. He's a car dealer, grocery checker. artist, crafter, reader and cook. Reader and crook, more like. Lock her up. Oh, my gosh. There's also an answer from an author here.

C.S. Friedman, which is a great author. B.F.C.S. Lewis at home. She says, that first part's a good question. It's not like tattoos are visible or anything. Woo! Wow. And she's a freaking author. She larks. Yeah!

That's awesome. Oh, she's... Whoa. We're on Alien Shores.com. with CSFriedman.com. That's her book. Just joking. They're called Alien Shores.

They're about their sci-fi books. Alex honestly probably has read these. It does seem exactly like the kind of thing I would read. Such book that's called aliens or whatever. It's been reviewed by Locus. So people are talking about it. It's in the running for the, uh, the big award or whatever. The Hugo?

The Lucas. Okay. Well, very cool stuff. Let's get out of here. You can, you can definitely understand her perspective on this as she, He lives in the area known as Nudistan. No one could possibly cover a tattoo with clothing.

We didn't even know about Claire's scorpion tattoo. She hides it with her suggestion. Okay, here's another question. My husband cried after breaking his back in a car accident. I am no longer attracted to him because of this. Should I divorce him? Oh, baby! Yeah, dump his ass.

Dump his ass. He's crying ass. Leave him on the car. I think this is a troll. I think I looked this one up already. Troll alert. But I guess, I mean, this is a legal question about divorce. Yes.

Will there be repercussions for divorcing your pussy husband with his broke back and his broke ass? I mean, in heaven. Oh, sure. But under man's law. Under man's law. I mean, it's not like he can chase you anymore. No, no. And he's going to have to pay.

And I mean, look, what it says in your vows is in sickness and in health. and she's not upset about the breaking his back. It doesn't say, like, if you completely lose face. You know, I'm never, you don't, my wife will never see me cry. Right. Right. Well, no, of course not. I mean, your time in your professional career has taught you the importance of saving face.

That's right. Are vows legal? Does that count it? That's not legal, though, is it? It's not binding. Jeremy's been cheating a lot. I really have. My wife's really sick.

Yeah. He's nuts for pussy. Dating a criminal. I really feel like your, uh, your distance from your bar mitzvah makes them no longer binding. You're like I have ceased to care about any of this. They put me in that chair. It was all up and down from then. I live without a code.

I'm a Ronan. Now, I haven't read this answer, but the top response is, from Robert Honeycutt, and that is a good name. Okay, read it. Hi, I'm Robert Honeycut. Hi, Robert. You are no longer attracted because he broke his back or that he cried, which is it? Well, actually, it doesn't matter.

Neither of these is actually a moral reason to divorce a husband with whom you took a vow of till death do us part. If he had committed adultery or infidelity, I could understand. This, I don't. The problem is not your husband. You are the problem. You are the exact kind of cruel, vicious and stupid woman that no man... That clearly says viscous. That means thick.

You are a thick woman. You are a thick woman. And you have no moral code. This is where, you know, this is like, you know, the compliment, neg compliment. Right. You know, like... Compliment sandwich. Well, he's not done putting a curse on her yet.

So you're a viscous and stupid woman that no man should ever marry. Whoa, be to any man that takes you in. because you have a heart of stone. By all means get divorced. You will impart much more suffering to him by maintaining your presence. That is your answer. Robert Honeycutt.

Honeycutt. Honeycutt. Okay, question. What if your husband breaks his back in a car accident and cries because he's on the way to cheat on you? Can you then break up with him or is that frowned upon?

He's a cheating pussy. Yeah, exactly. Claire, I have a question for you. Uh-oh. You have to choose. And I come to this. Well, actually, no, I think we, okay. So you have a choice.

I've never think Claire so focused. You always have a choice. You have a choice between the crying invalid or Robert Honeycutt who talks like that all the time. He seems cool. I go, honestly, honeycutt. He's confident. He seems like a cool guy. But actually, no, Honeycutt feels a little kind of like,

do you guys ever see Boardwalk Empire? Oh, hell yeah. First season, maybe the second. Michael Shannon. Michael Shannon character where he sort of self-flagellates. That could be kind of interesting to walk in on, but I don't know. Every guy I've ever been with is a big pussy who cries a lot.

This is the magic of being polly, is that you could just date both of these. guys. Yeah, exactly. You know he's got that country mouse down there. Shut up. All right.

My boy's got a rat. He's got a rat king. He's got several penises tied together. He's all mixed up. Like they're one penis. Looking like a Celtic tattoo. Thank you for visualizing that for me.

Do you want me to read another question? Let's do our listener question and get out of here. Let me make sure that we're... I'm deluding myself that I can get to work at 5. I guess we actually can't do that yet. No. We haven't done it enough time. Let's do one more question. I'm fucked.

That's fine. I don't care. Do permitted knowledge. You set this up poorly. You pledged yourself. You did play yourself. Is there a link between weed and ghosts? Hey, I didn't say it.

Charles, you're a lawyer. Legally? Yeah. Yeah, they're allowed to both purchase and sell in... Nice. But only in limited quantities. State by state. If you smell a ghost on a...

If you're a cop and you smell a ghost on someone, you can search their car. Yeah. Yeah. It's allowed. Yeah, you can... But you have to use a black light. Often if you can smell a ghost, it's already too late for you, I've found. And my research.

That's a bad sign spiritually. I'd hate to be a stinky ghost. Weed is a controlled substance, all joking aside. I don't think ghosts really operate in that same kind as fear. Having experimented myself as a... With both. City mouse, I've found that it does often make me more scared, which makes me think more of ghosts,

and ghosts are given power over you when you lend them that opening in your mind. So I would say that they are inextricably tied. I don't smoke weed, but I don't smoke weed, but I have been dead the whole time. Oh, there you go. Expens why I can see you. You should try smoking weed. Hey, you got nothing to wait for.

Are you from New Orleans? Is that why you like them? I'm not. I'm from Queens. I was a weird kid. I'm a weird adult. And I just chose a couple of teams because I like their logos.

Sure. That's how I picked a reason as any. I really liked the abelam. I thought they had a little. Me too. I used to have an avalanche jersey as a kid. And the San Jose sharks as well because they had a shark and it was biting a hockey stick. That's pretty cool.

Hockey logos are sick. Be the shark. I was a winged wheel. That was I was a Red Wings fan. Oh. I was an NHL guy. And so I spent a lot of years hating the abs. Oh, you did not say that.

Because of Claude Lemieux. I can't believe I shook his rigging me. I liked Patrick Rois because he was a goalie who would beat people up. Yeah. Which I thought was cool. Yep. He was like, fuck you, I'm a goalie. And he was from like Quebec.

So he would like, you could just imagine that horrible accent threatening you. It's so much severity there. I'm kind of a sports ball guy, but I still like sharks. You like sharks more than you like sports, really. Yeah, they're, um, the great fish. You're like, throw them in there. Yeah, well, yeah, good. I thought I was going to watch the sharks today.

I've just watched a bunch of guys. These are all human men. I guess I ask about New Orleans because it's a very ghost-heavy place. It is. And also there are very many, a lot of the controlled substances used there as well. It was big. Very true. I had absence there.

Well, that's allowed. Also, Alistair Crowley loved that. Oh, yeah. And that's why it's probably down there. And it's probably why you were having it. Now, we do have an answer by anonymous here. Please. On the link between we and ghosts.

He says, context, I smoke weed, but not often, a couple times a month at max. At my house, we have all. always had paranormal activity. This year it's been happening more. What we know is that there was a suicide in our back garden. For the first time in four years of smoking, I have heard a man speak to me as I'm

falling asleep. Okay. I don't know what he is saying, but I know it's a man. I love the idea that somebody's talking to you when you're going to sleep and you're just like, whatever. I am so beat. I need my eight hours. Why can't this be a woman? I don't care enough about this to find out what you're saying.

I know you're a man. People are going to think I'm gay. Did you imagine how frustrated that fucking ghost is? I know. The ghost is like, hey, hey, come on. This guy doesn't care about me. I know you hear me. You're high as hell, son.

I need you to get in touch with my wife. You got unfinished business and the only one who can hear it is this damn stoner. The last sentence is this has happened four times now, two of which were when I haven't even smoked, for a week, if not more. If I have smoked, sometimes get the feeling like someone is touching me. When I was drawing, it felt like someone was massaging my shoulders. It only happens in my house.

I have smoked when out camping friends, staying alone in a cabin. You know who would be a great person to ask this question is Shaggy from Scooby-Doo. Oh. Perfect guy. I mean, there'd be a lot of good questions that's Shaggy. Kind of evergreen. Really any question. He's just a cool guy.

Ask about the woman who left her hugger. for being at a car accident. He's like, it wasn't me. I was immediately, I thought he was going to, it wasn't me. I did have to say, I did have to say from Scooby-Doo because I do that's where your head was going to go. He's going to do an accent that we can't take back. But now we can focus on the important thing,

which is this ghost is gay as hell. The ghost is touching him when he's drawing. I think that's sweet. He's trying to rub your shoulders. That ghost is after. Maybe you're stressed out. Maybe you should maybe be, check out what's going on with this ghost. sweetie. My sweetheart.

Read the rest of this. We have cases of my cat looking at nothing for a period of time. That's just a cat. They always do that. They'd be doing that. Jeremy of cats doing that right now. He's asleep. Well, he's looking at the back of his eyelids.

To leave him be. Like at the ceiling as she is lying on me, like she's following something. The dog barks at corners of the room, which isn't normal for him. I've heard talking, stuff breaking, items moving in front of us. But I don't always sense. the presence. It's like when I smoke weed, I'm more in tune with it. I can feel someone there. The same night I was drawing when making a cup of the it felt like someone was... I think I was cup of tea. Oh, okay.

But he wrote a cup of the... Young people call tea the it. I think it's cup of the, but it's cup of tea. It's giving the it. felt like someone was sitting in the chair to my right watching me. It's odd and everyone has their opinions, but I do think I'm more aware of them when I'm high, but I know people will say it's paranoia. I have to say things used to happen before I started smoking, so I do believe in spirits, but lately it's just been different. Where do you live? Because this is just what it sounds like to live in New York City, I feel like.

I hear people talking and moving things all the time. Okay, but do you- It sounds like there's a podcast upstairs. Do you see stuff breaking in front of you? No. This sounds like an angry ghost. I mean, my wife breaks pretty much everything that we have, but that's not a ghost, really. Well, she's always high.

She is always high, it's true. So that might have something to do with it. I feel like if you're hearing the guy in your house, but you don't hear it camping, there's a guy in your walls. Yeah, probably. Oh, you're being... It's the candy man or whatever.

Yeah. The candy man or, what was I saying? The Korean movie, you're being parasited. Oh, I think he'd be parisite. There's a guy living in your house. There's a family living in your house because you're a wealthy man. Every night before he goes to sleep, the guy's like, do you mind if I grab an ice pop out of the freezer?

And he just passes out. I don't even know what you're saying, man. It's a fucking high. I'm trying to draw. You'll rub his shoulders just feel some human touch. Every time I draw, I feel a ghost theragunning me. It's sad, but it's true. That was a great answer.

I love the ghost questions. I know. That's the only answer on this. Was that an answer or was that the question? No, that was actually just the context. for the question. Yeah, that's what I thought. All of it followed after a context colon.

Yeah, so there's actually no answers on this. That was from the person asking the question five years ago. An answer from the hacker group Anonymous. Yeah, so we'll never know. We'll never know what happened, what the link is between weed and ghosts, but clearly it's strong. We know it's gay. Shut up. That's my secret cap.

Let me have one more question. Slam the discourse button. These are politics questions. Would you, sorry, who would you trust more, a woke Democrat or a gang member? I didn't say it. You did say it, though. You didn't say it. Wow.

To me, they're basically the same damn thing. Oh. This is legal advice. I'm a woke gang member, actually. Give me your pronouns. on the gun at them. This is a sketch. Guys, we've walked in on a sketch.

It's surely been done. I know woke mafia has been done by 10 million people. That's pretty good. Everyone get down on the ground. Not you. I could see you're struggling. I'm not an aim list or anything.

You can just sit in that chair right there. Give me all your money or pay what you can. Donation based. Is the woke mafia called the God person. Come on now. It's just being done. Folks, it's a podcast. All right.

Well, anyway, this is about Democrats. Yeah. Who's just more woke Democrat or a gang member? We have an answer from a... To save my life, I would say a gang member. Sure. That's honestly true. You're drowning and someone kneels.

Yeah. You know they're fucking real. Yeah. It's the one thing that you... Because you're in a gang with them. If I'm in a gang with them, then they're going to help me out because we're brothers. They ride with you and they die with you.

Also, they've been, you know, jumped in or sexed in so you know that they've shared trauma. Claire can do the blood hands. So that'll be helpful. Go ahead and do that on the camera. Do you have stigmata? You're hiding that with your scorpion tattoo. Yeah, she just did the blood hands again.

Okay, read this from Francis Davis. This is a former aerospace propulsion engineer. I'm listening. And Francis says, I'm intrigued by this question. You too, Francis. Do you believe that convicted felons have political affiliations? Do you presume that criminal? vote. You think the local

drug dealers support one party over another, to quote one of my program managers, put down the crack pipe. Let's wait, hold on. Legal intervention here, that is probably a hostile work environment. Yeah, you probably shouldn't say stuff like that at

work. Do not say that to your direct reports. What kind of satellites are you guys making over there? I'll do, this is the answer more. I'll do the correspondent from the Streaker song. From inside the Super Max prison, quote, pardon me

Mr. Mass murderer and super villain. What do you think of the governor's policy on crime? We all have Heath Ledger's The Joker respond with George Carlin's punchline. We appreciate how the governor is making the streets safer for the business criminal. Many of us

aspire to enter business crime so the state can have a better class of criminal. And again, that's a quote from the Joker. I think it's actually the Joker quoting George Carlin. Yeah. Fuck. It's hard enough to read.

I want to go in the plane, not on the plane. My wife. How do you think I passed this bar? They're classic Joker quotes. Yeah. I think every Quora answer should end with the Joker quote. Yeah, well, the Joker again, quoting George Carlin. He reveals truths about society.

It's a big club. You're not in it. There are eight words you can't say on television. The first word, of course, is the bat. You're not allowed to say it. I am never getting on a spaceship if this is the quality of our aerosmith engineering. I am going to stick to cars and walking. They're not good with words.

They're numbers, guys. True. I wouldn't worry about it. They're a bunch of jocks. Get on the spaceship, Charles. Yeah, I don't know. don't really know what his point was, which I guess it's just that criminals hate law and order, and so you can't trust them.

I have a, this is unrelated, but just Quora update that I've just noticed. Something looked weird to me on their related questions earlier, but I was like, I wonder have they updated the website or something, because every now and then they do that. And I've noticed they've added views to the questions. That's new, right? Viewcast. I don't like that, really. I don't either.

It kind of feels like all of the big websites like YouTube and. Quora, and those are the two main ones, are changing the definitions of views to make people feel less alone when they completely bomb out there. Right. Yeah. To make it feel like your podcast is more successful than it is. They've changed the way views work on YouTube. Yeah,

like they told Francis Davis, hey, man, you got 40 views on your nonsense answer on this Quora. That was always there, I think. Hang in there. I like that you can see there's 567 views on two gang members love women. But no. No answers.

No one knows. Do gang members love women? Well, there's an Omerta, so no one is going to answer the question. Damn. It's just nice to think about. I know pirates love women. They'll have booty. Yeah.

Hey, Jeremy, you're arrested. Oh, no. You're fired and arrested. Oh, no. Unfortunately, you're going to jail. Alex keeps telling me to put down the crack pipe. I'm worried about you. Hey, I should have said that to that boyfriend.

friend I have. Whose name will be bleeped. It's bleeped. You'll never know who it was. It was Paul McCartney. It's the one with the blue lips twitching. All blue lips. So the one, the question right under that, though, is fascinating.

Because it's why do gangs punish members who attempt to leave the gang? Eight answers. I think they're predictable. 153.1,000 views. People are viewing it. Which means that a lot of gang members are like, oh, I get it. I need to like crowd source. About 153,000 people saw it and did an answer.

Before I leave the Bloods, I need to go on Quora and just make sure it's okay. That's what I mean. They're like, oh, now I see why they were upset. Oh, right. I'll just tell them I'll stay. Oh, and you're saying they'll hurt me if I leave. Yeah. Okay, I'm not going to leave that.

But the question isn't what, how do gang's punish members? who tempts it's why. No, no, no. They're insecure. Right, but he's like, oh, I have their secrets. Yeah. I have their, I've hurt their feelings by leaving. Yeah.

Their club. I guess that would be. I get it, man. Somebody left the Discord I was in recently and I was like, I got to chop this guy's fingers off. Yeah, it's really hard. I got to think beyond myself. Think about their needs. Right.

The gang. Yeah, the gang. I was caught in a vortex of self and I apologize to my. Sometimes I feel like being in a gang is a lot of emotional labor. I love you guys. Okay, let's do a listener question. We trust the woke Democrats or whatever. Yeah, we back the blue politically.

Let's not look at Alex's Bank of America stuff. Go ahead and check my statement. All right, go to hit the button. You can send in your Quora style questions to the show and we will read them on air. Just send your questions to Quarators at Gmail. dot com, try to keep your question under 30 seconds, and this is our segment. Is that okay? Is that okay?

We have not heard this before. Hi, Quaraders. I am circumcised, and sometimes when I am sitting down or walking around, my guy will roll back into myself. Is this what being uncircumcised feels like? It's very uncomfortable. Thank you. No, that's all you, dog.

It's on you. You don't roll back into itself? How are you getting rolled back? What is it prehensile? I am thinking of like a fruit by the foot situation. Is that what we're all thinking of? Like a slap bracelet or a scared turtle? It's more like a push pop.

I got that Uzimaki dick. You want your mouse to be free of the lab. All right. So keep that guy out. Keep him clean. Keep your critter loose. Give him kisses and inject him with poison. What was the question?

If you're circumcised, is it supposed to roll up like that? I don't know. I cannot speak on that. I have no idea what that means. It's supposed to roll up like that. Yeah, dude. This guy's dick must be giant. It's caught by its own gravity.

It's like one of those when bugs bun, he flips the guy's cummer bun. Right. And like the whole tuxed on front. I hate it when people do that to my dick. Seriously, don't do that to do not flick my penis and make it roll up. Don't touch it. Well,

thank you for writing in. I think I think Jeremy's right. I think it is a push-pop situation. I think so. So good luck with that. Yeah, keep that. Just wash it.

Go to a doctor. Go ahead and wash it. Go to the lawyer. This is legal advice. With no further ado, that's been the episode. Charles, thank you. Thank you so much for coming on. Thank you for having me.

I appreciate it. Where can our listeners go to find you at Home and Abroad? No Homework. Is it no homework website, a free Patreon? City Saint, Country Saint. Just Google that and it'll come up. This regard the mouse results. Yeah.

Yeah. I am U-Garles, U-G-A-R-L-E-S, or Senator Lemon Gogert, probably easier to remember. on blue sky. And I am in a death match with Josh Borman to be on as many podcasts in 2020. I don't think that's going to happen. How many have you got? Because Josh has a lot of them.

Yeah, I'm up two as of the time. You have two more than him? I do. Okay. Wow, that's impressive because he does a lot of podcasts. No, yeah, no. I'm at I'm at, I think, 47. Jesus Christ.

He just shows up at my house sometimes. Yeah, no, I know. Well, I do ask him to be there. No, he just shows up. We recorded a few that you weren't even here for. I didn't know what to do. He had a gun. So I didn't put it out.

I would know about that. Claire's on one. But I don't talk about it. I think it's unseemly to like bring up the numbers. It'll be what it is at the end of the year. And, but if you want to have me on, I will almost certainly do your podcast. He will. He's trying to juice this number.

He will not speak of. That's right. Well, he said 47. He said it. I said it because I was asked. It was rude of us to ask him. No, I wanted to know. We should apologize.

What's your body count? This is a video podcast. We ask all of our guests how many people they've fucked. I will never answer that. It's 47. Answer me. It rolls up into my body. That is my absolute fucking favorite viral video.

The dark one. No, the skeleton in the Home Depot. where he's like harassing some kid with the skeleton. And I don't remember the joke. But it was like, it was a punny joke. He's like asking this kid and the kid like is just laughing. Yeah. Right.

That's good. I think I've seen this one. You know Batman does that too. Yeah. Alex was talking about the viral video of the Dark Night from 2009. This is viral video. It's like three hours long. It was kind of a viral video.

It was like the most viral video that year, I think. We had to end this podcast. Yes. If you would like more. more of our show. Good news for you. There's a second episode on Patreon.com slash Quaraders.

And you are, well, if you have stayed, I think you might enjoy those episodes. They're quite fun. We go on other websites. They are. I found a lot of good stuff for this week. We click around.

Other websites? Yeah. We go all over the damn web. I'm not crazy about it, but. If you're open to such things, I suggest you check that out. Check it out. Patreon.com slash corridors.

and until next week, as always, dear listener, question everything. Bye-bye. Bye. Thank you.