Quorators - Quora iTunes Reviews w/ Donovan Eyre

Episode Date: January 26, 2026

Comedians Clare O'Kane, Alex Ptak, and Jeremy Kaplowitz explore the mysterious land of Quora.com to answer life's questions. This week's iTUNE REVIEWS include: Quora taken over by CCP The owner of his dog digs a hole on his owner's grave Ghost hunters I'm not a ghost hunter --- Check out Dono's Twitch stream @ twitch.tv/donohell Get even more Quorators when you support the show @ patreon.com/quorators Send quoras and qommunicate on our discord discord.gg/7pPYuKuYCr Watch the show @ youtube.com/@quorators

Okay, we're recording, we're recording, we're recording, we're recording. Nice. Finally, I can create. One, two. Every fucking day I show up to set and I get ready to film Quarators. The set's my apartment. Surrounded by clowns. Might as well put a tent up around Jeremy's apartment where the clowns live.

That's right. Did the show start? Is this the show? It can be. Hey, get out the whip because lions are in there. Depends on how much I want to edit this out, really, in the next few days. That's what I'm going to stand to. Maybe edit a lion behind a cage so the lion tamer doesn't get eaten.

Claire, not to call you out, you say, yeah, but have you ever listened to an episode of Quarriors? I'm going to go ahead and say. This sounds like a call out to me. I don't know what else to call this. Oh, no, it cut out. I guess you'll never hear my answer. I don't know why you would listen to it.

It's not really a call out. It would be weird. I lived it. Yeah, exactly. I am mostly listening anyway. Yeah, well, fair enough. But I did want to chime in and say I'm not like you're a regular clown. I'm an avant-garde clown.

Nice. Wow, that's really cool. L.A. clown. The only time I listen to an episode of Quarters is if I'm on paternity leave for two months. I want to be like, are they saying shit about me on there? are they undermining my authority as a as a patriarch and father figure on the podcast did we undermine alex's authority wantonly with wanton abandon you did i think you did press a lot of the wrong buttons yeah yeah because it's really hard to press them hit the red one oh

that's a good one all right donno don't press the button wait get past him and donno donno hit the It's the show we started the show. I'm doing the dance. Sometimes the guest doesn't dance, and I was like, I gotta dance. I'm doing the Jersey Shore thing. You've been on the podcast. Yeah, but I don't remember if I danced. I was really nervous because we were in a studio.

It was so fucking hot. Things were pretty fucking legit back then. It was a bit of a box. It was. It was a closet. Folks, welcome back to the Quarators Podcast. america's premier quora-based podcast i am your host and patriarch alex respect me and here with my many other co-hosts that we know and love everyone's here today we have

the uh loyal jester jeremy kaplowitz and the people's joker clara kane Uh-huh, honey. We're all just jokers to you, huh? You really do think we're just clouds of some sort. Jeremy, silence. I'm lifting my pants up and revealing my butt at you. Oh, you're lewd tactics.

You're owned. You're the only one who can speak truth to me. God damn, do I respect that. But you know what else I respect is this great guest who we've got in on the show today, blowing in from the Windy City. No, it's not just the hot air coming in through your car radiator. It's Donovan Air in from the Radio Free Tobacco Podcast.

Uh-huh, honey. Also, they're hitting all the buttons, and it's not me this time. Some of the times it will be me, but not all of them. It's kind of fun to have like a stinger, the uh-huh, honey, for each person. Because you're like, uh-huh, honey, Donovan is on the show. Yeah, it's good. Honey, honey, there's news. I've been thinking to maybe have some more catchphrases.

we say, like, maybe I say, I don't think so honey more often. That's famously a different podcast catchphrase. Or maybe I could say stuff like, you know what my favorite murder is, or like, you know, just something that's trending right now. You could call her daddy.

Wait, so I'm a free tote bag, but also now I'm a streamer. Oh, right. I'm sorry for disrespecting you. I didn't hear about this. It's okay. It's embarrassing to tell people that I'm 34 and I started a stream. Oh, okay.

We don't have to. No, I want to plug it. Okay. Put it in day-to-day life. I've had a podcast for eight years, and it's enough to be like, oh, I do a podcast when I meet somebody new, but now I'm like, I do a Twitch stream. I double down. And it's twitch.tv slash Don O'Hell, and I'm pointing at the camera.

And Jeremy's been on, and you can see the VOD with Jeremy. Wow. I was on it. I know that guy. We did watch the Cavemen show. Claire, you ever watch the Cavemen TV show? Is that the show about the guys from the commercial? Yeah.

That's right, with Nick Kroll. I have not seen it. Alex banned me from talking about it on this podcast sometime in the first few months of it. Oh, yeah, I forgot. Because I talked about it a little bit too much, apparently. It came up too much for a thing that no one in the world has seen. I've seen it. I texted Alex to invite you on the stream, and I mentioned cavemen, and you got mad.

Yeah. Well, I thought Jeremy was putting you up to it and undermining me from afar. which is the patriarch makes my fist curl into a hardened rock. Oh, he's going Arthur mode. Is Claire the matriarch of the podcast? Yes, Claire is my queen. That's what I thought.

We have a political alliance. Am I allowed to talk about when I played soccer with Nick Kroll? Did I already talk about that? You have not talked about this and you're certainly allowed to. Oh, there's a fucking cat over there? No, don't talk about it. You're the cat. Do not talk about the cat. the cat is not on camera claire discuss your nick kroll story no just uh i'm a part of a

sometimes i'm a part of an adult soccer uh league a hollywood league damn it's just really fun really fun no frills and he was on the team once and we played together yeah well a gsm okay man and two claire how how big is this guy's mouth two equally good questions can i say that i signed an nda do not mention the size of my mouth sorry dribble a ball it might have been but somebody wasn't your somebody in my chat maybe somebody sent a recent interview with him where he's like actually caveman was good really he's like it's too much people are afraid to say that stuff He's incorrect.

It's not very good. No, it's quite racist. It's really not good. Well, but at the time. It's racist? Yeah, well, they play with tropes, Clay. You have to understand, this show is about what if cavemen, people were racist against them in the exact same ways people were racist against just black people.

Right. So a lot of it is they're like, it's so hard being a caveman because girls only want to date me because of my huge cock. Yeah. And then. They got slurs. They have cave slurs. Some of it I can't say.

I'll say it. Cro-maga. That's the slur. And they was like, Nick Kroll's like, you said Kroll-Magger. There's a hard R on that. What the hell?

And the original pilot was set in Atlanta and the executives were like, this is too racist. Set it in LA. The pilot is one of the most horrifying things I've ever seen. If the year 2006 was a TV show. Pretty, pretty much.

Could just reach through the screen and choke you with the stuff going on. Alex, have you actually seen it? I haven't, and I've banned everyone from bringing it up to me. I know what we're doing after the show. Donna has several times tried to get me to watch this, and we keep having scheduling issues. I'm saving the last episode for you coming on the show.

My special treat. Can we take one second to do the damn weather report? It's cold. It's ice cold out there. It is ice cold outside here in chilly New York City. I'm freezing my snowballs off. What's the weather like out in L.A., Claire? I wanted to say we got a nice mid-60s ball of haze.

There's a bit of a haze. Oh, yeah, a bit of smog rolling in from the hills. But don't worry, there are a lot of flies outside. Okay, I won't worry. If you're in Los Angeles, don't worry, there are flies outside. That's been the weather report. Let's talk about Quora, as is the goal of our podcast. Hit the Space of the Week button.

I think if we don't start now, we're never going to start. Space of the Week. That's longer than I thought. It's quite long. Put the tail on that. This week, our Space of the Week is a site of the week, and the site is iTunes. iTunes.com.

Have you heard of this iTunes before? Yeah, I love their gift cards. It's one of the best ways to listen to U2's music. I had the U2 iPod. Yo, say, I've heard that old album because it came on the iPod. U2? U2? Oh, I see what you're doing.

You're having a bit of fun. Ah, yes. The jester's laugh. You're doing an Irishman's folly. Dono, are you sort of related to Bono? That's right. That was the inspiration for my name. My dad is a big YouTube fan.

I keep pausing to hear like, oh, Jeremy's trying to get into the conversation. Let's hear him out. And then it's the dumbest thing you've ever heard. Follows like two seconds. Oh, you too.

Just relentlessly. Everyone on their gas fumes shit today. Jeremy is being edgy. I am being iTunes.com. I waited that edge. I know. I got it. I'm plowing us through the segment.

Okay. Okay. We were very lucky. Larry Mullen Jr. One of our listeners has found that the iTunes reviews of Quora itself are quite funny. Yes. And so we've collected several of them to read. The iTunes reviews of Quora?

The iTunes reviews of the app for Quora. Quora has an app. Donna, we are breaking new ground on this podcast three years in. There's a lot of angles that we haven't explored yet. People say, you're going to run out of Quoras. Because we're going to end up on iTunes. I think a second fave pedophile is going to end up with an account on this website, and we'll read his questions.

There's no limit to what we'll do. A shout-out to listener Kushelvali, who sent these in on the Discord. Thank you for finding these. There were more than we could cover all at once, so we've decided to start with the hits here. Okay. This is screenshot number one. December 5th of this year, Quora has been taken over by the CCP Chinese Communist Party.

One star. Quora has been taken over by the CCP Chinese Communist Party and trying to rewrite history of their unsavory past practices and pushing out pro-CCP propaganda. It's a very sad thing. But Quora is no longer trustworthy of any real truthful information. Once it was great, you could get real answers from non-political perspective on any subject via academic research or scientific analysis.

But now that the Chinese Communist Party has invaded and infected and infiltrated an otherwise excellent community, it has lost its once very credible name. Don't bother with Quora. Either they are getting money from the CCP to falsely information. I'm not even reading this wrong. It's too falsely information. Or the Quora community is completely unaware of what is looming within its own ranks. Lots of betrayal here. Lots of.

lots of betrayal here i wish the ccp would disappear of the face of the earth it would be okay if they were to just stay in their own backyard and leave the rest of the world alone but they can't do that they just have to mess with all of us because their own governance is horrible this is again a review for the app for quora um the chinese communist app i do i feel like the app is run better than the desktop website uh it asks for two-factor authentication a lot of time which is somewhat annoying but i know alex would you say your number one employer is the chinese communist party i would say would you say that i would say that is that related to your your answer how great the quora app is and how you have a podcast about it would you say you're a compromat

you know what i see the factors looming that do make this seem a bit convenient on my end but this review is actually there to set up the next review that we have if you'd like to go to that one. Sure, so we're moving on past this one. Yeah, I do think that the CCP has taken over Quora. And it's a very sad thing. And it's a sad thing,

and I wish there were lots of betrayal here. I need to know why they think this. What was that? Because I'm a weekly listener of this show. Thank you. I love Quora Raiders. I'm there with you, the listener. You're one of the people.

people yeah you're not like us on our high horses nothing i hear i'm the patriarch is remotely communist it is mostly you're listening hard enough literally every episode alex praises the chinese communist party right but i do but i'm not like in the website very much i there we sometimes we'll read something about like one of the free love guys that gets a little communist about being like i just wish we could all share clothes or whatever and then that i'm like oh let's hear them out. Maybe that's what they're referring to. I Am A Pizza has all those posts

about how much he loves Chairman Mao. Right. That's because he has a great mouth to eat pizza with, though. It's somewhat unrelated. Chairman Mouth. Chairman Mouth. Chairman Mouth.

Chairman Mouth, another shirt. When are we selling shirts? That's good. Chairman Mouth. I leave the money on the table, and I throw it away. Chairman Mouth is the shirt. jeremy click on the next screenshot okay i'm doing it i can't see the screenshots by the way

also by the way i have to carry them all over from the other screen it's a whole thing okay so the screenshots won't be two screens yeah you'll have to send them to me it's fine we'll figure it all out don't worry about it i'll listen review number two yeah why don't you sit your ass down review number two for the quora apt please respect everyone chinese flag chinese flag chinese flag and this is three stars i can't understand the rules of this software i am a chinese and i saw a man and i saw a man on quora trying to slander chinese history he said that mao zedong colluded with the japanese army i was very angry but i still politely replied to him he sent me more pictures or even no source cry laughing emoji so i wrote a long article

trying to communicate with him however my long post was deleted i didn't give him any abuse so i can't understand actually i would love to say swear now typing those words when i was saying peace and love in my heart please respect everyone thank thank you symbol because the software gave me a good experience besides that ignorant person so i gave three stars and then a bunch of happy three smiling faces this person has really risen above the hate yeah we've lost claire again i'm here i'm here i've lost your your video beautiful face my beautiful face okay where are you it doesn't matter i'm so sorry you think the other reviewer is the guy who responded to him i i don't think this is a personal response to the other thing but i do think there

a lot of anti-chinese people on quora because it is mostly boomers i i think get a lot of ideological programming to do cold war style posting um i legitimately think that it's very demographically divided up that way and uh yeah this guy just had to deal with it but mostly the app's been good so three stars that's great because you can still find out stuff about could Master Chief fight Goku? Which is why a lot of us are on there. That's why I'm on there. Oh yeah. TBH.

The answer is of course he could not. Now, I do really respect that this guy gave three stars. It's very fair and even-handed. It's not one star, not five stars. It is three stars. Good experience. Unfortunately, there is anti-Chinese slander. So that is

you're going to lose two stars there. Now, we've been doing a podcast on this website for around three years. I think I would give it around three stars yeah sure because i there are highs and lows and i was gonna say we've been doing a podcast for around three years i think if you give me less than five stars on uh itunes that does ruin my day right even a four right well i'm not saying of our podcast no i know i'm just saying a three star i'm like oh it's a very fair reasonable middle of the road review but if you gave me a three stars i would um be very upset it's more hurtful than one star to get

anyone given you two stars we've gotten everyone we've got every one of the stars we've received Every one of them in the night sky. Why do you ask that, Adam? Are you enjoying it right now? Don't do it. It will upset me. You're going to trigger Jeremy, who is my jester. Look, I'm saying this with peace and love in my heart.

Adam Clayton. What does that mean? Adam Clayton, the fourth member of U2. Oh, okay, okay. I had to look up U2 because I remember Larry Mullen Jr. and the Edge and Bono. Somebody was probably waiting for you to say Adam Clayton, and so it's only fair that you finish the fight.

Yeah, I was like, I think a man of the people. Old writer for Cracked had that name. That was all I could think of. You think it was the same guy? Yeah. The bassist for you, too? On the side, like on the tour bus? Yeah, he's doing factoids.

Hey, the bagel was invented in Venice, or whatever. Oh, it's a big yawn. My cat's walking around. Please stop talking about the cat. There's a space in my apartment that is like the radiator, and it's about one foot from the hot pipe that heats the apartment. So my cat mostly just sits there

And becomes disgustingly hot And soaks up all of our warmth It's the cat toaster It's crazy He has one lung, he's pretty much a cold-blooded animal He needs to stand by the toaster He's got one lung, he's got a bad eye, no death perception He's got one lung?

He's got asthma now He's kind of like if Aqualung was a cat You have to give him an inhaler What happened to the other lung? We lost it Crime is out of control Now, he has a collapsed lung from before we got him from a hoarding situation. And every time we go to the vet, they're like, I'd love to just do, like, a $500 test and see what's going on in there.

And we're like, not again. And you know what? Because of that, I give this two stars. Thank you. Thank you. It's de Blasio. One lung, two stars. Two stars for Milo.

Milo's reviews are low. Let's read another review here. Please open on the right screen. This is a five-star one. This is somebody who loves Quora. All right, read it. And this is going to be a real issue we're going to run into with these. I'm interested to see how many we can read in a row,

because it does get a bit crazy as you go on. I'm excited to read every one of them. This is from Foxy2009. Five stars. Second Amendment. It's great what I have read so far. I love this Quora website. Citizens can talk freely,

and it's very well explained why the need of weapons possession. Hold on. great job done by you there quora we need to protect ourselves our families and our properties our properties everybody on quora who isn't chinese is italian we need to protect our properties lots of betrayal there god allowed us to back to the review thou shalt not kill not everybody especially courts read the whole commandment uh-huh at the end it says but if you kill another being while protecting your life your loved ones and your property god won't punish or find you guilty of any sin god doesn't mind i love the commandment with the

disclaimer this now shall not kill unless you have to while protecting your life your loved ones and your property now other than the beekeeper starring jason statham shall not kill honestly no one would blame you in a highly kinetic scenario you must protect your family You're the guy from Taken. Let's say a bad hombre is touching your daughter. What are you going to do, big man? That's the word of God. That's a bush saying.

I'd hit his ass with a flood, but you, dog? To finish the review. I'd never let someone touch my girl like that. That's my honeypot. Okay, I'm finishing the review. That was God speaking. Because this is good. at the bar, and this guy touches

your GF's butt. What you doing? What you doing? This CD is God's word. CD being, I think, short for commandment? I couldn't tell you. What the fuck is that? CD. This CD is God's word. Let's not forget that.

This CD is God's word. What are they talking about? How to dismantle an atomic bomb? Woo! I don't know that reference. It's another U2 album. I don't know about U2. I think that's the one that was on the iTunes. It wasn't the one that was forced on.

That was the one after. It's the one that has the Uno, Dos, Tres, Catorce. Jeremy, you're so young. You don't know about that. Anyway, it says, let's not forget that. Great job there. Congratulations.

And then it's everyone from the cast of Dion Genesis Evangelion clapping. And me and Jeremy are shaking hands. Congratulations. Congratulations. I find this to be the most accurate review of the website so far. I think it's great. Citizens can talk freely there.

And it's very well explained why the need of weapons possession. It's great what I have read so far. I like the disclaimer, too, of like, I might not read something good in the future. Just want to be clear. Yeah, there might be like a Chinese propaganda or something. But other than that, it's great. We've lost Dono because my cat's trying to get into a Trader Joe's bag. He's ripped a hole out of it.

He's going in. Again, not on the camera. but there is a cat in the room. God said you can shoot that cat because that's your property, right? He's only a one-long. You see a hottie like this, how you approaching her?

What opinion of yours has everyone like this? That fucking sword guy or whatever that was. That'd be so funny if that's what Moses brought down on the tablets. That picture. Here's two strong guys shaking hands. it's from predator you'll get it in the future he gave up on the bag listen let's get another review up here let's get another review up here another cat up here right there's not a second cat here donald's not gonna happen shit uh what this review is five stars it's from one year ago

by ran moser 358 five stars the owner of his dog digs a hole on his owner's grave talking about I enjoyed the story of the dog who laid on his dead owner's grave. His son looked long and hard for the dog and couldn't find him. The manager of the cemetery called the son and told him the dog was at the dead father's grave, so the son went to get the dog,

but dog returned to the grave and wouldn't let anyone near the grave. Did we say, by the way, this was a five-star review? Yes, we did. Understandably, again, for the app of Quora. This is from Ruth Ann Moser who lives in Sharonville, Ohio. I don't know where that is.

The son brought food and water to the dog but the dog wouldn't eat. The son did this for two weeks bringing food and water but later the owner's dog eventually died of a broken heart. Great story. Never ever heard like this before.

Ruth F. Sharonville, Ohio. Well, two exclamation points on that last one. Great story, semicolon. Never ever heard like this story before. If anyone listening has ever had a small podcast you're ever uh wondering like how do i reach out to the median listener of something

and that media listener is ruth m from sharonville ohio you gotta have more dead dog on a grave you got any dog stories you got like maybe this could boost the podcast you have a dead dog story you got any dead dog my dog who is now dead used to eat cell phones and then have to poop them out and she ate like 10 cell phones he's like 2005 cell phones are you sure she wasn't like tricked by the Joker from the Dark Knight into eating all those cell phones? If she was tricked, she loved being tricked. She did it so many times. She ate whole remote

controls. Did you ever do a thing where you're my cat's taking a shit? His wife and his little foot. Have you ever done the thing where you're like, I can't find my phone, let me call it and you hear like, do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do. And it's like, it's in the dog.

It's in your dog. It's in the dog. Yeah, and you gotta punch it out of the dog. You gotta pick up the dog, answer the dog like a phone. That's visual comedy. Hello. And you're holding a dog.

That's a good reason to have a dog. Oh, wait, wait, wait. Pick it up. Woof, woof, woof. Oh, my mother-in-law is calling. Am I right? Oh, shit. Oh, shit.

Yes. Oh, bark, bark. Anyone who knows my mother-in-law knows that she has the looks of a dog. Can I just say about this review, by the way, I really like that the Quora user, you can take the Quora user off of Quora, but you can't remove the Quora out of the Quora user.

I agree. Because even on iTunes, she's like, I got to put where I live. My review with my location. I do need my home address on this. Do you want to know where I went to school? The iTunes reviewer, it's like a guest book at a bed and breakfast or something.

you should have to put what you know about at the end. It's a guest book or a phone call from grandma. Yeah. Where it's like, here's who died. I don't know how they died. Or did you hear about the dog who died? Did you hear the dog died?

This iTunes review has a perfect email, chain email from grandma feel to it. This is something I might receive in the mail. Dog died of a broken heart. New character, Rorschach grandma. How does that go, Alex? Dog goes, man goes to doctor, says I can't find dog. Apple pie on window today.

Baked it long time. Dog died in New York. One day a storm will come, wash away the dog. Everybody laughs. Good joke, ha ha. All right, let's move on to the next one here. I'm not stuck in here with you You're stuck in here with me

Grandma Rorschach And where are we stuck? In the old folks home You're stuck in the old folks home You're stuck in the dog's belly in your cell phone Pov Okay here's another one Dwayne Woodward

This is another five star Another banger Police officers now today I'm not giving the credit with credit is due They always help the elderly one day I did something, and a police officer just talked to me about doing what is pleasing to God and doing what is right. Sometimes things like that helps a child to make better decisions in life. I think that office today, for what he did when I got older, instead of doing to mischievous days,

I would help the elderly by going to the store, getting water for them, and putting out the trash, things like that. Make it different in life. Always encourage children instead of putting them down. Maybe you will make a difference in a young man's life. I have rarely read a review so indicative of the median poster on a website. The median poster is sundowning. We should mention the title of this review is, We Really Have Good Officers Out There.

Not one sentence is right. Not one. Just like talking to the guy at the time, been like, I'm going to leave you a good review at your precinct, and then just you go to the Quora iTunes. Also, usually when we read posts like this, we have to do the disclaimer of like, look, we're not making fun of this person because we understand that they are living in India and they speak other languages. And this is like their fifth language. So that's why it's broken.

This is a 75-year-old white man in the Midwest. This is Dwayne Woodard. This is our friend Dwayne. This is this man's only language. I assume the former drummer for you, too. Yeah, probably. Dwayne Woodard. It's Dwayne Woodard.

Anglo spotted. Oh, baby. You were so close, Dono. great beautiful i'm like a pad expert do these labels no clearly not they never will be pull up the next one um okay we don't we don't have anything else to say about the how the police officer have been really great lately oh i do think they've been great i wonder what prompted this yeah i don't know if you feel like he was just sort of looking out the window and thinking about police officer nowadays was there another review saying police

officers aren't as good do we think that um this is someone reading a quora like this is in response to a quora this is somebody who they think that the review section is the app yeah i was about to say sometimes you have too many tabs open and you can you know get in the wrong one you're like it's weird quora's having me do a star system but i like that i think that's good they're making some great changes to the Guara. All right, let me open up

another one of these. And then I'll find Claire again who has gone missing as we... Whatever. Claire does not want to be on this. Claire!

Lose my number. Claire! Lose my number. Someone has said that to my friend once and it was very funny. Like, very seriously. He said,

lose my fucking number. That's awesome. Can I read this one? I can read now. Yeah, yeah. If you're a subscriber, go to Patreon and subscribe. They're doing great stuff

behind that paywall. If you want to hear Dono be too hungover Oh, yeah, Donald's on the bonus about halfway through. When I came in midway, before I got that body armor on me, I couldn't read. Now I can read. This is electrolytes.

Yep, okay. Yeah, I'm not actually wearing body armor. He's not wearing tactical body armor. Unless you're in the audio version, then I am wearing body armor. I'm kind of a tactical guy. This is five stars. Three stars. No, it's not three stars.

Five stars from Lori Sill. I'd like to put a pie on her, Windowsill reference. Whoa. ghost hunters i'm not a ghost hunter you can't say that's all no punctuation on that but i sure have encountered ghosts and it's no fun here in my own home i will even take a lie detector test if you don't believe me but yes ghosts do exist and i've had encounters with them not only me but my son also we got rid of them through prayer and supplication exorcism and much more smoke the mount white sage incense i used oils oh my god those people who don't believe in ghost we're

among ghosts end of sentence one six exclamation points sentence two sentence two begin they're in trouble we're at the end of time and the ghosts are out out of control the shooting in schools they're possessed the kids are possessed and they go into the games into the brain into their hearts they commit suicide they're attacking our children believe you me your ghost and they're everywhere and the proof is all around us. And if you want to close your eyes on it, it's your problem. But believe me,

the ghosts are here hunting our children. And the coincidence. My understanding is this is the plot of I Saw the TV Glow and the ghost is cisgenderism. Yeah, the ghost is cisgenderism there. Is that a word, cisgenderism? Do you throw an ism on that?

I kind of feel like the ghost in that movie was not coming out, but when you know that you see cisgenderism. But she's still sucking. She's still sucking. When you know you're trans, but she's still sucking. That's what you're trying to say. When she's sucking your gender.

But you already like, oh, whoa. What gender got you like this? And it's the swords. The knives. But really, they're sucking you. It's Leonardo DiCaprio pointing at the screen, and the screen is your gender. Yes.

It's the TV. And it glow. And it glow. This, another very accurate review of Quora. And now Claire is dressed like Leo from One Battle After Another. She's got the hood up. Claire is Cornholio mode again. I've gotten Cornholio mode.

TP for your bunghole. TP for your bunghole. Damn, I wish I had my fucking hoodie. It always looks fun. To have a hoodie? Yeah, to cinch the hood up, go Cornholio mode. It feels really safe. I think that's why it's creating some sort of womb-like environment.

Yeah. Are you scared of the ghosts, Claire? I'm scared of the ghosts that are getting into my games. and making me want to commit sluerside. What if we can say this is? Suerside. Suerside. May I suggest smoking them out, white sage incense?

Yeah, check out incense. Check out smoking them out. And please do not commit suerside. Yeah, don't do that. Do not ride it. Please. Don't do that. There is hope, and it's in white sage incense.

Go into the games, into the brain, into their hearts. That kind of goes hard. It's kind of like a rap. It's really hard. They go into the games and to the brain and to their hearts. I ate a big burger with onions, and when I go to my buddies after this, I'm going to let out lots of farts. Oh, that's good.

Wait, do you want to just, like, freestyle the rest of the evening? I didn't realize you had bars like that. I have my drum machine in my backpack. We could get a beat going. We are not getting that out. Let's get that out. Let's get the cat back in here. Let's play U2's latest album.

What else have I been annoying about? And I'm going to drink another body armor. Claire, do you want to read this one? Geico Caveman Show. Yes. Have you seen it? No. Four stars.

Watch Geico Caveman Show. No. This was titled Biblical. It's by 88 at greatness. Oh, no. What we are experiencing is biblical with President Trump. His whole cabinet is corrupt. They shall pay for their treachery.

they all look unsure of what they're doing vance is the beneficiary we will see as the whole weight coming toward him and his family they all have to eventually answer for standing behind and supporting the most hated administration in the last 50 years worldwide exclamation point period worldwide strengthened to the is short-lived cowards they all are bully ball is what trump plays. They are all on his team. I pray for their families. Wait, was this written by Yoda? This is Yoda's

review of the Quora app. What we are experiencing is biblical with Trump. Bullyball this is. I think people think Quora is America. Yeah. They're just confusing Quora for the country

of America. Okay, I understand where they're coming from there. Quora is sort of a beautiful melting pot of all types of people. It's all the kinds of ideas. This is all solidifying my theory that

these people think that the review section is the app. Yeah, they think they're doing this app. I just don't know how you would set how like you'd have

that issue. Can I ask a sort of vulnerable question? Yeah, what's up? What is Bullyball? I was wondering the same thing. Is it like,

is it Kill the Carrier? Is that Bullyball? I don't know. You want to play a little Bullyball? Yeah, look it up. I'm going to Google it. It's season six cyber coordinator.

Jamie, look it up. I think it's similar to smear the queer, which we don't say anymore. The progressive name is bully ball. Wait, there's a subreddit for it, and it's a dude with a ball, and it's got a snoo head. I think that's basketball. That's the NBA subreddit, unfortunately. Boo. Oh, wait.

On Reddit, it says, how do you define bully ball? When you hear the term bully ball, most of us imagine LeBron bulldozing his way to the basket. I fucking hate Reddit so much. This is how different it is. When you go to the Quora stuff, it's all people being like, I talked to God. He said guns are dope.

And then you go to Reddit and like, have you ever thought about what the meaning of words are? Webster's Dictionary defines bully ball as LeBron bulldozing. Shut up. Shaq dominating in the post. I guess it's just when you're rude with a ball is bully ball. Someone said, what is bully ball to you? And he says, when I think of bully ball,

I think of Zach Randolph posting up, throwing three hidden elbows into the defender's chest and whispering out how he's going to murder them on the street. What? What the fuck? So this is again. You can't do that. The issue we're having is that none of us watch any sports. Yeah, I don't know shit.

And they're saying normal things that we don't understand. Yeah, thanks for the gold, idiot. You're just making people up. LeBron? That's not a guy. I'm going to click this video. No, Jeremy, we can't just watch the NBA. I'm not going to do it.

We've had so many copyright issues the last two weeks. Dude, great news. The cat is back. The cat has returned. He's going to his toasty spot. He came back the very next day. I still don't know what bully ball is. It's when you're rude with a ball.

It's when you throw elbows and say you're going to kill them in the street. Got it. Bully ball. Bully ball. It's also what Donald Trump is doing every day. He's playing it. 2X hit an elbow, 3X basketball. I like how easy this app is to use with one hand.

We're playing Bully Ball. That's it. I want the cats on the radiator this time. This is impressive. I like that you're doing it like it's a play-by-play. Claire, I wish you could see. This is Bully Ball. He's playing Bully Ball with the radiator.

That's what I was going to say. The cat is on it. I've seen it. I love it. He's tapping some shit. I love hearing about it. No, wait. He's licking his armpit.

I want to read this one. Please. This is five stars by Paoli Swiss Rebel. Paoli. Addictions hyphen love addiction was my Achilles heel. Of all addictions, I chose love addiction at a very advanced age when I should have already been dead. You can choose addictions. That's awesome.

It was between this and heroin that I chose love. But I chose not just anyone, but a very charismatic and highly talented musical artist who had demonic powers over me. He couldn't seduce me physically, but visited me regularly in incubus form for 10 years or more. On the 11th year, my higher self threw me in bed every time. Have he performed in my town? and on the 12th year I finally walked out of his life

and went no contact you gotta go no contact a profound karmic lesson at last I'm free get five stars you gotta go no contact with your demon lover

who loves you even though you should be dead what were you saying Claire? I was just gonna say that the guy from the band Incubus

is visiting this woman and that's pretty crazy we haven't we haven't heard about him in a while he's a sexy guy it's been all you too take the wheel

and drive ladies if he's visiting you in Incubus form he's not your man yes sorry clap emoji clap emoji he's reinventing metal using turntable slides he couldn't seduce me physically but visited me regularly in incubus form well it's because he's trying to get her like that he's trying to show her his like v spot you know what i'm saying he's but you know the the sexy like v muscle in your groin that ladies love

gutters i just wish there was a better word for it than that because like i feel like if you're like if you're in a polite situation you're trying to discuss things like a doctor you'd be like you know the abs or the gutters of cum that rub down your stomach it's like oh fuck it they keep pulling on the headphone cable uh there's a word for that and i can't think of what it is it's a triangular dick muscle i've heard it called as well so do we think that this person had sex with the demon guy Because they say he couldn't seduce me physically. But on the 11th year, my higher self threw me in bed every time. Have he performed?

Yeah, I think eventually that he got there. On the 11th year of love addiction, my higher self threw me in bed. Every time, have he performed in my hometown? Also, how old are you that you should have been dead at an advanced age, but you've got 12 more years at least? and you went out fucking a profound karmic lesson this is this person is 112 years old this is often the arc people take is they're into sex when they're you know teens and then they grow out of it or they have kids or they're too busy or whatever they kind of

have less sex then you become senior citizen uh-oh a demon is trying to seduce me every day this shows up this was written by joe biden about barack obama His Achilles heel I'll just say This app sounds really good I agree It's crazy that in old folks homes The rates of incubus appearances

Are actually very high They're way higher than most homes Cat's back in the corner Great he's back Setting down his butt Corner cat Sniffing Let's get another review up here

We got two more Let's get another cat up here Can I read this one? I really like reading these unhinged things Reading can be empowering It's another sad dog

Dog left alone for six days, five stars This is from like three weeks ago This is recent I enjoyed reading this little story this little this little tale about a fucking dog that got left alone because sometimes we forget the importance of our care to these four-legged animals question mark we demand their obedience and loyalty giving no thought to the consequences of our neglect to them this family should be very

thankful that god chose to help this animal survive and get off their lazy quote asses to do something anything to make up for their lack of responsibility question mark exclamation point you know what the entero bang entero bang that's right entero bang cat stretching out over there next time this dog gets to go on vacation parentheses doggy day camp or something and leave the double parentheses humans they're half jewish there's only one but we're all humans are we not that's next time this dog gets to go on doggy on vacation doggy day camp or something and leave the humans a home alone to watch home alone for the holidays what do you think

it's like a game show at the end what do you think welcome back to what do you think We've got a dog left alone. What do you think? I wouldn't give it five stars. That's my father from Brooklyn. Dog left alone for six days? Three stars, Dono. Three stars.

Can you stop kissing me? This family should be very thankful that God chose to help this animal survive. A lot of God stuff in these reviews. Yeah, I'm not trying to get political in the iTunes review. A lot of God stuff. A lot of demons. A lot of all cats. A lot of bizarre punctuation.

I don't understand this one as much as the last dog one. The last dog one I got, they were just like, this is a great place to drop a parable. But this one is confusing to me. Well, this is kind of a parable. We demand obedience and loyalty for our dogs without thinking of the consequences of our neglect to them. And that makes you think.

It does make you think, but a parable would be like, a dog walked into a store one day. It met the store clerk who was a pig. a dog a priest and a chinese guy walking to a pig's house everyone remembers plato's chinese guy tales i'm gonna be honest this is making me think okay that we need that's what it's supposed to do the way that we need to protect our four-legged uh babies or whatever i think we should take action we should talk about the cat i think we're neglecting him by stopping me from bringing up the cat's not doing anything he's just kind of chilling he doesn't ever do anything

alex he just put his head down on his leg and it wasn't down before and now he's twitching a little bit he's just getting his little butt closer to the we can't don't fall for this i i'm you know i got sucked into it okay i guess we're neglecting your cat for six days i mean i'm gonna leave you home alone to watch home alone for the holidays that sounds fine with me i end up freezing all I don't have stairs, so I can't do a lot of the cool pranks he does. I have a one-bedroom apartment. Yeah, the pranks you can do in an apartment are greatly limited. Yeah.

That's something people aren't brave enough to talk about. I like when people are bad at writing, and they're like, I know I shouldn't say dog this much. What's a good synonym for dog? Four-legged animal? Yeah. It's kind of the same thing? Well, it's an umbrella term.

I guess it's better than, like, floofer. The point is they recommend the app. Heckin' four-legged animal. You should check out Quora if you enjoyed this. There's one more. We have one more. We got one more on there, and then we're going to do some love questions here.

Oh. Now, your podcast is mostly about relationships and love, Dono. Is your stream still love-themed as well? No, the stream is mostly hate-themed. Oh, okay. The other side of the coin. The other fist. Initially, it was Dono Hell,

because I was trying to change my Twitch name, and I didn't realize when you change it, you can't change it for six months. Oh, yeah, I've run into that. But then I started watching Garbage on there, and now it is down to hell because we watch stuff. Perfect. It's like being in hell.

What garbage? I've only seen Caveman with you, so I haven't seen any of the garbage ones. Caveman, your recommendation secret girlfriend that everybody's mad at you about. Pav, you have a girlfriend. Let's see. Gold Rush Alaska, Dilbert Show.

I try to watch some Huell Hauser. I like Huell Hauser. Who's Huell Hauser? He did California's Gold. I thought he was a comedy bang-bang original character. He's a real guy. He's a real guy. Oh, that's interesting.

He's just a big boy from outside of Nashville somewhere, and he goes around in California, and he goes, the one I watched, he goes to the first Del Taco, which turns out not to be the first Del Taco. Oh, no. He does a lot of like, so this is a Del Taco. Yeah. It's like a fast food restaurant.

he's often going to like fair county fairs and being like now this prize sheep's name is willie how'd you come up with that it's really great it's good but it turns out if you watch it on stream they're like an hour long and truly nothing the highlights are great the show itself is it's truly just him grabbing random people so you work at the del taco it's not to be streamed I thought there was going to be more fodder. It's not to be lampooned. Yeah, it's for the historian. It speaks for itself.

Okay, this is our last review. I would like to read this one. I haven't read one. T53N says, five stars, truth was in the bull's eye. Believe that. Believe that. The man changed his ways

after finding peace in the bull's eyes. The man looking into the bull's eyes knew he couldn't kill any more bulls. and he stopped right then and there. That's a beautiful moment that he shared with the bull, and he went on to become a vegetarian, and he stopped killing bulls. He stopped killing all animals, all because he saw peace in the eyes of the bull, and he felt the bull asking the man not kill him.

That moment not only changes the man's life, but it also changed the bull's life and changed many of the people who heard the story of why the man couldn't kill the bull that day. God used it for the good of his people, and it ended up saving lots and lots of God's people. maybe you're one of God's people it has helped out again this is a review of the Quora app

we just have to keep saying it because none of them have been a review of an app of any kind it's important to remind you this is about the app for the website Quora which is like Facebook but it's Reddit I do keep forgetting midway through that

this is what this is I thought we were just reading parables from iTunes. At a certain point, it feels like you've developed a fever. That's what it's like using the website. You found peace in the bull's eyes. I agree with that. Well, they're herbivores. This is a guy who killed

lots of bulls. The vengeful cock. Yeah. The vengeful cock kills a lot of bulls. Oh, yes, yes, yes. That's right. It also changed the bull's life. Finally getting out of his chair. This and fucking my wife changed the bull's life. It's kind of the

alternate title for Othello, The Vengeful Cuck. I wish I knew anything about Othello besides the name. He's one of the members of U2. That was a great Shakespeare reference that just died on the table. It died here in front

of all of us. Hamonet. Henry the... I feel like a podcast with a bunch of bulls. There's like Henry the Sixth and Seventh and stuff too. I don't know, man.

There's a lot of Henrys over there. They're going nuts. They got all kinds of Henrys. They come out of a bog. They're obsessed with Henrys. They got so many Henrys. All the men in England come out of a bog like orcs in Lord of the Rings. Yeah, and they put the big white hand on them.

Yeah. You are Saruman's Henry. Oh, boy. I'm coming out of my Henry sack. All right. At this juncture, I think we should read some quarrels. Can I say real quick, people send us more of these. These are great.

I love these. Did you send this in with some listener? Yes, I shouted them out before their name is... It doesn't matter. Cushel Valley. I don't even remember his name. They know who they are. Oh, Cushel Valley.

It says it in the thing. Cushel. Cushel, you're the curator of the week. Thank you. You're the curator of the week. Why don't we do that? Yeah, you should do that. Who's the curator of the week, Cushel?

It's Cushel. We're not going to do another week of this. We're going to fuck it up really bad. Next week, it's Dono. We could just say that right now. It's going to be Dono again. I could be the curator every week. Yeah, as a backup.

when it seems like we're not doing it right. Dono's the quarator of the week. If we don't say there's a quarator of the week that week, just assume it's Dono. Assume it's me.

For now, it's fine. All right, well, let's do some Is That Okays. We've got a bunch of them. Oh, okay. Let's pull those up. We do have a lot of them. Should we just go

through a bunch of them and not do any chorus? And this will be the episode? Is that crazy? I kind of like that. Yeah, yeah, let's do that. It's crazy, but it just might work.

What's that? I kind of like that. Is that okay? This isn't the best idea ever had is that okay is our weekly call-in segment please call in with your questions by leaving us a voicemail at quarators at gmail.com we're answering questions in the style of quora try to keep your answer i'm sorry try to keep your questions under 30 seconds and don't do anything so crazy it's i don't like it when it's too crazy all right let's do a bunch of these

first one big ass i am really jealous of the online communities that fetish fetishists have um but my only fetish is busty women and that one is too general um i want a niche community what is the best fetish community for me to get into um it's pretend to be into just for the community aspect of it thanks which fetish has the best community community okay okay how first of all i think busty women is probably fine i don't see why that's a bad one isn't no they have w a thing they have no community well take it take it to the there's the one where it is like terrifyingly busty women right oh yeah the cock destroyers sure you know about them i don't know if i do well they have like implants and their boobs are like the the size of their head and

They're the cock destroyers. Are they cock destroyers because they hit you with the boobs? They smash you? They destroy them. They could flatten your cock with their boobs. It is kind of that. Well, why would they? I know everything about them because of fucking Blocked Party podcast.

Great, great show. Okay. So they did cameos. Don't shout out another show. How dare you? You should listen to old episodes of WTF with Marc Maron. Do not do that. Only listen to the one Claire was on.

You're plugging Mark Maron? Claire, you were on Mark Maron? Yes. Claire pretty much is Mark Maron. You weren't in the garage, though, Claire, were you? I feel like you guys were in a car. We were in a car. Claire's in cars getting coffee with Mark Maron.

Claire's eating some sort of... The cat just tucked his paws in. I think you should get into a fetish where you're a mouse and you're getting stepped on. I think those people are scared. and scared people stick together. That's true. Also, the guys who like the wet pants crowd,

it seems really supportive of each other. That does seem easy. The wet clothes community on Quora are all very supportive. WCC. It seems very male-centric, though. It does. So if you're into big, busty women, you're probably not finding them in the wet clothes community.

Right. I was going to say furries, but furries seems expensive. If you're a woman who's in the wet pants community, you are probably the star of the community. everyone's probably so excited to talk to you to jump in the pool yeah we somebody sent a subreddit into us for a bonus episode of people with a birkenstock fetish and a bunch of pictures of guys with their like cock in a birkenstock no cock in a birkenstock i was gonna say it's a foot fetish but it sounds like it's not quite at all they're talking about like uh they like the really

nasty worn ones that have like the sweat print they're like oh yeah like fucking the shoes i I don't want to lick that shoe. It's got the indent. Whoa. It's really gross. That's so weird. It's kind of a fetish for fine design, isn't it? That's right.

Yeah, they appreciate good footwear. Sensible. Something Christ would wear. I don't think I'd go that far. Maybe you could get into feet. I feel like, because they have a whole wiki, so that's like a growing community that isn't that hard to fake, right? Because feet are kind of nasty, but they're not as nasty as Birkenstock.

Stinky Birkenstock. It's really gross. Feed people seem mean to me. Do they? Feed people are actually a little mean. They want to be stepped on. First of all, they're stealing looks at feed all the time, which feels predatory.

And then when they're compiling on their site, I feel like they're leaving a lot of negative reviews for feed. All right, just be vanilla. Yeah, why don't you just do missionary sex to your large titty wife? I think you need to figure out what kind of nipples you like so you can sort of pare down the community because you're saying big honkers is too general of a community.

Pick what kind of honkers you're looking for and put that in the search. Is there a community where the honkers have eyebrows drawn on so they look like angry eyes? That's pretty fun. That could be a family to call home. We have more as that.

Let's do this one. My boyfriend really likes Demon Slayer, the anime. He really wants me to like it too, but I don't. and I kind of think anime is like for perverts is that

okay first of all perfect is that okay that's exactly how they are on the website with a burp added in which is how we do the podcast did you say anime is for perverts

yeah they did say anime is for perverts which is their right do you think that Do I think anime is for perverts? I don't think anime is for perverts, although I think frequently perverts do like anime. Often it is for perverts. Because the beautiful animation is for everybody

and perverts have discerning eyes. You're allowed to not like things that your boyfriend likes. That's very common. It's okay. And it's totally okay. Having read all of Demon Slayer, rather uh it is kind of a baby mode style anime um it's fun to watch there's lots of sword fighting and it's cool but it is like there's like even less of a story than most of the other ones

so i think you could maybe use that against it maybe you'd like a more adult oriented uh one to start with and then you could maybe work towards more of the slop brain stuff later if you want to try to make this hobby work but it's okay to not like it too i think it is for perverts and i think you're right to say that yeah i think so too i also say a lot of anime characters are perverts themselves that's true or a pervert's delight and i like anime oh some of it but like even the ones i like it's like you kind of have to like look the other way like you watch like i love evangelion and it's all about like these young sexy children and then they're like well in the movie we made a rule that she has she looks like a child but she's actually 25 and it's like

That's worse. I kind of get what they were going for there, where the whole thing is like, POV, you are a 14-year-old boy. That's the only way you're allowed to defend it. It's like, well, it's about puberty. Because that's what it's like when you are a 14-year-old boy. Yes, and that's one of the good ones.

I just watched that for the first time, and it was very good, but it's wild to alternate between pretty moving scenes and then, like, okay, all of the three children pilots, you don't have to get naked. You got to get in the goo. And there's a funny penguin. I love the penguin

I'll say this conversation sounds like an iTunes review of Quora Just sort of saying why anime is good We have really interesting opinions here Thanks for your question, you're the Quarrior of the Week We already gave that out You don't have that authority

A rare double Quarrior of the Week You keep this up, you're not going to be Quarrior of the Week Is that okay? Hi Quarriors, if you're out of Hot Springs and a guy and his son comes up with a tuning fork and asks if you want your heart chakra opened. Is the best situation to do that in a hot springs

with your wife's gay best friend surrounded by naked men? Thanks. If you're in a hot spring. This is basically a plot of a perverted anime. And a man with a tuning fork comes out and asks if he can open your heart chakra. Okay. Is it the best place to do it if it's your wife and her gay friends?

You didn't say okay, so you're the antique warrior. Oh, no. Get in the hole. I think the spirit of the question was, is that okay? Is that okay? Yeah, that's cool. I'm not sure it is okay because your heart chakra is your own business. This sounds like this may be a Kingdom Hearts-style scenario

where they're trying to close your heart. Real quick, new segment idea. donald puts on chapstick oh that's good donald you think you're so powerful to be coming on our show you're naming coordinators of the week you're doing new segments you don't have any of the sounds this is my show now i take back what i said about you being default coordinator of the week you gotta take it away you can't that contract was signed but you thought it was so important to have these kissable lips that you just made a segment about it and i'm in the middle of a kingdom hearts discovery of a uh question segment here which is is this man gonna close your heart

or open it up with a tuning fork i don't know what the tuning fork is that the one that's like it's like metal and then it's like two it's like a trident but it's two and you go and then yeah that's right i don't think it's okay i think i don't think that's what the question was you got it right back is that a trope or something is it like a chakra thing the fucking tuning fork i've never heard of this this is appropriately i just i don't like to keep your fork away from me yeah don't bring any tools keep your fork away yeah this is appropriately you guys have all done a great job of sending us quora style questions because i do feel like i've had a concussion yes listening to three of

these in a row i feel fucking crazy right and that's i feel worse than i did when we read all of the iTunes reviews, which were genuinely insane. You're making Jeremy feel bad. I feel sick. And it has nothing to do with the fact that Alex had neurovirus very recently. And we've been kissing all week. If you were going to get it, you would have already got it

because I gave it to one of my clients instantly and he got it like the same day. You kissed one of your clients? Yeah, we were kissing to warm up. We've been using tongues. I'm also a personal trainer. It wasn't a personal training client. It was a call boy. We warm up our mouths and then we warm up

our minds that's beautiful man thank you cat's got his head resting let's do another one okay somebody called you the q crew that's great yeah thank you for doing that hey core raiders i was wondering if it's possible um to know how to handle the fact that charles buchowski the famous writer might be inhabiting and possessing our cat that we have this is the same cat who i was asking if they would recognize their balls if we cut them off so i think just keep that in mind while answering the question of if what to do if Charles Bukowski is possessing my cat.

Is the What to do if Charles Bukowski. Is the question what to do or like how do you know? I don't know. Or is that okay? I think it's what to do or is that okay if Charles Bukowski is in my cat. And that's

not okay because your cat's going to be drinking whiskey. Yeah, he's going to be living a little bit of whiskey. He's going to be living that rude life. He's going to be having weird sex and writing stuff about it. Yeah, and also in retrospect, kind of doing some stuff that is not okay. Thank you for saying that, by the way. Thank you for calling that cat in.

I'm calling you in. Examine your behavior. Don't act like it's 1905 or whenever it is when you're doing that stuff. Because you're a cat now. You've got to act like you are a 2025 cat. Boom. Boom. Boom.

Welcome to 2025 and you're a cat, by the way. Wait, it's 2026, right? Oh, fuck. Whatever. Same thing. Shit. Boom Meow-ski. Boom Meow-ski.

Woke is back. It's 2026. Dono is right. Boom Meow-ski. Boom Meow-ski. I hope that answered your question. I think that was great. Don't let your cat drink any alcohol.

That's probably bad. It is bad. They can't digest it. If my cat was possessed by a person, that guy is dumb as rocks. Hello. My cat is not a smart writer. No. That cat is so stupid, man.

okay i thought nicotine like instant killed dogs or cats if they ate it but i was dog sitting my parents kind of new dog it was like great size she's enormous well she ate an entire can of zen including and i had to go to the emergency vet and the vet was like i told her how much this is a cool dog she was like oh she could have eaten like two cans of this and been fine because she's so big and I'm like if I ate a can of Zin I would die

and I weigh twice as much as this dog there's no fucking way wow you're kind of a pussy huh according to this vet yeah your dog's so cool

does he have a twitch stream I can follow yeah this dog is really reading news on reddit and telling me some basic stuff oh is that your impression

of what a twitch streamer does yeah I kind of think that's what they do I think I think just generally the media is just like oh look at that thing that's bad or good

Well, some Twitch streamers watch Caveman, the Geico Caveman show. Alex, have you seen that one? I have not, and I'm thrilled to check it out. I can't wait to see it. Next episode, we're doing all Caveman chorus. All Caveman. The thing that you have to understand about the Caveman show is that it's so important to buy Geico car insurance, which is what that is an advertisement for.

It'll make your car protected. And also, don't be a shaver. Yeah, that's what they call people who shave their caveman features. Oh, yeah. To hide their identity as cavemen. My friend Nick Kroll says this show's actually good. Can you send him a text? Call him up, Claire.

Send him the Zoom link. Nick Kroll, come on the Dono Hell stream. Nick, they're talking shit about you again. They're mocking your great show. I didn't know the mouth thing was like a thing, and that's why the show was called that. I didn't really notice that. That he has a big mouth?

Yeah, I didn't put it together. You look at photos of him as a child, and he looks so much like the cartoon It's Scary. That's crazy. as the little guy with the big head. Pull up child Nick Kroll. My emotional investment

in this is so reduced. We're desperately trying to end the podcast but I will show you a picture of Nick Kroll as a child. I'll allow it and then we'll end.

Yeah, he looks exactly like that. Is that real? Yeah, that's him, dude. He's wearing a little suit and his eyes are a little too far apart and really big

and he's got a ginormous mouth. He's got anime eyes. I do wonder if maybe he was just a victim of like fashion decisions his mother was making or something. Dude, his mouth is big.

I know, but the hair choice is brutal. You're choosing the size of your daughter's mouth? Yeah, I picked normal. I thought that was the ideal mouth. He looks less like a cartoon in the cartoon. Yeah, they made him look better. He looks more like a cartoon character as a young child. Never has a man needed a beard more as a child.

He looks good now. I'm not shitting on Nick Kroll. He looks normal. No, he's a hot guy now. He's so hot. You should see him on the soccer pitch. He's really good at soccer. Nick Kroll, you're a sexual dynamo.

Come on, The Quarrior's podcast. Nick, we'd love to have you. You think he's listening? He listens to the podcast of all his soccer teammates. Was he good at soccer, Claire? You know, again, I had to sign an NDA, so I couldn't say. That's it for the show, everybody.

That's it for the show. No, no, no. No, no, no, no. Wait, that's a moon drop, right? Dono, it was great having you, and I remember when you were the real-ass Quarrior of the Week. Thank you.

Although that has been discontinued, tragically, since. Where can our listeners find you at home and abroad? Oh, sorry, I just got a news alert. It looks like they've reinstated Dono as Quarrior of the Week segment going forward. That's awesome. No, they didn't, and this exact power trip is how you lost the feature to begin with, Dono. And I didn't like when the guy said, the person who emailed us said, hey, Quarriors, and you said, hey. And I was like, you can't say that.

You can't say that. I'm of the people. That's us. You can't speak for us. You, listener, and I'm pointing at the camera again. It's out of control. Thank you for having me on. I'd just like to plug that the cat is sleeping next to the radiator still.

You can find me at twitch.tv slash donohell or the Radio Free Tote Bag podcast. I don't have any shows or anything coming up. That's pretty much it. Okay, well, those are two ways. That's the best way to find anybody is through their online stuff. Thank you so much for listening to our show. There's a second episode you can get every week, and if you want to hear the most unhinged shit you've ever heard in your life,

You've got to subscribe this week. And that is at patreon.com slash Quarriors. For just $5 a month, you get four more episodes a month, which is kind of crazy. Sometimes five episodes a month. I got to, like, renegotiate my wages. That rounds down to zero in my mind. That's so crazy, yeah.

Basically, $5 is $0. It's pretty much $0, so check that out. $6 is also $5. Do the math. that's what the guy who made peak said yeah famously in an interview last week that's what that was i don't know why i was like that's from something i can't remember next week last week next week we will go back to reading the chorus my fingers on the pulse of the news and that's why i'm the core reader of the week i guess we gotta end this podcast he's bye bye bye ciao