Quorators - Strategic Sorcery

Episode Date: October 26, 2026

Comedians Clare O'Kane, Alex Ptak, and Jeremy Kaplowitz explore the mysterious land of Quora.com to answer life's questions. This week's questions include: ....well actually this week we kind of just dick around on a website for how to use black magic(k) spells to make you better at your job --- Watch the show @ youtube.com/@quorators Get even more Quorators @ patreon.com/quorators Send quoras and qommunicate on our discord discord.gg/7pPYuKuYCr

Wait. Now we're recording. Claire has yet to grow heavy with child. Shut up. I'm still light with empty womb. I'm still light with these eggs. I'm all loaded up on eggs. All women are pretty much walking around like they're right in the dairy aisle at the grocery store.

Come on. Pretty much bursting with eggs. That's what it's like. Right. Are we recording this? We are. Have you seen the prices these days? I know.

Here's the thing about eggs. This is well-trod territory, but there will be like a $9 carton of eggs and a $3 carton of eggs, and they'll all be like humane. And it's like, what is the difference between these two things? How much are you torturing the chickens with the $3? Right. You're just like punching them in the face every time they lay one? How much cheaper is it for you to punch them?

Why does it make it less money? Is the chicken sexually into the punch? You're saying the tortured ones are more expensive. The tortured ones are, no. Because they're sexually into it. Oh, well, I don't think. So for the $3 ones, they don't like it. But then for the chickens that like being punched in the face, it's going to cost you.

Well, they have better eggs. Right. We have to pay for the guys who punch. Of course. You pay for the puncher. And that's where that expression comes from, you pay for the puncher. You pay for the puncher. I've been saying.

I have the piper. On this podcast, I was saying all hat and no saddle, like over and over again. You were. Somebody corrected me. Apparently, it's all hat and no cattle. Huh. Oh, that makes sense. That makes more sense.

It makes an equal amount of sense to me. You're kind of like a rough and tumble, Texan guy. I'm sort of a cowboy. I just by Long Island acting, being like, you're all hat and no cattle. Well, look who's rustling up some trouble. There's a snake in my boot. I must have Woody. Oh, no, a snake.

Oh, brother. The first time I heard a Long Island accent was in college, and I could not believe it. Like, I thought he was pranking me the entire time. It's cartoon. Why is that? Oh, no, I forgot something at work. Like, the way they hit G's is the crazy part of it,

or everything is because like, mm, God. I will jokingly, I don't even know if this is Long Island or not, but whenever I want water, I say, can I have some warder, please? That's silly. It's necessary. There are ours added to certain things. See, in Boston, we do the other way.

Order. Ours are not allowed. Water. We leave the R's out of it. Give me some water. You leave those R's out of it. I'm going to drown you in this water. I come from a racially segregated town, and we took the ours out a long time ago.

That was the first thing we did. When people were like, you got to. of saying the R word. You're like, I haven't been saying R words my whole life. I've never said an R word. You can't physically can't. It's never happened before and it's not happening today. Anyway, it's the Halloween episode.

Okay. Let's go. It's another day in hell here at the Quarators podcast. Oh, ha, ha, ha, ha. All your hosts are here. My skin. It's Jeremy, Alex, Claire, and that's, It's fire everywhere.

Fire! If you're not watching YouTube, there is fire everywhere. Yeah, on account of all the sins you've all done. Right. Fornication. You've been sinning. Lying. Lying is a big one.

Mostly lying. Yeah. Lying is the cornerstone of podcast. I've been lying so much on the internet. People are always mad at me about. I'm going to go to hell for that for sure. Oh, you recently did a tweet saying your wife has not condemned the Muslim Brotherhood. That was true.

That wasn't a lie. She's never done that. That's the one time you weren't like. Yeah. And then she posted on Instagram, she said, and I never will. And then I was like, do you know what the Muslim Brotherhood is? She was like, not really. And then she was like, I'm going to delete that.

I don't really know what I'm talking about. See, there's your first mistake. She has a job. Yeah, exactly. She really should not be doing things like that. That's a real job. I feel like the pendulum swing on like punishment versus reward for having a social media account has swung so heavy into just punishment that you got to really,

you got to be like, I'm never going to work for a position that I can be fired from. Yeah, I mean, I remember when I worked at hard drive a lot, people would, whenever I would make like offensive tweets, people would try to tag hard drive to fire me. And I'd be like, bitch, that's also me. That's my girl. I don't have a real job.

Who do you think invented Mario Monday? That's right. It's Jeremy. What's a stop? Oh, we're here in hell, folks. Year four of the Quarators podcast, Halloween episode. I don't think we did one the first year. I don't remember.

Because we had kind of just started. Yeah. And I was pretty into just going on Quora back then. Those were the days. Not anymore. Now I'm dead inside. And I'm piloted by a ghost. Welcome to the show.

It was my birthday. Also, Halloween is a day. Oh, yeah. Happy hello birthday. I mean, it'll be, it's in a week or two from now, but it'll be a few days from this episode. I hope you get your hat and saddle. Yeah, thank you.

And cattle on top of it. And cattle. That's what I'm getting for my birthday. You needed to go with the saddle. I'm getting several cows. Yeah, because you've got to put it on the same thing. It's my Jesus year. I'll be 33.

Oh, wow. Maybe I'll be crucified. That's a good year. I think Jesus was having a good one until that last part. Yeah, he did get killed, but he had a lot of suppers. Yeah, dude. Oh, bro, as you get all. You get in.

Oh, I wanted to say, 30s are about suppers. Unrelated to this. One of you will betray me. It's me. I can't keep a secret for very long. I'm going to betray you. And I'm going to kiss you.

At a burrito place in Brooklyn. One of you will betray me. I fucking know you. Don't expect me to wash your feet, Jeremy. Claire currently does not have much hair to wash feet with the way women used to in the Bible. Ew, they washed it with their hair. washed it with their hair. That's as I recall what happens.

Take their hair and they want. It's the past. It's far in the past. Right. Well, it's Halloween. What's the name? Do we have a name of this episode or even know? Halloween 4.

With Clero Kane. You just keep putting with Clayton. I'm the guest. Well, we haven't done a site of the week in a long time. So let's hit the button for that, bad boy. That's not it, isn't it? Site. Saved by the Jeremy.

Somebody tweeted this at me. Jason Miller's strategic sorcery. There he is. I don't really know anything about it. I didn't even really click around, but I went to his about and I thought it looked slightly funny, and I said, let's read this on a podcast. All right, so this looks like a Microsoft Word document

with a big square picture of Jason Miller, I'm assuming, in it. He kind of looks like Logan Roy, but younger. It's like an author's picture. He's leaning on his hand. It looks like James Adomian, chewing Logan Roy. Oh, yeah, I could see that. Not bald enough.

Sure. I say that with great respect. He's kind of, it's hard to say because it's, he's got black background. He's a sorcerer, his head may be floating. Yeah, his head is floating. That's what it is. His head and hand are floating.

Or it's a black turtleneck. Yeah. The website, this is Jason Miller's Strategic Sorcery. It says, I have devoted 30 years to studying practical magic in its many forms. I've written five books, including the now classic protection and reversal magic with cake. Cool. I teach a number of,

of courses online, including the Strategic Sorsary Training course, the Black School of St. Cyprian, and the Sorcery of Hecatee. Hecatee is a witch. I know that from Hades, too. I'm kind of all in on the Black School of St. Cyprian. Yeah. I was going to say this sounds like something you should be doing. I don't know how comedic this will be, but it does feel like just two words that you like,

strategy and sorcery. Yeah, I'm really into the Jason Miller lexicon here. he put his whole pussy in that one. Yeah. His whole sorceressy. Sorcercero and sorcery is squirting magic. I belong to a few groups,

traveled to a few magical places and been initiated into this and that, none of which is very important. Always good to put that in your bio. What is important is that I can do magic that actually works. That's such an important thing to put in your website. By the way, you're like,

This isn't some fake magic website. This is a real. My spells are real. It honestly should have been paragraph one. My question is, when do you, there must be a reason, but when is the K in magic? Because he's using both. Oh, maybe they're different kinds. Maybe it's like a, I don't know, proper noun, like a magic.

When we've read about it Enquira, the people who are for sure not fucking around put the K in it. Yeah, but he's using both. Maybe he means the card game when there's no K. Okay, so he's teaching magic cards that actually work. One hand washes the decks will not lose. This one is a real Fyrician Reaper. Red deck. I'm shaking my damn head.

Claire, that was a really good job, yes, ending the Magic the Gathering riff. I can't. All right, keep reading it. Our hearts went out to you. Okay. No, but. More to the point, my students tell me I teach them. magic that works. Maybe I can teach you to. If you really want a bullet list of my life and times,

keep scrolling. If not, dot, dot, dot. This is strategic sorcery. It is what my life has been about for nearly 30 years and I want to share it. Share it. My dirty life and times. Okay. Okay. You want the list. I love how he's doing like Gen X blog writing, but it's for magic. Stop. He's like really punishing me for reading the bullet points, but I want the bad enough. He is the fast and dirty lowdown. He is the fast and dirty lowdown. He is the fast and dirty lowdown. We're talking about Jason Miller.

It's not cora.com. It's strategic sorcery.com. You may know him as the fast and dirty lowdown. Bull point one, strange experiences when I was just five years old led me to believe that there was more to reality than what we typically agree upon. These experiences stopped when I was around six, but the impression that. that we are all on a stage, and there is a lot going on behind the curtains that we cannot see, never let me. Interesting metaphor there. So when you're on a stage as an actor, you do know what's going on behind the curtains because it's just the people, it's like the stage director. Yeah, they're rotating the props.

It's other actors changing their costumes. The phantom is back there. Things like that. It's not really like, no actors on stage, like I'm so scared of what's happening behind this curtain. Well, they would be if there was a phantom. Right. I will say that techies were sort of freaky. Yeah.

Any techies in your life? Horny little devils. Ghosts of teenage mastery. Did you do the play in high school, Claire? I did plays in high school, yes. You plays in high school? Tell us about it. It's Halloween, by the way.

Let's just say it's Halloween. Let's just say the techies were doing Invader's invoice. Oh, I bet. Constantly. So they were cool. They were really cool. I got your wardrobe. A nightmare before Christmas girls.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but I went to it all-girls school, so it was, you know, even scary. Did you do school play? No, but I loved Invader Zim. So I was like I did. Same thing. I didn't do it.

Again, and this was a great mistake of mine, I played sports every season. Yep, same. It did not make me good at the arts one bit. Nope. That's crazy. Then I went to school and got a degree. I did cross country and track. And then I went to school and got a degree in economics for some reason.

What are you running from? Exactly. And now I barely exercise and make no money. So neither of them really took. Maybe you were kind of like trying to teach us a lesson or something. By doing all these things you wouldn't need later. Yeah, I think I just learned to hate them early on. Oh, okay.

Yeah, I'm not running anymore. Running sucks. Running is the worst. you could do. Even when I was like really good at it, it was oh my God, what a nightmare. On the wrestling team, we often, we talked about you guys like as a warning. Like you could end up on the track team. I love competing is the thing. Competition is fun. Oh, sure. But the running aspect. I mean, talking about magic. I was competing at my card game last weekend. I won, I won the whole thing I'm number one. We can't talk about this. A magic card game? It was flesh and blood, which is two things you also need for magic.

It seems like actually barely related. The fantasy trading card game. Oh, so. Speaking of Quora, I won my card game. Aren't you all proud of me? Well, are you or not? Very proud of you. Because it's the best day of my life. I'm very proud of you, Alex. Thank you for saying that, and I can tell you mean it.

I think I said this when you texted me about it. Well, I didn't think you meant it then. And I wanted to tell Claire about it. Keep reading this. Bullet point two. At 15, I started studying anything I could get my hands on about magic, even though I lives in a fairly rural area of New Jersey. somehow...

Me lives in a fair... And the same... Not me living in New Jersey. Somehow, between the ages of 15 and 19, I managed to find a mentor in Western magic. Thank you, Blanche. Blanche. Blanche.

How French is Blanche? Merci, Boconche. A mentor in root work. Thank you, Walter. Merci, Walter. And make... And make contact, Walter, and make contact with the first Westerner ever ordained as Ngaqpa, a sorcerer with Tibetan Buddhism, Lama Vajranatha.

I owe you more than anyone. Merci, Naga, ma'a. You know Lama Vrajanatha feels so good reading this about me on strategic sorcery.com. I got a mention. Oh my God, more than even Blanche. Guess what? Guess what, Walter? Surely not more than your root work mentor.

Walter. Keep going. In my 20s, I was initiated into a coven that worked witchcraft along the lines of mastering witchcraft, joined the Ordo Templi Orientis and the Cothonic Oranian Temple. So now we're into the LinkedIn section. In my mid-20s, I took my first tantric initiation into Vradra Kalia. Navadra Kilaa. Badrakelaia.

I devoted the next several years to the study of tantra and Himalayan magic in general. Hibalayan. Himalayan. Say it American. It's Himalayan. Himalayan. Hat and saddle. Himalian.

You're all hat and you've got one cow. If it wasn't for Lama Badranatha, at in nowhere. I was so surprised I was wrong. I looked up the script to the movie Lone Star to see. if that's what they said and they did. That's a shame. I was just dead wrong.

I really was rooting for you. I know so little about cowboys that I was just like, they're just words to me. I felt like you were my root work mentor, the way I was rooting for you to win. Thank you, Walter. Thank you, Walter. Thank you, Walter. So he's moved to Nepal in 1999. Great year to live in a flag.

You got to be in Nepal. One of the coolest flags out there. You're safe from Y2K and multiple. Two triangles. I'd have to look it up. In late 2000, I returned. turned to the states and began widening my focus into the wider world of magic and specifically about how I and others can get more out of our sorcery. That year, I also started a practice

centered around the goddess Hecatee that eventually blossomed into my Sorcery of Hecatee course. That's when I met my beautiful wife, Hecatee. The goddess, the Greek goddess. Thank you, Walter. In 2005, I was consecrated bishop in a line of independent Catholicism and began a line of long relationship with St. Cyprian eventually bossed me into the black school course. I've never heard of indie Catholicism. That's kind of cool. That kind of sounds alt. Yeah.

Yeah, dude. I'm so sick of mainstream Catholicism. Not me. I can't get enough. You fucking, it's just all superhero cape slop for you. Basic cat slop. If you're not into the main Catholicism, Protestantism's over there. That's kind of how I feel like.

It's about going indie. Either you think the Pope rocks. I'm on R slash indie heads posting about independent Catholicism. I'm going to services in someone's basement. No. I'm going to services in the Lord's basement. Yeah, I was at this really cool indie church with the this is Laurel I the other day. That's cool.

They often have many concerts in church. What's the black school? I don't think that's a racial thing. I'm not allowed to ask. Oh, okay, fair enough. That's not for us. It's not. In Massachusetts, they were talking about these all the time.

I went to the white school. There were kind of two different kinds of schools due to segregation of the 60s. I've been teaching courses since 2009, it says. Nice. Okay, so a lot of this got pretty, like, teacher-e. I want to hear more root work kind of stuff. Making fun of sorcerers. It's sort of high-risk, low reward.

Low reward. Because if, like, it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, great. You got to spend 20 minutes of your podcast reading a website. How fun. He'll kill you with Black Vashic. You'll be pulled into the earth by bones. You've cursed Hekatee. Hope you got a lot of upboats for that one on your P-Cast.

He seems cool. I think he's awesome. The tabs at the top. He does seem cool. We're going to testify. I want to make love to him. So this is under a bout and it says testify with an exclamation point. So under bio is Testify.

This is what people say about my work. So these are quotes from supporters, from clients. What do you call it when it's apprentices? Well, we don't know that they're apprentices. Although if they're out of school, they probably are. Good point, Jeremy. I have been able to do wonderfully magical things, and my kingdom has blossomed into paradise.

That's a rave review. Have you ever gotten a review like that at your fucking workouts? I mean... My kingdom has blossom into paradise? People have left nice reviews, but no one has had it. a kingdom, I don't think. Not even one. By the way, you can leave a nice review for the Quaraders podcast on iTunes.

Can you actually, can several people just put this word for word in our reviews? Yeah, please. I have been able to do wonderfully magical things and my kingdom has blossomed into paradise. Five stars for Quaraders. And it's got to be five stars because any less than that. It's only psychos leaving the reviews unless we demand you do it. So more of you go do that. Go do that.

You can also talk about whatever other thing we talk about on here, Claire, you do a carrot or whatever. Yeah, I don't care what you do. Oh, yeah, who cares? We have one, one star review that just says carrot on it. Right. That was so funny. If you can't handle me at my carrot, then you don't deserve me at my kingdom blossomed into paradise.

That's right. That's exactly right. Your kingdom deserves to fall into ash. What do people want from a podcast? That's one of the funniest things you can do in the audio medium. Is eat a big carrot? He'd Big Carrot. Whatever.

Folks money did it. Everybody loves him. Everyone thought it was so based. You know what it was? I'm looking at the review now, and it's from Elmer Fudd. Oh. He's an aider. He thinks it's rabbit season.

Actually, I think he thinks it's Wabbit season. Oh. Yeah. He's from Massachusetts. I can't speak to that. Oh, all right. Well, four years ago, I started strategic sorcery and made an investment in my future.

I didn't know it at the time, but I had been led to the most effective sorcery course available. Oh, that's great. Applying the lessons, truly doing the work. Do the work. And I've been able to do wonderfully magical things. And my kingdom has blossomed into paradise. Again, more and more, they're saying it.

Oh, no, this is the, that was the excerpt from before. The mix of magic with mundane techniques is simple and superb. All you have to do is apply yourself in simple ways and the change can be phenomenal. New job. Got that. Salary bump. Got that. Got that.

You got a new job to end up. That doesn't end up. Oh, baby. The house I always wanted with land, temple space. Hmm. Super friendly local spirits. I got that. Got that.

Yeah. Spirits. Yup. Talking to angels. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Shall I go on? You rarely hear yupp after conjuring spirits.

Yeah. And talking to angels. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Honey. I want DMX doing an uh-huh on the soundboard. That's a good one.

How about, uh, How about who got not only a big bonus? The weird sentence. How about who got not only a big bonus? But got everyone in the company won. Not enough time to meditate. An entire corporation is now implementing weekly meditation meetings in the office. My office.

What kind of corporation is this witch working? This would genuinely piss me off if I was like, I had an office job and they made me do fucking like mandatory meditation time because someone took a course in black magic. How good is my sorcery class? We work got a bonus across the board. I just like that it's like magic is just sort of going to HR to be like, hey, could we maybe potentially do weekly meditations? And I'm like, okay.

Sure. It gave me the confidence. If you stop doing rituals with your period blood in the bathroom, we will do whatever you want. Please. In four years time, I live in a different world. I'm a different person, and I did it with strategic sorcery. I can continue, but seriously, this is what you've been searching for.

The cost is unreal for what you get. The strategic sorcery community is a group of real workers, friendly and willing to help workers. You will not find a better magical group online. I am in several, and there's no comparison. No drama, no bullshit. Real magic, real results. Strategic sorcery will change your life, period. The Holiest Preacher.

I'm getting a lot. Percher. Oh, what do they say? This is the holiest percher. You made it make more sense. That's also their own website, Theholiest percher.com. We're going to click that as well.

This reads exactly like a lot of the chain emails I get from like kettlebell people. Right. This is business mindset for magic. This is just how you talk about. This is like LinkedIn brain for doing spells. Do you want to go to the holiest percher.com? Absolutely. I think it's just funny.

Strategic Sorcery if it wasn't. about magic you'd think is like a consulting company that helps make your Excel spreadsheets 10% more efficient. It also does that. You know what I mean? It uses the devil. But it is like they use magic for it. It untaps God's holy energies. All right, we're going to, uh, his website doesn't work. Holy Spirit is down. Something bad has happened to the holiest percher. All right. Let me check. They have crossed a spirit that has destroyed their kingdom. Just real quick, I'll check the way back machine on account of we are on the computer. Is it strange that I'm slightly afraid of you like opening a spirit into the room?

No, you're often afraid of that. You're often afraid of that. But that's okay. This seems like it was last active in 2016. Zoom and enhance. So I love the way back machine. Dude, what a fun. That's crazy you could do this shit.

I didn't even know about this until you way back to so many different things. Well, you know, it's taking a, they're trying to get rid of it. People are trying to shut it down. Really? Yeah, because it's like, you know, it has content. People want off the web. So this appears to be a blog of some kind.

Fingernails and foot trails. How to have a better life. Planetary magic, where would I begin? Yeah, this is just a blog from 2015. Start with Earth. And they have an Instagram, holiest percher on Instagram. Should we check that out?

Yeah, you might as well see if that's still around at least. I mean, that's kind of become the main social media site since then. I doubt anyone else would have used this. Holyest percher. Yeah, there's still. There's a crow with spirals for eyes, and they've done three posts ever. Yeah. I have spotless, tranquil, pure consciousness, and beyond nature.

They're probably just stalking baddies on here. Yeah. The way we all are. Cool stuff. All right. Well, that's holiest percher. Let's go back to the strategic sorcery. I mean, there's so many things.

Modern Fortune Tower also wrote a review. Okay. It is catered specifically to people like us, magical people. who know that monetary circumstances can be changed with sorcery. So it is financial stuff. These are just really long reviews. Like, I would leave a shorter review for this. I'd be like, the magic works.

That would be the review. This guy wrote. This guy wrote. V.M. wrote, sometimes I almost wonder if I am not neglecting other parts of my magical education by having my problem solved so relatively easily this way. The thing is, it fucking works. The magic fucking works. Language.

It fucking works. You kill a lamb and your dreams come true. This is a really good quote. I want people to write all of these quotes in our reviews of Quarators. Write these down. What Bruce Lee did when he made Jit Kundo, Jason is doing with Strategic Sorcery. Now, do you think after you read Jit Kundo, you're supposed to say Jason is starting to do with strategic sorcery? I fuck off.

Because that's a damn headline. Good one. Thanks, Claire. Good one, Alex. I'm in hell and it's Halloween. Wow, what a great thing that Jason is doing with strategic sorcery. Should we look up some of his things? Courses?

I'd like to hear more about the courses and then we can go to Quora a bit. Arcane audio. See, now you're getting into podcasting. Yeah, he's podcasting. I got to protect my turf here. Classes typically run two to three hours, including the lesson in Q&A. So these are one-off classes. These are one-off classes.

You've got to pay these. These are $60 each, and there's like $40 of them. I mean, you do the classes and then you get magic. So I think it's probably worth $60. Things like the secret sorcery of Mary Magdalene. This is how much a video game was. Saint spells, protection magic. I started my career.

It's a Baphometter here. How much are video games now? $70. $60 or $70. I mean, they're trying to make them $70. The thing is everything costs more in like the last three years. Yeah, it's bad news. Yeah, I've noticed.

Egg. Egg? What with Egg and doll and the sexual punching part of it? Right. But you know, sorcery always seems to stay the same age. Sorcery stays the same age. I agree. Sorcery of the Psalms.

Talismans. You got to have a whole class on talismans. Rich craft of the house of Helios is removed because it is being reworked. Talismans capture power and hold it in place. It may be a spirit a moment in time, the influence of God or a gift of nature. I didn't know that about those. I didn't either. That's cool.

It's really good to know. What a haunting discovery. The sorcerer's flame. These are all magical options in the audio download section. Exorcism is what you do when the shit hits the fan. I would love if these were $55 like last year. And then he sent out an email that was like, sorry guys. But there's inflation that's $60 for the audio crisis.

I've used a spell and the spell says it's got to be 60 now. I'm so sorry. To upgrade the spell. The spell gave me Joe Biden. Oh, geez. He's an anti-Biden guy. He's an anti-Biden guy. Well, I don't know if you remember.

Let's go Brandon. Now my spells cost too much. 2024. Like, people would just say that. Yeah. Next to their magic course. He should have used a spell on Joe Biden to keep him from dying out there. He was like falling apart.

Everyone tried to do sex magic on Joe Biden and it took out his soul. Read this description for Exorcism, the Sorcerer's Flail. This is Exorcism, the Sorcercerer's Flail. Not all spirits you will encounter are ones that you sought out. Not all spirits you seek out will be. be as friendly as you thought. Not all spirits will go away when you tell them to. Exorcism is what you do when the shit hits the fan. The chapter on exorcism in protection and reversal magic does not actually contain a ritual for exorcism. It is there basically to say this is the next

level of escalation, but you should not attempt this from a book. Why the reluctance? Because even more than cursing is dangerous and easily abused, yet it's foundational practice for a lot of magic and last resort when things pushed back against us. For $60, you can send the witch back to hell. I actually agree with that. Send her to hell. Exorcism is more dangerous than cursing. I don't really understand.

Can you exercise people? Is that the problem? I don't know. What if Jessica Chastain is other mommy in my house? A kid I grew up with at school got exercised. My wife was exercised. Yeah, well, she had a ghost. But it was a group.

I told this story. I don't really think a group exorcism works. They exercised her whole school one day. Who did? My wife went to a Catholic school for all girls. He's avoiding the details because he's scared. And I'm not scared at all. I'm happy to have a demon-free wife.

Were they getting exercise because their skirts were too short or something like that? I think like they had an assembly and the assembly person went rogue and the school didn't know it was going to happen. And he exercised the whole school. Start shooting the holy water out of it. He just, he went, he kind of went nuts and started exercising everybody. And I'm happy, you know, it's like, hey, can't hurt. It's better safe than sorry. Right.

It's the sorcerers flail. Yeah. It would be fun to sort of like goof on that guy and like pretend to. Yeah. Go out if I care of my there. You fucking pay that shit out. I would be afraid he would literally kill me. If I'm possessed by the if you pretended.

If the exorcism doesn't work. What's the next step? You would just start like beating the shit out of you. He's going to hit you. Devil boy. Devil boy. I do the damn car. Because of my skirt. I might go to jail, but the devil is gone.

Yeah, it's better safe than sorry. Catholic school skirt length was a huge issue. They were, well, my wife's school had uniform, so there wasn't really much skirt. Well, that's where it happens. The skirts was the uniform. This is important. I don't know about this shit. This was an all-girls school as well.

It was an all-girls school. And every time I met someone from that school for several years, they would bring up that they were exercise. And I was like, bitch, I know. You were all exercise. It happened to everybody. Y'all bitches went crazy. You got exercise.

Yeah, y'all girls went nuts out there. If you didn't want to be exercised, you shouldn't have been acting like that. Shit hit the fan. That's what you do, exorcism. It's the sorcerers flail. Now, let's go to courses here, because I'd like to hear more about the black school. Okay. I forgot about the black school.

St. Cyprian. There he is. St. Cyprian. It's literally a picture of a black guy. I did not expect that at all. He could be all kinds of things. Things. St.

Siprian? He could be Italian as hell. He's from Sicily. He could be from Cyprus. I'm looking up. Now, dude, this is a black priest. I can't. He says he's from Barber descent.

And he's from Carthage. Not my Carthaginian ass. He's from North Africa, bro. Perhaps as Carthage. I just, when he said black school, I assumed that he meant black magic. And I thought we were being. I think that's what he means. I think we were being really funny.

And he just happened to be a black guy. Maybe you're right. I think. I think we were being really funny. Can the tools of... Read it, read it. Church be used to work sorcery? Can a sorcerer be saintly?

Can the grace of Christ wash over you while the light of Lucifer rises from within you? We say yes! Three exclamation points. And then classes begin on April 28th. I don't know what year this was for. The first article I ever wrote about St. Cyprian was back in 2007. I wrote it to fulfill a pact with him, one that sparked a series of teachings that have spanned the last 11 years,

in which I now feel ready to share with you under his guidance. I was told to offer these teachings under the title of the Black School, which relate to legends that have spread from as far south as France and Portugal to as far north as Iceland and Norway. Okay, so as far south as France. It sounds like Europe. This school has the reputation of being overseen by the dead. devil himself, but other legends tell that it is a secret school that teaches the wisdom

of St. Sapry and the social saint. What now? Yeah, the part with, oh, by the way, you're going to get a lot of pushback that this is the devil's school. It's not. What did you just say? They're always saying that he contributes his lies. He's a friend

of the pod. Has what reputation? This is like when you talk to comedians who are like still friends with like sex criminals. Yeah, you may have already raped a bunch of people, but whatever. It really teaches a wisdom of St. Cyprian. St. Cyprian is at

the comedy store every week. In more practical terms, but you will be learning our techniques and methods that St. Cyprian has communicated to me over the last 11 years in which I have tested and am convinced work very well indeed. This is going to kill us. They have played a large part in my own success

and I am thrilled to finally be able to share them with you. And then again, more people being like, wow, St. Cyprian, save my marriage. Oh, it has the lessons from it. Great. You don't even buy it. You can just, these are the lessons. These are the names of the lessons. The cave cross and skull.

I don't know what that means. Two is the three nails and three oils. Mm-hmm. Yep. Three is the father of the first flame. I love that one. You're basically the father of the first flame. Four is the book in the bindings.

Right. Five is the baptism of demons. Again, I see why people think Satan is involved in this. Six, the Ostensorium. It's sort of his school. He is... These are emailed to you, by the way. He is the Morning Star.

Six is the Ostensorium exorcism and evocation. Seven, the spells, seals, and seeing. Eight, St. Justina and the Cauldron of Miracles, which is bolded. Nine, Cyprianic necromancy, also bolded. Ten. The goat. No longer bolded. The goat, the serpent, and the great angel.

So 8 and 9 must be the best ones. Yeah, those are the good ones. But with the Caldron of Miracles. You must complete the sign. Sign in to get the lesson. You need to do the sign in. Monthly for five months. That's the payment plan if you can't afford the spells right away.

If you can't afford the spells, maybe you're not ready for the spells. Yeah, that makes sense. Maybe do lesser magic get your money up first. Here's some magic you can use is called Compound Interest. His book is called The Elements of Spell Crafting. Cool clever. It's on Amazon. He's got another book called,

the sorcerer's secret strategies and practical magic. Sure. I mean, we did that Quarators Plus recently about the book of Enoch. Yes. And again, just looking at this picture is like, this would be cool if it's an actual leather cover. But if it's just paper and it looks brown, that shit's going to sell. It's a book about real magic. It's not impressive to have in your house.

Would the design looks textured, but isn't? It's like they couldn't afford the textures. I'm sorry. You will learn how to attack problems from multiple angles, not just by casting a spell. That is not why I'm buying this. Here to cast the spell. I don't want to learn how to communicate better with my partner. The sorcerer's secret is like writing a list of wants and dislikes or whatever.

Don't tell me the magic of counting to 10. It's on Amazon. It's got 7145 stars or whatever. $43 for a paperback. Is it paperback? Yeah, it is. Look at that. It's shiny.

This is exactly what I was warning about with the cover. This is what Alex warned of us. It looks textured, but it's not. It's just print. I won't you of such things. This has good reviews. This person blacked out parts of the book for some reason. He works for the CIA.

He's just addicted to doing that. Yeah, that's the part where he kills Martin Luther King. Okay, so he's given it a three stars. Three stars, intentions were okay. He says, I've never done this before. I normally highlight and put some sticky notes on pages of interest. Yes, it bled through the back, made sure it wouldn't go on the next page, but somehow I don't feel bad.

off the bat and about after the introduction the sorcerer explains the reasoning for choosing the term sorcerer. I have no issue with this. I didn't need until the author also used sorceress and realized they chose a term and they didn't, that they don't consider or use in a gender neutral way. Then they go to use magician, a term not used for witchcraft is associated with being admittedly fake. Okay. I'm going to say this is a woke review. Yeah. This review is woke. This is a review. It's long.

It's long. This is a book that's a review that's like the book is too anti-woke because Sorcer only refers to men. A Democrat left this review. B wrote this. Thank you, B. A damn B wrote that. Joe Biden has done the spell to make egg nine dollars.

Five stars, foamy. I like that we could see what they purchased. What is foamy? I'm looking. Stretchy. They gave five stars to this adjustable steel wire, tangle-free jump rope. Oh, I mean, that looks like a good jump rope.

It's foamy. Oh, wait, so the foamy wasn't about the book. No, this is five reviews, or sorry, six reviews that B gave things. Oh, okay. Never mind. I thought he was calling the book foamy. Isn't it just fun?

We can see what this woke sorcerer is writing about? No, we're off text now. Why is your mom buying one million dice? That's my brother-in-law. Look how many dice. He needs these. What is happening? This is like hundreds of dice.

I understand that he needs that. We don't know which ones he got. He might have gotten less. Don't look at his dice. I'm going to get in trouble because you're always showing everyone my family's purchases. It's just funny that he has in his cart hundreds and hundreds of colored dice. We don't have our own Amazon Prime account. We share.

Pay for your own stuff, guys. No. I need to spend that on dice. Okay, well, that's strategic sorcery. I feel like we've gotten enough out of the site of the week. It's a spell school that works. We didn't even go to the homepage. Oh, I thought we were on that.

Okay, so this is a guy. He's meditating, and I guess we have now learned he's probably talking to the devil. Do you think that he's on, like, Instagram or anything like that or no? Why you want to have sex with him? I want to hear his voice. I don't know what Instagram's for. I don't like it. Okay.

Well, then you've got to purchase Arcane Audio files. Oh, yeah. It's like 60. Oh, he's on YouTube. And someone wrote on R slash witchcraft that he's the real deal. Okay, I could actually go to R slash witchcraft for a minute. I'll be honest, the Quora's, like, they're not the strongest. This is R slash witchcraft.

This is a special Halloween episode. You should be thinking me. I mean, I kind of want to call a strategic sorcery, but I don't know if that'll be like. Like, just said, yeah. Copyrighted. No, I just don't know if it's a beacon for a man who works with the devil to come find us. You do not want to run into Jason Miller in court. He has many law demons that work.

Yes, well, it's me, Lucifer. Looking at the code here, you violated copyright. I can't hope but notice the prosecutor is a pile of smoke. Objection. Speaking with the voice of thunder itself. Your Honor, I'm being prosecuted by half a goat. Just quomping around the courthouse. Members of the jury.

This is a case of goat hockey. That's what I call it instead of horse hockey. He's like a folksy lawyer. He kind of relies on his back country skills. Anyway, so this is Jason Miller, V on our witchcraft. Two years ago, read this. Okay. parentheses.

I swear this is not a special. sponsored or an ad, L.O.L. I just get so much out of this book that I felt my civic duty to share LOWL. Lap out loud. Oh, G. I just read, consorting with spirits by Jason Miller, and I have never read an occult text that clears up more about spirits and working with them than this. It de-mistifies so much. I've been practicing for 10 years, and it is still cleared up a lot for me. This book is especially helpful for devotees of Hekatee and Lucifer. Come on. I do not want trouble with these people. I don't want to name it that. They only need to kill Jeremy.

I have a family. I think it's cool. I'm excited to keep doing the exercise from the book. I did the Spirit Feast on Depnon last night. Hey, man. Hey, I'm Jewish. We do this kind of stuff all the time. We support.

We support. Hey, we love the Spirit Feast. Oh, no. All of the spirits are loose. We love what you do with Lucifer, by the way. He's so frightening. I fell from heaven myself once. Okay.

I thought it was heaven. It was actually a small staircase. My new character, Jewish Mr. Magoo. Oh, no, I can't see. Okay. So I did the spirit feast on Depnod last night. I got some response as even a little light flicker. If you want to develop relationships with spirits around you

and learn how to approach them, I cannot recommend it enough. He's also going to tell you you should have knowledge and basic protection and reversal magic before you get into it, so consider that too. If anyone has read it, I'd love to hear your experiences. What's the discourse on this? Top comments, I have his book protection,

reversal of magic. I really like it. And that's from a flair who's a broom rider. Broom rider. This is R slash witchcraft folks. This is someone who rides a broom. These are the daughters of the witches they didn't burn. I just love love says. Who is a witch? I'm taking his sports and Rebecca D.Course and yes, Jason is the real deal and I'm loving his class.

I also have both those books too and I've gotten results with them. So Alex, I mean, you have a sort of witchy wife, right? Your wife isn't a witchy stuff. That's right. Is she doing spells though? No, she hasn't taken any courses, which is where I draw the line. Right. And I think it's where she draws line because she is, again, afraid of,

demons and other realm and spirit. She doesn't want to invite any more demons into her home. Yeah, she's afraid of opening the door that cannot be shut. For sure. And she hasn't paid for the course to get rid of them because they don't tell you how to do that. They just get you the steps up to it. I'm just too red at atheists for all this. I just don't believe in anything.

I know. You're too bit flying spaghetti monster. I know. Even like enjoy this. Which is a delicious type of God. I mean, this is pretty much making you team Lucifer. how much you're into it. Control F. Lucifer on this page.

Yeah, control F. Jamie. Control F. Lucifer. Now, this is your first episode of the show. This is something we do every week. Control F. Lucifer. Sure. I just look. There's a whole subsection about working with demonic spirits

outside of the Christian dichotomy. There's a whole hymnal prayer to Lucifer without reference to his place in the mythology of Christianity. Oh, do you know Lucifer's other works? Hey, man. Separate the art from the artist. I know Lucifer mostly as a glass blowing artist. I know that people don't like that he, like, tortured, you know, all sinners for all humanity.

I don't like that he created the land of fire and lives in it with tortured souls. I just like his spells. He's got cool hoofs. He offers a protection spell for those who work with demons called the devil's refuge. No, don't use that. You provided that along with the first thing I've ever heard. That's one refuge I will not mess around with me. He does say that.

that you can invoke Archangel Michael to help with constraining unruly spirits. Archangel Michael mentioned. I am Michael. I am Michael. He also said he gets hate for not bringing God into his demon conjurations, in fact. I bet.

What is this in response to someone being like, I hate Jesus? No, they're talking about asmodious. Someone says someone's criticizing him by saying he's very Christian-centric. And then this guy's like, n-uh, he loves the devil. It says it's incredibly disrespectful

to use solomonic man. That's not how you make friends with a demon. And that's from arts a fart. This is why we are in the weeds on this. This is the stuff you need to know. What is Solomonic magic? Demons do not like it. I know King Solomon.

Something about King Solomon, I'm assuming. Was he doing magic? Hence Solomonic. Probably. Or maybe it's like during his time. Oh, maybe you're right. I mean, it could be so many different things. The age of Solomon.

I just like that this seems like a pretty contentious fight going. Yeah, there's discourse happening. It's like left-up-fart is really clapping back. It's the circular wand. Wait, hold on. Let me do this again. Yeah, come on. Circular firing wand.

This feels the same to me as when I see people on Twitter arguing about like some DSA votes. Do you see what I mean? We're voting on whether to vote for it to endorse AOC in a year. And I'm just like, you guys need to shut the fuck. fuck up. Right. Well, often those get into like strategic decisions. Yeah, strategic sorcery. You're supposed to be in the email to get those. I know. Keep it off of Twitter. Put it in a great chat I'm not in. Twitter is for trying me to lie to large groups of people and that's it. Twitter is for Nazis to send me pictures of my family. Well, that's the only way I can find them.

I print them out and hang them up. I go, hey, it's my dad. Oh, wait, I want to read this paragraph. He says in the book that he did fuck up with Osmodius when he was young and took full responsibility for that and does not go out of his way to say one should be forceful citing his own mistakes he made when he was too forceful with Osmodius

and he later summoned Osmodius in a more friendly way. This is like cancel. This is cancel culture. Yeah, I know that he did do that whole Osmodius thing but that was like 15 years ago you know, people changed.

He's done the reading about what Osmodius likes. He donated like $200 to a a charity for solomonic magic. Anyway, the second time he summoned him, he noted a shift in his demeanor specifically because he was friendlier. So the thing is, if you mess up with Osmodius,

Asmodius. Asmodius. You have to do the work. It's your turn to do the work. Okay, I'm looking it up. Google Asmodius. It's not my job to tell you. Oh, he's a prominent demon and king of demons.

Of demons. Embodiment of lust. Oh, look at this guy. And destruction of marriage. He's got, he's, what is his face? Women love as modius. Human head, cow head, goat head and lion, uh, head. They want, all of one guy.

They got, like, 10 different legs. Here's the thing is, if you're a guy and you're under six feet and you don't have a cow's head and a goat head and a lion head and a serpent head, you don't stand a chance on the sexual marketplace. Whenever we like find these things, I just feel like I'm so in over my fucking head. Yeah. There's just so much happening. Imagine how it would feel if you summoned Asmodius.

In the fucking Legends of Solomon. Can we get this guy in my red chair in my living room? No, we can't get him in. He's in the damn Talmud. He's in the Quran. He's all over the purse. Let's take a step back here and read the Wikipedia for Asmodius and do the work. Read it.

Read it. It's Halloween. It's the day of frights. Happy birthday. What do we have a message on? What of a notification on Wikipedia? I think it's because you changed fucking Claire's bio the other week. I'm going to check that.

I'm going to check that after. Read this. Asmodius is a king of demons in the legends of Solomon and the construction of Solomon's temple. He is associated with lust. Verification needed. Same. He is featured variously in Talmudic stories where he is the king of the Shedim, Jeremy. Yeah, I agree.

The Quran refers to a puppet in the story of Solomon and Suram. Rossad versus 30 through 40, which is according to the Moose Faurin, referring to the Demon King as Modius. In Christian, so he's like in many different universes here. He's like an Avengers Endgame Quran verse. Yeah, he's in the Book of Tobit. He's in Guardians of the Galaxy Talmud. He's one of the antagonists and disrupts the marriages of Sarah.

Oh, no. Not Sarah. He's probably coming to Sarah and he's like, you see my lionhead? Sarah. Sarah. Sarah. Look at my horse head too. Okay, so someone left us a message.

It says, welcome to Wikipedia and thank you for contributions. Oh, they would not be thanking us if they saw the things we did. Yeah, I don't really know why they're deviating. Oh, is this a warning? Yeah, disturbs uniformity among articles and may cause readability or accessibility problems. Please take a look at the local. So they're mad at us. Right.

That we didn't use the manual of stock. Well, because you went on the Gen Z stare page and said Claire invented it. Well, I think she did. No, she didn't. And I think it is in my account, Jeremy, which you are not allowed to ruin. You are acting much as Asmodius does. I don't they deleted it. I think we included, you included something like Claire O'Kane just found out about this.

Right. The Gen Z stare. I believe I still am featured in the Wikipedia Patriot. I'm just hoping we didn't get you. I just want to. Firm that Claire is still there. He is the king of lust. We're not going to read the Wikipedia for fucking Edomodius.

I didn't learn anything yet. Jesus Christ. I think we should go back to R slash witchcraft. You're right. Yeah. How much do you want to read about the etymology? Skip past the etymology. Now we're on the Deuteronomical sources.

Great. And the book of Tobit. This is Wikipedia, Wicked, media. You need to understand this before you try to read the book of Tobit. Asmodius is hostile to Sarah Regel's daughter and slays

seven successive husbands on their wedding nights impeding the sexual consens, first of all, that's a rough go. Yeah. Who's getting in line for that, by the way, being like, well, he's not going to do seven. Imagine being the sixth husband, just like, now I know the first five of us were killed

by Asmodius. Sarah's so high. It's worth it. It's worth a go. Can I look up Book of Tobit Sarah? We could judge if you would get in line. Oh, yeah. Have Grok turn her around.

I'm Google Imaging. Book of Tobit Sarah to see if she's hot enough that you would get, you would marry her after everyone else died. Alex? Yep. You got to do it. You got to. I can't help myself.

Wood, wood, wood. Oh, wait. There's one in their bed on their wedding. Night. I'm looking at Sarah and I'm sprung. I don't see the bad one, but I believe you. Right there. Oh, yeah.

Tobias and Sarah. She kind of looks like a mummy in this one, but... Yeah. It's still irresistible to me. All right, so the Dead Sea Scrolls don't mention Asmodius. The Testament of Solomon. Perhaps Asmodius punishes the suitors for their carnal desire. And then says speculation.

According to some translations, he gets strangled. And that one says, which and citation needed. Right, so that's a speculative. They're having arguments in this. Apparently Raphael binds him, so that could be a good way out of it if you need to get out of it. We should be reading this in order. How about you just treat Asmodius like you've been there before and it won't be a problem? We'd to read this in order.

So he's slaying all of the husbands. However, Tobias states that Asmodius is also in love with Sarah and does not harm her. In the New Jerusalem Bible translation, he has described as the, quote, worst of demons. Right. When the young Tobias is about to marry her, as Modius proposes the same fate for him, but Tobias is enabled through the counsels of his attendant angel,

Raphael. I am Raphael. To render him innocuous. He's down bad for the Sorosie. By placing a fish's heart and liver on red hot cinders, Tobias produces a smoky vapor, which causes the demon to flee to Egypt. Stinky vapor.

Wow. So there you go. Stinky vapor. That's what happens to old Asmodius. If you ever get in trouble with him, you got a boyfriend, you got another boyfriend, you got a third boyfriend. They're all named Igor. They're all getting killed. Get some red hot cinders, get a fish's heart and liver.

Put some fish on the Barbie. Oh, for our Australian-style. We had one exit review on the Patreon recently that just said, I am Australian. And I wonder what we said. What was the wise? We do a lot of Australian voices. It could have been any episode. It's with love.

I think Australians are way cooler than us. They have those mullets. We're just pulling your tit. Mate. Sarah. I'm yanking your saddle. Sarah, you have to marry me, Sarah. The Testament of Solomon.

So, yeah, I've seen enough on this. But let's go back to our witchcraft. I now respect Osmodius in a real way. Witchcraft is welcoming and exclusive. The banner image on our witchcraft. A lot of phases of the moons. Look up. Which is love the moons.

Is that wrong to say? Yeah, I mean, hey, they love that shit. I'm going to go top of the month. Top of the month to you. I'm an Irish witch. I'm a caregiver for people with dementia after seeing my pentacle. One of my clients made this. That's actually quite demonic of you.

A candy cottage of salty licorice and sea salted caramels. And that's with the flare salty Saturday. Okay, great. Which is long salty Saturday. These are getting good. These are going to good. Okay, here we go. A very angry and necessary PSA.

Let me open this one in a new tab. I'm feeling good about it. accidentally downloaded it. Why do you downbook? Don't worry about it. Just some spells. Why do I let you use my computer? Do you want to read this, Claire?

Sure. Okay. Excuse me. A very angry and necessary PSA. I wrote this earlier today while very upset, but I think this desperately needs to be shared. Hi, so I need everyone to listen the fuck up right now. Okay.

If you are a witch, I do not give a gap. who you are or what you have or blah blah whatever before you so much look as look at a candle you need to learn basic fire safety if i see another full-ass fire on a glass or ceramic plate i'm going to launch myself into the sun and come back with a vengeance here's some very basic fire safety things that i want to you to value over all the absolute idiot shitheads on tic-tok with their crazy cord cuttings they're doing in their fucking houses. So this is all about candle

safety. Yeah, it's mostly just candle safety. Do you think that coming back from the sun thing is like a witchy threat? Like that's something that witches do sometimes. By the way, trim your wicks. You are not immune to fire. She said my house burned to the ground from a lit cigarette, not even

on the very bottom. Now a lit cigarette is kind of a toxic candle, as I understand it. Whoa. I was homeless for the better part of the year. I barely got out. Jesus Christ. And went back in for my sister. I did not narrowly survive being burned alive for y'all to act a fool. Your spell isn't going to do much for you when you're seriously injured, homeless, or dead.

Because again, you aren't immune to fire. Now, I know people whose houses are burned down, and they're often really passionate about fire safety. Also, by the way, if you like this episode, sign up for the Patreon because it's literally just this every week. This is a really good peek behind the curtain As to what's going on back there. We probably should put this on the Patreon. Yeah, you know what? Forget you heard this.

Oh, these poor witches. I also like this other one. How to find a deity, go looking. You will know when you find that. And then a webcomic. Yeah, webcomic. You really need to find God. And then a witch saying, I do.

And then the witch talks to like some sort of... It's like swamp thing. Some sort of swamp thing. And he says, I think you're doing great. And it's, if you're a witch, that's really funny to you. Yeah, that's really good. Because of your experiences. Right.

Trying to find God. Let's do a listener question. Okay. Okay. Spooky. I can't say no to you. I can't get enough of you. Oh, God, that's scary.

Read that top one. This one says this one's for you, Claire. I mean, we could do it. Hit the button, though. Okay. This is our listener question where we read Quora like question. on the air, please write to, please write to

Quarators at gmail.com. Try to keep your question under 30 seconds in our segment. Is that okay? Is that okay? Okay, this is subject line. This one's for you, Claire. It came in while we were reporting. It's from the person we did last week,

so I mean, it's probably fine. Hello, Corrators. I've got a question today for Claire because she wasn't very happy with my Dragon Ball question, so I wanted to do one for her, although I'm sure Alex and Jeremy will have something to add. So I used to be Polly. Maybe I still am.

I don't know. I've been single for six years. But what do you do when one of your partners is really good at like kissing an intimacy, but doesn't really want to do it too often? And you have another partner who's not very good at those things and really wants to do them often. How do I switch those up? I'd like to chime in here.

Goku was in this situation all the time. Son of a bitch. What an interesting question. I don't know. Cora answer. Thanks for writing. I don't know. I think you go to one for when you want a certain thing.

If you don't want the thing. I don't know. I don't know. The question is like... It's a bit of a conundrum. It's a bit of a how the bed is too small, bed too big. porch too hot, porch too cold,

but you're still in a nice warm house. You should just be grateful your house wasn't burned down. Can I just get the question straight that there's someone that you know who's really good at kissing

but they don't like kissing? Yeah, they're not, I guess, promiscuous very often. I feel like you just got to kind of have to kiss on their schedule, right?

Well, here's what you do about that. You say, you see the good kiss or less, wait until it's your birthday, wait until exciting moments in your life. you just won a very large card tournament

and everyone's really proud of you. Then you get the good kisses. Then on your week to week needs, we go to the kiss shop that's always open and we just run through the damn thing. Because we're addicted to kisses. I have a good pitch for you. Get the good kisser and the bad kisser

to date each other. And then when the bad kisser kisses the good kisser, be like, that good kisser is so good at kissing, right? We could both learn so much from them. Yeah, yeah. And then take those 10. techniques. All three of you could take a course.

Yeah, it's called strategic sorcery. I like Alex's idea of give them a reason to kiss you. Right. In the card game. Try winning for once. Like a card game or your birthday. Eat a lot of food like Goku. Is that something he does?

Yeah, he eats so much food, Claire. And there's often a reason to kiss him for he frequently saves the earth. Save the earth. So there you go. That's my. answer. Save the earth for once. Good luck with your solo

Polly journey. Keep rocking it out there. Keep rocking it out there. We'll see you next Halloween. The demon's going out. We can edit that out. I don't think I can.

We'll see you next Halloween. Wow. Wow, what an episode. What a spooktacular year of coronators. It's been. I'm so scared. I had a lot of fun out here today. My birthday coming up.

Tell me happy birthday. Happy birthday. If you would like to cherish Jeremy this year, one thing you could do is sign up to our Patreon on patreon. On patreon.com slash quaraders. For $5, you get a bonus episode every week. And now with our new exciting vertical Vixen's tier, you can get a whole movie episode every month

where we watch a silly movie mystery science theater style. For extra $5. And we're very rude and we talk over it. And you can listen to that and we'll try to describe it to you. And apparently that's how most people are hearing it. But you can also watch the movie with us. You can do whatever you want, honey. I don't make the rules.

You're a great good thing. It's rough stuff. You're going to love it. I think that's it. That's it. The rest is just, I guess, check your candy bars for razor blades and look out for gangs that are initiating because they're, they'll kill. On Halloween, they kill. Yeah.

Okay. And if you see a skeleton, just run away. That's right. Shout to out to Lucifer. I do not. Bye, bye. I do not reciprocate there. I do not.

Bye bye.