RAWTALK - Chet Hanks on the Illuminati, Finding God & Being Sent Away as a Child

Episode Date: June 5, 2024

0:00 Intro 0:20 Chet being in a good place in life 1:29 what god meant to chet 6:37 speaking about god 11:27 why have we gotten so far away from loving eachother? 13:58 how do you know god is real? 16:31 how do you know if you're in love? 18:59 finding the right path 20:49 where did chet see the biggest change 31:34 how did chet get in such a bad situation with the foundation he had and the pressure… 38:35 what was chet's childhood like? 40:52 chet got sent away as a kid and what the program was 48:14 what got chet away from god when he was 17 50:34 the drug problem chet had... 51:54 Illuminati meetings and the perception of it in Hollywood 53:38 being an extremely famous celebrity and what people don't understand 56:15 is the internet going to get better or worse? 1:04:16 covid and the rules... fake? The issues. 1:12:44 it's real life vs the internet 1:14:34 todays society 1:17:28 everyone's timeline is different 1:21:08 Chet is an actor, just recently filmed a show for Netflix 1:25:01 Chet is an artist as well, future music 1:26:06 chets hobbies 1:26:46 The value of the gym and what it teaches you 1:34:06 what people are afraid of 1:40:48 stay prayed up 1:44:24 how does brad deal with everything, life lessons, meditation & peace

I'm glad we're doing this. I'm in, like, a really good place right now. In life. Are you going? The cameras, too? Why do you say that? What's different now than, like, normal? I guess now is normal, but...

It's peace, bro. Like, yo, you got to describe what that means. Like, why? Why is it more peaceful now than fucking six months ago? six months ago I was at peace I found peace like a year ago but peace with what

like just yourself with everything especially myself yeah what did you have a hard time finding peace with prior though there was one thing honestly that changed everything

in your life yeah what and this is like kind of like we get right into it fuck it I mean you said it you just you got me thinking right away I was like I'm curious what he's talking about And it's like, it's crazy, dude.

Because, like, it sounds, it sounds, people have heard it all a million times, you know. It's nothing new, but it took me a long time to realize it. And what made all the difference was Jesus. Yeah. Jesus. So prior to that, you just didn't believe? No, I always, I always believed in God. And I always acknowledged Jesus, and I believed in Jesus.

I said I did. Yeah. But I didn't fully understand. Like what it meant to believe? I didn't understand. Well, there were some things that I didn't really agree with. Like what? With Jesus.

Like what happened, the story of? Well, the thing, the thing that always held me back from, like, fully getting into jesus was the turn the other cheek like i never agreed with that oh and someone do you fucking dirty you gotta like yeah i don't like i never thought like that it was wrong to reciprocate to try to be the karma to try to what to kind of be the karma like to be what because in that case you're talking about someone's doing something dirty to you you do something dirty to them back because like that's kind of how life well it was more so just like i'm not like a like a spiteful person when it comes to like doing people dirty but i'm just like if someone fucking

you know punches me in the face i'm gonna punch them in the face you know i mean like yeah not like oh i'm gonna fucking plot and like do you like i that's not in me but like i uh that kind of kept me from like fully just getting into christ but i didn't realize really what that was all about which is that Jesus was a gangster dude like he was extremely powerful not just with like whether you believe that he performed miracles and you know could do all these things and I which I do but whether you agree with that or not right um he was a powerful dude for his time period like he had he was a very controversial dude people were paying attention to what he was saying yeah he had this disciples the 12 followers but there were

he was a he was a political figure also yeah he was saying things that that was really shaking people up and he had a lot of people you know populations of people that were paying attention to what he was saying and if he wanted to he could have said overthrow the government take up arms go to war for me yeah he could have wielded his power easily like that with just a word not to mention he could perform miracles and rise from the dead and bring people back to life but he chose not to because he knew that in order for his message to spread he had to fulfill his destiny by allowing people to do whatever they wanted to him and he did that up until the end So I didn't, I didn't, I used to look at, like, the turn the other cheek is like a weak thing.

Like, that's like soft. Yeah. Or that's like pussy. Do you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Without realizing that he was the biggest, probably the biggest gangster that ever lives. You know what I mean? Yeah.

Being able to willfully allow it to happen. Exactly. Almost to be the example. Exactly. Because he knew that that was the only way that his message would spread. Yeah. And also because he didn't have a, of. of malicious or violent bone in his body just didn't even have he had nothing but unconditional love he

was unconditional love he was the embodiment of unconditional love like when i and i what i think like you know like you know people say like uh like how jesus said i am the way the truth and the life no one comes to the father through me right i think a lot of people you know get hung up on that and they say oh so are you saying that if i don't believe in jesus then i can't go to heaven heaven. What if I was, you know, what about other populations of people that that's not their heritage? They were raised Buddhist or Muslim or Hindu or whatever. Are you saying all those people are exempt from going to heaven? And I say, what you know, what you got to understand is that Christ spoke in proverbs and everything he said had layers of meaning. So when he's talking about

I, I don't, he's, I don't think he's just talking about him personally. He's talking about unconditional love because that's what he was the embodiment of. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it's, I think the whole thing is obviously we can't be God, we can't be necessarily Jesus in a sense, but we are, I guess, sort of to learn to see what that looks like to be the kind of best self we could be, no matter what we truly believe in or not. I think that's kind of what his actual embodiment showed, the way that he acted and the way that he was showed. Why do you think it's such a, it's almost feeling like nowadays it's like more of a taboo thing,

even though it isn't and it shouldn't be to like. like really speak about this kind of stuff i feel like it's weird it is weird isn't it's a weird time it's a very weird time it's like people get uncomfortable when you talk about christ or or god some people not everybody yeah you know like it is what do you think so but that i don't know man i think the world's kind of losing a little bit i think i think it's more people who probably align with the side of like kind of how you mentioned you weren't really buying the turn the other cheek thing and like actually laying down and like submitting and not in a way way that would make anyone weak but it's just kind of like the world i guess i guess what i'm trying

to say the world's a weird place now because it's always like everything just seems like a measuring game it's like if someone does this to me then i should be able to do this to them or like and then there's a whole sect of people that's you know speak about religion or religions in sort of like a weaponizing way like we can you know because this happened and i should be able to do like this or then they'll use it in like a way to sort of just garner attention and not really like embody the whole thing like people sort of pick and choose what they like to like I don't know identify with as far as like what a religion says you should or shouldn't do and then they'll like pick things you know like forever like I you know I was I grew up Catholic and I see kind

of how people are in the Catholic Church and how people are treated and then I grow up and I hear about like, you know, like the molestation and the type of shit in the church. It's like, why were any of these people sort of like disciples of any of this sort of religion when they're just like bad people? I just think religion for me when I was growing up and I'll get back to what I was saying about the world now. I always viewed it like, this can't be what it is. Because like if these are the people who are telling me this is how to be and this how to act and then they're bad people it always gave me this weird hypocrisy yeah the hypocrisy and it gave me a really weird like my logical mind was like this doesn't make sense so i'm i'm gonna distance myself from it because

if these people are religious but they're terrible humans then like what's happening like yeah where is that line phone and then nowadays it's like i don't know if it's like an influencer thing or just like a thing now for people to fucking combat on you combat it on the internet about like religions and this and that and it's like i feel like at the end of the day most of these religions all kind of go down to the same core values about like the idea of the golden rule like treat others as you kind of want to be treated and be good to people and then people pick parts or pieces that they like to identify with and then or they like the hypocrisy that they have in it where they pick this but then they're not doing that and then they're telling with someone that you're

bad because you're not doing the thing I'm doing but maybe they're doing the other thing that they're not doing but then it's like you see what I'm saying it's just it's like a weird obviously religion is so so deep and so rooted in like so many. many years for people so it's i don't know if it's harder for people to see it but well it is hard for people to see it because exactly what you're pointing out is that there's so much hypocrisy and organized religion yeah that um like the hypocrisy of organ that people see that's everywhere in organized religion will turn people off from having a relationship with god or with christ or with whatever you know figure that is associated with that religion yeah but really

that's so unnecessary, you know, because to me it's just common sense that like all organized religions, you know, at some point they become like a man-made institution. Yeah. And wherever there's mankind, there's going to be flaw in hypocrisy. And wherever mankind organizes anything, there's an institution, there's going to be flaw there. There's going to be hypocrisy. Government. religion companies you know conglomerates yeah money money any type of organization right and exactly what you're saying and i think that has turned off so many people because they they see the these hypocrisies and they see people you know twisting the message of like oh if you're going to do this and then you go to hell and it's like so it that's not really what that's not what jesus was about at

if you actually look at what he spoke and the words that came out of his mouth, he didn't say any of that shit. All he said, there's, there's two rules. I only have two rules for you. Love God more than anything, rule number one. And rule number two, love each other. Yeah. That's it.

Why do you think we've gotten, in your opinion, so far away from loving each other? Because that's like, that's the, core root problem in like human it's greed like the want for more the desire for more and then it's like the because of the desire for more people become sort of like enemies of your more so you have to treat people bad or climb on people or use people or it's like you know maybe that person doesn't know enough and I know more so I can leverage my knowing so I can get money it's this whole fucking well I think like it's human nature yeah and it's always been that way even since the time that jesus was walking around i mean look what they did to him you know what i'm

saying yeah of course so it's like it's it's still that way and it hasn't changed and because it's human nature because the human being is a really interesting creature because human beings have one foot in being an animal and one foot in being a divine entity and they have consciousness they have one foot in each door you know yeah we're half animalistic and we're half divine and it's that is the human experience in my opinion it's having the angel on one shoulder and the devil on one shoulder and you have and both of them are talking to you and you're trying to make the sense of what the fuck is going on which one am i listening to right now getting it all confused it's like this big fucking just cluster fuck right

of two polar opposite energies, the light and the dark. Yeah. And sometimes it's hard to tell which is which. And that's the human experience. Yeah.

And that's the human experience. And speaking for me, this is my story, right? Is that like I said, I always acknowledged God. I always knew God was real. I don't even like to say

I believe in God because you believe in fucking Santa Claus. You know what I'm saying? If you could believe, one minute you could believe and the next minute you don't believe. If you say not believe in something, then you're implying that there's

still room for doubt. There's no room for doubt in my knowledge of God's existence. Right? So I know God is real. Right. And I always acknowledge Jesus in my mind. How do you know God is real? And I'm not

asking that question to confuse it with he's not real. I know. It's a great question. Because that's the thing I've struggled with. That's a great question. I've struggled with that shit. That's my, because of humans, I think because of my answer to that, obviously I don't want to cut you up, but my answer to that when I think about it immediately is because I've seen so much like negative and bad shit in this world and like evil shit, it's like, God, I mean, if there's such evil, there has to be such good. And that's the only way I can really rationalize it. Also, how perfect the world is, outside.

of humans like even or even our bodies in the way it's set up the way everything is kind of just so interconnected and like perfect uh and the way the world works in this like complete synergistic fashion outside of humans obviously we come in to fuck shit up and take resources and whatever but the sustainability in it all and how like everything affects everything else so succinctly and that's where i go this there's no way this is just fucking randomly by mistake this shit just happened and some ball blew up and fucking created all these random atoms and they just created all this. It just, that doesn't, it seems, that seems insane to me. It does seem insane. I mean, to answer your question, how do you know God is real?

To me, it's just as simple as this, is that something cannot come from nothing. Something can only come from something. We all exist. We know that. You know you exist, right? I mean, as far as I'm concerned right now, you know, like, I'm aware of it. I think you exist. Yeah, yeah. My perception, for sure.

That's a whole other conversation. Even if we're living in a simulation, right? Yeah. We might be. But the simulation is still real to you. Yeah. Right? It's still real to me, right?

But imagine now you go out on that simulation room. It's like, imagine we're just plugged into this thing. We're like, well, that's the thing. It doesn't make any difference because even if we are living in a simulation, the simulation is still subjectively real to each one of us. Yeah. You know? So it's just as simple as that.

And then also as simple is that energy cannot be created or destroyed. Yeah, it continues. It can only change forms. But that's a good, I think that question is, how do you know God is real? Is that that is, that's a question that every person has to answer for themselves. Yeah. And however way they know it is entirely their own, it's entirely unique to them. And you really can't even describe it.

It's like, how do you know if you're in love? can't really put it in words. You know what I'm saying? You just know it or you don't. You know? Love's also an interesting thing where it's like, it's almost like you, it's almost like you know you're in love

as soon as you're not in that relationship anymore sometimes too. Like when it's gone. Yeah. That's a whole other thing. That's a whole other conversation I could talk about for hours. Yeah. Because like it's always like, it's like an in hindsight thing.

And I guess in our lifetime, like as far as God being like determinably like this is 100% real would be like in death right but i think it's also similar with the what the analogy you just said of love is like like you don't you don't realize what you had until it's gone right that's when the love becomes real why like what's so what's so wonderful and amazing and miraculous about god and god's grace is that like even when we look back in hindsight of our relationship with god like it's something we lost like we like we went like we went down a wrong path like oh man I was on such a good path then I went off the good path and I went down this wrong path right and I stepped away from God but it's so

interesting and this is the miraculousness of God's grace is that if stepping down that wrong path is what leads you to a greater understanding of God or your first realization of God then were you ever really on the wrong path to be right I mean that's that's like life in general with learning anything i think like there's god's grace to me yeah because even when we went down the wrong path god was still watching over so so much that it it was in hindsight it became the wrong it became the the right path all along yeah you know stepping stones because i've experienced that many times in my life i've gone down the wrong path so many times in my life and every time i went down the wrong path through pain and suffering I've always it gets to a point where it's so

unbearable that the only way the only escape is to is to turn to God and then by gating that higher understanding and higher stronger relationship with God it automatically sets you back on the right path and that's kind of life it's kind of like deviations from from the right path to the wrong, but each time you deviate and you, you'll become back with a fuller understanding, the path elevates. Yeah. I think the challenging part for people is recognizing that even when they're not on like the perception of the right path, whether they're able to come to God or to understand God

just in their life in general is to like recognize that getting to like a shitty spot in life can eventually turn into something positive. I think a lot of people get so caught up when it's shitty that it's, it's like they just keep spiraling down the shit. And they, whether it's a God thing or religion thing or a realization thing, people just perception wise, they get stuck in stuff and like,

you know, because I'll, I'll drive by and I'll see like people who do drugs and this and like, you know, LA's full of like a lot of those good characters. And you know, I'm always like,

how does someone get there? I'm always like, how did they get to this point? Because it's like they were born and then like handed a fucking meth pipe, you know, to go like do drugs. And it's like to be there with their life.

I always so curious is like, is it just some people, I'm assuming, are just quicker to understand and to learn that like movement of, okay, this is bad, but it can be better instead of like, okay, it's just going to get worse and worse and worse and then just allow it. Because there is that free, that sort of free will that we have, whether we're speaking about God or just in life, is like, that's the thing I think people get confused is we've been given that gift of choice and people don't, I don't know if they recognize. it because a lot of times something happened to them and they go this is my life now this is what it is. This is where I'm at. And then they just, they keep making choices to stay there instead of

go in a different direction. And they'll make an excuse why it's harder or it's difficult or whatever. And obviously everyone's circumstances so uniquely different. But at some point, it's like when when do people start to make the choice in the positive direction where they actually want to go instead of like, okay, I don't want to be here, but I'm staying here because I feel helpless. Yeah. So for you, I'm curious where in your life did you start like seeing the biggest change where you were like you went in this case I guess towards God in this conversation

what was happening prior to address what you just said I think that it's important to note that like the fight is not over until you're if you're still alive if you're still breathing you have a chance and all those people on the side of the road

you know what I mean going out of their minds they still have a chance because they're still alive I know a lot of people that have died, and then that's, you know, that's unfortunate because they didn't get that chance in this life, at least. You know what I'm saying? But if you're still breathing, there's a chance. And I've looked, and I've driven by those people and looked at them and thought, you know, when I was really bad on drugs, I've thought to myself, the only difference between me and this person is the circumstances we were born into. because I don't know what this person's circumstances were and if mine were different

I might be just like him yeah because my addiction is just as bad as his do you know what I'm saying? Yeah but to answer your question about you said how like how did I yeah for you personally I guess in this conversation like at what point in your life

did you feel to just kind of continue on the conversation about religion in a sense most drawn to God and what was happening prior to that like I'm assumed because I've had so many iterations of like man disbelief belief this belief like you know uncertainty like where was it the biggest change where you were like no this is yeah it was a year ago it was what happened prior I'll tell you also this is this how we do introductions right by the way Chad Hanks everybody by the way thanks for of me dude yeah of course i've been wanted to for a while yeah this is dope we've talked enough

you know we've talked about other stuff and it's good yeah thank you man um so like a year ago i was at like the word the darkest point of my life like i was at i was at one of the lowest i was probably the lowest point of my life like i said about just when you reach a point of like pain and suffering that it's just it's unbearable and what that looked like for me was having a fucking loaded gun in my head with my finger on the trigger like talking to myself like fucking do it you pussy just fucking do it because i didn't want to live anymore and i'm thinking to myself how the hell am i going to how how the hell am i just going to stay here when i just want to like it's it's right there it's right there you know what i'm saying

but i knew that i couldn't do it because i have a daughter and i'm not going to abandon my daughter but i thought to myself you know there's one other man in my daughter's life and that was my my baby mom's uncle my baby mom's uh brother my daughter's uncle got it and i would you i would like fall back on thinking like you know at least if i go like he's there you know what i'm saying what happened was shortly thereafter that night he passed away unexpectedly the same night not the same night but shortly thereafter oh shit like probably like the next couple like the same week wow he passed away god rest his soul you're like i can't do this now huh i'm not trying to laugh it because it's not funny but it's

it's kind of yeah I'd say God if anything that's what I was thinking I was like I was obviously he was a really great dude God rest of soul his name was Lawrence I had a great relationship with him

he was a really really great person just a kind soul you know and I was obviously really sad that he passed sad for my my baby mom's family and her and my daughter but I was really

selfishly sad that like my out was no longer on the table do you know what i mean yeah like now i didn't even have that option so of like so now i'm like how the fuck am i going to do this you know and then funeral we had the funeral and i'm like this is this is going to be so fucking gnarly to go to this funeral because no one even knows like the state that i'm in No one knows. And I'm like, this is going to be fucking gnarly. And I didn't want to go.

But I did, of course. And it was an open casket. And the whole, the church was filled with people. And I went up to the casket, man. It was in the front of the church where we walked in. And I went up by myself and I'm looking at him. And I had my moment with him. and I'm like, I talked to him like he was, like, alive.

I was like, yo, check this out, bro. I'm like, the way things are looking, like, I'm going to be the next one in the box. So if you can fucking hear me right now, I need some fucking help. Like, you're on the other side now? Like, do something, please. And then I went and sat back down. And then they had the whole service. at the end of the service

the pastor was like he did some shit that was like really like out of the ordinary you know like because usually they just talk about the person and you know but the pastor was like calling people out he was like it's time to pick a fucking side he didn't say fucking but you know

he's like it's time to pick a side are you on the side of Jesus are you on are you going to choose Christ or are you going to choose anything else time to pick a side He's like, you know what, matter of fact? How long ago was this?

A year ago. Okay. He was like, you know what? Matter of fact, if you feel like you're ready to pick a side right now, then stand up. And this is like, hello, like, embarrassing because I'm, like, not like a Jesus freak or a fucking Bible thumper. I never have been. I'm still not. You know what I'm saying?

I'm not the type of dude who's, like, fucking singing. Like, thank you. Like, that shit is, like, all really, like, cringe to me. but i just didn't even think about it i just stood up in front of this like this crowded as church it was like embarrassing but i just didn't care i just stood up and like everyone was like silent like damn you know and i was in the first row so like the whole church could see me i'm just like i was like this is this is this is it this is the sign you know what i just asked for so i stood up and the pastor like he was like repeat after me

me and I just repeated this prayer like just asking Christ to come into my life and I walked out of that church that day and everything just felt different and it's felt different ever since and I can the only way I can put it is just I experienced a a perfect peace ever since then that has been never ending it's been inconsistent. I used to be an emotional wreck. I used to be plagued by fucking anxiety and fear and just my life was just a, my internal world of my emotions was just a constant fucking roller coaster, you know, so unpredictable. One minute I could feel on top of the world, the next minute I feel like I want to fucking blow my brains out. Sometimes I'd be feeling really

good for like a couple weeks, a month. Next, I'm in a fucking terrible depression for a couple months sometimes i'm going up and down like multiple times a day and that was my that that's what it'd been like my entire fucking life it could just be said everything could be good i could just have one negative thought and it would send me to a downward spiral just like fucking terrified just just like plagued by fucking fear ever since then i haven't even had one negative even like split second of an emotion a negative emotion i haven't even had like a like a like a a fleeting moment of like if any of that i've just been at perfect peace man and i just know that that the only thing that that brought me that was jesus christ and that's what he that's why he was sent here

and that's when when he died and was resurrected that it was an energy transference his energy that he contained, that he was the embodiment of dispersed through the entire earth to become accessible to all people. And I fully understood that, you know, when people say, I'm saved, I always thought it meant like, I'm, like, saved, like, for the afterlife. Like, I'm going to be good for the afterlife. No. I was saved in this life.

Yeah. I mean... Because I wouldn't even be alive right now. he saved my life in this life you understand what i'm saying yeah you know what i find so interesting i i interviewed will smith and i asked him a question about all this wealth because he was in another podcast and a podcaster asked him was like hey you you you know google says you're worth this much money and it's like 350 million probably honestly more because google was always off and he didn't even address the money he he kind of went on to say and i asked him this um i asked him basically in relation

to like the money he had how does he actually find happiness because he's had it all and he went on to say how like he wishes everyone could have it all have all the money in the world and understand it like you could still be completely fucking miserable and not at all relating this to you personally but you know not sort of growing up the way you did because I don't know how you grew up but growing up in with a like a well-off family I mean Tom Hanks is probably one of the you know one of the fucking all-time greatest actors of all time which I have of a couple of the questions for you about that, but how did you get to a point in your life

where it was so bad when you had such a foot, what it would look like from the outside in, right? Such a foundation, because obviously I don't know. I don't know what your life looked like. That's why I want to talk to you about it, but having what most people would say, this would be an ideal life, then still ending up at that point

of like completely miserable, which like I said in the conversation, with Will Smith that was the same thing where he was like he has everything you could ever think you want could buy anything

you could ever fucking you could buy anything he could buy anything be anywhere own any house own any car own anything that like do anything

that people think they want to do with money you have money and still feel completely fucking miserable so to you like you

I'm just so curious like how did it how did you get to that point being from a place like that and like how does it you know yeah to put it simply myself

thinking that I'm the one in control of everything in my life therefore putting all the pressure on myself to control everything

and when things go astray blaming myself putting so much putting such a massive amount of pressure on myself was it was it because my entire life. Was it, is it, because I, pressure.

Yeah, because I've talked to, I, I, I don't, I don't know you well enough to know. I haven't had these actual conversations with you off camera, which we should do more. But I was talking to Josh about it because I was wondering, like, I couldn't imagine myself what I would think like, because my father took his life when I was very young. I never had like a figure that, oh, I can be like this person or act like, or exceed or succeed at this certain level. I've always curious, like, because we, you know, you hear about. Hollywood elites and then, you know, their kids and how their lives get all crazy.

And I'm like, there, there does have to be this sort of sense of your father and wanting to sort of either prove to him or like be great in a way that like, be honest. Like I don't even know if there's going to be actors that even reach that sort of level of success ever again. Like truthfully, like that level of success, I think is gone because that sort of Hollywood is also kind of fading and going away, which is a whole other conversation we could have. But, like, I've been trying to imagine, because how old are you? 33.

She's like my age and, like, growing up and being like, oh, that's my dad. What am I going to be known for or have or show for? I couldn't imagine that sort of. It sounds like, it's weird because, like, to most people, it's like, oh, that's a dream life. I get all these things or I could have, I potentially could have these things. Again, I don't know what's given to you, what's not given to you. But most people would be like, well, that should be so easy. it's interesting though how like

it that also adds this whole layer of like this crazy expectation especially as a man be probably different I don't know about like if it was a girl and for me it's so interesting because like I grew up without a father and I although challenging in its own way I had this sort of like open field of no sort of direction I had to figure it out of my own which was its own challenge but there was never like

there was no bar right you know it was just like good, hopefully you could figure it out because there was no like, yo, what should I do? It was a good idea. It was just kind of like, good luck. I just find it interesting how like you had such. And you did. Yeah, thank you.

Thank you. But to have such a bar. I'll give you your flowers, bro. I appreciate it. But to have such a bar and then go like, fuck, what am I? Like, who am I going to be? Because I remember when I was young thinking like my father took his life,

what's the point of life? Like, how am I going to end up? Am I going to end up like my dad? Like, no, okay, I want to live my life this way. I want to have something. I want to show. something i want to be something and like this is different your bar was like just insane is that part of the reason why the pressure was there definitely because i just felt completely unworthy of ever

beating that bar i felt completely unworthy to even you know exist really in that in that sphere because when you're in when you're born into that you kind of it's like the world kind of expects you to maneuver and navigate through that through that sphere but they also resent you because you're in that sphere without earning it yeah they expect you to meet those expectations but they also resent you because you didn't put any work in to be there and they have an idea that oh well your life must both be so fucking amazing but my life is shit so fuck you and your amazing life you just didn't have to work for it you know had you felt that a lot throughout your life yes and that all that negativity man that that people had towards me I internalized it because as a young kid I didn't

didn't know man i i didn't have anybody pull me aside and say hey man check this out these people are fucking jealous of you and they're threatened by you i didn't have anyone to say that man you know i'm saying so i just internalized it as they're probably right i'm worthless i don't deserve to be here I'm never going to fucking come close to meeting this bar. So I'm just, I internalized it by just feelings of just massive unworthiness. And then that also created a whole different monster because at a certain point I just kind of snapped.

You know, they say pressure makes diamonds. Yeah. Pressure also bust pipes. And I busted a lot of pipes in my brain. Do you know what I'm saying? before i came close to making the diamond your your dad never was like like how involved was he here's the thing man he's very he was involved and he was there for me yeah but the thing is is that he understands what it's like to be in his position he doesn't understand what it's like to be

in my position yeah not only that he's busy maintaining his position as he should absolutely as every man should yeah you know i'm saying so it's nothing against him of course you know what i'm saying And it's, it was a, my, uh, my, my, my perspective was entirely unique to me. And you couldn't expect anybody else to understand it because they're in their, they're in their position. Do you know what I'm saying? So like, it's nothing against anybody else. Yeah.

What was the child? What was your childhood like growing up like before you were, I guess, a young adult, like when you were a child? was it just like tough was it like it was great man my childhood was great yeah but but the whole i had a great i had an ideal childhood you know but the whole time throughout my childhood there was there was there were things bubbling up a lot of things bubbling up one of those things was as i got older you know noticing that well what i just mentioned the unworthiness and the resentment internalizing that another thing that was bubbling up was being coming as i got

older becoming aware that I was growing up in a bubble you know yeah and that not just a bubble of fame which is entirely its own bubble but a bubble of just privilege and wealth which you don't have to be famous to experience you know and being aware of this bubble right right, I was aware of the fact that me growing up in this bubble is that I'm not experiencing normal things that a normal kid would experience in the real world. And that became also a massive insecurity because as you, you know, as you get older and become a teenager, if you don't experience certain things, you become afraid of them. whereas other kids that are your normal age,

they've already experienced it so they know there's nothing to be afraid of. So as I got older at a certain point, I just decided I'm going to go way out of my way to experience the things that are outside of this bubble. And I broke out of the bubble. And that caused a lot of,

concern for my family and I got in a lot of trouble and there were consequences to all that that, you know, shaped me and were difficult to get through.

What were those things? Any examples? Well, the main one was just getting sent away to a and going through the troubled teen industry. You guys sent away, what is? 17 oh shit what does that what does that look like sent away like they're just like

yo pack up here's your shit go over there it looked like uh may 30th 2008 i was 17 years old was in my junior year of high school my last week of high school during my exams i was about to have summer then go into my senior year high school i'm all stoked yeah and i wake up in the morning and it's four o'clock in the morning and there's two huge fucking dudes sitting standing up the foot of my, standing up the foot of my bed, looking at me and they go, you're coming with us. Wait, wait, wait. I'm sorry I'm laughing at this, but I'm,

I don't mean it's not laughing. I'm just trying to understand. So, what, I don't, who, why were people there? They sent, they, like, brought people there for you? Yeah. Who? My parents. Yeah.

And it's nothing against that, man. Because. What were you doing that led to that? You were just, like, doing. Well, basically, I was just like, Once I started branching out and started to, like, want to, like I said, burst out of that bubble. It was so abrupt because I had been like a really good, like innocent kid my whole life. And then one day I just, you know, I just make that leap, make that step.

And it was like, what the fucker? Like, where has my child gone? But what did that step look like to them? What are you doing? Just like. I was just, I was trying to think when I was 70, I was doing dumb shit when I was 17, too, though. For sure. For sure.

It was, it was just regular teenage shit, man. Yeah. But, you know, smoking weed and getting drunk and doing stupid shit and fucking, you know, it was regular. But, but it was abrupt enough, it was such an abrupt change that it was concerning. Do you know what I'm saying? Because I really changed like that. As soon as I got a taste, I changed like that. Is it your, who's more concerned, your dad or your mom, curious?

My mom. Okay, that's fair. Yeah, you know, mom's always. Yeah. Your dad, I just imagine your dad. I don't know him at all. I've never spoken to him, but I just, he just, he just, that guy seems like he would just be chill.

He is chill. Yeah, okay. He is chill. I love my parents. I love my mom, you know what I mean? I love my dad, I love my mom so much. They're great parents, you know what I'm saying? This is all just like water under the bridge,

and I don't blame them for for sending me to this shit because they were misled as well and they were manipulated by these industries and by these these programs that are just now starting to like be exposed and come to light 20 years later you know yeah almost 20 years later so it's it's it's to like they take you somewhere and then what like a is like a military thing you you they take you uh to these programs called wilderness programs um out in like the middle of the most like desolate like parts of america mine was in utah oh shit southern utah it's like so remote dude like you know when you're flying into la and you look out the window and you're like god damn there's a lot of fucking empty space

ton you know what i think there like it's right there like in the middle of it you know what i mean like you they take you they took me i tried to run by the way i tried to escape that didn't go well um at four in the morning no i tried to run once you were there yeah once i was there i didn't try to run from those big ass fools because i know they were they were like they meant business you know but when they handed me off to the people that ran the program who looked like some hippie-ass motherfuckers i was like oh i'm definitely running from these fools but there was nowhere to run and uh there was a police station right on the corner. So right as I'm sprinting for my life

by the police station, whoo, who, a fucking squad car pulls up and they were like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. And they grabbed me and shit, but I just collapsed on the ground because I was fucking, I was like full on sprinting for like a mile. Like, have you ever like ran for your life? Like literally ran for your life when I was a kid.

Yeah. Like ran for your life and your freedom. Like, for like a couple, like for like 10 seconds, if you can just run and then hide and okay, boom, boom, they go by, okay, I'm cool. then it's like easy but if there's nowhere to run and you have to sprint like for like a full mile like dude i ran from a dog it is i thought i was gonna die like because i couldn't breathe like i was like just because i was so gas like you don't just smoked you know so i like collapsed on the

ground and then a couple like you know however long later they caught up with me and they're like all huffing and puffing and like you're pretty fast you know and they fucking put me in the zip tie and then I just was like okay I give up you know so they processed me gave me all my gear like you know it's fucking full body search squat and cough get you all your gear like you're in an orange like fucking like you're in like an orange jumpsuit pretty much and then they blindfolded me put me in the back of a truck in the cab with two staff on each side of me like this and they drove me like two to three hours like into the middle of nowhere to a different spot to just the middle of the desert like what the fuck to the middle of the

desert and then you're just sitting in the back of the trunk like going over these bumpy roads like you just for like hours you know and then they get out and they're like okay take your blindfold off and they're like okay you're about to like join the group or whatever don't talk to anybody if you try talking to anybody they're not going to talk to you anyway they just so they lead you in there and there's a bunch of other kids there and there's a couple staff there and the kids are all fucking filthy and like they look like bums like covered in dirt you're like oh my God

then they sit you by a tree and they're like okay just sit here and don't talk to anybody and they sit you there for you're sitting there for like five six days all day all night just sitting there in silence what's the purpose what's the fucking point of that because you have to earn your privilege

to join the group you have to earn the privilege to be able to talk to the other people that is that I wonder if that actually helped anyone. I'm actually genuinely curious. Did that help you? It helped me, but not in the way that it was intended to, not in the way that they thought it was supposed to or like the way that they sold it, like the way they sold it to your parents. Like, this is going to help your kid. It didn't help me in that way. It helped me in a completely

way that was entirely my own because that was through that experience is how I like came to know God came to know that God is real when you were young you know that experience because before that I was like an atheist like an agnostic or I didn't have any knowledge or understanding of God I thought maybe maybe there is no God you know but that experience uh that changed that that that's when I came to know the the reality of God's existence and then what got you away from it because obviously now more recently it this last year you figure you kind of came closer again but what got you away from it when you were 17 or around that age. I never got away from it.

I just, I acknowledged I had a relationship with God, but I didn't have a relationship with Christ. Okay. I never got away from it. I mean, it might look like I got away from it, but even in like my darkest moments and even like in like the depths of my addiction, like I always had a relationship with God. That was kind of my flaw because I like used drugs.

Like even by using drugs, I use drugs to feel more close to God. But really, you're not getting closer to God. You might feel spiritual, but that's not the, but God isn't the one you're getting close to. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. So what kind of drugs?

Like marijuana and shit? Nothing crazy. Before I got sent away? Yeah. Yeah, it was just like drinking, just getting really like a hammered, like blackout drunk. What after? You did more, you did different drugs after?

Yeah, bro. When I got out of that shit, I fucking, I was making up for lost time, you know, because I was away for like over a year, over a year and a half. I never went back to my high school, never saw my friends again. They all graduated without me. I went through that shit. And I was, the first part is the wilderness program.

Then when you're there at about a month in, you get a letter and they're like, you're not coming home after this. You're going to another place after this. And you're like, fuck. you know what i mean like my life is over pretty much like i'm stuck here you know and then so then after that i went to like a another the secondary program which was like a school it was like a boarding school but you can't leave you can't do you you you understand you're under supervision the whole time you have no freedom you know what i'm saying yeah and you just go to school and then

like go to your dorm you know what i'm saying and uh i was there so so all and all i was gone for like over a year and um when i got out of that shit i was like man i'm a fucking hit the ground running you know yeah it's like it didn't make me want to be a good boy it made me want it to fucking you know like get my lick back you know what other drugs did you do my worst drug the drug i had the most problem with was just fucking coke dude yeah i'm a fucking coke head straight up straight up not now not anymore yeah but that's my drug of choice fuck cocaine bro like like fucking tony montana dude i fucking like i don't like i'm the type of dude right

like you know like you go out to the clubs and there's like people you know that like aren't like known coke heads they're like big coke heads and you might like you might like do a bump with them in the bathroom one time and you're like i know this dude's the fucking coke kid but like i want a little bum like okay fine you know i know i've only done coke once i i would go do like coke with the coke heads and they would and they would be telling me like yo chill bro like we just fucking like just wait a second

you know what I mean like just like give it like 15 minutes like you know what I'm saying they're like it was just yeah man I couldn't get enough of that shit I'm glad you stopped that's like the worst it's so bad so it's so bad it's really hard in your body

and your heart and everything man your soul bro it's terrible it eats away it's just like you're like you just wither away because you can't eat you can't sleep yeah so when what this is a little bit of a joke here but when when were the illuminati meetings dude why is that such a thing why is it such a perception of hollywood well there's a lot of sick shit going on in hollywood yeah and that's like in like

a common knowledge now here's the thing right is that if anybody if any of these fucking people like actually met my family yeah and and can see who they are and feel their goodness then they wouldn't they wouldn't continue to indulge themselves indulge themselves in these fucking theories and all this shit these rabbit holes that they get in on the internet now don't get me wrong there's some sick shit going on in hollywood yeah but see if they knew my parents they would know that like my parents like have avoided like and Anything that's like Hollywood, like for like their entire, like career and my entire life. Like they have purposely raised me to be like as normal as fucking possible.

And they don't even like doing that. They don't, they don't like like just like even like going to like, I'm not talking about like any fucking wild parties. Because my parents wouldn't even know about any of those. Yeah. But like it's just like going to like red carpet events or like whatever. They don't like doing that shit. Yeah. They're like, I got to fucking do this because it's work.

you know what I'm saying I have to do it but apart from that they'd like to just fucking their family people do they like to chill at home and go to and be with their family and travel and that's it I was raised like they're the most normal

fucking people in Hollywood but here's the thing is that what people don't understand is that if you're like an extremely famous like celebrity it's normal for those people to like meet the president yeah the fucking the the team that wins the

super bowl goes and meets the president do you know what I'm saying yeah that that's a normal fucking thing but in this today's day and age with just so much corruption being exposed in politics and entertainment and everything people look at people on the highest levels the people that are fucking standing next to a president in the picture, and they think it's all this big fucking, like, sick cabal. Do you know what I'm saying?

Yeah, of course. And I don't know whether there is or isn't like a fucking for me personally, I think that corporations run the world and there's something called the military industrial complex, which is a real thing, right? But it's like not

not everybody involved in entertainment and not everybody involved in any field politics big business is is like some sick evil fuck do you know what I'm saying? There are sick evil fucks in all fucking high echelons of anything and there's sick evil fucks in all echelons of anything yeah exactly yeah in the regular echelons too

but it's it's it's it's like the people will I think oftentimes like the truth is kind of boring and it's more interesting for people to go down these wild rabbit holes and these wild theories because it's more interesting to think about than just like day to day life yeah like just a normal dude who just happened to, you know, do what it took to be like whatever ex crazy celebrity. Right. Yeah. I mean, I get it.

Obviously, I know that there's no, it's kind of, it would be insane to think that every single person at that level is just like involved in some fucking crazy shit. It's, it's a, it's just a weird time. It's a very weird time. The internet has really, it's a very weird time. It's a very weird time. Change shit. Yeah.

I wonder if like. i don't know do you think you think it's going to get worse or better i don't know and it doesn't fucking matter because the kingdom is not of this world yeah this world is not supposed to be the fucking answer it never was because you're not going to find the answer in this world you're not going to find the answer for what you're seeking into what you can see with your own eyes you're going to find it

in what you can't fucking see yeah so whichever way this world goes and it looks like it's going really shitty yeah you know what I'm saying so shit bro

but it doesn't fucking matter because I mean that's not I don't mean to say that as in like a cop out as in like people shouldn't like like fight the good fight because I think we should yeah do you know what I'm saying yeah otherwise it's a nihistic and it's like

exactly I don't mean it like that yeah I just mean like look within yourself and look well you know what I'm saying well yes well that is the greatest problem that we have is that I think because of the internet and like the fast pacedness of social media and like everyone else's life for what everyone else has or the Twitter fucking warlords of who's right and who's wrong. Like we've lost that actual, obviously to some degree what other people are doing. There is like this existential fuck up that is affecting everyone. But like individually, we are the only people that can like, quote unquote, change the world. Like, but we have to start right here within ourselves.

No one seems to want to do that. And it's always that guy believes this, I believe this, that guy's wrong, he's an enemy. Let's have a problem. And it's like whether or not you believe something completely different to me or not, there's still conversation and discourse that can happen to like understand each other. And that's what seems to be completely out the fucking window. And it's just like that person has this. I should have that.

Why does he have that? Why don't I have that? I'm younger. He has more than me. He's younger than me or whatever it is. I'm older, I should have more, that person. It's just the weirdest time where it's like, it, and I don't know, people just got so far away from like, okay, what am I doing?

Because like at the end of the day, when it's all said and done, the person who wants more out of their life for whatever, they have, it starts here being like, okay, what can I do to get more? Like, what can I do to have more success or to have more love? It's like, okay, I got to, I got to believe it here. I got to have more love here. I got to start here so I could start going towards whatever it is out externally that I want. And that is just, I don't know if it's by design or like it's encouraged, but this like warfare of humans against other humans based on like religion, political, like socioeconomics shit. It's just like it seems like we're being pushed further and further and further just to fucking hate each other and to be at war and to be like they're wrong. I'm right.

he's right she's wrong whatever it is and it's just crazy no one like we're losing the art of like okay where am i at what am i doing that's adding to this and then you got people on the internet who like virtue signal other people when like about what they're doing or what they should be doing when they're over here there's some sort of monetization behind it and then it's like i'll say whatever i can to get attention and like talk shit about this person or say this crazy fucking i don't know racist word or whatever the fuck and just get attention that other people would be like, oh, it's okay to do that, so I'm going to do that. And it's just like, this cycle of like,

is this all just for some self-enrichment? And people lost the actual thing that really matters. And again, when I talked, you know, I had that conversation with Will and, you know, hearing what someone like that, who has everything says is like, what does it all mean? Yeah.

Like, are we all fighting just for more money or for more status or for more fame? And it's like, at the end of the day, like, you die and it's all gone. And what even is more? Exactly. Because you could be fighting. for more money and more success and then find that and then get it and find that you still want to

blow your fucking brains out do you know what i'm saying so what is success and but but i think like picking up on what you're saying i think like the absolute worst thing about today's society that's holding us back the most and causing all these things that you're talking about is the inability to to freely express an opinion the inability for people to with the inability to freely express an opinion without being vilified in an opinion that goes against the opinion that is being pushed and the the the institutional and bureaucratic assistance and the machine that is created now that is so powerful in our lives

from the internet and social media and big tech companies that like it's cleared and the media where it's like it's so obvious now it's so fucking obvious that it's like this is like a part of the institution that is it's it's a machine that is vilifying

anybody just for stating an opinion that doesn't go along with an agenda the agenda or the side of the agenda that is being pushed because

if you can't have free speech which is what this country is based off on it doesn't exist anymore free speech doesn't exist anymore it's crazy And what are the, dude, because, because here's the thing, our generation, it's like it used to be, we all know, it used to be like, go get a job, go get a degree, work a nine to five.

This generation is like, why would I do that when I can fucking make money from the internet and build a business? Yeah. Duh. Why the fuck would you want to go do that? Not knocking it, but I'm saying there's so much, if that's what you do, that's what you do, respect. You know what I'm saying? Respect. Because that's not, because that's not everybody's bag. And I respect that. I respect people that work hard and take care of their fucking business and take care of their shit. But for most people in this generation, I think they would rather, you know, you utilize the internet to be able to make a living. And nowadays, every single person who's utilizing the internet to make a living has to take account of, has to self-censor so many, so many opinions to even, not even to say something like crazy or like but say something that that's even like just slightly like breaching the the boundary of like oh this go this is going against the this is going against the opinion that one of the craziest because it affects them because it affects

their ability to to eat and make money and provide for themselves so everybody is succumbing to, you know, not really speak freely. Yeah. So they can continue to make a fucking living. And I think that is fucking the worst thing about what's going on today. Yeah.

Well, dude, it's, I even think of that example, this whole like Fauci and the fucking mass thing and the six feet thing. I was reading earlier, it was like, the dude just made the shit up. And at one point, you couldn't say anything against that on the internet. Because I was a content creator

throughout the whole entire period dealt with the whole like i've talked about this for it but him closing the gym down and going to court like nine times for it and every time i would show up and be like i'm not shutting my gym down like what do you guys want for me oh you're supposed to i'm like why i'm not going to do it show me why i need to do show me science show me anything based in like actual data why my gym being shut makes sense and is going to say people versus all these other companies that you have open wide open no matter what because they're big corporations like Costco and shit down the street and it's like to hear all that and then to see years later they're like oh yeah actually this stuff was kind of bullshit and now there's actually problems related to

this stuff and now now you can kind of talk about it now we're not going to censor you as much it's like but wait when it one when it was at its peak I was like if I said anything even the word the the COVID word shadow man gone yeah demonetized like next video getting way less views next video getting way less views and it was like I live through that actually making content through that being like this is fucking insane if I'm not now on the flip side also if I said because I would notice other content creators that would say the sort of narrative views engagement is like they're almost let's make this oh we should this should get we should algorithm like it's like what the fuck and it's just like because at the time I just didn't believe I wasn't like you I'm so

sold on this because it all didn't make sense in which they were like implicating these sort of the lockdown here versus it's okay there and it's it's okay if it's this and it's none of it made sense and then the rules that it makes sense the arbitrary and then then years later it's like zero accountability yeah and then years later it's like yeah we're all kind of wrong about that uh but that's what we knew then it's like no but the p because i even interviewed don't lemon and he said that in the podcast when i did on full send he was like i was like you got on the tv and was saying how like you should be villainized and you should be ashamed of yourself if you don't have the vaccine and you're hurting other americans and and and

now it's getting out where it's like that wasn't exactly the case and his answer's response to what i was saying was like well that that is what we knew at the time and i was like that's not true other people just weren't able to say what they also knew there was also dated information proving the opposite in relationship to the whole thing and it's just like you just weren't looking at it and weren't allowed to talk about it and weren't allowed to say it on whether it's on that news station or that new station or fucking youtube or wherever else it was being fucking censored and it's just like that can't be your excuse it's because it's it's slippery because I even said it way back then I was like imagine the shoes now on the other foot

and the same thing's happening in the other direction with something that you believe strongly in or you feel strongly and you're on that other side of like the censorship where you're like wait what I'm saying is not illogical it's not irrational it's not wrong it's not based in science but I just can't fucking say it but I believe it I know this is true and like it's proven but no no no it's wrong though and if you say it you'll be penalized for it punish 100% everything that I just said is a fucking fact and it's just like what like how can how can someone not see the problem in that just because at the time whoever side it was on and leaning towards it's like oh it's yeah of course this is what we're doing it's like well what about when it all flips what about when it's something else that like it's flipped on you now the the problem itself is in that the fact that we can't have discourse and say whatever platform I don't give a fuck what it's on they should you should be able to say hey this is how I feel and this is what I believe in these is the data that I'm know what's going on here not just because we don't want that to be out because i got to make a ton of money from fucking these Pfizer whatever the fuck it is it's like that is the problem and that's

just like now translated into like a bunch more new shit whether it's this war or that war this thing it's like we're all just arguing and it's like no but as long as it makes sense for like where all the money's made then we'll just keep saying it's okay there it's like dude that's that's scary that's a very scary thing because what you're saying comes to true where it's like, what about the free speech and the communication of it all? And then it's like, now you're just halting like the growth of humans because it's all about money. And it's like at the end of the day, dude, like love is the only thing that matters.

Like being able to have that with people and share that with people in those moments that you could have with people that like you have love with or love for and you want to share and grow and have moments together. Like even the people at the highest, highest, highest level have everything in the world say the same thing. It's like, that's all that matters truly. so it's like how much is enough and like when will people just get to a point where it's like

yeah like make money and get business and sell shit and have a good time but like how are we getting to the point where it's like no it needs to be this way because I need it all. It's like dude what the fuck is happening? I don't understand it either do I and it's fucking un-American

it is to say to create a society where you have to live in fear of sharing your opinion out of worrying about being punished bro it's the opposite of what America was built on where you cannot make a living

it's like good luck with your good luck making your living now because you stepped out of bounds by stating a fucking opinion that's not offensive that's not hurtful yeah that's not American well like I said it's that's literally it's opposite of what America was built exactly it's it's a disgrace yeah it's a fucking disgrace so it's like man what the fuck like what do people do if you're watching this and it's like how do you how do you move forward in your opinion i think obviously it's just like you have to go okay where am i at what am i doing what am i willing to like put my neck out for and like it's still fine and create

circumstances in which you can be happy and share love and with people in your life and like that's kind of all we can focus on because it's like can't Can we change the sort of story or narrative? I guess if we all did that, then yes. You know, but so many people, I think it's easier for people to just go, well, this is what everyone else is doing. Because I remember that time, too, so specifically, I was like, people even without conviction in it were just like, well, this is what I'm supposed to do.

Exactly. So I'm just going to do it. Well, this is what I'm supposed to think. Exactly. So I'm not even going to ask myself, what do I really think about this? Exactly. I'm just going to just buy into whatever they're telling you. me to think and that's the worst part because i say that the first thing the first thing you have to do

is self-reflect because there's so many people out there that don't even take this step to ask themselves what do i actually think because the the the the things that are being fucking like funneled and pushed and trying to shape what you think is so strong the pressure it's so strong we're getting it from all fucking sides of of things and fucking greater greater fucking organizations

or entities of fucking business or whatever technology that are greater than just a

fucking individual person like intentionally shaping what it is you think and it's so powerful and so subtle that a lot of people

don't even realize what's happening but you know what it's actually not that subtle because I think think it's also blaringly fucking obvious now yeah to a lot of people it's gotten that point yeah you know it's like it's pretty undeniable you know so i i honestly i just have faith dude that like the people are going to like people and people being able to have love for each other is is going to

allow things to work itself out because i think like on a human basis like people are much like on a human to human basis you're just fucking walking down the street and you see someone and that person could have like completely different views from you but if you're just it's just two ships passing in the night like I think people are more inclined to treat each other with respect and not get carried away and all this fucking divisive bullshit yeah but then people get on the internet and they always way different it's it's it's real life versus the internet yeah I mean, that pretty much sums everything up that we're talking about. Like, real life versus the internet.

Can you separate real life from the internet? Or can you not? There's a lot of people that aren't, that aren't separating real life from the internet. But the internet is not fucking real life. And it never will be. You know what I'm saying? And real life trumps the internet every fucking time. Yeah.

What is that? The internet's not fucking real. Real life. Walking outside, having the sun shine on your face a little bit, feeling the breeze. that's real life and that's better than the internet every fucking time. I choose that every time.

Yeah. I wonder if the internet will ever adopt more of real, or if it just can't just because of the way that the sort of algorithms and companies that are invested in it are just never going to allow

or if they see that they've gotten to, I wonder if they get to a point where they're so like, do they ever get to the point where they're like, this is, we've taken this kind of fucking far. I think it's getting to the point

where they're not being able to profit it as much because people could because people are letting like it be known that they're taking it too far yeah so once they start to lose money you know what i mean it's like oh like all these fucking like if all these things just that that we put out like just failed miserably and didn't like the movies and didn't make us any money you know i mean because people are sick of the shit like maybe that can change it because i mean i think ultimately like It's all about money. Yeah, in those situations,

because it's all about the shareholders and how much profit they have or the ownership and the money in, money out type shit. But I think, dude, it's kind of crazy. Like,

haven't you noticed, like, it's kind of crazy, right? Because of what I've been noticing, and you'd tell me if you agree, but it's almost like, society has gotten,

like, so, like, obscene that it's almost like creating a revival of, like, people becoming more, like moral or like valuing things like the simple things more

in relationship to like in relationship to like god and jesus or just like kind of like people are starting to like yeah i mean like with god and religion but but like just kind of like rejecting all that you know it's kind of like it's it's like a naturally kind of just like a natural like checks and balances system you know it's like things go go so extreme one way and then it kind of creates things to mellow out and you know what I mean it's like yeah yeah yeah I mean I get a lot of that I'll read like Twitter comments whether it's on like a super right page or a super left it's like everyone all together like if I if I would like put all all the comments together and like read them all right now everyone's just like kind of fucking

tired of everything yeah like whether it's believing this or believing everyone's like dude this is everyone is kind of like collectively collectively feeling like what the fuck is going on yeah and and like i don't think that will sustain i think something will kind of give and i think i do believe like you said already i think things are already kind of giving in certain directions that they need to yeah so there is good in it and i and also like I want to say like fucking like I myself have like enjoyed like the obscene like you know what I'm saying yeah and like so I'm not trying to put myself on like a high horse you know what I'm saying and I'm not like some fucking I'm not like a fucking I'm not on any I'm not on any sort of high horse

but even with myself like at this time of my life like because you know I I fucking enjoy all I enjoy being ignorant too you know what I'm saying and I have enjoyed I've had a lot of fun being ignorant as fuck yeah you know I'm saying and I've embraced it and I've fucking you know I've you know like thrived in that you know what I'm saying yeah but even so I'm not like putting myself out there as like I'm like like that like I'm like on any sort of high horse or like if you're if you indulge in that like you're like inferior I'm just saying that even with me at this self in my life And maybe it's just me getting older. But, like, I got to the point where, and I think I'm just kind of getting there now,

of it's like, okay, well, like, what else is there? And is this really, like, the mark I want to leave on the world? And is this really, like, who I want to be? So, and I, yeah. Based on what you're saying is this is like the whole, in relationship to the whole human experience. Yeah. But none of this at all, everything that we just spoke about, is surprising at all to me

because everyone's timeline is so uniquely different. Yeah. Everyone experiences things at a different rate. They come to realizations at things at a different rate. Their willingness to learn is a different rate. That's why we're here, truthfully. And it's not like, I talk about all this in a way where it's like, man, it's fucked up. But truthfully, it's like it is also just human.

Yeah. Because the guy who is in control of the company with all the money, like I also, there's parts of me that goes, I also don't blame that guy for wanting to protect or control or to continue what he has. Because I could understand how that feels as well on a different scale for myself.

So I at all, I don't like go, you're a villain, you're a bad person. I think there's certain things that's like, yo, there should be some more give. There should be a little bit more healthy discourse for a lot of things.

But in relationship to humans, it's like that's like it'd be like telling like a 15 year old kid like all these things and like you tell him all this stuff and he's going to be like yeah i just want to go ride my bike like i don't what the fuck you're talking about but like this is what i know yeah or a 20 year old who who maybe they're in the same sort of mindset because of their their circumstances their their conditions like who they are what how they're raised and they just don't know any differently so it's like we're all at a different pace of learning and understanding and that's also why we're here so it's like good and bad at the same time, which is just life, the whole Yin and Yang idea. And it's like,

this is what it is. So I don't talk about this to say like, man, the world's so fucking terrible. But it, it's just important to talk so that people can kind of like maybe see something from a different perspective. Whether or not they want to like go and look at it or try to understand it better, it's completely on their own timeline. And whenever they say is, or they feel or they're really able to actually understand is on them. So that's why all this, you know, we can talk for days about it but it's like I can't tell the 22 year old look this is so important this is the most important thing when I was 22 if I knew this my life but it's still his choice to fuck up a ton of times before he goes okay what that guy said was actually right yeah now I'm now I understand

yeah because I was the same human like you said like yeah I've indulged in the bullshit like I've been a part of the bullshit like I can never remove myself from like I'm not some fucking I'm not Jesus. You know what I'm saying? Like when we go wrap it all up, like I'm not. Yeah. I'm trying my best to sort of like, I guess in these situations and conversations is to open up whoever's listening to think like a little bit more than just like what I know and what I'm told and what I know at this moment and like look left and look right and try to understand this could make some sense. That could make some sense. You know, how can we make this the best thing possible? Right. And that's, you just hit it. But but then we go back to the conversation about

censoring and like freedom of speech like we need that to be able to do that exactly and so it's like that there is a problem an overlying problem there which is like we got to kind of get we need to get rid of that otherwise like you're just creating people to just be robots in one direction it's like what you just said it's like to be able to look left look right okay this makes sense that makes sense but to me it feels like it's like no you're not now you're you can only you're only allowed to look one way yeah that's it that is a problem and that's it that's it that's the problem yeah that's the problem so how do we fix it i don't fucking know yeah i mean either i don't know yet i think just talking about it just talking about it i think it's all we can do yeah

yeah that's all we can do man so what about you in your life what what are you super passionate about now and like have you ever had you ever thought about being like a fucking actor like because obviously your dad you know i always i always curious because like clearly you got to fucking in it He needed it. This cracks me up. Because obviously he could probably talk to some people, you know? It's so funny, dude. It's Forrest Gump, dude.

It's like, people are like, are you like, why don't you be an actor? It's like, I am. I mean, like, I just filmed like a show for Netflix and it's coming out. That's sick. It'll come out like probably in like January. You know what I'm saying? But the thing about being an actor is like, you have to wait to get a role. Like, you know what I mean?

You have to go. You have to audition. you have to fucking maybe you you know what you would have crushed it in sons of anarchy i wish i was in bro now what a bet the dope is i wish it i was that was like one of the best tv series oh so i really fucking ride like yeah yeah yeah like if i can be doing wheelies and shit like they wouldn't have to use a stunt double you know it would have been so saying no i know i know ridden that's why i'm like damn like fucking i i love that show but um it's like yeah every role I've ever got like I auditioned like just like anybody else like going like

with like fucking hundreds of other people like my dad can't just call someone up and say put my son in this movie like it doesn't work like that he can't do that he could maybe but like it would be like it'd be you know what I've related to it's probably like a it's probably like a bodybuilding show where like you could win a show but you have to be good enough to win the show like yeah because I've been invited to like things where like the guy's like you're going to win the show and I was like okay it's corny that you're telling me that and I showed up and I won the show but I was in shape yeah it wasn't like I showed but I was fat and I won the show yeah like you have to be able to actually do it otherwise you're going to be like yeah it's not

going to work for us regardless exactly yeah it's like if I if I it's like if you've been working out for like a couple of years and like you look pretty good like you can't just have like your dad calling me hey like put my son in like the top lineup for mr olympia you know what i'm saying yeah like you can fucking but but if you fucking continue and you actually fucking well i want to do this i want to win mr olympia and you get to the point where you're fucking big enough to be on that stage then you can do it do you know what i'm saying yeah so like everything i've ever had acting wise i i earned on my own and and um like the the biggest just finished doing it well What is it? What's the name of it? Can you say any of that stuff?

It's called Running Point. Running Point. Yeah. Are there any other big actors in it? Yeah. Kate Hudson. She's... Fuck. She's the lead, and I have a big role in it. That's dope, man. So, yeah. The acting thing has always been going.

What kind of role is it? It's a comedy. You're in a comedy? Yeah. Oh, shit. Yeah. It's funny. It's pretty off brand from this podcast. Yeah, fuck it. But yeah, it's looking, believe it or not, it's actually pretty,

I'm actually pretty fucking funny. It's funny because it's like, yeah, not at all what we talked about, no jokes. Yeah. Real life shit. Jesus. That's cool. That's cool. That's dope, man.

I've always lived in like, man, I would love to do stuff like that, but I just don't even have put the time or effort energy to it at all. I think I can play some body, you know, some bodyguard roles. Oh, you got your own thing going, my boy. Yeah, yeah. You're running a fucking empire over here. saw it. Yeah. A little different.

What you're gonna go do like waiting around on a set fucking six of the morning like I think you're good, bro. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Are you working on anything else besides that? I just finished that.

So, um, no, I was filming that for the past like three months. What about music shit? I know you've done some music stuff in the past. Yeah, I'm getting ready to drop some music. What kind?

I'm going to drop some music. It's going to be surprising. Surprising. Surprising. Left field? i don't think people are going to see it coming interesting it's going to be very different from any music that i've put out before okay different genres yeah oh shit that's cool i just want to save the surprise yeah that's fine that's fine yeah but uh that's right around the corner

yeah yeah anything else you work on uh like career wise yeah just like hobbies and stuff career wise um no acting in music is is pretty much it for me yeah acting in music i mean it takes it takes long enough to get good at one thing you know i mean there's other things i have ideas i could do um and maybe i will but right now um the acting and the music is uh is what i'm focused on what about hobbies hobbies i mean i love riding bikes yeah fuck yeah um I collect stamps. We gotta ride again. I make little models of fucking ships

and like the glass bottles. Wait, wait. I'm just kidding. Oh, no, no, you're fucking with me. I'm just, I'm fucking with you. Yeah, I'm fucking with you. Yeah, I don't really have any hobbies. Or maybe I just don't have any healthy hobbies.

Yeah. They're in the gym. Yeah. Is that a hobby? Yeah, I mean, for some people, it's a complete lifestyle. But I'd say for most people, it's probably like a hobby. Yeah. I think it's a lifestyle.

Yeah. I think it's a lifestyle. Has it, has a gym taught you anything that you think super valuable? Yeah. I mean, it's like,

because like, like, I've been like, I started lifting, like, I started like going to the gym and I was like, you know,

like 16 or some shit. Yeah. But like I, I never like, I never really like, knew what the fuck I was doing because like you really like going to the gym

doesn't matter like if you don't like know like your diet yeah like if you don't know like what you need to be eating like to compliment your workouts the workouts aren't really doing anything you know what I'm saying? Yeah unless like you were just trying to just get strong

yeah you know obviously in that point though too you have to be eating enough yeah eating enough and eating enough protein and stuff you know but like so I like I would like go to the gym like sometimes like I'd like go to like get motivated for like a little while and then fall off for a long time but then eventually I just got to the point where it's like no matter what's going on like I'm going to like be in the gym like five days a week like no matter what and if I can't be in a gym like I'm just going to bust out like another like workout like no matter how I'm feeling you know I mean like no matter if I want to or not like I'm just going to do it you know you have to you know that's So I guess that's something, you know what I mean? Like, I don't know what even to call that, like, discipline or whatever, but maybe.

I mean, but it's like, you can also, like, be fucking ripped and, like, have a, and, like, have the discipline to, like, have, like, a fucking, like, a fucking, like, great physique and, like, have no discipline in, like, every other aspect of your life. Yeah. You know what I'm saying?

So, like, yeah, like the singular focus of just that. Yeah. I, I, I, my life was a lot like that for a long time. Really? Yeah, where it was only mattered, like, yeah, I was making content, but, like, that was, always secondary. It was always like, and it's still in my life, the gym is still number one where it's like I have to complete that every day. And it's, it's kind of faltered. I would say like it's

changed a little bit, not falter, but it's changed a little bit as I've gotten older and more busy. But like it's always the sort of center focal point of my day now. But I remember from me like 22 to like 28, it was like nothing else mattered, including like relationships and everything that I was dealing with then. It was like it was here and it was. cool and like I you know I've been in love but it's like it was like I would pass up anything else for that and it affected a lot of my relationships and interpersonal relationships too because it was so so focused on just one thing that like these whole other like buckets of uh things in my life was just like yeah fuck that this is the only thing that matters and it it's aided me a lot but

it's also hurt me a lot because as I got older like I told you about the timeline thing and understanding I had to learn things that I could have spent I could have spent some time in my earlier 20s kind of learning better and I kind of had to learn them a little bit later yeah so but that's just my time you know my timeline it was just had to be that way yeah um but I definitely think that like life is much better like when you're swole yeah no bro I I I have to believe that I mean it's true it's true yeah like because if like even if everything sucks you're like at least I'm still like pretty swole yeah and that does give you a like a leg up on a lot of shit you

does you know why you know why because it's like you can like everything can be shit and you can have like zero opportunities happening in your life but if like you're swole when that opportunity pops up like you're gonna like be able to like rise like seize it do you know what I'm saying

do you think it's a mentality it's to get swole it's no it's because yes yes 100% and because it's like when you walk in the room when there's an opportunity in a room and you walk in the room

you can have you can have you could be broke and have nothing going on but if you're fucking swole but if you're fucking swole like you're bringing something into that room bro I can't tell you how many situations I've been in where before I had anything no one knew who the fuck I was

I'd walk in somewhere and people like I remember when I first started getting in like the scene of before social media for me social media is like everything but I kind of started like creeping into the scene of like Hollywood musicians like as I was a trainer and I was like now in these like sort of like settings where like these people are around parties every single time someone would be like yo how much you bet like someone that I probably want to talk to would be like interested in talking to me just because they're like why do you look like that yeah and that could be a dude who is like a

powerful ass motherfucker who's rich as fuck who has like way more than you could ever dream of but you but but he looks up to you because you don't have that because he looks so you that's power bro because i'm saying it's opportunities and it's relationships so you just like because it's crazy you know what i'm saying because it's like that gives you the power to be able to be more so the master of your own fate to be able to like nurture your relationship and and move forward and progress because somebody could be a fucking billionaire and have everything you want but you just being swole that guy's like wants to be your friend like yeah oh what's i got a lot of fucking like you man like let's go get let's what's

you got going on let's go talk about it you know what I'm saying like I want to do business with you man you know what I'm saying meanwhile you're just the fucking broke swole dude fucking that was me dude but it's like you have something you got something going on because whatever wherever you go there you are you know what i'm saying wherever you go there we are in whichever room you walk into you're the room damn dude being swole is a cheat code it is a cheat code everyone should try to get a little bit jack yeah yeah yeah for real you know and it's not like i don't buy into the whole shit if like if you're not swore you're a piece of shit and you're a pussy like i don't buy into

that man no i'm saying yeah yeah not but it's just like if people actually like like worked built themselves up a little bit like they would see that shit kind of goes on a whole lot easier for you yeah because it's it's i mean in the in the world it's a very very small of people who are like where you notice you go oh that guy fucking clearly that guy he does some shit that i don't necessarily do probably yeah and it's not any standard it's not like oh you got a fucking not not everybody is going to be fucking bradley martin 260 just like fucking stacked you know what i'm saying yeah but it's like everybody can be like better than where they're what they are sure you know what i'm saying so it's not about reaching any fucking

standard or like you gotta look like this fucking person it's just like put the working on yourself lift some fucking heavy shit like eat the right meals treat your body right drop the fucking drop all the fucking drugs and the bullshit it's like see try that out and then see how your life goes before you try to fucking come up with some fucking shortcut you know what I'm saying yeah that's fucking some fucking scheme you know I mean to try to get ahead can you try can you start with the simple shit yeah you know people are afraid of all that though people it's the hard What do you think they're afraid of? Hard work.

Failure. I think most people are afraid of trying, trying something and not getting what they think they're supposed to get sooner. You think people are, but it's like, why do people feel like they're going to fail if they just go to the gym and, and, like,

eat the correct, like, amount of what they need to eat? I think, why do people think they're not going to, they're going to fail with that? Because it's just like, it's, it's a, it's a results. Like, yeah, I think it's tooful. You get the results. I think it's tooful.

I think it's, perception of like what should happen for me based on what they see happening for other people which is why I think like the whole steroid and taking steroids or being natty became this like really popular thing on the internet for so long where it's like this conversation between steroids or natty because there's that that innate like oh this person has something that I don't have he must be cheating he must be doing this thing right which I don't necessarily believe or agree that that's cheating whatsoever. I think it's also just like a whole another step that if someone's willing to take, they're willing to take it. It's not for

everyone. But people have that, that's why that concept got so popular is because it's a way out for someone to like not put in the effort or work. And it's the fear of like, why do they have something they don't have? It's a way out. It's their way out. And then the fear of failure in the sense of like if I try this and it doesn't work as fast as I think it should or like what I'm prescribed that it should or someone told me that it would or it, it, it, it, it, it, it, You know, I have a buddy, and it worked like this for him. And if it's not working the same way for me, it's like, Bucket, I think people at the same time are conditioned to, because of the internet that the fucking, this TikTok brain like, yo, or, I mean, even before TikTok, the Instagram, like, oh, everything right here on my fingertips, the postmates, the idea of right now, right now I should have it. That same concept is bled into like people's kind of sort of psyche of how I should have things.

And it's like, that's not how any success is created. that's not how any like great physique has been created that's not how anything great in this world has ever been created it's always through complete failure hard shit and I think like people should go towards more of the hard shit I just think in general like people are kind of coddled and taught to be like

you know if someone's doing something and they're cheating it's like it's an excuse it's like people are just they just want it to be easier because it's hard but that's what life is life is the shit that's hard and if it's hard hard like whether it takes time yeah and it takes time even business and it's not immediate everything is like that yeah it's not just your body like success everything like climbing up in a company or

whatever it is it's like are you putting in the effort needed to have that are you just doing what what you got to do to get by and those people just go in circles in their life yeah and i think it's just like the fear of like if i give it all my all and i still don't get it i'm not good enough and the idea being good enough like i can directly relate to because like that that was a thing that in relationship to losing my father like feeling like i wasn't good enough to have a father made me want like it did the opposite for me it made me want to prove that i was good enough good enough for something and for me very young age it started at the gym and i was like i'm gonna fucking prove that i could be great at this i remember telling my mom like i'm gonna do this for the rest of my life and she's

like yeah okay well you know me and your dad used to work out too i was like no this is gonna be my life like this was fuck fucking 35 now so this was a hundred fucking years ago this was before the internet was a thing before social media existed I just believe that this was gonna make me special somehow and I had no idea how but I was I wanted something in the gym felt tangible that like oh this is this is the first thing in my

life that I felt like I can build something from because it was as simple as benching 95 to 135 being like oh I'm doing something yeah so it's happening here yeah even from that jump from benching like Again, 225, 95 pounds to fucking 135 to 135 and it's 25 and feel like, oh, I'm doing something. Yeah. And then I started to see a physical result. And I'm like, and it took time.

It wasn't like it was just like that. And I was like, oh, shit, I'm just going to keep doing this because I have this even just self-fulfillment of like growth somehow. Yeah. Progress is being made. And then that concept, as I got older, I, you know, I recognized pretty soon in anything that I did, that concept existed. Yep. Exactly. But it's just it's the hard work.

that people are afraid of and there's been times when i've been like fuck this is tough this is so hard can i be good at this i suck at this like something new but the same concept existed as soon as i put the effort in next thing you know two three four months five months a year i was like oh this is way easier than i first perceived it yeah then it goes back to the thing we talked about earlier perception about where you're at so it's just like people just need to be comfortable going towards shit that's hard and difficult and try that's it and just keep trying and keep trying and that's that's that's what life is man yeah it's crazy how much we like wig ourselves out about things before like we even attempt them yeah it's like that's a crazy concept to think like oh

like i'm afraid that if i go to the gym and work out like i'm not gonna like yeah get in better shape so i won't do that that that's like crazy you know what i'm saying that's like saying like oh i'm afraid that it like if i jump in this pool like i'm not going to get wet yeah you know what like all you got to do is do it but you got to eat right that's the thing because i never really made a lot of progress like until i until i actually looked at like what what do i actually need to be eating yeah like you can't just fucking eat whatever you feel like and then and then expect to get the results like yeah everyone's body types off then you just keep going and certainly don't really make any progress you know yeah well bro we got to get in the gym one of these days

you've been in the gym with me a few times yeah we should we should train more that'd be dope it should be good dude is there anything else you want to talk about this was fucking dope yeah it was good yeah really good yeah man i appreciate you having me yeah yeah you should do a podcast or something maybe yeah yeah think about it figure it out yeah because you're good you're like a lot better at speaking than i thought you would be thanks like not not in any sort of disrespectful manner but actually thank you brother um but yeah man i really appreciate you coming on I appreciate you having me and yeah dude

we gotta get to the gym also I'm hungry as fuck me too you need to go eat I'm starving gotta get the protein in yeah I'm running behind

anything else you want to tell them like anything you work on or find you or whatever um fucking just fucking stay prayed up stay prayed up

stay prayed up and tell the ones that you love that you love that you love them yeah I'm working on that myself a lot too yeah yeah oh man why should just tell him you love I just call them up right now yeah I love you I will as soon as I get out this pod yeah yeah it's funny how we talk about I it's so it's and that's a perfect example I'm so good at certain things in my life but it's because I was able to just find maybe

a little bit of like enjoyment in the in the difficulty and then the enjoyment in the other parts it's like afraid and i think the fear comes from like losing because i don't know i think it's something deep inside me because of the loss that fear of getting closer i'm going to lose eventually i'm going to lose the person i'm going to lose the thing whether it's a relationship or a family member like almost like the fear of why be closer if it's for sure going to be gone but then that's like it goes against everything i'm saying at the same time which is so weird in my brain which is why i could understand why people get caught up in those moments it's like that's getting the exact opposite though because i'm not guaranteed forever no one's guaranteed forever and it's like

it's weird well you like also like i know from like my own experience like and i think you can relate to this like it's when you like like with you have like having like so much like going on like you have like this like huge platform that you've built and you've created this like space which is like dope for like people who like I want to do the same thing that you do yeah but you're at like top level at to like come and like have a community and be able to do the same thing and like shoot content and like shoot their own content and also like be a part of your content which is like giving them like their start yeah i would imagine like it would be like so hard to fucking trust people oh man because like there's so many people that like they don't really give a fuck about you

like they're just and they don't even really care to know you like you know they're literally just like hey like be in my fucking video you know what i'm saying and that's like like not or give me the tools yeah yeah and that's like no fucking basis for like any type of like relationship like just a human relationship and i would imagine that would be really fucking difficult yeah you know because i've experienced it and i'm not not with like a just from people just from like it's just from people having proximity to like fame or like this idea of like what they think fame is yeah you know and it's like that is something because it's like you sometimes you feel like man it's like i fucking

i like i'm walking through a den of fucking snakes yeah like i cannot tell who the fuck is like genuine or who the fuck is really just looking for a come up at my expense yeah you know oh i've been there yeah yeah and then it kind of compounds with other sort of life lessons that i'm like learning or going through and then it affects other relationships that are even outside of business and it's just it's a mess man something i work on pretty actively though so how do you how do you how do you how do you how do you how do you uh i've gotten to a point where uh i'll set up whatever sort of precautions i can and if i can i do and then outside of that it's just like if i'm willing to just do it then i'll do it and expect nothing and expect not in a pessimistic

mystic way that they're gonna fuck me over because they could but understanding that if they do then i'm okay and it's it's that like i can't you know i can't there's no get back you can't like take it back it's just like if i'm gonna do it i've just got to the point where i'll do it because i want to and that's it yeah or i just won't do you have any like besides like the gym like any like simple thing that like you do that like recenters you like i saw that shit that clip of lefty gunplay yeah he was like twice a week i just fucking go out to the beach at nighttime when I put my feet in the sand and I don't anything like that and I don't bring my phone you got anything like that uh lately was dope yeah yeah um I mean lately I've been

doing a lot of boxing which is nice but it's just another form of activity as far as like just straight meditation like I mean I'll hit my sauna I will do I honestly it sounds super corny but I will honestly just like sit in my room sometime and just like turn everything off like sit on the fucking floor or lay on the floor and just go through like whatever thoughts i have in my mind and just like let them pass which is just a form of meditation yeah um i i seem to have a problem with like needing to doing something be doing something all the time because like i'll notice i'll turn meditation into like recovery like i'll sit with my red light and like my EMF mat and do the same things but i turn it into like okay i'm getting doing the red light i'm doing the EMF mat and then it's

like i'll do the stim machine and but then the next thing i know i'm just doing a bunch of shit that's still just active and a part of my i think issue has always been just like not avoiding like the thing or the thoughts but like like being able to do a bunch of stuff so like the thoughts are like here instead of like right here in front of me and so as i've gotten older i've tried to spend a lot more time like just whether i'm sitting outside like just literally right outside this podcast room or if i go somewhere like the beach for example and i just sit and i don't do anything and I just kind of let the thoughts go and pass come and go come and go that's when i do get like the most peace yeah because i'm the kind of person that will try to like like i said

fill that space up with like oh i'm doing all this other stuff that's productive and good but it's also still somewhat of a distraction of like being just okay yeah you know i think that's just like i just bright and bring that up because i think that's like so important especially for like younger kids like watching this you know in like their 20s or whatever yeah like because that's like so key like in everybody like whatever whatever whatever it is like there's no right one thing to do like whatever like you grab it way towards that you find like that that gives you that like space yeah is like that needs to be coupled with like everything that we're talking about like going to the gym and like like working hard and becoming more successful and like getting bigger

it's like if you're only focusing on the exterior like then you're actually not like going to progress yeah you'll you'll you'll notice that you falter and you stop or you slow down or you get like fuck i don't want to do this anymore i also want to say one thing on that note that i think a lot of people a lot of people tend to confuse that idea of like looking inward like i said like i would distract myself with other things and call it like oh it's i'm doing that but i was just doing other things would kind of distract myself like marijuana is a good example like i used to smoke weed but like sometimes i would smoke and say oh this is me like meditating but it's it has to be true like completely sober where are you at with your own thoughts nothing added yeah no can be wrong like i'm a

huge proponent of like mushrooms and microdose you know this kind of stuff but there is something to where can you be without anything without any influence without any like fluctuation or adding this or that where are you really yeah and i've been spending time doing that with myself and just honestly focusing on like in the thoughts and the breath and that does help man oh yeah and it creates space honestly for me to be like okay like i'm ready to either undertake like a new project or i'm ready to really put my full effort towards this and i have to kind of keep that inventory of myself like okay am i doing enough of that sort of singular nothing it's reflection yeah but it yeah man i like because we're taught this age is also like go go go grind grind which is necessary absolutely but there's

definitely a loss of okay like what about and i asked i remember i had uh myron and sniko on and i was talking to them about it was like are you really happy and i was relating it to the same sort of concept of like slowing down and just saying like not stopping what i'm doing but stopping within a day for 20 minutes and going like where am i really at yeah how do i really feel yeah not just in relationship to what I have or what I'm going to have or what I want to have or what someone else has but like how do I really feel about myself and doing that has has has really changed my life that's awesome so it's a good question yeah good question I know it's just got a lot going on bro yeah you know yeah but we got to get some fucking protein let's go I love you

man appreciate you coming on you're fucking dope thank you brother yeah yes sir