REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 1039. Q&AF: Giving Advice Vs Letting Go, Leading Without Micro-Managing & Feeling Behind Despite Success

Episode Date: June 22, 2026

On today's episode, Andy answers your questions on how to know when to give advice and when to let people learn through experience, how to lead effectively without micro-managing your team, and how to deal with feeling behind even when you're making good money.

On the flow Now my jury box froze Fuck a pole Fuck a stole Count it millions And a-go What is up guys It's Andy Purcella

And this is the show For the realists Say goodbye to the lies To fictness and delusions In modest society And welcome The motherfucking reality Guys today we have

Q&AF That's where you submit the questions And we give you The answers You can submit your questions A couple different ways DJ's gonna tell you how Yes my brothers and sisters

You guys can submit your questions By email To ask Andy at Handy Ficella.com Or you can Click the link in the description below and submit them there or just drop them in the comment section of the Q&AF videos on YouTube. Thank you, brother. You're welcome.

Yes, sir. Yes, sir. Let's just get right into it. You guys know the deal. We're going to go through three questions here and we need to share the show out. Okay. So if the show makes you think, it makes you laugh, it gives a new perspective. You'll learn something which you will.

Do us a favor and don't be a hoe. Share the show. Greetings. Greetings. What's up? Salutations. What's going on, Doc? Another man.

Yeah, man. Yeah, we're good. It's a great day to be alive. Dude, it's actually a really beautiful day out tonight. And we're in here. I know. Trying to make people better, man. I know, man.

We're dedicated. What are you doing? Yeah, what are we doing? 90% of them just listening don't do shit even. They're even sharing the show. Yeah, man. Fucking rules. Yeah, you know what?

Show's over. Fuck you. Let's just go. No, man. Guys, you know how this works. I got three good ones for you, man. So let's dive into these guys. Andy, question number one.

Andy, I'm 33. And one of the hardest things for me lately has been watching people I care about make the same mistakes over and over again. Same financial problems, same relationship issues, same excuses. At some point, I stopped giving advice because it felt like they didn't actually want help. How do you know when to keep trying to pull people forward and when to let them figure it out on their own? Well, I would ask you, like, what are you doing? Okay, like, how's your stuff look? How's your life going?

Are you in a position to give advice? Have you done anything that's going to make people listen to your advice? You know, we see all these people online giving advice about all these things, but if we really look at their lives, nobody wants it. So you got to realize that for people to want to listen to you, you have to represent something that is worthy of them achieving. Okay. the advice has to be qualified.

And I think with social media, especially, we've come to this time in the world where everybody thinks that their advice is valuable and it's not. You know, not everybody's advice is equal. Not everybody has equal amount of value to provide. And just because you get a microphone and a few followers on social media, it doesn't mean you're giving good advice. So, you know, the truth of the matter is that unless you're achieving something that is worthy of achieving, nobody's going to.

listen to anything that you say and this is a big problem why so many people have problems getting traction as a content creator on the internet well because you haven't done anything okay what have you done what qualifies you to give advice okay so that's the first thing the second thing is is um there's like 2% of the population that actually are achievers and winners okay everybody else doesn't give a fuck they live they live by the list they go to school they get married they have some kids, they never ask themselves what they actually want, and then they go through some sort of midlife crisis, you know, in their 40s because they're like, fuck, I never even thought about what I wanted. So that's most people. So you got to realize that if you're not living something

worthy of them to observe and aspire to be, they're not going to open their eyes to what's possible for themselves. And second of all, even if you do, a lot of them don't want it. Okay. So like, why Why are you that worried about it? Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, bro, the best thing you can do is worry about yourself. Go out and win big. Let the people who are going to also have the propensity to want to win big,

observe that winning. And then when they reach out and they say, hey, man, this is awesome. I want to do this. That's when you say, yeah, you can. Here's what you got to do. So stop giving unqualified advice and wasting your energy on people who quite honestly aren't going to do shit with their lives. It's almost like a sense of like false loyalty

To the wrong people for some reason Well I think when people win You know you want everybody else to win Especially when you're like a normal person And you haven't come from much And you come from you know Regular America And then you realize that you can win

And you realize that it's not as hard as people say Yes it's very hard But it's not impossible And then you realize it's worth it If you're a good person You're going to want that for other people You know, one of the biggest reasons I do what I do is because I understand how normal I am and how regular I am. And I understand that everybody else out there that's normal and regular also has the capacity to win.

But you got to want to win. You got to have those dreams and goals. There's a lot of people that don't, dude. There's a lot of people that don't even think about tomorrow. They don't even think about anything past Friday night. you're not going to magically say something to those people that's going to make them want to do it, even if you want it for them. You know, the best thing you can do is win and then they can see that and then they could say,

oh, shit. And maybe a light ball will go off, but maybe it won't. But if it doesn't, they don't, I mean, you're just wasting your breath. Yeah. Do the advice piece is huge too, man. I feel like we've talked about this before. It's like, you know, being very careful, obviously who you're taking advice from. But it's like just because, you know, somebody can give you.

you good advice in one area of your life doesn't mean that they can give you good advice and all the other areas. I mean, how many, how many of these people have we seen our mind, you know, give business advice and all of a sudden now they're giving marriage advice and then their marriage falls apart and look at fucking idiots. Right. Right. Like, now I believe in Jesus. Yeah, right. It's like that's what it always comes back to. When people are out of options and they've burned their credibility so hard, then they become like, you know, holy rollers. That's right. You know, and I'm not a. dogging on anybody that's, you know, found Jesus and lives that life.

But it is awfully convenient for a lot of these people, right? Like they've done all kinds of bad shit. Now all of a sudden, it's Jesus time. And, you know, that's how it's supposed to be, but not when you're, it's your brand. Yeah. You know, but, yeah, man. I mean, look, dude. Yeah, you're not an expert on everything.

Just because you're winning doesn't mean that you know everything about, everything else. Yeah. You know, so like I try to stick to my lane in terms of navigating personal development and business and how to win and make money and success because I understand that pretty well. I don't give my friend's advice on other areas of shit, you know,

like I'm not giving, uh, my brother parenting advice when I've never had fucking kids. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's real. Let me ask you this. I mean, this is an interesting topic.

How diversified is your friend group at this point? I don't know. You're black. You're fucking Indian over there. You're a Bosnian. I say it's pretty diverse. I mean, I mean,

because your circle is small, right? You know what I'm saying? But have you? Yeah, bro. My friends are all different kinds of people. I'm friend. My, I have friends that are worth a billion dollars or more.

I have friends that are fucking just getting going in life, man. Yeah. To me, you know, but here's the one thing they all have a common. They all want to be better. And whatever it is. Right. So they're all positive people. Yeah.

They all want to win. They're all good people. They're fun people. They usually tell pretty good jokes, except you. All right. Working on it. Yeah, you need to work on that. Right.

But, you know, um, the character qualities are the same regardless of where the financial level is. You know, so and dude, you know, that's a good, well-rounded friend group because, you know, there's a lot of value in helping people who might be younger than me who are hungry and they want to win. Like, I enjoy that just like my friends who are older than me that are more down, they enjoy helping me. And, you know, that's what friends are supposed to do. So, um, I'd say, you know, I think people would be surprised.

Yeah, for sure. You know, I think people probably would be very surprised. Yeah. You know, I don't judge my friendship based on their, uh, their income level and shit like that, which is, which is kind of weird because it seems like a lot of people do. A lot of people do. Yeah. A lot of people do.

I would say that's not real friendship, though. Yeah, but I mean, you look at guys like, I mean, dude, like, we're just talking about Dana for a second. All Dana's friends are like that. Yeah. They're all, they're all different guys from different walks of life who make different amounts of money. but they're all the same character. Type of person.

Yes. Yeah, that's real. And that's what I meant, like the just diversity and expertise. Yeah. More or less. Like different industries, different things. Oh, yeah. But the character is still the same.

Yeah, man, for sure. You know, they're ambitious. They're hungry. They're well-rounded good people. You know, they don't take themselves overly serious. You know, like, I want to hang out with them. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's cool.

You know, I don't like hanging around people who get offended at all, like, because I'm going to offend you. You know what I'm saying? Like, if you get offended it, I automatically, think you're a total pussy because you allow words to affect your emotional state, you know, I can't be friends with pussies. No, it doesn't work. What?

I love it. Yeah, beat them up. That's right. Yeah. Yep. Guys, Andy, crush a number two. Yeah. Hey, Andy.

I'm 31. And I'm about to be promoted to my first. managerial role within my company. I'm very detailed and process oriented, but I don't want to be a micromanager in the new role. How do you navigate not micromanaging your employees? Let me ask you first. Is micromanaging a bad thing?

It depends. It depends on the situation of where the person is. I mean, I mean, dude, look, like, have you taught your girls how to ride a bike yet? I've taught them how to steal one. For sure. No, you're, okay? Well, when you're teaching your little girl to ride a bike,

do you just throw on the bike and say run down the street? Or do you, like, grab the seat behind and, like, you know, run with them, right? In the beginning, when someone doesn't know what they're doing, you know, you're going to, you're going to, what people would call micromanage, which is really just coaching them on how to do the job. And, you know, we're micromanic. So, yes, to answer your question, or no, it's not always a bad thing. Yes, sometimes it's required.

However, micromanaging generally comes from the manager overestimating their own abilities. It's an ego problem. Okay. And what I mean by that is a lot of people who are further up the chain, they assume that they are the only person that can move up the chain. So they're like, I'm up the chain and you're not as good as me and you're not going to do things as well as I am. And so they refuse to let that person ever show them what they're capable of.

And what that creates is a circle, a vicious circle of basically your employees never developing and you always having to try and do everything, which is only caused by your own lack of trust and your overestimation and underestimation of their abilities. So, you know, if a lot of people, they will complain, I'll be like, where do you find good employees? You don't find them. you got to build them and part of that building is that you have to allow them to make mistakes you have to allow them to learn you have to allow them to display what they can actually do to be great if you're always up their ass and you're you're there like you are on day one on day 100 how are they developing at all what are they learning they're not really learning anything

and by the way you're buffering their everybody wants to be very very valuable, okay? And some people have this assumption that like everybody's lazy, but that's, that's not the truth. People want to feel like they contribute. They want to feel like they're part of the team. And when you micromanage people past the point of them, you know, being able to ride the bike on their own and you kind of let them go a little bit, you're, you're suppressing their ability to feel like they contribute. You're also suppressing their ability to actually develop and that creates job dissatisfaction where they end up leaving so then you're in this vicious cycle of people coming in never developing and then leaving because they're frustrated

and you think it's because it's the employees when really it's your poor leadership style yeah so you know micromanaging dude like the fact that you're aware of this is a good question because a lot of people never become aware and i think it's a great question um because a lot of leaders struggle with it you know they think, I know you don't, I'm here, you're not, you're not really able to be here. When that person below you might become even better than you at what you do, and by the way, a lot of people are afraid of that. But as a leader and as a manager, then one of the most valuable things that you can do is develop personnel and replicate your own skill set to your level or even better.

Like if I have a person who I know I could put other people with and they will come out the other end of that tunnel in a year and be fucking amazing, what's that worth to my company? That's worth a lot. Okay. That's worth a lot. So you can't be afraid of letting these people develop because, you know, I'm afraid they're going to take my job. That's like loser thinking. Your job should be, I'm going to make this person the best that they possibly can be. and hopefully they will not only do as good as me,

but hopefully even better. And then by the way, let's say that person does surpass you and eventually, because this happens, eventually ends up being ahead of you. How thankful are they going to be for you helping them? Think of that relationship.

Okay? So it's kind of like, you know, I said I wouldn't give parenting advice, but I'm going to give some. All right? It's kind of like when, you know, if you're a good parent, I think,

You know, your job is to make your sons and daughters more successful and have a better life than you at. Yeah. Right. And that's the same thing as being a leader. And you can't do that if you're hovering over them and micromanaging them the whole time. So, you know, the answer is, you know, yes, it's appropriate sometimes. It's also appropriate when they're off track. Like, let's say you got somebody and you've let them ride the bike and they did pretty good.

And then all of a sudden they start fucking up. well dude they might not have enough awareness to understand where they're messing up so you got to go back and kind of examine and then show them okay here's why you're off and then you know let them go again right and and a lot of people are also afraid to let people make mistakes because it's going to cost the company money you have to transition the way that you think about this if you fire someone every time they cost you money every time they make a mistake you're going to go and you're going to hire a new person and that person's going to come in. And you know what they're going to do? They're going to make that same mistake. And it's going to cost you twice. Then you're going to fire that person again. Then you're going to hire a new person.

That person is going to come in and guess what they're going to do. They're going to make that same mistake. Now you're going to have it three times. So the best way is to allow them a little bit of fucking runway and their ability to make mistakes, protect them from being able to make, you know, company sinking mistakes. and look at that as an investment in their development as one of your key players, right? Okay, you made a mistake. You know, it costs the company $10,000 or $1,000 or $100,000 depending on the size.

Hey, man. Did you fuck that up? Yeah, man, I'm so sorry. What did you do wrong? Well, I did this and this and this. What did you learn? Not to do that. That's right.

Okay. And that's the way that you insulate yourself from having someone and having the company make the same mistake over and over again. So just like we talk about like with success, right, as an individual, there's really, you know, two real things that you got to have. You got to have the ability to persevere when things are hard and you got to have the ability to learn from your mistakes. Well, that's also true for a collective company. Okay. Your company won't develop past where it is right now. if you don't allow the people that make up the collective of the company to make their mistakes,

learn from their mistakes, and then keep moving down the path with them. Okay? So think of, you know, yourself, right? I'm adding my skill set every time I make a mistake and I discover the solution and then I'm, I got to do skill. As a collective, it works the same way. You see what I'm saying? Absolutely, bro.

You know, it's funny, like being around here, for example, just that even at 1P, one thing that I've noticed, too, it's like even when a mistake is made, Not only do they accept the responsibility of it, they take, but how, like, fired up they are to fucking fix it. Oh, yeah. You know what I'm saying? I think that's a big piece, too, that a lot of people don't, like, they're, like, not only allowing them to make the mistake, but there's almost like a chip on the shoulder now. Yeah.

To fix it and make it more than right. Well, especially when it comes to disgruntled customers. I mean, it actually presents one of the best opportunities in business because when a person is upset with your company for whatever reason, maybe it'd be bad service, maybe they didn't. and get their shipment on time. Maybe, you know, you shipped them the wrong shit, you know, who knows what it is. And they're super pissed off. That gives you an opportunity to not just correct that problem, but go extra for that person in an unexpected way and create tremendous amounts of value to wear that person now instead

of thinking that, you know, all these guys don't care and they're just like every other company. Now they're like, holy shit, man, these guys are special. And you get to leverage all the other companies. not giving a fuck about their employees, or I mean, I'm sorry, you get to leverage all of the other companies not giving a fuck about their customers. And this is why customers, like, if you guys, you know, that have real companies and you deal with customers, like a lot of times, you know, you'll make a small mistake and they will come in so hot because that's what they're used to to having to get the problem resolved. But when you could say, hey, dude, I get it. We fucked up.

you know, and then you fix it and do a little extra. Now you've, you've disrupted that person's expectation in a positive way to where they'll never forget that ever again. So the fact that other companies suck is actually a great thing for you. So like a lot of people will ask me, especially in Arta, we get this question. You know, what do we do when customers are just like abnormally pissed off? Well, you got to understand where that comes from.

How many of you guys have dealt with a company? You can't even get a fucking response from. Yeah. They don't give a shit. And then when you bring it to them, they're like, well, tough shit. That's our policy. Right. Like, dude, we've all dealt with that.

We've dealt with that for years. And then when you find a company that actually is like, dude, you're right. We fucked up. I'm going to fix this for you today. And not only am I fix it for you today. And then you do some extra shit for, make, you know, make them know that you value their business. And by the way, notice, I didn't say make them think you value their business. You make them know.

you value their business. That's a big difference. Now you've created a lifetime customer. So the fact that other customers like are other companies treat their customers like shit is a is a huge leverage point if you do shit the right way. Have you seen that that kind of evolved a little bit? Because I'm thinking as you're talking about that, just the, you know, how a lot of other companies, they just suck at that piece.

But combining that with the instant gratification of the, the customer themselves, how we expect everything so fucking quick. Like, has that evolved ridiculously over the last, you know, 27 years you've been in? Have you seen that change? I would say... Like, is there less grace now than there was? Oh, yeah.

I actually think there's two parts to that. I would say, yes, there's less grace because there's... Look, man, I'm just going to toot my own horn here, okay? We were one of the, probably the first company to revolutionize how those things are done the right way. Yeah. Okay? Up until that point, barely any companies gave a fuck.

And if they did, they wrote whole books about them. Okay. Now I would say that the companies have increased their care because they understand how valuable and how competitive it is. And I would also say that what you said was right. I would say that customers' expectations have gotten better too because there are many more companies out there doing it the right way than there were even five to ten years ago. So, but I think that's a good thing, dude, because ultimately what that does is that creates good ethical business. Okay. So the businesses who do things the right way when, it's just capitalism, dude.

The business, the market rewards the companies that do the right thing. The market does not reward the companies that don't. And social media accelerates that. So I see that as a really great thing. And I've noticed myself, like, you know, a lot of the companies that I've dealt with lately, like, for example, I've had to because I got back into riding after taking you know basically like 10 years off of riding I've had to like buy a bunch of new shit bro almost all the all the companies I've dealt with have been amazing you know what I'm saying

I've I've ordered shit from West Coast choppers outside of Jesse's friendship right right perfect fucking service I've ordered things from NBT perfect service I've ordered things from you know Perfect service. Dixon, perfect service. You know, like that that wasn't the case 10 years ago across the board. And I think it's becoming more accepted that people understand they have to do things that way. Yeah, absolutely. Dude. Last little piece on this, I want to ask you because going back to this question about the micromanaging piece of it, you know, there's that age old quote. It's like, you know, if you want it done right, just do it yourself, right? And to your point, though, that that is the ego problem. Where did this idea come from, though? I mean, that's just, I mean, look, dude, if you're unwilling to invest, I think the fundamental underlying problem here is that perception of finding good people

versus building good people, okay? Most people still think that there's like this pool of amazing talent out there that you can just pick from. And, you know, the companies that have tremendous employees, they're just good at picking. that's not what it is man it's that those companies are hiring people that fit their culture and then they're training them on the skill set okay so you have to like remove some of these old ways of thinking that you know oh I'm going to go where do I find good people you can't do that okay so the fundamental reality of what we're talking about is that you have to be

willing to invest in other people you have to be willing to coach them you have to be willing to do things that would be outside of what people would think an employment situation would be you know like maybe the dudes having going through a divorce okay you got to be there for man you got to have talk with them and you know be their friend like it's it's like your part-time coach part-time general you know part-time fucking therapist you know and and that's what it takes man And it's a lot of hats. It is. But companies that aren't willing to do that and they just expect to pay for talent,

you can't pay enough for that kind of talent, not as a small business. You can't. You know, so when you get into sea level stuff like where guys have, you know, like for example, you know, as our company's grown, we've had to hire some sea level guys in from the outside that have experience in certain areas that we don't have. those guys are proven. They've gone here and they've won. They've gone there and they've won.

They've gone here and they won. They come with a skill set. And the challenge with those guys is to get them culturally aligned. Because some of those guys come from different places that do things different. And sometimes they think because their skill set is so good, the other shit doesn't matter. And so you have the opposite problem. Yeah, they're walking like, where's the cake for birthday? Exactly.

Yeah. But like, dude. So, like, there's, there's pros and cons in different situations and different timings, but ultimately you have to get away from this thought that you're the only one that knows, you're the only one that can be good, you're the only one that can do this. And these young little kids don't know shit. Like, bro, some of these young kids run fucking circles around you based upon their hunger and their willingness to learn if you just allow them the rope to run and fucking go learn.

So, you know, yeah, I mean, that's pretty much it. I love it, dude. I love it. Guys, Andy, our third and final question, man. Guys, Andy, question number three. Andy, I've listened to you since the start of 2020. You've changed my life. I'm a single 25-year-old guy earning $176,000 per year.

How old? 25. Okay. I'm making $176K a year, living with my parents. Why do I feel behind? No wife, no kids, what my friends do and have those things. Why do I feel behind?

Because you're an idiot. You don't have the perspective of knowing, okay? You don't understand how far. Dude, when I was 27 years old, I was making $695 a month, and I had to move back in with my dad. Okay? Um, you don't understand how well you're doing because, and by the way, I would say that's great that you're living at home and maximizing your savings and getting your shit together.

I would say, I would say honestly, like, I don't know what you do as long as it's legal. I would say that you are fucking doing exactly what you're supposed to do. You go out and earn, you minimize expenses. and that's going to put you so far ahead whenever you are, you know, in your 30s. And the fact that you're single, I think is smart too because you're not going to attract the level of mate that you could once you have all your shit in line.

And I think a lot of people do all the wrong things. They go out and they get attached to some girl that they met in a bar and they're attached to her because she was willing to fuck them. and, you know, then they go out and try to build a business and they get a nice car and they get out of their, they get a house and they get attached to all this debt. And then they can't do the things that are required to win. You're already doing extremely fucking well. And the truth of the matter is, like I've said many, many times, it, that what you have is a gift.

Okay. Most people don't think like, oh, man, I'm behind. Most people think like, oh man, everything's good. It's all good. I'll take care of it later. It's no big deal. You know, like when I was fat, you know, and I would go drink five, six beers. I'd go in the bathroom with a restaurant, take a piss.

And I'd look in the mirror and I'd stand sideways and I'd suck my gut in. I'd be like, man, you know, I'm looking all right. And I'd tell myself this lie, right, about everything was fine. It was all good. You know, I'd fucking do me. You know what I'm saying? Like, like, I'd make up this story about how. everything was good and that's how most people do about their lives so when you're ambitious and

you're hungry and you're driven you almost always feel behind okay I feel behind I feel like I should be much further down the road than where I'm at and then when I look at the math and I look at the numbers and I look where I'm at that's just factually untrue yeah you know what I mean so don't try to lose that feeling. That's a good thing because that's what's going to keep you moving down the path. But you should also acknowledge once in a while and talk yourself off the ledge and be like, no, I'm doing okay. I just got to keep going.

You know what I mean? Because that can mentally wear you out, bro. Like when you constantly feel behind, especially when you're winning, this is where a lot of overly ambitious people, you know, find themselves in a really dark spot because everything's going well. Everything's, you know, moving. They're doing well. And they're always like, fuck, I'm so behind. I'm so behind. I'm so stressed. And they live in this constant state of high stress and anxiety because they refuse to have gratitude for how far they've come. And this is why when we talk about like what happiness is really derived of, you know, gratitude is a massive part of it. Okay.

You know, the other parts are discipline and purpose. You know, if you're missing, any one of those three ingredients in your life, you're not going to be happy. So you could have a big purpose and high discipline and be out-earning everybody you know at your age. But if you can't remember where you came from, you're going to feel shitty. Okay. Again, you could be grateful for where you are, be earning all kinds of money and not have a bigger purpose and you're going to feel shitty. Okay. You can be, you can have a big purpose and you could be grateful for where you are. But if you're not at control of your license and you lack discipline you're going to feel shitty so you have to have all three of those components in order to feel happy and I would say for you what's happening is you're

refusing to ever have a moment or consciously think about where you've come from and what you've put in and I think it's important and I think you probably don't do that because you don't want to get complacent and that's that's a big problem with high achievers high achievers I fall into this it is a big problem for me. High achievers don't like to take credit or give themselves credit. It's the opposite of what people think. Most people think that high achievers want all the credit and all the shit. True, like killer high achievers, they try to stay away from that because they are terrified

that that's going to like dull their edge and that it's going to keep them from winning. And it won't. You've just got to make some dedicated time on a daily basis to be grateful. and a lot of that comes from, you know, I think prayer, you know, sitting down and saying, man, God, you're really taking care of me, man, and, you know, I really appreciate it, you know, and just being grateful for where you're at. And I think it'll help you deal with what you're dealing with. But, dude, I don't think having that feeling of being behind is something that it makes something,

it doesn't, it doesn't, it's not wrong. Yeah, it's not an alarm that you need to go turn on. No. Yeah. Yeah. What would you also say too, though? I mean, you know, 25, we have a, you know, we have a lot of younger listeners to this show, too. But it's like, I mean, you're only 25, though.

Yeah, but like, dude, when you're only 25, you, you don't realize how fast you go from 25 to 45, okay? Because you've only gotten to 25. So you feel like you've lived this really long life. You know what I'm saying? It's just perspective, dude. Yeah, like you don't understand how early you are. That's like when people are like, oh, man, I'm 35. And I feel so old.

It's like, bro, I would trade places with you in a fucking second as long as I got to keep what I know. You know what I mean? And by the way, I share with you what I know. And you can be 35 and know what I know. You see what I'm saying? So like, that's just perspective, dude. When you're, you know, when you're 25, you think you're old, you know, when you're,

you know, how many, like, dude, I remember on my 22nd birthday, man. I was like, fuck. I remember exactly where I was. And I was like, fuck 22. Man, I'm old. Like, you know what I'm saying? Because like, I wasn't 21 anymore. Yeah.

You know, and I'm like, 22. What does that mean? Like, you know, I don't get any prize for being 22. And then now I look back. I'm like, how ridiculous was that? Wow. And then I felt the same way at 30. And I'm like, how ridiculous was that?

You know? And then I felt the same way at 40. I'm like, fuck, dude, 40 sounds all right right now. You know what I mean? So it's all perspective. perspective, dude. And you don't know what you haven't been down. So I think that's a normal feeling. And I think I think it's a good thing to feel behind because that's what drives you to continue to push down the path. So I wouldn't try to like get rid of that. I would just try to counterbalance the anxiety and the stress that comes with that with gratitude for how far you've come. You know, I think another thing that contributes to this obviously is the internet, right? We have all these 22 year old kids talking about how, you know, throwing these numbers. around like it ain't shit oh i made i saw this dude the other day he's like oh man you know i've had 10 million dollar months get the fuck out of here dude like they're just throwing around these numbers dude

you know oh my company does a hundred million a year like it like it like it ain't shit to do a hundred million dollars a year are you fucking serious do you know many companies do a hundred million dollars a year very very very very few okay and these kids are running around throwing these numbers around completely lying with no ethics whatsoever and then you have these other people who are doing four million dollars or two million dollars who by the way that's a really good start who are like fuck man i'm behind i suck at this no dude you're comparing against yourself against something that doesn't even exist right like if i were to like if there was some like if iron man was a real thing right and like tony stark was a real dude and like there's really an iron

man and he's making all this shit, which I guess Elon Musk is kind of like that. But, you know, outside Elon Musk. Like, you know, like, let's say you had a guy that, like, figured out how he could fly with no fucking technology and shit. We'd all be like, fuck. And then find out one day, he's made the whole thing up. And we're all feel like shit because we couldn't fly. You know what I'm saying? Like, so it's just an illusion, man. And I think that contributes to that feeling as well. But I don't think that's a bad thing. I think it's a good thing to feel behind. because that keeps you moving down the path. And nothing kills entrepreneurs or businesses more than complacency.

So what's the opposite of complacency? It's drive. It's hunger. It's ambition. It's feeling behind. It's being competitive. And that's why I always tell people, you know, when they say, oh, well, comparison is a thief of joy.

No, not really. Not if you're trying to win. It's only a thief of joy if you're sitting on your ass. You know what I mean? If you're trying to win, it's what drives you to win and produce all these other good things in your life. So you just got to make sure you're comparing to the right things. You know what's crazy about this question? So like when I was reading it, I'm like, all right, 25 year old, you're making that much and you're still living with your parents. I think that's a

good thing. But now looking at it's like shit, that actually probably ain't that bad. No, bro, listen, listen, man, you should stack and minimize your fucking liabilities and stack your cash flow and income for as long as you can who gives a fuck what anybody says about it yeah because that's going to ultimately put you in a much better position now if you're living with your parents at 35 and you ain't trying okay now you're a fucking loser all right we got talking about yeah but you know if you don't have a wife and you don't have kids and your parents are cool with it and you're able to stack you know that's in line with almost every culture around the world okay like America is the only place where their kids turn 18 years old and they're supposed to go out and start over on

their own. That's not how it works in almost every other place. In almost every other culture, the kids grow up and the family contributes to put the kids out in a favorable position to do better for the family. And then the younger kids grow up and then they take care of the family. And that's how almost all, and you want to know why like the family structure here is broken. And well, because every time their kids turn 18, it gets it gets broken intentionally. You know, they get them out, get on your own, get out there and get a fucking job.

Cool, I can get down with that, but like, how about, you know, we keep the family together and minimize the financial liability, we all get ahead. Oh, fucking overhead, it's right. Yeah, bro, that's what happens in most cultures. So like, we're one of the only places that does that. It's so taboo here. Well, but we got to, why?

Yeah. Where's that come from? And why is it? it because it creates more tax revenue, it creates more debt, it creates more worker bees, and they're less successful long term because of that mentality. So I personally don't have a problem with people staying at home as long as they can to stack and get their mind and their business and their life together. I mean, if I had kids, I'd be, like if I had a kid and he was 25 and he was living with me

and he's out making fucking couple hundred grand. I mean, I might make him buy me some fucking dinner once in a while. That's right. You know what I'm saying? But like, I'd be like, all right, dude. You know? And then when you meet a girl or you meet a, you know, and you want to move out and do your thing, like, you're going to be in a good position to do that.

That's real, bro. That's fucking real, man. That's just my personal opinion. That's real. I wasn't thinking of it like that. I know, but that's because you've been told your whole life that if you're fucking 18 years old and you live with your parents, you're a loser. Well, I was out at 17.

Well, it's crazy. I mean. There's nothing wrong with that either. I mean, it definitely teaches you how to fucking survive. I had, but it was like, didn't have to be that way. Well, shouldn't be that way. Well, I mean, look, there's flip-flops to it, right? Like, there's also the fucking side of it where it's like, okay, well, then they never learn

independence. They never learn how to live. They never learn how to do the things. Well, if you're a parent and you're allowing your kid to stay in, you know, the house and they're out earning money, then wouldn't it make sense to, like, teach them how to manage the money and teach them how to pay bills and, you know, like, maybe that's what it, because it's either the complete, it's either, yeah, because it does, dude, I think, I think, I just think there's nuance to it. Yeah. I think, if you have a loser kid who's sucking you dry,

who's 25, and who isn't doing shit because it's comfortable at home, you should fucking kick him out. Yeah, and you're probably being a crutch. Okay. But if you have a kid who's 25 and he's pulling 200 Gs a year and he's working his fucking balls off and he's getting better and better, I would have more leeway with allowing him to stick around and get his shit stacked up. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, I don't know. That's just me.

Maybe I'm wrong. But like I said, I try not to give advice on things I don't know. But hypothetically, that's how I think about it. No, I love it, dude. I love it. I'm 31, dude. I don't know my dad. Well, you want to move in?

We can make something happen. I can make something happen. No, man, I love it, dude. Guys, that was three. All right, guys. Well, let's get out there. Let's have a good week. Let's win.

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