REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 147. Two Tools Champions Use To Win

Episode Date: September 30, 2021

If you ever try to do anything more than the ordinary, you’ll face negativity and resistance. On today’s episode, Andy talks about the two tools champions use to consistently keep winning, why you shouldn’t let other people impose their insecurities on you and how you can convert negativity into productive action to achieve your goals.

What's up guys, it's Andrew Frisella and this is the show for the realest, say goodbye to the lies, the faintness, and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today I've got a real talk for you. I've got something that's on my mind and heart that I want to share with you, and it's nothing new. I've shared it with you before, but I think it's a good reminder. But before I get into it, I would like to remind you to pay the fee. If you get some value out of this, if it makes you think, if it makes you laugh, if it makes you learn, if it gives you a new perspective, if it helps you through a tough time, whatever it may be, if it provided value, all we ask is that you share the show. We don't run ads. I don't run ads

for the show or on the show. And I do that because I like straight value exchange. That's how I think things should work. That's how I like to operate. So if you like it, pay the fee, be a good person. If you don't like it, cool. So anyway, here's the thing that's on my mind. And I've been talking about this for a few days now on my Instagram because it's in the air. And I want to give you a realist perspective about this subject. Okay. Let me explain something to you. When you go out and try to do anything outside the norm, and I'm talking anything outside the norm, you are going to be faced with negativity. You are going to have people

misunderstand you. And because they misunderstand you and because you are doing something that they don't do, whether they agree with what you do or not is irrelevant. They're just not familiar with it. Okay. And what do people do when they don't understand things? They usually attack them. They usually put negativity towards it. They usually attack them. They usually put negativity towards it. They usually project their own insecurities and their own reservations about what it is they are incapable of doing and they put them on you. And so when you start out in business or you start out on a weight loss journey or you start out to be a better person, you are going to face negativity. And I don't give a shit what any of these frou-frou, fluffy guru motherfuckers out there tell you, okay?

Everybody likes to pretend this is an ideal place. They like to think that everything's really going to be nice and it's going to be easy and it's going to be this. And I just have a really hard time telling you guys that shit because it's not true. And that, and when you go out and you experience the negativity and you experience these things, I'm going to talk about here in just a second. Um, you think it's you and that handicaps people. And I don't believe in that. I, this is why I have a big problem with critical race theory. This is why people shouldn't be telling people when they're two, three, four, five, six years old, that they're not going to be able to accomplish things because of the color of their skin. This is why you can't allow people to squash dreams in the education system. All right.

When I was in high school, I was told, and you guys have heard the story. I was told very directly, Andy, you're not cream of the crop. You can't go to those schools. You're going to have to go to the community college. Those schools are for cream of the crop and you're not it. That stuck with me. And luckily, I had enough courage and enough spite in me to make these motherfuckers eat their words. Okay. But not everybody does. And that's why I want to talk about this today, because you need to develop that if you're going to be successful. If you can become someone that can transfer negativity into productive action, you are literally unstoppable by outside circumstances and outside elements. The only person that can stop you when you're able to do this is you.

And the way you stop you is you can burn yourself down, right? You can get too negative. You can get too hot. You can get too frustrated. So it's something that you need to learn how to pivot on, but also control in a productive way. And that's what I'm going to talk about with you guys today. So you guys all know what I'm talking about. You all have friends that tell you shit like, hey man, what do you think? You're too good for us now. Or you know what? I don't think that's a good idea for you to do this. Or you know what? You're too fucking fat to do this. Or you're too stupid or you're too lazy. Or you come from this and these are your kind of people. You're not one of those kind of people. We always hear these things. We hear them from the people who love us the most and these are your kind of people. You're not one of those kind of people. We always hear these things. We hear from the people who love us the most and who are supposed to support

us the most. And it hurts because of that. And it slows us down and it makes us question ourself and it squashes our confidence. And for most people, it makes them give the fuck up. And I'm not with that. All right. I'm here to give you the permission and the tools and the real lessons that you're going to need to move forward. And one of them is 100% what I'm talking about here. You have to learn to take the negativity that people are going to, not might, not maybe, not it could happen. They're going to put it on you. And you have to be able to take that energy and flip the switch and move into productive action. So since we know these things are going to happen and you are going to be faced with these negative energies pointing at

you from the people that you care most about, we know it's going to happen. Doesn't it make sense to learn how to utilize that for your desired outcome? Because it does to me and it's been very effective and it doesn't matter what these fucking feel good motherfuckers say out there. This is something you need to learn. So I need you to pay attention real quick. Okay. There's two things that you need to understand. One, the reason these motherfuckers say this shit to you is because they couldn't do it. It has nothing to do with you. It has nothing to do with you. The reason your teachers, the reason your parents, the reason people close to you, the reason people say this negative shit to you has nothing to do with your capabilities. It has to do with their capabilities. They weren't able to do things.

They weren't able to execute on their dreams. And so because they weren't able to execute on what they really wanted and they settled for something they didn't, they now think that that's the normal way to do things because we all look at life through our own perspective. We all look at life through our own set of glasses and their glasses say, those dreams are for other people. Obviously I couldn't do it and neither could you because you come from the same place I come from. And that's what it is. It has nothing to do with you. Okay. So you have to understand that when these people, even if it's your parents, even if it's your aunts, even if it's your uncles, even if it's

your guidance counselor, what they are doing is they are projecting their lack of ability to execute and build onto you. Okay. That's the first thing. The second thing, because that's going to happen. So the second thing is what the fuck do we do with that? How do we deal with that? It's really simple. And I said this on my Instagram story yesterday. I'm on the bike. I'm sweating my ass off. I got swept, dripped down my face. And I'm thinking to myself, I fucking love this. And the reason I fucking love it is because of all those motherfuckers that told me I was a fat fuck three or four, five, six, seven years ago on the internet. I am so thankful for you guys who did that because now my life is great. Now I'm very satisfied with who I am and I'm hungry to even go past this point all because you guys threw so much negativity at me for being

overweight that I stuck. And for that, I am indebted. All right. So you can enjoy me getting better every single year from here on out because of the words that you use. And I am very appreciative and I mean that in a very genuine way. All right. But that's how you need to look at it too. Okay. And what I did was I used a very specific tool that I talk about called a production pivot. The production pivot is very simple. When you are reminded of something that you need to do, or you are given negativity, or you are given some sort of discouraging comment towards an area that you know needs to be addressed, you use that as a trigger to

automatically get up and go take action towards that goal. All right. So when motherfuckers call me fat, I got off the fucking couch and I went for a walk. Okay. That was it. And that's what I've learned to do. It's very simple. When people tell me shit that is negative, I take that energy. I take that frustration. I take that pain and I go address whatever is causing the pain because the reason it's causing pain for you is because it's true. All right. You have to acknowledge that this is called real AF. I'm going to give you the real shit. The reason people call you fat is because you're fucking fat. You're the one that thinks that that's mean. It's not mean, it's the truth. Okay. So what do you do with the truth? You

address the truth. And if you address the truth and you're able to be honest with yourself, which is a hard thing to do, right? None of us like being attacked. None of us like being told we're less than none of us like, but the reason those things hurt is because inside we know the truth. If it was complete bullshit, right? Like if some motherfucker came up to me right now and said, Andy, you're a fat fuck. I'd fucking laugh at them. I'd rip up my shirt and show them my fucking abs. And I'd be like, Oh really? You know, like it'd be a joke. But when I was fat, I get really mad because guess what? It was true. All right. And that sucks, man. It sucks to let yourself go. It sucks to be broke. It sucks to not have shit going on. It sucks to be a loser. I've been all those

things. But the difference is I was able to take the words that other people put on me and to go immediately take action towards the goals. So when you're able to use these things, guys, when you're able to use the negativity, guys, when you're able to use the negativity into productive action, you become someone who cannot be stopped. And like I mentioned earlier, you can only stop yourself by focusing too much on the negative. The key here, guys, is to use it, see it for what it is, unemotionally, get up, go fucking do it, all right, and work to be better and let it go after that. You don't got to hold grudges. You don't got to be, you don't got to burn yourself down or beat yourself

up because you're taking action to fix the problem and you can feel good in that. Right? So that's the first thing. The second thing is after a production pivot, guys, you have to learn to embrace test days. Okay. This doesn't really have as much to do with negativity as it has to do with things just not going the right way. We all have days that we wake up and fuck it before you even get out of the driveway, you're pissed off. All right. I know I do literally three, four times a week. I have that. The key to getting through that shit is to not dwell on it and to see it as an opportunity. All right. When things aren't going your way, it's an opportunity to do better. It's an opportunity to get stronger. It's an opportunity to strengthen your grit, your perseverance, your fortitude,

all of these things that make up what it is that you must have. you have to have these qualities to be successful. So instead of looking at it as a bad day, look at it as an opportunity to push through so that you can move through the day and make a deposit into your skillset that will serve you long-term. All right? This is very simple concept. When things don't go your way is an opportunity to test the skill set of mental toughness, which embodies a whole bunch of different things. Self-belief, self-confidence, fortitude, grit, perseverance, the ability to endure, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I go fucking on and on. But the skill of mental toughness is a skill that you must have. And when you have a day that isn't going your way, that's a gift.

And it's a gift because you get to test yourself. And when you pass the test and you got through the day and you push yourself through, even if you had to drag yourself through every motherfucking step of that day, when you get through that day and you look in the mirror and you say, motherfucker, I passed that test. Nobody can fuck with me. That's a powerful thing. And you make a deposit into your psyche that reminds you of how badass you really are. The reason most people can never cultivate the mental toughness necessary to succeed isn't because they weren't gifted with it. Nobody's

gifted with it. It's developed. Most people think that these skills are actually character traits. They're not character traits. They are perishable skills. Meaning if you don't invest in them, they will go away. If you invest in them, they will get stronger. Just like your arms, just like your legs, just like all the muscles in your body. When you test them, they get stronger. Your life is no different. Your brain is no different. stronger. Your life is no different. Your brain is no different. How you see things is no different. So the next time you have one of these days where shit just isn't going your way, remind yourself that it's an opportunity to grow.

It's an opportunity to test yourself. It's an opportunity to know what the fuck you're actually made of. All right. This sort of thinking is what champions do. This is how they see the world that you guys might be listening here. And you're like, fuck, this guy sounds fucking crazy. No, this is just the shit. Nobody wants to admit everybody faces negativity. The highest level, most positive performing, talking, speaking people on earth. They all know exactly what the fuck I'm talking about. They just don't talk about it because it doesn't sound good. It doesn't sound

positive. It doesn't sound fluffy, but I will tell you it is the most effective fucking success tool that you will ever, ever cultivate because the amount of negativity that you will face pursuing goals that are outside the norm is unfathomable to people who do not fucking pursue it. Period. Okay? You are going against the cultural norm of average. The cultural norm of sitting on your ass.

The cultural norm of being a fat ass. The cultural norm of all of this average shit. When you go against that, you are going to naturally have resistance. So you need to be prepared. You need to invest in learning these skills of the production pivot and the test day, and you need to put them into play every single time. And if it changes your perspective and it makes you understand that this negativity is actually an opportunity to get stronger, how much more powerful can you become? You can do anything because that energy source is unlimited in the world, especially now,

especially with the way society is now. Society isn't about winning anymore. It's about fucking going with the flow. It's about being happy. It's about being healed. It's all this fucking shit, right? And I'm not saying that shit isn't important, but what I am saying is when you're driving to achieve and you're driving to be better and you're driving to be stronger and you're driving to be great, you are going to face resistance. And if you don't know how to handle that resistance, it is impossible for you to become who it is you want to become. So the production pivot and embracing the test days are two huge things that you need to learn to do literally on a daily basis. The next time somebody calls you fat, go on a fucking 30 minute walk. The next time someone

says you ain't going to be shit, work on your business plan, read a book, not, and no fucking Harry Potter shit. I'm talking about a book on skills. Okay. The next time someone says, you know, whatever it is, take that as an opportunity to turn around and go do exactly what they're addressing to get better. And guess what happens when you do this? Your life becomes the total shove it down motherfucker shit show. Okay. Like everything you become becomes exactly what they told you you weren't going to become. And I'm going to tell you that feels pretty good. I've done it my whole life. I've made a career out of it. It feels good. And I don't care what

anybody tells you. If anybody tells you any different, they ain't fucking done it. They're probably a professional fucking coach. All right. So think about those things. Think about how much negativity you have. Think about pivoting that negativity into production action. And think about that the next time you have a bad day. It's an opportunity to test yourself to see if you really are about what you say you are. And if you pass the test, you just made a huge deposit into your psyche, into your character, into who the fuck you are. Now, when you fail the test, it takes away. When you fail a test, it's a withdrawal. It makes you feel less than, it makes you less confident. It makes you less of a believer in yourself. So think about these things, guys. Most of you are going through life and you're saying, oh man, that guy's just a

dick. Or you know what? I just had a shitty day and you're missing a huge opportunity to use a tremendous energy source that is out there. That is plentiful. That will be in your motherfucking face naturally. And if you can take the most plentiful energy source that's out there and turn it into productive action, what the fuck can stop you? Nothing. Nothing Went from sleeping on the floor Now my jewelry box froze Fuck a bowl, fuck a stove Counted millions in the cold Bad bitch, booted swole Got her on bankroll Can't fold, that's a no

Headshot, case closed