REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 165. Q&AF: Best Traits For Business, Approaching Losses & Identifying Advantages Against Big Sharks

Episode Date: November 4, 2021

In today's Q&AF episode, Andy answers your questions on the traits he looks for in a person when hiring them, how to approach a devastating loss in business & life, and the advantage brick-and-mortar companies have when facing larger companies in the same industry.

What's up guys, it's Andy Priscilla and this is the show for the realest, say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality today we have aq and af and as always i am joined by my handsome co-host hey hey hey white lightning white lightning baby what's up bro hey what's the fee tell them about the fee guys you got to pay the fucking fee all right and and first of all to you guys because we get them right it's the same people right and and first of all to you guys because we get them right it's the same people right and we appreciate you guys yeah i really really do and i and i know it sucks because we're not able to get everybody but share the fucking show guys please share the show all right if you get something out of it yeah if you get something out of it tell them

if it makes you fucking better amen hallelujah tell them man share the shit man like i feel like we were just talking about this man we're you know we're crazy you're speaking the gospel black jesus black jesus can we pray to black jesus is that okay jesus was korean jesus jesus was probably more black than he was white that's highly possible i know that that's going to make some controversy. Pretty sure he had a good tan. Diverse Jesus. That's right. Yeah.

I mean, guys, share the show, man. Get something out of it. Makes you laugh. This show should be. I mean, fuck. That's what? Minute in. Yeah.

I mean, fuck. You laughing already? Share the fucking show. Share it right now. Just stop what you're doing and share the show. Cool. Good job. You're coming up in the world, bro. I share it right now. Just stop what you're doing and share the show. Cool. Good job. You're coming up

in the world, bro. I got a good mentor. Hey, who is he? Sal? Sal, yeah. He's a doctor. You're smart listening to the doctor.

Yeah, Dr. Sal. Yeah. It's about as smart as listening to all them other doctors. No shit. All right. So Q and A F. Q and A F, baby. All right, let's go. Q and A F. It's about a smart list of all them other doctors. No shit. All right. So Q and A F.

Q and A F, baby. All right, let's go. Q and A F. How's it work? So guys, I asked Andy three questions and as always, you can email your questions

into askandy at andyfrasella.com. I read them out and we see what he says. Sounds good. question number one. So, so this has to do

with, with, with business, people that you meet in business or even just in personal life, what are the top three characteristics or traits that you look for in people to either deal with them in business or even just in personal life? Like, are there, are there the same three traits or are they different? You know, I don't, I don't break it down like that. I think everybody's got their own unique, uh, traits that make them,

uh, interesting or valuable. Um, you know, I, I try not to have preconceived notions. And then what I try to do is identify people's gifts because as an operator of a business, um, we have use for all different sorts of talents and everybody has different propensity for talents or skills or gifts. So if you close your mind down to the aspect of these are the top three qualities, you're going to end up with the same kind of person. And what's going to happen is you're going to try to fit that same kind of person into all these different roles that actually require different traits and different skills, or different gifts. So I try to look at people with an open mind and identify what they have. But the things that are like must have,

for me, there are some things, right? Like I have to have someone who is, um, a realist, right? Someone who can identify the tasks for what they are or identify the situation for what it is and react to the actual factual situation, uh, emotionally. Yeah. Unemotionally. Like, you know, when we're running a business, we're trying to run a play in business, um, and execute that play perfectly. I don't really give a fuck how you feel about it. You know what I'm saying? Like, and this is, this is reality and that's the, that's the world and perspective and worldview that I operate in. So I don't like to be around people who are high maintenance, uh, bring me their emotional issues, um,

complain about what's going on at home. Those things to me, devalue people in, in my eyes. Um, cause I'm not here to be your counselor. I'm here to help you make a fuck ton of money. And we do that by changing people's fucking lives. So we have to react within the real, I think that's probably my main thing. My main thing is that you're able to look at the facts. You're able to put your personal feelings maybe over here to the side and open your mind to different perspectives. You know, there's other things too. Like I got to have people around me that are open to learning new skills on their own because we're constantly moving in a million different directions. And if I don't have people who are open to learning and developing, for

example, like in a lot of corporate structures or business structures, you get people that come in and they say, well, I'm this. Well, hey, motherfucker, I need you to be this plus a little bit of that that that well that's not my job well then guess what you don't have a fucking job yeah you're right it's not your job that's right so like you know people who can take initiative you know honestly like our core values of our of all of our companies are really non-negotiable but um yeah i think it's important to understand that not everybody's going to have the same skill set. And if you look at people through a one, two, three type view, you're going to cause yourself a lot of pain in business over the years because what you'll do, and I did this, this is why I'm

speaking about it. You'll develop people in the same framework and then try to stick them into jobs that requires a different framework. And it just won't work and what'll end up happening is you'll end up believing that those people are bad and they suck when in reality they could be a rock star over here there's a book all about this called good to great um you could get it anywhere i wouldn't get on amazon get somewhere else but uh that book will explain the concepts that i'm talking about you know i don't i just don't believe in narrowing it down that hard because everybody's so different you know what i'm saying yeah that makes perfect sense man fuck i was not

expecting that's such a great answer well dude i mean like a creative type person is a creative you know uh a type a is a type a. You know, you need all kinds of different character qualities and skills and traits to make a business run. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And those needs are ever changing. Yeah, for sure. Yeah. And dude, the person who might be qualified to, you know, run, let's say a retail operation may not be the same person who's qualified to

uh run the entire operation right you know i'm saying um or maybe that's not the person that you could plug into your creative department they probably struggle there right you see what i'm saying yeah so like you have to figure out where everybody fits uh and i think a lot of people spend a lot of time trying to make everybody fit into their framework. And that's why they can't ever get a culture to really grow. Right. Cause it's like, dude, you walk through our businesses and our companies. It's not that everybody's the same.

People are very different. People of all backgrounds, all different, uh, cultures, uh, you know, all the differences that make up society. We've got them all. For sure. But the reason that people gel is because of the foundational principles that we all believe in regarding core values. You know, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Do the right thing.

Stay loyal to the mission, loyal to each other. Take initiative, accept responsibility. You know, believe like all these things that we talk about um make up the framework of of the foundation of the individual uh and then the the at the front end it's it's we all kind of do what we're good at would you say that's easier i mean follow-up question i'm sorry but would you say that's easier now because the culture is so strong that like that initial checklist like yeah your hiring process is so much faster now because people know the culture is so strong that like that initial checklist, like your hiring process is so much faster now because people know. The culture maintains itself. Yeah. Like they know what to expect. Like dude, people that wash out of our company don't, they don't wash out because

I identify their weaknesses. They wash out because the other team, the other team members do. So yeah, it's definitely easier when you get bigger, but it's also harder when you get bigger for other reasons because you don't have like i don't have contact with the thousands and thousands and thousands of reps that work off-site from us right you see what i'm saying right so um it becomes more challenging when you expand in that way but because the core values are so basic in terms of like just doing the shit that i feel like and and I think everybody knows you're supposed to do. There should be values everywhere.

That's right. Yeah. Like it makes you bond. And because our mission is very clearly customer focused in anything that I'm involved in, I think we disproportionately provide value versus what we ask for in return. You know, that makes it easier. But like, yeah, dude, in the beginning, when you're first starting and you're out there trying to build a company and you've got you, maybe a business partner,

maybe one or two other people, that is the best time to start these things and to take them serious. But most people at that level don't take them serious because they are in such control over the day-to-day dialogue that they never systemize their culture. Does that make sense? So like, because it would just be me, you and Madat in an

office and I get to talk to you every day, we all inherently know what the culture is. So we never define it and we never define like how our core values and what we should operate and what our standards should be because we all know the standard right and this is the this is the paradox of being a small business person you might have good culture right now because you've got three tight or four tight crew people right yeah but what happens when you take what happens if you were to take those four people and make them uh and expand to 40 people today you see see what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah, yeah. You couldn't control the culture with those four people because there's not enough face time to create it. So how do you create it, right?

And that's why you have to define it and build the system early. But the reason most people don't build it early is because they think they already have it. They're not thinking ahead. Yeah, they're not thinking big enough either. Correct. So if you're the small guy right now

and you're thinking, man, I really love to have a culture like some of these companies that I look up to do, the best plan is to start now. You know what I'm saying? And be serious about it because like a lot of people don't take their system seriously when they're small. You know, they hire, it's me, you and, and, and Madat here. And then we bring in Joe and we don't like take it serious because we feel like it's a kind of a hodgepodge small operation. And so it never takes, you know what I mean? And so what you have to do is you have to be a strong leader. Um, you have to be serious about it in the beginning, even when people will snicker and laugh and not really, and not really maybe take you serious yeah

you've got to force yourself your will upon them in in the very beginning stages that this is the fucking way it's going to be i had to do the same thing lost a lot of people that way but if i hadn't imposed my will that this was the fucking standard we sure as fuck wouldn't be here. You see what I'm saying? So it's, it's, yeah, it's an involved question. Yeah. But I would say just like most things in life, the earlier you get on top of it, the earlier it gets in, you get a grip on it. Yeah. That's real.

All right. Question number two. So we've, we've all been there. We've all struggled. Right. When you encounter what may seem to be like a devastating loss, whether it's your job, your car, your spouse, whatever it is. Right. What are some steps that you take to, quote unquote, bounce back? Right. Like what steps would you suggest to somebody who just got done? You know, they just got fired from the vaccine mandate or, you know, they just lost whatever it is, right? What would you say are the first steps to get back on track? Well, I think the first step is to understand that things change. I approach life understanding every day that things could change today. I've had, I had so many drastic things happen to me in very short amount of times over the course of my life. Like when I was stabbed or in 2012, when they thought that I

had a brain tumor and it turns out to be a cyst for two weeks, I thought I was going to die. So I've had these situations that have basically brought me to a realization that everything is fucking temporary. Even your life, your life is temporary. So with that being understood, it would be an ignorant thought or an arrogant thought to think that hardships are not going to happen to you. They're going to happen to you. So you have to learn that this shit is going to happen. It's a part of life. It happens to everybody.

Every single fucking human has extremely, extremely, extremely dark times, extremely challenging times, extremely hard times that they have to overcome. And that honestly is the meaning of life. In my opinion, the meaning of life is to overcome the obstacles and set the example for the next generation, uh, to show them how you handle these things as they come. And we've done a very poor job of that as a society here in America, in my opinion. The entire society now is based upon this victim culture. People compete over how bad their lives are online

for attention. Everybody has a sob story that's worse than yours. And that's the instant gratification culture, right? Like if I could tell a sad enough story, then I get more likes and like, bro, you're competing over who's the bigger bitch. Right. Let's be fucking real. Okay.

The real champions, the people who fucking, you probably never hear about because they don't fucking cry about every little fucking hangnail that they get in their life are the people who win. And it's, and a lot of people think, oh, well that guy's a fucking billionaire. So he's probably never had those obstacles. No, it's just that he doesn't complain about them openly on the internet for fucking attention. That's the truth. And so people who are high achievers, you know, one of my good buddies, David Goggins, a lot of you guys follow him. He's a fucking awesome dude. Goggins hates everybody. Okay.

I'll be real. He'll fucking tell you that too. But in the same sentence, he's got the biggest heart of anybody you'd ever know. And you would have to understand that because that's why he puts the content out. He puts the content that he puts out. I put the content that I put out because I know it's fucking hard and I know it's going to be hard. And sitting here telling you that it's not going to be hard is a lie. And that's what some of these guru fucks do. They go out there and they, they placate to your emotions and try to empower you, empower you to be vulnerable.

And in reality, what they're creating is this victim culture that's fucking weak as fuck. Okay. And, and I'm not saying you can't be vulnerable. Like when I got fucking problems, I tell you about him. Do I tell you about him? I tell DJ about my problems all the fucking time. Do I get on the line and talk about the same problems? No, I don't. Because you know what? No one fucking cares. And half the people that saw my shit would be happy that i had those problems and and then half of those half half of those people would then do things intentionally to create more of that for me so a lot of you guys that complain online realize you're giving all the enemies that you have the exact recipe to fuck with you okay nobody could fuck with me because i don't let you know where I'm fucking soft. All right. Nobody fucks with Goggins because he's going to let you know where he's soft.

We handle our own shit. We realize that shit is hard and we fucking tell you how to overcome it. So for me, it's controlling the things that you could control. The fucking whole world can fall apart. I can still control some basic shit. I can control how much fucking water I drink. I can control how much exercise I have. I can control what kind of information I put in my brain. I control what kind of food I eat. Those are the things that I am in control of every fucking day. Okay. Those things happen to be the foundation of creating structure and momentum in your life. All right. So my advice to anybody who's going through a hard struggle to anybody who's have a devastating loss or a big momentum change, it's the opposite

of what everybody else out there is telling you to do. Oh, it takes some time to fucking heal. No, I wouldn't take time to quote unquote heal and sit on the couch and stuff your fucking fat face with a bunch of fucking bullshit. Because by the time you wake up to what's going on, you're 50 pounds more down the wrong way. Okay. Your momentum has stopped. And in my opinion, this bad shit happens to everybody. Okay. So the best thing that you can do is to wake the fuck up, do the things that you can do to get better and realize like, fuck dude, that, that stung a little bit, but I'm going to be all right and push through. And like, dude, that's hard to do when you have, uh, you know, a tremendous fucking life altering loss, but it's also the hardest things to do are the most important things to do. And that's as far as I could tell a fact of life, you know, the hardest things that

you think are, or the thing you don't want to do most is usually the thing that will help you the most. So control what you control. Realize it's not just you. Don't be a fucking victim, all right? And use it as a test. Like, hey, lots of other people have gone through

the same situation most likely. What did they do, right? Like, I know this. I know this advice that the internet gives and that the world gives is counterproductive as fuck dude when i went to billy g's a couple weeks ago and i saw everybody there 100 pounds fucking 50 pounds overweight from what they were it woke me to fuck up most people right now are sitting on their ass bro yeah bro and you guys are building a bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger and bigger mountain that you're going to have to fucking deal with eventually. So my advice was being somebody who's built these mountains and had to overcome them over

and over and over again. It's not like I never did this, bro. I'm talking about this because this is how I used to fucking do it. Yeah. I used to follow that advice. Oh, dude, take some mental health breaks and chill. And dude, you know what happened during those breaks? I got worse.

I got fatter. I got broker. I got lazier. I developed bad habits. And that made my whole life worse. And then I had to deal with more of the shit I created because I followed the advice of some fucking weak ass motherfucker.

So my advice, control what the fuck you control, minimize the damage and fucking keep moving forward and bro that is real shit period like you could think that's harsh you could think that's emotionally insensitive or lacks empathy or whatever else these motherfuckers are telling you but i'm gonna tell you right now you follow what i just said versus following what they just said you're gonna be a better spot fuck i think i think guys you're listening pause this shit right now share this fucking show right now yeah holy fuck oh fuck i mean bro it's the truth no it's definitely people like the truth yeah yeah fuck all right question number three so and it's funny because i i had a couple of these questions and we actually talked about

this a little bit in the locker room this morning with chris what's your biggest advice to a brick and mortar business that's struggling to keep up with the big box stores and online bullshit what's your biggest advice for mom and pop who are just trying to fucking make it through right now what would you say your like quick synopsis what's the biggest piece of advice you got to them right now all right dude it's real simple okay the more technology takes over and make no mistake what's happening in society right now is designed to put small business out of business to move all the customers into digital and to really crash the local economy so that all the people who used to live and thrive

and derive their income off that local economy now become dependent on the government. The rich people, the people who are already rich are going to get a lot richer. The people who are already poor, they have no chance of getting any better under this design that they're trying to push through, which, by the way, everybody should be paying attention to this global 15% tax that Biden's been talking about on TV, because that will destroy the middle class completely. A lot of you motherfuckers think that's going to hurt people like me. It ain't going to hurt people like me. It's going to destroy the small business that does not have the margin, does not have the capability to pivot, doesn't have an extra 2 extra 2000 bucks in their bank account to make changes, which is most businesses, by the way, they will go out of

business. So you motherfuckers better get real loud about rejecting that to the point of, I wouldn't even fucking pay it if they fucking bill you for it. I refuse to pay it. But getting into what you can do to be offensive against this, understand a couple of things. The biggest thing that you can have that they, okay. So there's two kinds of people. All right. There's people who buy for convenience and then there's people who buy from people they love. All right. Amazon cannot make you love them because they're too automated. They don't have any personal touch. They don't have anybody that gives a fuck about you at Amazon. Is there anybody listening right now that thinks that anybody at Amazon gives an actual fuck about you personally at all? No, I already heard you. Yeah. So your only play is to go the complete

other way. The complete other way is this build real relationships with real people in real life. How can you do that in your small business? There's all kinds of ways. A lot of small business owners err on the side of being efficient with technology. And they believe that if they make their, if they become more like Amazon, they get more business. But let me tell you, you can't fucking compete with Amazon on Amazon's pace.

So you have to be smarter than them and play a different game. And that different game is I'm a small business owner. I care about you. And I'm going to show you how I care about you by building a real relationship and doing that in real life, shaking your hand, giving a fuck about your family, giving a fuck about your kids, giving a fuck about the products that I sell you. All right. Guess what, guys? That takes a lot of effort. It's real hard to do. Okay. But you, you ain't ever going to be the more convenient option and you're probably not going to be the

cheaper option because you lack the buying power. So your only option as a small business owner is to get aggressive about building real relationships in your community, shaking hands, kissing babies, solving real motherfucking problems. That's the only way to compete with that. And by the way, this is what we teach in Arte Syndicate. Okay. A lot of people don't know our, and my Latinized business group, Arte Syndicate. What we do in that group, it's a group that has a membership, is teach these kinds of things, these kinds of strategies.

Okay. It's not just this rah-rah motivation group. It's totally deep, in-depth, tactical fucking information on how to win in today's world by people who are actually doing this shit in real life. Okay. So, uh, I don't usually talk about my own initiatives, but a lot of people don't realize what RFA syndicate's about. Um, all, if you're not in it and you want personal develop information, um, you should be joining because that's where it's at. And we go far more in depth than what we ever did with MFCEO project you're not in it and you want personal develop information, um, you should be joining because that's where it's at. And we go far more in depth than what we ever did with MFCEO project or any

content for free. But, uh, but the point is, is that there's a million ways to do that. Uh, and that could be a whole entire fucking five hour podcast, but you have to get creative on how you connect with your people. Uh, but I really, the answer to this is an ideology change. Quit trying to compete with someone you can't fucking beat. You can't compare with. Okay. And start being your own thing. And because technology has gone so far to this, you know, you got Mark Zuckerberg saying meta and virtual reality, dude, people don't want that shit. People don't want it okay and it's not just a little people that i saw a poll it was 89 of people thought what he's doing is bad

okay people so what's that tell you as a business owner it says that 89 of the people i got customers that's right want to support small business in real life and have real america and real all these things no okay people do not want to go to this in real life and have real america and real all these things okay people do not want to go to this soulless fucking matrix world and we're not going to go there i could tell you right now we're not they are going to continue to try to force this shit it's going to continue to get rejected and it's not going to work out well for these people i'm just telling you that but um yeah so so real people, real relationships, solving real problems. Do that, you're going to fucking beat these guys.

Well, guys, that's fucking three. So go pay the fee. Yeah. So let's get it, guys. I appreciate you guys sharing the show. Like DJ said, we work this show completely on word of mouth. So if you learned something there If it made you laugh, made you think, gave you a new perspective

If it helped you If you think other people will value from it Just give us a share dude That's all we ask Alright guys I love you guys talk to you next time Fuck a stole, counted millions in the cold Bad bitch, booted swole, got her on bankroll Can't fold, that's a no, headshot, case closed