REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 180. Q&AF: Favorite Founding Fathers, Finding Contentment & Cultivating Core Values

Episode Date: November 26, 2021

In today's episode, Andy answers your questions on who his favorite founding father is in American history, when feeling content with your life is justified and how to establish your company's core values years into the business.

What is up guys, it's Andy Frisella and this is the show for the realest, say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and del delusions modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality guys today uh we have a q and af but before we get into that um i'd like to remind you that the fee for the show is very simple and yes we do have a fee um talk about the show that's the fee all right we don't run ads on the show we don't run ads on the show. We don't run ads for the show. We run, uh, this thing called a value exchange, which means if I do a good job, if we do a good job and we teach you something, we make you laugh. We make you have a different perspective. Uh, you know, makes you think, um, anything that's good content, do us a favor and share it and, and share with your like-minded friends, especially guys.

I'm getting blasted with censorship at all angles. So it's extremely important that, um, you know, seek out the people you think are going to resonate with this shit and, uh, get them on the train. Okay. Because I'm not going to stop talking about what the fuck is going on. And, uh, a lot of people are because they're weak and I'm not. So that's that. So Q and AF f what's up

what's up baby how are you i'm good man how's that fresh cut it's good yeah good i know you guys had to wait a minute but oh no no it's all good yeah it's funny so you know when we get people come in here for tours and shit right and show them the mullet right we go around and then we see the barbershop people always freak out yeah but like the barbershop huh it's pretty fucking cool though like like how many fucking headquarters you don't have fucking barbershop people always freak out yeah like the barbershop huh it's pretty fucking cool though like like how many fucking headquarters you don't have fucking barbershops in there like what was the idea behind that bro well first of all i look dude i think having a fresh haircut it is a big deal like like dude look i mean look at this shit i mean this shit is just i know you you're probably getting a little blood flow going you know what i'm saying probably all you motherfuckers guys

are all smiling and shit damn table over all right keith's looking at me funny like bro joe peeked around the side of the screen all you so so i mean first of all you know you got that yeah right right uh but dude you know a fresh haircut i don't know like it might be different for women but for a dude at least for me man makes me feel good. You know? And, uh, when I started getting serious about, uh, my mental focus and fortitude and health, um, the first time I went through 75 hard, like the amount of awareness I gained through that, uh, was massive. And one of the things that I learned in that first, you know, 75 hard, because like, dude, uh, I learned a lot that first time, um, was that I like to do things regularly, even if they're, they're not conventional to what other people do, uh, to make myself feel the

best. Yeah. And so one of the things that like makes me feel really good is having my hair, right. Yeah. And, uh, and I know it's a simple cut like dude but dude having the right fade on a shaved head is a big deal yeah i got my dude here that comes and does it kelly yeah we got sir that comes in now he's a stud and um you know bro i just i asked kelly i said hey this is back a few years ago when we were at the old hq i said hey man um could you

come in like every week instead of every two weeks? Right. And he's like, yeah. And so I wasn't the only one. You know, everybody else started getting a haircut pretty much every week. And I think it's a big deal, dude. Like, I think what you wear, how you feel about your hair, I think what you drive, all of those things for me contribute to me feeling the best that I can feel. Look good, feel good. That's what I'm saying.

It's a real thing. Like, dude, if you look back at like, uh, how Jerry Rice was, you know, Jerry Rice was an all time great NFL player.

Um, and he was kind of the man in my era, right? Like that dude was the fucking dude. And like, he had this thing that he always talked about, you know, uh,

if you look good on the field, you're going to play good. Yeah. Deon Sanders, same thing. Look good, play good. And I'm a believer and subscriber to that. So like, you know uh if you look good on the field you're gonna play good yeah deon sanders same thing look good play good and i'm a believer and subscriber to that so like you know uh so so i wanted to have a barbershop here right and uh the main motivation was you know i wanted to feel good and look good but the other thing was too um we call our barbershop harvey's here in uh at hq and people don't really understand

why you know uh back when chris and i started the first supplement superstore in springfield missouri um it was in the wedgewood shopping center next to the wedgewood shopping center there's a wedgewood barber and beauty and um there's a man who owns that his name is harvey and um you know back when chris and i didn't have shit uh like dude harvey harvey would come by you know like bro we would go we would literally go three four days with no customers you gotta understand this yeah so this harvey knew this right like he's right next door and he sees that no cars are coming to the shop you know and he understands he's a businessman so he'd come in and he'd buy you know a protein bar or

protein drink i'm 100 sure he never ate or drank any of this shit you know he would bring his vegetables from his garden just to support yeah he's just a an older guy who had been through life and understood that what we're doing was hard and he was just doing little parts to take care of us and uh you know so so when we made our barbershop here, we call the Harvey's. That's awesome. Yeah. So that's fucking awesome.

Yeah. Um, you know, and, and, and you don't like when you're in business and you've gone the hard route, uh, and you've earned your stripes,

which I'm, you know, you're going to have to, if you're going to get anywhere real in business, you're going to remember those people, right? You're going to remember those people that did you solid when you really couldn't do anything for them you know and so uh yeah so that's the story in the barbershop that's awesome so we're getting ready to renovate it already

we're gonna make it really really cool and uh i know kelly's happy because he got all the fucking tools so it's disposal it's a nice little barbershop that's nice dude it's cool that's cool so dope well guys we got three questions for andy i love that uh i just thought i wanted to bring it up but we got three questions guys as always email your questions in to ask andy at andy for seller.com um and with that being said let's go ahead and get knock these questions out so question number one out of all the founding fathers for this country who would you say your favorite founding father is and why well i posted a quote on my instagram this morning that i think reflects why george washington is my favorite

founding father and the quote is this it's gonna be hard to tax me with a musket ball up your ass and see it says it right here on the internet so it has to be true it has to be he actually said that he fucking said it. So to me, that's the ultimate quote, right? You ain't going to tax me with a musket ball up your ass because you got other shit to take care of. You got some other issues, bro. So that's my man right there.

No, I don't know, dude. Look, here's the thing. I don't have a favorite, bro. My favorite figure in American history, I have two favorite figures in American history. One is Ulysses S. Grant and the other is martin luther king yeah those two fucking guys are my american heroes yeah okay i think they they they struggled in life um they had a hard life but they both did the hard things that needed to happen for us to to embody um and work towards a unified america and i respect the fuck out of that. Yeah.

You know, and if you go do your history on either one of those men, you realize that there were two men of the same mission. Um, and it is, it's really, uh, those are my two favorite guys,

but out of the founding fathers, bro, it's more so a group of guys. Right. And, uh, you know, people have,

people say, Oh, they're fucking own slaves and shit. Yeah, bro. You can go to any fucking story of the founding of any fucking country on the motherfucking earth and the motherfuckers own slaves at some point. Okay.

And bro, that's not saying, hey, let's bring slavery back. That's saying that's a fact of history. Right. So these motherfuckers out there saying, oh, fuck these guys and this and that. No, dude. That was a sign of the times. Okay. And we have to acknowledge that

was fucking wrong but also acknowledge they did a lot of shit for us to get us to a place now we're not all literal slaves all of us no matter what color so um the thing about these guys that that founded this country which i think is so amazing is how young they all were when they did it you know right now we have young 22 year old uh men um who who are literally wearing pajamas everywhere they fucking go worrying about pronoun yeah worried about what pronoun you're fucking calling them in shock these motherfuckers were like hey fuck you we're not paying your shit right and i respect that yeah you know and and so we need more of that yeah you know what i'm saying what do you what do you think the founding fathers would be like in today's society bro like me yeah like hey fuck you yeah like these motherfucking musky balls up your ass yeah i'm serious yeah and i don't say that to fucking i don't say that to toot my own horn but the people who represent like me who are

fucking out there talking the shit that needs to be said you know what i'm saying with the right intention and moving forward together you know like that's how i see it like i see a lot of myself and the attitude they had you know i didn't do any what i've done in life doesn't compare to anything what they did those motherfuckers were tough dude they were hard motherfuckers you know and like it's not just about being hard and being the special forces these days. These motherfuckers did that shit here. They organized here. They stood up for shit here. You know what I'm saying? Like, bro, they had a, they had an idea.

Like, think about this, dude. They had a fucking idea that no one had ever fucking accomplished in the history of earth. Like, like, dude, you got to put yourself in their, their their shoes they're sitting there planning this out and they don't know there's not another example of what the fuck it looks like to even go off of so this is like creating something that never existed from a fucking idea bro that's big ass shit and people don't really think about it like that so like you know they think about it like it's real easy to criticize america and say oh it's fucking flawed here it's flawed there dude the whole idea of america is that we're always going to have issues that need to be solved yeah we're always going to have issues that we had to come together about you know and and have conversations with different

voices of different perspectives so that we could find a solution for everybody to move forward yeah so like criticizing the you know these motherfuckers were true innovators they were true fucking and they were genius yes and and dude we have to step up now yeah and fucking like revive that idea in a way that suits everybody in this fucking country you know what i'm saying same way they did yeah 100 bro but like you know we got to take the things that that we got wrong right yeah and the things that we've erred too far one way or maybe the other way or whatever and we've got to realign bro like we can't continue to allow these elite people who don't really care about me or you or anybody that believes different than me that are that are not in their little club and we like that was the thing about

this country this country was supposed to be formed as a place where the people were represented by real people you see what i'm saying like bro every other country it's elite families it's bloodlines it's empires it's dynasties and now here in in in this we have that shit forming you know because some of these motherfuckers have been here for 40 fucking years and we can't have that in america like i don't care what your opinion is i don't care what your beliefs are but you should believe in term limits you should believe in people not uh profiting from politics but more so serving in politics you know what i mean and um i raised my hand to thrive the other night and uh you know there was out of the thousand people in the room there was fucking 58 50 60 veterans probably um and i said who served in the military and those guys raised their hand and i

said all right we'll look around when the rest of you guys going to serve. You see what I'm saying? Right. Like we can't just rely on these people that go to war or go to the military to think of it like serving our country. It has to be, there has to be individual responsibility on, on, on contributing back into this, not just taking, you know, and that's

something that those men all understood. And I, I, you know, they gave up shit. They gave up, uh, you know, all kinds of things, sometimes even their lives to create this. And, and a lot of, a lot of people, uh, on the left side, you know, they say, well, they didn't think of black people and this and that. Well, you know what, dude, maybe that's the case. I don't fucking know, but I know this, the civil war happened and we were thinking about black people and this and that well you know what dude maybe that's the case i don't fucking know but i know this the civil war happened and we were thinking about black people then right i was thinking you know the civil rights happened and we think about black people then so i mean like bro a lot a lot of shit has happened since then to move us forward in the right direction and i think that we all need to get over this shit in the past bro and we need

to fucking move forward because millions and millions and millions and millions of people have fought for us to even have the opportunity that we have right now in 2021 to move forward equally you see what i'm saying yeah and people want to fuck his shit on that and they want to not look dude i said this in my story last night we have to understand that what's happening in america right now is that there's a group of people who are looking to conquer america and you guys think i'm being like over alarmist or over aggressive when i say that no you can't defeat america with a fucking like an invasion bro not not with strong united people that believe in a fucking flag but what they've done over the last 20 years is they've taken away a portion of the population's pride in that flag they've taken away and divided a portion of of of our country's love for america okay and they've they're starting

to dissolve what it means okay like these things like uh you know how like every time thanksgiving comes around now and you get these people who cry about it and say oh it's fucking this and that and this yeah or or christmas you know you can't have a christmas tree you can't say merry christmas because it's offensive like all this shit that they do bro that they plant these ideas out there that is to to to dissolve the fucking uh traditions that we have here in this country. That creates our identity. Yes. And if there's no identity, then there's nothing to fight for here.

And so you guys have to get smart, man. Like we have to do the things required. And one of those things is just being proud, patriotic people, not being afraid to fly that motherfucking flag. And if you don't like it, fuck off. That's the attitude we got to have here okay so now there's a place for you there there's a place for everybody here dude there's a place at this table for everybody yep but if you're going to be anti-american you're going to be

pro-communism you're going to fucking want to hate everything this country's about bro get the fuck out of here yep we don't need you here sometimes i'll be real bro i'm tired of hearing it yeah i'm tired of fucking hearing it fuck you go somewhere else and that's my attitude yeah this is america we have to be proud to be from here and we have to acknowledge things that aren't right and work to fix them together and that's it and if we don't do that we'll lose our motherfucking country yeah all right question number two so and i'm going to give some backstory on this because i the question up front can kind of be a little off-putting so the question is is there ever a point in in life where somebody can be content with where they are in their life so

the back point back backstory is the person who wrote this in you know my life goal was never to be a billionaire or you know right now i'm an old man i'm in good health yeah i've created jobs to be thankful happiness i've made a family is it okay to be okay with where yeah i think you should be i think that's a great place to be if you're proud of what you've done genuinely yeah and and you you aren't making things up to be proud of yeah like you know That's what a lot of people do, right? They try to be like, oh, I'm proud that I was a father. You're supposed to be a father, motherfucker. You know what I'm saying?

If you have a kid, you're not supposed to just be a biological father. You're supposed to be a fucking father. And that's what you're supposed to do. And we've lowered these standards so much that people think that doing shit that you're supposed to do as a functioning, good American human is somehow supposed to get a star. So you're supposed to do that shit above that shit. Have you done anything that you like? This man says he's created jobs. He's done this.

He's done this. He's done this. Bro, that's great. That's what we need. That's a contribution. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? And one of the conversations I always have with Jocko is like, bro, I feel like I haven't done enough. I feel like I haven't done enough for this country. My grandfather fucking died for this country. Never met him. Never even met his kid. And I feel like what I've done is not enough.

And I've shared that with him. And he's like, no, that's bullshit, bro. He's like, he died so you could do what you've done. And like, I've created all these careers and created all these benefits and helped all these people. But part, like, people are like, like, a lot of people will come to me now and they'll be like, bro, you don't have to do this shit. Why do you do it? Well, I do it because I fucking think it needs to be done. You know what i'm saying and if we all just did shit that we think need to be done regardless of what we think our fucking

payoff's going to be for it the world be a lot better place right so you know we have to start thinking about those things like for a long time bro and i could tell you this because i've been in the entrepreneurship culture for over a decade at a high level okay and uh you know up until the last couple years it was just all about what we could take and i and look dude i get it like i talked a little bit about the things i talk about back then but not i didn't feel it like i feel it now right you know what i'm saying now there's as much as a deeper fucking yeah yeah for sure yeah way way more like like way more obligation way more uh well i think the image is clearer too right like yeah yeah i've seen more yeah yeah yeah that's a great point

yeah dude i i think for sure man like dude look look man i think it's important that we test ourselves consistently i think no matter how old you are you need to figure out little ways to test yourself every day keep you sharp and keep you fulfilled and keep you moving forward but yeah bro like that's yes there's a yes yes you should feel good about the problem with this is and i said this at uh at the rta summit you know the motherfuckers who actually take what i say seriously are the ones that are actually doing shit and they like look at themselves like fuck i'm not doing enough and and the lazy motherfuckers that aren't doing shit they hear what i say and be like oh he's not talking to me exactly no i'm talking to you so like it doesn't surprise me

that that question comes through or questions like it yeah um but yeah man take an actual inventory like what have you done and if you haven't done anything yet do some shit right you know be of service figure out how to fucking make your community better how to make people better how to you know like there's all kinds of ways to do that in our little in our little worlds of in our communities bro and that's really what we're missing here yeah you know we're missing leaders in our communities yeah so it doesn't matter what age you are you could do that right you could do that just by the way you live you know so yeah for sure bro you you know i listen i get that kind of question written to me uh and asked

of me a lot for people who who like feel like they're not doing enough dude if you're a fucking driven individual you're never going to feel like you're doing enough it's just part of what you are yeah and you know so so how do you how do you how do you exist when you have this drive inside that always going to feel like you didn't do enough you know what i'm saying yeah so you have to like consciously like talk yourself you know i have to remind myself of the shit that i do because i don't value the shit that i've done i value the shit that i'm going to do you know what i'm saying yeah and so um where i think most humans like they they value the one or two or three things they might have done good and they ride their entire lives on those things and i don't eat fuck bro i'm gonna tell you like half of the shit i've done i don't even remember like people come and tell me that might be a good thing

though yeah no no i mean like the good shit Like, people come and tell me. That might be a good thing, though. Yeah. No, I mean, like, the good shit. Yeah. Like, people come to me and they be like, dude, remember when you did? I'm like, fuck, I forgot about that. Yeah. Because I don't focus on it. Right.

You know? Right. That's awesome. Yeah. All right. Third and final question. So, here, in every business that you run, right, you have these core values, right?

And I think every business is a little bit different as far as what those core values are as they should right um and you've always talked about how important it is to have those core values set early in the beginning stages of that company okay well i don't know i don't really ever say that i say you have an advantage for that yeah but like i didn't set my core values. So I was 11 years in. Okay. Well, perfect fucking question.

So how do you, how do you establish and implement those core values in a company that's already going? That's 11 years in versus then get started. Yeah. Like, how did that go? Yeah.

Well, you, you, here's what you do. Sit down with your three or four trusted people. First of all, I sit down by yourself and I'd say, what do you think your company is? And I identify six to 10 core values that you think your company is about and their

little phrases or words, right? And then you write a little definition for those things and how they apply to your company. And then you go and you present them to your team and you say, I would pick you guys here. Let's just say we got 30, 40 people. Right. Yeah. And you guys are the, my main people. I say, Hey, look, I'm going to, we're going to make these core values. I want you to look at these and tell me what you like and what you don't like. And, and are we missing any and what could be added and what should be removed and make a fucking meeting about it so that these people who are key to your company

can have buy-in and they can have contribution. All right. Because then what happens is those five or six people that you included on the conversation to create this direction of which way you're going to take your company are now bought in because they contributed to it. So now you have a group of what? We have six people in this room that go out to the, what I say, 50, 30, 40. We go out to the, what I say, 50, 30, 40. We go right to the next 30 or the next 40 out there. And we said, this is what the fuck we're doing.

Okay. And I meet with you guys. I said, this is how we're going to implement it. We're going to, we're going to put this out. And what I did was I had a dinner, um, with all my employees and all their significant others. Uh, and we, and we, we had a core values dinner and award banquet and um you know at each person's table there was a uh there was a uh uh like a note card

like a like a i don't know like eight by four fucking i don't know i don't know whatever the fucking size it was yeah okay size of a dinner plate yeah it sat there typically they're seven by five okay seven by five see this is what i pay for bro like i don't need to know that shit you know what i'm saying all right so seven by five stock listen yeah it's on card stock two sides one side had half the core values the other side had the other half and and then i got up there and I talked to the whole, everybody about what we're going to do and where we're going and why these went through every single core value. Um, you know, and then I gave out awards based on those core values to people who I thought represented them.

And, and, uh, and then we had a party and we got fucked up. Yeah. Yeah. For real. And after that, we were off to the races. Yeah. And, uh, and then, um, you know, the main thing, dude, look, this is a nine, ten hour, this is probably a fucking three day course. I'm trying to condense in a few minutes.

Yeah. And this is why I don't talk about this that much, because it's really a workshop. You know what I'm saying? But, uh, you know, I could tell you the biggest things that you need to keep in mind when it comes to your culture is you don't want it to be one of those signs that hangs in the locker room. Like you did at your college football, right? That says,

fuck and play like a champion today. And everybody looks at it and it doesn't mean shit to nobody. Like, so how do you really, what's important is how do you make it mean something to your people? And that is the hard part so you can introduce and say this is what we're about but then the hard part is living those things and you have to genuinely live them i have to live our core values like i cannot be fucking caught

slipping on our core values and i remember you i'm sorry not to cut you off when we first got started when i first got started with you you told you had the same conversation with me yeah because you're like hey you can't be fucking slipping because you're a fucking reflection of me yeah i remember that conversation as fuck yeah and now we got you in line now you're looking for areas to improve yeah you know i'll give you fair shit you weren't sloppy but you weren't up to our standard no for sure okay for sure and uh and now now because they're not normal yeah and no it's well it should be it should be yeah it should be but they're definitely not fucking normal standards compared to i forget they aren't yeah like dude like when we went in the bathroom at that thrive conference and it was fucking shit

everywhere yeah and i i even do what i do i started wiping down the counter what i do though you fucking caught everybody remember what i said there's like 30 people in the bathroom you're like fuck i'm in there and they're all looking at me because they know i gotta they know who i am i gotta speak and i go yeah i go pretty fucking weird that you guys all come to a a con a con a convention to get better and the bathroom fucking looks like this and guess what i walked the fuck right out yeah it's fucking true yeah you guys spent all this money on these motherfucking conferences and you can't even fucking you're gonna leave a bathroom looks like that yeah that's your problem it ain't the fucking conferences gonna fix it it's gonna be what you did and like bro people people are they think the little shit doesn't matter bro the little

shit is all that matters it's all that fucking matters yeah you know so i don't know what we're talking about i'll just implement these core values yeah it was there though no no for sure yeah so that's the answer to that. Gotcha. Follow real quick on that though. Would you, would that, does that change as an employee, right? That wants to like this, their employee works at a company that does not have core values. How did, how should they go about?

Develop your own fucking core values as a person and live by them. Develop your own little core values just like you would a company. Yeah. This is what I fucking stand for. This is what I do. This is how I behave. And then audit your behavior against the core values just like you would a company yeah this is what i fucking stand for this is what i do this is how i behave and then audit your behavior against the core values people think that like having the core values that means you're going to automatically do all these things 100 of the time you're not you're going to find yourself off track you're going to find your company off track you're going to find your people off track and learning how to

communicate well first off audit behavior and then communicate to yourself or to the team that you're off track and use these as a guiding set of values that that bring you back in line to where you should be is how you're supposed to use it it's a tool yeah right so and that's what creates the persona of a brand the the the the feeling that people get about your company that they can't really describe you know like you come here there's a fucking feeling to it yeah you know i'm saying you go in certain places that have a right their right culture and they're on point and they're intentional there's a fucking feeling there yeah there's a feeling you know i'm saying like there's a feeling when you walk into a harley davidson retail store yep there's a feeling when you go into a lululemon you see what i'm saying

there's a fucking feeling and the feeling is driven by this culture that's created by your core values and how well you audit your team and yourself against them consistently yeah so awesome well guys that's fucking three so go pay pay the fee. Yeah, do it.