REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 269. Q&AF: Successful Comparisons, Installing Core Values & Being Silenced

Episode Date: April 5, 2022

In today's episode, Andy answers your questions on the misconception that success happens overnight, when is it an appropriate time to install core values into your company, and if he's worried about being silenced by the elite establishment.

What is up guys, it's Andy Priscilla and this is the show for the realest, say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society. And welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today we have Q and AF. This is where you answer the Qs and I give the AFs. Wait. This is where you ask the Qs. Okay. All right.

You know what the fucking show's about. What's up, DJ? What's going on, man? What's going on? Yeah, we got some good ones. Where do we submit the questions? All right, guys. As always, email your questions in to ask andy to andy for seller.com okay

this is our main personal development platform right now the q and a f so this is your chance to sort of get some mfceo style answers if you don't know what mfceo is i can't even explain it to you because it's so fucking special you'd make a tear right in my eye um i like i like q and a's man they're awesome yeah they're cool uh they're really cool when they're q and a f's though yeah that's true yeah all right so the fee for the show the show is uh not free all right now it's free from a monetary standpoint but what i do ask is that if we make you laugh we make you think if we give you some info if we teach you some shit um that you show the show for us. All right. Very simple. We work on the honor system. And I know nobody has more honor than my listeners. All right. So what's what we got?

Let's dive into it, brother. We got some good ones for you. Andy, question number one. I'm 18 years old. Okay. How do I deal with personal happiness and fulfillment and not feeling depressed or worthless when I see all of these celebrities and ultra successful people and they're extremely well known, but they're all in their twenties, you know, people like Logan Paul or Dan Bills, uh, those areas to name a few, I feel like we can't all be this celebrity superstar that lives these crazy lifestyles. So how do I handle that? Well, first of all, listen, Dan Bilzerian's 40 years old. It's true. You know, the Paul brothers, you know, a lot of people look at those guys and they say, oh, they're young and they're successful and they're killing it, which are all true.

But they've been at it since they were 10, 12 years old. Right. Okay. Right. So these guys are smart guys. They understand social. They're great marketers. They're great businessmen.

They're smart guys. And they put in their time. And that's really the answer to the question. The answer to the question is how much time have you put in? How many years have you put in? Because I know Jake Paul personally. I know him pretty good. He's put at least a dozen years into his craft

to become what he is, okay? And most of it's documented on YouTube. So I wouldn't let it, first of all, I wouldn't, a lot of people will say, oh, that's just all bullshit. It's not all bullshit. There's a lot of people that live really well, okay? But what you'll find behind every single one of those people is a long journey

of how they got there all right um especially these younger guys now are there situations where you know somebody comes up in the rap scene or in the in the social media scene or makes a splash at a very young age uh and makes a whole bunch of money and becomes famous absolutely dude there's all kinds of those situations. But what you have to realize is that ain't you. It ain't ever going to be you. It's not your current situation. Now, if you want to dedicate the next five, 10 years to becoming that way, cool too.

And the results will be there. All right. They will. But those things are not not that's not happiness and fulfillment bro at all you know those things are cool like um like having my garage i have a world class garage dude like i not just the garage but like what's in the garage all right i walk through it every day and every day i walk through it it gets less and less impressive just like when you get your new jordans and they're cool as fuck and a week later they're cool but they're not as

cool as the day you got them right and then a month later it's just a pair of shoes success is the same thing so what you have to do is you have to understand that fulfillment happiness are not related to the material life that you live they're related to what you do internally and what you do day by day by day by day. Okay. And part of being fulfilled and happy has to do with how controlled you are in your life. And the reason most people have no fulfillment and no happiness in their life isn't because they lack material things. It's because they lack the discipline to be in control of their life. All right. Which means if you don't have the discipline and you can't control what direction you are because you can't adhere to any system possible,

meaning if you follow a diet, it doesn't matter what diet, but if certain parts of the diet, like calorie restriction or drinking water and working out you are eventually going to lose weight it's a mathematical equation so you but you have to learn to adhere to that first right which that's where the discipline comes in um and when you live an undisciplined life it leads to confusion it leads to hopelessness it leads to uh thinking that your life that you are a victim of circumstance all because you never worked to develop the skill of discipline. So when you become a disciplined person and you understand that you control your food, your water, what you put in your brain, and all these things, then it becomes clear that you're actually in control of a lot more things. And once you realize that, which, dude, this is a very important point. 99.9% of the people who have walked on the face of this fucking earth never, ever, ever learned this lesson their whole lives.

They never learned it. They never learned how to cultivate discipline. They never learned how to exercise discipline. They never learned that they're actually in control of their life. Instead, they went through their entire life as, you know, the plastic bag floating through the air like just where the wind took them yeah and then they end their life saying fuck i i didn't do anything because they didn't right and what you have to understand at a young age is that the more discipline that you become the more fulfillment you'll create and the happier you'll be yeah and

it has nothing to do with material things until it does right right that's just a portion of your life like a big portion of my life was building that car collection and building that garage and building this and that and this and it was cool as fuck it was definitely worth doing i love it and it inspires a whole lot of people and it's not that it's boring to me i still but it's just like, it's like the shoes, okay? It really is like that. Right. It's cool, but it's not everything. Would you say that's the same for like the social media influence, likes, the comments,

the shares? Yes, people get addicted to the validation and they think that's where they get their fulfillment or their approval from and that makes them feel good for a minute. But really what happens is it ends up making them feel really bad. Right. And that's why they feel so empty because at the end of the day, you're just a dancing bear. Like you do the tricks and the likes come, right? Right.

This is one of the reasons I stopped posting on social, bro. I don't fuck with social media anymore personally because like, dude, it becomes a very slippery slope that even intelligent, aware people can fall into. And I don't derive my value from your, no offense to you guys listening, but I could really give a fuck less if you like me or not. I, it's true. And you know, that's true. Okay. But that's what makes me, me and where I get my happiness and fulfillment from is me exercising on my own personal skills of discipline and then using the discipline in my life to control the direction I need to go. Okay. Um, when you combine that with a, with a, with the idea of gratitude, all right, now you're in a scenario where it's almost impossible to be unfulfilled or unhappy because when you're disciplined and you're in control and you're also grateful for everything

that you fucking have, it is literally impossible to feel bad. It's impossible because you're directing the ship and you know this, right. Right. And then also you're grateful for the opportunities to be able to direct the ship. Like once you truly cultivate the idea of discipline as a skill for you and it really sinks in, this is why I talk about 75 hearts so much. Once you truly realize that you become free, dude, you become completely free. It's no longer the world controls me or this controls me or that controls me. It's you imposing your will on the world. And the coolest thing about life is realizing, holy shit, I have the power to actually take

myself anywhere I want to go. Right? Yeah. So, you know, most people go their whole lives without ever realizing that. And this person is 18 years old. Whoever you are listening, you have the opportunity right now to develop that skill set, which your parents probably don't have. The people you're friends with probably don't have.

And fucking probably some of the people you look up to don't have. And if you develop it now, I can promise you in 10 years, bro, you'll have everything you want and you'll still realize that that's not what makes you happy what makes you happy is the ability to get whatever you want it's fucking real man that's real andy question number two for you does that make sense no it makes perfect sense too yeah i mean another thing too on that like i'm like as i meet more of your friends right the the you know your circle and your people that are very very successful you learn to realize that there's a lot of sacrifices that are made yeah that people don't see they never see it you know i'm saying like yeah you see this shit on instagram right you see the yacht party or the fucking cars or you know this or that or this

that's like one percent of your life like less than 1%. That is like one snapshot out of one day and one second. And bro, the fucking yacht they're on could have sank the next minute. You don't even fucking know. Exactly. So like you have to be really aware of how you attach your value to other people. And I think it's worth noting. A lot of people talk about comparison being the thief of joy, right? That's a famous quote.

And it is right like when you're doing really good and you compare yourself to somebody who's much bigger than you you're not going to feel as good about what you did right but it's also important to realize that you really aren't doing that much and then you have a lot more to do so you have to walk that line balance yes of understanding truly where you are and appreciating what you have but also understanding that we have a long way to go and those two things can live uh in perfect harmony regardless of what anybody else may tell you people will tell you it's you just be happy with what you are other people will tell you you ain't shit you got to do all this shit right i'm one of them okay um but the truth is it's both okay you guys listening to this show you're all you you guys are already in the top one percent of

fucking humans on the planet like you have a phone you have a computer you probably have a place to sleep you probably got some food you're not starving like bro compared to the rest of the world that's wealthy right okay so you're already in a good spot be thankful for that and then let's make a target develop the skills to get to that target and move towards that target and you you will develop happiness and fulfillment along the way i love it man i love it andy number two, when did you and Chris, uh, implement your core value system, uh, in S2? Was it, was it from day one? No. Can you talk a little bit about that? Yeah. So, uh, the first 10 years in business, uh, I had never really understood what core values were. Um was 10 years yeah our 2011 was when we put

them in so just understand that like a lot of people think oh dude i didn't put them in and it's been four years how the fuck do i do it right you just gotta do it bro um we we uh we decided like you know we started realizing that we needed direct shoot and uh we had a party and we invited everybody who are this is how we put them in okay we invited all the employees and their significant others uh we were just kids dude you know i'm saying like in business i was 30 years old 29 years old um what was i i was 31 i had a little bit figured out yeah yeah i was i i had made a little bit of money um just a very little bit i invested a lot of money over the years back in the company and

we were doing some business and i'm like okay well now we got to get real about building a team so i started looking into how to do this shit and like for me uh core values were always like a sign in the locker room at your football wherever you play football right or sports like like notre dame has that sign play like a champion today yeah and all the dudes tap it when they go out on the field right and like it doesn't really mean shit but they just you just see it in your like in your high school right yeah now it might mean something notre dame probably does that's probably why they've been great for so many years but at most schools and at my high school they had a bunch of shit on the walls that meant nothing. And the reason it meant nothing was because none of the coaches

communicated in that language. None of the coaches stressed those things. They were just signs. They were just words. It didn't mean shit. All right. And what I realized was for us to have a direction moving forward, we had to come up with a set of values that were going to guide the business because I won't always be there, you know, to guide the decision-making process. Um, you know, because like, like right now, here we are, uh, a couple, you know, a decade later, we've got hundreds and hundreds of people. How am I going to direct the decision-making of hundreds and hundreds of people? If I can't talk to hundreds and hundreds of people, what am I going to do? Get on a loud speaker or follow them around all day.

Right. Like I, so I started coming to this realization that if we were ever going to build a real company, they had to have a direction of what we stood for. Um, and one of the companies that inspired me to do this was a company, uh,

called tap out. And that was a apparel company back in the day, the company. Um, and I, i i i was very inspired by how they did things and um i started looking into the idea of intentionally building a culture i came across a bunch of different companies that had done that and basically i i created a set of values we had a dinner i invited everybody it was called a core values and leadership dinner which we now is our core values and leadership banquet right uh where it's like you guys see

me up there in a tux and there's it's like the it's like the fucking hollywood award show right yeah um it's really badass without will smith yeah yeah will smith gets ass knocked out you come up there and talk to me like that i'm just saying fucking ollie ain't got shit on me all right so fucking uh the point is like you, now it's turned into this amazing thing. And people are like, even last night. It's an awesome event. Yeah. Yeah.

Even last night I was posting pictures of our company meeting and people were like, dude, how do you like how? Yeah. Right. Well, that's how. Okay. You have to develop a set of values that you live and breathe, hire and fire and operate and make decisions based upon. And you have to communicate in those values.

And that is the quickest way that I can explain how to install culture. And I didn't say create culture. I didn't say fucking maybe get culture. I said a very specific word intentionally. I said get culture. I said a very specific word intentionally. I said install culture. Okay. No matter where your business is, no matter what it is you do, no matter who it is you are, no matter what you think your skills are, no matter how, how boisterous or how meek you may be, you need a set of core values and you need to communicate in those values and you need to make decisions on those values. You need to make corrections in those values. And if you're planning on building

a real company, otherwise it will always be a small business. It will be a mom and pop regular place where you're having to deal with all these individuals, individual personalities, um, who, you know, may have a core set of beliefs. Uh, you know, Susie over here might have her own set of beliefs. Right. And, uh, Don over here might have his own set of beliefs uh you know suzy over here might have her own set of beliefs right and uh don over here might have his own set of beliefs and they're clashing in the office right and that creates friction to getting to the goal and there you are micromanaging this is no different than what this dude building a company is no different than a fucking team it's a sports team it's the same fucking shit it's exactly the same that's why so many great sports people come out and become

great business owners because they understand this simple concept of installing a culture so without getting into how to do that uh because it would take me like 10 hours uh if you want to know more about that you should join our taste syndicate or apply to join because that's how we we we start with that and then we move beyond that. So we actually design, help you design your own system inside. But, you know, for the biggest thing that I hear from people when it comes to creating core values and a mission statement and moving their company forward as a team is they understand to create all that, right? But then they don't communicate or correct in that language.

And for example, maybe they just become words on the wall. Yes. And, and so like, you know, there's going to be situations in your company where people do fucked up shit and you have to look at your core value list and you say, okay,

well, which ones did this person violate? Sometimes it's one, sometimes it's fucking all right. Um, and you make decisions accordingly based upon that. And, and that's how you have to run your business.

It sounds complicated, but it's actually pretty simple. But you have to be diligent about it every single day. And that's another problem that people have. A lot of people understand what I'm saying, and they understand how to do it. And I've taught a lot of people how to do it, and they just don't do it. Like, if you don't teach yourself and do the work yourself to communicate and actually live those values the best that you can because here those values are you have to understand your employees are going to violate those values over and over and over and over again yeah the idea is that those values are there to

guide you and when you make mistakes we correct to get back on course with those values. Does that make sense? No, it makes perfect sense. Right. So, so like, it's not a, it's not so rigid, like, oh, this person violated this. So they're fired. Right. It's, it's a more of a learning situation, right?

A learning moment where it's like, okay, what, what, what do you think? What'd you do? Okay. You did this and this and this, what core values did that violate? And then you tell me, oh, well, I didn't take initiative. I didn't take responsibility. I could have went the extra mile, but I fucking got lazy. Okay. And then you make them tell you which ones they violate. You have a conversation about it and say, okay, now next time, what are you going to do? And you know, most people people and that's the other thing most people want to win most people want to be better most people want to contribute um but they're afraid to because they're afraid if they make a mistake you're going to just fucking get rid of them that's it and

that's a poor business decision in itself because if you just get rid of people when they fuck up they you're going to deal with the same fuck up over and over and over again because the people that you're bringing in haven't learned that lesson. And I see a lot of CEOs that are heavy handed with firing that they can't get anywhere because of that. So there's a lot to it. We get very in depth in this in Arte Syndicate. If you're interested in this kind of stuff, this is the big picture kind of stuff that we really help people define in that group. It's fucking awesome. I could do a podcast that would be 10 hours long on that.

Just so, just so. No, no, I mean, yeah. I get it. Andy, our third and final question for you. Andy, are you worried at all about being silenced by the elites in the establishment? No.

Not really. I mean, about being silenced by the elites in the establishment no not really i mean dude they're what the fuck they're gonna do yeah you know what i'm saying oh you're gonna take my fucking business i've been broke before you're gonna take my fucking this or that i've been alone before you're gonna take my fucking property i lived in I've been alone before. You going to take my fucking property? I lived in a shithole before. I ain't scared, dude. They can't fuck with me. They can fuck with me, but it'll never get me to be quiet. It just won't because it's not who I am. I'm authentic to who I am.

If I see wrong, I'm going to call it out. And I don't care if it costs me everything. It's just who the fuck I am. And at some point in your life, you'll realize that staying true to who the fuck you are is the most valuable thing. And the only thing that you'll ever have ever, ever, ever, ever, because money comes and goes, success comes and goes, fucking houses come and go. People come and go, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Knowing that you did the best that you could to, to, to make things right matters when you look in the mirror and that's all I give a fuck about.

And so, no, I'm not afraid. Um, I'm not afraid of any of them and you shouldn't be either because the collective fear that they put through the fact that this question is even answered is the exact reason why we are in the world is the way it is right now because they have intimidated people so much

that they are afraid to speak. And they started this with political correctness. Political correctness is the actual weapon. The reason I say it's a weapon and the reason it is a weapon is because what it's designed to do is it's designed to make topics taboo. It's designed to make things off limits. Can't tell tell that joke you can't say that somebody will be offended it'll hurt their feelings you can't do this and even and now it's gotten to the point and if you do those things you're shamed right you're you're a bad person or you're one of the ists right a misogynist a fucking racist of whatever is right whatever the ist is that they decide to call you.

It's not even true. It's not true. They just don't like what you have to say. And truth is extremely important. I don't believe it's ever been more important than it is now in the history of mankind because I believe that we are at a turning point in society where we can either go and be totally technologically enslaved or we can be completely free. And we have an opportunity. And I see the opportunity for humanity to be free in the first time in history ever. And the political correct weapon that they've installed into society over the course of the last 25 years has worked. It has gotten people to be quiet. It has gotten patriotic people to feel ashamed for being patriotic. Like it's not socially acceptable. Motherfucker fly to your

motherfucking American flag, run down your street, motherfucker, honk your horns at you. They'll cheer for you. They'll love you, but they don't want you to know that. And they want you to be too afraid to actually do that so that they can get what they want and they can take what you have. And until you understand that, and until you get over the fear of being silenced and over the fear of being shamed and over the fear of any of this shit, they are going to win. They're going to fucking win if we don't all get over that. Okay. And that's one of the reasons I do this show. It's one of the reasons I don't hold anything back because I look to be an example for you guys to tell what you believe the truth to be. All right. Does it, does it, does it fucking hurt me sometimes? No, it's actually only helped me.

It's blown my fucking businesses up. All of them. People support me just because I'm me, because I'm, I'm able to voice the truth. Have people tried to fuck with me? Yeah, they have. There's been some people that try to fuck with me, but guess what? I'm still here voice the truth. Have people tried to fuck with me? Yeah, they have. There's been some people that tried to fuck with me. But guess what? I'm still here. And they ain't. So, you know, and I realize that a lot of you guys aren't in my position. And that also makes me speak up more.

Right. Because I am in this position. And if I don't speak up for the people who are afraid to speak up, then who the fuck will? Right. So, no, I'm not afraid. They can all fuck off and eat shit and that's how i feel about it they're scummy people they they've they've stolen from us for for decades and decades and decades they've impoverished our families they've fucking made us sick they made us fat

they've encouraged us to be lesser humans than we could be made us hate each other they made us they've they've divided us They've created false realities in actual reality. Okay. I hate these people and they hate me too. And I'm fine with that. I'm fine with being hated. And once you become okay with being hated, it really ain't a big deal. It just isn't. Oh, you don't like me? Cool. I'll go over here. I don't give a fuck or you could go away dude it's sticks and stones will break my bones you know what i'm saying so fucking love it yeah they can fucking eat shit and uh i wish you guys would join me in my uh my vocalness um i wish you would i wish you would stand up to people in real life when they try to bully you. I wish you would call out the bullshit in real life when people try to impose their bullshit will on you. And if you did,

I could promise you things would change very quickly. And all I'm doing is I'm here waiting for you all to join me. So let's go. Andy, guys, that is three. So go pay the fee. Yep. If you liked the show, if it made you laugh, if it taught you something, if it gave you a new perspective, please share the show. Thanks, guys. Yeah. Went from sleeping on the floor Now my jewelry box froze Fuck a bowl, fuck a stove

Counted millions in the cold Bad bitch, booted swole Got her on bankroll Can't fold, that's a no Headshot, case closed