REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 473. Q&AF: Proactively Looking For Holes In Your Boat, Embracing The Suck & Measuring Success

Episode Date: February 14, 2023

In today's episode, Andy answers your questions on how to proactively look for holes in your boat and patch them before they sink your ship, what's the best way to embrace the suck when pursuing your goals, and how someone should truly measure their success.

What is up guys, it's Andy Purcell and this is the show for the realest. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society and welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today we have Q and AF. This is where you get to submit your questions and I answer them. You can submit your questions a couple different ways. The best way to submit them is to... Guys, email those questions in to askandy at andyfusella.com.

And the other best way, probably the second best way. If that was the first best way, there has to be a second best way. The second best way is to drop them in the comments. If you're watching the show on YouTube, for those of you who don't know, we are uploading full episodes on YouTube now. I know we're audio heavy. We've been doing it for close to a decade on audio. But for those of you that want to check us out on YouTube, we are uploading those full episodes there. And we have a couple cool YouTube exclusive projects. So you're going to want to go subscribe to that either way um but yeah submit your questions there we'll pull them out we'll answer them on the show that's what this show is about it's mainly personal development how to win in life how to win in business uh this is an entrepreneur focused podcast for the most part

traditionally it has been uh with a little taste of uh event flavor. And that brings us to our next episode selection, which is CTI. You'll hear us in CS post CTI. CTI stands for cruise the internet. And that's kind of where we cover what's going on in the news. We talk about it. We throw some headlines up on the screen. We make some jokes. We talk about what's true, what may not be true and try to help navigate through the plethora of bullshit that we live in called society right now. And it's definitely not politically correct. So if you're expecting that, it's not something you want to listen to. Other times we have real talk. Real talk is five to 20 minutes of me just giving you guys some real talk. And then we have full length. And

full length is what you guys are used to in most podcasts where it's a few people sitting around having a conversation. And for all the value that we may or may not bring you, we do ask that you abide by the rule of value exchange. Now you'll notice that I don't read ads on the show. I don't run ads on the show. I don't take money from companies so that they can leverage what I say or what I don't say. I try to keep it super authentic.

And I try to share with you guys my business knowledge that I've learned thus far after 24 years of being pretty fucking successful in business. And I'm saying that, I'm not saying it to brag. I'm saying it because it's a fact. I try to share these things with you guys. And I ask very simply that if what we talk about helps you, please share the show. If it makes you laugh, please share the show. If it helps you see through the bullshit of what's going on in society, please share the show. If you think people need to hear it, please share the show. And we call that the fee. So when we say, hey,

pay the fee, that's what we're talking about. Just very simple value exchange. If we did good, share it. If we didn't do good and you didn't like the show don't feel obligated to share the show i'm totally cool with that too so what's up man hey what's going on brother dude so i was uh i went to the mall sunday and i walked through jc penny okay did you have to shoot anybody this time no not this time so people don't know that story where you almost had to shoot that dude at the fucking mall dude dj yeah got same mall though yeah dj got caught up in the middle of a literal shootout at our mall here in st louis about what two years ago yeah yeah yeah about two years ago right actually right around this time yeah he didn't get to shoot anybody

yeah not yet yeah but he was bobbing and weaving i was right there yeah but no i was walking around i was in jc penny and i don't i mean i had no reason in there um but i'm walking through and then i saw denying that you shot by jc penny i think everybody i think everybody denies okay that's fair enough it's fair it's like it's like admitting you like nickelback no it's like it's like it's like admitting you like riding on a moped like everybody likes i've never rode on yeah but see everybody has fun on the moped. Like everybody likes. I've never rode on a moped. Yeah, but see, everybody has fun on a moped, but nobody wants to be seen riding it. It's like a segue. Yeah. There's a saying, you know, from us old folks.

Yeah. Roll the decks. Yeah. You know, that riding a moped is kind of like riding a fat girl. Is that the same? Yeah. It's super fun, but you don't want your friends to see you riding it. Hey, and if you're into that that's cool too i'm just saying that's what i've never heard that i didn't make it up hey it is what it is the rules yeah but also i was i was going around in jc penny

and i found uh uh this clearance section right and one of the core values here at first form is always be learning um and i saw this item and then i saw the clearance sticker on i said there's no fucking way i can pass this up i got a guitar i saw that an acoustic guitar i bought one i was going to tell you if you wanted to start learning guitar we should do that together because i want to pick back up i'm well i'll say this 2013 i'm two days in yeah your fucking fingers hurt don't they bro i think i have arthritis yeah where are you learning so i use this uh there's like this app that uh it's called like simply guitar something like that it's actually very cores and stuff yeah it's like it's very intuitive because like it listens while you're playing and make sure you're playing the right notes and shit um but dude that shit is fucking hard oh bro that's i i recommend

so i didn't start playing guitar till i was 30 years old yeah and and by the way i'm no good so don't ask me to play shit i'm not doing it i took lessons for five years and then i i set it down and i haven't really picked it up too much since um because it's like starting over it's a lot like golf like you could like i played golf earlier in life i got to be pretty decent i would i'm not good but i would shoot you know a mid high 80 legit no foot wedges no cheating yeah and that's pretty good for a fucking, just a hobby golf, right? But then I stopped and I went back like five years later, bro. It was like, I never picked up a club.

I went to a lesson the first time and I'm like, nah, I'm not starting. I fucking said golf's not for me. My thing is, so I like, I don't know if you guys know, but I play piano, right? And I'm self-taught on piano. I never took any formal classes. I've been playing for like 12 years now. But because I'm self-taught, there's a lot of terrible fucking bad habits that i've learned where like a person that's actually trained in piano will look like what the fuck are you doing but it works right i don't want to do that with guitar like i want to learn it like the right way yeah so that's why i'm trying to do this process and apparently it says

that 10 minutes a day for 30 days you can become pretty fucking good is what like i can play a fucking bar mitzvah and shit is what they're saying i can attest that that's total bullshit this is total i need to get my money back yeah guitar is a is a i think it's something that every single person should attempt to learn. Because here's what I picked up out of learning to play guitar at a very, very low functioning level. Is that now I can watch people who are good at guitar and appreciate how fucking awesome they are like yeah and if you don't have that perspective of trying like like dude like like it's like these fucking fat middle-aged fucking dudes who sucked at high

school sports who criticized tom brady for something he did on the fucking field why did you throw the ball yeah like dude you guys are so fucking out of touch with like the reality of how hard what you're observing is that you can't even appreciate it yeah and so that's what i that was the biggest thing i gained from from taking those guitar lessons and if i never picked up a guitar again it gave me a perspective to appreciate music in such a different way that like i appreciate now yeah right like when i see somebody like dude when we were uh hanging with uh when matt and uh and jerry from black rifle and they were at the house so my i have a uh a guitar acoustic guitar sitting on a stand

um in my little lounge where we smoke cigars right and um that's going to become an ongoing joke what kind of cigars do you smoke the fucking green ones you're right right so so dude so we're sitting there and uh i think matt picked it up didn't he or was it yeah no jt picked it up first jt picked it up anyway they went back and forth and bro they're fucking great yeah and it and like just sitting there watching these two dudes who i you know respect from their business and what they've done and they're also friends of mine. And then seeing them have that skill set on top of that, it's just such a cool thing to know how to do. For sure.

And I don't know. I kind of want to pick it back up and start getting back good again. But, dude, I want to hire an instructor that will come to my fucking house two or three nights a week and fucking sit with me for a couple hours and but like dude you know how hard it is to get people to commit to that like these musicians don't they don't care if you how much you pay them either yeah no like they're like they're like in a different fucking world it's a whole different bracket yeah like i got this dude you know him joe uh my old guitar instructor who was one of the most incredible musicians ever, bro. Um,

this dude, his name is Matthew. Fucking great dude. Learned a lot about not only guitar, but also just life. Um, and I haven't talked to him in a couple of years, but I guarantee if I did,

it would be totally fucking normal. But Joe worked with them too. Uh, who Joe produces a show. And, uh, well, you got,

you got like a platinum record or something don't you yeah a couple platinum records and that's real shit too yeah real shit it's not like we're not so so you know joe knows a few things about music and we both agree this dude's one of the most incredible guys musically that we've ever met and dude this was crazy so like i'd sit with him and you know the songs i wanted to learn were either like, like, uh, they were mostly country songs, which are easy to learn. Interesting. Like they're strum songs.

Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. Well, cause you could sing to them. That's why I like. Yeah. And, uh, that's what you should be learning too. Cause you like to sing.

Mm-hmm. But, um, and you're good at it, but, uh, the, the, uh, his ability, like, dude, I remember we were looking at Jamie Johnson songs, and we were going through these different Jamie Johnson songs. Jamie Johnson, if you don't know, is my favorite artist. Okay? So, like, out of all the genres, out of all the music, out of all the everything, Michael Jackson, fucking everything, I think Jamie Johnson, if you don't understand

jamie johnson's music or never heard of it you should look into it but he's my number one guy like you guys all think chris stapleton is fucking cool yeah chris stapleton is just copying jamie johnson no shit oh yeah and and no offense to chris he's fucking good too but like i'm just saying jamie johnson's one of the most influential people ever on the in the country music scene yeah and so he's never heard of him matthew's never heard of him and and a lot of people haven't because he's known mainly as a songwriter not as a actual musician uh dude was a marine his whole story is incredible i'd love to have him on the show sometime but um anyhow dude i could play this he'd be like he'd

like so what song do you want to learn because he would make you learn songs right like that you want to learn and i'd say well i want to learn you know uh this song and he's like well i never heard that let's play it so we go on fucking itunes we play the song this motherfucker could play the song back after listening to the song one time oh shit he could play the song back after listening to it one time and he could play a whole three or four minute song complete without missing a fucking note bro that's crazy yeah that's the level so so that's the level like now now i used to be like fuck that's an incredible talent and he'd be like that ain't a talent dude he's like i've been playing since i was 14 and

when i was going or eight or whatever it was, he was probably in his fifties whenever I was going to him. So I mean, this guy's old. Yeah. He's older, but he'd been playing his whole life. And he, and it's funny because it's a, it's a lesson that I remember. He taught me two valuable lessons. One, he used to always say, Andy, you're not very patient. You need, you need to be more patient. Do you know how you get, you know how you get more patient? And I'd be like, no. He'd be like, by doing things that require patience.

That was the number one thing that he fucking taught me. And then the number two thing that he taught me, um, was that when you guys observe people who have been doing something their entire life and you call it a talent, you're actually insulting them because you're discounting the amount of work that they've put in to get to that level. When people come to me and they, you know, young entrepreneurs come and they say, God, dude, you're so good at what you do. You're so talented at what you do. I've, you know, this, that, the other, you guys should realize that this is a time thing. This is, this is not a talent. Like it's a skillset that you, that you go through by executing day after day, after day,

after day. And dude, if I had, and what he taught me, which I don't believe, but he said it's true. You know, if I had been playing guitar for 40 fucking years like he had i'd be able to replay a song too but i don't believe that i think he's super talented as well yeah but the point was he used the time together to teach me these lessons that stuck yeah you know and improve my life man yeah 100 the patience thing was a huge deal you know and that's what i'm learning well that's what led me that's what led me to the understanding of the discipline thing that we talk about with 75 hard and live hard, you know, to, to cultivate discipline, you have to be disciplined to cultivate grit. You have to be gritty to cultivate perseverance. Guess what? You got to persevere. And so all

these things that we admire in other people that they have are very easy for us to gain not easy simple for us to gain if we understand that the way to get the thing is to do the thing right you know absolutely i learned that from him absolutely that's fucking yeah but you know what i offer to pay him like five times his regular rate he still won't come to my fucking house oh he's making you what he wants you to come to him yeah he wants you to know it's just it's his time his bro he lives his life it does it's it's not about money it's not about this it's not about that now i think if he actually did come to my house and we sat in my garage he'd probably come back you know it's kind of like that you know just a tip once and you're hooked you know he'd

come back just one cigar that's right right anyway well yeah man yeah so i'll keep you guys updated how it's going we should fucking i'm down with it yeah i'm down with that bro but i'll tell you this like so bro we practiced for a year or two we'd be out doing shows fuck yeah andy and dj show we could we could fucking do we could do a whole tour we could do real af live and then the intermission too joe you can put a beat behind it that's what i'm talking about yeah i mean the patience thing is a big one because like i only paid 40 bucks for the guitar yeah it's like it's a great fucking deal yeah but i almost fucking smashed 40 bucks the other night oh yeah learn out bro yeah patience is a thing so but yeah let's fucking do it man i'm down

i'm down well it is q a so it's time for for other people learning some skills all right cool um any question number one most people don't know that there are any holes in their boat until it's already taken on water do you have any tips for proactively looking for these holes before they become massive fucking craters do you have any tips on that well first of all again like we talk about a lot on the show, you know, the fact that you're aware that you need to look for these things puts you way ahead of most people. Here's the thing that I, you have to be proactive. Okay.

Meaning you have to actively look and anticipate, not react to what happens. Reactive leaders and reactive entrepreneurs and reactive business people always lose. They always lose. And this is why from the outside, people who are proactive appear to be obsessed. It's not that they're obsessed. It's that they're proactive. And so when you've built something or you've got some momentum or you built a small business and you're trying to grow it into a medium-sized business or whatever it is you're working on and you are proactively looking for things that could trip you up, you're actually being what should be considered a real entrepreneur, okay? Reactive people are not entrepreneurs and unfortunately, most people are reactive.

And this is why most people, you know, they wait until the relationship is over before they try hard, right? They come home, their girlfriend says, you know, you didn't take me on these trips or we didn't do these things. We didn't spend this time together. And you said you were gonna, and you know what? I'm just, I'm leaving. And all of a sudden the dude's sending flowers, he's booking this, he's doing that. And what this actually comes down to is a concept that i call selective urgency okay and this means that you believe and most people do believe that they can choose the things that they want to be urgent about and the rest of the shit doesn't matter but here's what happens when you think like that what ends up happening when you think like that is that your boat that has holes, because bro, your boat has holes. My boat has holes. Everybody out here

has holes in their boat, even if they want to pretend like they don't. And so when you have selective urgency and you say, well, you know, I'm going to look over here and pretend these things don't, these things aren't really that big of a deal. Well, then before you know it, you've got so much water in the boat that you can't save the boat. And this is a concept that all of you guys need to really understand, whether it be business, whether it be your life, whether it be relationships, in any regard. Because the truth of the matter is, most of us intuitively know where the holes are, but not many people really want to look because they understand that it's uncomfortable to look at the holes and fix them. But I can promise you that if you became proactive and you started to have urgency in all areas of your life, your life will drastically improve because you're going to

have confidence and belief that those holes are handled. So now you're not getting surprised and blindsided. You don't have to worry about these things that might happen to you because you're aware. All right. And then you are actively seeking these problems out to fix. So what it actually does is it brings you more peace because you know you're handling your business. So what do you say to people? Because I feel like a natural inclination for a lot of people like, well, shit. Okay. I see that hole there. I see water's coming on. I'm just going to focus on my fucking strengths. I'm going to go super hard on my strengths because they're so uncomfortable about handling that.

How should those people get out of that mindset? Well, you have to realize that in the people who say focus on your strengths and you don't need to worry about your weaknesses, that's not an accurate statement. It's not reality because what will happen is you will get really strong over here in this one area, but this weak part, this part that keeps on taking on water will end up pulling you back. It'll act as if, uh, you're running full speed with a parachute on all the time. So while you don't need to dwell on your weaknesses, you do need to pay them enough

attention to where you can handle them to where they don't become a hindrance to the process or the journey that you're on. Yeah. I love it it any uh question number two um you've said before that you got it sometimes you just got to do the hard shit right what have you found to be the best way i guess to quote unquote embrace the suck like i mean do you embrace it or like is it the suck and you know it's the suck how do you how do you look at that how do how do i how do i personally look at it um i enjoy the things that are extremely difficult because i know that people that are competing with me won't do them oh yeah so when when i like, for example, like when, when I go out, a lot of you guys watch me and you see me out, you know, doing the live hard program when it's fucking minus 27 degrees,

like it was a month ago. Um, and you're like, why the fuck is this guy doing this? Well, the reason I'm doing it is because I'm training myself to do things. Like I know for a fucking fact that not a single one of my peers that owns a company out there that I'm doing it is because I'm training myself to do things. Like I know for a fucking fact that not a single one of my peers that owns a company out there that I'm competing with, or even in a personal development space, people I'm fucking like, you know, my peers. Now I'm not going to say they're competitors because I like these people, but I also take pride in being a little bit harder than what they are and so i while it may sound stupid to you this is a way for me to prove to myself that i'm willing to do shit that they're not willing to do

and so when i pick up my phone and i'm out in full fucking you know cold gear trying to do my shit and i pick up my phone i see everybody else like playing fucking golf drinking hot right or fucking chilling on the fucking beach or whatever it is they fucking do. I take a lot of pride in that. I'm like, yep. See,

I'm winning. They're probably losing right now at this minute, I'm winning. They're losing. So like, I like that. I like that feeling. And it gives me confidence to,

uh, into my own abilities and my own ability to persevere and do things that are difficult. And so that's how I, how I frame it in my mind to embrace the hard things. Like when you can remember that, cause like, dude, here, this is a reality that most people are uncomfortable accepting, but it's true. You are in a competition. Like you, you may say to yourself, I don't compete with anybody. I only compete with myself. And like, we see this meme all over the place, right? Like the only person that you compete with is the version of yourself yesterday. And while that may be true, that is how you should look at it.

It's a great way to look at it, sure. Yes, because how you're going to beat your external competition is by doing that, okay? But here's what you have to realize about that. That doesn't mean the external competition is make-believe or fake or it doesn't exist. And so a lot of people like to opt out of competition by saying, I'm not competing with you, but you fucking are. And that's the reality. And so when you understand that that's reality, especially if you're in business, bro, you have competitors. These people might... Bro, I'm friends with most of the people i compete with

like most of the dudes that run other companies that are that are my size or bigger and even a little bit smaller i'm friends with all those guys but guess what i still want to beat them yeah and they want to beat me and when they when they do beat me because sometimes they do you know what i say dude that's good i could do that i could do that better you see what I say? Fuck dude, that's good. I can do that. I can do that better. You see what I'm saying? So you allow these little micro competitions in your own brain to drive your progress forward. And a lot of people do themselves a disservice because they don't feel comfortable saying that they're competing with people and that they want to win. But the reality is, is like, that's the way the world works. You could deny it all you want. Just like you could deny gravity. We could argue about gravity, bro. You could say it's fucking fake. You could deny it all you want, just like you could deny gravity. We could argue about gravity, bro. You could say it's fucking fake.

You could say it's bullshit. You could say it's made up. But if we go stand on the top of the building, we're going to see how much you actually believe that shit, right? Because if you step off the side, you know what's going to happen. You're going to hit the fucking ground. Gravity going to kick your ass. And this is no different than when people deny competition.

Like, dude, every human being has a competitive nature ingrained in them and then over the course of time through schooling through uh indoctrination through propaganda that especially recently the last 20 years you know through participation trophies telling people they're special when they fucking are just like everybody else and all this shit we have weeded out the competitive nature of humans by the time they're 20 years old now when they were fucking two they had competitive nature in them and here's the proof give a kid a nerf set of a nerf set of basketball you know the little nerf sets for the babies kitty hoop okay Or give them a fucking one of those blocks

with the round peg and the fucking square, the square block and watch them get it in the hole. What do they do when they get them in the fucking hole, bro? They celebrate.

Automatically. It's in them. Your daughter does it. When she does something that she knows is good, she fucking gets excited. That we're all born with that. We're all born

with the competitiveness inside of us and then it's weeded out by society. You know, when we first grow up, when we're, you know, under the age of, you know, let's say eight, we are taught, oh, you could be anything. You could be anything. You could be a doctor. You could be a lawyer. You could be a president. You could be anything. Right. But as time goes, by the time you're a senior in high school they're telling you like they told me that you're a fucking idiot and that dude you should just you know relegate your dreams to being a regular person time to be realistic yeah that's right

and so that shit is weeded out of us you know like when when i when i was a senior in high school i was you know i've told the story a number of times but it's relevant i was told you know they said well what do you want to do i told him where i wanted to go what i wanted to do and i was and the response was andy you're not cream of the crop man that's a that's that's a path for people that are cream of the crop and that just ain't who the you are and it was that's i remember that burned in my brain like it was yesterday i'm glad it was said to me because i used it as fuel but i'm just saying as an example that's the that example, over the course of 17 years, that's the progression of humanity. And so people come out of school where they should be prepared

for actual competition. They come out thinking that competition is immoral, that it's wrong, that it doesn't exist, or that you can opt out of it. And the truth is you cannot opt out of it. Competition is real and it's real in your job. It's real in your life. It's real in your relationship. Okay. How many of you motherfuckers lost a fucking partner in your relationship to somebody else? That was better.

Yeah. Yeah. We're living in a competitive world. This is the truth. This is the reality. And so when you deny that as reality, you're setting yourself up for a lifetime of fucking beatings. So it's better to embrace it.

It's better to understand that, yes, the way I am going to beat my competition is by being better than I was yesterday. But the external competition is a real thing and it does exist. And I have to be better than that or I'm going to fucking lose in all of these areas. Andy, third and final question. Andy, I had a mentor once tell me to never use money as a measurement of how successful you are because you can always look around and find someone else has more. So how do you or how should someone truly measure their success? Well, first of all, math doesn't lie. Okay. So if you look in your bank account and has a whole bunch of fucking money in it,

or you look around your life and there's a bunch of things that cost a whole bunch of fucking money, you're doing something right. Okay. So let's not fucking act like this is the, you know, politically correct. And let's not shit on fucking money. You know, a lot of these coaches out here like to pretend like money doesn't matter and this and that. Bro, they're fucking full of shit. Money matters a lot and it matters a fuck ton more than you actually think it does. You see all these broke people all over the internet saying the same shit, right? Money doesn't make you happy. It's lonely at the top. See what happens whenever people become successful, they become evil or this or that or this. Notice that you don't see anybody with significant financial status saying any of that shit.

It's always the same motherfuckers. It's either people who are totally broke or it's fucking coaches that haven't actually built anything that are trying to sound idealistic to appeal to people who are also broke. So they can make money. Yes. So that's a fucking lie. Yeah. Okay.

Now, with that being said, does that mean it's the only thing? Absolutely not. There are multiple spectrums of success in your life. There is your fitness. Are you a fat fuck? Are you actually fucking fit and healthy? Are you taking care of yourself? There's your mental health.

Are you disciplined? Are you hardened? Are you taking care of yourself? There's your mental health. Are you disciplined? Are you hardened? Are you ready for the battle that is life? Or are you soft as fuck and quit at everything that you try to do? That's most people. Most people can't finish things. That's their whole problem. That's why 75 hearts,

such a valuable program. Shameless plug. Can you have a shameless plug for some shit? That's free though. It was fucking free. You should fucking do it. Anyway, then you have your relationship. What's your relationship look like? Right. You know, okay. Is your relationship fucking shit show? Is it drama or is it actually, uh, you know, do you contribute to each other? Are you pushing each other for forward? Are you there for each other? Are you building together? There's all these different

areas. There's personal fulfillment. Are you fulfilled? Because you can have a lot of money and not be very fulfilled, right? So anybody who says they have the ultimate way to measure success, bro, these people are just like you. Don't misunderstand this, okay? And I'm not saying this to brag. I'm saying this as a matter of fact, I'm more financially successful than 99.9999% of these fucking coaches out there. Period. I've done it. I built real shit.

And if you ask them, they'll fucking tell you the truth. They'll tell you that. Not a single one of them and me included actually know what success the right way to measure it is. We don't fucking know. I'm still trying to figure it out myself. Okay. And my point in saying that last statement is not to brag. It's to show you that you can be really far down the road and still be trying to figure this out. Now, how I judge success is how committed I am to pulling the potential out of myself and how good of a job am I doing at fulfilling my own true potential. People ask me all the time, what is success to you?

Success to me is the commitment to the pursuit of your own true potential. It's self-actualization. Here's the thing with that the reason I think that's the definition of true success is because you never get to a point where you're actually successful and when you commit to understanding that you never actually realize your own true potential but you pursue it anyway in the name of progression you are committing to a very noble life. Okay.

And here's why it's noble. It's not noble because you have a bunch of money. It's not noble because you got some cars. It's not noble because you built a company. It's noble because when you show people what it looks like to progress through the course of life, constantly evolving, constantly growing, constantly improving. You are inspiring people to do the same. And this is a big issue that we have across the world. We have a world full of people who are told to love themselves and accept themselves and just be who the fuck you are. And people interpret that as that it's okay to be this way lesser this much lesser version of your own self and bro there's

nothing noble about that they're settling you were fucking born with that shit bro you haven't done shit and this is why on the inside when those people talk about self-love and they talk about they're fulfilled and they're happy i know for a fact they're full of shit i know for a fact they're full of shit and if you ever a fact they're full of shit. And if you ever get them quiet and you get them in a private area and you get talking to them and you say, hey man, are you fulfilled? Are you happy? They'll say, yeah. Well, are you really? Are you really, man? Like explain to me what you think that means. How are you fulfilled? They can't explain it. They can't explain it. And the reason they can't explain it is because they're just parroting some shit. They're hearing from some idealistic predator, which is what it

is. A lot of these idealistic people on the internet are predators. And the reason they're predators is because they convince people to somehow pay them for shit or buy their books or whatever, but that they should just stay where the fuck they are. And the reason this strategy makes people money is because people are perfectly comfortable not doing any work. All right. So we have to understand that when you commit to the self-actualization process, when you commit to the development of your own true potential, you have to understand that as you go through the process and as you make mistakes and as you develop new skills, your potential expands on the back end, which means your potential is not a static point. It's a sliding scale. And what does that mean? That means no matter how much fucking work you do,

no matter how much you give, no matter how much fucking personal development you put in, no matter how much you grow, you will never actually reach your own true potential. And if you understand that and you still commit to that because you understand what it's going to create for not only for yourself, but for other people, I think that's a very noble way to look at success because other people will be inspired to also continue to grow, to also evolve, to also grow. What if everybody in the world stayed exactly where they are when they're fucking 18 19 20 years old which is what society's trying to cultivate they want yeah they're trying to cultivate this they're trying to cultivate a society of people who don't want to work people

who have no ambition people who are not competitive people who are not smart people who have no desire to get better and instead indulge on all the creature comforts that they have created for us. Netflix, fucking streaming services, fucking ice cream on demand, Domino's pizza in seven minutes. Like, bro, they're creating customers by creating over consumers by denying people what is actually the essence of life, which is growth. You see what I'm saying? So that's why we have so much depression. That's why we have so much anxiety. That's why we have so much, uh, mental illness in society is because these people, and by no fault of their own bro, most parents don't teach their kids about this shit. Okay.

So like your fucking dad, their dad, everybody's dad, like they don't, they don't teach them that shit. Very few parents. And by the way, parents, you should be doing this. Okay. But then you throw in the teachers on top of it. You throw in teachers who have never actually done anything. Okay. Now I'm not saying all teachers, there's some great fucking teachers out there. Okay. But there's a lot that don't give a fuck that are there because they get three months off a year and they don't give a shit about your development or creating or pushing you down the path to actual success. So, you know, when you hear people, uh, very hard line to find success of, it's not about this. It's about this,

or it's definitely not about that, bro. These people don't know what the fuck they're talking about. And any, any single one of them, you put them on my show and I'll fucking expose you. I'll expose them right in front of your face. They don't know what the fuck they're talking about for free.

I will. I'm just saying that they came on my show. I could get them in fucking less than five minutes. I would expose that. They actually don't know. You know, you know how, you know why they don't know?

Cause nobody knows. Nobody fucking knows. Like I'd be a liar if I sat up here and said, that's the way, that's just the way I interpret it. That's the way I see it. There's a million other ways to see it. That's how I see it. That was the question, wasn't it? Yeah. Okay. So that's the way i see it there's a million other ways to see it that's how i see it that was the question wasn't it yeah okay so that's my definition if you don't agree with it

you want to be a fat slob your whole life and do that shit i don't fucking name my life bro it's your life yeah i'm just telling you when i committed to that process my life got a lot better in all areas i got better in every single fucking area. Love it. Yeah. Well, guys, drop down in the comments what you guys think your definition of success is if you're on YouTube. Let us know that. But, man, you guys, that was three. Yeah.

I'll pay the fee. Yeah. Went from sleeping on the floor. Now my jewelry box froze. Fuck a bowl. Fuck a stove. Counted millions in a cold. Bad bitch.

Booty swole. Got her on bankroll. Can't fold. Just a no-hit shot, case closed