REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 650. Q&AF: Leading Team Meetings, Winning In Life & Having "Fun" At Work

Episode Date: February 15, 2024

On today's episode, Andy answers your questions on the best way to improve your public speaking skills while leading team meetings, what happens if you put in a lot of work towards your goals and you still fail, and what is the best way to get your team back on track after having a 'fun' team event.

What is up guys, it's Andy Fristella and this is the show for the realest say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness and del delusions of modern society. And welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today we have a special midweek edition of Q&AF. All right? That's where you submit the questions and we give you the answers. Now, you could submit your questions a couple different ways. The first way is... Guys, email those questions in to askandy at andyfrasella.com.

Or you go on YouTube on the Q&A episodes, which typically are on Mondays, but sometimes we throw them out here in the middle of the week as of late. You drop your question in the comment section. We'll pick some from there as well. We'll answer it right here on the show. Now, if this is your first time listening,

we do have multiple formats of the show. We like to say shows within the show. All right? Sometimes we have Q&A. That's what you're going to get today other times you have cti that stands for cruise the internet that's where we talk about what's going on in the world we throw some headlines up on the screen we speculate on what's true and what's not true and then we talk about how we the people need to solve these

problems going on in the world other times we have real talk real talk just 5 to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk some things i think you need to hear and then we have real talk. Real talk is just five to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk, some things I think you need to hear. And then we have 75 hard verses. And that's where somebody who has completed the 75 hard program comes on the show, talks about how they were before, how they are now, how the 75 hard program has helped them get their shit together and how it can for you as well too. If you're unfamiliar with 75 Hard, it is the initial phase of the Live Hard program. It is available for free at episode 208 on the audio feeds. It is not on YouTube. We just started YouTube about a year ago. So that episode is only on audio and you get the whole program there for free. 75 Hard is not a challenge. It is not a trend. It is not some internet bullshit. It is the world's

most popular in history mental recalibration program that will help you figure out how to get your life online and on track. There is a book about this. There's actually two books. There's a book called 75 hard and then there's a book called the book on mental toughness. I would buy the book on mental toughness, but it includes the entire 75 hard book then there's a book called the book on mental toughness i would buy the book on mental toughness but it includes the entire 75 hard book on the inside plus uh the following phases of live hard and also 10 plus chapters on mental toughness and case studies on some real world examples about how they use mental toughness to build incredible lives. These are people that you guys have heard of. So get the program for free, episode 208. You can buy the book at andyfersella.com. It's called The Book on Mental Toughness. It's not required, but it's a great book and I know you'll love it. So other than that, you'll notice we don't run ads on the show. I don't take money from people

that are going to tell me what I can and can't say on the show. The show is called Real AF. It's not called Listen to These Sponsors AF. I don't give a fuck what they say or what they think. And so I don't take their money. And I ask very simply in return for that, that you support us, buy my shit and share the show. We have this thing called pay the fee. And the fee is very simple. By the way, I pass on eight figures a year on advertising, just so we're clear. This is not like a little money. It's a lot of money that I pass on. So you guys supporting me in return really means a lot to us. What I ask in return is very simple. Just please share the show. Okay. We get throttled, we get traffic censored, shadow ban, whatever you want to call it, especially when we do our CTI episodes across the internet. So the message doesn't get out unless you guys share it. And you guys

normally do a pretty good job of doing this, but there's a lot of you guys that listen and don't participate in this part of the show. You consume, you consume, you consume, and you don't share. And that's not the deal we have here. So the deal is, if it makes you think, if it makes you laugh, if it's good information, if it's something that you think people need to hear, please share the show, all right? Don't be a hoe.

Share the show. All right. What's up? Will you be mine? Oh, yeah. It's Valentine's Day. It's also, more importantly, Madat's 30th birthday.

Happy birthday, bro. Thank you. What are you going to do for your birthday? Jiu-Jitsu. Jiu-Jitsu. What were you going to say, DJ? Roll around with a bunch of dudes.

On his 30th birthday. On his 30th birthday. Hey, man. Winners get better. They don't give a shit if it's their birthdayth birthday. On his 30th birthday. Hey, man, winners get better. They don't give a shit if it's their birthday or not. No. I like it. Happy birthday, bro.

Thank you. Thank you. Yeah, that's a big deal. What? What are you laughing at? You jealous? You don't get to roll around with dudes. No, no, no.

That's what it is. He's just hating, bro, because he wishes it was him. How many birthdays is this in America now? 28. Is it like more than half? Like more than? 28. Oh, shit.

I didn't know you were here that long. What? Okay, do the show, man. Holy shit. No, man. Happy birthday, Medat. Love you, bro. What's up with you, man?

What's going on with you? We've been busy. Yeah. We're getting a lot of shit done. Yeah. A lot of projects coming to fruition here shortly. Yeah. Yeah.

Got a... What's up the sleeve? What's up the sleeve there besides those guns? Yeah, tune into the show for terrible jokes. That's what we're going to start advertising. We're the antithesis of comedy here. Okay, we tell all the shitty jokes. That was a good one.

Oh, it was. That was a good one. We'll let the people decide. Yeah. Yeah, man, look, just been busy, man. Building companies, doing things. You know, building out First Form into the next great American iconic brand

with the support of these wonderful people that listen to the show. Doing a whole bunch of other stuff that we've got going on. We might have a new podcast launching soon called the MSCO Project. You might have heard of it. Only been trying to relaunch this for a year and a half, but we got that coming down the pipe. I think that's something that's important to talk about though. I mean, people, you know, when you talk about launching something, especially something that is going to provide as much value as it is, that shit takes time, man.

Like you want to make sure that it's right, you know, and just jumping into things. That's not your, that's not how you do it. It's important you guys understand this podcast will not be on iTunes. It will be on a private server. So keep an eye out for my stories on Instagram. Keep an eye out for what we got going on the show because it's not just going to launch on this YouTube channel or this feed.

It's going to be kept on a whole new feed, and you'll understand why when I explain it to you. But we got that coming down the pipe. That's exciting. Yeah, man, energy drinks rolling out good, picking up accounts every day. Things are going well. People love it. Off to a good year. Yeah, it's been good, man. Off to a good good. Picking up accounts every day. Things are going well. People love it.

Off to a good year. Yeah. It's been good, man. Off to a good start. It's been good so far. Yeah, man. Just got to keep moving. Well, let's keep making people better. Yeah.

Let me take a little sip there. You guys who are interested in the MFCEO project, seriously make sure because I'm not going to announce it in public. It's going to be through my email list. I was about to say, is it going to, like, Yeah, so if you're not registered to my email list, if you don't get Andygrams, like, if you don't go, you should go to my website, go to the Andygram, register on that list,

and you'll get the email about when it launches. Yeah. So, make sure you guys do that. Yeah, that's what we're doing. Andygram is like,

like, a lot of people are like, well, dude, you should get back to posting again. Well, yeah,

dude, I do post every single day. That's what you forget. I post every single day on my Andyigram. It comes to your email directly to your email. All right. And the reason I did that is because I get fucked with almost more than anybody on the internet. And quite honestly, I was scared they're going to delete my entire account, my whole following, and I wouldn't have shit. So I started that

specifically so that I could keep in contact with you if they deleted my shit. So I took my post from Instagram. I put them into an email list and a blog four years ago, and we've been doing it that way. So the Enneagrams are fire. Yeah, well, people should subscribe. If you guys want to read my shit and what I write and what I think, that's a great way to get it. Plus, we always stay in contact no matter what these guys on social media do to us. So if you're not registered there and you're not on that list, you're not going to know when the new podcast launches because that's where it's going to get launched at through my email.

I love it, man. Sweet. Well, let's get some people better here, man. I got three good ones for you. Cool. Guys, Andy, question number one. Hey, Andy, I have recently been promoted to assistant manager in my workplace. This is coming with a few more responsibilities, including holding monthly meetings with our small group of employees. I'm struggling with these meetings.

I tend to freeze up and just completely forget all I had planned. I'm lucky to have a manager that is working with me and helped me through the first meeting. I want to succeed in this role and eventually move into a sales position. What advice do you have to get better speaking to groups? Reps, man, it's reps. Okay. Nobody's born with this skill of holding a great meeting or being a great speaker or going up there and just, you know, delivering a message in the way that it needs to be delivered from the get-go. That's not a real thing. I've never seen anybody be able to do that ever. Now, are some people a little bit better naturally than others?

Sure, but usually that what we perceive to be better has more to do with them not being a self-conscious and just going up and doing the job as opposed to people who overthink and get paralyzed by the pressure of delivering a meeting or public speaking. So this is a very important skill for you guys to develop. If you do not develop how to hold a meeting or how to public speak, you are going to be very limited in your income producing capabilities. That's reality. All right. So when it comes down to having a meeting and you're just

getting started realize that we all start there all right when I started giving meetings you have to realize the first six years of our business it was like me and Chris and then some friends who kind of filled in just to help us run the first store in the second store and then we went from one store to six stores because we bought out this failing business and took over a bunch of stores at once so we went from one store to six stores within 30 days so we went from not having to have any meetings to having to manage a whole bunch of people and i had no idea how to do that because i had never done that before like real employees yes yeah there it

wasn't just me and chris and three of our friends from the bar that helped us run these two stores anymore now it's there's 15 20 people that are we have to coordinate to to do what we're trying to do and I had no experience with that so I can remember sitting in those meetings and standing up and legit holding my piece of paper and it like shaking because I was so nervous. And that went on for years. That went on for probably from 2006 to 2010. So for about four years, bro, every single meeting I gave, I was nervous. It came out weird. I knew I always messed it up. But after every single one of those meetings, I gave myself an honest assessment. I said, all right, how'd you do? Well, I delivered this point good. I delivered this point good. I missed on this point and this point. I really got too nervous here. I don't know why. And I give myself some honest coaching. And also this is

translates to sales interactions as well. If you actually take the time to break down your sales interactions in an honest way, you'll be able to coach yourself into being a productive salesperson. But we're talking about speaking. So I would break down my speaking play by play over and over and over. And every single time I did a meeting, I would do that. And we had meetings every single week. So for four years, that's roughly what? You know, if we have 52 meetings a year times four it's 208 meetings so you have 208 meetings that i put under my belt yeah all right that it took me to get the jitters out right and and here's the thing though you know a lot of you guys know me as a speaker right i get paid a whole lot of money to go speak in front of a lot of people to deliver a message. And that's where that skill came from. That skill came from that scared dude who was

scared to have a meeting in front of 10 or 12 people, 15 people to someone who can go out on stage in front of 25,000 people and blow their fucking minds. And that's the power of reps. I don't have a natural skillset for this. In fact, when I took public speaking in college, I got a D, all right? And by me doing these meetings and then working the sales floor of a retail spot and then doing the podcast on top of it, it gave me thousands and thousands and thousands and thousands of reps that allowed me to learn how to speak in a way that resonated with people. And so to all of you guys out here who look at all these people, you know, there's a lot of people who pretend

like they have this natural skill and they were born with this. And the reason they do this is because their ego is overinflated and they want you to like worship them and think they're special. But the truth of the matter is none of these people are special. Not a single one. I fucking know all of them. I know them all. All the people you think are big deal on the internet. I fucking know them. Every single one of them. I fucking know them. And I'm telling you right now, the ones who try to pretend like they've got it all figured out, they're fucking lying because I also know they're bullshit behind closed doors. Okay. This is hard for everybody. Everybody starts in a very difficult spot when it comes to public speaking and communicating to a group. That's a hard skill to learn. Actually, I take that back. It's not that hard to learn. You just have to be willing

to be bad at it for a certain amount of time. And then it starts to get better and better and better. So my answer to you is to understand that you're supposed to be bad right now. You just started. You give him one meeting, bro. You're not going to come in and blow people's fucking brains off. You know what I'm saying? Like you're going to suck. Yeah, it's not going to happen.

That will come with time, though. That will come with time. You're going to give a meeting, a meeting, a meeting, and you're going to do hundreds of meetings and hundreds of reps. And eventually you're going to get on like a little roll in your meeting. And at the end of it, people are just going to look at you and they're going to start clapping. And you're going to be like, what? And that's how it starts.

You just start to get better and better and better with reps. So understand, one, you're supposed to be bad. Two, the only way to get better is to be willing to go down the path and look stupid, which is what most people aren't willing to do. Most people spend their entire lives afraid to even start because they are concerned about what people might think. They tell themselves all these stories. They're going to get laughed at. They're going to get made fun of.

People are going to talk shit. And guess what? They're going to talk shit either way. They're going to talk shit if you go and try and look stupid and fall on your face, or they're going to talk shit if you don't try and you become just a fucking loser. All right. So people are going to talk. They're going to laugh. They're going to give you shit. This is a natural part of life. And they're going to do it whether you go down the path or whether you don't. And so you have to ask yourself, do you want to go through all that humiliation and then have something to show for it? Or do you want to go through all that humiliation and then have something to show for it? Or do you want to go through all that humiliation and actually be what they say you are,

which is a loser? All right. Those are what your choices are. So you're doing a great job by getting started, brother. Keep going, show up every time, try to get better, break down your coaching and just get yourself in situations where you can give the reps. This is why I tell you guys do that exercise of going into public places and having real conversations with people. I tell this, I've told, if you guys, it's your first time listening, I'll tell this story again. I used to play this game where I would go to the local grocery store right up the street from my house. It's called Deerberg's here in St. Louis. And I would go in there and I would force myself to have three conversations with someone

before I left. All right. And this isn't like, Hey man, nice shoes. This would be like a conversation, right? Like, Hey, have you tried those beans before? Yeah. What do you make with them? Well, have a real conversation, right?

Because what that does is it starts to get you in a skillset to be able to communicate face to face. And a lot of you guys that listen to this shit, you suck at this. All right. The biggest problem with the younger generation right now is that they have an extremely difficult time communicating, not on their phone. They don't want to talk to people. They don't want to meet people. They want to text people and that's it. And that's a severe handicap on your success because the reality of building something real in life comes down to how well you work with other people because it takes a fucking village to be successful. So if you lack the ability to actually connect and communicate with real life human beings, you are at a severe disadvantage. And that also opens up the flip side of that equation. If you are a young person and you are willing to get good at this skill and you are willing to invest the time to be great and you are willing to put in the effort to develop this skill set, you are at a disproportionate advantage over everybody else because most of these people are tied to their phone.

When I was 20 years old, everybody talked to everybody because we didn't have fucking phones so think about competing with everybody who's got great people skills and working to have people skills versus you young guys you only have to compete with a small amount of people because they're believing this lie that connecting with humans is really irrelevant because we can just do everything through technology motherfucker technology don't buy your shit people do and if you don't connect with them you're going to be fucking broke so keep putting in the reps put in the practice put in the time get yourself in intentional situations to have to talk to people and that skill set will grow it's like any other skill i love it i don't want to miss this point because it's something you said and made me think you know we talk about how you after you got done

with the meeting you would check yourself like you would go over play by play right yeah what do i do after i after i talk now you still do that to this day and was that what you were going to bring up yeah that's why i want to bring up because i feel like you know people what do i say when i get in the car after a speaking event man what do you guys think i don't know man and you start like you start really being i up this part exactly i could have done better this part yeah this is where i and even though everybody else think you did amazing yeah you're just i'm talking it out on my own. Yeah. What is that?

That's called self-assessment. That's a skill that most people lack. Most people either tell themselves that they were really great or they tell themselves they were really shitty. And you have to learn to coach yourself from a unemotional, factual standpoint. Did you execute? Did you not execute? Did you do good? Did you not do good? If you did good not execute did you do good did you not do good

if you did good tell yourself you did good here if you did bad tell yourself you did bad here we as humans have this natural propensity to beat ourselves up even when we do good or when we do bad tell ourselves that we did amazing and these these lies that we tell ourselves because we are protecting our own ego are actually what can stop us from becoming what it is we're supposed to become. So it's very important to learn the skill set of self-assessment, to detach your ego and say, all right. one of the reasons our show does so well with the current event stuff is because i and you both are willing to say man am i right about that or am i wrong am i seeing that wrong you know what i'm saying for sure so like we have to just sucks we're always right well hey it is what it is but i'm just saying you know we have to this this flows into a bigger conversation which is what have we lost in

society we've lost the ability to disagree and communicate or find common ground and the reason that we've lost the ability to communicate and find common ground is because our egos get in the way of it because we either want to be right as much as as much as we could possibly want it we want to win the argument winning thening the argument is not the goal. Solving the problem is the goal. Winning the idea contest in your office, like I want to, you know, my idea has got to be the one that we do. No, your idea should be the best idea. That should be the one that we do. And this not, our lack of ability to separate ourselves from the truth. And what we want the truth to be is what's damaging our own personal development and our ability as a society to work together.

So we have to fucking be able to assess ourselves in a very honest way with as little bias as possible. Clearly, we're going to have bias. If you're having a great day and you think you're awesome, you're probably going to tell yourself you did a little better than what you did. If you're having a bad day and you're feeling like shit, you're probably going to tell yourself you did a little worse than what you did. So we have to be aware of those things too. It's a skill set to be able to assess yourself honestly that has to be developed through reps,

just like the actual delivery of the message. I love that, man. I love that. Guys, Andy, question number two. Andy, I'm 23 years old. I didn't have the best examples of success growing up, and I never really knew what success looked like.

I want to win in life. I want to have financial freedom. I want a badass house and a bank account. I want a legacy. Now, I've been listening to your show for about six or seven months now, and I feel like I understand and get everything you're saying and it still doesn't work what happens if i still fail this fear is paralyzing me to even start and i can't shake it well first of all um i think this is a great question because i believe that the reason that most people never start is because they can't pinpoint the desired result as a certainty. All right. They want to consume all the data. They want to consume all the action steps.

They want to make sure of every single thing that they can before they start so they can get this guaranteed result. But when they realize that the result cannot be guaranteed, no matter if you do all the work, then they say, well, fuck it. I might as well not do the work because the result's guaranteed. But what they're failing to realize is the flip side of that. You do have a guaranteed result if you don't go. The guaranteed result if you don't go is that your life is going to be shitty. All right. And you're going to think every single day while you're alive, man, what will my life look like had I done those things?

So it's not what's going to happen if I do it. It's what's going to happen if I don't do it. And if you don't do it, your life is not going to stay the same as it is now. It's going to get progressively worse because we live in a sliding scale when we talk about culture and society and the way things progress. And so if you're not getting better at the pace of everybody else getting better or everything else getting better, you are actually getting worse by trying to maintain. Even maintaining where you are takes a certain amount of dedicated work, all right? Because maintaining is actually moving forward. But the point of this is this, there is no fucking guarantee, bro. There's no

guarantee that you're going to do all this work and everything's going to work out and you're going to become a gazillionaire and you're going to live this crazy life. But there is a guarantee that if you don't try, you're going to live a shitty life. And that's what you need to be thinking about. And this is what paralyzes most people from ever going. When we think about how the process actually works and the young bucks think of it as a guarantee. What they're missing is, is that yes, you can have all the steps. Yes. You can have all the data. Yes. You can have the best plan in the world, but once you go out and start executing on that plan, shit's going to go wrong. You are

going to make mistakes. You are going to fuck things up. And every single time you make one of these mistakes, you learn a lesson. And when you learn that lesson, it helps sharpen a new skill that you didn't have before. So now you go out, you have this plan, you get punched in the fucking face, and then you say, okay, well, why did I get punched in the face? Well, I got punched in the face because I didn't do these things. And then you say, next time I'm going to do those things. Boom.

A skill is born. A new skill is born. You put it in your tool belt, and you are now better prepared to go down the path again. So you get up. You dust yourself off. You go again with this new skill so that when that situation presents itself the second time, you know what to do. So you can get past that. It's like a video game, bro.

You learn how to get past the hard parts by getting killed 50 times and then you figure it out and then you keep going. And as these hardships happen, you acquire more and more and more and more skills. If you continue to go down the path, which starts to produce a better and better and better and better result. And so while there's no way to guarantee the perfect outcome on your journey, your life will be exponentially better by going on it. And so when we think about, you know, what if I do all this shit and nothing happens and I fall on my face and I get made fun of and it's super hard and it takes a super long time, motherfucker, that's how it's gonna be okay and you're looking at it the wrong way you want the guarantee of the big house the car the boat the

big life when in reality if you don't go you're guaranteed shit and that's what you have to think about so it's not what do i what if i do all this work and i don't make it it's what if you don't do shit and you stay right where you are that's how you should be thinking about it would you say that that people too often they put way too much pressure on the external uh circumstances that could happen and throw shit off the plan and they don't focus enough on what they actually can't control a hundred percent you know what i'm saying like like it's way too much like, there's politics and all these other things. Yeah, of course, bro. People want to, listen, man. People want this to be cut and dry.

They want this to be easy. They want it to be quick. They want it to be painless. There's nothing easy, quick, and painless about being fucking great at building anything in life, creating anything in life, becoming anything in life. You are going to suffer. It is going to be hard. It is going to take all of your energy. It's going to kick you in the fucking face a thousand times.

You're going to be demoralized. You're going to be frustrated. You're going to be angry. You're going to be bitter sometimes. This is why it's so important to build yourself into someone who can execute regardless of what your mood is, regardless of what your circumstances is, because if you can execute when things are fucked up and everybody else bails and everybody else quits what kind of advantage does that give you over the long haul it gives you a tremendous advantage and if you can become the kind of person that cannot be stopped by outside circumstances or going through a tough time or being in a bad mood or being unmotivated how can anyone anyone fucking beat that? Who can stop that? The only thing that can stop that is fucking your own death or God. Okay. So this is the most

powerful version that you can become of yourself by becoming a disciplined human being that can execute regardless of the circumstances. And if you go out and you go on that path and you go that route, the guarantee for sure is a much better life. Now, can you say you're going to have a plane and cars and a big house? Bro, it depends on how good you are. Are you good? Are you smart?

Do you have skill sets? Are you investing to build those skill sets? Are you trying to learn this on the job or are you taking all your free time and all of your energy and all of your efforts and dedicating it to become the most skilled version of you in this lane that you're in as possible? Because I can tell you that anybody that wins at the highest level, that's how they operate. It might not be healthy. It might not be what most people want.

It certainly isn't balanced, but it's the real story. Real motherfuckers are obsessed with what they do. The people who win the biggest are fucking obsessed. You cannot argue that. I've met thousands and thousands and thousands of entrepreneurs and the best ones, the ones that win at the highest level, they are fucking obsessed. It's a huge priority over everything else in their life. And people will sit here and hear well that's not healthy well then fucking don't be a winner man i'm just telling you what it is you don't have to do it yeah i'm not saying you got to do it i'm not saying it's for you i'm saying what it fucking actually takes and nobody else wants to say that shit because you

can't fucking sell it you can't go out and sell the idea hey man this is going to beat your ass for the rest of your life and it's going to be hard and it's going to take everything and it's going to make everything else in your life come second place. And it's not going to be fun most of the time. And you're going to struggle most of the time. And it's going to be, how do you sell that to someone? No one talks about that because you can't sell it to people who aren't willing to do that. So there's all these people out here that are willing to tell people it's easy. It's quick. Just do this and do that and do this. And these people then try that and they fail. And then they find another one of these motherfuckers and then they try their shit and they fail. And then they find another one of these people who promises easy and they

try that and they fail. You know what they eventually say? Fuck, I guess I don't have what it takes. And they quit and they reside themselves to some mediocre existence that's far below their actual potential because they're not being told the truth about the game. The game will take everything you have. And if you want to win at a mediocre level, it'll take less. If you want to win at the highest level, it's going to take more. And that's the way the fucking cookie crumbles when it comes to this.

And you can argue about it. You can bitch about it. You can judge it. I don't give a fuck. But that is the way the fucking cookie crumbles when it comes to this. And you can argue about it. You can bitch about it. You can judge it. I don't give a fuck. But that is the way it is. Love it, man. It's the fucking truth, dude. There's too many people out here that want this shit easy.

And notice, none of them win on a big scale. There might be a couple people out here that got some cars and have some shit and be winning. But what the fuck have they built? Well, look at them in five years. If you're going to be a world-changing fucking cleaner motherfucker like Tim Grover talks about, it's going to take everything, bro. It takes free throws at 3 o'clock in the fucking morning like MJ and fucking Kobe did.

That's what the fuck it takes. It takes total obsession, dude. And most people ain't built for it. And we have this entire culture out here that's telling everybody that being their own boss is about freedom and it's about fun and it's about doing whatever you want and you get to, and they're all liars. They're all lying. That's not how the fuck it is, bro. It's total fucking obsession to your craft. Now I'm talking about the highest level winners. If you want to win less than that, it's going to take less obsession. If you want to win less than that it's going to take less obsession if you want to win mediocre and just have some money and have a bass boat and like live a life that's cool too

it's going to take less but the reality is i'm not here to talk to the fucking people who want to win less i'm here to talk about people that want to win at the highest level love it man fuck man guys andy our third and final question. Question number three. Andy, when you do have those times of fun, culture building gatherings or parties, what have you found to be the most effective after the event in pulling your team back into gear to focus on the mission and put the fun behind them and get back to work. I'm struggling with this in my business after we have a company event. Any thoughts on this?

I think you're thinking about it wrong. That's not how I think about it at all. I think about the fun events that we get to do as reminding people how awesome it is that we get to do this shit every day. There is an understanding that when we walk in the doors here, it is all business, bro. And yes, we get to do this shit every day. There is an understanding that when we walk in the doors here, it is all business, bro. And yes, we're going to have fun. And yes, we're going to fuck around with each other. And we're going to tell jokes and we're going to keep it light and we're going to play games and do all the fun shit that everybody

thinks our companies are on social media. But there's an understanding you're going to fucking execute at a high level and everybody knows that. And how i how i look at the the fun events is that it gives us some momentum it gives us some boosts it gives us to lighten up and and to remember why it is we get to do what we do how awesome it is we get to do what we do and it reminds everybody of what a blessing it is to be surrounded with the quality of people that we are here in our organizations. And I want that feeling to last as long as possible. I don't want to stop that the next day and say, hey, no more having fun. There's time for if you're doing that that you're looking at it and i would say hey use these events to remind people how blessed we are to go to do important things with this level of quality people

and why it's important that we execute day in and day out so we can continue to do these things with these awesome people so it's just a matter of perspective yeah it's like the events these like we're not talking about you know bringing events should be conference room for a fucking karen's birthday right these are meaningful things right yeah bro we spend millions of dollars on summer smash yeah every year well i mean well how do you how do you how do you how do you convey that to i guess a business owner who doesn't have that type of expense report to well i mean before before we were spending millions of dollars we were spending millions of dollars we were spending thousands of dollars or hundreds of dollars when we didn't have summer smash we

would have barbecues when we didn't have this awesome headquarters we would have customer appreciation barbecues at the back of our fucking stores like the events always start small and they grow into things sure but you don't want to the point of the matter is is you don't want to kill the momentum that these events create because you want guys to get back and be serious look bro people don't do their best work when they're serious they do their best work when they're appreciative of what they get to do they appreciate who they get to do it with they They're aligned on the mission. They're aligned on the goal. They get to contribute into whatever that is, whatever it is for you. And that creates a cohesive team that does great work.

And if you say to, if I walked in here every single day and I said, quit fucking around. Don't talk. Don't laugh. Don't do the work. Bro, we wouldn't, we would be, we would be a shitty company. You see, people would hate us. They would hate working here so i think as the organizer of a organization the leader of an organization whether that be a church

a charity a team a company whatever it is a gang i don't fucking know like whatever it is you're gonna drive by tuesdays yeah like it's all the dynamics i love that yeah but the dynamics all the same yeah we have a mission we have a purpose we're going to work towards this mission but we should also try to have fun doing it and appreciate the people that we get to do it with and i'll say this bro one of one of the best things in my life and a lot of people see the outside success they think you know oh dude andy's made a lot of people see the outside success. They think, you know, oh, dude, Andy's made a lot of money and he gets to fly around on private jets and he has all these cars and he does all this cool shit. He knows all these people. And they see that shit from the outside and they think that's what's cool.

You know what's fucking cool is that I get to wake up every motherfucking day and walk in this building and go to fucking war with people that give a fuck about what we do. And they're damn good at doing it. And that makes me proud. That makes me excited. That makes me have purpose in my life why haven't i people ask me all the time why haven't you sold your companies you could be doing no shit i could but like i love what i do what the fuck would i do these are my people these are my friends these are people i care about why the fuck would i do that i'm gonna what what is that worth to me what is selling my entire existence my entire friend group my entire purpose my entire mission life For some what's that worth in dollars?

There is no fucking dollar amount for that. Yeah, it's not but it's not for sale man And so, you know a lot of you guys who are running your companies you're missing out on a great opportunity To develop a lot of richness in your life by not appreciating what it is you do and who you get to do it with. And instead you're walking in every day, demanding some productivity. And by the way, I used to be that way. I used to be, because when you're not succeeding,

it's very important to produce. But what you'll find is that when everybody's having fun and everybody is bought in on the mission and everybody appreciates each other's contribution and their own contribution the the productivity happens organically yeah so um so anyway long story short i would stop trying to kill the fun and i would try to lengthen and extend it into your culture as long as you possibly can and you're going to have a better result. This sounds like someone who's walking in being like,

man, all these guys do are fucking around. Bro, that's the wrong attitude, man. Listen, are they getting it done? Are they producing high-level results? If not, it has nothing to do with them having fun. It has to do with you're not leading them to do the job the proper way. It's still a you problem. It is a you problem.

Every leadership problem is a problem with the leader every problem This is this is where this is where people don't want to hear that. No, they don't bro They don't this is where they fuck it up. Yeah, they want to dude How many times do we see people saying well, bro, it's impossible to get anybody to work these days. Really? I don't know We don't have a problem with it Yeah, we're all yeah you know what i'm saying or do we insulated no yeah we just have a different culture than you have and that culture comes from our leadership and you haven't put it in yet really it comes down dude you know what it really comes down to most of these people this is the truth man and like people are gonna get

pissed when i say this but most of you guys that run companies and lead people you're trying to fucking take advantage of people you want them to do all the fucking work you don't have any intention of growing something that's big enough for their dreams to fit under you don't really give a shit about them you're pretending that you give a shit and because you pretend they give a shit they don't give a shit about you because these people are not fucking stupid you're trying to ride their backs on a success without actually going out and building something that's going to benefit them. And your people know that. And that's why they don't respond to you.

Because you're a shitty fucking leader. And you don't have their interest in mind. I have these people's interest in mind in my companies. You know why I want to grow? First forming one of the greatest iconic American brands that's ever existed because I need to build the company big enough for these guys who have put in all this time to have their dreams inside of that. I have to, that's my obligation. They helped me do that. Now I have to help them do that. That's the way it fucking works if you're a great leader. So if you're leading an organization here

and you think you're going to fool these people into like coming this amazing team you're fucking wrong it's not gonna fucking happen and then on top of that tell them i'm not to have fun yeah look dude most of these problems from a leadership standpoint could be solved very quickly by understanding your obligation as a leader. You are responsible for these people's fucking lives. You are responsible for their career path. You are responsible for their fucking families. They are dedicating a huge part of their life to your cause. That is a huge obligation for you to build whatever it is you're building

into something that can support their dreams and trade for what they've put into your dreams. You see what I'm saying? It's a huge deal. And if you just thought about it that way, if you, instead of thinking about it, what can I get? You started thinking about what can I do? How can I grow the company? How can I create opportunities for my people? How can we get better? How can we do that? And you started thinking about it from a place of service and growth for the collective and not just yourself bro most of your problems will fix themselves but you guys can't connect that so connect that and a lot of this shit will solve itself i love it man guys andy that was three yep that's three guys go pay the fee