REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 75. Building An Empire Through Resistance

Episode Date: October 5, 2020

"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - Nick Saban. Nowadays, society glorifies mediocrity and villainize success causing people to get frustrated and discouraged at reaching their big goals. On today's episode, Andy shares the formula he's used in dealing with mediocre thinking people.

I told my teacher, dumb bitch, I'm gonna get millions. Watch this. In a project living. Damn. Spoke it till existence. Voila. Mode changed to 50. What up?

Got more cars than diddy. I only weigh 180, but my watch cost 250. What's up, guys? It's Andy Frisella, and this is the show for the realists. Say goodbye to the lies, the fakeness, and delusions of modern society, and welcome to motherfucking reality. Guys, today, we just just got a short real talk episode, okay? Before I get into what I'm going to talk about, I'd like to remind you guys just

really quick. First of all, I appreciate everybody listening and subscribing and spreading the word about the show. We don't advertise the show. The show is grassroots, homegrown, straight up. We provide value. People share it. That's how we do it. And we've been able to be one of the top shows in the world for a number of years because of that. And that's because of you. You guys know that we ask the fee, right? And the fee here is real simple. It's not money. Um, it's when you feel like you've got value when you laughed, when you learn something, when you enjoyed the show, when it brought you a different perspective, uh, when it made you think it made you question things. Um, all we ask is that you talk about the show and spread it around. That's it. Uh,

and I just want to say, you guys are doing a great job of that. And I wanted to say, thank you for doing so. Um, you know, this isn't, uh, something that I do because I get paid to do it. This is something that I actually spend a lot of money to do to provide value. And a lot of people always ask me, they're like, well, why do you do this show? Why do you, why do you give what you give and just put it out there? Well, the reason is, is because I realized after I sat down in 2014 and 15 to start writing some books with Vaughn, that not everybody has learned some of the things I've been fortunate enough to learn. You know, I didn't grow up in a quote unquote traditional home. My parents were divorced. I had, you know, step parents involved.

Both my families grew up owning businesses, small businesses, and I got to see a lot of things. Now, you know, we didn't always have the, you know, traditional family shit going on. A lot of times it was a shit show. But the flip side of that was I got to learn a lot of things that I wouldn't have learned otherwise. And what I try to do is basically help you guys realize and learn some of these skills that I was fortunate enough to learn growing up, but also mostly through my business experience for the last 22 years. And one of the things that I've learned more than any of the other things can be scaled to all of us. It can be scaled to every single person out there that's listening that wants to be better.

You guys know what it's like to start to dream big, to start to think big, to start to want to do more in life and earn more in life. And you know what happens the very first time you tell your friends and family that you're going to do X, whatever X is. X is your life plus whatever it is you're looking to bring into it to make it better, right? What happens? Oh man, you sure you want to do that? You know, that's going to take, that's going to take a long time. You know, that's going to be really hard. You know, not everybody makes it. Very few people make it, right? We start hearing these kinds of things. And while the people that care about us are telling us these things because they care and they don't want us to see us fall on our faces,

it's very discouraging and it's very frustrating and it's very hurtful. And I want to tell you guys that never goes away. Okay. I posted a quote this weekend that said, mediocre people don't like high achievers. And in return, high achievers don't like mediocre people. That's a quote by Nick Saban, one of the best coaches to ever walk on this planet. All right. And what does it mean? Does it mean that we hate mediocre people for trying to get there? No, that's not what it means.

Because as high achieving individuals, as people who aspire to get there? No, that's not what it means. Because as high achieving individuals, as people who aspire to be high achievers, the morally right thing for us to do is to help other people see how to win as well. I believe that in my heart. But what that quote does mean is that you are going to face resistance. You are going to face comments. You are going to face negativity. And what you have to realize is that that's a part of building something greater. When you start out and you say you're going to do all of these things, you have to understand that when other people who you've been familiar with your whole entire life hear those things, they don't hear, hey, Andy's going to go out and build this business and

improve his life and improve other people's lives. They don't hear that. What they hear is, oh, Andy thinks he's too good for me. Oh, this isn't enough for him. And it makes people feel insecure. All right. And we're all going to hear it. And it makes people feel insecure, all right? And we're all going to hear it. And we're all going to hear it at all levels. It doesn't matter if you're the day one entrepreneur or you're the day 1,000 entrepreneur or you're the day 10,000 entrepreneur. This shit always happens, okay? And guys, we have to realize that if we're going to be successful, if we're going to

build something, that dealing with negativity is just part of it, but how do you deal with it? What do you do? Do you argue with people online? Do you get into the mix and fight back and forth? No, that's not what you do. The game is always won on the field. It's not won in the comments section. It's not won in the likes. It's not one in the reviews. It's not one anywhere else, but in the real world, you guys have to realize that when you start. So if people are attacking you and people are being negative towards you and people want to see you lose, and that's how you feel. What do you do? Do you pout?

Do you cry? Do you feel sorry for yourself? No, you get the fuck up and you execute at a higher level. You have to be able to take those negative thoughts and use them and put them into productive action that's going to translate into wins on the field in the real world. Not on Instagram, not on fucking YouTube comments, not on text message arguments. None of that shit is where it counts. Where it counts is where your actions go. And guys, let me tell you, it doesn't matter what somebody's saying about you. It doesn't matter what someone thinks about you.

It doesn't matter what your friends from high school think. It doesn't matter what your Aunt Lucy thinks. It doesn't matter. What matters is how you execute. Are you executing on a day by day by day basis? And that's hard right now because the temperature in society is one of weakness. It's one of softness. It's one of villainizing success.

The whole society right now, everything around us celebrates mediocrity. It celebrates being average. It celebrates being like everybody else. And if you want to be different than anybody else, then you're greedy. You're an asshole. You're a prick. You're cocky. You're arrogant. You're all these negative things. And you're really not any of those negative things, all you're doing is doing what you know is going to be best for you. Okay. So my message here is really simple, guys. Understand that that quote by Nick Saban is something that you can pull out of your library that you keep in your brain

every time someone says something negative about you. True or not true, it doesn't matter. And most of the time, it's not true. Most of the time, it's just bitterness. Most of the time, it's jealousy. Most of the time, it's envy. And it's materializing into words. So what can you do?

Well, let me tell you what I do. Every single negative comment that's said about me that I hear about, I don't get mad. I get focused. I don't get mad. I get productive. I don't get mad. I execute because I know that the best thing that I can do while other people are saying negative things about me Is to get better And that's the best thing that you can do as well So when you think about all these people who have shit to say about your life when you think about all these people Who you feel like? Are quote unquote hating on you

Think of that quote by Nick Saban, mediocre people don't like high achievers. And in return, high achievers don't like mediocre people. That means it's expected. When you start getting those comments, what does that really mean? What it really means is that other people are starting to see you as a high achiever. They're starting to see you as someone who's winning. They're starting to see you as someone who's actually doing it. And that's a good thing. Okay. We can only win guys. When we focus on the positive, we can only win when we're productive. We can only win when we take the negativity that we hear, that we feel, that we see, and turn it into execution. That's what champions do. They hear the negative,

then they take it, they chew it up, they swallow it, and it comes out of them in form of things that will produce an actual result. If you can master that skill, if you can master the skill of taking other people's negative energy, digesting it, and then letting it come out of you in the terms of positive action and positive momentum and positive results,

you have a lifetime of energy. You have a lifetime of people feeding you things, information, feelings, emotions that are going to produce a better result for you and the people that surround you. Okay, this is a very difficult thing to do and it's a very easy thing to hear because what's our first reaction when we hear negativity?

We get all upset. Why the fuck are they saying that? Why are they doing that? That's not true. Well, it doesn't matter if it's true. It doesn't matter if it's true. What are you going to do? What are you going to do when you're running a $10 million company or you're running a

$20 million company or $100 million company? Are you going to reach out and try to smooth over every single thing that someone doesn't like about you? It's impossible. You can't do it because you're busy working on your company. So you have to remember, mediocre people don't like high achievers. That's the reality. We can do all we can to lift them up. We can do all we can to bring them along. We can do all we can to offer the hand, but if they don't take the hand, there's nothing you can do. You can't save those people. So I want you to remember that. Every time someone talks shit, every time someone says something that hurts your feelings, every time someone says something that's not feelings, every time someone says something that's not true, every time someone says something that gets under your skin, remember two things.

One, that means you're executing. That means you're worthy of talking about. That means you're doing something right. And as hard as that is to swallow, it's the truth. And the second thing to remember is this. Take the opportunity to master the skill of pivoting and producing positive action out of negativity. When people say things that hurt you, when people say things that frustrate you, when people lie about you, and they will, they will, especially when you get to a point where other people see it as success.

People are going to chip away. They're going to chip away your character. They're going to chip away at what you do. They're going to call you all kinds of names. When you hear those things, instead of wasting your energy, getting upset, because that's what most people do. Most people get really upset. They get really mad.

They spend the rest of their day in a bad mood. Instead of doing that, use it as fuel. Say, dude, I'm going to swallow that. Okay. Now what can I do to be better? Okay. I can do this. I can do this and I can do this today that are going to make me better. And take that anxiety, take that frustration, take that anger and go out and execute with it. The people that do that can't be beat. It's impossible. So guys, listen, man, one of the biggest questions I get still, and I, you know, I understand, man, like it's hard to hear these things. It's hard to see people that you think are your friends, you know, take little passive swipes or say negative things about you, right? It sucks.

But let me tell you something. That shit's never going to go away because now on day one, they're going to laugh. On year 22, like me, then instead of them laughing, they're going to be saying, you know what? Andy changed. He ain't the same guy. No shit. I ain't the same guy. That's the fucking point. I work my ass off to get where I'm at. You're going to work your ass off to get where you're at. And we shouldn't feel guilty about what we've done to get where we go, especially when it brings and improves the lives of people around us. So instead of getting mad when people

say things that are not nice or they disrespect you or they talk shit, remember, mediocre people don't like high achievers and high achievers don't like mediocre people. That's the bottom line here. If you could tell yourself that every single time you hear something that frustrates you, that makes you angry, that pisses you off, and you can then take that and have some peace with that. And then, because you're still going to remember it, right? You can't just wash that shit out of your brain. If you're like me, you're going to remember it forever. And I love that shit. You know why? Because every time I don't want to work out, every time I don't want to get that project done,

every time I don't want to have that meeting, and I could cancel any motherfucking meeting I want at any time. Every time I want to do that, you know what I remember? I remember the shit people say about me. I remember the negativity. I remember the lies. I remember the unfairness that people showed me. And I execute on that point better than I would have without it.

That's how champions build championship caliber lives. That's how greatness comes about. You can believe all this positive shit on the internet you want, but the truth is people hate. People hate anything that isn't them. And the truth of the matter is you ain't trying to be them. So what the fuck you worried about it for? There ain't nothing to worry about. The only thing you need to worry about are the two things I mentioned here. One, mediocre people ain't ever going to give you props like you want them to. It ain't ever

going to fucking happen. And I hate to say it like that, but it's the truth. Okay. People are not going to celebrate you while you're doing it. They're only going to celebrate you after it's so fucking obvious that you did what you said you're going to do, that they have to crush their own ego to admit that they were wrong. And sometimes that never happens. And it's not worth waiting for because if you're trying to prove yourself to these people over and over and over again, you're going to have a very empty existence. So my advice is this,

take the negativity, chew it up real good, real good. Get the taste of it in your mouth, swallow it down, digest it, let it come out of it in your mouth Swallow it down Digest it Let it come out of you In productive action And let your life Shove it down every motherfucker's throat That ever fucked with you

That's my advice I'll be here all fucking week