REAL AF with Andy Frisella - 821. Q&AF: Battling With Success, Recognition Vs Work Load & Balancing Work With Social Life

Episode Date: December 9, 2024

On today's episode, Andy answers your questions on how to deal with peers who think they are too good to fail at anything, how to effectively manage the good recognition that you are getting with the work load in your business, and what are some ways to properly manage time when balancing work with your social life.

What is up guys? It's Andy Purcell and this is the show for the realest say goodbye to the lies, the fakes and delusions of modern society and welcome to Mothafuckin' Reality. Guys today we have Q&AF. That's where you submit the questions and we give you the answers. Now you could submit your questions a few different ways. The first way is, guys, email these questions into askandy at andyfasola.com. Or you go on YouTube in the comments section on the Q&AF episodes, drop your question in

the comments. We'll pick some from there as well. Other times throughout the week, if you're a new listener, we your question in the comments. We'll pick some from there as well other times throughout the week If you're a new listener, we have shows within the show. We're gonna have CTI that stands for cruise the internet That's where we put topics of the day up here on the screen. We speculate on what's going on. What's true? What's not true? And then we talk about how we the people have to solve these problems going on in the world other times We might have real talk real talk is just 5 to 20 minutes of me giving you some real talk, some shit that I think you need to hear. And then

we have 75 hard verses. 75 hard verses, and by the way, we have a great episode coming up for that. 75 hard verses where people who come in the show, they talk about how they use 75 hard to reclaim their life, how their life was before, how their life is now, and how you can use the program to do the same as them. If you're unfamiliar with 75 hard is the initial phase of the Live Hard program, which is the world's most popular mental transformation program in history. It's free. Okay.

You can get it episode 208 on the audio feed. Again, that's 208 audio feed only. There's also a book at andyforsella.com called The Book on Mental Toughness, which outlines the entire Live Hard program plus a whole bunch of other stuff, a bunch of chapters on mental toughness, why it's important, how to cultivate it,

how to use it to build your best life, a whole bunch of case studies on some very famous people who have used mental toughness to become the very famous people that you recognize. Now, again, you can get that at AndyFurzella.com, the book on mental toughness. Now, we do things a little different here. You're going to notice that we don't run ads on the show. I think we're the biggest show in the world that doesn't run ads.

I'm pretty confident in that. The reason we don't run ads is because we talk about the things that people don't want us talking about, all right? And I want to talk about those things. Now, I don't want to listen to somebody tell me what I can and can't say. All right? So we finance the show ourselves. I don't fill your ears full of 20 minutes of bullshit ads. All right? We just get right down to it. And I ask very simply that you do something for us. All right? Please share the show. Help us grow the show. If you don't share the show, the show doesn't

grow. It's that simple. All right? So if the show makes you don't share the show the show doesn't grow. It's that simple All right So if the show makes you think if it makes you laugh if it gives you a new perspective If it's something that gives you value it teaches you something Please do us a solid and share the show. All right, don't be a hoe show the show. All right. What's up? What's going on man? Oh not much. What's up with you? Yeah, not much man You know, I was just thinking, so, it's about to be 25 years in business for you, right?

26. 26, yeah, it's like right around the time. Started in 99. Yeah, yeah. Right around the time, yeah. So, 26 years ago, all right, hot law Andy, running around, you're like, I'm gonna start a business. Yeah. Like, what was the jump to like? All right, let's do this

I what well cuz I'm sure there was times where it's like, okay, you like we might have thought about it But like what made you actually get serious and my god, we're fucking doing this well First of all, I never was what you would consider a good student Yeah, I wasn't dude. I get I wasn't engaged in school. It wasn't for me The more challenging the class was the better I did Which was very weird because I went through school pretty much being considered not very smart and

It wasn't that I wasn't very smart. What I learned later was I was smarter than everybody else and the shit was boring. And- Wasn't being challenged. Yeah, at all. And every time I was challenged, I'd get an A. But in every other class, I'd get a D because it was just so fucking boring.

So I knew that like the traditional life of go out, get a job, you know, get the white picket fence, you know, get married, have 2.5 kids. That traditional life has never really been an interest of mine. And that's a hard thing for people to understand because I feel like most people have that dream. That wasn't ever my dream.

My dream was I wanna build something for myself, I wanna be an entrepreneur. And that was my main drive since I was a little kid you know, drive since I was a little kid. I mean, when I was a little kid, dude, I was doing, I was selling baseball cards on top of a fucking igloo cooler. You know what I'm saying? Doing lemonade stands, snow cone stands,

selling shit door to door. I always had that entrepreneurial spirit. It's just something I always had. And when I got done with high school, I tried to go to college. I went to St. Louis University here in St. Louis for a semester and it was horrible. I fucking hated it.

And I hated everything about it, dude. I hated having to go there. I didn't like the way I felt when I walked in the building. I felt like I didn't belong there. It just felt wrong. And I did have one class that I liked, which was a higher level political science class that I took that I did very well in. But that was the only class that I enjoyed. And the rest of it just seemed like bullshit. You know, I'm in there learning about things that, you know, are very basic that I felt like I already knew. And I just didn't want to do it.

And so Chris and I started talking about, you know, starting a business together. And at first we were starting, uh, we wanted to start a tanning salon and we didn't have the money to start a tanning salon because one tanning bed was like 40 grand. Okay. So like we have any money, we had $12,000 between the two of us. And so we landed on a nutritional supplement store. And that's, that was something we had interest in. It was something that we were both, you know, already learning about and already using in our day to day lives. We both were athletes, we both loved to train. And we came up with supplement superstores.

And that's where it started, dude. Well, actually, because I mean, dude, 26 years, that's a quarter of a century. That's a long fucking time. You know what I'm saying? I just think it's cool to always just look back every now and then. It's like, what was the,

what was their specific moment, I guess, in that time where it's like, okay, shit's getting real. Like we're actually doing this. Like what, what was that? What was that moment for you for you and Christmas? Like, all right, shit, we're actually doing this. It wasn't there. I don't think it was like that. Like there wasn't there. Once we like said, Hey, we're going to do this. We just did it. Yeah. It wasn't like a thing where we overly questioned or we second guessed or,

you know, and I think that's a big problem for most people. I think most people think themselves out of success. I think they think themselves out of great relationships with people. I think they overanalyze everything, looking for the problems that are going to a court that they can't even, they can't even fix until it shows up. And so they, they look down the lane and they're like, oh, this could happen and this could happen and this could happen and this could happen and this

could happen. And it paralyzes them into staying in the same spot they're in. And I see that in business. I see that in life. I see that really everywhere. And that's why I say, you know, the last few years of what we've been talking about on real AF, especially what's been going on in the world, I started to come to a conclusion that the reason that most people never build anything is because they lack the courage to go. They lack the courage to stand out. They lack the courage to speak up. They lack the courage to go do something because they're afraid of what might happen if they go. And the thing that they don't realize is,

is that no matter how good you plan, no matter how much you analyze, no matter how perfect the roadmap may be to where you're trying to go, there's going to be obstacles and there's going to be things that come up. And so the magic is in the commitment and then the commitment to solve these problems as they come. And I think most people just don't get that. They want the perfect route. They want the perfect plan. They want it to be guaranteed. And there is no guarantee on this.

There's no guarantee on business. There's no guarantee on life. There's no guarantee on friendships. There's no guarantee on relationships. The only guarantee that you can make to yourself is that if you don't commit to working through the problems as they come, you're going to not have anything. Whatever the problem. Yeah, right. And that's going to be the guarantee that you're left with. You're guaranteed to not have anything. Whatever the problem is. Yeah, right. And that's gonna be the guarantee that you're left with.

You're guaranteed to have nothing. And nothing of value. And so, I never had that hesitation. When I make up my mind that I'm gonna do something, I do it. And I've always been that way. So I don't try to look too far down the road, dude, because we end up talking ourselves out of the best things.

You know, like what if I had sat there back in 1999, I said, yeah, man, nobody's going to take us serious. Somebody might break into the store. We might get sued. What if, what if, what if? Yeah. Guess what? All those things happened.

Every single one of them. You're what if our employees screw us over? What if, uh, what if somebody steals from us? What if of them. What if our employees screw us over? What if somebody steals from us? What if this happens? What if that happens? What if this happens? And all the shit happens anyway.

So like, what are you going to do? Not go and have all the shit happen anyway? Or are you just going to go and deal with it as it comes? And so, you know, success requires courage in any area of life. And the last few years when nobody would speak up because they were afraid, it really gave me some insight as to where people are lacking in terms of creating their own, you know, best version of their life. It's a courage to go, man.

Yeah, for sure. How do you balance though with having a bigger vision? So you say you don't want to overthink yourself into being paralyzed but let's say somebody has a big vision and they don't want to overthink so how do they balance with what you're saying? Just breaking it down to daily tasks dude you know what I'm saying like I don't like when I think of what we're trying to do with our companies I don't have to know every detail of how we're gonna get. I know that when I show up today, I'm going to take the step today. And I know when I show up tomorrow, I'm going to take another step.

And I know that if I show up enough days in a row and take enough steps, even though I might not know the exact way to get there, we'll figure it out amongst the nuance of the path. You see what I'm saying? Be like me and you in the jungle and we're fucking cutting down trees and we're like, well, I think it's this way, you know, and we go down that way and we're like, ah, it ain't this way. So let's go back over here. And it's trial and error. It's just a commitment to the progress, you know? So I don't, I don't think that overanalyzing is helpful. I think it's paralyzing for most people, you know,

we're always going to find problems and we're always going to find what we're looking for. You know, if you look for problems, you're going to find problems and we're always gonna find what we're looking for You know if you look for problems You're gonna find problems if you look for solutions and you look for ways to make it work and you look for ways to make it Successful your those things are gonna pop out as well. So, you know, I Think a big vision is the same as a small vision. It just takes more time, you know, I love it man I love it. Well guys, you know you love it, man. I love it. Well, guys, Andy. We know you love it.

Yeah, I do, man. It's cool. You love it, and everybody loves that you love it. Yeah, that's good. That's good. Well, I'm glad you guys love it. So, with that, I got three good ones for you, man. Guys, Andy, question number one.

Hey, Andy, what's your opinion on an entrepreneur who, after achieving some success in their first five years believe that they have the Midas touch and assumes they can easily replicate that success in other ventures? Do you think this could risk undermining the original business that brought them success? that brought them success. Like you, I view entrepreneurship as a constant uphill battle filled with these challenges and setbacks along the way that require unshakable determination to overcome. It just frustrates me when entrepreneurs

and their onlookers buy into a false image of what it truly takes to run a profitable, successful business, especially during the early stages, when the reality is often far from what's portrayed on social media. Have you ever questioned the success of your peers, knowing the struggles that you've had to personally endure, to build your own business and the longevity you needed

in your marketplace to reach your goals? And should entrepreneurs revisit the myth of Icarus during periods of success to remind themselves of the importance of humility. Please advise. Yeah, 100%. I love that question. That's a fucking great question.

You guys want to ask questions on the show, ask questions like that. That's a great philosophical question about the mental state that you have to have when you're pursuing your dream. And it's very easy when you start to have some success to believe that it's you and to think that it's you and it's not you. What it is actually is a past version of you that took all the steps necessary to create the present success. So it's not even the present you that's created the success.

It's who you were the last 60 days, the last six months, the last year that's created the present success. So the first thing that you have to realize is that you today didn't even create what the fuck you are living. That's the past you. So like when you do a little cheers and you're out with your buddies, cheers your past self for being tough enough to fucking persevere to create where you are. Secondly, you need to realize that if you don't continue to move in that direction,

you're going to lose. All right? And this is where ego comes in and humble comes in. Okay? Humble is not about the car you drive or the house you live in. Humble is about recognizing when you're getting a little bit too much belief in yourself and you're not realizing that you are the product of the actions that you've taken. And that's something that people struggle with, especially when they first have success. You mentioned the Icarus story.

If you guys don't know the Icarus story, he flew too high to the sun. He got too cocky. The sun melted the wax that held his wings together. He died. All right. So that's a metaphor for what happens to us in life, in relationships and in success. We start taking things for granted. We think that we are the reason for everything good around when in reality we are not the reason.

We are the product of actions. And so when you think about how to apply this concept, you mentioned the Midas Touch. For those of you that don't understand what he was saying, I use this analogy of the Midas Touch for those of you that don't understand what he was saying I use this analogy of the Midas Touch with young entrepreneurs okay and there's this thing called the Dunning-Kruger effect and basically what the Dunning-Kruger effect says is that someone who starts out and has moderate success instantly they have an inflated sense of what they actually know they think that they are the shit. They think that the reason they're winning is because they are the shit and nobody else is the shit.

It's them. Okay. And what happens is they find out real soon that that's not actually the case. Okay. The actual case is you did some basic things that produced a little bit of success and you have a lifetime of learning to still go through. And so what happens is, and usually how this happens is someone has some success and then they lose it and then they come back down the Dunning-Crubert curve and end up at the bottom and now you're in a position of humility. Now you're saying, all right, what did I do to fuck up?

How could I get back to going? And it almost takes that desperation of losing to that level to create the humbleness needed to recognize that you need to go back to the basics of what you did to get to the place in the first place. So these are all real things. And yes, people struggle with them. The Midas Touch is where people who have a little bit of success

start to believe that they can do anything. Let's say you are, you know, you're a contractor that does concrete and you're fucking doing concrete your whole life and you've built this amazing concrete business and it's making you, you know, seven figures a year personally. You're doing really well with it. That person will then think, well, I can open a snow cone stand, okay? Something that's completely unrelated to what they do and I can make it work because I made this work. And that's not the case. That's like saying, because I play the oboe at professional level, then I can go play the saxophone the exact same way. And that's, they're two different

things. And people don't understand that. Every business has its own knowledge base, its own skill set that you need to have. Now, are there people that know the structure of companies and how to find people and put them in the right spots? Yes, I can do that. I've been doing that for a long time. But that's not me having the expertise,

that's me having the resources to hire the people with the expertise, put them into play, and get them to run. Okay? So it's possible to do, but it's not good for an inexperienced entrepreneur with little resources because it can, like mentioned in the email, undermine the entire original business, which then cuts off your cash flow, which makes you broke. All right? So it's very important to understand you are where you're at because of actions that your past self took. And if you don't continue to improve that skillset and take those actions at a bigger and higher level, you will not grow as an entrepreneur. Your business will not grow. And if you don't do that and instead you say, well, I'm going

to go open the snow cone stand when really I'm an expert in concrete. Now you have a real problem because you're going to go fuck something up. May not be the snow cone stand, maybe the thing after that, but you're end up, you're going to end up cutting off your initial, you know, income stream. It's allowing you to have these options because you're misunderstanding your own skillset and how to apply it. So it's very important that we recognize that just because we're good at one skill set and how to apply it. So it's very important that we recognize that just because we're good at one business doesn't mean we're gonna be good at another business.

And if you get to a point where you can invest in other businesses and you're very successful, you never wanna sacrifice your main courses for these other businesses. You see what I'm saying? Yeah, right. Right, I mean, I think there's, I mean, obviously this is a very in-depth topic

That's covered and we could talk about this 50 fucking different hours. Yeah and our taste a great resource for people who are sure stuff, but Just quit the new MS CEO project. Yeah, that's gonna be fucking awesome. I can't fucking wait I can't wait to get back to talking about how to win all the time. Like that, what I've learned is that's what I love to talk about. I love it. It was necessary, man.

It was necessary. But I do wanna ask you this question because- And by the way, we're not quitting CTI. A lot of people are like, oh, don't stop CTI. No, it's two different things, guys. We got what's going on in the world, comedy, fuck around, have fun.

And then we got how to win so that we can fix the culture here in this country. Yeah. Now I'm not an entrepreneur, right? Like I've always, I would fall in the category of everybody else, right? And I think, you know, outside looking in,

there's always been this idea of, and you've heard, I know you've heard it, man. Like, oh, you gotta diversify yourself, have these seven different, you know, things going on. Income streams. Yeah gotta diversify yourself, have these seven different things going on. Income streams. The average millionaire has seven different income streams. Right, right, okay. 2022 was, 2020,

this is what we're gonna see for the next month. 2022 was the rebuild. 2023 was the reconstruction. 2024 was the trial. And 2025 is game time as we're gonna see for the next fucking 30 days. And say motherfucker posting that shit every fucking year too. How many fucking practice years do you need?

Motherfucker. You need another one? Trial 3.3. Yeah. Yeah. Fuck out of here. Oh, but I do want to ask you this because we started off this show talking about, you know, 26 years in business. It makes me feel old Bro, it's a good thing. I don't look old. Yeah, you don't you look 26. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, I got you bro

I got you see that But I do want to add you guys got some value around Well, I want to ask you because we started about talking about you know that first business of yours, right? I can and you started that in 99 You're talking about that first business of yours, right? And you started that in 99. At what point did the second, I guess, the second opening come where you were like, okay, well, we're doing this really, really well.

Now we can advance and it wasn't like a straight- This is a great question. Or is it a vertical? This is great. So there is exceptions to what I just said about starting businesses. And one of them is verticals within your business. So like, let's say you're making motorcycles

and you're working on motorcycles all day long and you got this, and then all of a sudden you make some exhaust, right? Because it goes together. And so that's what we did. We had retail supplements, retail nutrition, vitamins, all those things. And then we worked, we sat there for 10 years

being like, well, these guys are doing this wrong, these guys are doing that wrong, but we didn't have the money to do it, you know? And so Chris and I sat there for years being like, well, if we ever get the opportunity to do it, here's what we would do. And then when the opportunity presented itself, because we had talked about it for so long,

we had a really good idea of how we were gonna do it. And we just fucking went for it. And I'll be honest, that was a very difficult situation to get off the ground, but it was a big, it was a vertical in our system that we felt comfortable that we knew and understood because of our experience in retail. And when we first started, everybody was like,

oh, that's never gonna fucking work. Well, here we are, motherfuckers. So if you know what you know, and you know how to, these vertical aspects that fit into your core competency, those are businesses that you would really wanna look at trying to open. Instead of being a concrete guy and wanting to open a fucking snow cone stand,

you might wanna open your own concrete tool line. You see what I'm saying? Or something. A proprietary mix. Yeah. Something that's in line with what you already know. And then you're leveraging your own customer base. You know what I'm saying?

So you don't have to go out and find a whole... The customers that want snow cones and the customers that want a concrete fucking walkways, two different things, right? But if you can figure out a way to vertical those in, you don't have to go out and replicate a whole new customer base. Okay, yeah, I mean, that was the question, man, because I feel like that comes up a lot.

Yeah, it's just vertical integration of your business. Like, dude, that's, that's very, you know, people will argue against it and they'll say, well, it doesn't make sense. Just use this drop shipper in this and do this and contract this out Yeah, I mean you could do it that way But I could tell you this your company makes a lot more fucking money when you do it the right way the slow way and The vertical way. Yeah, it's just way more profitable. Yeah, I mean it makes sense to me, man

I love it man guys Andy question number two. Let's keep this cruise. Oh Let's keep this show moving. Well, I'm gonna say keep the cruise moving. That's all right guys Andy question number two I have a question I'm a business owner in the automotive performance world. I've been doing it for myself since 2015 I do a lot of resto my, GM vehicles, as well as late model performance, stock to 2,000 horsepower. I am the only employee. Though every once in a while I have put some part-time help in, it seems hard to find good help in South Florida. Employees are good for a few months, they didn't get lazy

and forget things. And I feel I treat them good with bonuses, hourly pay, competitive, all that good stuff. I have only ever dreamt of working on these cars like 69 Camaro Chevelle smoking in the bandit Trans Am even as far as celebrities like Marquis and Mike Pouncy Rick Ross I currently have one of his cars at my shop I'm a very wealthy. I am six months shy of 40 years old and feel as I get more recognition for my line of work, I get more stress. Customers wanting work to their cars. They want them quick. People showing up for quotes, et cetera, et cetera. The question is, how do I manage to handle all this recognition and the workload

flooding in? I would appreciate any insight to this question. I mean, real talk, bro, it sounds like you're kind of bitching about something that could be a lot worse. You know, why don't you remember all the times when nobody gave a fuck who you were and nobody knew who you were and nobody wanted to do the fucking work or have you do any work on it?

Okay, you're in a good spot and you're kind of spitting the gift towards mouth, you know what I'm saying? Like, fuck dude. You wanted this, bro. You wanted this. So let's talk about, instead of complaining and saying, oh man, I don't know what to do,

let's talk about how great this is for you. Okay, you've built a brand, you've built an in-demand personal brand, people are starting to know who you are, you're getting some celebrity clientele, which I know enough about the car business, which is super helpful, okay? So how are you gonna leverage that? And that's what you need to be thinking. How am I going to leverage that? How am I going to scale that? You know, you said I'm the only employee. Well, what if you had 20 employees pop out a fucking car a week or car every

two weeks? How much money could you make? Right. And by the way, would you be happy doing it or would you be happy doing it yourself? One of my buddies who's one of the most famous fucking craftsmen in the world, he prefers to work by himself. And so everything he makes is super expensive because he does it on his own. All right, so there's multiple places you can go here. You can raise your price and do all the work yourself. You can work to scale out a team,

take on more work, make more profit. It depends on how you want to do it. But I want to go back to something that you said. You know, you said most of these employees are lazy or don't, you know, they forget shit after a week or whatever. Dude, that is you not leading them. Like that's you not leading them. Like I guess it's not the fucking employees fault that they're fucking not productive, bro. It's your fault. You hire them in. That is your responsibility. Of course they have to meet you halfway and they got to do their part and most people want to do their part. And if they don't want to do their part, you either hire the wrong people or, and this is is more likely you're not painting the proper vision

That makes them believe that they can have a future working for you who the fuck wants to show up and get paid 15 bucks an hour to get grease on their fucking hands or whatever you're paying them and go home and not have any fucking Future like imagine how hard that is imagine how hard it is to get up every single day and work for a company that We have no idea where it's going We have no idea if I'm gonna have an opportunity here like all the people that you are bringing in they're coming in and they're Like this is great for now, but I gotta find something else and the reason they're feeling that way is because you're not leading them You're not saying hey, we're gonna become the biggest custom car Build builder in the world or whatever it is you want to do, right? But these

guys and their fucking lives and their dreams, you're asking them to trade a major thing, which is their life and their dream. And so you have to figure out how to get that inside of your dream. And because you're a mechanic or, you know, Bill, I don't want to, know you're you're a mechanic or you know Bill I don't want to you know you're a car builder you're not your leadership skills that's a different skill set that's like that's like saying you know like I said playing the saxophone or playing the oh it's a different thing and so you need to learn leadership skills and understand how to paint your vision which should look like this. Hey bro, come work for me.

We're gonna fucking do this and this and this. We're gonna get Rick Ross's out there. We're gonna get Mike Pouncey's car out there. We're gonna, you know, we're gonna show all these people the cool shit that we do and we're gonna build this awesome brand, change the car culture. Like bro, car culture is one of the easiest cultures to work with. Everybody's cool. Everybody's friendly. It's just, my point is you have to build a vision for these people that they see a part in or you're going to be running through employees forever. And then by the way, you have to mean it.

It can't be lip service. Because the only thing worse than not having a vision is lying to your people and saying the vision is this. Because once they figure that out, they fucking all gonna leave. And then you're fucked. Yeah. So it's like you said in the beginning, but like most people have that vision is this, because once they figure that out, they fucking all gonna leave. And then you're fucked. Yeah. So it's like you said in the beginning,

but like most people have that vision of like, okay, I want the family, I want the white picket fence. And so you gotta fucking have an environment. How can they do that? Yeah. How can you, how can you have a family, own a home, have the American dream inside of your system? How can your people do that?

And if you can't tell them how to do that, then you're gonna have a problem keeping people long-term. Yeah, I love that, man. I wanna ask you this though, because, you know, I know obviously we've met, I met a few people through you, because of you, right? That, and I don't know if this is the right term I guess you would use, but they've learned how to,

I guess, finesse the supply and demand aspect of the solar entrepreneur right like you got guys like your tattoo artists right like that's a one-man show and His demand is very fucking high because he it's only one guy. You know, I'm saying he's tattooing you by himself So like I mean, maybe leadership is not his best thing. He wants to keep it solo How do you I guess how do you leverage? how do you finesse that supply and demand of yourself? Well, that's gonna be an aspect of, if you only have so much time and it's gonna be a one-man show or a two-man show,

then your price gonna have to go up. And that's just reality. But the work has to fucking equate to that. Match the price. Oh, yeah, yeah. You're not gonna charge big price for mediocre work. Yeah, yeah, all right, I love it, man. Oh, yeah. Yeah, you're not gonna charge big price for mediocre work. Yeah. Yeah. All right. I love it, man I love it guys Andy. Let's get to our third and final question guys question number three

Hey, Andy, I am 23 years old. I've been watching your show for two months It has been helping me in so many ways. I want to ask you about the time management When we focus on our goals we have to put so many hours into it and it affects our social lives. Sometimes to our family and the closest friends, I feel regret about not giving enough time to them. But I know if I don't put enough time into my work then I would not be happy and achieve what I want or it would take more time to reach there, I don't want a delay in that. How do I balance those things?

You can't, you can't look at balance and think that it's appropriate for building a company. It's the hardest thing in the world. Building a company, becoming an entrepreneur has been glorified to the point where people think they can do it and have everything else too. It's fucking impossible because it's too competitive. All right, so your idea of balance

as everybody else has balance is not appropriate to you being an entrepreneur and having balance, okay? It's two different things. You're out here in the world and you're seeing all these memes and all these Instagram therapy fucking bullshit things that are written and you're thinking they apply to you they don't fucking apply to the entrepreneur

that's a different life okay and it you will not have balance at least for the first fucking five to ten years you're not gonna have balance you're gonna have to put it in but here's the good news in 10-15 years when you've put in all that you're gonna be the guy that could take care of everybody you could solve everybody's problems, you can make their life more comfortable, and they're gonna be very thankful for you. And yeah, you might lose some friends

and you might distance some relationship, but the net positive out of it outweighs that, all right? But you guys have to understand, all this shit that you read online, all these memes about balance, all these things about, you know, that the average person is reading is like, yeah, they are not written for entrepreneurs. Okay, they're not. It takes more. It takes it's harder. It takes way longer. And the reward is way bigger. Okay. It takes a lot more risk. Usually when things take more risk

and they're harder and they take longer There's a bigger payoff and that's what the fuck entrepreneurship is about. So you are Investing your time today into an outcome that will produce results. It's not a sacrifice people say Oh, it's a sacrifice because I'm sacrificing my time with this with my friends No, you're making an investment in your future self that is going to be exponentially worth it as Opposed to you being in the same financial position that you're in now ten years from now Yeah, all right

So you have to look at this the right way and you have to stop looking at all this touchy feely therapy fucking bullshit That's on the internet because it'll make you feel as an entrepreneur that you're totally fucking up and it's just the way it is as an entrepreneur it's it's a it's you have to be selfish first to be selfless later and that's the reality of being an entrepreneur you're gonna carry the water you're gonna carry the weight you're gonna put the shit on your back and fucking drag it down the road but

then later everybody's to be happy you did it because everybody's going to benefit from it. So we can't look at all of this shit out there. You know, we have this victim culture mentality still that has been propagated for the last decade all over social media. And quite honestly, uh, you know, 90 fucking 5% of the therapy industry is predatory towards this culture. They want people to feel like victims so that they have to quote unquote heal for the rest of their lives. When are they healed? When do they actually become a normal person again? They don't because they want to capture these people and get them in a mentality

that there's always something fucked up around them because that equals money to them. Okay. There's very few quote unquote therapists that actually cure people. Why is that? Oh, because it's counterintuitive to their income stream. And that's the reality. People don't like that. But on top of all of that, on top of, you know, victim culture and taking advantage of it, which by the way, if you've convinced someone that there's something wrong with them and then you make them pay you to fucking fix it You're a piece of shit. Okay, and I'll give a class I don't give a fuck how many fucking letters you have behind your name. Yeah, all right, but the truth 100% Yeah, a hundred imagine think it's someone's telling someone they're fucked up so they could pay you and then trying to keep them in that

Zone that they're fucked up. All right, that'd then trying to keep them in that zone that they're fucked up All right, that'd be a hundred bucks. That's what I'm saying. Yeah, like bro. It's fucking bullshit. That is okay and Because we have that in society We have a lot of the entrepreneurs a lot of the achievers a lot of the people who are driven Which are some of the most important people in the world And in fact, they're probably the most important because they provide all of the goods and services that create civilized society all right so when we shame them about going out and building things and we make them feel bad about becoming successful and we make them feel fucked up for being

entrepreneurs the rest of society suffers because some of the greatest fucking ideas and the greatest inventions and the greatest solutions and the greatest cures Die on the vine because of the shame culture puts on people to have ambitions and goals alright, and so this is a big problem because what we're actually doing is we're silencing and Removing some of the best ideas for a civilized society because we're telling motherfuckers They're morally out of line for wanting to achieve it. All right. So we have to get in line here and understand that when you read all this shit on the internet about, you know, having zero anxiety and zero stress and all this fucking shit that is made for someone who

is not trying to build something incredible. They are not wanting more. They are not trying to become wealthy. They are not trying to create jobs or solutions or cures to things. These are just people going through life. And the truth of the matter is, is the reason they have so much fucking anxiety is because they're not fucking doing anything

with their life, all right? So we have to understand. And by the way, I'm gonna say another thing that everybody needs to understand about this. When you look for an anxiety free day and you look for a stress free day and you constantly look for that, what ends up happening is because you can't get through a single day without anxiety and you can't get through a single day without these feelings of stress, it's impossible because it's called life. All right, what ends up happening is

the little moments of anxiety that do pop up in your day become hugely amplified and become a problem because you're expecting there to be none. So if you're expecting there to be none, and then some shows up, what's your response? Fuck dude, I can't get through a single day without being stressed. I can't get through a single day without being stressed I can't get through a single day without feeling anxiety Well, no shit because that's called life and you read all this bullshit on the internet. That isn't true

Thinking that you can eliminate these things when in reality you can't so if you can't eliminate them and you're trying to focus on Having a free day without this shit or a life without this shit You're going to constantly be irritated and disappointed and frustrated because it's impossible okay so we have to understand number one most of this therapy shit is garbage number two you're not fucked up for wanting to achieve things number three we need people like you we need people to go out and win we need people to go out and drive cool cars we need people to show people what it looks like to be successful. We need cures. We need products. We need companies. We need jobs. All of these things are needed. And just because

some fucking pussy on the internet is writing this shit that makes you feel touchy and feely and shit doesn't mean it's for you. Okay? So we have to discern what information is for entrepreneurs and success driven, ambitious people and what information is for everybody else. It's not going to do a fucking thing. Okay. And we didn't know the difference. Is Michael Jordan going to read that and say, Oh yeah, you know what?

I need to back off my competitiveness because it's unbalanced. Right. You know, that's not, that's it doesn't go together, dude. And because we're inundated with all of this shit and it's popular We end up in this scenario where we think there's something really wrong with us When in reality bro, the world needs what the fuck we have the world needs what we have in our heart It needs that fucking drive. It needs that ambition. It needs that competitive attitude It needs someone to drive the motherfucking Bugatti's bro. If you don't drive them who the fuck's gonna drive them Yeah, you know what I'm saying?

Like, fuck dude. Nice. Yeah, I'm just saying like, dude, somebody's gotta win, it might as well be you. I love that, man. Dude, it's so crazy, cause I was thinking about this too while you were talking about that.

They label these things so easily and make it seem like it's the catch. Right, like the thing that I think happened in the last year, two years maybe, is the fucking hashtag FOMO, right? Like the fear of missing out shit. You know what I'm saying? I've never understood that. Like you're missing out on what though?

The same shit you've seen a hundred times? You know what I'm saying? Like that's never been used to do. You gotta understand, there is multiple levels to this game, okay? There's people who want to be an entrepreneur but can't really jump. Those people usually end up being franchise owners

and they end up being great ones. Okay, they're not able to create the entire concept, but they're able to run one if you give it to them. Okay, then you have people who create their own shit. All right, these are like true builder, creator entrepreneurs. They come up with an idea. The idea comes to fruition in real life.

And then we have people who think completely outside the boundaries of reality, Elon Musk, I want to go to space. You saw, you saw what I'm saying? I want to transmit, uh, electricity through the air. Nikolai Tesla, right? Like there's levels to the thinking. And you have to understand and be self-aware enough as to what category you fit in.

Because if you put yourself in the wrong category from an authentic aspect, you're gonna be miserable. All right, like I know which one I am. I'm the middle guy there. I'm not the fucking guy who says let's go to space, right? You know, I don't know. I just I want to build businesses and companies and I want to do things that are innovative But that's a different level of thinking right? I'm also not the guy that needs someone to lay it out for me I can fucking come up with an idea and make it work

You see what I'm saying? So we got to know where we lie in all these things. And maybe you're not even the fucking franchise entrepreneur. Maybe you're a very strong entrepreneur that doesn't want to wear the stress of the company 24 hours a day, that doesn't want to be on their phone till fucking midnight every night. Like I still am 26 years in. Okay. It's a different fucking life and it's not for everybody. And if it's not for you and you try to do it, it's going to crush your soul, bro So we got to be authentic with where we are what fits us What's gonna make us happy like that guy with the car shop that guy might be happy building one or two cars a year himself

Yeah, right. You know I'm saying yeah, that's right. And that's okay, dude Like I'm not gonna be on here and say everybody's the same and everybody has to go out and try to be a fucking billionaire that's it's not what i'm saying we gotta find the the right area that we are fulfilled in that we can pay for our lives in and then after that it's it's gravy right yeah man i fucking love it man guys and that's a hell of a way to start a monday man yeah all right guys let's go out let's kick some ass this week. We'll see you tomorrow on CTI.