REAL AF with Andy Frisella - Actions Follow Focus, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO108

Episode Date: November 18, 2016

What you focus on throughout your day will become your life. In this episode of The MFCEO Project, Andy Frisella talks about how you use your brain and how your brain controls your attention, your appetites, and ultimately, your actions. Every thought that pulses through your mind has a result; so it is imperative that we control our thoughts and use them to achieve peak performance in every area of life.

I want to be a motherfucking hustler. You better ask somebody. What is up guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy, I'm your host, and I am the motherfucking CEO. Hey guys, if this is your first time listening, this is Friday Fire. Sometimes it's Thursday thunder. Today it's Friday fire. It really just depends on how my week goes. Now, if this is your first time listening, what is the MFCEO? Okay. That stands for motherfucking CEO. Okay. And you have to understand one thing, no matter what you do, no matter who you are, no matter what position you currently hold in life, you are the CEO of you. You are the

entrepreneur of you. And what better way to go through life than to be the motherfucking CEO, have some fucking confidence, have some swagger and learn how to do things with a style and an ability that just stands out from the crowd, okay? That's what you're going to learn here. That's what we're going to talk about here consistently. On Tuesdays, we've got practical lessons, okay? We talk about things that can help with your mindset. We talk about things that can help you sell skills, okay, practical things that you can put in play on how to build a life you want. On Thursdays and sometimes Friday, as in this case, we talk about motivation. We talk about little mind tricks.

Sometimes I'm going to get on and I'm going to tell you about, you know, certain things I do to help me be more productive. Sometimes I'm going to get on and I'm going to punch you right in the fucking eye. And I'm going to tell you, quit being a pussy because that is the ultimate excuse. All right. Most people spend their entire lives totally scared, totally, you know, afraid to even go out and try things. And if you listen to this podcast, you know that I don't buy into that shit. All right. You have to be willing to go out and take a chance. You have to be willing to take steps. You have to be willing to pick up the phone. You have to be willing to send an email. And most

people never even get that far. All right. We're going to talk to you about things that can help you get that far and much, much further. All right, so welcome. We don't charge anything. I'm not going to ask you to buy anything. I'm not going to hawk my fucking, you know, $499 program. That's not what we do here, okay? This is about helping you. This is about bringing people up.

This is about instilling the values of America back into society. Hard work, taking responsibility, taking initiative, owning your shit. All right. Going the extra mile, being a good person. All right. All the things not whining like a little fucking bitch that we seen a lot of the last two weeks on the fucking internet and on the news. All right. That's what we're about. It's not for everybody, but if it's for you, all we ask is that you share with your like-minded friends. So today, if you can't tell, I'm battling a little bit of a cold or something in my throat, so I'm going to try to get through this the best that I can for you guys.

I want to share with you a trick, all right? Something that I have used consistently in my life. And you know, sometimes I failed at using this and it's really hurt me, but I want to talk about focus, okay? I want to talk about achieving a goal in your brain that you're working towards and how what you focus on will actually help you achieve that goal, all right? And I'm going to use my personal fitness journey this year as an example for that. But this can also be used in business. It can be used in relationships. It can be used a lot of different ways.

But I'm going to talk in terms of my personal weight loss fitness journey, okay? I didn't just lose weight. I gained muscle. It's not just about weight loss. It's about body composition,'t just lose weight. I gained muscle. It's not just about weight loss. It's about body composition, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. If you want to learn more about that, you could check out our website, first form.com and we'll do our business over there. But here's the deal guys, what you focus on and what you think about during the day is going to become your life. All right. There is, it's not just

about the quote unquote law of attraction, although it is about that. It's not just about the metaphysical, the quantum physical aspects of what you think about becomes reality, although it is about that too. But what it is more about is how your brain responds to the language that you are actually using internally. For example, when you go on a diet program or you go on a fitness program and you think about all the things that you have to give up to get where you want to go. Your brain does not focus on the end result. It doesn't focus on the awesome physique that you're going to have. It doesn't focus on how fun it is to go in the dressing room and buy clothes that fit. It doesn't focus on how good you're going to feel. It doesn't focus on the energy that you're going to have. It doesn't focus on you not being embarrassed to go

to the fucking swimming pool because you're a fat ass. Okay. It doesn't focus on that, but you know what it does focus on? It focuses on the pizza. I got to give up. It focuses on the French fries. I got to give up. It focuses on the TV time. I got to give up because I'm at the gym. Okay. And when you are focusing on what you have to give up, your brain literally says this, and a lot of you guys can relate to this, you know, fuck, you know, I've got to, I've got to give, give up pizza. And all your brain says is this pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza, pizza, Until you become fucking obsessed with fucking pizza and you break down and you order two 18-inch pizzas with fucking chicken wings, french fries,

and all the other shit that goes with it. You eat the shit, you lay on the couch, and then you wonder why the fuck you just did that. And I know a lot of you listening have done that before. And it goes for any area of life. You've got to speak to yourself in the terms of your focus. All right? You've got to use language internally that helps you move forward.

Okay? We talked last podcast about the power list and about creating momentum and about creating habits. Focus is a huge part of that because when you go along in the beginning of your journey, whatever that journey may be, you are going to naturally focus on the things that you have to give up and you have to recognize that and then you have to actually consciously switch your focus to the things you're going to gain. Okay. When you're focused on the things you're going to gain, like I just mentioned 10 of them about losing weight, you know, going to the pool

and being able to take your shirt off, going to the dressing room and your clothes fitting, you know, feeling good about, you know, speaking in public uh a million other things okay that go along with being fit when you're focused on those things and your your focus is so intense and so strong and your visualization is so in tune with those things you don't want to fucking fuck that up you don't want a cheat meal you don't want pizza you don't want mcdonald's you don't want to go out with your friends and drink beer. That's not what you want because what you want is what you're focusing on and your actions will naturally flow behind that focus and follow that focus up when you focus on the

right things. Your actions will always follow your focus. It's just the way it is, okay? When you focus on what you have to give up, your mind is going to be obsessed with those things. And it's not going to be obsessed with those things like I don't want those things. It's going to be obsessed with those things to the point where it breaks you.

You fall off your program. You lose your momentum. You lose your confidence that comes with that momentum and you're starting from zero, okay? You've got to let these things work for you. You've got to let them take hold of you and push you through. Your actions will always follow your focus. All right. And this goes for business too. You know, when you're starting a business and let's say you're working a job and you have to work at night and you start thinking about, man, I got to give up all my free time with my kids. I've got to give up all my free time with my buddies. I've got to give up this and this and this.

Dude, that business is not going to work because you are obsessed with what you're having to give up. Instead, what you should be focusing on all the time and reminding of yourself on all the time is what you are doing this for, why you are doing this. You look at your kid instead of thinking, oh man, I've got to give up these three hours at night. I am going to provide for that kid to go to a good high school, to a good college. I'm going to take care of them and I am going to provide for that kid to go to a good high school, to a good college. I'm going to take care of them and I'm going to build awesome memories with them because of what I'm doing now. Okay. When you think about, Oh, you know, I've got to get up my time with my buddies. Don't think about them sitting around at the fucking pub table at your

local watering hole, drinking a fucking Budweiser. No. Think about you being on the back of a motherfucking yacht with all your boys having a good time. That's why you're doing this shit. Okay? You've got to focus on the result. You've got to focus on the end goal. You've got to stay focused on what it is you are gaining, not what you are giving up. Remember, your actions will always follow your focus. Okay. This, this doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter if it's training for the fucking tour de France. It doesn't matter if it's weight loss. It doesn't matter if it's building a business. It doesn't matter if it's interpersonal relationships. If you're always

focused on the negatives of your wife or your husband and all the little things that are bad, you're going to fucking hate that person. It's just the way our brains work. So guys, you have to understand the power of focus. All right. I read a long time ago, one of my first books I ever read was by Tony Robbins. And in the book, he uses the example of driving a race car. And I like this example because I think it proves exactly the point. Your car, when you're driving a race car, will go where you look. Okay. So when you start to slide out and you start to look, you start to look and you're sliding towards the wall. They teach you to look at the road, not at the wall because your actions will always follow the, the way that you need to move to get the car back into the road. All right. It's just a natural

reaction. It's the same thing. If you look at the wall, when you're sliding, you're going to fucking slide into the wall. You cannot avoid it because you're going to actually steer the car into the fucking wall. That's a prime real example. It's not a metaphor. It's actually a literal real example that your actions follow your focus. Okay. You have to be disciplined and practicing this skill because that's what it is. It's a skill. Okay. You're going to think to yourself, and the reason I'm doing this podcast is because I want to bring it to your attention. I want you to realize that when you have these thoughts, you know, you're driving down the road and you see McDonald's and you start thinking about the 20 piece nugget and two double cheeseburgers

that you want to get from McDonald's, you have to immediately start thinking, no, I don't want that. What I want is I want to be looking good when it's time to take my shirt off on the fucking boat this summer, or I want to be able to fit in those jeans, or I want to be able to show up in my high school reunion looking great, or I want to just be healthy so I don't fucking kick it at 40 years old. Okay. You've got to immediately recognize when these thoughts of short term creep in and fucking stop them and start thinking about what it is you really want. And what happens guys, it's just like what happens, what we talked about in the last week's podcast, or this week's earlier podcast, I'm sorry, where we talk about momentum, okay? When you create the momentum and the discipline of

doing this in the very beginning, after a few weeks, after a month or two months, you're going to automatically be focused on the result. And these little things that creeped in your mind in the beginning, you know, the, the missing the time with your kids, if you're working on a business or the missing the time here, the sacrifice here, or, you know, the pizza that you used to eat, those things are not even going to be thoughts for you. They're not even going to be in your brain. They're not even going to come in because you're going to be so fucking laser dial focused on what it is you want that your brain only thinks about the actions and only does and produces the actions that will follow that focus. So guys, if you're having trouble sticking to a diet like I have for many years, in the beginning

I said, you know, I failed at this sometimes because I failed to recognize either A, what I really wanted and define that and visualize that the proper way as we talked in the last podcast. Okay. I didn't do that. B, I failed to recognize when the negative thoughts came in and to actually refocus consciously on my end goal, on my end game, on what I really want so that I can stay on track and so it will not be a constant mental battle. And this is what discourages people so much, guys, because people start out on a program, all right, and whether it be anything, they start out on a program. In the very beginning, it's just hard, okay? You're replacing habits that you've had

for a long time. You're doing new things. You are doing things that are hard. But what happens is, is that after you do them for a long enough period of time, and that period of time is not that long, you create new habits, all right? So when you, when you're mentally struggling, you know, let's say you're, you're somebody who's trying to go alcohol or you're trying to give up a food addiction and food addiction is a real thing. Okay. Try being fucking, you know, the, the funny thing I try to explain to people about food addiction is this, and a lot of people don't get it is that, you is that with alcohol and cigarettes, you can quit cold turkey. All right? Is it painful? Is it hard? Yeah. But what if to survive, you just had to drink a little

bit of alcohol every day, or you just had to smoke a little bit of cigarettes because you had to do it to survive? That's why food addiction is so fucking hard for people because they've got to actually eat and do the things that they're addicted to to actually survive. And it's a very, very real and very, very hard thing for people to do. So if you're one of these people or you're trying to do anything, just remember that you can still change the habits that you've created. It just takes discipline in the beginning. All right. Once you get three, four, five, six, seven weeks in these thoughts and these these wants and these things that creep in your mind to where they're forcing you to be in agony because you want something so bad, they're not going to be there.

And progress is going to get easier. All right. And after two or three months, five months, it's going to be fucking automatic. All you have to do is stick it through in the beginning. And like I said, and I keep saying this goes for everything. It goes for business. It goes for physique. It goes for mental health. It goes for relationships. You've got to be able to understand and stick with all of this in order for the new habits to take place. Actions will always follow your focus. If you're going to take one thing away from this,

understand that the way the world works is that what you focus on will become a reality. It will become a reality because your actions will follow it. It will become a reality because your unconscious actions will follow it. It will become a reality because the universe plays a huge role in lining it up for you to hit a fucking home run when you focus on the right shit. Think about all the times that you lose your focus. You spend an hour on Facebook here. You spend two hours on Instagram there. You spend another hour trying to create some funny fucking Snapchat so people laugh at you. All right. You read this post about so-and-so here. You get caught up in this person's drama here. Dude, what the fuck are you doing? You're spending all this energy and all this time on things that do not fucking matter, which is disrupting your focus. Learn to be focused. Learn to be disciplined about being

focused. Learn to block out these instant gratification thoughts for the delay gratification thoughts. Learn to recognize when those thoughts come in that your job is to put a mental block up and refocus on the long term. Right? It's hard in the beginning. It gets easier. And eventually it becomes automatic. All right? Focus on the shit you want and forget about the shit you don't want.