REAL AF with Andy Frisella - Choice + Action = Outcome, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO95

Episode Date: September 20, 2016

Most people exist as a byproduct of their environment. What does it take to create a life in which you can control your environment? How do you make yourself significant enough to make an impact, whether in business or all of life?  In short, what do you need to do to get where you want to be? In this episode of the MFCEO Project, Andy Frisella is joined by Pejman Ghadimi, founder of Secret Entourage and the author of the bestselling book, Third Circle Theory.

I want to be a motherfucking hustler. You better ask somebody. What is up guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy, I'm your host, and I am the motherfucking CEO. Guys, if this is your first time listening, what is a motherfucking CEO? Well, let me tell you something. You don't have to own a business. You don't have to be an entrepreneur, but you do have to understand that you are always, always, always the CEO of your life. And why do we say motherfucking CEO?

Because what fun is going through life without some swagger and some confidence and being a bad motherfucker? It's just a good time. I'm here with my co-host von kohler the pastor of disaster what's up my man what's going on andy how you been buddy i'm doing good man you know i was thinking about the mfceo and being a motherfucking man and one time i was at this bar and this girl came up to me and asked me are you von the impaler i said fuck yeah and what you do i was like the fucking man i'm the m MF CEO of the Vaughn the Impaler.

And what kind of car do you drive? A Toyota Yaris or something. I don't even know. It's so badass. I don't even know, man. All right, guys. So as we know, that's not Vaughn. But a lot of you guys have requested after our sales podcast that we bring back my brother on the podcast.

Vaughn is out sick. He's got strep throat. So we have Sal sitting in his chair. I don't know how he's going to contribute. I don't either. I'm sitting here. I'm confused. I'm like, all right, what does Vaughn actually do?

Yeah. Vaughn. He sits there and says, Vaughn's going to edit me out of his own podcast. You don't even earned your way in this podcast. I edited him. That's between you and Vaughn. I've also got a very, very, very special guest that I've

spoken about many times in the podcast. Pejaman Gadimi, my good friend PJ from Secret Entourage. Also the author of The Third Circle Theory, which you guys know I talk about a lot. What's going on, my man? What's up, man? It's good to be back. Yeah, this is... Good conversation with you's up, man? It's good to be back. Yeah, this is... To be engaging in a good conversation with you guys today.

Yeah, it's going to be awesome. For those of you guys that haven't heard of PJ before, you guys, he is one of the most intelligent people that I personally know in life. Very, very, very critical thinker, very deep thinker. We're going to talk about some things that are very important to entrepreneurship today. You guys know I highly recommend his book, The Third Circle Theory. I feel like it's probably the only book I've read that can get somebody who is thinking inside the box to look outside their box. And you guys have to understand that learning to set new limits or expectations for yourself is always going to be a part of progressing.

It's not going to be winning inside the game that you think is the game. There's more game out there and it's hard to explain exactly what you can get from this book without you reading it, which is why I recommend it so much. And I'm not just saying that because you're sitting here. I say this all the time. Yeah. So first off, thanks for, you know, calling me the smartest people, you know, that's really awesome. But, you know, I think you said it best. It's hard to experience without actually reading it. Right. But it's really about, you know, creating an environment where you're not only able to not be a byproduct of your environment, but be an actual, like, person controlling the environment.

Right. To do what you need it to do to get where you need to get in life. Yeah, sure. But what you really, really need to get out of just this idea of the book, The Third Circle Theory, is understanding how little as a human being the world revolves around us and how to make ourselves significant enough to create an impact big enough in life

so that we can shift the way things work in the world. I think so many people miss the note when they think of business, entrepreneurship, and everything in between, and it's always about what can I do to make some money? Well, I hear you talk about that all the time, about people getting confused about losing their focus and just being focused on the money,

not on the purpose or the passion. And I think it's such a broad thing to talk about. It's so easy to say well you have to do things you love in life you have to do all that crap right and people hear that and they're like what the fuck does that mean exactly like why don't you sit on the couch and watch fucking game of thrones and there's so many things like you know who do you surround yourself with in life matters you've heard all of those quotes right like there's so many things out there that are focused around just like these these sayings and these quotes and

everything. And there is so much of it out there that people get confused. And with this book, my intention was to lay it out in a manner that is self-reflective so that the book's not about my life, but rather everybody at any stage of the game, regardless that they're like you, super successful, have owned a company, you know, multiple companies growing and are leading many others to successful, you know, businesses themselves, or that there's someone who's just starting up today, confused, or someone that's, you know, built a billion dollar business and is known worldwide. Regardless of where you are, this book allows you to understand either how you've progressed to get there, or what's left to get to. So it almost acts as a map into the

human psyche of what happens as the evolution of an entrepreneur from the day of birth to the day of finding your purpose. And the funny thing from that is a lot of people are like, well, you know, how do you know what my purpose is? Like, what are you, like a psychic? You can't know what I do or like what's going to. and the reality is nobody can ever know your purpose by yourself, right? Like you kind of think you know your purpose. You find something you want to hang on to and you go kill for it, or you believe in it more than yourself, so you keep going forward. And I think the essence here is that if people are purposeful, and me and you had this conversation earlier, you know, when we talked about a colleague of ours,

a friend, you know, that kind of was doing that. And if you don't have purpose in everything you do, then you're very limited by your environment. You're limited by everything around you all the time and by the rules of the game and how things work, et cetera. But when you get a sense of purpose and you become purposeful, even if there's no validation

if that purpose is real or not, then you become purposeful, even if there's no validation if that purpose is real or not, then you become limitless in your nature. And that's when real progress happens. That's when you can really create change in the world out there. Right. Dude, I thought it was really cool. PJ is a huge car fanatic, as am I, as you guys know. We were talking about cars earlier. And every time you drive an exotic car, you're going to get people that come up to you and they're going to say things like, oh, man, that's so awesome. Or, you know, that's so cool. One day I'm going to have a car like that. I guarantee it.

And they start trying to like, you know, almost like validate themselves. Like, dude, I'm going to be there one day, which is great. I love the drive. I love the ambition. I love the excitement. But we talked about this earlier and I want you to tell what you ask people whenever they say that, um, in terms of to try to bring the focus out of where their focus should be versus, versus, uh, you know, hey, I just want this thing. Because so many people now, especially with the internet, you know, we're inundated with flash, right?

And I'm guilty of it too, man. I post my cars, I post the rewards. But there's nothing wrong with that. That's okay. No, no, no, there's not. But I always try to be very mindful of to teach a lesson with that post. Because I don't want to be the guy who's just saying,

oh, I'm a fucking baller. Look at my shit. I want to be the person that says, hey, here is what I've earned and what can happen if you follow this lesson or here's a story about this or this and try to teach with those tools. But you brought up such a cool point earlier

that I thought I think you should talk about. Yeah, no, I think what you're talking about is when I brought up, like, the thing that happens a lot to me, I'm sure it happens to you, which anyone who owns an exotic car gets approached all the time by other people who want to own an exotic car or own something of similar value. Regardless that it's their passion for cars or they want to show off or status thing. Everybody wants the good life, right? So everybody has this thing to say, oh, you know, I'm working towards my Lamborghini. I'm going to have this Ferrari by this age, or I'm going to be super successful. I'm going to be, let's use the more broad one. I want to be a millionaire by 30. I think that one is like every 20 year old is like by 30, I'm going to be a millionaire. And I think that's like everybody's first goal in life is like to be a millionaire and i think that's like everybody's like first goal in

life is like to be a millionaire because that word resonates with you when you're young but you know one of the things that that happens to me when i'm driving my car and like people come up to me the car is like mark my words my next car will be a lamborghini and usually i tell them i'm gonna bet everything you we can put a bet like thousand bucks five grand that you're never gonna get a lamborghini and they're like you're such an asshole. Like, what? Why? You don't even know me. Like, you don't know my dreams. Yeah. Like, you're such a dick. Like, you're not even trying to help me. Like, why would you think that? Right. Right. So first off, I say, well, first off, you didn't believe you would because the first thing you said was mark my words. I don't need to mark your words. If you believe it, just go do it. Right. Why you

need me to validate what you can do for yourself. right? So that's contradictory to what you even believe to begin with. But I was like, the reason I'm gonna bet against you is because owning a Lamborghini, being a millionaire by 30, having a big house, having a private jet, all of that shit, it's all a byproduct of work. Like it's the reward for the work. So when you're setting a goal to earn a reward,

well it's only as good as your motivation to get that reward which is going to go to shit real quick right meaning eventually things are going to come up something's going to happen to you and you're going to be like fuck my life like it's done you know like i just mean anything yeah exactly like i don't want this or like suddenly you get married you get kids and you're like oh my you know kid is my earth and you know i want a minivan now right yeah i don't I don't, I don't want money anymore. Right. Like, so priorities change. And so what happens is I tell people, I'm like, the day I'll believe someone that comes up to me and says, you know, I'll have a Lamborghini by 30 or I'll be a millionaire is the day when they come up and

instead give me a goal that is real, such as, you know, if they would have said something like, hey, you know what? By 30, I want to be the number one chef in Chicago. By 25, I want to be the number one supplement company in Missouri. But, you know, next year, I want to have the, I want to be the guy that has 6,000 clients cutting hair in Boca Raton. You know, it doesn't matter. But if the goal is real, meaning if the goal is more than just the reward, right? Like it's not just what you're going to attain by doing the goal is real meaning if the goal is more than just the reward thing right like it's not just what you're going to attain by doing the goal because i guarantee that all three of those people i just mentioned even though none of them said they would want a lamborghini or get a lamborghini i'm sure at some point they do want one or they want that successful life everybody

has a lamborghini it doesn't have to be yeah exactly and so when they get it when the number one chef, you know, in Chicago, when they become the number one supplement company in Missouri, I guarantee you that guy, whoever he is, can afford to buy his so-called Lamborghini. based upon just like what you're going to accomplish in the work and it's focused on the work, then it's very likely that you're gonna find a process, have some trial and error, you're gonna go through the motion, and even if you don't reach it by the same day you have it in mind, you're still gonna be on a path to get there. That's right.

So you're more likely, like 80% more likely to actually meet that goal than the guy that says, I just want that and mark my words in eight years without a fucking clue what I'm going to do, I'm just going to have that because it's either going to magically appear or I'm going to win the lottery if all else fails. Exactly. Exactly.

So that shit doesn't work. And that's why I usually tell people, that's why they don't fucking get anywhere because they're so focused on the rewards and they're not so much focused on the actual talent they're building within themselves, the skills, the confidence're not so much focused on the actual talent they're building within themselves, the skills, right? The confidence they build themselves, the work they do, which leads, the experience leads to more talent, more skill, more work, and eventually this domino effect, right? Like you're increasing your worth ultimately. So when you increase your worth, it becomes worth enough to be able to take a partial point of that worth and say,

I'm going to buy a Lamborghini with that. Exactly. And that is such a huge point, especially for you younger people who are... Because guys, look, the internet will ruin your fucking mind when it comes to expectations. You are seeing the highlight reel of people's lives and then they're turning around. A lot of people are turning around and trying to sell you that dream for them to make more money. And you have to be smart enough to see through those things. So many younger people I see, and if you're older, it's okay too,

because the amount of time it takes to Become great at things as far less because of the our ability to communicate quickly now internet text YouTube all the shit but you have to be Focused like like this like people will put a picture of a Lamborghini up on their wall Like I did and then they'll say okay I'm gonna deconstruct that goal for me to deconstruct that goal. I've got to make X amount of dollars and I've got to make X amount of dollars this amount this many years in a row to afford this.

And they're going to say, yeah, I deconstructed my goals. I have this plan. I got it. But that's not really a fucking plan, guys. A plan would be when you start. Sal started working at like J&J. How much did you know about fucking hernia shit i didn't know anything right so i'm on the sideline here just watching right observing but in my head i i my advice or where so you didn't know anything right no shit okay so

i took the job your goal your goal wasn't like hey i'm gonna fucking make a trillion dollars your goal was i'm gonna go out and i'm to be the best fucking hernia rep that I can be. And I'm going to meet every doctor I've got to meet. I'm going to shake every hand I've got to shake. I'm going to connect with every single person. I'm going to build every relationship. And what happened? He became number one in the fucking world.

I had a little bit of success in doing that. So when I look at my driver, or where you're referencing this, right. For, for me, you have to focus on being the best in what you want to do. So instead of like, I don't, and Andrew knows, I don't focus on material things. I just, it's never been me. I'm just not wired that way. I do that. I do enjoy them. And I really do love that part, you know, no, but he plays for the win. I do. I will smash your fucking face in. Yeah. And that's like, so when I go to the national sales convention on, uh, when I was at J and J and you go and they have hernia rep of the

year, I seriously look at that motherfucker in the face that I got you. Yeah. That's what I think. I think that today, dude, I think that I saw that I saw a quote today by Muhammad Ali that said, I, I know I'm the best. You all just don't know it yet. You haven't figured it out. Yeah. And like, that's the attitude that, you know, you take into things. But the point of the focus is that, you know, so many people get caught up in the prize that they don't realize that that's not, that's just a byproduct, man. It's just, it's not, it's not. It's not even the good shit.

It's the proverbial prize. Yes. Because the real prize is the win. Yeah, and the real prize is becoming who you are meant to become and fulfilling that potential. And this is what's interesting, and I'll go back, because I'm a listener a lot of times. You look at when you talk about your social media

and you put that shit on social media. For $12.99, you can buy my book, and I'll show you how this works, right? But the reason you don't get any hatred about your social media and you put that shit on social media, you know, for 1299, you can buy my book and I'll show you how this works. Right. But the reason that you don't get any hatred on your social media and the reason you get a lot of engagement is because you do teach lessons. You know what I mean? You tell the story that, Hey, listen, it's been a long fucking journey. These are prizes. You would sell any one of your cars to keep the business afloat today. You know what I'm saying? Like, Hey, where are we going? Let's wipe them off the table because they're in, in, in hindsight, when you think small picture, like your book, when you think small picture, those cars are big picture, that's your prize.

When in reality, when you're big picture, they don't mean shit. Because your eyes on the wind. Well, you go through phases. We talked about this earlier. Yeah, exactly. Like, I mean, one of the things, one of the reasons why a lot of people ask me, they're like, do you consider yourself an entrepreneur? And even my own video guy asked me this at lunch.

And it's like, I really didn't consider myself an entrepreneur except for the last three years of my life. And they're like, well, you had another business that did 40 million in revenue. That's a big deal. You know, to a lot of people, that'd be considered an entrepreneur. And I was like, nope, I was a business owner.

My goal was to make money and I did just that. As a business owner, your goal is to create revenue and profit. And I did really well. And I did, I was a great business owner. And then they're like, well, but after that, you help people with this training and leadership program. I was like, yeah, but that's still a business again.

I traded that. I traded my programs for money. So again, another aspect of business again. But to me anyways, when you think about the whole scope of entrepreneurship and everything, it's really about creating innovation, change, and growth. Like changing the way people see things, the way they innovate, not just building a business, it's got to be much more than that, it's got to be innovating an industry, changing the direction of it, like really creating the change you're capable of doing, and one of the things that, you know,

you have the person you become along the way, like regardless that it's in business or in entrepreneurship, you know, is a person that starts that it's in business or in entrepreneurship, you know, is a person that starts realizing just like I did, you know, when I accumulated all this money from all these businesses, is that even though I had all these cars, I had all these things, you know, to get back to this point, was at the end of the day, I was like, what if I died tomorrow? You know, everybody in town, I used to live in Northern Virginia, in Washington, D.C., I had all these exotic cars, nobody else had them, so I was kind of the big deal. You know, people like gave a shit, because I showed up.

But then I started realizing, I was like, what if I die tomorrow, then I'm only as good as until the next guy shows up with cooler cars, and no one will give a shit, right? You don't even have to die for that. Right, exactly, like I mean someone with a better car will show up, and people will be like, that guy's cooler than fucking PJ.

Like when I go to Jay Gilbert's, and then Andrew pulls up behind me. Yeah, exactly. It's the same. They don't look at mine anymore. But the reality was I realized that, you know,

my greatest strength was always talent management, you know, and it was always growing, fostering talent during my banking days, my earlier years. And so I figured,

I said the best way, the people that are going to remember me the most are the people whose careers I've built, the people who I gave chances to that nobody else would, the people that I've taught how to be better, you know, in their day-to-day lives,

and as a result now have more meaningful lives and are able to contribute and do the same for others. So I thought, I told myself that I can't really have been as successful as I can without having created a real legacy that fostered around more than just money. And I mean, think about like the idea of money in essence is a man-made creation, right? Like it is something as simple that they have created in a society. Every society has their own form of money

that keeps score of what things are worth to make it an even level playing field. It's the scoreboard. Yeah, exactly. It's what it is. And the more of it you have, the more leverage you have, right? But can our entire existence, even previous to money existing,

really be with the purpose of accumulating as much money as we can during this lifetime? Think about it this way. Could it be that our entire existence should be focused around the idea of just accumulating money, like, which is a man-made creation, which previous to money, what were people accumulating? You know, like, what was the goal then, right? And what is the goal once you have all this money? Like, is there really purpose behind money? You know, like, is it leverage? Yes, because we live in society and you can't master society without playing by its rules, right? Like, you have to learn how to play by the rules.

You have to earn your voice. But what happens past that? And this was the essence for me of like this whole idea of third circle. I was like, it has, there has to be more to life. There has to be this element of limitless possibilities, push and getting to that next level. But what does that mean? It's so abstract, you know? And so that's when came the idea of like really breaking down how life works into three circles for my book, which was the mastery of like really breaking down how life works into three circles from my book, which was the mastery of circumstance, which whatever circumstance we're born in,

it is what it is. You know, we have to learn to control our environment. The mastery of society, which is the second circle, and then the mastery of life, which is the third circle. You know, like just teaching people that life and society, while they have a lot of similarities and one lives within the other, it's still different things. So having a mastery of just understanding money business and everything does not mean you have

mastered the essence of living out your fullest potential and i think so many young people especially when they're young and they see your instagram and they is they see like these cars they get excited i do it on my instagram too you know i post like really cool pictures of cars whatever i try to create relatable content to people i don't do it as much as you do. You really have your story really resonate as well with people. But for me, I think if this essence says you can't change people to look past it without showing them these rewards. Oh, you've got to get their attention.

Exactly. It's a fucking fishing lure. Yeah, exactly. And the reason I even created Secret Entourage was because the cartoon characters are using these fake rented Gallardos and bullshit cars and pretending to have money, right? The cartoon characters. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I fucking love it. I love fucking cartoon characters.

At first in my head, I thought, what do you mean cartoon characters? You know what? I knew exactly what he meant. I'm dying, dude. The cartoons use that shit, right? They get out there and they're like, listen, you want a life like this? You want this and that? And I'm like, dude. The cartoons use that shit, right? Like they get out there and they're like, listen, you know, you want a life like this. You want this and that. And I'm like, okay, like, okay, great.

Like now what? You know, like what the fuck? Like what happens next, right? And they're showing their shitty, garbage, average base stuff that people go crazy for, right? Like who goes crazy for a 2004 Gallardo that costs like 80 grand? People don't know any better. People don't know, right? Like they see it and they're like, he's got a Lamborghini. And their own dad has an S-Class in the garage that costs more, you know grand. People don't know any better. People don't know, right? They see it and they're like, he's got a Lamborghini.

And their own dad has an S-Class in the garage that costs more, and they don't know the difference. So they're like, that's incredible. That makes sense, right? So you can't take their attention and say, hey guys, stop looking at all this, focus on the work. Because that's boring as shit. Yeah, and it doesn't sound sexy.

Exactly, and it won't make them pay attention to the caption, right? So in order to make them pay attention to what you. Right. Like, so in order to make them pay attention to what you're saying, you have to get their attention in that way. And I mean, my whole idea with Secret Entrepreneurs

was why don't I bring people like Andy forward? You know, that people that previously were not as known, right? Like, and who are growing in the business world. Why don't I bring them together

and have them show real success? Right. Not having show like rented cars or old shit that nobody cares about but like real stuff and then sell my info program exactly like people who have really done stuff that is showing that it is not a means to getting more stuff it is the byproduct of years of work and tenacity and sacrifice and you asked me earlier you know what what i thought the the

basis of our success has been, and I told you that I thought it was culture. And you can invent a million products, you could sell a million info products, you could do this, that, whatever, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. But here, at the end of the day, the amount of success you create is gonna be in proportion to the amount of value that you provide people, not just your customers, people.

And I got asked uh and i get asked all the time how do you get so many great employees well we don't just pick them off the fucking great employee tree and put them in a fucking play you know how the fuck do you think we get them i'm gonna use that line great yeah i mean dude that people will dude it's right next to the money tree no they're in theitimate successful people will fucking ask me that. And I'm looking at them like, dude, are you fucking brain damaged? Like, how the fuck do you think we get them? Well, you think I'm good at like recruiting?

No, I'm good at making people perform and caring because I fucking care about them first. And we're talking about legacy here. You know, when you talk about people won't remember you for driving cars, but how, how do I create something that people will remember me for? Well, when, when you create a situation or a job or a career for somebody to where they're going to tell their grandkids, Hey, you know, I had this wonderful mentor. I had this wonderful boss that I used to work for. I worked for, I built a career in this company. Dude, that's real shit.

That's affecting lives beyond, you know, my bank account or beyond driving a nice car. You're talking about legacy. And so many people get caught up in what's in it for them that they forget about the whole basis of business is about what can you do for someone else. Well, we remember for the impact we make on others. That's right. But what I'm trying to tie together here for these guys is because people are like, oh, well, it's easy to talk about legacy and impact when you fucking have money.

Well, how the fuck did you think it came here? Well, it started from somewhere, right? It didn't always start with money,'t always start with money too no no but i'm saying it starts with the value you provide other people it starts with the solutions that you provide people it starts with the products that you create that help people it starts with giving them time it starts with giving them hope it starts with giving them an idea that they can be greater than what they are or many different ways that you can, and I summarize it as help people, but there's so many ways that you could provide value with people and you have to give so much of that to get in return. And that's where I think people get their focus screwed up in business.

And we see it online all the time now People who call the action 30 times a fucking day. Well, dude, it's like the boy who cried wolf If you if all you do is call to action and you think you're gonna make a lot of money People are gonna ignore you you're not gonna be relevant and as an entrepreneur you have to you have to mold people you have To help people you have to make people better and have to help people, you have to make people better, and in return, there will be some, if you're intelligent, you'll be able to connect a way for the money to come back to you. You have to facilitate change, which is the essence of entrepreneurship. And I think one of the things I say a lot, and I kind of hinted on this earlier, I think

you can correct me if I'm wrong, but I think a lot of people that listen to this are also younger, and they aspire to be great. They look up to you as a leader, like someone who's done something great. And they look up to all of your team as individuals who are kind of living a meaningful, passionate life and are all wanting to be successful. And I think two of the biggest things that come up for me is the first one I'm sure they ask you all the time. Where do I start? How do I get started? 100%. Like all the time. me is the first one. I'm sure they ask you all the time. Where do I start? How do I get started? Right.

100%. Like all the time. Like, how do I, I don't have an idea. I'm sure you've heard it too. So, right.

Like everybody, all those. Dude, I'm an entrepreneur at heart, but I don't know how to start. Well, if you're an entrepreneur at heart, you already be fucking doing shit.

So first off, I think the big thing here, and you know, I'm, I'm always true to my own brand, which is always about differentiating the difference between business and entrepreneurship for people. And I think it's key to understand that needs, people have needs. And when you provide that need or they have wants and you provide that want to them, you're facilitating a transaction.

That's called building a business. Like you're facilitating something people need and want. That's right when you're an entrepreneur though people have problems that have non-existing solutions and you're creating the solutions for them that journey is a lot easier than is a lot harder i'm sorry than facilitating just a transaction right from a need want and then fulfilling it now you could be a restaurant that's a business you're like yeah i'm starting a restaurant there is no fast food restaurant here in this town. I'm facilitating a need or want.

I'm bringing it to town, right? You're not an entrepreneur for that shit. That's not entrepreneurial. That's just a dude that sets a restaurant. No, you're taking a plan that exists and you're following it. And you're giving it to people. And it has a process, right? It's black and white.

On the other side, though, if you're an entrepreneur, you're solving your real problems that don't have solutions, meaning the journey is going to be longer. It's going to be a lot of trial and errors. You're going to go down paths you don't understand. There is no money in the early stages of that path. But once you do discover the road, obviously you're the first one to the reward, right? So you're the first one there saying, everybody came on this path. I guided them the right place. I created a solution. Now I'm an entrepreneur. You're not facilitated that change. And a lot of people always tell me, they say, well, I get it. I want to be an entrepreneur or in business, whatever. So how do I get started? What do I do today, right now? Like anyone listening to this, what do you do right this moment? If you don't know where to go or what to do, if you want to be like Andy, if you want to be like anyone else out there that's doing big

things, changing the world or just facilitating business, where do you get started right now? Real simple, because every business idea, like where do ideas come from? That's, I think, the easiest thing we can kind of break down for people right now on this podcast so they can really take something back from this and do it right away. Imagine a triangle, right? Imagine a triangle, and at the peak of it, put confidence. On the other side, put love. And on the other side, put skill. The byproduct of these three things creates an idea that is sustainable and that can grow and that you are the person to bring to life. So if you identify things you love, you list them out. You identify things you have

confidence in and you identify skills you have, then that is whatever idea falls within the tree. It is a sustainable idea that you are in a right position to take on. Because it's like me saying I want to put space, I want to create another SpaceX. Well, I'm not the type of

entrepreneur or person who has the resources, the skill, the love, or anything to be in the space program. So it isn't a fit for me, even though it might be the greatest idea ever, right? So in this little triangle, you have this kind of idea forming, and now you have these three characteristics that can tell you, do I love this? Am I confident about it? And do I have the skills? Or can I attain the skills? Or can I find the skills to bring this idea to life, right? What is the evolution of this idea? Because that gives you an idea that is a

business. What is the evolution of that? Where does the entrepreneur come in? What is the evolution of love? Passion. What is the evolution of confidence? Belief. What is the evolution of skill? Talent. So when a skill is practiced enough and you become really good at it naturally good at it that's your competitive advantage when you've loved something enough that you've taken enough action through these skills you've grown passion for it and what happens when you have confidence above and beyond the ordinary state of just knowing something but without knowing you just believe beyond anything that that shit is going to happen. That's belief.

And when the degree happens, that gives birth to the entrepreneur within the person. That's the fire that comes out, you know, that says, like, I don't give a shit. This is going to happen. Doesn't matter what the fuck it takes. Doesn't matter. I'm going to sleep in a car on the floor, get hit by rain. I don't give a shit. And I know this is an entrepreneurial podcast, but that's also not just the equation for an entrepreneur.

I mean, I'm a key piece in a small business that I'm not the entrepreneur of, right? But an entrepreneur doesn't mean you have to be the star of it, right? You're entrepreneurial within the business. That's right. Entrepreneur mindset is not – yeah, it's not – not you don't have to own a business to be an entrepreneur And that's my point like right when you talk to a lifestyle man, right? But I'm saying when you talk about where these people start right like where do I start? Well? You need to build a team

You know what I mean when you or you could be a puzzle to that team But those those skills you speak of when you talk about talent and you talk about courage and you talk about heart and you talk about possessing and harnessing them, you can have a role inside a business to be able to drive your value. But that's your choice, right? There's no right or wrong. See, that's another thing I really believe big time is that everything in life is choice-driven. Nothing is right or wrong. So if you look at everything as like, oh, this is the right path or the wrong path, that doesn't work. You have to look at everything as like, oh this is the right path or the wrong path, that doesn't work.

You have to look at everything as, this is a path I'm choosing. So one of the things I say in the book is, if you look at everything, most poor people, or I call them poor people, forgive me for saying that, but I call them unsuccessful people, poor minded people, think of life as a choice equal an outcome.

Oh I made a good choice in my life, it made me a lot of money. Oh I got married, it was a great choice. I got divorced, from my life. It was bad, right? Whatever that is. But successful people look at it as I made a choice. Then let me add actions to that choice. So choice plus action equals outcome. So now they're reverting the choice to themselves, their control, because they're saying their actions after the choice dictated the outcome. So if you take a choice and you add your particular actions behind it, now you control the outcome. But when you just believe that a choice led to an outcome,

you know, and you look at it that way, either forward or backward, you're then taking away the control and saying just, it was the choice that led to the bad outcome. And so what I'm trying to say here is that no matter, when I was saying how do you get started, you can look at something as simple as what we talked about where you think about skills, you think about confidence,

you think about love, and you can list those things. What is the one thing that maybe meets the three criteria to get started? The evolution of that, what you talk about, you don't have to be the key player, you can be within a business, that's a choice in every way possible. You know, you can say you have the capacity to start a business.

You can still choose to say, I have a lot of weight and things I can do here within this business to really help facilitate this change, which I believe, you know, Andy's doing here with First Form. And I'm part of that. And I'm going to help facilitate it faster, easier, and better. There is no such thing as, like, again, a right choice or wrong choice. This is based on your triangle. You know, this is where you feel your greatest impact is at the moment. And it's true for now, maybe in the next five years and maybe in 10 years, another piece of that triangle, right? Allows you to like evolve as an individual even further. So this is actually a really cool segue because you actually touched on something that I wanted to talk about that I get a lot of.

Okay. And I, I address this a lot. Um, the mentality difference between people who are successful versus the mentality difference, people who really struggle, um, versus the mentality difference, people who really struggle, in terms of how successful people believe that it is an equation, right?

It's work, time, skill, all mashed together. And if I do these things, the outcome will be there. They believe that. Unsuccessful people have this idea where they look at a crowd of people and they think that some success fairy is going to fly out of the sky you know what i'm saying and like touch you and then touch you but not touch this guy even though he's doing the exact things that they need to happen to be successful what's your opinion on the difference between that mindset and because i can remember thinking when i was a younger person, like when I was, you know, because I've been an entrepreneur since I was young, eight years old, nine years old, 10 years old.

I've just been that kind of mind. As I can remember thinking like, man, I wonder if I'm going to be one of these people who gets to drive a Lamborghini, or I wonder if I'm going to be one of these people who gets to be successful, or I wonder if the universe is going to let me be this, you know? And I can remember thinking that and then going through the process and

then looking back and being like, dude, I had nothing to do with that. It was just, you do this, you do this, you do this, and then this happens.

So what would you say to somebody who's young right now who has doubts that that's the truth? Don't be a victim of anything. I think that's the main thing is a lot of unsuccessful people or people who want success and haven't reached it yet, typically are a victim of their environment, meaning they look for every reason why they're not being chosen right you know why that hasn't happened to them right why this isn't something they love to do right that moment they're like oh man i don't love my job right like oh my god i gotta quit right now i don't love school fuck school right like that's that's how usually popular shit right now it's like the victim right nobody fucking likes school you. You're always a victim of your environment

and everything happening around you. Like you can't be successful because, sorry, you can't be successful because you typically focus so much on everything going on around you rather than the actions you're taking to bring it to like taking to bring whatever you want to do to life. So people are always like, well, you dropped out of school. And I'm like, yeah,

I left school. But it wasn't because I was trying to figure out what I wanted to do. So I left school and then sat on my ass for six months. I had a job that was paying me 60, 70K a year. So I was already doing well, better than I would have coming out of school. I was willing to spend seven times more time at work to make up for the time I wasn't in school. And I understood that I was gonna have to also self-educate myself to make up for what I'm not receiving in school.

So I left school with belief, tenacity, and the work in place, right? And I agreed that I was gonna do more work for what i was going to miss so you know i think being just not being a victim of what's going on like what if you can't be successful because you're in a town that doesn't have i think gary v which is funny like you brought him up earlier he said something to a guy that was like well i want to sell weed in my town but it's illegal and he's like well fucking move yeah go somewhere yeah that's what you want

to do you know like you can't just sit on your ass and be like, in my house, this isn't happening. So therefore, there's no way I can do anything about it. And I'm just going to sit there and look at my life and be like, fuck. I mean, I think of it in a very life-driven way as well, which is even for myself, I'm very driven. I always go after things I want. I never settle for no. Meaning like, if I see a door's closed, I find a way around it but i don't look at it as it's not happening

i'm like maybe it's not happening right now but that shit's gonna happen because i'm gonna make it happen not only do you look at it as not i mean and tell me if you if i'm wrong about this but when i see a door closed for me i don't even look at it as a negative at all i look at it like hey dude i just learned this from that and i'm going to use that now right exactly so i turn right i turn what other people would say is a or even use as an excuse to quit into a fucking asset to move forward you know exactly that's exactly what i mean so if you focus your effort on just on the work and the things you can do not the things that are not going for you. And you keep making moves, even if they're not perfect, you know, like, even if they're not,

like the best moves that are going to lead to every little thing you want, but it's just a move forward, right? Well, it's better to move forward than to stay stagnant. So if you're making progress, you're eventually going to get through that door. And that's the key. And I think the progress part is what a lot of people miss because the progress could be one month, one year, 10 years. But the progress needs to take place in order for the person to advance. That's right. That's right, man. I agree 100%. I think that people i think you're i think you hit a spot on man i think people will look for any excuse they could possibly find for it to not be quote unquote for them you know what i mean so i can you know school like the popular thing is now like you said oh i don't love school or i

don't love my job well fucking nobody loves school all the time. Nobody certainly loves their job all the time. I don't fucking love this job all the time, but I know where I need to go and I know what I need to do to get where we need to go. So I fucking do it even when I don't feel like it, you know? And I feel like there is a level.

Some now Gary argues with me on this because he believes that there's the millennial thing has always been there like it's always been you know the young uh he calls it old white man talk like uh you know i went to school both ways uphill in the snow right and every generation has the the older generation looks at the younger generation and says they're fucking lazy or they're they're entitled or they or they don't appreciate shit. And he's got a point to that at some level. But I do think that we are at a point where technology has become such a huge part of our lives

and the messages of this easy success has mixed with also the idea that people are owed something for just being born to create a situation where we do have people who aren't willing to fucking do the work. I mean, there's lazy. I mean, my license plate on my Lamborghini says not lazy. Right. Yeah. Mine says do work. So one way or another, lazy is definitely part of the equation. Right. Like that's part of the problem more than anything else is the work ethic isn't there. Right.

That's, I think no matter what you look, how you look at it, which country, there's always that pool of people. Right. That just don't want to do anything. Agreed. And everybody's always worried about the maximum reward for their work. For the minimum effort. Right, right, exactly. So you hear people like

really young they always tell me they're like i've i've saved 10k how can i make my money work for me like how can i invest my money to make it make money for me and i look at them and i'm like what are you doing to make money right now and they're like well no that's why i'm asking you what can my money do to make money for me i'm like why are you fucking expecting your money to make money from you when you're not willing to work to make money for yourself? Dude, it's – Like, I don't understand. Like, how are you thinking of investing money to make money, right?

You want your money to work, but you don't want to do the work. What the fuck? Go to work. Like, go to work. Save more money. Well, keep doing the shit that made you the 10 grand. Exactly. And be great at it.

It's working. Eventually, you're going to get 20, 30, 50, and 100 grand. Dude, and that's where people get their ass kicked in because they are always looking for that easier way instead of the way that works well well people i think want big money quickly yeah and i think and i think the problem is they don't understand the idea of compounding knowledge so this is where people make this mistake where they look at compounding money you know they understand this interest but they don't look at the power of compounding their experiences their knowledge and everything.

And the value that brings back in terms of money in the long term, you know, so they look at it as I'm doing this and I'm making X amount of money. How can I do what do I need to do to make X amount or, you know, Y amount of money? They don't look at it as who I'm becoming along the way is worth so much more money to everybody else. Right. Because I'm becoming so talented at what I do that everybody's dying to pay me to do it for them. So therefore, I want to make a lot more money, right? They don't look at it that way. They look at it as like, today I'm making this,

what do I need to make tomorrow? Well, and that's why people will leave a job that they make $2 an hour more at, even though there's no upside in the career because they're so short-sighted for that two bucks. Exactly, they only see what's, I always tell people, have a 10-year vision, that's okay,

but have a one-year goal because if you have 10-year goals, well, the playing field you're playing on, like the landscape of the business arena, it's gonna be different. That's right. Your aspirations, the things that are happening, your competitors in the space,

like who's gonna be doing what in three years, you can't predict that. Like you have no idea. Fucking 10 years ago, man, we fucking internet barely even existed. Like imagine if another social network comes out and changes everything. Well, just look at Amazon.

Yeah. I mean, 10 years ago, it was not even a conversation. It was a book app. Exactly. You know what I mean? You rented books on it. And now it's changed the whole playing field, right?

Yeah, for sure. I mean, shit, my dad orders on fucking Amazon. You know, but I mean, he's 71 years old. He ordered a shower door on Amazon. I mean, put, wrap your head around that. A shower door. You know, but I think the conversation, Andrew, you talked about the belief fairy, right? The success fairy.

The success fairy. And you talked about how you have to believe. And the success fairy lives next to the money tree and the good employee tree. She's the one that takes care of it and prunes it. Yeah. But I think, and I had this conversation as a company, we had it a couple weeks back. We were talking about vision boards and talking about tangible items

and really seeing where your future is going to be. Talk about belief. And I made a comment, just because you guys were talking about believing in where you're going to go and really the power of your thinking and how you're going to end up. I played professional baseball in the St. Louis Cardinals organization, and was drafted in 2003. I was like a 900 million pick of the draft. But, you know, I look at when I got drafted and I had a little bit of success and I progressed through the system, I never believed that I would get to the big leagues. Like I never believed that

I would get there. I just thought I was lucky and I had the opportunity to get where I was at and I was going to enjoy the fucking ride while I was there. And I look back on what it is now and it's the only goal that I've ever set for myself that I've never achieved because I didn't believe in it. And I didn't take the components in which you're speaking of, utilize and harness my talents to go in and attack that goal. I left it out there for the belief people for the ferry. And I, and I, And it's taught me so

many fucking lessons because I know I was as talented. I know I had the work ethic. I know I had all the skills, but I, for whatever reason at that time in my life, I was 21, 22 years old. I didn't possess the mental maturity when you, because you were just speaking about experience. You think about the time. Well, dude, so you got to remember, man, that's what fucking you've been taught your whole life. You go to school and what do they teach you they they say you say oh i want to be a professional baseball player and they say what well 900 there's only 900 there's only 990 something professional baseball players you'll have to get really lucky to get chosen to be a man to be a player yeah lucky to get chosen that's what man, to be a player. Yeah. Lucky to get chosen. That's what people hear their whole lives.

You know what I'm saying? So like to develop belief when you've been coached your whole life to believe that it's, you're getting chosen, not you make it happen is a hard thing to step from. Well, and that's, that's where I was talking, you know, and it resonated with me again when you were talking about experience, right? Like you pay for experience. Like that's part of, you're moving forward and you're progressing.

You're going to make mistakes. Honestly, your forward might really be backwards, but you're moving. And so I still, and I write about it every once in a while, I keep my helmet in my office from when I played for a reason to understand it's the experience I taught that you have to believe that you can fucking do it. You always have to believe. Dude, but let's talk about that for a second because I've never actually talked about belief on this podcast.

We've done 100 episodes or something. Dude, let's talk about what fucking belief really means. Because I'm going to tell you right now. I tell people my goals, like my material goals or my business goals. Like I say, dude, I'm going to own a fucking G650. tell people my goals like dude like my material goals or my business goals like dude i i like i say dude i'm gonna own a fucking g650 i don't like or i say dude we're gonna build a multi-billion dollar company on a first form i do not that like when i say that people misunderstand what i'm really fucking saying what i'm saying is i'm gonna fucking own a g650 I'm saying is I'm going to fucking own a G six 50.

And I'm saying, I'm going to build a multi fucking billion dollar company. And there's really nothing that anybody else could fucking do to stop it from happening. And the belief that is behind those statements, there's zero fucking percent doubt. It's not a 1% doubt or 2% doubt. I'm not saying affirmations to myself at night to convince myself. I fucking believe it. You know what I'm saying?

And you're backing it up with the actions to actually bring it to life. Yeah, I'm willing to do what it fucking takes, like no matter what that is. But you see that belief to you makes sense, but from the outside in, you have to look that the common people watching this, right? The only time belief makes sense to someone is if they understand the confidence aspect of why you're saying it.

Because remember, what I said earlier, confidence is the pre, kind of like the before the belief model. So when confidence evolves, right, it manifests itself in the form of belief internally, like for the human being, for the person. So when you say, I'm gonna do this, to you, it's coming from a place of confidence where your confidence, your track record has enabled you to envision 10 years ahead and say, that shit's gonna happen. We're going to this destination no matter what. I'm just letting you know.

But from the outside and when you look at that and you don't know Andy and you've never talked to Andy and you hear that, to that person who's not trained yeah it's no different than the kids saying I want a Lamborghini right right but it comes from a place of confidence for you but so so it comes with a trap record of experience right so dude I agree 100 you have to do shit you have to I talked about this on my fear podcast

you have to attack your fears and overcome your fears to believe that you can actually do shit. And that's where confidence is born. It comes from you doing shit and then believing you can do more shit. So you have to do stuff to believe you can do stuff. But I also believe, and I never actually talked to you about this,

and I'm gonna be interested in what you think. I believe there is some sort of metaphysical or unseen power to true belief I believe that I I believe that we don't as humans don't know what it is because I can think of so many and I'm talking you know we talk people talk about the law of attraction and they talk about the fucking secret and all this there's so much more to it than that if you're looking into the law of attraction. But what are your thoughts on that? I really believe that there is a, when you truly, truly, truly believe something

without doubt and you're willing to do it, I just feel like it's gonna happen. It's almost like the power of alchemy, right? Like making something happen. You know, like come to life that you have in your head. head and i'm crazy dude i think about this shit sometimes i'm like all right look crazy no but we have 10 of our brain that people know what what people do that science knows what it does there's 90 of the brain that nobody knows what the fuck it's for and like dude i've just seen so many things in my life manifest themselves like literally dude look i'll

tell you a story i gotta tell you this story because it's almost unbelievable i would tell two stories about this okay so our phd chad kirksick uh okay when i was first launching first form nobody fucking believed in it everybody said oh, oh, fucking Andy's making that shit in his bathtub, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And that was the fucking, that's what everybody said. So nobody believed. Like, dude, and I was, you know, we were nothing. We were literally nothing. We were literally picking the product up from the manufacturer, putting it in my fucking garage.

That's how much product we had. It fit in my fucking garage. That's how much product we had. It fit in my fucking garage. So when I would go talk to people about the brand, I would like have a pitch. And in my pitch, and I would say, and the only reason I knew this, I knew the University of Oklahoma had a science program for nutritional supplements.

And so I would tell people, I would say, and this is going to be an embarrassing story to tell, but I don't give a fuck because it's the truth. So I would bullshit people and I would say, Oh dude, you know, we're making the best products. We're doing some studies at the university of Oklahoma, which dude, I didn't know anybody at the university of Oklahoma. All I knew was that they did studies on the product. And so I would just fucking say that. And I would say, I said it 20 fucking thousand times to the point where I fucking believed it,

even though there was no truth to it. It was total bullshit. So dude, we're at my dad's house for Christmas. Like this is like two years after we started the company. And my dad has this big Christmas party. And so I'm sitting down with like a couple of my friends I hadn't seen in a while. They're like, hey, Andy, how's first form going?

And I automatically go into my pitch, right pitch oh dude it's great we're getting these products made and uh we're gonna get them tested the university of oklahoma blah blah blah and i hear this voice behind me and it goes the university of oklahoma well who do you talk to there and i'm like oh fuck i'm busted i'm like no so like immediately i'm like well you know i don't know exactly where i'm like fucking i don't know what and so this girl she goes well my brother's the head the head of research there and i go oh really what what's the head of research and she goes well he handles all the research on the on supplements and i'm like at the university of oklahoma and she's like yeah his name's chad kirkzik and i'm like there's no way university oklahoma the one oh you boomer sooner yeah what i'm lying about yeah

your brother's the head of research there and she's like yeah and i'm like oh well i'm dealing with so i like go back into bullshit mode and i'm like oh so i'm dealing with somebody who's like way below him probably why don't you give me his number so this girl ends up being the fucking girlfriend of my cousin who's one of my best friends he was in my wedding he's been like a big brother to me uh my whole life they're married now okay they have kids and chad her brother is one of our good fucking friends who is our fucking resident PhD at First Form. Now tell me fucking that ain't weird shit. No, I mean it's... That's not coincidence.

No, it's the power of putting yourself out there. That's what I'm saying. Energy attracts energy. So if you put out energy looking for something, you're going to find it. Just like when... You ever notice people find people that are just like them? But dude, think about the scale of that fucking story no i completely like the stars like like dude that's not coincidence

there's no fucking way but it's what it's what you put out there over and over and over that attracted you to people yes exactly that we're exactly what you were talking exactly so dude let me give you another example just real quick because this is a really good one. So before I was married, I was in a relationship that was not good, but it wasn't like anybody's fault. It was just the nature of the relationship. She was somebody and I was somebody else. We didn't have much in common and it just fucking wasn't good. Like we argued a lot. So I would go down to Vinyl Images uh which they did all our graphics for our company

and uh they had this girl that worked down there and i would go in there and i would look at i would look at the girl and i'm like man she's pretty hot you know she was married i never thought anything of it like i never thought like oh i'm gonna try to flirt with her i had a girlfriend that lived with me she was married i. I never thought anything of it. But I used to always think, I'm like, man, this girl's hot. She's cool. What a prize she is. She's so awesome. You know, man, I really wish I had a relationship like that.

And I used to always think that, like to the point where I would just like think it. And I kept going down there, going down there, going down there. And not to see her because I'm friends with the owner of the company. But I would always think of how cool she was and how nice she was and how polite she was and how and i used to actually think she was full of shit because it was so like perfect i'm like this girl gotta be fucking crazy i just don't know it well uh a year later like a year three four years later, she's divorced and I'm down there at the office and we're talking and shit and my relationship is over

and she fucking asked me out on a date. Now I'm fucking married to her. You see what I'm saying? Like, dude, there was no reason for me to ever fucking like, I didn't pursue it. I didn't ask her out.

I didn't try to. But you thought about it. I fucking obsessed over it. Exactly. Well, that's the thing it. I didn't ask her out. I didn't try to. But you thought about it. I fucking obsessed over it. Exactly. Well, that's the thing. So like the energy you put out was reciprocated back to you. But that's what I'm saying about belief though. Like if you can fucking truly believe shit and focus on it,

shit just happens, man. And there's no explanation for it. But it's not just focus. You did something to it. Look, you told a lot of people about that story earlier about the the chemist thing yeah like so you were you were constantly bringing it up right right yeah and the same thing you were constantly going down and seeing not for her but i'm saying you were engaging in that action right back and forth back and forth back and forth right until so you were preparing yourself in the indirectly not being

right and your thought process was there. When the opportunity presented itself, then it made sense, right? Right. It became. Now, if it would have happened earlier, maybe it wouldn't have even worked because one of you had a relationship. Bad timing. The other didn't. Exactly.

But if you wouldn't have obsessed over it and if you wouldn't have done the showing up. Right. Then that connection wouldn't have happened as much. You know what I mean? Right. You would have been a forgotten guy. And I agree 100%. Like, dude, I am no way saying, like,

hey, if you just fucking believe it, you'll achieve it. But, dude, the real fucking heart from your heart belief and follow with fucking action. It holds a lot of weight. It's pretty hard to fucking beat. No, no, it holds a lot of weight. That means some amazing shit can come from that. Dude, I mean, look at it.

I believe that could change the way people look at self-education and i could provide a platform that would be better and cheaper than a school you know like to to kind of learn the basics of what you need in life i believe that yeah i believed i needed to do it via the internet you know and not do it in person building a school and everything i had zero experience although we should do a live event yeah we should we will we will yeah not just you we will me you a couple other people we should do like a kick-ass we'd fucking it'd be awesome i agree a new vaughn too but i mean think about if you believe in something bad enough and and just the same thing that happened to you happened to me the more i I believed that I wanted to do this, right? And the more I put it out there.

Randomly, I started like my, I had a client in banking who had a son who was unmotivated. And he just sends him up and he's like, hey, can you motivate my kid? He knows you got cars. And I'm like, you want me to motivate the fuck to look like him? He's like, motivate him. I'm like, what the fuck? Are you the motivation fairy? And at that time, I had fuck? Are you the motivation fairy? It was a fucking yard.

And at the time, I had- He's a Persian Tony Robbins. I had nothing to do with motivation. I didn't have secret entourage. I had nothing to do with that shit. So I was like, why are you asking me? He's like, you just look like you're in control. You should help him.

He likes your cars, and I think he'd listen to you more than he listens to me. I said, all right, fine. Send him over, and I'll talk to him. So at this time, I had this idea in my head that I'm telling a lot of people about this platform I want to build called, and I didn't call it Secret Entourage, but that's what it is today. I was like, I want to build this thing, and people are like, whatever, man. You know how to make money in these other spaces. Go do that.

Why don't you do more of that? And I was like, no, man, I want to do this other thing. They're like, it's going to take you 10 years to figure this out. The internet, who knows the internet? I was like, dude, I'll figure this out. Even though I knew nothing about coding, I sucked at everything that was artist-like. And I was like, you know what was like dude i'll figure this out even though i knew nothing about coding i sucked at everything that was artist like and i was like you know what i'm gonna figure this out and then this guy's like hey go talk to my son you know like i was like ah you know what fine whatever i'll talk to your son so he shows up and i start you know i start talking

to him i was like hey what what do you do now he's like oh i love internet marketing but he's like i just you know i just don't know what to do in life and i was like hey tell me what do you think about this idea well and now he's the co-founder of my company and you know he's he's been, I just don't know what to do in life. And I was like, hey, tell me what you think about this idea. Well, and now he's the co-founder of my company, and he's been the one that's come true for seven years and has been one of the main reasons why Secret Entourage not only happened, but has been successful. That's awesome, man. And it's just been like, you put it out there.

You believe it. You keep talking about it. You bring it up. And it aligns, man. Right, and then things happen. And because you're always thought it's in your head all the time. It's like first thought is there as you're obsessed with it.

You identify the opportunities immediately, right? Like you saw an opportunity and then it opened up her way to ask you out the same way that I saw an opportunity. So I brought it up to this kid with not the intention of recruiting him, just like, hey, what do you think about this? And he gave me that reciprocity that was like,

oh, I like your enthusiasm. I think this is great. I think I can help. So basically, in backwards of 19 minutes, if you believe, it's the single common factor in your head that makes each decision you make based on that. The belief is, the original point I wanted to make 30 minutes ago

is that the belief has to be a no it has to be and i'm not saying no i'm saying k-n-o-w the like the level of belief that i'm talking about here is fucking knowing it like knowing it to the point where you fucking know it and if you could get yourself in that position, it's very, very, very powerful. You know, I just personally, my personal beliefs, I don't have any proof other than my own life. I just think that's, I think it's the key. I think it's the key. You don't need any other proof. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? You're your own validation. Right. But that's the basis of moving forward when you go back to like progress like I try to explain that to people and people And it's hard to develop belief that you're gonna be a quote-unquote millionaire When you have fucking five dollars in your account You know what I'm saying? So you have to go out and have some wins to develop the confidence that we talked about

Yeah, and then to go back to what we said earlier, you know Like just people have to stop being constant victims of everything around them. And they have to believe in themselves. When you talk about the millennial thing, and that resonated really well, because I actually would side with Gary Vee on this in that sense, but the victim card

is one that bothers me the most. You know, why did this happen to me? Well, I mean, everybody has that. Well, it's a result of your fucking actions. No, I understand that. Look, as simple as saying I didn't get funding, like I can't start because I don't have money. You know, I can't do anything.

So it's either I have a million dollars in my bank account before by someone believing in me, or I'm not even gonna take step one in my business, right? Like, and I always tell people, like, you know, they always tell me, they're like, I need support. My family has to support me. My uncle has to give me some money.

I have to have this align and this align and this align, and then I'll start a business. And I'm like, listen, first off, you never need support to get results. You need results to get support. That's right. So like this straight up. You got it ass backwards. Yeah, exactly. You know what I mean?

Once you do, once you put out there, once you get traction, somehow you'll see all these people who are first telling you you're retarded come to you and be like, hey, I'm all about- Here's my check. Yeah. He's like, how can I play? How can I help you for free? I'll work there 10 years for free. I just want to be part of this.

Right? Yes. Because remember, we expect people to know what's in our heads when we have vision. Right? We're like, oh, I see this world where I'm going to reinvent the way self-education works and people are like why you who are you like you know you did well with this car space doesn't mean anything like why would you do it well they don't see what i see so it would be foolish of me to expect support from people who can't see a vision that i've never shared with them shown them that they can't see clearly right and yet so many people

use that as a fucking excuse. Right, because they have this victim mentality. I live in the wrong place. I have no money. I don't have this. I don't have that. I don't have that. Well, it's an easy out.

Yeah, so basically- It's the reason to be lazy. Quit being a fucking pussy. Well, I mean, okay, so that's why. I mean, I didn't want to drag it on too much, but it's- You met my dad, right? Very briefly. My dad has been such an inspiration to both Andrew and I, because when we were kids, he wouldn't let us be pussies.

And I still believe this. That's how, like, when I talk about winning, it's so ingrained in my fucking brain that I don't care who I'm facing. Like, I'm convinced I can win. You know what I mean? And it's the mindset that goes into the approach that makes you – Dude, I believe that so much that if I don't know I can win, I won't fucking do it. Because I know how important that belief is. You know what I mean? Yeah, and I just – I take a different approach.

I believe that. But even on things that I know maybe deep down that maybe not my honey hole or not something I'm professional in. Like if I give it what I fucking got, you're going to be fucking hands full. You know what I mean? But I believe because I believe in myself. You know what I mean? I believe in the powers that I possess in that in that realm. But we were taught that at a young age.

You can fucking do it. I think you want, I think, you know, I think there's so many things that people can pull from your book that are important. And I think one of them that I want to touch on just before we close up on everything is a term that I feel has gotten watered down because it's used so much now. I feel like so many people use this term. I hate using it. And because I feel like people don't know what the fuck it means because it's overused. Okay. And that term is self-awareness. Yeah. Everybody's talking about self. It's the fucking, it's the fucking buzzword, right?

It's the buzzword now. Just like being an entrepreneur is the buzz thing now. Being self-aware, self-awareness, blah, blah, blah. And I see all these people fucking repeating it. And Gary Vaynerchuk, it's your fucking fault because you say it so much. Yeah, because he starts bringing it up. But he gets it. He knows what it means.

But so many people just keep saying it. And I'm like, bro, you're using it the wrong, you don't even know what the fuck it means. Like, I feel like your book is a manual to self-awareness. It is. Okay, so since you wrote this book, let's talk about self-awareness and what it means to you. So I think most people confuse

awareness and self-awareness. And I think that's the biggest problem is they use the word self-awareness, but what they're really trying to say or talk about is awareness. Being alert, being understanding or comprehensive of the environment you're in to most people is self-awareness, which in reality, it's only awareness. It's like understanding the environment you're in to most people is self-awareness,

which in reality, it's only awareness. It's like understanding what's happening, understanding everything, you consciously being there, right? Right. That's awareness. Now, self-awareness takes that one step further. It's your ability to understand

not just your environment that you're in and what's happening in it, but how the environment is responding back to you as a human being within it. Right. So this is the part that most people miss. They don't, they look at their environment and they're quick at like judging people

and understanding what's happening in their environment, but they're not understanding how their environment is judging them back based on their behaviors. Right. Based on the symbols they put out, the things they wear, the way they speak, the way they approach an environment, the way they even look at people. All of those things are symbols we put out there and that the environment shoots back at us.

As we're identifying people and really looking at them and being like, what do I think of this guy? Well, they're looking at us. Right. So do we have enough of that self-awareness to understand how to position? Into an environment where we control the environment instead of the environment controlling us Meaning like are we able to understand or perceive how an environment works before entering it and understanding as a result of our presence there How does it change the dynamics of that environment now?

That sounds really philosophical and fucking complicated some people doesn't but but if we understand because most people most people feel like they are powerless and that they're what they put out or do has no well there's something bigger than that most people feel that every environment they're in revolves around them that's the problem most people feel that it once they enter the environment. Like it's a fucking Truman Show. Yeah, they think that once they enter the environment, the environment still responds, you know, it's about them and how they're interacting with it and everything about it.

They're not really identifying or really reflecting on how the environment is, because everybody in that environment typically thinks, it's about me, like what's my experience here, what's happening at that moment for me. But they're not really looking at the environment as a whole. And the reason my book does a really good job at breaking that down is because it teaches people how to remove themselves from the equation. What if you were looking at yourself from a third perspective in an environment? And how you, what if you could

watch a movie of yourself, right? Like one of the- What would you think of that guy? Right, exactly. Like, and what's funny is like, this is one of the number one core strategies I used to train salespeople, like in my old days in banking. I used to videotape them in their environment without them knowing they're being videotaped. And then I was like, watch yourself. And they're like, watch myself what? I was like, I recorded your entire interaction. They would watch themselves like, I look retarded.

They were like, I sound retarded. I do a lot of um. I play with my pen for like 20 minutes. I had no idea my shoes looked so terrible. You know, like in. So I looked completely confused, right? But they thought they did great. You know, they were like, I killed that interaction.

Now I'm like, imagine if you were really alert and really aware of how your clients are perceiving you. Not just because right now you're looking at yourself from that client perspective, because you're looking at it from a third party perspective and not how you're impacting the environment, not how your client's impacting the environment, but the entire playing field. Strategically, you can do a lot more if you truly understand not just what's going on

around you, but how what's going on around you is not only going to impact you, but the impact you're going to make walking in it too, right? Like both sides of the equation. And by understanding these things, then you're able to make walking in it too, right? Like both sides of the equation. And by understanding these things, then you're able to position yourself better, both in life and in situations like small situations. You can strategically go at life, strategically, with purpose, and with a plan, not just float through and like...

And also gain a lot more traction through life because you're not always focused about what's in it for you. This is going to sound really weird, but you talk about that. But if we go to dinner or we have guests in town, I'll be in the shower and I will play the conversation out in my head of each person that I'm going to have. And I think about what I'm going to wear and how that's going to, and how I'm going to have that conversation with that person. And I make sure that in my head, I'm mapping a game plan on how that night is going to go.

That's for a fucking barbecue. This ain't for fucking sales. You know what I'm saying? But I learned that, and again, I hate, you know, I'm not, and I don't hate, I'd love to give the credit to my dad. Like the reason I was always a successful salesperson because in that conversation,

like i am five steps down the road correct you're ahead of the what's happening so it's like chess i'm already out of that conversation like i'm asking you questions to move me through that motion but i'm taking you there but you already know where you're heading you know the interaction you're going to create and how i knew that in the shower dude and and that's like and i have a hard time explaining that to people like you, and I, and I, and I know it sounds really, you, you understand it, right? Some people are probably like, yeah, bullshit. But like, that's how my life works. I know. Cause I do the same thing. I know I do the

exact same thing. Not like in the shower, but no, no, no. But I, I, I play the conversation down and I, and I know that there's okay. 75% that he's going to say yes to this. But if he says no, how am I going to respond? What am I going to say? You know what I mean? It's a map that I pre-map in my head to play that out. Well, you're playing a game with your life, right? You're playing chess for your life. Everything I do is a strategic play. Exactly. And it has either a short-term goal or a long-term goal, and it's a smaller play, part of a bigger play. That's why my day is so structured.

But what you're doing is you're positioning yourself with every interaction for something bigger that's coming and how to actually get to places you need to get. If more people did that, right, if more people did that or were aware of that enough, then it would end up becoming a world where people are making conscious decisions, understanding why they do what they do. Like, the thing in my book about self-awareness is not about just teaching people, you know, just about the idea of being strategic in your day, etc. But it's also about saying, you don't want to go to school, fine. You don't want to, you know, you don't love your job, you don't quit, fine, no problem. Do you understand why you don't want to go to school? you understand what you're gonna do right like

like are you consciously making decisions or are you a constant byproduct of the environment i had this conversation before the podcast started and i was frustrated with an employee right the frustration comes from when i ask when i ask them why did you do that and the answer is i don't know that is the most there's nothing that bothers me more. Like, because when you make a mistake, you should know why you made the decision to make the mistake, right? So you can make a corrective action

to make the right decision. You made a conscious decision, right? The I don't know is so fucking frustrating to me because somewhere there's a thought process and if you can fix that, you know, you can fix that thought process, you can resolve the problem so you don't encounter that the next time.

Yeah, again and again and again over. So that's the frustration piece when we were talking earlier is I have that conversation because, you know, every move you make is calculated. Whether you know it or not, there's a decision making process that happens in order to make a better decision the next time. So you don't make the wrong decision. So you don't make the same mistake twice. Right. Which is moron. You have to understand where you fucked up.

And if I don't know, does not answer that question. So make them read their circle theory. No, no, no. I'm with you. No, no, no. And that's the point. I'm understanding. So that's the point, right? who is not self-aware, make them see things outside of their world a different way to the

point where they can become more aware and probably self-aware, hopefully. The cool thing about the third circle theory, and I said this to you before, is that when you read it and then you go back and read it a year later, and then you go back and read it a year later, it's going to mean different things to you. And it's one of the most it's probably the most unique book that i've ever read uh when i when i first picked it up i thought that the book was about entrepreneurship making money and as i read it i felt like it's more of a manual on how to become something great. And I'm just so appreciative. And, dude, you know I told you this.

I won't plug shit unless it's real. I get people that want to sponsor the show all the time. I get people. And that's fine. I'll do sponsorships. But I got to like the fucking product. What's funny, the first time you even plug the book I didn't even know you

Yeah, someone was like Andy was on his show. I was like what show But here because we're running long on time here guys if you are Listening to this podcast and you're wondering what the fuck are we talking about? 50% of the time, A, send your hate emails to PJ because his brain works in a different way. B, go buy the fucking book because this is a project of true passion for this man. He cares about it. He loves doing this, just like I love doing this podcast. That's why I do it for free and spend all the time and money that I do producing it.

I don't do it because I want to make money, and that's not why PJ does the third circle theory. This is something that he has put a lot of thought, a lot of heart and soul, and a lot of passion into doing, which is why I enjoy speaking with you so much because I think our passions align. And it's always a good conversation. Yeah, absolutely, man. It forces you to think. Oh, dude. Dude, there's not many people I've talked to that I have to work to keep up with. You know what I mean? That's a compliment. Well, and it's such a different perspective.

And I want to continue the Lamborghini Audi conversation when we're done. You know, the perspective. And that was what I enjoyed most about the book because i'm a i'm a thinker like in most books you read to i don't want to say take information um no but that's how most books are formed is they provide you know information to where is the the how the biggest take home for me for the book was to get me to critically think, which I, which I, which I enjoy doing anyhow, but it makes you really dive into that tune on your body, you know, or in your mindset that,

that the take home, especially for people who struggle to get to that mindset, it'd be a fucking great stepping stone. You know, I have not read it, but I have not read it twice. I'm gonna go home and read it again. I guarantee you to get the perspective.

You get more. Yeah. Yeah. I'm actually excited to read it, to read it. And guys, this is not, it's this book is not like reading Dr. Seuss. I mean, when you're reading this book, it is an active read. And what I mean by that is you are going to have to read and think at the same time.

For me, read the same page twice. Yeah. Yeah, man. But, dude, it's so rich in content, man. It's just an awesome read. Before we close up, dude, if people take away nothing else from what you would have to teach, let's say a couple sentences,

something that you could say to somebody that would be very simple that they should take away to live a successful life, what would you say that is? Anytime you believe you're met with an obstacle, you are bound to believe in the victim mentality. And so every time you see an obstacle,

prevent yourself from getting there. And instead, find a way around that obstacle, but never allow the obstacle, doesn't matter what it is, to be the reason why you give up. So if you find a way around it, but never allow the obstacle doesn't matter what it is to be the reason why you give up so if you find a way around it that's fine if it takes longer as a result of it that's fine but don't i just we just need more people to to stop being victims yeah and to start just even you know what if you're assisting if you're a cashier somewhere fine i get it it's not

a million dollar job but be the best fucking cashier that place has ever had. Amen. Right? At the very fucking least, do that. You're a car salesman, be the best fucking car salesman. 100% agree. And you'll open hundreds of doors down the road. I love that.

That's it. That is the truth. Because there's people listening right now that are working in a company or are working in a company that they don't see potential in. But what you have to realize is that by you creating value in yourself and becoming the best at what you do, somebody is going to notice. And you will have doors open for you. And let me leave you with this. This is really important. Nobody works for anybody but themselves. I think this is the biggest fucking problem this country has,

is that everybody thinks it's like, I want to work for myself. I want to be my own boss. You always work for yourself. From the day you are born, you are your own boss. Every step you take, every move you make benefits you. And so you have to figure out, right? Like, stop saying, I want to be my own boss. I want to be my own boss.

Like this is, you are your own boss. So be accountable for your own life. Make decisions that are going to not only further yourself, but are going to help those around you. And eventually just provide massive fucking value to anything you touch at any given time. PJ, how can they find you on social media? They can reach me on Instagram and at I create millionaires

and the best other places to reach me is on secret entourage at secret entourage dot com or to find the book at third circle book dot com guys go buy the book buy the book I rarely tell people to buy anything this is a book that you

have to have it's a must have it's a must read read the book. Guys, before I close out, you know, we don't ask for anything. I'm not selling anything. The only thing I ask is that if you find somebody that you think will benefit from the content here, please refer me one person. That's your little fee. That's your little project. I appreciate you guys. I love you guys. And we'll catch up with you next time.