REAL AF with Andy Frisella - The #1 Thing You're Doing That Is Sabotaging Your Success, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO260

Episode Date: August 30, 2018

If it's true that everyone has the potential to be successful, why aren't the majority of people successful? It's not a matter of education or intelligence or natural giftedness. It's a matter of the will. Successful people are willing to do something that most people are not. They are willing to look bad...really bad...on their way to getting good at something & becoming someone who is truly great. Unsuccessful people aren't like this. The minute they look or feel stupid...they quit.

I can stack them hundreds to the roof. I ain't stopping till they stack to the moon. Without me, my family wouldn't have food. Anybody go against me, gotta lose. What is up, guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host, and I am the motherfucking CEO. Guys, the goal here, if you're new, is to get you to become the motherfucking CEO of you. And now you might be wondering like, oh yeah, we're a business podcast. But you know what? To be good in business, you got to do a lot of shit really fucking good. And one of those things is you've got to develop yourself.

Another one of those things is you've got to develop your skills. Okay? And we cover both of those things in this podcast. So don't tune out because you think, oh, I don't own a business or I don't have aspirations to own a business because the truth is, is you're running a business every day and that business is you. All right. And the skills and the techniques and the concepts and everything that we talk about here are all going to be applicable to you no matter what it is you do. Whether you're working in a company and you want to move up or whether you own your own company and you want to grow it, all these things are the same, okay?

We started this podcast because, quite honestly, I was really tired of the false information and the idealist concepts that are being taught to our kids. I run a pretty big company. I have a lot of employees that are what you would call millennials. And guess what? We fucking dominate. You know why we dominate? Because we corrected some of the bad shit they've been taught their whole life. Okay?

So if you want to dominate, this is the same thing that I tell my teams. This is the same concepts we talk about at our meetings. I get emails and texts and, you know, DMs all the time from people who are wanting to come sit in on one of our company meetings and they want to know why we're doing so good or how we're able to grow or how we did this or that. Look, I'm giving it to you here for free. All right. I'm giving you my, my playbook is here. There's nothing that I keep from you. Okay. And all I ask in return is that you tell your friends about the podcast. All right. Now I'm not saying you have to tell all your friends, but I'm asking

that if you get value out of this podcast, that for every podcast you listen to, you tell a new person. That's it. That's all I ask. And I think that's a pretty fair price because I'm giving you information that could make you millions of fucking dollars over the course of your life, could lead a higher quality life, could make you more happy, more fulfilled, and leave a better legacy than what you're leaving now. And I'm giving it to you for free. So that's that. Now, today is Thursday Thunder. And if you're new, we usually do two podcasts a week.

Recently, we've been doing three. We're trying to figure out what we're going to do. But we're always going to have Thursday Thunder. And Thursday Thunder is just, you know, a little bit of a rant, so to speak. And today, I want to rant about something that is I see everywhere I see this literally everywhere all right I swear to you when I'm telling you this I enjoy being bad at things. I love being bad at things. Okay. Because when you're bad at things, you have blue sky opportunity to get better. All right. There's tons of potential there to grow. There's tons of movement that you can make forward. All right. And that's exciting to me. And I'm going to tell you why it's exciting

to me and why you should also learn to enjoy being bad. All right. In my business, when I started in 1999, by the way, I failed eight other businesses before that. When I started our company, we were fucking bad. All right. And we were bad for a long time, all right? I didn't like being bad then because I was scared shitless. I was scared that if I was continuing to be bad, that, you know, we would lose everything, we would lose our opportunity, and I'd end up being, you know,

not what I desired to be in my life. And we went the first 10 years, you know, we didn't make much money. Uh, we calculate Chris and I calculated it. We made $58,000 a piece for the first 10 years in business. Okay. And I'm not talking about, we made that every year. If you took all the money we made from year one to year 10, we made a 58 grand. All right. That's, that's the truth. Um, first three years we, we didn't get paid the next seven years. We got $695 a month each. And that's what we did. And we worked other jobs, uh, to keep the stores open. The stores would not have survived if we had not worked those other jobs. And we slept in the back of that store on and off over the

course of years. Um, and we sucked at a lot of things that we did. And you know what? I did not enjoy it then. I did not enjoy being bad. And I wish I had. I wish I had. I wish I had the belief in myself at that time that eventually I would become good. And this is why most of you guys don't enjoy being bad. But here's what happens as you become more successful and as you start to figure things out, you start to get better at it, at what it is that you're doing. Okay. So now here we are 20 years in business. Uh, next year will be 20 years. Um, and in my world, there's not much shit that I'm bad at. That's the truth. Like I don't get to be bad at very many things anymore because I'm consumed with the things I'm good at. All right. What does that

mean though? That means it can get very monotonous and very boring because now I have the belief that I'm going to get where I want to go. And now I have the skills. Now it's just a matter of time working its course. Okay. And that can be very boring. So I look back now from where I'm at at this point in time, and I wish I could go back to my, you know, 19 or 20 year old self and say, Hey, look, dude, you're going to fucking make it. You need to enjoy this time of being bad and not have so much anxiety and just work on

your skills and keep getting better and keep improving. Because the truth of it is guys, is that being bad at shit is the most exciting shit that you could do in your life. And this is coming from someone who's, who's done pretty well so far in his life. Um, I've accomplished pretty much everything I've ever wanted to accomplish so far. And I'm certainly going to accomplish everything that I want to accomplish over the course of my life. Um, now I know that sounds weird and I know it doesn't make sense, but I can tell you when I look back on my entrepreneurial journey that I, the most fun I had was the little victories I learned along the way. It was figuring out the roadmap. It was figuring out what I was doing right or wrong. It was figuring out

how to handle our customers. It was figuring out how to, you know, have employees. And so many of you guys are in such a hurry to figure all that shit out that you're missing out on the excitement that it actually has just like I did okay so now I do things like I made a post yesterday about shooting a bow you know I never shot a bow I'm not a hunter I've never killed any animals okay that's not the intent the intent is to be good at shooting a fucking bow and guess what I'm not very good and that's why I like it because I know I have so much room to improve and it's going to be exciting to get better. All right. And the true fulfillment and the true fucking good shit about success and building something is not getting to the point where you have the money or you have the cars or you have the house or you have the big company. It isn't all that shit. It's, it really is like they say, as cheesy as it sounds, the

journey, it is the little bitty victories that you have along the way. Okay. Those things I could tell you are going to be the most rewarding things that you're going to find over the course of your next 20 years trying to build your career or build your business or build your life. And some of us, I'm guilty of this, and this is why I'm telling you as a precaution. Some of us do, we are so focused and we're so driven and we're so in a hurry to get the life that we miss out on a lot of the cool shit along the way. And this all stems from us not wanting to be bad at things, not liking to be bad at things. And guys, this is not just, this is not just in your career.

This is in your life. Okay. How many business owners, people with ambition, people that want to succeed, which you wouldn't be listening to this podcast. If you weren't in that group, you're already one of those people. Those people have a tendency to miss out on so much cool shit because they're uber competitive to the point where they can't enjoy being bad at something and improving all right and I just want to share this lesson with you it's a little bit different than what I would normally talk about but I want to save you the next 20 years while you're building this. Okay. Imagine how your life would be different, how you would feel different, how you would enjoy your life. If someone came to you, like let's say a genie or Jesus or God or whoever it is with the, all the power in the world, and said, hey, you know what?

You're going to get where you want to go. It's 100% stone cold written in fucking stone that you are going to get where it is you want to go. How would you feel differently? How would you feel differently? How would you live differently? I promise you a lot of you guys would take a lot more time to enjoy the process if you knew that you were going to get where you want to go. And the problem with this, guys, is you will get where you want to go. If you do the fucking work, if you do it day in and day out and you're effective and you have

the ability to learn from your mistakes, there is no way that you cannot get where you want to go. But the problem with this is, is that society has convinced every single motherfucker in this country and across the world that there's people that are the haves and there's people that are the have-nots and you know what if you're not one of the haves you have no chance of being at or if you're not you have no chance of being one by just you know doing your thing you got to get lucky you got to win the lottery you got to be a celebrity you got to do this this this all we're fucking told are the glory stories, the shit that is truly unbelievable. And because it's unbelievable, we don't believe that we can

accomplish those things. And that's what keeps people from ever doing what it is they want to do. So they're like, why the fuck even try if it's impossible? And I'm going to tell you, that's the biggest bullshit lie that we are ever taught over the course of our lives. Being told that it's mystical or it's luck or it's, you know, whatever it is that's not in your control is told to you for a reason, by the way. It's told to you because the real world needs fucking worker bees. The real world needs employees. The real world needs people to show up and just do their fucking job and shut the fuck up. And that's what you're fucking taught. You're not,

think about what you're taught in school. You're taught like, well, if you get a degree from college, you might be lucky enough to get a $60,000 a year job. And if you work hard, you can make a hundred grand. And that's the fucking roof. That's the roof. And you say, well, I want to make 10 million. Well, you know what? Just like my guidance counselor told me, you know what? That's for the cream of the crop. That really isn't for you, Andy motherfucker. It is for me. And guess what? It's for you too, but you can't talk yourself out of it because you think you're going to be bad at it. At the beginning, you can't talk yourself out of it because you think it's impossible. You can't, you guys have to wake the fuck up.

You've got to start realizing that all the shit that you've been told and spoon fed and thrown at you over and over and over again by your teachers, by your aunts and uncles, by your mom and dad, by your fucking, by these companies is all a fucking lie designed to control you. That's what we're dealing with here. Okay. And that makes us say, well, hey, look, you know what? Why would I even want to try something that I'm going to be bad at if I could never make it anyway? Why would I even want to start a business if I'm going to be terrible at it? And you know what? I don't think I could even make it anyway.

The stars would have to align perfectly and Jesus would have to flow down on his fucking cloud and let me rub his beard. That's what people think. And that's why they never try. But guys, what I'm trying to show you and want you to think about is think about something that you've become decent at. And dude, a lot of you guys are really good at things. You just don't give yourself credit for it. But like, let's, let's brag on ourselves for a minute. What are you really good at? What's something that you were really good at at one time? Maybe you were a football player. Maybe you were a dancer.

Maybe, you know, who knows what it is. Maybe you were a writer. Maybe you were, you know, whatever. Think about the first time you went out on that football field. You weren't fucking great. You sucked. And you were scared. And everybody else was scared.

And you thought you were the only person that was scared. That's the truth. That's what life is. Everybody out there that is pretending like they have their shit together for you that makes you feel like dog shit is just as scared as you are. The difference is that there are certain people that are willing to move ahead being scared and understand that they're going to be bad and they're humble enough to know that they don't know but they're aggressive enough to go ahead anyway

and that's where you got to find yourself guys and it all starts with trying to enjoy challenges trying to enjoy things you're not good at trying to enjoy learning new things and becoming better you know think about fucking one time when you lost 20 pounds or 30 pounds. You guys who have done that, was that not the fucking best thing you ever did? Why was it the best thing you ever did? Because it was hard. But yet you spend every fucking moment trying to take the easy route. Explain that logic to me.

You know that the hardest shit produces the best result. And you know to get good at the hardest shit, you're going to have to be bad at it for a long time. But you're still not willing to do that even though you know and you've experienced through all of your life that the hardest things you did were the most rewarding. So why are you running from the fucking hard? Why are you hiding from the tasks that are going to improve you?

Because somewhere along the line, you got a negative association with shit being hard and you being bad at it. And if you want to be successful, you're going to have to fix it. And that can start with, you know, like what I'm doing, shooting a bow. It could start with trying to run a mile. It could start with trying to walk a mile. It could start with anything that whatever it is in your mind that you have a fucking fear of. And you just go in and try it. And working a little bit. And seeing improvement.

That's how confidence is built. I'm sick of seeing people fail because they're so scared of being bad. They're so afraid of showing the world that they're not good at something. That they don't even do it. And what's that cost you? What's that cost you? It costs you your fucking life. It costs you not only your financial life, it costs you your happiness. It costs you friendships. It costs you relationships. It costs you fulfillment. Dude, your whole fucking dream life that you're thinking of is out there. It's out there. You just haven't stepped up to the fucking plate yet.