REAL AF with Andy Frisella - The 3 Steps to Talking Yourself Into Total Domination, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO266

Episode Date: October 11, 2018

Every day there are people who don’t achieve the goals that they could achieve if they just acted. In almost every case, the reason they didn’t act was because THEY TALKED THEMSELVES OUT OF IT. They let the "little loser voice" inside them dictate the terms of their life - who they are & what they can accomplish.But successful people take specific steps to take control of their mental conversation - and their lives. In this episode, I tell you what they do to dominate.  

I can stack them hundreds to the roof. I ain't stopping till they stack to the moon. Without me, my family wouldn't have food. Anybody go against me, gotta lose. What is up, guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host, and I am the motherfucking CEO. Today is Thursday Thunder, and if you've been listening for a while you know exactly what that means and let me tell you something I'm feeling today. I have something extremely valuable to share with you but before I share that I want to remind you of our fee. No, we don't run ads. No, I don't hawk a bunch of bullshit to you. No, I don't have events where I pitch you a bunch of shit after you've already

paid to come. No, I am here to offer real value. Listen to other guys' podcasts. You got 25 minutes of fucking ads. How annoying is annoying is that no we don't do that and the reason is i want to give you the most that i can but i do ask something in return and it is not monetary of value all i ask is that if you find value in this podcast for every episode that you find value and this episode you will find value, I ask that you share it with a friend. You can post it. You could post it in your story. You could tell someone, but I'm asking for a genuine heartfelt recommendation. What does that mean? That means when you're having a conversation about the cool shit that you

listen to or read or learn, you bring up the MFCEO project. This is a movement. This is a mission. We are on a mission together to help people learn what it is exactly they need to do to get where they want to go. Because let's face it, there's lots and lots and lots of misinformation out there and it's easy to get confused. Okay, so my mission is to help you guys learn exactly what it is that successful people are doing that maybe you're not doing yet. All right, and that's what this is about. So if you find value, give us a little share, give us a little like, tell people about us, and let's grow this movement. All right. Now, with that being said, I have something that I want to talk to you guys about today. Okay. And a lot of people who are out there in success, they talk about building a successful business

and they talk about winning and they talk about doing good. And those are all great things. But let me tell you something. And you know, if you've listened to the MFCEO project from the beginning, you know that if you want to make a million dollars, your goal has to be 10 million. If you want to make 10 million, your goal needs to be a hundred million. And if you set big, gigantic, huge goals, you're probably going to fall a little bit short. And that's why it's important to way overshoot where you're trying to be. Because when you overshoot where you're trying to be, your actions become that of a person

of greater value than the guy who's shooting for $1 million when you're shooting for $100 million. You're going to do more. You're going to learn more. You're going to become more effective because you know that the goal is much harder to reach. And because you know that, and because your actions are going to be stronger, you have a better chance of getting where it is you really want to be. All right. And you guys know, I've talked about that over and over and over again. And that doesn't just apply to your goals. Okay. It applies to how you speak to yourself and how you think about winning. If you're thinking about winning, you're going to lose a lot. If you're thinking about fucking dominating 100 to zero, running the score up, you're going to lose a lot less than if you just made your goal about winning.

All right. And today I want to talk about how you can talk yourself into becoming completely dominant in everything that you do. Every day, there are people who don't achieve the goals that they could achieve if they just acted. In almost every single case, the reason they didn't act was because they talked themselves out of it. And you know what I'm talking about, okay? You look at people, you look at yourself, you're struggling with self-doubt, lack of confidence, distractions everywhere, indecisiveness. And if you really, truly look at yourself and look at other people,

you can easily see that there's this little conversation going on in their head, okay? You can see, sometimes it's not even a conversation, sometimes it's just being dictated to by your own brain where some little voice inside your head is just saying shit and you're just listening and not saying anything back. Okay. So sometimes it's not even a conversation, but you know, and I know that most of the time that voice is not saying good things. What's that voice saying? It's saying, oh, I don't know.

That's a real big goal. I'm not sure you can do it. It's saying, hey, who are you? Who are you to try something like that? It's saying, who do you think you are? You must be delusional, okay? Only super talented people could accomplish that goal they're saying well your plan you know I don't know if your plan's good I don't know if your

plan's good you better look at the plan you better look at the plan before you start I don't know if the plan's good here's all the reasons why you can't do it and that's a huge difference between successful people people who, and people who are average. Average people hear this voice that we all have, and they let that voice dictate every single term of their life. That's what average people do. Successful people do things different. When that little voice starts a conversation or starts trying to dictate our actions in

our head, we immediately recognize it and we take control, okay? And we do three things to take control of that voice. The first thing they do is they reassert their place of authority in their own minds. Okay. They say in their head and even verbally, you know what? I'm not going to let myself talk to me like that. And that sounds crazy, right? I'm not going to let myself talk to me like that. I am going to talk for myself to myself consciously, okay? And you might say that in your brain, you might say that out loud, but the first step is to recognize

and to take back control, okay? I'm not the audience in my own head. I'm not just gonna passively listen to what's going on. I am the fucking keynote speaker in my own head and I am the one who's going to deliver the message that I give myself every fucking day. I am going to be the one dictating my directions. I am going to be the one who's dictating my actions. I am going to be the one who instills the confidence,

the swagger, and all the skillset that needs to be had to accomplish what it is, okay? And average people don't do that. Average people let that little loser voice in their head dictate all their actions, and they never stop it. They never take control, okay? Successful people, they say, stop, motherfucker. Guess what? You're wrong, and I'm fucking right,

and they silence that voice in their heads and they take over mentally. Okay. So reasserting who's in control of the authority in your own mind is the first step to taking back the conversation that is holding you back. Okay. Now what's the second step? The second step that successful people do that average people don't when we talk about domination is this. Successful people actively autocorrect the negativity in their brain, okay? They take a hold of all the negative thoughts going through their heads, and they reword and rephrase them for actions and success, all right? Tom Brady didn't think, Hey man, we're in such a huge hole. We're down 21 points. I don't think we can fucking do this. You know, the Falcons are

pretty good. That's not what he said. Tom Brady said in his brain, guess what? We are going to win this fucking game and we are going to do everything we need to do to win it. And guess what? It's going to be the greatest fucking comeback in the history of the Super Bowl. That's the championship thought. That's what champions do. And they do it with every little decision that they make. You just have to learn how to retrain the way that you word the situation, okay? Because the words that you hear are huge. Now, I'm not one on affirmations and all this other

bullshit that people do but I am one for taking control of your mentality and a conscious aware level and not letting passive negativity which by the way we all have run our thoughts and our actions okay words form sentences and the sentences inside of our heads are what our thoughts and our actions, okay? Words form sentences, and the sentences inside of our heads are what our thoughts are, and our thoughts actively affect our actions, okay? And sometimes, more importantly, our attitudes, right? Because if our attitude's off,

our actions are gonna be off. So the first thing they do is they reassert the place of authority in their own minds. the first thing they do is they reassert the place of authority in their own minds. The second thing they do is they learn to auto-correct the negativity and reframe the situation in the way that they word it to themselves because they understand that words create thoughts, thoughts create actions. All right. And the third thing they do is this. They default to their personal sales script and start rehearsing and repeating it. What do I mean by sales script? Do I mean some cheesy

used car bullshit that you hear all over the place? No, that's not what I'm talking about. But salespeople, sometimes they have an 80% rehearsed script out of repetitive nature. And it's the story that they use to sell. Right. And what we're going to do is we're going to adapt that story to the situation that we're in. So 80% of it's going to be the same almost every time 20% is going to change based on the situation, you know, and that's, that's pretty old school. Like that's the old school, uh, way to sell. And I, you know, I don't really think that that's the way to way to sell. And I, you know, I don't really think that that's the way to sell things anymore.

You know, we talk about that. That's a whole different subject. We talk about value selling. But the truth is, is that sometimes you have to use a sales script on yourself. If you want to accomplish huge, ginormous, big goals, you've got to sell yourself on the idea and you have to be able to cast your vision to yourself.

All right. And that means you're going to have to sell your vision to yourself. So when you take control of the conversation, what are the points of your sales script that you need to repeat and rehearse and, and pound into your brain? Okay. This is the vision I have for my life. This is the way it's going to be. These are my goals. This is who I am. This is my plan. These are my values. And I don't need anyone to validate me. I don't need anyone to believe in me. All I need to do is execute and believe in the work. And I know that when I'm done, the result will be there and it will feel fucking amazing. Okay. That's what you have to understand.

And you've got to continually beat that into your brain. Every time that little negative voice comes around that makes you feel insecure, that makes you feel less confident, that makes you feel like you're not enough, you have to do what I'm talking about here. These three steps, this is how I dominate. This is how other successful people dominate. I've been around enough extremely successful people that I know that all of our minds work the same. We are consciously aware of how we speak to ourselves and how we control the direction of our thoughts. All right. And the truth is, is that whenever you get enough going on in your brain, if you don't consciously control it, you'll drive yourself

fucking crazy. All right. So what do we have to do again? One, we got to reassert our place of authority. We are in control. You are in control. Not the fucking loser voice that you hear, not the little voice that gives you all the doubts and gives you all the negativity and gives you all the questions. You, the successful you, are in control. Step two, we've got to auto-correct the negativity. We don't look at the problem. We look at the solution. We don't look at the story of us losing.

We look at the story of us losing. We look at the story of us winning. And we tell ourselves that by continually step three, selling ourselves on our own life, what our vision's going to be, where we're going to end up and who the fuck we are. Because let me tell you guys something. You're not who the world tells you you are. You're who you tell you you are. And that's a big misconception. That's a big gap. It's a big divide. It is the alpha and the omega of successful people and unsuccessful people. It's two polar opposites successful people understand and know how to do these steps

so that they don't just win they fucking dominate and they know how to do it consciously consistently effectively forever and unsuccessful people sit back in their chair like they're being dictated to by somebody else, by our little loser voice, which we all have, and they take that shit. They don't ever stop it. They don't ever take control. They don't ever do what they need to do to fix it, and that's why they get what they get. This is what we're talking about here, okay? You are in control. You decide who you are. And you do what you need to do.