REAL AF with Andy Frisella - The Art of Owning Your Life ft. Ryan Michler, with Andy Frisella - MFCEO217

Episode Date: February 27, 2018

My buddy Ryan Michler from Order of Man joins me in the studio and we get riffing on topics like accepting responsibility, mastering skills, and taking back control of your life, whether it's in the area of career or relationships or whatever. There’s a plague of victim mindset running through our culture and it has to be stopped. If you're infected by it, I can’t stop it for you. You have to do it yourself and in this episode we tell you how.

I can stack them hundreds to the roof. I ain't stopping till they stack to the moon. Without me, my family wouldn't have food. Anybody go against me, gotta lose. What is up, guys? You're listening to the MFCEO Project. I'm Andy. I'm your host, and I am the motherfucking CEO. Guys, today we have an awesome show. We have a guest who's actually been on our show before. He is the host of an extremely popular podcast called Order of Man. He's also the author of Sovereignty, which is an amazing book on how to take responsibility for your life. If you've read books like Extreme Ownership and things like that, you're going to love

this book. He's a good buddy of mine, and I'm going to introduce him right after I get to my buddy, Vanilla Ice. What's going on, dude? I've graduated to buddy status. Yeah. Well, not really. Not really. Okay. You said that. I'm glad you called me on that because you're definitely not my buddy. I'm a minion. Yes.

Minion. Of course. Yeah. That's good. No, I'm good, man. Thanks for calling me Vanella Ice. It's kind of, it's kind of phasing out the, uh, the other, uh, I still, I still like DJ God. DJ God. Yeah. DJ, DJ God. Yeah. That's a good one. I like how you always give the, uh, the echo. Yeah. That's all. That's like signature Andy. Dude, if we don't do the echo, it's not legitimate. That's true. If you're a DJ, you've got to have like the echo on. Absolutely. So I am curious with our guests. Uh, I mean, he's got a pretty amazing beard have the echo on. Absolutely. So I am curious with our guest. I mean, he's got a pretty amazing beard going on here.

He does. I think you cut it, though, didn't you? Yeah. I could tell. I let it go about three inches longer than I bring it up, but I think we started the last podcast just like this, too. Did we really? You can't avoid talking about this beard. I know.

I'm not very original. It's hard to miss, though. Yeah. As a lot of you probably guessed, because I know you listen to his podcast, which you should, we're here with Ryan Mickler. It's good to see you, man. You too. What's been going on?

Just life. Everything's been going on, man. The thing's blowing up. The book's doing good. You look like a completely different person, which is awesome. Yeah, it's been a while, dude. It has. I think last time I was out here was about a year and a half or so ago.

Yeah, I had just started getting my shit together. Yeah, you look good though, man. Thanks, man. I think last time I was out here was about a year and a half or so ago. Yeah, I had just started getting my shit together. Yeah, you look good though, man. Thanks, man. I've been hitting it. I'm down about 100 to 110 pounds depending on the day. For me, dude, I can weigh literally 10 pounds different depending on- Isn't that crazy? If I eat things with a lot of sodium or if I don't drink enough water. Yeah. I mean, dude, it'll be a 10 pound swing.

My wife gets pissed at me because she's doing the, she's doing the diet thing right now too. And I'll tell her, you know, Hey, I'm down three pounds the last couple of days. She's like, how do you do that? I'm like, I don't know. I think guys can just do that. The bigger you are, the easier you can fluctuate. That's true. That's true. But yeah, man, it's good. You know, uh, as you know, and you talk about in your book, you know, taking responsibility for whatever area you are is really a practice and, and discipline, you know? And I think for me, it's, it's, you know, people see the physical change, but the reality is, is that it's, it's been way better in every other area because it's,

it's sharpened that skill. You know what I mean? That discipline skill. Well, you can't make a, what discipline skill. Well, you can't make, what I found is like, you can't make a decision in a vacuum, right? So if you improve in this area of health, for example, then every other area, because it's the same skillset required here as it is over here in relationships or business

or whatever. Which kills me, man. Cause I see we're in the fitness industry and I see so many people who have this amazingly fit physique and the rest of their life is shit. Yeah. Like it's total shit.

And I'm just like, bro, you've obviously perspective these skills. All you have to do is apply them over here. You know what I mean? Right. That doesn't take a whole lot to figure out. You know what I mean?

But I guess it's the same for somebody who's got their business together and their fitness sucks. They don't realize that the same skills can literally be applied over in a different area and you're going to win. I mean, that or they get obsessed too, right? Like you can take something that's positive and take it over. Exactly.

Dude, fitness is not meant to be, it's not meant to be a fucking profession. It's meant to improve your life so you can do other stuff. That's right. That's what I was going to ask. Do you think in those cases, Andy, is that a case where somebody is living to train rather than training? Dude, I see a lot of people with addiction issues that they're like they're like at one point you'll see them and they've been you know um a substance abuser or they've been they've had some sort of

addiction and you see them turn to fitness and literally make it fucking a new addiction exactly you know and like dude there could be worse things that you're addicted to because I think people that have that addictive personality could be addicted in any area, you know? Grant Cardone actually talks about this because he was talking about the be obsessed or be average. He's like, man, I was screwed up and I just redirected that obsession. And you turn into healthy shit, right? Like, so I'm not saying that's a bad thing. I'm just saying, I see a lot of that and you know, you could take those people and take

that same obsessive nature and turn it into other things that would benefit them even more. Sure. You know what I mean? I don't think there's anything wrong with that when you turn it onto healthy things. I just say, I was simply stating that I observed that. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. And it's, what do you want to, right? Like, like I want other stuff. Like I want to be with my family. I want to hang out with you guys. Like I want to do other things too. In addition to being in the gym or to being one of the interesting things though about fitness when people become addicted to it in my experience is that that's all they want to talk about well that's like anything usually you take an alcoholic all they want to talk about is going to the bar you take someone

who does cocaine all they want to talk about is partying all night you know what party what's the next party what's the next this i think that you know i think that think that, you know, I think that's pretty normal. You know, if you've got somebody who's abusing heroin and they're fucking addicted to heroin, they're talking with their heroin buddies. You just don't hear it. Right.

You know what I mean? So I think that's pretty par for the course. Yeah. You know, people get dug into one thing and they're into it. Like, you know, gun people,

like they're into guns. Like I know friends, like I like guns, I love them, but they're not my fucking life. That's all I want to fucking talk about. You know what I mean? Like we see this with everything. Um, you know, it's fuck dude.

Like for me, cars, like all I ever want to talk about is really cars. Like, yeah, I talk about business shit cause I love it and I'm kind of addicted to that game. But you know, if you get me in a car conversation, I won't fucking shut up. You know what I mean? Like I'll keep going and going and going and going. And, and, you know, I think we all have the tendency to get way more involved in things than what we probably should. You know what I mean? Good and bad. Or think that other people care about it as much as we do. It's like, dude, I don't want to hear about that anymore. Dude, dude, it's, you know, being, you probably get this a lot just because, you know, you're somewhat of a public

figure. You've grown your podcast. You're, you you're you're i mean fuck dude it's grown tremendously since it's done good you came on the show for sure killing it and uh that's because i came on the show yes of course it's all me bro that's what it has nothing to do with you that's right my yeah so uh so um i think you know people will hear you though. People hear me that they like, cause they go overboard with shit. Right. Like they hear me and they hear me, they see, they're trying to like connect. Right. So like they hear a certain thing or this or thing, and like I could say it in passing. And then when I meet them, that's what they hang on to and want to talk about. And I'm like, bro, like, let's just not do that. You know what I

mean? Let's be fucking normal. I'm a normal motherfucker. Vaughn and I were actually talking about this at lunches. And I know you guys talk about the Astro Coles, right? And these guys who come up with all the exceptions and all the things. I've come to a point where I just block people like that. Dude, I don't, what was your phrase you said today? I liked that phrase. I don't have enough time to tell you everything i don't mean dude dude i had a lady come on my fucking uh post the other day and say i it was a post where i was sitting on the truck with that fucking uh revolver and it said it said the fucking post was a joke oh yeah on the bottom i saw that everyone who gets in your way and then it's just kidding don't do that yeah right at the

bottom it's a fucking joke and this lady goes that's a very triggered post considering there's so many mass shootings in america it's very irresponsible some shit like you know and you know what dude then get the fuck off my page right like i don't fucking need people like that on my page and then there people will be like when i say something back to them smart ass or put their comment they'll dm me and be like, when I say something back to them, smart ass or put their comment, they'll DM me and be like, Oh bro, you got to resort to put me on blast. Bro, you got to resort to being a fucking idiot on my page. Like, listen, I understand that I've got a lot of followers and I should probably behave more mature, but the fact of the matter is I'm just not. And if you fucking dumb, do some dumb shit on my page, I'm going to fucking put you on blast. I'm going to make you look stupid. And you know what? Everybody that follows me, like all of us listening right

now are probably going to fucking say you're an idiot too. You know? So like if you're looking for attention and you're looking for somebody to just blast you and get in your DMS and tell you you're a fucking idiot for a week, feel free to comment some dumb shit on my page. I'll put it up in my story and you'll fucking hate your life. You have to change your Instagram. Like, dude, I just don't have time for this shit no more. Like I don't, I'm not going to argue with you. I'm not like, uh, like, dude, I fucking saw, I had some people, that picture I posted with myself and all the girls a few days ago. Like I had people do two things. One, they're like, Oh, what's your fucking wife think about that well my wife was five fucking feet away so why don't you fucking ask her what she thought sorry i'm not

you know with some fucking jealous hag who fucking bust my balls about everything secondly i'd have i have i had a few people be like oh that's very interesting you know oh i saw that where's the diversity oh well i'm sorry that i took a picture with like nine of my white fucking friends i'm sorry if that offended you okay one was japanese if you think that that fucking reflects the diversity dude we're the most diverse fucking company when it comes to fucking who represents our brand and athletes than of any company and you know what i don't pick people because of their race i pick them because of the quality of human i don't buy in to force diversity? I don't pick people because of their race. I pick them because of the quality of human. I don't buy in to force diversity.

Yeah. I don't buy into it. And people think they're going to fucking guilt me into saying, oh, well, you should have, really? Should I have people just because they have a different color skin on my team? That's the only reason I should have them on my team? That's racism. If that's not racist, I don't know what the fuck it is.

That's racism. You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't see people like that. I don't think about people like that. I pick the quality humans who share our core values and could do the best fucking job. And you know what? Coincidentally, we are the most fucking diverse company because I look at it like that. Right. So I don't need you to tell me about diversity. When I take a picture with nine of my wife, I didn't even fucking notice it until people started saying it out. And I'm like, you know what, dude, that right there is the fucking problem. You're making it such an issue with every fucking thing that other people won't listen

to your fucking voice. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. It's like, like, dude, fucking 10 years ago, if you got called a racist, it was like the worst thing ever. Like you would do fucking anything to avoid it. Now it gets thrown around so loosely that people call you racist. You fucking laugh about it. You're like, Oh fuck. Yeah. I'm fucking racist. Clearly. You know what I mean? Like it's a fucking joke now because it's overused. It's thrown around

and it's applied to situations where it has nothing to do with relevancy. Right. And we have, we have fucking a situation now where that whole fucking term has now diluted its meaning to where it can't even be effective to make a fucking argument when in cases there really is that situation going on and dude well it's the same thing with that uh the me too movement with the me too movement which is legitimate with these women that are that are coming out have been sexually assaulted and there's legitimate cases and yet there's other women who are abusing that and it takes away from what this really means. That's right. That's right, dude. And, and you know,

I don't, I don't really care what people fucking think. Like the people who know me and people who are fucking around my company know how we operate and know that we fucking love and take in people that align with our core values, no matter what the fuck they look like. That's the whole basis of our fucking brand. Okay. But you know, I, the truth is, is I don't buy into forced diversity. I think it's fucking bullshit. I think that the, you should, I think that, do I think that there's people who oppress on racial issues? Absolutely. Sure. There's fucking sure is, but there's far more that don't. And by fucking trying to force that shit into people's fucking face, it gives them a bad taste in their mouth. It's just reality. You know, especially when you're trying to do the right

thing and you're doing the right thing. And then you get people that are fucking saying, Oh, where, where to fucking black people at in your photo? Well, you know what motherfucker, they were also standing five fucking feet away. it just so happened that randomly they weren't in the fucking photo right so so now i've got to fucking worry about what the fuck i do and and who i take pictures with so i gotta like so you're telling me i gotta look around and be like oh man there's no fucking black people i better get some black people in here otherwise i'm fucking racist right the fuck out of here you know what i'm saying i know what you're saying about that is anybody who makes those comments what do you think their life is usually like yeah everything is fucking everything that they fucking have those people that make that shit every fucking art every

bad thing that happens to them every fucking job they don't get every promotion they don't get every fucking traffic ticket they get it's because of racism sure i didn't get the fucking job because i'm black i didn't get the fucking job because i'm asian i didn't get the job because i'm american indian they passed me over for a while first of all motherfucker you know what business people fucking care about money you know what i you know how to you know how much i don't give a fuck about what color it is then people's skill set i want to fucking win i don't give a fuck about what color it is than people's skill set. I want to fucking win. I don't give a fuck if you're an alien. If you could come in and do the job better than everybody else, you're getting fucking paid. Right. And most businesses are like that. You know why? Because

there's a certain element of fucking greed and you want to make fucking money. And that's reality. I want to make the most money I could fucking make. And I don't give a fuck what color you are. If you are the best for the job, you're getting a fucking job. And I get it. Not everybody's like that. I get it. It's interesting. You're talking to one and you're talking one out of every fucking 1000 people, right? You know what I'm saying? So when you fucking punish the whole fucking group of people and that people will say, well, Andy, you don't know what it's like to be a minority. You know what? I fucking don't. But I know what it's like to look like a fucking idiot and have people look at the ground when they see your face because it's so fucked up. I know what it's like for people to fucking whisper behind your back because your face is

deformed. I know what it's like to fucking get stabbed in the fucking face because a fucking dude called the girl that I was with a fucking nigger. I know what that's like. That's how I got fucking stabbed. And for those motherfuckers to come and call me racist, fuck you. I almost fucking died for that shit. Fuck you. You come on my page and say that shit, you're getting fucking blocked. I paid my fucking price for that. I'm fucking, I am the fucking person who is on everybody's fucking team not the person that you yell at about no black people in the fucking picture because i happen to take a picture picture with a bunch of fucking white people it's bullshit and i'm sorry if that offends you get the fuck off

my podcast get the fuck off my page it's the truth so anyway it just irritated me you know what i'm saying i get it i get it i to be conscious of fucking who I take a picture with. Get the fuck out of here. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. That's the problem right here. They're just fine. I mean, everything they can be offended about, right?

Dude, it's not a bad problem either. It's an everybody problem. There's fucking white people like this. There's fucking Asian people. It's not a racially exclusive thing. Sure, sure. There's just people who will find a fucking problem with everything you do. Yep. 50% of the people who follow you on instagram not not just you ryan but any of you listening the ones who

don't comment the ones who fucking don't like your shit but they follow you you never see them comment you never see them like your shit until you do something that makes them upset right that's when you hear from them that's 50 of the people that follow you they are hoping for you to fuck up so that they can say something now with that being said i did have a good conversation with a man one of the men who said that about race and i explained my side of it and he was very fucking civil about it and we had you know what i started following him because i'm like all right this guy gets it he can have a conversation like an adult sure but 90 of the people that aren't like that they're they're just looking for you to fuck up they're looking for you to say something like i blocked a guy yesterday he was like he's like oh in quotes he's like i'm andy and i gotta say fuck so that i could sound manly

and be an alpha male and i'm thinking in my head i think i saw that one i'm like i'm thinking in my head i'm like first off my fucking podcast is called Motherfucking CEO. My license plate on my fucking Rolls Royce says MFCEO. If the word fuck bothers you, this is not the place for you. I'm sorry that I'm not going to curtail who the fuck I am and speak a way that appeases your fucking ears because you don't like the way I talk. Do I talk like this every fucking where I go? Is this how I talk or am I putting on a show? This is actually kind of light. Yeah. I mean, this is who the fuck I am. Like you can't curse this good without doing it all the time. You know what I'm saying?

I'll tell you what I was upset about your french fry post though, man. That's the one that really got me upset. The french fry? Yeah. Oh, yeah. I can't believe you would talk about wanting french fries.

Over nudes? Oh, my gosh. I mean, dude, come on. People are ridiculous. Yeah. Crazy stuff. People were upset about that. I know.

That's what I'm saying. Wait. There were really people upset about that? Legitimately people upset about that. They're like, dude, what the fuck are you talking about?

You know what's funny? All the people that were upset about it, about saying that, about not being nudes, like, oh, it's nudes, and they get mad. You know what? Those are motherfuckers. Don't get no nudes. I don't understand. What were they upset about?

I can't even conceive. I can't wrap my mind around what they were upset about. That you should be at a higher level of post or something like that. Yeah, they were saying, oh, it was bathroom humor? Yes, but what they don't understand is that I'm the king of bathroom humor. Like, I'm going to tell the fucking most inappropriate jokes to fucking you and my high school principal who is, we went to an all boys Catholic school. He's the most holy dude ever.

Guess what? I'm telling him the fucking dirtiest jokes possible. It's just how I roll. Right. You know what I'm saying? He's the second holiest dude and you know what that motherfucker he fucking laughs too they all laugh like dude it's funny i'm a fucking regular dude right and like you know what okay i thought that meme was funny it was funny because gary v doesn't show his personality on his fucking page and just because other guys don't doesn't mean i'm not gonna right

like if i think it's fucking funny i'm gonna fucking post it you know i thought it was funny dude i did too i thought it was great so and you know what those of you that don't have a sense of humor you can get the fuck off my page too by the way everybody who who doesn't have a sense of humor everybody who's gonna fucking make a big deal out of everything everybody who's gonna be an astral and be the guy who's like yeah but if you think about no shit it's called fucking context motherfucker if you If you don't understand it, go back to preschool where they teach you what that means. Right. Okay. All of you motherfuckers get the fuck off my page. I don't care how many followers I have. If that's 80% of my followers, then fucking see ya. I don't

fucking care. I do this for fucking me. I do this because I know that 99% of the people out there aren't going to do anything that I fucking tell them. They're not going to listen to anything I say. They're not going to fucking become anything I tell them to become. They're just going to shake their head. Yes. The one, there's going to be 1% of people that are going to fucking like I, like I got an email from yesterday, a guy who, uh, he owns a pool company and fucking Houston, Texas telling me how he literally giving me numbers like, Hey dude, I fucking did 200 grand last year. This year I did a mil last year to a million.

This year I'm gonna do 2.2 million. Wow. And he's like this, you know, I'm doing the work, but dude, I'm gonna tell you, this is, this is the shit that I learned from you. That's who I do this for. All the rest of you motherfuckers can fuck off for all I care. I don't really care. I really don't. Isn't that, that's weird. That 1% cause we were, I was talking about this as well. It's always been 1%.

I do it for the fucking 1% that's going to do it. Yeah. And the rep, that's why the Academy that I'm doing is fucking application only. I don't want all the motherfuckers who aren't going to do shit. Right. Right. And then at the end being like,

Oh, I fucking paid for your course. It didn't work. Bullshit. You do what I fucking tell you. You're I didn't get a result. Bullshit. You do what I fucking tell you, you're going to be wealthy. Period. But I'm going to fucking vet people to make sure they're going to fucking do it.

I need evidence that you're going to fucking do it. Yeah. Anyway. Well, before you wrap that up. I just got done with court. I had to literally go to court for a fucking stalker today and spend half of my fucking day in court. It was like Jerry Springer. Like it was fucking insane.

Like they literally hauled the person off to fucking jail because they threw a fucking fit in the fucking courtroom. Yeah. Or for mental evaluation or whatever. I don't know where the fuck they were going. But all I know is I spent half my day dealing with fucked up shit. And right now I don't give a fuck who you are. If you're not fucking down with me, get the fuck off my page.

I'm sick of people. You know what I'm saying? Like, dude, if you're not fucking down with what I'm down with, with domination and fucking competing and winning and fucking all the shit I talk about, go follow fucking somebody else. There's plenty of fake motherfuckers out there to tell you all the bullshit you want to hear.

Yes, sir. You know what I'm saying? Oh, yeah. Hey, I'm a fucking entrepreneur. Here's my fucking, here's my rented fucking car. And the Amazon money they buy, right? Yeah.

Fuck. Anyway, I know there's going to be a lot of people that are going to be like, dude, you should rant like that more often. And there's going to be a lot of people being like, Andy, you're better than that. If you're going to send me an email

that says you're better than that, you're going to fuck off my page too. You know what I'm saying? Because, you're better than that. If you're going to send me an email that says you're better than that, you get to fuck off my page too. You know what I'm saying? Because I ain't better than that. I'm a normal motherfucker, man. I drink fucking beer and whiskey. You know, I like to make a lot of money. I like to drive fast cars. I'm a fucking normal red blooded motherfucker. If you don't like it, fuck you. That's it. I don't fucking care. I really don't. But I think that's probably part of the reason that so many people do connect with you because I think the fake stuff that we see a lot

will resonate for a short period of time until people realize it's crap. I'm not going to show you one aspect of me. I'm incapable of that. Like, I love Gary, but Gary shows one aspect of himself. And I even talked to him about this. I said, Gary, if you showed your real personality,

not saying he's showing fake personality because he is who he is, but if you showed a little bit more humor or a little bit more, you know, not always Gary, dude, people will fucking resonate with him a lot more. He would reach 10 times as many people. I agree. You know what I'm saying? And I love Gary. I've told him this and I wouldn't say it.

I wouldn't say it if I hadn't fucking discussed it with him already, you know? And I think, you know, I'm conscious of who he is and his family and not wanting to show that because dude, that's, it's a liability for him. He's a fucking famous dude. Yeah. Right. But show a little bit more shit that you're bad at. Show a little bit, show a little bit of goofy shit.

You know, let's see your humor a little bit. Like, you know what I mean? Like, I know exactly what you mean. People will like, so, so don't always try. Like, I'm not talking about just him, but I'm saying I'm never going to be that guy. Right. I don't want to be, I'm not fucking, I don't fucking care to be. I have no interest in being like that. Like I'm a fucking goofy motherfucker. Like if you're not down with that too, see ya. I don't care. Right. You know what I mean? So I just do people a favor and just block them when they complain

about anything. I fucking block them. I'm going all in on my corniness. Huh? I'm going all in on my corniness. You've lit a fire in me. You haven't yet? That's a good point, Ryan. I'm already all in. No shit, man.

Yeah. You're starting to look like a fucking corn cob. I am starting a little bit. Yeah. I don't even know what that means. Your fucking head looks like a corn kernel. Well, yeah. I need to shave it.

I've been too lazy. Yeah. I got to get back to the slick look. What's that have to do with like a corn kernel. Well, yeah, I need to shave it. I've been too lazy. I got to get back to the slick look. What's that have to do with fucking a corn kernel? Do you eat hairy corn kernels? No, I'm saying because I assume you're talking about the fact that I got a little fuzz growing up here. No. Oh, no?

But that shit is silver, though. It is? Oh, yeah. No, it's silver. That's part of it. That's silver shit. That's way more silver than me. Yeah, I know.

It's very silver. Oh, you're older than me, though. I'm like, what, six years older than you. I forget that you're older than me. Yeah, yeah. I know's very silver. Oh, you're older than me, though. I'm like, what, six years older than you. I forget that you're older than me. Yeah. Yeah. I know it's because I'm so youthful. How old are you?

44. Yeah, you are fucking six years older than me. Yeah. God damn, dude, you're old. I am old. Fuck. I am old, but I'm aging like wine. Oh, God.

Here we go. Let's hear what you were saying. You're going to get corny, though. No, no, I'm gonna go in all in i'm gonna embrace everything all right yeah so let's actually talk about something i i do but listen just in the outside chance that we have new people who haven't heard of ryan you should probably give you a little two minute spiel dude if you haven't heard ryan go fucking google google this shit ryan's a fucking legend he is is a legend. Thank you. Yeah. I appreciate a few words about yourself. Uh, this is my, this is my moment right here. Yeah. Well, I started this

organization three years ago. Um, because I, I was messed up quite honestly. Uh, what we talked about that we've talked about that before is man, I didn't, I didn't have things figured out. I went through a separation with my wife. I blamed her a lot of the time. And, uh, through that process, I learned to take responsibility for my own life and accountability for, from my own stuff. And it's really interesting as I tell that story about the separation specifically, a lot of people will always say things like, Oh, well it takes two to tango and your wife's this, and she's probably screwing around with other guys. And I'm like, you know, sometimes it doesn't take two. It takes one to be influential,

tolerated your shit for so long that they are totally justified. Kick you the fuck out. Exactly. And that, you know what, that's where I was at. And what's really interesting is as, as I went on this journey to fix myself, not her, cause I tried that and that didn't work. I tried to manipulate, coerce, do everything I could to win her back. That didn't work. I went to work on myself and she responded to that. Well, it's amazing that whenever you create a great product, people come. Right. It's not just in relationships.

Exactly. People focus too much on what they're going to try to get versus like, dude, like I get this all the time. I actually just had a message about this. I get these young dudes who ask about relationships all the time because let me be real, dude, like I get this all the time. I actually just had a message about this. Like I get, I get these young dudes who ask about relationships all the time because let me be real, dude. A lot of you guys who are between the ages of 20 and 25 have no fucking clue about how to talk to people or how to meet women and treat women.

Yeah. So I get, for some reason I get a lot of fucking questions. I don't know why. Cause it's not like I'm out there fucking, you know, putting it out there. Yeah. Right. Yeah. You've gotten quite a few through the for sale effect about relationships right oh really

like but like specifically like how to pick up girls that's where i want to get most of the ones i've i've gotten for you yeah dude they've all been almost the same thing man my my girlfriend's just not supportive what should i do and it's like you're fucking canter ass dude like how many times have you talked about listen if your girlfriend has to support you and you're having good intentions of what you're doing, of what you're, like, dude, if you're a shit bag, then she probably shouldn't support you. Right. But you have to have the awareness to know

if you're a shit bag or not. If you're not a shit bag and you're doing the right things and you're doing things for your 10 year from now self and she's not supporting you because she wants to go to the movies and then when you go to the movies, she bitches about how you can't get the large popcorn because you don't have any fucking money. Guess what? Get fucking rid of her. Right. But there's a difference though, too, because here's what I've seen is guys will go

out and start a business and they'll say, oh, my wife doesn't support me in the business. I'm like, dude, you can't even take out the trash when you say you're going to. Like, why would she put her livelihood and potentially your kids in your hands when you can't do the small shit right. That's dude, that's a valid point, right? You know, I, I, but far more often what I see is guys who are hanging on. People don't really grasp this concept until they're older, right? Like until you're like mid thirties or at least in your thirties, you can't really understand that people are going to come in and out of your life, Yes. Right. There's phases. It's chapters. Okay. There's nothing wrong with that. Like that's why,

like when you're younger and you break up with a girl, you're like, usually you end up hating her because you're like, you fucking smash my dreams and my life and this and that because you don't realize the perspective, right? You're going to have chapters. You're going to have chapter one.

You're going to have chapter two. You're going to have chapter three. Some people have hundreds of chapters if you know what I'm saying. Okay. But people, all people have chapters. Right. And if you look at relationships as chapters, sometimes when you get to the end of the chapter, what happens? You fucking close the book. It's over. And you move forward to chapter two. And dude, it took me a long time to realize that. Like when I was dating girls in my twenties, like if we would break up, I would, cause like I had built up this huge fucking future in my head. Right. So I'm like, I'm like, when we break up, I'm like this whole, my whole life is over.

And I don't realize that what I'm doing is actually, I'm throwing something that didn't even exist in the trash and thinking that my whole entire life is this i'm i'm in love with the idea of it as opposed to what it really is right or what it could be the potential of it and young people tend to do this because they don't have the perspective and so they they hang on to these temporary things these temporary relationships and let those temporary relationships affect their actions now which causes them to be unsuccessful 10 years from now you see what i'm saying sure yeah and dude i see this so much with young dudes man because like let's be real like these young dudes they don't have a lot of experience with

girls they go out they fuck one chick and they're like oh my god dude i'm in love i got my first fucking tail and i'm, I'm fucking marrying her and I'll never get another one again because you went for 18 years without getting it. But guys, it's not going to be another 18 years, bro. That's just the way it goes. Our first 18 years or 14 or 15, that seems like a long fucking time. Well, and the other thing too, is you're going to, you're going to continue to learn the lesson until you learn the lesson. Like you have to keep going through it. If you keep finding yourself in the same situation over and over and over again, you haven't learned anything. Ryan, what happens when you read a chapter of a book? Usually or what? You learn

something. You learn and then you advance to the next step. Sometimes it takes people four chapters to figure out what it is they learn and what they want. Sometimes it takes people 10 chapters. Sometimes it takes people one chapter. But the reality is, it's different for everybody. And if you hang on to someone who is stifling your ability to do what's good for 10 years from now you, you're in a bad situation. Because I've seen people ruin fucking big chunks of their life based upon the idea of hanging on to something that should have been temporary. Sure. You know what I mean? Yeah, that makes sense.

Yeah, absolutely. So, Ryan, you had this awakening kind of, kind of. Yeah. Yeah. And you know, again, to go back is, is she started responding to that. People started responding to that. I started to share my story. And as I did that, um, I, I noticed there was a lot of guys out there that were going through very, very similar things that I did, um, that were not taking responsibility, accountability, ownership of their life. And, uh, I felt like through not taking responsibility, accountability, ownership of their life. And I felt like through what I shared with them gave them permission to do the same thing. And so in March of 2015, so just about three years ago, I launched this organization designed to help men become better men, better fathers, husbands, business owners, community leaders.

And it's been a really cool ride. And it's cool to get messages from guys and even their wives that, Hey, my husband has completely transformed his life. I don't know what you do in that little quote unquote man club, but it's awesome. Let me ask you this too. Cause like, this is getting a lot of, this is getting a lot of hate lately too. Oh dude, what are you a fucking man guru? You've got a big beard. You know how to be a man. Like, what's funny about knowing you is that, like, dude, it's the fucking complete opposite. You know what I'm saying? I'm on a journey, man.

Right. And I tell people, because they'll say, well, what makes you qualified? I'm like, other than I'm a man and I want to be better at being a man, that's my quality. And I've been through some shit. Right. And I learned. And I learned. That made my life better.

Right. That's what qualifies me. I don't have a degree. I don't have, you know, you don't even have to believe what i say like it's my opinion so many people they see they see you because you do have a big beard and shit and they think they do this to whalen too like oh yeah whalen and they think oh yeah you know oh you think you're some sort of alpha male because you have a beard and you fucking shoot guns and you you like being around woods and shit like that has nothing to do with yeah like I know both of you guys real well.

And it's funny because it's, it's, it shows people's limited thinking. Like, like, cause you guys do kind of fit into the stereotype. Of course. You look like fucking Paul Bunyan.

Yeah. Well, it's true. And I was considering wearing a flannel shirt today, but I was like, I probably shouldn't do that. Yeah. You'd be like the bounty dude.

I wish. Yeah. Anyways. Yeah, it is. And I, and I tell people there's more behind the, than behind the beard.

Way more. But, uh, yeah. So you were doing, so how long have the beard. Way more. But yeah, it's been a good ride, man. So how long have you actually done that? It just so happens that beards are fucking awesome. Well, I like, that's, people ask me, why do you have a beard? I like my beard. Yeah. I mean, why do you put your hair that way?

I mean, that's because you like it. Yeah. I'm glad the beards are finally starting to fade away, though. It's like, like the true beard guys, they still got them, but everybody that was on the fad. There's a lot of like pretty beards out there. Yeah. I caught like where they're like overly like done. I'm like, yeah, that's not a beard, man. You know what I mean? Like keep it nice, keep it straight, but it's not supposed to be pretty. Yeah. I hear you. So you were doing the podcast for what, two or three years. And then,

and then your experience doing that, I assume is just kind of fed into this new book that you're, you wrote. Yeah. I mean, that book is probably the experiences that I've had over the past 10 years or so of taking ownership and responsibility of my life. And if you look at sovereignty, you look at what the root word is, reign, rule. And that's the purpose. You rule over your life.

But so many people have given up power and authority over their own lives. They give it to their bosses and their wives and their parents or the economy or the president or my health or whatever reason people come up with and all the excuses they come up with. And when they do that, when they say, oh, it's because Andy, my boss, isn't doing X, Y, and Z. What they do is they give all the power to Andy instead of maintaining the power to be able to do their own thing, to live their own life and to have their own success.

I think most people are afraid of being in control. Oh, yeah. Dude, that's why most people want to be led. Right. They don't, like, leaders struggle with this a lot. Like, there's certain leaders that have the right mentality about leading that when they first start leading,

they have trouble understanding why somebody would listen to them. Sure. But what you have to understand as a leader is that most people need direction. They have to be led. They have to be shown what to do because they haven't put any time in figuring out who the fuck they are. Right. So if that's most people, how would you suggest that most people who aren't maybe natural born leaders, like how can they still exercise sovereignty over their own lives? When you're talking about natural born leaders, how can they still exercise sovereignty over their own lives?

When you're talking about natural born leaders, I think what, and I'm assuming what you're talking about is leading other people. I'm not talking about leading other people. I'm talking about leading yourself and all that other stuff. That's where true leadership starts.

100%. Yeah. We call this influence, right? The more that I can control myself and be powerful over myself, the more, and we were talking about this at lunch, the more people will- They recognize they'll, they'll recognize it. And then they'll choose

to be influenced by you. So how does someone become a leader? Lead yourself first and let that other stuff take care of itself. Most in the world. They're the people who exhibit the most discipline in their lives. A hundred percent. You know what I'm saying? They're the people who, when you go to dinner with them and they're on a diet, they don't, they don't make it a big deal and say, Oh, I'm fucking this and this and this.

They just say, no, thank you. Right. You know what I mean? Yep. It's like they're, they're making the decisions and it's clear that they're making the decisions.

They have the principle and everybody's every, and I made a post about this the other day. It's like, if you're principled only when it's convenient, you're not really principled. Right. And that's what most people do is like, Oh, I'm a post about this the other day. It's like, if you're principled only when it's convenient, you're not really principled. Right. And that's what most people do is like, Oh,

I'm a diet except for when I'm traveling or I'm going to really hit the gym hard except for when, you know, again, I'm, I'm out of town or I'm going to, they don't make a big deal out of it. Right.

They don't have to like let the world know about it. No, just go do their business, go do their thing. Yep. You know, and those are the people that get the most respect because they are leading themselves to the outcome that they want and other people recognize it.

It's very easy to recognize. Right. And while you or I might look at somebody and like, I definitely identify it. I'm like, all right, this guy's a fucking, this guy's got a shit together.

He's a leader. Other people are mystified by it and they're just like, how do you do that? Yeah. The X factor, right? He's got it. I want to be like him because they sense it.

Yep. You know what I mean? It's a sense of confidence and belief in yourself that is contagious to other people. Sure. Yeah. There's a great quote, I think, that you used to open up one of the chapters. And I forget. I think it was by Emerson. Something about self-mastery is true freedom.

And I think so many people think of discipline and holding yourself to certain standards. They almost see that as like a constraining thing, whereas reading your book, you're saying, that's not constraining. That's liberating. That's true freedom. It is restraining, but it's imposed limitations, right? Because you impose your own restrictions, if you will, like, for example, food or getting up early. Those are your own parameters that you've created in your life. And because you've chosen them, you are not subjecting yourself to unknown

and unexpected consequences of not establishing those parameters. And that's the differences. And I think the quote you're referring to is Aristotle. He says, through discipline comes freedom. Jocko Willink says, discipline equals freedom. Same concept. If you can be disciplined, self-disciplined, then you will be free to do what it is you decide you want to do, which goes to your point of most people don't know what they want or who they are. And then they're more at the mercy of their indecision.

Yes. You see what I'm saying? And that's how your life ends up. A million miles off fucking track from where you just wanted it to be because you're not at the mercy of your actual control and your decisions. You're at the mercy of your indecision, which means what you ultimately are as at the mercy of, of the effects of other people's decisions. Right, right. Oh, we want to go to dinner. Oh fuck dude. I can't go to dinner because I don't have the discipline to stick to my program.

So now it's so-and-so's fault because I went out and drank 12 beers and ate like shit when I shouldn't have. Right. So now your life is literally physically being affected by other people's decisions and your lack of decision. Yeah, and I mean, it's important that we learn to be decisive. Because if you don't decide and you don't lead yourself, you will be led. Oh, absolutely. Whether you choose to be led or not. Or somebody imposes it upon you.

That's right. I mean, it's even as little as talking about the food thing is like, you know, somebody says, hey, let's go out to lunch. They say, where do you want to go? I don't know. Wherever you want to go. No, make a decision. Right.

Like, I want to go to this restaurant. If somebody has a problem with that. Or I want to go somewhere where I can get this. Right. Make a decision, please. Or what do you want to do this weekend? No, like, what do you want to do? Let's go do that. If they have a problem, then they'll figure it out.

But bro, most people can't even make that simple decision. It's crazy. It's crazy. You know, the fucking number, the number one argument in relationships is what? Where you want to eat. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? I'm sure.

I'm sure. Right. You know what I'm saying? I'm sure. Right. You know, like a dude, most men and women, both, because this applies to women too. I thought, yep. They can't make a decision as simple as where do you want to eat.

Right. And then they wonder why they can't make the big decisions. They'll be like, okay. Then when the decision gets made, okay, I want to go here. No, I don't want to go there. That doesn't sound good.

And then it starts a fight. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Listen, if you don't fucking care, that means we're going where I fucking want to go. Yeah. In't sound good. And then it starts a fight. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Listen, if you don't fucking care, that means we're going where I fucking want to go. Yeah. In my house,

that's what that means. Right. You know what I'm saying? Emily and I just got an argument about this. We never argue. Like, dude, there was,

where do you want to go? And there was nothing open. And I said, all right, we're going here. She's like, no, I don't want to go there. You know where we went? We went fucking home.

We ate whatever the fuck was there. Yeah. I'm not fucking doing it. You know what I mean? Like, dude, I'm not going to fucking sit there and play that game. It's so frustrating. I mean,

it really, but then people wonder why, you know, they can't make a big decision or why they can't have a difficult conversation with somebody on a meaningful topic. It's because you can't do the small stuff. Therefore you can't do the big stuff. Right,

right. Yeah, dude. You know, it took me a long time to get comfortable having difficult conversations. That shit doesn't come natural to anybody. Nobody wants to do that. Firing somebody. The first time I fired somebody, I fucking cried. Yeah. Like I got my truck and I fucking cried because I felt fucking terrible. Yeah. Nobody wants to do that stuff. Now, you know what?

I've accepted that if they got fired, it's their fucking fault and that's it. Right. You know what I'm saying? And it's your fault if you don't. That's right. No. And that's where it changed for me. Where it changed for me was when I figured out that if i if i usually when you have to fire someone everybody else knows why they should be fired too and if you don't your team loses respect and when i figured that out i fucking now i'm like fuck it yeah yeah yeah you know and it's better for that individual anyways fuck yeah it is because i'm holding them back from an opportunity they could potentially be great at exactly doing it exactly you. You know, and that's, that's usually what I tell them. Not all of them understand it, but they will hopefully at some point, but yeah.

Yeah. Ryan, from that moment that you were, you explained that you were kind of sobbing and you looked at the, and I forget if you said that or if I read that in your book, I think I would say sobbing. That doesn't sound like a word I would use. All right. Well, you said you were, you were weeping or you were emotional by yourself when you were separated. Dude, guys with beards don't fucking cry, man. That's true. I'm sorry. What the fuck are you reading down there? Well, I didn't have a beard then, so I did cry.

But in any case, you said you basically mix it up all his books. I am. I read so many. Ryan eats fucking nails and glass from breakfast. That's right. That's true. Never. But you basically made that change, right? You decided that you were going to stop blaming other people and take personal responsibility.

But obviously from that point to now, you learned how to master yourself. Sure. And I would just take us through that process. Like what are the steps to self-mastery in your opinion? Man, that's a tough one. And it's like, it doesn't look about it. Yeah. Well, part of it to self-mastery in your opinion? Man, that's a tough one. And it's like, it doesn't- Well, you're gonna look about it, so you should know. Yeah, well, part of it is self-mastery. I mean, there's a lot more to it than that, obviously.

But pick something, pick anything. For me, it happened to be the gym. And so I decided, I remember I came home one night and my boys were tugging on my pant leg and they're like, dad, dad, dad, let's go jump on the trampoline. And I had to look him in the eye and say, sorry guys, I can't. Like I literally could not go jump on the trampoline because I was

exhausted. And that moment right there was the moment that it changed for me because I had a clear vision to your point, Andy, earlier about what I wanted. I want to be around. Like I want to jump on the trampoline with my kids. That was important to me. And so I went into the gym every single day. And I've been doing that for, at this point, five, six years. And I've been 90% of the days. That's important. That discipline has led me to be more disciplined in the business, has led me to be more disciplined in my relationship, every single facet of life. So pick something and start being disciplined towards that thing. Do the activities that you know you need to be doing and do it every single day.

That to me is the key. If you can do it every single day, that's where you'll start to notice change. It can't be some activity that you have to do on a weekly basis or a monthly basis. It has to be done every single day. That's where you start to develop those patterns and habits. Nice. Nice. I like that you said know what you want first and then know what kind of life you want. Know what your why is.

You do. And that might change. And certainly it does. We talk about chapters, you know, like, am I going to be doing this for 30 years? Probably not. And people say, well, Ryan, what's this going to look like in 10 years? I'm like, I don't even know what I'm having for dinner tonight. Yeah. All that I know is this is what I want right now. And I'm working hard toward it. Absolutely. And in a year, there might be some other opportunity there. It might be some other thing. But everything that I'm learning about this business and the way that I run myself is going to translate into whatever else may come up. You guys were lamenting people's indecisiveness though. But dude, you know that we get this all the time. People say, man, I have this great work ethic.

I'm super passionate, but I just can't decide what to do. What do you, what do you tell people like that? That's what I say. You want to be honest? The honest truth is, is that when people say that, I know the first two things that you said are bullshit. Yeah, that's a good point. Cause that what they're doing is they're fucking taking the mentality or the point of I don't have something to do. And they're using it as an excuse for why I wasted all this potential when it's bullshit. You don't have the fucking potential. If you had a hard work ethic, if you had a fucking drive, if you had all this shit, guess what? You'd find something to fucking do.

You're doing it already. Right? That's a good point. And you know what? You would make a fucking decision a lot of people hide behind that because they're like i have all the skills but but i'm not i don't know what to do you would be doing something when i when i didn't know what to do guess what i did something right like i fucking did something like dude i sold baseball cards i sold light bulbs door to door i fucking did internet yellow pages.

I fucking sold snow cones. I fucking painted stripes on parking lots. I worked construction. I fucking, dude, I did a ton of things. I did something. Right. You be doing something. You know what you know that they don't, though, is that I think, and we run into people like this all the time, too.

They're like, well, what if I start with this? And then in six months, I realized this was stupid. I i shouldn't have done this you know that it's better to have done that that's part of the process yeah you're gonna fucking pick dude you're gonna pick something dude you are going to pick something and guess what you're gonna fucking fail right and you're going to fucking fail you are not hitting a grand slam on day one you're not getting inducted to the hall of fame and won it fucking in bat okay you're going to strike the fuck out and guess what's going to happen when you strike the fuck out you're going to learn something you're going to say man i don't want to do that again right and guess what you're not going to do that again and then you're going to do that three or four

more fucking times where you're going and maybe you do stay like for me, the mistakes I make, this is why I'm getting into business at a young age is a great idea because you, you are going to fuck it up, but you don't have any obligations. You don't have a family. You don't have a house. You don't have a mortgage, you know, so you're, you're free to fuck shit up and still keep going. You know what I mean?

It doesn't bury you. And, um, you know, so many people spend so much time trying to find the plan that they're not going to fuck up that, that they never start anything. Right. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. It doesn't exist. I mean, I can give you an example with the book. I get a lot of people now that that book's out and they'll say, well, how do you write a book? I'm like, what do you mean? Like you just write, like that's how you write a book. And I wrote, dude, go back and listen to the first fucking episodes. The first five episodes of the MSCL project. They're fucking terrible. Horrible, right? I leave them up as an example that I

didn't know what the fuck I was doing. Like honestly, a smart person would take those down and redo them in the new format, the first 50 episodes episodes but they were so fucking bad you know why because i didn't know what the fuck i was doing but you figured it out because you did it like i guess i figured it out i don't know i'm still well you know millions of people would say that you have i don't know like dude to me like i don't come in here thinking i have it figured out i'm like fuck dude i maybe i don't have figured out but the point is i've learned shit that has gotten me to get better. Right, exactly. I might not have figured out still.

I'm not fucking, I'm not ranked up there with Joe Rogan, which is where I want to be. You know, part of the reason is, is because I got some freeloaders that fucking listen and never click subscribe or leave a review or tell a fucking friend. But I won't bring that up. I love when he talks about the early, the the early podcast because you get in your mind, like you imagine Andy in the very first episode going, hey guys, I'm Andrew. No, I fucking ran in full steam.

What's that? I ran in full steam. Like dude, I didn't fucking hold back. I still have my first YouTube video up for that same reason. I look at it and once in a while I'm like, dude, that is ridiculous. Dude, you know what? When I first started recording fucking audio and video and shit, I can remember because

we had a guy here who worked in our office who was a seasoned anchor, a news anchor for many years and he ended up quitting. His name was Tim Tialdo. Really cool dude. Good guy. But I remember like, dude, he used like, he would be like, okay, we're going to make a video about this. This is before you were even down here at Tyler and a fucking,

I'd be like, all right, so what do I got to say? Like, do I say it like this? Do I say it like that? Do I do it like this? He's like,

dude, just fucking do it. And I'm like, I don't know how to do it. Like, I remember when I came last time, uh, Vaughn gave you a topic for Thursday thunder.

Yeah. And I was sitting here cause I think we had just done the podcast or something and he just gave you a topic and you just riffed. Yeah. I was blown away. I'm like, dude, that was awesome. But you had to earn that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And now if you listen with two original top first three or four Thursday Thunders, you listen to one now it's fucking night and day. Yeah. Like I don't even have to even like, and dude, people think those are cut. Those are fucking not edited. Those are fucking straight through, you know? And, um, but the point is, is like, dude, we all suck when we start something new.

Right. Like you just have to be willing to suck. So many people ruin their whole lives because they're so afraid of sucking at something like, dude, if you were afraid of sucking at something, guess what? You are by default going to suck at your whole entire life forever forever you just resigned to yes and you're gonna that's that's the default and you're gonna get to be 80 or 90 or whatever you end up living and you're gonna be like fuck i didn't do anything i didn't have the balls do anything i didn't i couldn't do anything

i i fucking i dude i sucked and you're to have to deal with that. You sucked because you were too big of a pussy to try anything. Yeah. Like it's funny because like when, when, when you walk as a kid, you were literally, literally fall down a thousand fucking times, but not one time. Do you ever cross your mind? Like, Hey, maybe fucking walking isn't for me. I'm just gonna scoot around on my butt. You know what I'm saying? Like it doesn't happen. Right. But as we get older, like one or two things happen, like you, you end up being bad at something. And like a group of kids makes funny. You're right. Like, right. And you, and, or you do something that everybody else seems to get that you don't get. And then your teacher or somebody you look up to comes up and says, Andy, you know what? That's just not your fucking thing. Like it's not your thing. And you believe it because you trust the person. Yeah. And you don't want to get laughed at by the

kids anymore. So you're like, you start to believe, well, there's things that aren't for me. And you know what? In real life, there are things that aren't for you. If you're fucking, you know, five foot tall and you can't dribble a basketball, you're probably not going to be LeBron James in 20 years or 100 years okay but for most things especially in business you can get pretty fucking good at something with just a little bit of common sense and skill and uh if you if you could touch a hot stove and realize to not touch it again and you're persistent if you have those two skills your ability to fucking not do dumb

shit twice and your ability to put time in, there's really no limit to how successful you can be. You know what I mean? But dude, because we learn along the way that we're going to get laughed at if we do something stupid or we're going to get made fun of, or we believe that certain things just aren't for us, we end up not doing anything. But to your point about setting huge, unmanageable goals, you're right. The five foot one, you know, skinny, unathletic white kid, AKA me, it's not going to become LeBron James, but if he dedicates himself to perfecting his shot, he's going to get it on a team. He's obsessive and he's going to be good at some level. Right. He'll be good at high school or he'll be good. Dude, that's exactly right. And that's a good point. Like, dude, if you

translate that to entrepreneurship, not everybody on here is going to be fucking Steve jobs. I certainly am not right. I'm not in fucking, I'm not going to be fucking Steve jobs or fucking Warren Buffett or some shit like that. Like that's not me. Well, it has to be, I mean, those big dreams have to be relevant too. Right. I mean, realistic or one thing that's, that's not me. Well, it has to be, I mean, those big dreams have to be relevant too, right? Right. I mean, realistic or one thing, that's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about,

it's actually got to be relevant. Do you even want to be LeBron James? No, I fucking don't. Or Steve Jobs. Dude, I don't want to be Gary Vee. Exactly. You know what I'm saying? Like, dude,

like Gary and I own the same size companies, like almost the exact same size. And I don't have to fucking do none of the shit that he has to do. I don't have to fly over the fucking world. I don't have to take 25 meetings a day. Dude, I get up, I fucking go to the gym. I work out in my fucking local gym. Nobody fucking bugs me. Everybody there's cool as fuck. You know what I'm saying? Like I work out, I go home, I fucking change a shower. I come to work. I hang out with my dudes. I make some fucking YouTube videos and a couple of fucking podcasts. And I get paid a lot when I do decide to go speak. I'm cool with

that. You know what I'm saying? I'm not trying to make 40 fucking pieces of content every day. And that goes back to knowing what we want, right? Right. Like it's just not what I want. And dude, people are like, oh dude, you need to do this and that. And this dude, if I wanted to be doing it, guess what? I'd be fucking doing it. Right. It's purposeful living. Right. You know what I'm saying?

And like a lot of these guys, these entrepreneur gurus out there, like I see them doing like, cause Gary's built a good following with what he's done. And he, Gary legitimately loves what he does. And I respect that. Right. You know, I respect anybody that loves what they do and they know what they want. And Gary loves what he does. I just don't want that. Right. And I see a lot of people out there who have very little experience in

anything trying to emulate what that guy does. And I'm going to tell you right now, you're not going to see those people around in a year from now. You know why? Because they're going to burn the fuck out. Right. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. He's a fucking alien, dude. It's crazy. And like, it's legitimate too. Like he's, that's not a fucking act he's like that that's what he loves and i see so many people out there being inauthentic and trying to it's such a bad business strategy anyway because like dude you're not leverageable it's not you're not gonna you're not gonna out amazon amazon you're not gonna out gary v gary v right you know what i'm saying exactly you gotta find out who the fuck you are and you gotta make a purposeful decision to be that and be be that you know i'm saying exactly you got to find out who the fuck you are and you got to make a purposeful decision to be that and be be that you know what i'm saying and the thing about it

too is like dude we see that shit with you and whalen like oh yeah with dudes dudes who are like all of a sudden they're fucking man coaches right and they fucking try to look like you guys and talk like you guys and although you guys have completely different styles and i respect both of you it's you know uh it's a bad strategy, dude. That space is fucking filled. Right. You know what I'm saying? Do it. You're doing, you're, it's going to be, not only is it going to be more profitable for you, it's just, you're going to live a more fulfilled life. Exactly. Dude, you know how happy I am that like I could fucking, like I can be walking through a casino in Vegas and be fucking shit face and people fucking see me and come talk to me and they expect me to be like that.

You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't have to be like, oh my God, like. That's funny. Clean up. Yeah. Like, oh shit, I better fucking not be me. Like, you know, they see me walking through the casino. Like last time I was there, I was walking through somewhere with, with fucking my buddy

Ryan. We were walking through, dude, we were both fucking hammered. We had been drinking all fucking night. And like dude comes up he's like andy what's up bro and i'm like dude like it was like you know i don't have to be like oh shit yeah i'm having fucking fun right everybody knows i do that shit you know you right yeah and like dude you have to that's where the people fuck up right like that's where they fuck up in like like dude like imagine like imagine oprah winfrey okay and let's say you know oprah winfrey and let's say i don't know anything about oprah like lewis knows her and some other guys know her i don't know her never met her but let's say you

fucking were walking through a vegas hotel and you see oprah winfrey just fucking hammered oh yeah you'd be like oh my god oprah was fucking. The camera would be out. Like, yeah, right. Yeah. You know, because she doesn't present herself in that manner. And like, dude, if you're not authentic with who you are, eventually you're going to get fucking caught. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like eventually you are going to get fucking put on blast. You're going to, we see it with celebrities all the time, you know? So if you're out there trying to build a personal brand and you're trying to be like what you're doing, like, let's say you're on a mission to help men be better. And then all of a sudden somebody sees you out with another girl.

I go have an affair. Right. Dude, you're fucking ruined. Done. Right. So you better be exactly who the fuck you say you are. Otherwise you're going to fucking lose everything. Eventually you're going to get caught, you know? And that's why I don't fucking keep anything from anybody. I fucking, you know,

like I said, in the beginning of the show, it is what it is. If you don't like it, go do your own show. And you know, it's, you know,

the thing about that too. I mean, talking about Gary, like he's not right or wrong. It's just, it's his thing. He knows that too. Right.

And he says that it's like, this is not, if this is not for you, that's, I'm not telling you, this is the way you need to do it. This is the way I do it. Dude, I've heard him say multiple times, I'm not trying to encourage people to be just like me.

I'm trying to encourage people to be just like them. Yes. And dude, but people don't get what that means because they haven't figured out who the fuck they are. Right. You know what I mean? And ultimately, man, before you take up responsibility or master fucking anything, you've got to make a decision about who you are. Like on last week's podcast, we had Charlie on Charlie fucking talked about creating a character in your mind and then being that character. And people hear that and they think, well, that's being

not authentic. No, it's not. That's living with intention. That's becoming who you are on purpose. Right. Completely different thing. People hear fine, people hear, I'm going to figure out who I am, or I'm going to go find who I am. And what they actually do is instead of consciously deciding who they are and becoming that, they go out and they look for validation from the world to tell them who they should be. And then they never feel complete on the inside because they're not being who they want to be. They're being what the world tells them they should be. Or they think they got it. They're going to trip on it at some point. Like it's just out there. I've just got to find it. Exactly. Develop it. Well, you will, you will go out there and find it. But what you're going to find is you're going to find that you should live a certain way,

go to school a certain way, have so many kids, do this, do that. And then you're going to wake up at 45 years old and be fucking miserable. That's what you're going to be if you let the world tell you who you should be. And that's not being authentic. Being authentic is deciding who you're going to be and then being it. True. Yeah, 100%. Yeah. 100%.

Go ahead. No, I was just going to change to a different topic. I'm going to duck out because I got to pee. Okay, you do that. So the question I have, Ryan, is, so you talked about sovereignty, taking control of your life. So let's put you in a scenario that you've met somebody who has just had their rock bottom. Their life is completely out of control. They said, give me the cliff notes, give me the five-point plan for taking back control of my life.

What do you tell them? Well, so the first thing I talk about in sovereignty is the battle that we're fighting. And if you're familiar with like the hero's journey, for example, like, like think about any movie or playwright, whatever it may be, there's, there's this potential hero and that's what he is. He's a potential hero and he's got some external battle that he needs to fight. And he usually finds some mentor and he goes on this, this journey or this voyage to, to overcome that external battle. And all the while there's something internal happening. And at the end he resolves the external conflict and the internal conflict. Right. So what I'm talking about when I talk about the battle is yes, there are some

things that are stacked up against men. I'm not denying that, but more important than that is the internal battle that we face. And everybody faces this in a different way. But at the end of the day, we become our own worst enemy. We self-sabotage. We're undisciplined. We're weak. We're lazy. We're immediate gratification. So I think the first step to your point that somebody needs to figure out is what is the battle that you're fighting? Are you lazy? Okay, good. Now we know, but you've got to be real with yourself. Yes, I'm lazy. Or yes, I want something for nothing. Or yes, I've messed up with my relationship, which is what I did. Yes, I'm 50 pounds overweight, so I need to fix that. And I

credit Andy for doing what he's done over the past year. He figured out what was wrong in his life, took ownership of it, and then did something about it. So you've got to figure out what that internal battle is first, because you've got to figure out which journey you're going to go on. That's good. I love that. In addition to laziness, I think a lot of people struggle with, they don't even know how bitter they've gotten in their life. They're angry at something, and they just need to let it go, or they need to reconcile it, or just figure out how to redeem it. And I think that takes time too, though. Like if you think about the average person's day, I mean, think about you, you wake up with just enough time to shower, maybe grab a quick bite

on the way out, kiss your wife goodbye, pat the kids on the head. You go into a job that you're miserable at. You got stacks of paperwork up to the ceiling. You don't take any lunch breaks. You come home, have dinner, maybe watch your, whatever series show you're watching. You go to bed, you do it all over again. Like where in your day is there any time for reflection upon what you want? No time at all. Let me, let me say something. So most people find themselves in that situation at some point, right? Sure. Like you just described the reason most people never get out of that situation is because they look at it and see how much work there is to be done. And so they just keep doing

the same thing. Right. You know, what's your, what's your advice to someone? Cause I know you deal with guys who say this, they're like, fuck dude. I, I did what I was told and I did what I was told the best I could. And it's got me to this place where I'm miserable. Yeah. I have a job I hate. I'm in a relationship that is almost impossible for me to tolerate. I'm, I'm unhappy, dude. You know, like I don't make enough money. Like nothing about my life is the way that I wanted it to be. And I, I legitimately did everything people told me I was supposed to do. What do you tell people when they're in that situation? Well, the first point is, who did you listen to?

And what results are they producing in their lives? When I started in my financial planning practice, I had a guy teach me about how to run a financial services industry. What I came to realize is he had an unsuccessful financial planning practice. And what that yielded was an unsuccessful financial planning practice in me. So I think what we've got to do is qualify our resources. Absolutely. Like you can't just, so that's a good step to start, right? Sure. Absolutely. Some people understand that from the get go. Yeah. That's why I sucked at school. Cause like I fucking look, I'd be sitting in

school. This is some dude teach me about finance or entrepreneurship. And then I see him drive away in a fucking shit box car. And I'm like, now how the fuck does this guy now? And people will say, well, maybe he decides to drive a shit. No, that's not the case. It's not because if he had a choice, he would choose something different. Right. And like, so, so, so I could never listen to people that were never credible. Like I just couldn't, like, I've never been able to, that's why I sucked in school. Cause I'm like, why the fuck are you teaching me this shit when you haven't even done it? But what I'm saying is that doesn't come naturally for people.

So like a lot of people, a lot of people just do what they're supposed to do. Cause that's what they were told they were supposed to do. Follow fucking directions. So, you know, if you have somebody who's come to you and they're fucking facing a mountain of adversity and everything in their life they fucking hate, how do we get them to fucking wake the fuck up and be willing to chip away at all these things that they've created? Like, it's overwhelming, right? It's like somebody who's 400 fucking pounds and they should weigh 150 pounds right or 700 pounds or 300 pounds and they should weigh 140 or 160 right they're like

fuck dude there's so much work to do like I'm never gonna get so here's one thing that I've done in my life and it's actually in the book it's called the battle plan and essentially what the battle plan is it's a 90-day planning tool strategy for the way that you're going to live your life and what you're going to accomplish in 90 days, not a year, not 30 days, not longer. Let's just focus on three months. That's the chapter, right? And then we can build the next chapter later, next quarter. So what we do is we focus on four key areas in each, in a 90 day period. And you come up with one, just one objective that you want to accomplish in each of those four areas. So if it's condition, which is synonymous with health, for example, and you say to yourself, well, I want to go run in 90 days, I want to run a Spartan race,

for example. Cool. That's our 90-day objective. That's what we're working towards. Now we got to work backwards into this thing. So we work into what we call tactics. So what are the three tactics that you can do every single day that will yield that result for you? So it might be, I'm going to spend 45 to 60 minutes in the gym every single day. I'm going to eliminate processed sugars from my diet and I'm going to drink X amount of water. And that's going to be the three tactics. You are literally now checking those off every single day and you're just going through the motions. It will inevitably produce the result that you're after. And that's what we do. We do that for

condition, which is health. We do it for calibration, which is yourself taking care of yourself. We do it for contribution, which is the way you add value and provide in the world as a father or a business owner or whatever it may be. And then the last is connection. So the relationships you have with a spouse or friends, colleagues, coworkers, whatever it may be. So we focus very narrowly, four key objectives, three tactics to accomplish in the next 90 days. And that momentum and that movement. It's amazing what people in the next 90 days. And that momentum and that movement. It's amazing what people can accomplish in 90 days. It's crazy. You know, like, I guess what I'm trying to, the reason I'm bringing this up is like, dude, I know there's

a lot of people out there that like, listen to this shit. They listen to me and they listen to you and whoever else. And they're like, yeah, but, and then they list out all the shit that they got unintentionally because they weren't living with a plan and they weren't living by deciding who they are. If that's you and you're listening to this, you have to do it in a phase-by-phase way. You know what I'm saying? You're not going to snap your fingers and fucking shit.

Everything's going to be great. But dude, you will be surprised that in 90 days or 180 days that your life can be completely fucking different. Yeah. Completely different. Well, you talked about Charlie. People just can't see the light.

I mean, you talked about Charlie. He's talking about an Ironman. Right. It's like, well, if you've been sitting on the couch for five years, you're not going to go run an Ironman in 90 days. Right. You could go run a three mile or a 5K. Right.

Or 10 miles. Right. Or you could go fucking run 100 yards today. Exactly. You could go run a three mile or a 5k or 10 miles. Or you could go fucking run a hundred yards today. Exactly. You could go run fucking 200 yards. You know what you could do? You can walk, run a mile, walk what you got to walk, run what you got to run. And time it so that you can improve next time you do it.

Dude, it's just, you know, people have this nature of taking things and giving it as doomsday scenario. Like, dude, there's very few things that you could fucking not recover from. Right. You know what I'm saying? Like very few is going to kill you or probably injure you or something. Like, dude, there's, there's things that, you know, most things, most of your decisions can be undone. You know what I mean? And replaced with healthy decisions and good decisions for you. But I think, and you tell me if you agree or disagree, but I think it all starts with figuring out who the fuck you are and deciding who you're going to be. You know what I mean? Like, let's take that out of the fucking way.

Who do you want to be? Not who do you think you are? Not who does your mom want you to be? Not who your dad want you to be? Not who do you think you are? Not who does your mom want you to be? Not who your dad want you to be? Not who you're expected to be from your spouse? Who do you want to be? Yeah. Because if you're not that and you don't decide to become that, no matter what the fuck paint or how much icing you put on the cake or, or whatever you do on the outside, isn't going to be the real shit. One of the questions I ask myself is, who do I need to become?

Right? So like, if I think to myself, and I know guys have said this, like, oh, you're going to meet with Andy? Like, I want to be able to do that. Well, in order to meet with guys like Andy, you have to become somebody different than you are right now.

So what does that actual individual look like? Or I want to be a triathlete or whatever. Good. Who do you need to become in order to be that? I want to be a successful business owner. Who do you need to become to be that successful business owner? Right? Those are the ways that you start working into who you need to become and what you need to do to be that person. That's right. And dude, if you want to attract people of quality, guess what you got to do first? You got to, you got to be, be quality. You got to bring the value. And that's, that goes for your fucking relationships. Like I see all these dudes out there who like this is

the funniest fucking thing to me like guys and a lot of people are going to take this the wrong fucking way but i don't really care because it's fucking truth guys will fucking be like well you know i was with like you know that saying like all that matters is what's in your heart like your mom fucking tells you right that's the biggest crock of shit right that you will ever fucking be told because i'm gonna tell you everything else matters your fucking looks matter how much money you make fucking matters yes what your career is matters what your ambition is matters what your confidence is matters all that shit that your mom told you that didn't fucking matter in relationships actually matters a fucking lot

and so when you see like like these extremely uh beautiful successful driven women that you want to attract and guess what you're living in mom's basement you're never fucking getting them bro and i see these dudes who don't have much shit going on for them. Like talking about these other girls, like, Oh, they're fucking gold diggers and this and that. Hey,

motherfucker. Quality wants to be with quality. You know what I'm saying? And dude, a lot of the fucking, a lot of the quality that a lot of women bring to the table, guess what it is? It's fucking looks.

Okay. And a lot of girls have more than that. But one of the qualities that has been desired by men for literally the entire time that man has existed has been beauty. Well, let's talk about the flip side of that too, because, and this is something I get pushed back on. One of the qualities women look for men is power. Is the ability to provide. Exactly. That's a real thing. So it doesn't matter how fucking, you don't have to go around pretending you're an alpha male, but if you're not earning a fucking good living, you're not getting the fucking highest quality

chicks. And a lot of girls are listening right now. Well, the highest quality aren't just the ones that look good. I agree. But you're still not dating a fucking loser. Like if you're a girl right now and you're listening and you're, let's say you're a fucking five on the one to 10 scale, it looks wise, but you're a 25 on the fucking earning scale and having your shit together and sense of humor. You still aren't dating some motherfucker without his shit, right? No, it's just the way it goes. So if you want to attract a good product, guess what? You got to become a good fucking product. All right. Now, when you're in high school and you're in college, that shit doesn't matter as much, but when you grow up in the real world, guess what? It fucking matters. You know what I'm saying? Like, dude, people, people say shit like, Oh, you know, that guy,

that guy, the only reason that the girls like that guy is because he's got money. And you know what? I bet he doesn't fucking care. Right. Because he worked his fucking dick off for that fucking money. You know what I'm saying? Well, there's a lot of ways that we can add value in being financially able to provide for the family. Right, but that doesn't mean you could be financially able and be an asshole in every other area. Of course.

But what I'm saying is, dude, people just have a hard time seeing the way that things really are. Right. You know what I mean? And well, they think it's shallow and it's not, it's actually shallow. It's built into our genes. Exactly. Women want a fucking dude that can protect them, that could take care of the fucking family and that they feel safe around. Okay. And all that other shit goes by the wayside, like your fucking looks, your fucking sense of humor and all that shit. That's like the icing, right? The fundamental thing is that you could take care of a family that you could protect them and provide safety yep on a primal fucking level that's what they're attracted to you know why they're attracted to people who are quote-unquote alpha males because they possess

those qualities right that's it yep okay so guys who fucking think like otherwise like they think oh well i'm a really nice guy. This is like, why are you getting a friend zone? Cause no, I'm a really fucking nice guy. Well, cool. Women don't care. They're not fucking sexually turned on by a fucking quote unquote nice guy. Cause a nice guy doesn't add value to the relationship or challenge them or do any of the things like, dude, most women run the fucking shit. They run the world. Like, dude, guys do whatever the fuck they say. Like, you know, you know what a good dating strategy is? Don't do what fucking chicks say. Well, they're intrigued by it. Exactly. They don't. Why the fuck does this guy not beg me for my vagina and every fucking thing that he does? This is funny

because my wife, so my wife and I worked at, we both worked at the mall and this was like 16, 17 years ago. And we, we would flirt, you know, on breaks or whatever. And, and I asked for her number, her phone number. She gave me her number. And then I went to Hawaii with my buddies for two weeks and she was pissed. Yeah. She's, and the re she even says now, the reason I was so attracted is because you were the only guy who didn't call me back. Bro, look, I fucking tell dudes this all the time. They always try to fucking argue with me. And girls argue with me too. They say, oh no, this is wrong.

Bullshit. This is the fucking way it is. Yeah. You get a number from a chick. You don't fucking call her the next day. You don't text her. You don't fucking call her the next day after that. You don't call her for 10 fucking days.

You don't call or text. Okay. Because what's going to happen in that girl's mind is this. Oh, well, he's just like every other dude he's you know because every other dude with a hot chick is like fucking texting her blowing her up hey you want to netflix and chill this and that take her shit put it away for 10 days put it in a fucking safe after 10 days go get the shit out because she's gone through this fucking mental phase of like oh it's probably just like every other dude i'm gonna ignore him this and that then when like, oh, it's probably just like every other dude. I'm going to ignore him, this and that. Then when you don't call, she's like, well, that's weird.

Like, this motherfucker don't get a call. Then she's going to get mad like at like day five or six. She'd be like, who the fuck does this guy think he is? Blah, blah, blah. Fuck him. Then she's going to forget about it. Then all of a sudden you're ringing up. Ring, ring, ring.

And guess what? She's like, well, fuck you. Blah, blah, blah. You don't wait. Fucking you're like, hey, I got stuff going on. I'm sorry. You know, blah, blah, blah. And guess what? She's like, well, fuck you. Blah, blah, blah. You don't wait. Fucking you're like, Hey, I got stuff going on. I'm sorry. You know, blah, blah, blah. And guess what? Now, now she's happy. She, cause it's like a relief. Like, Oh, you didn't actually blow her off. Right? So dude, by, by having a little bit of fucking patience and just being the opposite of every other motherfucker, you can have really good success dating, but dude, guys don't have it. Well,

you know what? A lot of guys too, a lot of guys don't realize that when you're in a dating situation, this is a game of chess that what her feelings are, what matters, not yours. They're so quick to be like, oh my God, you're so beautiful. You're so hot. Oh, you're so this, you're so that. And they come on so fucking strong, like every other fucking dude that there's nothing to differentiate you from all the other fucking guys out there. So you're just another, you're so that, and they come on so fucking strong, like every other fucking dude that there's nothing to differentiate you from all the other fucking guys out there. Right? So you're just another dude who's been trying to bang her since she grew

titties. When she was 12 years old, you just filed yourself away in the fucking filing cabinet of dudes that wanted to fuck and you stay there. And guess where you get nowhere, nowhere. So how about this? How about be,

take what other guys do or take all the things that you've you've thought were right your whole entire life and do the fucking opposite of it yeah that's just seriously what everybody else tells you to do right you're like all right and they're like well why why why do girls like these guys who are assholes well i'll tell you why because they're complete opposite of you they're different and there's a million of you right and it's a natural challenge when guys legitimately don't care it's a natural challenge when guys legitimately don't care. It's a natural challenge for the girl. Okay. So that's why you see hot girls getting an unhealthy relationship over and over and over again, because hot girls have dudes lined up that are being fucking the

same as every other dude. Right. And so they take the guys who are total jerks and they see them as like, Oh, this guy's different. It doesn't matter that he's a jerk. He puts off the, the, the aura of challenge to these women that they're not used to. And it's exciting to them. All right. So if you want to be a fucking good guy and actually still get girls, you don't have to be a dick. You don't have to be a dick. All you've got to be is a fucking you and be a challenge to them. Well, they want to be fucking challenged. Well, and I don't, and I don't think even, even with that too, is, a lot of guys, and I did this, so I'm speaking from experience, made my wife the center of my universe. Yeah.

And it messed with us. That's unattractive, dude. Totally. Yeah. It's off-putting. It's unattractive. And frankly speaking, it's weak. That's unattractive for girls too.

It's weak. Like when girls do it. Yeah. Right. And it might feel good to be that way for a minute. In the beginning but it burns out quick man yeah and what guys will do is they'll forsake their friends forsake all their activities and all their because i did this when i got married do we all have done this

everybody i figured this out because i fucked it up the most yep you know what i'm saying so you've got to make and i know this sounds selfish but this ties into the book as well like you have to be the center of your universe like you have to take care of yourself. She's part of that experience. Right. And so is other things that you have going on. Right. And when she's strong independently and you're strong independently, you're significantly stronger. That's right. You have your own shit going on. And when you have the time to spend together, it's great. When you don't, we understand because we got our own shit going on. Right. Relations relationships fucking fail because one or the other person or and a lot of times both have nothing else right and that's why they stay in a healthy situations argue fight call the cops

on each other this that and the other and then they try to blame it on romance oh we're just so romantic no you're both fucking losers yeah that's what it is yeah you know what i mean life right and like dude you know i'm just i'm just trying to throw a bone to these dudes out there that think that like like their mom was telling the truth oh be a really nice guy you know you know what dude that'll get you that it's okay to be nice right you want to be nice but have a sense of self and be someone who stands up for their beliefs don't agree with everything a girl says because you want to fuck her. You know what I'm saying? Be a fucking challenge. Be who you are. And if you just be who you are unapologetically, you'll have success. You know, I, dude, I was told growing up, you know, all that matters is your inside. No one fucking does it because you know what? When I was fat, I didn't get laid. When I was fucking in shape, guess what? I got fucking laid. You know what I mean? Well, it matters. It does matter. And people want to be with attractive people. Like don't, why, why is that controversial? Yes. But people have a

hard time fucking. They, when I say that they think that I'm being a dick or I'm, I'm fucking judgmental or I'm fucking shallow. Like you said, no dude, you know what I i am i'm a fucking realist right you know what i mean and like dude my mom told me all the wrong shit just like she probably told you guys all the wrong shit when it comes to dating yeah you know what it was wrong and that's that so i struggle with fucking girls and i struggle i struggle with that shit i had to learn it the hard way you know so i'm just trying to save some motherfuckers some time like I had to learn it the hard way, you know? So I'm just trying to save some motherfuckers some time. Like I had to break it down to a fucking science, bro. I was fat. Like I wasn't getting fucking, I didn't have natural game. I was shy. I was fat. I had to fucking like dissect this shit and be like, like it was a chess match, you know? Like,

all right, dude, step one is this. Step two is this. If you do this, I'll do this. I was exactly, dude, no bullshit. I was terrified. you know? Dude, I figured out this fucking thing. Dude, this is the best thing ever. So I figured out this thing. Like, I used to be, like most guys, I was afraid to get fucking shut down by a chick. Like, I wouldn't go talk to girls. I figured out two things, okay?

Number one, the hottest girls get talked to the least, okay? Because everybody else is scared shitless. So if you could conjure up the fucking courage to go up to the least. Okay. Cause everybody else is scared shitless. Right. So if you could conjure up the fucking courage to go up to the best looking girls, dude, they're way easier to fucking attract than the ones that are like sevens because the ones that are like sevens get hit on all the fucking time. Cause everybody thinks they can get them. So I figured that out and dude, I've all, you know, I've always dated pretty girls because of that. Cause I figured out I'm not fucking exceptionally good looking dude, you know, like,

but the other thing that I figured out is this is like, dude, if you want to go up and talk to a girl and you're afraid she's going to shut you down, just have a plan. If she shuts you down. And my plan, it was always this one of two things.

They, I will walk up, you know, you're laughing cause you know what it is, dude, it fucking works though. So dude, like you go up,

Hey, how you doing? Blah, blah, blah. And she fucking snubs you. It was like, Oh,

Hey, look, you have like the biggest booger hanging out of your nose and i just wanted to tell you about it like i wasn't like trying to hit on you or anything and they'll be like oh my god oh my god so thank you thank you for telling me that guess what it opens up the door to talk absolutely humor yeah because they're embarrassed think about it when someone tells you like or you say oh yeah you break down that barrier, right? You've got a big piece of something in your teeth. I could see it from across the room. I noticed none of your friends are telling you.

I just wanted to tell you. And then they're like, oh, they cover their mouth. They're like, oh my God. Yeah. Oh,

and it breaks down that fucking bitch barrier, you know? And if you got a plan, bro, you're in good shape because guess what? At the very least, you could just walk away and feel good about it and you don't feel embarrassed. Right.

So put those two fucking tools in your pocket. There you go. Next time you go talk to a chick and she's a bitch, just tell her she's got a big old booger hanging off of her nose and you can walk away free and clear. You don't feel like a dick. Dude, I swear I use that a thousand fucking times. The flip side of that is if you do go up there and you are a good dude and she's a bitch, why would you want to talk to her? Of course yeah of course of course but the thing is is like you have to understand von some girls get hit on by so many fucking dudes that it's just like get the fuck away from me yeah you know what i'm saying because they just throw you in the pile so you've got to figure out how to like yeah it's not be in the fucking pile right be different you know yeah yeah yeah anyway dude i want to do like a fucking dating book so bad or a dating fucking podcast

so bad. Let's do a series. Let's do a series. But I don't want you on it because you're terrible. No, no, no. You think. I'm like the big, I'm the master. Just wait.

He's going to pull some stuff out here. You just talked to my old friends. Talk to my old friends. They'll let you know. Talk to my old friends. Silent game. I used to have so many so many girls that were friends like i had the most girlfriends that's one i had the most

dude i'm telling you man like i had to learn the hard way and i made a science out of it i'm not saying i'm the biggest fucking pimp in the world but i tell you this for someone that had natural no natural ability at all i am the most skilled motherfucker on the face of the earth in that aspect. Zero natural ability. Zero. Seriously. Like, dude. Well, you don't have to convince us.

I want to start a dating mastermind. Like, make dudes fucking pay to get into it. Like, all right, and I'll fucking coach you. Like, you got a mastermind, don't you? Yeah. All right. Dating mastermind will work, right? Absolutely.

100%. Yeah. It would blow up. Yeah. Like, I think we could charge whatever for it, too. I'm sure you could. Because there's dudes that make fucking millions of dollars that have no fucking clue.

Dude, it's astounding to me how many people have these issues. I mean, most of it's due to inexperience, but it's just crazy to me. Dude, I'll charge one of those fucking, I'll have two levels. I'll have the high dollar, it'll be depending on how much money you make.

That way everybody can fucking be in. You know what I'm saying? Like if you make a percentage, yeah. If you make like a million dollars, I'm teaching you how to fucking conquer one of the biggest areas of your life that you suck at. Oh yeah. It's worth some money. Well, and it, and it translates to like, it's a confidence issue, right? I mean, it really is. So if you become confident with women, for example, you're probably going to be more confident in a board meeting or with a client or a business proposal or whatever it may be. No question. Yeah. I think more dudes are scared of women than anything else. Yeah. I would agree with that. I would agree with that. I don't think they'll admit it though. No, I mean, like I know guys that are

that are like that women naturally like that still are like a ball of nerves around them. You know what I mean? Yeah. Like, dude, they're just fucking people. Yeah, it's really interesting. But, you know, people get like that too, even with like celebrities, you know, you get around and all of a sudden you get retarded. I don't fucking, celebrities don't, like I've met a number of like big celebrities

and like they don't, like I just look at them like, man, you look shorter than you do in fucking TV. You know what I'm saying? I'm not like thinking, oh my God, there's fucking whoever. That's because you know that's how they want to be talked to. They're normal fucking people and that's how they want to be approached.

But girls are the same way. It gets me. These dudes are like, what's this fucking line that I should... Motherfucker, how about this? I'm Andy. What's your name? You know what I'm saying? It's just so simple in my work. Yeah, like dude, it's so simple

and it's like, it just takes a little bit of nuts. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. And a little bit of backup plan in case they fucking blow you off. The booger backup plan. Yeah, throw the booger on them

and fucking walk away. Dude, I'm telling you, that fucking shit saved me because it got me over my fear of like approaching women. Did it open, so did those women, that fucking shit saved me. Oh, I'm sure, man. It got me over my fear of approaching women. Did it open? So did those women? It probably opened the door, though.

I'm not going to say, oh, yeah, fucking. But I can say this. I made a lot of new friends that way. Yeah, I'm sure. I'll just say it that way. I'm sure. And the more friends that you have of the opposite sex, the more intriguing you are to the opposite sex.

Yeah. Because they're like, what's this guy? What's this guy that all the hot girls are friends with him for? Yeah.. Because they're like, what's this guy? They're like, all the hot girls are friends with him for. Yeah. And then they're like, well, he doesn't look gay. So maybe I should go find out. Like in Tyler's case, they're like, fuck. Well, he's gay.

So that's why he's here. I got a lot of hot friends, though, that are girls. Yeah. That's because you don't have any game because they shouldn't be your friend. They should be your girlfriend. What? Nothing. Yeah.

You're going to teach me some stuff though, right? I know you're humble enough to learn. No, I'm not. I fucking know it all when it comes to that. No, I figured Tyler out. He's a perfectionist. No. What?

That's his beard. No, you got all these really good looking women around you and you're like, eh, she's not this or she's not that. That's because Tyler's perfect and he expects perfection, right? Well, maybe. You know, I think people's imperfections make them more pretty than fucking their perfections. Yeah. Like I've been in the fitness industry where it's like everybody is like a perfect fucking

this. It's the same. And like, dude, that shit don't do nothing for me. Like I think people are attractive when they have unique things about them. When they're real. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. For sure. Well, anyway, where can people find your book, dude? Uh, order a man.com slash book. Make it easy. All right. It's all right there. Take you to all the links and everything else. So it's been cool. It's been really cool. Yeah. I'm, I'm, I'm excited about the book. I think, uh, you know, people are really going to get a lot out of it. Um, like I said, if you've read extreme ownership, you like that book.

Oh yeah. This book is definitely something that you should read. It's definitely not like a another version, but it's along those lines. Yeah. Similar concepts. I love that book. Extreme ownership. I think it's fucking amazing. It's a good book. I mean, he put together a really, that, that, that whole notion and idea will literally transform your life. Yeah. Like that's the foundational principle of success. He's a fucking stud, man. He is.

Yeah. I can't wait to have him on the show. We don't have a plan to have him on the show, but we're, it's going to happen eventually. Yeah. Yeah. He, you need, yeah, you need to get him in here. Um, he's got his musters and things that he does too, which, which I'm going to go to. Yeah.

Dude, I've heard, I've heard some people have gone to him and they fucking love it. Yeah. He, they do a good job so he's a perfect example of what i was saying earlier like a quiet confident dude that you can tell is in control of his shit right right right he's got everything under control like he's not you know pushing his stuff on anybody he's like this is what i do right and this is what i believe and this is who i am and his his you sense it so strong that you just naturally are like, damn dude. All right. I want to be more like that. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah. I mean, dude, you could feel it through the fucking internet. Oh yeah. You know? Yeah.

There's just that presence there for sure. He's also seems like a guy you wouldn't want to fuck with. Yeah. He, the last podcast he was on, he invited me to come down and do some jujitsu with him, which I'm going to take him up on. And I fully plan on getting my ass kicked. Yeah. I bet. It'll be awesome at the same time. Have you had him on your show? Twice. Really? Yeah. I'll, I'll, I'll see if I can connect with him. That'd be awesome. I'll shoot him. I've got his, his Skype or you do in person Skype, both of them with Skype. Okay. But I'm sure, I mean, he travels. So, but, uh, yeah, I'll, I'll reach out. Another guy I'm going to get on soon too is ET. Oh yeah. You had ET on your show? No, have i fucking love i haven't been able to connect with him yet yeah yeah i can make that

happen yeah he would be awesome he's uh really good i like him and i like inky johnson i know i know you i i didn't hadn't heard him before you mentioned that no i i found out through you and yeah guys are stud dude anybody who asks like who's your favorite speaker i was like dude yeah nobody could touch inky dude the guy's a stud i started following him after you mentioned that et's like there's very few guys that i would be like damn dude i don't want to speak right after them oh like i don't want to speak after either one of those guys they're so good like i could i fucking speak after everybody but not them too yeah you know what i'm saying they're fucking gifted yeah they are you know are you so when is um what is it, 10 X on it. That's coming

up, isn't it? Yeah. Like, uh, next weekend, like, Oh, well, if you're listening to this podcast, uh, it's probably already happened. Yeah. But, but yeah, I'm excited about that. That'd be good. So speaking of, uh, of links, I actually changed our link to make it easier for those who want to sign up for a breaking news about the upcoming Academy and the Frisella files and all that good stuff. So if you guys want to sign up, if you're not already signed up, um, it's, uh, the MFCEO.com forward slash sign up. You know what, dude, what that was the, that was the roughest like interruption ever. And people are going to think that Tyler actually edited that in. It was so fucking hard. I know, but I didn't want to forget it. Cause it's very it's very important like that was like you just like you're starving and there's only like one piece of chicken left in the buffet i'm having that yeah well i didn't want to close without

without saying that but do you want to tell everybody i know you probably don't but you want to tell everybody a little bit about the first cellophiles because we haven't gone cool man you know um um, I like, I like trying to do extra stuff for people that are like truly engaged in what we're doing. Uh, so what every once, once a week we do a newsletter and it's just a exclusive to our email subscribers only. Um, and it's practical. It's a practical tip of the week basically of what we're, it's kind of like a mission, like what we're going to work on this week and how we're going to improve this week.

And it comes out on Mondays. Uh, it gets people, you know, something to focus on for the week. And, uh, and yeah, it's cool. I really like doing it, man. Cause it's like short, it's sweet. It's short little videos. It's like five, five to 10 minutes max. And it's, it's one skill that I'm, I'm that, you know, we're practically like, Hey guys, look, we're all on the same team. This is what we're going to work on this week. And we work on it. And, uh, and dude, it's fun, man. Cause like, dude, people love it because, uh, I think people love it because it makes people feel like, Hey, we're all working on the same thing together. You know what I mean? Like it's fun fun but the key thing is that you can't get it yeah you gotta yeah plug that email yeah plug it the mfco.com forward slash sign up s-i-g-n-u-p-o

vaughn see i could teach you a couple things yeah you're trying to beat around the bush you just gotta grab that motherfucker by the hair fucking never mind i'm just saying you gotta be direct that's right you know be assertive so plug that again bmfco.com forward slash sign up there you go yes

and you get to see the warehouse yeah because your video's in the warehouse which I thought was cool it's cool because I do videos

I don't see that stuff it's not like one place it's actually literally whatever we're doing that day it's kind of like a little break and we're like alright let's talk about this for 10 minutes

so dude honestly I think right now that's my favorite thing that we're doing that day it's kind of like a little break and we're like all right let's talk about this for 10 minutes so um i dude honestly i think right now that's my favorite thing that we're doing yeah um i think that was my idea the youtube show yeah it was actually your idea no that was a fuck no that was monday mission no it was not actually it was a podcast idea so we're gonna do a third podcast the monday mission but dude i don't think we should that's basically the same thing though. Right. But we're keeping it exclusive. Hey, do you have credit greed? I think he's suffering from credit greed. I think he is too. Your credit greed

score is fucking low, bro. Wait, if your credit greed score was low, that would mean good or wait. Yeah, that's a good question. Yeah. So we have to decide. Something to ponder. If you have a high credit greed score, it means that's bad. Yeah. Right? You should have a low credit greed score. Did you that's bad yeah right you should have a low credit yeah did you ever do that no you didn't do that right no this is something we talk about like on partnerships like the reason most partnerships

fail is because of credit greed everybody wants to be the guy that gets the car oh yeah instead of just winning for sure in reality yeah just who fucking cares about the credit that's right we're here to win. Right. Yeah, that's interesting. Yeah. So it's a little something that we came up with. Definitely.

Where did that come from? Oh, when I was talking to live Skype with that guy. Right. Yeah. Credit greed. I said it in Vaughn's face.

I was like, oh my God. He made t-shirts. He literally got a fucking photo. Do you know how many times he says something and I'm like, oh,

I better write that. I'm sure. I'm sure all the time. That's your job. I know. Yeah. I know. Thankfully.

Your job is to remind me of shit that I say. Yeah, pretty much. And then, and then pretend it's your idea. Yeah. Hey,

it's kept me employed for the last two or three years. That's right. It's job security. Right. So, I had this idea. It's called credit greed.

And I'm like, that sounds really good. It's like the opposite of my job. My job is to feed him ideas and then let him take responsibility. First of all, you gotta have all kinds, man. You gotta have all kinds.

The ideas that you do, I get yelled at for. Like the fucking idea of the fries or the news. The French fries. That was his fucking idea. That was Tyler. I put it up there

and he fucking yelled at it. Was that your idea? What was that other one that got fucking yelled at? It was that kid that you put in the video that got bullied and come to find out

his mom's like a racist or some shit. Oh, really? And I got fucking blasted for it. I didn't even fucking know. You know what's funny? I saw you post that and I was like,

oh, no. Dude, I didn't know what was going on. I know you didn't. Yeah. I didn't know until like 15, like maybe an hour before. Well, fuck,

I knew right away when I posted it, dude. People were pissed. And rightfully so after digging into it. Yeah. I mean, maybe. Who knows?

Yeah. Who knows the truth? Exactly. You know? Oh, man, that stuff gets so skewed and manipulated. Like, you never know what's going on. Dude, it's because everybody has an agenda. Yes.

Very few people are just about the truth. Right. You know what I mean? Right. It's like, I'm going to say this so I can get this result, so I can get this like or get this share, get this many views. Instead of like, there's very few people on the,

on the internet that are truly selfless and authentic. Yeah. You know what I mean? I agree. And like, dude, not everybody like dude. And don't get me wrong.

Like I said this on last week's podcast too. Like look, everybody has their fucking selfish interests, right? But the key is a minimizing the selfish interests, like to a point where it's not affecting the design of your product well and if you can align what you're trying to do like i even think like people get after me like bro when you have a fucking mastermind or you

have a group right and people pay in it right right that's cool right and do you like getting paid yeah i love it fucking right i do too but that shouldn't affect the quality of the product or the reason that you make a product or your intentions when it comes to creating the product should always stay pure. Right. And if you can master that skill of separating your own personal interests and benefit and then creating content or products or solutions for people without that interest in mind, that's the key to making a lot of money. And that there's alignment in that too. Like, so people get after me like,

oh, way to make money off guys that are struggling. I'm like, they're not different concepts. I can make money and help men that are struggling. That's right. And I can find alignment in that, which gives me fulfillment and puts money in the bank account. My wife makes money off of people being sick.

Right, exactly. Because she's a doctor. That's what I'm saying. What? No, dude. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. No, you're right. That's crazy.

Or teachers, right? No, dude, I've gotten a few messages of people that are like, you're fucking sellout because you're fucking starting this academy and people are going to have to fucking pay for blah, blah, blah. Yeah, motherfucker, you're right. Because you know what? I've invested 20 fucking years of my life. Right. and I'm pretty sure I give out as much free content as anybody and that's not going to change. So if I have more that I want to fucking say,

and I think it's worth money, guess what? I'm going to fucking charge money. And you know what else? If you don't pay for something, you don't fucking value it. So there's not, there's, there's less chance of adherence because you don't fucking value what the fuck you just paid for or didn't pay for. So if I were to make my academy and say, oh, dude, I'm going to make it all for free, the chances of success actually go down because people don't have any skin in the game, right?

They don't have any self-accountability to following through. But you also do a disservice. If you don't charge for it, you do a disservice to everybody else who wants to charge for it, you do a disservice to everybody else who wants to up the level. Oh dude, look. Because they're surrounded by people who don't or won't invest. My shit, it ain't going to be cheap. I can tell you that right now. It's going to be fucking expensive. And you know why it's going to be expensive? Because I know it fucking

works. Right. And if you go fucking do it, you're going to fucking do well. That's it. I don't have a problem. I don't have a problem justifying my fucking, my knowledge worth. I've spent 20 fucking years. And I think if you look around my life, I'm pretty fucking credible with it. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? So I don't,

you know, if you want to fucking learn the shit, you fucking pay. If you don't, you can listen to the podcast. You don't have to do it. Yeah. Listen to the podcast.

Or you could take the alternative route and spend 15 years learning. What do you learn? Whatever, man. Yeah. Good point. But I think it's just, it's interesting how people, they're so accustomed to getting free that they expect free.

You know what I'm saying? Or they think because the purpose is noble. What would you pay, dude, if I could fucking say to you, you're an entrepreneur and you're going to have to fucking go out for 10 years and you're going to have to fucking struggle and grind and do all this shit. But by going through an academy like mine, I could save you seven of those 10 years or five of those 10 years. What's that worth?

Yeah, I mean, potentially millions of dollars. It's worth a hell of a lot more than what it's worth to go to fucking a traditional college. Oh, yeah. And my shit's going to be a lot cheaper than that. So let's face it, the people who want it to be free are the people that are not going to do shit. They're not going to act on it anyway. Even if they paid for it. Right. Even if they paid some low amount for it, they still wouldn't do it. Yeah. So yeah. Hi dude. Look, man. All my point is, is like, you know, when you have something of value, there's nothing wrong with fucking getting a

fair price for it. Right. That's it. So people that don't understand that there's, there really is all the same shit out there somewhere. You just got to go find it. Right. You know what I mean? And yeah, find it, package it in a way that's actually going to work. That you understand it. Right.

Try it. So like all the shit you teach in your groups, it's all out there for free. Right. There's nothing new that I teach. But it's going to take you 10 years to go figure it out. Exactly. So it is what it is. Yep.

Final question, Ryan. Let's do it. Would you like to see a monthly video program of Andy, myself and Andy's brother doing shots and talking? Yeah. Well, yeah, I would like to see that. I think there should be a monthly video.

I think there should be a monthly video on YouTube and it should be like happy hour with us. And yes, like we would have like you come on or have fucking like, we can't have Ryan come on. I mean, I don't drink, but I would watch you guys drink.

It would still be fun. But my point is, is like, dude, we, if we brought them in, right. And like had a,

a two hour show or an hour show of just, and then we, what we could do, we could do for like two hours and then you could edit out like you could edit the fucking good parts because there would be a time while we're getting our buzz that's probably not going to be as cool that would be actually dude i'm telling you because it would open up a whole new conversation who do you think is would be the best of any of our guests like with too much alcohol in them who would be the most entertaining bradley

yeah oh yeah yeah bradley although i don't fucking like that anything yeah i was gonna say he could be the opposite yeah no uh dude i'd like to do that with gary oh yeah that'll never happen i know it'll never happen because he's too protective of that but dude i would love to have it with gary like because i think funny i think people would like that they'd be like oh this guy's a normal dude right it's relatable right he is relatable dude gary's a fucking awesome dude like he's he's a good dude. Right. It's relatable. Right. He is relatable. Dude. Gary's a fucking awesome dude. Like he's, he's a good guy. It's just like, I just wish he would show a little bit more of his himself. If that makes sense. You know what I mean? Um, he's a fucking funny dude. He's got a sense of humor. He's fucking, I mean, dude, he's a cool dude. Um, you know,

I don't know. Like everybody that we've had would be cool you know you know the one people would hate the most i could tell you who they would hate the most out of all the guests we've had if we sat here and got drunk it would stir the most shit would be sean whalen oh god hands down yeah yeah he's not gonna fuck what he says no and like not at all half the people are going to hate sean yes i actually fucking think he's hilarious. I don't agree with everything he fucking says, but I think he's fucking hilarious. Yeah, and dude, you know what's cool about Sean?

Is that what he says, he believes, and he has reasons for believing it. Yes. And so if you fucking- He's convicted about it. That's right. Right. So even if you don't agree, and you get in a little argument or a discussion about it,

he has the reasons he believes that. It's not just because somebody said it somewhere. Yeah. And I respect that. He's so, he's so polarizing. I have people that have reached out to me and do not like me or will not

follow me because he's mentored me. Dude, I get people that tell me that they're like, I can't believe you're fucking friends with Sean. We have a lot of show. It's cool as fuck. He's a cool dude. Like there's really not many people that I'd rather hang out with. Like he's fucking cool.

Yeah. You know, I'm sorry that his beliefs ruffle your feathers. Right. You know what I mean? Like, dude, if you were, if you shared your beliefs, the way he shares his beliefs, you would ruffle fucking feathers too. But the reason that you don't is because you won't say what you really believe. Yeah. Yeah. He, and he does. he does i mean he everything he believes he says and he believes that and spending i think it's easy to think that oh he's just you just you know saying whatever but like in spending time like i know you have is like no he believes that stuff like everything that he's got a good reason for it and if you're somebody who like i said i don't agree with everything he says i don't agree with everything he says. I don't agree with everything anybody says. If you, if you find yourself agreeing with every single thing somebody says, you're a fucking

sheep. Yeah. You know? And that doesn't mean that you have to like, like people, you know, like, dude, when you start to get successful, you have two kinds of people. You have the kind of people who will tell you yes. And then you'll have the kind of people who will tell you no, just because they think nobody else is telling you no. You know i'm saying so they truly agree with you but because they want to like check you or keep you humble they'll like point that's where the astral goals come in you know what i'm saying they they will say shit like disagree with you just so no one else no one girls do this a lot like when you're dating them no one else no one else will tell you blah blah blah, blah. So I'll fucking tell you. Like they think, you know. And they don't even believe it. Right, exactly.

It's just like, yeah. People do that. So, but the point of what I'm saying is, is like, dude, you shouldn't agree with everything. And that doesn't mean you need to attack every, like, dude, when I see some shit that like Sean posts, I don't agree with, guess what I don't do? Don't like it.

I don't like it. And I don't fucking comment on it. Right. And then I scroll on and then I text them later and I'm like, hey, bro, what about this gun? Or what about this? Like, I don't even fucking think about it like i know i'm not going to agree with everybody so i don't fucking care right you know what i mean i do happen to agree with most of the shit sean says and whatever you believe and i i say this because there's going to

be somebody who's kind of come up with the exception but what whatever you believe is not a threat to me or what i believe. No, me neither. So you can believe whatever you want and I'll agree and other things like, I'll keep doing my life. But you know what's fucking funny, dude? Is like when you're somebody like you or me or Sean or Gary or anybody who puts their fucking shit out there, you got people who will, they will come and they will, they make it their point to like disagree with you in the most like abrasive way possible. Yes. That like,

dude, if they like, if, and if it was in real life, they wouldn't even say anything. They wouldn't say anything. They wouldn't say anything to you. Like,

but on the internet, they got, they write this shit like, Oh fuck you, Andy, you're a piece of shit because you said you like fucking French fries better than nude pictures. You know,

like I fucking hate you. But then I go to their page and i see that they're following me like you're still following me bro like if this made you that mad just leave yes like i don't understand that shit like i have dude i have never one time ever ever ever ever ever ever gone on somebody else's page when i disagreed and fucking commented about it right you know why because dude that's their fucking yard. And you know what? You know what?

And you know what you can do in your yard? Anything you fucking want. If you want to fucking, you could cut your grass however you want. You cannot cut your grass. You can shit in the yard. You could piss in the yard. I piss in my fucking yard.

My neighbors think I'm a fucking Hoosier. You know what? Because I am. You know what I'm saying? And in Missouri, Hoosier means redneck. So, you know, I fucking am. And that's me. Like I'm gonna do whatever the fuck I want in my yard. And like, that's how I see people's socials. Like I see, I see, and you know what the truth is, dude, because I've had this happen to me a lot. Somebody will say something like so over the top crazy. And I'm like, I've gotten it so much now.

And I'm like, damn dude, like this guy's having a fucking bad day. Yeah. And I'll DM him and I'll be like, bro, like I saw that comment. Like you have a bad day. Right. Like, and they'll be like, yeah, fuck you. And I'm like, Hey man, like I'm not like trying to be a dick. I'm just saying like, Hey, you know, you're taking this way too serious.

And you know what happens every time? Every fucking time. like bro you know what sorry i'm sorry yeah i was having a bad fucking day i had a guy message me the other day and he's like he's like your book is 25 bucks and jordan peterson's is 20 and he's a doctor and eric davis is 18 and he's a doctor and Eric Davis is $18 and he's a Navy SEAL and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah about why my book shouldn't be $25. I said, cool, dude, don't buy it or buy the Kindle version for nine bucks. But I don't know what's going on in your day that makes you think like I have to be the brunt end of this. And he wrote back a couple hours later. He's like, bro, you're right, dude. I was having a bad day, man. I'm sorry about that that i had another guy do it on a drunk rant one day like i got that before yeah you know what's funny dude is that you you you can maintain all your power with those people by just not caring right like people don't like

people don't realize like like when i respond back and i'm a smart ass they're like oh you fucking you must really care no dude i'm like on my end, I'm laughing. Like I'm laughing about this. Like I'm sitting there, you just made this rude comment and you're completely irritated, pissed off. And I'm sitting there with my friends or with Tyler or with Emily and we're fucking laughing. Like I'm laughing about it. You know what I mean? Like they don't realize that like on the back end, like it's, I don't care. Like if you follow me, cool. If you don't follow me, I don't care. Like if you, if you cool. If you don't follow me, I don't care. Like if you decided not to follow me,

that's probably a good idea because you're separating yourself from something that irritates you. And that's good for you. So there's places you can go that you will probably resonate with other people's shit. And that's great. And then go do that.

Dude, that's great. Like dude, that's great. Everybody should find what they resonate with and follow that shit. But like, if you're going to come on page and be like, oh, why do you use the F word so much? You know why? Because I fucking like it. And that's how I talk.

And that's what I communicate with. And that's my fucking brand. So if you can't understand that basic aspect of that, you can't question and believe that that may be really how andy talks yeah then you're you're not getting it right like when i say authentic like when i go to christmas dinner and i fucking sit at the table at christmas and people tell me hey andy how's your day there's not probably going to be a sentence that comes out without the word fuck at christmas dinner in front of my grandma and my mom and my fucking whoever whoever happens to be a sentence that comes out without the word fuck at christmas dinner in front of my grandma and my mom and my fucking whoever whoever happens to be there because i'm comfortable being

who i am you know what i mean and if that upsets people i don't know what to do you know oh fine well and you know what though if you you know quote unquote cleaned up your language everybody else everybody else would know there'd be other people i don't why are you the old andy the way you used to right you know people complain about that so dude there's always something i know man it is always going to be something that's what it is dude uh i saw this crazy this meme got sent to me and it was a picture i gotta i gotta fucking pull it up because it's really good um somebody sent me sent me this meme, uh, a while back and it was such a good representation of, of how people are. Um, let's see who sent that to me. I'm scrolling through my phone. It was stormy storm, I believe, which is a brand ambassador for for storm storm three she sent me this meme

and in the top corner it shows a man and a woman on a donkey and it said the caption is these two other people watching them and then the caption uh says two people on a donkey's back poor animal so in the next in the next uh slide it's there the man's on the donkey and the woman's walking it says how cruel he is by letting his wife walk and the next slide she's riding the donkey and he's walking and it says how stupid is he by letting his wife ride on the donkey alone and then on the last on the last slide it shows them both walking next to the donkey and it says fools don't even know how to utilize a donkey right that's the world we fucking live in exactly you're never gonna do it fucking never never you know so just do it do it the way you're gonna do it yeah right the only thing i've ever done if i have

have not liked enough people's thoughts and ideas on their social media thing is just go click that little unfollow button yeah right i've never made a comment or it's like, no, I don't agree. I don't like them. I'm out. Me too. Right. Like, there's shit that irritates me every day. I just decide like, okay, well,

if you irritate me one time, I'm like, oh, that's who they are. You know, that's what they believe. I can respect that. Right. Like, dude, fucking Emily Sears. Emily Sears is a brand ambassador for First Form. All right. She's

got fucking 10 million followers on Instagram. She's super fucking like over the top feminist, right? Like I have a hard time relating to like some of the shit that she gets all worked up about. And I've told her this, but you know what? I respect it. Like, Hey, that's her fucking point of view. That's her page. I don't agree with everything she posts but you know what i respect her and dude half of the shit she posts is hilarious so like when if that level of like not agreeing with her and thinking it was weird or not got to a point where it was like everything she posts guess what i would do i would not follow her just leave right and i wouldn't say hey you fucking suck change your thing for me yeah it's just an arrogant thing to say like, Oh,

change your whole fucking opinions for me. Like, dude, I actually respect people that have opinions about things. Right. At least they have courage. Like I might not understand all the feminist stuff and like all the, the things they got going on.

I don't, I don't understand it. I'll be the first one to admit. I'll also be the first one to admit that like, I don't really try to understand it. Cause like to me, the way, how aggressive it is makes, it doesn't make sense to me. And you know what? I might be

one of the motherfuckers they talk about, like where they say, the one thing they like to say is not all guys, like that's the saying they said. So like, maybe I'm that guy's and I'm not all guys. I don't fucking know. I don't know where to fuck. Like what I do know is like, how would you date a girl like that? Like, like dude, we're like everything you would say would be like, yeah, the wrong thing. Right. Like I'm the wrong thing because I have a penis. So I don't try to understand it. Cause honestly, I don't give a fuck. You know what I'm saying? But that's her, what she's passionate about. And that's what she's into. And I'm cool with that. You know what I mean? Like, I don't, I don't have to argue everything. Like once you let go of like having to be right about everything, dude, your whole fucking world gets a lot less stressful. You know, you don't have to argue everything. Once you let go of having to be right about everything,

dude, your whole fucking world gets a lot less stressful. You don't have to be right. You can understand people are the way they are. They believe what they want to believe. You don't have to fucking change their opinion. That's what I get with these motherfuckers on politics, where they spend hours upon hours upon hours upon hours trying to make their fucking point.

You know why the arguments of politics are so fiery? Because people are so invested in their position that no matter what you say, you will not change it. So why are you fucking spending 50 fucking hours a day arguing with them? It is never going to change. You're better off saying that's how they believe it. Like that's their worldview. That's what they believe. That's been their perspective. That's how they grew up. And you know what? I didn't grow up that same way. So I believe different things. And you know what? We can still have a fucking beer together. You know what I mean? Like, it's just, it's so weird, man. Like I'm just glad I'm like past that point in my life. Cause I used to be like that, dude. I used to be the guy that had

to fucking be right. Like I had to argue. I had, I had so much of that in me. Like if I saw somebody, like if somebody said something and I fucking didn't agree, I have to like say something back and like go, I'd go back and forth on the internet in my own comment section for fucking hours. You know what I do now? I either ignore it or if it's like something rude, I just fucking block them. I don't care. I always, I always just kind of ask in my head, like who,

who, when people get like that, like who are you trying to convince? Yeah. Like, are you trying to convince me or yourself or like, it's usually yourself. It's their self.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. They've got some issues that they're trying to work towards. Right. And it's your fucking fault that they don't see things the way they see it. Right. Right.

You know, or that I'm not compassionate enough to whatever. Come on, bro. Like, hey, for what I care about, the shit I care about in my life, I'm doing pretty fucking good. Yeah.

You know what I'm saying? Like, I don't really care. Like, if you come on my page with some fucking rant about whatever it is you care about, I likely don't give a fuck. You know what I'm saying? Well, you'd be talking about it.

I would be. I'd be talking about it. It'd be important to me. I'd be fucking blah, blah, blah. Like, dude, when people bring these issues to me, like, I don't fucking care. I care about what I care about. Like, just like you care about what you care about,

and you care about what you care about, and you care about putting dudes' penises in your mouth. And that's cool. I don't mind that you... He's talking to Tyler. Yeah, when you... Vaughn, he's totally talking to you. When you finally's talking to tyler yeah when you yes he's totally talking to you when you finally fucking admit to everybody you're gay no one's gonna care bro

like everybody's gonna be like dude okay we already knew that like you know what i'm saying like dude i'm gonna fuck if somebody's gay or if they're black or i don't care about another shit and like you know so tyler when you're when you come out and you're finally out when i'm ready yeah yeah there's a there's a line in to be just as many people around as there is now. There's a line in a movie. I can't remember a movie. And the guy, one of the friends is gay and he comes out and he tells everybody he's gay and he's like coming out of the closet.

Yeah. And they're like. And the guys are like, we already know that. Yeah. He's like, yeah, if you weren't gay, you'd be a really weird dude. Dude, you know what's funny, man? And it's sad at the same time. A guy I've known for a long long time

is is gay and everybody knows he's gay but he won't say nobody knows oh yeah like we legitimately and it's not tyler like it's a different guy but like dude i want to message him or fucking tell him be like bro it's okay man i know you like the meat popsicle bro it's cool man like you know what i'm saying like i like you know I don't fucking care. Right. Nobody really cares. It's okay. Right. Like, dude, if you, if you seriously discriminated somebody cause they're gay or because they're fucking black or eight, you're a piece of shit, like on a different kind of level. For sure. Like it's, it's sad to me. The society hasn't like grown past that. Yeah. Like, and you know, what's fucked up is that the fucking 99% of people, we suffer the consequences of the 1% of the lowest common denominator.

Right. Like people who literally are racist. Right. Or people who literally are homophobic. And then you get the other 99% talking about it and the fucking, it gets tarnished. We all get tarnished because of the scum. Yep. You know what I'm saying?

And like, it's sad because social media is what brought that to the fucking forefront. Like, I almost feel like if we didn't have social, a lot of these issues wouldn't even be fucking issues. Like I feel like racism issue was much less of an issue 15 years ago than it is today. And people argue, Oh,

well that's because we didn't bring awareness about it. No, you're bringing awareness to the worst possible scenarios. Right. And, and applying it across the norm as the norm, not the fucking fucking norm right like dude when these fucking things happen like like there's a racially motivated crime or a fucking uh a gender motivated issue or this or that dude 99% of people are like damn dude that's fucked up right nobody argues that it's not it's a we know

it's a bad thing we're not right yeah and and you know unfortunately because the internet we all get lumped in this fucking these categories because of what gender we happen to be or where our skin color is or where we fucking grew up and dude it's sad you know what i'm saying like i get i'm gender neutral we know like but dude you know like that's the truth you know what's fucked up dude like my friends that that i'm friends with that are fucking gay like tyler like i make fun of them for being gay like my friends who are black i fucking tell black jokes too and they're fine we fucking joke around like they make fun of me for smelling like fucking baloney and i make fun of them you know for what

the black like we we're friends right like it's a fucking joke and like dude people need to calm the fuck down dude like calm down you know what i'm saying like if you're my friend and you're black i'm going to fucking make fun of you because you're black period and it's it's gonna happen so if you're black and we're not friends if you're black and i don't make fun of you and we're not fucking friends you know what i'm saying like if you're gay and i don't make fun of you for being gay and people are like oh my god you're fucking're fucking terrible human. No, I'm not. I'm actually the guy who will get stabbed in the fucking face for that motherfucker. You know what I mean? Like I'm a real friend. I don't look at fucking race and think, oh, he's less than me or look at gay people and think, oh, he's fucking weird or this. Like, dude, it is what it is, you know? And like people are taking things so fucking serious. And so it's just fucking sad, dude. Like it's sad how much anxiety and argument and frustration that people have about, and they'll say, Andy, you don't understand. Cause you're not a fucking minority motherfucker. I

understand. Perfect. You know what I'm saying? I'm a realist. I fucking see what happens. I see the real shit that happens. You know what I mean? I've been in situations where people look at me different and I've lived like that for years at a time, having fucking facial disfigurement. Try working around with your face swollen the size of a fucking grapefruit for three fucking years and scars on it. Look like Freddy Krueger got ahold of you and see how people fucking treat you. They treat you like shit. So I get it. But I know as well as anybody that dude, just because you're Asian or you're black or you're fucking gay, that 99% of the time you're getting treated fucking normal. You know what I'm saying? Sure.

And I think it's a media, it's, it's a big media issue too, because it's sensational, right? It's what to talk about. It's what gets views. It's what gets like,

it's sad, man. Because like, if I feel like it creates tension and like, you can't even tell Joe, like, dude, go watch fucking

go watch eddie murphy raw oh yeah yes yeah or anything by fucking uh um chris rock and or fucking uh dave chapelle but that's why comedians are so valuable because they can say the things that we can't say right dude dave chapelle is the best thing for racial relations in the world like dude the world needs more Dave Chappelle because he will make fun of white people. He will make fun of black people. He fucking makes fun of everybody. And you know what? It's fucking hilarious. And the reason it's hilarious is because it's based in truth. And we all know it. And so dude, everybody out there who's got a little chip on their shoulder about this or that fucking get rid of it dude you're you're fucking hurting yourself you know anyway dude all over the place with this

podcast yes we were but dude it's because what do we talk about today dude it's because it's because we're friends and we're having a conversation you know what i'm saying we're not like there's no agenda here so right dude i love it when you come on the show appreciate it man guys check out his book sovereignty is reallyignty is really, really fucking good. Tell them where they can get it again. Orderofman.com slash book. That'll have all the links. Make sure you're supporting Ryan and taking care of his podcast.

Listen to the podcast. Ryan's one of the good guys. So, thanks, man. Appreciate it. As always, love coming on, man. Talking with you guys. Yeah, me too. Don't cut your beard next time.

No, I'll leave it. I'll grow it out a little bit longer for you. All right, guys. Thanks for listening. We'll talk to you soon.