Real Girls Radio - EP 24: What we WISH we knew before getting into fitness - myth busting

Episode Date: December 7, 2022

Grab some snacks and chillax whilst we chat ABOUT...our flop and fly's, including Milly's dating dillemma...as well as 10 things we just WISH we knew before starting out fitness journey's. You do NOT want to miss this one, I'm sure a lot of people will resonate with this one! We hope we enjoy ☺️ Please share and leave a review, it helps keep this poddy going and it doesn't cost ya a thing xxSupport this show http://supporter.acast.com/e-1-the-unheard-truth-of-millys-journey. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Love this podcast? Support this show through the Acast Supporter feature. It's up to you how much you give and there's no regular commitment. Just hit the link in the show description to support now. This podcast episode is sponsored by Empower Online Coaching. Okay guys, so I'm sure lots of you already know, but I have worked with Emma, who was my coach when I was going through my weight gain journey. Emma, honestly, when I say it was a game changer, I am not even kidding. Just to have that accountability, support and educational guidance, it was honestly such a win. I loved it. Oh, thanks. No, I'm genuinely so proud of you. Honestly, coaching women through their health and fitness journeys is genuinely one of my biggest passions, which is why I set up Empower Online Coaching in the first place. I was just fed up with seeing these cookie cutter plans and one-size-fits-all approaches in the coaching

industry so I really wanted to reinvent the space and create the ultimate personalized health and fitness experience. So Empower Online Coaching is a safe and supportive place for women to get their guidance that they need to reach their health and fitness goals. Whether your goal is to lose body fat, improve your relationship with food, gain weight or build a bum, Emma and her team are your go-to girls. We're basically your in-pocket cheerleader hype girls who will also educate and support you to your end goal. Everything will be housed on the Empower app where you'll get bespoke training programmes, nutrition plans, food inspo, educational ebooks and so much more.

You can log your progress every week through the check-in feature where you'll receive weekly changes, updates and personalised feedback. And you can communicate with myself and my incredible team through the in-app WhatsApp style chat day or night. But just remember, we aren't robots and do actually need sleep. And we have an exclusive discount code for the Real Girls Radio listeners. We've never actually done a discount code for the real girls radio listeners we've never actually done a discount code before you know no so this is very exclusive but if you inquire about online coaching before christmas which is 25th december for those of you who don't know and quote real girls radio you will receive a huge 20 off your coaching subscription. So go to empoweronlinecoaching.com, fill out your

deets and quote Real Girls Radio for 20% off. I said Real Girls Radio. I can't guarantee that your bum's gonna look as good as my face but I will give it a good shot. Love that. Hello and welcome to Bro Girls Radio. I'm Millie. And I'm Emma. And we are both very normal bro girls just like you. Here to talk about all things health, fitness and navigating your way through this crazy life. We're your new besties. We want you to feel part of our weekly chats and we're excited to invite you in to our exclusive girl gang.

Grab some snacks and chillax whilst we chat. Woo! Hello everyone! Hello! Welcome back to another episode. One week closer to Christmas. Oh my god, I can't wait! Have you done eight?

Oh my god, the oven candles! Door number one? Is it door number one? What are you up about? When this episode is out one is it door number one what are you when this episode is out is it door number one oh my god of november yeah it is it is the 30th this is out so door number one's tomorrow guys get your doors ready no way sorry we're door number seven when this episode's out wait let me check sorry guys we're both recording we're door number seven when this episode's out wait let me check sorry guys we're both recording we're door number seven when this episode goes out right so we've got seven chocolates down fuck so far how are we how are you enjoying it are we going well okay so do you want to start with your flop and fly

okay so so my flop is i am questioning myself a lot and like myself on Instagram. Why? I just keep questioning like, am I doing good enough here? Like, am I doing good enough? And I don't think. Where has that come from? I don't know. I don't know. I'm self-doubting, self-deprecating myself.

And I don't know why. I got into a really, really bad headspace with that like a year ago on social media um and getting lost with like the numbers and the view story views and like yeah fuck you i'm telling you now you cannot attach yourself to numbers or analytics on social media i did that for a whole year of my life and it it destroyed me i felt like i was living for social media and I completely stopped living for myself and it was like everything I did had to be documented and content and like it was all for like everything insight was for insights and social media I'm like oh how can I make that into a post and like I was never present you know I think it is actually because I've recently had

to screenshot my insights my recent insights for certain brands and things and it reminds me of my insights yeah and like they're not bad but i'm just being it's just opening up the space for me to criticize myself and question it and question it yeah yeah and especially if you are seeing like fluctuations when it goes up and down up and down like it's not a direct no like impact no what's the and down. Like, it's not a direct... No. Like, impact. No, what's the word I'm looking for? It's not directly correlated to you or who you are as a person or your content. Like, sometimes it literally is the algorithm.

Yeah, just a shitty algorithm. Yeah. Yeah, I know. Anyway, my fly is that I've been going on some dates. I'm dating. Dating life is back in the flow. And I'm loving it it but i'm also not searching for love basically my therapist was like you need to find love within yourself

and then whatever will happen will happen and i know that but i really am now starting to like put that into practice and like i'm genuinely like fuck it like i'm not i've just stopped searching for love i love that no i think that's really good um so are we allowed to know any juicy date deets i get worried that they're gonna listen no they won't listen they really won't listen i promise you hey boys because sometimes like anyway yeah so just don't say anything too rude. No, never rude. Never rude. I've been on a couple of dates with this one guy over a period of like four years, right?

So we came back into the scene and I wanted to give him another go, another shot. But after the date, I just wasn't feeling it. I wasn't feeling it. Like he's so fit. Genuinely, I'll show you a picture after. Oh my God, he's stunning. Okay.

But... So what was wrong with him? I just don't think we vibe like there wasn't like a connection there wasn't like a um how do I explain this no chemistry no chemistry like you know when you find chemistry with something you're like oh okay like I know what sort of chemistry I can get yeah there wasn't that chemistry there and like I've been trying to like, somewhat force it because I've been going on quite a few dates with him and I'm like, right,

it will come eventually. But it's the fourth date now and I'm like, it's just not there. Oh no. It's not there and it's so annoying because he's so fit.

I'm like, why? I guess it's good because it shows you're not superficial and it shows you don't only care about looks. Yeah,

true, true, true, true. You should just say to him, look, you're beautiful but... I do get like, true, true, true, true. You should just say to him, look, you're beautiful, but... I do, and I hate letting people down.

Because he wants to go on a date, and I'm... Yeah, but if you know it's not going to be, like, you know, hateful between you two, and never actually go anywhere, you're kinder to let him down now before he might get feelings. I know, but then I'm thinking, shit, am I losing, like, a potential?

Like, could there be something in the future? Like, is he just nervous? might get feelings i know but then i'm thinking shit am i losing like a potential like could it could there be something in the future like is he just nervous is it like a slow burner yeah are you also like dating other people yeah um but he's the main one that i'm focusing on he's like a repeat repeat i'm like you're repeating for a reason surely but why I know I wonder why you're not vibing I know I wonder why I just don't do you feel like you have enough to talk about yeah we do talk about a lot but I just don't think like I'm not being my I can't be my full full full full full self but I think that's maybe because he's so attractive that I... You put a front on? Sort of, yeah. Not a front.

I'm still very much myself. But like, there's more to me that can be coming out, but it is not. Okay. Because I don't think he is going... He's on that wavelength of... Yeah. I was actually watching a Kristen film last night. And the girl was saying, you have to always date down.

Yeah. Oh my God, I've heard about this. Date down. What's your opinion of that i think it's more because like that works because it doesn't like shock our ego i think it's due to that ego but then like surely everyone will be trying to date down and then like no one will actually be dating now well no no one will be dating the top people. Well, yeah. And then two people can't both be dating now. Down.

Yeah. Yeah, that doesn't work. No. But then who decides who's down or not? You know? It's just stupid. Oh, God. I don't know.

But anyway. My fly. That is my fly. Okay. Lovely. Yeah. My flop is that I have been very ill yeah like for your girl I I think it's going around yeah for sure I saw this TikTok and it was like a person like

imitating the whole of the UK and it was like just loads of coughing and sneezing I was like okay it's not just me then yeah like I know I felt hideous. I think it was Wednesday. I just, I literally couldn't move. Yeah. So bad. So... Is it like that, you know, like you sleep with your mouth open? Yeah, and it's, you know,

when like your whole body feels like you literally have no energy. Yeah. Like, it hurts to cough. Yeah. Like, it hurts to like move your neck. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It hurts to even like...

Talk. Sip water. Yeah. I just feel weak. I just want my mom oh i know every time i'm ill i just want like home comfort yeah and you can't get home if you're not like your home home home no yeah yeah i guess you do um but my fly is that i found a really good practical setup for at home when I'm working. I basically turned my kitchen island into a walking desk. Cool. So my trepid fits perfectly underneath my trepid

and I found a little hidden socket underneath the kitchen island. So I plug it in get my steps through my meetings she's getting all done multitasking multitasking her finest and then I also when I was feeling ill I felt sorry for myself so I went and bought myself um a new blanket from anthropology oh they do blankets I don't think they do blankets and it's 30% off in Black Friday sale and it just looks great do you treat yourself to a blanket i treat myself to a toaster oh my god we're getting old our tree is a blanket and a toaster what else can i treat myself to i don't want to treat myself to something now yeah anything

find something what's on your oh maybe the candle that you said yeah yeah you need that so nice melon something melon and gets money and gets rum dark rum that's it that's the one anyway oh wait sorry and your fly that was my fly that was your fly oh so you've done your fluff and fly sorry about it today she's not listening i hope you guys are listening i am listening um okay so this episode is going to be all about things that we wish we knew before starting our fitness journey yeah because I feel like there's lots of podcasts at the moment about like new year's resolutions and like what you should be like what kind of goals you should be setting for the new year but we thought instead we would kind of like reflect back

and look at what we have learned and failed at in our own fitness journeys to kind of like set you guys up with some tips and advice to hopefully not do the same. Yeah. And I think there's so many things that like people say that we all know, like say rest days, you are so important but like sometimes you just need that reminder and like you need to just drill it in your head yeah but we've got some other things that maybe you might not know that could be useful for you to know um whether you're

at the start of your journey or in the middle of your journey or you know actually to be fair i think we're always at the start of our journey aren't we I had this epiphany the other day because I was thinking like you know I've been into fitness for like years and years and years for like five years but I still sometimes feel like I'm still learning and starting like a different new journey like I feel like this year has been really like awakening wow yeah yeah yeah. There's so many journeys within one whole journey. Yeah, so I actually feel in a way like I'm a beginner. Yeah. But in a new chapter of my fitness journey.

You know what it is? I think there's, say you're on your way to your destination. Obviously, you have to go through those different roads to get to that destination. And those roads are the mini journeys. And we've just turned a new corner. A new corner i love that i like that a lot we should write a book um well should we get straight into it let's get straight into it lovely so one of my things which i wish i knew before starting my fitness journey is that your body doesn't know if you've eaten a banana or if you've eaten a sweet.

Like the simple sugars within it are the same simple sugars. I was so hung up on like certain foods and like, you know, healthy foods and unhealthy foods, quote unquote. When in actual fact, if I really just wanted some sweets, I actually could have just had some sweets. Like it's a great pre-post-workout. Like I don't need to just completely restrict that. And like there is no such thing as good and bad food yeah yeah which I know that you guys know but sometimes like I had this realization like actually my body doesn't know between a banana and a sweet at the end of the day it's just calories and simple sugars and that's it yeah so that's what I needed to know yeah which I knew before I guess I actually have something

that I've learned which isn't like counter to that but it's just a way of viewing things that I didn't really think about before yeah so I like at the beginning of my fitness journey I was very much under that belief and like I would literally not even touch a cookie and I wouldn't like eat chocolate and like if someone offered me like anything processed I wouldn't touch it sweet even if it's like five calories I would absolutely know like that is bad for my body well and then it kind of went to the other extreme where I became like if it fits your macros opposite yes yes yes and like as long as i hit my protein and my carbs and my um you know fats like nothing else matters right whereas now i'm very much believing that food quality really does matter and as much as like having some chocolate or a

sweet or whatever and like allowing your body to eat what it's craving isn't going to hurt you or harm you food quality matters and in a literal sense i do genuinely believe like in ways you are what you eat like your your body is creating new cells every day and a lot of those cells are made up of the foods that you're feeding it yeah so yeah of course if you're craving chocolate like sugary foods and stuff like allow yourself to eat it it's not bad it's not gonna harm you but you do still need to prioritize nutrient dense whole fresh foods not because of the body composition impacts of it but like how it's literally going to provide the building blocks of like your skin and your brain health and clarity your your structure and function and cells like it's so important to feed your body with good

quality nutrition and that is definitely something i wish i knew at the beginning of my fitness journey to stop kind of putting things into like categories of good or bad or like if it fits your macros like it's just like black and white thing yeah black and white thinking it's just like eat a nutrient dense colorful diet and allow yourself to eat things that you're craving and everything will balance well yeah i guess the umbrella term to that is it's actually a lot more simple than you think yeah yeah you over complicate it so much that is it you've a lot more simple than you think yeah yeah you over complicate it so much that is it you've literally hit the nail on the head it is more simple than you think you know prioritize getting good quality food cooking from scratch you know getting a good

amount of fiber and veg and fruit but also don't overthink it if you want to eat a pizza that's it it's just the overthinking. It's so much more simple. Was that your one as well? Yeah, that was one of mine. Oh, lovely. They go hand in hand then. Yeah. My next one is that it's a myth to think the more you work out,

the more you'll progress. Yes. I just always thought that the more I work out, the more muscle I build, the more I'll progress, the more my body will change, blah, blah, blah. we all know that rest is so key but you will learn if you don't learn that rest is key now then you'll learn it later down the line you're gonna learn it eventually so you may as well just stop wasting time and like trying to fit in seven workouts in a week and actually just save yourself from self-sabotage yeah and just rest and then you'll

find yourself progress so much quicker and in a such more efficient way if you just do that now at the start of your journey yeah I actually think as well like not even just in terms of how many workout days you do but the amount of time you spend in the gym yeah that's well definitely that as well yeah I used to think like god if I spent less than an hour oh my god I'm really not being productive in the gym and i guess to add to that it's also like kind of you know the numbers and the time like the number of calories you burn on your apple watch or your fitbit is so arbitrary and it really really really does not indicate whether you've had a good workout or not like no no like just it just it doesn't have any that's just correlation to how hard you've

trained like take that as a fact it just doesn't as long as you've enjoyed your workout you you know if you're on a strength training plan if you progress on your lifts if you walk out of the gym feeling better than you did yeah then you're winning then that is a great work yeah absolutely and also you're bound to feel more shit walking out the gym if you look at your watch and you've not met the standards that you set yourself at the start so imagine taking actually that watch away and like taking that whole mentality around like manicurizing was a good workout just take that all away then you'll be so surprised at how good you do feel after every workout yeah because like there's a lot of time that you do just set yourself up for failure

yeah i i like always put my apple watch on at the beginning of a workout but it's more to like time it because i'd rather be in the gym for as little as possible if i'm doing like a strength training workout like i gotta get in get out to get it done in an efficient way yeah yeah for sure okay my next one is okay this is something that i genuinely wish wish i knew at the beginning of my fitness journey that proper form is so much more important than the weight like let your ego drop i've had to do this a lot lately like i spoke about it when I came back to the podcast after my little situation. I lost a lot of strength, guys. Like I really did.

Like I felt like a beginner. Yeah. Back in August, September, I was like, right, I am starting from scratch. And I had to completely strip back my weights and kind of start just building it all back up again. But thankfully, I now know that the weight you're lifting really isn't that important the important thing is your form your technique your mind muscle connection time under tension time under tension your progression over time progressive overload and I genuinely used to think like oh if I go into the gym and I manage to squat 80 kilos or 90 kilos 100 kilos then I'm gonna build

a great bar but the thing is if you're like lifting in that power lifting style and just kind of going for like one rep maxes of strength your glutes for example if you're trying to build your bum aren't actually going to be under much tension whatsoever because your body's just trying to get that weight up and down yeah you're not connecting to that muscle you're not activating that muscle you're not putting it under tension for it to actually signal to the muscle to to adapt and change so the best thing you can do if you're trying to like improve your body composition with your weight training is to really think about your mind muscle connection improve your form slow down your exercises slow down oh my god the amount of people that i see in the gym like

repping it out yeah fuck just yeah yeah like again like we were saying at the beginning like you're much better off going into the gym for a short amount of time but putting more intention and effort into each and every rep you do um this kind of leads on to my next one okay so my next one is like not every exercise has to be three times like three sets times 10 reps or four sets times 12 i used to always think i had to do like four sets everything and then like because i had to think that i was like oh my god it's gonna take so much time. Then it kind of led into me rushing the workouts, like rushing the exercise. So you just don't need, like an exercise doesn't need all the sets in every single exercise in every single workout.

It doesn't need six exercises in every workout. Like there's so many different ways you can adjust your workout to make it as efficient as it possibly can be. And I think, yeah, that leads on from the last one. But like you don't rush your workouts because you're like trying to fit in all these sets yeah I love that point and that is something I'm actually going to add a bit to because I quite often will program for my clients um especially beginners or those who are really trying to focus on their strength I might literally give them two sets for one exercise yeah for example two sets of Bulgarian split squats and I'll quite often have clients that question me and be like but why am i only doing two sets like i've always done four or five sets

and it's like if you're doing four or five sets of bulgarian split squats i promise you the fourth and fifth set you are going to be so bored and tired and your muscles are going to be fatigued at that point that those two final sets are just junk volume yeah yeah you're just adding extra volume which isn't gonna give you any benefit you're better off doing one or two feeder warm-up sets which i'll talk about in a second and giving it your all to those two working sets and just really trying to like make the most out of every rep because yeah like if you're if you're training with like effort and intensity and doing two sets of every exercise

I guarantee your workouts will be more effective than if you went in and did like four or five sets of every exercise like your cns your muscles will be fatigued and you will not be able to train with the effort required to actually stimulate a change in your body. For sure. So that's a great point. I wish I knew it before. I really do. I wish I knew it five years ago. I used to go in and do like, oh my God,

I think I've said this before on the podcast, but I used to think German volume training was something you did for every exercise. Oh God, you did say this. Oh my God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Terrible. For those of you who don't know, German volume training is 10 sets of 10. was something you did for every exercise oh god you did say this oh my god yeah yeah terrible for those of you who don't know german volume training is 10 sets of 10 which i great i love

it love it did it the other day 10 sets of 10 hip thrusts and then i left the gym finishes me that absolutely killed me i used to do 10 sets of 10 not just on hip thrusts guys squats deadlifts leg curls leg press all in one session and then i'd wonder why i can walk fucking hell and i'd walk out this is the super mindset i'd walk up be like yeah i absolutely killed that session no like your body is not gonna be able to even like build the tiniest bit of at all because there's way too much there that's too ripped up um it's like when miles suddenly when the episode that we had with him on he was like he did five of five no five five sets in every exercise something and i was like even that's so much yeah in every exercise i think

you know periodization five of 15 yeah five five sets of 15 for everything oh there definitely comes a place for like higher volume training like with some of my clients i'll periodize them through training programs you know some of their in one like a session or two whatever yeah and some of their programs for a period of time might be like four sets of eight or like you know five sets of five like going like for more volume or you know changing up the focus but you lower the weight training program yeah a lot of people don't understand that yeah exactly and you'll go through periodization of having blocks of training which are less intense and less volume and then the next phase might be an increase in volume but

if you're training all year round with that like five sets of 10 to 15 for every single exercise you are gonna you're just killing yourself you're working harder than you have to yeah work smarter not harder definitely i worked smart today i just i did three exercises because i ran out of time and i was like, you know what, I'm just going to, I'm going to make this really effective. So I did,

I'm going to get judged now. I did five sets of hip thrusts, eight reps with a five second hold at the end. Oh, I love doing an isometric hold at the end of a hip thrust.

Really fucking burnt it. Yeah. Really burnt my bum. Then I went on to a leg press. I did four sets of 10 on leg press with a superset of a banded kickbacks. Banded kickbacks? And then I did walking lunges.

That's nice. I like that. Yeah. It's a good workout. It was a good workout. Yeah. But I was like, you know what? I'm going to still do this.

And yeah, I may have half an hour, whatever. But I made sure that I tried to make it as effective as I could. And then that is my workout for the day. And it three exercises oh my god that's just literally given me another thing that I wish I knew at the beginning of my fitness journey going to the gym even if you've only got like 30 minutes or 40 minutes you're much better off going in and doing what Millie just said and so giving it your best shot picking like a handful of exercises yeah and going for it rather than thinking no I'm not going to train today because I've not got an hour and a half yes two hours to do 110 exercises and you need to stop focusing on waiting for the perfect time yeah everything to be perfect because honestly guys never is that

ever going to be the perfect time yeah like there will always be things that come up and get in the way of like your workout your food your nutrition like your ability to stick to a plant like that's just life that is life actually that is life and that's why you need to be flexible around your workouts and not be so like rigid yeah you need to be controlling you know that's the word flexible flexibility physically and mentally yeah we're really like bouncing well off of each other today um so this is one obviously this isn't relatable for everyone and I hope it's not relatable for everyone but for my fitness journey, me personally, I wish I knew that losing my period is a lot more dangerous than I think.

And even though I don't, I didn't want kids or I don't want kids now, it's so, so dangerous. And like, this is what I always said to myself when I lost my period. I was like, oh, it's fine. I don't want kids now. Like, it's actually great contraceptive, you know. I'm not seeing any sort of physical problems that are making me think oh god I need to you know get my period back like it's literally just gone so I kind of just sort of forget about it but there is so much going on inside my body that is a huge red flag

and I wish I knew that sooner yeah I wish I didn't spend eight years of my life um where my body was in such an awful state yeah and i think it's gonna it's caused a lot of probably long-term repercussions yeah and that is i think something that people that girls don't realize like of course it affects your reproductive organs and hormones but it also leads to premature osteoporosis. Osteoporosis, yeah. And increased risk of heart and blood vessel disorders. And increasing your anxiety and depression. Lack of bone density is obviously... So you're more prone to injury and hurting yourself. And your white blood cells.

It has so many detrimental effects on your overall health beyond just your reproductive system. Skin. So much. Honestly, so much. Yeah. Do you know what? I wish I knew that as well.

It's just so sad that people aren't taught. Like, I do almost feel like girls, unfortunately, kind of like enter that phase when they're younger. And hopefully we do have some younger listeners hearing us talk about this right now to hopefully stop them going for it but like around the sort of like ages of like 18 to 21 where you might kind of go back into like very well not back into but like you might start those whole disordered eating habits and you know trying to get skinny for whatever reason without knowing the detriments

of doing so yeah and girls like it is not worth it like yeah i know sometimes it looks great when you see girls on social media who have these like popping abs but like the reality is for most females it's just not it's not healthy and it's actually extremely unhealthy yeah to look like that and I think a lot of people that you may see on Instagram who do have like you know ripped havers or whatever you know some of them they genetically have that and that's fine they still have their period but there's also a lot of people out there who don't have their period and there's a lot of like things that are going on behind the scenes which they don't share online and so when I lost my period I thought well one I thought that it was fine like I didn't I don't need kids whatever blah blah

another thing I thought was well I don't see anyone else talk about this so I clearly it must probably not an issue like it's not something that is brought up like you know how a lot of people talk about mental health and like they're bringing a lot of um sort of awareness around mental health so like obviously when you do suffer with mental health it's like oh okay yeah this is obviously something that people go through and when no one talks about losing their period it's like okay I guess I'm just brushing under the carpet yeah talk about that it's weird and so when I spoke about losing my period like there were so many people who came to me and said like oh god I didn't think this was actually much of an issue should I tell my mum like should I go to the doctors or like there were so many questions

around it and I was like god yeah you need to go to the doctors but then obviously the doctors will just put you on the pill and that's a whole nother story I think you just really need to have an honest conversation with yourself and really ask yourself whether your goal is health or to look a certain way for a temporary short term or long appearance yeah or long-term health yeah and like we've both been there we we both relate like I know it's hard to make that decision but like you will be so much happier and healthier if you choose the healthier sustainable way it does worry me because I don't think I've I've lived enough years of having my period um to tell me if like there are any underlying problems like I don't know if I lay down the line when I'm trying to have kids or babies and make a family like I don't know if there's going to be problems there I don't know

if there's going to be problems like when I'm older and maybe I god forbid get something that I'm dying you know diagnosed with and the cause of it is because amenorrhea like who knows I am I was actually making um a client post on the way here today of one of my clients who has regained her period after 17 years i know like yeah it actually gives me oh my god 17 years yeah fuck she looked incredible oh i'm not actually sure what her age is 17 years wow that just goes to show that it does come back because i i think after like probably the two-year mark i was or maybe the three-year mark i thought it's not going to come back yeah same so i was like there's no there's no point trying to gain weight or put on weight or eat

more because i know that like i'm actually just going to gain weight for the sake of what nothing because my period's not going to come back it will you just have to be so patient but yeah you have to be really really really patient you have to just keep going keep going keep going it will come back your body just just doesn't stop working like that um okay this one is for those of you who are beginners getting into fitness starting at the gym i want you all to know that no one is watching you no one is judging you everyone is so focused on what they're doing and how they look and what they're working on that they probably don't even notice you i know it can feel like when you walk into the gym like everyone is staring at you because you're the new person you don't know what you're doing but probably there's like 20 other people in there who are thinking exactly i was gonna say this like the p like everyone who you think are looking at you

they're probably say if they are looking at you they're looking at you because they're worried that you're looking at them yeah literally that's what it is yeah yeah i mean i do the same yeah even now i do yeah yeah i look at people thinking that they're looking at me and they're not but they're probably thinking in their heads fuck she's looking at me she's watching me well I I actually think you just need to go in and be confident and remember like you're there for you like no one else and everyone else is there for themselves if they are there for the right reasons obviously yeah well like it's actually like when you think about it it's actually such a nice place yeah it's the love like everyone's there trying to better their self in some way yeah

yeah I do love that and then like another like add-on to that is also like I wish I knew when I go to the gym I don't need to go there to look a certain way and go there to look cute and pretty or to prove yourself to prove myself and like I used to like i wrote about this in one of my posts the other day but like i used to go to the gym and if i didn't look what i thought in my head like really good or like if i looked a bit bloated or if i didn't think i looked lean i like wouldn't want to go to the gym because i'd be like no mirrors people gonna judge me like you're not there to walk around looking pretty you're there to enjoy yourself have a good workout like work on you and smash a workout like now like in the past i would never go to the gym

if i felt bloated and i would never go to the gym wearing like a baggy t-shirt or jumper but it's actually such an empowering feeling just going to the gym throw on like a baggy jumper or t-shirt or like even if you're not and you're just a bit bloated and just smashing your workout and you're there for you yeah like I just think mindset is everything going into the gym yeah I agree although it is obviously nice to put on a cute gym outfit and feel good about yourself but I'm just saying like not all your workouts need to be about proving yourself I think like and looking a certain way when because I because I've definitely been there as well. And I think when I think about that now, I'm like, I was just trying to give myself an excuse not to go. And I think that also ties in with my motivation behind going to the gym.

And it was always for appearance. It was always to look good. And like when that is your goal and your only goal to go to the gym, the motivation isn't going to be there. And you will find excuses not to go. And so that was always an excuse for me like oh fuck i look bloated i'm not gonna go yeah that's so true i think it's much easier for you to say no to that gym appointment that you set yourself when it is that sort of girl yeah when it's completely external driven i think that's another good good one like at the beginning of your fitness journey you really need to like figure out what your your true meaning and your true why behind you being there like what that is um because if you really know what your why is that's gonna hold you so much more grounded

to committing to that goal and actually showing up and being there yeah um like i i had a client the other day who said it was so lovely in her questionnaire she wrote that she wants to start her health and fitness journey because she wants to be like an active mom for her kids oh and she wants to lose weight so she can like run around her kids and be a good role model yeah that's really sweet and then she sent me a picture of her kids eating the like cake oh that's so cute i just think having like a really strong reason other than just like your aesthetics can really help you when you're having those demotivated days because it's for like a deeper purpose exactly and i also think to turn to that look like have good role models that you look up to do you remember the days when like we would all

sort of put victoria's secret models as our phone background or something to remind ourselves that like you know that's what we need to achieve yeah like that wasn't a good role model for me that wasn't someone that i should have actually looked up to i should have been looking up to people who were like healthy happy living a life as well as in the gym like you know finding a great balance like that's what my role model should have been right from the start yeah so I think finding real good role models are really good yeah but I guess to add to that is like be careful who you follow on social media and make sure like of course it's okay to follow people for like how they look or like if you find it like inspirational motivational but if your entire feed and social following um is full of like incredible looking physiques and people like it's gonna come a point where you just feel a little bit deflated if your

results aren't matching up to that because it's constantly reminding yourself yeah and like what you were saying a minute ago like you know a lot of these people are probably like and not going through some shit that you just don't see not that healthy or not being that honest about social media or maybe they're just genetically gifted but like you can't be comparing yourself because you still have a life to live and the ultimate goal really should be to be happy yeah for sure preach it reach well that's my list done yeah i mean i one more i guess it's just like a very like generic but it is so is it the scales no but that's a good one um consistency okay and patience yeah progress is not linear yeah like that whole point like

i just i have to remind this to my clients all the time like you actually when you go into a fitness journey you almost have to like expect that there is gonna be weeks and times where you like drop off or you go backwards and regress or like you have to stop and you know rest not quit and you know things don't go as smooth sailing as you would have hoped but like the minute you start to understand and appreciate that is literally part of the journey yeah and it it really is just something you need to accept and work through yeah it does help you like get through those low moments yeah definitely if you're attaching your progress to week after week of making

progress and like adding on to that like you're just setting yourself up for like false expectations because it's not gonna happen and like when you aren't meeting those expectations you're gonna feel so shit and yeah you are so you just need to kind of like take a much more sustainable approach, but be consistent with it. Be patient with it. And yeah, like Millie said, just know like progress is not linear. It's going to go up and down. It's very normal. And like it'd be boring if it's linear, you know.

No challenges. Yeah. We love a little challenge. We love a challenge. The set up, no, the set back is the set up for the comeback. I like that. Is that your quote your quote then no it wasn't the setup is the setback for the comeback the setback sorry the setback the setback is the setup for the comeback i like that a lot and a comeback is a great feeling yeah i like that a lot okay next time someone tries to bring you down, remember this.

Confidence is quiet and insecurity is loud. Oh, that's actually so true. Like, if you're confident, why would you try to bring someone else down? Insecurity will bring out, you know, jealousy and envy and cruelty. My one is quite cringy, but I love a little cringy quote. A diamond is a chunk of coal that did well under pressure. Oh, love it. We love a diamond.

We love all diamonds, okay? So when you're not, I guess it's, you know, the progress isn't in yet. Like when you're not put under pressure, when you're not put through a challenge, I'm afraid so, you're not going to be a diamond so let's all try you'll be a grubby

little gem but you're not because you're all diamonds yeah you're all diamonds but just remember that whenever you

do feel like oh like I don't know low or like challenged or whatever like anything that's come to you and you're like shit yeah just remember

diamonds are quite literally made under pressure yeah like they need that pressure to be sparkly they need that so yeah anyway hope you love this episode hope you like this episode lots of lessons there things we wish we knew make sure you share share any yeah and again i know we say this all the time but like we really appreciate those of you who yeah support and share the show and you know tag us in your stories or just message us to let let us know because guys like we don't actually gain anything from this no like we literally don't get anything no we actually need to like i don't think we've

ever said that like we are literally doing this like like just literally for you guys we don't gain anything from it no so yeah just we don't get so yeah if you do share like generally it means it makes us you know feel really nice yeah happy yeah you know like we would love and like hopefully you guys find this helpful and valuable so you know you might help someone else out exactly by sharing it yeah so anyway we love you love you lot see you next week bye