Real Time with Bill Maher - Bonus Bill – Ep. #440
Episode Date: October 9, 2017Listen in on the jokes only Bill’s audience got to hear. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome to an HBO
podcast from the HBO late-night series,
Real Time with Bill Ma.
It's not the size of the crowd.
It's the enthusiasm that they have.
And I appreciate that
because America had another
fucked up week.
Right?
Puerto Rico, Las Vegas.
You know it's bad
when you only have to say
the names of the places.
And we know what we're talking about.
Fortunately, we have a president
with an uncanny ability
to say just the right thing
at moments of tragedy.
Did you see what this moron?
Oh, and by the way, moron, did you hear Rex Tillerson,
his secretary of state, called him a moron?
How about a handful of
So Rex Tillerson calls his boss the president a fucking moron,
not to his face.
Trump hears about it, gets mad, makes Rex Tillerson hold a press conference
to deny he called him a moron, something a moron would do.
And Rex Tillerson,
gets out there, has the press conferences,
and basically says,
I remain loyal to the fucking moron.
I mean, you can't make this shit up.
Anyway, finally, the moron went to Puerto Rico,
uh, this week.
Imagine having to deal with a historic category five disaster.
And the hurricane was bad, too.
And then he tells them,
you've thrown our budget out of whack.
Yes, because that's how presidents handle disasters.
They tell people, remember Bush, after 9-11,
He got on the rubble with the bullhorn.
This is going to be pricey.
He talked to one survivor
for a minute and then at the end said,
have a good time.
A good time?
He talks to disaster survivors
like he popped into a wedding at Mar-a-Lago.
Lovely the hurricane.
Try the fudge cake.
Have a good time.
And then the
Ciesta resistance,
he launches paper towels.
Look at that.
Into the crowd.
Like it's some sort of celebrity public appearance event.
One woman held up her hungry baby and he signed it.
So to recap, the message from President Salt in the Wound to the People of Puerto Rico is, this is costing us a lot of money.
It's not as bad as other disasters.
I'm doing great.
Quit your bitch and have some paper towels.
Trump out.
Thank you.
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