Real Time with Bill Maher - Bonus Bill – Ep. #460
Episode Date: May 14, 2018Listen in on the jokes only Bill’s audience got to hear. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO Late Night series Real Time with Bill Ma.
Because you heard he pulled out of the Iran deal.
That's the big news this week.
Yeah, we had a nuclear deal with Iran.
The deal has already had effects.
Iran and Israel today exchanging missile fire, blowing each other up.
I don't know where this is leading, but luckily Jared's on it.
He said, you guys cool it.
This looks really bad on my resume.
make. No, Jared's going to use the philosophy that's got it in this far in life. Speak softly and
carry your wife's purse. So anyway, it's Mother's Day on Sunday. Are you all ready for that?
It's a good day for moms, right? They don't have to do housework. Of course, at Michael Cohen's house,
he already does the laundering. Yeah, it turned out Michael Cohen, that's Trump's idiot
mall lawyer. He has been
running a slush fund for anyone
who wanted access to Donald Trump.
It was called essential consultants.
There was no employees,
no website, no nothing.
And then people just started putting money into it.
Up to $4.4 million
for insight into
understanding Donald Trump.
He's a fat, blonde idiot. What is there
to understand? He's a
horny, lying tub of
dayglow dog shit. Hey, me.
There. I love that title.
essential consultants
because collusion ink was too
on the nose
Michael Cohen
known as the fixer
the only thing he's fixing is to go to prison
but one of the people
who was putting money into this
turns out to be a Russian oligarch
named Victor Bexligsberg
who is good friends with Putin
how do we know he's good friends with Putin
he's alive
we got another sex scandal
New York Attorney General Eric Schneiderman
he's been
accused of slapping and strangulation by these women.
And today Anthony Wiener said,
whoa, all I did was choke the chicken.
Yeah, and you know his excuses?
Eric Schneiderman, he says he was role-playing.
He's so wrong to grab a woman by the neck.
If he had grabbed her by the pussy, he could be president.
All right, thank you very much, folks.
We got more.
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