Real Time with Bill Maher - Bonus Bill – Ep. #492

Episode Date: April 16, 2019

Listen in on the jokes only Bill’s audience got to hear.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late-night series, Real Time with Bill Maugh. Thank you. That's okay. Thank you very much. Thank you. Okay.

Thank you. Thank you very much. How are you doing today? Okay? Wow, that's a good mood because, you know, it is tax day Monday. Among the corporations, by the way, this year, who will be paying zero, zero taxes, Chevron.

General Motors, Amazon, no taxes, Delta Airlines, IBM, no taxes. If you're a liberal who's more mad at Joe Biden than this, you need to watch more schoolhouse rock. Now, the other tax story is that the IRS, you know this, was supposed to give Trump's tax returns. Of course, that didn't happen. It's just a complete Mexican standoff. The Democrats citing this very clear law. that says the Treasury Secretary shall, the word is shall furnish Trump's tax returns, and Trump citing a very obscure statute called Fuck You.

But we don't have that. We're not the rule of law. Did I say our attorney general? Silly me. Trump's Attorney General. You know, this guy, William Barr, yes, he testified yesterday about the Mueller report. I tell you, if a report that finds a guy totally innocent, it sure does. taking forever to black out the bad parts.

And Barr keeps saying it's going to be released next week. He said it would have been sooner, but he's suffering from redactors cramp. So speaking of spying, Julian Assange, we got them, ladies and gentlemen. Julian Assad, the founder of WikiLeaks, the main guy at WikiLeaks, he's been

holed up, you know this, in the Ecuadorian embassy in London for seven years, not in good health, gotten a lot older now. He gets up three times a night to leak now. And Trump has begun his spring purging. He got rid of everyone

in any department at Homeland Security. Yeah, Trump tweet fired a number of them, including Kirsten Nielsen, the head of Homeland Security. He does a lot of that. He fires you by Twitter. I hope Melania realizes that someday her turn is going to come, and it's just going to be on Twitter. As of today,

Maloney is no longer my wife. I'd like to thank her for her service. I wish her well. collusion. So the White House is now being run by Stephen Miller. You know Stephen Miller? He is a 32-year-old virgin who was he

he says he's deeply affected by 9-11 because that's the day his hair started falling out. Catch all new episodes of real time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10 or watch him anytime on HBO on demand. For more information, log on

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