Real Time with Bill Maher - Bonus Bill – Ep. #509
Episode Date: October 1, 2019Listen in on the jokes only Bill’s audience got to hear. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late-night series, Real Time with Bill Maher.
So maybe you're happy. I think I know why you're happy. It's finally happened.
217 Democrats and one independent have voted to open impeachment inquiries into President Trump.
But, you know, people want to know what is this about. Same thing it was about last time in 2016.
You can't try to get foreign help in an American election. We're Americans. We fight amongst ourselves.
but when it comes to help, you can't get foreigners to do it.
It's very fundamental.
And Trump did this again.
He called the Ukrainian president, Zelensky, okay, and asked for a favor.
You know, it's always very mafia with him.
All his phone calls sound like he's slicing garlic.
Trump said yesterday, no quid pro quo, like he knows what that means.
Two days ago, we thought quid pro quo was the president of Vietnam.
But he looks a little depressed.
about this one. I saw him yesterday
at his press conference. I dare
use the term, but he looked
low energy.
He really, it was sad.
Sad. I think
it looked like he finally lost the will to
lie.
And he keeps
calling this phone call. He had perfect.
What the fuck does that mean?
What is a perfect phone call for him?
It means he didn't drop the phone in the toilet.
That's what a perfect phone call is.
But what's interesting about the call and the transcript that we read yesterday is this president of the Uca Rayn Zelensky.
He apparently got the memo that the way to get whatever you want from Trump is to completely kiss his ass.
He talks about, he says to Trump, this great opportunity to learn from him.
And that he's using Trump's skills and knowledge to do his job.
That Trump is a, exactly.
That Trump is a great teacher.
I don't know if this constitutes treason.
I think it constitutes phone sex.
But the
Republic has just looked desperate
defending this. Devin Nunes, remember him?
Remember Devin Nunes?
Californians might know him
because he's from here in California.
He claimed the Democrats
tried to obtain nude photos
of Trump.
Devin represents the San Joaquin Valley,
which is famous for nuts.
All right, thank you very much.
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