Real Time with Bill Maher - Ep. #510: Howard Stern, Senator Amy Klobuchar

Episode Date: October 12, 2019

Bill’s guests are Howard Stern, Senator Amy Klobuchar, Ben Domenech, John Heilemann, and Shawna Thomas. (Originally aired 10/11/19) See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Welcome to an HBO podcast from the HBO late-night series Real Time with Bill Maugh. Start the clock. Please, I got to live with it every day. Thank you. I know why you're really happy because you're not in the fire. More fire out here.

You know what? Brian Williams said this the other day. It's so true. If this PG&E, that's our gas and electric company, turned off power for a million people that happened in New York, be national news all the time. Right? You know what's going on here? The Santa Ana Wins, you know this, they're picked up. So Pacific Gas and Electric shut off the electricity to a million people

in case a spark from one of their wires would start a wildfire. How's that for logic? Everybody stay inside and light dozens of candles in every room because we don't want to start a fire. In other news, the President of the United States is going to be impeached because he treats subpoenas like parking tickets. He has gone full stonewall on this Ukrainian thing

refuses to turn over any documents ordering witnesses not to show up to testify you know as innocent people do he's pulling that old trick that the guilty always do ignoring the crime and acting outraged about the investigation guys know this one you know

honey it's not about the dick pics I sent to your sister it's the fact that you were snooping in my phone That's the real crime. This is... This is the great irony of the Trump presidency. Foreign criminals, that was what he got elected on. They have to be kept out of this country unless they're here to steal our elections.

Then it's okay. Oh, no, no, no, no, please. Apparently, that was not a joke. Apparently, that was a think piece. does not deserve applause. Anyway, but the guy who is, of course, his errand by Rudy Giuliani, now trying to link the Bidens

to Romania. First, it was Ukraine. Then it was China. Now it's Ukraine. Now it's Romania. He's Dora the conspiracy explorer. He's all over the world hunting for this shit. And that is the story that will not go away.

I know Trump wanted to, but it will not. The Trump was using Giuliani to investigate Joe Biden. By the way, what a perfect story for Halloween season. A pumpkin using a vampire to attack a mummy. It's a perfect story. And we found...

I can't make this out. We found out that the vampire has an assistant whose name is literally Igor. Did you see this story on the news? Igor Fruman and Lev Parnas. these are two of Rudy's associates Ukrainian-born who are helping him to dig up dirt on Joe Biden. He had lunch with them yesterday,

and then hours later they got arrested trying to skip the country. Oh, yeah, there they are. Seems like only yesterday they were chasing McCauley Culkin around his house. That's not even the worst of the week. Today, Trump threatened sanctions on Turkey and to destroy their economy

for invading Syria and sluttering the Kurds, something he gave them the green light to do four days ago. But we can't have a female president because they're impulsive. It was, really? It was...

It was only four days ago that Trump was like, fuck the Kurds. They didn't help us in World War II. He said that. They didn't help us in... So, wait, now, we punish anyone who didn't help us in World War II? Because, you know, who didn't really help us

in World War II? Germany was no... help at all. And I haven't even gotten to the rally. Did you see that that he had last time he was in Minnesota? Okay? And longest one ever went on for

an hour and 40 minutes. It went so late, his orange glow went into night mode. And he kept doing that nasal sniffing thing that he does. That one is not his fault. He suffers some treasonal allergies.

But it was, oh, it was vintage Donald Trump at a rally. He called us political opponents, very sick, deranged people who want to get this, erase your future. He called Elon Omar, America-hating socialist. He said Pelosi was either really stupid or she's lost it. And then he got to the point of his speech. You can't elect Democrats.

They're too divisive. That one I actually thought was a joke. You never know. And he also bad-mouthed J-Z. And J.C. said today, you know, I got 99 problems, and a whiny little bitch is one. He also said this. He said, in his rally lesson, he said, Biden was only a good vice president because he understood how to kiss Barack Obama's ass. And Mike Pence said, good one, boss.

Oh, and this is my favorite story of the week. Pence's wife, Karen Pence, was talking at a women for Trump rally. And she said the words, if you support President Trump, don't be afraid to get down on your knees. Just push Hannity out of the way. All right, we've got a great show. We have John Heilman, Shawna Thomas, and then Dominic.

And here a little later we'll be speaking with Senator and presidential candidate Amy Klobuchar is at the end of the show. But I'm very happy to have my first guest here. He hosts the Howard Stern show. Can you guess so it is? He is here in L.A. to launch the Sirius XM. Hollywood Studios.

His third bestseller is Howard Stern. Comes again. The King of All Media. Howard Stern is a great. I tell you, Bill, very exciting. You know what it is? I'm never in Los Angeles, so it seems very exciting when I am here. Back in New York, no one pays attention.

That's bullshit. I love it here. You know, it's fun. Really? Because I've listened to the last couple. I've listened to you all the time, and you have a lot of anxiety, just about the packing. Why so much anxiety? It's not Vietnam in the 60s. You know, Los Angeles. For me, it is. Really?

Yeah, yeah. It's like, I don't like to travel. I like the comfort of my own. own home studio. But I have to say it was kind of fun coming out here. You know, with weed being legal... You don't smoke weed. I don't smoke weed, but everyone is very quiet.

It's very nice. Very peaceful. I like it. But I know you, you know, you love your home and you love your quiet studio, but come on. The one thing you don't get, and don't tell me you don't like it, is that. Well, oh, very, this is... Stop it. Stop it.

You love that. This is love. I like this, but when I'm working, and I'm, you know, because I wrote this book, you know, part of the thing that I like about doing these interviews is that there is no audience, that the audience, it's quiet in the studio, you forget that you're on the radio, and a lot of truth comes out. You were a guest on my show, and I thought that you were amazing, and you really were. And I thought we had this great discussion about your career in comedy.

Everything. 90 minutes it went. It went 90 minutes. And it was, that's what I love about satellite radio. Yeah. The fact that... Well, not a lot of people could do it. You do it, right?

You get people to be confessorial. Why? Well, I think it's because I'm genuinely interested. And I'm inquisitive. I have a lot of questions. And I often say this. And I think I told you this, that I got involved in psychotherapy. And I really enjoyed the process of sitting there and being listened to.

And I thought, Well, if my guests could really be listened to and really be heard, it might be a really nice experience. And because I was on satellite radio and we had so much time that I could sit there with someone and not cut them off, but give them an opportunity to really express themselves. And I ended up with this great collection of interviews with some of my heroes. You know, it's great.

It's a terrific book. Thank you. Now that we've plugged it. We didn't plug it for Christmas, but that's okay. That's right. It's thanks, Halloween. I swear to you, that's why I can. came out to LA, the publisher said, you know, it'd be great

if you got out there and pushed your book for Christmas. You're a man of your word. And I did it. I did it. You said to me at Jerry Seinfeld's birthday party. You said, I will do your show and that's rare. You don't do a lot of shows, so I appreciate it. And by the way... And you know what's weird... Thank you. But you know what's weird about this show? I've been sitting in my hotel room all day,

obsessing about it because it's a weird time out here in L.A. in terms of the actual time that you go live. Seven. And I found that... Yeah. I sat in my room. No, it's weird for me because I go to bed at 8 o'clock. I'm like a big baby. So I'm like, should I...

I was like, should I eat dinner before I come to Bill's show or not? And what would I eat? I mean, these were big decisions. Right. And then I was actually going to be very L.A. and go to the pool and hang out. And I went, now, if I do that, my hair won't dry in time. And I do want to look my best for this show. So there you go.

There was my date. So, but I'm happy to be here. I'm happy to have you. And I'm very happy that we got to be friends again, because I swear to God, but it's too long. I swear to God, when I listen to you, I think there's only two sane people left in America, and it's me and this guy I'm listening to.

I swear to God, because I invariably agree with you on everything, everything that comes up. Well, I felt awful that we weren't talking for so long, because I'm such a fan of this show, and I think this show is so necessary right now, And Bill's voice. And I'll say one other thing, if I may. I really am shocked.

I know you probably don't care about winning an Emmy, and I know you've been nominated, but you've never actually won. 40 times. Is it really 40 times? 40 times. I mean, give the man an Emmy already. But see, this is...

I mean, not many guys are working live. But this gets about something else we have in common. Yes. Why I don't win that Emmy? We're honest people. People don't like honest. they say they do. The fans do. But why, why, if

if Hollywood is such a liberal town, you would think Hollywood would be... Because that's why you and I are the last sane people, because we're liberals, but we don't go for all the bullshit on the far left. Right, right, right. And maybe that's, I don't know what it is. And that's not good enough for the

liberals who vote at the academy. So you think that the academy is that well thought out, and they're conspiring against you. Look, when I, but I don't I really do think you deserve it. I appreciate that. But you know what?

Winning, that's for losers. That's right. But it's interesting because, you know, we do have this other parallel. I mean, I moved here in 2003. You moved to Syria's to off terrestrial in 2005. Greatest thing that ever happened to me. Me too. Yeah.

We both had these second acts. Yes. Right. In places. For me and for you, it's true. When the United States government decided to go out. after me, you know, the censorship, the religious right, it really was mind-boggling

because the stations that I worked for were being fined. It was a form of racketeering by the United States government. They were preventing these companies that hired me to do further business. So I was really boxed in. I felt my show was being edited to death. It was just

debilitating. So moving to satellite radio was a godsend. And really, it just freed me to do what I really wanted. So, you know, for me, the show has never been better. And in terms of my life, I just feel a lot more relaxed. Well, because again, like we are, what Frank Sinatra would have said was in the autumn of our years. Yes, I know. I know. It's very depressing. We've talked about it. By the way, not a wrinkle on your face. Is that right? That's pretty amazing. And God knows your fault.

Oh, you're so homophobic. You're the one who puts that shit on your hands every day. You know that's not good for you. I'll get to that later. I gelled 15 times. That's horrible. We have to... I got to go to Vegas right after the show. I know you wouldn't stay anyway. But we have to talk about health. Offstate sometime.

Yes. You have some shitty ideas about it. Okay. About health? Yes, you do. What are you talking about? I'm not going to talk about it here. I want to talk about many other things we have limited...

You know I'm on Meta Musil right now? Okay. Extra fiber. You have no idea how that changed my life. When my doctor told me to go on Metamusel, I was like, that's for old people. I don't do that. Change my life.

Toto Toilet, Pelot. I know. I know. What are you talking about? Okay. All right. But what's so amazing is that when I hear you talk about so many things, I wrote you this note about when you were talking about show tunes in your house. Yes. I'm like, oh my God. You think you heard my boy Bill a lot? Oh my God. My parents played damn Yankees. We all had the same boomers. We all had the same childhood. And yet, as you point out, the one big difference between us is I am in a community. committed loving relationship with a woman. And you, you know, the amazing thing, the amazing thing about Bill Maher, and by the way, I worked with Bill Maher's father. Yes. When I worked at NBC Radio, he was a fabulous guy. And there's no, you know, this is so rushed.

I should really have the whole hour to myself. Yes. Come back and you can. I listen. But I wanted to say, the thing we really should get into, we really should get into this. I don't understand.

Like, I don't even see you. Why are you leaning into me for this? I don't see you. I don't see you. This is why I don't have a relationship. I'm a little too close. I know you're a heterosexual male. But what is it?

Do you ever have like a serious girlfriend where? Because we don't see you anywhere. Okay, first of all, this is my interview of you. Sit back. We need way more time. Way more time. But let's, but let me see something. Are you alive?

Oh, get that. Some people might say when you're married, you're not alive. Some people are. I am so happily married. I know, but that's you. People are so personal about this issue. No, no, no. We don't have to judge.

You're not better or I'm not worse because we have different. Do you have a girlfriend? I don't need a girlfriend. You don't need one? Not in the traditional sense. Depends on what you mean by girlfriend. Is there someone that maybe you hang out with that you adore and makes you feel good? Yes.

But isn't it fun to? But it's not one person. And that's where we're different. You're so angry. I'm not. I'm angry. We're having fun. But you're taking over my show.

So you don't know how to... Go ahead. You ask me a question. My question was good. Why are you so fucked up? No. That's going to take more than a minute. No, I know.

Why? I mean, you're in therapy. I don't get that. And you've been in therapy? Therapy changed my life. life. I know, but you said 25 years? Yeah, 25 years. To me, that's a scam.

It is not. Really? Don't even put that out there. In my book, I do explain why it was so important in my life. It made me a better father, made me a better human being. But when are you done? Made me happier. When are you cured? You know what? I don't know that I'm cured, but I need someone to talk to who can... You talk every day. But that's not. That's not real. Stop it. You know.

Come on. Okay. But talk of mental health. If I could say, the woman thing. I heard you with Demi Moore this week. Jennifer Anderson. And you've said this too. You, because your mother was depressed and you took it upon yourself to cheer her up. Yes. You have this savior complex

with women. You're Captain Savajo. You're right. No, you're right. My mother was profoundly sad. My mother lost her mother when she was nine years old. And being raised by a woman who had no mother, in a sense, needed a parent. Right.

And, yeah, I did spend a lot of time with my mother trying to cheer her up and trying to make her happy. And I didn't want to see her sad. And I think that has carried over in my adult life. My relationships with women, I kind of look for someone and I tried to be all things and be, you know, a hero and all of that stuff. And that's not healthy. And that's one of the reasons I went into therapy.

And I think my relationship with my wife now is a lot more even keeled because I'm not sitting there trying to save her. I mean, except from me. But, you know, imagine me crawling on top of you. I think somebody lifestyle. I mean, Bill, think about it. It's not a pleasant experience. It looked like it was about to happen.

I mean, when you got divorced, I remember a lot of people said, you know, what saved Howard, because that was back when you were an asshole. And I told you on your show, I was an asshole too. I just wasn't an asshole to you. I was an asshole to you, and I take full responsibility. I know. And I appreciate that so much. And I apologize for that.

I really do because I love the guy. And by the way, one of the great things about being this age, even though we are older, and the bad thing is we'll be dead sooner. Right. The fact that when we were young, not just you, somebody feuds and fights. When you get to this age, it all seems stupid, and you just, it's all about forgiveness and making up.

But that's why therapy really is a good thing. I didn't need it. I got there. But, okay, that's you, but I was at war with the world. I was, I was a guy who was very angry, and I was angry if anybody had a listener or an audience, that wasn't mine. Right. So I was competing with everyone.

And it led to a lot of friendships that broke up. Right. So in any case, that's another reason that therapy was good for me. Not for you. Because you're perfect. Right. No, no.

I'm not perfect. He is perfect. He is perfect. He's 17 women he's dating. He thinks he's wonderful. That's a lot closer to truth. I'm sure they're thrilled with you. Okay.

It's personal. Some people need therapy and marriage, and some people. Don't. About these women that you... Okay. Let's not... No, no.

We're not... Where are they? No, no. I invite you to call on my show with all 17. It's my question. Yes. It's my question... Yes.

My question... It's not 17. How many? Stop it. 14. Give us a number. Where do you hide them? Stop it.

So, when you got divorced, a lot of people said, you know, the reason why Howard was able to be an asshole is because his saving grace was he loved his wife. And in America, there's nothing better than you can do, to love your wife. So it's like we forgive him for all the asshole stuff. Now that he divorced, he's going to lose that. The fans never left. No, they didn't. And you know what? And it's just such a good lesson. You know, my fans are very loyal to me. And I think the reason they didn't, yeah. And I think the reason, seriously, that they didn't leave is that I was up front

and honest with them. And I never, I never tried to present myself like the religious right does. Oh, you know, we have the perfect relationships and marriages forever and this and that. I didn't lie about that kind of stuff. And, you know, when you present yourself as holier than thou, then people call you a hypocrite. But if you say, look, I'm human, and not everything works out, I think people are willing to forgive it. Absolutely. And the thing that I love that you're most honest about, that no one's honest about, jealousy. It's a theme in your show. Yes. You know, you always say it when you are jealous. And I'm jealous all the time. Right. And I'm jealous of things you have, not the personal stuff. Right. I'm jealous that, you know, you, you, you

get away with shit, I can't get away with. And that always... Why is that? Because, first of all, you don't have a politically correct audience. This is a good audience, but I sometimes have to fight my way through that bullshit. By the way, one of the things, when I interview Bill recently... You have total support when you talk.

You only have Robin, who's awesome. Right. And that's it. Very awesome. You don't have to... Right. Because that's the advantage... I am such a recluse and seriously shy. I know. That going into radio for me as a young man was perfect. I would sit in these booths by myself in the beginning, and I wouldn't have to look at an audience,

and it was fabulous, because who wants to look at an audience? I just would imagine one guy in his car, and that's who I was broadcasting to. And you, you know, and quite honestly, you said to me in the interview, as much as you love your audience, you also would, you fantasize about not having these people here, and you can all leave right now. Actually, they're getting better. They're getting better. They're behaving better. Well, we're trying. But it bothers you to have the live audience as well. It bothers me, to not be able to say the thing I want to say that they really agree with, but because

they're out in public, they have to be, oh, we're good people, we can't laugh at that, or we have to groan to show that we're good people. That shit pisses me off. And by the way, as a broadcaster, as one broadcaster to another, I have to tell you it is very liberating. I'm not sitting there being monitored. It is right. It's only my own fantasy that's going on. I listened to you last week, and you

had an Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonator. It's fascinating. And he did 20 minutes on Robin. I'm I got to come on your tits. Robin, I'm coming. I'm jerking off right now. I'm sluging all over you. And then I listened the other day,

and you have a special guest, and I hear Arnold Schwarzenegger's voice, and I think, oh, it's another Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonate. It's the real one. It was the real one. The real one came on. That made me jealous. It was so great to have the governor there

because at one point I turned to Arnold, you know, the real Arnold, and I said, governor, be honest with us. I need you to tell me the truth. What's going to happen when we do? die. Now, most people, if you said that, would say, how the heck would I know? I don't know. He goes, well, it's going to happen to you.

You're going to lay there dead, and nothing is going to be there. There's going to be no heaven. There's not going to be anything. You're just going to lay there and rot. And I said, that is a fantastic answer. Howard Stern. No, no, no. I got to. Really? What are you going to go do? I got to do the panel. You're going to talk to these people.

Who do you have on the panel? You want me to stay on you're on the panel. I know, you gotta You gotta get back to the pool. All right, take you somewhere. Come here, come here, you. I love you, I love you too. Howard Stern.

All right, let's meet our panel. All right. Follow that. All right, he's the publisher of the web magazine, the Federalist and host of Sirius XM's The Fray, Ben Dominich. Ben, how you doing? She's the Washington, D.C. Bureau Chief of Vice News,

Shona Thomas. And he's co-host of showtime. Times the Circus. I'm MSNBC's analyst and co-founder and editor of the recount.com. John Heilman. Okay. No overtime tonight. I've got to get to Vegas, The Mirage. If you're watching Friday Night Live, I'll be there in three hours.

All right. So let's get right to the issues. Bapa Bow, Bui. No, no. We've got to move on to the next. Just saying, Papa Booy. Okay, I understand. So Mitch McConnell on social media.

I add, he said, the way that impeachment stops is with a Senate majority with me as majority leader. Sounds like he's saying it doesn't really matter what Donald Trump did or does. I will stop it. My first question is, do Republicans still believe

in democracy? Well, I would say they would say they do. But impeachment can't really stop with Senator McConnell. Impeachment is a House of Representatives process. And the thing is, it's Nancy Pelosi in charge of that process. And I think we all sort of know that

it's pretty obvious they're moving towards impeachment. Now, when it comes to actually removing him from office... But I mean, democracy, in the sense that, you know, when the Benghazi hearings were going on, I mean, Democrats thought they were very unfair and they were being nasty, but they still showed up. Because when you get a

subpoena, you showed up. Now we're in this phase of government by make me. I'm just not doing it. That to me seems like they don't believe in democracy anymore. Well, first off, you can impeach for anything. You can impeach him because you don't like his hair.

The Republicans could have impeached Barack Obama for wearing a tan suit. It's a political decision. It's not a legal decision. And it's up to the Congress to decide. The only question I have is why they aren't doing it faster. Because, from my perspective, the real risk that Democrats run at this point is having this process drift into

an election year in which they want to make this about a lot more than impeachment. They want to make it about the economy. They want to make it about health care, they want to make it about a bunch of other issues. But if we end up in a situation where Mitch McConnell is getting this on his desk in late December, early January, then it drifts into when all of these senators who are going to have to be part of these hearings. But wouldn't, I mean, you say it could be out on the trail. Here's the thing, it's not right. You can't impeach someone because of their color of their hair because there's no reasonable

legal theory under which the color of someone's hair could constitute a high crime and a misdemeanor. No, you can. The president. And in fact, the original impeachments were done primarily targeting judges who were drunk. Yes, and the reality is that that's never going to happen. What's going to happen is the President of the United States who called the head of a foreign country and said, I know you guys are in a hot war with Russia, and I know you need this military assistance.

Happy to give it to you, but you've got to do me a favor first. You've got to work with my crooked attorney and his friends, Leav and Igor, and you've got to dig up some dirt on my principal political opponent, and then I'll give you the money. And then he came and said, here's a transcript that's perfect, and is going to prove that I'm completely,

innocent when in fact it proved he's completely guilty. If that is not an impeachable offense, give it the fuck up. There is no impeachment. If you can't impeach the president, if you can't impeach the president for this, if you can't impeach the president for this, we should get rid of impeachment out of the Constitution because this is what the impeachment clause was written for. Well, I also think, I mean, one, we're not going to get rid of the impeachment clause in the Constitution. That would take far too much work in too many states. But two, from what Ben was saying, you know, when Senator McConnell, he can drag that out himself, actually. Like, I understand this argument about, you know,

the House of Representatives shouldn't wait that long. They should do this really quickly. But because it is a political thing, and I agree with you that it is a political act, impeachment is. It's not exactly a legal act. They have to convince more than just this audience. They have to convince more Americans

that this is a legitimate thing that they are doing. And that's going to take a little bit of time, if they can do it. But come on, how many times would there Honestly, would the Republicans have impeached Hillary Clinton if she did anything? For this? For anything. Say Hillary Clinton had an extra marital affair with a porn star named Daniel Stormy.

And then, you know, the campaign funds were used to just make sure that that dirt didn't come out. I mean, wouldn't that be... She was an unindicted co-conspirator in the case. What if Chelsea Clinton met with five Russians in a hotel to get dirt? and exchange polling data. I mean, I could go on. There's 20 things that they would have impeached her for already.

In a heartbeat. And we play this game throughout the administration where we say Trump does something. If Barack Obama had done that, what would have happened? He would have been impeached nine times over. I just think the notion

that they're not moving fast enough. This story broke three weeks ago. The whistleblower came forward, right? They're going to be done with this. Nancy Pelosi is going to have impeached the President of the United States by Christmas. And if that happens...

And they'd like to do it before Christmas. It's going to have taken three months. We're going to have gone from September to December at the latest. As Shauna said, it could be Thanksgiving. And he's almost certain to get impeached. The question is how much more we learn in this period over the course of October, November, and maybe December, and what that effect is on the Senate as they come to have a trial of this matter.

But I still think that's pretty quick. It's not like this is not the Mueller investigation that's taken a year and a half. This thing's going to have moved from start to finish in three months. How will this serious story, where he abandoned the current? How will that affect impeachment? I'm just wondering if it's a one-two punch. Well, people, if anyone, because the Republicans themselves do not like it. I mean, look, if you're a fan of Trump and you don't know who the Kurds are,

but if you have even a vague idea and you know they've been our allies, we fucked them over once under another Republican president, so they should get used to it. But now we did it again. They're the ones who were fighting ISIS with us and for us, and he abandons them and lets them be, slaughtered again, which is going on right now. I just wonder what

that does. Is that something that just says to some people, yeah, this other stuff was bad and God, he just can't be trusted with anything. Nothing unites Washington more than getting involved in military missions in the Middle East. And so in this circumstance,

I think you had a unified Washington pushing back against the president. Of course, we know today from the shelling that's going on that was near American forces. But it's not getting involved. It's getting uninvolved. Well, but that's what I'm saying. Washington disagrees with the president every time he pulls back from any scenario like this,

which means it creates cracks in the base of support that he has. In addition to that, it creates cracks among evangelicals and Christians in America who tend to like the Kurds because of their Christian population. But the outcome of that, I think, is really too early to adjudicate, especially because, you know, in this determination that the president made, we are going to end up in the midst of a war that involves multiple factors that is very complicated and that doesn't have a clear interest on the part of Americans. I'm not sure how it's going to play out in the country, but in Washington, it makes him a lot less popular with hawkish Republicans. But here's what happened this week. What happened this week was something we've never seen before.

Wait, wait, I'm sorry, it makes him popular with less popular. Less popular. Less popular. Yes. We saw the court with the earth this week. You saw Lindsay Graham, a bunch of Republican senators, Matt Drudge, Fox News, every Republican in the world, Eric Erickson, all command. and attacking Trump for the first time ever in the course of his presidency over this issue. You know, these are a bunch of people who have, especially in the Republicans in the Senate, who are looking down at this impeachment thing coming towards them and seeing,

we're going to have a giant shit sandwich on our plate. How big is that sandwich? How bad is that sandwich? How much shit is on that sandwich? And they're pissed about it. And they're pissed about it, and they all want to attack Trump for putting them in that position.

But if they attack him for that, they're on the side of the Democrats. So instead, they have found this route, this thing, the abandonment of the Kurds, gives them a way to vent their frustrations at Trump and attack him without being on the side of the Democrats. They can be on the sides of the Kurds, who, by the way, if you're a Trump fan,

you can't even spell Kurd. I'm not going to agree with that, necessarily, but I do think it does, in some ways, could show Republicans that they do have some power in the situation. The political problem here for a lot of Republicans is they are worried about getting reelected, and they are worried about the power of President Trump's words.

And when he comes out and tweets about, something or said something that they are going to lose their election because of that. But this actually, with the Marco Rubio's of the world and the Mitch McConnell's of the world, actually, and everyone else, they pushed back and he started to try to kind of backtrack. He realized he had walked into something that his, I don't know about his base, but his base in Washington, D.C. didn't like. I think that is actually instructive. I also think you have a point. One of your points is that it brings everything is going to come into the impeachment argument now. Right.

Like the moment I saw the Syria and the Kurds stuff, I was just like, oh, we're now going to wonder, is he fit to make these kind of decisions, which is going to come into that impeachment argument? It's not going to be an article of impeachment. We're not going to see Nancy Pelosi put an article on the floor that says he, you know, screwed over the Kurds. But it does make people start to have this conversation about his ability to make those decisions. I would be a lot more receptive to the critiques that I was. hearing if they weren't in mass from people who supported a dumb war based on bad intelligence that led to the loss of hundreds of thousands of lives. You're talking about the Iraq war? These were all the most hawkish pro-Iraq people, and I think that they should all

have a little thing on their Chiron underneath that just reminds people when you see them in mass on any network, there is no one on this panel who opposed the war, okay? That's what should be on all of this, because I hear this, I hear this drum again and again, and we never learn from the mistakes of the past. But we are still in those situations. We are in those areas. We can't just extract ourselves. Okay, first of all, some people were against the war.

Yeah, yeah. Like Obama. Yeah. Okay. Some people said, I'm not against all wars. I'm against dumb wars, right? Yeah. Okay.

There's also two Iraq wars. Yeah. I don't know which one you're talking about. You could be talking about either one of them. But in the first one, it was George Bush the first, who promised the Kurds help and then let them die under Saddam Hussein's poison gas. Yes. Okay.

But here's... The opposing regime change... It's a good thing to have. Here's the political thing, right? If you were in the unlikely position of being Donald Trump's main political advisor and you were looking at the situation unfolding, the first thing you would say to him is like,

look, you're going to get impeached in the House, but as long as you keep Republicans in the Senate, you're fine. Don't do anything to piss those guys off. So what does Trump do? He gets on the phone with Erdogan. It's Putin's birthday. Erdogan asked him for something.

He's like, it's Vladimir's birthday. And I want to build a tower in Istanbul. And he's like not thinking about that this going to be going to be. to piss off every Republican in the Senate. He just does the deal because he's all impulse. I used to think it was the TV that was our big enemy with Trump. I think it's the phone.

It's the phone. It's both. He's a 14-year-old teenage girl in the 60s. It's the phone and the TV. He's on his princess phone talking to other crusty old guys who were... Quisting his hair. Yes, I mean, you know, today he was talking about how, well, I think we made the deal with China. How many times have we made the same deal with China?

It's like when we used to kill the number two in Al-Qaeda, like every week. And I think, you know, he says it. The stock market goes up. Yeah. But also, how come every zany thing he does seems to be exactly the thing that Putin would like? I mean, ISIS, I mean, the Kurds who fought ISIS are our ally, and Turkey is our ally in NATO.

Now, in the past, an American president would always say to our allies, I know you guys have differences, but we're on the same team. This guy starts a war between them. The Obama administration actually did that. Part of the reason why those forces are there was to sort of keep everybody in line for as long as possible. I also think it's very weird that we are in a situation where he pulls back those troops

and then realizes he may have made a mistake and then decides to do the same thing that we've always been doing, which is trying to negotiate between the Kurds and the Turkish. It reminded me of the Iran nuclear deal in the same. some ways in that he pulled back on this thing, which he ran on and campaigned on, and I understand that. And then he, and then the Iranians started enriching, you know, uranium again. Sure, of course. Why wouldn't that? And everyone's like, wait, but we already knew that what would happen. It's, it's, it's, it's, it just, it's a cycle of the deal and then gets mad at them. Yes. Yeah.

For doing the things that were in the deal. Okay, so, um, he said about Fox News this week, they're not delivering for us like they're grub not delivering for us again the narcissism to just say that out loud to voice that interior monologue is an amazing sickness

I mean I could see him thinking that but you wouldn't say that but he sends his attorney general yeah the attorney general of America to talk to Rupert Murdoch the head of Fox News and the next day Shepard Smith is gone

The big critic on Fox News. The only, the straight news man, let's put it that way. They have a straight news guy. They're a little bit of a civil war there at Fox News. Just people, not the prime time people are ass-lickers. But guys like this. I mean, no? Sean Hannity?

I don't think that you can say that about Brett Barre. I think that's very much. I said Sean, I said the primetime people. I guess I think of primetime differently being from the East Coast. I think we put Brett Bear in a different category. You're right. Brett Bear, right. on the other side of it a little bit, you know,

that could be a... Straight news guy. Right. Straight news guy. The prime time people are... But I read this week that four in ten Republicans think that Trump did not mention Biden in the Ukraine call, even though Trump himself admits it. Yes. Well, but the call was perfect. That's why.

The call was perfect. Because the call was perfect. Because they're watching Fox News and they're watching those ass-lickers you're talking about and they're hearing a totally different version of reality that spun out every single night on that. network and the reality is the thing that I would be freaking out if I was Trump. It's not just that they're not delivering for him. It was the Fox News poll this week that said 51% of the people in the country are now for not just impeachment but removal. That's what was a Fox News

poll. Right. That's the made of mad. And when the aforementioned Brett Baer went on the air that night and put that thing up big, that was the thing that caused Trump to lose his shit. It was like, you're not just not delivering for me, you're shove it in my face. All right. Thank you, panel. I am now going to bring out the senior senator from the great state of Minnesota and a 2020 Democratic presidential candidate. Please welcome Amy Clovershire.

So great to see you. Thanks for having me. Thank you. Okay, so Trump was in Minnesota. That's right. He says he can win it. That is the state that they are... That's wrong.

That's wrong? Yeah. Well, that's the one they think they can flip. Well, that is not going to happen as long as I'm leading the ticket. And one of the reasons that I think we need to bring more people in is because we've got to win not just Minnesota, which was close last time in his race, but then I came storming back in 2018

and won every Republican congressional district. And what we need to do is to extend that out to Wisconsin and Michigan and Pennsylvania. I just went to all of those states, met with carpenters, met with dock workers, people who he had made promises to that have been left behind by President Trump. And so what I want to do is build a blue wall around those states.

Oh, I heard that term last time. It didn't work out so long. I'm going to make him pay for it. Well, I think you probably could. I hope you can. Do you think the Democrats, though, are too into identity politics? I mean, a lot of people in the middle of the country, which you represent so well, they see that D next to someone's name, and it's just something they can't get behind. Why is that? Why is that D so toxic?

Well, first of all, it's not toxic to everyone. And we have a real fired-up base right now, and that is going to be so important. People who have felt hurt by this guy, hurt by his rhetoric, wake up in the morning, seeing him go after their entire city and call him. falling at rat infested, those things have happened. But when you get to the middle of the country, his trade war has hurt a bunch of our farmers. They've got soybeans mounting up in bins. His rhetoric is not what people want to have. Their kids listen to, and they have to turn down the TV

every single time he goes on TV. I remember the days when if you didn't agree with the president or maybe you didn't even vote for them, you'd be proud to say, this is my nation, and this is my leader. That's not true with this president. When you look at what he has done, So to me, this is about economics and not standing up like I would and taking on the pharmaceutical industry

and not doing anything when it comes to training people and making sure they're ready for the jobs of tomorrow and immigration reform. It's about all those things, but it's also about values. We believe in America. And he has put patriotism behind his own interests. That's what those calls were to the head of Ukraine and the cult. to the president of China when he's looking for dirt on an opponent. He's putting his own political interests, his own partisan interests, his own business interests in front of America.

And that's why I see a different kind of election. I see a fired-up Democratic base, and with someone like me leading the ticket, where you can bring in independence, and you can bring in moderate Republicans, and you can win big, not just win, and then you can govern in a different way. Because this guy has divided people,

in a way that we have not seen in this country. So what do you see as your path to the nomination? Well, my path, first of all, starts with a show because they say I haven't had a viral moment, so going on the same night as Howard Stern out here and really start a viral moment. Going on the same moment.

Howard, we need a viral moment. Right now. What could go wrong? No. But, no, seriously. And that's what these debates have been. and I have been on a steady course. I think Americans don't want the loudest voice in the room anymore. They got that in the White House.

I think they want someone that is tired of the noise and nonsense and want to get things done. Right. I don't know if those moments are so great. I mean, Kamala Harris had moments, and she's not doing too good. You know, you're right. Moments don't make... Yeah, and I think that moments work when they actually happen,

that people don't manufacture them. For me in the Kavanaugh hearing, I didn't exactly predict that the nominee was going to ask me if I blacked out. But I had a moment where I had to respond in that moment. Right, I remember that. Yes, and I did. Because he likes beer. Right. And he was asking if you like beer just as much.

Exactly. And I showed some grace under pressure. And I think that's really important in a precedent. So for me, it is, of course, going to those states, I don't have as much money as a number of my opponents, but I have enough money to win. We're doing this the right way, the grassroots way, and building up endorsements and support. And that's how you win an election in America. Yeah, I mean, obviously, this is a fight between two wings of the party,

which is almost every election. There is a center in the Democrat, a center-left wing. You're plenty liberal. You're plenty progressive. And then there's a far-left, which I think would be represented by Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren. Okay. Yeah, okay.

We all like them, too. Are they two left? Is Elizabeth Warren too far left to get elected in a general election? Again, I want to win big, and if someone is looking to kick 149 million Americans off their current health insurance in four years, then I'm not your candidate. If you want to use a bunch of hardworking people's money to send rich people's kids to college for free, then I'm not. not your candidate. And just because people say ideas are bold, doesn't mean they're bold. They may be bad. And so my bold ideas are this. Make it easier for kids to afford to go to college, but don't forget that there are many paths to success. And that right now we have a huge

need in our country for jobs that require one and two-year degrees. And we should not leave those people behind. Remembering that we need to take on farmer prices, a public option, take on climate change in a big way, something that this president has just gone backwards on, work with the rest of the world, not leave our allies behind, don't coddle dictators. And when I was listening to the panel before, I was not in Washington, but I was not for the Iraq war, but I would never leave those Kurds left for slaughter like this guy has done. That is not what America does. That's not what you do. You honor your commitment. You keep, you make your promises and your threats, and you keep them. and this is the whole world is watching right now.

So I think to get back to the center-left argument, I think you're probably more in the, again, center-left, not far-left, and that's going to come down to one candidate from each. Now, right now it's Joe Biden, who is the leader of the center-left part. One applaud. And I've always said, I like Joe.

He's never my favorite. But if he's the guy to beat Trump, I was like, let's not kill him. If he's the one, but I must say my confidence that he can beat Trump is waning. He looks like a depreciating stock to me. And I've always said that also we're talking about age with Howard. I've always fought against ageism because it's a judgmental thing that, you know, very few, you can do that about very few other things in America anymore.

It's a case-by-case basis. Elizabeth Warren is 70. She looks 50 and acts 20. She took selfies with 4,000 people. I don't even know if I trust someone who wants to be president that much. Joe, I don't know. And Bernie, you know, just had a heart attack. I think, you know, I'm not trying to get Joe out,

but we do need someone in the center who, say, younger and femaleer. Is that? Honestly, you know, I... Right. So my case is this. I have won every single race, every single time, all the way back to elementary school, where I have...

These guys always say they've won everything. So when my slogan I've discarded was all the way with Amy Kay. Yeah, that's not good. Is that true? So... And I've done that... What was the upshot of that? What happened?

By going not just where it's comfortable, but where it's uncomfortable. Right. By bringing people with me, by reaching out to people, by unifying them and seeing that common ground. And that's how I've gotten things down in Washington as well. I think you could be the dark course,

because, you know, it is going to come down to that battle. And maybe they're at loggerheads. This has happened at conventions before, and they have to find somebody who's a compromise. And, you know, you're a woman, let's face it. Yes, I am. But that's just important in today's politics. If you're a white man...

Well, a lot of women won. hard racist. Laura Kelly, new governor of Kansas, right? Right. And you saw that but I'm saying it's a lot easier to be on the center side of things, as Obama was, if you are not a white man. If you're a white straight man, it's like,

you know, then you're suspect a bit, but a woman can pull it off. I want to make it clear, and I am excited to be one of several women in this race. Which is just unheard of in our politics. But I'm not just running on that. No, I am

Absolutely. Right, and we can get to that, and then you lose a lot of people. Right. I remember being up in northern Minnesota with our steelworkers, and they would always, I finally would say, you know what, I'm not running as a woman. I'm running on my record, and if I would just run as a woman, I wouldn't win, because they would be like this. I said, because half the voters are men.

And they go, yeah, that's exactly right. So I think what that is about is running on your ideas, running on your mom. merit, running on turning ideas into action and having people's back. Instead of just going to the extremes all the time in our politics. We have that right now. And I just see a better future for our country. I think your moment is to come. All right. Thank you, Senator.

Amy Klobuchar, everybody. All right, it's time for new rules back over here, right? Okay. Okay, hello again. New rules. Someone has to ask all these self-righteous people tweeting, I stand with Hong Kong against China. Do you know where that phone was made?

Because it wasn't in Santa's workshop. It was in the people's revolutionary phone factory. If you're serious about this, you're going to have to tweet with a phone made here in America. New rule, now that Facebook has developed an AI program that can see people's outfits and photos and suggest changes that would make them more stylish, okay, great, but you first.

New rule, don't feel bad that renowned director Martin Scorsese says Marvel superhero movies are not cinema. He obviously hasn't seen Ant Man and the Wasp. Actually, Scorsese's right. Superhero movies are all the same. Whereas his new film, The Irishman, is a mob movie starring Joe Pesci and De Niro.

You got it. Thank you. New Rule, the Philadelphia Man, awarded $8 billion from Johnson and Johnson for a drug. he took as a child that made him grow breasts. Must admit that when he heard $8 billion, his nipples got hard.

New Rule, someone has to ask the fire department at Tennessee's Rock Haven Lodge, Nudest Park, how they keep volunteers. Boy, you think you have a bad view where you work. Try being the second firefighter up the ladder at an all-nude fire company. And finally, new rule, someone has to tell me how it is

that for most consumer products, there's such stiff competition that a common sales pitch is if you find this item at a lower price, come on in and we'll beat it. But a knee replacement can cost $17,000 in one hospital and $61,000 in another in the same city. With most products, you as the consumer get lucky and there's no possible way to gouge you like that.

And that's when you hear... Since even if it's been anyone's advertised price, so your mattress is free! That's how capitalism is supposed to work. work. A weirdo in a bad suit pledging he'll kill his whole family before he's under soul. But that doesn't apply to the big

ticket items like the Pentagon and hospitals and infrastructure where everyone gets to wet their beak before anything gets done and that's why nothing ever does get done. Why can't we help the homeless? If you look around this city lately you probably are saying to yourself

either the homeless problem is getting worse or camping isn't what it used to be. You know, after World War II there was a huge housing shortage in L.A. when all the vets returned home and had nowhere to live. So the government found some empty space and in a matter of months built Quonset huts for

6,000 people, all for a total cost of what in today's dollars would be less than 18 million. Well, that was then. In the bond measure we passed in 2016 to build housing for the homeless, each unit was projected

to cost $140,000 which is more than the asking price for this four-bedroom Dutch colonial in Little Falls, New York. And now that we're actually building these apartments, the cost for each unit has risen to 531K. How is that possible, you may ask? Do they each come with a Lambo and a shark tank? Of course, they still make those Quonset huts,

and one today would cost about $8,000. But it's hard to skim money off $8,000. But $531,000, sure. About 40% of that cost goes to something the city calls soft costs, and I call bullshit costs. Layer upon layer of middlemen inspectors, contractors, lawyers, lobbyists, and, oh yes, labor unions too, and my favorite, consulting. Not of consulting going on in America these days.

Everyone seems to need consulting. Apparently nobody in America anymore knows what the fuck they're doing. So we need consultants to come in and be paid to tell you how to do the job you're supposed to do. Oh, and until the $531,000 apartments are built, we're putting special porta-potties near the homeless camps, which cost $320,000 each for porta-potties. That's some good shit. And California finally conceded it needed to scale back our big high-speed rail project

because it was costing $200 million a month. as opposed to France where building high-speed rail costs 13 million a mile. And it's not like France is cheap or doesn't have labor unions. France is nothing but labor unions. They have strikes like we have mass shootings. But what they don't have is this level of systematic graft and greed. Now, Donald Trump certainly represents many of the ills our country has been living with for a long time, but perhaps none more than that America

is now scammerica. The money should say, in gouge we trust on it. A vial of insulin costs about $5 to produce and is sold for over 500. Why? For the same reason, it costs $8 to get Pringles out of the mini bar, because they can. Why if at one Philadelphia Clinic,

they can do a colonoscopy for a grand? Does another one in the same city charge $4,000? because the price comes out of their ass. There is a breaking point in an economy when the scam parasites kill the host, and we're coming up to that point. So before we finish rooting out corruption in Ukraine, how about we take a swing at it here in America?

All right, that's our show. You're watching this live Friday night. It'll be at the Mirage in two hours. And again, tomorrow night, and MSNM-Med Square Garden, that is, in New York, November 9th. I want to thank my guest, Ben Dominic, Short of Thomas, John Heilman, Amy Klobuchar, and Howard Stern.

Thank you, folks. No, no overtime. Catch all new episodes of Real Time with Bill Maher every Friday night at 10, or watch them anytime on HBO On Demand. For more information, log on to HBO.com.