Real Time with Bill Maher - Ep. #727: Gov. Wes Moore, Chris Cuomo, Sarah Isgur
Episode Date: April 25, 2026Bill’s guests are Gov. Wes Moore, Chris Cuomo, Sarah Isgur (Originally aired 4/24/26) Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices...
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Welcome to an HBO podcast.
from the HBO late-night series, Real Time with Bill Ma.
You're happy today.
Because Trump said today we will not be using nuclear weapons in Iran.
I didn't know that was on the table, but okay.
Oh, this Iran way.
It's gotten a little groundhog day, isn't it?
It's always kind of the same story every week.
We're seizing their boats.
They're seizing our boats.
It's less like a war and more like a Florida divorce.
It's kind of become a war of,
You block me? No, I block you.
Straight to Hermos, you think you can fuck it up?
Or we could fuck it up.
That's our plan now, is to win slowly by destroying their economy.
Hopefully their economy.
Yeah, it was Earth Day this week, but we found out we still use a lot of oil.
Nobody could afford gas.
This week, Tiger Woods crashed his bicycle.
Wow.
That is a Eric Swalwell.
has been turning off the engine of the car when he gets blown.
Now, he just, really, he's still some residual affection for Eric Swall.
Well, wow.
Okay.
But, you know, it's not just gas.
You know, it turns out everything is made of petroleum products.
Did you see this week?
Condoms?
Who knew condoms?
Condoms.
Yes.
They're getting trapped in the straight o'harmoos.
So, condoms are now very scarce and very expensive.
More bad news from Mike Vrable.
The condom situation is so serious
that we are changing the name
from Operation Epic Fury to the Trojan War.
And yet, lately, Trump on the war has been so chill.
Have you noticed that?
I know, it's not like him to veer radically.
But, you know, a couple of weeks ago,
it was if you don't do what you say,
today, I'm going to destroy your civilization,
bomb the shit out of you.
You think your pencils and dolls are expensive.
Whoa, you...
Oh, and now.
And now it's like, is it really a war?
It's more of a situation, really, I think.
And the problem is he keeps saying we won, and we didn't.
We didn't.
Hormuz is not open.
The people did not do an uprising.
The regime is still in place.
We did not win.
Sorry.
And in social media, he keeps rubbing their noses in the victory we don't have.
Every day, he treats it.
stuff that's inflammatory and contradictory, all these bullshit claims.
I got to say, you can say what you want about his negotiating tactics.
One tactic you can't get them on is the silent treatment.
Turns out the one thing we are really good at is killing their leaders who are too stupid
to go underground when we're trying to kill them.
That's what we're going.
The current Ayatollah, who's the son of the old Ayatollah, turns out he's very gravely wounded.
he was badly burned, can hardly speak.
When he sentences people to death now,
he used to do it with a look.
Very sad.
Oh, and in the middle of this war,
here's big news, Pete Hegseth fired a white guy.
Yeah, the Secretary of the Navy.
And, wow, this guy must have done some bad shit,
that doesn't happen a lot with Pete Higgseth.
But it was either a war crime
or knowing that administration,
there was a picture of him with huge fake balloon tits.
It's one of the two.
There's a lot of talk this week about drinking in the Trump administration,
which is ironic because Trump is a complete teetotaler,
but, you know, Pete Heggseth, there was some rumors about him.
Head of the FBI, Cash Patel.
He is suing the Atlantic.
He denies it, but they wrote an article saying he drinks too much.
The Labor Secretary this week resigned
among allegations that she drinks too much on the job,
that she had an affair with her security guy,
and was, you know, going on trips,
and I think it's true that she might be a bit of a party girl.
Well, because she once said,
as Labor Secretary, my first priority is to improve twerking conditions.
That's an indication I think.
And here's
exciting news. The Michael Jackson movie opens today.
Showings are 7, 9, and 11.
Just like the victims.
All right, we've got a great show.
We have Sarah Isger and Chris Cuomo are here.
But first up, he is a bestselling author
and a U.S. Army veteran.
And he currently serves as the 63rd governor of Maryland,
Governor West Moore.
Good to see you again.
See you again.
Look at you're loved here in California.
It's nice out here.
You're in California.
You're on real time.
You must be running for president.
No?
It's so funny because, you know, the GOP is like historically unpopular now.
And yet every week I have people on this show, Josh Sapiro, Alyssa Slotkin.
You know, you.
Kevin Newsom is here next week.
Andy Bischert. No one's running. It's running. You'd think it would be a great opportunity.
No one wants. Maybe I should do it because no one wants to do it. I don't understand.
Well, no. Listen. I've always said, you know, everybody can do what they want.
But my thing is this, is that my state is under assault right now. You know, I've had over 31,000 people fired in the past year by Donald Trump and J.D. Vance.
Federal workers. And-
That's because a lot of federal workers live in Maryland.
Because a lot of them live in Maryland.
The federal government is there.
People who have the audacity of doing things like making sure our food is safe, or making sure that our planes are not colliding, or giving veterans like myself, making sure they can get the medication that they need.
And those are the people who Donald Trump and J.D. Vance went out to first.
So my point is this.
You know, our battle is now.
Our battle is now.
Well, I mean, I do think the midterms are going to be a blowout.
I think the Democrats are going to just clean up.
I mean, I guess the question is, how do you think they're going to blow it?
I don't think they can vote.
I'm not worried about that.
But my point is, what does that mean?
Right?
I mean, like, listen, I think it's very important
that the Democrats can win Congress,
but what then are we going to do?
Because we have to be very clear.
And I take this from a very personal perspective
where, I mean, I don't come from a political family.
You know, I come from a family, frankly,
who's used to suffering the consequences of policies
and not used to making them.
And when you ask many members of my family,
about bad policies that we've had to deal with my entire life,
they couldn't tell you if a Democrat was the author
or Republican was the author.
They just know it was just a stupid policy.
And so I just think that we need to make sure
that we have to be able to control what in many ways
is just a completely lawless federal administration right now.
However, however, our job just can't be to now we can push back.
We've actually got to figure out what does push forward actually look like.
what does it mean to actually create a society
that people can actually root for it?
What does it mean to make sure
that you can have child care
that people can afford
and making sure that people can get back
to the workforce without wondering
are my kids going to be okay?
What does it mean to make sure
that we can have safe streets
in our neighborhoods?
So like if the goal of all of this in November
is to say, yes, we can now, you know,
do subpoenas against the president,
then frankly, I think the American people
are going to look at us and say that's not enough.
What policies are you talking about?
You say that hurt you.
Yeah.
Which one? Bigazek, I mean, Obamacare, that helped. That didn't hurt, right?
Correct.
Okay. I mean, Medicare, Social Security, I mean, that's going back a ways, but the 1964 Civil Rights Act, the Voting Rights Act.
I mean, even the EPA, creation of the... I mean, these are policies the government created,
correct.
Mostly by Democrats, not all. What are you talking about?
So I'm talking about, like, for example, if you look at what we're doing inside of the state of Maryland,
it's just simply saying, are you going to do what you say you're going to do?
So, for example, in my state, when I said we are going to make sure we're going to invest in child care
because it is ridiculous issue of parents that are trying to figure out, can I go back to the workforce,
or can I make sure my kids are going to be okay?
And so that's why in Maryland, we've made the largest investments in child care scholarships in the United States of America, right,
to get people back to work.
When we said that we're going to invest in housing, because housing is too expensive all over this country and in the state of Maryland.
And I said, well, you know what?
the largest landowner in the state of Maryland? Guess what? It's the state of Maryland.
So I said, then you know what? We're going to take a look at all available state-owned land
and land that is near transit, near trains, near buses. I want to access to all that land,
and we are going to build affordable housing on that land to give our housing for you.
So this is about what are we doing to be able to push back to make sure we're going out to these
corporations and these supermarkets who are price-gouging people when they walk into supermarkets.
We made Maryland the first state in the country that now bans price gouging and price manipulation.
So when you go into a supermarket, they can't use your data against you when you go to the checkout counter.
So you'd rather do that than what they're doing in New York, which is city run.
I mean, that's what mayor, what, you?
I see you laugh.
Yeah, no, no, no.
And I say good, laugh.
Yeah.
Because that's ridiculous.
But that's what they're doing.
Yeah.
I mean, that's, and of course, you know, we find out now that the supermarkets that are around the areas where the city plans to put their supermarket are very pissed off because they're like, well, of course, how are we?
going to compete. But, you know, Mayor Mondami, that's extreme socialism. Some would say
communism. So you're not for that, because I feel like the Democratic Party has two wings now.
One would be Democratic Socialists. That's the term they use. Montami is one. Bernie Sanders.
I mean, there are several others. AOC. Right. And then there's what I would call Democratic Classic.
Which are you?
Well, I'm going to be very honest. I mean, like, when I, the Democratic Party didn't choose.
me, right? When I ran for governor, the Democratic Party put millions of dollars to try to stop me.
It just happened to people of Maryland had a different point of view. And the people of Maryland
made me the governor, but no party boss and no party made me the governor. And I like that
because there is no, I honestly believe if you just swallow a party ideology, you're probably
not thinking hard enough. And I don't care what party that you talk about. And, but what's
I want to do, but when I talk about what are the things that we've got to make sure we're focusing
on, you know, when it comes to, when it comes to us, I believe that oftentimes a Democratic
party is this, you know, we have to stop being the party of no and slow and start being the party
of yes and now, right? Start being the party that actually moves to address with the kind of urgency
that people are requesting. If I'm telling you that, listen, I, the school that my kids are
attending is not preparing them for college or career, I don't want to hear you tell me,
and that's why I'm going to do a six-year study on it.
You mentioned scholarships before, and I mean, this is something Democrats.
They are the party of education, that is their portfolio.
So they should either own it for good or bad.
Absolutely.
Okay.
But like in Pennsylvania, Governor Shapiro, not running for president.
He's eliminated the need for a degree, a college degree, to do.
I've done that too.
You have done that too.
Yeah.
Because, I mean, because, listen, we have eliminated this idea that somehow how we should be grading for our high schools is based on your four-year college.
acceptance rate because that's not the right, that's an indicator, but that's not something that
we should be looking at. So we've actually quadrupled the amount of slots in trade programs
and apprenticeship programs for our young people so that we believe in our four-year colleges
and we invest in them. But if someone doesn't want to go to a four-year college, we still need
to make sure they have a path for long-term economic success and economic mobility. And so
we have allowed these four-year colleges.
to be able to dominate this conversation
as if they are the end-all in be-all.
And frankly, I mean, I think Einstein, I think,
was the one who said it,
that if you tell a fish that the definition of a genius
is climbing a tree,
then that fish will always feel like it's insufficient.
We need to make sure that all of our young people
understand that there is a place for them
and there's a place for their long-term success
regardless of what academic pathway
that they chose to go down.
Okay, so, Governor Newsom,
him here. I think he's on our show next week. Also not running for president, completely not running for president.
He said if the Democrats want to win, again, they have to be what was more culturally normal.
How do you interpret that statement? And would you agree with that?
Listen, I don't, what I would say is this, is that the Democrats don't have a messaging problem.
We have a results problem.
There's a results problem when we are turning around and not producing the kind of results with the kind of speed that is necessary and required.
And you know who exploited that beautifully?
Donald Trump.
Because Donald Trump was a fantastic vessel for the frustration, right?
He points things out like nobody else's business.
He's just not a vehicle for the solution.
Donald Trump was the one who was pointing out, you know what?
We've done all this work around electric vehicles and all this kind of thing and passed a big bill around it.
And do you know how many electric charging stations we had by December of 2024?
37.
He pointed that out.
He pointed out the fact that we are now still watching inflation continue to rise.
Now, he's done nothing but watch inflation rise under him as well.
But again, he was a fantastic vessel for the frustration.
I have an honest belief.
And I think about it again with my own family.
I joined the Army when I was 17 years old.
And there's a philosophy we turned that we learned when I was 17.
leave no one behind. I think if the Democratic Party can continue to embrace this idea of leave no one behind
and making sure we can move with a speed and urgency that people don't feel like they're being left behind,
then we're not going to have an electoral problem again, and you've actually just fixed your messaging problem
by actually addressing with real results.
But don't you think the Democrats have a problem with their primaries? I mean, everybody does,
because it only encourages the far extreme wing of the party. That's true of the Republicans, true.
I mean, if you were to run for president, I'm not saying you are, of course.
But you would have to get through the primary process.
Now, we talked about this when we had lunch at my friends.
I said, I think you're a great one to do it in the Democratic Party because you wear the magic armor.
It's just the truth that a black candidate can say things and has permission to be more centrist in the Democratic Party than a white candidate.
Would you agree with that?
I think that the closed primary process has run its course.
You know, because I think the problem is,
the fastest growing political party in this country right now is independence.
It's people who are saying, I do not affiliate with Democrats
and I do not affiliate Republicans.
Here's the problem.
Independence cannot vote until November.
Their voice cannot be heard.
And when you're looking at the mass of gerrymandering that's taking place,
for example, in the Congress,
where over 92% of these congressional districts,
they're even, 92% are not competitive.
By November, it doesn't matter.
And so if that's the system that we have,
you have a system where more and more people are disenfranchised,
more and more people are taken out of the process.
And so I think the whole idea of a closed primary system
is one that has to be re-evaluated
because if you believe in democracy,
then let people's voices be heard
and don't make them have to affiliate to the political party.
All right, well, you're good at this.
I never got you down.
You never got me done, Ray.
Governor Westmore, I'll see you after the show.
And you're coming back for overtime, Grace.
I'll see you again.
All right.
Thank you.
Let's meet our panel.
Wouldn't get him down.
All right.
He hosts the Chris Cuomo Project podcast on the fastest growing cable news show, Quomo on News Nation.
Chris Cuomo is here with us.
Okay, she is the editor of the dispatcher's SCOTUS blog,
whose new book is called Last Branch Standing.
Sarah Isgar.
Sarah, great to have you back.
Okay.
Let's take a break from the war this week, shall we?
It does seem to be just Groundhog Day.
So this is the big story today.
The Justice Department is dropping its criminal investigation
of Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell.
Now, this gets to something I want to ask you about
because you have this theory that, you know,
we're actually blocking Trump more than people say.
And I've read that too.
Now, the Fed, chair, the Fed is...
Is that monetary policy or fiscal policy?
Right?
One of them is...
Okay, we're all stumped on that.
I was just letting you go.
It's monetary policy.
Monetary. Okay, there are two different things, but it's important.
And these are one of those norms we never used to fuck with,
but of course, Trump fucks with every norm.
So, and Jerome Powell, he's the chairman of the Fed,
and he did not do what Trump wanted,
and Trump has one speed when you defy him publicly, at least,
which is, I'm going to kill you.
So he went after...
He went after Jerome Pell.
You know what for?
Redecorating.
I'm not joking.
They were building a new headquarters,
and there were cost overruns,
like Trump would not know about cost overruns in building.
So he had his attack dog, Janine Piro,
the U.S. attorney there now go after him.
The judge said essentially zero evidence in this case.
But it does bring up this point.
You know, is Trump being blocked more?
I mean, you say it's the Supreme Court is doing it, right?
Yeah, legally, he's being blocked at.
every turn. The Supreme Court has blocked him on alien enemies for immigration. They blocked
him on federalizing the National Guard in Chicago. They blocked him on tariffs. They're definitely
going to block him on birthright citizenship. The reason that Lisa Cook... Is that going to...
Mail in voting is coming, although that at least is a statutory question for Congress in theory.
The question of whether someone can apply for asylum at the southern border, though, that's an executive
action. Lisa Cook is still a governor on the Federal Reserve because the Supreme Court blocked
President Trump's ability to remove her.
But, and this is where I think you and I
might agree, the Supreme Court,
the lower courts can block Trump
every which way, all these indictments
against James Comey or law firms
or universities.
But there is a political cost.
There is still the fact
that then people are afraid of being sued.
People are afraid of being indicted and it changes
their behavior. So he may lose
legally and still win
politically, culturally, normatively.
That's not good.
No, he...
Yeah.
Yeah, I know this personally.
I mean, a lot of us in the media do.
The club you never wanted to join.
Is the what's it like to be targeted by the president of the United States?
Oh, yeah. It's okay.
I don't know. It's kind of a fun job, dude.
I'd rather be engaged than just not engaged at all.
I think as long as he...
Because he has said once, and I think he's right about these.
He said, what people don't get about me is I have not.
permanent enemies. Like one day you're out, next day you're in, next day it's like it never
happened. I'd rather have it that way and talk to them and keep the dialogue going because,
you know, I've said many times, I think we need more people like me talking to him.
You know, you can hyperventilate all you want about what he does is wrong. I agree.
It should not be a government by people of saying. He should be home reading the briefing books
like Obama did. But that's not going to happen. It is a government by people are saying,
be one of the people saying. I would just, like, yes, I'm glad you're talking to you.
I agree with your point. Although, the problem is, when you have a president who is talking to
someone like you, he's also talking to Laura Lumer. And if I have to pick, I'd rather take both
of you off the map.
You're ever being compared to her. Why me? Why would you take me off the map? Not me, Bill.
I wouldn't take you off. What about me should be compared to Laura Lumer?
I'm saying we get the same ones
and we get the in.
You lost them with the loomer.
Yeah, it really lost me there.
It's all right.
You'll be back.
You'll be back.
You'll be back in.
I've been where you are right now.
It's a little cold, but it'll get better.
So what is the scorecard on backing drum?
Because a lot of people would say the Supreme Court
when they ruled that he had,
what was it complete immunity to do whatever he wanted?
What was the...
For a court constitutional...
Yes.
Absolute immunity for actions that relate to core or exclusive presidential powers.
That does seem sweeping, no?
Look, one, shameless plug.
Sarah's book is really good, the last branch standing,
about what the Supreme Court has supposed to be about.
They are in a jam now,
because the answer to your question about whether they're checking Trump more is they have to.
He is doing more absurd bullshit as president of the United States than we have ever
seen before. We have never had a president even think about, you know what I'm going to do?
Let me just sign this right now and change the Constitution. Nobody has ever been ignorant and
arrogant enough to try something like that, that I'm going to change birthright citizenship.
I don't think that's the way it works for us anymore. They have to check them. The problem is,
I feel bad for the people who voted for him because they were right to want to see the law fair stop.
they were right to want to see it stop.
You should not use your power to punish your political enemies.
And we saw way too much of it.
The problem is he's doing more of it than ever.
And for the DOJ, which, you know, Sarah was the voice of the DOJ.
Glad you're not right now, by the way, you know.
Me too.
They usually, if you hear, God forbid, they're looking at you, Bill,
you better call everybody you know because you've got problems.
But now they lose cases.
They have like a 97% conviction rate.
He's bringing it down.
Why? BS cases that are just political payback.
James Comey, that was embarrassing.
What they just did with Powell was embarrassing, and they're losing.
What they're doing with the Southern Poverty Law Center,
people really are going to believe that they created the KKK?
Okay, so we agreed that he is being blocked.
I always said the thing about him that was just the biggest thing for me,
he doesn't concede elections.
If you don't have elections, if you don't have the peaceful transfer of power,
you don't have the country.
Another time the court blocked him unanimously.
On what?
After 2020, right?
He appealed and appealed to try to every federalist society judge said no, and the Supreme
Court unanimity was like, get out of here.
Good.
But I mean, judge, I mean, he's very mad at his own justices now.
He said this week, certain Republican judges have gone weak, stupid, and bad.
He uses all the big words.
I gotta get him.
He knows all the words.
He knows all the words.
All the best words, he knows.
My five-year-old knows.
But, you know, I've always thought, I mean, look, justice is, whatever judge you are,
I mean, there's a whole big wall of law books behind you.
I don't think they really go to the idea of what is the actual law say?
They go by their gut.
They go by what they believe, and then they find a reason in one of those law books.
It's very much like the Bible.
You can find anything you want in the Bible.
And by the way, they're doing a Bible reading this week.
the whole country for our
205th anniversary, because we're a
Christian nation, not
really, but that's what they think.
They're all reading the Bible, like Trump is taking
a paragraph
or something, or whatever it is
in the Bible, a passage. In Texas, they're
putting the Ten Commandments back in schools?
The Ten Commandments are back in the school.
And the Fifth Circuit judge
in Texas said, this is okay?
Where are you on that?
Yeah, I clerked on the Fifth Circuit for the
judge who wrote that.
So look, this is actually another interesting part,
because have I got a book for you, Bill, to read?
I think you'll really like it about this.
Last Branch Standing Quest.
Thank you for asking that.
This narrative that the court is so conservative, right,
and it's just controlled by Trump,
the Ninth Circuit used to be the court that was overturned the most.
That was the Liberal Knight Circuit where we are now, California and the West.
That's not the court being overturned the most by the Supreme Court anymore.
It's the Fifth Circuit because of cases like this Ten Commandments case.
And if you really want to look at what the court is doing these days and why it is, you know, so much part of our conversation, why I can write a book about it, it's because Congress isn't doing anything anymore.
So what used to be, the Supreme Court would say yes or no, and then Congress could just pass a law the next day.
None of us believe that they will do that.
None of us believe that we have the power to amend the Constitution anymore.
So we keep looking to the Supreme Court to be the last word on things when, in fact, it was supposed to be part of this dialogue.
They're not politically accountable.
And so the pressure builds because we feel like we can't change it.
They don't answer to us.
They're not supposed to.
They're counter-majoritarian.
They're supposed to tell all of us to go buzz off,
like they did in Brown v. Board of Education
and West Virginia versus Barnett.
Their worst decisions are the ones where they went with the majority
in Dred Scott, in Plessy, in Kora Matsu.
Buck v. Bell's my favorite, the eugenesis case.
We don't all know those, just by the way.
I mean...
It's a reading list.
We get it.
We get it. You're the expert.
By the way, Laura Lumer sued me and I won this week.
Oh, man.
That's all right.
I was really talking for a way.
I'm not, no commentary.
That's just a fact.
Okay.
Let me go back to the Ten Commandments just a little bit,
because it seems such a clear case
that you shouldn't have the Ten Commandments in a school.
The school is just for learning.
It should be.
Now, obviously, the left has fucked that up, too.
I mean, there's lots of leftist indoctrination in schools.
So both sides play.
But this one seems very clear.
I'd also like to ask all the anti-Semites out there
who seem to populate both the left and the right,
who love the Ten Commandments so much.
Are you aware that this is a complete Jewy thing?
The Ten Commandments.
It's...
Well, it is.
I mean, it was written many, many years before Christ came along.
It's just Jews talking to Jews about Jews.
Chosen people conversation.
A chosen people conversation.
I think that you get it in the picture of the guy who's fighting to put them in the school
is a guy who has some of the ugliest allegations against him of immorality.
And what we don't want to do with all these people of faith in our society, which is great,
depending on how you use it, live the Ten Commandments.
Show us how you live.
Don't just say what you want us to think about you.
And for Paxton to say, yeah, I'm going to put it.
the Ten Commandments in, when he clearly only knows like two of them in terms of his own life,
what is the message for people?
Well, those kindergartners committing adultery, really. If they had it up there, maybe they
wouldn't do it. Yes. Coveting is a big word in lower school these days, you know,
covet, covet, the kids are crazy about it. All right, well, before we lose track of Trump,
I did want to congratulate Trump on one thing this week. He'd made it easier to smoke pot.
I got to say, we all of us, pot swelkers have been asking somebody.
to make marijuana less criminalized.
And hopefully, hemp.
He's got to help with hemp.
Hopefully he does.
Well, good luck trying to get high on hemp.
Some people use it for other things, but I take your point.
It's the only useful for other things.
It is a biological cousin of the stuff I smoke.
It is not something you can smoke.
It should never have been illegal in the first place.
Yeah.
Okay.
But it brings me to the bigger story that, you know, Trump is a teetotaler.
He really does not like liquor because I think he lost his breath out.
alcoholism. Okay. But it turns out that that administration does not follow the leader of the, the leader of the boss on this one.
I mean, this week we found out the big story, Cash Patel is suing the Atlantic because they wrote this story.
And he denies it, of course, but they say, you know, he's sometimes didn't show up at work because it's too much the night before.
And then there's, oh, there's that picture.
Yeah, I mean, we have, I mean, but you know what, that, that doesn't say anything.
I don't believe it just because the Atlantic said it.
It might be true, and so they got a picture of him with a bottle in his mouth.
We've all had a bottle in our mouth.
When we were babies.
You've never had a beer in your mouth, Chris?
Yeah, but I've never been...
So many people I don't drink.
Okay, but you don't have to worry about it.
And then he's literally downing the whole thing.
You take a break.
Okay.
But does that really...
See, this is just the...
Look, do I care if he drinks or not?
No.
Do I care that you put somebody who is selling conspiracy
about Epstein into the highest position of power to DOJ?
Yeah, that bothers me.
All right.
That bothers me.
All right.
So the point is, it is kind of a boozy administration
because I remember Janine Piro,
who's now the U.S. attorney.
I remember when she was on Fox News.
That was always the talk about her.
Again, I don't know if it's true or not.
And then there's the Labor Secretary.
She quit this week because apparently the same kind of rumors.
And, of course, there was always Pete Hegseth.
I mean, okay.
Now, those pictures are.
I would agree with. Okay. We don't know.
But we thought we, as a PSA,
because we're always trying to do service to this country,
we would want to put a little
guidelines to know if you are part of a
too boozy administration. Would you like to
see if you... These are just some of the
ways you can tell.
For example,
if among all your colleagues,
no one can remember who ordered the attack on
Venezuela.
If...
Cabinet meetings begin at 5 o'clock somewhere.
If RFK asked if you'd like to see a dead raccoon penis and you said yes.
If you got arrested because you were climbing on the ballroom construction equipment in the middle of the night.
Yes.
Definitely a sign.
Oh.
Here's one.
You keep slurring your ethnic slurs.
If everybody does a shot every time the Strait of Hormuz opens back,
back off.
That's kind of understandable
that one.
If when you tell a Senate panel, I don't recall,
you actually don't recall.
You appear on Face the Nation
with a dick drawn on your forehead.
Too boozy.
If you wake up on the couch
and Lindsey Graham is making waffles in a bathroom,
that is definitely
a sign.
I'm just
It's a public service, people.
And if everyone keeps asking,
do you think Hunter Biden left any more cocaine lying around?
Okay, so now let's talk about the big political bombshell that happened this week,
which was the state of Virginia.
They gerrymandered the fuck out of the state.
And I hate to sound like a five-year-old, but Trump started it.
He did.
I mean, now it's out of control, but that's just the fact.
He started it.
He encouraged Texas to do this where they jerry.
And I thought, like, I had Eric Holder on, like, not that many couple of years ago.
And it was like, we're going to fix gerrymandering.
We're going to stop it because, you know, gerrymandering is just not fair.
Both sides do it.
And then Trump just, of course, had to make it worse.
So now, Virginia, it looks like it's going to be only the suburbs.
We were talking to the governor, Maryland there, only his people, his constituents in that area.
Those are the suburbs around D.C.
That's part of Virginia, and they're all mostly, they do work in the government.
That's why so many government workers got fired.
So many people in Maryland got fired because the government workers.
They're going to gerrymandered the states with like almost all the votes are coming from there.
And the rest of the state's a big state full of Hicks.
And I say that in a not in a mean way.
Hicks are not to be stupid.
You're a Hick, okay.
I live in Virginia.
Yeah, but people rural people.
Oh, you do?
Yeah, one of that other part.
Which part do you live in?
I live right on the hick to Democrat line.
Okay.
But this is just a race to the bottom, is it not?
Because now, I mean, California has done it.
Illinois has done it.
Maryland has done it.
We're just going to get to...
It was like the last pillar of somewhat a resemblance of democracy
that we didn't fully do this.
And now we're just going to do it.
Every state is just rigged.
rigged.
Okay.
On the one hand, I think it's really funny to fight over which party should control a branch of government
that doesn't do anything anymore.
Like, why are we fighting over Congress?
What's the...
That's terrible.
That's a great take on that.
But okay, like, that's a fun, you know, tug-of-war team jersey thing to play.
Virginia used to have a bipartisan, non-partisan redistricting commission.
So we're actually getting worse.
But here's the good news.
In order to gerrymander this hard in all of these states, you actually do have to make the districts more competitive.
So in a wave election, like what we're planning to have this fall, where Democrats will take...
What do you mean to make it more competitive?
Well, each district gets gerrymandered to make sure that Democrats can win, but instead of winning some seats by, you know, 80%.
Right.
Now they can only win them by 54%, 55%.
Oh, I see. Right.
So in a wave election, the water would swan.
you out. So Texas, my home state, Trump pressured them into doing it, like you said. They started this.
They're actually quite likely to lose many of the seats they gerrymandered if the Democratic wave gets high enough.
They will be underwater. And in a year where there's a Republican wave, these Virginia seats will actually be lost by Democrats.
So like maybe, again, I don't know what we're fighting over. Again, a branch that like sits on Instagram and like takes pictures of themselves and says, send me $5.
So glad one party controls that.
Phew.
Well, oh, come on.
If the Democrats have the kind of success
a lot of us think they're going to have in the midterms,
you don't think that's going to make a difference?
You don't think that's going to be different.
If the Democrats control all the committees in that Congress...
They will not pass so much more,
not passing of legislation.
You're right.
Wow.
They'll do oversight and they'll have hearings
where they do more Instagram reels to raise more money.
They're not going to actually use the power.
power of the purse, passed legislation.
They might impeach someone. They're certainly not going to
convict them in the Senate, so it'll be another
great... That's the one thing they can't do is impeach.
You're right. That needs 67... They can't impeach.
They cannot remove.
That's the problem. Okay. Well, nobody cares about that.
Well, but I'll tell you when you care is when you
see six months of your life vanish
because you're watching that process
unfold and you know how it's going to end
when you've been through it twice before, and they're
doing it for the same reason they do the gerrymandering,
which is all that matters
to these people now is the retention
of their own power. And I think the reason
it's important this is happening is for
people to see what the governor was talking
to you about. Independent is the fastest
growing part of the electorate for a reason,
which is they hate the parties.
And the more people are anti-party,
the better a chance we have that anything gets better.
Although on the flip
side, thinking about this, on the flip
side, the reason, so independents now
are more than Republican or Democrats
for the first time in American history,
more people don't identify with a political party.
I would argue it's because we don't have
political parties anymore. We got rid of them with campaign finance reform in 2002,
which sounded like a good idea. But it means there is no one keeping all of the, you know,
inmates in the asylum anymore. The parties have no carrots, no sticks to keep these people in line,
no policy agenda. There's no policy platform for either party. Donald Trump defeated the
Republican Party before he defeated the Democratic Party in 2016. That's because we don't
have political parties. And I loved not having political parties until I saw the
result now, and I'm like, this isn't better?
But all his original fans are turning
on him. Have you seen that? I mean,
this week, Joe Rogan
and Tucker Carlson
both renounced the leader.
As has
Candace Owens did it,
Alex Jones, all the people.
All people I look to for advice.
I know. I know. I was like,
look, I respect how seriously
you're laying this out. I do.
I do. But just think about
what it says about where we are.
that we are in a place where we are looking at Candace Owens
and Tucker Carlson and Joe Rogan as bellwethers of our political status.
You know, like, wow, Rogan, what am I going to do now?
That he's not with Trump.
It's like, we are in mouth breather land in terms of how we formulate our positions.
It's like, oh, Tucker Carlson, he got attacked by a demon last week in his bedroom,
but now he's seen the light about Trump.
I don't know how to feel.
You know, it's a weird place.
We're in a weird place.
We're going.
It's a weird...
I never thought I would say that.
Wow, Tucker Carlson.
Yeah, Trump's going to have a problem.
He's going to have a problem keeping the faithful in there.
He's got Joe Rogan, you know, the psychedelics, you know.
Thank God he had that.
Otherwise, he would have lost him completely.
I think there's between Joe Rogan and Candace Owens and Alex Jones.
I do.
I think there's a bit of a difference.
I hope so.
Well, I don't know.
He's apparently going to the Trump is the correspondence dinner this year.
I'm very interested to see what this is going to.
to look like because, you know, the correspondence did it.
I think I did it one year.
They used to have comedians. By the way,
I said, because I got shit about it,
everybody, every comedian gets shit about it. It's the worst gig
in the world because half the people in the audience are
Republican, half of the Democrats. You can't insult
anybody what or what they say.
So they always, I said, just get a magician.
Just get somebody who doesn't do
political. They listen. They're always trying to get the political
and it's like the worst thing. Now they've got
they got a mentalist. So they can have a
a mentalist and a mental patient there.
No, I kid.
I joke with the president.
But, you know, the president traditionally...
I mean, this is why Trump,
a lot of people say this is why he ran for president
in the first week,
because he was at the one where Obama just tore him a new asshole
from the podium, and now he's going to get a chance
to say all sorts of insulting things to the press,
just like any one of his press conferences.
It's not really that different.
I agreed to do this show so I could avoid that dinner tomorrow night.
So thank you so much.
Oh, really?
That's the reason I'm here.
I wasn't invited.
No, I wasn't.
But I wouldn't have gone if they had invite me.
I want you to know that right now.
Right.
I would have said no.
And I'm going to give that tuxedo back right away.
Blue.
But he, I mean, it's kind of interesting because, you know,
when I look at the list of Paramounts,
which now apparently owns me,
um,
paid $16 million.
To settle a lawsuit.
This is the media that he's talking to here over the 60 Minutes interview with Kamala Harris.
Disney, one of my other old sponsors that fired me once,
agreed to pay $16 million over the George Stephanopoulos interview.
I mean, they famously took Jimmy Kimmel off the air for a while.
I mean, it's a little awkward him speaking to the people who he also calls the enemy of the American people.
He literally calls them the enemy.
which I find to be, I mean, I would be personally affronted by it,
but, you know, he does it to everybody.
But it is the fourth estate.
I mean, when you take on the press like that,
I think you are flirting with something that really knocks out
one of the pillars of what we love about this country.
Well, look, I think that we all get it.
We just don't know how anything gets better anymore.
And I don't have any problem with nerd problem.
You know, I get that people like to get dressed up.
They like to go.
Is that what you call it, nerd?
That's, yeah, everybody calls it.
Yeah, it's right.
But we've always called it.
It's all. It's the nerd prom and that's great.
That's great.
Well, I wasn't invited, you know, I'm too good looking.
So, you know, what I think you'll see there are also bills, how manufactured this is.
The division is manufactured.
Trump hates you, as you said, until he doesn't.
And he's going to go there and he's going to get laughs.
And you'll see that all these people who are there who are saying, you know, they are not real journalists and this isn't real one.
They're all getting along.
It's a club.
And once you understand.
that you realize why things don't change.
Really? You think that's...
I mean, again, to bring this back to the Supreme Court a little,
that's the branch that is functioning.
That's the branch that gets along.
They actually spend time together.
They have lunch three, four times a week
after they have oral argument
where they are not allowed to talk about work.
They have to talk about sports
or what their kids are majoring in.
Amy Coney Barrett loves binge-watching slow horses.
She was super pumped about the new season.
Like, this is a good thing for people
to actually have to see each other.
as humans.
And I hope that's what happens
at the White House Correspondence Dinner.
I read that reality TV
viewership is plummeting,
and I think politics is downstream
from culture, and I hope we are turning
the ship slowly away from reality politics.
All right.
Let's end on that positive note.
All right, thank you,
and you're both beautiful people.
It's time for new rules.
New rules.
Don't make your babies spout
your political opinions for you.
You don't know what
that kid believes. He looks pretty maggot to me. I say to babies what right-winger say to athletes.
Shut up and dribble. Uh, Newell, if you complain about Columbus Day because it ignores the fact
that he killed Indians and you complain about President's Day because it ignores the fact that
Washington owned slaves, then you can't happily go see a movie where Michael Jackson doesn't sleep
with kids. Which is the movie that's out now where we just hear about the fun things Michael did.
It's playing on a double bill with Jeffrey Epstein's super host extraordinaire, and John Wayne Gacy, thanks for the laugh.
I love that Red Lobster is reviving its endless shrimp deal.
Two years after they stopped doing it, because it had led to an $11 million loss, they must tell us, how can this work financially?
Unless you're planning to sell some outdated stash of frozen shrimp that you've had on ice since 2009.
Oh, I see.
Let's all give President Trump credit
where credit is due for forcing Iran
to call off their scheduled execution
of these women protesters.
It was the right thing to do,
and it sends a powerful message to the world.
If you're a woman in Iran
and you look hot at least an eight,
America has your back.
New Orleans, shopping in the grocery store
has to stop making me feel like I'm flirting
with statutory rape.
What's with very young, small, sweet peas?
and tater tots and baby carrots and extra virgin olive oil.
She, if I wanted to feel this pervy, I'll go see the Michael Jackson movie.
New Will, someone has to explain the American economy to me.
I know I've said this before.
I still don't get it.
Last week was Tax Day, and as usual, because HBO is so generous,
and I'm sure so will be the new owners.
I paid to the government if you add in state.
tax, local, sales,
property, fees, Obamacare,
probably almost 60%
of what I earn.
That's a lot. And I still wouldn't mind
if Bernie Sanders would stop
saying the rich don't pay taxes.
And while I'm sure the super
rich with their army of accountants
and corporate loopholes get away with murder,
us regular rich people pay
a shit ton of taxes.
And who stands up and gives us a pat
on the back? Nobody, that's who.
The top 10% pay 72% of all federal income taxes, and the bottom half, 3%.
The Democratic socialists talk about socialism like we don't already have a lot.
Social security, unemployment, Medicare, nutritional assistance, Medicaid, Obamacare,
disability, housing subsidies.
Again, not against it.
Just the same question.
How can you be soaking the rich and failing the poor so badly?
so badly that on 60 minutes last week,
they were redoing the story they did 18 years ago
about remote area medical.
That is the program modeled after medical teams
that drop into the poorest countries in the world
for a few days to set up a tent
where people with no access to health care can get some.
And now we're one of those countries.
Doctors within borders.
How can it be that the federal government
A loan took in over $5 trillion in taxes last year,
and we still need that.
Are we really this incompetent and corrupt?
Don't answer that.
Whatever it is, somehow the ultra-rich
keep getting ultra-richer,
while a growing percentage is feeling truly desperate.
You just wouldn't know it because everyone on TV is rich.
Reality TV, rich women day drinking.
Drama, rich women whose friend got murdered.
Comedy, rich men shouting into cell phones.
But these are the people with all the money.
Get this.
The richest one-tenth now does half of all the spending.
Somehow we created an economy
where the number of households worth $20 million or more
is $644,000.
Wow, that's a lot of people with $20 million.
And all of them are looking for a girlfriend on sugarbabies.com.
corporations go where the money is.
Las Vegas used to be the town of $8 all-you-can-eat-a-fas and hotels where every room was $29.
No, not anymore.
Go fuck yourself.
We don't want you.
Their business model now is they only want the high rollers.
Are you a whale?
No?
Then float yourself back out to see.
Who, that is not rich, could afford a concert now.
Woodstock was free.
Now if you want to see Morgan Wallen, you have to take out a second.
and mortgage on your trailer.
I kid the Hicks.
I love the Hicks.
Disneyland, for a family of four
to spend the weekend,
between the cost of the tickets,
plus lodging, airfare,
rental car, souvenirs, food.
We're talking 10 grand.
To afford that, the average dad
would have to be cooking meth on the side.
The Disneyland's
staff manual
used to read,
we roll out the red carpet
for the Jones family
from Juliet, just as we would
for the Eisenhower's from Palm Springs.
No, you don't.
Because the Eisenhower's from
Palm Springs can buy a Lightning Lane
Premier Pass that lets
you skip the lines. The Jones
family can suck my dick.
And Mickey could give a rat's ass.
Because that's what our
economy has become.
In 1992, a
Lego speedboat toy set
cost $2.99.
Today, Lego sells Titanic for $680.
It's an educational toy because you learn it sucks to be poor.
And nowhere is that more true than when it comes to health care.
Money can't buy happiness, but it sure can buy healthiness.
Half the country can buy access to concierge doctors, specialists, new treatments, personal trainers,
nutritionists, private chefs, and whatever Gwyneth Paltrow is putting in.
her vagina.
And the other half has the place I was just talking about, remote area medical, the pop-up
health care clinic that rolls into town once a year like a county fair, except instead
of riding the tilt-a-whirl, a volunteer doctor pulls your infected tooth. And the saddest
thing in the 60 Minutes piece is that nothing has changed since they covered it in 2008.
Same line of cars parked overnight so people make sure to get seen.
Same people who work two jobs but still can't afford to see a doctor
unless a touring nonprofit sets up shop in a parking lot.
But here's the truth.
You're not going to get health care to these people
by threatening to tax and eat the rich.
You raise billionaires' taxes, they just leave the state.
Or they leave the country.
Or in some cases, the planet.
I kid, Elon, but, you know, he had a good idea recently
that might be apropos here.
During the recent government shutdown,
volunteered to pay all the TSA workers himself, you know, with couch money.
That's how super rich are super rich are. They can single-handedly fund entire government programs.
Okay, so let's make that a thing. The Adopt-a-cause challenge for billionaires.
Teachers who buy school supplies with their own money or people without homes or disaster victims,
whatever it is, make the rich fox competitive
about solving it, because that's all they care about anyway, beating each other.
Just skip the middleman, the government and the health care bureaucracies,
that for whatever reason, no matter how much they take in, never seem to get enough to the people,
and just shame the billionaires into doing it directly,
because they have all the money, and noblese, oblige, isn't just the name of a cologne.
All right, thank you very much.
That's our show.
I want to thank Chris Cobo, Sarah Isger, Governor Westmore,
Robert Adams drops every Monday on YouTube
or listen wherever you get your podcast.
Now go watch overtime on YouTube.
Thank you very much, everybody.
I appreciate it.
Catch all new episodes of Real Time
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