Reddit Stories - ACQUAINTANCES DISCOVERED my partner's recording on the internet, so I APPROACHED her about

Episode Date: November 16, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #internetprivacy #confrontation #trustissues #privacybreachSummary: Acquaintances discovered my partner's recording on the internet, so I approached her about it, leading to a difficult conversation about trust and privacy boundaries.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, internetprivacy, confrontation, trustissues, privacybreach, partner, recording, conversation, boundaries, difficult, acquaintances, discovered, approached, difficultconversation, privacyboundariesBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Acquaintances discovered my partner's recording on the internet, so I approached her about it and she experienced a total collapse, after which her relatives implored me to remain and look after her during the difficult time. Police investigation revealed she was lying about it being non-consensual. Almost three weeks ago a good friend of mine, Alex and an acquaintance, Mike, got hold of a video of my girlfriend, Jamie, segs with another man. Mike found this browsing through PRN sites with niche themes and by chance, recognized Jamie.

We got into contact with Alex about it where both of them told me about the infidelity. When Alex and Mike told me of the infidelity, I went somewhere between shock and numb. I couldn't really say anything until I saw the video where I proceeded to puke my guts out. I couldn't even sit through a minute of it. The fact that it was edited to go straight into the action with Jamie's face close. clearly visible didn't help. We drove Mike home and Alex had good sense to force me to spend the night at his place rather than go home where I share an apartment with Jamie with no idea how that would end. We shared some beers mostly in silence. Alex did try to make me open up

on what I felt about Jamie's infidelity, but I was just numb. I didn't know what I felt and told him so. I felt like wading through water with no thought in mind other than what was in front of me. Alex didn't force anymore and I passed out some time later. When I woke up, I recovered enough sense to realize that our relationship was most likely over. I go straight home through public transport, most likely brooding and or looking pissed. I wonder what the other passengers thought when they saw me looking like shit while trying to emulate Batman. I get home and catch her getting ready to go out, ask me where I was and why I didn't contact her. I don't bother answering and just told her we needed to talk.

We sit down facing each other on our kitchen table that we built from scratch in my grandfather's farm and that random thought pretty much broke the dam. A lot of stuff happened, a lot of harsh words was said, accusations, and blame. Too many details to describe, but essentially, I immediately broke down in tears and asked her how the fuck she could ruin this relationship

we worked so hard on. She's confused and wanted an explanation, I dropped the bomb and show the video. She cries, begs for forgiveness, but I hear nothing. More crying and cursing until I tell her that we're over. That was it and she just, shuts off. She slumped down and closed her eyes, still crying, but says nothing. This gets me out of anger and I try to figure out what she's doing.

Talking to her, hard and gentle prodding, nothing. She's really unresponsive, so I just drag. her to our bed and lay her there. I go back to our kitchen and call her parents, Alice and Julio. I simply told them they needed to come and that their daughter is suffering a mental breakdown. I say nothing more than just telling them that they needed to see us and that what was happening needed to be face to face to explain. I shut my phone off, go back to kitchen and think about what the hell just happened. Her parents rushed to our apartment demanding WTF happened. I don't tell them about Jamie's infidelity but just say she needed mental help,

she's on the bed acting comatose but otherwise, okay. They couldn't bring her out of it and eventually I had to explain. I didn't want to do it without Jamie being able to explain herself. I showed them the video and their heartbroken, told them we had an argument, I didn't hurt her, but she probably couldn't handle the stress and broke down. They decide to bring Jamie to her University's mental health clinic. I decide not to go with them. The next day, Jamie eventually wakes up. She's stable and responsive. There, she says that the video was not consented. Her family decide to report this to cybercrime police. Jamie's family don't grill her with her mental state being the way it is, but her parents are obviously ashamed and aren't sure what to do

other than what the psychologist recommends, which is to let Jamie rest for a while and support her until they're sure she doesn't implode than was sent home to her parents. This was all relayed to me by her older sister, Jackie, who's trying to be the mediator. She asked me if I really was going to end the relationship. I respond that I'm not sure if we can even salvage it. Two days later, Jamie's parents asked me to visit them for a talk. I agree and go the next day. Jamie's parents and her older sister are present. We go to their living room and sit down. They looked sad and tired and I felt the same.

Jamie will be the last topic of our talk. First is me. They wanted my parents to be involved. I feel disrespected as we're already adults plus me and my father are tense but I relent as I'm already tired and a bit out of my depth. which was in discussion in the past after all. Finally, we talk about Jamie. She's stuck in her room, miserable and ashamed, otherwise, okay.

She'll stay with her parents for now. When she's needed by the police she can stay with Jackie in a hotel. They understand that I needed space. They've submitted a report to our cities, they live one to two hours away in the suburbs, cybercrime office. I'm needed for the investigation. I explained that I wasn't the one who found the video, but I'll try to get Mike involved. They apologize for Jamie, but I tell them she's the one who needed to apologize and that they shouldn't baby her.

They agree but beg me not to argue right now since Jamie may relapse. They explain her psychologist assessment. Spontaneous nervous breakdown, no history of mental illness, concluded to be caused by accumulated stress from her studies and acute stress reaction from our argument. She needs rest in a safe environment. Syke almost called the police on me, but they convinced them not to and with no physical trauma observed, gave up. The discussion devolved to apologizing, tears from Alice especially, and other noise. But they did want to take charge of everything.

The investigation, Janie's well-being, her education and finances, etc. I was kind of washed off of everything. Eight days later, Alice calls me in the middle of the night begging me to see Jamie. Depressive episode, Kitchen Knife, Locked in the Bathroom Yelling for Me. Worst Hour of My Life I'm pretty sure I almost died twice on the road and glad that my country isn't developed enough for highway cameras. I meet Alice and Jackie outside the house waiting for me. Jamie has mostly calmed and Julio's with her in her room.

They beg me to go see her and with how bad the situation looked, I rushed to Jamie. She's a fucking wreck, looked like her blood's been drained and hasn't slept for a while. She starts crying the moment she sees me and reaches out her arms. Whatever anger, exhaustion, and anxiety melted away and I embrace her. She kept apologizing and begging for me to stay. I shush her and hold her tight. She eventually goes to sleep and I take a moment. moment to think about what's happening. I genuinely felt heartbroken seeing her like this.

This is not how I thought will be together in the future, much less this Christmas. I am losing my best friend and would have been partner for life. This was the person who helped me through my depression when even my own family dismissed it. She's even the one who made me make journals to help process what I go through. It's actually ironic how she's the reason how good I can write down details on her affair and how bad it affected me. She's not evil. She's a beautiful, patient, and overall wonderful human being. Thinking of all the stuff we've been through, what we've done for each other, if I were to list all of it would probably reach twice the word count for my post. I love her and was prepared to be with her for life and face everything

that comes with it. And she destroyed that. I wake up before her and go to the kitchen for coffee. Jackie is there and explains that she's had episodes twice before and this was the worst yet. All of us except Jamie talk on what to do. Alice is in chemo for breast cancer, Julio runs a business 20 minutes away, Jackie's workplace is already hounding her, and Jamie needs help. The situation is fucked and everyone is exhausted. Jamie needs therapy, I implied mental institution and that almost got my head torn off. but no one can look after her 24 to 7.

They ask me to reschedule the inevitable and try to help her. There were definitely some emotional manipulation, but they are desperate. Due to my obvious lingering attachment and my own respect and love for these people, I agree. This is where I fucked up. I go home, talk to Mike about the investigation, he agrees to talk to the police. I call Alex and explain the all the BS happening. He warns me that this didn't sound like the right call, a mental institution was probably the best, and I'm just going to get hurt. Regardless, he'll still stand by my decision and to call when I need him.

I love this guy. I've already scheduled a consultation for therapy and Jamie will have a different one scheduled three days from now in my city. I just want to take a really long nap and get away from all this. Update, so, it's been over two weeks since my last post where I'm a little bit. I got proceeded to get my ass handed to me. I'm not complaining, you guys were right. I do need to leave and start living my own life. A lot has actually happened since then, but, thankfully, most of it's boring, sad and disappointing.

Got myself a behavioral therapist which something I should have done a long time ago. I have different problems unrelated to this that Jamie did help me through most, but a professional really does make a difference. It gave me a lot of hard questions, important questions, that forced me to put my life into perspective. It was liberating experience. Finally talked with my own family about this. For context, I'm not very close with my actual parents, particularly with my father. Broken home and all that. I consider my aunts, my father's four sisters, who stepped up to take care of me as a child to be my real parents. So if I mention family, I really mean just my four moms. Turns out, they were more involved than I thought.

Jamie talks to them, she loved talking with them about me and our relationship, they got closer for it too. She asked so many questions about me, what I'd liked, food, hobbies, what my childhood was like. She'd ask advice from them about so many things. What to do when I get pissy, how to get my ass moving, all that cute. stuff. Around a year ago when they noticed that I started acting positively when they played around with the topic of marriage, Jamie and my family started to get ready. Three of them have families with at least three children each, so to help ease the accommodation, they saved money to pay for themselves and anything extra goes to the wedding, to us and whatever after. They even talked

about engagement rings. Calling them disappointed is an understatement. With the bullshit happening now, opted to give me half of what they saved for the marriage to help me out and also offered to take me back again which truly is a massive help. My biggest problem this whole time was the source of income. I didn't have a job lined up out of my city, still don't, and my savings are meager. With all that settled, I gave my employer my resignation letter, cancelled my lease and have by the end of the month to sort my affairs. I'm leaving for good.

As for Jamie, I've gradually stepped out of whatever's been happening with her and around her. Talked with her family or more like told them that I'm leaving. Gave them info about psychiatric hold and made them handle her appointments with her psychologist and whatever else she needs. It was a sad affair, really. I know it doesn't seem like it, especially with Alice and Julio making me stay and take care of Jamie, but this is a first time for all of us. They raised four great kids, their relationships are great, and they even extended that to me even when they barely knew me. Jamie fucked up the worse and this isn't something anyone can expect anyone else to handle

with ease and grace. I mourned my loss of a potential family that I could have been proud to be with. For the POS who filmed her. I still haven't confronted her about it, but Mike and Jackie shared what she told the police and how the investigation's going. It was a Korean national she says she met on social. social media for a fling. She said they only fucked once but that was immediately shot down. The video showed two different, distinct rooms and got pressure to admit where it was in case

they can get anything like CCTV, social media posts, log books, witnesses, etc., and that they did. One hotel still had recordings that day, two hotels with log books containing names and dates, and their DMs. She didn't mention rape, blackmail, or drugs in play, only mild intoxication which was all obvious in the video apparently. Everything but the recording was consented. There were some possible routes to take in terms of damages, but when a lawyer got contacted, it was pretty much dead on the water. POS being a Korean national currently in Korea muddied the legal waters.

They can do nothing else other than contact relevant Korean authorities, gather as much evidence and weight. But the lawyer wasn't confident anything might stick. As far as they know, they have no evidence that it was even POS who set up the cameras the only thing that's obvious beyond that POS stayed the night before and the cameras are obviously long since gone. There are far too many angles POS can play to delay or even win any lawsuit that reaches him.

It will be most likely expensive, drawn out, and with very little chance of winning. So they gave up that route. POS is getting off scotch-free. Why did Jamie do it? I don't know. Before, I didn't have the guts to ask her. Now it doesn't really matter. I'm not as exhausted as before and my mind's been clearer.

I'm leaving for good regardless of why she did it. I can just walk straight out with no explanation or maybe leave a letter for her, thanking her for the wonderful time we spent together, the love we shared, and a final goodbye. I'm romantic like that. Still, I've decided to handle this with as much grace as I can. I'll help when worse comes to worst, don't lay blame on myself or her family, and not even mount pressure on Jamie for ruining everything. Not for Jamie but for my own twisted sense of self-gratification that I did all what can be expected and more. I will leave with my back straight and nose held high.

Funnily enough, this did eventually show me how lucky I am despite everything. Yes, the love of my life cheated on me and had the audacity to throw a tantrum over it. My future's looking a little bleak, I found out so much repressed anxiety and anger for my shitty childhood. But I'm still doing pretty great. I have family that loves me, friends that have my back, and despite her betrayal, brought the best out of me with wonderful memories along with it. I have nothing to be ashamed of, and can say with pride that I was a wonderful boyfriend. Hopefully this will be my last update, if not, the next to be far more boring and less mouthy.

Mini update and comment, Hey guys, OOP here. I've been here for a while so I'm very surprised seeing my nightmare being posted. I'm cool with it but damn I wasn't expecting seeing this to ruin my day. To clarify, this all happened in the Philippines. As far as I know, the Sags tapes were made many months prior the first post. While I'm no longer involved with my ex and her family, I'm confident they no longer pursued legal action due to the lack of evidence and, of course, the complexity of suing a foreign national currently in a foreign country.

They have no direct evidence that the man she cheated on me with perpetrated unconsensual filming of sexual acts. It doesn't help that it took many months for us to know it even happened. Edit, there's been a lot of people asking how Jamie is. I don't know. I don't intend to find out either. I also don't feel like making an update to my situation other than I moved recently and doing okay. Next story, husband left me and our toddler then begged me back so I moved cities and got a new job but found out he was having an affair, then he kept promising to change while still sleeping with her.

My husband and I have been together almost eight years, married for two and half of those. Last May, 2019, we separated seemingly overnight. He left me and our toddler and moved back to his hometown. There was never a solid reason given, just that he felt we should have never gotten married. In July, he changed his tune and wanted to be a family again. He was still at his job in his hometown, so I decided I would ride it out at my job in a different city for a couple of months to build my resume and then start looking for other jobs in his hometown. After six months of a brutal commute, taking care of our child during the week by myself and driving to his hometown every weekend, interviewing, basically bending over backwards, I finally landed a great job in December. A week before I was to move into the new house we were buying together and start my new job, I found out he had been having an affair.

He begged and pleaded for me to stay with him, said he'd break off all contact, and I foolishly agreed to give him another chance. Two days later while I was back in the different city and completing my last week of work at my old job, he unblocked her on everything and liked her pictures on Instagram. I was devastated. On top of that shit show, he kicked me out of the house we were supposed to move and together and I had to find a new place to live two days before starting my new position. We have lived separately ever since. He has said and done so many hateful things in this time period, and said so many times that he wants a doctor. divorce that I've lost count. Up until a month ago he was still maintaining contact with her. I saw her car at his house, took pictures for the lawyers, etc., and he admitted he had been talking with her still. I stopped doing the pick-me dance about a month ago and stopped reaching out to him besides contact about our child. Now he has suddenly changed his tune and is desperate

to get me back and will do anything. He has unfollowed her on everything. He has unliked all her pictures. Tells me not to give up on our family. I've moved on. I am not interested in pursuing another relationship with him. He's hurt me deeply and I feel like I've been fucked over by him so many times that I've lost count. How can I tell him there isn't a chance without sounding like a completely heartless person? I still want to be able to maintain a strong co-parenting relationship with him, so I am friendly to him, but he seems to take that as I want him back. I have relayed to him my feelings, but they fall on deaf ears. He says he will never stop trying to get our family back together and does not want a divorce. I do. Does anyone have

advice? Edit 1, just to show the kind of person he is. When I asked him about the reason for his sudden change of heart, he said it was because I seem stronger. Ah, the irony. Honestly, a big thank you to the prick for yanking the rug under my feet not once, but twice, because I truly have realized how much better I can do and how I don't need anyone but myself to have a happy life. Edit 2, seriously, thank you to everyone who has read my story and commented. You have no idea how much it's helping me to focus on myself and realize I need stop considering the feelings of someone who had no consideration of mine. I only hope that anyone who is in a similar situation realizes that you can and you do move

on. And I promise that you will feel like a 10,000 pound weight has been lifted off your back. Edit 3. He is being served papers in the next one to two weeks. Guaranteed the I've changed mask slips off. I hope I'm wrong, but I've learned all too well that my gut feelings are usually spot on. Hopefully I'll be back with an update in a few months with the good news that the split is official. Update, well, turns out my gut instincts were right. The entire time he was begging for another chance and promising this time would be different, I roll, he was still sleeping with the affair partner and telling him he loved her and would do anything to make it work with her.

It didn't even hurt me to find it out. I was that unsurprised. It just helped me stop feeling guilty. I divorced his ass. I thank the universe every day that he is no longer connected to me in a romantic way. It feels like an enormous weight has been lifted off my shoulder. Shortly after my original post I met someone by chance at a wedding and fell in love. This person is everything my ex-husband was not.

The kindness, compassion, and respect they show not just me, but to my daughter as well, is like something from a dream. I never knew love could be so easy. To anyone in a loveless marriage reading this leave. Do the hard thing especially if they have a pattern of leaving slash returning slash cheating, etc. Lord knows I was terrified to cut the cord. At one point in time I was actually starting to feel bad for the guy because he was begging me every single day for another chance.

He tried to convince me that getting a divorce would ruin my future, our daughter's future, that she would come from a broken family, but it was the exact opposite. It was broken already and I fixed it. Once I made up my mind that divorce was the best option, I absolutely thrived. I learned independence. I found how to be happy on my own. I found happiness in a partner. Life has never been so sweet.

The bad shit makes the good shit so much better. Thank you, Reddit, for the support on my original post. It helped turn my graveyard into a garden.