Reddit Stories - BANISHED_ DEFYING Harmful GUARDIANS from My Wedding Guest List_

Episode Date: October 21, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #weddingdrama #familyissues #relationshipadvice #boundaries #guestlistdramaSummary:A Reddit user seeks advice after deciding to banish harmful guardians from their wedding guest list. The situation escalates as family tensions rise, leading to difficult choices and emotional turmoil.Tags:redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, weddingdrama, familyissues, relationshipadvice, boundaries, guestlistdramaBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Harmful guardians tormented me for an extended period, hence I decided not to include them in my wedding guest list. However, my sibling is imploring me to extend an invitation to them and has even offered to cover their expenses. Attend because this is my mom's last wish. So I, 25F, have never really had a good relationship with my family. I grew up as a farm kid in Missouri and lived there until it was time for me to go to college.

My family consisted of me, my parents, my older sister, 30F, and my grandmother. Of all these people, the only person I had a somewhat normal relationship with, would be my sister. Mind you, we are not close, it's just that she didn't come after me as much as everybody else in the family did. I guess the part where I failed my family was my appearance since I was born with the disease called Vitiligo. And everybody else in their family, let's just say that they are the beauty standard. They are all tall, blonde, and beautiful. Not me, though, according to them, I was the ugly duckling of the family and they never let me forget it even for one second. My face had a huge patch of discoloration and my family loved to make fun of me for that.

They would compare me to the cows and tell me that God must have made a mistake and made me a human instead of a calf. I can imagine what kind of toll it must have taken on me as a young child because I became very self-conscious of my looks. As if getting bullied by kids at school was not bad enough, I had to face that kind of thing at home as well. When I started getting older, I tried to stand up for myself, but they would tell me that they were just joking and I shouldn't get so sensitive about everything. Those snide remarks disguised as jokes continued for a really long time, and it would always hurt me.

I was really relieved when I got to leave for college because then, I would finally be on my own and I chose a college that was the farthest from my home, so I wouldn't be expected to come back often and would only return for the holidays. In college, I was the happiest version of myself because people were a lot more open-minded here and I decided that once I graduated, there was no way that I would be going back home at any cost. Another reason that I did not want to go back home was because I had finally found the love of my life when I was in college and that's the guy that I'm getting married to now. Jacob and I became friends in our first year and started dating towards the end of our second year. Since then, we have stayed together and it is the best thing

that's ever happened to me. While my family made me feel like I was the ugliest person on earth, he made me feel exactly the opposite. When I went back home for my sister's wedding in my final year of college, I was going to tell them about Jacob so I could introduce him to them when I came back for the holidays that year, but something that they said at the wedding made me feel so awful that I decided that after I graduated from college. I would not like to keep in touch with him anymore. On the day of the wedding, one of my uncles was kind of teasing me about how it was my turn next, and if I had somebody in mind, then it was the right time for me to come up and say it to my parents. He was just messing around with me, but my grandmother made a remark about how

it was very unlikely that I would have somebody because with that face, I would never find anyone. And my parents were the first people to agree and then they started laughing as if it was the funniest thing. Everybody got awkward and didn't really say anything, but that comment really hurt me, even though they had made comments like that several times before. I don't know why, but that particular incident hurt me like never before and I made up my mind that they did not deserve to be part of my life. A couple of months after my sister's wedding, I graduated and as a formality, I invited my parents to the graduation ceremony. They attended and we were cordial with each other, I even introduced them to Jacob as my boyfriend, and they did not even bother to hide

their shock that somebody as normal as him was willing to be with me. By then, I had told Jacob all about my family and how cruel they were, so he did not interact much with them either. After the graduation ceremony, I thanked my parents for paying for everything through college, and I told him that as soon as I could afford it, I would pay them back. I also told them that I had decided to stay and I wouldn't be going back to the farm with them. That seemed to tick them off a bit, but I said that I liked the city life more and they left after a really cold goodbye. Since then, a couple of years have passed, and we haven't really had any proper contact. They wish me on my birthdays and on the holidays since I don't go back home anymore.

And I wish them back but that's about it and I'm really happy with this arrangement because after the way they have treated me my entire life, I think this is for the best. After graduation, Jacob and I moved and together and his parents were kind enough to cover our rent until both of us were able to find stable jobs because I wasn't going back home. A couple of months ago, at the beginning of this year, he proposed to me and I accepted. It was about time, since we have been together for ages now and recently, the invitations were sent out. My sister and her husband received one, but I did not invite my parents or my grandmother. and I think the reasons for that are pretty obvious, I don't even speak to them much and they are not

the kind of people that I would want around me on such a special day. I honestly did not think that my family would be shocked that they were not invited, but they were in as soon as they realized that they had not received an invitation, my mother called me up to tell me how unfair and insulting this was. My sister received her invitation a week ago, and three days back, my mother called me up to tell me that my family was still waiting for their invitation to my wedding. She said that she had been able to overlook the fact that they hadn't been invited to my engagement party, but the wedding was a big deal and she expected me to be a bit more punctual with the invites, at which point,

I told her that she did not receive the invitations because I had no intention of having them at my wedding at all. Then, she started yelling at me about how I was an ungrateful child who had first snubbed the opportunity to inherit the farm and respect the family business that had given me everything that I wanted and now, I was acting like I was too good for them just because they were simple farm folk. That was pretty ridiculous. So I clarified the real reason that I did not want them at my wedding was because of the comments they had made about me and my appearance my entire life and she tried to say that they were just jokes and it was petty of me to take them to heart. But I told him that that's just how it was and I did not want them in my life.

Then, I hung up and blocked her and for good measure, I blocked my dad as well. It was very very very very satisfactory for me because I had wanted to do that for a really long time and I finally had an excuse to go no contact with them permanently without feeling guilty about it later. But within two hours of that, my sister called me up and told me that she was willing to cover the cost of everything, right from flying our family down here to the cost of accommodation and even having them at the wedding. But all she wanted me to do was just extend an invitation to them and apologize for what I had said about not wanting them in my life. I thought it was weird that she was taking their side because she usually stays out of the family drama and I found

it offensive because I had invited her and her husband. So I couldn't understand why she was trying to get me to invite our family as well and I told her that she was free not to attend if she felt strongly about this but I was not extending any invitation to our family. And then, she told me this was not about her or how she felt but there was something that I didn't know and our family hadn't told me or anybody else about it because they didn't want me to worry while I was in another state but my mom had actually been diagnosed with stage two lung cancer a couple of weeks ago and apparently. It was her last wish to see her daughter getting married. They had apparently kept this a secret because not only was I in another state, but I was also getting married in a couple of weeks,

so they did not want to put a damper on the celebration by sharing this somber news. And apparently my family didn't know that my sister was telling me about this, but she was just really desperate for me to invite our family and make amends with them because this was my mother's last wish and she told me that I would regret it for the rest of my life if I didn't invite them and at least try to fix my relationship with my mother before something happened. That news changed everything because now, I felt like I would be the bad guy forever if I didn't make amends with my dying mother. I mean, how do you hold a grudge against somebody who has been diagnosed with cancer? It's really difficult, especially when that person is your own mother.

So I was a total mess after that phone call with my sister and had no idea what to do until I called Jacob and told him all about it, and he was the one who suggested that they might be lying for sympathy. Until then, I had been so emotional that I hadn't even considered that possibility, but after he brought it up, I decided to think about it. I didn't know who to talk to at that point because my sister had made it very clear to me that nobody else apart from her, my father and my grandmother knew about the diagnosis. So I decided to contact my aunt, my mother's younger sister who had helped me settle in when I first moved here and I knew that she was nothing like my mom and grandma. And I'm pretty sure that, even if I did talk to her about this, in case the diagnosis was

real, my mother would have no reason to mind it because that was her own sister after all and they were pretty close. She and I have always had a moderately good relationship, so when I told her about what my sister had said, she told me that she had been considering bringing this up with me but was having second thoughts. But since I myself had called to talk to her about it, she had decided that she couldn't lie to me and was not going to cover for my mother. She told me that apparently, when my sister received an invitation, but they didn't, my parents and my grandmother had been really offended. Then, they had contacted her to find out if she had received an invitation as well, and when they discovered that she had, there was no

stopping them and my mother had apparently been telling everyone that the reason that I had snubbed my parents was that I did not think that they were worthy of being invited since they were simple farm folk. Once again, that was not true. My mother had confided to my aunt that she was not going to let this go unanswered and was going to call me up and confront me about it, and had told her that apparently if I still refused to respect their right to attend my wedding, that's what they said. They would just tell me that my mother was sick and knowing the emotional fool that I am. I would forgive them instantly and invite them to the wedding along with an apology. Once they were at my wedding, they would make sure that I never forgot that day, and it sounded

quite ominous. So my aunt had wanted to discuss it with me but didn't know if it was her place to say something. She then apologized to me for not bringing it up with me earlier and I forgave her because, after all, I never would have found out about any of this if she hadn't spilled the beans. After she told me the truth, I called Jacob back to let him know that he had been right. my mother had been lying so they could weasel their way into receiving an invitation out of sympathy, and then, they planned on attending my wedding and ruining it for me. Both of us were pretty pissed off and we decided to make a post on social media regarding

this since I had learned that they had also been going around telling people that I was not inviting them since they were farm folk and I thought I was too good for them. So we put out the truth and after that, I blocked my sister as well since she had clearly been part of this whole mess and had picked which side she wanted to be on. I also texted her to let her know that I was rescinding her invitation and I did not want her at my wedding either. Once that was all done, Jacob and I finally felt a bit better about the situation, but after I put up my post, I received a message from my grandmother's phone number, whom I had forgotten to block. It was clearly my mother and she had sent a text saying that it didn't matter what I posted on social media,

she was still going to make sure that I did not get to go through with the wedding because she was never going to allow any of this to happen without her blessing. She said that I would never be happy with Jacob without the blessing of my family and I still had the chance to fix things with her. That made me so angry that I responded to her and told her that I really wished that she actually had been diagnosed with cancer because then I might have found her a bit easier to tolerate because I knew that I wouldn't have to put up with her for much longer. Then I blocked that number as well. But unfortunately, I realized that I shouldn't have responded to her at all because she took a screen shot of that message from me and put it up on her social media accounts and now, half of the

family thinks that I took it too far while the other half thinks that my parents are sick in the head. I kind of feel bad about that comment though because I don't want to be the kind of person who says things like that, but I feel like I had been pushed to the limit that day. So I'd offer saying that I wished my mother had truly been diagnosed with lung cancer? Edit. Hi, so some people were wondering why my parents would be annoyed with the fact that I wouldn't be coming back home with them after graduation if they really seemed to dislike me so much. That's actually because my parents had always instructed me and my sister were going to take over the farm once they got too old. They expected us to run it, side by side, and part of the reason that they wanted me as well was

because they wanted it to stay within the family. If the control of the farm went entirely to my sister, there was no doubt that her husband would stake a claim to it as well and they did not want that. Me being part of the equation would probably prevent that and we have had a discussion about this as well. One time, a couple of days after my sister's wedding, and even then I had been planning to say no, but I didn't say it because I didn't want to fight with them while I was still in college and relying on them for my expenses. A lot of people believe that I should have cut them off after I moved away for college or at least after I graduated and wish I could have done that, but I did not want to cut them off while I was in college because otherwise, I would not have anybody to rely on to pay for everything and that would be a big problem. After that, I didn't cut them off because it just seemed

a little unnecessary since I had already moved far away and had distanced myself from them both physically and emotionally. But right, I guess I should have done that. Update 1, thank you so much, you guys, for taking time out of your day to comment on the post. It's been four days and my family is still blocked. I'm not going to apologize to them for anything. Jacob and I had a discussion. about this at length and we realized that I was stressing way too much about what my family thought of me. If certain people were with my parents in this matter, that was their prerogative altogether. If they wished not to attend my wedding because they wanted to support my parents, I couldn't change their minds and I really didn't want to anymore. So after discussing it with each other,

we decided to put out a statement saying that at this point, we were really done with this entire fiasco. If people wanted to attend my wedding, they were free to do so and if they were free to do so and if they didn't, they really didn't have to. I also mentioned that most people in my family have always known that my parents and my grandmother have been nothing short of cruel to me all my life, and have always made fun of my appearance. Knowing that I have a medical condition and cannot do anything about it. They have always made me feel ugly and small, and since they can't tolerate the fact that I'm not trying to get along with them anymore, they don't respect me either. It felt good to say it out loud because I was getting sick of people and my family thinking that

they could just text me that I had taken things too far and thinking that that would make me apologize to my parents. They had never bothered to think about what I had been going through all these years and my parents, the people who were supposed to protect me from the world, ended up being the people who made me feel worse about myself. They had never supported me during childhood and told my parents that they were wrong for the things that they said, so how was it that my, saying something cruel to my mother out of anger as retaliation, was any worse than what they were doing? At least I had been provoked. That could be my excuse, but I was a child when my parents used to say such horrible things to me.

What was their excuse? I put all of these thoughts together and made a post with Jacob and after that, we have not received any messages from any relatives telling me that I had taken things too far. The ones who were on my side had been kind enough to reach out to me to tell me that I was not alone, and they were with me and the people who had at least bothered to take a stand for me in the past against my parents, so I was grateful for that. The rest of my family member, who are with my parents, can go take a hike. I really don't care about them anymore. Update 2, hi, so we are just a week away from the wedding,

and today, my aunt showed up at my house in the morning to tell us that my parents were here with my grandma. She told me that my mother still had no idea who was the one who had revealed their plan to me, she trusted my aunt implicitly, so she thinks that I guessed her plan, which is very stupid. Anyway, they contacted my aunt to tell them that they had landed last night and were staying in a hotel near my house. Apparently, they planned on confronting me on the day of the wedding, right before the ceremony. I don't know how they are expecting to be able to do that because I'm getting married in a hotel, which is not even close to my house, and even if they do

come along with me. They are not going to get any rooms to stay in that hotel since it's been booked up for ages. More importantly, there is going to be security there. I don't know how they are planning to pull this off. Anyway, I thanked my aunt for letting me. me know, but I found it a bit strange that she had come all the way to my house to tell me something that she could have just shared with me on the phone. When I asked her about it, she started looking really uneasy and said that the reason she had to come was because last night, my mother put her on the phone with my grandma and they kind of cornered her. They started taunting her about how, in spite of having a daughter who lives here, my grandmother

is still having to put up in a hotel instead of being invited to stay at her daughter's house. My aunt told me that she had really tried to avoid it, but apparently, they had really pushed her into letting them stay with her instead and now, they were at her house. So she was kind of skeptical about texting me or calling me to let me know what was going on. That's why she had chosen to visit me and she apologized to me profusely, but she just said that she was finding it very difficult to go against her mother and her sister and she really wanted to be on the right side of things, but they were making it really difficult for her to say no. personally think that it was pretty weak of my aunt to give them so easily, but I told her that it was fine that they were staying with her and not in a hotel like they intended, since now I could just go to her house with her and confront them about what they were planning to do. In a hotel, it might have been a slightly more complicated situation because there is security

and stuff. Anyway, my aunt did not want me to do that, but I convinced her and now, Jacob and I are heading over to her place. Update 3, hi, so we just came back from my aunt's place about an hour ago and we had a pretty big showdown with my parents and my grandmother. But I don't feel bad about it in the slightest, in fact, I feel really relieved because I think I have finally managed to shake them off and they probably won't be bothering me anytime soon. So as soon as I showed up at the house with my aunt, my mother started looking really shocked to see me. Then, she came to the realization that it must have been my aunt who had spilled the beans about their plan to me earlier. And then my grandmother and my mom started yelling at my

and about how she had betrayed them. But I nipped it in the bud because this was supposed to be about my equation with them and I wasn't going to let them distract me. So I told her, as politely as I could, that I had made it very clear that I did not want them at my wedding, and neither did I want anything to do with them in the future. If they couldn't take the hint, I could definitely call the cops on my wedding day and they could give him a clear picture of what I wanted to do with them, which was nothing. My parents got mad because apparently, I had no right to threaten them after everything that they had done for me. So I told them that whatever they had done for me,

it had been because they had chosen to have me and it was not like they were doing me a favor by raising me. I also reminded them that they had only ever done the bare minimum. They have never been affectionate or loving to me and that's what a kid definitely needs when they're growing up. I got a bit emotional while telling them that they had made me feel like crap about myself from my entire childhood and when I was finally happy as a grown-up, they couldn't stand it and wanted to ruin it for me.

I called them selfish and said that I was really glad that they had decided to show up here, so I could finally say all these things to their face because maybe then my words would finally make sense to them. After my emotional outburst, I stormed out of the house without even waiting for a response and got into the car. Jacob and I drove back home in silence and once we were back, he comforted me as I cried so that I could get it all out of my system. I feel much better about this situation now and my aunt has texted me to tell me that after I left,

my mother and my grandmother turned on her for a bit, but she finally stood up to them and asked them to leave. So they packed up their things and left within half an hour and she doesn't know if they are going to stay in a hotel now or if they're just going to go back home but she's just glad that they're out of our hair. Update 4. So I got married last week and it was absolutely surreal. After the last update, I had no interactions with my parents, and I hadn't even kept in touch with anybody who was still speaking to them. So I felt very lost since I had no idea what they were up to, and I was afraid that they were planning to do something on the day of my wedding since I was pretty sure that because I had invited my sister, she must have told them all about the wedding

venue and stuff. But, thankfully, none of my worst fears materialized and I was able to get married without a hitch. I had posted some photos on social media. and my sister actually reached out to me to let me know that she was really sorry for playing along with my parents and said that she realized that it was really wrong of her. I had blocked her phone number so she reached out to me on social media, since she could still contact me there. Anyway, she told me that she was really happy for me and congratulated me on the wedding and I thanked her. We left it at that because I have not completely forgiven her but at least she had the good sense to apologize. guys. Maybe someday I will forgive her and maybe we might reconcile, but that's going to take a long time because now, I just want to enjoy my new life with Jacob. Some people that I will definitely

never be reconciling with though, and my parents because even though they did not pull off anything at the wedding, which I'm really thankful for, they reached out to me a couple of days back to let me know that they will be cutting me out of their life permanently and legally. So they were just disowning me and after they are gone, I will not be inheriting anything. I'm fine with that, to be honest, I actually never expected them to include me and there will in the first place. And even if they had, I would think that they would leave me something completely pointless or useless because everything good was obviously going to go to my sister.

They wrote an email to me and after reading that, I just deleted it and moved on with my life because I really don't care. I'm going to leave for my honeymoon in a couple of days and I'm just going to have fun now.