Reddit Stories - BETRAYED_ A Year of Silence and FINANCIAL Lies by a DECEPTIVE Ex-Spouse_

Episode Date: September 19, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #divorce #deception #financiallies #betrayalSummary:Discover a story on Reddit about a year of silence and financial deceit by an ex-spouse. Dive into the complexities of betrayal and deception in relationships.Tags:redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, divorce, deception, financiallies, betrayalBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Deceptive former spouse manipulated our daughter and refused to communicate with me for 12 months, before feigning financial hardship to relinquish custody for a carefree lifestyle. I'll persevere. Right into it, so my daughter Jenny, 17F, stopped speaking to me, 44M, last year, right in the middle of my divorce proceedings. I had no idea why and even lost my custody of her during the legal battle because she insists. it that she wanted to be with her mother, my ex-wife Cheryl, 42F, and not me. She said that it was because she got along with her mother better than she did with me, but that was a blatant lie

because Jenny had always been more on my side. The switchover happened randomly and without explanation, I never even got to the bottom of it because she moved out and started living with her mother soon after the custody battle began and didn't talk to me much unless it was about important stuff. I was heartbroken and tried to get her back on my side a lot of time, but she was very clear about what she wanted and that was to live with her mom, so after some time I stopped trying. After the divorce, I still had visiting rights, but she told me that she didn't want to see me anymore, not after whatever had happened with her mother. I didn't understand what she was referring to because I hadn't done a thing, it was Cheryl who cheated on me and that's why we were getting divorced anyway.

So I tried to get her to explain, but she blocked me and when I tried to visit her at Cheryl's new address, my ex-wife told me that I wasn't welcome there. So in spite of having right to see my daughter, I wasn't able to even see her, much less speak to her, for almost a year. I thought about going back and fighting for her legally, but I didn't want to drag my daughter through another legal battle because the first time around it drained her enough emotionally.

So I accepted my fate, even though it sucked, and said nothing even though I was being deprived of any time with my daughter. But a couple of days ago, Jenny finally she said, showed up at my door with all her things and the first thing she did was give me a huge bear hug as soon as I opened the door. I didn't ask any questions and just let her come in because I was overjoyed to see her after one whole year of being away from my only daughter. She and I quietly sat down and then, after a while, she told me the truth about why she'd taken Cheryl's side in the divorce and stopped speaking to me despite knowing that her mother had cheated on me. So apparently my

ex-wife had told Cheryl that I was emotionally toxic and would often verbally attack her over small things whenever Jenny wasn't around. She painted me as a toxic, insecure, and generally an awful person who switched off that side of mind whenever Jenny would be around. To prove her point, she'd shown Jenny a chat where I was insisting that my wife wore a sweater to a work event but she didn't tell her the context behind it so it came off as controlling rather than me being concerned about what had happened. I told Cheryl to wear a sweater to wear a sweater. I told Cheryl to wear a because it was freezing and she'd worn a really flimsy and thin jacket that wouldn't keep her from feeling cold. But she had told Jenny that I'd said that to control her outfit to make sure

she didn't attract too much male attention. Then another screenshot of a chat where I was arguing with her about this one time that she'd flirted a little too much with a friend of mine, right in front of me. She insisted that she was just being friendly and that I'd misread the situation but I knew what I'd seen and I was very upset about it so I'd been very rude to her in the screenshot, which of course, Cheryl used to her advantage and made my daughter think that she was innocent and I was the one getting mad over nothing at all. There were several more chats that Cheryl had shown her completely out of context and no wonder after almost nine or ten of these.

Jenny was convinced that I was the guy who her mother told her I was and not the guy she'd known herself for 16 years so she took her mother's side in the divorce without even letting me have a chance to explain and tell her the truth. I was disappointed that she believed her mother but then again, she was just 16 and very impressionable. And even though she'd had a better relationship with me earlier, she'd had a good relationship with her mother too so I can't blame her entirely for believing whatever her mother told her. Especially when she had proof even if the proof happened to be very misleading texts, taken out of context, and of course she had a lot of things to say about me that weren't available in the form of texts either.

After telling Jenny all of this, she convinced her that she'd cheated on me just because I'd driven her to it. She'd had an affair with a coworker of hers and I'd caught her after almost seven months because she'd forgotten to take her phone when she went to use the toilet one day. That was the end of our marriage and even up until that point, Jenny was on my side but one day, Cheryl managed to talk her into believing this ugly side of me and that's what she used to turn her against me. She manipulated Jenny very cleverly and did everything out of court, never bringing up any of this while the lawyers were present because then she'd be caught and I'd know what she was up to. So she did everything behind my back and within a couple of days,

Jenny had turned over from my side to Cheryl's, which is how she got custody. She didn't even have to fight too hard for it because she'd already put in the work with Jenny and now my daughter herself didn't want to live with me anymore. So as much as I hate her, I have to hand it to her, she played it pretty cleverly. Unfortunately, after almost a year of not speaking to me, Jenny had finally caught on because she'd overheard Cheryl talking on the phone to her cousin who was going through a divorce and advising her to do something similar with her own kid to do the same thing that she'd done with Jenny.

It all clicked into place when she overheard that and then, that was it. She didn't even tell Cheryl before she came back home. She just left and only left a note saying that she was having a sleepover with a a friend so I wouldn't get into trouble over this. Once she told me all of this, I told her she was now going to be living with me and she seemed happy about it. She'd probably expected me to be mad about it because she'd just abandoned me without an explanation for almost a year, but I don't blame her, I blame the 42-year-old woman who took advantage of an emotional teenager's vulnerability. Even more so since she was having trouble processing her parents' divorce

that was it, I called my divorce attorney and told him whatever was going on. I didn't know what I could do to get back at her legally, but then he informed me that I could get her in trouble for intentional parental alienation and since I'd heard about it from the horse's mouth, it would be a lot easier to prove. We'd have to file for full custody and modify the already existing custody arrangement so Jenny could live with me now and this would be useful in that context. I told him to get started on the paperwork immediately and he did so. Once two days had passed, Jenny told me that she'd received several calls from her mother asking her where she was because she'd already made calls to her friend's house to ask about when the sleepover would end but she was not there. So now Cheryl was pissed and wanted an answer to her questions because she'd already guessed that she was probably with me. I decided that there was no point in

trying to hide it from her anymore since she'd hear from my attorney in a couple of days anyway. I called her up and told her that Jenny was now living with me and that I'd heard what she'd said to her to turn her against me. She tried to play innocent when I brought it up with her, but I was no fool. I reminded her of all the out-of-context screenshots she'd used to manipulate Jenny. I told her point-blank that I was going to make sure I got custody of Jenny now and she needed to watch out for another civil lawsuit coming her way, either slander or defamation because of the things she accused me of. I was mad and didn't think much before saying the things I was saying and then all of a sudden, Cheryl and I were screaming at each other because of what I'd said to her about another civil lawsuit. She was really pissed off because apparently, it was bad enough that I was trying to take her

away from her and that I had no right to sue her additionally either. It was ridiculous that she was complaining about it because, in my head, this was the least that I could do. I told her that it didn't matter what she felt about the situation. It was going to happen and I was going to make sure that she paid for all that she'd done to me. I hung up after that and didn't check my phone for hours since I didn't even feel like speaking to her or anyone else at that point. I went out on a walk afterward and left Jenny at home by herself for like half an hour while I walked around to cool off.

When I came back home, Cheryl was waiting in the living room for me and Jenny was sitting opposite her looking like she was going to cry. It was Jenny's expression that really set me off because I could tell that she'd been yelled at by Cheryl and after the things she'd done, she had no right to say a word to our daughter. I flipped out at her and we got into a huge screaming fight after I told Jenny to go back to her room so her mother and I could talk. The crazy part was that she wasn't even fighting with me over Jenny, she was fighting with me because she believed that a civil lawsuit was too excessive and that she couldn't afford this anymore. After some yelling, she'd be able to be. She'd

broke down and told me that she'd lost her job a couple of months back because she'd broken up with the guy she'd had that affair with and he told everyone about their affair which she'd managed to keep a secret for a really long time. So now she was in the middle of jobs, struggling with money and it was kind of a relief that Jenny had found out about the truth so she was going to come live with me because it just meant that she'd have to spend less on stuff. I was shocked that she was saying these things and that her money, her job, and stuff were more important to her than her own daughter. So after her mini meltdown, I sat back down with her and told her that she was the worst mother on this planet and that she deserved this lawsuit and

everything else coming her way after this. Then I asked her to leave and she did but since then she sent me a lot of texts saying that I'm being a total jerk for suing her over something so petty just for revenge. I don't think I'm being petty at all but I don't know. Maybe I should be a little less because honestly, I don't really need to go out of my way to hurt her. Jenny's going to live with me now and that's what I'd wanted all along but I also really want Cheryl to pay. So I'd have for suing my ex-wife now even though she's ready to give up our daughter's custody after she cheated and lied to our daughter about me? Update 1, hi, guys. So I'm not going ahead with the civil lawsuit. I did go through the comments and most people

didn't see anything wrong with what I was doing but to be honest, I think I want to get the custody case over with first before going out of my way to sue my ex-wife. Revenge shouldn't be my top priority right now, it should be my daughter's well-being and the less involvement I have with Cheryl in any capacity at all, the better off both of us will be. I told my attorney to call the slander lawsuit off but we're obviously still going ahead with the custody modification. She's already been served and we're meeting with a mediator in a couple of days. My daughter has already sent me all the proof I need to have, and when I asked her if she wanted her mother to have partial custody, she told me that she didn't and wanted me to have full custody

because after whatever had gone down with her mother the other day, she didn't even want to meet the woman. She apologized to me profusely for leaving me behind and never even bothering to give me an explanation for her behavior. Apparently, when Cheryl had come over the other day, she'd been nasty towards Jenny for moving to my place without even bothering to tell her mother about it. I'd come back home just ten minutes after her arrival and those ten minutes have been enough for Cheryl to give Jenny an earful about how ungrateful and selfish she'd been in this entire divorce and custody situation. She said that not only was she hurting her mother but she'd also hurt me first, which is true but like I said, it was mostly

Cheryl's fault. She just wanted to gaslight Jenny into believing that this was all so. She'd somehow her own fault because like always, she just didn't want to take the blame even if she was the one who had screwed up. And I'm still putting it here in a much more polite and respectful way, but Cheryl's way of speaking to Jenny had been far more brutal and cruel. I'd been married to the woman for a little over 20 years before this. I know how vicious she can get when she wants to, and it was surprising that she didn't even spare Jenny from facing that side of hers. I'm glad that our daughter came back to me because Cheryl's obviously a lot more interested in irrelevant crap than being a good mother. So be it then.

Update two so, there's been a really unexpected but unsurprising turn of events. Cheryl decided that she wanted to give up custody of her daughter altogether. It came as a surprise to me and my attorney and we had no idea what to do when we learned about this. I've got to say, I was shocked that she'd actually gone through with it. because so far, I'd always believe that she'd at least have a little love in her heart for Jenny. Not anymore, though. She wants nothing more than to just live on her own and save money. It's strange because I know she's in between jobs and stuff, but her getting laid off at one place doesn't mean she's never going to get a job again. This is just a temporary phase so I can't

figure out why she'd make such a permanent decision like terminating her parental rights altogether over a phase of her life. Hypothetically speaking, even if she just opted for visiting rights, then she still wouldn't have had to spend much on Jenny apart from one weekend or two at most. Not even that, perhaps, since Jenny has made it very obvious that she wants to live with me and not her mother. It's crazy how she's ready to just abandon her daughter and I have a nagging feeling that there's more to this situation than she's letting us in on. Cheryl worked in a very well-reputed firm and was a department head, so she got paid pretty well and three months without a job isn't enough to make her broke or whatever.

She used to be big on savings as well and unless she went out of her way to live a spentthrift lifestyle in the past year, she couldn't have possibly spent all her savings and run herself to the ground. It doesn't add up. And I know she maintained the same, normal standard of living after our divorce as well since Jenny has lived with her mother for a year and she confirmed that Cheryl didn't suddenly start living like a millionaire after the divorce. I have my doubts and theories but they're all unlikely. For now, I'm guessing that I just have to thank my lucky stars that I get to a full custody of Jenny without having to go through the trouble of yet another legal battle after last year.

I don't think any of us wanted it so in a way, this is good for us. Weird, sure, but okay. Update 3. Hey, everyone. So Cheryl signed away her rights today. It was emotional, tense, and really awful, but it's done now. Jenny's been upset the entire day, but there's not much we can do. Cheryl did hug and kiss her daughter on the forehead one last time before leaving, but it was the last time, foreseeably. I don't like Cheryl and I definitely don't trust her after all the things she's put this family through, but even then, she was a major and important part of this family for a really long time. And even though she did a lot of things wrong, it's hard to forget the good times.

I feel bad, as does my daughter, but we're there for each other and we're going to hope that we make it through these tough times together. I don't know what to say anymore because even though I'd been building it up in my head and preparing myself and Jenny for this day mentally for a while now, I didn't know just how hard it would hit us when it finally happened and was done with. It feels weird Jenny isn't going to be Cheryl's daughter anymore legally but well, that's how it is then. I don't know what to say or how to feel about all of this but my feelings come second right now. I'm mostly just worried about Jenny. She's too young and vulnerable to be going through all of this at her age. It just doesn't feel right to me.

Update 4. Hello, everybody. So I have big news for everyone who's been following our story. And by big news, I don't mean happy news. It's big in a way that makes you want to scream out of frustration. I met with a friend today who's Cheryl's second cousin. We didn't find out about the connection until after we started dating because Cheryl isn't very close to her family.

She was raised by her mother and this friend of mine was related to her on her dad's side who had passed away when she was seven. Anyway, we'd gone to high school together so that's how we were friends from even before I knew Cheryl. We met for lunch and I tried not to talk about Cheryl or Jenny or the situation between the three of us, but it just came up organically when my friend asked me how I'd been doing emotionally and I ended up telling him all about the kind of emotional whirlwind I'd been through in the past couple of weeks. I hadn't talked about these things in detail to any of my friends because it felt too personal and too upsetting to discuss. I'd talked about it with my parents

but everyone knows that's not the same as discussing it with a friend and my attorney. He's a friend but he's also a lawyer so it was hard to have a heart-to-heart talk with him about things like these without it turning into a discussion about our next step legally. So this was pretty much the first time I talked about this with a friend and God, I'm so lucky that I did. When I started telling him how Cheryl gave up custody of Jenny and signed her rights away because she'd lost her job and wanted to save money, he started looking really confused and I had to stop to ask him why.

So he told me that the reason he'd asked me how I was coping with the divorce was because he'd seen Cheryl's posts on her Facebook account where she was vacationing on some beach with her boyfriend. He figured that that's what I'd be talking about but I'd gone the other way and that's how we figured out that Cheryl had played me for a total fool. In all probability, she hadn't lost her job and neither had she been broken up with by her boyfriend. It was all just a really cheap, sickening and pathetic strategy to get me to take Jenny back so she could live a child free. I couldn't believe my eyes when my friend showed me posts of

her smiling and laughing happily with her boyfriend on a yacht, certainly not how a broke person in between jobs would be behaving. I couldn't have seen those posts by myself because I'm blocked and so is Jenny. And during the divorce, all our common friends had picked my side because duh, she'd cheated on me. So they didn't follow her either, but luckily, she'd forgotten to sever all her ties with me and her cousin was still on her friend list. I was disgusted when we figured out the truth because it was crazy to think that she'd gone to such an extent just so she wouldn't have to deal with Jenny's responsibility anymore. If that was the case, then she could have just told me about it and I would have gladly taken Jenny but no, she wanted to portray herself

as the victim and so she did something so low. I literally couldn't even bring myself to say anything after I saw that post of hers and my friend and I just sat in silence at our table for a while as I tried to process this. I tried to make up excuses for her in my head, but I just couldn't. I'd done enough of it for her in the last few months, but I just couldn't excuse this behavior, not after she voluntarily chose to hurt Jenny just so she could have her fun. I remember how emotionally devastated Jenny was the day she signed away her rights as a parent and as if that wasn't bad enough. Now I find out it was nothing

but a huge lie that she told us to cover for herself. I don't know what to do now, especially because I know I have to tell Jenny. I owe her the truth and I know it's going to break her heart but the girl needs to know. Update 5, I told my daughter about the truth just a couple of hours back. I'm surprised that she's dealing with it so well and it feels like she's grown up overnight. After I told her the truth, she just shrugged it off and said that it didn't matter to her anymore. She'd already cut herself off from her mother the day she left home to come back to me and apologize and the day Cheryl signed away her rights was pretty much the last straw for her. So now, it doesn't matter to her what she does and what lies she tells us. If she wanted to get rid of us

so badly, she should have just told us the truth. It's not like Jenny would have tried to force her way into Cheryl's life and neither would I have asked her for child support or anything. I earn well enough on my own and had been supporting our family for a really long time before Cheryl started working. So that's it, I guess. We're not going after her or anything, we're just letting this all go.