Reddit Stories - Betrayed_ ABANDONED by My Former Spouse While EXPECTING, MANIPULATED by Mother_
Episode Date: September 26, 2025#redditstories #askreddit #aita #betrayal #abandonment #manipulation #relationships #dramaSummary:A gripping tale unfolds of betrayal and abandonment by a former spouse while expecting, coupled with m...anipulation by a mother. Dive into the twists and turns of this emotional rollercoaster. Tags:redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, betrayal, abandonment, manipulation, relationships, dramaBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.
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I hope you enjoy this story.
Former spouse persuaded me to resign from my occupation before abandoning me while expecting a child,
and persuaded my mother to provide testimony against me in the legal system.
Many years later, my mother discovered that he had digitally altered photographs.
Fake evidence
I've had a really rough couple of years recently but I'm just managing to get back on my own two feet this year and it's been difficult,
especially since I don't have any support from anyone.
I blame my ex-husband for most of this because he's the one who pretty much ruined my life
and left me on my own about a year ago.
My ex-husband, Ezra and I had been together for two years before we got married.
We were married for three years before he decided to leave me last year, while I was in the
second trimester of my pregnancy.
Ezra and I met when we were 22, just starting out as a couple of new employees in the same
company.
We worked together for a few months before he finally asked me out, and then,
we started dating. While we were dating, everything was great, and soon enough, we decided to get
married. After that, everything started going wrong for me because I think knowing that I had a ring
on my finger now, and I was totally committed to him made him take me for granted. At first, he talked me
into quitting my job so I could stay at home full time and take care of the household. I was a little
skeptical about it initially, but then, I decided to go for it because my mother herself had been
a psalm and my dad had always treated her very respectfully. But unfortunately, I did not realize
that Ezra was nothing like my father and within half a year of me quitting my job, we started having
trouble with money. He and I used to work in sales, so it was all commission-based and I guess he was
not doing well. So I tried to talk to him about going back to work again since we were clearly
struggling with money, but he got really egoistic and accused me of not trusting him to be competent
and capable enough of managing the finances on his own. He told me to stick to my work around the
house and not worry about the money, and we started fighting about these things because I thought
that he was being very disrespectful towards me, especially given the fact that due to our
lifestyle, we had to rely on my savings way more than I would have liked to. But after every fight,
he would always apologize to me and emotionally manipulate me into forgiving him. I really loved
him and I wanted to make it work, so I would end up forgiving him in spite of myself. This ended up
turning into a cycle, he would disrespect me and then apologize to me and make it up to me and I would
end up staying. It was all very emotionally exhausting, but at the time, I still had this faith that I
could make it work with him. I put up with it for a really long time, but even that was not enough
for him to stay and he filed for a divorce eventually. And to make sure that he wouldn't have to
pay any alimony, he went above and beyond in his attempts to make me look like a cheater.
Last year, when I was around 10 weeks pregnant, my ex-boyfriend from high school reached out
to me and asked me to meet him for coffee. I don't think it would have been a big deal if we
had just been a short-term fling, but unfortunately, he and I had a really long history.
We had started dating when we were just 13 and he had my first and only serious boyfriend before I met
Ezra. My ex, I'll call him David, and I had been together for almost six years before we
mutually decided to break up in college. He had chosen to go to college out of state and we tried
to make it work long distance for a year, but it just wasn't going well and we started to have
a lot of misunderstandings. So instead of letting it drag on and end on a bad note, we decided to
end on a good note in mutually parted ways. After that, we tried to stay friends for a while but we just
drifted apart gradually. And after I met Ezra, nobody else stood the chance because I was
head over heels in love with him. Ezra knew about David and he had never had an issue with it,
so when I asked him if I could meet David for coffee since we hadn't seen each other for a really
long time, Ezra agreed to let me go without any complaints. I had gotten to know from a couple of
old friends that after he had graduated from college, David hadn't come back and had moved to
New Zealand to stay with his uncle and had been working there ever since. After that, he rarely
ever visited, and even when he would, he would only see his family and go back quickly.
So last year, he had taken a proper vacation to come back home and meet everyone and that's
why he had asked me to meet him as well, for old time's sake.
Ezra knew about all of this because I had even made him read the message that David had sent
to me, and it was purely platonic, there was nothing romantic about it at all. But in spite of that,
When he brought it up in court, he made it sound like I had always been in love with David and that
meeting at the coffee shop had been the first of many secret meetings. Even though it was the one and
only time that I had met him after our breakup. He didn't have any evidence. He just claimed that he had
seen me and David holding hands together but hadn't managed to get a picture because he was so
horrified and what was worse was that he managed to get a couple of our mutual friends to testify
against me too. However, what really sealed it for me was my mom's decision to believe Ezra and testify
against me. We had been having our usual fights while I was pregnant anyway, but as time went on,
the fights got worse because he started getting more agitated about the finances, and with a baby
on the way, I couldn't even blame him for it. So I tried my best to cut down on our expenses,
but even that would make him mad so I just decided to rely on my own savings without telling him
so he wouldn't get mad at me for questioning his competency to support us on his own.
But I guess none of that was enough because eventually,
he served me with divorce papers after one fight since I hadn't spoken to him for about a week,
but that was just because he had called me and our baby parasites
and I couldn't stand for it because he was the one who had made me quit my job
and told me that he would handle everything.
For me, I wasn't even mad about the fact that he had been calling me names,
but the fact that he had even dragged our unborn kid into it was unacceptable.
When he served me with the divorce papers, I was beyond shocked, and my first instinct was to
apologize to him, to beg him to stay but even after that for hours, it did not work and
he told me that he was going to leave that day itself and that he wanted nothing to do with me
or the child anymore. And true to his word, he packed his stuff and left and soon enough,
he sent me legal documents seeking to terminate his parental rights. A court hearing would be held
soon, and all I had to do was respond and attend. But that was only about the custody of our child,
the divorce was a whole mess that I still had to deal with. So I got in touch with a friend of
mine who works in a law firm and she put me in touch with one of their best divorce attorneys
and even paid for me since I could barely afford her. It took me a week to make up my mind
about what to do but eventually, I decided to go through with the divorce, but on my terms.
I had been very unhappy in this marriage anyway and realized that the only thing is the only thing
reason I had been begging him to stay was because that's just what I was used to, I was used to him,
but if I was getting the opportunity to start again, it would be foolish to let it go.
Especially given the fact that I was going to become a mother soon, I did not want to let my bad
decisions ruin my child's life. So I decided to agree to the divorce, but I wanted
alimony to be able to support myself, at least until I'd made enough money after I started working.
I thought that it was fair enough because Ezra himself had convinced me to quit my job earlier and
filed for a divorce now, it was on him to make sure that I was taken care of. That's where the
problem started because he was not willing to pay alimony at all and he started manipulating and
starting the fact to make me look like a flirt who would constantly hit on other people right in
front of him. And apparently I'd also been living off of his money for the past three years after
quitting my job on my own and expecting him to take care of everything. He even claimed that the baby
hadn't even been his idea, he had not been fine with it, but I had still gone ahead with the pregnancy
in spite of his protests.
So no, he did not think that he owed me any alimony
because it was the only way for me to get more money out of him
after he had completely drained his savings.
Which is what I had done and not him.
The only way he had drained his savings was while trying to impress people,
while I had actually drained my savings trying to support us without relying on him too much.
And then, of course, he started accusing me of having an affair with David
and said that he had personally seen us together but had apparently forgiven me
because he wanted to make it work, but now, he couldn't do that anymore.
Things got really messy and ugly, and I got my friends to testify for me by telling the
truth, but he got his friends to completely character assassinate me and make me out to be
some sort of gold-digging flirt. I even got David to testify and acknowledge that he had only
been here for about a month before he went back to New Zealand and he had only met me once,
but Ezra claimed that we were lying and I guess somehow. He even got to my mother ultimately.
The final nail in the coffin was my mother's decision to testify against me and claim that it was
totally believable that I was having an affair with David because I had always had a soft corner
for him and as far as she knew Ezra, he would never do anything to hurt me, so I was probably lying.
And when we finally wrapped up the entire thing, I did not get any alimony and my mother cut me off as well.
He also managed to get out of being a responsible father by terminating his rights, but I'm glad
that it happened because I wouldn't want somebody like him to be a part of my son's life.
anyway. At least I still get child support, no matter how small the amount is. After the divorce,
when I realized that I was not going to get any support, I decided not to waste any time crying
over spilled milk and started applying for jobs immediately. The divorce had been finalized a
month after my son was born and since I had been heavily pregnant while I was in the process
of getting divorced. Nobody was willing to hire me so I had been living with my friend who had
put me in touch with the lawyer and she had been kind enough to bear all my expenses too.
After I gave birth, I got a job within a month and I started working again.
It didn't pay much and I couldn't afford to move out of my friend's house for the first couple of months,
but eventually, once I had saved enough, I moved into a small apartment.
Everything has been a huge struggle for me but with a little help from my friends and a few family members,
I've been able to make it work while juggling work and motherhood.
I've always felt very guilty leaving my son with other people while I'm at work, but I know that I had to do it.
And to make up for that guilt, I decided to splurge on my son's first birthday party that's coming up in a week.
I've already sent out the invitations to all my friends, my family members who have been helping out, and a couple of my coworkers.
It's going to be a bit expensive, but I just got a new job two months ago and it pays much better, so I can afford to splurge a little.
Besides, I've already started repaying all my debts so I figured I could afford to spend a little on my son as well.
But somehow, my mother found out that I was throwing a birthday party for my son, and she was
really offended that she hadn't been invited, which I think is very surprising, given the
fact that she is the reason I'm having to struggle so hard to be able to give my son a good life.
She unblocked me on social media and reached out to me a few days back and did not even
bother to apologize to me.
She just started acting entitled right away and told me that she was very offended that
she hadn't been invited to my son's birthday party.
Even though she was the grandmother and probably the only grandparent in the picture since my
in-laws don't have any contact with me and my dad had passed away a few years back.
So, she went on to accuse me of alienating her grandchild from her and demanded that I invite her.
And she didn't stop demanding an invitation.
She said that now she wanted to be actively involved in her grandson's life,
and she wasn't going to tolerate my narcissistic and selfish behavior anymore.
I was shocked that she had the audacity to say something like that, especially after everything
that she had done. Not only did she make me lose out on the alimony with her testimony against me,
but she had been the one to cut me off and block me everywhere after Ezra manipulated her.
I'm not sure how somebody can get manipulated to testify against their own daughter, but well,
that's what happened and it clearly means that she doesn't love or trust me enough.
And I still remember that after her testimony, when I had reached out to her to confront her
and ask why on earth would she do something like that,
she had replied to me saying that she wanted nothing to do with me or my fatherless son
and that she did not owe me an explanation for what she had done
because I was a cheater and I had failed her.
After that, she had been the one to block me so I really think that she is the narcissistic
and selfish one here because she didn't even bother to apologize.
She just started making demands as if she was entitled to it.
So when I read that message from her, I lost my temper, and I replied immediately,
saying that I was not going to invite her to any event and she didn't deserve to be a part of my
life or my son's life anymore. She's a huge part of the reason why we had been struggling for the
past year and now, since she can't fix our life. She doesn't deserve to be a part of it either.
Then, I blocked her and I thought that would be the end, but now, she has started contacting
all my friends, family members who were close to me, and even a couple of my acquaintances from
school, to try and get me to talk to her again so she could explain why she had done what she did
in the past. She's been telling everyone that she wants me to know that she's sorry about how she
had treated me and she's even apologetic about her tone in the message that she sent me recently.
But she just needed one chance to talk to me and explain whatever was going on with her so I could
have all the facts and then make up my mind about whether I wanted her in my life or not.
But here's the thing, I don't even want to give her a chance to explain.
Whatever her reasons were, I don't want to hear it because in my opinion, no reason can ever be good enough to ruin my life as my mother and that's the fact of the matter.
I'm just kind of skeptical about telling people this because it might sound too cold-hearted so I just haven't been responding to anybody yet and I've been in two minds about what to say, so why did I for not wanting to hear my mother out about why she testified against me during my divorce?
Update 1, I have decided that I'm not going to change my mind.
I thought about it, long and hard, and I literally could not think of a single explanation that
she could give to me where I would feel like forgiving her.
Whatever she did, it was unforgivable and now I want nothing to do with her and that's
what I've told all my friends and family members who she has been reaching out to.
I told them that I really appreciated the fact that they passed on the message to me,
but I really want nothing to do with her, and if she contacts them again, I want them to
just block her because this is not something that they need to be involved and I don't understand
why she's been dragging them into it anyway. It's been a few days since then and my son's birthday is in
just two days, so that's what I'm focusing on. I've already made all the arrangements and stuff,
it's just some last-minute stuff, but I'm still trying to keep myself busy so that I don't have
to think about the situation with my mother. For a really long time, I've been suppressing all of this,
and I've been successful in doing so because I'm so busy all the time that I hardly have time to think about whatever has happened in my life.
I keep myself occupied and it's very easy to do that so that I don't have to think about all the things from last year and even from before that because it's not like Ezra and I was never problematic in the beginning.
We were always just wrong for each other. But now, because my mother had reached out to me, it became a little difficult for me to say none of that had ever happened and just keep moving on with my life.
I had allowed myself to get weak for a couple of days and let this take over my life, but I'm back to
normal now. I know that I have to power through all of this for my son and that's what I'm going to be
doing. I have no time for people like them. I know it's probably not a very healthy approach before
anybody decides to comment on it. I'm aware of it, but I can't really afford therapy right now,
not only financially but also I really just don't have the time for it. Maybe someday when I'll be
slightly more financially stable. I'll think about unpacking all of this with a professional,
but until then, I guess I'll just keep doing whatever has worked until now. But anyway,
all that aside, thank you so much to everybody who commented on my post with advice for me.
It was all really helpful and definitely made me feel much better. Update 2, hey, so my son's
birthday was almost two months ago, and back then, after I had told everybody that they should ignore
my mom's messages, everybody had done that and she hadn't talked to me after that. In the past year,
I had been quite busy so I hadn't been able to attend any family events either and everybody
could understand why so it's not like they took offense. But last week, I finally managed to
take some time off and attend my cousin's engagement party with my son. There, I finally met my mother
in person after more than a year and I was kind of taken aback to run into her but after they got
over my shop, I decided to just ignore her and get on with my day.
For the first hour, we did not speak to each other, but then, she came up to me and started
making small talk.
She seemed very happy to see my son as well and tried to interact with him, but he was really shy,
so he just kept hiding behind me.
Anyway, there were a lot of people at the party and I did not want to be rude to her and
throw a tantrum, so I decided to be polite to her.
I told her a bit about my job and my son and she told me that she would like to grab some
lunch with me soon if I would be open to that. Once again, she started telling me that
she had a lot to tell me about everything and that's when I decided to tell her that I was
glad that she was trying to make amends but I really didn't want that for myself right now.
I told her that the conversation was over and then I walked away and surprisingly, she was
respectful of it and did not bother me after that. And I've been thinking about it because I might not
forgive her even after hearing her out, but I really do want to know what she has to say.
I'm not doing this because I want to salvage our relationship or whatever.
I don't have any hopes like that, but it's purely out of curiosity that I want to meet her and hear her out.
I have been thinking about it ever since I met her, and I have even spoken to a couple of friends about it.
They think that if I want to get an explanation and maybe get some closure, then I definitely should talk to her because it'll probably help me.
So after giving it a lot of thought, I decided to reach out to her after unblocking her yesterday and I told her that I would like to grab lunch.
with her today. I'm not taking my son with me because I'm not sure if I want to forgive her or not,
and if I don't, I don't want her to get attached or whatever. Update three, so I came back from
lunch with my mom about two hours ago and, boy, there's a lot to unpack here.
As soon as I got to the restaurant, she started thanking me for even showing up, and once we had
ordered some food, she did not waste any time beating about the bush and immediately started telling
me the last year. Ezra had visited her and shown her a lot of screenings.
and pictures and totally convinced her that I had been cheating on him with David.
He had even gone to the extent of showing her a screenshot from David,
where he was bragging about how the two of us were going to take his money and go off to live
together. He had told my mother that he hadn't presented any of this to his lawyer
because he did not want to humiliate me even more since he still loved me,
but I think the real reason he did not bring any of that up was probably because all of that
was made up, photoshopped and fully fake. It had been just enough to convince my mother
because she didn't have any other way to confirm the truth,
and it had probably seemed real to her the experts would have found out the truth.
Anyway, that's how he got her to testify against me and she had been very upset with me,
but when she heard about her grandson's first birthday,
she felt even more upset because not only was she losing out on time with me since I was a cheater.
She was losing out on time with him too just because of my mistakes,
and that's why she had been so entitled while messaging me first.
But after the message that I had sent back to her,
she started doubting herself and that's when she reached out to David to ask him if he had sent
any message to Ezra and he showed her proof that he had never even spoken to Ezra.
That made her realize that maybe Ezra had lied to her, so she tried to contact him and when
he hung up on her as soon as she asked him about it, she realized what a huge mistake she had made.
So she tried to get everybody to talk to me and get me to unblock her but by then, it was too
late, and I had decided that I did not want to forgive her or even hear her out.
She could totally understand why I did not want to give her a chance because she told me that if she had been in my place,
she probably wouldn't have wanted to hear me out either because this was a huge betrayal, so she did not bother me further.
She had been trying to be respectful of my boundaries, but she knew that she wanted me to know the truth about what had happened because now,
she felt like she could finally help me out and maybe we go back to court again and get Ezra to pay the alimony that he owed me.
since the only way he got out of it the first time was by accusing me of cheating and lying about
everything. So we definitely had grounds to ask for alimony now and with her help, she believed that
we could get it done. It was a lot to process and I didn't know how to feel about any of it,
so I just told her that I needed some time to think things over and that's what I'm going to be
doing now because all of this has been heavy and I feel really weird right now.
I don't know if I want to forgive her, I don't know if I even can because I've gotten used to being
mad at her. I'm trying to understand her point of view as well, but it's difficult. I don't know if I should
go back to court and demand alimony again if there's even any point to it anymore and I just don't
have any answers for anything right now. I guess I'll have to take my time and think about everything
before I do something. Update 4. Hey, guys. So, it's been close to six months since my last update,
and here's the deal. I decided to go back to court to enforce alimony payments and we went through
the whole negotiations and stuff again, but this time, my mother was on my side. And I even
reached out to all his friends who had testified against me the first time around. He had
manipulated them the first time, so I decided to do the same thing and I played the most
emotional card I could think of the I'm a struggling single mother all because of you guys' card.
Technically, I wouldn't even call it a card that I paid because it was just the truth that I used against
them. And I guess a lot of them were already feeling quite guilty for testifying against me and
they were ready to testify in my favor this time with the truth. When I told Ezra about it,
I said that I was willing to give him a chance to settle out of court as long as he coughed up the
money that he owed me and I guess he knew that there was no way out of it anymore. So he decided
to agree and now, I'm going to be receiving checks every month until I decide to remarry.
And if I wanted to get back at him, I would have decided not to marry ever again but I don't
think I'm going to do that because I have recently started talking to David again. He reached out
to me recently to apologize for not telling me about it when my mother had contacted him to
ask about whether he had ever spoken to Ezra, back when she was trying to confirm if Ezra had
lied to her or not. He told me that he had wanted to bring it up with me, but at the time,
we hadn't been on talking terms because of the divorce and everything and it was just awkward.
He reached out to me back then and since then, we've just never stopped talking. We are still
figuring things out, but I have started developing feelings for him again and he has confessed that
he never really fell out of love with me anyway, which is why he hasn't been able to get serious with
anyone. He lives in New Zealand and keeps trying to get me to visit him, and I might do that soon.
My mother and I are also working things out and it's going well so far. Honestly, I'm just
figuring things out for myself at the moment and I'm not too sure about anything but I know that I'm
loved, and that's all that matters. But my priority right now is my son, and that'll always be
true, no matter what happens.
