Reddit Stories - BETRAYED by the MATERNAL Mask_ UNVEILING the Dark Side of My Second Mother_

Episode Date: June 10, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #familydrama #betrayal #relationships #darkside #secondmotherSummary: A gripping tale of betrayal unfolds as the true nature of a second mother is revealed, shedding light on hidden darkness within family dynamics. Emotions run high as trust is shattered, leaving the protagonist to navigate complex relationships and confront painful truths.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, familydrama, betrayal, relationships, darkside, secondmother, trustissues, familysecrets, emotionaljourney, confrontingthepast, personalgrowth, difficultchoices, hiddentruths, complexrelationships, navigatingemotions, confrontingbetrayalBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I labeled my second mother as harmful after she yelled at me and my sibling in her residence, and subsequently my father informed me that I cannot utilize that vocabulary despite her actions. Her own parents toxic. I, 20M, and my brother, 16M, let's call him Nick, live with our dad, 47M, and his wife, 46F, Agatha. We moved in together in late 2022, and they got married in early 2023. Since moving in, our relationship with Agatha has been tense. She expects us to contribute to the household through chores, which is fair, except her contributions are sporadic and sometimes non-existent.

Her reasoning is that she works full-time and pays for the mortgage, but my dad pays the other half and still does more around the house than she does. Also she's been unemployed for almost a year, she's has been dealing with her ailing mother and selling her old apartment, and has had way more free time than anyone else. in the house lately. She does help out sometimes, but mostly when it involves her own interests, like redecorating or spontaneous, rage-fuelled cleaning binges. Something important to note, Agatha has mentioned she likely has bipolar disorder and is seeing a therapist, I don't know for what specifically. She has a very short fuse, and if she's already in a mood, any mess sets her off.

It's not uncommon to get texts like clean this fucking kitchen. I understand anger, but whenever I try to talk about where it's coming from, the response is basically, she just doesn't like being reminded that other people live in her house. She's implied multiple times she that she got married under the understanding that Nick and I would move out soon, and that we basically self-manage and not make mess, even though she's just as messy as the rest of us. No one brings this up because she's honestly scary. Anyway, here's the recent incident. I just got back from visiting my partner's family over. and immediately started law school two days later and resumed my bar job, so I've been flat out. But I negotiated a chore schedule that works, and things had been okay. Today, while on a break from a major assignment, I went to make lunch and saw that Nick had already cooked and left

stuff out. Normally I'd ask him to clean it, but I was in a rush and decided to just use what was already out. My dad came down, saw the mess, and asked me to clean up. I said, I would after eating, since I might cook more. After I finished, I cleaned up about half the kitchen, including food and mess from my dad, wiped benches, and told my brother his half was still there to clean. Then I went back to my room to study. Two minutes later, I get a text from my dad and our family group chat, at Op Kitchen. I was totally confused, I just cleaned more than half. I figured either, one, dad asked Nick about the mess, and Nick blamed me. Two, Dad saw it still messy and assumed I bailed before finishing. I replied that I'd cleaned

half and asked what Nick had said. My dad didn't answer the question, just said the kitchen needs to be cleaned. I repeated myself, again, no response to my question, just talked to your brother. So I did. Turns out Agatha had come into the kitchen after I left, yelled at Nick about the mess, and then my dad messaged me. I went to clarify with him. He and Agatha were already prepared for a discussion and called Nick over two. I asked if I'd be allowed to explain uninterrupted, they both said yes. My dad gave a whole speech about how important it is that the kitchen stays clean and how tired they are of reminding us. I listened quietly. When he was done, I said I understood and asked again to speak uninterrupted. About a minute into explaining my

side, how I followed his instruction and cleaned my half, and then Agatha started interrupting. Then she snapped. She said she didn't need to hear the whole story, that I was still wrong, and started yelling at both of us. I asked her to let me finish, and she screamed, No. It's my house. You do what I say. I broke. I started crying, full on sobbing, but she kept screaming about the mess, about how sick she

was of all of it. My dad eventually told her what she was doing wasn't okay and that he didn't like her shouting at his kids. She kept going. And I snapped. Through the tears, I said, are you hearing yourself? You are toxic. Yeah.

She went full on thermonuclear. I walked away, realizing I may have just gotten myself kicked out. As I went downstairs, I heard them yelling, not uncommon, but this time it was about me. I heard my dad shout, he lives here too. I heard her shout, well then he can get out. I stayed crying in my room for 20 minutes. My dad came down and tried to talk to me about how I can't call her toxic because it's therapist language and it hurts her. I get that. She's called her own parents toxic before,

so hearing it turned on her probably hit a nerve. But I said what I said because I meant it. She acts like she deserves total respect and authority, but behaves like a child. She demands cleanliness, but makes months-long messes. She screams at us, but won't hear a word in return. She's always right, always the victim, and everyone else is the problem. She's harming me, and more importantly, my younger brother. We're both going to need therapy after this. I don't feel safe or comfortable in my own home. I'm constantly bracing to be screamed at for something minor that sets her off.

And when she tries to be nice, it's so forced and uncomfortable, like a smiling snake asking for a hug. She makes promises to win us over, then rarely follows through. Update 1, March 29th, 2025. So, yesterday after I posted to Reddit, my brother, my father, and I went grocery shopping, sort of just to get out of the house. While we were out I expressed how I was feeling to him. The fact that if I was in his position the relationship would be over. He basically just said he was trusting her to change, and that he had seen her change.

I personally haven't seen any change. What I've seen is her becoming more and more reclusive, being less involved with our lives, and our relationship with her becoming more tense as a result. Late last night, after venting to my partner about the whole situation on the phone and reading some really kind and insightful replies, I was literally crying while reading them. Thank you. I locked and barricaded my door before going to sleep. I just didn't feel safe to say. sleep in an unlocked room. This morning my dad knocked on my door, I removed the stuff from behind it and we had a quick chat. It was brief, but dense, so I'll try to summarize. Apparently she wasn't home last night and she's going out tonight. I told him that what she did yesterday was abuse and I

refused to have it happen again. Dad said that he would face her with an ultimatum. Change or they're done, I told him that only thing that was guaranteed is the abuse and pain that's already happened, and will likely continue. This isn't the first time she's been asked to change, I told him that my brother and I have already been hurt, and that will need therapy because of this. He acknowledged that and said maybe it will be best if they just live separate for the next few years, with us living with him until we move out. I said I thought this is a good idea, he admitted that she doesn't want a relationship with us, she only tries as he wants her to. I said that when my brother and I move out, his relationship with us will be worse because of the way she isolates

him. He said that the reason she is such a hard time with us is because she hates having to ask us to clean and do our chores. I said, sure, but she's not the victim here, she lives surrounded by her own mess all the time, and we don't say anything, let alone yell or scream, I said very clearly, that we don't feel safe or comfortable in our own home. What she is doing is abuse and emotional manipulation. It's not okay. The fact that it's happened at all should be the end of it. The fact that we're still here trying to make it work is a problem. Will being having a sit down, just the three of us, without her, after I get home from work tonight. I don't think I would have had the courage to do this without the support I received from the comments. You guys

helped me realize that this isn't okay, and I can't keep accepting it, for me, for my brother, and for my father. So thank you, so much, the support has been really invaluable. Update 2, March 30th, 2025. So, after I got home from work, the three of us, my dad, my brother and I, met in the kitchen to talk. It turns out my dad had tried talking to Agatha about what I'd said to him earlier today, and even said that she was being emotionally abusive directly to her, and she told him she would never forgive him for saying that. I wasn't there to hear it, but my brother told me there was a lot of shouting followed by her packing her bags and going to stay with a friend for the

night. The conversation with my dad and brother went on for hours, as I write this, it's been more than three hours after I got home and we only just finished less than half an hour ago. I started by being very firm and reiterating the fact that what she did yesterday was extremely abusive, and it's certainly not the first time this has happened, and it's likely not the last. I said that, it shouldn't matter what the circumstances are, screaming at us to inflict pain should never be an option. My dad immediately went to using the argument that I've heard from her so many times to justify her being abusive in her relationship with my brother and I, that when the chores don't get done, she gets really angry. I said that I understand the anger, but she's an adult,

she needs to manage that and engage in discussion with us rather than just yell at us and refuse to listen to any explanations. Yesterday, we had done what we had been told, and when I tried explaining the confusion, she screamed at me until I cried, and then kept going. I said very clearly, us forgetting to do some chores, and her abusing us are not on the same level. He said, well, you say that. I almost broke down again.

Like seriously, if a little messes, causes a meltdown, maybe she shouldn't be living in a house with two people with diagnosed ADHD, near constant remodeling and modifications, and two large, messy dogs. Not to mention that she herself is far from perfect. I said that it is not okay that she'll just imply eviction to keep us in line. She'll say things like, you better unpack that dishwasher. I pay for the roof over your head, you need to pull your own fucking weight in this house if you want to live here. She said this to my 16-year-old brother over dishes. There was a lot of back and forth about this thing of us provoking her.

Eventually I used an analogy to try and explain it. If someone is in an aquarium with a shark, and they cut themselves, accidentally or not, and the shark enters a frenzy and attacks, the question shouldn't be, why weren't they more careful? There's a shark in there, it should be, who the fuck put that person in the tank with a shark? I think they got through to him. He asked me what I expected him to do, they're married, he can't just leave, and I asked, why not? What would need to happen for you to get us and yourself out of here? Physical abuse.

One of us getting pushed down the stairs. Because that's the way it's going. After that thing shifted a little. It became much less oppositional discussion as he came to the realization of what had to happen. He did say that the four of us, including Agatha, would need to sit down and talk about what needs to be done. I don't really want to do this, and I'm honestly scared about seeing her again. The last time I stood up to her she didn't speak to me for a week and she used this glare that made me feel uncomfortable in my own skin. She only started talking to me again after I foolishly apologize to keep the peace.

I feel quite sad for my dad, at this point he's barreling towards a second divorce. and his children are being abused by the person he loves. It's a tough situation for him to be in, but I have to ask how he didn't see it coming. The conversation ended with hugs, and my dad went upstairs to go to sleep. My brother and I kept talking, and eventually we started talking about how things were going with his girlfriend. He made a joke, and we laughed, maybe a little too loud. And I looked at the stairs almost out of instinct, expecting her to come down and yell

him to clean the kitchen and go to bed, I realized I don't have to worry about that right now. I really hope I never have to worry about that again. Again, thank you so much for the support. I'm not one to advocate so hard for myself, maybe one of those issues for therapy, but you helped me realize that I don't owe her endless chances to change, and the support from you guys has given me the strength not to back down again. So really thank you. And if something happens I'll be sure to update you.

Next story, woke up to my GF giving me a BLWJB without my consent and I slapped her as a trauma response because my egg donor ML stead me as a child and my girlfriend refused to apologize. I feel horrible for what I did. How do I even start this? Let me just start by saying that I would never slap her intentionally, let alone hurt her in any way. My girlfriend has a very high sex drive unlike me and therefore she is the one to initiate sex most. of the time. It took me a few years to fully trust her, but she was such a loving and caring person who understood my trauma and was always able to control herself even with her high-sex drive. When I was a child I was sexually molested by my own egg donor. I remember how she

covered my mouth with her hand while holding me down and I tried to scream and defend myself. But I was just a little boy and she was a grown woman. I wouldn't call her mother because that's not what mothers do. This traumatized me and it destroyed every relationship I tried to build with a woman. It was hard for me to trust one until my girlfriend appeared. And she always respected my consent so far. Yesterday evening she wanted to have sex and I told her I wasn't in the mood right now and then I turned around. I woke up in the middle of the night to my blanket gone and her doing oral sex. My heart started beating really fast. All the anxiety I I felt as a child came back and before I realized I slapped her so hard she fell off my side of the

bed. I immediately realized what I just did. The only thing I thought about was that I slapped her. She held her cheek while looking at me with a shocked face before starting to cry. I wanted to comfort her and apologize, but she ran out of the room into the bathroom where she cried her eyes out and then she went to sleep on the couch. I apologized repeatedly, but she refuses to talk to me. I feel so bad. I know I am a horrible person and there is no excuse for this. But what can I do so that she speaks to me again? Is there anything I can do so she forgives me?

Update 1. When I made the original post I definitely didn't thought it would blow up like this. And I certainly didn't expect the comments to be so one-sided. And I didn't expect them to be on my side. I expected nothing but people telling me how horrible I was. and I felt that this would be the only comment I deserved. But after reading literally thousands of comments, I slowly began to realize what actually happened there.

You have to understand that this moment shocked me to the core and this shock still was there when I uploaded the original post. I saw myself as the absolutely disgusting women beater because of it. I never wanted to hurt anyone, but I realized now that it was a trauma response. When I woke up to her going down on me, it felt like my whole body was controlled by someone else. Like I was controlled by strings that forced me to react like that.

And the more comments I read the more I was sure about that. One day after the post, after thousands of comments from Reddit and many DMs I talked to her about it and I broke up with her. Because all of this made me realize that my perspective of loving and caring was pretty effed up. I realized that she showed me the bare minimum of compassion someone should have in a relationship and I noticed many toxic patterns I haven't realized before. But going into them now would not only be irrelevant to the actual topic, but it also would take way to long for this update post. BTW.

She refused to apologize to me and demanded an apology from me. Besides my now ex-girlfriend I only had one friend. I don't have an actual mother or a father. I don't have grandparents or siblings. Just this one friend. So I really lack of healthy bonds in my life. Breaking up with her was a hard thing to do but it was necessary.