Reddit Stories - Close COMPANION REQUESTED my presence to SUPERVISE at her child's marriage ceremony as

Episode Date: May 13, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #wedding #family #supervision #ceremony #relationships  Summary: A close companion requested my presence to supervise at her child's marriage ceremony. I felt honored yet apprehensive about the responsibilities involved. Balancing friendship and duty proved challenging, leading to unexpected moments of joy and stress throughout the event. Ultimately, it was a memorable experience for everyone involved.  Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, weddingplanning, familydynamics, eventsupervision, friendships, marriageceremony, socialresponsibility, lifeevents, personalstories, relationshipadvice, emotionalsupport, community, celebrations, parenting, eventmanagement, storytellingBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

I hope you enjoy this story. Close companion requested my presence to supervise at her child's marriage ceremony as my mobility aid and respiratory device might disrupt the images. Consequently, a group of 80 individuals celebrated in my absence, and now they are holding me accountable for the situation. I was so happy to see a wedding invitation in my mailbox. I pulled it out and a little note fell out on an index card, but I looked at the invitation first. It was truly beautiful and I immediately stuck it to my fridge like the work of art it was.

It was addressed to my husband and me and I was beyond stoked. I love weddings. I tend to get teary-eyed and smile until my face hurts at the joy of new beginnings and all the love. I was even a wedding singer, that's how much I love them. I picked up the note card and read that and while my husband was invited, I'd be in another room helping to babysit all the children there with several other female invitees. There's a special room for children at the church and that's where I'd be. For everything. I'd still need to dress for a wedding in case I wind up in any photos, but I'd be taking my reception meal with the children and I'd be with all the kids for the ceremony. Then there was a link for their gift registry. Oh, and the meals for my husband and myself would be

$100 each and we have a link to pay it when we digitally are SVP. The first problem here is that I am disabled at 50 years old. Legally. I use oxygen. I use a walker when I need to walk long distances. I sometimes have to give up the walker entirely and use a wheelchair. I'm not proud of it, but there it is. I could happily sit in a room and look at kids, but I'd be pretty useless to prevent

fall or stop a child from choking or anything else that would require me to move quickly. Second, my husband isn't the one who has been friends with these people since childhood. I am. Why would he be invited to watch the ceremony and be part of the reception but not me? My husband said he'd happily watched the kids and let me attend the wedding and reception but the invitation specified that only other female invitees would be watching the kids so I doubt they'd let him. Is this a normal thing at weddings now?

Do you pick guests to babysit other guests' children? Should I call them up and explain my health situation even though they already know it and visit me during my multiple hospitalizations a year? I hate having to pull the health card but honestly, what were they thinking? I confess that I feel offended and hurt that I'm nothing more than a babysitter to them who is expected to pay for my supper and babysit for free. Would I be wrong to simply tell them we won't be able to attend and to find another sitter? And if we don't go, do we still send a gift?

Updating to address some questions. I know these folks because my mom, R-I-P-mom, and the bride's grandma were besties. So, I grew up with the bride's mom as an almost sister to me. We went to school together, graduated together, worked at the same place twice, and had been super close since. The bride is like a goddaughter. At least I thought she was. I'm gobsmacked here.

The church where they are getting married is a Southern Baptist church. They aren't members. None of us are overly religious. They just like the venue and booked it. I've never been inside, but it's lovely on the outside and apparently, it has a child care room that is big enough for a bunch of women and kids to hole up comfortably for a wedding and reception. We're all American. The groom's family is related to my family via marriage and the bride and groom met at my house

at a cookout a few years ago. I've always been way closer to the bride's family, though. I knew that there had been a proposal. I got face-timed about 10 minutes after it happened and my husband and I cried and laughed and wished them well and ooed and awed over their story in the ring. I was expecting an invitation, sure, but not like this. The last time I had lunch with the bride's mom, she told me they're inviting around 200 people so it'll be a large wedding with, I'm assuming, a ton of children. No, I don't hate kids. I love kids. I would have loved to have kids of my own but my body just

wouldn't do it. It took two miscarriages and a stillbirth to finally make me accept that it wouldn't happen for us. We are in the process of adult adopting two young adults that we brought into our home when we found out they were kicked out and homeless at 18. They've lived with us for years and we're making it legal. They call us mom and pop and we're a family. I'm still considering my options. I've started and deleted multiple emails to the bride's mom. I'm a raw nerve right now and my tone isn't the kindest. I want to keep it all in writing so there can be no he said slash she said. I plan to ask if they incorrectly sent me the note about babysitting since they know I physically cannot do that. But every inception of the email led with oof, Donna? So, I need to think

about it some more. Smile, thanks for all the comments. I'm reading them all. Comment where op has replied, K-colon, I'm not proud of it, but there it is. Sorry to not reply to your initial question, but this comment caught my attention. I just wanted to let you know that you should actually be very proud of yourself and your body for pushing through and using the equipment that is needed to support your body well. Oop, thank you. So much. I never expected this to be my reality at 50 years old.

Never. I went from being so healthy and doing all kinds of sports, I rocked roller derby, and could swim like a fish. And love to play tennis, to this. And sometimes I feel like it's not even my own. own body I'm living in anymore. It's just not okay. Therapy is helping me accept it, but it's an uphill battle that I feel like I can't win. So, thank you. From the bottom of my heart. Thank you. Update 1. I spoke to my friend, the mother of the bride, and I'm pretty upset. I've been bawling for most of the day. She called and said that they were getting a lot of backlash from the wedding guests.

No one wants to pay $100 for dinner and only three of the women asked were okay with babysitting. I told her I understood that the guests were upset because it's just tacky to one, be asked to pay and two, be told you are invited but only to babysit. I told her I would not be a babysitter at all. No. Just no. She got mad and brought up how we were lifelong friends. She said I'd be helping them more by babysitting than I'd be helping by.

simply sitting in a pew watching. I reminded her that I couldn't physically help at all due to, you know, being legally disabled. She said they completely understood that and expected me to simply supervise the other sitters since they trusted me most. Again, I told her that I felt it was insulting to be vol untold. Thanks, read it for that word, that I'd be babysitting and that I had no desire to do that, especially not dressed in formal wear. Then we got to the truth. She said, She said that she didn't know if I'd be in a wheelchair that day or require a walker. That's fair. I don't always know which one I'll need. She said that they wanted everyone in pews for the wedding video and me sitting in a wheelchair would make me stick out and ruin

video slash photos. I said, if I need a wheelchair that day then I can move to a pew and my husband can put the wheelchair in another room or back in our car. I may not even need it that day. Then she says, well, space is limited in the pews. You would take up the space of two people with your purse and oxygen tank, I said, no, I would not. I wouldn't bring a purse in and the oxygen tank either sits on my lap or between my feet. It's like a little backpack. Then she said, well, having you in oxygen in the photos would be distracting from the other people.

And there you have it. Words were exchanged and she hung up on me. I haven't been removed from any social media yet, but I fully expect to be. I already feel awful for being this way at only 50 years old. I didn't choose this. I didn't want this. If she thinks it's awful to having it photographed, just imagine living with it. Which is what I told her before she hung up on me.

I'm devastated. Just devastated. Update 2. I'm not in the greatest headspace. I don't think I've ever been less okay. honestly. I did not register to RSVP or communicate with them further. Until, another invitee got in touch with me and said that the mother of the bride, a person I thought of as basically my sister, was bad-mouthing me into the ground. I explained my side and our mutual friend was livid.

They told the mother of the bride and the bride that they were wrong to want to exclude me because I might or might not need a wheelchair and would have oxygen on my face. I could remove the oxygen for photos, they told me. her. So, the mother of the bride sent me a message saying, and I quote, well, if you're going to be but heard about the aesthetic we want to achieve and try to turn other guests against us then you can fucking come and sit in a pew. But not in photos. And we'll try to get the videographer to do edits to the wedding vid, too. But I won't forget how you made this difficult for us. I replied, how did I make it difficult other than existing? She replied, you clearly told

about what I told you regarding your wheelchair and oxygen. And she's telling everyone else. We're getting a ton of hate, I said. She asked me if I was attending and I told her no and explained why. I didn't lie to her. I told her exactly what you said. You didn't tell me not to tell anyone your reasons. If there are valid reasons to you, then you shouldn't care who knows. So, I'm now blocked by the bride, the mom, the dad, and the groom. A friendship I've had my entire life is over. A goddaughter that I help nurture and care for is just gone now. We paid for the bride's car insurance, gas, and cell phone all through high school and college because we wanted her focused on just her studies and not a part-time job. Her parents got her a car but insisted she

worked but her grades fell when she did and we helped her. And this is how they thank us. This how they repay our kindness. I guess I'm a great friend when I'm giving money, but I'm not good enough to be seen. I've felt like a burden my whole life and this has set me back so far. I'm just not okay. Update 3, apparently, my post went sort of viral because it was on Fox News and a site called Bored Panda. A few mutual friends reached out and asked if it was me and I admitted that it was. They were told something completely different about the situation. mother told them that I refused to come because of my health difficulties and that I was afraid I would ruin the wedding and decline the RSVP. She even claimed that she had been begging me to attend

ever since the engagement happened which was a bold-faced lie. I am the one who organized and paid for the after-engagement party so they could announce the happy news to everyone and I was clear to everyone that I couldn't wait to attend the wedding. So, I sent screenshots, photos of the invitation, and the note card telling me I'd be babysitting, and then the showdown where I was told I could sit in the pew and just be edited out of the video and would not be in any photos. I also posted it on Facebook and shared receipts there, too. Well, World War III has officially commenced. Granted, I'm getting this all third and fourth hand, but here's the latest. Word has spread fast. Links to the news article have made it all over the place and I've been told that the few ladies

who had agreed to babysit have backed out and asked if there was something wrong with them that would make them not fit to sit in the pews or be in photos. And I think that's probably the case since two of them have unnatural hair coloring and the other has facial piercings. The church that was booked as the venue has been notified and I'm hearing it's probably not going to happen there because the pastor's daughter is wheelchair bound after a car accident. He was going to officiate but now he says he's conflicted about it and the message it would send. My ex-friend and the bride have blown up my husband's phone because I blocked them after this went public. They blocked me first on all of the social media spots and he let it go on for a few days to see what they had to say. He has blocked

them but the bulk of it is that I'm jealous that I was never blessed with any children of my own so that's why I'm ruining this for them. I'm hateful and vile and vindictive because I hate them for their clear health. I mentioned that the groom is related to me by marriage, right? That whole branch of the family tree has now divided itself with some on my side and some on the bride's side. The groom hasn't contacted us at all but his mother did and told us. me that I was wrong for sharing personal business and that I need to let the bride of her wedding how she wants it. I don't agree that I did anything wrong here. I can't help that I'm sick. They've made me feel like utter trash that should just be tossed into the landfill. I hurt.

I literally ache because of this. So, hi Donna, my ex-best friend and practical sister. If you're reading this, you devastated me. I'm not okay. I don't know that I'll ever be okay again. I invested time and money into both you and your daughter. I gave you both a home when your marriage was messed up and never charged you rent or asked for help with groceries or utilities. For over a year, you lived in our home and we paid your way so you are wrong to treat me this way. My oxygen mask and possible need for a wheelchair should be the last thing on either of your minds, because what matters most is that I, feeling as bad as I normally do, was still going to put on my best dress, make myself look presentable, plant a smile on my face

through my pain, and show up for you like I always have. But I never, ever will again. If people noticed me in your photos at all, it would have been because I had the biggest and most proud of anyone there and they'd see the love I had for you radiating off the image. You will regret this one day when I'm gone and you realize that there are more important things in life than a perfect photo. Update for the wedding was today, November 16th, 2024. Friends rented a big cabin venue about 20 minutes from the wedding venue and everyone who was offended over being asked to pay at the reception and babysit or serve the food. Yes, several people got invitations telling them they were invited, but would be serving food at the reception they paid to eat at. Got together at the cabin. Me included. I was on the fence about going because I really didn't want to sit there and talk about every

and rehash it, but that wasn't my experience at all. I had a truly lovely time. My husband and I even danced to our wedding song. And I had mixed drinks. Quite a few so forgive me if this is typos. L.O.L. Two of the bridesmaids opted out of the wedding over mistreatment and, without anyone knowing, they sent letters to all the guests who had been invited to tell them what went down with me and others being asked to babysit slash be servers. Those guests were given the address of the cabin. They were the two bridesmaids who addressed all the envelopes and still had the guest list from what they told me. Anyway, we had a great time. There were about 80 of us before all was said and done, though I didn't take a head count. It was packed. Several people

went to the wedding but didn't attend the reception. They refused to pay for their meal and came to our get-together instead, including the two bridesmaids who told me all about what I was being called and the story of how I was trying to ruin their wedding because I was jealous of their good health. The bridesmaids who backed out of the wedding due to Bridezilla behavior were posting a ton of picks of all of us dancing and eating. We all chipped in dollar weeks ago for catering and booze and was seen by my ex-bestie because she unblocked me. I unblocked her weeks ago in the hope that she'd come around, much as I'm loath to admit it, and called me to tell me off again. I told her I didn't plan the alternate reception but I was invited and came because they didn't care

about my health or me ruining any photos, just me having a good time. Apparently, the wedding was ruined because of me. They had invited hundreds of people and the church wasn't even halfway full. And the reception had less than 30 people, so that's $3,000 the guests paid. When the food and liquor cost around $15,000 and it's my fault they're eating that cost now. They likened me to the Antichrist and the devil and claimed I had to be possessed to do this to a young girl and the groom, when he's a member of my family. I said, I didn't do anything. I told the truth and if the truth hurts you then maybe you were wrong to do it. Did you consider that? She hung up on me and started calling others and demanding the address so they could come to the actual reception.

No one gave it to her. I just got home at 11 p.m. It was a great day. I laughed. I even felt up to dancing a little. I had good news. I don't need my awkward. all the time now and just at night via CPAP or after exercise and I have been going to the pool and doing senior aquatics as much as I can, and it's helped so much with my breathing and my mobility. I can walk around the whole grocery store now without needing to sit down on my walker. I still use the walker for long periods due to dizziness from Meniere's disease, but I think I'm doing better. At least, I'm trying. I feel very proud of myself, friends, anyway. The wedding still happened but they didn't have the numbers they expected and I've heard that someone suggested they

donate the excess food instead of throwing it away but they didn't. Which sucks because I just know that firemen or police or the hospital or the homeless shelter would have been so happy to get it. I think I'm doing better mentally after today because everyone who talked to me told me it was wrong to exclude me because of my wheelchair or oxygen. I did have my walker with me today but not my wheelchair or an oxygen tube. I had it in my car just in case I needed it and there were a couple of times I could have used it, but I was determined not to be in any picks with it out of pure spite.

I also wore the pretty dress I bought for the wedding and had many compliments. I'm still hurt and angry and miss having that closeness with their family, but I'm going to be okay. And that's a wrap. Next story, husband cheated with my cousin when I was postpartum. So I spent six years secretly planning my exit. made him pay for my education, house, car, and surgery before leaving him.

This has been my plan for six years. This is by far the craziest thing I've done and I can't believe I suffered all these years staying with this man just so I can survive financially. The start of our marriage was wonderful. We had two babies. After the second pregnancy he cheated on me with a very close family member. He gave me a lazy apology and on top of that he complained about my body. He also told me I was built like a refrigerator, mind you, I was four months postpartum at the time.

I secretly saw a family lawyer. To sum it up for you, I would be screwed leaving him. We only had $25,000 and that being split up is basically nothing for me. No martial properties. No car. I didn't have a job, literally nothing. I was a psalm. I applied for hundreds of jobs during the time and couldn't find employment anywhere so leaving was a decision for me financially speaking especially with two small babies. Also, alimony and child support wasn't going to be enough for me to live off of or survive with two babies with. So I let him believe that I forgave him and I continued being his wife. The very first time he cheated on me it was with my cousin. Then he cheated again, he had

a one-night stand with a random girl he met on a night out. I got so mad, I cheated back on him out of anger. OFC he never found out I cheated. At least I'm smart about it unlike him. During the time in our marriage, I worked on getting my independence back. My husband paid for my trade school. It was a very expensive program but he paid for everything. We moved and we bought a house with his income. He grew his money too during all this time.

So he made far more money now than he did when I originally wanted to leave him. I started working recently. I have a career now. I'm so happy about that. I haven't filed for divorce yet. He has no idea of my plans. I'm excited. I finally get to leave him after six almost seven years. Now I can walk away with at least $200,000 and we have martial assets now like the house and the car he also paid off for me. Now I have my education and my own career. I've been working on my weight loss. I lost 66 pounds he paid for for my tires epautee. I had a breast reduction and a breast lift. I look amazing, I don't doubt I'll probably get remarried eventually. Everything in my life is finally set and going the right way. Update, November 3rd, 2024. A lot of people here wanted an update the last time I posted. I wanted to update you guys and tell you that I did serve you know what's the funny part.

He was honestly shocked that this happened as if he didn't do anything wrong. He told his parents, on me because I'm really close with his parents and he thought they could persuade me to change my mind. His parents are sweet, however, they turned on me quickly and told me off for leaving their son. They let me know what he did was unacceptable, but what I'm doing is even worse by leaving him and a family behind. My husband cursed me off after the divorce news. He also called me a gold digger and went on a rant about how women only want money and blah, blah, blah. He also called me a because I went out with my girls and boys who are my close friends and we went to the bar and celebrated my divorce. Before I told my husband about this, anyways, we are in the middle of a

divorce now. It's a process. We both still live in the marital home until further noticed as noticed by the attorney. We will both have the 50 to 50 custody, most likely a rotating schedule. One of my kids is taking the divorce really hard even though he knows what happened and he's begging us to stay together and how he doesn't want us to get a divorce. Honestly, I did feel pretty bad after my son begged me not to divide up our family and to stay with their dad. But I know at the end of the day I need to be selfish and put my needs above everyone else's for once in my life. My son does hate me though, he won't talk to me and spends most of his time with daddy. My other child is younger and doesn't fully understand what's going

on and is just kind of brushing it off. My son just keeps saying he doesn't want divorced parents and he wants us to stay together and he doesn't want step-parents. My son is really taking it hard. He is also saying that he wants to spend most of his time with his father if I go through with the divorce and I just told him that's not how it's going to work and we will both spend time with him and he keeps saying it's not fair and he doesn't want to stay with me.