Reddit Stories - Did I make a mistake by ATTENDING the MARRIAGE CEREMONY of my former

Episode Date: February 17, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #weddingdrama #exrelationship #emotionalconflict #socialdilemma #personalboundariesSummary: The author reflects on attending their former partner's wedding ceremony, questioning whether it was a mistake. They navigate feelings of nostalgia, regret, and the impact of their decision on personal boundaries. The experience prompts deeper introspection about relationships and the complexities of moving on from past love.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, wedding, relationships, emotionalintelligence, personalgrowth, lifechoices, socialanxiety, heartbreak, movingon, exes, familydrama, selfreflection, decisionmaking, love, nostalgia, conflictresolutionBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

All episodes, completely add free with an Apple podcast subscription. Cancel any time. One-time offer, $2.00. Episode with two stories, first part. I hope you enjoy this story. Did I make a mistake by attending the marriage ceremony of my former daughter-in-law? I, a 56-year-old woman, have two offspring, Tom, 30 years old, and Lily, 27 years old. This concerns Tom. He previously was married to my daughter-in-law Ruth, 28F.

That is until five years ago, Ruth discovered that Bob was cheating on her while she was pregnant with my granddaughter. I was really disappointed in my son. I taught him to be better than this. I am a single mom. My husband died years ago and I have remarried only after my kids were in their late teens. I know for sure my late husband wouldn't approve of Bob's cheating. So, long story short, Bob, Ruth and I had a fight.

I told him I was very disappointed at him. How could he do this to his own wife? Bob yelled at me and said that I am his mother, not Ruth. So I should be taking his side. I said, no, I will not support his infidelity under any circumstances. My daughter also thinks that her brother is wrong, but she is neutral about it. Bob was mad and left the house. I only saw him at the divorce hearings.

I left him messages that if he wants to talk, I would be open to talk, but he didn't respond to my messages. Ruth was an orphan. She didn't have anyone else. So she saw me as her mother, even after the divorce, she would visit me and bring me some gifts, like flowers or cookies. I never stopped her. Ruth also never stopped calling me mom. Even after her divorce, I also loved spending time with her and my granddaughter about three years ago. I set up Ruth with my friend, Patty's son, John, Patty, and I have been close friends since childhood.

She knew Ruth really well and loved her too. It was Patty's idea to set her son up with my dill. Ruth and John totally hit it off. John was also a good father figure to her daughter. Recently John and Ruth got married. Ruth wanted me to be there to walk her down the aisle. She told me she walked down the aisle alone when she was married to my son, but now she wants me to walk her down.

I was happy for it. So I said, yes, the news reached to my son. He called me to again yell at me that what I am doing is wrong. I shouldn't be talking to Ruth because she and him are divorced. He forbade me to go. I told him he was being irrational. Even if he is divorced, that doesn't mean I have to cut off Ruth. I reminded him that it was his poor choice that led him to this.

I didn't listen to my son and went to the wedding. Anyways, my son got the news and was pissed. He kept cursing me that I am a deadbeat mom who left her own son for a W.H. Zero re. He called me a hypocrite that I didn't go to his wedding. He married his mistress, but was gallivanting at Ruth's wedding. My husband is with me, but he says my son has a point, but my daughter says otherwise. Was I wrong to go at her wedding? Edd at my son has emailed me to meet him.

I guess I will have to meet him now. Where did I go wrong? February 20th, 2023. I 56F have a son, Bob 30M along with him. I have a daughter 27F. My husband died when my daughter was only five years old. The death of their father came as a shock to Bob. I tried my best to comfort him.

I took him to therapist and trauma experts. They all said he is a good boy and very well behaved. The only father figure Bob had was his uncle, my brother. He was a nice man as well. A man with discipline. Ever since my kids were little, I tried my best to be a good parent. I stopped dating for a long time so that I can focus on my kids. I gave them important lessons in life.

I even told them about their dad. My late husband was a man of dignity and morals. He is the type of person who wouldn't sacrifice his morals to please people around him. I always tried to be both parents, but I guess I wasn't enough. My son started dating my Dill Ruth 28F when he was 20. They met at a restaurant where Ruth was a part-time worker. I liked Ruth. she was well-mannered and had a good heart. I told my son he picked the right woman for him.

Bob was head over heels for her. They got married two years after dating. Ruth finished her degree early and got a job as a teacher at the age of 22. I noticed that my son didn't like it. He would complain about Ruth sought hours, which I think was irrational because she was a kindergarten teacher. I explained this to my son that Ruth has her own life, a life outside his own. I told him if he had concerns about her time, he should take it up to her. He said he understood things were really calm for a year. A year later, they started having another fight. Ruth said that she wanted to pursue her masters. She is still young and wanted to do something meaningful with her degree. Honestly, I was in support. Ruth was a prodigy,

but my son objected. He thought that it was a bad idea and that it would cause trouble. Now I don't like to mix in their lives. I tried to stay away from their conflict. That is until one day Ruth came to me and said, Bob threatened to leave her. If she ever tried to pursue a master's degree, I did give my son an earful. And honestly, I took it as an offense

because I worked jobs to support my family. I worked hard and now I have my own business. It is just so disappointing to me that my son had such backward thinking. Few weeks later, Ruth came to me and said she was pregnant. She forgot all about her masters. I tried to be there for her as much as possible. Later, Ruth discovered my son was cheating on her with a mutual friend of theirs. Ruth was devastated. I called a family meeting there. Ruth was crying and told Bob, how could he do this to her? Bob said things like Ruth doesn't love him. She doesn't make him feel special.

Her friend always fulfills his needs and understands him better. He realized he was wasting his 20s by playing family with a woman who always fights him. I asked what were the fights. And what did Ruth do to make him so angry? He said her whole existence just bothers me. She cares more about her higher education than me. If she was a good wife, she would be a housewife rather than going out. I reminded him that I also had higher educations.

He said that's different. They argued a lot. My son just called her a W.H. Zero Re and A.B. H. T.C.H.H. the whole time. Moreover, he is an absent father to his own daughter. He pays child support, but barely makes time for his daughter. He went low contact when I stood my ground and told him I will not support his infidelity at any cost. I met his mistress because he insisted I gave her a chance and told me that after meeting her, I would change my mind about Ruth, but he was wrong.

His mistress was not a nice person. My gut was telling me she was not a good-hearted either. She made an odd comment that she was saving my son from a potential bad marriage and I should be happy for him. I told him I will not be at his wedding. If me marries the woman who wrecked his home, I know my son is more to blame, but she knew Ruth and Bob. She knew they were married.

Recently, Ruth got married to John, my friend. friend's son. Ruth asked me to walk her down the aisle. It reached my son's ears and he called me all sorts of vile names. He forbade me to go to her wedding and called me a hypocrite because I didn't come to his wedding, but I was going to Ruth's. I just told him to calm down and talk to me when he is not acting like a baby. I just feel like a failure. Like I failed my late husband too. My late husband would be disappointed in my son as well. I don't know where I went wrong. I tried my best to provide. Maybe not having a father made him like this.

I sometimes now regret having him as my son, but I still love him, but I don't love the man he turned out to be. I guess being a single mom was a curse after all update Ida for going to my ex-Dill's wedding February 24, 2023. First of all, thank you for your comments. Although I got some hate comments calling me a bad mom and a failure. It was nice to see people supported me. It gave strength to know I am was not making a bad decision.

So now on to the update. My son emailed me and said he wants to talk to me. I thought I should have a long conversation with him, but I made some ground rules. He is not allowed to criticize or call anyone any names like the last time and will be civil when I am talking. He agreed. He came to my house yesterday during noon. My husband was off to work and my daughter was in her room.

He sat down and there were moments of awkward silence. He asked me how I was. And we had small talk. I asked him about his wife and that's when he started to cry, not ugly crying, just few tears. I can tell he is not doing well. I sat beside him and told him he can tell me he tells me everything. He tells me that he is sorry for how he reacted. He understands why I might be ashamed of him.

He later tells me his marriage is not going well, that his wife is no way near as good as Ruth was. Ruth took care all of his needs and loved him. Yet he treated Ruth like trash. He is constantly fighting with his new wife. He knew he fucked up a lot. He learned that the last time he visited his daughter and she kept referring John as her dad. Bob tried to make her say the word dad. And she screamed at him by saying, You are not my dad.

He saw how much happy Ruth was with another man. And he realized what he has lost. I asked him, would you have missed Ruth? If your wife did those same things for you, like Ruth did. He was silent. I further told him, it seems to me that he only kept Ruth in his life because he used her to fulfill his needs. I explained to him about my relationship with his father.

We were with each other, not because I fulfilled his needs. We were with each other because we loved each other. And that love didn't stop when one person was at the most vulnerable and weak, but he, my son, left Ruth when she was vulnerable and needed him the most. His needs were fulfilled when Ruth was just a housewife working a small job. But as soon as she has no need, he discarded her. It really hit him hard as he was sobbing. He said that he knows he was a S-H-T-Y person, but he was manipulated by that B, T-C-H.

He said that about his wife. To be honest, I lost my cool and yelled, he should stop blaming other people for his mistake. It was his decision to cheat. It was his decision to leave Ruth. It was his decision to abandon his daughter. He cannot run away from his responsibilities and wonder why nobody is taking his side. Moreover, he hasn't learned anything from his mistakes because he is still calling his wife file names. This is the same girl she claimed is better than Ruth.

He had a choice not to cheat. He could have pushed her away when she tried to seduce him, but he didn't because in his mind, he made this fantasy that Ruth doesn't care about him because all she ever wanted was to complete her education. I raised him better than this. He is not just insulting my upbringing. He is also insulting his own father. and he will only cease suffering in his life unless he takes full accountability of his actions. He told me he knows I was disappointed at him and he wants to make things right.

He is trapped in a bad marriage because God is punishing him for how he treated his daughter and ex-wife. I told him if he wants to be a good man, he should start by apologizing to Ruth and become cordial with his daughter. I also gave him a reality check that his daughter already sees John as her dad. so I have doubts she would start calling him dad anytime soon, but he should at least try. I told him to apologize to his sister as well. If he is really miserable in his marriage, he should get a divorce or try counseling. Whatever decision he makes, I will support him, but that does not mean I will forgive his wife because she has also did Ruth wrong, unless she makes an apology to Ruth.

I don't think I can see her as a decent person. Lastly, I told him that even though I am very much disappointed in him, I still love him. I will always guide him to what is right. He will always be my son, but this is his chance to be a better man. I believe in second chances this time. I hope he cleans up his act. I am proud of him that he acknowledges his wrongdoings. Comments

Op Do your son a favor, get some therapy recommendations for him and hand him the list on things like this. One doesn't just clean up his act that is vague and doesn't tell him how to do it. We need to do what the pull yourself up by the bootstraps mentality when it comes to stuff like this. If he wants to do the work to improve his relationship with his daughter, she can have two dads, frankly speaking, he has to work on himself. Op replies, I told him he should get therapy if he needs money for that. I will give it to him, but he does need therapy, but about his daughter, have hope. Bob said he has tried to be there for his daughter, but his daughter still wants

John as her dad. He has to start with baby steps. He can arrange the custody with Ruth or simply make full use of his visitations. I feel like I am cheating on my now husband with my dead husband, February 27, 23. This is my throwaway. I will delete it soon. It's been 22 years since my husband died in an accident. I remember in his last moments, he was doing fine. He was too weak to speak, but still managed to say that he loves me and he loves his kids. Me and my late husband have this thing where we would write a letter to each other once a year and it has to be handwritten. In his last letter, he mentioned death. He said if death comes, then I should remember that he loves me with all his heart and he doesn't have any regrets.

I guess he somehow knew this would be his last letter. I still have that letter. I still have a place for him in my heart. He was not just my husband. He is also the father of my kids. How can I forget him? Just like that. I didn't date for a long time, mainly because I focused on raising my two kids.

But also because I couldn't find anyone even comparable to my husband. I met my now husband when my daughter was 15. My son was also 18 and in college. He is sweet, kind, gentle and funny. He always has this positive outlook on life. After a long time, I had this butterfly in my stomach kind of feeling. I fell in love with him. We got married after dating for four years.

My husband is also a widower. He also has kids who are a little older than my kids and left the nest early. I have built a second home with my husband. I am happy. I love this man and I want nothing more than to enjoy his company as much as I can. But lately I've been going through some personal stuff with my son. It made me miss my late husband even more. His stuff is still in my basement. I couldn't have the heart to throw it all out. I still have his camera, his pocket watch, the Rubik's cube he liked to solve, his books, and most importantly, his letters. I miss him so much.

but sometimes I feel like I am doing unfair to my husband. He is such a good man. I feel like I am cheating on him. I know it is not possible, but still. I try my best to not think about him, but I do. It's hard not to. Am I cheating? Is this normal?

I don't want to keep my husband in dark. I care about him. I respect him. He doesn't deserve a wife who cheats. Final update, Ada for going to my ex-Dill's wedding, March 28, 2023. Hello folks. Thanks for showing me a lot of love and support. I am really overwhelmed with it. It has been a month since my last post. Things are fine now. I will be giving updates from our slash marriage post too. Well, first of all, my daughter moved out from my house. She was living

with us along with her fiancé to save money to buy their own place. I am happy for her. The house just feels empty without her, but I will get over it, about my post on marriage subreddit. I talked to my husband about my feelings towards my late husband. He was surprisingly fine. He told me he understands that I miss him. Sometimes he misses his dead wife too. He still keeps a picture of her with him. I don't mind it. He first My mother told me that the pain we both went through is something no one would understand and he doesn't feel like I am betraying him by missing my dead husband. He was my family and it is normal to miss family.

I'm glad I had this talk with him. I fell in love with him even more. Ruth and John are doing fine. She announced that they are expecting a child together and Ruth asked me to be the godmother. I am really overwhelmed and happy for them, though I still don't know whether I should be her kid's godmother or not. Now on to my son. He has decided to separate from his wife.

I guess his marriage has problems and he is trying to sort it out on his own. He is in therapy. I support him in his journey. Things between my granddaughter and him are still a bit sour, but I'm helping as a middleman. He talked to Ruth about change in custody, but she said no, because given how he has treated her in past couple of years, she doesn't trust him. I know Bob is sad, but I assured him he shouldn't give up now. He should still fulfill his duty as a dad.

He meets my granddaughter at my house. Right now they are playing snakes and ladders in my living room. My son has been really trying to be a better version of himself and I support that. I hope in future things will improve for him. Thank you so much for helping a mother out here. I know if I ever have any issues I cannot solve, I can always count on the kind people of Reddit. That's the end of the first story.

Let's begin the second one. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse mentioned he preferred to rest with my closest companion rather than me, so I fibbed that she reciprocated his feelings, arranged a group outing, and observed her spouse shatter his heart. Knows when he tried to hit on her. So a little context before I get into what happened. The three of us went to high school together,

but my best friend's husband met her at work. My husband Jacob, 28M, and I, 28F, got married three years ago after two years of being together. My best friend Nicole, 28F, and I have been friends ever since we were in kindergarten. We've been friends for a really long time and are still going strong. She married Travis a year ago, 30M, after being in a relationship for about three years. Jacob wasn't friends with me and Nicole back in high school, but we were acquaintances. Jacob and I only met at the high school reunion we had a couple of years after graduation and we became friends there.

Nicole had to skip that one because she was sick. He asked me out on a couple of dates and we realized we had a lot more in common than we thought. That's how we got into a relationship and we were relatively happy. Our married life was great, too, and we'd even gone out on several double dates with Nicole and Travis. Things were going so well until about a week ago, when my husband and I were having a night in and we'd polished off an entire bottle of wine because we'd had a really busy week and wanted to celebrate. Just for fun, we decided to play that game where we named five celebrities who we could hook up with without our partner getting mad at us and I named five

but he was able to name only four. I was teasing him about it and told him that he needed to name five or else I'd win this one. Of course, there was no winning or losing in this game. I was just messing with him, but he thought about it for a while and then blurted out that he'd definitely love to get with Nicole sometime or the other if he knew that I wouldn't get mad. I was shocked and didn't know what to say at the time and tried to laugh it off since he was chuckling as well. But in spite of being drunk as hell, I couldn't find the humor in what he'd said and couldn't just laugh it off. So I asked him if he was being serious and informed him that he could only name celebrities because it's unlikely that we'll ever even get to meet them and if he names real people, that just makes it weird. He told me that he was serious and even confessed that he'd had a crush on Nicole even when we were in high school. He didn't even think that he should have stopped there and went on to say that he used to think of me as her less attractive sidekick back then.

I could just stare at him open mouth because whatever he was telling me was just so disrespectful and mean. I guess he'd just forgotten that I was his wife now and continued to talk about how he'd love to have a day out with a woman like Nicole and just how lucky Travis is. I'd had enough that night so I just left the room without a word and went to the bedroom and went to sleep. I was really upset, but I was also very drunk so I fell asleep quickly, hoping that I'd forget all of this in the morning. But I didn't forget in the next morning, I decided to confront Jacob about what he'd said the previous night at breakfast. He seemed pretty unaffected by last night even though I was nursing a terrible hangover. When I asked him if he'd actually meant what he'd said about Nicole last night,

he told me that it was all true and didn't even seem sorry about it. He wasn't even embarrassed to admit it and just continued to have his cereal and I was getting pissed off because this guy was supposed to be my husband yet he had no shame in admitting that he'd always been more attracted to my best friend. I decided to ask him if he still found Nicole attractive and without missing a beat, he told me that he did. That was the last straw for me and I lashed out at him over. it, but instead of apologizing, he doubled down on what he was saying and told me that I needed

to just accept it and move on. He did love me more than her and believe that I was his soulmate, but he still did think that Nicole was objectively more attractive than me and if it came down to physical attraction then he'd pick her over me any day. And he expected me not to be offended at that because what's more normal than your husband telling you that if it came down to it, he'd rather sleep with your best friend than you? We got into a really ugly fight and he left for work after telling me that I was being petty and childish. He said that he wasn't going to sugarcoat the truth for me and if he didn't find me as attractive as Nicole, then he wasn't going to say it just to boost my ego and make me feel better about myself. He even tried to gaslight me by

saying that if I hadn't wanted an honest answer the other night, then I shouldn't have brought up that stupid game at all and I should have just let it be when he wasn't able to name five people instead of teasing him about it. As if I was the problem here. I didn't go to work that day and just kept breaking into tears throughout the day. I wanted to talk to someone about this, but ironically, I couldn't talk to the only two people I usually share everything with, my husband and my best friend. So I chose not to say anything and tried to pretend that I was fine when Jacob came back home. We didn't speak after the fight and then for the next two days because he was convinced that he hadn't done anything wrong and was just being honest here. On the third day, I finally broke down

and ended up telling Nicole everything. She'd noticed that my behavior was all off and I sounded perturbed so for two days. She kept asking me if I was all right and was very concerned about me in general. I just couldn't hold it together anymore and told her the truth. She was furious on my behalf

and was about to call Jacob up and give him a piece of her mind, but I stopped her. I just didn't know what to do at all and I definitely didn't want her to confront him just yet because I wasn't ready. But Nicole pushed me to realize that what Jacob had said to me

was really messed up and that I needed to teach him a lesson and then leave this marriage because it was very clear that he didn't respect me at all. She was right, of course, but I didn't know what to do to teach him a lesson. It was only when Nicole mentioned how she wished Jacob would have said something like this while Travis was around and that would have been a sight to see because he'd beat up a guy before who tried to cat-call Nicole that I realized I could just do exactly that. I asked her if she'd be okay with me arranging a double date with them in the next couple of days and having Jacob bring this up in front of Travis. She agreed readily and we had a good laugh thinking about what had happened to Jacob if he said crap like this on the date.

By then, the hurt had dissipated and had been replaced by anger so I decided to go ahead with this plan of mine and even apologize to Jacob for overreacting, even though I didn't mean a word for it. I just wanted him to say yes to the double date. I made it up to him with his favorite dinner and he actually had the audacity to tell me that he was glad I'd finally come to my senses, and he agreed to the date. The plan that Nicole and I had come up with was reckless enough, and I also added fuel to the fire by lying to my husband a day before the date by telling him that I'd learned from Nicole that even she'd had a crush on him for the longest time

and would love to go out with him someday, so he should probably bring that up on the date. He seemed taken aback and asked if Travis was okay with it, and I lied and said that he didn't care because it was just a date and he didn't mind. he seemed very pleased with that and was smiling from ear to ear when I told him that, which lessened my guilt by a lot, to be honest. Yesterday, we finally left for the date in the evening and Nicole and I had picked one of the finest restaurants in the city. We were all dressed up and it was supposed to be a great day for all of us. Nicole and I were excited because finally, Jacob was going to get whacked

and we believed that he desperately needed that. So after some small talk and a couple of glasses of wine, I finally brought up the game that we'd been playing the other day as a way to steer the conversation where we wanted it to go. Once again, I named five celebrities and asked Jacob to go next. He was confident enough to name Nicole this time without any prompting because of what had led him to believe the day before about Nicole feeling the same way about him and Travis not giving a damn. Unfortunately, neither of those things were true and as soon as he named Nicole, she pretended to be shocked and so did I. We threw him under the bus there, and when I took a look at Travis, he was already fuming. He's a pretty buff guy,

so it was definitely intimidating, but Jacob was unfazed and continued to smile at Nicole. Travis addressed it first and told him that he needed to apologize to everyone at the table and then we would end this double date. So Jacob had a chance to read the room and do the right thing, but as usual, he did the exact opposite of it and still chose to believe my lies despite the proof of it being untrue being right in front of his face in the form of an angry Travis and a shocked Nicole. Yet he chose to answer back saying that he wasn't going to apologize because he knew that the feelings were mutual. He even decided to take it a notch higher and said that now that everything was out in the open, he and Nicole didn't need to push down

their feelings for each other anymore and pretend like there was no tension there because now, Travis and I couldn't do anything. Unfortunately, Travis most definitely could do a lot of things and out of anger. He immediately grabbed Jacob by the collar from across the table and pulled him up to a standing position. And before we even had time to react, there was a loud thump after which I only remember Jacob being knocked down and the restaurant authorities escorting all of us out. Nobody called the cops because the restaurant didn't want any bad press, which was lucky for us. There was a lot of blood afterwards and from what I know, Jacob had a broken nose, but he still had the audacity to continue the brawl outside the restaurant. He tried to taunt

Nicole and me by calling us cowards because by then, he'd put two and two to get two to get a little to and realized that we'd come up with this plan only to humiliate him and only left when Travis warned him that one more word from him would land him in the hospital for a good few days. After that, I didn't go home and instead went to a hotel nearby. They dropped me off and while in the car, we explained everything to Travis. We thought he'd be a little myth that we hadn't involved him in this plan of ours, but he told us that he was glad we hadn't informed him beforehand or else he might not have punched Jacob since he doesn't like getting into fights unless it's something serious.

But he told us that Jacob deserved this and he wasn't sorry about it at all. He dropped me off and they went home after dinner since we hadn't been able to eat at the restaurant. After about two hours, just before I was about to crash, I received a text from Jacob saying that I was an awful person for doing what I did. He complained that he had to go to the ER all on his own since his nose was broken and he'd had to get it plastered. He said that my decision to screw with him just to get back at him for merely saying that he found Nicole attractive was disgusting and that he wanted a divorce as soon as possible.

According to him, what I did was unacceptable and he thought that it was psychotic and juvenile of me to concoct a plan to get him beaten up by a guy twice as big as him. I felt a little bad that he had to deal with the ER on his own because I know blood and hospitals freak him out. I didn't respond to his text last night because I was too tired to even think about anything else so I just went to sleep without much delay. I was still riding the high of watching Jacob get punched and didn't think that I'd done anything wrong. But now that I've woken up and I've also sobered up, I realized that what I did was definitely

kind of messed up. He was right, it was juvenile of me and Nicole to sit and plot against him just to watch him make a total fool out of himself and then get punched right in the face. I think we went a little overboard and did something very high schoolish. I'm not happy about it anymore, but I'm also not sure if he was in the right here either. I mean, he did say a lot of things that were just not cool. Not only did he admit that he finds Nicole hot right in front of her husband and his own wife, but he actively tried to get with her while we were around. I know he only said those things because I'd let him believe that Nicole liked him back,

but even then, it was crazy because that meant that these had been his true feelings toward her all along. And I still can't forget the fact that he called me her less attractive sidekick. That's obviously got to sting coming from your own husband. I know the marriage is over, but I don't know if I owe him an apology for doing what I did. I do think what I did was petty and kind of overkill, but the things he said last evening kind of made it seem like he deserved it. So I'd offer lying to my husband and letting him hit on my best friend just to get him beaten up by her husband?

Update 1, okay, I went through the comments on my original post and I'll admit it. I messed up big time. Most of you guys said that ESH and I know it's true. What my husband said was disgusting, but what Nicole and I did was super juvenile as well. We didn't even take Travis' feelings into consideration and kind of used him and his anger just to humiliate and hurt Jacob. We were actually counting on him losing his temper even though we knew that he had to work hard to bring it under control and made a total mockery out of it which was very, very insensitive

of us. I guess I was just acting out of spite and didn't give anything much thought and neither did Nicole. I'm embarrassed now that I'm thinking about what we did with a clear mind and so is Nicole. So we really do think that we owe Jacob an apology because he did get physically hurt and like many of you said, there might be a chance that he might press charges or something. It's been three days and it hasn't happened yet, but that doesn't mean it won't. So just to be on the safe side, Nicole and I are going to apologize to him but I'm still leaving him. It's going to be hard but I know I have to do this.

It's the right thing to do. We're also going to apologize to Travis, obviously. Because we know that we took undue advantage of his weakness and I think I painted a really bad image of him here, too. He's not a bad guy, honestly. He's just had a rough time with his anger, but he's still going to therapy to deal with it and it's improved a lot since when he was a teen delinquent.

He'd never heard a fly unless it posed a threat to him and tries to avoid getting violent as much as he can. He even gave Jacob a chance to apologize and only got mad when he didn't and continue to creep his wife out and to be fair. I think that anyone would have lost it by then. Also, the incident that Nicole was telling me about where he'd beaten up a guy for cat-calling her was from several years ago, when they just started dating and he'd just given him a black eye. Like I said, he wouldn't hurt anyone who doesn't totally deserve it. I'm not trying to defend violence in general, but sometimes you have to do something about certain situations where words just don't seem to cut it.

Update 2. Hi, everyone. So Nicole and I tried to apologize to Jacob today, but it was not well received. I went back home with her to collect my things and bring some fresh clothes with me to the hotel. He let me in, but he looked really unhappy about it and didn't say a word to either of us the entire time that we were there. His nose was still in bandages and I did feel guilty about it because he was visibly in a lot of pain. We packed in silence and I decided to apologize right before we were about to leave. I told him that I wanted to apologize for being so harsh and tricking him and I thought he'd apologize to me and Nicole as well for saying all that crap that he did. But instead of that, he told me to leave and that he wasn't interested

in our apologies now that the damage was already done. He told us to be grateful that he hadn't pressed charges against Travis and said that both of us should count ourselves lucky that he'd even expressed any interest in either of us at all because both of us were nothing compared to the women he'd been with before us. So that was a little weird, but we were too shocked to say anything, and he continued to rant about how he'd given us both a chance, but we'd both blown it so now, our apologies meant nothing to him because no matter what we said, he wasn't going to take me back, and he definitely wasn't going out with Nicole anymore. I tried to tell him that we weren't here to ask for a second shot to be with him, and he was delusional for even thinking that that's what the

apology was for, but he slammed the door shut right in our faces. I guess it was our fault for believing that he'd have turned into a decent human being all of a sudden. That clearly didn't happen and I'm not surprised either. Even when we were in a relationship and throughout our marriage, he'd talk freely about his hot co-workers or cute women he'd meet, but I never thought much of it since it wasn't like he was acting on it. So no harm, no foul. I had the misconception that he told me all about his interactions with other women because that's how secure I was but turns out, it had nothing to do with me and everything to do with his own ego and the fact that he thought he was God's gift to earth and wanted me to be grateful that he was married to me.

In spite of the million other choices that he apparently thinks he has. But at least Nicole and I did our part and apologized for screwing up, but he's in over his head so his rejecting our apology is not something we can help. Our conversation with Travis went a lot better and in fact, he insisted that we didn't need to apologize at all because he would gladly whack any other disrespectful guy the same way because that's the only way they learn. He even said that if his parents couldn't teach him to respect his wife and other women, then he'd be more than happy to take that job up and teach him in his own way,

which I thought was kind of cool of him. Nevertheless, we did apologize to him for taking advantage of him and inadvertently trying to rile him up just for our entertainment and he accepted it. That was it, no further drama. So that was all in now, I'm just looking for a lawyer to deal with the impending divorce. I don't know how I'm feeling about any of this, but I know I'll get through it as long as I have my friends and family with me. It's just going to be a pain to meet him during the divorce proceedings, but I'll be fine, I guess.

Update 3, hi, so I filed for divorce a couple of days ago and Jacob was served yesterday. This morning, I received a text from him telling me that I was going to regret this, but since I'd already filed for divorce, he wasn't going to stop me. He told me to come back and collect everything else that belonged to me, like all the knickknacks, photo albums, and other miscellaneous things that I owned but didn't bring with me because I hadn't found an apartment yet and I was still living in the hotel. He told me to get it done by the end of this week or he'd either give it away to charity or just dump it in the trash so I've had a word with Nicole and will be moving in with her temporarily and she's been kind enough to let me keep all my

belongings in her storeroom until I'm able to find accommodation for myself. I'm so grateful for her. I swear. I know Jacob has been talking crap about me to all our common friends, but he doesn't realize that he's the one who comes off as a total clown who hit on his wife's best friend and then got beaten up by her husband. Most people have reached out to me to tell me I'm doing the right thing and wished me luck because of his story. So he's doing me a favor without even knowing it. And his disrespect and pettiness don't even bother me anymore because I know he's just a total loser and I'm inherently better than him.