Reddit Stories - Episode #15 - When Family Turns Toxic Reddit Confessions ( Over 9 Hour Compilation )

Episode Date: October 28, 2025

#redditstories #sleep #sleepstories #bedtimestories #fallasleep #toxicfamily #aita #relaxingstories #sleepcompilation Experience Episode 15 – When Family Turns Toxic, a 9-hour Reddit confessions journey through betrayal, heartbreak, and forgiveness. These raw, emotional stories of toxic family dynamics are told in a soothing tone to help you reflect, release tension, and gently drift into deep, healing sleep. Tags: redditstories, sleepstories, fallasleep, bedtimestories, relaxingconfessions, toxicfamily, aitastories, familybetrayal, emotionalhealing, longcompilation, soothingvoice, relaxingpodcast, bedtimeaudio, peacefulstories, sleeptime, unwindstories, calmingnarration, sleepbetter, nightrelaxation, sleepaidBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Partner assured my father he would propose before the month concluded, but when our anniversary arrived, he mentioned the possibility of waiting another two to three weeks. As a result, I decided to end the relationship, and now he has left. Silent which proves he never actually wanted to marry me. Hi everyone. I'm just looking for honest advice, especially from women who've been in long-term relationships and reached this point of what now?

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost six years, our anniversary is tomorrow, and I'm starting to feel incredibly anxious. I'm 31, turning 32 this year, and he's about to turn 29. We've had some big life shifts over the years, not necessarily ups and downs, but changes that have impacted where we are now. Last year on our five-year anniversary, he did acknowledge the day, he brought home some flowers and a card, but it was toward the evening. It didn't feel personal or intentional. When I asked him why he didn't really plan anything, he said that he felt it would be embarrassing to celebrate being a five-year girlfriend. His words, not mine.

He said he only wanted to celebrate with a proposal, that he didn't want to go all out for an anniversary if it wasn't going to include that. But shortly after, I found out he had just been laid off from his job around that same time. A few weeks later, we moved out of the apartment we've been living in together for three years and moved back in with our parents, separately, with a plan to save money and move our life forward. That was a year ago. We've now both been at home for a year, and we've talked a lot about our future, marriage, kids, home ownership.

All of it. And here's the part that's bothering me now. A few months ago in July, my dad happened to see him as he was arriving at my house. They spoke briefly, and my dad asked him, in a respectful, non-pressuring way, you can be been around a long time, when are you planning to propose to my daughter? My boyfriend told him confidently, before the end of next month. Meaning before the end of August. My dad is usually chill and doesn't get into stuff like this, but he just decided to ask him. We're now at the end of August. Our anniversary is tomorrow, Friday. And August ends this Sunday. And I haven't seen or heard

anything that suggests he's actually planning to follow through. He hasn't mentioned a dinner reservation. No hints, no dress nice, no don't make plans. Just regular daily interaction. And I've been intentionally avoiding dropping hints because I want the proposal to feel real and special, not like something I poked or pressured him into. This morning, I tested the waters and sent him a link to an art walk event happening this weekend in Destin, about two hours away from us. I framed it as something I was interested in doing, didn't mention proposals or anything like that. He replied enthusiastically and even said he could get us an Airbnb from Saturday through Monday so we can make a weekend of it. And while that might sound like initiative, it's making me feel

uneasy. Because to me, that confirms he didn't have any actual plans already in place. If he did, he would have had to decline or rework the weekend, not just say yeah, let's go. and suggest a spontaneous trip. This has happened before. On Valentine's Day earlier this year, he said he had something special planned, and when I found out what it was, it was tickets to Universal Studios and Disney World.

A big gesture, sure. But what I really wanted was progress. The proposal. Not just another trip or experience to distract from what really matters to me. To be clear, he's told me recently that his savings are looking really good. That's stuck with me. If finances are in order, and the relationship is steady, what's the hold-up? I've already made up my mind that I won't accept a proposal that comes after September 1st, not because I'm trying to give an ultimatum, but because it simply

won't feel special anymore. It would feel late. Like I had to wait him into it, and I can't accept that. I'm at a point in life where I want to build something, a home, a family, a future. and I can't keep dragging my heart through these kinds of almost moments just to keep the peace. So I'm asking, am I being unreasonable? Would you wait past the deadline he set for himself? Or would you take his inaction as the answer? Update 1, hey, I know some of y'all were asking for an update for my previous post, but it was locked by the mods. I'm getting ready for dinner as I type this, but honestly,

a part of me feels like I'm not going to be proposed to tonight. And that's a hard pill to swallow. In the last post, I mentioned that he told me, verbatim, that I would not be his girlfriend by our next anniversary. He said he would a thousand percent be proposing by then. And he told my dad the same thing. So this wasn't something I imagined or hinted about. It came directly from him.

Now fast forward to today, he sent me a sweet good morning text, booked me a massage for 5 p.m., and made dinner reservations at one of our favorite restaurant. for 8.30 p.m. But the restaurant closes at 9 p.m. That already raised an eyebrow for me. I asked him if he meant 7.30 instead, and he just said, nah, but I can move it up earlier if you want. That response, and the fact that he only called the restaurant earlier today, made things feel more casual than I expected. I guess I'm just sitting here asking myself, would it be unreasonable for me to leave him if he doesn't propose tonight?

Yes, there are a few days left in August. But if you tell someone you're going to do something by a certain date, and they plan their heart around that timeline, are they wrong for walking away when it doesn't happen? I'm trying not to spiral. I know there's still a dinner to go to. But deep down, I'm preparing myself to be let down, and trying to figure out what comes next if I am. Update 2, a few of you asked for an update, so here it is. Our anniversary was yesterday. He planned a dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, and earlier in the day, he told me he had booked a massage for me and that we had 8.30 reservations.

When he got to my house, he had a big bouquet of flowers and the David Yermen bracelet I'd been wanting. But the way he gave it to me felt strange. It was off. He didn't look me in the eye, he just passed the bag to me quickly before heading to the bathroom to change. I said, thank you, but a part of me knew in that moment, when he gave me me me me. me that expensive bracelet like that, that I wouldn't be getting a proposal that night. He kept telling me I looked beautiful and amazing, and that he liked the color I was wearing. I'd put effort into looking good for our anniversary, and I know I looked good. But when I looked at him, there was a sadness or disappointment in his eyes. Something felt off. I think he was picking up on how quiet I had gotten after he gave me

the bracelet. When we got to the restaurant, he tried making small talk, but I wasn't. I really going. I was just mirroring his energy because something in me could tell he wasn't fully present. Eventually, I asked him why he was so quiet, and I brought up the bracelet. He immediately defended himself, saying he was just on his way to change clothes and didn't mean anything by how he gave it to me. I told him it just didn't feel special. Then I asked him directly, are you proposing tonight? He looked disappointed and said, no. That's when I told him to cancel the food order because I was ready to leave, and I got up and walked out. When we got in the car, I told him I felt like this was over. I said if I stayed, I'd just be wasting more time. I asked

when he planned to propose, and he started fumbling over his words and said something like maybe in the next two to three weeks. I told him he had until today, and that was it for me. The car ride home was quiet. When we got close to the house, I didn't say much. I got out. I got out. I got out, and went inside. A few minutes later, I noticed he had turned his location off. I texted him shortly after and told him to come get the dog in his things. He came back, picked everything up, and we ended up having one final conversation before he left. I told him flat out I'm getting older, I'm in my early 30s, and I've been clear that I'm ready to move forward with my life. He gave me his word, and he even gave my father his word that he would propose by the end of this month. Now all

All of a sudden, when I asked directly, he tells me probably in the next two to three weeks. I asked him what difference a few weeks would even make. He said I was wrong to assume he doesn't want to marry me or that he doesn't love me. He said that he loves me more than he loves himself. He said he hates that it looks like he doesn't want to marry me because that's not the case. And then he brought up something that caught me off guard. He said years ago, I mentioned that one of my cousins got proposed to with a $10,000. ring, and ever since then, he thought that was what I expected and felt like that's honestly

what I deserve after waiting so long. I had only mentioned the price of the ring to say how over the top it was, not to encourage him. I've always told him I don't need a ring that expensive, and he knows that. I'm not materialistic like that. I told him I'm not falling for that excuse. I never asked for a $10,000 ring, and he knows that. What I was really thinking is, yes, we hit some financial struggles last year. He lost his job for a month, we moved back in with our parents, and we've been living there ever since. Our plan was to move out this year. I've been patient, but none of that changes the fact that he's had time to plan, time to save since we live at home with our parents and he hasn't. Before he left, I'll admit I was really upset. I called him a liar.

And when I did, he said something like, if that's what you think of me, then let's just both be done because there's nothing I can say at this point. And then I told him to leave. Since then, he hasn't reached out. It's been 12 hours and I haven't heard a word from him. I'm pretty sure he's already deleted all of my pictures. I turned my location off too. So now I'm just here, sitting with it. I lost my mom to cancer last year. My dad is getting older. And no, I'm not trying to live for my parents. But it hurts deeply knowing my mom will never get to see me get married or have kids. I spent six years with this man.

Six years of my life. And now it's just done. I booked an appointment with my old therapist. I haven't seen her in almost a year, but I need help working through this. Right now, I just feel numb. Please be nice to me because I am shattered. Comment where OP has replied, comment if nothing, nothing else was an indicator. The fact that he gave up and walked away so easily tells you that he definitely didn't want to get married and he probably planned it this way.

So you'd end it liar and a coward. And you are well shot of him. Boop. I feel this way too. It's been two days and I haven't talked to him. I did tell him I was done after he told me maybe two to three weeks, but the fact that he hasn't reached out since that night shows me that he never planned to propose two to three weeks later either. Next story. Baby Daddy's new wife, who used to be my best friend demanded I get rid of my daughter's cats because of her allergies, then tried to get a restraining order against me and take my daughter away when I refused. I, 24F, have recently got new cats. My daughter, 6, has always wanted cats and she has an obsession with them and frequently says all I want in this world are cats. However, Baby Daddy's 25 new wife, 25, is deathly allergic to cats and she has an obsession with them and frequently says all I want in this world are cats. However, baby daddy's 25 new wife, 25, is deathly allergic to cats and, and she has a and has been to the hospital once for it.

I have multiple friends with cats and my daughter is frequently around them and plays with them, then goes over to baby daddy and wife's house and there has never been a complaint of allergies. I was told by wife that she would start taking allergy shots and would be good to go in around a month's time. I found the perfect cat's sibling pair from an adoption agency in my area. Adopt don't shop less than three. And with the info on it being about a month,

I had a friend agreed to watch them in the transition period and would take caution in giving baths, changing clothes, etc., if my daughter did see the cats. Well, yesterday I let them know that she had come in contact with the cats briefly, but she was bathed and put in freshly washed clothes that had not been in the same house as them. I was told to still take her over to her grandparents' house for another rinse-off and change of clothes just in case. After dropping her off, I received a call from baby daddy where he told me his wife could no longer get the shots since they just found out she's pregnant so he would like the cats

re-homed or returned to the adoption agency. My biggest concern is for my daughter and I genuinely believe if the cats were taken from her permanently it would be traumatic for how long and how badly she's wanted them. Not to mention the resent in her it would cause towards the wife and new baby and that's just a horrible thing to do after giving a pet a new home after being rescues. Also I would be effectively blacklisted from all rescues and agencies if I were to do that and rightly so. I ended up getting another call the day after saying they were in the ER for hours.

and spend a bunch of money for the visit and the cats need to be rehomed. But like I said before, my daughter has been around cats many times and gone over there and there's never been an issue and I find it hard to believe after two baths and close changes that it truly caused such a bad reaction that the hospital is necessary. It's also important to note that the three of us have not always gotten along especially since the wife was my best friend for a while before I found out she got with him so we were on very bad terms for a very long time so I find it hard to give up something me and my daughter have been so excited and I've worked so hard to get to a place where we can get them only to be

told we can't because of their decision to have a new baby. So they're still asking the cats be given back or rehomed and making me feel like I'm the bad guy. Am I the asshole? Comments where Op has replied. Comment one. My first thought was either both or new wife are trying to push this kid out now that new baby is in the way. Boop. So it's actually the opposite. He's now trying to get me to give up my time with her until they figure out what to do so they don't want her to come over here at all until then so that she isn't re-exposed and sent back to the hospital after another switch-off week. I told them this is not going to happen as my time with my daughter is the most valuable to me and they're mad that I won't give her up. I've told them I'm willing to take

her as long as needed until they figure it out but obviously that was not taken well. Comment two. Wait a damn minute, so your baby daddy's wife was your ex-best friend? Were they having an affair when you were still with him? Boop. So we were never married we dated a long time and there is some speculation they might have been together when we were however they deny it but regardless the same day we broke up they were at her place together that night and she lied about it and they'd been together ever since so shady as a friend no matter whether during or not.

Comment three, you are much better person than me or just a soft touch. They have no right to dictate what goes in your home, just like you can't dictate what goes on in their home. I would put this under the category, not my problem. Boop. I've been trying really hard to be nice about it to not rock the boat since I don't want to deal with the coparenting when they're mad at me or whatever, but my patience really is wearing thin with how much it seems I'm supposed to just smile

and not especially when I've been super forgiving and accommodating about the past. I feel it's not fair to villainize me over this. Edit 1 They were both aware for a long time the end plan was to get Kat's ASAP. That's why she was going to start the shots. they were not blindsided by this plan and I told the wife when I got them and it was fine before they found out about the pregnancy. Edit 2.

Since for some reason I have to preface this, this was not in retaliation or out of spite or anything in that way towards wife. We just moved to a place that can have cats we couldn't at previous place and I have been wanting cats since before I even knew the dad in high school. I do not think about them when I'm not directly speaking to them so adopting cats was purely for the joy of me and my daughter not to cause problems. And again they knew this was happening and there were no issues and cats were adopted and they were informed they were before finding out she was pregnant and the plan was fine then so it was not me trying to make life harder for wife. Update 1. Thank you all so much for your feedback and suggestions. I'm not going to be giving many details as it's now going to court. I ended up offering to feed the special food a bunch of y'all suggested for allergies.

Thanks again, use sprays, quarantine clothes, etc. and they took to you. told me they are not willing to even try those. The only option is to get rid of them. The wife has now tried and failed, they couldn't find a judge to sign at Lowell, to put a restraining order on me that states if I don't get rid of my cats then I'm banned from seeing and having all contact with my daughter until I do. Obviously this is wildly excessive and I have an abundance of evidence and disprove the severity and her claims I'm trying to harm her on purpose. My daughter let it slip the wife's parents have cats that my daughter pets when they go to visit. Oops. But even more so when I talked to my psychiatrist about this at our last appointment,

she felt that my cats were necessary to my anxiety disorder. We have talked about me getting ESAs for a while now, so she wrote me a note and they are now officially my legal support animals. This should take care of the restraining order, however, I was also served with papers as many of you guests trying to take my daughter from me. Apparently the wife has been keeping a calendar of all the days I've had my daughter versus her. She started this calendar before they were even engaged. Wild, to try and show they should get my daughter since they had her more on paper. However, this is due to the fact I was needing to save up some money in order to put down the first and last month's rent, etc. at my new apartment so she offered to help as much as I need and

encouraged me to pick up extra shifts so that I would have my finances in order. She now is using those times she helped against me and saying I can't care for my daughter on my own with the job I have. I'm honestly sick to my stomach that I've tried so hard to be the bigger person, constantly put up with their shenanigans and crossing boundaries with a smile on my face for the sake of my daughter all to be once again stabbed in the back by the both of them. They don't really have a case and I have a lot more on them than they have on me so I'm not worried just disappointed that people are truly this evil even after you try to give them the benefit of the doubt. Comment where op has replied, why not get a restraining order? I don't know I have to ask my lawyer but honestly I'm scared of her for how psychotic she is. She's been trying to build a case to take my daughter away from me for a year and I've tried to be super nice and let her be involved in planning my daughter's birthday party.

That I had to have a talk with her afterwards about crossing boundaries that a girlfriend at the time shouldn't, have offered to take our dogs, my parents' dog and hers, to the dog parked together, invited her to zoo days, etc., all to try and help our relationship or at least I'd pretend some normalcy for my daughter's sake. The fact that during all of this she's had a smile on her face and here I am like an idiot thinking, okay, this is doable I can manage this, only to be hit out of left field that they've been plotting against me the whole time. Truly it's giving psychotic that she could just do that and not show any guilt. Comment one, custody is between you and baby daddy, not you and new wife. If he wants to be a good husband, then he should be able to do that.

Comment 2. She's not part of the custody agreement and her allergies don't dictate what you can and can't have in your house. Update 2. Thank you again everyone who has commented advice and support. This is going to be quick. We had court and the judge denied their case and had extremely harsh words for both of them. She told them it's not my responsibility to deal with her allergies at my house they need to come up with a solution on their end or relinquish his rights to me if it's truly that bad of an issue. She also told stepmom she's not a parent, should never be listed as such and need to back off. There was a whole lot more, but I'll just leave it with it was thrown out and I've been validated that I've been more than accommodating when it's not even my problem to deal with and my daughter can keep her cats. Thank you all again. I hope you enjoy this story.

Partner continuously assured commitment to marriage but never formally asked, so when I ultimately determined I no longer desired matrimony, he attempted to relocate with all my furnishings in tow. Sending me on a fake movie date to keep me away from our apartment. I, 33F, met up in a 10-year relationship with my boyfriend Carl, 33M. After the first year of our relationship, I made it very clear that I intended to be a wife someday. By the time I was 28 I started to remind him of my goals and expectations and Carl told me that while he knew he wanted to marry me, he just wasn't ready yet. Didn't like how I was pressuring him and called me controlling. Eventually we broke up, but six months later we got back together and even moved in.

Looking back on it now, I realized that that wasn't the best decision but I was so emotionally attached to this man and felt so invested that I was willing to go back to him. Carl and I have now been living together for four years and while I stopped being happy about it after the first six months, living with him isn't a bad experience. Plus I always thought that us getting married was just around the corner, because he said he was ready to commit to me but he wanted to wait for the right to be. time because I deserved a perfect proposal and a more stable husband. I'd been going to therapy for the past two years and recently had an epiphany. Since childhood I have always wanted a

wedding but never really gave much thought to being a married woman 24-7 and what that would mean. Given my country's shift in politics and new laws that politicians are trying to pass, I realize that not only am I fine with never getting married but I'm starting to lean more into no longer possessing the desire to do it. Since then it feels like I've been set free in a away and started focusing on myself. One of the major things that I've done is tell Carl that I'll no longer assist with babysitting his nephews and niece and instead focus more of my time into getting certified in something to increase my earning potential and just relaxing. Carl seemed nonchalant about it at first but then said that we needed to have a sit down

when I sent Carl's mom and his brother a text that they had three weeks before I stopped helping out completely. Carl said that while he understands my desire for more personal time, it's important to be there and sacrifice for family. I told him that he could switch around his own work schedule and help with the kids since they're technically his family, and he said that the children love me and that one day they'd be my family too once we were man and wife. It was in that moment that I told him that I no longer desired marriage and while I gave my reasons Carl still took it as me wanting to break up with him and or thinking that he would

make a terrible husband. That is not the case at all but he's starting to lash out and get suspicious and I just don't know what to do. How can I get my boyfriend to see that it's me not him? Comments where Op has replied, comment one, I am curious what Carl's mom and brother required your help with that you needed to give three weeks notice that you would no longer be helping with? Was it the niece and nephew's child care or something more? Boop.

Carl's brother has 50-50 custody of his children but child care after school is expensive where we live so his mom was initially watching the kids, but it was getting to be too much so I offered to help out and it's been that way for about three years. I don't feel right just quitting on something like this without notice and wanted to emotionally prepare the kids that they may not see me as often as before. Comment two, given my country's shift in politics and new laws that politicians are trying to pass, I realize that not only am I fine with never getting married but I'm starting to lean more into no longer possessing the desire to do it. What does this mean? Oop, I live in America and in one of the southern states. There are some politicians who want to put in laws that I personally don't think would be for my benefit.

in regards to marriage and if they're successful then I definitely never want to be married someone. Does Upp live close to her family or Carl's family for any additional support, help? Oop, we don't live close enough to my family for Carl to consistently offer any help on a regular basis. Downvoted comment three, Uta flat out. You string him along for 10 years with the goal to get married and now do a 180 without warning. Of course he gets suspicious. Also, you never said why he wasn't ready for marriage. Does he have financial problems?

Mental health issues he wanted to work on before? Also, it reads like you don't even see him as a partner anymore, but as a roommate. You just pulled the rug under him. Of course, it looks like a breakup. And I don't understand how people are defending you. You fucked up bad time. I would not be surprised at all if he packs his bags now and leaves. Oop, how was I string him along when he was the one who kept putting it off?

Also, what was there to warn him about? I can't speak for Carl as to why her never felt ready. I can only tell you what he told me. We've lived together for a couple years and he's never talked about having mental health or financial issues. I've noticed no change in his behavior either. I also made it very clear that while I no longer desired marriage I still wanted to be in the relationship.

So I don't know where breakup would come up. Comment four, do the two of you want children? If not, there's no reason to get married. Oop, I don't know what to call it, but I'm between wanting kids and being child-free. I could really go either way. Although given where I live in America right now, I would not give birth in the state that I live in. Update, hello everyone. Sorry for taking so long but a lot has happened and I ended up forgetting about this and focusing on other things.

Then I saw a notification from a recent DM, so I thought I'd give an update. Okay, so things were a little tense over the next few days because we were either fighting or just not talking to each other. He even moved into the spare bedroom one day and he stopped giving me money for his share of the streaming services that we both use and I technically pay for. I even but to mute his mama and brother for a little bit. Then once Valentine's Day was right around the corner he did a complete 180 and started speaking to me again and even apologized for his initial reaction and seemed really receptive to hearing my

reasons. He then he told me he planned a special day for us the weekend after Valentine's day which I was delighted to hear. On the day of I woke up to him gone but with breakfast laid out for me and a text message saying that there was work emergency and that he had to go in for a couple hours and told me to go meet him at the movie theater downtown by 3 p.m. I thought cool. I chilled for a bit then got ready and headed out. By 255,000. 5 p.m. I sent him a text message asking where he was and responded by saying he accidentally typed the wrong time and that the movie wouldn't start until 5 p.m. And he meant was that he wouldn't be able to leave work until 3 p.m. He's had a case of fat fingers and but dials before so I

initially didn't think much and just decided to go walking around by outlet close by to kill time. Then I got another text saying that he'd change our online ticket reservations because he was still stuck at the office and to just chill until 7 p.m. This time I grew suspicious but instead of calling or texting back with questions I just gave him a thumbs and sent a selfie of me at one of my favorite stores. Then started to drive back home. Normally getting back to our apartment from the downtown area where I was at around this time of day on a weekend can be a bit of a challenge but today traffic was decent. Then when I pull up to complex I see a moving truck. No big deal January-February is when a lot of people have moved out or and before so I understood. Why did I see some of Carl's friends

near the truck. Why did I see some of Carl's friend moving the couch that I paid for into the truck? I called the police and told them that I was actively being robbed. I stayed in the car for a while trying to calm myself down until I saw Carl helping a man load my bookshelf into the back of his pickup truck. I got out and confronted him. This man was trying to keep me out of the apartment all day so he could quietly move out and take my furniture. And I say my furniture because I was the one who picked it all out and paid for most of everything and I readily shared the email confirmation order number slash receipts that I had archived when the police showed up. The man tried to take my bookshelf because apparently Carl had sold it to him. But that wasn't my problem and that I'd

press charges on everyone if my stuff wasn't back in my place. We got into a huge argument and the police tried to brush this off as a civil matter since Carl and I lived together but I went into the station the next day and spoke to a female officer who was a better help. My dining room set, spices, blender, groceries, lamps, TV, coffee table, and mattress were gone, but Carl's friends did put back the couch, which was a pullout. The middleman between my landlord and me did speak to Carl about wanting to take his name off the lease but did not follow the proper protocol and confirming with me that I would take on full responsibility of rent so I did file a complaint. I ended up leaving the complex and moving somewhere else and press charges against

Carl and his friends if only to create a paper trail and help in my civil case against my ex. In the end, I was able to get some financial compensation for what I lost and he has until November to pay it all. I wasn't even sad that he didn't want to be with me anymore just pissed off at how he tried to go about it. It is very clear that he wanted to punish me and I'm so glad that I never ended up marrying this man. I completed my certification, got a promotion and the pay raise that comes with it, and my dad has agreed to give me the money he was saving for my future wedding as a down payment for house. After this entire experience I am now 10 toes down and never getting married. Also as a side note since Carl's brother couldn't provide consistent child care on his days,

the mother filed for full custody and now Carl's brother pays child support. Next story, fiancé and I decided to break up after years together because we lost our spark from being too busy with work but then COVID lockdown forced us to isolate together. My fiancé, 26F, and I, 27M, have been done. dating since college and as soon as we graduated I proposed to her. However, we decided to get married only once we're both financially stable and okay with our jobs. Two years down the road we've also been living together for that long, we now meet those requirements, however our love for each other disappeared. Or at least the spark we used to have. We became very busy.

Her with her graduate education plus job and me with my work. I admit I've been spending way too much time in the office and once I get home, I use my free time to get ahead with deadlines and stuff. She's also constantly stressed as she's juggling her education and her teaching job. We never had time for each other anymore, but we were still busy enough to even notice that. Then March came, she approached me with the subject and we had a long talk. It was an emotional one, we've known each other for so long after all, and we were reaching our end after so many years. She was already in the process of booking flights to stay with her parents for a while when the lockdown was announced. She decided to not go home anymore

in fear of possibly carrying the virus and infecting her family. I agreed with that decision, and since then we've been isolating together. We're both working from home now and she also finished her studies on April. Because of that, we've been having a lot of free time. At first, it felt a bit awkward. I didn't even know how to talk to her anymore. I got used to short and empty small talk with her. But she's always known how to get me out of my shell, so it didn't take too long before we were having full conversations once again. I just found out that she's had a newfound love for playing Sims 4. She showed me the family she was playing with currently, and I noticed that it was herself and, me, plus a dog and a cat whose names were our birth months,

LOL. She had been so shy initially, but she doesn't know that I was also feeling flustered then. I think this is the start of me questioning our decision to break up. After that, it was the small things. I also caught her up on how my life has been, like my Shty supervisor, how I haven't been taking care of my health lately, etc. And since then she started pushing me to work out with her and she's also been trying to get me into healthier options of food. I also came to find out new things about her in these months, which is surprising considering

how we've been together for many years now. These past few months have been really good. I felt like I was brought back to the times when we first met and I feel like a high schooler with a crush. The thing is, I'm not sure if I can trust my feelings right now. The only person I've had contact with was her, except for my frequent calls with family and friends, and I may be just having an infatuation right now. I also think we're lucky since we're both very free right now. But I keep thinking, what happens after the lockdown will we go back to being those busy people

that have too little time for each other. I also don't know how to approach her with this. She's always been the talker in our relationship, you know. But at the same time, I'm also afraid to talk about it and potentially ruin things for us right now. What if she doesn't feel the same? What if she's just treating me kindly because that's what she is? A genuinely kind person. The only hope I'm holding on to right now is the fact that she hasn't planned on going back to her family yet despite domestic travels being allowed in our country now. How do I go on about this? Comments where OPP has replied, comment one,

I think maybe try it while y'all are talking or playing a game or doing something together. Just say I don't think I want to break up anymore and that should get the conversation started. O'b, oh boy, I've honestly tried so many times to try and bring it up. We were playing Sims once and in my head I was yelling at myself to ask why she made our family in that game, but I could never get the words out. Instead I just went silent the whole time while she talked. Sci comment too, not to put too fine a point on it, but you not talking to her was a big part of the problem in the first place. Update 1, so the day after posting that, nothing really happened.

I spent that day reflecting on what kind of future I see and want with her. I also thought a lot about the past, how we messed it up, how we both got too lost in our jobs, etc. In my original post, I asked if what I'm feeling could be just to be just, an infatuation that would go as quickly as I came. But I realized that my feelings for her never really disappeared to begin with. It's like my heart just went in a deep sleep and I forgot how much feelings I carry for her. I think some of you may know, and have pointed out, that I'm not really good at communicating my feelings. I tend to keep things to myself, and my fiancé is one of the few people who can be patient with that. Some suggested to write a letter instead, or a note,

or marry her in Sims. I ended up with drafts of sappy letters that I ended up scraping in a sad attempt to recreate us in the Sims. But still, I wanted to make an effort to show her what I couldn't say through words. I've heard about her wanting a few DLCs in the Sims in the past, so I had the idea to buy a few for her. Sims DLCs are pretty expensive especially in our currency. Surprised her by stealing her laptop for a few hours and once I gave it back to her, she was elated and said, so happy. It was really nice seeing her get so excited over it. We played together that whole day and tried to solve the mystery in Strangerville, a game pack in The Sims. It was so fun. The next day, I found her in the kitchen trying to bake something. It was a blueberry cheesecake recipe she saw

on YouTube. I basically became her cooking assistant that day, helping her as much as I could and we ended up with a pretty decent outcome that I bet would have tasted better if I hadn't messed up so much. She still said she had so much fun and loved the cheesecake though. The next day, which is just yesterday, something important happened. We were basically just snuggled up on the couch playing when our Sims just autonomously tried for baby in the bed. It was hilarious and we initially laughed about it, but then we got pretty silent. She then closed her laptop and hugged me tightly then, without saying anything. I think that was my realization that, oh, she feels the same as I do.

So I knew I had to speak up. I'm still impressed at myself for managing to talk yesterday without choking up, basically opening up the conversation like, are you planning to go to your parents soon? And she said no, she doesn't feel like it yet. I asked her why, she told me she wanted to stay. I told her I wanted her to stay too. We went to sleep that night just huddled together.

And even though we didn't really explicitly say it, I think we're now aware of each other's feelings and it feels like a really huge improvement to me. Earlier we ate breakfast together. We weren't as chatty as we've been the last few months, but the silence was comforting. We also watched Knives out together. We haven't had the conversation yet, but I'm going to bring it up to her tonight. I'm really glad this whole ordeal went much nicer than I expected it would and I'm relieved I didn't let my doubts get the best of me. Though I still have to get better with how I communicate things, I'm going to learn for her. Thank you to everyone who left nice.

comments in my original post. Update 2. Okay, hi. I posted this thinking the same people who saw my last post would respond. And seeing that a few users wanted an update back then, I thought what the hell, why not give them a little update right now and leave it at that? Now I have 5x more the audience I had the last time. Right now my fiancé is sleeping next to me. Yes, we had the talk. As soon as I posted this, I logged. out and gathered myself so I can tell her what's been in my mind for months. It's not really something so exciting. We basically just sat down together and talked about what went wrong before.

I told her the things I said in my last post, and she admitted to worrying about what happens after the lockdown gets fully lifted too. We both acknowledged that we work too hard to become financially stable so that we can get married. Right now, though, all we could do is promise and talk about how we're going to manage our time better, since we have no idea if our country is ever going to return to normal, the curve is not getting flattened at all and the quarantine is about to get extended again. And then we talked about our feelings. I got to tell her I love her again, for the first time in years probably, and she told me the same. After that it was back to a lighter conversation. We basically just bonded until she fell

asleep. I honestly thought only a handful of people would see my post. I made sure to use Reddit because this isn't really a big platform in our country and I was sure she wouldn't see this post, but now that there are like 20K up votes as I'm typing this, I think she might stumble upon this post sooner or later. Well then, I know she's going to be whining a lot about this, but she'd be glad to know that a lot of people found our relationship wholesome. Thank you all for the kind comments. I know some people are thinking why haven't you done? just talked to her in the first place, but getting some perspective from other people really did help give a push. I think if I left myself alone with the thoughts I was having, things would

have gone a lot worse, so I'm really grateful. I'm not sure what I'm going to do with the awards I received since this is just a throwaway account though, but it's still cool. I'll try to answer as many questions as I can and then log out. Thank you again, smile comment where op has replied, Comment, beautiful. So happy for you. Please, remember this story later in your life. I've been married for over 10 years. There are times like this in every long-term relationship, when you just aren't feeling the same level of connection and love for each other.

It could be because you're too busy or because you have some kind of significant trial that gets in the way. You can avoid some of these barriers, but not all of them. You have to agree to stay together through some lows, knowing that your relationship has the strength to come back. You have to be deliberate about making ways to build your connection and show love for each other. You have to agree to be kind to each other, to always see each other as beautiful human beings, even when you don't feel the same level of connection. If you can do that, you have the capacity to have a beautiful, rewarding, long-term relationship.

Wishing you the best. Oop, thank you for this. When we broke up, we really thought it was for the best. It was a mutual thing. We talked about this earlier and she admitted that she felt guilty since she was the one who brought it up so she thought she was responsible for our breakup. I made sure to tell her that's not the case. I can see now that we both didn't try hard enough. I know other people have had it hard during this quarantine, but I guess we're really lucky that we found a way to turn this bad thing into an eye-opening experience for the both of us.

I hope you enjoy this story. Relatives declined to transport me to the medical facility when I began experiencing childbirth because they were dining with my spouse's affluent partner, so we chose to sever ties with them. Off from meeting their grandchild. Hi, so sorry for any mistakes and stuff, I'm in a bit of a hurry, but I'll try to explain the situation to the best of my abilities. So I, 27F, had a baby with my husband Nate, 28M, last week. We dated for three years and got married two years back.

I've known as family for the past five years, and since my parents live out of six. and my dad has a lot of health problems, they were the one supposed to drive me to the hospital when I went into labor if my husband was not around. We had already discussed it, they had agreed to it, and given my relationship with them, I had no reason to think that they wouldn't show up. We've had a fairly normal relationship, but I don't know what happened. Last week, when I went into labor, my husband was unavailable. It was about three weeks before my due date, so in all fairness, I don't blame him because we were not expecting it. When my water broke, I started trying to call him but unfortunately, it just went straight to voicemail.

Later on, he told me he was in a very important client meeting, and the location had really poor reception. But anyway, we had planned for this, so the next thing that I did was call my in-laws when I realized that he was probably not going to be able to pick up my calls anytime soon. When I called them, they didn't pick up either the first few times, but I just kept calling until my mother-in-law finally answered the phone. She sounded really annoyed, but I told her about my situation and said that I wanted to start heading to the hospital now. But instead of telling me that they would be here, they told me that I needed to wait until the contractions were

fewer seconds apart and then, they would show up. Right now, they were busy because they were meeting my sister-in-law's boyfriend for the first time and they couldn't just get up and leave. For context, my sister-in-law, Lily, 23F, has only been with this guy for six years. months and I'm sure that they could have lunch with him later on as well, and forgive me if I'm sounding arrogant, but I'm pretty sure that me going into labor was a bigger deal than meeting him. I tried to tell them that I didn't want to wait, but they told me that it was fine, the baby could wait and they just needed to finish this lunch and then, they would be here. At the time, they had literally just placed their order, so it was obviously going to take a much longer time

for them to get their food, finish it and then drive to my house. Add to that the time that it would take for them to drive me from my house to the hospital. I did the math, and I realized that I just couldn't afford to count on them, so I tried to call my husband a few more times, but when he didn't respond, I decided to just drive myself to the hospital instead. The contractions were still bearable, so somehow, I was able to make it in time before it got worse. Once I was there, all checked in, I just waited for anyone to call me back in about two hours later. My husband finally did call me back. I told him every day. including the bit about my in-laws refusing to show up, and he told me that he would be there.

Within another two hours, he was by my side and by then, I was properly in labor, so I had no time to think about my in-laws or anyone else. I had the baby several hours later, and we were too happy to discuss anything about his parents. My in-laws, by the way, never ended up showing up anyway. They called my husband up two days later, asking if everything had gone well with the delivery, making excuses about how they had forgotten because they were just so caught up with lunch. I don't understand how anybody can even just forget about the birth of their grandchild, but whatever. Nate had been waiting for that phone call, and when they called, they really had it from him. He told him that they were irresponsible and self-centered, and said that he had never expected

them to do something like this. But now that it had happened, they could say goodbye to any chance. of having a relationship with their grandchild. Because now the only grandkid would have anything to do with was Lily's baby, whenever she had a kid, and that's definitely not happening in a while. Then, he blocked them, and literally just a few minutes later, I started receiving a bunch of texts from my in-laws and Lily, saying that I shouldn't have snitched for no reason. They're saying that I've overreacted and that this really wasn't a big deal,

because ultimately, nothing really happened. So I replied to them, telling them, telling them that that's not the point at all. The point was that they had committed to something, and at the very last minute, they totally appointed me by not showing up and even after that, they didn't even have the common courtesy to apologize

and were pretending as if this was all fine. Besides, this was serious, this involved the birth of my child, and I was not going to forgive them for this. I told them that my husband had said exactly what I felt, and they really don't deserve to be around their grandkid if they don't respect their grandkid's mom. But they're still insisting that we are overreacting, and even though I don't agree,

I just wanted to make sure that we are in the right here. So Ida for not allowing my in-laws to see their grandchild after they refused to help me? Update 1, thanks for all the comments, it means a great deal to me. Nate and I had a chat about whatever we were told, and we decided that we were just going to stick to whatever we had decided. They don't deserve to be around my baby, period. When they needed to help me out, they turned their backs on me, they can't seriously expect me to forget about that so soon, especially considering the fact that they haven't even apologized or shown me that

they are sorry for what they did. So how do I even forgive people who are not even sorry? I can't and very frankly speaking, I don't even want to. I had already been 80% convinced that we were not in the wrong here, but after reading the comments, I realized just how wrong they were for doing what they did. Now that I think about it, I can't even wrap my head around how they could be so heartless. It wasn't even like we had ever had a bad relationship, so I don't know where this came from. Even Nate is quite confused. We don't know why this happened, but the bottom line is that it did happen. I blocked them all as well and now, they don't have any way to get through to us. It's a good thing because both of us are very busy with our child at the moment. Newborns can really be a

handful. And honestly, we don't have the time for this sort of drama. It's meaningless, it's not going to lead to anything and so, we don't want to engage in it. If you want to keep trying to get in touch with us and keep guilt-tripping us, they are completely welcome to do that, but they are seriously delusional if they expect us to respond to them at any point. So far, they haven't tried again, but then again, it's just been a couple of days since we blocked them. So I'm pretty sure that if you just give it some time, they are going to try harder. Because I know that they are all very keen on keeping the family together, so they won't be able to stand it if we end up cutting them off permanently. But that's what's happening, and whether they can accept that or not is really none of our concern.

I thought that Nate was going to be a lot more disappointed that his parents are not going to be a part of our lives right now, but honestly, I don't think that he cares about anything more than the baby at the moment. So that's a huge relief because I really didn't want to get caught up in some sort of weird family drama. Anyway, speaking of family, my parents are flying out to meet us in the next few days. And I'm keeping my fingers crossed that whatever my in-laws have to try, they just wait it out until my parents are here because I don't want them to trouble my dad. He already has a lot of problems with health that he has to deal with. This is the last thing that he would need when he's coming over to meet his grandchild. So I hope they can stay away. Update 2. So my parents are finally here,

landed last evening and they're going to be staying with us for the next couple of days. And I'm really grateful for it because I could really use the extra pair of hands with my baby. I'm on maternity leave right now, but my husband still has to work from home so he can't help out as much as he would like to. So my mom's helping me out, and thankfully, whatever drama my in-laws have to create, they have restricted themselves to online means for now. So my dad is not getting in trouble. For everyone who is asking, he has a lot of heart problem. it's been an issue for a couple of years and we really don't like stressing him out. And it's very easy to stress him out, especially when it has anything to do with me.

We haven't even told them anything about the whole situation with my in-laws, because I know that my dad will be furious if he finds out how my in-laws refused to drive me to the hospital. And like I said, we really don't want him sweating this. So for the next couple of days, for as long as he's here, we are not going to talk about any of that. But that doesn't mean that my in-laws have refrained from creating drama, they are still going strong. Like I said, they are restricting themselves to online means. They've created a bunch of burner profiles on social media and they are using those to contact us, tell us how we are making a mistake, and say that they had their reasons to stay at the lunch

instead of driving me to the hospital and that I shouldn't hold that against them because at the end of the day, it's not like they did something bad to their grand kid or something. I don't even understand why they just won't get the point. that it's not about them having done something bad, it's about them not sticking to what they had committed to. They had been very inconsiderate and selfish, and whatever reasons they had, I really didn't care about it.

Because this was important to me, and they should have been important to them as well if they cared about their grandchild so much. From the looks of it, it seems like they want to care about their grandchild right now because he's in this world. But they couldn't care less about the way he was brought into it, not about the person who brought him into it either.

They had promised us that they would be there for me if my husband happened to be unavailable at the time that I went into labor, and they had every opportunity to be there for me, but they actively chose not to do so. And that's unforgivable, so Nate and I really don't care what sort of reasons they have for any of this, it just doesn't matter. No reason is going to excuse this and I'm going to keep them away from my family for as long as I need to. If that makes me the bad guy, or if that makes me somebody who is overreacting, then fine, so be it. But right now, I know that I don't need them around, Nate doesn't want them around, and my parents also don't want them around. I'm just lucky that they haven't asked about it yet, but if they do, I'm just going to make up something. Anyway, I'm just glad that they are not showing up in person because that's really the last thing that I want. I think Nate and I have enough on our plate already, without having them add to it.

Update 3. Okay, so my parents were here for a week, but they had to fly back yesterday because they they have their own work and life as well. But it was really nice to have them here, even if it was just for a week. They told us that they are going to try and visit by the end of the month again, so I'm looking forward to that. It was nice to have my mom helping me out, but now that she's gone, Nate has promised me that he's going to try and cut down on his work a little so he can help me out.

Thankfully, we have been very diligent with our savings for the past couple of years, so we can afford to be a little laid back right now. are going well for us, his family hasn't contacted us in a while. They kept trying to reach out to us initially, like I had said, but for the past couple of days, I guess they took the hint and decided to leave us alone. And as I had expected, my parents did ask me about my in-laws and why they were not visiting, because they had found it really confusing. I considered telling my dad the truth, but in the end, I just told him that they were out on vacation at the moment, and they were going to be back later. He found it a little weird, but he didn't question it, so we got off easy.

But when I said the same thing to my mom, she saw through my lives pretty easily and she told me that she knew that something must have happened and that's why they were not coming over. Because given how they are always talking about family and family values, and keeping everyone together and all that stuff, she said that she found it hard to believe that people like that had chosen to stay on vacation rather than come back home to see their grandchild. And of course, There was no hiding it from her, so I told her the truth. She was just as surprised as I had been, and she told me that I had made the right call by not telling my dad, because he definitely would have freaked out and given my in-laws

a piece of his mind. And that would have just stressed him out even more, so it was probably better not to give him a reason at all. As for our reaction to the whole thing, she told us that we had done exactly the right thing. She told me that if she had had had the opportunities that they had had, then she definitely would have made sure that she was there for her done. daughter-in-law's delivery, especially when we had specifically asked him to be there for us. And they had agreed to it, in spite of that, they couldn't be bothered to show up just because they

were having lunch with Lily's boyfriend, as if that was more important than anything else in the world. It was just a lunch. They could have just excused themselves and come over to my aid, but clearly, I was not a priority for them. My mom was actually pretty disappointed that she couldn't have been here for me, but I told her that it was completely fine, because I knew that she had to take care of my dad and that it was not possible for them to fly out here, especially when they didn't even know when my due date was going to be. They had plans of coming over around the time of my due date, but unfortunately, I gave birth earlier so it wasn't possible for them. And I don't blame them at all, this is just how life works. But it was not the same for my in-laws. They had a chance and they

believed it and now they're going to have to face the consequences. I was feeling a bit weird about the fact that I hadn't even given them a chance to explain, because they kept insisting in their messages that they had their reasons, but it was my mom who convinced me that I didn't need to feel guilty about any of that. Because at the end of the day, they hadn't been there for me, and that was that. That was all that I needed to know. She's the one who told me that no matter what reasons they could possibly have had, it didn't matter because we were already pretty sure that they couldn't have been serious reasons because otherwise, we would have known. And if they were not anything serious, then they were just not excuses. It was as simple as that. So that's what I'm choosing to go by

and I'm definitely not engaging with them right now. Update 4. Okay, so it's been two weeks and we had pretty much forgotten about the whole thing with my in-laws. We were completely focused on our son and this new lifestyle, so we really didn't have time to sit and think about them. We had almost moved on from the thing but then they turned up today. At around nine in the morning, literally, Literally while we were in the middle of breakfast, they started ringing the doorbell incessantly, and when we checked, it was the three of them standing outside with a bunch of gifts and bouquets and balloons. I don't know what they were expecting.

They probably thought that if they showed up with their gifts and stuff, we were going to melt and let them in. But I remembered everything, and so did Nate. So we opened the door and told them that we didn't need any of this, and we would just appreciate it if they just left us alone. When they had the chance to help us and be nice to us, they blew it, so now, we didn't need all this pretense. And for some reason, his mom started speaking to me like people speak to little kids, cajoling, and stuff. She told me that she knew that I was mad, and that I had every right to be, but they were only human, and everyone made mistakes.

So they were allowed one mistake, and we had all already wasted a lot of time being mad at each other, so it was better for us to just try and move on from whatever had happened because that was what was going to be good for their grandson in the long run. Her tone was very condescending, and I actually didn't know what to say because I was so surprised. Nobody had ever spoken to me like that like I was five years old, and I needed to be spoken to like a toddler. So Nate told her to cut it out because we were not at daycare and she was not my babysitter, so she didn't need to speak to me like that in that tone because it was just really weird. And he also told her that whatever was good for our son, we were a better fit to decide that, as the parents. They had lost the right to call themselves the grandparents the day that they

refused to drive me to the hospital. So now, all this was pointless. And his parents started bickering with him, saying that we were taking this way too far now and that it had already been a few weeks so we should have just forgiven them by now and moved on. But clearly, we just wanted to drag it out and keep making them feel like they had committed a sin or something when, in reality, it wasn't even that big of a deal. They said that not only were we overreacting, we were also not even being considered of our son because purposely depriving a child of their grandparents and aunts love out of nothing but spite is just really petty behavior. That was the point at which I snapped, and I told them that we do not even owe them an answer for that. And I said that they

needed to get out of here, or else I really would be calling the cops on them and then, they would be sorry about everything. I also informed them that my child was not going to be deprived of anyone's love, our love and affection were going to be enough for him, and clearly, they didn't value him enough when he was being born, so we didn't need them to stick around anymore. Especially considering the fact that they never even thought it was important to apologize to me, and all they have done until now is accuse me of snitching and overreacting and all that. They were shocked because I was yelling at them, I'm usually not one to start screaming at people, but I had just had it with them because they were really getting on my nerves now. As if it was not bad enough that they had

refused to hold up their promise to me, they still have the audacity to keep showing up and try to make me feel like the bad guy. And seeing how worked up I was getting, Nate also told them to leave, or else we would be forced to call the cops and we really didn't want to do that. Everything got a bit loud and heated, and because of that, my son woke up and I decided to attend to him in the crib. Thankfully, he was in the living room, not too far away, so I could still hear everything that was going on. Nate's parents and sister were trying to reason with him, and of course, the only way they could think of doing that was by making me the bad guy here. They said that I was pregnant, so I was obviously hormonal and emotional, and he should keep his head on straighten the situation

and try to think about things from their perspective as well. They just said, just did not want to seem rude and disrespectful to Lily's boyfriend, whom they were meeting for the first time ever, and that was the only reason why they had missed the birth. And they insisted that later on, they had just forgotten about it as if we were going to buy any of that. You don't just forget that your daughter-in-law is giving birth and your first grandchild is about to be born. And it is very unlikely that all three of them had forgotten at the same time, so they skipped it on purpose, and that was the fact of the matter. They kept trying to argue, and Nate kept trying to drive them away, until finally, he took out his phone and said that he was going to call the cops because he was just sick and tired of them. When he did that, that was finally when they left, cursing at him, telling him that he was an ungrateful son, and that they were never going to forgive him for this. But he couldn't care less, after they left, he just made a beeline for me and the baby and we spent the rest of the afternoon in silence because we had had enough activity for the day.

Right now, he's playing with the baby and I'm typing this out and we have spoken about what we are going to do the next time that they decide to show up. We are just going to call the cops, plain and simple because they don't deserve the benefit of the doubt. The only reason we had not called the cops today right off the bat was because we did not want to create a scene. We live in a nice neighborhood, cops are not very common here, so we wanted to maintain our dignity, but screw that. I'm just so done with them that I can't even bring myself to think about them anymore. I guess I'll be taking a couple of days off from posting here because I just really need to take a break now. But thank you, everyone, who has continued to comment and support me. It really means a great deal to us.

Update 5, hi, so it's been three weeks since my last update, and my family and I are doing really well. My mom is back here, along with my dad, and she's going to be. helping me out for the next week or so. We are also looking for a nanny because, in a couple of months, I'll have to go back to work as well. I'm really happy to have her because with her, I can also discuss everything that has happened with my in-laws. Nate doesn't really want to talk about it, and understandably so, because he's quite embarrassed of the way his family has behaved. They sent us an email a couple of days ago, probably last week, and of course, they did not bother to apologize, but they did provide an explanation as to why they had chosen to have lunched that day

instead of coming to me. So apparently, this guy that Lily is dating, he's extremely rich, and I'm talking millionaire rich because he's the eldest son of a really successful industrialist, and they said this lunch was very important for them because they wanted him to have a good first impression of them. He and Lily have been getting pretty serious, and they are thinking about getting married next year. They've already been together for six months, and they plan on being married by the time they've completed two years together. So of course, this was a very important discussion to have, and they couldn't have delayed it because had it been some normal guy, they could have easily left in the middle of lunch so they could come to me. But this was an extremely

wealthy guy that we were talking about, so naturally, they couldn't help but be extremely shallow as well. I don't know why, I guess they really thought that this was going to be the explanation that we wanted to hear, and we would instantly forgive him. But if anything, it just made me feel really disgusted with them. Because of all the talk about family, being important, family, values, and all that, this is clearly not what they live by. Because if they actually valued their family, they would have been there for me. They would have been there for their son's partner, for their future grandchild. But they chose money, they chose to impress some guy they had just met over me. So all that talk about family values, it's obviously just rubbish.

They don't actually believe in it, they just say all that crap to make themselves appear better. Anyway, I really don't want to talk about them anymore. I have spoken to my dad as well, we finally told him the truth because he was asking about them, and there was no way that we could lie to him this time as well. Surprisingly, he was pretty laid back about it and said that since we had already dealt with them, he didn't feel the need to engage with them anymore. He also told me that he was really proud of me for standing up for myself and cutting toxic people out of my life, regardless of whether they were family or whatever.

And he seems extremely fond of my husband, even more than he used to be before, which I didn't even think was possible. But I guess the fact that Nate stood up against his own family for my sake just makes him even more endearing and I'm glad to see that my father and his son-in-law are bonding so well. Everyone's happy, everyone's well and this is exactly what I wanted since the beginning. I hope you enjoy this story. sibling continued to boast about her previous romance with my soon-to-be spouse during my wedding celebrations, so when he eventually lost his temper and labeled her as fixated and unsettling at the pre-wedding meal, my dad said he wouldn't walk me down the aisle unless we apologized.

So, last evening there was an incident at my rehearsal dinner and I'm getting married tomorrow. So, I really need some urgent insight on the situation right now. For context, the guy that I'm 28, female, marrying, my fiancé Jake, 28, male, had a fling with my half-sister Maddie, 26, female, like six years ago. They met on some dating app and went out on a couple of dates which ultimately ended in nothing. Then about two years later, he met me through friends and we hid it off and we started dating. It was not until later that we found out about his connection with Maddie. But honestly, that was just a few dates and nothing really happened.

So, it didn't bother us too much. Besides, I'm not very close to Maddie. I don't see her very often and honestly if it was not for my dad I wouldn't even have a relationship with her. So, it was really not a big deal. But even then I didn't want to invite her to the wedding. However, my dad kind of talked me into it and unfortunately I didn't want to fight with him, so I just agreed.

And Maddie was invited to the wedding and she's been absolutely insufferable about it. She was at the engagement party as well and at the pre-wedding. events and she keeps milking her past relationship with Jake as if it were actually something very meaningful. She doesn't stop bringing it up whether she's joking about it or not. She's just talking about it constantly. And I thought I would ignore it and she would stop. But after a while it became very clear that she was just trying to belittle me somehow. And this was just how she was trying to put me down by playing up the kind of relationship she shared with Jake. It was annoying for him as well, but I really did not want any drama before my wedding.

So I thought that I would let it go together. Both of us had decided that we would not talk about it and we would just ignore her and hope that she would have some self-respect and stop talking about it because clearly she was not being acknowledged. But then at the rehearsal dinner, she made some stupid joke that I don't even remember about her relationship with Jake and how he used to be back then and he just lost it. He snapped at her and told her that there was a reason he stopped seeing her

and she got dumped and that was because she was extremely annoying. And he remembers how she used to be so clingy and obsessive because just after the first two dates she had started talking about marriage and stuff even though both of them were pretty young back then. And not just that, he even brought up how he found her creepy because a few days after their last date, she had decided to call his mother up even though they had barely even known each other for a few months. And he was obviously not ready to introduce her to his parents.

But she took it upon herself and that was a little. why he stopped seeing her because she had overstepped her boundary and even now she was doing the same thing because she just couldn't take the hint. He told her that she reeks of insecurity and so there was something wrong with her and at that point she started crying really loudly and ran out of the room. My dad went after her and it was pretty obvious that he was very upset with both of us. But I think they did what had to be done. After that, we haven't seen her because she's refused to come out of her room in the hotel. And just a couple of hours ago, my dad asked me and Jake to come to his room and told us that

he had decided that since we had upset Maddie, we would have to apologize or else he would not be attending the wedding or walking me down the aisle. I thought that was really unfair and I got into a horrible fight with him, but I really don't want this right now because I'm literally getting married tomorrow. I know that my dad thinks that Jake and I are the bad guys here, but I just don't see it. But I also don't want him to skip the wedding. So I'd offer allowing my fiancé to insult my half-sister at my rehearsal dinner before our wedding. Edit.

Okay. So, I didn't mention a lot of things about my family dynamic in my post because I didn't think it was relevant in the situation, but I'll just give you guys some more context. So, basically, my parents did not get along well. Well, they were married. They dated in college and they only got married. because my mom got pregnant with me and they were under a lot of pressure from their families. From what I know, the pregnancy was very difficult as it is. And my parents realized that they didn't love each other very much.

When I was three years old, my mom cheated on my dad with one of her friends and that was the end of their marriage. She came clean to him and they filed for divorce. They co-parented me until I was an adult. And when I was 15, my grandparents told me everything. When I was one, my dad started dating one of his friends from high school. And soon enough they had Maddie. Even though we were pretty close in age and we were half-sisters, Maddie, and I didn't see each other much because my dad only had me for the weekends and I guess she was jealous of me or something.

Anyway, the point is growing up I didn't really have a good relationship with her. I didn't see much of her and in our adult lives we only have to see each other when it's absolutely unavoidable. But other than that, we don't have a relationship. My mom, unfortunately, passed away a couple of years ago. So, right now, I only have my dad. And regardless of how their marriage was, both of them did their best to raise me. So, obviously, I do value my dad a lot in my life. Besides, even when we were younger, he never made me feel like I was less important to him than Maddie. In fact, he has told me several times that he would have loved to have me with him for more than just the weekend. But unfortunately, my mother wouldn't allow that, and she had

initially wanted full custody of me, but my dad wasn't fine with that. So, it had already taken them a lot to come to a custody agreement that the two of them could come to terms with. He didn't want to drag it out further. Anyway, the point is, regardless of what's going on with Maddie, I do have a good relationship with my dad otherwise, and I don't want that to be ruined. Edit 2. Hi. So, I just want to clarify a couple more things. There are a lot of people in the comments bashing my mother for whatever happened. I just want to say I don't think that I have the right to say that she was a perfect human being like everyone else. She had her flaws, but neither was my father perfect. They had their problems. And even though she was the one who had

cheated, even my father agrees that he was the one who drove her to it. He was horrible to her for most of her pregnancy, he ignored her, and he knew the kind of pressure that she was under from her parents because they were kind of conservative and wouldn't tolerate it if she decided to get a divorce. So he took advantage of that and took her for granted. She had her issues. She picked fights with him over the smallest of things and he made it a point to not help out in any of the household chores and stuff and made her do all the work and stayed out until late every day. And it was basically torture for both of them because they were punishing each other. I mean, I'm not saying that cheating was the right solution, but I think the situation was not that easy for her either.

And as for the reason why she decided to file for full custody and wasn't willing to give up more than the rest of the weekend for my father, it was because she was upset with him since he decided to start seeing another woman while they were still in the process of getting divorced. And he was fighting her pretty hard on the amount of alimony and child support he would be paying even though he knew that she hadn't been able to. able to work because she got pregnant right out of college and then she got married. So, she really didn't have anything of her own at that point in time. And since her parents were not supporting her either, she had had to rely on her friends to even pay for the lawyer. So, things were already pretty bad between the two of them. And I'm only saying that things were incredibly messy for the two and I honestly cannot say

who was right and who was wrong or whatever. Update 1. Hey, so it's around 6 o'clock in the evening. right now and since last evening, my father, and I have not spoken after we've fought about the situation with Maddie. My fiancé and I have had a discussion. We've gone through the comments and stuff and we've talked about it with our friends and everyone thinks we don't owe anybody an apology because Maddie had pretty much been getting on everybody's nerves. Everyone has just been too kind to say anything because they did not want to start any drama. But she was obviously asking for the negative kind of attention and she got it. So now she can't be.

complaining about the consequences of her own actions. That's just not fair. Besides, it makes sense for my father to demand that Jake apologized to Maddie. But I don't understand why he thinks that I should apologize. In fact, if anything, she's the one who should be apologizing to me right now because she's the one who created all this drama just because she wanted attention. She also knows for a fact that there was practically nothing to talk about when it comes to her relationship with Jake. They just went out on a couple of dates six years back. Nothing came out of it and that was it. It meant nothing to him. And I'm pretty sure that it meant nothing to her either until she found out that I was marrying this guy. Then all of a sudden, she couldn't stop talking about it.

And everything that Jake had said was actually true. Everyone in his friend's circle knows her as the obsessive girl he went out with. And they had made a whole joke out of it back when it actually happened. Even his mother remembers her, but everybody was kind enough not to bring it up because they did not want to embarrass her. So, I don't understand how when so many allowances had been made for her, she still had the audacity to keep bringing this up just to put me down and be an attention seeker. If my dad cannot see that, then I don't know what to say to him. I don't understand why he thinks that we owe her an apology, but we really don't. So, I'm going to tell him that if he wants to come to the wedding and walk me down the aisle, then he's welcome to do so.

And if not, he and Maddie can leave. Obviously, it's not ideal, but it's my wedding day for God's sake. I'm not going to allow anybody to ruin it with their temper tantrums. Not even my father. It's a big enough deal that I invited Maddie just to be kind because he wanted me to honor the relationship that I had with her as a sister. He was actually even pushing for me to invite his wife, but that was where I drew the line because I knew that my mom wouldn't have liked that.

Anyway, the point is because he asked me to, I invited her. But if he thinks I'm going to let her do whatever she wants and walk all over us, then I'm sorry, but that's just not going to happen. Update 2. Hey, so after I made the post a couple of hours ago, my fiancé and I went over to my dad's room and we told him that if he does not want to attend the wedding and does not want to walk me down the aisle, then he's free to leave with Maddie. but given the current circumstances, neither Jake nor I feel particularly inclined to apologize to her. And in fact, we would really appreciate it if she left. I told him that I had thought about it and it was very obvious that Maddie had been trying to put me down throughout the time that she had spent here. Everyone had noticed it. It was not just something that I had made up in my own head.

So, there was no point in him trying to defend her. All our friends, couple of my cousins, and even my in-laws agreed that Maddie's behavior had been very strange. And whatever happened at the rehearsal dinner, it was whatever frustration had been building up because of her behavior. So, she can't pretend that it was all our fault. Besides, everything that had been said was true. So, I don't think that we need to apologize for any of that. If she had just kept her mouth shut like a normal guest and being dignified instead of being so much of an attention seeker, then nobody would have had to say anything at all. So, while we could agree that Jake had been very rude, he had his reasons. And neither of us

thought that he should apologize. I told my father that I would have really loved for him to be there for my wedding and for him to have walked me down the aisle because now that my mom's not around anymore, he's my only living parent. So, it would have meant a lot to me. But if he thinks that he does not want to be here, I can't force him. So, he's free to leave. And even though it may be, me very sad to say that, I still got it all out somehow with as much dignity as I had. After hearing me out, my dad started telling me that he had said all that in the heat of the moment. And it was just because he did not want anybody to hurt his daughters. He sounded very dejected and I felt like he had also thought about everything that had happened and probably

had had a change of heart. Once we were done talking, he told both Jake and me that he was the one who was wrong and that we shouldn't have had to apologize for anything because we didn't start anything last evening. He was just very shocked at all the information that had come out because he had had no idea about any of this. He also said that he had noticed that Maddie had been acting very strangely throughout the whole thing, but he didn't make much of it, which he probably should have. Anyway, I just really made him very upset that Jake spoke to her that way. And he told me that was because his father instinct kicked in. And if anybody had spoken to me that way, he would have reacted the same way. But even then, it was not his place to say anything

because he was not fully aware of the situation. And so he wanted to apologize to both of us and he said he was really sorry for ruining everything before the wedding. In all honesty, I was just glad that he had realized his mistake and I told him that it was not his fault. But the person who had actually ruined the wedding would really want her to leave because I hadn't even wanted her here in the first place. I had only invited her because of him. and she decided to stir up so much drama out of nothing. The best thing would be for her to leave. And I know that would probably make him upset, but it had to be done.

And that's when he told us that he had asked her to leave this morning itself. And that's apparently why he hadn't contacted us throughout the entire day. He had wanted to speak to us and apologize earlier, but he was just busy dealing with Maddie first. He had spent the entire morning trying to get her to apologize to us because even though he had stood up for her last evening, he realized that in the end it was actually her fault and he had gotten a little too defensive. So he tried to get her to apologize first, but when that did not work and she started fighting with him, he told her that I was just as important to him as she was and he was not going to let her ruin my wedding. So she needed to leave

and that led to them fighting for a couple of more hours. So by the time he was done and had seen her off, he was exhausted. Thankfully though, we reached out to him and spoke to him and we were all able to sort things out before the wedding. Update 3. Hi everyone. So about a week ago, I got married to Jake and it still feels surreal to even say that, but it happened. And luckily, after everything was sorted out, my dad and I had a talk right before the ceremony before he was about to walk me down the aisle, and he apologized for his behavior, and I forgave him. Besides, it was supposed to be the happiest day of my life. I didn't want to think about anything else at that point in time. At the end of the day, what mattered to me the most was that he had realized his

mistake and that even though he had had had a knee-jerk reaction, he had tried his best to correct himself afterwards. I know that a lot of people in the comments said that I was too quick to forgive him. But honestly, I couldn't afford to waste more time mulling over it. Like I had said in the beginning itself, it was an urgent situation. I was getting married the very next day. I couldn't afford to sit around and think about whether I wanted him at my wedding or not. I had already thought about it and I knew that it would be incomplete without my dad. So, I knew for a fact that I wanted him at my wedding and if he was apologizing, then I did not see the harm in forgiving him. And also, let's not forget the fact that even though he took Maddie's side initially, that was just because that was his instant impulse.

And I guess I can't complain because that is his daughter as well. However, later on he did ask her to apologize and when she didn't, he asked her to leave as well. So, I think he was really sorry and was not just saying it for the sake of it. Besides, from what I've heard from him in the past couple of days, it's not like he hasn't had to pay for it. His wife is furious about whatever happened at the wedding. She was already pretty upset because she hadn't been invited and she thought that it was a huge insult, but I don't really know why she expected to be invited in the first place. Neither she nor her daughter had been very nice to me in the past.

They mostly just pretended I didn't exist whenever I would come over. They wouldn't talk to me. They wouldn't even look at me. And it was very obvious that I was not welcome in their house. She claimed that she had opened up her home to me, but it was just the weekends. And I'm pretty sure that she didn't like me staying with them even for weekends. And if it had been up to her, she would have made my dad give up custody of me altogether. So why would I want a person like that at my wedding?

Besides, my mom didn't like her, so that was another reason for me, too. Anyway, she was already pretty upset about not being invited to the wedding. And then when she learned from Maddie that she had been sent back home a day before the wedding because of her behavior, she obviously immediately decided that I was the bad guy here and I was the one turning my father against Maddie. Even on the day of my wedding, she called my dad about 100 times. but because he was busy, he didn't have the time to talk to her. However, for the past couple of days, ever since he's gone back home, she has really been getting

on his very last nerve. And he's been texting me almost every other day, telling me about what's going on. I actually feel really bad for him because all he tried to do was to do the right thing and tell. That did not sit too well with either Maddie or his wife. She has been insisting that I'm the one trying to break their family apart and that I should be apologizing to them right now and that my father really screwed up by sending Maddie home that day because she's very upset with him. And she has told her mom that she's not going to come back home until her father apologizes to her. And my dad's also a pretty tough nut to crack. He said he defended

Maddie against Jake, but that was the most that he could have done because in the situation that had come to exist, she was not right. He told his wife that he was putting his foot down and that if Maddie could not apologize to me for something she was definitely guilty of, trying to put me down at my own wedding and trying to be an attention seeker by constantly bringing up her little fling with Jake and then playing the victim when she got called out for it, that he was completely fine with her not visiting anymore because he was not going to support her if she was wrong. And since then, his wife has either been fighting with him or giving him the silent treatment, either of the two, hoping that he would crack. But he hasn't yet. The only thing that has happened is that he's extremely

annoyed with all of them. And I've told him that he can vent to me if he wants to because I'm pretty sure that he needs it. Otherwise, he'll end up driving himself crazy. Anyway, I just hope they're able to sort things out soon because otherwise this will just become another thing that mother and daughter will blame me for. Update 4. Okay, so it's been three weeks since my last update and a couple of days ago, my dad came over to live with us. He had already been going through a very tough patch with his family just because he had taken my side on something that was actually Maddie's fault. I had already spoken about how it was being created by his wife and Maddie in my last post and I honestly felt bad for how he was being treated in his own home. So I told him that if at any

point he felt like he needed to get away from all of this, Jake and I would be more than happy to have him over. We had discussed it with each other and we had a guest bedroom as well, so it wouldn't be much of a problem for us. Besides this week, we will get some more time to spend with each other. We will get some more time to spend with each other and speak about certain things that we hadn't had an opportunity to discuss before this because we were too caught up with the wedding. Now that that was done with, we could talk in a more relaxed way. And he finally decided to take us up on our offer a couple of days ago and has been staying with us since then. So, we made the most of it and we talked about everything in a way that we hadn't been able to sort things out before. It was mostly just me

and him talking. Jake was just there as an observer. Anyway, I won't get all the details of it and bore you guys. I'll just say that a lot of things were laid out and came out into the open and we discussed it. We talked about it at length. We were quite open with each other and things worked out fine. I think both of us are quite relieved at the end of it. Jake and I are going to leave for our honeymoon next week, but he's going to stay back and it's lucky because this way he gets some much-needed space away from his family.

It was probably driving him nuts right now and we don't have to worry about that. house either. So, it's a win-win for both of us. But by the time we came back, both of us agreed that it would be better for him to have gone back home and tried to sort things out with his wife and Maddie. And I really hope that they're able to do so because jokes aside, they've been together for a very long time and I wouldn't want this to end badly. Not just because it's my dad, but just in general as well. It would be pretty sad. Anyway, let's just see how things work out for him. and I'm going to keep my fingers crossed that it all works out for the best, and until then, Jake and I will be holidaying it up.

Update 5. Hi. So, a few days ago, Jake and I came back home. My dad was gone by then, and he had already informed us about it, so he had locked up and everything. After that, he and I didn't really get a chance to talk for a couple of days because I got busy with my work and he was also busy. But then today we got a call and he took. told me that he had decided to go for marriage counseling with his wife because clearly something

was going wrong since even though he had come back with the intention of fixing their marriage, they had ended up fighting even worse than the last time. In fact, even the days that he had been spending here trying to give her some space had backfired because she said that she felt ignored and unheard and things were just not very good. And I think that marriage counseling will actually do them a world of good. At least both of them were on the same page about this that they do want to make it work because they've been together for a very long time. And keeping all their personal differences aside, they still love each other and that they agree on. Personally, I think as long as they know they love each other, they will be able to

work it out. And for a while, the whole situation with Maddie, it's been put on the back burner for both of them, and they're just going to try and focus on their marriage and nothing else. I think that's the way it should be. And if Maddie knows what's good for her, she's going to encourage this. I'm just happy that they are going to try and fix their marriage because I want my dad to be happy. And I know that he wants the same for me. And I'm obviously happy. I just hope he is too. I hope you enjoy this story. Sibling covertly captured me discussing my emotional well-being to shame me at my celebration, so I revealed her risque internet images to all and now my guardians expelled her. Me out for embarrassing the family. Hi!

I'm Dixie, 18F, and I have an older sister named Bethany, 20F. Let me start by saying, Bethany is basically the definition of the golden child. She's got it all super pretty, super smart, was the president of the student council, and was even prom queen. She was always the star, the one everyone looked up to. Meanwhile, I'm more of the quiet, laid-back type. I do well in school, but I'm not really into all the extracurricular stuff. My parents love to compare us, which honestly gets tiring after a while.

They would always hype up Bethany and kind of brush off my achievements, no matter how hard I worked for them. It was like they could never see me as good enough. We have this weird situation with birthdays. You see, my birthday is only two days after Bethany's. So every year, they would throw this massive party for her, inviting all her friends, all the extended family, everyone. It was a big deal, like full-on decorations, cake, presents, the whole shebang. But when it came to my birthday, oh, they'd be like, we can't invite anyone over again so soon, and I'd end up with this small, almost forgotten celebration.

It wasn't that they didn't celebrate me, it just always felt like they didn't want me to take any attention away from Bethany during her week. It hurt, honestly. I always felt like I was standing in her shadow, and it was so obvious that I was. wasn't the one they were proud of. Bethany was always indifferent about it. Sometimes, she'd act like I didn't exist, but other times she could be a real bully. I don't think she realized how much it bothered me, but the constant comparison to her was really getting to me. I remember there were times when I'd ask for a little attention, and she'd just brush me off or make me feel dumb for it. It wasn't

the best, to say the least. But then, about a week before Bethany's birthday, something totally unexpected happened. She started showing interest in my life for once. Like actually asking me how I was doing, what was going on with me, and for the first time ever, she wasn't acting like the perfect sibling and I was some kind of background character. We stayed up all night talking, literally all night. I started opening up about some stuff that had been bothering me, like how anxious I had been feeling lately, especially with college coming up. I even mentioned I was thinking about seeing a therapist because well, things had just gotten overwhelming. I couldn't believe I was actually talking to her about it, but it felt good. It felt like I was finally being heard. For once, I didn't feel

like the invisible sister in the background. It was like, finally, we were connecting. So, naturally, when my birthday came around, I was pumped. I thought, hey, maybe this year will be different. Bethany actually insisted I should have a big birthday party, and to my surprise, my parents agreed. They were all in, and for the first time, I wasn't going to be left in the dust. I was ecstatic, you guys. I invited all my friends, I invited the family, basically everyone I could think of, and they all showed up. Bethany was even making this super cool video for me that she planned to show on a projector during the party. She said it was going to be a highlight of the night.

everything was going great, I thought. This was it. The birthday I had always dreamed of. But then, something totally unexpected happened. Aunt Ruby, 45F, pulled me aside during the party, and I thought she was just going to say something like, hey, happy birthday. But no, she had something else on her mind. She asked me if I needed help with something, and I was all confused, like, what do you mean? That's when she dropped the bombshell. Apparently, Bethany had shown her this video she made of me talking about my anxiety,

how I was planning to see a therapist, and just basically all these vulnerable moments I had shared with her. I was shocked. Like, seriously shocked. Not only did she record me without my permission, but now she was showing it to everyone? In front of Aunt Ruby? I was so mad I didn't even know what to do with myself. And then it got worse. Aunt Ruby goes on to tell me that Bethany had tons of other videos, too.

Videos where I talked about my crushes, some weird dates I had been on, and just random personal stuff I thought was private. And then the worst thought hit me, was she planning to show them all during the party? In front of the family? The thought of it made me want to scream. It felt like I was about to have my entire life exposed in front of everyone, and I couldn't do anything about it. My sister, the person I thought I could trust, was just throwing my privacy out the window.

Now, I'll be honest, at this point, I was beyond angry. I wanted to do something back, something to make her feel what I was feeling. So I decided to get a little petty. Bethany has this secret Instagram account, right? One that she uses for all her private stuff. She even has one specifically for her parents and family, but I never had access to it. But, like I said, I was mad, and I was going to make sure she knew how it felt. So, I did what any petty sibling would do, I stole her phone.

I know, I know, not the best idea, but honestly, I wasn't thinking straight at the time. Her password was super easy to guess, I mean, really? So I logged into her secret Instagram, and there it was, her entire hidden life, the one she thought no one knew about. I grabbed all the pictures from her account. Pictures of her partying, kissing guys, and one even where she was kissing a girl. I don't know why, but seeing that last one felt like an extra slap in the face. It's like she was this perfect, untouchable person in the family, and now I had something to hold over her head.

So, what did I do? I took those photos and showed them to everyone at the party through the projector. Yep. I did that. I'm not even going to lie, it felt kind of satisfying to watch her face turn bright red when people started seeing her secret life. Now, here we are. My parents are furious, Bethany is furious, and honestly, I'm not sure if I've crossed a line. I mean, yes, I'm petty, but it's not like I exposed anything that was truly harmful. It was just her own little secrets that she thought she could hide from everyone.

But now, the entire family knows everything. And yeah, I probably shouldn't have gone that far, but in the moment, it felt like a way to get back at her for betraying my trust. So, Reddit, did I go too far with this? Was I wrong for exposing her secrets like that, or was it a justified response to her betrayal? Honestly, I'm torn, but I don't think I can take back what happened. What do you think? Update 1, Hi, Everyone. It's been a week since I posted this story, and things have gotten so much worse.

I honestly thought things would settle down after the party, maybe some awkwardness, a few tense conversations, and then life would go back to normal. But nope. My parents went nuclear. Like full-on, no coming back from this level of mad. After the projector incident, my parents were furious. At both of us. You'd think they'd at least hear me out and understand why I didn't. what I did, but no. In their eyes, I committed some horrible crime by airing out family secrets.

The irony is, Bethany did the exact same thing to me, except worse, because she filmed me without my consent and was ready to publicly humiliate me in front of everyone. But somehow, that didn't matter. What mattered was that I had exposed the golden child, the perfect daughter, the one they could never find fault with. My mom was yelling about how ashamed she was of Bethany, which, okay, fine, I get that. I mean, some of those pictures were a lot, partying, kissing guys, kissing a girl, which, let's be real, wouldn't have been a problem if our family wasn't so traditional. But instead of focusing on how messed up it was that Bethany had violated my trust first, they turned on me. They said I was just as bad for doing something so vindictive,

for embarrassing the family in front of all our relatives. My dad kept saying things like, you had no right to do that, and this is not how we handle problems in this family. But like, what am I supposed to do when every time I try to handle things the right way, I get ignored? When I try to tell them how I feel, they brush me off. When I try to stand up for myself, I'm causing drama. And now, apparently, when I get even a tiny taste of justice, I'm ruining the family's reputation. And then they drop the bombshell, they're kicking me out. Yep. They actually said that. My dad straight up told me that I had one week to find a place to stay

because they can't have someone who disrespects family living under their roof. I was speechless. I honestly thought they were bluffing at first, just saying it in the heat of the moment. But no, they're dead serious. I tried to explain my side again, but they weren't having it. My mom just kept shaking her head, saying, you crossed a line, Dixie. You don't do that to your own sister. Like, oh, but it's totally fine for my own sister to do it to me. That's not crossing a line. Bethany, by the way, hasn't even tried to defend me.

Not that I expected her to, but part of me thought maybe she'd feel some guilt. But nah, she's just sulking, playing the victim, acting like I ruined her life. I overheard her telling my mom that she didn't even mean to hurt me and that the video she made was supposed to be funny and lighthearted, as if showing everyone my private thoughts, my anxieties, my embarrassing crushes, and personal struggles is something to laugh about. And what's worse? My parents believed her. My mom actually said, she wasn't trying to humiliate you, Dixie. She just made a mistake. Oh, so she makes a mistake, and she gets sympathy.

I retaliate and I get kicked out. Make it make sense. So now I have a week to figure out what to do. I was supposed to be taking a gap year before college. I'm still waiting on my college acceptance, so it's not like I can just pack up and move into a dorm. I do have a job, but it's not nearly enough to afford a place of my own, not even a tiny studio. I've got some money saved up, but again, nowhere near enough for rent, deposits, and, you know, just surviving. I'm freaking out, honestly. I've never lived on my own before, and I have no idea how I'm going to make this work. I guess I could try to crash with a friend, but I don't want to impose.

Most of my friends still live with their parents, and I doubt their families would be thrilled about taking in an extra person, especially one with family drama attached. I have some extended family, but considering they were all at the party and saw the whole thing go down, I doubt they'd be willing to take my side in this. Aunt Ruby might be an option, since she at least seemed concerned when she warned me about the video, but she's always been pretty hands-off with family conflicts, so I don't know if she'd want to get involved. I've been looking at cheap rooms for rent, but the prices are insane, and most of them require

deposits I just don't have. I could try finding a second job, but that would take it. take time, and I only have a week. I feel like I'm running out of options. And honestly, I'm heartbroken. Not even about leaving home, but about the fact that my parents were willing to throw me out so easily. Like, I always knew they favored Bethany, but I guess some part of me hoped they still loved me enough to not just abandon me like this. It hurts. A lot. So, Reddit, any advice? What would you do in my situation? I'm open to you. to anything at this point.

Update 2, hi everyone. I know it's been two months, but things have been chaotic. I thought I'd have a little time to process everything, but nope, my life has been one thing after another. So, after my parents kicked me out, I first asked Aunt Ruby if I could stay with her for a few months until I got my college results. She said no, claiming she didn't have the space. Which, fine, I get that.

But then I asked her. my grandparents, thinking for sure they'd say yes because, you know, they're my grandparents, and they basically told me the same thing. That one hurt. I always thought that, no matter what, family was supposed to have your back. Guess not. At that point, I was kind of panicking. I had a job and some savings, but definitely not enough to get my own place. I was seriously considering sleeping in my car or crashing on random couches. But then my amazing friend Brenda, 18F, stepped in. She asked her parents if I could stay with them for a while, and they actually agreed. I almost cried when she told me. It was the first time in weeks that I felt like someone

actually cared about what was happening to me. So, I moved in with Brenda's family, and honestly, they have been so kind to me. They don't make me feel like a burden, even though I don't definitely feel like one sometimes. I try to help out however I can, doing dishes, cooking meals, running errands, because the last thing I want is for them to regret taking me in. But then my parents decided that wasn't enough drama for them, so they started harassing Brenda's parents. Like, literally pulling them aside a church to tell them that they were ruining their plans by letting me stay. Apparently, they thought kicking me out would teach me a lesson, and Brenda's family was getting in the way of that. Like, what even if you were.

was the lesson supposed to be? That I should just accept being treated like garbage? That I should apologize for existing? Thankfully, Brenda's parents are actually decent people, and they shut that down real quick. They told my parents that kicking out their own daughter over some petty drama wasn't teaching a lesson, it was just cruel. And that meant so much to me. It was the first time in my life that I felt like someone was actually standing up for me. Meanwhile, Bethany got off with just a warning. Like, my parents said they'd cut her off if she didn't change her ways, but of course, they didn't actually do anything. She's still in her hostile, living her life, and probably feeling zero consequences for what she did. Typical golden child treatment. And I won't lie,

living with Brenda's family has been weird. Not because of them, they've been amazing, but because I feel this weird mix of gratitude and guilt. Like, I'm beyond thankful they took me in, but I also keep thinking, why did it have to come to this? Why did my own family throw me away so easily? It's hard not to let that mess with my head. I have also been receiving messages from Bethany, who keeps telling me that she's going to ruin my life, just like I ruined hers.

And honestly? At first, I thought she was just being dramatic. Like, yeah, I exposed her secret Instagram, but let's be real, she was not some innocent victim in all this. She literally recorded me without my consent and planned to humiliate me in front of our entire family and my friends. But according to her, I'm the villain. At first, I ignored her messages, but they just kept coming. Some of them were just petty, like, hope you enjoy being homeless, loser. Others were straight up unhinged. Like, I'll make sure you regret ever messing with me. I don't even know what she thinks she can do, but the constant harassment got to me.

I started feeling this pit of anxiety every time my phone buzzed, thinking it was another message from her. It got so bad that I actually started seeing a therapist. Admitting that I needed therapy felt huge for me. My family has always been the type that thinks therapy is for people who are weak or making excuses for their bad behavior. So even though I always knew I needed help, I never really considered it an option until now. but Brenda's parents were the ones who encouraged me and honestly. Therapy has been helping.

It's slow progress, but just having someone listened to me and validate my feelings has been kind of life-changing. But just as I was starting to get a little bit of control over my life, of course, something else had to go wrong. Last week, I got accepted into one of the colleges I applied to. It wasn't my absolute dream school, but it was better than my safety schools, so I was actually pretty excited about it. For the first time in months, I felt like things were maybe starting to turn around. The problem? My formal acceptance letter and financial aid package were mailed to my home

address, which means I had to go back to my parents' house to get it. I knew it was going to be awkward, but I figured, okay, maybe they'll just let me grab my stuff and leave. Like, at the very least, they could pretend to be civil for five minutes, right? I showed up at the house and not. I showed up at the house and knocked. No answer. Rang the doorbell. Nothing. I tried calling my mom's phone and it was straight to voicemail. So I knocked again and again and again. I must have been standing outside the door for a full hour, just waiting. At one point, I even saw movement through the window, so I knew she was in there. She was just straight up refusing to open the door for me. Like, how petty can you be. You kick your own daughter out, and then when she comes back for literal college

documents, you just ignore her? I was getting more and more frustrated, but I didn't want to start yelling outside like a crazy person, so I left. Now, I have no idea what to do. My financial aid package is in that letter, and I need it. The college said they send it through regular mail, so there's no tracking number or anything. I already called them, and they said they could send another one, but it would take a couple of weeks, and I don't know if I have that kind of time. I also don't know if my mom actually threw the letter away or if she's just holding onto it to be spiteful. Does anyone know what I can do? Like, legally, do I have any rights here?

Or am I just screwed? Update 3, wow, I honestly didn't think I'd get to this point, but here we are. I'm officially done with them. Like, for real this time. So yeah, I ended up waiting for the second package because there really wasn't much else I could do. But, of course, nothing in my life is ever simple. Turns out, I still needed a bunch of stuff from my parents for financial aid, things like tax documents, signatures, proof of income.

You know, all the stuff that normal parents would just give their kid without turning it into a full-blown war. But, as we've established, my parents aren't normal. At first, I tried asking them nicely through text. No response. I called, straight to voicemail. Brenda even suggested that I try having one of my aunts talk to them on my behalf. But yeah, no.

Aunt Ruby barely wanted to help me when I needed a place to stay, and the rest of my family was either indifferent or actively avoiding me. So, I had to get creative. And that's when I realized. I knew exactly where my parents would be that Sunday. Church. Now, before you guys think I went in there and caused some dramatic, soap opera-style scene, I didn't. I just waited for the service to end, walked right up to them in front of the pastor, and started talking.

Loudly. I was polite. I was respectful. But I made sure everyone within earshot could hear me. Hey, Mom. Hey, Dad. I really need those documents for my financial aid. Can we talk about that now?

And oh my God, you guys, the looks on their faces. My mom looked like she just swallowed a lemon, and my dad went bright red. I could see the gears turning in their heads, like, do we make a scene in church, or do we play along? They reluctantly agreed. But the second we stepped outside, my mom grabbed my arm, pulled me aside, and hissed at me. Like, actually hissed in that low, angry mom voice. What kind of game are you playing?

And I just, snapped. I was done playing nice. I looked her dead in the eyes and said, If you try to screw with my college admissions, I will make sure everyone in this church knows exactly what kind of parents you are. I'll make sure you're so embarrassed that you won't be able to show your face here ever again. And just like that, I had them. It was kind of funny, actually.

My whole life, they've used shame and public image as a weapon against me. They've ignored me, belittled me, made me feel like I was less than just because I wasn't Bethany. But the second I flipped the script and used their own game against them? Oh, suddenly they wanted to cooperate. Long story short, they handed over every single document I needed. I got their signatures. I double-checked everything before walking away. And the best part?

That was it. I don't ever have to deal with them again. No more begging for scraps of attention, no more fighting for what should have been basic parental support, no more feeling like an afterthought. I have everything I need to move forward. I won't lie, it still hurts. There's a part of me that wishes they had just been better. That they had loved me the way they loved Bethany. But at the end of the day, I can't change them, and honestly? I don't even want to anymore. I'm free now. And I'm never looking back. Update 4. Wow. I really thought I was done with all of this. I thought I had finally gotten everything sorted and could just move on. But nope, my mom had to pull one last stunt before I left. So, yeah, I'm leaving for college tomorrow.

It still doesn't feel real, but I'm excited and terrified at the same time. I was trying to be responsible, making a list of everything I needed to pack, and I realized there were still a lot of my things back at the house. Stuff like clothes, blankets, and a few personal things that actually mattered to me. You know, normal things that any reasonable person would assume they'd be able to take. I sent my mom a text, just to be polite. I wasn't even asking. I just told her, hey, I'll be coming by to grab the rest of my stuff. She left me on scene. didn't even bother responding. I should have known right then that she was about to pull some crap. Anyway, I went over the next day. The front door was unlocked, so I just walked in. I figured,

hey, it's still technically my home too, right? I used to live there. My room was still my room. My stuff was still my stuff. Or so I thought. I started packing, just minding my own business, when my mom suddenly barged in. No knock, no warning, just straight up stormed into the room like she was catching me robbing the place. What do you think you're doing? She asked, all dramatic. I just blinked at her, holding a half-folded hoodie in my hands. Um, packing?

She crossed her arms and gave me that look, you know, the mom look. The one that means she's about to ruin your whole day. That's not your stuff, she said. I actually laughed because I thought she was joking. Like, what? I literally bought some of these things with my own money. My clothes, my books, my freaking bed sheets, what was she even talking about? But no.

She was dead serious. She said that because she and my dad had technically bought most of these things over the years, they belonged to her. And since I had decided to disrespect this family, I wasn't entitled to take anything with me. I was standing there, staring at her, trying to process what kind of insanity I was dealing with, and she just, took my suitcase. She physically took it from me and told me to get out. I honestly don't even remember what I said after that. I think I just stood there for a solid minute, too stunned to speak, before I grabbed my phone and walked out. There was no point in

arguing. I wasn't going to win. She wanted a reaction from me, and I wasn't going to give her satisfaction. But man, that hurt. I had already come to terms with the fact that my parents didn't really care about me. But this? This was something else. This was spite. This was just a final, petty little way for my mom to make sure I knew that I wasn't welcome anymore. So yeah, I left with nothing. I don't even remember venting about it that much, but I must have mentioned it to Brenda, because the next day, her parents took me out shopping. And I don't mean, like, a small shopping trip. I mean, they spoiled me.

New clothes, toiletries, towels, bedding, literally everything my mom had refused to let me take. They even got me a few dishes and a cute little lamp for my dorm. I cried. I never cry in front of people, but I just lost it in the middle of the store. These weren't even my parents, and yet, in that moment, they had done more for me than my actual family ever had. Honestly, the last few days have been a blur. Between packing, last minute shopping and trying not to completely break down, I haven't had

much time to process everything. But now that I'm sitting here, thinking about it all, I realize something. I don't feel as angry as I thought I would. I mean, don't get me wrong, I'm mad. I'm mad that my parents could be so cruel, that they made it clear I was never really wanted, but at the same time, there's this weird sense of relief. Like, I don't have to keep hoping for their approval anymore. I don't have to spend every holiday pretending that I don't see the way they favor Bethany.

I don't have to deal with my mom's passive aggressive comments or my dad's indifference. I'm free. And maybe that's the best thing that could have happened to me. Brenda's family has been incredible. They even threw me a little going away dinner last night, just to celebrate this new chapter in my life. Brenda's dad told me that their home is always open to me, no matter what happens. And that meant more than I can even put into words. I also want to say thank you to everyone who has been listening and helping me through this.

I hope you enjoy this story. Sibling selected my daughter with limited mobility as the flower girl for his wedding that did not allow children, but his recent spouse took me aside afterward and insisted that I covered the cost of editing the photos. Remove my daughter's wheelchair from all the wedding pictures. Just two weeks ago, my younger brother David married the love of his life, Amelia, in what was a beautiful, heartwarming ceremony. David had been looking forward to this day for a long time, and everyone who knew him could see just how deeply he loved Amelia. Originally, their wedding was planned to be a completely child-free event, and this was clearly stated in their invitation cards. However, a couple of weeks before the wedding, I received a phone

call from David. To my surprise, he told me that he wanted to make an exception for his niece, my daughter Katie. I asked him if he was sure. David told me how much he loves Katie and how he couldn't go through with the wedding without having her as their flower girl. I was almost in tears hearing him say that. Katie absolutely adores her uncle David, and they have always had a special bond. David assured me he had talked with his bride and she had no issues with it either. I could hear the sincerity in his voice, he didn't want Katie to miss such an important day in his life, and he knew how much it would mean to her. For some context, my daughter Katie was born with partial paralysis. She can't move her body below her arms, which has obviously been a life-altering reality for us as parents.

When my husband Roger and I first found out, it was truly devastating. It felt, like the ground had been pulled out from under us. We were in complete shock, refusing to accept the diagnosis. We went from doctor to doctor, for in total, desperately seeking a different opinion, hoping that maybe someone, somewhere, had a solution. We did every test imaginable, and with each one we prayed for good news. We wanted to believe that there might be a surgery or a treatment out there that could change things for Katie and could give her the life she deserved. But no matter where we went or what we did, the answer was always the same, there was nothing that could be done. Coming to terms with the fact that our daughter's condition was permanent

was very, very hard. It was a dark time for us, filled with sleepless nights, tears, and questions that had no answers. We felt completely helpless. Looking at our precious daughter, our hearts broke every time we thought about what Katie's future might look like. That feeling of helplessness was overwhelming. But over time, slowly and gradually, we began to find and connect with other families who were on the same journey as us, and we felt a bit reassured. Instead of thinking about what Katie couldn't do, we started focusing on what she could do and on giving her as much love and support as humanly possible. One of the people who has been a constant source of joy and light for Katie is her Uncle David. He never once treated her differently because of her

condition. In fact, he has a way of making my daughter feel so comfortable, so completely at ease, that when they're together, it's like her condition doesn't even exist. This is something I've always appreciated, especially because other family members sometimes, even unintentionally, can make things awkward or uncomfortable. For example, my own mother, when she first saw Katie after she was born and realized the extent of her paralysis, was visibly shaken. I understood it was a difficult thing for her to process, but her reaction caught me off guard. Instead of offering comfort or support, she pulled me aside and, in a hushed voice, suggested that I should try to have another baby, one who could walk. My eyes widened in shock upon hearing her words. My mother continued to

urge me that maybe if I tried again, would have a better baby. It was as if Katie wasn't enough or didn't count because of her condition. I was stunned. It was such a heartless thing to say. But David stood up for me immediately, scolding our mother for being so harsh and insensitive. He told her that Katie was perfect the way she was and that she didn't need to be replaced or compared to anybody else. I'll never forget the fierceness in his voice when he defended my child. He scolded our mother for pushing me to get pregnant while I was still in the process of grieving and coming to terms with Katie's condition. Ever since then, I have not allowed my mother to spend any alone time with Katie and have reduced my contact with her as much of as possible. Meanwhile, David would come over every weekend, rain or shine, just to spend time with

my daughter. They'd spend hours goofing around, watching silly shows, or playing games. It was during those weekends that I would see Katie light up in a way that was so pure and joyful, she could just be a kid having fun with her favorite person in the world. Their bond has been a blessing for her and for us as well. So when he called me about making an exception for my daughter to attend his wedding, I would was deeply touched. I knew that allowing Katie to be there would mean everything to her, and it would also be a beautiful way for David to honor their connection on his special day. So I agreed to bring Katie and was excited for her to be a flower girl. However, as much as David was eager to have Katie at the wedding, I don't think his bride Amelia was quite as enthusiastic about the idea. A few days

after David called me with the invitation for Katie, Amelia reached out to me directly. She informed me that she had certain conditions for allowing Katie to attend their wedding. The conditions were oddly specific and rubbed me the wrong way. First, she insisted that Katie wear a beige dress, one that was flowy and, in her words, appropriate for the wedding atmosphere. Amelia also mentioned that Katie's hair needed to be done in a way that didn't look unkempt or ruined the aesthetic of her wedding. I was taken aback by how controlling her requests were.

However, I chose to bite my tongue. After all, it was her wedding, and we needed to abide by her wishes. I didn't want to stir up any tension or make things uncomfortable for David, so I nodded along and assured her that I would comply with her wishes. After all, what mattered most to me was that Katie could be there for her uncle. I immediately went out and bought a beautiful beige dress for Katie. It was simple but elegant, just the way Amelia wanted, and I knew it would make my daughter feel special. I took a photo of the dress and sent it to Amelia since she had wanted me to send a

picture of the dress after my purchase. I hoped she would be satisfied, but to my surprise, she wasn't. Amelia replied back quickly, saying that the dress was too beige and looked lifeless. She said that she preferred something with a little more color. I felt confused and frustrated, wasn't this exactly what she had asked for? Still, I didn't want to argue or push back. I was doing everything I could to keep the piece. So instead of just buying another dress on my own and wasting my money, this time I decided to send her a few options before making a purchase. I didn't want to buy something that she would inevitably reject again. Amelia finally picked one of the dresses I had sent over, and I couldn't believe my eyes when I saw her choice.

The beige color of the dress she selected was practically identical to the dress I had already bought, the one she had criticized for being too beige. The only difference was the tiniest hint of a pinkish tint that was barely noticeable. At that moment, it started to dawn on me that this wasn't about the dress or the color at all. Amelia was deliberately making things difficult. It felt like she was testing me or setting up obstacles to make me jump through hoops. There could be a reason she didn't want my daughter at the wedding. However, she had not told me directly anything, and I didn't want to unnecessarily stir things up with her. If she wanted to un-invite my daughter, she needed to talk to my brother and have it sorted out.

However, she never did, and the wedding happened as planned. On the day of my brother's wedding, Katie looked absolutely stunning as she made her way down the aisle and her beautiful beige dress, the one that Amelia had finally approved. The dress flowed gracefully as she wheeled herself forward, her face glowing with happiness. As she stopped to toss flower petals, the entire room seemed to pause. There was an audible gasp from the guests, followed by a chorus of compliments. People couldn't stop talking about how beautiful she looked, and I could see the joy radiating from her as she continued down the aisle, scattering flowers, and resuming her steady progress in her wheelchair.

I felt an overwhelming sense of pride and love for my daughter at that moment. Seeing her there, fully participating in such a special occasion, was a memory I'll treasure forever. Tears of joy welled up in my eyes, and I glanced over. at David, whose expression mirrored my emotions. He looked at Katie with so much pride, his smile wide and warm, clearly touched by her presence and her radiant spirit. As she reached the front, David walked over to her, kneeling down to give her a heartfelt hug. It was such a tender moment between them, one that spoke volumes about their close bond. Then he helped her

position herself to the side, making sure she was comfortable and could be part of the ceremony me from the front row. A few moments later, Amelia began her walk down the aisle, and there's no denying that she looked breathtaking in her wedding gown. As she approached the altar, I couldn't help but notice how her gaze briefly landed on Katie. For a split second, I hope to see her smile at my daughter, some acknowledgement of her presence and the role she played on this important day. But instead, Amelia visibly rolled her eyes and looked past Katie without even a hint of a smile. I couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment. Still, I chose to push the thought aside, not wanting anything to overshadow the joy of the day.

David and Amelia took their vows, and when the officiant declared them husband and wife, I felt a rush of happiness for my brother. He had finally found someone to share his life with, and in that moment, nothing else mattered. Seeing him so happy made my heart swell with pride and joy. After the ceremony, during the photo sessions, we gathered together as a family for pictures. David made sure that Katie was included in every shot. We took so many pictures, capturing the love and unity that we all felt that day. During the photo session, I couldn't help but notice that Amelia seemed a bit off. She kept sighing heavily and huffing under her breath, which I initially

brushed off as her being tired. After all, weddings are exhausting, and maybe she just needed a break from taking so many photos. But as the session continued, her behavior became harder to ignore. At one point, when David picked Katie up and held her in his arms for a picture, Amelia's expression noticeably shifted. She looked disappointed, her smile faltering as her eyes focused on them. It was subtle but clear enough to make me uncomfortable. After we had taken several pictures with Katie, Amelia came up to me with a polite but clipped tone and asked if I could will Katie out so that she could take some photos with just her family. The request caught me off guard, but I agreed. I took Katie to sit with my parents at the reception.

My mother did acknowledge how beautiful my daughter looked and told me that I was lucky to have a daughter like her. It was a small gesture, but I was happy my mother was moving past her biases and learning to accept my daughter for who she is. Overall, Katie, blissfully unaware of any seemed to have had a good day, and that's what mattered the most to me. After the wedding, Amelia and David left for their honeymoon, and from the pictures and stories David posted on his social media, it seemed like they were having an amazing time. I was happy for him. He deserved to enjoy this special time with his new wife. Once they returned from their honeymoon, David invited our family, me, Roger, and our parents, over to his new home for lunch. It was meant to be a casual

family gathering, and I was looking forward to seeing him again, especially since we hadn't really spoken much after the wedding. Since the wedding, my mom and I have reconnected in a way I didn't expect. She had taken the time to properly apologize to me for what she had said about Katie years ago and about pushing me to try for another baby. She was genuinely remorseful, and while part of me was still cautious, I appreciated the fact that she had recognized the pain her words had caused. During lunch, David was absolutely over the moon to see Katie again. The moment we arrived at his house, he excitedly pulled out a collection of gifts he had brought back for her from their honeymoon. He had clearly put a lot of thought into each one, and Katie's face lit up with pure joy as she unwrapped them.

She was smiling from ear to ear, and David, as always, was completely engaged with her, asking about her favorite part of the wedding and telling her how much everyone had been talking about how beautifully she had performed her work. role. He told her over and over again how proud he was, mentioning how friends and family had called him after the wedding to compliment Katie on what a wonderful job she had done. Hearing all these compliments made Katie beam with pride, her eyes twinkling with happiness. However, while my brother was showering Katie with attention, I couldn't help but notice Amelia. I observed her closely, and it became glaringly obvious that she wasn't sharing in David's enthusiasm. She didn't smile or even acknowledge Katie. Instead, she looked visibly annoyed, as if David's interaction with Katie was somehow an inconvenience to her.

Her expression carried a mix of exasperation and impatience, and she barely engaged with anyone while David focused on Katie. It was like she was waiting for the moment to pass, eager for his attention to shift away from my daughter. David, of course, was completely oblivious to his wife's attitude. After lunch, we all sat around the living room, relaxing and chatting as a family. It was then that Amelia came over to me and quietly asked if we could talk privately. I felt a knot form in my stomach because I already had a sense of what was coming. I had been bracing myself for this conversation ever since the wedding day. With a nod, I agreed, preparing myself for what I knew would be a difficult discussion.

Amelia led me to one of the bedrooms, and we sat down to talk. She started by first complimenting me for doing a wonderful job with Katie by following all her conditions, and keeping my word regarding Katie's appearance at the wedding. I nodded and thanked her, telling her that I wanted to be respectful because it was her big day. She paused and then added that while she appreciated my effort, there was something bothering her ever since the wedding. My heart sank. Amelia took out her phone and pulled up the wedding photos, scrolling through the ones the photographer had taken. I saw images of all of us smiling, enjoying the moment together as a family, David, Amelia,

Katie, me, and the rest of the relatives. She stopped on one particular picture and pointed at it, and her tone grew cold. Look at this, she said, zooming in on the image. It was one of the family photos with Katie in her wheelchair beside David, all of us smiling and looking happy. Amelia's finger hovered over Katie, and she looked at me with a scornful expression. Do you see how your stupid kid in a wheelchair is ruining the vibe of the entire picture? She said, the word words coming out sharp and venomous. For a moment, I couldn't breathe. I was in complete shock.

How could she say something so cruel, so heartless about my daughter? I felt an immediate rush of anger. The very suggestion that my sweet girl, who had tried her best to be part of the celebration, was now being blamed for ruining the vibe. I argued back, telling Amelia she had no right to speak about Katie that way and reminded her that she knew from the start that Katie was in a wheelchair. There was no other way for my daughter to pose for photos, how else could she have possibly participated?

Amelia, unfazed by my reasoning, scoffed and said, that's not my problem, and went on to say that seeing Katie's wheelchair in every photo was an eyesore that had ruined her vision for the wedding pictures. As if that wasn't enough, she then suggested that I should offer compensation for letting my daughter ruin her wedding. I was appalled by her audacity. I raised my voice, asking her what kind of compensation she was even talking about, completely shocked that she would make such a ridiculous demand. That's when Amelia hit me with her real demand. She said that I needed to pay for a photo editor to Photoshop Katie either out of the wedding pictures or, at the very least, make her appear without the wheelchair. I gasped in disbelief. How could she possibly think it was acceptable to

erase my daughter from the wedding photos or to alter who she was just for the sake of aesthetics? This was the breaking point. I couldn't hold back any longer. Are you serious? I shouted, my words filled with disbelief. You want me to pay someone to erase my daughter or pretend she isn't in a wheelchair? You're an ablest, Amelia. I'm proud of my daughter exactly the way she is, and I will not be paying for any kind of Photoshop.

If you had such a problem with her being part of the wedding, then you should have never let her be the flower girl in the first place. Amelia argued back, saying she had tried her best to dissuade David from letting Katie be their flower girl, but that his love for Katie was so blind that he did not agree. She told me how she knew that if she had insisted on uninviting my daughter, he would have broken off the wedding. I shook my head as I realized this woman had been harboring such resentment towards Katie. Her reasoning was so callous, so heartless, that it made me feel disgusted. I reminded her sharply that my daughter was a living, breathing human human, being with real emotions and did not deserve to be hated this way. She loved her uncle and had been

genuinely overjoyed to be part of their wedding. She didn't deserve this kind of treatment, especially not from Amelia, now that she was my sister-in-law. But Amelia didn't seem to care. She argued back, saying that both Katie and I were just attention seekers and that I shouldn't forget that the only reason people had paid so much attention to Katie at the wedding was because of her disability. Her words were so vile that something inside me snapped. The rage that had been building finally boiled over, and before I even realized what I was doing, I slapped Amelia. The sound of my hand connecting with her face echoed in the stillness of the room, and I stood there, my hand trembling, my chest heaving with the weight of everything that had just happened.

Amelia's face flushed red with shock, and I could see her eyes widened in disbelief. Before she could react, my brother barged into the room along with my husband and my parents. My brother asked Amelia if she really meant what she had said about Katie. Amelia's eyes widened in realization. It turns out that David had been listening to our entire conversation and had likely heard every single word of her cruel and manipulative remarks. Panic flashed across her face, and she tried to backtrack, stumbling over her words in a desperate attempt to explain herself, but it was too late. David's voice filled the room as he bellowed at her and called her shameless and manipulative for bringing me aside to talk about my daughter this way.

I can't believe you manipulated me into thinking you were a nice person when in reality you hate my family this much, he shouted, his voice filled with both pain and anger. The disappointment in his tone was palpable, and it was clear that he was seeing Amelia for who she really was, someone who had hidden her true feelings all along. Amelia, desperate to salvage the situation, tried to argue back. I don't hate your family exactly, this is just about Katie, she said, her voice trembling. She then tried to spin the situation around, accusing David of always favoring Katie over everyone just because she was disabled and he felt sorry for her. She claimed that as his wife, she deserved more of his attention and that he needed to stop prioritizing Katie so much and focus on their marriage instead. Then Amelia began to complain about how inviting Katie had led to some of her

friends mocking her wedding pictures later, leaving her feeling humiliated. She claimed that this was the reason she had wanted to Photoshop Katie out of the photos, so that she could always remember their beautiful day without such ugliness. Thankfully, David wasn't having it. He told her to get off her high horse and stop acting like his niece could have somehow spoiled their pictures, and that her being in the pictures made them even more beautiful. I love Katie like my own daughter. Giving attention to her doesn't take away anything from you. The fact that I even have to explain this goes to show how cheap your mentality is. Katie is part of my family, and if you hate her this much, then I can't be married to you. Amelia's face went pale as David's words hit her. He looked at her with a clarity

that showed he wasn't willing to let this slide. You're an ablest, just like my sister said, he added, echoing the very accusation I had made earlier. The fact that you continue to justify your behavior means that you will never change. I do not want to be married to a cruel woman like you. Pack up your things and go back to your parents' place. Amelia, still in shock, tried to argue once more, but my mother, who had been quiet up until now, finally stepped in, visibly livid. She expressed her anger about the situation, emphasizing that while it was one thing to dislike the attention Katie received at the wedding, considering photoshopping her out of the pictures was heartless. My mother firmly stated her support for David's decision and told Amelia that she should be ashamed of herself for even suggesting such a thing.

Hearing my mother's defense and seeing David's unwavering stance, Amelia knew she had no more ground to stand on. My husband looked furious, and I am sure if Amelia was not my brother's wife at the time, he would have confronted her right then and therefore speaking such vile things about our daughter. Amelia was outnumbered and her true colors had been laid bare for everyone to see. Reluctantly, with no other choice, she walked out of the house with just her phone and car keys. Later, David apologized to me and Roger for what his wife had said about our daughter, but I appreciated him for standing up for Katie. This was in no way his fault. That evening, Amelia's parents called David and my parents, wanting to discuss the situation further, likely after Amelia had gone to them in tears. However, David has requested some time off so he can cool down and think about things. Since the incident, Amelia has been sending me several messages where she's basically blaming me for causing issues between her and David.

She thinks I could have simply solved their issues by agreeing to pay for a photo editor. Now, of course, I don't want my brother's marriage to break down because of me, but at the same time, what Amelia has said to me about my daughter is unforgivable. Am I the asshole for Amelia being kicked out of the house? Update 1. I am receiving so many comments and DMs that I'm unable to reply to everyone, so I will clarify all the points here. Amelia had met Katie before and knew about her relationship with my brother, yet it seemed she had managed to conceal her disdain for my daughter all this time. Not even once had I ever suspected that she actually hated my daughter this much. I understand that some people might feel uncomfortable seeing a child in a wheelchair, especially at a wedding, but we do our best to make Katie feel as normal as possible.

so she doesn't feel like she's being treated differently just because of her disability. Katie is a beautiful person, and regardless of her being in a wheelchair, I'm confident that people would still compliment her. She has blue eyes and her dad's blonde hair. It's clear that Amelia was simply trying to find faults in my daughter out of her own jealousy. My brother is the godfather of Katie, and this is because I'm confident that if anything happens to me and my husband, he will be there for my daughter. He loves Katie like his own daughter. which is why he's so fiercely protective of her. Hearing Amelia's words and seeing her true intentions about my daughter must have felt like a complete betrayal to him.

I don't think Katie heard anything that Amelia and I spoke about, as she was busy watching her cartoons. If she had, she would have definitely asked me some questions later. Update 2. For anyone asking, my brother is getting his wedding annulled. My brother and his lawyer strongly believed that Amelia misrepresented herself from the start and manipulated him into thinking she would be okay with his family when in truth she wasn't. When Amelia discovered that David was genuinely serious about leaving her, she panicked and made a desperate attempt to save her marriage. In a half-hearted effort, she reached out to me to offer

an apology, but it was pretty clear to me her words were insincere. She wasn't genuinely remorseful or ready to take responsibility for her actions. I simply couldn't accept her apology, knowing it was just a ploy to shift the blame away from herself. This only fueled her anger. In frustration, she immediately turned on me, accusing me of ruining my brother's life. It was as if I was the source of all her problems rather than the consequences of her own choices. She told me how I was at fault for forcing my brother to leave her when he could have been so happy with her instead. As if this wasn't enough, Amelia's parents also reached out to my parents, attempting to shift the blame onto me and Katie for what their daughter is experiencing. thankfully, my parents have pushed back against this unfair accusation.

My dad, in particular, expressed his disappointment, telling them they should be ashamed of the daughter they raised and that he is relieved she will no longer be part of our family. I'm so proud that my family has stood up for me and Katie throughout all this. I did speak to my brother and express my apologies for what he was going through with Amelia. He reassured me that it was better for him to learn the truth about her now rather than later, when she could have potentially done or said something more damaging in front of Katie. I completely agree and feel a sense of relief knowing that we are effectively getting rid of Amelia from our lives too.

Update 3. It's been four months since my last update, and for everyone asking, my brother has officially annulled his marriage and is no longer married to Amelia. After the truth about their marriage falling apart became public, Amelia faced a lot of backlash from everyone. She eventually reached out to me to apologize, but I I simply blocked her without responding. Recently, all of us went on a vacation together. It was a wonderful time for all of us. David and Katie continued to have an amazing relationship,

which brings me a lot of joy. The whole experience has only strengthened our family bonds, and I'm grateful for that. I hope you enjoy this story. Sibling skipped my wedding to covertly tie the knot with my husband's relative whom she had just met a fortnight ago, then pleaded with me to assist in legal action against him upon realizing he was deceitful. Dr. G. Addict

So for context, I got married last week and on the day of my wedding, instead of being there for me and fulfilling her duties as made of honor, my sister was getting married as well. My younger sister, Michelle, 24F, and I, 27F, had a very weird hot and cold relationship where if we are getting along, it's great, but if we are fighting, we are going to take it to extremes. This is how it's always been with us, but deep down, we have always had love for each other and I guess that's why we were still able to be in each other's lives in spite of our frequent disagreements. It was kind of toxic, now that I think about it, but it is what it is and even after we moved out of our parents' home, we made an active effort to stay involved in each other's lives, even though sometimes we got on each other's nerves. The main reason behind our fight, in my opinion, was the fact that we were really very different as people. She was a bit of a wild child, always had been, and I had always been the polar opposite since I was quite type A about everything and like to plan ahead and stay responsible, which are not things that she is very good at. But in spite of our differences, I decided to ask her to be my maid of honor when my parents suggested that idea to me, since that would strengthen our bond and I agreed with that, after some convincing on their part. I have been with my husband for the past four years and earlier this year, we got engaged.

I didn't really have any intention of having a lot of bridesmaids and a maid of honor and I kind of wanted to do away with the idea altogether because if I'm being honest, I don't really have a lot of close friends. It's a personal choice and also I'm not really good at keeping in touch. So it's not like I don't have any friends at all. It's just that the ones that I do have are not close enough to be my bridesmaids or whatever. That is why initially, I did not plan on having bridesmaids at all and my husband also agreed with that because we wanted a small, intimate. and simple wedding. But when my parents suggested the idea of making my sister to be my maid of honor, I got around to liking that idea after they started convincing me that it would be really nice and eventually, they wore me down. And when I asked her, she agreed immediately and I didn't really have any bridesmaids, but I figured that Michelle would be enough for me. The past couple of months of wedding prep and everything had been really fun and I had been getting along well with Michelle too, so I really never would have imagined her pulling off what she did on the day of my

wedding. On my big day, she decided to thank me for making her the maid of honor by ghosting me and showing up in the evening, after everything was over, with her new husband. And her so-called new husband had turned out to be my husband's creepy cousin who has been divorced twice, Josh, 36M. I'm not just calling him creepy because he had apparently been hitting on Michelle throughout the days leading up to the wedding and it was kind of gross because she was a whopping 12 years younger than him and it hasn't even been a month since his divorce was finalized. I'm a very much. I'm I'm calling him creepy because he has a history of making women uncomfortable, according to what my husband has told me. Just for the record, he had not been invited to the wedding because my husband does not get along with him and neither does anybody in the family really like him, except for his parents.

But we had made the mistake of inviting his parents and two weeks before my wedding, we had hosted an informal brunch for just our families. For some reason, Josh's parents, my father-in-law's older brother, and his wife had decided to bring him along. That's how he and Michelle had met for the first time because we had to stay, even though we hadn't specifically invited him and had just invited his parents, we did not want to ruin the vibe of the afternoon by picking a fight with anyone and as long as he was not creeping anyone out, we were not going to kick him out. Even that day, I had noticed that Michelle was sitting beside Josh the entire time, and there was a bit of flirtation going on there.

I was not fine with it because I knew what kind of a person Josh was and I did not feel good about him getting close to my sister, but I just figured. that it was a one-day thing, so I did not say anything about it. I did not bring it up with her later on either because I was too busy and also because I did not think it was worth it, since like I said, I did not figure that it would turn into anything serious. And I did not think that she would see him again because, after the brunch, my father-in-law had spoken to his brother and had told him that while we had not said anything about them bringing

Josh to brunch, they would expect him not to attend the wedding since he had not been invited and my husband and I only wanted our close friends and family members to be there. Since Josh wasn't particularly close to my husband, they would expect him not to show up and from what I know. His parents were not happy about it, but they agreed to respect our wishes. Honestly, after the brunch, we didn't even want them at the wedding, but we did not want to create any drama so we didn't say anything afterward. What nobody knew was that Michelle and Josh had exchanged numbers and they had been texting each other every day, ever since they had met each other at brunch. She hadn't told me about it because I was too busy with my wedding prep and stuff and I had

asked because I didn't really think anything was going on. If she had brought it up with me at any point, I definitely would have told her that Josh was not the right kind of guy for her and would have wanted her to know about him. So I really don't see how it's my fault that she got carried away while talking to him and he convinced her to ditch my wedding so they could get married. Five days before my wedding, Josh had applied for a marriage license and then, he started to talk her into it, and by the night before my wedding, she had been fully convinced. He thought that he was making the day iconic by getting both sisters married on the same day and my sister was stupid enough to fall for that rubbish. Anyway, on the night before my wedding, Michelle literally took off in the middle of the night so she could go to Josh and nobody even knew about it until we checked with the hotel authorities, and they confirmed that she had checked out the previous night. Before that, I had been worried sick because we couldn't find her on the morning of the wedding

and her room was empty and neither was she responding to any of our texts or phone calls. However, after speaking to the staff and confirming that she had left, I decided to go ahead with my wedding because it was clear that I was being ghosted and I was obviously not her first priority that day. She had completely disregarded the relationship that we had had and I decided to go through with the wedding without her. I was kind of upset about it, but, thankfully, husband and my parents cheered me up and by the time everything was done, I had almost forgotten about Michelle. When she finally returned in the evening with Josh and explained everything, I totally lost it at her and I told her that I wanted nothing to do with her anymore because

due to her irresponsible behavior, my wedding had almost been ruined, and she even had the audacity to act like I was overreacting because apparently, she had expected me to be happy that she had found the love of her life and was married now. If I'm being honest, the only people who were happy about that marriage were Michelle, Josh, and Josh's parents. It was bad enough that they had gone through with the wedding on the same day as me and ghosted me. It was worse than Michelle and Josh, and even his parents expected us to be happy for them. We got into a really bad verbal fight that evening, after which all of them left the wedding angrily and we hadn't been in touch with them since, and I was more than fine with that if I'm being honest. Anyway, now it has been a week since both of us

had been married and while it has been a great week for me and my husband, I can't say the same for Michelle because last night, she showed up at my house with her because she was miserable with Joshua apparently, he was not the guy that she had thought he was going to be in the past week had been bad enough for her to realize it. While he had been very charming for the past two weeks, when he was trying to get her to marry him, he hadn't told her anything about his past. She had no idea that he had been married twice before already and she didn't even know that he was 12 years older than him, he had significantly reduced his age while speaking to her and she thought that he was in his early 30s. It also helped that Josh is kind of blessed with good looks, even though I can't deny that, so she believed him.

But a couple of days after their marriage, he started to tell her everything and she also started to find out that he had been bluffing about how rich he was. He had invited her over to meet him a couple of times while they were talking and she thought that he was really well because he had been inviting her over to one of his friends' houses to meet her, just so he could impress her. But after they got married, she had moved into his apartment, which was just really tiny and not even in a good neighborhood. And the worst part of all of this was that she had found out that he was high the entire time. I'm not even joking, he had been high when he started flirting with her at brunch. He had been high when he applied for a marriage license. He had been high when he asked her to marry him and started convincing her to skip the wedding and even while they were getting married, he had been higher than a skyscraper.

She had found out about all of this recently, after the wedding, and even then she had tried to make it work for a week, but she just couldn't bring herself to accept this new version of him. He was not even ready to let her leave because he claimed that he was in love with her, and he knew that he had found her soulmate, which is why he had convinced her to marry him and he believed that now that she was finally with him, he could turn his life around and all she had to do was just stick by him forever. But let alone forever, Michelle wasn't even willing to stick by him for another week. She had packed all her stuff while he was taking his post-joint nap so she wouldn't have to deal with his drama, since every time she had threatened to dump him and leave, he had started wailing and acting like a little baby and she couldn't get away from him after that because of how he had started to beg her to stay every single time, and it was really pathetic. Michelle had been sobbing while telling me about all of this and I actually felt bad for her because I'm sure it couldn't have been easy for her to find out about these things. But then again, she had only known him for two weeks, and it had been quite foolish of her to get married to him with such little information to go on. If she had even spoken to any of us about this, my husband and I would have warned her, but she chose to keep this a secret from us for some reason.

After telling us about everything, she told me that she needed my help now because she wanted to get out of the situation anyhow. She said that she was in desperate need of a divorce attorney and that she also wanted me to help her out because she wanted to sue him for damages, because of her. of all the emotional distress that he had caused her with his lies and manipulation. I'm a lawyer myself, so I could understand why she had come to me but I told her that there was no way on earth that I was going to take up this lawsuit. It was not just because of personal reasons, it was also because I thought it was partly her own fault as well. Besides, emotional distress was always really hard to prove in court and I did not have the time to deal with her dramatic outburst. I had clients with real problems and lawsuits to deal with. I told her that the

that I could do for her was put her in touch with a good divorce attorney and maybe they would be able to get an annulment but other than that, I was not getting myself involved in this mess. I also told her that if she had just spoken to me about Josh and her relationship with him, I would have warned her about him but at this point, I thought that it was her own fault for rushing into a marriage so quickly. At that point, I guess she realized that my husband and I knew that Josh was not a good guy and then, all of a sudden, she started turning the situation around on us. She told me that if I had known all along that Josh was not the right kind of guy, I should have said something to her about it on the day that I saw her, flirting with him for the

first time when they met, at brunch at my house. And all of a sudden, it was my fault that this had happened. She started yelling at me, saying that if I knew about Josh and the kind of person that he was, then I should have warned her and not let her take this forward. I found that really surprising because like I said, I had no idea that she was even planning on going so far with him. I thought that they were just having a little bit of a flotation at brunch, but after that, I assumed that she would be done with him. Besides, even if I had not wanted her, she should have had the common sense of knowing that she should not get married to a guy that she is barely even known for two weeks. She knew nothing about him and yet she went ahead with him. I think

that's pretty much her fault, not mine. So we ended up in a pretty much nasty fight and she started accusing me of not warning her on purpose because I wanted to mess with her. It was just ridiculous and stupid and I tried to explain to her that this was not the case at all, but she was just not ready to hear me out. She kept screaming at me and after a while, she started telling me that now, I owed it to her to help her out with the legal process for free and I had to make sure that not only did she in that marriage, but she also managed to sue him for damages. She expected me to help her out because she thought that this was all my fault for not wanting her in the first place when I saw them flirting that day. We kept arguing in circles for a while, but after that, I got really tired of talking to her, so I asked her to leave, and when she refused, I started threatening to call the cops and that's when she finally left.

But even after that, she hasn't stopped bothering me in the entire day today. She has been trying to call me and text me. I have blocked her, but she's using a burner phone and creating multiple accounts to talk to me, and I just don't know how to shake her off. My parents are no help in this situation either because they also think that I should help her out because she's family and the fact that I'm holding her accountable as victim blaming according to them. I don't think that's the same thing. I think I'm just calling her out on her stupidity and she's not a victim of anything apart from her own idiotic decisions.

Anyway, I just want to know, Ida, for not warning my sister about my husband's creepy cousin and helping her out with her lawsuit? Update 1. So it has been three days since my sister visited me and since then, she has been trying to get on my very last nerve nonstop. I don't know why she feels like she is entitled to my legal help for free, but I decided to visit my parents today and make it very clear to her that I was not helping her out under any circumstances. I knew for a fact that after she had left the other day, she had obviously gone to live with our parents because according to what she had told me, she had ended the lease on her apartment the day after she got married and she couldn't exactly go back there because she had had a huge fight with her landlord because she

refused to pay the rest of the rent that she owed for this month. He let her go, but he blacklisted her, so she couldn't return and obviously there was no way that she was going back to stay with Joshua the only place that was left for her to go to was our parents, and of course, I found her there when I visited them today after work. She was actually the one who opened the door to me, and as soon as she saw me standing outside, she slammed the door shut in my face. I patiently waited outside for somebody to open the door once again and then, my mom let me in. When I finally went in, Michelle was no longer anywhere in my sight, and my parents told me that she had locked herself in her room because she did not want to see me. It was really weird that she did not want to see me,

but she still wanted my help. But anyway, I told my parents about what had been going on and how she had been bothering me nonstop and that I needed them to put an end to it. And they told me something very surprising, that apparently, they had already put my sister in touch with a lawyer and they were in the process of filing for lawsuit against Josh for all the emotional distress that he had caused her and they were also going to be separated soon so she really did not need my help as such. But when I asked my parents why she was still texting me and calling me if she did not even need my legal advice, they told me that she just wanted me to acknowledge the fact that I had messed up. Basically, she was doing all this and being so extra because she wanted an apology out of

of me and there was no way on earth that she was getting one. The bottom line is that I'm not really sorry because she messed things up for herself. I had nothing to do with any of that. And for her to expect me to apologize and then start crying about it when I don't, it's just entitlement at its best and I was just not having it. I tried to explain to my parents that I was caught up with preparing for my wedding and stuff, of course, the only thing on my mind was not going to be Josh and Michelle. Especially when I didn't even think that there was anything going on between them and I was so sick of repeating that over and over again that I ended up getting a bit loud. My parents also looked pretty exhausted and they told me that they really did not want to

get involved in this because so far, we had always been able to manage our own differences and deal with them like adults and they would expect us to do the same even now. But the only thing they wanted to tell me was that Michelle was just disappointed that I hadn't been looking out for her because as her older sister, she had always believed that I would get her out of trouble, no matter what. But now, it felt like I was just interested in making her out to be an irresponsible brat and she already felt stupid and worthless after everything that had happened. My reaction had just made it worse. That is why she had expected an apology out of me and they were on her side on this one, that I had been really harsh on her, given the circumstances that she was facing right now. They expected me to go easy on her and cut her some slack after everything that she was going through. But instead, I had started victim blaming and they really didn't think that it was a nice thing to do. And then, they called me out for yelling at them for something that was not even their fault and told me that if this was the tone that I was going to take with them, then they would prefer for me to leave because they did not want any unnecessary drama. It was really frustrating for me to deal with the situation at the time because it felt like they were just simply refusing to see my point and re-bent on making me look like the bad guy here, even though I hadn't done anything to deserve that. But I did not want to lose my temper even more and give them more reasons to make me the villain, so I tried not to say anything else and just left.

After I came back home, I discussed it all with my husband and thankfully, at least he's on my side here. I'm obviously not very happy about how the situation has turned out with my family and I feel like I'm being pushed to a corner, but I still don't think that I'm wrong. I'm just exhausted, to be really honest, and I want things to go back to being the way they used to be before all this. Update 2, hey, so it has been two weeks since my last visit to my parents' place, and after that visit, my sister did not make any attempts to contact me. There was just radio silence from Michelle and my parents also did not bother to try and get in touch with me. I felt a little upset about it, but there was really not much that I could do, and in a couple of days, I'm going to be leaving for my honeymoon anyway, so I decided to move past that episode and try to focus on the future because I knew for a fact that there was

no good that was going to come out of thinking about what had already happened. I knew that I had not done anything wrong and I was going to stick to that. And my husband was on my side. And my husband was on my so that's all that I really needed. But today, when I came back home, my husband was already there, and along with him, my parents and Michelle were also waiting for me in the living room. When I walked into the house, quite unexpectedly, Michelle literally launched herself at me and hugged me and did not let me go for almost two minutes. I was really shocked, but eventually, I heard her back and I ended up crying because regardless

of everything that happened, she was still my sister. She was still the little girl who looked up to me for everything since she was a kid and this was probably the worst fight that we had had in ages. But then again, what are families there for if not pulling you through your darkest times? After the hug, she immediately started apologizing to me profusely and told me that it had taken her a really long time to keep her ego aside and accept the fact that she had messed up and none of this was really my fault, but she was just looking for somebody to blame because she couldn't accept that she had been so stupid. after she realized she did not waste a second in coming to me and she had even convinced our parents that they had been wrong for siding with her. She realized that because I was the older sibling, I had always been treated as more mature and that's why I had been forced to grow up and always

forgive everyone. But this one time that I had decided to put my foot down, it was up to them to make it up to me and not let this relationship go. After that, we ended up having a really long chat about everything that happened in the past couple of weeks and my parents acknowledged the fact that because Michelle was younger, she always got away with a lot of stuff and they hadn't even realized it until she herself brought it up with them. My parents also apologized to me for trying to make me look like the bad guy and said that they had been wrong all along and promised me that they would try to be better now. They also seemed to get really emotional and I'm getting these two weeks of no contact with my family must have been difficult for them as well. All of them seemed to be

really upset and apologetic about everything that has happened and I can't say that I've already forgiven them and put everything in the past, but I would like to do that. After all, I believe that families should stick together and I want to give them a second chance. Whether that's going to be a good decision or a bad one, that's for us to find out later but until then, I want to try. Anyway, Michelle is getting a divorce and it's coming along well for her. She decided to drop the idea of filing a lawsuit against him for damages because it was going to be really hard to prove and she did not have that kind of time for any of this. She also acknowledged that she had been stupid

and this was really her fault for being so reckless her entire life. But now that she had had to face such severe consequences, she was probably going to think twice and become a little more responsible instead of still being the wild child of the family. And I'm glad that she was able to come to the conclusion, I think it's about time that she did. All of us sat together and talked for a while before it was time for everyone to leave and surprisingly since I was leaving for my honeymoon in a couple of days,

they told me that all three of them had pooled together some money and they would love to finance the trip. I was a bit skeptical, but then they told me that they really wanted to make it up to me, and after some convincing, they transferred the money to my account so that was a really nice and sweet gesture and I'm going to keep that in mind while my husband and I are traveling. For now, we are just looking forward to the honeymoon and hope that everything goes well with my family and that the second chance that I've given them is not something that I end up regretting. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. Update 3, hey, everyone.

It has been close to two years since I posted an update, but I guess what I found out recently, it's worth posting. So my husband and I are pregnant and I'm in my second trimester now. I randomly thought about posting here all of a sudden today and well, here I am. I know a lot of you must be curious about how things turned out to be with my family and I'm really happy to tell you guys that it turned out well. Ever since I had that last fallout with them two years ago, they had been on their best behavior in Michelle

and I still have some disagreement sometimes but we always make it up to each other and it's never as severe as what happened two years back. Everybody in the family is really excited for the baby, of course, my husband and I are really excited to be embracing parenthood. My in-laws and my parents are also really excited to become grandparents for the first time, but most of all, it's Michelle, who is excited to become an aunt and has been visiting us every other day, taking really good care of me, reading all the books that I read and just being there for me all the time. I'm really grateful that I decided to give them a second chance

because I wouldn't trade this experience for anything in the world. And I know for a fact that my baby is going to be just as loved as I am, if not more. I hope you enjoy this story. Sibling who constantly envied my achievement sabotaged my relationship by having an affair with my spouse and impregnating them. Consequently, our guardians excluded him from their substantial inheritance of $8 million. He begged me to take him back. This might be a long rant, but I'm still in shock over everything that's happened, and I really need to get it off my chest. This is going to be a long one, so buckle up. Let me start with the fact that my brother and I always had a tricky bond. It took me a while to realize that he didn't like me. And then,

Very soon that dislike turned into pure hatred. I never knew what exactly was it that I had done, but he hated my guts. I don't know where it came from, but he wouldn't let a single moment go to waste where he could say stuff like I was spineless, and that I was pretending to be better than him. But the truth is, I just worked hard and tried to make something of myself. Our parents weren't wealthy, but they did their best to provide for us. They always encouraged us to pursue our dreams and work hard, but my brother never seemed to take that advice to heart. Growing up, I was always the good kid. I got good grades, participated in extracurricular activities, and tried to help out around the house as much as I could.

My brother, on the other hand, always seemed to resent that. He barely scraped by in school, and it was as if every achievement I had became another reason for him to dislike me. I remember one time in middle school when I won a school award for academic excellence. I was so excited and proud to show my parents, but the look on my brother's face was pure disgust. Later that night, he told me I was a show-off and that nobody cared about the stupid certificate. It wasn't just that one incident either. It became a pattern. When I made the high school basketball team, he called me a try-hard. When I got a part-time job to save up for college, he accused me of being a kiss up to our parents,

trying to look like the perfect son. The resentment was relentless, and no matter what I did, he found a way to tear me down. I didn't understand why he was like this, but after a while, I stopped trying to figure it out. It became clear that nothing I did would ever be enough to gain his approval or even basic respect. The worst part was that our parents were caught in the middle. They tried their best to treat us equally, but even their efforts to keep the peace became twisted in his mind. If they praised me for something, it was favoritism in his eyes. If they tried to encourage him to do better, he'd accused them of comparing him to me. And to be honest, I also felt like they had a soft space in their hearts for my brother.

So, to sum it up, our home basically became a battlefield, and it seemed like no one could win. My brother's bitterness consumed him, and instead of seeing me as someone who just wanted to succeed, he saw me as competition in a race he was never willing to run. As we grew older, the divide between us only widened. I went to college on scholarships, something that infuriated him even more. He dropped out of community college after a year, blaming the system and everyone but himself. He never took responsibility for his failures, always finding a way to blame someone else most of the time, that someone was me. He told anyone who would listen that I thought I was better

than him, that I was a fraud, pretending to be something I wasn't. In reality, all I was doing was trying to build a future for myself. But to him, my success was a personal attack. Our relationship completely deteriorated when I got married. My wife, who was always kind and welcoming, tried to get along with him, but he didn't even give her a chance. At our wedding, I overheard him telling one of his friends that I was a joke, that I'd never make it last, and that he'd give it a year. I brushed it off at the time, thinking it was just his usual bitterness talking, but looking back now, I see it for what it was a warning. He couldn't stand to see me happy and was already laying the groundwork for the chaos he would eventually unleash on my

life. As the years passed, I settled into married life, focusing on my career and the possibility of starting a family. My brother's life, on the other hand, was a mess. He bounced from one dead-end job to another, never staying anywhere long enough to build any stability. His relationships were just as unstable short-lived flings, toxic breakups, and constant drama. But somehow, despite the differences in our lives, he still managed to worm his way into my personal affairs. At first, I didn't think much of it. He would come around every night. and then, asking for money or a favor, and I'd help him out when I could. I felt sorry for him. I figured he was struggling, and maybe if I helped, he'd turn things around.

I didn't realize then that his bitterness had already evolved into something far darker. It was subtle at first small comments, passive aggressive jabs at family gatherings, little reminders that he was still there, lurking in the background of my life. I tried to help him out. I put the family matters aside, and offered to put in a good word for him at my company, to help him with his resume, and even to pay for some vocational training. But he always refused, saying he didn't need my charity. He'd accused me of rubbing my success in his face, of trying to make him feel inferior.

It was exhausting, but I kept trying because, well, he was my brother. Things started to go downhill about a year into my marriage. My brother suddenly started showing up at our house unannounced, just dropping by when I wasn't home. He'd claim he just wanted to hang out, to reconnect. I was skeptical, but my wife encouraged me to give him a chance. She thought it was sweet that he wanted to mend our relationship. If only I had known then what I know now. But then he started paying a suspicious amount of attention to Emily.

There was something off about the way he interacted with my wife. I confronted him about it once, but he just laughed it off, saying I was being paranoid. My wife didn't see the harm in it, so I tried to let it go. I wanted to believe that maybe he had changed, that maybe he was just trying to rebuild the relationship we never had. Over the next few months, my brother became a constant presence in our lives. He'd be at our house almost every day, always when I was at work. I thought it was strange, but Emily assured me it was.

fine. She said they were just talking, that my brother needed someone to listen to him. I wanted to believe her, to believe that my brother was finally turning a corner. But then things started to change. Emily became distant. She'd pick fights over the smallest things, accused me of not understanding her. My brother, meanwhile, was suddenly full of advice on how to treat my wife, and how to be a better husband. It was surreal. guy who couldn't keep a job or a girlfriend for more than a few months was now giving me marriage advice. I should have seen the signs. The lingering looks between them, the inside jokes, the way they'd stop talking when I entered the room. But I was blind, too trusting,

too hopeful that my brother had finally changed. It all came crashing down six months ago. I came home early from work one day, hoping to surprise Emily with flowers and a nice dinner. Instead, I was the one who got the surprise. I walked in on my brother and Emily in our bed. In that moment, my whole world shattered. The next few weeks were a blur. Emily moved out, claiming she needed time to think. My brother disappeared, probably hiding out at our parents' place.

I was left alone, trying to piece together how my life had fallen apart so quickly. When I finally confronted my brother, his response left me. me speechless. He looked me straight in the eye and said that he had nothing to lose. According to him, I always had everything, and he had nothing. So, he took the one thing that mattered most to me, my wife. I was devastated. Not just by the betrayal, but by the realization that my own brother, my flesh and blood, could be so cruel. He had destroyed my marriage, my trust, my family, all because of his twisted resentment. I filed for divorce shortly after. Emily tried to apologize, to explain, but I couldn't bear to listen. My brother, unsurprisingly, was nowhere to be found.

I threw myself into my work, trying to forget the pain and betrayal. And then, just when I thought things couldn't get any more complicated, they did. Emily reached out to me about two months ago. She was pregnant. And the baby was my brothers. I was numb. It felt like a sick joke like the universe was playing some cruel prank on me. But it was real. My soon-to-be ex-wife was carrying my niece or nephew.

The child of my brother and the woman I had loved and trusted. For weeks, I didn't know what to do. I avoided my family, ignored Emily's calls, and tried to pretend none of this was happening. Every day felt like a blur of confusion and betrayal, and the weight of it all was suffocating. But reality has a way of catching up with you, and it wasn't long before everything came crashing down. I thought I could stay away, distanced myself from the mess that my life had become, but my parents weren't having it.

Last week, they called a family meeting, insisting that we all sit down and talk. I knew it was going to be bad, but nothing could have prepared me for what happened. When I walked into their house, the tension was thick enough to cut with a knife. My brother was already there, slumped in a chair, looking as angry as ever. We hadn't been in the same room since the confrontation, and the sight of him immediately set my nerves on edge. Emily was there too, her pregnancy now unmistakable. The sight of her made my stomach turn, and I could barely bring myself to look at her. Our parents sat across from us, looking more serious than I'd ever seen them.

The room was silent, the kind of silence that makes your skin crawl, and I could feel the weight of what was about to come. I was honestly prepared that my parents would again try to cover for my brother. My dad was the first to speak. He explained that they had been keeping something from us, something they had never felt the need to share until now. Apparently, years ago, they had inherited a substantial sum of money from a distant relative something they had kept secret, living modestly all this time so as not to speak.

spoil us with the knowledge. Dad continued, explaining that they had invested the money wisely and grown it into something bigger, much bigger. Eight million dollars, to be exact. Let me tell you that the shock was very evident. Our parents, who had always lived so humbly, were secretly sitting on a fortune. Before any of us could react, Mom spoke up and explained that they had always planned to leave the money to both of us, their children, but recent events had forced them to reconsider. By now, I knew what was coming. Dad then explained that in light of everything that had happened the betrayal, the lies, the destruction of my marriage, they had made a decision. The entire inheritance would be going to me. My brother was being cut out completely.

The very next moment the room was in pure chaos. My brother leapt to his feet, his face twisted in rage. He shouted about how unfair it was, how they had always favored me, and how he was being punished for one mistake. But our parents stood firm. They said that his actions had consequences and that betraying his family in such a way couldn't go without repercussions. They told him that this decision was final, that he had made his bed, and now he had to lie in it. But then, something even more shocking happened.

In the middle of his outburst, my brother suddenly stopped. His face suddenly softened. He turned to me, his voice all. almost pleading. He started talking about family about how we needed to stick together, about how blood was thicker than water. He said that we could put the pass behind us, that I should forgive him, and that I should get back together with Emily. He even had the nerve to suggest that I should raise the baby as my own because, after all, it would share my DNA. He actually thought that would be enough to make me forget everything he'd done. I sat there, stunned.

My mind raised, trying to comprehend the audacity of what he was suggesting. This man, who had spent his entire life resenting me, who had destroyed my marriage and gotten my wife pregnant, now wanted me to forgive and forget. All because of money. And that's when I lost it. I couldn't stop myself. I started laughing. It wasn't a happy laugh it was bitter, hollow, the kind of laugh that comes from a place of pure disbelief. I laughed in his face, watching as the hope in his eyes turned to confusion and then to anger.

He was joking, right? I finally managed to say, my voice shaking with a mixture of rage and incredulity. He destroyed my marriage, he got my wife pregnant, and now he wants me to raise his child. All so he can get his hands on the money. My brother tried to backpedal, stammering excuses, but I didn't want to hear it. I cut him off, telling him that he was no longer my brother. That whatever family bond we had was gone. He had crossed a line that could never be uncrossed.

I turned to Emily and told her that while I wouldn't stand in the way of her raising her child, I wanted nothing to do with either of them. The look on her face was heartbreaking. She opened her mouth to say something, but I didn't wait to hear it. I stood up, leaving the room without another word. That meeting left me feeling drained like a weight I had been carrying for years had finally lifted. For the first time in my life, I felt free, free from my brother's resentment. Free from the burden of always trying to make things right, free from the toxic cycle that had

defined my relationship with him. But at the same time, I felt this bizarre emptiness in my chest. The weight of betrayal was still there, and it wasn't something I could easily shake off. It's been a week since the meeting, and I'm still processing everything. I know there are tough times ahead. The divorce still needs to be finalized, and I'm sure there will be more drama with my brother over the inheritance. But part of me wonders if cutting him and Emily off entirely was the right thing to do. He is, after all, still my brother.

And the baby, no matter how it came to be, is innocent in all of this. I've been going over everything in my head, trying to make sense of it. Was I wrong to walk away from it all? Should I have given my brother another chance, and tried to salvage some semblance of a relationship for the sake of family? Or was I justified in cutting him out of my life after everything he did? Ida for laughing in his face and refusing to raise the baby, even though it's technically family.

Update 1. First of all, I want to thank everyone who commented and shared their perspective. on my situation. I can't say I was expecting so much feedback, but your words helped me see things more clearly. I've spent a lot of time reflecting, trying to understand the whirlwind of emotions I've been feeling since everything went down, and it's been eye-opening, to say the least. In the days following the family meeting, my phone has barely stopped buzzing. My brother has been relentless calling me constantly, leaving voicemails, and sending texts that I haven't even bother to read most of the time. The few I have looked at were all variations of the same message, he needs me. He's pleading for my help, claiming he's in over his head and doesn't know how he's

going to raise the baby without my support. He's gone into excruciating detail about how difficult things are for him, how he can't do it alone, and how, as the baby's uncle, it's my duty to step up. At first, I tried to ignore it. But it's hard to ignore someone who is bombarding you with dozens of texts a day, all saying the same thing. My brother seems to think that if he just keeps pushing, eventually I'll cave in. But the truth is, every message he sends makes me even more sure that I'm doing the right thing by staying away. It's becoming more and more clear that my brother isn't reaching out because he genuinely wants to repair our relationship he's doing it because he's scared. Scared of the consequences of his actions, scared of raising the baby alone, and, if I'm being

honest, probably scared of losing out on the inheritance altogether. Then there's Emily. She's been reaching out too, though not as frequently as my brother. I've gotten a few messages from her, mostly apologetic, saying she's sorry for what happened, that she didn't mean for any of this to happen, and that she wishes we could talk. But I can't bring myself to respond. The betrayal still stings too much. In the beginning, when everything first came out, I was so focused. on my brother's actions that I almost ignored the fact that Emily betrayed me too. She wasn't some innocent bystander in all of this she made choices.

She let herself be manipulated, or maybe she wasn't manipulated at all and simply made a decision. Either way, it's hard to look at her and not feel a deep sense of hurt and disappointment. I've also been hearing things from some of my parents' neighbors, and it's got me worried. Apparently, my brother has been causing a lot of trouble at my parents' house. According to the neighbors, he's been showing up unannounced, banging on their door at all hours, crying and begging to speak with them. One neighbor even told me they heard him shouting about the inheritance, calling my parents' liars, and saying they owed him. I can't believe the nerve of him, going to their house and causing a scene like that after everything he's done. It seems like he's

reaching a breaking point, and I'm starting to fear for my parents' safety. I'm planning on visiting my parents soon, just to check in and make sure they're okay. I haven't spoken to them since the bombshell about the inheritance, and part of me feels guilty for that. They've always been there for me, supporting me through everything, and now that things have taken this ugly turn, I haven't been there for them like I should have. But to be honest, I'm dreading the conversation. I know they'll want to talk about the inheritance, about the future, and about what I'm going to do next. And I'm still not sure what to say. I keep hoping that the situation will calm down, that my brother will finally accept that his actions have consequences and stop

trying to force his way back into my life. But I know that's probably wishful thinking. If anything, it feels like things are going to get worse before they get better. My brother has always been relentless, always pushing until he gets what he wants, and I don't see him giving up any time soon. At this point, I don't know what to do. I'm trying to focus on moving forward with my life, but it feels like I'm stuck in this never-ending loop of drama and betrayal. I'm dreading the thought of having to deal with my brother's anger and entitlement for who knows how long. And Emily, I don't know if I'll ever be able to face her again. Part of me wants to cut them both out of my life for good, to move on and never look back. But another part of me wonders if that's too harsh.

I've been asking myself these questions non-stop, and I still don't have an answer. Maybe I'll never have one. But I do know one thing for sure I can't keep living like this, caught between anger, betrayal, and guilt. Something has to give. Update 2. A few days after the chaos of the family meeting, I finally made the decision to visit my parents. I had been putting it off, unsure of how to face them after everything that had happened. But the constant news from their neighbors about my brother's escalating behavior left me no choice. I couldn't just sit by and let him continue to terrorize them. They didn't deserve that not after the stand they'd taken against him, and certainly not after years of trying to support both of us. When I arrived at their house,

I could see the exhaustion etched into their faces. My mom looked like she hadn't slept in days, and my dad seemed worn down in a way I hadn't seen before. They were both so tired, not just physically, but emotionally. My brother had been showing up unannounced almost daily, making a scene outside their home, and shouting loud enough for the neighbors to hear. He'd been trying to guilt-trip them into reconsidering their decision,

making up stories to paint himself as the victim in front of anyone who would listen. When that didn't work, he turned to outright harassment, raising his voice, banging on the door, and trying to attract attention in any way he could. Sitting down with them, I could tell how much this whole ordeal was weighing on their minds. My dad was the first to speak, his voice heavy with fatigue. He explained that they had given my brother chance after chance, hoping he would calm down, hoping he would eventually realize the gravity of what he'd done. But instead, he had only ramped up his efforts, growing more desperate by the day.

My mom said to me that they couldn't take any more of this and they had done everything they could but their older son was just not going to stop. They looked at me then, and I realized what they were asking. They wanted me to make a decision about the inheritance. It was clear they had made up their minds my brother wasn't getting anything. But now, they were passing the responsibility to me. It was my money, and they wanted to know what I intended to do with it. They weren't pushing me in any particular direction.

But I could see the unspoken plea in their eyes. They just wanted peace. I could feel the weight of their words settle on my shoulders. For a moment, I thought about all the years I had spent trying to be the better person, trying to rise above my brother's cruelty. But this wasn't just about me anymore. My parents were tired too tired to keep fighting this battle alone. And as much as I had tried to stay out of the mess my brother had created, I knew I had to step up now.

Not just for myself, but for them. Just as I was about to speak, we heard the sound of tires on gravel. I glanced out the window, and sure enough, my brother was pulling into the driveway. The tension in the room skyrocketed, my parents exchanged nervous glances. I knew exactly why he was here. He was going to try to grovel again, maybe offer some half-baked apology, hoping that I'd magically change my mind and hand him a slice of the inheritance. But after everything that had happened, there was no way that was going to happen.

I didn't wait for him to knock. I stood up and opened the door, blocking him from coming inside. The look on his face told me everything I needed to know. He was there to grovel, probably hoping that his sad little story would soften my heart. But I was done. Before he could even launch into his pitiful speech, I cut him off and told him not to waste his breath and that he wasn't getting a single penny from me. I could see the shock register on his face, but I didn't stop.

I said to his face that all he ever did was bully me, tear me down, and make my life miserable. And now, after he had destroyed my family, he must have been delusive. to think that I owed him anything. He started to stammer, trying to backpedal, but I wasn't in the mood for any of it. I told him that I didn't care what sob story he came up with this time, but he had made his choices, and now he had to live with them. I could feel my parents behind me, their unease growing as the confrontation escalated. But I wasn't finished. I looked him dead in the eye and told him that Mom and Dad have been more than generous by not calling the cops on him for the way he have been harassing them. But I'm not as patient as they are and if he kept showing up at their

place, making their lives hell, I will call the police. And I won't hesitate to press charges. For a moment, there was silence. I could see the panic flash across my brother's face as he realized I wasn't bluffing. He knew that I meant every word. And then, just like that, his whole demeanor changed. The fake bravado he'd been wearing like armor crumbled, and he shifted into his victim role, the one he'd been practicing for years. He started talking again about how hard his life had been, how everything had gone wrong for him, and how he had nothing left. He rambled on about the baby, how he needed my help, how we were still family. But none of it mattered to me anymore. I had heard it all before, and I was done listening. My parents remained silent,

watching as my brother's story grew more pitiful with each passing second. I could tell they were uncomfortable with how far things had gone, but they didn't interrupt. I think they knew, just as I did, that nothing was going to change unless someone put their foot down. Eventually, realizing that no one was going to give him what he wanted, my brother stopped talking. He stood there for a moment, waiting for someone to say something, but the silence stretched on. Finally, he turned and walked back to his car. There was no more anger, no more pleading, just resignation. He knew that no one was going to listen to him anymore.

As I watched him drive away, I felt a strange sense of relief. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I was in control of my life again. My brother had spent years trying to tear me down, but now he was out of options. I wasn't going to let him drag me or my parents down with him. After he left, I turned back to my parents. They looked at me, clearly relieved, but also a little shaken. I knew this hadn't been easy for them. Cutting ties with their own son wasn't something they had ever imagined they would have to do.

But they understood that this was the only way forward. We couldn't keep living in the shadow of my brother's toxic behavior. The rest of my visit was quieter, but the air felt lighter somehow. We talked about the future, about what I wanted to do with the inheritance. They didn't pressure me, but they made it clear that it was entirely my decision. For the first time, I felt like I had real control over my own destiny, free from my brother's constant resentment and manipulation. I knew that things weren't over yet there would be more drama, more.

fallout for my brother's actions but for now, I felt a sense of peace. I had finally stood up for myself and that felt damn good. Update 3, a few weeks passed, and the divorce proceedings were nearing their end. Since Emily and I were in agreement, it was uncontested, which made the process much quicker than I had anticipated. I couldn't say it was easy, but there was a sense of finality to it. The marriage, the betrayal, all of it was coming to an official close. However, there was one thing I knew I needed to do before I could fully move on. With the $8 million inheritance, I knew I had more money than I would ever need. It wasn't lost on me how ironic it was that my brother's resentment and actions had led to this inheritance being mine alone.

But I wasn't the type to let it go to waste or hoard it out of spite. I made some smart decisions, investing a significant portion into safe stocks, real estate, and other ventures to secure my financial future. My parents, though, had always been passionate about giving back, and I asked if there were any charities they wanted to support with part of the money. They had a few in mind causes they had quietly supported for years and we made donations in their name. It felt right to give back in some way, to use the money for something positive, rather than letting it be a constant reminder of everything that had gone wrong. But there was still one more thing I needed to take care of, Emily and the baby. Despite everything that had happened between us, I didn't hold anything against the child. The baby would be innocent in all of this, and he or she didn't deserve to pay for the sins of their parents.

I reached out to Emily and set up a brief meeting. It wasn't about reconciliation far from it, but rather about clarifying that I was setting up a trust fund for my niece or nephew. I made it clear that this wasn't about her or my brother, but about ensuring the child would have a secure future. It wasn't their fault their parents had made such terrible choices, and I wasn't going to punish them for that. The meeting was brief and to the point. I wasn't interested in lingering or reopening old wounds. But during the conversation, I learned something that didn't surprise me as much as it should have. My brother had abandoned Emily and the baby.

After all his groveling, all his begging for me to step up and provide for the child, he had decided to leave them both when his manipulation didn't work. The irony wasn't lost on me. The same man who had destroyed my marriage and begged me to help him raise this child had now walked away from both of them without a second thought. It was strange, but I didn't feel anger when I heard that. I just felt a sense of finality. My brother had shown, yet again, who he truly was, and I was no longer surprised by his behavior. The trust fund would ensure that the baby wouldn't suffer because of their father's failures, and that was all I could do.

I didn't need to get involved in their lives any more than that. My chapter with Emily, and with my brother, was finally closed. As I walked away from that meeting, I felt lighter. I had done the right thing, the responsible thing, and now I could move on with my life. The inheritance was taken care of, my parents were safe from my brother's harassment, and I had ensured the child's future. All the loose ends were tied up. Or so I hoped.

For now, though, I'm content. I've made my peace with everything that's happened, and I'm ready to move forward. Thanks to all the support from this community, I've gained the perspective I needed to navigate this mess. I don't know what the future holds, but I know that I've done everything I can to close this chapter of my life the right way. Thank you, Reddit, for all the advice and encouragement. This is where I say goodbye and hope this is the end of it all. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse compelled me over an extended period to disclose my past distress from childhood,

then weaponized it in an argument by suggesting that my harmful father should have called me, and when I challenged. Hershey admitted she lost respect for me after learning about my past. I do not even know how to write this because my head feels like it is splitting in two. I keep hearing the words again and again and I cannot believe they came out of her mouth. We have been married 14 years. We built what I thought was a stable life together. Two kids, our son who is 12 and our daughter who just turned 11.

They are my entire world. When I look at them I feel the kind of love I never knew existed, because the truth is I never experienced that kind of love as a child myself. That is something my wife has always known about me, though it took years before I could say it out loud. When we first got married, she noticed how I never talked about my parents. She noticed I avoided talking about childhood. She would tell me her stories, warm holiday memories, her parents decorating the house, sibling arguments that turned funny later. I would just nod and smile. She told me she wanted to understand me better, to really know me. Over the years she kept pressing,

until one day she begged me to open up. So I did. Seven years ago I finally told her everything. I told her I was never meant to be here. I was the fourth child after three siblings, a failed contraception baby. An accident, that is the word my parents used. They reminded me constantly that they did not want me. It was not subtle. It was not hidden. It was spoken outright. I I told her about the amusement park when I was nine. The day they tried to get rid of me. They left me behind on purpose. I knew it even at that age.

They thought I would panic, wander off, disappear. What they did not expect was that I had already memorized the road home. Hours later they acted like it had been a mistake, like they lost me in the crowd, but I knew what it was. I knew what they had intended. I told her about the night my father wrapped his hand. around my throat and squeezed until the world went dark at the edges. I could not breathe. My head felt like it would explode.

To this day I do not know why he let go. Maybe my mother walked in, maybe something inside him pulled back at the last second. Whatever it was, I lived. Barely, but I lived. I told her about the food. How some nights everyone else ate and I sat there watching. Not because we were poor. We had enough.

But because I was excluded. If they bought something good, they shared it among themselves, never with me. I remember sitting at that table as a child, stomach empty, watching them laugh while I pretended not to exist. I told her how they never missed a chance to remind me I was an accident. My parents said it. My siblings picked it up. It became the running joke. That I should not exist.

That I was the mistake they could not erase. I told her how once they admitted they had planned to abort me but never went through with it. They said it with no hesitation, as if it were a casual piece of trivia, not a dagger to my chest. And I told her about the winter night when my father locked me outside as punishment for something I did not even do. I was maybe ten. It was freezing. I stood out there shivering, crying, my teeth rattling. I honestly thought I would not make it through the night. A neighbor eventually saw me and banged on the door until my mother opened it.

That neighbor probably saved me. These are the things I poured out to my wife. It was not easy. I remember shaking as I said them. I remember how exposed I felt, like I had ripped open scars I had carefully hidden for years. She hugged me after. She told me she was glad I trusted her. She promised she would never throw those things back at me.

Last night she broke that promise. We argued, it was stupid. It started with our son's homework. She said I was too soft on him, that I let things slide. I said she was too harsh. It escalated. We were both defensive. One of those arguments where you forget the point and just keep trying to win.

And then she said it. She looked straight at me and said maybe my father should have finished what he started that night. I don't even deserve to have a family let alone children. That maybe it would have been better if I had not survived. That I was never wanted anyway and I was the one who told her so. I froze. I actually thought for a second that I misheard her. But she said it again.

Calmly. As if she believed she was simply pointing out a truth. I cannot describe what it is. did to me. I have had cruel things said to me before in my life. I have been insulted, mocked, belittled. I know how to brush words off. But this was different. This was the one person I led into the deepest part of me. She took my pain and turned it into a weapon. I just stood there in silence. I did not even yell back. I could not. It felt like something shattered inside me. The rest of the night I barely spoke.

She acted normal. Like nothing had happened. I went to the spare bedroom and stayed there. I lay awake the entire night hearing her words over and over, blending with my parents' voices from years ago. Their cruel jokes, their reminders that I was unwanted, all coming back with her voice layered on top. I thought about the rage I carried as a teenager. How I used to wish my mother would die painfully. I thought those feelings were buried deep, but last night she dug them up and threw them right back at me.

I cannot move past this morning she was cheerful, as if none of it had happened. I could barely look at her. All I could think was that something inside me had broken. I do not know if it can ever be repaired. Now I am sitting here thinking about divorce. Or at least separation. I do not even know how to start. I do not know what lawyer to call.

I do not know how to explain to the kids why their parents are breaking apart. Part of me wonders if I am overreacting, if this is just a fight gone too far. But I know myself. I know I am not overreacting. Because I cannot imagine ever forgetting what she said. Usually I move on. From almost anything. I swallow pain, bury it, keep going.

But this is not something I can just swallow. This is different. She went to the deepest wound I have and drove the knife in. I need to say this clearly. I need validation. I need someone to tell me I am not crazy for feeling this broken. I need condolences, because I feel like I am spiraling replaying her words in my head. I thought my past was behind me.

I thought I had buried it and moved on. Last night showed me I was wrong. It is not buried. It is alive and it can be used against me by the very person I trusted most. And I do not know how I could ever forgive that. Comments where Op has replied, comment one, you shouldn't. Divorce her. Words matter.

It's over. Oop, Ick so, thinking of starting with separation so that the children adjust, a few weeks, then OFC I am asking some people for advice regarding lawyers. Comment two, first, I am so incredibly sorry that you were abused by your parents as a child. What you endured growing up is absolutely awful, and my heart breaks for you. It seems on to me that you described the fight as little yet she went to such a drastic place as a weapon against you. If she can go that hard over a fairly common point of contention with raising kids, imagine what she'd pull out for something bigger.

I know Reddit seems to jump to leave slash divorce pretty quickly, but I think leaving would be something to seriously think about. If it were me, I don't know that I'd ever be able to get past it. That was lower than a low blow. My goodness, the hurt she hurled at you. I'm so, so, so sorry, sending you a hug from afar and wishing you find peace in your decision and are able to heal again. Hoop, thank you.

She believed that I should be more harsh to them, like maybe little beating to get them to study or shout at them while I am more of a cool person, and would like to speak the same thing thrice over three days if they forgot it. And then we were battling about who does it better. Is this the first time Ups' wife has used his secrets and passed against him? Oop, she has done them, one more time related to my past too, but never this deep. That's why I can't help myself but feel this way. Update, I waited until Tuesday. She went through the weekend and Monday like nothing had happened, a little colder than usual, quick with her answers, acting irritated like I was the one who had caused all of this. No apology. Not even a hint. It felt like I was carrying something heavy while she just moved around it.

By Tuesday afternoon I couldn't hold it anymore. I asked her to sit down with me. The house was quiet. I told her I needed to talk about what she said during the fight, because this wasn't something we could just shrug off. I reminded her that the fight had started because I refused to hit our son while teaching. I told her I don't believe in beating kids to make them learn, and that she had pushed for it. That's where the argument began, and somehow it slid into something so much uglier. I asked her why she used what I told her in confidence against me.

I reminded her that she had asked me to open up years ago, and promised she would keep it safe. I asked her why she hugged me back then if this was where it would end up. At first, she was stiff. She said she didn't know what else she was supposed to do at the time. She told me she just tried to act normal, to be supportive, because she didn't know how to handle what I told her. She said she hadn't realized how heavy at all was until later.

Her voice was even, like she was just explaining facts. I told her the promise mattered. I said it wasn't about a slip in anger. It was that she reached for the exact things I handed her in trust and turned them against me. I asked her again why. That's when she admitted it. She told me she lost some respect for me after I opened up. I asked what that meant.

She said it wasn't one detail, it was the whole picture. She said she had always seen me as solid, someone who could carry weight without bending, the person she leaned on. But after I shared everything, she couldn't stop seeing the brakes under the surface. She said parts of my story made me look fragile to her. Some of the darker pieces, the way those years sat inside me, gave her an uneasy feeling she couldn't shake. Seeing me tear up and feel so nervous and like a wreck, made her look very differently at me. She actually used the wordic. She said sometimes when she remembered those things, it got in the way of how she looked at me.

I asked if that meant she thought less of me for surviving. She said it wasn't about surviving, it was about how it changed what she expected from me. She admitted she had built an image of me that didn't include those kinds of wounds, and once she knew, she couldn't put that image back. I asked her why she hugged me then, why she told me she wanted to know me fully. She said she didn't know what else to do in the moment. She didn't want to punish me for telling the truth. She said holding me and saying it was okay felt like the only decent response at the time, even though, inside, she had already started to see me differently.

I let that sit, then asked the harder thing. She said she couldn't control herself in that moment, and she reached for what she knew would hurt me most. She said she regretted it and that it would never happen again. I also thought about how it might sound from the outside, like maybe I had dumped too much on her back then. But the truth is, I never sat her down and unloaded everything at once. I gave her my story the way she asked for it, piece by piece, only when she pressed me. If she wanted to know something, I answered. I didn't overshare, didn't volunteer random details.

And even then, she probably only ever heard a fraction of what I actually live with. What makes this worse is that I've been to therapy. I've done the work. I wasn't unloading on her because I couldn't carry it myself. The only reason she even heard those parts of me was because she demanded it. She insisted I open up, insisted she wanted the whole picture. She told me she wanted to know me fully. And I believed her.

I trusted her enough to hand over things I never planned on saying out loud. That's why this betrayal feels so much heavier. It wasn't me blurting out things I couldn't control it was me here. handing her pieces of myself because she begged for them, swore she'd hold them safe. And then she took those same pieces and cut me with them. It feels like giving someone your heartbeat because they said they wanted to hold it close, and then watching them drive a knife straight through it. After she said all of that, I just sat there for a while. It was like I'd finally gotten the truth behind everything, but it didn't settle in cleanly. I wasn't shocked

anymore, more resigned. I also thought about how it might sound from the outside, like maybe I dumped too much on her back then. But the truth is, I never sat her down and unloaded everything at once. I gave her my story the way she asked for it bit by bit, only in response to her questions. If she wanted to know something, I told her. I didn't add anything extra, didn't volunteer your random details. And even then, she probably only heard a quarter of what I actually carry. Why was she so intent on me being open and emotionally vulnerable then? I told her I didn't think I could just go back to how things were. I said I felt like the foundation was cracked in a way I couldn't ignore. I told her maybe the only way forward was to separate amicably,

quietly, before things got any worse. I said I didn't think I could keep looking at her the same way, not after knowing she could turn something so personal into a weapon. That's when her whole tone shifted. The firmness she had when she explained herself dropped, and she sounded almost panicked. She asked me not to say that, said she didn't want a divorce. She told me she still loved me, that whatever she had done in anger wasn't bigger than the life we had built.

She couldn't imagine splitting the kids between us, couldn't imagine them growing up in two houses. She told me leaving would scar them more than anything we had been through. I told her love isn't supposed to look like tearing each other apart with the sharpest words we can find. She said she knew that, and promised again that it wouldn't happen anymore. She said she had already admitted it was wrong and she meant it when she said she'd never go there again. She kept circling back to the same point, that we had kids, that they needed us together, that whatever issues we had, we had to fix them without breaking the family apart.

She didn't cry, but there was a kind of desperation in her voice. Almost like she was afraid I was already out the door and she was trying to pull me back any way she could. She didn't apologize again for what she'd said, not directly, but she kept stressing that it would never happen again, that I shouldn't throw everything away over one mistake. Right now, I haven't made a final decision. I keep going back and forth in my head. Part of me feels like the damage is too deep and I'd be lying to myself if I pretended I could ever really see her the same way again. But another part of me hesitates, because walking away isn't simple when there are kids and years of life tied together.

I'd be lying if I said I wasn't leaning more in one direction the end than the other, but I'm not there yet. I feel heavy most days, caught between wanting to protect myself and not wanting to tear my family in half. Some moments I think I know what I have to do, then I second guess it. It's draining, but at least writing this down and hearing different perspectives has made me feel less alone in it. Thank you to everyone who's taken the time to read, comment, or even send me a message directly. It means more than I can put into words. I couldn't respond to every single individual, but I have gone through all of the comments maybe even twice. Thank you, strangers.

Next story, friend asked my daughter to be her flower girl, but when the dress didn't fit ten days before the wedding she called my daughter a whale, so I skipped the wedding. I, 35F, am still friends with some of the people I went to college with. One of them, Debbie, fake name, 36F, got married this past January, after being engaged for two years. Early in the planning process, Debbie had asked my six-year-old daughter, who was five at the time, to be the flower girl. We agreed, and she had the dress sent to us right away. We barely spoke about the subject for a while. Then the wedding was delayed by almost a year, the original date was in March 24th. I'm still not sure why, I've heard three or four different

reasons. By the time the actual wedding date came around, the flower girl dress did not fit my daughter anymore. We didn't find out until roughly 10 days before the wedding, admittedly my fault, and I texted Debbie right away to ask what I should do about it. Her first reply was figure it out. I tried to ask her where she bought the dress, where I could get a similar one or whether it would be okay for my daughter to wear a different dress. I basically gave her a list of ways I could fix this and asked her what she preferred. Debbie responded with I don't have time for this. Stop making your whale daughter my problem. Obviously, I decided against attending the wedding after that.

As far as I'm concerned, we're no longer friends. And to be clear, I know that up until this point, I was not the awe. I didn't tell anyone about it at first, but our absence was obvious, my friends missed me, and my daughter was supposed to be the only flower girl. Whenever Debbie was asked about it, she apparently just said we had an argument, but it wasn't a deal. When our mutual friends and acquaintances asked me, I told them the truth, without sugar-coding it or trying to defend Debbie. I even showed my friends the text messages that proved everything. Everyone took my side. About a week ago, Debbie called me. She apologized for

what she said about my daughter, but told me I have no idea how stressed she was at the time. She said it wasn't fair for her to lose friends over a mistake she'd made when she was under so much pressure. Again, I don't think I was in the wrong for skipping the wedding, but I'm wondering whether I took it too far by telling our mutuals why. Edit, yes, I know I should have made sure the dress still fit sooner. I already know that was my mistake, and I'm not blaming Debbie for it. That's not what I'm asking about. Update, hey guys. I wasn't going to update, but a friend of mine brought the situation up a few days ago and I remembered posting here.

After my post back in March, I didn't hear anything from Debbie for a while. I did speak to my friends a lot, and they told me that she did continue trying to get them on her side for a while. From what I gather, her story always matched mine. I forgot to make sure the dress fit, I apologized, and asked how she preferred I fixed it. She insulted my kid, and as I remember discussing in the comments, Whale of a daughter is a better translation. Everyone continued taking my side. Apparently, I wasn't the only one Debbie had problems with before the wedding.

My case was just the worst one. There's no doubt that the dress fiasco was my fault. I had a lot going on at the time and several reasons why I forgot to make sure it fits sooner, but no excuse can change the fact that I messed up. But I still don't think giving Debbie. options on how I could proceed was the wrong move. I've been a bride before, and I wouldn't want someone else to make a decision about my wedding without giving me the final say. And I can't ignore that her reaction was to insult my daughter. Debbie first texted me in June. She asked me to

help her clear the air with everyone, because most of our mutuals hadn't spoken to her since April. I was tired of all this, so I told everyone that Debbie had already apologized to me. I made it very very clear that while we're no longer friends, I sincerely don't care whether they remain in contact with her or not. She texted me once again early in July. She told me that a couple of our mutuals were talking to her again, but it wasn't the same as it used to be. She asked me whether I was still mad at her. I told her I'm not, and I wish her the best, but I don't think we can continue this friendship. I said I was sorry for the dress fiasco and I understood that she was stressed at the time, but I'll never be able to look past what she did.

It would have taken her less time to give me directions than it took to call my daughter a wail. I can forgive rudeness with time, but not insults, especially towards my children. We haven't spoken since. I haven't blocked her, but I have no intention of reaching out again, and I don't think she does either. Some of our mutuals are speaking to her again. Both my best friends from that group want nothing to do with her. I sincerely don't care what anyone does. I won't pretend this never happened, but I've moved on.

Like I said, I'm not mad anymore. My daughter will be a flower girl at my cousin's wedding in December, and my family is doing very well. Life has been crazy for a while, but things are finally getting calmer. I won't post here again. Thank you for your time. I hope you enjoy this soon. story. Spouse informed his relatives about my adolescent online harassment ordeal without consent.

Later, his sibling admitted she was the individual who directed threatening messages toward me when we were 14. Now his whole family wants me to forgive her. We got married one month ago, a small ceremony at the courthouse in the morning and a meal after with my parents, his parents, his sister, one cousin, two friends each. We moved into the apartment I had before with the lease in my name since January, and he moved his stuff in through the week after. We split rent and utilities, we both work full-time, on 24, he's 26, we've been together three years and nine months and got engaged last December. He has a record with secrets, not cheating or anything like that, but he repeats information that isn't his to share.

Examples from the last year include, he told his co-worker that another coworker put in notice before the person told the team, he told my friend's boyfriend about her early pregnancy before she hit 12 weeks when she asked that it not be shared, and he told his dad the number from my raise when I only told him. I've said don't share this in direct words after those incidents, and he said he understood and that he talks when he gets excited or when he wants a reaction, saying it does not mean on purpose, but I told him it still causes problems. Two weeks ago we hosted a dinner for his side to mark that we were married with guests including his mom, dad, sister, brother-in-law, and his aunt who flew in on Friday, plus his cousin who lives 20 minutes away.

My parents were out of town, and the plan was pasta, salad, bread, and a cake my friend sent. I bought groceries on Friday night, he cleaned on Saturday morning, and I put my phone on the counter to play music. They arrived between 6 and 6.30 with his mom bringing a bottle of wine and a Hi, his dad bringing beer, and his sister bringing a salad. They hugged and said congratulations with normal talk for the first hour about football, flights, and his aunt's hotel while the TV was off and music was playing. Around 7.30 we were at the table with wine and beer open. He had two beers before dinner and a glass of wine while we ate. His mom had two glasses, the rest had one each, and I had club soda since I don't drink alcohol after 2020 because of panic attacks that started that

year, which is known in both families. After we eight they started trading stories about school, his aunt said someone put gum in her hair in seventh grade, his mom said someone wrote on her locker, his cousin said someone posted about his braces on Facebook, then his mom said I bet mine was worse than anyone's here and said she got prank calls for a month after she broke up with a boy, asking if anyone else had real harassment. My husband said my wife had the worst quickly, I said don't. He snapped his fingers like he remembered and said, right, you don't like to talk about it, then kept going, saying, but it's part of who you are and you're strong now before telling them I got messages on MySpace

for three months when I was 14. He said the account sent threats to show up at my bus stop, posted about my body and said things about photos, that a photo of me at a pool got edited with words on it and sent to classmates, that the school called my parents because the account sent a message to a boy pretending to be me, that the police came to our house to look at my laptop, and added that I switched to a different bus route for a while. I didn't give him permission to share that since I have only told him and one friend, though my parents know because they lived it with me. I have not told his family despite seeing his sister at holidays since 2021 where she and I have shared a couch and talked about pets and jobs. His mom clapped her

hands once and said, See, I told you I had it rough too, but our girl here wins, pointing at me and telling her sister you owe me twenty. Then saying she and her sister had a bed over dinner about who had worse bullying stories in the room. My husband said, I think my wife's takes it and laughed while his mom laughed and the table laughed, but I did not. I took my plate to the sink with my hands shaking, kept the water running and faced the counter when his sister walked to the kitchen saying she needed water. She stood next to me and said I need to say something, I said not right now, she said I have to,

put her cup down and said she was the MySpace person. She said she made the account when she was 14 too, used a fake name and a photo from a singer, and sent those messages to me because the boy she liked like me instead, naming the same boy. She said her friend showed her my profile, she created the account on a library computer and used it at home too, kept it going for three months and then forgot the password, didn't know the police came to our house, and never thought I would marry her brother later. I walked out of the kitchen and went to the bathroom and closed the door, washed my face while I was shaking and breathing fast, then after some minutes walked back to find my husband sitting on the couch with elbows on knees, his dad standing near the sink,

his mom with her hand on her chest saying we're all family, and his sister holding the cup of water saying, I'm sorry. My husband said she just told us too, his mom said it was a decade ago and ten years is a long time. His sister repeated, I'm sorry, and I said I wanted everyone to leave, not yelling, but saying I wanted people out of my home and I would talk another day. His mom said, come on, be reasonable, I said leave, walked to the door and opened it. His dad nodded and told the others to get their things. His aunt said we didn't know, his cousin said nothing, and they left by 8.30. My husband stayed and said he didn't know his sister did it until she said it in our kitchen, that he thought it was safe to share because it was

old and because he wanted to show I had been through things and was strong. I said he had my no on sharing, he tried to explain his mom's bet, I told him I didn't care about the bet and told him I would not have those people in my home for a while. He asked how long, I said I didn't know, he said his sister texted him a longer apology and asked if he could read it to me, I said no and that I didn't want to hear from her. I said I would think about next steps, told him I needed space, he slept on the couch while I shut the bedroom door and did not sleep much. Sunday morning his mom texted a group chat with him, me, his dad, his sister, the aunt, the cousin at 8, 11 a.m. writing, we all said some things last night, we all love each other,

let's have brunch and talk. I did not reply, and at 822 his sister wrote, I'm sorry again, I can write more, I was 14, it was stupid, then at 8.30 his mom wrote forgiveness is freeing. I left the group chat, blocked his sister's number, blocked his mom's number, and told my husband I needed no contact for now, which he said was okay and that he would handle them. Around noon his mom and his sister came to the building anyway, buzzed at the front door, I rejected the call, they called again, I rejected, they called my husband who answered and told them to go. They said they were in the car and wanted to drop food, we said no, but they left a bag with the pie in the lobby anyway with a note that said we love you both, which I left with the front desk.

Monday at work I got a DM on Instagram from a new account with no posts that said you're being a drama queen with the handle having a number and a fake name, and the message saying stop punishing a family for a teenage mistake. I reported it and told my husband, who said he would ask his family if anyone made that. Then five minutes later his sister texted him saying she did not make it while his mom texted him saying she didn't know what Instagram even was. He screenshot those and sent them to me, said he would post a note in the family chat telling them to stop contacting me, and did so at 1237 p.m. writing, do not contact, my name, give her space, do not show up. His dad replied with a thumbs up, his aunt wrote understood, his mom wrote space but not silence is best, and his sister didn't reply, saw through husband's phone. Tuesday his mom called my work desk line at 10.50 a.m. The reception is transferred the call. I answered. She said, I want to hear you say you accept my daughter's apology. I said I'm at work. She talked over me. I hung up. I told my boss and asked to have my desk calls filtered,

send an email to the front desk with the numbers to block, texted my husband that his mom called me at work and I didn't want that ever again. He replied, I'll handle it. I asked him to put it in writing to them, so he texted his mom do not call, my name, at work, and she read it and didn't reply. Wednesday night his sister put an apology on Facebook that tagged me by first name only, writing I heard someone when I was a teen, I've apologized, I hope we can move forward with comments turned off. A mutual from his family texted me a screenshot since I'm not friends with her on Facebook, so I only saw the screenshot and didn't respond. Thursday my husband said he wanted to drive to his parents to pick up some tools he left at their garage and talked to them about boundaries,

left at 6 p.m., got back at 10.30, and said the conversation took a long time with his mom crying and his dad telling him I was controlling him. He said he told them no contact meant no contact, that he would not bring me over, and that he put his foot down, then said he wanted to read me his sister's apology from Saturday night because it had details I might want, but I said no and that I want space. Friday my mom got back in town and came over, I, I told her what happened, she asked if I wanted to file a report for harassment if they kept showing up or calling work since we have the texts and the lobby deliveries and the call log, and said to document everything.

I made a folder in my email and saved screenshots and timestamps, took a photo of the note with the pie, wrote a list with dates and times, and wrote the words people use so there is a record. Saturday we had plans with friends and cancelled. I stayed home while my husband went to the gym and then to his friend's place, texting he would be back by eight but getting back at 840. He said his mom had called him six times while he was out which he didn't answer, showed me the missed calls, said he was on my side and would not force me to accept any apology, and said he would go no contact for now too if I wanted.

I said he can decide his own contact level, but I wanted none with them in my home or phone or work. Sunday morning I got a text from a number I didn't have saved that said this is, sister's name, please which I blocked, then 10 minutes later a text from a different number said please hear me which I blocked, then an email to my inbox from an address with her name said I made a Google Doc with a long apology if you ever want I archived. Monday we had a couple's appointment with a counselor I found through my work EAP for our first session with intake stuff and basic history where we both talked. He said he struggles with impulsive disclosure, the counselor asked him to make a list of things that are mine to tell, he wrote health, money,

work, past, family, she asked him to say what no contact means, he said no calls, no texts, no messages, no shows, no posts, and she asked him to send a written boundary statement to his family by email so there is a record. He sent it that night saying effective now I will not discuss my wife's past, do not contact her in any way, do not post about her, do not show up, violations will result in blocked numbers and police call if needed and see-seat me. I'm writing this because I cut contact with his family after what happened. They are calling me a drama queen through that Instagram DM and through a text from a cousin of his that came from an unknown number saying you're being a drama queen, which my husband read and texted the cousin to stop. I want a record and I also want to say this is the line I'm holding.

I will not speak to the person who ran the MySpace account or to the people who think I need to forgive on their timeline. I am not asking them for anything, not gifts or money or a ride or a place to stay, not using them for child care, not attending their events, not inviting them to mine, I am asking for quiet. I know there is a debate about old harm and apologies, but this is not that for me at this time since this is about consent to share my history, which he did not have. I told him not to share and he did anyway, then the person who caused the messages turned out to be in his family and she confessed at my sink, and she confessed at my sink, and and now they want me to forgive within hours and days and they want brunch and hugs and a picture, which I am not doing. Edit, if you need ages and dates and names for context, here they are, I was 14 from October 2015 to October 2016 with the messages coming November through January for three months.

I have a folder in an old email with some of them because my parents asked me to send screenshots to the counselor we saw then. The account names were summer lightsks and later Sunset Jenny when the first one got locked, and the messages included I know where you wait for the bus with a list of times that matched my schedule, your dad's car is ugly with a photo of our driveway taken from the sidewalk, you will see me Friday with my bus stop number, stop flirting with, boy's name, he thinks you are easy, everyone is laughing at you, and the naked edited pool photo with text over it. The school counselor sat with me and my parents twice a week for the first month, we met with the school resource officer once with no charges

because the account owner wasn't identified, my parents locked down my phone and laptop, I changed my bus stop for two weeks and rode with a neighbor for part of December. The messages stopped in January after winter break, I blocked both accounts. And I changed my MySpace password and deleted the profile later that spring. I know this is old social media. But that is the timeline. The sister says she sent those and knows the bus stop number, named the boy, described my profile photo and naked the pool photo,

and admitted using a library computer once a week on Tuesdays because her mom had an exercise class near there back then and she would wait at the library. I have not argued any of that, I just do not want to speak to her, have not asked for her to be punished, have not asked my husband to stop speaking to her forever, but I've asked for distance from her and his mom and anyone who wants to push me to forgive now. I told my husband I will not host his family in our home for the next year at minimum. He said okay and we can revisit later. He can see. see them elsewhere if he chooses, and if they show up here I will call the front desk and if necessary the non-emergency police line, we agreed on that. I set a camera alert for the building

entrance on my phone from the app we have, added the license plates of his parents and sister to the building watch list as allowed by management, and management said they can record entries and call me if they see those plates. I signed the form and he signed two, that is the state of things today. Edit. The next day at 2.40 p.m. his mom and sister came to the work again, the front desk called me and said they were in the lobby with a bag and a card, I told the desk to tell them I am not accepting visitors, and the desk did that. His mom said she wanted to leave the card, the desk asked me if I wanted to accept a drop off, I said no, they left the bag on a chair and left the building while the desk placed the bag

behind the counter. I went down at 6 p.m. when I was done with work and took a photo of the bag for my record and told the desk to discard it, the desk wrote a note on my account. The desk wrote a note on my account that there had been two visits on two dates and that I had declined, and I forwarded this to my husband and to management. My husband texted his mom, you are violating the boundary, do not come to the U.S. again, she read and did not reply. At 7.10 p.m. there was a post on his sister's Instagram story with a black screen and white text that said accountability is not punishment with no one tagged. At 7.1-2 his cousin texted him she's vague posting, he replied don't, and he turned off his phone for an hour.

We ate dinner, after dinner he turned it back on and there were three missed calls from his mom and one missed from his dad. He texted his dad, I'm okay, please tell mom to stop calling, and his dad replied, I don't control your mother. We sat down and made a document with a timeline and contact log, wrote the dates of the original messages from years ago as I remember them and as saved in the old email, wrote the date of the dinner, the confession, the calls, the lobby visit. the work call, the Facebook post, the Instagram DM, and every text. I put copies in a folder on my desktop and in my Google Drive not because I plan to sue anyone, but because if I ever need it. Edit, two days later his mom tried a different route and texted my mother at 902 a.m. with the message I need your help with your daughter. She is shutting down family.

My mother replied, do not contact me about my adult daughter's boundaries, took a screenshot and sent it to me, I sent it to my husband, and he'd be. texted his mom do not contact, my mother's name, which she read. At 11.30 a.m. my boss called me into her office because someone had called reception again asking for me by name and said this is a family crisis. Reception said they would block the number. I provided the prior email with numbers to block and added this one, told my boss I was handling it, she said document and keep me updated, and I sent myself an email with a time stamp so I would have a record of the meeting. That night my husband went to see his dad at a diner for a one-to-one to see if his dad could calm things down,

they met from 6.45 to 8.15, and he came home saying his dad told him to bring me to a Sunday dinner with an apology ceremony. My husband said no and that I was not a prop. His dad said the family can't move forward until there is a scene where everyone hugs. My husband said we're not filming a show, and he told me his dad's current position is that my wife needs to forgive to be a part of this family. while my husband told him she is my family, his dad said don't say that in that way, and my husband left. We then got a text from his aunt that said, I'm sorry for my part in the bet, I egged your mother on, I regret that, I will not contact my name, unless she initiates, I replied, thank you, please do not contact me, she replied understood, and she has not contacted me since, I am writing that here because not everyone is crossing the line.

Edit. End of the week now and there is a new development where his sister sent my husband the email with the subject line full account. He read it and told me the gist without details I don't want, and he said she admitted to sending the messages I described and also two other things I didn't know. She said she called my house once and hung up when my dad answered, and she said she left a note in my school locker with a cutout from a magazine and a phrase. He asked if I want to see the email, I said no. He asked if he should forward it to me for record. I said no, he asked if he should ask her to send it to him only and not me, I said yes, so he replied to her that I did not consent to receive it and to keep all contact directed

to him, then created a new email folder for this and moved the message there. The same night his mom made a group message on SMS with him, me, her, his dad, his sister writing, we are having dinner Sunday at five, we expect you both. I removed myself and blocked the group, my husband replied to the group separately, we are not coming, stop inviting us, stop creating group threads with, my name, his dad replied, wow, his mom replied you're isolating, his sister did not reply, and he then turned on do not disturb on his phone for the weekend. Saturday morning I got a knock on the door, looked through the peephole and saw his mom and his sister, did not open, and spoke through the door saying leave. His mom said we just

want to talk, I said leave, they stayed for two minutes and then I heard steps, looked out and saw them walking to the elevator, called the front desk to report the visit, and the desk wrote it down and said they would talk to building security about flagging the license plate. I called my husband who was at the store, he drove home, he emailed the building manager with the dates and asked for a formal note put on our unit file that these guests are not to be admitted without prior approval, and the manager replied Monday morning confirming they added a note. Edit, it is the following Tuesday and there has been a sideways move that affects our day-to-day since his mom talked to his grandmother, who is in another state and has my number because she sent a holiday text last year.

She called me at 8.15 p.m. and left a voicemail that said families stick together. I did not return the call and blocked her number. His grandmother then posted on her Facebook page a photo from our wedding meal with a caption about keeping people close and tagged my first name, and I received two messages from older relatives I have met once, telling me to call his mother, I did not reply to. The same day my husband forgot to remove his mother from a shared calendar event he had used for our move dates back in July, he had set that to share with her then so she would know when to bring a piece of furniture but didn't turn it off. Our calendar in August had dinner with friends on Friday at 7. His mom saw it and showed up at the restaurant at 6.50 while

we were not there yet. Our friend texted that she saw his mom near the door, we changed plans last minute and went somewhere else, he removed his mom from the shared calendar in front of me and apologized to our friends via text, then called his mom and told her to leave the area and not to do that again while she said you made the calendar public to me and he said that. Was a mistake and it is removed. Edit A few weeks since the dinner I cut contact with his family on the day after, I still have no contact.

My husband has minimal contact with his dad over logistics for a storage unit they co-lease. he has no contact with his mom or sister, and he told me that on the record. New thing today is that his mother left a review on our wedding registry page that still exists where she wrote Hope You Two Find Peace, not harmful in content but public. I asked my husband to remove her access. He did. He also emailed the registry company to ask for the removal of that public note if possible. They send a general reply saying they don't moderate but we can change privacy settings. He set it to private, and we saved a screenshot. Also new thing is that a friend of his sister from high school DM'd me on Facebook Messenger from a name I don't know with the message she has grown, you should meet her.

I blocked the account and sent a screenshot to my husband. He replied, I don't recognize that name, then messaged his sister ask your friends to stop contacting my wife, she replied I didn't ask anyone, he wrote then tell them to stop if they ask you, and she didn't answer. We met with an attorney for a consult about harassment for 30 minutes, brought our timeline, and the attorney said we can send a formal cease and desist letter to his mother and sister if the visits and messages continue, set a restraining order as possible if there are repeated unwanted contacts after a clear warning, and said to keep our log, save all screenshots, and continue to not engage. We have not sent the letter yet, but will if there is another show up at the building or a call to work.

I changed my phone number yesterday and gave the new number to my parents, my boss, three close friends, and my husband while my old number forwards to voicemail with a message that says to email me. I set email filters to send anything from his family to a folder I don't look at, my husband has access to that folder to monitor for anything urgent, and he agreed to be the point of contact. We also asked building management to keep the no-guess note on file for six months and to call the police non-emergency line if his mother or sister try to push in, and management agreed.

His dad texted my husband that his mom's feelings are hurt. He replied that is not the point. His dad said she is under stress, my husband said stop, and his dad has sent no messages since. We are still married, we are living in the same place, he has not shared anything about me since the dinner, we keep our plan visible on the fridge, he reads it out loud once a week at the counselor's suggestion and sets a calendar reminder for that. I leave the room and he reads it to the empty kitchen, he says it helps him, and I don't have to listen. I don't know where this lands a year from now, but today I have no contact with his family after what happened at our dinner and after the pressure that followed. I hear the words drama queen and I record them and then I move on to the next task at hand since there is laundry to do and bills to pay.

I can move around the apartment without thinking about who might knock since the front desk calls if anyone tries, that is the state of things. Edit, update after week six because something shifted and I want it written down. His sister sent a letter by certified mail to our building that arrived Friday with the envelope having both our names, we refused delivery, the courier left a slip, we took a photo of the slip and emailed our attorney and asked if refusing was the right move. The attorney said yes if we do not want to engage and also said to send a cease and desist now because of the certified mail attempt, so we did it today. It goes to his mother and his sister, states the dates of the incidents, the instruction to cease all contact direct and

indirect, and the possible legal steps, we will see what happens. I'm sharing all this in one place so there is a record of the things that has happened to me. If there is more I will add it. Edit, small update two weeks later, the cease and desist letters came back as delivered and we got the confirmations by email from the attorney. Since then, no knocks, no calls to work, no packages at the door, his mom posted a photo of a dish on Instagram with no captions about family, his sister's account is private now, I have not received any messages from unknown accounts, and my husband had a 10-minute call with his dad about the storage unit schedule where his dad did not mention me or the situation, that is it. We are still having the counseling session.

We also canceled a trip to visit his grandmother in October since the tickets were non-refundable, we used the travel credit for a different trip next year, we accepted the cost, we told no one in his family about the change, and my parents know in case someone reaches out to them. I hope you enjoy this story. The beloved sibling took money and vanished for a span of three years. Upon returning, our guardians declared that he would be the sole heir to their possessions, despite my dedicated efforts to care for them. I, 30M, have an older brother Caleb, 33M, and I really don't like him. We've never gotten along and never. We've never gotten along and never, will. Unfortunately for me, he is the golden child for my parents, just because he used to be a good

kid when he was younger. I don't know what that has to do with the current situation because right now, he's just a gambling addict with no concern for people around him, including our parents. He went no contact with our family about three years back, and with good reason, because he had embezzled money from the company to pay off his personal debts. Then he cut us all off. Instead of reporting him, my parents just decided to fire him and never spoke of it again. They tried their best to hush it all up like it had never even happened. I had to step in to rebuild the business because he had pretty much left it in shambles. I had a business degree, but I wasn't willing to work with my family because then I knew that I would have to work under

my brother, and I did not find that acceptable. After he left, I thought that I had a chance to inherit the business, so I quit my previous job to step in and help my dad out. He showed me how grateful he was for everything that I had done by announcing to the family that my brother would be inheriting the company when he retired in a couple of years. This announcement came, at a dinner party a few weeks ago that he had been hosting specifically to celebrate my brother's return to the family and welcome him back with open arms, even after all that he had done. Don't ask me why they did that. I thought they were blind and stupid, but I didn't think that this would affect the business, so I didn't speak up. About a month ago, my brother randomly reached out to my parents

again and apologized to them for everything that he had put them through. He also thanked them for never reporting him and said that he had been going through a very dark time. He had been out of money and was desperate to pay back all his debts because otherwise he would have to face the consequences, so he really had no option. I really don't buy this, because he always had the option of not getting into gambling at all. Anyway, my parents actually ended up falling for all that emotional BS and responded to him by forgiving him for everything and telling him that he was welcome to come back to the family. I was obviously against it, and I even tried to hint that to my father, but he told me that as a

father, he was ready to forgive whatever his children did. I couldn't argue with that sentimental crap, because, I just didn't want to, so I let it go. Also, at the time, I was pretty sure that even if he was willing to accept him back into the family, of course my parents wouldn't be stupid enough to let him come back to the business again after what he had done. But then, a few days after that, he announced at the dinner party that after his retirement, my brother would be taking over everything, and I just lost it. I was very upset and made it clear that I would not be working under my brother at any cost, so if he was rejoining the business, I was ready to quit.

My parents tried to pacify me. They told me that we could run the business together as brothers, but that made me even more upset, and I ended up screaming at them, telling them that they were messing everything up and that I don't even consider Caleb my brother. After my outburst, I left their place with my wife and kids, and as soon as I got home, I sent my dad my formal resignation. I didn't have anything else lined up, but I knew that I had done good work in the past three years, and even before that, so if I started applying to places, then I would soon be able to get a job. If not that, I could always start my own business with my savings. I spoke to my wife about it after we got back home, and she told me that my outburst was

completely justified. She also, said that she wouldn't recommend hiring anybody like my brother because, given his past, he was clearly unstable and unreliable for them to even consider putting him in the high-stakes position of a CEO. It was just stupid. That made me even more sure of my decision. So later on, when my parents called me up and tried to get me to come back, I made it clear to them that I was not returning until and unless I was promised that he would not be joining

the company, let alone taking over. They tried to argue, telling me that he was my brother and that I owed him a second chance because we were family, but I wasn't hearing them out at all. I told them that if they could promise me what I wanted, then I was not even interested in interested in talking to them. We had a bit of a back and forth for a couple of days, but then they stopped trying to get to me, and I accepted their decision. It was really upsetting because in the past three years, I had worked really hard to undo all the damage that my brother had done to the business while he had been working. I don't even understand how my father had

allowed him to stay. He had absolutely no sense of how a business should be run, but I'm guessing my dad just didn't want to take on too much workload or micromanage my brother at the risk of offending him, so he just stayed quiet and let him ruin his own life's hard work. And now he was about to let it happen once again. But, thankfully, Caleb decided to show his true colors to my parents last evening. Last night, I received a phone call from my parents pretty late, and at first I ignored it, but then they kept trying to call me again and again, so I finally answered, and they were hysterical. Somehow I was able to understand that Caleb hadn't actually come back to make things right with them.

He just needed money. Apparently, he hadn't even quit gambling. He was just trying to make it seem like he was, but once again he was knee-deep in debt and had also been fired from several jobs, so he literally had nowhere else to go. All he could afford was the flight ticket here so he could come to see his parents and ask them for help. But when he saw them again, again, he couldn't afford to let them down once more, and so he kept it, a secret until

now. But since my parents were doing so much for him, he just wanted them to help him clear his debts once more. It was an insane amount of money, and obviously my parents declined because there was no way they could let all that money go all at once. Caleb didn't like that, so he lost his temper and had a huge fight, after which he left. I guess my parents learned their lesson, so they called me up to apologize and to tell me that I was right about everything. They shouldn't have given him a second chance. Now they're begging me to come back to work because they want to keep the business and the family, and I've always done a good job, they've never denied that, so I'm obviously the only person they would consider after this.

But given what had happened recently, how it had been so easy for them to overlook everything that I had done and announced that my brother would take over the company after my dad's retirement, I was not taking any chances. So last night, while they were requesting me to come back and take back my resignation, I told them that I would be back only if my dad promoted me to CEO now. I was not willing to wait for him to retire. I wanted him to start the paperwork this week itself because I was just not willing to take any chances anymore. If they're not ready to do that, I have already applied to a couple of places,

and I had enough savings for a couple of months, so I was completely fine not going back to the family business. My parents did not find that to be an acceptable solution and were pretty outraged that I was even suggesting something like this, so they insisted that I come back and, said that, when the time comes, my dad will definitely let me take over everything. It was a promise that they were making, but only a verbal one, so I told them that it had to be either my way or the highway, and then I hung up. After I disconnected the phone call, my mother started texting me, but I told her that they could sleep on it for one day and then they had to let me know their decision. It was a tough one, but after what I had just been through because of my brother's

return, I was not going to let anything and everything slide just because they were my family. I thought I was being fair enough, and so did my wife. But this morning, when my mother called me up, she was crying on the phone, and she told me that she knew that my dad had made a mistake by announcing that he would let my brother take over, and it had even taken her by surprise. But he was just being a father. He was just thinking about how in the earlier days, before my brother started gambling, he was actually serious about his work, and back then, since I used to work elsewhere, my dad had promised him that he would let him take over when he retired. It has been a purely nostalgia-based decision, and of course they should have been a little

more practical about things, but it was a mistake, and as a family, I should have forgiven that mistake. Then she told me that it was also humiliating for my dad to hear that I wanted him to give up the CEO position so I could take over right now, since that would be technically forcing him into early retirement, and he was not ready to let go of his lifetime's work at the moment. He was obviously not willing to work under me because he is the one who has built this company from the ground up, and neither does he want me working for anyone else anymore because this is the family business, it should stay in the family. My mom told me that my dad wasn't even ready to speak to me right now because he hadn't stopped crying since last night, and all he could

do was blame himself for everything that had gone wrong. She told me that he had been drinking himself blind all night and he finally passed out around four in the morning on the couch itself. She said that she hasn't ever seen him upset like this, and she told me that I'm the only one who can fix it. While we were speaking on the phone, she sounded pretty pretty. miserable too, and now I'm really confused about what to do. I spoke to my wife about this, and both of us feel really guilty about what's happening, but we also think that it's important for us to stand our ground right now. So Ida for demanding that my father give up the position of CEO to me this week. Update 1, thanks for all the supportive comments. My wife and I have

decided that I'm going to stick to my demands. I'm not asking for anything unreasonable. I am not happy that this is making them so upset, but well, I've already given up three years of my life working on my family business, and if I'm planning on giving up even more, which I really do want to because I've obviously developed a good relationship with the employees and continuing seems to be the better option rather than starting somewhere new. Then the least I can ask for is the security that I'll have an undisputed claim on the CEO position eventually. It's been three days since my post, and I took this time to think about what I want to do, and I decided that I do want to rejoin. the family business. I've already put in a lot of time and work there, and just to be clear, I don't want to return because of my parents. I want to go back because I actually do enjoy working in that company. The fact that it would make my parents happy is just an added bonus, that's not the major reason why I'm doing it. The only thing standing in my way now is the fact

that my dad is not willing to retire at the moment, and until he retires, I'm not going to get to take over entirely. For the only thing, record, he's in his late 50s, so he still has a couple of good years left in him before he finally has to retire. If I'm being honest, it's not just the position of the CEO that this is about. It's also the ownership stake as a shareholder and all that jazz, you get what I mean. So I'm not demanding too much. I'm just asking for what I'm old. After thinking about it for the past three days, I finally decided to speak to my parents about it today. I felt bad about what they were going through, but I had to stand my ground, so I went over to their

place in the evening and told them that I was not backing down. My parents seemed very disheartened, and at first my dad didn't even say anything. It was just my mother who was talking again. She told me that I was getting too greedy and that, just because they had made a mistake with their brother once doesn't mean that they were going to do it again. She told me that I needed to trust my family and, that, the fact that I didn't was very disrespectful to them. I was arguing with her, but then she said that I wouldn't even be in this position and get to work in the family business had it not been for my father, who had asked me to help out when Caleb had left initially. She really thought she had me with that one, but obviously not.

I got really annoyed by that comment, and I told her that my dad had asked me to help out because he needed that help from me since he wanted to keep things in the family and have everything hushed up. I had done him a favor back then, not the other way around, and the way she was putting it made it sound otherwise, so I didn't appreciate that. That shut her up, and finally my dad intervened and accepted that he was the one who needed a favor back then, and right now he needed me to do him a favor once more. I could hear that he was literally just a couple of seconds away from crying, so I tried

not to be too hard on him, but I told him very firmly that whatever I had said, I meant it. I explained to him very kindly that I was more than willing to come back to the family business because at the end of the day, in the past three years, I'd had a really good time there. I had developed a close relationship with the employees, but that hadn't been the case with my earlier workplace because it never felt like my own. I had also put a lot of time and effort into rebuilding and restructuring the company after my brother had left, so it's not like it was easy for me to just get up and leave. But at some point, I had to take a stand for myself, and I had to think about my future too. I told him quite frankly that the way he had just announced

that my brother would be taking over after his retirement without even taking my feelings into consideration or even consulting with me was very humiliating, and I just felt betrayed. Naturally, after that, it would be very difficult for me to pretend like everything was fine and just come back like nothing had ever happened. I also for you. I also for that, I also for you. I also finally brought up how, for my entire life, my brother had been their priority and not me. I thought that since we were talking about these things now anyway, it would be better for me to just let it all out at once. So I told them that throughout my life, especially when we were kids, I had always felt sidelined by Caleb because they never gave me enough importance.

When my dad asked Caleb to join the company after he graduated from college but didn't ask me when I did, I knew that his priorities were always going to be different. In fact, even three years ago, the only reason I had joined the family business and fixed everything that Caleb had made go wrong was because one day I hoped to take over. It wasn't a secret that in any other company, I would have to work twice as hard, but this was my dad's company, so I could realistically hope to inherit the business one day. I know it's nepotism and whatever, but it is what it is, and that's why I joined in the first place. Because given how my parents had treated me ever since my childhood,

it was obviously not out of love for my family, and it's about time that they knew that, because you reap what you sow, after all. So now, if they wanted me to trust them again, they had to do what I asked, and if they were not willing to do that, I was done with them. I was polite but firm about what I said, and after I was done talking,

both my parents were just silent for a couple of minutes. My mom was the first to break the silence and tell me that she was really sorry about everything that I had been through, and she had never really thought that they were neglecting me too much. I couldn't tell if she was sincere or not, but it doesn't matter, it's in the past, and I just wanted to talk about the business instead of emotional family matters, so I waited for my dad to say something. Then finally he said that he was also really apologetic for not giving me the kind of attention and affection that I needed as a child.

They acknowledged the fact that they had always treated my brother better than me, and it was quite satisfying in a way because finally it felt like I was getting somewhere with them. At least they were acknowledging the fact that they had made a mistake by raising us both, and that in itself was a huge achievement for me. Anyway, I told them that it did not matter anymore. What mattered now was what they intended to do in the future. Then they went silent for a couple of seconds more, and by then I was getting impatient, so I told them I really needed a decision, and my dad told me that unfortunately he was not ready to retire and hand

over the business to me just yet. He had spent a really long time building this business, and he did acknowledge that whatever he had done to me was wrong and, that, I had every right to demand that I be made CEO, but it didn't seem reasonable right now. However, he was willing to come to a common ground with me if I would be open to that. That sounded quite interesting, and we have decided to speak to our lawyers respectively because what he suggested makes sense. He said that he can have his lawyer draw up the paperwork to sort of have a contract that says that I will be taking over the company once he retires,

and it will include all the important details and stuff. I can have my lawyer go over it, and if it seems acceptable to me, we can go ahead that way. That made sense to me, so that's what we will be doing now. Update 2, hi, so it's been two weeks since my last update, and I've had my lawyer look over the paperwork that my dad sent me, and the terms are fine, so that's what we're going through, and I'm going to get back to work in the company in about a week or so. But that's on the professional front. On the personal front, we still have a lot to deal with. Now that we are still going to be working together, there is a lot that we have to talk about and sort things out. A lot of people in the comments were not happy about the fact that I had decided to go back

to my family, but honestly, at the end of the day, this was a decision that I made. made for my sake, getting revenge and whatever is all great, but this is more practical, to be honest. Besides, I have a son who goes to private school. I cannot just afford to sit back at home for months and wait for a satisfactory job offer to fall into my lap with the same expectations that I could have for my dad's company, or start building something of my own from scratch. My wife works too, but obviously we need two incomes since we have gotten used to a certain lifestyle. I wouldn't say that I've had to swallow my pride to get back to my parents and the company because I did get things done on my terms, and I think from my previous post it was

pretty clear that if they hadn't agreed to my terms, then I would have left. It was as simple as that, and I've not had to compromise on anything, so being a doormat is out of the question, that's just not how I look at it at all. I personally feel that I made the most practical choice, and that's completely fine. Besides, ever since I see that, stood up to my parents the other day at their house, I stood my ground and I told them how badly they had treated me in the past, which is why I don't want to trust them anymore. They have also started being more respectful of me and my boundaries. So I think it's safe to say that slowly but surely, things are changing in our relationship. Even if they don't get completely fixed eventually,

it doesn't matter because my goal was to get to the CEO position, that's it, and as long as I've achieve that, it doesn't matter to me what my parents think. It might sound a bit harsh, but that's the truth. Update 3, hey, so it has been about three months since my last update, and once I got back to work, I got busy again, and I wasn't able to post much here. Anyway, things have been going well at the company. I was absent for a couple of weeks, so I had to explain that, and my dad and I chose to say that I had taken an impromptu vacation. That was the safest option, which wouldn't have led to too many questions. Professionally, my dad and I get along well, and on a more personal front as well, we are trying to work out our problems.

My family and I try to have dinner with my parents every two weeks. Of course, my son loves his grandparents, so that also helps. So far, we haven't exactly spoken about that incident with my brother, but last week both my son and my wife had plans with their friends, so only I have. showed up at dinner with my parents. Then, after a while, we got to talking about my brother, and they confided in me that in the past couple of months, he had made several attempts to reach out to them and ask them for money because he was desperate. But they had made it very clear to him that he was not getting anything out of them. He had dug this hole for himself, he had to get himself out somehow as well. They were not going to enable his behavior anymore,

and I thought that it was pretty good on their part because I'm pretty sure that earlier they would have fallen for his begging easily. My parents told me that obviously it had been very difficult for them to say no to Caleb, and they were very upset about what he was going through because they had always had very high expectations from him, and it made sense because, like I said, he used to be a pretty bright student. I don't know how he got into any of this at all, but anyway, I could tell that they were very upset about it. I felt kind of jealous, so I didn't say anything, but then they told me that even more than that, they regretted the fact that they hadn't given me the same kind of attention growing up, and because of that, I ended up growing away from them, and now they didn't know how to fix it.

They were trying, but it still didn't feel enough. All of a sudden, my mom just broke down and started crying. She started sobbing like a baby while apologizing to me, telling me that she had been a terrible mother and my dad had also failed as a father, and no matter how much they wanted to change the past, they just couldn't. It sucked watching her cry like that. I couldn't help but get a little emotional myself. Usually, I try not to get myself too emotionally invested in my parents because in the past it has always led to heartbreak for me. This time, though, I tried to let myself get a little emotionally vulnerable with them, and I told my parents that what mattered right now was that at least

they were trying to fix the past. They had screwed up, but here I was, willing to give them a second chance, and they were willing to take that chance and at least try to make everything right. In all honesty, there was no telling if we could fix everything in our relationship because it all goes so deep, but the efforts they were putting in right now, that's what counted for me at the moment. Then I told my mom not to cry about it, and I consoled her, and then we went back to having dinner. But even then, the rest of the time that I spent with them was pretty emotional. Before I left, my dad told me that he was really thankful that I was giving them this chance to at least fix things with me because they felt like somehow

they had failed both their kids. I didn't know what to say because, to be honest, it felt kind of true. I guess if my brother had led a more disciplined life and my parents had been a little hard on him, he wouldn't have developed such terrible habits. I'm not saying that it's all their fault, he's an adult and he should have known better too, but they had enabled him, and now he was in a really dark place. But it's all done now, can't do anything about it, and that's what I told my parents as well, that living in the past is not going to be good for anyone. They seemed to understand what I was getting at, and later on, when I came back home, I spoke to my wife about this as well, and she told me that she was glad we were getting along and addressing these things now

because this was at least better than having a strained relationship and pretending that everything was fine. At least we were acknowledging the fact that everything was not fine, and we were actively working on it. Granted, we don't know what's going to happen in the future, but it's the present that counts. It sounds a bit corny, but it's true, and hopefully things with my family will work out in the future because that would make me really happy. I don't want to continue resenting my parents or being suspicious of them forever. I really want things to get better. As long as they're putting the effort that they are right now, I guess I can see that happening.

Anyway, apart from that, I still have my work to think about, and my family is always going to be by my side, so whatever happens, I'll be fine. I hope you enjoy this story. Father's extramarital companion prohibited her child from visiting my grandparents due to their refusal to approve of her, and subsequently voiced her discontent during the evening meal about her offspring receiving unfavorable treatment. The family. So my, 20f, dad is with his affair partner, Lara. He and Lara have a kid, Lucy, 13F. Lucy was conceived after my dad and Lara were already together a while. Her birth wasn't the reason my parents split in case anyone is wondering. But obviously my dad's family knew about the affair once my parents split, and they banned Laura for from ever attending family events.

To this day, the only people on that side of the family that have met her are me and my one cousin who came to stay with me at my dad's for a few days one time. My grandparents told Dad they'd happily be active in Lucy's life, but it would have to be Dad that facilitated the relationship, meaning he'd have to bring her to see them alone. Lara said no. I guess she thought eventually she'd force herself into the family through Lucy,

but all it did was mean no one ever met Lucy. My dad would take me to my grandparents or aunt's place without Lara and Lucy and that was just how it went. Well, it recently came up that my grandparents were giving me money towards buying an apartment when I graduate, which set Laura off. She's always been bitter that my grandparents financed my schooling but my dad paid for university. She's was passive aggressively grumbling at the dinner table that this is why she felt we could have asked them to pay for my university and that it would be nice if Lucy got to have grandparents but some people are petty and cruel. I looked at my dad like, are we really playing that game? But he didn't say anything.

Then Laura turns to Lucy and goes, You should know none of this is your fault. Life isn't fair and you got the short end of the stick with certain family members. So I just said, yeah, the short end of the stick family member is you, Lara. Lucy could have had the same relationship with my grandparents that I do, but you were so selfish that you screwed your own kid out of that. Laura argued that no one who hated her could have a relationship with her daughter, so I was like, well, what are you mad about then? That your principals ended up sabotaging your kid?

Maybe that's on you. At this point my dad was giving me a death stare, so I just went back to my food. Laura sent me a text later that night about how much she didn't appreciate me saying that in front of her child and that it was her prerogative how she managed that relationship. She also said my dad's family are cruel and vindictive. I didn't reply and honestly the only reason I don't have her blocked is in case my dad is taken ill suddenly. But now my dad is saying it's caused issues at home because Lucy is finally grasping that Lara is the one who wouldn't allow her to have a relationship with Dad's side and is now apparently pretty mad about it. He's saying the way I went at Laura was inappropriate in front of a child and that Lucy shouldn't

have heard all that, but I think she only heard it because her mother was reeking reality. I didn't mean to cause an issue between Lucy and Laura but honestly I do. feel like Lara was asking for it by acting like an idiot in front of someone who knew the whole story. Edit, just to clarify one. No, my dad's family didn't immediately forgive him. For a long time they only invited him to things if he brought me during his custody time. But time heals most things. They all still think he's a prick, but honestly I'm sure they thought that before. No, they haven't totally cut him out because we're just not that kind of family. But Lara was never family to start with, so it's way easier to never make her acquaintance than to cut out your blood relative that you've known for 40 years.

I think that's fairly obvious. 2. I am not mad that Lara set the boundary she did, and I'm not mad my parents got divorced. I got mad that Laura set a totally fair boundary, that my dad went along with, not saying he's blameless he's just not the one actively complaining, and then tried to pretend that the consequences of said boundary shouldn't have happened. If you don't want your kid around people who don't like you, understandable, why are you whining that they're not around for your kid? Update, I'm not sure anyone wanted an update, but I like to read post updates so thought I'd drop one. First thing that happened, Lara would not stop texting me. Not like constantly, but once or twice a day about her feelings or demanding a response

slash conversation. This middle-aged woman having a crash out via WhatsApp was not on my bingo card, but eventually I just had to tell her I don't want to block her because I do, want to be there for my dad in an emergency, but I was going to if she didn't stop bothering me. More crash-out material. I called my dad and told him to get his household under control because this was getting crazy. I wasn't going to apologize to her and in my whole life I've never had as much contact with this woman as I had in the past week and I wouldn't allow it to continue. My dad was kind of getting that it was an actual issue now and I pushed him a bit

and the damn broke. So the wider context I was not aware of is that Lucy is only now putting the pieces together of how Dad and Lara got together. She vaguely knew about the affair, but I guess she's finally getting what that means now that she's older and how much damage it did, and she's been asking a lot of hard questions about it and has been really down about it. That's probably why Lara was so triggered by the mention of my grandparents and in a rush to put her spin on it. But since the dinner Lucy has really been raking Lara over the coals for it apparently, because she knows my dad would have let her see the extended family were it not for Lara. My dad also shared that Lara basically feels like she spent a large chunk of her life being punished for the affair

and it's weighing on her because of how hard Lucy is taking it. Side note, a lot of people were rightly roasting my dad for the affair, but if the above should prove anything, it's how much he is definition of a cockroach. The way this man manages to get away with diabolical behavior relatively unscathed is shocking. The second thing that my dad said, and uncharacteristically admitted was a fuck up, was telling Lara that probably part of the reason no one ever eased up on meeting her was because they all knew I can't stand her. And I hold my hands up because I did a lot to bad mouthing Lara back in the day to my grandparents and aunts because, well, I don't like her and when you're a teenager you think that needs to be everyone's problem. I don't think this is as big a reason

they still won't meet her as my dad probably made it seem, but he did admit he threw me under the bus for it ages ago and Lara has never forgotten she thinks me poisoning the well is the whole problem. So that's probably got a lot to do with her complaining at me specifically. My dad did acknowledge that it was a mistake to tell her what was said, and while I wouldn't go around talking bad about Laura now, I don't feel bad about sharing my feelings with my family at the time. I did ask my dad if Lucy was going to be allowed contact with the grandparents, but Laura is still saying no,

but he said she's close to cracking just because of how much of a hard time Lucy is giving her, so he's going to wait it out. In the meantime, I haven't heard from Laura in a couple of days now, which is what I mainly wanted from the situation. I'd quote else to put in this update, if anyone had any lingering questions feel free to ask, but if not, thanks for the advice. Comments where OP has replied,

comment one, sounds like stepmom fucked around and found out. Honestly, don't bother anymore. It's not going to solve anything, just give her more ammunition. But if she continues bothering you, let Laura know that she's just feeling the consequences of her actions, and if she has an issue, provide her a box of tissue and say scram not going to miss you.

Goop. Unfortunately if she keeps bothering me I'm going to have to block her which just feels like such a bad idea in case something ever happened to me, Dad. But hopefully she has realized I have no interest in being involved now. Why is OOP keeping her father and Lara and her life? OOP, Lara is not in my life. Prior to the dinner in the original post, I hadn't seen her in a year and a half, and I never speak to her if I can help it.

My dad is in my life because despite his immeasurable selfishness, he's not all bad. He's tried his best to be a good dad and there's a lot of things I love and appreciate about him. He's not winning any parenting awards but he has always shown up for me, practically and emotionally, and I consider him a net positive addition to my life. Does Lucy own a phone? Can OOP block Lara, but keep open to Lucy? OOP. She's 13. I'm sure she has a phone. I don't have the number, though. TBH in an emergency I don't think

it's appropriate for it to be a child's responsibility to inform family. But if I have to block Lara in the future I'll make you my dad adds me or one of my aunts as an emergency contact so we don't have to rely on Lara comment too. Where is your mom and all this? Is she in contact with your paternal family? Sorry, OOP. I feel bad for Lucy but Laura is a typical cheater entitled behavior. Oh, it's everybody's fault but mine. OOP, my mom is remarried and very happy, ha. She had some contact with my dad's family when I was younger from bringing me around, et cetera, but she hasn't stayed in touch since I was able to make my own plans, etc. How is OOP's relationship with Lucy? Are they close? Ohop, I don't have

a relationship with her honestly. Big age gap. Plus I was rarely at my dad's. can't stand her mother, etc. I don't live locally to them either. But even if I did have a relationship with her, I wouldn't sneak a meeting with my grandparents. I don't think that's appropriate at all. Laura is still the parent. I wouldn't go around undermining her decisions

that wouldn't sit right with me, even if I don't like her. Comment three, your dad is also kind of spineless though, isn't he? He could have put his foot down and demanded Lucy have a relationship with the extended family, but he's Lara's little B, isn't he? OOP, he's not spineless as much as he is committed to doing whatever is best slash easiest for him. He doesn't want to spend the energy fighting with Lara over this because it doesn't benefit him. When he actually wants something, the spine shines up, let me tell you.

Next story, teenage lifeguard at a city beach told me my two-year-old daughter needed to wear a top and bandis from the beach for child Pino-Ruffy concerns, but when I called the city I learned they were just high school kids using the beach to party. Two weeks ago my kids, two-year-old daughter and three-year-old son, went hiking. We followed a path that went very deep into a forest and we came across a little beach type of place. It's really small and there were maybe ten people there. From 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. there is a lifeguard, although he labels himself as security, there since it belongs to the city's regional parks and otherwise it is unsupervised. Obviously we had just come from hiking and I didn't have the kids' swimsuits, so when they asked

me if they could go into the water, I said that I'd see. When we got closer and I saw that it didn't go deeper than my two-year-old stomach for a good six meters, I told myself I'd pull up my pants and go two to three meters in and watch the kids from there. So I agreed to let them in and told them to remove their shirts and pants, to only keep their undies and to jump in, which they gladly did. They were playing in the water for about three minutes when the lifeguard comes by and asks me if my daughter has a top. I told him quickly that this wasn't planned, that her swimsuit does have a top but that I didn't have it with me. He replied something about it not being a nudist or topless beach and that she needed a top, so that maybe I could put her shirt on. I wasn't

entirely sure that he was kidding or not. I mean, he was really young looking, 16 to 18. And he was dressed with baggy shorts and a long t-shirt, definitely not ready to jump in the water if someone drowns, and I don't know. I thought it might have been a joke. So I asked him, really? He said, yes, really. So I got worked up and told him what does my daughter's chest have that my son doesn't. So he said, well, ah, you know. Women have breasts.

To which I replied, yes, women do, once they reach puberty. Right now she's just a little girl with N-Pulse. Everyone has N-Pulse, boy or girl. He looked at me and just said, okay, she cannot stay in the beach like that. At that point I was really pissed, probably to the point where I couldn't even watch them properly in the water, so I told them that we're going to get going. After a bit of but mommy I want to play we got dressed and going. I didn't go back for a while since there is also another beach nearby, but further and

much busier. But then we went hiking yesterday and the kids asked if we could stop by the beach. I mean, this time around I decided to plan ahead and to bring their swimwear, both have shorts and a t-shirt surf style, as well as mine. We got there, the kids had their swimwear on already and they just took off their shoes and socks and jumped into the beach. I was taking off my dress when the same lifeguard came by. He said that he had spoken to his manager and that we weren't allowed on the beach, that they take child pianography very seriously. again, I thought he was kidding. Like, seriously, what the hell? So I told him you better be kidding. And he says, please don't make me call for backup. Now, there were like five people at the beach,

they were all staring and even the kids weren't even in the water and just wondering why Mommy was getting upset. My three-year-old even asked Mommy, do we have to go again? And it just made me feel really upset, and I asked him, in a calming voice, can I please have the number of your manager and his name? He said he didn't have it on him and I told him that I'd go ahead and wait while he called him. So I got undressed and went into the water to watch the kids. What he ended up doing was to call the other security people, three who were also 16 to 18 looking obviously summer jobs, and they told me that I had to leave or that they would have to escort me out of the park. My kiddos didn't need that type of stress, I didn't want to argue, so I politely

asked for the manager's number again, and one of the guys said I am the manager. and I just asked you to leave. So we got dressed and we left. Today, 24 hours later, I am definitely upset. We are in July, it's nice outside, that beach is at 25 minutes from outhouse, it's not busy and yet, I cannot go there for really stupid reasons.

I feel like I cannot reason with them and accept writing to the newspaper or some type of media. I have no other idea what to do. My husband says to just go there after 2 p.m., and we have gone as a family later at night where no one is around, but I think it's completely unfair that we just can't go whenever we please. Has anyone been in this situation that could offer any advice? Should I just let it go and go to the other beach that is 60 minutes away

or try to reason with someone? I obviously don't think I've done anything wrong that got me and the kids banned. I just feel like I pissed off the lifeguard and that he's just getting back at me. Comments where Op has replied, Comment 1. I'd call the beach and ask to speak to the man. and if you get the 16-year-old kid, move up the chain. I'm sure that an 18-year-old is not in charge of the beach.

Boop, that's what I think too. I mean at a certain point there has to be someone else? It's a beach that is inside of a national park. If I look on their website there is no contact information, so. Are they hired by the city? I've been going there for a long time now and never ever came across lifeguards and security, but I've also never had found that beach. Comment two, start by calling the National Park Information Line

and asked to be put in touch with whoever's responsible for their lifeguards or beaches. Edit 1. Kids are napping and I decided to contact the city's council since I really can't find the number of the park's direction. I'm on hold. Edit 2. Okay, I called. I got transferred to this sweet lady who took my call very seriously and who was super professional about it. She was in total disbelieve and just couldn't believe that they would have asked a mom and her two kids to leave because of that. She asked me over and over if I had any alcohol with me,

if my daughter was 20, not two, and if I was topless myself. She also kept apologizing and said, I'm so sorry, this is just crazy, I don't see why it wouldn't be allowed and I don't see why you'd lie. She put me on hold for a good 10 minutes and when she came back she apologized for what had happened. She says that if everything did indeed happen like I say it did, they obviously want to question the security guards about it. That there was absolutely no reason for me to leave. She said that the security guards are actually volunteers who are required by school to volunteer and that they don't actually have any power of asking people to leave or to dress up, so that if I wanted to I could just go back and give them their number, the city's number, or to contact the local

police and ask them to send an officer over non-urgently and not to be bothered by them. She gave me the case number two in case I needed and she promised that she'd call me back to update me after they get a hold of the lifeguards and tell me what was going to happen. She ended the conversation by saying that she was a grandmother of a four-year-old who goes to Beach Topless and never thought of it as offensive. You guys are great by the way. However, I do wish to say that I don't plan on hurting, harming, fighting, yelling and doing any other type of damage to anyone, especially not teenagers. I also don't really plan on suing them or harass them. So while your advice is really appreciated, those are things I just will not do. Update, the lady called back about an hour ago, we actually spoke for a while.

She started by saying how the whole team who worked with her got really upset and concerned about the whole story. She said that there are not a lot of young couples and families in the city and that they've really been trying to attract younger families and to hear something like that happening is just counterproductive. So she apologized again and said they did some quick investigation and found some quite interesting things. Happens that one of her colleagues has a teenager son who knows these guys who went to volunteer at the National Park. They go to high school together and as part of a class, they have to complete 24 hours of volunteer work. Apparently when the mother questioned her son about their volunteering at the beach, he said they don't really volunteer there. They mostly host parties and call it volunteering. Most of 10th graders meet there to drink and smoke. Apparently he had just not told him mom

because he didn't think they were harming anyone. And I mean, let's not forget it, the kid is 16, I probably wouldn't have called them out either. I would think it's just something silly. So, they sent two people who works for the town to check it out at around 1.30 p.m. yesterday and what they saw was crazy. Apparently there was about 15 teenagers there, all drinking, some smoking, some topless, who apparently said they were tanning, and lots of free dogs, which isn't allowed on the whole site. She even added that there was a guy who refused to come out of the water with his girlfriend because they were both naked. It must have been a mess. The lady was telling me that on the phone and I was laughing and she was like, yeah, we laughed too. No shit they didn't want us

there. It was their private little beach of drinking, smoking and fucking. And like I was super curious, got to be friends with the lady, I asked her, okay, what did the two people do? Well, there is only one way to get into the beach, by a little trail after a hike, and there is only one way out. By the famous little trail. So the two town workers sat on the trail, blocking the way and called the cops. The cops came with alcohol tests, asked to see IDs, called parents to come and get their kids at the park's entrance, and apparently gave them tickets for being underage and drinking. The lady also said they are in process of contacting the school to let them know how their volunteering experience worked out and how they were not dedicated to their lifeguard activities.

Well, that explains a lot. They just didn't want us around. And since they have time to see us coming before we get to see them, they probably also had time to hide booze and get dressed. Although maybe it was still too early for them when we went, 10-ish-11-ish. The lady reassured me that they were going to request these volunteers to give me an apology and that today there is already a new volunteer, that she has been told about me and the kiddos and that she cannot wait to meet us. I honestly couldn't be happier. I'm actually typing this and then getting ready to go since it's such a nice day here today. Edit, we went to the beach. The new volunteer is a really sweet teenager named Jessica. She happens to want to be a veterinarian and spent the whole time watching the kids with me and

talking about pets. I hope you enjoy this story. Former spouse took $3,000 from their child's bank account to host a celebration for their stepchild, prompting me to reach out to their partner. The partner reimbursed the funds, and now they are in the process of obtaining a divorce. Presently, the blame game is in full swing. Me for ruining her marriage. My ex-wife, Rita, and I have been divorced for the past eight years. We are also have a 15-year-old daughter together whom we've been co-parenting ever since we got divorced. We haven't had any significant problem so far, but recently, she did something that made me reconsider letting her of custody of our daughter anymore. On top of that, she's also getting

divorced from her new husband and she's blaming me for it, which I really think is unfair. She got remarried about two years ago after being in a relationship with her new husband, Adrian, for almost three years. I haven't met him many. many times, we had a really short interaction at their wedding but from whatever my daughter has told me so far, he seems like a nice guy. The person that my daughter does not get along with is his son. Adrian's son, Derek, is three years older than our daughter and recently graduated high school. I've not met that kid many times either, but my daughter has told me that he is really arrogant and a bit of a bully at times, so she just mostly steers clear of him because they don't get along.

Even Rita knows that our daughter doesn't like him, so I guess it was especially cruel for her to steal our daughter's savings so she could throw a party for her stepson. Derek recently graduated high school but his father was not happy with his grades because he had managed to just somehow scrape by and the chances of him getting into even a half-decent college were really slim. He doesn't really feel sorry about it, even though his counselor had told him a lot of times that he needed to step up and start doing better if he wanted to get into his choice of college. He hadn't taken any of that seriously, and now, he and his father were on really bad terms because his dad thought that he was wasting his time and so, he did not want to celebrate his son's graduation. I don't want to comment on whether that's right or wrong because that's their personal thing, but I do feel that if his biological father had said that he did not want his son's graduation to be celebrated, Rita should have taken that into consideration and not gone out of her way to throw a party for him, knowing that her husband wouldn't like it. After all, she has only known Derek for a couple of years, and Adrian has been raising him his entire life. I think Adrian would know better.

But anyway, she chose to throw a party for him and since she couldn't exactly ask Adrian for money because then he would find out that she was hosting a party for him, she decided to steal from our daughter. My daughter has a joint account with us and has her own card too and both her mother and I occasionally deposit some money in her account for her future. She has also been saving up on her own and working part-time jobs since last year because she wants to buy a nice car for herself on her 18th birthday and I think with a little help from us, she'll definitely be able to do it. And Rita knows all this, which is really infuriating. Anyway, a couple of days ago, Rita took the card without telling our daughter while she had been napping and used it to make all the purchases for the party.

She ended up spending almost three grand on the party and now, my daughter's just left with around. $200. It's incredibly unfair because not only had she been working for this money, but she had also put aside every check that she received as gifts and it was her own money. So Rita had no right to do that to her. And naturally, when our daughter found out about it, she was very upset. It didn't take her long to discover what her mother had done and the very next day, after she found out, she decided to confront Rita. That was a day before the party and Rita told my daughter to cut out the drama because the party was going to be hosted, whether she liked it or not. And she said that all the money that our daughter had was because of the two of us anyway,

so none of it was her own. That was simply not true because I think I've already mentioned that our daughter had been working to get that money. So not only was that unfair, but it was also unfair for Rita to claim that she wouldn't have that money if it had not been for us. On top of that, she decided to tell our daughter that this money was going towards her brother's party fund and that was something that she should be happy about instead of acting like a brat because she's going to be there at the party too. She tried to make it sound like Derek was a bigger victim than her because his father had refused to contribute to throwing a party for him, even though it was a big deal that he had graduated high school. She just wanted to do something nice for her

stepson, so she expected our daughter to be happy about that as well because after all, they were a family and she should be happy to make little sacrifices for her family. It was all nonsense and I could tell that Rita was reaching to make it sound like she hadn't done anything wrong and downplay the seriousness of what had happened. Luckily, our daughter did not fall for her act, and even though it was her mother's turn to stay with her, she decided to pack up her stuff and come back to me. She's been here for a couple of days and has simply refused to go back to staying with her mom for the rest of the month and has even been telling me that she doesn't even want to go back

next month because she feels betrayed and rightfully so. The only thing that she wants is her money back and so do I, so I've been trying to reason with Rita for the past couple of days. The party has already happened and she keeps telling me that the money didn't belong to our daughter anyway, so she needs to stop making a fuss about it and has told me that she's not going to be returning the money. I find it really unreasonable and I have called her out on her behavior because I think she's being stingy. She has a nice job and makes a decent amount of money, so she could totally afford to throw that party by herself, and her defense for that is that she's been trying to save up money for our daughter's future so she can go to college without working her way through it like we did or taking out a student loan. So ultimately, what she did is not that bad, considering how she's planning to make up for it.

I don't understand the logic behind it and neither do I want to because I think it's a bunch of bologna. Anyway, we have been fighting over it a lot and I've told her that I want the money back, by hook or by crook. But she has been straight up refusing to pay our daughter back and has been making up excuses about it. It had been really frustrating and so, yesterday, with no other option left, I decided to contact Adrian to talk to him about it. By then, it had become quite obvious that talking to Rita was not going to take me anywhere and she was bent on not returning the money. And since the money had technically been spent on Derek and his party, I decided to talk to his father about it. I didn't have his number, so I sent him a message on Facebook and explained the entire situation to him.

I told him that I was really sorry to be doing this, but my daughter is very upset and I think it's unfair. I ended the message by telling him that it would be really great if he would be able to convince Rita to pay back the money or make some arrangements himself. I was polite enough, and I received a reply within hours, it was him apologizing for the entire situation and telling me that he had no idea that this was how Rita had afforded to pay for the party. He told me that he would send me the money right away and I sent him my details, he transferred me the money almost immediately. And finally, there was a solution to all of this and both my daughter and I were pretty content with how the situation had finally turned out. She was obviously still very upset with her mother and so was I, so we had made up our mind that we wouldn't speak to her until she apologized.

But I hardly think that's likely to happen anymore because this morning, she showed up at my house and started screaming at both. of us, accusing us of ruining her marriage. Apparently, after I had sent that message to Adrian last evening, he had come back home from work and picked up a huge fight with her. He had already been quite unhappy about the fact that she had decided to throw a party for Derek in the first place because that was not what he wanted. He did not think that his son deserved a party because his grades and behavior had been disappointing and in spite of that, Rita had gone against what he had said and thrown that party for him. And now, on top of that, he had to find out for me that she hadn't even used her own money to fund that party,

she had stolen from her daughter, and in his eyes, that was unforgivable. He also believes that it was humiliating for him as well and now, he wants a divorce. I don't know how any of this is my fault because I personally feel like she had brought this all onto herself with her unreasonable behavior. I was already pretty upset that she was yelling at me and accusing me of running her marriage, but the fact that she was even acting that way towards our own daughter, especially after how she had treated her for the past couple of days, was unacceptable for me.

So I asked our daughter to go back inside because she had no reason to be dealing with this nonsense. And then, I stood my ground, and I told Rita that whatever was happening to her right now, it was her own fault and she had no right to barge into our home and start screaming at us like this. That made her even more upset and she started cursing me out and told me that she knew that I wasn't happy about the fact that she had found somebody again and was in a loving relationship with her husband and that I was just doing all this to ruin her marriage because I was jealous of her happiness. I literally ended up rolling my eyes at that because we had been divorced for a really long time and I couldn't care less what she was up to.

In fact, I had even attended her wedding as a guest and was happy for her because we had been on good terms so far. So all these accusations and things that she was saying were baseless and after a while, I started getting really irritated, so I told her that I wanted her to leave because she was not about to gaslight us into believing that any of this was our fault. When I asked her to leave, she didn't go away and instead, she told me that she was not going anywhere until I called her husband up. I told her that everything had been a huge misunderstanding and Rita hadn't done anything wrong. Obviously I refused to do that and I told her that she was crazy, but that made her start acting even crazier and she started stomping all around the

room and telling me that she was not going anywhere until I fixed what I had damaged. She was screaming at me all this while, cursing relentlessly and just acting like a total psycho. To be honest, I started feeling really uncomfortable after a while because there was clearly something wrong with her. I kept asking her to leave and then eventually, I had to tell her that if she did not go away, I would call the cops because I really couldn't think of any other way to deal with it. At that point, she started sobbing uncontrollably and fell to the floor and told me that this was

all my fault and now, I was threatening her with the cops as if she was the bad guy. The whole thing was so bizarre, she was acting so unstable that I couldn't even make sense of it. Eventually, she started mumbling about how her biggest mistake had been marrying me and then having a daughter with me, and now, she was stuck with both of us in her life and we were ruining everything for her. And I could handle everything as long as she was just keeping it directed towards me, but the second that she dragged our daughter into it, I lost it. I snapped at her and told her that there was no need for her to worry about me and her daughter being a part of her life anymore because soon enough, I'll be speaking to my lawyer and filing for full custody of our daughter,

and given the current circumstances, I'm sure our daughter won't mind either, and neither will she. Then, she started wailing at the top of her lungs and started telling me that I was a horrible person, I was ruining her life, and that she didn't deserve any of this. But by then, I was in a terrible mood, and I had lost all sympathy for her. I did not even care that she seemed to be in a terrible mental state, I just told her that after everything that she had done, she deserved everything that she was going through right now. So Adrian was definitely doing the right thing by leaving her and soon enough, we would be gone from her life too. She tried to start crying some more, probably for sympathy, but I just

grabbed her by the arm and lifted her to her feet, and then I threw her out of my house. It was a little rough, but I had to do it. And now, she's texting me nonstop about how she's going through a lot already and I should have been respectful and understanding instead of acting the way that I did. I'm just really confused, Ida for telling my ex-wife that she deserves to be left by her husband and throwing her out of my house. Update 1, hey, thank you for all the comments and I have now decided that I need to block Rita so she can't bother me anymore. The past couple of days have been really stressful for me and given her behavior in the recent

past, I think it would be in all our best interest for me to file for full custody of our daughter. I've even spoken to my daughter about it, and she feels the same way so I've reached out to my lawyer. Our daughter has told me that it wasn't just me that Rita was bothering. with her endless messages about how we should have been kinder to her given everything that she was going through, she had been sending the exact same messages to her daughter as well. I don't know how she feels entitled to kindness from us when she has been so unkind to our daughter recently. Anyway, both of us have blocked her, and we are going to try and keep her out of our lives now. To be honest, her behavior when she came over the other day had been really unstable and scary and I really don't think that I want anything to do with her anymore. I'm pretty sure that there's something wrong with her and I can't put my finger on it, but I'm sure that there's something going on with her. Whatever is going on with her, it doesn't concern me personally, but since our daughter is legally supposed to spend half the month with her due

to our custody arrangement, it does concern me because of that. I know she's not going to be happy about the fact that I'm filing for full custody and she's probably going to try and throw a tantrum to get me to change my mind, but I'm not doing that. So far, we have mostly been on good terms, and even though we have had our disagreements, we have managed to work through them. Recently though, I just don't know what's gotten into her, and the fact that even Adrian has decided to leave her, it speaks volumes about how insufferable she has been lately. I had been a little doubtful about whether I was doing the right thing by filing for full custody, but after reading through the comments, I think I need to do it.

Because stealing money from our own daughter, that's just crazy. It wasn't like a spur of the moment decision, I'm pretty sure of that. She had time to think it through because our daughter has spending limits set on her account and I'm sure that Rita had to make some calls to modify that before she could use the card. And now that I think about it, I don't know the code to use my daughter's card either so I'm guessing that even Rita had no idea and she had to go through our daughter's diary or something, because I know that's how she always keeps track of all her passwords and stuff. So this couldn't have possibly been a decision that she made without thinking it through and that's

the scary part of it. Update 2, so I recently spoke to my lawyer and we filed for full custody a couple of days ago. I don't think she has been served yet though, because then, she would probably be at my door again. Anyway, I'm already dreading that so I don't want to talk about it. I do, however, want to talk about what I found out from Adrian today. He decided to pay us a visit in the evening, and I thought it was really strange because it was not like we were friends, we hadn't even interacted that much. And now that he's getting divorced from Rita, we wouldn't have anything to talk about anyway. I figured that there must have been something very important that he had to discuss with me if he had showed up in person to talk to me, and so, we got to talking

and that's how I found out that Rita had recently been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It had been a couple of months, even though her behavior had been very strange for a while now. That's why he had decided that she needed to speak to a professional a couple of months ago and that's how she had been diagnosed. Obviously, that was not great, but it did explain her very strange behavior recently. She had been acting quite irrationally and she was clearly unstable, and after speaking to her therapist, Adrian found out that she had refused to take any medication and she had also been quite irregular with her sessions. Her therapist had tried to contact him several times to inform him because he was the one who had requested. did to be kept in the loop, but she did not want him to find out.

Rita had even blocked her therapist's number from his phone. This was all really shocking, but it got worse when he told me that the party that she had thrown for Derek had mostly been because Derek had found out that she had been acting like a kleptomaniac and stealing stuff from pretty much everywhere. One time, she hadn't even been caught shoplifting while she was with him, but, thankfully, Derek went to school with the store manager's son and had somehow managed to get her free. He had been holding that against her, and that's why she had decided to throw him that party in Adrian had only found out about all of it recently. And he had found out about it from Derek because Rita had refused to speak up about it.

His son had come and told him about it because he felt pretty guilty about everything that was going on and had confessed that he had been the one forcing her to throw a party for him, but he had no idea that this would have such dire consequences. So I'm guessing that's why Rita had chosen to steal the money from our daughter, instead of just paying for if. herself, probably for the thrill of it or something. I don't know what her reasons were but one thing has been established and that's the fact that Rita is not stable right now and she has no business being around our daughter. Adrian told me that because we have shared custody of our daughter, he felt like it was important for him to mention all these things to me. He also ended up telling me that he felt incredibly guilty about the fact that he was leaving her while she was in such a bad state, but he had no other option because this was starting to affect his son now.

His son had always been a bit disturbed, ever since he lost his mother nine years ago, and even though he had been very attached to her, and everyone loved her, she had also had severe depression after her cancer diagnosis, and he didn't want something like that to happen to his son again. He couldn't afford to have that happen again, and that's why he was leaving, and I reassured him that he was doing the right thing for his child because that's what's most important. As for Rita, I know that she has her parents and the rest of her family and they'll take care of her, but our kids only have us and we should always prioritize them.

After we had that little chat, both of us felt considerably better about everything, and then he left. He told me that he had already filed for divorce, and when I told him that I had filed for custody as well, we were a bit worried about how Rita was going to take it, but then, it's not like we had any other options and we had already done what had to be done, so there was no looking back. I do kind of feel bad for her because it's all going to happen at once,

and it's definitely going to be very difficult for her to handle it all, but I'm just hoping that her parents are there for her and are able to handle her emotions, which I know for a fact are going to be all over the place once she finds out that I'm going to keep our daughter with me until I deem her fit to be a mother again. I don't mean to sound overly righteous about myself, but honestly, right now she should just focus on getting better for her own sake, and I truly hope that she does get better soon and I really mean that from the bottom of my heart. Update 3, hey, so Rita's mother called me today and told me that she had been served with

the papers earlier, and she has been devastated ever since. Even my ex-mother-in-law was crying on the phone while she's speaking to me and I felt terrible for her because I knew it couldn't be easy for her to deal with Rita right now, given everything that she was going through, but I tried to do my best to explain to her that I really had to do this. I wasn't sure if Rita had told her everything about the reason why she was getting a divorce and also why I was demanding full custody, so I narrated the entire incident to her, and I told her everything that I knew, including everything that Adrian had recently told me. And I explained to my mother-in-law that after all this, she couldn't possibly expect me to not want to keep my daughter with me.

I thought that she would be surprised by all that information because I was certain that Rita must have left a lot of important details out to make her look like the good guy, but to my surprise, she had confessed everything to her parents, and they knew that she had been wrong everywhere. They told me that they had been aware of the fact that she had developed bipolar disorder recently and had even started stealing. She had been telling them about it herself for the last couple of months and it's not like she didn't feel bad about it herself, she felt terrible, but she just couldn't. bring herself to stop and she needed help. Not only help from the professionals, but she also needed people to be there for her and support her through all of this emotionally. But instead, we were running away from her, and she thought that as her mother, it was simply not acceptable that we were treating her daughter like this. She told me that she herself, even more than Rita, felt betrayed, and told us that it was really cruel of us. For a second, I was really annoyed that

she was trying to make it seem like Rita was the victim here even though we were also the victims of her behavior. But then I decided to calm down for a second and think about it from her perspective. Of course, being a parent, I would also feel bad for my kid if they were going through something like this, and people started leaving her alone. I have a daughter, and I know how she felt and that's why I told her that I could understand what she was going through, maybe not fully, but at least I could try. But even then, I told her that I couldn't change my mind about what I was about to do because I'm sure that even if she had been in my place, she wouldn't have changed her mind either and would have looked out for her daughter like

she was doing right now. That seemed to get her to think about it and then, she didn't say anything, just abruptly hung up the phone and that was it. I don't know what to make of that, but I'm just hoping that things go well for everyone after this. Update 4. So it's been almost a year since my last update and I've been really busy with everything, so I didn't have the time to post anything. Anyway, Rita ended up getting divorced, and even though she put up a good fight, she lost custody of our daughter because my daughter wanted to stay with me. However, we did not end things on a bitter note, she ended up apologizing to me, and to our daughter after she lost custody and told us that she would definitely try and get better, for our daughter's sake. It was really emotional

and we promised to keep in touch because a couple of weeks after that, she told us that she was leaving the city and moving out of state to start afresh and leave everything behind her. Maybe this would help her out and she also promised us that she would be regularly attending therapy sessions and taking her medication. So we have been in touch for the past couple of months, ever since she moved away, and she's been trying to make it up to our daughter by sending her handmade gifts every alternate weekend. It's a new hobby and it's good for both of them, so that's nice.

A lot of things have changed for me as well because a couple of months ago, I met a woman at work and right now, we're going quite strong. She also has a daughter who is a couple of years younger than my daughter and we have introduced them to each other and they've become the best of friends. Even though we have been together for just around seven months, my girlfriend and I have a really strong connection and I'm planning on getting married in a year or two. We have decided that we are going to move together by the end of the year and I'm really excited about what the few. is about to bring. I'm content with life right now, I'm doing well, my personal life is great and most importantly, my daughter is also doing well. Hopefully, she'll be able to reconcile with her mother fully once again and I hope that day comes soon. But for now, everything is great and that's all that I have to say. Thank you guys for all the lovely and supportive comments and

messages I received and if you guys are reading this, thank you for checking up on us. It really means a lot to me, so thanks. I hope you enjoy this story. Guardians compelled me to labor from the age of 13 in order to demonstrate my value, all the while pampering my sister who was separated. Subsequently, they insisted that I relinquish all my funds to cover the expenses of her elective surgery. So I called my grandfather who cut them out of his $300,000 inheritance. I, 18M, come from a weirdly patriarchal family. They are more problematic than they are patriarchal because all my life, I have had to face the music for being a boy, whereas my elder sister, 25F, has been pampered with a lot of love and attention because she's

the eldest and because she's a girl. I cannot stand her, and she doesn't bother about me. It has always been this way, and I think this is how it is going to be forever. I don't have any qualms about it, though. She is insufferable, and there is a reason that she doesn't have a single friend. No one other than my parents can even stand her for more than six months. The maximum time she has ever had one person, either a friend or a boyfriend, stick it out with her has been six months. And I don't blame them. With grace, even that is an achievement.

And she is so thick that she doesn't even understand that the problem is with her. She has been made to feel all her life that she can do no wrong, and everyone else is basically against her, and she has the right to cut anyone off who doesn't treat her like a queen. Well, too bad, the real world doesn't work this way. All this entitlement comes from the enabling behavior of our parents, who think no end of grace, to the point that there are days when Kelsey, F-14, my younger sister, and I feel that they only wanted one child, and we are just there for decoration.

But I am glad I have Kelsey with me. I love her more than I love anyone else in the world, and I want her to get out of this hellhole as soon as possible, especially because they encourage Grace's behavior and want Kelsey to copy her, and I know that if she ends up like Grace, she isn't going to be able to do anything in life. She is too young to be turned into a prop, and I will not let that happen to her.

It's a relief that her personality is completely opposite to that of Grace's, so she naturally doesn't have the propensity to behave like the queen of the house. I know it is only me who can protect her from the rest of her. ridiculous and dated beliefs that my family has about everything. Ever since I was a kid, I had been taught that I was the man of the house and that I had to take up dad's business as an adult. It was hammered into me early on that being a man meant having endless responsibilities, being serious all the time, and earning money and providing for the family. That's what the men in my family did. I never knew any better, so that is

what I inculcated within me. However, the push to start earning my own money came early on. My father said that he was not going to offer me any sort of opportunities on a platter, and only if I could prove that I was worthy of his help, in the sense of financial aid for college, etc., would he be willing to shell out money for me? I had to prove my worth as a man to him. And all this when I was just a kid. I remember I was given this lecture before my 11th birthday when I had asked my dad if I could have my friends over for a party. He said that I was transforming into a young man and now I had to become aware of the responsibilities of the world and give up this childishness. I wish I hadn't listened to him, but at that point in time, I did not know better.

I picked up a job when I was 13. It wasn't much, but I liked what I did. I used to walk the dogs of the families in the neighborhood initially, and then, I started dog sitting as well. I have always loved animals and because I started very young, I picked up the skills, knack, and most importantly, the patients for a job like this. It wasn't much, but it gave me money, some of which I spent, and most of which I saved. My parents were proud of me, and that made me proud of myself. They never asked me what I did with that money, they never asked me how much I made. They just tried to ensure that I wasn't spending the money on dangerous things like alcohol and drugs.

They used to check my room for the same regularly, but they never found anything, because I didn't have those habits. I used to stash my money and save it, and I had decided that I would be saving it all up and using it for college. I was naive back then. I thought that all this money would have been enough for college, when it clearly wasn't. Moreover, I was also quite sure that my father wouldn't be spending a dime on my education, especially since he had already told me that the only way that I could get financial assistance from him was if and only if I showed him that I was worthy of it. The thing with indoctrination of this kind is that I never felt worthy of dad's money. I still don't. And this experience is completely opposite to what Grace lives on a

daily basis. She has had none of these struggles. The only thing that has ever been asked of her has been to look pretty and to make sure that she marries well. Those are the only two things that have ever been required of her. And this was driven home to her since she was young, I guess, I never remember her even trying to do well in school or get into hobbies that aren't about makeup or dressing up. I still remember when I was not even ten, we had to go out to Dad's friend's place, and Grace was running a temperature at that point. She wasn't dressed up, and my parents were aghast.

To them, a normal grace was much worse than a sick grace. She asked them to let her sit the party out because she wasn't feeling well anyway, but they forced her to go and said that we would only be there for a while. I think she might have had it bad, too, with them, but that just made her insufferable instead of a decent enough person. They've tried to put Kelsey through the same shit, too, but I have been trying my hardest to not let her fall for this. Plus, with all of Grace's drama every other week, they are very occupied with her to bother much about us. The issue happened a few weeks ago, and I had never thought that it would blow up into something so major. I am not complaining, because I finally feel vindicated after all these years, but it just

feels weird having the family at each other's throats. It started because I got into one of the best universities in my state for undergrad, and I was quite proud of myself. I also got a full scholarship, so there was no issue of financial aid. Mom and Dad are proud of me, too, and Dad said that I had worked very hard and that he was proud of me. I rarely get to hear these words, so they mean a lot to me. However, what he said next just blew me out of my mind completely. He said that since I had a scholarship, I could work and pay for the living costs. I was kind of bummed because I had been working ever since I was

13, only because I thought that maybe Dad would help me out when the time came because I had shown him that I was responsible. I had been hoping that at least my late teens would be enjoyable because I had spent every other part of my teen slaving away either at school or working. He said that he had been trying to train me for the trials of life ever since I was a boy. There were no trials, I could have had a very comfortable life. I was sullen for a while but I decided to talk to Dad about the situation. I was hoping he would understand, and even if he didn't, the worst that could happen was that he would scream at me. It didn't matter. I needed rest, I needed a break,

and I needed a life. I went to Dad and told him that I had been working ever since I was a kid, and only because he had promised me that he would help me out with college if I showed him that I could be responsible with money and that I was worth all the effort and investment. I told him that I didn't know how else one could prove his worth and that I had tried my best all these years. I told him that I was tired of working, and I wanted to have a good experience in college, and I said that I wanted him to help me with living costs. I had quite a good sum saved because of all those years of working, but I told him that that wouldn't be enough for all my expenses, which is why I needed his help. He just sighed and he looked defeated. He said that he

knew where I was coming from, but that he couldn't do much right now because Grace was going through a lot. I lost it. I told him that Grace was always going through a lot. He had always preferred her over me. He had paid for all those exorbitant clothes and makeup for her, he had funded both her weddings out of his pocket, and all for what, for her to be dumped by her husbands because she was an idiotic ass and she had no personality other than being a stupid Barbie doll. Dad looked exasperated and said that there was nothing that he could do other than help her out because she was in a very bad place right now. The bad place is that she has had two divorces already.

Her first husband was Dad's friend's son, Luke. He was a couple of years older than her. They got married when she was 20 and he was 28, and he was 28, and he was. and he was done with her within a year. I don't know the details of the divorce. I was very young, and I was gladly kept out of it. All I knew is that Dad and that friend of his are still on good terms, but Dad has been kind of pissed with Grace ever since.

She got married again two years ago, and this guy nobody in the family liked. His name is Andrew, Andy, and he just gives everyone the ick. I don't know what she saw in him other than his money, because he is loaded. That part is true. But he is just weird and disgusting. So much so that even my parents don't like him, and that is a surprise because they like everyone with money. Things went south in that marriage as well. He was a serial cheater.

He knew he could get away with it because Grace was crazy about the money and the luxury, so he knew how to shut her up. Mom and Dad had never liked him anyway, and they tried to get her to leave him, but she never listened to them. She said that she could not bear another failed marriage and that she would stay in it and make it work, no matter what it took. Well, what it took was another woman that he knocked up and left Grace for. So she came back home. That was a year ago, and she has been home ever since. It has been horrible for me, and especially for Kelsey.

Now that my parents have realized that their project has failed, and Grace couldn't do what they wanted her to, they have now started eyeing Kelsey. They try to get her to listen to them, but I have done my part well. I have trained her into not getting manipulated by them because I know their tactics. Grace, for her part, is miserable, and in all honesty, I don't really want to bring her out of her misery. I know being divorced twice by the age of 25 is a lot for anyone to take, but I cannot make myself feel bad for her. I just can't. I have never liked her, and I don't think I ever will. Anyway, so Dad told me that at this point in time, his focus was grace because she had had

two failed marriages already, and he had to do something about her. Which is why all the focus was going to be on her, yet again, and in hindsight, I don't even know why I was surprised, and that I needed to be understanding of the entire situation. I had wanted to scream at him then, but I thought it was just futile. And then he said something that just made all that simmering rage inside me burst to the surface. He told me that since I knew how bad things were for grace and because I had a full ride to university, so I was practically sorted, he wanted me to give all the money that I had earned to him so that he could use it for grace. And use it for what? For cosmetic surgeries because she felt her husbands were leaving her because she wasn't pretty enough.

I have never heard a proposition that was more ridiculous than this. I have never felt so much anger ever before. I would have slapped my father that day, honestly, I don't know how I didn't. I started screaming. I don't remember what I said, but I knew it wasn't sweet or nice. It was nasty. I was spewing shit verbally the entire damn time because I just couldn't believe his audacity.

I told him that I had ruined my entire childhood because of him and his stupid notions, and that was why he had failed both Grace and me. I told him that Grace was an unemployable little piece of shit because they never let her develop any personality or hobbies other than being beautiful and having a husband. Which is why they were now feeling guilty for the way her life was, and they would pander to any and every whim and fancy of hers because that was the only way that they could feel less guilty. I told him that there was no way I was letting him touch even a penny of my money, especially for Grace's glow-ups. He was surprisingly calm and told me that he understood my frustration, but that now was the time for me to stand by my family and do the right thing. I told him that I had been led by example, and if he had never

done the right thing by me, I don't know how he could have expected me to do the right thing. I had never seen that happening in my life and my family. I had only seen favoritism and partiality, and if he wanted me to let go of all that just like that, that wasn't going to happen. I told him that I was a fool to expect him to help me out, and similarly, he was a fool for believing that I would be giving any money for grace. I then simply stormed out of the room and broke down. Was so, so frustrated. Logically, I knew that if I did end up taking a job, I would be able to survive, and well, in college. But to hell with logic. I was just broken at that point. I think the fact that no matter what I did, no matter what I achieved or how I behaved, I was never going to be worthy enough for my family finally hit home.

There were two children in the house. One was a young woman who never did well in school, got married twice, and then got divorced twice. She never had to lift a finger or want for anything. And she had to do just one thing, according to my parents, stay married. She couldn't even do that. On the other hand, there was me. I don't even remember the last time I was stress-free, or the last time I was truly happy. I was always either studying, working, or on the lookout for work.

More than the money, it was to prove to my parents, and especially my dad, that I was a good kid, and that I am doing what you want me to, so just love me in return. But that didn't happen, and I now know that it's never going to happen. Grace is their favorite, and nothing on earth can change that. So I knew that I had to do something, and fast, to be able to save both myself and Kelsey. I didn't know who to go to or who to talk to. I knew that talking to my uncles would be of no use because they would only sympathize with me. And even if they tried to talk to Dad, Dad would just rebuff them, and it would all end up falling on me.

The only people who could talk sense into my dad, and who Dad lived in my dad lived. listened to, were my grandparents. I knew that they were the only ones who could put an end to this crap. And by this point, I didn't even want Dad's money, I had reconciled myself to the fact that I would ultimately have to end up doing everything on my own and fund my way through college. Now I was out for blood. Now I wanted the world to know what really happened behind these closed doors and show the world who my father really was. Little did I know that one call to my grandfather and things would become so different. Had I known the kind of influence Grandpa had over Dad, I would have called him years ago to put an end to this shit. I called Grandpa and told him everything. I didn't

leave out a single detail, not the part where I worked only because I wanted to prove myself to my parents. Apparently, they had told everyone that I was working because I wanted to, and they had tried to stop me from doing so many times, but I was adamant and never listened. I told him about the scholarship and dad's refusal to help me out financially, and finally, I told him about the cosmetic surgeries that Grace is planning, and that dad is wanting me to fund. It was a long and hard call, and I had a feeling that Grandpa had not understood quite a bit of it. He told me to calm down and that he wanted to meet me and discuss it in person with me. I agreed. We met at his place the next day, he lives an hour away, and I repeated everything. He didn't interrupt me and

didn't say much. By the time I was done, he just asked me what I wanted, and I said that I was not sure, but that I was sick of the bias and the neglect. He told me that I had nothing to worry about and that he would take care of everything. This was last week, and nothing has happened as yet. Dad keeps trying to pressure me into giving my money, and now he has involved Mom as well. Mawn straight up emotionally blackmails me, but I am not going to relent. I know grandpa is going to show up and I know he is going to blast the daylights out of Dad. I trust him. But now, I just cannot wait for it to happen. I need my vengeance, and I need my justice. Update 1, guys, the blow-up happened, and it was much worse, or rather better, than I had

expected. I had honestly never thought that it would circle back like this, but hey, I'm not complaining in the slightest. Grandparents came and called the family together. Dad thought this was just one of those regular meetings where we will have lunch and then be on our merry way. Boy, he was wrong. It started with Grandpa asking Dad what he was planning for Grace. Mom mumbled something, but Dad said that she wanted to enroll in a college and that they were contemplating what was best for her. Everyone knew that was a lie, but Grandpa was in no mood to play. He straight up asked Grace what courses and colleges she was looking at, but she had nothing to say. She stared blankly at everyone, and it caused so much embarrassment. L.O.L. Dad was completely red in the face.

Then Grandpa turned to me and asked me what my plans were for college. I told him that I had a full scholarship, but I didn't have any help for living costs. He looked at Dad and made a face. Dad pretended not to see it. That's when Grandma came in. She asked Dad how much he was going to give me, not if he was going to give me money, but only how much. Dad said that we hadn't discussed it yet. That's when I said that actually we had discussed it, and he had completely refused to help me out.

Grace kicked me from below the table, but I didn't care. This was coming out. Dad started laughing nervously, saying that it was just silly banter between father and son, and my mother was glaring at me. If looks could kill, I would have been six feet under the ground, being eaten by insects right now. I retorted that it did not look like banner to me, and I had even been asked to give up all my savings to fund Grace's cosmetic procedures. Grandpa banged his hand on the table and asked Dad if it was true. I think Dad was too stunned to lie, and he immediately said yes.

The entire room was quiet, and Grandpa, bless his heart, gave a lingering look to every single person present there. He has a pension for the Dramatics, and it worked beautifully. He asked, asked Dad why he was behaving that way, but Dad didn't have an answer. He then turned to mom and asked her how she was okay with this partiality, but she didn't have anything to say either. He then got up and said that since the parents in this situation were choosing to stay quiet, he had no option but to take things into his own hands. He said that he had set aside a $300,000 inheritance for the three of us, which he had wanted to divide equally among the three of us. But he said that since my parents focusing all of their energies and money on grace,

and not on Kelsey or me, he was forced to rethink this division. He said that he would be leaving $30,000 for grace, and the remaining $270,000 would be divided equally among Kelsey and me. My jaw dropped. $135,000 is a lot of money. It's insane money. I had never wanted this. Like I had never told my grandpa that I wanted him to give me more money, so I don't know why he made this decision. But when he said this, all hell broke loose. Grace started yelling, saying that she never knew that there was so much money that she could use and that it was unfair that she was getting peanuts whereas Kelsey and I were getting so much. Grandpa told her that all her life, she had been getting so much, and Kelsey and I were getting peanuts, but she didn't protest then. Dad tried to chime in, saying that this wasn't fair and grandpa was discriminating between his grandchildren.

But Grandma promptly said that they weren't discriminating, they were just being fair. It was Mom and Dad who had started the discrimination, and they were just trying to make things better and easier for the two other kids that Mom and Dad treated like crap. She also said that none of this would have happened had they been good parents and had they known that this is not how one lives in a family. Dad said that there was no need to punish Grace for a crime that she didn't commit, and that she should have her share. Grandpa got wild. By then, he was still a little civil. But I think the fact that Dad just kept on defending himself and Grace and not saying sorry triggered Grandpa to no end. He said that actually, Dad was right, and I could hear Grace breathe a sigh of relief beside me. He said that the real culprits were Mom and Dad, and Poor Old Grace was not. not to blame. So he said that the inheritance die for Dad was now also going to go to Kelsey and me.

I could see all the colors drain from Dad's face. It was evident that Dad hadn't thought this through, but too bad for him because Grandpa had. Dad quietly said that Grandpa couldn't do it, and he just said, watch me. It was a dead-ass Chad move, and honestly, that man has my respect. He said that he had nothing more to say and that he would be taking our leave. He also warned Dad to not hound either Kelsey or me because we were not to blame in any way. He had done what he thought was right, and if Dad tried to manipulate or harass us, Grandpa said that he could go a lot lower. I think Dad is really scared because he hasn't said a single word to us ever since Grandpa left. Kelsey is a kid, and she doesn't understand much of whatever

happened, but I know that Dad is petrified that Grandpa is going to follow through. Mom has been trying to to me, but I just avoid her like I've done all my childhood. Now I'm suddenly the hot thing of the family, and everyone is sucking up to me, even Grace. I told her to piss off because she was the last person I wanted to talk to. I am just so glad that Grandpa has cut them off, and now they're finally going to face the consequences of their actions. As for me, that's a lot of money, and I know I'm going to be set for life with that kind of a head start.

As of now, I don't have to worry about college, and I don't have to worry about after college either. Update 2, this is just a small update. I have left for college. Leaving home was bittersweet. Kelsey hugged me and cried, and I cried too. I know it's going to be very difficult for her, and I know that my parents are going to try and manipulate her.

I have told her to tell me everything that happens in the house, and she has promised me that she will. I can only hope I can do enough to save her and not let her get brainwashed by the idiots that I have to call my parents. Grandpa said that I can use part of my inheritance for the living costs, and I am very grateful to him. I told him that I will probably take up a job because, for me, it wasn't really about the money. It was more about the lack of acceptance and the neglect that I faced from my parents. All that rage was just that. He said that he respected my decision and that I was much more of a man than his own son, but he also said that he wanted me to enjoy life because responsibilities and duties will always keep on burdening me.

So we reached an agreement that I will try working, and if that strains me or doesn't work out for me, I will not hesitate and reach out for that inheritance because it is mine by right. I thanked him, and both of us cried a little. I don't think I will be using the inheritance, and I don't even mind working. It just feels nice to to have someone support me, to have someone to bank on, financially and more than that, psychologically. I guess I have missed this feeling my entire life, and it is all very overwhelming for me now. I won't be updating anymore because I am starting a new phase of my life away from home, and I want to keep the resentment at bay as much as possible.

Hopefully, I will not need to post again. I hope you enjoy this story. Guardians wrongly blamed my sibling for engaging in inappropriate behavior with my sister's garments and labeled him as a predator, but it was revealed that their canine was the culprit stealing her clothes. My brother is 15, my sister is 17, and I'm 23F. This is really stupid and it shouldn't have happened, but it did. Now I just want advice on how to make it better. Also this is the story my brother told me as I wasn't there. He was in his room playing on his phone minding his own business. He got up to take out the trash.

He came back to lay down on his bed. As he was laying down, he noticed their dog walking out of his room. He ignored it. Later on his sister 17 noticed clothes were missing. She went looking for it and found it in my brother's room. The problem was that his was wet and slimy. She immediately told our parents and they thought the worse. My dad, mom, and brother argued about it.

Rude things were said. Apparently mom said I knew you were weird but not this weird. My dad said I raised a predator. In the end my parents asked me to pick him up and let him stay with me for a couple of days. When I picked him up he didn't say anything and just sat in silence. He spent the entire time in the room he was staying in. He only came out for dinner. He skipped breakfast and lunch.

His eyes were always red when he came out, so I assume he was crying. I've never seen him cry. Most of the time when he's upset, he just has a stone face, so what they said must have got to him. Finally, at the end of the week his parents called me and said they wanted to talk to him, so they came over. Before they came over, I tried to talk to him, but he ignored me. When parents came, they apologized to him. Over the week they noticed more of sister clothes in his room until one day my dad caught the dog with my sister clothes. My brother just said okay and went home. I tried to ask my parents if he could

stay longer, but they said that wouldn't be necessary. Later on I got a call asking me what did he do over my house because he's just been in his room all day at their house. Is there anything I can do to help him feel better? Advice would be greatly unappreciated. Good news. He can stay with me until Sunday. I had to lie a little to parents to get him to come. I told them. I told them, he should get out the house because he spends most of his day sitting in one spot with online school. They didn't believe me at first, but I said it would be a chance to get him out his room. They finally agreed. He was about to go to sleep so I came just in time.

I think the plan right now is to just spend time with him this week. I'm broke so it's going to be mostly home stuff. I tried to talk to him on the car ride. I asked him if he's okay. He said he's fine and we had a little comment. conversation about his school. So at least he's talking now. He's in the spare room so everything is okay right now. Comment where op has replied, comment, poor fellow. Your parents seriously attacked this kid and to think they can just say I'm sorry and everything be fine is mind-boggling.

They destroyed any trust he had in them and this will not be an easy fix. It appears they had their mindset before even accusing him, thanks to your other sister. Yeah, he probably doesn't doesn't have much use for her either right now. Your brother needs space and time to heal. Being at home and being made to interact with this right now is punishment, even though they are his parents and sister. If I were you, I'd tell my parents what they did was inexcusable. I'd talk to him one on one and see if he wanted to stay with you for a few weeks. He's 15, being accused of creeping on his sister really put a dent in his self-esteem and self-worth. He needs time to heal. I would also be able to tell him you were there for him no matter what. He will eventually seek affirmation that he's not the weirdo he was labeled. Be there for him. As for your parents, good grief, they need counseling and your sister probably does too. They made their beds by striking him down so harshly, now they'll have to deal with it a while.

It's tough being a 15-year-old kid without these accusations. He really got put behind the eight ball with this situation. I hope the beat for him. Up, if I were you, I'd tell my parents what they did was inexcusable. I did tell them that was fucked up. They don't see it, though. They tried to pass it off as they were just upset in the moment, but I wasn't buying it. Talk to him one-on-one and see if he wanted to stay with you for a few weeks.

Sadly, he's ignoring my calls and texts. I am thinking about just driving to see him, though. And if he wants, he could stay with me for a while. I'm with him. I don't really know why they went all in one him. There has to be something larger happening if they can say all those things and not care how he feels. I'd, but they do need some help too. Update, this is going to be the only update.

It's long. So I've been asked to update the situation. Many of you guys asked that I let brother live with me, but I had to take him back to our parents' house this morning. The last update I gave was when my brother was allowed to spend the week. at my house. That was last Sunday. We spend the first day, Monday, at my house just talking. He spent most of the time in the room. At first he wasn't responding back. It was going nowhere quickly. So I ended the conversation by telling him our parents were wrong and that he is not weird. I didn't say it exactly like this, but I hope you get the point. He just had a stone face and we

stopped talking. Tuesday. He still didn't really come out of the room. I offered to go to McDonald's and he came out the room to eat at the table. We just talked about random different things. He wasn't really interested in the conversation until we started talking about my Xbox. We eventually started talking about Madden. He started talking about how good he is at the game. We finished eating run. He went back to his room. Wednesdays. I bought Madden. I don't play sports game. I play games like Cuphead or cartoon animated games. I asked if he wanted to play and he agreed. I know this is serious, but Madden absolutely sucks. The game started cheating as soon as we started. The first thing my player did was fumble the ball.

He was cailing me at it. He actually laughed a couple of times and he seemed to be enjoying himself. We spent a good portion of the day just playing. Thursday was pretty much the same as Wednesdays, but he was talking more. I was going to go to the movies, but COVID is still a thing. We eventually just settled to watching Netflix. He spent half the day in his room, but he is coming out more. Friday I decided to try to talk to him about the situation again. I pretty much told him I would talk to our parents to get them to understand why he was hurt by it.

I also took the advice of seeing if he wanted to talk to a professional. He asked me not to ask them about it. He said it was just better if nobody brought it up again. I was a little shocked, but there's not much I could do. We then decided to go to a walking trail. At first he didn't want to go, but I convinced him to come. We just spent more time talking. This also made me realize that I should talk to my siblings more often.

He seemed happier. Saturday or yesterday was pretty much us just talking again. We decide instead of Madden to just play random games I had. I don't have a lot, but I think he had a good time. When it was dinner time, he got kind of quiet again. I asked him what was wrong. He said he wasn't ready to go back home yet. I didn't know what to say.

I asked him if he wanted me to talk to our parents to see what we could do. He just said no again. I pretty much told him he could come to my house any time he wanted to. That leads us to today. He is back at his house. I was going to talk to our parents, but I assumed he has a reason for not wanting me to talk to them. I know you guys said something about getting him a therapist, but he said no to the idea. I did call my sister to see how she's doing.

She said she tried to apologize to brother, but he ignored her. I don't know what happening with that, but one thing at a time. And that's pretty much how the week went. Overall, he seemed much happier than he was last week. I texted him and he wants to come back over some time next week. This part has nothing to do with my brother, but it's about me. You don't have to read it. I'm going to be honest with you guys.

I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. I'm only 23 still trying to get my life together. I'm a firefighter, so I'm just glad that we get a lot of vacation time or else I would have had to work. I know people are thinking if you're a firefighter you should know what to do and why did you ask what the signs of depression are. I was never trainer on how to deal with somebody actively showing signs of depression. I was trained to help somebody who is in the process of trying to commit suicide and that training wasn't that good. It was basically try to talk them down and do whatever you can to get them to a hospital. I've yet to use this this training.

This is why I was panicking when everything was happening. People were telling me he could commit suicide. I know I should have kept a cool head, but it just felt different because it was family. They tell you not to panic, but I'm only human. I've been a firefighter for about two years now. Anyway, something else I wanted to say. I'm going to try to be there for both my brother and sister, but I made a mistakes too. Somebody brought up the point of when I found out what happened, what was my reaction.

I'm ashamed to admit it, but I didn't have one. I thought he was going to get over it and everything would be all right. I only started caring when I realized that he wasn't acting like his normal self, that when I realized the impact of what they said and how fucked up this all really is. So to the person who brought up this point. Thank you. This showed me that no matter how great my actions are looking in front of random strangers, the truth is that I had a similar mindset as my parents.

I don't think he's weird, but I guess my time spent around them made me desensitized to the things they say. I come gonna work to change that because it's not right. So to everybody thank you for the advice you've given. I see the mistake I've made and I'm 100% behind changing myself and being behind my brother. Comments where Op has replied, comment one, you're a great sister Op smile. I would try to invite him over often more so than just extending one forever open invitation. It'll make him feel more wanted up. I'll definitely try to keep hanging out with him and invite him over more often.

I'm also going to try to hang out with my sister more. I'm going to try to have a better relationship with both of them. Comment two, I have no idea what the fuck I'm doing. Sounds like you do to me. You care about your bro. That's all that needs to be done. Have you thought about introducing your brother to your pals at the station, maybe give him a tour? Up, when I graduated fire school we had like a family day.

We brought our family to where we did our training for five. fire school. So they all know my brother, sister, and parents. Comment 3, W-O-A firefighter at 23? Isn't it hard to get in? Up, not really. I know a 18-year-old in fire school right now. If you apply to the Wright County almost everybody gets. However, out of a class of 100, you will notice only about 10 to 15 people will pass the entire thing. Next story, offered my favorite nephew free housing for college, but my family demanded I include his poor cousin too. So when they started bullying him, I ruined the cousin's job interview out of spite. I, F-39, am very much not a kid person. I can tolerate them in small doses, but I also find them uninteresting slash annoying and don't want any of my

own. I'm well aware that some find my child unfriendliness off-putting and can strategically fake it until I make it most of them time. I just prefer to avoid situations slash relationships. where I'm expected to interact with kids, but when I can't, I radiate don't talk to me energy to deter them and will try to pawn them off slash redirect them and escape. I had the good fortune to be the baby of the family during my generation, but as my siblings and cousins started having kids, they resented me for being a deadbeat aunt, as one cousin put it. They kept pushing me to be involved with their kids, and I eventually snapped and told them how I felt about kids in general. afterwards, I was slowly iced out socially. I stopped trying when I was hospitalized and only one person even bothered to visit or even call. The one exception was my brother Michael, M. 43. He never questioned or undermined my decision. He was that one sole visitor when I was hospitalized. He never tried to force

his son Adam, M18, upon me, nor did he resent that I didn't take a serious interest in Adam until he was 14. Even when he was in the trenches in regard to parenting, he still made time to call or text, if sporadically. In the present, Adam is the only niece-slash-nephew that I care about. Yes, his cousins did not receive a fair opportunity to bond with me. Yes, I'm playing favorites, I've set up a 10k college fund, I take him out for experiences monthly, and I've given him some pricey gifts, while his cousins get zilch. Yes, this has caused friction in the past, but I've always been happy to be the bad guy. I try to be discreet. Adam has been instructed to attribute the gifts to his father and not me, and I did not tell him about the college fund

until a month ago. My latest gift, however, has led to a major fallout. I live in a desirable location in a major city with a while Michael slash Adam lives nearby. Adam was recently accepted to his dream school in said city, but it's out of his budget. I offered to let him live rent-free with me, which would allow him to commute, my house is much close to campus, and thus afforded. The issue is my other nephew Alex was also accepted into that school, and it's also his dream school. Alex comes from a disadvantaged background while Adam is middle class. Alex won a partial scholarship to said school, but it's still not enough. When he heard about my offer to Adam, he asked, using Adam as an intermediary, to be included.

I refused. I've nothing against Alex, but I also haven't talked to him for 15 years, not that we were ever close, and we simply don't have an emotional connection. It would also come at a massive opportunity cost. I rent out my spare bedrooms, and I'd lose 38K in rental income. Yes, this is well below market rate over four years. Most of my relatives are now in arms. They've given the ultimatum that either one I extend my offer to Alex as well to I, recent. my offer three, Adam rejects my offer, or they will go and see with Adam and Michael. They're calling

Adam the golden child, he's an only child, say that Alex deserves my help far more, and are tired of my favoritism. They're not wrong about my favoritism, but honestly. Idgaff, about my ex-family. Though I never blocked them or had a big fallout, we've been effectively NC. I value chosen family over people who happen to share my DNA and we've both made choices that demoted them to the latter category. I'm also of the opinions that aunts and uncles are entitled to have preferences. Furthermore, I don't see what makes Alex more deserving. He certainly needs the help more, but that's not my tab to pay. Adam is in a more complicated situation. Michael is willing to support whatever Adam chooses and refuses to pressure him. Adam and Alex aren't close, but accepting my

offer would mean giving up many other familial bonds that Adam does value, rejecting it means Adam giving up on his dream school. I do feel bad that my offer is forcing Adam to choose. Edit, I can't believe that I have to say this explicitly, but I don't hate kids. They're just not my cup of tea. You cannot like something and not want to throw it into a trash compactor. Update 1. I saw a few questions in my last post that I wanted to address. Why not try to form a bond with Alex now. He comes across as a gold digger and disingenuous seeing as he was perfectly happy being distant from me without something to gain. Why distance yourself for Alex's parents since? I didn't. I just don't have a reason to try to form a bond with him. Just like I don't have a reason

to connect with cashier at my local grocery store. Many people that didn't meet by circumstance meet because of a social lubricant that brought them together. Ants slash nephew ties are facilitated by said aunts ties to the child's parents slash wider family, and said ties do not exist in this case. A relationship with Alex might also be a liability if our relatives try to weaponize it in some way, and given that they already tried with Adam, I'll pass. Why didn't you put your bio family on an information diet? I did. Unfortunately, I suspect that Adam slipped up during his excitement at being given the chance to attend his dream school after thinking that he couldn't. I've always stressed the importance of secrecy, but up to this point he's never experienced conditional love, and in his

naïveness, believed the best from his relatives. It's a lesson that I wish he'd learned in a different manner, but what's done is done. I did see the suggestion about claiming that I have a long-term lease on my other rooms, and that probably wouldn't work. My relatives would probably demand that I try to break the lease, taking on the penalties, or that Alex and Adam share a room. Could you compromise? Is there a win-win solution for both Adam and Alex? Maybe let them share a room? Perhaps, but you never negotiate with bullies it sends the wrong message. Also, it would be incredibly awkward and tense between Alex and I, never mind Alex and Adam, who would be living in the same room. Why not just rent out the room and send Adam the proceeds so he can get a room elsewhere?

My rates are well below market value, and it would not cover the cost of a room elsewhere in the area for Adam. I could raise the price to market value, but then I'd have to explain to said potential tenants why they're being charged so much more than the tenant that I already have. I also don't want to raise my rates on principle. I don't like that landlord slash private equity are intentionally squeezing the housing market. The only reason why I'm renting out my rooms is because they'd be sitting empty otherwise, and offering them cheaply was a compromise between pragmatism and my values. I actually would have preferred a smaller place but there weren't any smaller houses that ticked off my non-negotiable requirements. You've no right to feel hurt over

being abandoned in the hospital. You pushed them away. As acknowledged in my post, everyone made decisions that contributed to me going and see, I was disinterested in the center of their world, and they couldn't accept me as who I was. And while I certainly self-selected out of kid-centric events, I repeatedly tried to reach out to arrange kid-free hangouts. Heck, would have been okay with occasional text-slash phone calls that was literally the only way Michael and I stayed in touch until Adam was seven. And the hospital incident didn't hurt me so much as it was the final nail that ended any hope of reconciliation. I was well aware that our relationship was fraying well before the incident.

Update as for the actual updates, Michael, his wife and I were gearing up to have a talk with Adam to discuss his options, go over the pros and cons and long-term effects, reaffirm our support and nudge him in the right direction. It turns out, we didn't need to, though not for the reason that we'd like. Adam called me yesterday, clearly upset. Apparently, his cousins have been talking smack behind his back, saying some really nasty and cruel things and targeting some of his deepest insecurities. Even if he wanted to make peace with Alex, it wouldn't be possible now. I still think that it would be beneficial to have the talk with him, though,

if only to help process his feelings. It isn't all doom and gloom, though. A friend of a friend is apparently an interviewer for a job that one of the nasty cousins has applied for, and asked about a week ago if I knew them. We look similar and have an unusual family name, and had any tea. No, I was not listed as a reference. I didn't know the cousin well enough to comment back then, but now? Guess who's going to get a call and a warning not to hire that cousin due to bad character?

Did I also mention that said job was in a small industry with typically only one employer per area? Yes, I'm a petty queen and I own it. Update 2, I thought it was implied that Adam was accepting my offer and staying with me for college, but yes, he is. Michael, his wife and I had the conversation with Adam to help him process what his cousins did, we assured him that nothing that happened was his fault. He's still sad, but seems to be doing better. Speaking of my plans, I did make the call to the said acquaintance about my cousin. They mentioned that said cousin had been neck in neck with their competition and there was one final,

inconveniently timed, for the acquaintance, interview, and they outright thank me for giving them an excuse to cancel. The Petty B-T-C-H and me also decided to look up nearby similar jobs and found that unlike one I just blocked the cousin from, they were not unionized, likely mismanaged, and paid considerably less. The Cherry on top of them were. is that when I told Adam, he seemed really happy, and added that the sight for the job that the cousin just lost was a 10-minute commute. His mom scolded me for being childish, but her face said otherwise. Unless something unexpected happens, I expect that this will be the final update. I hope you enjoy this story. I overheard my partner telling her friend that I will never excel as a lover like her former partner did, because he was naturally endowed and I am struggling to move on from what I overheard. Now our relationship is broken. It was quite by accident that I heard this. We had a group of our friends over and as the night went on we all kind of busted out into little groups.

Some of us were in one room playing Texas Hold'em and a couple of others were watching the Lord of the Ring Marathon. I thought she was watching the movies but she and one of her close friends were actually sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and talking. Our group had run out of soda so I got up to go to the kitchen to get drinks and a couple of things. As I'm rounding the corner I hear my fiancé talking and before I completely come in the room I hear her clearly say Jason is great but he will never be the lover that Bill was. She then followed it up with its not really fair to Jason though, Bill was just really gifted down there. At first I thought about just walking back into the card game and pretending like we didn't have any extra soda or food but I decided to kind of make a noise and go in.

Her friend caught eye of me rounding the corner and I could see her make a face to my fiance letting her know I was there. Of course she has no idea I hurt her and she just stops talking to her and asks me how I'm doing and if I'm having fun. I was tempted to say something like I'm having as much fun as someone who is not gifted down there can, but I didn't. I just said yes and proceeded to get my stuff and go back and finish the night. I just acted like nothing was wrong the rest of the night and went to bed. Needless to say it fucked me up. I mean, fuck me up bad. I've never been jealous or what you would call insecure about myself until that moment.

I couldn't sleep that night and I went through a myriad of emotions while laying there. At first I was angry. Then I was humiliated, then I was depressed. Then I was angry again. Look, I realized that the male ego seemed stupid to women and even guys who are totally self-assured. I would have agreed with most of this prior to that night, but once it has been damaged it as a bitch. I tried to hide any form of emotion about it or ever let her know, but as the days went on I just kept getting worse and worse. I was avoiding her at all costs,

and while she was suspicious she didn't really say anything. That is until she attempted to be intimate with me a few days later and I flat out rejected her. It wasn't by a conscious decision on my part, by the way. I had made the decision on my own to just try and get over it and move on. But in the moment instead of being sexually aroused I felt deeply inadequate and ashamed. Nothing was happening no matter how much either of us tried. She asked me what was wrong and I just told her I must have been stressed from work but she would not believe that or let it go. So much to my humiliation there I laid, naked in bed, unable to get an erection.

I came clean and told her what I heard. Well, this did not go over well at all. At first she tried to tell me I did not hear her correctly, but I just repeated to her verbatim what she had told her friend. Well, once she couldn't deny it, she then tried to apologize and to her credit she tried to listen to my feelings on the matter. Which once again I am sure was more of a big turn-off for her because I was a wreck emotionally. She tried to tell me how much of a better person I was and how I satisfied her and she wanted nobody else. but all I could hear was Charlie Brown's teacher noise. It's been almost a month and I have zero desire to be with her sexually.

None. She is now getting frustrated about this as well, but no matter what I have tried, I just cannot get past this. It's not like she said we were both good lovers or anything like that. She clearly said he was far superior and my guess is that being gifted down there means he was significantly larger than me as well. Well, I know I can do all kinds of things with my hands, tongue, and whatever else. But no matter what I do I can't grow in size. Obviously she refuses to talk about that with me saying that no matter what she says it will only make things worse because even if she says something positive about me I won't believe her. She's most likely right.

Some backstory here. He dumped her. It was not a mutual breakup, he flat out dumped her and broke her heart. I know this because early on in our relationship she told me this. She said she wasn't ready to be serious about anybody because her previous ex left her and emotionally broke her. So this is not a case of me even being able to say well she's with me because she wants to be. If he hadn't dumped her, she would never have left him. Now I have no idea if after all of these years she would leave me for him if he would come back but I don't think she would.

I just don't know what to do here. I can feel myself checking out of the relationship. I know this is petty as shit, but hearing a person you love tell someone else they prefer to have segs with someone else is just devastating to me. Her telling me all of my other good qualities has only made it worse because she is saying things that I think appeal to her and maybe other women, but being told I am a good provider and will make a great husband makes me feel like shit. Like what would happen if I lost my good paying job or better yet what if I were to get injured and couldn't make anything more than. state assistance. Would she be there to support and help me? Basically what I feel like right now is a really good friend who she just allowed to have SEGS with. I know in my head that this is not

correct but in my heart that is what I feel. I'm sorry for the length here and I don't even know what I am asking here. I am totally lost and if this continues I just think I'm going to break our engagement. Edit 1. Holy God. I made this post last night and answered a couple of questions and then went to bed and got up today and went Christmas shopping hoping to make me forget my troubles and didn't even log in until just now. I have not even started to read the, at this point, 7.7,000 comments on this post. I don't know what anyone has said yet but thank you all for commenting either way. I am now going to begin the massive undertaking of looking at the comments. Also, thank you for the gold and silver kind internet strangers. Edit 2, Dear God.

I read all the way down to the bottom of the page thinking I had gotten through most of everything and then at the bottom it said load the 5.5k more posts. I'm stopping for the night, well morning actually. I was going to respond to people individually but there is just no way. I haven't even started reading the direct messages to me yet nor have I opened any of the 20 chat screens. There are issues I want out there because there are a couple of things that are being said that are not accurate. One, she was to use the Barney Gumble phrase using sweet, sweet drunk talk. In other words, her and her friend were drunk while talking.

Nope, neither of us drink. We don't even have it in the house. Two, that I am upset she told her friend. Well, this is an odd thing, before I posted this honestly I wasn't that upset about this part. I was then and am still far more upset that this is how she feels. However now reading a lot of the post I have become somewhat aggravated that she did share this with her friend. I would never say anything about her to anyone that would put her in a lesser light. 3. That I am an insecure man child who should just man up and learn to do better.

Well, I'm certain the first part is true, being insecure and all. But the last part is just out of my control. No matter what I do I will only ever be seven inches long. We have talked about this by the way, when she was trying to build me up. She said that I was already great with everything but the one thing I can't control. Okay, so I gave myself about a half inch to feel better, four. No, I'm not going to do anything rash. It's already been a month so it's not like this happened last week.

But yes, I have to decide what I'm going to do here before long. It's not fair to either of us as I am just coasting through this and no longer committed. 5. She is sorry that I heard it. She said she is sorry she said it, but at the end of the day she would not be sorry if I didn't catch her saying it. It is what it is. But yes, I do believe she is regretting it because she has basically been a mess since I first told her. Me not wanting to be with her is bothering her a lot according to her. I don't know how much of that I believe, but right now I guess I don't know why she would lie. It really has wrecked hell on our Christmas spirit this year. I know that.

Edit 3. Engineer for those who keep asking what I do for a living. She is a paralegal. Edit 4. People have been asking about the relationship with the ex and how I know she was heartbroken. We met about nine months after they separated. I know that ultimately he wanted to be with someone else, although she has claimed he never cheated. He just ended things so he could be with another woman. She approached me at a local workshop and we started dating. On our fourth date when things started to get physical, she broke down crying about the X. It was certainly weird to hold someone while they cried about someone else, but I did it. We sporadically dated for a couple more months in which time I never tried to cross any boundaries physically because it was obvious she wasn't over him.

So while we just went out of dates I tried to keep myself of the mind that we were just friends because I didn't want to commit either. after close to two months she drags me from my car to her apartment and begins to tell me how much she has appreciated my patience with her and how she felt stupid about dragging me along for so long. Obviously that was our first night together. Within three months of that she is telling me that she loves me. So yes, she was still hung up on her ex for fact when we got together. I had thought slash hoped she was over him before this happened. update one, the main thread has over 8.3K posts and is a couple of day old now, but I wanted to try and respond to some general thoughts.

It is absolutely impossible for me respond to everyone or even most people and at this point putting up edits I think is counterproductive because the thread is a few days old now so I doubt people are going back to reread the op. I don't want to make an update there yet because I'm not really updating anything. Nothing has happened yet, per se, however, I have a few things to get off of my chest. So this seems like the best place to do that before I update my op. I have had so many people post on the original thread and twice as many people send me PMs telling me to hit the weight room and get in shape and transform myself into some form of weightlifting God. I am sure that these people are all filled with the best of intentions.

Well, not all of them because I have also had several people call me all for. forms of names while telling me to hit the weights. Here is the problem for those people. They are using a stereotype about engineers and think that I fit that stereotype. I was a state finalist in wrestling in high school and got a partial scholarship to a division two school for wrestling. I competed both my freshman and sophomore years. However, due to throwing a goddamn baseball I tore my rotator cuff and while my recovery had

me well on my way back my physical therapy prohibited me from being ready. for my junior year. I did not go back for my senior year as my workload and girlfriend were too much to also dedicate the time for wrestling. Wrestling was very physically demanding and time-consuming. Now I freely admit that not training to compete did not leave me in even one-eighth the shape I was in at my prime I have stayed in shape. To this day I still lift and do cardio at my local gym. I've been getting my ass kicked lately by my friend who is doing a mite I work out. I've been trying to keep up with him but freely admit I have a lot of leg work to do. Now this leads me to want to focus on a couple of other things. You will notice I said girlfriend. Contrary to what some of you have said

or implied I was not some in cell or neck beard prior to meeting my fiancé. I have had several girlfriends and yes even a couple of NSA relationships. So that is why this bothered me more than it probably should have. In other words prior to this while I may not have been the world's most confident guy I never felt like it was an issue. I've never, ever, ever had another woman say something like this in earshot of me about me. I mean, did they say it when I couldn't hear? I have no idea but till the moment she said that I never had any self-doubt or lack of confidence. Now does me having this mental breakdown over this make me a man-child, weak or straight-up pussy as I've been called. I don't know, maybe. Hell probably. But bluntly speaking, I've never had

anything like this happened to me before. Every breakup I've ever gone through was for the most part mature. I had a very childish breakup in high school, but does that even count? Also to all of the geniuses that keep telling me to learn a new technique or practice or just plain get better at Sags. That's not the issue here, guys. She didn't say that I could work on the issue at hand. She straight up told her friend that I would never be able to measure up, so to speak,

because of a physical attribute that I can do nothing about. I could become an Oriental Lickmaster and at the end of the day I am never going to be able to finish her by jack hammering with what I can only imagine must be a nine inches dong. Should that matter? Well, it fucking doesn't matter if it should matter, it obviously does to her or she would not have said it. I don't know of any single way we can unring this bell. Which then brings me to the biggest thing I want to get off of my chest. There are several poster, both men and women and ironically gay males over 30 who have a subreddit that I guess I am a topic on, who have said it's just sags.

Well, those words do not exist in my vocabulary for someone I love. I admit that I had a couple of NSA partners in grad school but even with them I developed feelings and had to part because I could not just do that. I don't do ONS and since my mid-20s have only participated SEGs via a relationship. I found out that I am just not capable of having segs and just having segs. I get it, there are many of you who don't feel that way. Great for you, I don't feel that way and I am not going to fight myself to make myself feel that way. Do I need to be my fiancé's best ever? Well, why the hell should I not want that?

If you would have asked me before that night I would have thought I was. But now that I know I'm not. Well, no, I'm not really okay with the fact that I can never measure up. I mean if I could work on something or improve something or take more time or something, sure. But to hear her say I can never be as good. Yay, sorry that is a little more than my ego can take. Call me whatever name you want, but it is what it is. But some of the really most disgusting stuff that was said to me is that I should be happy

that she is with me and allows me to have segs with her so she must want me. allows me to have SEGS with her. I cannot describe in enough words how that offends me. Maybe I've lived in a Disney fantasy world for me, but I always wanted to be with someone who wanted to be with me. Not someone who allows me out of some form of obligation. So does that make me a sissy, as a few of you have PM me? I don't care if it does.

I refuse to be a person who begs for SEGS, period. If whoever I'm with does not want to be with me as much as I want to be with her, then fuck it. I'll just pay an escort and probably save myself money in the long run. Look, I don't know for 100% sure what I'm going to do yet. I have a very strong feeling what I'm going to do, but I haven't done anything yet. If this is the wrong forum, just let me know. Anyway, I'll try and do my best to respond to posts here. Update 2. It all came to a head last night. She just came out and asked me if I did not love her anymore and all that I could tell her was that a very large part of me still did but that what she said had really made it so that

another part of me just didn't anymore. This started a larger conversation that I won't bore you with but ultimately it came down to me saying that I would have heard that he was just better at something or more attentive to something or was able to do something that I would have felt like I could have worked on it. I would have listened to anything she wanted worked on any technique or anything else that she would have shared with me. But to know that I was never going to measure up simply because of a physical issue was not something I thought I could get over any time soon or if I ever could for that matter. I was even honest and said that if it was just a ONS she had or some random guy who was just

huge I might be able to get past that. But knowing that it was a guy who she was still madly in love with when I met her and only after time did she ever start to come around than it was just more than I could handle, she kept trying to tell me how much better I was at everything else and that I should not throw away a lifetime over one aspect. I told her that that one aspect sadly was just a high for me, not all things are equal and that honestly it is a mental failing on my part that it is but whether it is genetics or a learned trait or whatever that yes I needed to be my spouse's best and she has already made it clear that I can never be. I tried my best to be gentle, I tried to take all of the

blame of stating that I knew that my attitude was probably not healthy, but it was who I am. By the way, I'm typing this as though this were a clean conversation, it wasn't, there was lots of crying, by both of us. This is not a happy ending or even a satisfying one. I am beyond fucked up in the head over the entire situation. Everybody's Christmas is ruined. We had big family gatherings that we both were attending together and now we have to somehow break it to our families what has happened. This alone is causing me massive stress because my parents loved her and what in the hell am I going to say is the reason why we are not together. She didn't cheat and if I say that I felt like she was still hung up on her ex, she will obviously deny it and she

will tell them the truth. It's fucked up no matter how this goes down. In the end I feel like a massive failure. I feel like a failure as a man because of not living up to comparison and I feel like a failure because I wasn't able to just man up and either get over it. She has begged me to go to couples counseling and initially I said no because at the end of the day what does it change? We can talk about every single thing and I can try and look at things from a different way and at the end of the day the woman who I wanted to marry just told one of our friends that no matter what I do I will never be as good as her ex. I just cannot see five years from now ever being okay with this. But because she legitimately seems heartbroken

I agreed to go, but that does not mean I will keep going. Today I moved out a lot of my stuff and am staying with a co-worker for a few days until I can get a place for myself. She has been with her sister all day. I feel like shit. Thank you to everyone who took the time to type out a response. I honestly have tried to read everything even if I didn't reply to very many. The bitch of all of this is that I still love her. There is so much of me right now that wants to pick up the phone and call her and beg her to come back. Edit 1. Well, once again I posted this and then went away for a while. I went with my friend to see Mortal Engines and then to dinner and then we've been talking for a long while so I started reading a while ago.

It is going to take me forever to read and once again I don't think responding individually will ever happen because of the large number of posts and private messages. But, thank all of you for reading and responding. Edit 2, I guess I do want to share one thing I spoke with her about. When we were having our very long conversation I presented her with a scenario for her to compare. I know her well enough to know that comparing body parts or sexual prowess isn't going to impact her the same way it would me. So I put the scenario to her like this. I said, what if you walked in and overheard me talking with my friend Tim and you heard this? Jill is great but she will never understand me and comfort me the way Tiffany did but it's not Jill's fault Tiffany is just the smartest most compassionate person I've ever known and Jill just isn't as smart.

Then if she would confront me about saying those things about her that my response to her would have been. I love you for all of your other qualities. Nobody makes a sandwich like you do and I think long term you won't gauge me for my money at first. She tried to say that this was a totally different issue but once we talked more, about it she finally agreed it is because of the way we both approach and value sex. She ultimately admitted that this would really hurt her feelings but she would not break up with me over it. I then responded that even in my make-believe scenario, which by the way I would never say to anyone out loud about anyone I loved, she could improve her level of education and learn to

be more compassionate. Edit 3. If anyone even reads this I want to add one last thing. People have been telling me what a whiny bitch I am, that's one of the more kind things they've said, because I can't get over someone else in the world having a bigger dick than me. Not going to lie and say I'm thrilled with it, but I'm not dumb enough to think I have a giant magic wand or anything. I had grown up believing what I now know to be a lie that women don't care about size. Some don't, but obviously some do and my ex is one of those that obviously did. But even with that ultimately I might have been able to get over it if it was just said as a matter.

of fact. But hearing that no matter what I did, how much I loved her or any other thing that I was never going to be as good as what has bothered me since. Yes, size is obviously a big part of it, but if I hadn't heard that I would never be the lover I think I might have been okay. Well, not okay, but at least not relationship killing. Yes, I overvalue Sags. I get that. Yes, it is very important to me and well, frankly, I want to be wanted as much as I want to want someone, if that makes any sense. Yes, I know whoever I date in the future will most likely have had someone who is either bigger, better, or whatever.

But I would really hope that they would not be still hung up on it a few years later. Update 3, I wasn't going to post anymore, but I am still getting daily direct messages wanting to know how things are going. I do appreciate the kind words and concerns. But just so anyone who cares can know. It is over. I went to counseling with her on three different occasions and honestly I tried to have an open mind about it, but at the end of the day the obstacle was just too much to overcome. I even gave her an opportunity to walk back her statement or amend it or well do whatever she wanted to with it.

But instead she doubled down in a way. I think by that time she was very frustrated as well. Neither of us are really happy about this. It has been an absolute nightmare for me trying to avoid telling you. people slash family why we are no longer together. Of course I tried the old it's none of your business to some of them but that failed spectacularly and since I refused to tell they decided she cheated on me and started spreading that around. I've had to do a lot of damage control over that. I've decided to continue with therapy on a personal level because honestly this entire thing has

really messed with my head and I have no self-esteem left at all. I've only seen her once since we separated and it was the hardest thing I've ever had to do in my own. life. She is now, justifiably so, in the angry stage. She is furious with me and has called me everything that you can imagine and then even made up some words. I hope you enjoy this story. Mill covertly added a substance into my stew while I was expecting, leading to my hospitalization for three days and posing a risk to my unborn child, yet she says she was just trying to help. I'm 12 weeks pregnant. We told family at six weeks after the first scan because I felt like I needed people in the loop in case anything

went wrong. My husband wanted to wait longer, but I pushed for it. His mom was the first person we told in person. I thought it would be a nice moment. It was for like five minutes. Then it turned into a routine that took over my week. She started coming by every other day. I'm not exaggerating. She has a spare key for emergencies that I forgot about and she used the door like. She used the door like she lived here. It would be like 10 a.m. or 7 p.m. or right when I got out of the shower. I would hear the door and then shoes on the mat and then her voice calling my name. She brought bags. Containers, jars, bottles, printouts. She said she had a list and needed to go through it. She had notes from a Facebook group. She had stories about birth from women she knew from way back.

She said the microwave destroys something in food and if I use it the baby won't get what it needs. She said raw milk has what the baby needs and that milk from the store is dead. She said if I reach up to get something from the top shelf I could wrap the cord around the baby. My first instinct was to laugh because I thought it was a joke and then I saw her face and it wasn't. I told her my OB said the microwave is fine and raw milk is not fine and the arm thing makes no sense. She shook her head and said doctors work for companies and the old ways worked. I said, look, I appreciate care, but I'm not doing any of that. For a bit I tried to set up boundaries.

I told her text before coming. I told her I need rest on work days. She nodded and then turned up again with another bag and said it was quick and she would leave soon. I worked from home and I would be in a meeting with my camera off and I could hear her opening the fridge and rearranging food. She threw out a box of frozen meals and left a long note about why they are bad. I told her not to. She said I should thank her. I told my husband to talk to her and he did, but he is soft when it comes to her. He's her only kid and his dad passed and I know he carries that and I do try to get it. Then the day that everything went sideways. I had a work call,

then a nap because I felt off. She came over around noon with soup and bread and said, it would settle my stomach. I ate it. I remember it tasted like broth and something sweet that stuck on the back of my tongue. I asked what was in it and she said bones, herbs, love. I rolled my eyes at the last bit and didn't push. Around 3 p.m. my stomach started to cramp. Not like normal. It felt like waves but without breaks. I went to the bathroom and then again and again. I felt hot and dizzy. I remember lying on the floor because the tile felt less warm. I texted my husband come home now and then I vomited and saw a clump that looked like ground plant and that smell came back and I felt my throat burn. I panicked about the baby.

That's the only thought I had. I called my OB's office and the nurse said go to ER. My husband got home and saw me on the floor and started to panic and then tried to steady me and put shoes on me and get me to the car. I said get a bag for the soup. He said what? I said the soup. He grabbed the pot. At the ER they took me in fast after I said I was pregnant and vomiting and cramps.

They took blood, urine, vitals, the usual. They asked what I ate. I said soup from my mother-in-law. They asked what was in it. I said I didn't know. They asked if I had any other symptoms and I said there was a weird sweet taste. They put in fluids and they put in fluids and and medicine for nausea.

They did an ultrasound and the tech didn't say much, just that we'd wait for the doctor. I was trying not to look at the screen. My husband squeezed my hand and stared at the wall. After a while the doctor came and said the baby looked okay for now, but they needed to keep me because I was dehydrated and my lab showed something off and they wanted to monitor. I asked what off meant.

He said signs of food-borne illness and something that looked like contamination with plant compounds and they needed to figure out which. He asked if I had taken any herbs. I said no. He asked about powders or teas. I said no. And then my husband looked at me

and then at the pot and said her mom brought soup and she's into herbal stuff and maybe she added something. They admitted me. I stayed three days. I went from scared to angry to numb to scared again. Every time a nurse came in I asked to check the heart. They humored me a couple times and then told me to rest because stress doesn't help. I lay there and kept replaying the last few weeks.

The drop-ins. The jars. The posts she read out loud. The time she told me to put a copper coin on my belly to align something. I thought about my own mom who lives far and calls me once a week and says, How are you? Do you need anything? And waits for me to ask. I thought about my husband and how he moved between rooms and

tried to be with me and also text his mom. He showed me a text from her that said, How is she? And he didn't reply, and then she texted, I feel sick with worry, and he still didn't reply. On the second day my husband came in and he had this look like he'd seen a thing and didn't know where to put it. He said his mom confessed. He said she bought a hormone balancing powder from a woman in a Facebook group. $3,000. I said $3,000. He said yes. She thought it would support the baby. I asked what was in it. He said the cellar won't say, it's proprietary.

His mom said the cellar told her to add a small scoop to food and it would fix imbalances. His mom said she put it in my soup. She said she thought I wouldn't notice but that it would help and later she was going to tell me. After I went to the hospital she messaged the cellar and the cellar blocked her. She started crying on the phone and said she only wanted to help and she loves me like family. The doctor came in while he was telling me this and my husband told him and the doctor wrote it down and said, okay, we're sending samples to toxicology and will treat symptoms and keep an eye on the baby. I kept thinking if I hadn't asked for the pot he wouldn't have brought it and maybe no one would ever know. I kept thinking about the scoop in the soup and the way I tasted something sweet and ignored it.

I kept thinking about all the lines we drew and how she stepped over them with a smile and a bag in a story and I felt stupid for letting it happen. Then I felt guilty for thinking of her like that because she's alone and I know she has no one else. I went in circles. I tried to sleep and then I would wake up and check the monitor and then stare at the ceiling. On day three they said I could go home. They said keep fluids, keep food simple, watch for fever or bleeding, call if anything changes. I called my OB to book a follow-up. We got home and I stepped into the kitchen and looked at the counter and the sink and the fridge.

and I wanted to throw out everything. I wiped down the counter three times. My husband stood there and said, I'm sorry, and I said, I know it's not you, but she crossed a line and I can't see her right now. He said, I get it. He called her and said, we need space. She cried and said she didn't mean harm and she didn't know it would make me sick. I heard her through the phone. The sound didn't match the facts.

I went to bed. So here is where I am. We haven't seen her since the hospital. We muted her texts. We didn't block because she lives alone and I don't want her to spiral. She sent long messages. I didn't read all of them. She wants to apologize.

She wants to drop off soup again. I told my husband I am going no contact for now. He said okay. He's been checking in on her from a distance. I know some people will say call the police. I thought about it. I don't know how to prove it beyond her telling us and the pot, but we don't even have the pot now. The hospital has samples, but I don't know what they can do with that.

I also think of the fallout and how that would suck all air out of the next months and I can't do that. I just want calm and a baby that is okay. My mill is not a screamer or a plate thrower or anything like that. She speaks in a low voice and says please and thank you and offers help. and then she did this. I'm trying to hold both things. I'm not asking for legal advice here. I just want to know if I'm wrong for drawing a line as hard as I can.

I'd offer saying no contact with someone who says love and then adds a scoop of something from a stranger to my food without telling me while I'm pregnant. Edit, I guess this is an update because time passed and things happened. It's been almost two weeks since the hospital. I feel okay now. I can eat. The follow-up scan was fine. I'm back at work. We didn't block her number, like I said, but we muted everything because the constant ding made my pulse go up.

She kept sending messages the first few days that were all please pick up and I can explain and then some long ones that started to sound like she was defending the choice. Then she went silent for a week. My husband started to worry. He drove by her place on his way back from work and saw the car and the curtain the same and got out and knocked and no answer. He asked the neighbor who said they saw her yesterday bringing in groceries. That settled him. That night she sent a message that said she couldn't believe we were doing this to her after all she's done for us and that what happened was a mistake and we should know her heart and that she would learn to live without expecting anything

from anyone. I read it once and put the phone face down and went to brush my teeth and I stared at the mirror for a while. I kept thinking how the word mistake covers so many things. It doesn't doesn't sit the same here. My husband didn't reply to that message either. He said he wants to let it cool. I said I don't want to manage her feelings. He said I know. Edit. Two more days went by and my husband said he couldn't sit with it anymore and wanted to check on her in person. I said I'm not going. He said he'd go alone and keep it short. He was gone for two hours. When he came back he sat down and didn't talk for a minute. it. Then he said they talked. She cried. She said she was sorry. She said she got carried away. He asked her where she got the powder and she told him more about the group. He asked for the

seller's info again, but she said the account is gone. He told her she cannot add anything to my food ever again and she said yes. He asked her if she understood why we are angry and scared and she said she does now. He told her we need space. She said she respects that. He said he believes she meant it. I said people say a lot in tears and then go back to what they do. He said he knows, but he wanted to tell me. I sent her a message after I sat with that for a bit. I kept it simple. I said I heard what she told him and I'm glad she understands now and I appreciate the apology. and I need space to focus on work in this pregnancy and I need quiet. I said this is not about punishment.

This is about safety and trust and I need time. She wrote back and said she will wait until I'm ready. She didn't add extra lines to justify her choice or tell me what to eat or mention the group. The next days felt normal in a way I was craving. I worked, I ate simple food, I walked. My husband and I did small house stuff and made a list for things we need before leave. I know some people will say I'm letting her off easy. I know other people will say I'm too hard. I keep going back to the line I drew, I need space. I'm not making her earn anything.

I'm just not ready to let her in while I'm still trying to steady myself. A couple weeks after that I felt like I could breathe enough to think about next steps. I told my husband I didn't want to be in a cold war with his mom until the birth. I also didn't want to pretend. nothing happened. I told him I'd be open to a visit later, with rules. He asked me to pick the rules and he would say them. I said no drop-ins, no food from her kitchen, no comments on my body, no advice unless I ask, no gifts that go in or on my body. He said, got it. He wrote them down. Edit, week passed and I realized this is becoming another update. We decided I was ready to see her for dinner at our place, with food from a place we order from. I wanted to see if she could sit and talk

like a person without turning my home into a clinic. I sent her a text in the morning, come by at 6, we're getting takeout, please don't bring food or anything for me to drink. She replied, okay, I will come empty-handed. She arrived at 6, 10. She knocked. She didn't use the key. I noticed that first. She had a small purse and nothing else. She took off her shoes and asked where to put them. I said by the mat. We sat. My husband asked about her day.

She talked about her neighbor's dog in a plant she bought and a TV show she started. I kept waiting for the shift. It didn't come. The food arrived and we ate. She didn't comment on what I ordered. She didn't watch me chew. She didn't hover over my plate. After we ate, she said she wanted to say something and asked if that was okay.

I nodded. She said she is sorry and she should have listened and she gets it now, and she will not give me advice or food or anything without asking me first. She said she let fear run the show and that she will deal with that herself. She said she hopes in time I can forgive her, but she understands if I can't yet. I said, thank you for saying that and I am not ready to talk about forgiveness, but I'm open to trying to build trust back with small steps. She said okay.

We put on a simple game on TV that we can half watch and talked about names for a bit. She asked what we're thinking and we told her a couple we like and she smiled. She didn't push for a family name. She didn't bring up the powder or the group. When she left, she hugged my husband and asked me if I'm okay with a hug. I said yes. It was a short hug. She said good night and left.

I locked the door and leaned on it and breathed out. I told my husband I know people online will say I caved. I don't feel like that. I feel like I can try this as long as the rules hold. I don't want to spend the next months in a fight if we can avoid it, but I also won't let her in without change. Some days after that she sent a couple links, but they were from government sites about vaccines and nutrition

and she wrote sharing because I'm reading, not telling you what to do. I didn't click them right away. When I did, I saw they were basic. No comments that sounded like hidden orders. She also texted a picture of a baby blanket she is knitting and said she will only bring it if I want it. I said that's fine. That felt like progress to me, but I'm keeping one foot on the break. Edit, I hit the next appointment. Everything looked okay. My OB said to keep doing what I'm doing. I told her a bit about the situation without going into names and she said protect your stress levels and keep your boundaries and document anything that crosses lines. That last bit calmed me because it gave me a plan. My husband asked if we want to give his mom a copy of the key back.

We took that old one back for emergencies. I told him no, not now. He agreed. We had two more small visits like that. Coffee from a place, a short walk in the park, simple talk. She asked me once if I needed anything for the nursery and I said we're okay and she didn't insist. One afternoon she said she found a pregnancy class at the hospital and wanted to know if I'd like to go together. I said, thank you but I think my husband will go with me. There's still a part of me that gets a spike when I see her name on my phone. I think that will take time to fade if it ever does. I know what she did and I know what it did to my head.

I also know she confessed. She could have kept quiet and said the soup was just soup and we would never know. That doesn't erase what happened. It adds context. I'm letting both things exist. I keep my rules. I keep checking in with myself. When I feel my chest tighten, I pause and I step back. Update, a few months and some days passed and now I'm writing this last part with a baby asleep on my chest. This is messy to type because I need one hand and I keep dropping the phone. Birth was earlier than the date they gave me, but within the window doctors said was fine. The labor started at night. We went to the hospital.

I won't go into details. What matters is the baby cried and then slept and then cried again and fed and looked at me with that new face that doesn't look like anyone yet. The pediatrician said he looks okay. I keep wanting to use big words, but I won't. He eats. He sleeps. He makes sounds. He grabs my finger. I can't think beyond that most hours. We told family and my husband sent his mom a message from the hospital. She replied with a short line and a photo of a candle she lit for us. I know some people will roll their eyes at that, but it felt like our way without pushing in. When we got home, we made a plan for visits. Short,

holding the baby. If anyone feels off, wash hands, no kissing masks. If there's any sniffles, bring food only if we asked. And it had to be from a place we know. She came over with my husband's aunt. The first time she put her purse down and asked if she should wash her hands. And I said, yes, she didn't reach for the baby until I offered. She cried a little bit when she held him and said, thank you. She didn't say anything about how I look or what I should eat or how does she looked around like she wanted to arrange something and then she sat back down. She started doing small tasks without comment. She asked if she could fold laundry and I said, sure. She washed some dishes. She wiped the counter. We picked a name for the baby that is a

version of my husband's dad's name. We didn't tell her in advance. We told her when she came over and I saw her face do a thing I've only seen on him when something hits hard. She said, thank you. She touched the baby's head and said his dad would be proud. I'm typing this and I can feel my own eyes sting a bit, but I'm not going to get into that because then I'll start crying on the baby and he will wake up. People keep asking if I forgave her. I don't know how to answer.

I think in Internet posts, it's always a yes or no. In this house, it feels like a series of small, choices every day. She hasn't crossed a line since dinner. That matters. She handed over the key. That matters. She stopped the daily messages. That matters. She learned and she is using what she learned in ways I can see. That matters. The soup happened. Three days in the hospital happened. I don't forget. I'm not telling myself a story where that was a blessing in disguise. or some lesson from the universe. It was a thing that could have gone way worse

and I don't want to minimize that. I'm noting it and still moving through my day with this baby who needs food and sleep and clean clothes and doesn't care about Facebook groups. Both sets of grandparents are coming by in a way that works for us. My mom is here twice a week and cooks big pots that I can freeze, and she asks before she touches anything in the kitchen. She texts me a list and I pick.

My husband's mom checks the group chat and covers a shift when we ask, usually late afternoon so I can nap. Sometimes she holds the baby while I shower and I can hear her humming from the bathroom. She asked me if I'm okay with that and I said yes and then I listened for words like back in my day and they didn't come. She holds, she pats, she hands him back when he fusses and says mom is the boss in a way that doesn't feel like a dig. We're keeping visits short. When she leaves she sends a text saying, thank you for letting me spend time and that she's heading home. That's it. No notes about what I should have done. I know some will think I'm painting a neat arc. I'm not trying to do that. I'm tired most of the time and my brain is a

mess of feeding times and burp cloths and laundry that never ends. I don't have space to hold on to anger every hour. I also don't have space for drama. If she had pushed one more time, I would be done. If she does in the future, I'll be done. I can do both love and limits. I keep saying that to myself in the middle of the night when the baby wakes and my thoughts start spinning. Love and limits. I'm making it a rule for everyone around me, including me. Someone will ask if we ever reported the powder.

The hospital sent samples for testing but told me results can take a while and may not give a full list. I signed what they gave me. I asked if I should do anything else and they said if I ever find out what exact product it was, report to the food agency. I don't have that info. The account blocked her and then vanished. My husband looked for it and couldn't find it. His mom says she knows she got scammed and feels shame and that's her work to do.

I'm not in charge of her lesson. I'm in charge of who gets access to me and the baby. If you're reading this to decide verdicts, I can't tell you what to say. I came here at first to ask Ida because my brain needed a yes or no. I think what I wanted was confirmation that it's okay to cut contact even when the person says nice things and smiles while doing harmful things. I cut contact. Then I tested small steps.

I'm still testing. I don't feel like an asshole for that. I feel like a person who went through a thing and is trying to move forward without pretending it didn't happen. Right now the baby is making this snuffling sound. that means he will wake up in a minute, so I'm going to wrap this up. I wanted to put the whole thing in one thread instead of posting multiple times because I don't have the energy to keep answering. If more happens I'll add it here.

For now, we are home, we are okay, we are figuring it out, we have people around us who are learning how to be around us in a way that helps rather than hurts. I can live with that. And because I know some will ask about how my husband is with all of this. He's here. He took time off when the baby came and he gets up for the first diaper change and then again later and he stands between me and any person who tries to pull focus. He used to hesitate with his mom, now he doesn't.

He told her the rules. He keeps the rules with me if I start to bend them out of guilt. Last small thing. We named the baby after a version of his dad's name and I can see the way it changed something in the room during visits, like it pulled some of the tension out of the air. I don't want to read meaning into everything, but I will say it made some talks easier because it felt like we were all on the same side for a moment. I'll take moments like that when they come, as long as no one pays for them with their health. I hope you enjoy this story. Mother became fixated on government affairs and engaged in a deep connection with a man through the internet,

then warned of unfairly blaming my father for a false accusation, when he refused to cover her online expenses. after their divorce. I, 16M, have always been, or at least was, very close to my mother, I always knew that if I needed help, she would be there for me, regardless of what it was, my dad, 52M, on the other hand, though we loved each other, and still do, wasn't as involved in my personal life as much, usually having to know how I was feeling through my mom. This, however, changed some months ago. Around January, my mom started to obsess with politics and Twitter, not U.S. politics, as I don't live there, spending more and more time on the side arguing with strangers and being on the phone with some of the friends she made there.

As time went on, she slowly started to isolate herself from her family and friends, closing herself in her room barely speaking with my dad and I, the relationship between my parents. hasn't been the best for the last three years, because of different reasons, they became distant and rarely talked, at times it seemed as if they were just roommates sharing a house and talking only when it was necessary. Between her and I, though, there have never been any problems, some occasional arguing, sure, but nothing serious, so it really hurt to see how she pushed me out of her life. This went on for some months, until recently, about a month ago, by accident, I heard how she told one of her friends things like I love you honey and I don't know what I would do without you. I exploded, I screamed at her, without insulting or being threatening.

That said, I'm not proud of what I did and have already apologized for losing my temper and started to cry, I felt betrayed, and felt horrible for my dad, though in the end he didn't take it too badly since he kind of expected it. She kept telling me how this guy gave her the attention that she lacked at home, and how it wasn't cheating because they didn't have sex, it would have been pretty difficult since the guy literally lives in another island. I won't say where I'm from but know that most of the country is in Europe, but it owns a bunch of islands in the Atlantic, I told her that her excuses were stupid and to stop trying to justify her actions, and then my father came home, he found me almost having an anxiety attack, and after calming a bit told him everything. To sum up, they agreed to a friendly divorce and everything was as fine as it could be. Or at least it was until a week ago, when because of a stupid thing, she wanted him to pay for the internet in the house, even if he didn't live there, my mother started to scream at my dad, telling him that she was fed up, that he always did the same and that he was manipulating me

to hate her, when in fact, it was quite the opposite. She said some really awful things, threatened to falsely accuse him of domestic abuse, go to court to get my full custody and even pushed me because I was supposedly about to hit her, even though I would never dare to even think to hurt her. After a lot of screaming I had a full-on anxiety attack, I started wailing while she just kept telling me, look what your father is doing to you, if he just paid, none of this would have even happened and if you love him so much, leave with him, but in the end you will understand that I'm right.

Needless to say, I was a mess, I had never seen her act in such a way, and it hurt me a lot. We called my grandma and she asked me to give her a hug before going to sleep even if what she said was that bad, and so I did, not because I wanted to forgive her, but because my grandma would calm a bit. But to add insult to injury, before even apologizing, which she didn't do at that moment, one of the first things she said was that I should stop insulting the guy she found on Twitter because he respects me and my father a lot, to which I said whatever, but again, it hurt that, even after all the things that happened that day, the first thing she could think of was that I insulted her boyfriend to whom I think, oh, no respect, someone trying to date a married person,

because he knew she was. Married, doesn't deserve to be treated with respect if you ask me. And here I am, a week after this incident and still a mess, she has apologized for most of what she said, and has started to be really affectionate, giving me hugs and trying to talk to me more often, but I just can't see her in the same way as before, and she isn't even trying to change her behavior that much. She still spends way too much time on Twitter, and I don't know what to do, I don't think I want to cut her off. But every time I see her I get in a bad mood and just want to go outside. To take a walk or meet up with my friends so that I can relax and think about other stuff. So what should I do? My dad and the rest of my family are encouraging me to value her efforts to recover

our old relationship, but I don't know if I will be able to, or at least if I even want to leave this behind. Comments where Ope has replied, comment one, if it were me, I try to live with your dad. Even if you're not as close, I'd say he comes off fairly well in this story. Oop, I didn't make it clear in the post but now my dad and I are really close, when I began to feel sidelined he was there to help me and I value that a lot. Comment two, be careful with how she tries to rebuild the relationship. She's obviously very manipulative and willing to lie to hurt others when she doesn't get her way. She may be blanketing you in affection to try and make you feel guilty and come to her side and poison you towards your dad.

If her affection is like this, it will be gone the next time you stand up for yourself or your dad. When that happens, remember that family is about helping when it's hard, not giving love when it's easy. Typically, the parent who deals with the divorce more responsibly and amicably is going to be the that you should look to for guidance and that does not seem to be her. Boop, I wouldn't say manipulate, but she's trying to play the let's leave everything behind card, which I'm not buying. Boop responds to a comment about guilt-tripping. Thank you for the advice, and I'm sorry to hear what you went through. My mom is kind of doing the same in some aspects. She has tried to guilt-trip me telling me

how she had to leave her job and her friends to take care of me, I was a very sickly child and had to go regularly to the hospital because of it. But it makes no sense because it hasn't been like that for the last eight years, and has also talked shit about my dad and his, well, it's mine too, family, who she hates while also saying how she loves him but just not in a romantic way. Comment three, you don't have to save this. As much as it sucks, our parents are just people. They are stupid and make mistakes and have crazy thoughts and make bad decisions.

They are absolutely no different than any of our friends. At 16, you are very nearly as mature as many, many parents no matter what their age. You have values and knowledge of right and wrong. So yes, you can absolutely choose to judge what your parents do, and you can absolutely choose to not forgive them at any time. Before you choose to do this, try to look at your mother and your parents as an outsider, not as their child. Your mother has had an emotional affair.

And some people see that as cheating and some just see it as a horrible warning. Your parents have decided to divorce for this, you cannot fix it or go back. You will have to decide how to go forward, but their relationship is their problem, just as it would be for your friends. You are going to have to get through this and somehow live with it. At 16, you still have to have parents. Try not to take this on as your problem. Look at her as a troubled person that has made bad decisions. You don't have to like those decisions or forgive them, but you cannot let them affect your every moment.

OOP, I have learned that the hard way, since the moment I discovered that things between them were going south, I tried to act as a mediator between the two, which only hurt me in the long run because, you know, I was like 13 at the time, and a kid shouldn't have to worry about these things, but still I chose to, despite my dad telling me not to. OOP responds to a longer comment about boundaries when it comes to his parents' relationship. It was usually my mother who told me what was going on, my dad tried to not get me involved, usually telling me to not worry, that this is not something I should be worrying about at this age,

and asking my mom to stop telling me about this kind of things, that they are adults and I am, was, a kid, so it was them who should figure things out. I won't lie though, and whenever the chance presented itself, I would snoop around and try to hear what they were saying, even if it was none of my business, now I understand that it was wrong, but at the time I just couldn't stop myself from doing it. And I hope that my dad isn't crazy, from what I've seen it doesn't seem likely, he always acts calmly and in an objective, responsible way, but you never know. Update, so, uh, hi. I posted here nearly six years ago about how sort of strained my relationship with my mother had become after she closed herself off from both me and my father because of her obsession with politics, again, not going to get into it. A lot of stuff has happened since then, so I figured I could make an update. I debated for a while if I should

even make this update since, after all, it's been half a decade since I made the original post and it didn't even get that much attention. In the end, though, I think it will give me a bit of closure which has been difficult to find otherwise. Oh, and again, English is not my first language yada yada sorry for any mistakes. For starters, I ended up moving out permanently from my mother's house not long after I posted. We had a couple big arguments about her behavior in which she kept insisting that she had done nothing wrong and I should not be upset at her. I tried using some of the recommendations I got from people here, some of which were.

Questionable, to say the least, such as setting some of clear boundaries with her, but nothing really worked. The straw that broke the camel's back, though, was when she told me that my uncles, her brothers, cancer had come back only as a way to hurt me since she didn't mention it before to avoid causing me even more stress. She kept that information in her back pocket until I pissed her off enough to want to hurt me, so yeah, really nice of her. As I mentioned before I moved out, and I ended up living with my dad and my grandma a couple towns over. By then I was getting to the same. getting close to turning 18 so there wasn't much she could do to stop me, and to her credit,

she didn't. After that last incident I pretty much cut her off, and it has stayed that way up until now with a couple exceptions. The main one being that my grandfather ended up passing away in 2022, so I re-established contact with her partly as a way to try to make my other, grandmother happy after, you know, her husband died, and partly because in a way I did miss her. as you might guess it did not work out. At first thing seemed to be going slightly better than last time, since she didn't push as hard for my affection and seemed more respectful of my boundaries. That was until Christmas of that same year, when she told me that she was going to commit suicide once her mother died since there was nobody in the world who loved her, not so subtly implying that it was my fault. That obviously shook me, but more than that it made me angry.

I realized that it was most likely a bluff to guilt me into forgiving her for everything, and that even if it wasn't, it was not a burden I should have to carry on my back, so I cut her off again, this time for good. Other than that and for me personally, these years have been a bit of a roller coaster, with quite a few highs and lows. I finished high school, got into college, gained 40 kilograms, lost 25 of them, got really depressed, slowly crawled out of it, made some new friends, lost. some old ones. Right now though I'd say that I'm better than ever. I turned 22 a few months ago,

and for the first time in a while I look forward to the future. I just graduated from college, I'm officially a historian now, I already got into the master's I want to do, I have a pretty chill job, and next year I'm planning on staying for a few months in Belgium, thanks to a EU program. Things are not perfect, of course, but I have a strong support system which has helped me not completely fall apart these last few years. My dad in particular has been my rock all this time and our bond is stronger than ever. Even though him and I are very different, and he didn't always know how to help me, he really gave it his all and I couldn't be more thankful. So yeah, these, almost, six years have not been easy, but I feel like I have come out on the other side happier

and stronger. Thanks again to the people who gave advice last time, and have a good one. Comment where O.P. has replied, comment, I'm glad to hear you're doing, relatively, well, and congratulations on the college graduation and master's admission. You may want to check out for more support, even if your mother isn't diagnosed narcissist. We help people with lots of situations of self-centered parents who don't support or even undermine their children, whether minors or adult children. Oh, O. O.P., thank you. And I have already lurked there from time to time, but I always felt that my experience was somewhat different from what people usually post there. I don't really know how to put it into words, but I have always felt that the awful things that my mom did slash said to me did not

come from a person who thought she was the center of the world, but rather someone who was fundamentally broken, and who instead of seeking help and trying to improve would rather lash out and hurt those around her once they eventually got fed up with her antics. Still, thank you for the recommendation, I think it's great that support groups like this one exist. spent my entire childhood to raise my sister after our parents failed us, but when I lost my job and became homeless, she refused to let me stay with her for even a few weeks, so I cut her off completely. My sister, 26F, from a young age has that only one person to rely on and that person was

me, 29M. We come from a broken family with one parent that was only around till I was five and the other who was stuck in a cycle of addiction. of our situation I grew up very quickly and shielded her from as much as I could, she obviously was aware of what was going on but she was not in the crosshair. I started with stealing from our mother to make sure we had food and bills were paid, I got a part-time job at 13 because we couldn't rely on our mother and when I graduated I immediately got two jobs and we moved out.

I had to push my sister through high school, she wasn't an easy teen for obvious reasons, on top of going month to month trying to get as much money together to pay our bills. At 19 she finally graduated after being held back a year, she changed her tune a lot and she started working as well and had her own place when she was 21. I finally got a shot to do something for myself and got a degree, as a result I got a much better job but unfortunately that was right before the pandemic hit so I pretty much went from hired to fired as I was a new hire. Now the reason I am saying all that is not to pat myself on the back but to stress why my reaction is the way it is. I was out of work, on the brink of losing my apartment and only had one person who I expected I could turn to, my sister. She was recently married, lived, still lives obviously, with her husband, so I asked if I could

stay a few weeks at most a few months until I got a new job, it was a no. I was taken aback, but it remained to be a no. A week or two later I was kicked out of my apartment, I asked again and it was a no. At this point I am homeless and the only reason I didn't end up sleeping on the damn street was because I could crash at a few friends until I got a temporary job, I rented a room with a bunch of roommates for a while, eventually got a job in my field again and am now doing fine. That said, I have not spoken to my sister since, she has called, messaged, banged on my door, sent crying voice messages, apologized dozens of times, tried to explain herself, tried going to my job, tried going to friends, every day. I haven't said a word to her. It's been over a year now, she recently had a child and she is still desperately trying to reach out. She claims her husband refused to let me stay, he even reached out several times to beg me to reach out, but to me the one time I need her she basically tells me

to F myself, I feel like it was the last push I needed to just end that chapter of my life. I feel bad but just, not bad enough, I guess. Even my friends and my girlfriend are on my case that I should forgive her and that they understood it at first but now think I am being an asshole, what would you guys do? Update, so I had a huge amount of people inquiring as to what ended up happening and asking me to make an update should anything happen and while I wasn't sure if I would or even should I eventually decided to just go ahead and do it. Let me start by apologizing to the people who commented on my post. I made my post and it didn't seem to gain much traction at all so I more or less stopped looking at it for about a day

I think only to figure out the next day that I had gotten a lot of comments. Unfortunately, when I decided to reply to a lot of the comments I had been reading, I realized that this subredit locks the comments after a certain amount of comments have been made or karma has been reached, I am afraid I was not aware of this admittedly very odd rule, so that's on me. I did end up reading most comments and would like to thank everyone offering advice or just saying something supportive. First to answer a couple of questions that I was unable to answer along with addressing some incorrect comments in the previous post yet I saw asked quite a few times. 1. The first few noes were without reasonable explanation. I was not aware of her given reason that her husband was not okay with it until later.

2. She did not know she was pregnant when she declined and most of it happened before she would have even been pregnant in the first place. I mean most of this took place over a year ago, I even put that in the post so I am not sure how that math would even work. 3. I am not an anti-vaxxer or dirty or something. There were quite a few comments that theorized this would be the case for her refusal. I got my two vaccination shots the moment I could them in well while my personal hygiene is not exactly anyone's business I shower once a day in my apartment is spotless. 4. A lot of advice and comments seem to be from the perspective of functional families with a functional family structure. That is not the case here. The primary reason I am so gutted about this entire situation is exactly that, This isn't a case of, well, I don't want my cousin to stay in my house. He can stay somewhere else.

This is a case of me having sacrificed my entire youth and a significant portion of my early adult life for someone that I played no part in creating or have any parental responsibility for and the first and only time I ever asked her to do something for me is the only person I could reasonable fall back on and her not doing that. That's more than a familial spat, that is a straight-up betrayal. That's also an answer to the people saying that she owes me nothing because I chose to be a parent. Anyway, with that out of the way, I decided to follow some advice given by several people. I told my girlfriend and the friends who involved themselves or were involved by my sister to back off or to lose my number, they do not understand my

perspective and they likely never will and I need to get that through my head as I have a tendency to talk about my life as if it is a standard, but it is a standard only to me, luckily most people don't go through any of that. I obviously had a longer and face-to-face conversation with my GF and with individual close friends but it boils down to that. One friend kept pestering me about it and I ended up dropping him as a friend but my GF was apologetic and most friends were either apologetic or said they'd drop it. I ended up writing a long email to my sister and while I will not copy and paste the entire thing here as it contains a lot of personal information and far more horrible stuff that I am unsure will even be allowed on a sub like this, it more or less

boiled down to me explaining to her how her refusal to take me in for what ended up being a few weeks made me feel and I detailed a long list of things I had done to take care of her. I ended up finishing my email telling her that even if I take her version of the story as truth and her husband as the cause of me not being allowed to stay that it is entirely irrelevant to me because that just means she didn't fight for me at all. I also informed her I have no interest in meeting her child as of this moment and I have no interest in reconnecting with her and if that changes in the future I will be the one to contact her, I told her to let this be a lesson to her as it has been a painful lesson to me. Boiled down I have decided to move on and keep the door on the tiniest of cracks. She has responded a lot since that moment.

She seems unable to accept it, but I have not responded since. I don't have anything else to tell you I am afraid and since the sub only allows one update well it is what it is. Again, thank you all for taking the time to respond to my post and thank you all for your insightful replies. I hope you enjoy this story. My father's second wife compelled him to enroll me in a residential school when I was 10 so she could begin anew with her own children. Now, eight years later, he unexpectedly wishes for my return. home even though his wife still hates me and tells my siblings not to talk to me. Okay. So I've been attending boarding school since I was 10, I started the fifth grade at my boarding school.

The reason why I started going so early is that my dad remarried, my mother cailed herself when I was a baby, to my stepmom when I was nine. When she got pregnant with my brother, she insisted that I be sent to boarding school so that they could start start afresh. I use quotes because I used to hear them talking about it when I still live there, I actually heard the discussions they'd have at night about it when they thought I was sleeping. She said a lot of hurtful things then, about me potentially being like my mother and potentially being a bad influence on their future children, but I guess she convinced him because he gave in, and they sent me away. So I went to boarding school, they had my brother and then my sister, and I only see them in the summers and some holidays. In fact, a lot of holidays I spend with my

friends' families, which my father has always signed off on. This especially confuses me considering his change of heart this summer. I mean, I've spent the last four Thanksgiving's holidays in other people's houses without comment. At first I was extremely depressed. I was really attached to my father as a kid and it took me a long time to deal with being sent away, especially when my siblings were born. I felt a lot of betrayal and resentment. But then I grew to deal with it. What really helped and still helps, is that I have a wonderful group of friends at school and the adults there are really supportive there. My closest two friends have been there since I've been there.

I feel like they're my family. Also, a lot of the kids I go to school with deal with what I'm dealing with in some form or the other and this has given my a lot of perspective. Additionally, and I am really grateful for this and understand that in a lot of ways I've been given an amazing opportunity and have nothing to complain about in this respect, I go to a really nice school. I love the grounds, I love my classes, I love the extracurriculars, I love my teachers, and I love my friends. The picture people paint of boarding school isn't the one that I experience. It's pretty easy for me to say that I prefer being at school 100x more than I prefer being at my

father and stepmom's home. When I'm in their home, I feel like an outsider. They do their thing and I do mine. It's especially awful though because I still get the sense that my stepmother doesn't want me around when I'm here. She barely acknowledges me and I know she influences my brother and sister not to interact with me. I know because I took them to a theme park two weeks back and they told me this after a full day of having fun with each other. So, and as much as I appreciate that I get to have the experiences I do at school, I can't seem to distance myself from my distaste of my father and stepmom. So, in order to avoid being disrespectful or coming off as rude, I just tried to minimize the time I spend with them when I'm in their home for

the summer. I don't have any friends here, so this means I go on hikes, go on runs, go to the movies, whatever I can to just be active or out and about without getting into trouble. Which brings me to the problem. My father kind of blindsided me yesterday. He sat down with me while I was eating breakfast, which never happens, before going on a hike and he told me he's concerned that I haven't wanted to spend time with the family. I was confused because I haven't ever perceived this need from him, nor any space for it. He works all year round and all day. My stepmother is always ferrying my brother and sister to something or off with her friends. I just didn't even think that they wanted that. He then said that he wants to keep me here for my final two years of high school

and enroll me in the nearby private school so that I can be with the family. And I just panicked. I get stellar grades and I'm doing well at school. Every report he's got. He's got. He's gotten has been good. I expressed this to him, but I was so distraught at the idea of not going back that the insisted my distress was an indication of how unattached from the family I was. I know I could have handled it better, but I blew up at him after he said this. I told him he was the reason I wasn't attached to family and that removing me from school would only remove me from the one place I had any real family. This really made him angry and he left saying he was resolved to remove me. I don't know what to do.

How can I convince him to let me go back? I feel like I'm a kid again. It's the same feeling all over again and I'm so angry comments where OP has replied. Comment 1, I suspect that once your stepmother learns what your father has said that she will convince him to change his mind. Comment 2, the stepmother might actually be a good last resort strategy here. If you try the letter writing or having a friend's parent slash a teacher talk to your father and he doesn't change his mind, then you've got nothing to lose in trying to enlist your

stepmother to convince him. For her own selfish reasons, it sounds like she would agree you should go back to the school and she is probably the person most likely to influence your father. Oh, O. P. Oh God, I really hope so. Comment three, you need to be honest with him. He'll be shocked and deny it, but if you're honest, he'll understand. You need to tell him you heard when you attend the reason you were shipped to boarding school is so that his family could start afresh. At the time you resented it, being displaced, but you found what you were. what you were missing at home, acceptance. You are now thriving at school with friends who willingly and wanting have you over for Thanksgiving.

You don't feel the same at his house. You feel like an intruder, not a true member of the family. Even your brother and sister admitted that your stepmother instructed them to treat you this way. Then you drop the truth bombshell. You will always resent him for picking his new family over you, but you will resent him even more if he displaces you from the only place where you felt welcome. This conversation will not be easy, so feel free to write it as a letter instead. You are 15, you don't get to call the shots, but you're old enough to demand your opinions be heard.

Your father is an absentee parent, he needs to learn the truth. Oh, O-op, I really like the idea of writing a letter. I'm going to clear my head and get started on writing it so I can deliver it to him as soon as possible. I really appreciate this feedback. Thanks. When asked if the reason that you're saying, the father wants OOP closer to home at a local school is for financial reasons I'm not sure. It doesn't appear as if there are money problems. I know that my tuition is very expensive,

but based off the family's lifestyle, it seems like nothing. I don't know if I'm being naive with this assumption, though. I don't want to be too detailed for the sake of anonymity, but I know he works in a field and for a company that makes what a lot of people consider problematic amounts of money. I don't know if anything has changed for him. It's just never a thing he's discussed with me and I've never asked him about his money. Update 1. I've been silent since the first few responses because I wanted to process all the suggestions coming my way. First, thank you so much for your concern and kindness. It really helped me sit down and think more calmly about this situation.

Second, I decided to write an email to my father, in which I apologized for my outburst, expressed my understanding that we should develop a better relationship and my want for one as well. I don't know if I really want this TBAH, but based on feedback, it seems smart to include this, and my belief that pulling me out of my school would not result in that goal. I offered alternatives, like FaceTiming regularly and more consistent visits during the holidays, like Thanksgiving. I also suggested that maybe we should do something together during this holiday so that we could talk and catch up. We used to hike a lot together when I was a kid and I suggested that we go on one together, like this weekend. I also explained that I feel I've been a responsible and productive student at the boarding school, pointing out that I head the Diversity Club, have provided peer tutoring each year since eighth grade, and have maintained a good GPA, and that disrupting my schooling might be counterproductive.

I explained that my outburst was due to these details, rather than my not wanting to be closer to him. I closed out saying I know he wants what's best for me, I hope this is true and I'll choose to believe it, and I want to work with him to make that happen. So now I'm waiting for his reply. I'm pretty anxious because I honestly don't know how he'll reply. I'm taking advice given to me here, though, and trying to make plans in my mind for any response. I haven't told any of my friends yet because I know they'll tell their parents, who may contact him, and I can't be sure how he'll react to that.

If he refuses after my email, maybe I'll try to have an adult intervene. I'm still thinking it through. Anyway, thank you guys again. It's nice to know there are nice people all over. Update 2, he responded. Op, when we spoke I told you I had made my decision. That stance has not changed and I am disappointed that you have chosen to ignore my words. Do not forget that you are still a child under my care, despite what you may feel.

One day you will see the wisdom in this and be thankful. I am currently on May My Out on business and will be back on Saturday. Until I return and am able to speak in person, I do not want to hear or read another word about this issue. I want to contact my headmaster and dorm parent. I have good relationships with them, but now I really feel if they contact him that will be the end of it. I think I fucked this up. I shouldn't have sent that email, I should have waited. I don't know.

My friend's parents are all pretty influential slash well-known in my dad and stepmom's social circle and I'm worried it will humiliate my dad slash stepmom if they find out about this issue or try to intervene. I feel does so paralyzed. Update 3, I'm going back to school. A lot has happened in a short period of time. I don't think I dealt with my father's email in the smartest way, but it worked. Advice telling me to speak to my stepmom really stuck with me. I felt so desperate that I spoke to my stepmom about the situation.

It became very obvious very quickly. that she had no clue that my father had wanted this. She immediately left the room after I explained the situation. I could hear her arguing with him saying it was a deal-breaker and that she wouldn't have it. He called me soon after she hung up and sounded so very angry. He said it was clear I had made up my mind and didn't want to be part of the family. He said that he had wanted time to let my stepmother know and wishes I had trusted him. I didn't even know how to start explaining why I feel his view of my feelings are so wrong.

before he told me that since I didn't even want to try working with him he's sending me back. He ended the call saying I hope you can deal with the consequences of your choices. I'm angry at him because I feel like so much of this is miscommunication on his part, but I'm happy more than anything because I get to go back. Thank God. I'm going to lay low, be as nice to everyone as possible, and try to ride this out until school starts, which is soon. I'm so relieved. Next story, best friend used her work computer to look up my private health insurance information without permission and sent a photo through messages to her controlling boyfriend, so I blocked her for the HIPAA violation. I, 23F, blocked my longtime friend Alice, 23F, of 10 years after she used her work computer to look up my health insurance information without my consent. The worst part is she took a photo of it, sent it through messages which her boyfriend of one year has access to.

Some context from my POV, her boyfriend is leaching off of her. She spent thousands of dollars on dates, including a motorcycle that was impounded by police because he didn't bother getting his license or permit. He has used her credit card to buy drugs, has driven her car while intoxicated, and uses everything she owns, including her laptop that he uses to read all of her private conversations. I fear he is isolating her from everyone around her and it's working. When I saw the photo, she laughed it off, and I was scared but pissed. I asked her why she would do that and she said she was just curious. I asked her how stupid she could be, not knowing what Hippa was if she works at a doctor's clinic. She never responded

and left me on Reed, I assumed to run to our other friend Bella. No real apology or accountability. After two weeks, I blocked her. I confided in Bella and Cassidy. I confided in Bella and about the situation. Cassie was incredibly understanding, not understanding what possessed Alice to do this. Bella, on the other hand, loves to play devil's advocate and has always had animosity towards me. Bella said that Alice only had good intentions and that she was only being playful and trying to connect with me as a friend. I found BS and explained that if Alice wanted to connect with me, she could have been an adult and communicated with me, asking for permission before risking her job, committing a HIPAA violation and possibly leaking my information.

I told Bella, what if my SSN was on there? What if Alice's boyfriend saw it as an opportunity to take credit cards out of my name? Days pass, Bella wants to hang out. I agree, but informed her that I had blocked Alice and that we were no longer friends. I told her that she and Cassie were welcome to stay friends with Alice, but that I want to hang out separately. Bella leaves me on Reed and doesn't reply for days. When she does, she responds along the lines of, I'm sorry that I hurt you but that if you didn't want my opinion, you should have said so and next time, I'll keep it to myself. It's clear we both have very different

opinions about things. IDK, it felt like she was pushing the blame back to me instead of taking accountability. This week, Cassie and I were supposed to hang out. She flaked the first day, claiming she took an extra shift but then ghosted me completely the second time. After a few days, she apologized and asked if I'm free this weekend. I said, depends, have you heard from Bella? She replied, yeah, I went out with her yesterday, why? Did you want to do something with all of us together? I realized that Bella, who mentioned in her apology text that Cassie mentioned a jewelry stand and that we should all go, had gone with Cassie to that same stand the day Cassie and I were supposed to hang out. After Bella dropped Cassie off, she texted me with the apology message.

I've been trying to spend time with both only to be ghosted and left behind. I feel like they use the opportunity to discuss things behind my back. Now, I feel like I'm being iced out. I'm starting to feel like they're planning some intervention slash ambush to get me to forgive Alice. The trust is gone and I feel hurt. I've tried being honest and setting boundaries, but now I'm wondering if I'm being excluded for standing up for myself. Now I'm wondering, Ida for blocking Alice over this? And Wipta if I distanced myself from Bella and Cassie too? Any thoughts? Update, I apologize for taking so long,

but I have an update. Also sorry in advance for the long post. There were a lot of questions, so here's some clarification. Update will be down below. Why did she look up my information and take a photo. I've been dealing with health issues that are progressively getting worse and I have no answers and had no decent doctor. I think she took it upon herself to try and help by looking up my health insurance information. When asked why, she texted she was curious. I know she had good intentions, but I never gave her permission to look up my info or take a photo. If Alice had just asked me, I would have said no since I didn't want her jeopardizing her job. But also, if she would have only asked me, I would have let her know that I had already found a new doctor. Who did she send

the photo to? As far as I know, just me. But her boyfriend uses her laptop and basically everything she owns. I believe he's read our conversations, which I had no clue until he brought up my health concerns that I confided in Alice and has also sent me a few messages not clarifying it was him. So there was a very real possibility he saw the photo. More info, my SSN was not. not in the photo. I only said, what if it was? If it was, it would have been more serious. My name, address, birthday, and health insurance information was on there. Now for the update, after posting, I filed an official HIPAA complaint through the OCR website after many comments suggested it. I also reflected on this friend group and realized we had all been drifting

apart for some time now, even before the incident, Alice and I were growing apart. Bella started showing more signs of animosity and resentment here and there. But Cassie? We were actually growing closer so when she started ghosting me, I was left hurt and confused. Later, Bella sent me a text inviting me to a group hangout with some of her friends, including Cassie but not Alice. I assumed this was an intervention disguised as a hangout to maybe mend things between Alice, but I can't be for certain. I replied that while I appreciated the thought, I was not comfortable hanging out and and did not like how some things were handled or said, especially since Bella tried shifting

the blame to me when she texted me an apology beforehand. I also said that I needed space to re-evaluate some things, but I told her to have fun and to stay safe. She replied, wishing me the best, but if I needed anything she was going to be waiting for me while respecting my need for space. I haven't reached out since, but I've been thinking about it. Weeks passed and I was still stuck up on the situation. My sill got tired and finally asked me why I couldn't let it go. After taking some time to reflect on the reasons and my choices, I put my big girl pants on and made the decision to call. I called, got connected to the manager and explained what happened. I offered to email the screenshots and because of the small size of the clinic, they had to

create a completely new email so I could send everything. The next day, I received an email explaining that the clinic would be starting their investigation days earlier than they initially said. Days passed, and I received a conclusion email giving me their thanks for having the courage to report on what they did. They put Alice on leave, and reviewed the logs for several days. They brought her in for an HR meeting and decided on training Alice with some HIPAA training and are putting in measures so that this will never happen again. I'm sure this is not the update many expected or hoped for. I did what many recommended, but the decision was ultimately up to the clinic. I hope this was a wake-up call for Alice. I haven't heard anything from Alice,

Bella, and Cassie since. My thoughts are that Alice made a stupid and careless mistake that nearly costed her job and ended our friendship. She's always had the habit of making careless mistakes without thinking or caring about the consequences until they came. As for her boyfriend, I don't know him that well, but I've seen red flags he's presented in person and from what Alice has told me. For why, I didn't tell her, she's the type to not listen slash make excuses about her relationship. Besides, I wouldn't be the first friend to drop her because of her behavior once she started dating her boyfriend. I also want to briefly say that when writing my original post, it was 4 a.m.

and I was shaking with anxiety at the realization that I just lost my closest friends of a decade. I regret how messy it sounded with more gossip and ranting than actual facts of what happened and I apologize for that. I hope that this update shows that I actually took time to process things and approach it with more maturity than my first one. Thank you everyone who responded to my original post with advice, support, and even criticism. I think the blunt comments calling me a doormat were the most helpful in helping me reflect about everything. I know it took me some time, but in the end, I called and got some closure. I think this whole situation pushed me to improve myself for the better, not just as a person, but to be a better friend.

to the future friends I'll meet. Thanks for reading, and at this moment, it will probably be my only update unless something significant happens. Comment where OP has replied, comment, you did right by reporting the HIPAA violation. You were also right in realizing your friends were really no longer real friends anymore. You're at an age where big life changes happen and old friends often go by the wayside as we come to find others that are more closely aligned with where we see ourselves in the big scheme of things.

You'll be fine. Keep the good memories and just let those women go their own ways. Oh, O. O.P., thank you for this. It was hard since I knew them for so long, but I saw the signs but didn't want to admit it to myself that we were all growing apart. I hope you enjoy this story. My parent deserted me and my younger sibling while she frequented nightclubs every evening following her separation. Subsequently, during my gathering to celebrate the impending arrival of my child, she informed the guests that she faced challenges in nurturing us. Two kids alone, so I called her BS out in front of everyone. I got a throwaway

because people in my life use Reddit and I do not want this tied to my main. I will keep this clear without fancy breaks or cute headers because I wanted to read like the posts I see here where people lay out facts and ask for judgment or advice. I was six when my parents divorced, and the way time got split after that set the track for everything that followed. My father handled bills, school paperwork, pickups and drop-offs, and kept steady routines. I spent a lot of time with him that looked like schoolwork, sports practice, grocery runs, laundry, and meals that got cooked and eaten and cleaned without speeches. My mother said the divorce broke her because my father had an affair, and she said she needed space and time for herself and friends. She said she would

not sit home alone and that she deserved a life. When I stayed with her, the evening pattern was that she would head out and I would keep an eye on my brother, who was four years younger. I would run through a list of what he needed for the next day, move laundry from washer to dryer, set out clothes, make food, check his backpack and my own. By the time I was 14, I did not have to be told to do any of it because there was no one else in the apartment who was going to run that checklist. My brother was 10 and needed rides, forms, signatures, lunches, clean clothes, and someone to make sure he actually slept at night. Our mother would text from bars and say she was coming back soon,

then send another text later, then nothing. I learned not to wait up for her because waiting up meant starting the next morning with no sleep and then taking a test or going to practice and trying to hold my focus while my head felt like it was full of static. So I set alarms, built routines, watched the gate, and wrote down bus numbers, phone numbers, due dates, locker combos, and notes about when the field trip money had to be in, by and when the clinic in town was open for walk-ins. My father did not trash our mother and he did

not involve me in his feelings about what she was doing. I did not tell him many details about nights at her place because I knew if he tried to take action through court, the schedule might not change and we would have to keep doing those exchanges while they fought. I did not want to be in the middle of a fresh war. He paid support, showed up, and asked if we were okay. I said we were because that answer kept the piece and let me keep control of the plan I had built. If people wonder where other adults and our family were during those years, I can say they were around but not in a position to change the setup because the custody order said what it said and because my mother told them she had it handled,

and because I was the one handling things, and no one wanted to pull the thread that might unravel the small stability that my plan created. I managed food and money by watching prices and reading store flyers and buying what I could cook fast that had enough fuel to get us through practice and homework in the next day. I learned to make instant items so they felt like a meal, and I figured out that if I left a pan of rice in the fridge, I could pull off something passable when I got home from a late activity without doing a full start from zero. None of this felt heroic to me, and I do not write any of this to make it sound like I'm looking for praise. This is just what

happened and what I had to do for us to get by without constant emergencies. I missed events and skipped hangouts with friends because if I left my brother alone at night, he would be alone at night, I knew what it felt like to sit in a quiet place and count the minutes. I would not make him do more of it than he already did. When I reached the end of high school, the question came up about moving away for college, and I said I could not leave yet because my brother still needed someone who had been doing the job day to day. My father asked if he could push for more time, and I said he could try, but I did not want

court fights that might not change the outcome. We worked out that I would do community classes and work nearby and keep things steady until my brother was on his feet. I did that, and when he was older and had a license and spent most nights at our father's place, I moved into a small place with a roommate and started to focus on my life. I carried habits from those years, but I also started to breathe a bit because I was no longer watching the door for our mother and I was no longer calculating whether we had enough left for dinners and school stuff until the next support transfer. Fast forward to now. I am pregnant, and my partner and I planned a baby shower that included both sides of my family.

I thought we could get through a short event without rehashing the past because the focus would be on the baby and on basics like diapers and bottles and gear and who would handle food that day. I gave clear instructions to the friend who hosted that we did not want speeches or toasts or games that needed a mic. We set a time window and kept it short and during most of the event people were fine. My parents were in the same space without speaking, and that was fine because the goal was not to reconcile them but to get through the event without trouble. Near the end, my mother moved into a group and started telling a story about how she raised two kids alone and how hard it was after my father cheated and left her without support. She said it in a voice that carried, looked around at people while she said it, and kept going.

My father was within earshot and stood there without saying anything. I watched people listen and nod, and I knew that it. if I stayed quiet, I would be co-signing a version of my life that cuts out a lot of nights that I lived and a lot of work that I did and a lot of support that my father provided. The calculation in my head was fast and simple, either I interrupt and make it clear that the story is not accurate, or I let it sit and then I end up correcting versions of it later in smaller rooms for years. I chose the first option and said in a clear voice that I raised myself and that I raised my brother during her time and that my father did not abandon us and paid support and showed up. I said if people

people want to know who cooked, who signed forms, who handled pickups, who called the bus line, who sat in clinics, who met teachers, and who made sure there was food, then they can talk to me. I said I would not let my child grow up inside a story that assigns credit to someone who did not do the work. My mother told me I was ungrateful and that I was humiliating her. She left the event with her friends and did not speak to me for two weeks. She sent a message the day after the shower that said I crossed a line and that she would not talk to me until I apologized. I did not answer that message because an apology for speaking truth would take me backwards and because I needed to keep my energy on the birth and on setting up

support that would work for those first weeks. I made a schedule for visits and told both sides that visits would be short and by arrangement and that we would not host drop-ins and that there would be no posts of the baby without our consent. My father said he understood and asked what else we needed. My mother did not respond with anything except silence. About one week before my due date, my mother asked to meet near her place. She said she had thought about the shower and that she could see how her words were wrong. She said that she left us without supervision on many nights and that she used bars and friends to cope with the divorce and the affair. She said she was depressed and felt empty and shut down and that being with friends at bars kept her from sitting

alone. She admitted that she should have gotten help and that she did not because of cost and fear of judgment. She asked for a chance to be a present grandmother and to build trust. I told her that I accept her recognition of behavior but that I am not going to rewrite the past and that if she wants a role, it will be built on small, reliable actions over a long stretch. I told her I would not be her therapist or manager of her health and that if she believes she needs help, she should get help from professionals. I set clear rules for visits and said if she broke those rules, we would pause. She said she understood, cried, and I did not rush to make her feel better because I am not doing that job anymore. My father came by with a bag of supplies and asked if I wanted to talk about what

happened. I told him about the cafe conversation, and he said he felt shame at the shower because he knows that his affair started the chain that ended in the divorce. He apologized for not pushing harder long ago when he suspected that things were not steady at my mother's place. He said he was afraid a court fight would fail and that we would lose time with him and that it would blow up our lives. We sat with that, and I said that I do not want to relitigate old choices every time something happens and that I need him to stay focused on what we need now. He said he would and asked me to tell him when he starts to over-function or to push too hard because of guilt. I appreciated that because it spoke to the pattern I do not want to repeat where emotions drive actions that end up creating

more work for me. The baby shower event led to questions from family who heard two different versions of the past over the years. I told them that I am not trying to punish my mother and I am not trying to absolve my father and that I am not interested in ranking them. I am interested in setting a baseline for my child that is built on actual behavior and that keeps our home free of chaos and blame stories. I told them I am open to people who show up and close to people who do not. and I said if anyone tries to push me into a reconciliation arc to make themselves feel better, they can stop because I am not doing that labor for others. So why do for doing this?

Update, people messaged me and asked what happened right after the shower and whether my brother reached out and whether there was fallout. My brother called me two days after the event and said he froze during the moment when our mother was talking and that he wishes he had stepped in with a short statement of support to close the topic right there. He said he texted her that night that he agreed with me. me and that he remembered many nights where I was the person in charge and that he would not sit through future speeches that assign credit in a way that deletes the labor I did. He asked me to

send him a list of the boundaries I set for postpartum so he could reinforce them if anyone tried to push past them when I was tired or offline. I sent him the schedule and the rules around short visits and consent for photos and no posts, and he told me he would back me in any room. As for Fallout, there were some group messages where cousins asked my mother if she wanted to explain her side, and she said she was done talking to ungrateful kids. One cousin sent me a long message about how the divorce left my mother with fewer resources and that going out to bars for social support was normal. I responded that social support is not a problem, but leaving children alone night after night is a problem, and that I am not discussing that point further. My father did

not contact my mother and did not ask me to say anything to her on his behalf. He kept his comments to practical support and let the social side fall where it would. I think this helped keep me from being forced into the go-between role that I do not want to carry into this next phase of my life. In the week after the shower, I firmed up our plan for the birth and the first two weeks at home. My partner and I set up a simple system with meal drop-offs on certain days and quiet days with no visitors and listed tasks people could do if they asked how to help. We wrote it all down because word of mouth breaks down fast and because when people are in the room,

they often default to holding the baby and chatting when what we actually need is dishes, laundry and trash, and someone to pick up a card or a prescription. We communicated the plan to both sides and stuck to it. People who follow the plan got invited back, and people who did not got fewer windows. This was not a punishment. It was a way to protect a small unit during a demanding stage. My mother sent messages after the meeting that said she would follow the rules I said and that she would not bring friends or make speeches or share photos.

I asked her to confirm that she would arrive and leave on time and that she would ask before picking up the baby. She said yes. I did not engage in long exchanges because long exchanges often drift into old grievances that take hours and leave nothing useful behind. I wanted to keep every interaction with her tied to concrete actions that I could think about later. Then the birth happened.

Labor went as expected with the usual range of pain, decisions, monitoring, and checks. We kept the hospital room quiet and did not host drop-in visits. My father came during visiting hours, sat and held the baby, asked me if I needed anything specific, and then went to my place and put a few things in order. My mother came the next day during her assigned window and brought a small bag with diapers, wipes, and a short note where she said she wanted to do better going forward. She asked if she could hold the baby, and I said yes. She sat and held the baby and did not talk about the past or the shower or my father and did not pull out a phone without asking. After 20 minutes, she handed the baby back and said she would leave so I could rest.

This was the first visit in many years where I did not feel like I was managing her mood or trying to steer the room around her needs. We went home and started our schedule. People came and left at set times and did specific tasks. We kept a log on the fridge where we wrote down feeding times. times, diaper counts, meds, and tasks. This helped because when someone asked how to help, we could point to the list instead of making up tasks on the spot while holding a crying baby. My mother came to our place during her scheduled windows and asked what she could do. I told her to fold laundry and wash bottles and wipe surfaces, and she did those things.

She did not correct our routines or offer unsolicited advice or try to take over the baby. She set a timer on her phone and left when it went off. I noted each successful visit because I want to evaluate with data, not with hope. Update 2. Another update because people asked whether I would do therapy with my mother or push her into treatment or get involved in managing her health. I told my mother that if she wanted to seek therapy, I would share names of providers and a link to an intake portal, and that was the extent of my involvement. I sent a short list that matched her insurance and said that if she wanted to tell me she had scheduled something, she could, and if she wanted to keep that private, that was her choice.

She texted about two weeks later that she had done an intake and had a first session and that it was hard to sit with feedback about her patterns. She said the therapist asked her to describe how she coped after the divorce and how that affected us and that she could see that she told herself a story where she saw herself as the primary source of our survival even when the facts do not support that. I told her I heard her and that I would watch what she does now. I also said a rule about child care. For now, only my father, my brother, and two close friends can handle solo time with a baby.

My mother can visit while I'm present and she can help with tasks. If she continues to show consistency for many months, we can revisit. She said she understood and asked if she could take the stroller for a short walk with me present. I said yes to a loop around the block while we were together, and we did that and it was fine. She did not push for more, and I appreciated that because pushing would have set us back. Money came up because my mother offered to contribute. I said if she wanted to set a small monthly transfer into the account we opened for the baby's future, that would be helpful. I asked her not to buy gear without coordination because space and routines matter more than random items.

She agreed and set up a transfer and brought a transfer. consumables instead of large items. During visits, she sometimes reads from a book while I rest, and that helps more than grand gestures. I prefer help that slots into our plan. Regarding my father, I told him directly that I do not want him to grade my mother on a curve because of his guilt about the affair. I told him not to overpraise basic compliance or to talk about her progress in a way that puts pressure on me to reciprocate with gratitude. He said he understands and keeps his comments even and linked to task. He also keeps some distance from any contact with her so that I am not triangulated.

He focuses on errands, rides, and small fixes in our place that matter in the day-to-day. When he does something, he writes it on the board and then moves on. This keeps our interactions clean and useful. Questions came up about whether I keep a relationship with extended family members who have strong opinions about what happened, and some of them told me to forgive fast because life is short. I told them I am not running a forgiveness contest and I am not counting days until a deadline. I am running a household with a newborn and trying to build a sane rhythm. Anyone who helps that is welcome in this season and anyone who adds friction is not.

I am clear in texts and in person, and I do not argue after I lay out the rule. People adjust or they stop coming. Both outcomes are fine with me. Update 3. The third update because a test of the new news is. rules came up during a naming gathering at my partner's family home where both my parents were invited for a short block. My partner's family wanted a small event where a few relatives could come and sit for a bit and say a few words of support and then share a meal and go home.

We sent the same rules and the same time windows for visits and said up front that there would be no speeches from my parents and no toasts about the past. My mother asked if she could say a blessing for a minute and I said we are not doing open mic things and that she should keep any words for her own time. On the day of the event, she arrived on time and sat in the back and helped plate food and did not try to join groups with my in-laws to retell history. My father arrived on time and sat with my brother and kept to his lane halfway through the event. One of my partner's relatives thanked both of my parents for raising me. I felt a small push from the room toward a familiar arc where people look at the older generation and wait for a response. My mother started to speak,

and I looked at her and shook my head once and said we are keeping this focused on the baby. She stopped speaking and sat back. My father kept quiet. The event moved on. This might sound small, but for us it was a moment where an old pattern could have grabbed the wheel and it did not. Another test came up a week later when my mother arrived late to a scheduled visit by 15 minutes and then wanted to stay past the end time to make up her minutes. I said no because the end time matters for naps, feeds, and sanity. She said traffic was the reason and asked me to be flexible. I said life has traffic and the rule is about start and end times.

If she wants more time, she can show me that she can hit start times across several visits and then we can discuss small adjustments. She left on time and did not push. That was also a data point I marked because follow-through matters more than promises to do better next time. People asked if I planned to rebuild a closer relationship with my mother beyond these structured visits. I am not making promises about that because I do not run relationships on hope anymore. I run them on behavior over time. I will say that I have seen small steps. She has kept her hands busy with tasks in my home without asking for praise. She has not asked to post photos.

She has not retold the shower story. She has started therapy. She has stayed out of fights with my father. These are all steps. I can notice them and keep my boundaries at the same time. My brother has taken on the role of Uncle in a way that shows me he is ready to leave the perennified role behind. He comes by on weekends and does errands that I assign. He cooks a pot of something and sets up containers and labels them, and that saves us time for days. He holds the baby and follows directions, and he tells me to sleep while he runs dishes and resets the space.

I told him that seeing him in this role without the old weight on his shoulders is a moment I will not forget. He said he feels the same and that he is glad we can experience a family moment where we are not carrying someone else's responsibilities. There have been messages from readers here about whether I will ever accept an apology from my mother as enough. My answer is that apologies do not carry much weight for me without consistent action and time. I am not tallying points, but I am tracking behavior because I have learned that without tracking, I end up in a fog of feelings, and that leads me back to doing labor for other people. I am not doing that anymore, and I am not raising my child inside that fog. I will keep our home on a predictable track, and anyone who wants and will fit that track.

Now, because this is Reddit and people ask for judgments, I will ask a question. I do not need a label of right or wrong, but I could use input on a couple of choices that are coming up. One is whether to allow my mother a short solo outing with a stroller in the next few weeks if she continues to show up on time and follow directions. I am leaning toward waiting longer because once she is out of the apartment with the baby, I cannot control what she says to people she might meet or whether she tries to take a photo and send it around. I can outline rules, but outside the apartment, rules are harder to monitor. I would rather build more an apartment hours before we expand. Another question is whether to invite both of my parents to the same future kid events like birthdays or school things or whether to alternate. My instinct is to alternate for a while because shared events invite speeches and narratives and sideways comments, and I want to skip that during early years.

Update 4. Two months went by, and my mother kept her therapy schedule based on what she chose to share, and she showed up to the majority of her windows on time. she missed two and gave notice on one and did not give notice on the other. On the missed visit without notice, I did not reschedule that week and pushed the next window by a week as a natural consequence because my time is not an open slot that others can fill or drop as they wish. She accepted that without argument, and on next visits, she arrived early and waited in her car until the start time, which I took as a sign that she understands the rule matters. Inside the apartment, she kept picking tasks and stayed out of baby management unless I asked. She did try once to adjust the swaddle, and I told her to stop, and she did and did not try again.

One event threw a wrench into the plan, and this was the first time I had to do a hard stop. At a family dinner that was not in our home, my mother started telling the person sitting next to her that she did what she needed to do to survive after the divorce and that people do not understand the cost of betrayal. I heard that from across the room and stood up and walked over and said that this topic is off limits and that if it continues, we will leave. She said she was just making conversation. I said this conversation violates the rule that history is not a story to be performed in shared spaces. I took my partner and the baby, and we left after saying goodbye to the host. I texted my mother later that visits were paused for two weeks and that one more event

like that would move her back to zero. She responded the next day that she was sorry and that she would not do that again. When the pause ended, she came to the next window and followed rules. My father is kept to the plan without incident. He has not used my mother's behavior to make commentary about who is better or worse. He has not asked for more access than we can give during this period. He has not tried to make amends for years past through grand gestures that create more work. He keeps it steady, and that is what I need from him. One time he started to say that he regretted the affair again in the middle of a visit while I was feeding the baby. I told him I did not have the bandwidth to hold that topic and that we could discuss it during a separate time if he needed

to talk it through. He said no problem and switched to washing bottles, and that was the end of it. I have had to remind a few relatives to stop asking me to be in the same photo with both of my parents. I do not do that. I take separate photos and I do not post them and I do not let others post them. When people say they want a nice family shot for memories, I say my priority is my child's schedule and not their photo album. I do not apologize, I say it plainly and move on. The fewer words I use, the better, because arguments grow in blank space. I hope you enjoy this story. My parent insisted that I conceal my pregnancy and infant child, so that my sibling could receive all the focus at her marriage ceremony, but when I declined, she attempted to manipulate my child, up for adoption without my

knowledge using fake legal documents. So my sister is getting married at the end of this year, and I gave birth to my son about three weeks ago. Everybody was happy about this, apart from my mother, and I wasn't even surprised because to her, nothing is more important than her darling baby, and that happens to be my little sister. I obviously got pregnant a while ago, and my sister got engaged to her boyfriend of three years when I was six months pregnant. Anybody who understands math would know that by the time my sister got married, would have already given birth to the baby. It would have been one thing if my sister was the kind of person who wanted a small wedding and would plan it quickly, but she wanted an elaborate

and grand wedding, which would obviously take a lot of time. She and her fiancé had been quite clear about that right from the beginning. But even then, a couple of weeks after their engagement, my mom showed up at my house looking all worried. She told me that she wanted me to do something about my pregnancy because she didn't want me to upset my sister. My sister and I are not close in the slightest. She's a spoiled brat, and ever since my father passed away a couple of years ago,

we've had no contact. The only reason I even stayed in touch with my mother after my dad's passing was because I had promised him that I would look after her, since he didn't think my sister would be up to the task. She was just not responsible enough. Even though my sister had always been my mom's favorite, I had tried my best to maintain a relationship with her. That changed recently when she showed up at my house to tell me that my sister was engaged in getting married.

I thought she had just come over to share the good news with me, but she then went on to tell me that since I was giving birth the same year she was getting married, it would take away her limelight because obviously a pregnancy was a bigger milestone than a wedding. I don't even understand what that was about, and I told her she was being unnecessarily paranoid. First of all, it's not like people would skip her wedding because I had a baby or whatever. I wasn't even going to be invited to her wedding since she hadn't even been invited to mine, we're not friends, so there was no way I could overshadow her. I wouldn't even be there, and she and my mom had nothing to worry about. I'm not some celebrity, so I was pretty sure that even at her wedding, nobody would be talking about me or my baby.

I thought these were all valid points, but my mother told me I needed to hide my pregnancy and my baby from everyone in the family and all our common friends as well because she didn't want me to steal my sister's limelight. I thought it was crazy and got into a huge fight with her, after which I didn't speak to her anymore. I felt bad about breaking my promise to my father, but there was no other option for me because she was obviously acting crazy. I was already pregnant and quite irritable, I just couldn't handle her idiotic statements. She hasn't been there for anything after that. It's just been me, my husband. and his family taking care of the baby ever since he was born.

My mother wasn't even there for the birth of the child. My husband had called her that day, but she had refused to show up since she was out with my sister. I'm pretty sure that even if she hadn't been out with her, she still wouldn't have shown up because I'm just not a priority for her, and that's the bitter truth. If she could have abandoned her own daughter and our relationship because she thought I was stealing the limelight from my sister just by giving birth,

then I had nothing to say to her, because of all these things, we had absolutely no contact, and I was fine with it. But then she called me up a couple of days ago. When I didn't answer initially, she started texting me frantically and told me to answer the call because she had to talk to me about something very important that had happened. It was clear she had some bad news to share with me. I really didn't want to talk to her, but I kept thinking about the promise I had made to my father and decided to answer her.

I'm really glad I did because that's how I found out she was in legal trouble. She had tried to put my baby up for adoption without our consent, and the adoption agency found out about it. It was a case of fraud and misrepresentation because apparently she had contacted an adoption agency and falsely claimed that she had power of attorney. She told them that both my husband and I were addicts and had been deemed unfit to take care of our baby by the court, so as the custodial caretaker of the baby, she had decided to put him up for adoption.

Obviously, they easily found out that all the legal documentation she provided had been fake and immediately stopped the process. Now they were going to take this up legally. She was calling me because she was scared about what was about to happen next. She had been informed that they were going to take legal action against her and that she would be served in a couple of days. But before they could find out how to contact me and inform me, she decided to tell me about it herself so I would be able to help her out somehow.

She had been crying on the phone and begging. me to help her out, but I could hardly understand how she could expect me to help her when she had done something so horrible. I could understand that she wanted my sister to have all the limelight, but going out of her way to put my baby up for adoption, that was just disgusting, and I think it was pretty stupid as well. This way, it's just going to bring more attention to me because now I plan on suing her too. After she explained the situation to me, I just disconnected the phone call because I had nothing to say to her anymore. I didn't feel bad for her at all.

In fact, I thought she deserved this and even worse. Later that day, I was contacted by the adoption agency so they could let me know what was going on and I could do what was needed. I had already spoken to my husband after my mother's phone call, and after the adoption agency contacted us as well, the two of us decided we were going to pursue legal action against her

because there was no way she could do something like that and hope to get away with it. We spoke to a lawyer a day after that, and within a few days we had filed a civil lawsuit against her. The proceedings against her are going to start soon, but given the seriousness of the situation, criminal charges have been filed against her as well, so there's little to no scope for mediation. The best she can hope for is an out-of-court settlement or maybe a plea bargain for the criminal charges, but even then she might be facing jail time. She's under house arrest right now, but she can still contact me, and that's why she's

been sending me emails one after the other, begging me to help her out somehow. She's been apologizing and telling me that she just got carried away because she had been very upset with my decision not to hide my baby and my pregnancy for my sister's sake. Obviously, she knows it was a messed up thing to do, and she's really sorry for it. I have been able to ignore her so far, but then she hit me where it hurt yesterday and reminded me that I had promised my father that no matter what, I would always take care of her, and this didn't seem like taking care of her right now. That kind of caught me off guard because I had had that conversation with my father in private, and I didn't even know that she knew about that promise I had made.

So now, am I the asshole for suing my mother for trying to put my baby up for adoption without my consent or knowledge? Update 1 I have decided not to drop the civil lawsuit against her. She deserves this. She brought this on herself, and I'm not going to back down just because of the promise I made. I had taken it very seriously for the past couple of years ever since my father passed away, and I had tried my best to live up to the promise I made.

But at this moment, it's just emotional manipulation, emotional manipulation at its finest, which is why I almost fell for it as well. I using my father to defend herself, that's just low. A lot of people have criticized me for even bothering to live up to the promise for so long when it was so evident that my mother couldn't care less about me. but I don't know if you guys have ever lost a parent, that stuff is heavy. I lost my father to cancer, so this was literally a promise I made to him on his deathbed. I don't know about everybody else, but that's not the kind of thing I can take lightly,

and that's why I've been putting up with my mother for so long. But this is crossing a line. Now that I have made up my mind, nothing can make me back down, and even my husband thinks I have made the right call. I'm not even asking for a lot of money, I just want her to pay whatever I have spent on her in the past couple of years because I have been taking care of her since my sister wouldn't spend even a dollar on her. To be fair to her, though, she doesn't spend any money on anybody apart from herself, so it's not very surprising. It's probably

the reason why my father asked me to be there for my mom, but I don't think he could have seen something like this happening at any point in the future. I'm sure he will forgive me for this, and even if he doesn't, I still have to do it for my own sake. I also thought it three. I also thought it through, her having to pay back the money she owes me is not going to cost her anything. I know for a fact that my father had not only left her the house but a substantial sum of money as well, so she will be able to get by. Even apart from that, she has her brother to take care of her after me. Even if she does lose everything because of this lawsuit, it's still not going to be any of my concern because I have tried my very best, and it's not been enough. I don't think anything will ever be enough for her.

I am done trying to be a good daughter. I'm simply a mother now, and that's my only priority. Update 2. It's been a few weeks since my last update. We are currently in the process of mediating since everybody wants to settle the civil lawsuit out of court. It hasn't been going well so far, and we have had to terminate every session after a while because my mother would get too emotional and would start screaming. I don't know if that's her strategy or if she's actually losing it.

Whatever the case is, it's just delaying the inevitable, and I don't think she realizes that there is no way out of this for her. My uncle has also reached out to me to try and convince me to back off. He has told me that the amount I'm demanding from her as a settlement is way too huge and unfair. He has also brought up the fact that she was the one who had raised me from when I was a baby, and this is really ungrateful of me not to forgive her for one stupid little mistake. But that's the thing, it was not a stupid little mistake. She had literally falsified documentation, and I don't think if it had been a heat of the moment decision, she would have been able to come up with that. It was all premeditated, and that's the scary part because by some fluke, if the adoption agency hadn't done its due diligence, she probably wouldn't even have been caught.

The more I think about the situation, the less forgiving I feel, and I feel like no amount of money is ever going to make up for what she did. at least I'm being kind enough to only demand whatever I had spent on her so far, not a single dollar more. Obviously, that's not mentioned anywhere in the paperwork, so he wouldn't know that. But even when I mentioned that to him, he still told me it was extremely unfair of me to do so. After a while, I started getting agitated, and I really didn't want to fight with him because so far, my uncle and I have not had a bad relationship, and I do not want to ruin that. But since he seemed bent on doing exactly that, I started fighting with him as well. I told him that if he cared so much about his sister, then maybe he should just bail her out by offering to bear the cost

of the settlement himself. And then we could be done with this a lot quicker. That's when he started yelling at me and calling me all sorts of names, and I ended the phone call because clearly there was no point in speaking to him anymore. I don't even understand how anybody can find themselves defending her right now given the circumstances. On one hand, I had my uncle, and on the other, I have my sister, who has been insufferable ever since she found out about the lawsuit against our mother. I don't know why, but she has been making me out to be the villain in this situation, claiming that I'm doing this all because I want to get back at her and my mom for not paying me enough attention. At least my uncle had the guts to come and speak to me directly.

She has been speaking behind my back to everybody we know, and that's how everybody in the family has been able to find out about the lawsuit. I really didn't want that happening because I didn't want to answer questions since this is really personal and kind of disturbing, and I didn't think it was necessary for me to talk to people about this. But since she has been talking everybody's ear off about it, people have had a lot of questions and have been reaching out to me as well. So even though I didn't want to bring it up with anyone right now, I'm having to answer questions. The only reason I'm even doing it is because at some point, I might have to get them to testify if this goes to court, so I'm just consoling myself by telling myself that this was bound to come out at some point or the other, so better now than later. But the bigger problem is the narrative that my sister has been setting, like I got vindictive and stuff, and that's why I'm pursuing this legally. I don't even think she understands the gravity of what our mother has been trying to do,

and this is not some sort of sibling rivalry that is manifesting itself in the form of lawsuits. I don't even understand how somebody can be so stupid and self-involved, but well, it's my sister, so it's not very surprising. After all, she's my mother's true daughter. I have been speaking to the rest of my family, and it's kind of funny that this whole thing had actually started because my mother wanted my sister's wedding to be the event of the year, that's why she wanted me to hide my pregnancy and my baby. But now, because of her own actions, this is going to be the family highlight for a long time to come, not just this year. I hate to acknowledge it, but it's pretty scandalous from a gossip point of view. If I myself had not been involved in this directly,

I probably would have found it pretty juicy as well. It sounds a bit trashy to say out loud, but it's really just poetic justice for my sister because now not even her wedding can top something like this. Update 3. My mother has agreed to our terms, and soon enough we will be receiving our settlement money. But apart from that, she's still under trial for her criminal charges right now. She and her lawyer are doing their best to get her out of it without any jail time, but for now it's looking bleak from what I know. I have already been asked to testify by the prosecution, and so have the people from the adoption agency, so let's see how that goes. Apart from that, even my sister and a couple of other people from the family who are close to us

have also been contacted. It's been a couple of weeks since our last update, and and so far things have been going well for our family. We even managed to sneak in a short weekend trip with our son so we could go and see his great-grandparents. I don't mean my grandparents, they're not around anymore, but thankfully my husband's grandparents are still around. When we went to see them and spoke to them about whatever was going on in our family, they told me I was doing the right thing by stepping up for my child.

I even shared the guilt I was feeling because I had broken my promise to my father, but they told me I had nothing to feel bad about because if my father had been around, he would have probably told me to go for it because this is just insane. That made me feel considerably better about everything, and I guess I really needed a change of scenery because when I came back, I started feeling really refreshed. It had definitely been quite a distressing experience for me so far because even though my mother and I had had differences in the past,

it had never gone to these levels. In the last couple of sessions with our lawyers, she had probably realized that screaming and terminating our sessions was not going to make anything better and eventually it would end up going to court, and that would probably end even more badly for her. So probably at the advice of her lawyer, she decided to behave herself and let her lawyer do all the talking. She would hardly even look at me, and even when she would, she would look very quickly, like she couldn't bring herself to even glance at me. I think it's a good thing because she doesn't deserve to feel like she has the right to even see me anymore.

my uncle and my sister are still actively spreading hate against me in the family, but that hardly matters to me because anybody who wants to be on my side is going to be on my side nevertheless. People who just want to gossip, I'm sure they are going to stick to the sidelines and not actively get involved, so they don't pose any threat to me. As long as that's happening, I'm fine with whatever they're saying about me because I'm secure enough to know that it won't make the truth change just because they're saying it. Update 4

It's been a little over a month since my last update. My mother had agreed to my terms, and a couple of weeks ago our settlement money finally came through. We are setting that aside for our son's future because we can do without that money right now. We're quite happy with it because this was the money we were owed. This is what I had been spending on my mother in the past couple of years after my father passed away. My sister knows that, but in spite of that, she showed up the other day and started accusing me of ruining her wedding because apparently our mother had promised her that she would pay for part of the wedding. Now, since I had sued her and taken back all the money, our mother won't be able to live up to

that anymore, and it's all my fault, apparently. It was crazy because literally while she was yelling at me about it, she had mentioned it herself, that I had taken back all the money. That meant it was originally mine, so it's not like she wasn't aware of the situation. In spite of that, she still thought it was appropriate to be yelling at me instead of questioning why any of this was happening at all. When she showed up, I hadn't even let her in, so I had been speaking to her at the door. The second she started yelling at me, I slammed the door shut because I really didn't need this. I was already quite busy with work because even though I was on maternity leave, I was still trying to work from home so I wouldn't be overwhelmed when I rejoined. On top of that, I had to look after my

son as well, so I didn't have time for this drama. But even when I showed, shut the door, she didn't take the hint and continue to stand outside and scream about how unfair everything had been for her. After a while, when she still didn't leave, I started to get annoyed and decided to call the cops. Within a couple of minutes, they had shown up. While they were dragging her away, she started cursing at me so loudly that even the neighbors, who had probably been peeking outside from behind the curtains until then, actually came out to watch what was going on. It was extremely embarrassing. While she was cursing at me, she also said a bunch of concerning things about me and my child.

I don't want to repeat that, but they were pretty threatening, and I didn't feel comfortable with it at all. I had already called my husband up and told him what was going on as soon as I had called the cops, so he came back home earlier than usual. I told him whatever my sister had been saying, or rather threatening us with, while the cops were dragging her away. One of the officers had even suggested we file a restraining order because obviously, there was something very wrong going on with her, and we do think it would be a good idea to go ahead with the restraining order because I really don't feel safe anymore. Now that I think about it, she not only knows where I live, she knows every other way how to contact me. If she took it upon

herself to try and make me feel uncomfortable, she would easily succeed in doing so. I'm not saying she's going to go ahead and do whatever she had threatened me with, but even apart from that, there are other ways to intimidate a person, and I'm just scared because I'm a mother now and I don't want episodes like this repeating again. After a really long discussion with my husband, we decided we were going to move. I had already been planning to change my phone number and other contact info so that people wouldn't be able to contact me without having a good relationship with me first. It's not even just about my sister. I have had a lot of messages and phone calls from people who only want to gossip, and it's getting really annoying at this point. So that was another reason. for me to change everything because the last thing I need is visitors who only want to talk about this situation and gossip about it. My husband has been doing well for himself, and if we need to, we can just ask my in-laws to help out as well. But we will definitely be moving, and we will also definitely be filing for a restraining order against my sister because she's clearly unhinged, and I don't want her coming around anymore. Everything has been pretty expensive for us

so far because we had to pay for our lawyer, and of course we have a newborn with us, so even that's pretty expensive. The finances have been a bit tight recently, and with the move and everything, it's probably going to get even more expensive for us. But when I think about my son, it seems worth the trouble. I'm honestly just really tired of everything, but my husband and my son are the only people who keep me going and motivated to do better. I don't think I said it enough, but I'm really happy and lucky to have found a partner who understands me so well. I would say I'm pretty lucky that even his family has been standing by me throughout all this. To be frank, after my dad had passed away, it was mostly my in-laws who had been there for me,

even more than my own mother. I know for a fact that not everybody is lucky enough to have such wonderful in-laws, so I'm very thankful for them as well. It has been a really messy and exhausting past couple of months, and I'm just really hoping that it comes to an end soon. Update 5. Last week, the verdict of my mother's trial finally came through, and she has been convicted on all charges. Since she's a first-time offender, she's going to have to pay a huge fine as restitution to both the adoption agency and me, along with several hours of community service. She has been able to dodge incarceration, but she does have to attend court-mandated mental health treatment in a rehabilitation facility since her lawyer made it seem like she had been going through some psychological issues. I'm not in touch with her anymore and haven't been ever since she agreed to the terms of our civil lawsuit and we came to a settlement. I found out about it from a couple of family members, and well, I guess it's fair enough. I also managed to get a restraining order against my sister soon after my last update, so that's another win for me. We are currently in the process of moving houses, and it's a bit stressful, but we can handle it.

Especially with the money that's about to come in, it's been a huge relief for us, so we might not need to ask our in-laws for help at all. We won't even need to dip into the settlement money that we had decided to put aside for our son, so it's all worked out in our favor. Even though my mother got lucky legally, she hadn't been so lucky in her personal life. I've been hearing a lot of gossip and have even been sent screenshots of my sister's recent posts on social media. She has denounced everything that her mother has done so far, going as far as to claim that she had no knowledge of any of this until recently and that she doesn't agree with my mother's behavior at all and thinks that she deserves to get convicted. That's not what she had been saying to me before everything went

wrong. Before that, she had been strongly on our mother's side. From what I know, she did this because her fiancé and her in-laws had not been comfortable with the idea of him marrying into a family like this, which is quite understandable actually. They had been considering postponing the wedding, which is why she decided to cut off our mother in such a public way. It sucks for our mom because all her life she had been dedicated to my sister, and now this is what she gets. It's pretty sad, but well-deserved. I don't feel bad for her at all. Now that I'm moving, I'm going to have nothing to do with these people, and I really can't wait.

I hope you enjoy this story. My sibling impregnated my partner during our relationship, leading to my devout guardians evicting me and utilizing my educational savings for the infants' room, before reaching out to me again after some time. Begging for money when they lost everything. Life had been simple, at least, I had convinced myself. I was young, ambitious, in love, and most importantly, I had a plan. My girlfriend, Ava, and I were planning our future. We were both in college, determined to finish our degrees, to take on the world together.

My parents were supportive. They were the typical, picture-perfect, church-going couple. The kind of people who never missed a Sunday service, who preached about hard work and family values. They were strict, yes, but they were always there when you needed them. Or at least, that's what I thought. Ava and I had been together for two years. We met freshman year and connected instantly. We had our dreams, big dreams.

I had always thought I would get a steady job, eventually pay off the college loans, and maybe get a house in the suburbs. I could already picture it, us, a dog, a family. The typical American dream. But nothing had prepared me for the storm that was coming. It was late one night when Ava told me she was pregnant. The words hit me like a freight train, knocking all the breath out of me. I wasn't ready for this. We weren't ready.

We were still figuring things out. I had my own dreams, and so did she. But there it was, an undeniable fact staring us in the face. The next few weeks were a blur. We talked about it for hours, weighing our options. Ava wanted to keep the baby. She was scared, but her heart was set. I couldn't blame her.

I was scared too, but I supported her decision. The more I thought about it, the more I realized that we were about to start a whole new chapter. And this time, it wasn't just about me anymore, it was about us, together, but everything shifted the day I found out that my brother, Josh, had been involved with Ava, too. I can still feel the punch in my gut when she admitted it. She was crying, her face buried in her hands. She apologized over and over, but nothing could make the pain go away. My brother, the one person I had always considered my best friend had betrayed me.

and not just betrayed me, but had been the one who got her pregnant. I had no words. My whole world turned upside down in that moment. How could he do this to me? How could she? I tried to put it together, but it felt impossible. Ava and I had been in a relationship for over two years. How did this happen? I called Josh. I had to hear it from him. When I asked him about it, he acted like it was no big deal. He had never once apologized. He just said it happened and that we had to move on. Move on. My heart felt like it had been ripped from my chest. I couldn't process it. Not from him. And then there were my parents. When they found out about the pregnancy, they seemed oddly calm about it, too calm. I remember my mom's reaction as if it were yesterday.

She just stared at me, blank-faced, then muttered something about God's plan. She said it was all part of a bigger picture, a test of faith, that we all had a purpose, and we had to embrace it. My dad, who had always been the tough one, just nodded in agreement. They didn't even mention the fact that Josh was involved. They just brushed it aside like it was nothing. But when they started talking about the family, that's when I lost it. They said I should support Josh, that this was our chance to show love and forgiveness,

and that I needed to let go of my anger. It was all part of God's plan, they said. My mother actually said that. And as much as I wanted to scream, as much as I wanted to tell them how they had failed me, nothing I said could change them. They were so blinded by their faith that they couldn't see the damage this was causing me. The days that followed were chaotic. My parents kept pressuring me to forgive Josh, to help him.

They tried to convince me that it was for the greater good. They told me to be a bigger man, to rise above it. They said I was the older brother, that I should be setting an example for the family. The hypocrisy was overwhelming. They said they had sacrificed so much for me, and now it was my turn to make things right. The more they spoke, the more I felt like I was being suffocated. I could see it clearly now, everything I had worked for, everything I had built in my mind for the future, was slipping away. My dream of graduating, of living independently, of making something of myself, it was all slipping through my fingers like sand.

My life wasn't just being derailed. It was being taken over by my family's decisions, by a betrayal I couldn't ignore, by a plan that wasn't my own. But then came the worst part, my parents turned on me. They didn't say it outright at first. But every conversation, every suggestion they made about how I should handle things, felt like an attack. They had made their choice they would support Josh and Ava, and I was expected to fall in line. I told them I couldn't. I couldn't support Josh, not after what he did.

I couldn't help with the baby. I had my own future to think about, and that didn't include cleaning up my brother's mess. They didn't take it well. My father was furious. He said I was acting selfish, and that I was abandoning my family when they needed me most. My mother's voice cracked as she begged me to reconsider. She said I couldn't turn my back on my brother, that this was a test of faith, and that I would regret it. But nothing they said made sense.

They had never once held Josh accountable for what he did. They had never once asked him to make amends. That's when it happened, the moment everything changed. They kicked me out. It wasn't some big dramatic showdown, just a cold, methodical decision. They told me I couldn't stay in the house anymore. They said they couldn't have me around if I was going to continue being so negative, so divisive. They told me to leave, and that I would never be welcomed back unless I apologize to Josh and accepted the plan.

And that was it. They took my college fund, the money I had worked so hard to save and given them for safekeeping, and used it to turn my room into a nursery for the baby. I felt my whole world crumble. The room that had once been filled with dreams and hope was now being repurposed for a child that wasn't even mine. My future, my education, my freedom was being erased in favor of a mess I had no part in. My parents said it was God's plan, they said it was all part of a higher purpose.

But I couldn't see it. All I could see was the wreckage of everything I had worked for, of everything I had believed in. They didn't even apologize. They just said it was what had to be done. And they were right, in their eyes. This was their path now, and I was just supposed to accept it. So, I walked out the door. And for the next three years, I didn't look back. The first few weeks after I left felt like a blur as if my whole world was, had been flipped upside down. I stayed with a friend for a while, crashing on his couch, feeling the weight of everything that had just happened. I hadn't planned on it, but it was the only option. I had no home, no support system, and nothing but my own stubborn pride to cling to. I didn't want to feel sorry for myself, but that didn't stop the wave of resentment that washed over me every time I thought about how everything had fallen apart. I couldn't get my college fund back. I had no money to sue them. The worst part was the silence. For the first time in my life, I wasn't part of my family's plans. I wasn't part of anything. No phone calls, no text messages,

no invites for dinner. It felt like they had just erased me. My parents, who had once promised me the world, had now closed their doors, treating me like I was the enemy. Every time I tried to call them, I was met with nothing but cold responses or talks about the baby. They didn't even try to understand. All they cared about was Josh and Ava and that baby. I wasn't even a footnote in their lives anymore. And Josh. He was everywhere.

My parents constantly talked about him, how he was taking responsibility, how he was stepping up for Ava, how he was going to be a great father. They acted like nothing had happened between us. They acted like I was the one who had betrayed them by refusing to help. It didn't matter that he had crossed the line in the worst possible way. To them, he was the one they could pour all their hopes into. It didn't make sense. I had given everything to help them, to do the right thing, but when I needed them most,

they had turned their backs on me. And all for the sake of a child that wasn't even mine. It was a sick joke. My entire life was being rewritten by people who'd, didn't even care to hear my side of things. They were too caught up in their plans to even notice the destruction they had caused. I spent the next few months just trying to get by. I enrolled in classes at a community college, figuring it was better than nothing. I worked at a part-time job at a coffee shop, trying to make ends meet. I tried not to think about my past, about what my

parents had done. But no matter how hard I tried, the anger would creep in. The betrayal was always there, gnawing at me, reminding me of everything I had lost. But long after I'd stopped expecting anything from my family. The number flashed on my screen, one I hadn't seen or thought about in years. For a moment, I stared at it, debating whether to answer. My curiosity went out. I swiped to accept, lifting the phone to my ear with an almost clinical detachment. Her voice cracked through the line, small and trembling.

It was my mother, she said my name like a prayer like the sound of it alone might save her. I stayed silent, letting the weight of her own desperation pull her down further. The silence must have unnerved her because she immediately began explaining, her words tumbling over each other in a messy, incoherent stream. She told me they'd lost the house, their savings, all the stability they once took for granted, it was all gone. She said she couldn't explain it, something about a failed. investment, some vague mention of a scam. She said my father had been too proud to admit they were

in trouble until it was too late. Now they were drowning, barely keeping the lights on, barely scraping together enough for food. She asked if I was still there, her voice cracking under the weight of her own shame. I told her I was listening, keeping my voice deliberately even. Detached. I wanted her to feel the distance, the chasm they had created when they turned their backs on me. She continued, her words faltering but persistent. She said they were sorry, that they'd made mistakes. She said she wished things had been different, and that she regretted how they treated me. She begged me to come home, to help them, to be the son they needed now that they had no one else. I waited until her words ran out until her police hung in the air like smoke in a closed

room. When I finally spoke, my voice was calm, measured, almost clinical. I told her it had been three years since they decided they didn't need me, three years since they took everything I had worked for and gave it to someone who hadn't earned a thing. I told her I'd spent those years clawing my way back from the hole they'd thrown me into, rebuilding my life brick by brick, alone. And now, after all this time, she thought she could pick up the phone and undo all of that with a few tears and a half-hearted apology. I didn't raise my voice. I didn't need to.

Each word was like a scalpel, slicing through whatever lingering illusion she might have held about forgiveness. She tried to interrupt, but I wouldn't let her. I told her she didn't get to rewrite history just because it suited her now. I told her I was nothing to them then, and I was nothing to them now. Her voice cracked, desperate. She asked me if I really hated them soon. so much that I'd leave them to suffer. She said they were my parents, and that blood was thicker

than water. I laughed, a sound that even startled me. I told her that blood only seemed to matter to them when it was convenient when they needed someone to clean up the mess they made. Then I said the words I knew would cut the deepest. I told her I was just a mere human, incapable of understanding God's plan. I said it with an edge sharp enough to draw blood, throwing her own holy words back at her. I reminded her of the countless times she told me to accept God's will, to put my own feelings aside for the sake of the family. I told her that if this was God's plan, who was I to interfere? She should accept it, just as she expected me to accept being cast out. She sobbed into the phone, begging me to reconsider. She said they were sorry, that they'd learned

their lesson. But I didn't waver. I told her that their repentance was between them and God, not me. I wasn't their Savior. I wasn't their second chance. She tried to invoke memories of the past, of when I was a child, of the good times we had. She said she had loved me then, that she still loved me now. I told her love wasn't something you could turn off and on like a faucet. I told her love wasn't what they showed me when they threw me out of their house,

when they stripped me of my dignity, stole my money and called it God's will. Her sobs grew louder and more frantic, but I didn't let it affect me. I had spent too many nights crying alone, too many days wondering if I'd ever be whole again. Her tears couldn't reach me now, they couldn't undo what had been done. I told her I didn't owe them anything. Not my time, not my money, not even my sympathy. I told her that the choices they made had consequences, and it wasn't my job to shield them from those consequences now that they were finally feeling the weight of them. I reminded her of the

nursery they built in my old room, the one that was supposed to be for my brother's child. I told her to turn to him now, to the son they chose over me. If anyone should be stepping up to save them, it was him. She begged me not to hang up, but I was done. I told her that I hoped they would find peace in their faith, the same faith they weaponized to destroy me. And then I ended the call. For a long moment, I just sat there, staring at the phone in my hand. I expected to feel something, anger, sadness, even guilt. But there was nothing. Just a cold, empty stillness. They had built this distance between us brick by brick, and now it was impenetrable. I put the phone down and went back to what I was doing before the call as if nothing had happened. Maybe that's what

scared me the most, that their desperation, their tears, their regret meant nothing to me anymore. They had turned me into a stranger, and I had let them. Now, there was no going back. Update 1, it was Joshua he started with a calm, almost nonchalant greeting. He said he wanted to talk. The instant I heard his voice, a flood of memories rushed back, memories of the man who had been a part of the mess that turned my world upside down. I felt my self. I felt my stomach tighten, and my throat go dry. But I didn't let him get to me. I refused to. I asked him what he wanted, keeping my voice cold and guarded. I wasn't about to make it easy for him. He said that he knew things were messy, but that wasn't the real issue. He told me he needed to

explain something. He sounded serious like he had been sitting on these words for far too long. As much as I hated the man, I found myself listening, part of me, no matter how much I tried to resist, still hoped for some accountability, some kind of apology. Josh kept going, slowly, as though choosing his words carefully. He admitted that he had messed up. He said he didn't know how to handle everything and that it had all spiraled out of control. He even said he regretted it, the tone in his voice softening as he expressed that he had never intended for things to get this bad. For a moment, I almost let myself believe him. I almost convinced myself that there was remorse behind his words.

But then the anger came rushing back, faster than I could stop it. My voice shook as I repeated the word sorry, my sarcasm dripping with every syllable. Was that really all he had to say? Was he seriously trying to reduce everything to a quick apology? After everything they had done to me, their selfishness, their lies, their disregard for me? I wasn't buying it. I reminded him that his apology wasn't enough. It wasn't nearly enough. He had taken everything from me. He had destroyed it all with one careless act. And now, he expected me to just accept his apology and move on. Josh didn't respond right

away. I could almost hear him thinking, searching for the right words to salvage the conversation. I didn't care anymore. He wasn't sorry. He was only sorry he got caught, sorry that things didn't go the way he thought they would. His regret didn't matter. His remorse didn't change the fact that I had been left behind, abandoned by my own family. When he finally spoke again, his voice was softer, filled with more emotion than I had heard before. He told me that he wasn't trying to guilt-trip me, that he wasn't asking for my money or for me to fix things for him. He said, quietly, that he was trying to make things right, for me, for Ava, and for the baby. I could feel the weight of those words hanging in the air between us. But no matter how sincere he sounded, it didn't matter.

He couldn't fix this. Not now, not ever, I couldn't keep listening. I snapped at him, telling him to stop. I didn't want to hear it anymore. It was about him and the damage he had done, the choice he had made to hurt me and turn his back on everything we had once been. Nothing he said could change that. Josh's voice wavered as he apologized again. This time, it sounded more desperate. But I was done. I had heard enough.

He could say sorry a thousand more times, but it wouldn't undo the pain. It wouldn't fix the wreckage he had caused. I told him I didn't want to hear it, and with that, I hung up the phone. Update 2, one week later the phone rang again a week later. This time, it was a different name on the screen. Ava. My brother's wife. The mother of the child they'd thrown me out to make room four.

For a moment, I debated answering, but curiosity won out again. I wanted to hear what excuse she could possibly have for inserting herself into this mess. Her voice was soft, almost timid as if she were walking on eggshells. She greeted me tentatively, saying she hoped I was doing well and that it had been too long since we last spoke. I didn't respond, letting the awkward silence stretch out between us. I wasn't going to make this easy for her. Finally, she got to the point. She said my mother had told her about the call last week, about how things were bad, really bad. She said she said she said she was. She said she was, understood why I was upset, but she begged me to think about my nephew. She said he was innocent

in all of this, that he shouldn't have to suffer because of the mistakes of the adults in his life. I felt the anger start to bubble up, slow and insidious. She had the audacity to call me, to ask me to fix the disaster they created, and now she was dragging a child into it. I clenched my jaw, trying to hold back the storm brewing inside me, but she kept going. She said my My nephew adored me, even though we'd never met. She said he deserved a chance at a good life, and if I could just find it in my heart to forgive them, I could make all the difference. I cut her off, my voice low and cold. I told her to stop. I told her I didn't want to hear another word about that child. I told her that if she thought mentioning him would magically erase the

years of pain and betrayal I endured, she was even more delusional than I thought. She stammered, clearly taken aback by my tone. She said she wasn't trying to upset me, that she just wanted me to see reason. She said family was supposed to stick together, especially in times of crisis. That's when I lost it. I told her that she had no right to lecture me about family, not after everything they'd done. I reminded her how they threw me out like trash to make room for her and her child. I reminded her how they used my college fund to prepare a nursery for the son of the man who had betrayed me in the most unforgivable way. I told her that if she wanted to talk about family, she should look to my brother, the chosen one. Where was he now, huh? Why wasn't he the one stepping up to save the day?

She tried to defend him, saying he was doing his best, that he was working hard to support their family. She said he was under a lot of stress, and they just needed a little help to get back on their feet. I laughed, bitter and sharp. I told her that her husband had been a selfish, reckless leach his entire life, and I doubted that had changed. I told her that if she married him expecting anything different, that was her mistake, not mine. I told her I didn't know her, or him, or their child a damn thing. She started to cry, her voice cracking as she begged me to reconsider. She said she didn't know how they were going to make it, that they were on the verge of of losing everything. She said she was scared for her child's future, and that she didn't know

where else to turn. Her tears did nothing but fuel my anger. I told her that if she was scared, she should have thought about that before she got involved with my brother. I told her that she made her bed, and now she had to lie in it. I told her that her child's future was her responsibility, not mine, and that if she wanted to play the victim, she'd have to find someone else to buy into her sob story. She tried one last time, her voice trembling. She said she knew I was a good person, that deep down I still cared about my family. She said she believed I could find it in my heart to forgive them, for the sake of the child if nothing else. That was the last straw. I let the words pour out of me, sharp and cutting. I called her a coward for thinking she could

use a child to manipulate me. I called her delusional for believing I would ever forgive them. I called her selfish for expecting me to clean up the mess her husband created. I told her that she and my brother were perfect for each other, two people who took and took without ever giving anything in return. By the time I was done, her sobs were uncontrollable. She tried to say something, but I didn't let her. I told her to save her tears because they wouldn't work on me. I told her to tell my parents, my brother, and anyone else who cared to listen that I was done being their scapegoat. Before she could respond, I hung up. My hands were shaking, but not from regret. It was the kind of anger that left a bitter taste in your mouth, the kind that burned long

after the flames had died down. I sat there for a while, staring at the phone in my hand. I thought about the child she'd mentioned, the innocent she had tried to use as a bargaining chair. For a fleeting moment, I felt a pang of guilt. But it passed quickly. That child wasn't my responsibility. He wasn't my problem. I wasn't the one who brought him into a world of chaos and instability. No, that was on them, my brother, his wife and my parents.

They made their choices. They destroyed their lives with their own hands, and now, they were scrambling to find someone to blame, someone to save them. But that someone would never be me. Update 3, 15 days later when the call came from the church, I was surprised. I hadn't thought about them in years. Religion had been such a central part of my family's life growing up, yet it had always felt more like a tool for control than a source of comfort.

The voice on the other end introduced himself as Pastor Daniels, someone I vaguely remembered for my teenage years. He said he hoped I remembered him and that he was calling to talk about. my family. I braced myself, expecting the usual guilt trip or moral lecture. Instead, his tone was calm, measured, and surprisingly understanding. He said he wasn't here to take sides or pressure me into anything but wanted to mediate if I was open to it. He explained that my parents had reached out to the church, desperate for help, and mentioned my estrangement. He'd thought it might be worth a try to hear my side of the story before assuming anything.

Something about his approach disarmed me. There was no judgment in his voice, no implied obligation. He made it clear that this was entirely my choice and that he respected my right to refuse. For the first time in years, I felt like someone was willing to actually listen, not just preach. I agreed, but on my terms. I told him this wasn't going to be a sob story or a moment of reconciliation. If he was calling to play peacemaker, he needed to understand everything. He agreed and asked if I'd be willing to share my side of things.

I started slowly, recounting the events that had led to my estrangement. My tone was controlled, almost clinical, as if I were recounting a story that had happened to someone else. Pastor Daniels listened quietly, his only response is the occasional hum of acknowledgement. I told him about the years that followed, the anger and heart. heartbreak, the sense of betrayal that never quite went away, I described how I'd rebuilt my life piece by piece, without them, and how their recent attempts to reconnect felt like nothing more than a desperate bid to use me again. When I finished, there was a long silence. I could hear the faint crackle of the line as Pastor Daniels processed everything I'd said.

Finally, he spoke, and his voice was filled with something I hadn't expected compassion. He said he was deeply sorry for everything I'd been through. through, that no one should have to endure such betrayal, especially from their own family. He said he hadn't realized the extent of what had happened and that it was clear my parents had only given him a partial version of events. He admitted that he had been prepared to ask me to consider forgiveness, but now he understood that this wasn't a simple matter of letting go. He said it was clear that my family's actions had caused lasting harm in that forgiveness if it ever came, would have to be on my terms and timeline. Here was someone from my family. Here was

someone from the church, a symbol of the very faith my parents had used against me, acknowledging the wrongs I had suffered. It was a strange, almost surreal feeling, like a weight I hadn't realized I was carrying had been lifted, even if just a little. I told him I appreciated his understanding, but I made it clear that I had no intention of reconciling with my family. I told him that their recent pleas for help felt like manipulation, not genuine regret. I explained that I couldn't trust them to change, and I wasn't willing to open myself up to more pain. Pastor Daniels said he respected my decision and wouldn't push me to reconsider. He said he believed that healing was a deeply personal journey and that it wasn't his place

to dictate how or when I should take that path. He said he'd continue to pray for me, not in the hollow, performative way I'd grown accustomed to, but in the hope that I would find peace in whatever form that took. I was grateful. I hope you enjoy this story. My sibling persuaded me to take legal action against our sibling for taking our grandparents' funds when they developed memory loss, but it appears she is in debt to them for $500,000 and has disposed of all the credit documents. To Haydn. Quick background, my parents passed away several years ago in an accident. My mom's parents are the only living grandparents, my sister, brother, and I are their only grandchildren. This is a very long story, so I'll try to be as brief as possible. My grandparents are approaching 90 and both have recently started to be affected by Alzheimer's. My brother has been helping them for several years, especially after our parents died. My grandparents have always been very active, very healthy, very independent people and I thought

it was ridiculous that my brother would bring them meals, shovel their walkway, mow the lawn, help them to doctor's appointments, etc., because they were perfectly able to handle that themselves. Earlier this year my grandparents were diagnosed with Alzheimer's. My brother was given medical and durable power of attorney, which was apparently how my grandparents set up their living trust. A few months after the diagnosis, my brother moved them into an assisted living home. My sister did some research and was getting very worried about everything. She explained that our brother now owned all of my grandparents' real estate properties and all their

bank accounts and stocks and whatnot and that our grandparents were now powerless. That our brother controlled everything. I was really upset and worried. worried, especially when my brother started renting one of the real estate properties out. So my sister and I decided to try to contest things. She found a lawyer who came out to my grandparents assisted living and met with them. We talked to him about how my brother was taking advantage of my grandparents and how he'd gotten them to sign over everything to him, etc. That lawyer called my sister back a few days later and said he wasn't going to represent us

because there was no case. So my sister found a different lawyer and things are now in probate court. She has way more knowledge about this whole thing, so she's taken the lead on it. The new lawyer filed complaints with the probate court that my brother had taken advantage of my grandparents by fostering dependents when he was bringing them meals, doing yard work, and taking them to the doctor when they were able to do it themselves and therefore putting himself in position to be put in charge of their money. My grandparents' money slash assets are being misused and are stolen. My brother is renting out the house at below market rates. He's trying to isolate my grandparents by taking control of all their affairs and moving them into a home.

We are asking the court to remove my brother as power of attorney and as trustee of the living trust. Now, here's my dilemma. The probate court ordered my brother to submit an accounting of my grandparents' finances and he did. Our lawyer got a copy of it last week and said that everything is not only in order, but that my brother had improved some investments to bring in more money to the trust. Our lawyer also spent a little time going over some of the information in the trust. My grandparents updated their trust when my parents died to make my brother the first person in line to take over their affairs on incapacity or death.

When my grandparents pass all of their assets are to be divided equally among my brother, my sister and me, except any outstanding loans any of us still have with them would be deducted from that person's share. He said there's also a no-com. clause in the trust, but that he needed to do more research on what that means. He said that there's no way the court will make any changes based on the accounting because it's, as he said, immaculate. However, if we have more information about my brother mistreating slash isolating my grandparents that will fight on that. Today, my sister is telling me that she believes my brother has falsified

the accounting that was done and that she's going to have proof of it and that will get my brother removed. She also plans to have the part in the trust removed about the outstanding loan. being deducted and get legal guardianship over my grandparents. I'm starting to have second thoughts and I'm not sure what to do here. If my brother falsified the accounting, what happens? If my sister comes up with proof, but I have a nagging suspicion that she's going to make something up and gives it to the court. Can I get in trouble for being on her side?

Edit, my sister is so smooth talking, so damn smooth talking. I talk to her without saying anything about this post. She didn't give me any specifics about what kind of proof she can get or what exactly she thinks our brother is doing to screw over the finances or hurt our grandparents, but she talks in such a convincing manner that I was about ready to discount everything posted here. I asked her how she thought we should manage my grandparents' care after my brother was removed and she said she thought we should move them back to their house and hire a cleaning lady off Craigslist to come out once a week so Grammy didn't have to worry about cleaning. Then I sucked it up and called my brother. He couldn't talk much since he needed to get his kids in bed soon, and he wasn't very friendly, which I think I deserve. I told him that I think I was being lied to and that our sister was acting shady. He agreed to answer my questions.

I asked him why he'd moved them to such an expensive assisted living and I guess some months back Grammy left a pot on the stove and left to go shopping. My brother stopped by while she was out and found the pot on the lit burner billowing smoke, burnt and ruined and Grandpa was watching TV totally unaware of the smoke. And Gramps had taken the batteries out of the smoke detector last time Grammy burnt something, so the fucking house could have burnt down. He moved them out right after that. And whoever said my sister owes our grandparents a lot of money was right, according to my brother. Just over half a million. I feel sick. But it's worse than that even.

Okay, so Grandpa kept really thorough financial files and he had signed loan agreements with whoever owed money and he kept everything in a file cabinet. Yes, I also owe them some money for a car but it's down to $4,000 and I've made every monthly payment. So after my brother got my grandparents moved into assisted living, he went to gather all the financial documents so he could get everything in order and he found that all the loan agreements my sister had signed were missing from her file. He suspects she took them so there'd be no record of what she owes. Apparently grandpa kept photocopy. of the important stuff including loan agreements and a payment ledger book and a fire safe as backup so my brother

has proof of what everyone owes. I feel sick, I don't know what to do. This is a nightmare. I'm going to call the lawyer tomorrow and find out how to get removed from this mess. Update 1. First, I'd like to thank everyone here for your input, suggestions, and the harsh words that it turns out I needed last fall. A few people commented that I sounded young and that's pretty true. My brother and sister are much older than me and my parents had me later in life. Mom used to say I was her favorite surprise. Smile so, yeah, I'm just getting started in college and don't have much real-world experience which isn't an excuse for how I acted, but it is what it is and I'm trying to be better.

I took a humanities class that covers aging this semester because of this whole situation with my grandparents and I learned so, so much. I really enjoyed it too. I'm thinking about changing my major so I can go into a field that helps protect the elderly-like social work. So, I told our lawyer back in November that I wanted nothing to do with the court case anymore and gave him a general outline of why I'd come to believe that my sister wasn't being totally honest. He filed stuff to show I was withdrawing my name from the case and then he fired my sister as a client. She dismissed?

I think this is the right term. Her case since she no longer had a lawyer and after some soul, searching in a couple visits with a counselor at school I told her not to contact me again and blocked her. My brother was willing to forgive me for some reason. I'm grateful for it, but I was a real jackass until I posted here about my grandparents' situation. He keeps me in the loop, which is how I know how the last almost five months have played out. My brother's attorney for the trust started getting emails from my sister's new lawyer. This would be the third one she's used about her complaints over my grandparents' estate, later in the fall. She would be the first

She was claiming to lawyer number three that my brother was hiding bank accounts slash money, that he was letting the trust's real estate properties go to junk and not taking care of them, that he didn't have insurance on the properties, he was letting people live there for free, and a bunch of other stuff that I could see was completely not true. She also started telling my grandparents these lies which upset them and, being confused, they believed her for a bit and were just awful to my brother and me. Lawyer number three was sending demanding emails to my brother's lawyer for him to show proof, that the houses are in good shape, insured, not being misused, on and on and on.

After a couple months of this, my brother's lawyer got an email directly from my sister where she listed demands such as my brother must let her take inventory of all my grandparents' possessions and take some keepsakes for herself, that any renters had to be evicted immediately, that he had to put all the real estate up for sale within 30 days. And other things that my brother's lawyer explained that he absolutely did not have to do, and if these things didn't happen within 30 days she would. be forced to pursue further legal action. And she C-Ced her lawyer on this email.

Well, my brother's lawyer got a call that same day from lawyer number three saying he had nothing to do with that email and wasn't consulted. That was the last we heard anything from lawyer number three and all was quiet for a few months. And that brings me to the current situation. My brother's lawyer recently forwarded him copies of emails with, drumroll please, my sister's new lawyer, lawyer number four. This lawyer is from a firm that does local ads like got a DUI? Charged with a crime? We can help. I don't know why they're taking on a probate situation, but it looks like they are.

And, really, it's the same stupid claims she made with lawyer number three and my brother's lawyer has already gone over with him exactly what he's supposed to be doing as the trustee so he knows he doesn't have to do any of the stuff she's saying. It's just... This is getting very hard on my brother. He's just so tired of it all. What I want to know is I guess not so much about what legal steps he should be taking, because his lawyer has that covered.

But maybe some advice from you guys since you've been dealing with all types of people in court. Why is she doing this? I mean, she apparently wants to be the trustee, but my brother's lawyer said the probate court would never give it to her since my brother has shown that he's managing everything exactly right. So why does she continue? Is there anything we can do to get her to stop? My brother's lawyer said he's seen people act like this for years,

but he didn't have any advice on anything we could do to get her to back off since she isn't breaking any laws. I would appreciate any advice or suggestions anyone has. Comments where Op has replied, comment one, That's great op that you're on the side of your stand-up brother. I appreciate your candor slash honesty about your own actions as well. Depending on how much of a nuisance slash cost your sister's actions, are to your brother, he may be able to file a lawsuit against her for the time and financial costs she's cost him and his lawyer in frivolous legal actions. This course is time-consuming

and costly unto itself. He sounds like he's already incredibly busy, father with young kids and overseeing your grandparents' health. Have you tried approaching your sister to ask her to stop? It's the least you could do seeing as what your brother has done for your grandparents and the grace he's shown you. Up, he may be able to file a lawsuit. against her for the time and financial costs she's cost him and his lawyer in frivolous legal actions. Well, my brother's lawyer is the lawyer for the trust and is paid from the trust, so it isn't costing my brother any money directly, just time and dealing with all this crap. Can the trust sue if you wanted to go that route?

Have you tried approaching your sister to ask her to stop? I did try that a few months ago and got a lovely go-off yourself as a response. Skeptical comment too. Yes, your brother is the trust. consumer for lost time and legal fees if he can clearly prove her actions have been frivolous. Oop, all right. I know the last thing he wants to do is to cost the trust any more money so he probably won't want to go that route, but I'll bring it up as an option. Thank you. Update 2.

So, right near five years have passed since my update on my sister doing her best to manipulate her way into getting her hands on our grandparents, substantial, assets. This is the final update because both grandparents have passed, and my brother filed the final tax return for the trust last month which was the last thing needed to settle it. Here's what happened. Grant suffered a stroke several months after my last update. Because it happened at an assisted living facility just down the street from a major hospital, he was able to initially survive. My brother felt it was only right to inform our sister, I didn't agree. She took his call, thanked him for calling, and never came to the hospital. My brother and I sat in the ICU in shifts for days with Gramps. Gramps held on for several

months, was even able to return to live with his wife, but he was obviously not the same and pneumonia took him in the end. His death pretty much sent Grammy over the edge. Her Alzheimer's progressed quickly after she lost Gramps and needed to be moved to the memory unit. Grammy held on for years. Namonia took her the summer before the pandemic. My sister never visited our grandparents after my last update. She didn't give up on her quest to be a terrible person, though. Lawyer number four lasted over three years. They settled into a rhythm of sending frequent demand emails to the trust lawyer for copies of checks, proof that estate properties were insured, trust bank records, anything they were technically entitled to review due to my sister

being a beneficiary. Anytime a property had a necessary repair, i.e. plumbing issue causing sewage to leak in a house, my sister would have her lawyer demand copies of everything, insist on getting multiple quotes for time-sensitive work, anything to drag the process out. Every year when my brother would submit the trust accounting, weeks of work would follow due to her demanding clarification on every medical bill or questioning why Grammy needed $100 worth of clothing from Target or whatever random tidbit she'd latch on to, all one at a time, dragging everything out. She also discovered that she could file complaints in probate court. The judge would say, the complaints to mediation. My brother wouldn't agree to anything in mediation, and my sister would

have her lawyer withdraw the filing. This happened multiple times. The trust legal costs were staggering as a result of all of this. When Grammy passed, the trust law firm submitted an equitable distribution proposal to my sister's lawyer, including her outstanding debts, which she never attempted to repay to the trust, and which she continued to deny in spite of the documentation my brother had. brother even offered to reduce the amount she owed if she wanted to take one of the real estate properties she'd previously expressed interest in so he wouldn't have to deal with selling it. She refused the proposal if any of her debts were included. There was some back and forth for a couple months, then she went quiet for a bit. Then came lawyer number five. The trust lawyer

assumed, probably correctly, that lawyer number four realized his easy payday of sending nasty emails and filing motions that would go nowhere was over and stopped representing her. So she got a new guy, and my brother had to start the whole process over. This new lawyer came to the table with only my sister's version of the story, including some new embellishments about my brother hiding my grandparents from her, and never knowing where they were, their health status, if they were even alive. The new lawyer really latched onto that part. The trust lawyer had told my brother early on to shoot them an email with any updates or changes

to my grandparents status slash location, such as hospitalizations or ER trips or transfers to different assisted living accommodations and he always did so. The lawyer who took the lead on the handling the trust said it was hilariously satisfying to provide copies of my brother's emails to her and her subsequent emails to whichever lawyer my sister was on with said updates to lawyer number five. He suddenly had a more pleasant demeanor. This is already long, so I'll simplify the next several months, late 2019 to early 2020.

$20. Sister at first refused distribution proposal. Trust lawyer simply submitted the proposal to probate court for them to approve. Sister was suddenly fine with accepting the proposal. She asked for cash distribution less her debts. No property in kind. Brother takes the rental property in kind, asks if I had interest in the vacation property our sister had previously wanted but no longer did. I have good memories there, decide to accept the offer so I can visit

the property and so my brother can still use it. Everyone signs the distribution agreements, papers are filed in court, and it's done. My brother sells the remaining real estate property, a townhome my grandparents lived in before entering assisted living, and cuts checks for the cash distribution. And, we haven't heard a word from our sisters since, not in any form. She deposited her check immediately and that was that. It's so anticlimactic after all the hassle she caused over the last five years. The only thing she accomplished with these years of greed was to cost the trust something like $600,000 in legal and related fees. That's money that would have been split among the three of us. She cost herself over $200,000 for nothing. She didn't even take the vacation property she had

claimed to want so badly. Despite everything my brother offered it to her first because it apparently held so much sentimental value. Apparently once she saw the appraisal on it from 2000, it wasn't that sentimental to her. It appraised it $90,000. It's not some fancy resort property or something, just a small vacation home in a pretty area. I guess it's a happy enough resolution, all things considered. I was able to pay off my small amount of student debt from undergrad and I'll be able to pay for grad school. I elected to take a year off to work in a non-profit and then, pandemic, with a little nest egg. I have a cute vacation house that's now suddenly worth a whole lot more, but I'm not counting on its valuation staying where it is. My brother and I just use it for

its intended purpose. My brother elected to take the rental property as part of his share and after all the crap he's had to deal with he definitely deserves the rental income. I helped him where I could in all this mess, and I attended the mediation meetings with him to speak on behalf of the trust, but he did the hard work. My brother and I are cool. We're friends, even. He forgave me for being an utteress all those years ago and I get to be the cool uncle now. I'm not even sure if any of the same posters are still active in this sub, but if you were around then, thanks for the brutal honesty and for explaining what was going on before I made any terrible mistakes. I hope you enjoy this story. My spouse's sibling presented evidence to me that my spouse was unfaithful with her partner,

so when I challenged her, she altered the security measures on my residence and notified the authorities. On me, now everyone says I should forgive her. Hi everyone, I'm David, 34M, and this is probably one of the hardest things I've ever had to talk about. So, where do I even start? Well, I guess I'll start from the day I got that message from Rose, 36F, my wife Alice's, 32F, older sister. It was about six months ago when everything came crashing down on me. I had just finished a long day at work, and I remember getting home, pouring myself a drink, and thinking it was going to be another normal evening. Little did I know, my entire world was about to change. I got a text from Rose, which wasn't totally out of the blue since our families are pretty close, but this message

hit differently. She simply asked if we could meet up in person. Now, I'm not the kind of person who jumps to conclusions, but something in my gut told me that this was serious. I asked her what it was about, and all she said was, it's about Alice and Terry. That immediately made me feel uneasy. Terry, 39M, is Rose's husband, and I had always liked the guy. We weren't super close or anything, but I had no reason to suspect anything shady until then. We met up the next day at a coffee shop. I still remember how tense she looked like she hadn't slept in days. Rose didn't waste any time, she just pulled out her phone and showed me a series of texts and pictures between Alice and Terry. My heart sank immediately.

I was staring at undeniable proof that my wife had cheated on me with her sister's husband. There were messages like, last night was amazing, can't wait to see you again, and even worse, photos of them together. Not just flirty pictures, but intimate ones that were enough to make me feel physically sick. It was like the wind had been knocked out of me, I didn't even know what to say to her at that moment. I think I just sat there in silence for what felt like an eternity, trying to process what I had just seen. The shock was overwhelming.

The weird thing is, I had zero suspicions up until that point. Alice and I have been together for nearly three years, married for one, and I thought we were solid. Sure, we had our ups and downs like any couple, but nothing that would ever make me think she'd cheat. Especially not with Terry, of all people. I thanked Rose for telling me and left the coffee shop feeling completely numb. I remember sitting in my car for a while, just staring at the steering wheel, trying to wrap my head around at all. The drive home was a blur. My mind was racing with questions how long had this been going on. Why? Was it something I did? Did they think

they could just get away with it. When I got home, Alice was sitting on the couch, scrolling through her phone like it was any other day. I walked in, and the moment she saw my face, I think she knew. I didn't have to say much, I just asked her point blank, did you sleep with Terry? She froze. That split second of hesitation was all I needed to confirm what I already knew. She started crying, saying it wasn't what I thought, but when I pressed her, she finally admitted that it had happened a couple of times. I was furious and hurt and just, broken. She kept apologizing, saying it was a mistake, that she didn't know what she was thinking, but honestly, her words felt empty. How do you accidentally sleep with someone multiple times? It didn't make

sense to me. She tried to explain that it happened when we were going through a rough patch, but honestly, we all have rough patches, and cheating is never the solution. I couldn't even look at her. That night, I packed a bag and left. I didn't know where I was going or what I was going to do, but I knew I couldn't stay there and pretend everything was okay. It was like our entire marriage had been one big lie, and I didn't know how to come back from that.

The fact that she betrayed me with Terry someone who was practically family made it even worse. It didn't just destroy my marriage, it wrecked roses two. Two families, are torn apart because of one selfish decision. And I think this is where I made the biggest mistake. I shouldn't have left the house that night. I was so hurt and angry, I wasn't thinking straight. I just wanted to get away from Alice, to put some distance between us so I could breathe. In hindsight, walking out was the worst thing I could have done because the house we live and isn't just some random place we bought together. It's been in my family for generations.

My grandparents live there, and my parents passed it down to me when they moved to a retirement community last year, right around the time Alice and I got married. I had always pictured raising our future kids there, and now, because of one terrible decision, it felt like everything was falling apart. When I finally calmed down after a few days and realized I needed to go back and figure things out, I drove back to the house. I figured we'd at least have a conversation about what comes next whether that meant marriage counseling, separation, or something else. But when I got there, I found out Alice had already changed the locks. I'm standing at the front door, fumbling with my

keys, thinking maybe I was so stressed I just forgot how to unlock my own house. But no, she actually went behind my back, called a locksmith, and changed all the locks. I I knocked on the door, and when Alice opened it, she just stood there with this cold, emotionless look on her face, like I was a stranger. I couldn't believe it. I asked her what the hell she thought she was doing, locking me out of my own house, my family's house, no less. She shrugged and said something like, you left, so I thought you weren't coming back.

It wasn't just the words, it was how casually she said it like it was no big deal. as if locking me out of my own home was a reasonable thing to do after she was the one who cheated. It was unreal. I told her I wanted to come inside and talk, but she refused. She wouldn't even let me step foot in the doorway. I'm standing there, trying to explain that this is my house and I have every right to be inside, and she just cuts me off and tells me if I don't leave, she'll call the cops. I thought she was bluffing, honestly.

I mean, we've been married for years. I couldn't imagine she'd actually call the police on me. But sure enough, about five minutes later, two patrol cars pull up in front of the house, and before I know it, I'm talking to the police. Alice had told them that I was being physically threatening, which was a complete lie. I hadn't even raised my voice, let alone lay to hand on her. But in situations like that, the police don't take any chances. They listened to both of us, but they were pretty clear that, for my own sake, it was better if I just left.

They suggested I get a lawyer, deal with the situation legally, and avoid any further confrontation. I couldn't believe this was happening. I was the one who had been cheated on, the one who had been betrayed, and somehow, I was the one being forced out of my own home. But I wasn't about to fight the cops on the front lawn and end up in jail. So, I left. I went straight to my best friend's place, where I crashed on his couch for a few days while I figured out my next steps. The first thing I did was find a lawyer. I told them everything, and they helped me file for divorce.

Not only that, but we're also taking Alice to court to get her out of my house. Legally, the house belongs to me. There's paperwork showing it's a family property passed down to me, but because she's my wife and we've lived there together for a while, it's not as simple as just kicking her out. It's a process and a messy one at that. To make things worse, Alice has been trying to paint me as the bad guy. She's telling people that I abandoned her after we had an argument, conveniently leaving out the part where she cheated on me with her sister's husband. She's even made me out to be aggressive, which is absurd to anyone who knows me. I'm not that guy. I've never been that guy. But now,

I feel like I'm stuck defending myself, not just in court, but to everyone around us. But this wasn't it? After I filed the case, that's when Alice started talking about working things out. You know how ironic that is, right? I mean, she didn't seem too interested in working things out when she was sneaking around with Terry. But now, all of a sudden, she's desperate to fix things. She started sending me texts and leaving voicemails, saying she made a mistake. and that we should try counseling. She was practically begging me to give her another chance.

But at that point, I was done. I didn't want to hear any of it. Work things out anymore. I wanted her out of my life, and most importantly, out of my house. I thought cutting her off would be the end of it, but oh man, was I wrong? That decision turned into a whole new mess. Now, members from both sides of the family are telling me that I'm the one in the wrong. Like, seriously, I'm the one who got cheated on, and somehow, I'm the bad guy. I got a call from my sister a few days ago, and it didn't go the way I expected. I figured she'd be supportive, right? But instead, she's telling me that marriage is complicated, and I should at least try to hear Alice out.

She hit me with the classic, if you really love her. her, you'd forgive her. I didn't know whether to laugh or throw my phone across the room. Like, what part of she slept with her sister's husband are people not understanding? It's not like she forgot to take the trash out or we had a fight about who does the dishes. This was a full-on betrayal, something that shattered every bit of trust one had in her, and it's not like it happened once in a moment of weakness, either. She admitted it happened multiple times. That's not a mistake, that's a decision a conscious choice she made, knowing full well what it would do to me, to Rose, to all of us. How the hell do you come back from that? It's crazy how quick people are to jump to

her defense now that I'm not willing to work it out. Suddenly, I'm the one who's not being reasonable. My sister went on about how marriages go through tough times, and cheating can sometimes be a wake-up call for both partners to work on their relationship. Like, am I supposed to be grateful she cheated because now we can fix our marriage. It was such a twisted take that I almost couldn't believe what I was hearing. And it's not just my sister. Alice's parents have been blowing up my phone too. Her mom keeps texting me about how family is important, and that Alice regrets what she did. She said something about how I should remember the vows we took, as if I'm the one who broke them. It's wild to me that everyone seems to think I'm the one who should be doing the forgiving, the compromise,

the bending over backward to save this marriage. Meanwhile, Alice is the one who sets the whole thing on fire. The craziest part. Even my parents have chimed in, and they've always been pretty hands-off when it comes to my personal life. My mom called and said she understood how hurt I was, but that maybe I should consider giving Alice another chance, especially since we've been together for so long. She said something like, it's hard to throw away all those years over a mistake. I get where she's coming from, but it's not just about the years.

It's about the fact that the person I thought I could trust the most lie to my face, repeatedly. And not just any lies she slept with someone who's basically family. It's a betrayal on so many levels, I don't even know how to explain it to people. I tried explaining this to my sister, and you know what she said. Everyone makes mistakes. You have to decide if her mistake is bigger than your love for her. your love for her. And honestly, that pissed me off more than anything. Like, it's not about how much I loved her. I did love her, with everything I had. But that love isn't some magical thing

that erases what she did. There are consequences for actions, and she's facing those consequences now. I'm not going to sacrifice my self-respect and sanity just because we have history together. Another thing that everyone loves to bring up lately is the complicated relationship Alice's parents had. I swear. It feels like every conversation turns into some weird therapy session where I'm supposed to unpack her family's baggage instead of focusing on what she did to our marriage. Alice's mom cheated on her dad for years. And I'm not talking about one affair or a single bad decision she had multiple affairs with different men over the course of their marriage. Alice told me about this when we first got together, and I felt sorry for her back then.

I can't imagine what it must have been like growing up in that environment, knowing your mom was stepping out on your dad and watching the tension unfold in the house. Apparently, her dad knew about it but never did anything, which honestly blows my mind. He just stayed, turned a blind eye, and acted like everything was fine. I don't know how he managed that, but Alice said he was trying to keep the family's together. Over time, though, it destroyed him. She mentioned that he became more distant, stopped really engaging with the family, and eventually, just checked out emotionally. Her parents stayed married, but they were more like roommates by the end. Alice always said

her mom was the controlling one, and her dad was too passive to stand up to her, so the cheating went on and on without any real consequences. Now, Alice and her relatives are using this as some sort of justification for her cheating on me, like, because she grew up in a household where infidelity was just swept under the rug that somehow excuses her behavior. That's the part that really drives me crazy. They want me to be understanding and considerate of her trauma, but at the end of the day, I didn't cheat on her. She's the one who did this, and somehow, I'm the one who's supposed to be empathetic and

forgiving. Alice even said something like, you know how messed up my childhood was, as if that's supposed to make everything okay. And don't get me wrong, I understand that growing up in a toxic environment can mess with your sense of relationships and boundaries. But that doesn't give you a free pass to hurt other people. I didn't marry her mom. I married her. And I had no idea that she would repeat the same mistakes she swore she hated watching as a kid. Her family, especially her mom, keeps trying to convince me that this isn't really who Alice is that she's just acting out of unresolved issues from her childhood. They say things like, she's still learning how to have a

healthy relationship, or she's afraid of losing love, just like her dad did. Honestly, it feels like they're making excuses for her. And what kills me is that they expect me to stick around and help her figure it out. It's like, just because her dad stayed in a marriage full of betrayal doesn't mean I should, too. I feel like no one is actually in my corner. Everyone keeps telling me that me to be the bigger person, to try and understand where Alice is coming from. But what about where I'm coming from? I'm the one who got cheated on. I'm the one who got blindsided by the person I thought I'd spend the rest of my life with. Yet, somehow, all the sympathy is going to Alice because of her trauma. It's honestly exhausting. So yeah, here I am, stuck in this weird

limbo where it feels like the entire world is on Alice's side, and I'm just out here, trying to figure out how to get my life back on track. Honestly, I feel like I'm losing my mind. Any advice would be appreciated because right now, I feel like I'm drowning. Update 1, hi everyone. First off, I just want to say thank you for all your kind words and suggestions. I honestly didn't expect so many responses, and it's been overwhelming in a good way. I've been feeling so lost like I'm the only one going through this, but hearing from you all made me realize I'm not as alone as I thought. Some of you suggested I reach out to Rose, and I thought, why not? I hadn't really spoken to her since this whole mess exploded. We were both in such a bad

place, dealing with our own versions of the same nightmare. So, I took your advice and gave her a call. Rose said she's been getting a lot of the same pressure from family and friends that I've been dealing with. People tell her that forgiveness is key and that she should consider giving Terry another chance, especially because of their kids. That blew my mind. Like, how do people think that's even a reasonable suggestion after what they did? But Rose, being the badass that she is, said she's blocked all those people and is fully committed to moving on. She's not about to let anyone guilt her into staying in a toxic situation, and honestly, I respect the hell out of that. Talking to her made me feel a little better like I wasn't crazy for wanting out of this mess.

She gets it. She's living through the same nightmare, and she's handling it with so much strength. She told me, you've got to do what's best for you. Don't let anyone make you feel like you're in the wrong for wanting to protect your peace. And I really needed to hear that. With everyone in my ear telling me I should forgive Alice, it's been hard to trust my own feelings. But hearing Rose say she's ready to move on gave me some clarity. It reminded me that I don't have to justify my decision to anyone, not Alice, not our families, and certainly not to people who don't know the full story. Rose also said something that really stuck with me. She said that the longer you hold on to the hope of fixing something that's already broken beyond repair, the more you lose yourself. I could hear in her voice that she was done losing herself for the sake of a marriage that wasn't worth saving anymore.

and I realized I needed to start thinking the same way. I've been stuck in this emotional limbo, second-guessing every decision, and worrying about what everyone else thinks, and it's been tearing me apart. But Rose made it clear there's nothing wrong with choosing yourself over a relationship that's damaged beyond fixing. I told Rose about all the pressure I've been getting from my own family and Alice's relatives. She laughed in that I know exactly what you're going through kind of way and said it's the same for her. People always have opinions, but at the end of the day, they're not the ones who

have to live with the consequences. She told me that people tried to guilt-trip her by saying she wasn't thinking about her kids or her family's reputation, but she shut that down quickly. She said, the best thing I can do for my kids is show them that it's okay to walk away from something that's toxic. Honestly, that hit me hard. I don't have kids, but the message is still the same sometimes walking away is the healthiest option, no matter what people say. I've been so worried about what others might think or say about me divorcing Alice, especially since they've been guilt-tripping me with all this talk about love, forgiveness, and loyalty. But talking to Rose reminded me that I can't live my life based on other people's expectations. I've got to do

what's best for me, even if it means upsetting a few people along the way. Thanks again to everyone who encouraged me to reach out to her. It really made a difference. Update 2. Hi everyone. Some of you were curious about how exactly Rose found out about the affair, and it's actually an interesting and pretty messed up story. It wasn't some dramatic confrontation or a random confession.

She basically uncovered the whole thing like a detective. So here's how it went down. Alice and Terry work in offices that are really close to each other, almost adjacent. So, it wasn't weird for them to grab lunch together or hang out during their breaks. In fact, Rose never really thought anything of it because they both work in the same industry, and they've known each other for years. She trusted them, and why wouldn't she? Alice was her sister, and Terry was her husband.

It wasn't like Rose was looking for any signs of trouble at least, not at first. But then, Rose started noticing some strange transactions on Terry's credit. card. There was this recurring charge that showed up every week. It wasn't a huge amount, just a few dollars here and there, but it was near both their offices. At first, she assumed it was a restaurant. Terry told her he was grabbing lunch with co-workers sometimes, and with Alice's office being so close, she figured they were just grabbing a quick bite together. It was normal, right? Nothing suspicious. But Rose couldn't shake the feeling that something was off. The charges were consistent, happening like clockwork every week.

She brushed it off for a while, not wanting to jump to conclusions. But then one day, when she was picking Terry up from work, he dropped his car off at the mechanic or something. She saw the name again on a sign. Except, it wasn't in a restaurant. It was in a hotel. When she saw that, everything clicked. I can't even imagine what you. what was going through her mind at that moment. She told me that her stomach just dropped, and she got this overwhelming sense of dread. I mean, how could she not? All those small charges that she thought were for lunch suddenly had a much more sinister explanation.

At that point, she knew something was seriously wrong, but she didn't confront Terry right away. she waited until they got home. That night, after Terry fell asleep, Rose checked his phone. She didn't want to, but she couldn't just sit with that feeling in her gut without knowing for sure. And sure enough, she found everything. Texts, pictures, videos, everything. Alice and Terry weren't just having an emotional affair or meeting up for coffee like she'd hoped. It was so much worse. They'd been sneaking off to that hotel regularly, and the text left no doubt about what was going on. From the way she described it, it was all right there in black and white intimate conversations,

plans to meet up, even photos that made her want to throw up. Rose told me that it was one of those moments where your whole world just shatters in front of you. She couldn't believe it. Her own sister. Her husband. She said she didn't sleep at all that night, just stayed up screaming. scrolling through the messages, trying to wrap her head around how the two people closest to her could betray her like that.

The next morning, she didn't even confront Terry. She needed to talk to me first. And that's when she told me. Also, for those of you asking about Alice's parents and where they are now, that's a bit of a complicated story in itself. Alice's dad passed away a few years ago. From what Alice told me back when we first started dating, her dad was a good guy. but he wasn't exactly the type to stand up for himself. He knew about Alice's mom cheating on him for years, but he never left her.

He just kind of let it happen like he was too tired to fight or didn't have the energy to change things. It's sad, really, because from what Alice said, it wore him down over time. By the end, he wasn't the same man he used to be. When Alice's dad passed away, Alice and her mom didn't have much of a relationship left. They had drifted apart over the years, and Alice never forgave her mom for how she treated her dad. I remember Alice telling me how much she resented her mom for being so manipulative and selfish. It was a huge point of tension in their family, and it definitely affected Alice growing up. Her mom was this overbearing, controlling person who thought she could do whatever she wanted,

and Alice always said she wanted to be nothing like her. That's the part that really stings in all of this Alice spent so much time talking about how she never wanted to follow in her mom's footsteps, how she hated the idea of being someone who could cheat and hurt the people who loved her. And yet, here we are. It's like she ended up becoming the very person she swore she wouldn't be. I don't know if it's because of the way she was raised, or if it's just an excuse people are trying to make for her now, but it's hard not to see the parallels. As for Alice's mom, she's still around, but they have no contact anymore. Alice cut her off a few years ago. It happened slowly at first Alice would stop visiting

as often, and their phone calls became less frequent. Eventually, there was a big blow-up between them over something that had been brewing for a long time. I wasn't there for the argument, but Alice told me afterward that she'd had enough of her mom's manipulative ways and didn't want her in her life anymore. Honestly, I didn't blame her at the time. Her mom sounded like a piece of work, always trying to guilt trip Alice into feeling sorry for her, even though she was the one who destroyed their family. Update 3, Hi guys. I know it's been months since I last posted, but I've finally got some updates, and let me tell you, it's been a roller coaster. The whole legal process dragged on for what felt like forever, but I'm relieved to say it's finally over. That was a huge relief. Alice tried to

argue that she deserved part of it because she lived here during our marriage, but the fact that it's been in my family for so long worked in my favor. But I won't lie, there were some stressful moments during this whole process. Alice tried to play dirty at times, throwing accusations around and trying to paint me as the bad guy. At one point, she even hinted that I had been emotionally neglectful in the marriage, which, honestly, felt like a low blow. I mean, I wasn't perfect, but who is? all have our moments, but I was never anything but faithful and committed to her, even when things got tough. I thought we were a team. I guess in her mind, that justified what she did, but for me, it only made it harder to keep my composure when we had to face each other in court.

In the end, though, the judge saw through all of it. The ruling came down, and it was pretty clear cut. The house is legally mine, and Alice had no real claim to it. She was ordered to to move out, and, I have to admit, watching her pack up and leave was one of the most surreal moments of my life. There was part of me that felt relief like a weight had been lifted but there was also this weird sense of finality that hit me. It was like the last chapter of this crazy, painful story was closing, and as much as I wanted to move on, it felt strange to watch someone I once loved walk out of my life for good.

We're officially divorced now, which, honestly, feels good to say. still weird when I catch myself thinking of her as my ex-wife instead of just Alice, but I guess that's normal when you've been with someone for so long. The only downside is that I do have to pay alimony. I wasn't thrilled about that part, but it's just the way the legal system works, I guess. She's not working full-time right now, and even though I'm not happy about supporting her financially after everything she did, it's a small price to pay to have her out of my life. Thank you all for your advice and support through this mess I really appreciate it.