Reddit Stories - Episode #19 - The Most Unbelievable AITA Posts Bedtime ( Over 9 Hour Compilation )

Episode Date: November 6, 2025

#redditstories #sleep #sleepstories #bedtimestories #fallasleep #aita #unbelievablestories #relaxingstories #sleepcompilation Drift off with Episode 19 – The Most Unbelievable AITA Posts Bedtime. This 9-hour relaxing mix shares the most shocking, funny, and emotional Reddit AITA stories ever told, narrated softly to quiet your mind, ease your stress, and guide you into a deep, undisturbed night’s sleep. Tags: redditstories, sleepstories, fallasleep, bedtimestories, relaxingconfessions, aitastories, unbelievablestories, shockingposts, emotionalreddit, relaxingpodcast, soothingvoice, bedtimeaudio, peacefulstories, unwindstories, calmingnarration, nightrelaxation, sleeplistening, sleepbetter, sleepnarrationBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. My sibling referred to my child as an error during her celebration of impending parenthood, prompting me to disclose that she is in fact a relative, and that she is the undisclosed child of my mother's former partner, unbeknownst to my father. About. My sister, Melissa, 28F, and I, 31F, already never had a very good relationship and we mostly just attended each other's events and stuff for the sake of appearances. But at her baby shower recently, she made a very horrible remark about my son and I ended up spilling

the beans on her and basically just revealed that she's not even family. This is something that I had known for many years and it finally came out and now, things are going really badly for my family and they're blaming me for it. I don't think that it's fair for them to do that, especially when they have never stood up for me when they had to. I have been used to her sly gibes and stuff about my marriage for quite some time now and usually, I just ignore it because I know that she's doing it for attention and I don't want to give her the satisfaction of getting a response out of me. But recently, she dragged my son into it,

and that was the last straw. For context, I have a three-year-old son with my husband, but we got married just last year. And I don't think it's as problematic or shameful as she makes it out to be either because I think we made a good decision since my husband and I had only been together for six or seven months when I conceived my son. We were not ready to get married at the time, so we decided to take it slow, and instead of getting married because I was pregnant, we decided to continue seeing each other and take things at our own pace. Things worked out well because even after I found out about the pregnancy, we kept getting to know each other better, and then, after my son was born, he moved in with us. Then, after having stayed together for

quite a while, we decided to get married last year. I don't know how this is any of her concern, but she just likes to make comments about this and make me out to be some sort of a moral or unethical person just because I had a child out of wedlock which is such an outdated idea that I don't even feel the need to dignify it with a response. It's not like I couldn't have said anything if I wanted to because trust me, if she had as to how she became a part of the family, she never would have had the audacity to talk to me that way. But unfortunately, I never spoke up about it because I did not want to hurt my mom. I accidentally found out some things a couple of years ago, but by then, my parents were happy, and Melissa had already been a part of our family for her entire life, and my mom literally went down on her knees and begged me not to spill the beans on her big secret.

So out of respect for her, I didn't say anything for a very long time, but this time, at the baby shower, I just couldn't hold back anymore. Before getting into Melissa and her thing, I feel like I have to mention what happened at the baby shower. So once everyone had arrived and we were all talking and stuff, Melissa stood very close to me with a group of her friends and started talking real loud. She was telling them about how she had known her husband for three years before she got married to him and they waited for two years before they decided to get pregnant. After explaining the timeline to them, she started telling them that she had planned her future with her husband very carefully because she wanted to make sure that

everything was on track and they did not have any surprises. Because the last thing that she was wanted was for her first child to be a mistake, since that would really derail her plans and she didn't want to end up like a certain somebody. I guess it's easy to understand why it was the last straw for me because before this, at least she had the decency to keep her insults very tame and it was very easy for me to ignore them. But this one was not like that, this time, what she said was very disgusting and the implication that my son had been a mistake who had derailed my life, I did not like it. Besides, my husband and my son were right there besides. me and they had heard everything as well, which really upset me even more.

So I just snapped and addressed her directly and then I told her that she wouldn't be talking so much if she knew about her own story and then just got into it before my mom could stop me. Very frankly, I wasn't even thinking about how this would reflect on my mom because for so many years, even though I had kept a secret to myself, she had never stood up for me or told Melissa to cut it out. So I just went ahead full throttle and that's how everybody found out that Melissa isn't actually my sister. She's my cousin and my mom adopted her when she was six months old. And I don't think that the guests would have found that so scandalous if that was the worst of it, but unfortunately, there was more. My aunt being Melissa's real biological mother was still fine,

but it was the identity of the father that really had people shocked. Melissa's dad, and a huge part of the reason my mom adopted her, was my mom's ex-boyfriend from high school and the only man she had dated before she met my dad. The cherry on top was the fact that my mom had basically manipulated my father into adopting Melissa by telling him that her sister was just 22 and she was not ready to take on the responsibility of being a mother. So she made it seem like she was doing something very kind and that's how they ended up adopting Melissa.

But the darker truth was that my mom just wanted an excuse to stay in touch with her ex and up until a couple of years back. I know for a fact that she was still in touch with him about this. I don't want to get into the details of it, but basically, my mom and her ex broke up after high school, and then, in college, she met my dad and started dating him and after graduation, she got married to him. But I guess they were never really able to get over each other and soon enough, her ex hooked up with his sister which is messy as it is. I don't even know how that ended up happening, but that's none of my business. Anyway, they were involved with each other for a couple of months and that's how my aunt ended up pregnant with Melissa but she wasn't ready to. for a child, so she requested my mom to adopt the baby. The problem is that my mom pretty much

already had her hands full with me because I was three at the time, which is pretty young, and she wasn't ready for a second child. So that's when her ex decided to step in, he told her that it was his baby and he requested her and then she finally gave in. She somehow convinced my dad to adopt Melissa and that's how she became a part of the family. Obviously, I don't really remember any of this because like I said, I was just three years old back then, so even I had no clue that Melissa was not my biological sister, she had been adopted. We were both raised to believe that we were bio-sisters and after my aunt passed away in a car accident three years after Melissa was born, there was nobody to contradict our parents either. So we grew up believing that she was

my sister until my mom accidentally left her phone unlocked a couple of years back and I ended up reading a few of her messages while she was talking to her ex. Back then, I did not know that it was her ex. I just knew that it was some guy asking about Melissa, talking about how much his daughter had grown up and trying to grab lunch with my mom and also telling her to bring Melissa with her because he believed that it was finally time for her to find out the truth. My mom hadn't replied, but I scrolled up and I saw that she had been in touch with this guy for a while and I found it very suspicious. So I confronted her about it and that's how the entire story came out. My dad was obviously aware of the fact that Melissa was his sister

in-law's daughter, not his wife's, but she had been very clever and excluded the fact that it was actually her ex's daughter as well. The two sisters had told my dad that some random guy she had a one-night stand with was actually the father of the baby, and that didn't raise any alarms with my dad, so he was blissfully unaware of everything until I brought it up at the baby shower. This shocked Melissa, and to top it off, I decided to taunt her about how she had made an even bigger mistake than my son, so she should probably look into her own life story first. It was intentional, I won't lie, and I knew that it was going to cause a lot of trouble for everyone in my family, but I honestly couldn't care less about it.

And right now, Melissa is not talking to my parents and has even rescinded their invitation to the wedding. Back when I left the baby shower, she looked pretty furious and she was having a hysterical temper tantrum, so this isn't surprising. However, I really didn't see my parents' divorce coming because apparently, after the baby shower, my mom and my dad got into a really big fight at the baby shower itself about the whole thing with her ex. Because of course, he had no clue about that detail, and for the past couple of years, even after I had found out about it, I hadn't breathed a word of it because my mom had promised me that

she had nothing going on with him. She even told me that the only reason she had responded to him recently was because he had been pestering her for months about Melissa and being a parent herself, she didn't think it was right to continue ignoring him. Apart from that, she told me that whatever feelings she had had for him at the beginning of her marriage, were gone, and now, all she loved and valued was my dad. So for the sake of that, I kept her secret, but now, I don't think that I should care because clearly, they didn't care about me, which is why they never stood up for me when Melissa was blatantly insulting and humiliating in public.

Part of it is my fault, too, I never stood up for myself either, but that's just just because I did not want to create any drama and embarrass my family. I knew that at the end of the day, they were going to try and blame me, which is why my mom is going out of her way right now to pin everything on me. She's been sending me text after text, telling me that I've ruined everything for her, because her daughter isn't speaking to her and her husband has moved out and is demanding a divorce, all because she tried to do something good for her sister and she's claiming that my little ego-driven outburst ruined everything. Believe it or not, I do feel a little guilty because it's true that her life is pretty much in shambles right now and that's just because I lost my temper.

Of course, none of my friends or my husband thinks that I did anything wrong, but still, I feel like I need to get a second opinion. Ida for revealing my mom's secrets and ruining her life out of anger? Edit, guys, I'm not really sure about what exactly went wrong with my mom's relationship, and I also didn't think it was relevant in the context of the story, so I didn't include it. But anyway, this is what she told me, she said that she had to break up with her ex because they couldn't do the whole distance thing and they were going to different colleges after high school. After she met my dad, she really liked him, but she still had feelings for her ex so things

were a bit complicated. Eventually, she chose my dad because she thought that he could provide a more stable lifestyle compared to her ex, who was more on the party animal side of things. And from what my mom told me, it was apparently at some party that her ex was. her ex bumped into my sister and they ended up hooking up. Of course, she was not happy about it in the beginning and that's why she was very hesitant to adopt their daughter, but even after she got married, she felt like she still had some lingering feelings for her ex.

Which is why he was able to convince her to adopt Melissa, but she knew that my dad wouldn't like it if he got to find out about it so she kept that a secret from him. Now this is whatever my mom had told me when I confronted her about the messages. But you guys can take it with a pinch of salt because things might be. have been different. It's just that I don't know anybody else who would be able to tell me the truth so my mom's word is all that I have to go on right now. Anyway, since a lot of you have been asking about what exactly went on with my mom, dad, this is basically the gist of whatever she told me. Update 1, hi, thanks for the comments and stuff. I really needed to hear that because I had been

feeling very guilty about whatever was going on with my mom, but now I don't, not so much. It's been a week since the baby shower and my sister is still not speaking to anyone from the family, but they only have themselves to blame for that. My parents are both upset with me, but mostly my mom, because a couple of days ago, my dad finally sent over the divorce papers. She's been living separately ever since they fought at the baby shower and until recently, I hadn't blocked my mother, so she had kept messaging me and telling me that she blames me for everything that I had ruined her life.

I don't know what she was expecting me to do. It's not like I can take back everything that I had said at the baby shower, and all of a sudden, people would start pretending like everything was normal. Blaming me was only a waste of time for her, but I guess she just needed a place to vent, so she kept accusing me of ruining everything for her. Anyway, I had been feeling bad and a little confused, so I hadn't been able to block her but then, after reading the comments here, and after speaking to everybody who loves me, I realized

that I was doing the right thing. I had no reason to keep her secrets, especially when she never stood up for me, so she could be as mad as she wanted to, it hardly makes a difference to me anymore. I'm done covering up for her, and I don't care what happens with the family anymore. I don't have anything to do with them, they have never supported me in anything and I'm just done. From now on, I'm just going to keep focusing on my family, my husband, and my son, and that's it. Update 2. So it's been two weeks since the baby shower and my dad finally reached out to me today. Up until recently, he hadn't spoken to me directly, but I knew that he was also blaming me for

everything that was going wrong. Thanks to a bunch of his relatives, who had texted me to let me know that they had felt very disappointed by my behavior and they didn't think that I was the kind of person who would cover up for my mom, especially regarding something so serious. So I knew that he had been bad-mouthing me as well. even though he hadn't exactly come out and said it to me directly like my mom had. That's why when he reached out to me, I had literally no interest in speaking to him. But he just kept calling me, from other numbers when I blocked his number, and after a while,

I was forced to pick up the call since I knew that he was not going to let this go. When I answered, he told me that after everything that I had done, the least I could do was answer his phone calls and be civil to him. He said that he did not expect an apology from me because after all, I was my mom's daughter, but he still expected me to allow him to see his grandson. And under ordinary circumstances, I might have even agreed with him, just for the sake of it, but his tone was so nasty that instantly told him that I was not going to let my son see anybody from this family because pretty much everyone was just spineless and stupid.

For so long, they had never liked me, and now they expected me to be the perfect daughter for them. No chance of that happening, and I told him that I did not want anything to do with him anymore. Before he had the chance to argue with me, I just hung up the phone quickly. But when I got home, I saw that my dad was out there, waiting for me. I had picked up my son from my mother-in-law's place since she is the one who takes care of him while my husband and I are away at work, so since my son was with me, I did not want to get into any dramatic situation or worse, a fight with my dad. because my son obviously has no idea about all of the drama going on behind his back,

he still loves his grandparents and he was very happy to see his grandpa after a long time. He literally ran towards him and my dad picked him up and they played for a while we were standing outside my house since I had no idea what to do. It was a pretty awkward situation because I myself had no interest in speaking to my father or interacting with him in any way whatsoever, but it was clear that my son did not feel the same way. Anyway, after a couple of minutes, I unlocked the doors to the house and asked my son to go in and freshen up just so that I would have an excuse to speak to my dad in private. After my son left, I told my dad that my son was playing nice because he was just a child and had no idea what was

going on with the family, but I'm not a child anymore and everybody in the family has really hurt me. So right now, I don't want to interact with anyone and I asked him to leave. He got really annoyed and told me that this behavior did not make any sense to him because as far as he is concerned, he was the man who had been betrayed the most, not only by his life, but also by me. So the least I could do was at least pretend to be apologetic, even if I didn't feel that way in real life. But the way I was acting, like I had nothing to be sorry about, it was making him question whether he and my mother had raised me correctly at all. I told him very clearly that if he felt betrayed, that's how I had been feeling for the past many years. So my behavior right now was just

a culmination of those feelings and if he didn't approve of that, tough, because I had learned to behave this way from my parents. All throughout the past couple of years, they had very expertly turned a blind eye to Melissa constantly humiliating me every chance that she got. And nobody had the audacity to say anything to her, but now, all of a sudden, just because I've spilled a few secrets of the family, I'm the villain. Mind you, this is a family that has never cared for me much. So why exactly am I supposed to care about them? Obviously, my dad did not have an answer to these questions. He was stumped and I just went on speaking. I explained to him exactly how upset I had been when Melissa had made that comment about my son at the baby shower, calling him a

mistake, and even then, nobody had stood up for me or my son. So right now, the whole act, that he was putting up with really loving his grandson, I told him to just save it for somebody who would believe in it. I didn't doubt that my parents loved my son. Everyone did because he's just a kid and it's easy to love him. But at the end of today, I knew that the golden child's grandson would probably mean more to them than my son would after he was born. Besides, if the father could not even bring himself to defend or just speak up and say something at least when his dear grandson was being referred to as a mistake, then I don't think he had any business overstepping my boundaries and coming to visit his grandson when I had made it very clear that I did not approve of it right now.

That's all that I had to say, and he didn't seem to have anything to say in response or in defense, so I just walked to the door and shut it. I thought that he might try to come inside and meet my son again, but he didn't, and a couple of minutes later, when I looked through the window, he was gone. Later on, when my husband came back home, I told him everything about my interaction with my dad, and he told me that this had been a long time coming. My parents really love to pretend like they have been heard in the situation, but in reality, day after day, and they have never cared about it.

So this whole expectation from me, that I should always be a good daughter and put my family before myself every single time, had been drilled into my head subconsciously, but I'm breaking out of it now. I've already dealt with my father and made it clear to him that I'm not interested in speaking to him anymore, and if my mom contacts me again, she'll be hearing the same. Though, for now, I think she's keeping her distance from me, probably because she's busy with divorce and everything at the moment. It has been close to one month since I last spoke to anybody from my family, and that was my

dad. I kind of told him off in my last update and since then, he has had the good sense to stay away from me. Melissa and I have obviously had no contact since the day of the baby shower and I don't think any of us are worse off for it. I had blocked my mom, she kept her distance from me as well, but then, a couple of days ago, I started receiving messages from some anonymous accounts on Facebook and all of them were really hateful ones, telling me that I'm a horrible human being, absolutely worthless, and stuff like

that. Initially, it was a bit off-putting and I thought it was somebody playing a prank on me, but I know that none of my friends have such a terrible sense of humor. At first, it did not even occur to me that it might have been my mom because it seemed like a really far-fetched possibility. But right now? I don't think that it's so far-fetched because last night, my husband told me that he had been receiving messages like that all day from the same accounts. The catch is that he hadn't been receiving those same messages. Nobody was insulting him, but basically, he was being told terrible things about me.

In fact, my mom had even taken it up a notch and had been telling my husband that I'm a cheater, I sleep around and whatnot. Obviously, none of it is true. saying it to get under our skin but as soon as we figured out that it might have been my mom, we just started thinking of the whole thing as something really pathetic and it makes me feel ashamed that I'm even associated with this woman. This is my mom that we're talking about, she is in her 50s, for crying out loud, and this is not the kind of thing that she should be getting up to right now. And for what? Just because she hates me for spilling her secrets?

It's just sad and pathetic and it really goes to show that I didn't do anything wrong by telling everybody her reality. I don't even understand what she hopes to get from this. She's just being hateful for no reason and this is a waste of her time and energy. If we want to, we can report her and put an end to this, but honestly, that will be a waste of our time and energy because we really don't care. This reflects badly on her, it has nothing to do with us. I can tell that she has taken everything that has been happening really hard because this is some juvenile crap that she's pulling off and I wish I could say I was upset with her or angry about this, but I just feel bad for her because I can't believe that this is what my mom has been reduced to right now.

Update 4, hi, so it's been a couple of months since my last update, and today, I heard from an aunt of mine that my parents finalized their divorce last week. I was attending an engagement party and this was one of the first family events that I had attended ever since the baby shower, so I was kind of skeptical about going because I thought I might see my parents there, or worse, I might see Melissa. But I had to attend, I couldn't just skip it like every other event for the past couple of months, because it's my cousin who got engaged and she and I are kind of close. So she insisted that I come by and I agreed to drop in but when my aunt told me that neither of my parents were attending and Melissa had already declined the invitation, I stayed for longer and she

ended up telling me a lot of things about my family. I've not been in touch with them for a very long time, so I had no idea that the divorce had already been finalized. I feel kind of bad for them, but well, I knew this was coming. After my last update, where my mom had been sending me and my husband anonymous messages on Facebook to get on our nerves, we just ignored her for a couple of weeks and she stopped on her own. My dad did try to get in touch with me a couple of times, telling me that he really wanted to see his grandson but I did not reply. I didn't have anything to say to these people anymore, so I've just completely cut them out of my life. My aunt told me that she hasn't spoken to my mom in a very long time, and since she is from

my dad's side of the family, she doesn't really know what she has been up to, but she knows that my dad really misses me and even more than me. He misses his grandson. I felt kind of bad about that, so I feel like I might let him come see my son in a couple of days. Not because I want to fix things with him, but because I know that my son misses his grandpa as well. Out of all his grandparents, he got along with his grandpa and he's been asking about him a lot. I guess I can put my anger aside for his sake now, at least. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouses began to rest beside my mother four months following our marriage,

held me responsible for my father's passing, and then professed their affection for each other and expressed their desire to begin a family. 21F have been married to my husband, 33M, for a year and three months now. We got together when I was 18 and he was 30 while I was a senior in high school. To a lot of people our relationship is taboo, however, I've always been very mature for my age and it's always felt normal to both of us. My mother, 40F, has always had a soft spot for him which I appreciated. When she first met him, she told me I was so lucky to have an amazing person in my life. Throughout our relationship my mom and him got a long fine, which I've always thought may just be from their somewhat close.

closeness in age. However, during our wedding is when I started noticing weird behavior from my mom. On my wedding day, she told me she wished she was the one in the gown today, referring to my wedding dress. I asked her what she meant, and she just started laughing saying she said too much to drink. She also suggested her and my husband have a dance together during my wedding. I immediately laughed because I thought it was a joke, however, now of the current circumstances it was clearly not a joke. Further down the line, she would start asking me how he was in bed. I told her I didn't feel comfortable talking to her about that and she said that my aunt was curious. She also started asking my husband's sexual questions like what was his favorite position. What are his kinks?

If he had ever had a threesome? Genuinely uncomfortable questions that made me grossed out. My suspicion specifically grew throughout the last three months. My husband told me my mom, asked him to renovate her kitchen, he works in construction, and he would be over there after work Monday to Wednesday. When I offered to join him, he said it wasn't necessary and that it would boring for me. When I asked my mom if I should join as well, she said I was being a nagging wife asking to come over. However, when he started to visit my mom I noticed sexual changes in our relationship, as when he would come home from work or my mom's he would never be interested in doing it. My suspicions grew further when I visited my mom's place and the kitchen looked the same as before,

and when I confronted both of them they said they were still just prepping for the renovation. In this moment I knew something was wrong. I had an urge to know, so I left work early and decided to go by my mom's place and see what was happening. When I arrived, I wanted to see what they were up to naturally and didn't want them to be alarmed that I was there. Luckily my mom's place has a lot of windows and you can see nearly every room in the house. if you just wander around. When I got to the study's window, that's when I saw my husband and mother having sex on her desk.

I screamed and cried. When they saw me my mom looked down in complete disbelief while my husband ran out of the room. I wasn't there long but ran to my car and drove off hyperventilating. When I got home, I just started to pack some clothes and essentials and wanted to leave. I drove off and my phone started blowing up

from my husband, mother and auntie, assuming she knew. I drove to an empty car park and sat there for over four hours just crying and listening to music. I decided to return to my husband and I's home, as the tears I let go turned into complete anger and distrust. I wanted to confront him. When I arrived home, he was not there and there was also no sign he had even been at our place. I decided that I needed some sleep and thought that maybe he had just stayed in a motel for the night to give me space. When I woke up the next day I was going to call him, however, I thought to myself that I wasn't ready to speak to him. So I called back my auntie, and she told me that he stayed over at my mother's house to be there for her.

My mouth dropped and I couldn't even say a single word. My auntie had to keep asking if I was there. I told her if she could set up a meeting with myself, husband and my mother and she said she'll pick me up and take me to my mom's house to talk. When my auntie picked me up, she said that my mother told her about their affair and she told her to stop. My mother lied to her saying she had in yesterday straight after I caught them. She said my mother told her she'd been still seeing him and that I'd found out. I told my auntie I was disappointed she didn't tell me and that she's lost my trust, and she seemed to have understood that and complied. When we got to their house, my husband had his arm around my mother while she had her head rested on his shoulder.

Keep in mind, I caught them a day ago. My mother stated crying as soon. as she saw me and started hugging my husband. That in itself aggravated me. To keep this from not going any longer, they told me that they want to be together and they hope one day I'll accept them. I literally couldn't even feel anything so I just started laughing in shock. Even my auntie told my mom she was being ridiculous. They claimed that they've been in love for a year now and they started sleeping with each other four months after my husband and I got married. The craziest claim was that my mother said she sees herself starting a family with him. After they told me everything I sat in silence for a few minutes, and my mom pleaded that I say something. I couldn't. I asked my

auntie in that moment to take me home, and she got her keys and got me out of there immediately. As soon as I got in the car she hugged me and I started bawling, she said everything was going to be okay and that she was there for me no matter what. She offered that I stay with her, but I just wanted to be alone. It's been a week since that all happened and I've been at home alone just crying and drinking. I even had some really dark thoughts that honestly terrified me to the point I was going to check myself to the hospital. The worst part is that a part of me wishes I never saw them and lived completely oblivious to their affair. I don't have any friends or anyone in my life. The only person I had was my husband and now that's gone. My mother and I have always had

problems in the past as she blamed my father's suicide on me and even faked a suicide note from him saying it was my fault when I was 12. In a way, I think this is her way at getting back at me for my dad, as she truly believes that I was the reason he decided to end his life because I was an angry tween. My husband sees my mother as forbidden fruit, which is something that I believe men crave, which is why majority of the time they're the ones that cheat. I am now alone and to be honest have no clear direction for what's next for me. My husband and I agreed I was going to be a stay-at-home mom which is something I wanted as well. I don't have any interest in college and have never considered what kind of profession would interest me. I've always just wanted to be a mom and a loving wife,

and expected that to become my reality. I'm also not smart at all and have no idea what to do legally from here, so any advice on that would be great. I'm sorry this is so long as a lot happened and I wanted to provide as much details to my situation as possible. I would never turn to social media in the past I'd go to husband, but that's now changed and I didn't have anyone else. Any advice or just thoughts would be appreciated. Update 1. I just wanted to say thank you everyone that provided helpful feedback and while I didn't get to everyone, I did read every comment.

Now I feel as though I have to clarify some things. 1. The post is not fake or I, I think I would be able to write better than what I wrote. The story also isn't fake. I really, really wish it was. This stuff does happen and yes, I've gone to Reddit about it as I don't have any friends or anyone I can trust which leads me to my next point. Two. The reason I don't have friends is that when I was in sixth grade my friends all dropped me when my dad killed himself. They all considered me weird for having a dad that died in that sort of way and gossiped about me and it was considered social suicide to be friends with me. I also developed an ed through body issues that were installed

in me by my mom's boyfriends at the time and this lasted from late middle school all the way up to early senior year. This lead to me being in hospital a lot and missing out on a lot of school which made it hard for me to make friends. When I was at school everyone had their groups and so I would just eat alone. Three, I do not trust my auntie. My mom and her are very close. They both ran away from home when my mom was 17 and she was 18. They were raised by strict Pakistani immigrants who were very abusive and cut my mother off when they learned she was with my father who was white.

Since, they have only had each other they will always put each other's best interest first. She also has a special need son and a small place so living there would be a huge burden for her. 4. I'm sorry I called myself mature for my age. I've just been told that by teachers and pretty much all adults throughout my life since I was five years old. There was a point I was two grades ahead, however, my mom decided to put me

back in the grade people my age were in for a reason she still struggles to explain to me. Five. My relationship I get was not normal. He approached me at a mall while I was out and asked for my number and he thought I was a lot older than what I was. He found out halfway through our first date I was 18 and still in school and he wanted to end it there. However, I really liked him and said we could go for a second date and we can decide together if we want to keep doing this. We both connected really well and opened up to each other like we'd never done to anyone else. We decided we'd start off as friends and if we end up being comfortable we can pursue a relationship. I was the one who first told him I wanted a relationship. He was very hesitant and didn't want to because he was

worried what people would think. He even told me no at one point and a week later we reconciled and he told me that he loved me and he couldn't stand the idea of not being with me. The only red flag I could see was that he was divorced and that he had a son he barely saw, however, that's due to his ex and son now living in a different state. My husband is a child of Albanian immigrants and he claimed that him and his ex-wife only really shared that in common, otherwise, there was no real love between them. Six, I'm not going to college for the sake of going to college. I want to be a mom and that's all.

However, I will look for a job to support myself in the meantime as the flower shop will not be sustainable. Besides, I think I've lost that job as I haven't gone to three of my shifts and have been dodging their calls as to why I haven't been in. Now finally the update. Basically a night after I posted to hear, my husband came banging on our door that he made a mistake and he was crying. He insisted that my mother was blackmailing him into being with her, and that it was only supposed to be a hookup and he instantly regret. When I found out he panicked and didn't want to have no one so agreed to be with my mom. I let him inside and he showed me all of the texts between him and my mom, and a lot of it was my mom telling him to come over and if he refused she would threaten that she would spill it to me

that they were having an affair. He told me he wants us to be together again and he'll do anything for us to be together. I told him I needed space for now and that he needs to leave. He started to get very reluctant and even started getting scary where he picked up a TV and and broke it and started punching himself when I said that. I genuinely started to get scared and told him that I didn't want him doing something stupid, so I called his friend over and he took him to his place to calm him down. The next morning I woke up to him cooking in our kitchen and he made me my favorite breakfast.

He told me that he wanted to surprise me with something he knew I loved. I told him I appreciated it, but he needs to leave and that if I were to forgive him it was going to take a long time and that this wasn't going to be fixed overnight. He started crying again and he told me that he can't stay on this earth if he knows that it's not with me. I'm not that dumb and know when I'm being manipulated with, so I told him to get out and that this will take time. That's when he got a frying pan and threw it at the wall. I pushed him out and locked the door. I told him to not come back and I'll see him when I'm ready.

Later that day my mother comes and screams outside my door that she knows my husband is here and that I'm stopping them from being together. I told her to leave otherwise I'm calling the cops and she did. However, when I walked outside later that day it's clear she keyed my car and tried to spell out a derogatory word against woman. I called the cops and they told me without footage they can't do anything about it. Two hours after I called the cops she came back and again demanded that I let her in. I told her to go again and that's when she tried to pick the lock to my front door so I called the cops and the moment she heard I was speaking to them she drove off.

I started to feel unsafe where I was and didn't have anywhere to go, so basically I grabbed a bunch of clothes and necessities and took them to my car and well have been living in their since. I don't know what I'm going to do as of now and just hope that I find something. It hasn't been too bad and it's been sustainable for the past day and a bit, but obviously I can't do this forever. My husband did message me saying he came over and has been waiting at our house and is worried that I haven't returned. I told him that he shouldn't be there anyways because I told him I needed space, but I told him that I'm staying in my car till I decided what I want to do. He sent me a bunch of voice messages crying saying I'm torturing myself and that if we're together he'll make sure to take care of me this time. I haven't responded to any of the voice messages directly, however, I am sending him just an update every four to five hours saying I'm okay. Just so he doesn't panic completely. My auntie hasn't contacted me really since I cried in her.

her car, but as mentioned she has a lot on her plate so I don't particularly blame her or anything. But that's the update I'm homeless in a car and have no real direction, L.O.L. I did want to thank you all for the legal advice and will hopefully find a time to get sorted on that. I also have a GP appointment tomorrow with a doctor about STDs so fingers crossed that all goes well. I'm sure I'll find something, however, for now it's a bit shit for me. Update two, I don't know if you guys want another update after this one because I'm sure there'll be more that'll happen later on. However, I feel like this would practically become a diary, LOL. I'm glad to announce I'm not in a car anymore and am living in a woman's shelter. An hour after I posted my last update, a man was

following my car and he looked really nervous like he was contemplating something. He was doing this for about 35 to 40 minutes. I even tested by going down no-through roads and stuff and he would follow me in and out of them. So I followed the advice you guys gave and went to a woman's shelter. I had to get questioned by someone, and I essentially just explained that I didn't feel safe going home as my husband did smack my head while I was kicking him out and he and my mother have been harassing me. They didn't really do much follow-up after that and they were really nurturing with settling me in and a lot of the woman introduced themselves to me. I haven't been in such a supportive environment before. In fact, this may sound dumb as it's a literal shelter, but I don't

to leave. I've made a lot of friends in the least four or so days and I feel genuinely happy. I've made this one really good friend who is the exact same age as me. She told me she's staying here as her stepdad is really violent and the amount of bruises she has is really saddening. It made me cry when started to explain to me how she received every bruise she got. We even got to talking about finding somewhere to live together, which has made me really excited. I've also made a lot of other friends, from a lot of diverse backgrounds and situations that have really opened my world. As to my husband, he recently sent me a text that has made me assured that I don't want to ever see him again. He told me that if I didn't get back together with him, I'd have another suicide on my hands.

He knows how my mother faked the situation and everything, and how much pain that put me through at a young age. I told him this was it and that I'm done with him completely. He proceeded to call me A.W. like my mom and that my dad would be rolling in his grave seeing how I turned out. He also confessed about 30 minutes after sending that text he'd be sleeping with other woman as well as my mom and said that they provided more for him than what I ever could. I simply told him to go ruin one of their lives instead. I won't lie and act tough. I feel completely hurt and manipulated that this man did this to me. Ick everyone will say I should have seen it coming but I really thought we had something special. I was crying throughout all of this and luckily the friends I've made at the shelter were there for me and took care of me. I believe if they weren't there with me throughout all of this I would have done something stupid. So thank you guys as well for encouraging the shelter that really means a lot to me.

My mom recently posted a story of her in a bikini and she wrote Love Hurts. I simply wrote back the laughing emojis as it's clear she's looking at. for not only male attention but sympathy. Knowing her she will twist the situation to make herself the victim and me as the bad guy, such as my father ending his life. I really think I'm done with this woman as it's exhausting even trying with her anymore. My whole life she's been a victim, and the problem is everyone around her treats her like one. My auntie always says to me I shouldn't be too hard on her as she's been through so much. What about me? What about all the stuff she's put me through. Sure she's had it hard, but why does it make it okay for her to make

my life a living hell? Well, to make it even more perfect, she messaged me back after I sent the laughing emojis. She told me that she was allowed to mourn her relationship with my husband and I couldn't make a sacrifice even if it meant her being happy and how this is her first real connection since my dad. I sent back the laughing emoji again. She proceeded to post the interaction on her story and proceeded to post a quote or something saying if only our kids understood that they can hurt us. I simply blocked her after that. Speaking of my auntie also radio silence from her, I tried messaging her to tell her I was in a shelter just in case she was worried. However, before I even told her she said she couldn't talk she was at brunch. Considering she knows my situation you would expect

she would drop brunch to find out if I'm okay. She also didn't message me back after. I am tempted to go to my cousin's wedding, though, which both my mother and auntie are attending and exposing them to my conservative family. However, I am not that selfish to ruin someone's wedding just to get back at someone. I realized I would just be my mom doing that. I also reached out to my grandma in Tennessee, dad sighed. I was hesitant in messaging her as I haven't seen her since I was 15 and we only message happy birthday to each other and that's it.

I asked if I could stay with her and told her my situation. However, she said I could stay for a week after that I'm on my own. She does have three of her sons still living at home and they all are big man-childs, so she said things are already tied around here so me coming wouldn't help. Anyways, that's the update I'm in the shelter and I'm planning to find a place with this girl. I'm also going to figure out legality sometime I've just been really busy. I also had to reschedule my GP appointment to next week as just a lot has been happening. Thank you guys so much for reading this,

and if anything really significant happens, I'll let you guys know. I hope you enjoy this story. I, a 29-year-old man, believe that my partner, a 26-year-old woman, might have chosen me out of convenience. It seems that her closest companion, a 26-year-old guy, is the one she truly desires. Do you think it's best to terminate this relationship? Apologies for the extended message. I didn't realize how much I had to say until I got it all typed out. Thanks in advance to anyone who reads all this.

I've been with my girlfriend Jordan for a little over two years. We live together and we have two cats. Up until this weekend I genuinely thought everything was perfect in our relationship, which I know is what everyone says in these posts, but I really was thinking that I was going to ask her to marry me sometime in the next year. We don't ever get into arguments. Jordan is very sweet and easygoing and normally we just mesh well on everything. Honestly, if everything in our relationship hadn't been so good up until now I probably would have

just broken up with her this weekend. But because things have truly been so perfect I'm not sure if maybe I'm jumping to the wrong conclusion about what to do because my feelings got hurt. The other person who's important in this story is Jordan's friend Mark. She's known Mark for their whole lives because they both grew up in the same small religious community. Jordan isn't part of that religion anymore. She decided to leave the church when she was.

was, I think, 19 and moved to the state that we live in now. Mark still is in the religion and apparently takes it really seriously, I'm told he now works for the church back in Jordan's hometown. Also, as far as I know Mark is the only person from the religious community that Jordan still talks to besides her parents, which I'm mentioning because I now think it could be a red flag. So on Saturday I met Mark for the first time because he was in our city and Jordan wanted us all to have dinner together. At this point I want to say, I will admit that. that when we were first dating and I found out that Jordan had a best friend who was a guy I didn't really like it, especially because it seemed like they were on FaceTime with each other a lot.

But since it was a childhood friend and they mostly didn't see each other in person, I just trusted Jordan that Mark was only a friend and didn't let it bother me and eventually I got over it. So when we were going to dinner, I wasn't jealous or suspicious of Mark at all. If anything, I was somewhat excited to finally be meeting him since I'd been hearing about him for two years. But then the way Jordan and Mark acted at dinner is what convinced me that there's something going on there other than just being best friends. I honestly don't even know how to describe it except to say that I've never seen two people act more obviously like they were in love with each other. They literally would not stop touching each other. They were constantly touching each other's arms and shoulders and at some points they were actually even holding hands.

They completely left me out of the conversation and were laughing about inside jokes, and every time they were. they'd laugh they'd do this thing where they put their foreheads together or that was when they'd be holding hands. And then also they were just looking at each other in a way that I didn't feel comfortable with at all. It was honestly even worse than the touching. It just wasn't how anyone would look at somebody they're supposedly just friends with. I'm 100% sure that every stranger looking at our table thought that Jordan and Mark were the couple and that I was her brother or something. I felt like a third will the whole time and Jordan didn't even notice how awkward she was making it for me because she was way too focused on Mark and all the attention she was getting from

him. And that's really not like Jordan at all. Usually she's a lot more considerate and would notice immediately if I wasn't having a good time or if she was accidentally being rude and excluding someone at the table. So it was genuinely really jarring to be sitting there with her and Mark and basically feeling like I didn't know my girlfriend at all. It was like he turned her into a completely different person who didn't even care that I was alive. So finally at one point, when Jordan got up to go to the bathroom I just said to Mark, so are you into my girl or what's going on here? Mark, nothing's going on at all.

That ship sailed a long time ago. Me, what does that mean? Did you guys date at some point? Mark, no, we never did. And then when she left the church, we both knew it meant that we were never going to. And we've accepted being in each other's lives as friends. There's nothing else going on at all. at all. Me, that makes it sound like the only reason you're not together is because she left the church.

And all Mark did was shrug. Me, well, what if she came back to the church? Would you marry her? Mark, oh, she's not going to do that. You might as well ask what would happen if a bicycle had six tires. And so then when Jordan came back to the table, Mark said to her, op wants to know if we'd be married if you weren't a godless heathen. Jordan, why, did you two call your mom while I was gone? And then she and Mark both just laughed about it and changed the subject. So because of dinner and the conversation and everything else that I've written about in this post, I really feel like Jordan and Mark are in love with each other and not just best friends like they say.

And the only reason they aren't together is because they can't compromise about their religion. I think Jordan thinks that because she's okay with that decision, she expects me to be okay with being her second choice. And in the meantime, she's actually secretly wanting to be with Mark. So that makes me think that I should probably obviously just have self-respect and break up with her because I shouldn't be in a relationship with someone who would rather be with somebody else. But then the problem for me is that our relationship has been so perfect. And Jordan has always treated me so well, except for this one night. The only time she's ever acted like this was on the one occasion that Mark was around in person.

Normally, even when she's talking to him all the time, she's never made me feel this way. So on the one hand, I'm wondering if maybe it doesn't matter what Jordan's feelings are for Mark, as long as he isn't going to be around, it doesn't actually seem to affect our relationship. So maybe I just need to cool off and go back to trusting her that they are indeed only friends, even if it seems to be true that they have complicated feelings for each other. Or should I just end things? Update November 10, 2023. I talked to Jordan on Wednesday night.

The TLDR update to the situation is that I didn't break up with her after we talked about everything I feel like that would be too much of an overreaction for what's actually going on. I do still think I was right to be upset about what I saw happening at dinner on Saturday and Jordan didn't disagree with me about that. But I think I did John. to the wrong conclusion that it meant that she secretly actually wanted to be with Mark more than she wants to be with me. Now that we've talked it out, I don't think there's a reason to end what's otherwise the best relationship I've ever had. And I'm glad that I didn't just immediately trust my instincts because there was more going on with the situation

that I didn't really understand that Jordan has since told me. And now I do feel like she can be given some grace in this situation assuming nothing like this ever happens again. So thanks for the advice, especially for everyone who told me to just talk to her before I made a big decision. So when we talked I decided to take the main piece of advice that I got from everyone and start by telling Jordan that my feelings were hurt by the way she treated me at dinner with Mark. And then see how the conversation went from there. It turned into a very long talk so I don't want to try to remember exact quotes and get them wrong but here are the important things. I repeated to Jordan some of what I wrote in the post and said that I felt. excluded by her and Mark, especially because they were being overly touchy-feely with each other

to the point where it made me uncomfortable. Jordan seemed surprised like she didn't even notice that she and Mark were touching each other that much, but then she thought about it and said that I was right and apologized. She said that Mark is always really touchy with everybody and not just her, I asked, and so she didn't even think about it, but that she wished I would have said something at the time because she didn't realize they were being that obnoxious. I said that was part of what bothered me, because I thought that normally she would have noticed something like that. But she was acting so different around Mark and not paying any attention to anything else, including how I was feeling that it was honestly just made me question which one of us she cared

about more or if she cared about him as more than just a friend. Jordan apologized more and said that she could understand why it would look that way to me, but that she loves me and cares more about me than anyone else in the world and that she didn't mean to act like that or make me feel that way. She said that she was trying to not make Mark feel like a third will because of being a single guy out with a couple but obviously it backfired and just made me feel like the third will instead which wasn't what she wanted to do either. After that Jordan explained a lot to me about her history with Mark, and basically as she explained it she said that she fully admits she cares about him as more than just a normal friend, but she says

that it's not in a romantic way. She said that's why she always specifically refers to him as her best friend and not just as her friend, and said that she would use the phrase he's like my brother if it weren't for the fact that she once had an actual brother, R-I-P, so she won't use that phrasing for anyone else. According to Jordan, the main thing that happened to make her and Mark so close was that when she was 17 she tried to kill herself, and that was actually when everyone else in the community stopped talking to her and Mark was the only person who didn't. For the next couple of years until she moved, he was literally her only friend and she said that he checked on her every single day to make sure she stayed alive, which is also when they got into the habit of talking on the phone so much. And also apparently during this time Mark's parents thought they were dating and made a big deal about how they shouldn't be and that's why she made that remark during dinner, apparently calling Jordan a godless heathen is something that Mark's mom said.

I did tell Jordan that Mark basically said to me that he thought the two of them would be married if she had stayed in the church, and I asked her if she thinks that maybe Mark is in love with her even if she doesn't feel the same way. She said definitely not and I don't think she was being dishonest. I really don't agree with her but I think she genuinely believes that Mark isn't into her in any way apart from friendship. Her opinion of the situation is that she also thinks she and Mark would eventually have gotten married if she had never left the church or moved, but from her perspective it would have been more because of peer pressure than anything else and she doesn't think it would necessarily have been a good thing. She thinks Mark was just being honest about that and that possibly from his perspective he thinks he and Jordan would have made a good couple, but he's probably thinking that because he's just assuming that in that scenario she'd be

the perfect church wife so there's no reason why they wouldn't be a good couple. But then the big thing that happened at the end of the conversation is that Jordan told me that Mark is coming back through our city on his way home from this trip, and so she was going to invite him to hang out with the two of us again, but she said that if I'm going to be uncomfortable with him around then she won't ask him. A lot of people were saying that if she didn't offer to cut contact with him or to cut down on contact with him, it meant that she valued him over me, so the fact that she brought up on her own that she wouldn't invite him to dinner with us again because I didn't like it seemed like a really good sign to me. based on everything else that she said, I do understand why she didn't offer to totally stop being friends with him and I wouldn't expect her to after what she told me about what happened when she was a teenager. So now I'm deciding to take Jordan's word for it that although she and Mark are weirdly close, it's for the reasons that she explained to me and not because she's in love with him. I think the fact that she was immediately apologetic instead of defensive was good, and the way she explained everything did make sense to me. I don't necessarily trust Mark, but I do think I can trust Jordan. But I am going to watch and see if it seems like she's still talking to him as much as she used to,

or if anything changes or sounds different. I'm not going to be controlling and tell her that she can't talk to him or that she has to talk to him less, but I want to see if me talking to her about all of this causes her to act any differently at all. I'm kind of thinking she might realize on her own that the way Mark acts towards her actually does seem like he likes her as more than a friend now that I brought it up, but I don't know. It could be that things just go back to exactly the way they were before and I won't know if anything has actually changed until the next time Mark is around in person. But I don't think that's something I should keep worrying about before it happens.

Relevant comments. Pixel underscore Spartan Op, did she acknowledge that the touching by her was inappropriate? I do not see how she could not have recognized how touchy they were in her lack of physical touch with you. Like many others have said, I am not sure Jordan was being completely honest with you. Did you ask here how she would have felt in a reverse situation? If the three of you meet again you might want to think about excusing yourself to go to the bathroom or something during the meal and instead hide and film their interaction while you are gone. See if Jordan changes how she interacts

when you're not there. I say to capture it on your phone because then you have it to show her if you break up. If she interacts appropriately while you are gone then she may have gotten the message. She should also start limiting her interactions with him, phone slash text, because that relationship is not healthy and no so should have to deal with that if you two get married. It needs to be dealt with now. Op replied, she did acknowledge that all the touching was inappropriate, yes. When she actually thought back on how much they were doing it and how over the top it was, she was embarrassed and realized she shouldn't have started acting like that just because Mark makes it seem normal. I didn't ask her how she'd feel in the reverse situation because it seemed like she

got it immediately as soon as I told her how it made me feel. If the three of us are ever together again, I'll definitely be watching everything, but I don't think there's a chance of that happening for a while. Now on to the other story. Story 2. Am I wrong for making my son take a paternity test? All names have been changed. This is a mess, and I would appreciate opinions from unbiased people. It was recommended that I post here in another page. I F-39 have two kids, M-17 and F-10. When I was 21 I had a one-night stand which resulted in my son Austin, the father, wanting nothing to do with my child. When my son was three I met my husband Mark M-38. My son adores my husband and calls him father. Austin met his current girlfriend through Mark's best friend Alan, her father. Macy and Austin have been close

since they were young and we were all thrilled when we found out they were dating. After we found out, Mark and I sat Austin down and explained that we're happy for him but we needed him to know the importance of safe sex whether it was happening or not. He was disgusted but said he understood and we left it at that. For context, my son is what others describe as shy and soft-spoken, he's really sensitive and takes harsh comments slash actions to heart. We thought everything was fine with him until he came home crying. He eventually told us Macy had cheated on him. I was angry and urged my son to leave, but my husband calmed us both and asked to speak with

Austin privately. Essentially he asked Austin what he wanted to do and if he wanted us to stop seeing Macy and her father. Austin said he didn't want that and wanted to work things out with Macy. I was upset but didn't say anything, ever since that happened, I've hated seeing her around. All I think about when I see her is my son distressed in crying his eyes out. I act cordial around her, but I don't like her. Around February, Austin came home looking rather upset again, so I sat down with him and asked

what's going on. I wasn't expecting to hear him say what he said to me Macy's pregnant. I was furious, I told him I expected better from him. I also said that before anything happened, he needed to do a paternity test. He was angry that I suggested she cheated again, but I didn't like how she was suddenly pregnant. When Mark came home from work, I filled him in and he was equally upset. We all sat down and discussed it. Austin explained that I demanded a paternity test was done, and Mark wasn't happy to hear that.

I explained that she's cheated before, she could have cheated again. that led to a huge argument before we all calmed down. I asked if her parents knew. Apparently not, he said she agreed to tell them tonight. And sure enough, about an hour later Mark gets an angry call from Alan demanding that my son marries his daughter, and if Austin refuses he demands that he pay child support and stay out of this kid's life. Of course we were all angry and exhausted, so I said that nothing was happening until a paternity

test was done and I wasn't taking the word of a cheating little girl. He blew up at us and it was radio silence after the call. Macy was told she can no longer see Austin and he took it out on me. A few weeks ago, Alan contacted us and agreed to do a paternity test. I asked why this sudden change but he ignored me, he said he set up the appointment for May 5th. Austin went with Mark, he said he didn't want to be around me. It stung and I won't lie, it made me cry when he said that. Results finally came in a few nights ago and he isn't the father, he was shattered. Instead of apologizing, he screamed that this was my fault and he'd have never known, he hasn't said much to me since. Maybe I was wrong for making him do a paternity test, but I was only looking out for my son.

Was I wrong for making him take a paternity test? Update October 25, 2023. Hello all, I got a few requests for an update, so here it is. First of all, I'd like to thank everyone for their opinions. I was questioning if I did the right thing since finding out he wasn't the father and thought I was too rough with the situation. We've all been in therapy, group and individual. My son has started to come around and apologize for the yelling and shitty choices. He calls it that, not me, he made. His therapist encouraged him to explain his thought process about the entire thing, and essentially, he thought she was the one. She was his second girlfriend and thought that they had a strong bond

until one of his friends showed him a picture of her kissing some other guy, it turned into a big fight and only escalated when he found out they had slept together. I myself have been cheated on and it made me angry to know Austin had to experience it himself. He said he wasn't happy about the entire thing and he's feeling guilty for taking it out on me, we hugged it out and got ice cream afterwards. Our little ritual after we've had an argument, Austin also broke up with Macy after finding out, of course she blames me for the entire thing, but she's old enough to know that her actions have consequences, she hasn't been handling it well.

Apparently she's been lashing out at everyone possible and attempted to egg our house. Austin has been quiet, but I can tell he's starting to accept what's going on and he's been spending more time with friends. I've been giving him his space and I think that's helped in the long run. Now on to Mark, a lot of people had a lot of assumptions about him and some even suggested he is the father, but that is far from the truth. He's known this little girl her entire life and thought she was better than that. He wasn't trying to save his friendship with Alan. He was allowing our nearly adult son to make his own choices and deal with the consequences of said choices. Macy has also given birth recently, and we know who the father is. Unfortunately, the father was Austin's best friend Chris. He decided it was a good idea to tell Austin while they were hanging out here.

I wasn't in the room when he was told, but I was there when he started to beat Chris up. I was outside setting up Halloween decorations in the front yard when I heard a thunk and some screaming, so I ran in through the front door to find Austin punching Chris over and over again. Mark also heard the commotion and came to pull Austin off Chris. Chris apologized and left. It wasn't until he drove away that Austin broke down crying. We all went out for dinner that night, and we've tried to cheer him up, but I'm starting to realize he needs space on this and to let him come to me about it when he's ready. Mark and Austin have been going out the last couple of days. Mark says that he remembers when he was Austin's age and only hopes he's helping him realize that he's got a whole lifetime to find his one.

Therapy has helped us out, but I know he needs his space to process this. Thank you all once more and please take care of yourselves. Relevant comments. Prudence underscore Rigby. Also, what happened with Alan? Oop replied. As far as I know, he's gotten in contact with Chris and his parents and they are working out child support. I haven't personally heard from him, but this is what Mark has told me. Prudence underscore Rigby.

I wonder if he was as hostile with them as he was with y'all. Their friendship survived and scathed or were they distant up until the paternity test? Boop replied. They were distant, and they are still distant. I hope you enjoy this story. Discovered my spouse's hidden panel monitoring the gossip of our neighborhood. Later, she included me in it. Upon questioning her, she fabricated proof to incriminate our neighbor and pretended to be expecting a baby. For context we're both in our later 30 seconds and live in a pretty typical suburban neighborhood where we all know each other. My wife has always loved trashy movies and shows about infidelities, and she eats up true crime about spouses killing their cheating partners too. She just says something about it makes her morbidly fascinated in her

words. Well, a couple months back we had a scandal in our neighborhood where a married couple in the neighborhood divorced because the husband cheated. No, there wasn't a murder or anything like that, but she became obsessed with learning every detail from every neighbor. No matter the occasion, be it a shower or cookout, she would bring it up hoping there would be any new information. A month later is when I stumbled on the board in her home office. I was doing some cleaning and I found a massive bulletin board facing away leaned up against the wall. Curiosity got the better of my and I turned it around to find a literal fucking fucking conspiracy board of all our neighbor's pictures with lines of yarn connecting each other like

the fucking Pepe S. Sylvia meme. I was totally confused and asked where what this was and she told me it was a hobby she had started recently where she would track rumors or likely candidates for cheating on the board. The yarn represented who was possibly cheating with whom. She had clearly gotten all the images on Facebook or some social media and printed them out and even had a few sticky notes with details. I told her this was creepy and insane and she said maybe if I was doing it as a man, but she is just having harmless fun as a hobby and she wouldn't be crazy and try to oust anyone

based on rumors. She just likes feeling like a detective. She told me to view it like a creative art piece. I was still super weirded out but let it go, or tried. I thought about it a lot. While every now and then I admit to checking the board when cleaning, but just a couple days ago I looked to see that now I was on the board with a yarn attached to a neighbor's wife I'm casual friends with.

I asked her why she would add me if she thought I was cheating and she said that was a different yarn color for potential matches for cheating. She said if it makes me feel better she was put. planning on adding herself to the board soon. Well, I got pissed and kind of lost my temper about it. I told her to get rid of the board or our marriage will be in trouble. Things have been super rocky since. Sorry for the long post, I am starting to feel bad and it hit me more than usual this morning. Should I apologize to her? And before you ask, no, I don't suspect her of cheating. Probably I wish she was because it would at least make more sense than this.

Ada. Update 1, September 5th, 2024. Anyway, Jesus Christ. Firstly, appreciate all of the concern and NTAs. It gave me the courage to approach her and tell her that while I may have overreacted by threatening our marriage, I think it is a creepy thing to do. She apologized and said she would get rid of the board. I thought we were good. literally two days later. Two days later.

Shit hits the fan. Our happily married next door neighbor finds a woman's bra under the bed that does not belong to her. It doesn't take long for the whole neighborhood to find out. Well, my wife is giddy, like jumping up and down for joy. She shows me the board, which she still didn't trash like she promised. And of course the husband was marked with yarn, meaning he was likely to cheat. She told me the board was accurate after all and maybe she should keep her hobby around. I was definitely suspicious, so I looked at the board again later. It looked different from the last time I saw it before the latest scandal. Instead of the yarn connecting to another neighbor, the cheating husband's yarn connected to a post-it with a question

mark. Firstly, it was the only question mark there and I swore it wasn't there last time I saw the board. So either she changed it after the cheating to prove a point, or slightly before it happened, which made me even more suspicious either way. Now I felt like I was the detective and I was going crazy. I went over to the cheating husbands to ask a few questions. The wife was staying at her parents so it was just the two of us. I asked him if he actually did it and he said no, he would never. Then I asked if my wife had been over recently. He said one day while you were at work his wife,

asked her to water a plant they had while they were both away and told her where the key was. So yes. I immediately raised an eyebrow. I asked if he still had the bra and he was getting nervous and told me not to get the wrong idea. I said, don't worry. He still had the bra and I looked at it. It was my wife's, but one I knew she almost never wore because it was from a lingerie I bought her one Christmas she said was uncomfortable. I told my neighbor I needed to talk to my wife and out, but I told him not to worry. I approached her with the bra and asked her what was going on. She played stupid, but I told her to cut the BS. I asked if she had either cheated on me with him or planted it there, either way she was in trouble. She confessed to planting the bra and said it was to

make me admit her hobby was valid or something. I flipped on her. I said this was worse than her cheating on me because instead of ruining just our marriage she ruined our neighbors and ours. I demanded she call the wife and admit to everything, even sending pictures of the board. I even showed the Reddit post which actually helped convince her my wife had planted it rather than cheated with her husband. Well they made up but now I have no idea what to do. I am barely speaking to my wife and it is only a matter of time before the entire neighborhood figures this out. I seriously need advice. Update 2, November 12, 2024. It's been months since last update. Sorry, I've been busy.

Long story short, my wife is in a mental health facility. After what had happened previously, I did not speak to my wife for a while. I tried to stay working or out of the house as often as I could. Well, a few weeks passed in time made it seem like less and less of a big deal. Finally my wife offered to take me out to a very nice dinner to make things up to me. She told me everything was behind her and while I was avoiding her she had actually started online therapy to get help and realize now what she did was wrong. I really believed her and we had a great night. One thing led to another that night and Yay, LOL.

It took about two days after that for her to get a pregnancy test and she texted me the positive result. Yeah, I know some of you all right. I already think I'm in fucking moron, but it had been a rough year and this made me really happy. I started getting very excited. We started talking about turning my home office to a baby room, looking up ways to prepare, booking appointments, planning a shower, etc., really fun but whirlwind week. Unfortunately, she told me the first ultrasound was at a time I had to be at work and she would have to go alone. Really bummed me out and I asked her to reschedule, but she said it was the only availability.

Well, that next week she went and I waiting for an update or pictures or anything. Nothing. She came home and was super quiet and I flipped out and got super worried that the worst had happened. I told her I understood she was probably in a lot of pain about something but she had to tell me. She finally admitted no, it wasn't a miscarriage. But she was actually pregnant for longer than she thought, longer than the last time we did it. She actually got pregnant during the time I was avoiding. her. Obviously I was so mad and upset and I couldn't understand why she would do this to me,

but then I realized all the signs were there for so long and all the comments telling me she was probably cheating was right. But I tried to keep a clear head for at least a second because I really love my wife and I couldn't believe it. I asked her who it could have been and she actually said she didn't know. She said she hadn't done it with anyone during the time I was avoiding her. She swore it and also didn't know what this meant. I thought. I thought, thought about it and realized if she was really pregnant for that long, her tummy should be showing and it wasn't. I decided to call the place and ask them to confirm what they said. My wife told me it would be a waste of time and she promised she heard them clearly, so I didn't

do it that night. But I couldn't sleep that night without hearing it from the doctors myself. I called the clinic she told me she went to the day before in the morning and asked them to confirm the results. They told me something worse than I expected. She had a little. She had no visit, she was never there. I didn't understand that at all. Before I talked to my wife again, I did what I should have done in the first place and reverse image searched the pregnancy test image. Yeah, it was on Google from a random years old Facebook post. I was again really mad at my wife and couldn't believe she would put me through all this. I confronted her about the picture and that I called the place and there was no appointment. I told her she had a pattern of lying and this was

probably the end of our relationship. But she responded in a way I didn't expect. She burst into tears and went manic, which I did expect, but then said that she really had cheated on me and really was pregnant and that I had made this up in my head because I couldn't face what she did to me. She said she felt like the devil and Hitler and started sobbing and literally screaming at the top of her lungs. She locked herself in the bathroom and told me she was going to kill herself over what she did to me. I couldn't get the door open and freaked out. I called the cops and they broke the door down. She was not hurt, but she was really out of it.

They took her to get a mental evaluation and she told them everything there. She even started mixing in stuff about the board and how she knew everyone around her was a cheater so she had done the same because she was in an evil place. She promised them she was pregnant but she didn't know who the father was. They tested her while in custody and no pregnancy at all. They told me she was likely suffering from a form of schizophrenia and actually genuinely believe that she was saying, and likely always had to some level, but it seemed to be getting worse. They said she had a symptom called self-accusation and needed help. While I got her in a facility last week and she is safe.

They are making a little progress. I do not think she thinks she is pregnant anymore. I have visited a few times, but she is very withdrawn with me and says she feels too guilty to look me in the eye. I think there was definitely meddling at certain parts like planning evidence, but now I just feel terrible I did not get her the help she needed when all the real signs were there. I hope her medication starts to help and she can be normal again. And yeah, the neighborhood gossip is having a field day with all this. Anyway, thanks for listening. I hope this is my last update.

Thanks for all the help. Next story, I'm a nanny of a kid and he acts like a baby, sleeps with his parents. and spies on me through my window. I thought it was cultural but this behavior creeps me out. So I am from the U.S. and recently moved to Italy to Nanny. I feel this is important because so far I have not been able to tell if I'm struggling with a cultural difference here in Italy or if I actually have reason to be weirded out. It is easy to tell that the son, Dario, is in middle school, as he is already several than me and his mom,

and is maybe 30 pounds on me. When I first got here, some of the stuff that freaked me out a little I could handle and I chalked it up to being an Italy thing. This includes stuff like talking almost exclusively in a baby voice when addressing his parents, calling his parents mommy and daddy, fighting physically with his little sister over who gets to sit on mom and dad's lap multiple times throughout the day, fighting with the sister over who gets to sleep with the parents. Getting extremely upset when mom or dad leaves and whining about not getting enough kisses or time laying in bed kissing with mom and having his parents blow on chewed food in his mouth because it's too hot. Now I really don't want to be critical of this if it's normal here, you know? But in the U.S. I seriously can't imagine a single seventh grade boy engaging in any of these behaviors, so it's really new to me.

And really it hadn't affected me, so I just let it be. The problem is though that now I'm starting to get a lot of it. involved and it's making me really uncomfortable. For example, our rooms have adjacent windows which allows the kids to see into my entire room at all times. To me, this is pretty inappropriate. What am I supposed to do when I need to change clothes? But I also don't want to seem like I am sexualizing children or accusing them of anything, so I just politely asked for curtains and took to changing in the bathroom. After weeks without curtains, the family finally promised me that someone was coming to put them up. Well, he only put them in the kids' room. Ever since then I find

Dario peeping through the curtains at me multiple times a day. Now I'm sure he is just checking on me or curious about what I'm up to, but it makes me so uncomfortable. I didn't want to tell the family though because I'm afraid they would think I was accusing their baby of like, trying to spy on me changing so I just took matters into my own hands and hung a blanket up over my window. Another issue has been when we stay at the kids' grandparents' house. There is a room for the parents with a bed for one child, and a room for me with a bed for one child. I figured we would split up boys and girls and I would stay with the daughter, but nighttime rolls around and Dario is crawling into the bed next to mine.

I was so uncomfortable I could hardly sleep. I have talked to my friends at home about this and they all think it's really weird, because we aren't related and he's a teenager now. But this is of course an American opinion so I can't tell for sure if we're imposing our ideas on this family. Again if this is really a cultural thing though, I don't know how to tell the family that where I am from. It's kind of inappropriate for a boy so old to be sleeping next to me, especially when he's been spying on me lately, without causing issues. Of course these behaviors affect other aspects of our life as well as it is hard to get Dario to do anything because he usually claims it's too hard to do, making a bed at 13. Too hard? Are you kidding? And I often find myself wanting to tell him to grow up.

What I need help with is knowing whether he does need to grow up or if all this behavior is normal here and I am the crazy American that needs to adjust. Is this behavior normal for a 12-year-old or is it immature? I feel like the parents still really see him as a young child, and usually he acts like, but for the most part it seems like he plays up the baby act because he knows it makes his parents cater to him more. If this all is abnormal, does anyone have any suggestions about how to bring this up to the family? Edit, just want to clarify that at the grandparents' house there are two beds, and they are next to each other. Dario was not in my bed but in the bed next to mine. Comments where Op has replied, The Freaky, It's normal behavior for a spoiled 13-year-old. Of course most adolescents would want to peek at you through the curtains. The problem is the parents, they have to stop that shit right now.

Don't you have authority as a nanny to scold him? I'm Spanish, we have a very similar culture to Italy, and that shit is inappropriate. The parents are educating a horrible child that will grow up to be an asshole that thinks the world should cater to him. Oop! Oh my goodness the relief I am feeling right now to know that this isn't normal. So far I have not particularly felt like I have much authority because the times I would scold him. The parents are sitting right there, and how can I reprimand him in front of his own parents? I didn't include this in the post, but he is already showing major signs of being an asshole. He is always so rude, critical, and ungrateful.

Every meal I make he has something to insult about it. He treats his little sister like shit even though she is a doll and often acts more mature than him. And he loves ordering me around and telling me what I'm doing wrong. It drives me up the wall. B-186, we've established this kid's behavior is weird. But WTF at the parents responding to your request for privacy slash curtains by giving them to the child? Oop, I have no clue. They've been really weird about some stuff.

Like, this is TMI, but the mom knew I was on my period because I had to ask her where to buy tampons here and we get to the house and there's no trash can in the bathroom or in my room. I asked for one multiple times and she said she would get one and never did. And when I asked last she said, well, the kids have a trash can in their room if you need it like that. WTF are you not an adult woman? Do you not understand how this works? Update, hi all. I'm back, yish how long has it been, three to four months later with an update. Long story short, I quit. Here's the long version for those interested. The curtain issue, like I said in my last post I had just hung a blanket for privacy and since then there have been no peeping issues. I asked two more times for curtains and was reassured both times that the curtain

would come to hang them in my room. He did come back once and hung more curtains in the kids' room, but again not in mine. Then I was told that they didn't like him and would be finding another curtain guy to hang my curtains. It's been four months, no more mention of it, I still used the blanket. The vacation issue, I have simply refused to go on vacation with them. I'm off on weekends and I've reached a point where I just refused to be home for the entire weekend and manage not to see them from Friday night until Monday morning if I can help it. I go on weekend trips, crash on couches, sneak into my room when they're eating. Things like that just to avoid seeing anyone on my days off.

The Dario issue, Dario still acts extremely immaturely. I've warmed up to him a lot and I've figured out how to cut his rudeness and such. He's become a lot more positive and kind, especially because his mom has been gone a lot and he's with me every day. I'm very upbeat and have worked really hard to get him to socialize and speak kindly. Unfortunately, he seems to have almost regressed in terms of the childish behavior. He still sits on laps, kisses a lot, and sleeps with a parent when the other is gone. The baby talk is constant. Constant. For example, he loves to repeat back butchered syllables of words if that make sense. Like his dad will say pa-a-me-un-cuk a-o, pass me a spoon, and he will clap and exclaim

a-o. Or void de al-Aqua. Do you want water? And he'll go Q-Q-Q. He also has started eating kind of like a baby too. Like he'll take the remaining tomato sauce that we used on pasta and use the giant spoon to drink it out of the pot and get it all over his face. And then suck on each of his fingers. But when I look at his parents, they're looking at him like when you see a cute baby trying to use a fork and getting food on his face. But he's 13, so it's honestly sickening to watch and listen to. He won't lock the door when he goes to the bathroom or showers. Why, I started locking the door when I was like seven. And he even cried the other day when his sister sat on the foot of his bed, he doesn't like things touching his bed. And guess what? The parents got

mad at the daughter, said it was her fault for baiting him, she just had to tie her shoe for a second, and declared that it's her fault Dario will be upset all night. He also hasn't made any progress with friends, and has taken to playing League of Legends so he won't leave his room or do any activities or lessons with me or the sister. It's pretty sad, honestly. Basically, the hardest part of this whole thing has been the mother. I won't even go into it here, but she's honestly clinically insane and I feel so bad for all the people in this house that that have to put up with her. She's just a power-hungry, jealous, bitter woman who needs to see a professional.

Basically, I went home for Christmas to be with my friends and family and realized how bad this experience was for my health. I was going out drinking almost every night to escape the house. I was sleeping horribly because I knew she was here and her presence gave me awful anxiety. I was getting yelled at every day even when I did nothing wrong. I was at home in estates and the thought of going back made me absolutely miserable. So when I came back I told them I needed to go back early for medical reasons, not totally untrue, and now I'm set to leave the last week of March.

They've found a new girl. Look out for her post here sometime in the future. I hope you enjoy this story. Partners' previous romantic interest reached out to him, prompting me to address the situation. It was then revealed that he had been underwent. faithful throughout our time together. Let's refer to my partner as Adam. His own podcast. It's finally starting to blow up a little. Due to privacy and me quite literally being on a few of the episodes, I'm not naming the talk show slash podcast. He's nowhere near famous, but he's finally starting to be

recognized. I used to be the main co-host, but I've been too busy with work lately to be overly active on the show. Obviously, you can't have a podcast with one person. That's kind of boring. So Isaac told me he found someone to have as a more constant co-host when I'm not available. I told him that was great and asked him who it was. He told me her name was Abigail and sent me her Instagram. It didn't seem like he was hiding anything, so everything felt fine. But about a week later, we were having dinner with our friend group when Isaac's best friend, Josh, told me in front of everyone that he was surprised about how cool I was with Isaac working with his ex-fling. Let's say my reaction was the complete opposite of cool. I was more upset that Isaac lied to me than anything.

Why would he feel the need to lie about something like that? I like to consider myself pretty laid back about these kinds of things. Would I have felt awkward? Yes. But the show is recorded in apartment that me and Isaac share and I seriously don't see him cheating on me. We're really serious and have been talking about marriage lately. But the fact that he lied? It's the only red flag he's really shown me, but I just feel really weird about it. When we got home, I made him talk to me about it. About a year before he met me, he met Abigail and had a friends with Benefits relationship with her. Apparently he ended things with her because he wanted something more serious, something with labels and she didn't. Once again, not that disturbing or weird, but he still lied to me.

And the way that his best friend said it was almost in awe, like the idea was unbelievable, making me think there's more to the story. I told Isaac I don't feel comfortable with him and Abigail because if he felt the need to lie to me about working with an ex-fling, it's probably not the best idea. He said he really needed someone who could be a constant co-host on the show if I couldn't. And I said he would just have to find someone else because I was not comfortable with this. I told him maybe I would have been if he didn't lie, but he lost that chance. I kept going far enough to say if he kept talking to her, I might have to reconsider our relationship. He eventually agreed, but he's been giving me the silent treatment for the last couple days. Our friend group knows what

happened due to the mid-dinner announcement. It's split 50-50. Some of my friends think I should cut him some slack and he didn't mean to lie. They're saying Isaac is a good guy who just didn't want to hurt my feelings, but I have a really bad feeling about this. Now I'm worried I really did overreact. Other things like this have happened before. Now that I really think about it, but so many of our friends are saying I'm overreacting over a small mistake and I think they might be right.

Now that I think about it, small things like this have happened in the past, but the thing is I love Isaac. I'm willing to keep trying for him. I just can't get the sick feeling out of my stomach. The friends on my side think I should continue to talk to him about this, but I don't even know what to say at this point. I really need some advice. Edit for all of the people going straight to break up.

I do want to make it known that I really love this man. We've been dating for four years. We have a child, I'm kidding, she's a cat. I understand that ending things. might be the only option, but right now I want to focus more on advice than hearing how I should end things. Isaac has been with me during one of the hardest periods of my life, losing my sister. He is strong and kind and in the nicest possible way, an airhead. If breaking up becomes necessary, we'll switch gears. But all I need right now is some brutal honesty and advice on what I should say to him.

Edit 2, he does have another job due to the fact that we can't survive off my money and the podcast alone. He works today, and I work tonight. I'll only have an hour to talk to him and I want things to be a lengthy conversation, so I'm going to wait until I'm off on Friday. I don't know what exactly I'll say yet, but I'll figure it out. Thank you for all the responses and I'll make sure to update. Update 1, August 3, 2024. I'm hoping this will reach all of the people that saw and commented on my post. First off, I want to thank you so much. much. To the ones of you who helped me think of questions to ask him, I cannot thank you enough. I was diagnosed with severe anxiety when I was 10 years old. I spent all morning pacing and had a

minor anxiety attack before talking to him. Normally things like this make me burst into tears, no matter how major or minor. But I'm proud to say I held my ground. He brought me coffee this morning, something he almost always does. He's been talking to me more now. He's been talking to me more but there's still this weird distance between us. He brought me coffee, kissed my forehead, and we ate breakfast together. He told me about work and everything felt so perfect, but I knew deep down it wasn't. That this nagging feeling would never go away if I didn't talk about Abigail. So in the most uncouth way possible, I blurted out, we need to talk.

Isaac tensed and finally nodded, surprising me by saying, we do. One point to anxiety. We talked for around two hours. I'm going to summarize our conversation. The first thing I asked was how long they've been in contact. He told me that the way they met was from being in the same psychology class in college and being in a study group. This added up. I know that he's still close with that old study group.

Some of the guys in that group are his best friends, Josh being one of them. He told me they've stayed in contact through that group chat, but haven't talked to. one-on-one until recently. The second thing I asked was why the hell didn't he tell me? I teared up a little asking him and he immediately started profusely apologizing. I told him that it hurt to hear it from Josh and not him. He said, and I quote, I didn't think it was a big deal. I know it's stupid, but I just didn't think about it. He told me that they aren't the best of friends and she just seemed like a good replacement for me until I could be more active again. I asked why he wanted her, and why she was the first thought and he explained how he wanted to do more topics revolving around

college life slash classes and study tactics, and she would be a good person to do that with since she was a part of his life during that stage. He told me that he loves me and he never meant to hurt me. He admitted that he knew it might make me uncomfortable, so he chose not to tell me because he knows how much I tend to spiral due to my anxiety. I got frustrated and told him that wasn't his choice to make. He agreed with me and told me he was sorry and he won't do it again. He added that Abigail will never have to come on the podcast, and he never wants to purposefully make me uncomfortable. I agreed, saying I didn't want her on the podcast. Then the tables turned a little. I thought this was going so great, we were in agreement and everything seemed fine. I had a little

bit of closure and he seemed content. But then he asked me something I couldn't have guessed. There's something else. She sent me nudes. What the fuck? I felt my heartbreak a little and asked how he responded. He showed me the messages. They were two fucking days old. He responded with a single message, I'm flattered, but I have a girlfriend. Yet he didn't block her. I demanded he cut contact with her and he argued saying it would make it awkward for his friend group. I argued that I was his fucking girlfriend and yeah, the situation was awkward. I asked him how he would react if Josh sent me nudes, and they got to him. He admitted that he'd cut him off and expect me to do the same.

He nodded and agreed to block her. I watched him block and delete her contact. I still didn't feel content. He saw those messages two days ago and didn't tell me. That was my breaking point. I basically said, maybe honesty isn't as important to you as it is to me, but if one of your friends sent me nudes I would tell you within minutes. I kept going and started crying, and he did too.

He kept apologizing and saying that he hadn't brought it up to me because he felt like I was avoiding him and he wanted to wait until he knew I was ready to talk. Which felt like bullshit because he was giving me the silent treatment. I wasn't considering breaking up in my last post, but now? I don't know. I know this wasn't the update you guys wanted, and I promised there will be another one. I told him that I needed space, and I'm someone who's rare to set my boundaries until I'm really upset. He apologized and tried to hold me, but I stepped back. I'm writing this from my best friend's place. I'm over at her house right now staying the night. I told Isaac we can talk again in a couple days,

but right now I need to think things through. The thing is, he cried. when I started talking about ending things. Isaac doesn't cry. The only time I've ever seen him cry in our entire four-year-long relationship was when his mom died. He loves me, I know he does. But I feel so lied too. Maybe I'm overreacting but right now I just feel betrayed. I'm sorry and I know this wasn't the update you all wanted.

But thank you to all of you. If you want to give me advice, please do. I don't know where to go next and I still have questions I want to ask him. I'm okay with answering questions too. I'll try to update if something else happens, good or bad. And if anyone's curious, yes, I brought our cat with me. Update 2, August 27, 2024. Sorry it's been so long since I've posted.

A lot has happened, and I'm honestly not sure where to start, but I'll start with this. We broke up. I ended up contacting Abigail. Some comments thought it might be smart, so I reached out to her over Instagram and asked for her side of the story. She had no idea who I was at first. She then seemed very surprised I was contacting her. She realized who I was from the little Isaac told her, but she, according to her, he said we started dating last month, not four years ago. This information really confused me, and I needed to know more.

We met up for coffee and she filled me in that they'd been hooking up every once in a while and her words maybe once or twice every six months for years. She started crying and hugged me while she apologized, saying she had no idea I'd been his girlfriend for so long. So apparently, their FWB relationship never ended and he had been cheating on me the entire time we had been together. She assured me they had been safe and I shouldn't have anything, but in all honesty, I kind of blanked out. I was with this man for four years. I don't blame her in the slightest. I think she wants to keep in contact, but right now it's too painful to talk to her. It's not her fault.

It's purely Isaac's, but I just can't deal with anything that is remotely connected to him right now. I'm so confused on whether Josh knew this or not, but I feel like he wouldn't have said anything that night at dinner if he did. I'm so sorry this update took so long. I broke up with Isaac over text classy, I know and told him my best friend would stop by to collect his things. I also bought our cat and said that I'd like to keep her. He protested on the breakup, saying we could get couples therapy, but I said there was nothing that could fix four years of lying. Right now I'm living with my best friend and we're having some serious girl time. I'm in shreds, but I know that this was for the best and it would have hurt more to stay. Sorry again for the late

update and thank you all for your advice. Sorry for the repost. It got taken down and I still want advice and thoughts. Update 3, August 28, 24. This is the final update. I wasn't even going to write this, but I thought it would be a slightly happier ending for some of you guys in an all honesty for me. Josh ended up calling me last night. At first, I didn't answer in fear it was really Isaac trying to contact me through him. But after the third call I did. This guy sounded pissed. The first thing he said was, name, I am so fucking sorry. He didn't give me any room to speak before going on this tangent on what a shitty guy

Isaac is and how he can't believe he was best friends with a guy like that for so long. He told me that he made a spontaneous stop by at my old apartment, something that wasn't unusual for him, and was confused when he realized I wasn't living there anymore. Isaac admitted to cheating on me, something Josh didn't know, but had suspected. You guys were right. He said that comment to warn me. Some things I've come to realize is Isaac was possessive. He wouldn't let me hang out with our male friends one-on-one. He was always lurking next to me. Josh told me he alerted our entire friend group of what Isaac did, and while two or three of the guys took Isaac's side, what the fuck, the rest felt terrible for me.

They cut contact with Isaac and those couple guys. Josh told me that if I need anything, he would love for me to ask him and he apologized again, saying he should have told me earlier when he thought he'd seen the signs, but he never would have assumed Isaac had been carrying this infidelity for so long. So yeah. I guess I could do another update if anything big happens, but this is where I stand.

Relevant comments where OP has replied. What made Josh suspect the cheating? OOP last year I was away for a week because me and some friends went to the camping. Apparently he did one of his stop beasts to see if Isaac wanted to hang out and Isaac wouldn't come to the door. Josh thought he heard a female's voice and some noises. Isaac ended up telling him I had been on the phone with him, which is BS because I had no service for that entire camping trip. OOP when told to hook up with Josh, I already said this to a reply up there, but Josh is the last person I want to see right now. And frankly, I don't want to date anyone.

I just found out the man that I wanted to marry has been cheating on me for our entire relationship. I'm probably not going to go back into the dating pool for at least a year, and I'm someone who likes some heavy emotional connection before sleeping with someone. Josh is a great friend, but in all honesty, it was hard to just hear his voice over the phone knowing that he was so heavily tied to Isaac. Next story. Dead BFF's mom showed up claiming my husband was the father. The truth was far worse than I could have imagined. I don't even know where to start. The past six months have been an absolute cluster fuck,

and it only seems to be getting worse. My best friend since elementary school, who I'll call Alice, passed away in February from cancer. She had a two-year-old daughter who went into the custody of her mom after she passed away, who I'll call Alexis. Last month Alexis showed up on our doorstep unannounced, telling my husband he needs to take responsibility for his child and either take custody or start finally paying child support. She says that Alice had told her when her daughter was born who the father was, but didn't want

anything to do with him. To answer the inevitable, Alice was a traveling nurse and made a lot of money, which is the only reason I can think of for why she didn't go for child support. During this conversation, my husband had the worst panic attack he's ever had. so we had to end the conversation before I could get more details. My husband's story is, I don't even know he said that Alice's daughter is probably his, but that it isn't what I think. Almost three years ago we threw a large housewarming party as we just moved into our dream home, after I finally finished residency and was set to make real money for once.

Alice was in town and set to be at the party, but I was called into work before she got there. I didn't get back till after 3 a.m., party was whining. down, my husband was passed out upstairs, and Alice had already left the party, which at the time I did find strange as we hadn't seen each other in months. My husband claims he woke up in the middle of the night to Alice on top of him, but he passed out again before he could say anything. He claims he never told me because he was worried I wouldn't believe him which I don't know if I do. He showed me some texts he sent his best friend the next day asking for his advice about him thinking someone raped him, but if he cheated he could have had that conversation as evidence,

especially since he never said Alice specifically. Ever since the party he has been very distant with Alice, and after she had her daughter he would even find excuses not to be around the house when she would visit at all. I don't know if that's because he cheated, or if Alice did actually rape him and this was his trauma response. Honestly, I don't know what to do. I've known Alice since we were children and she had never come across as that kind of person. But I've also known my husband for over a decade and he's not once ever given the inclination of a cheater. He's an attractive guy and I've seen the looks he gets at the gym and he's never even given more than a glance. What the hell should I do? How do I figure out what the truth is here when Alice isn't even around to defend herself?

She never even implied she liked my husband, let alone want to sleep with him. I told my husband he needs to get a DNA test before anything is decided on the child's part, but in the meantime he needs to move out while I think about what I'm going to do here. Additional info, Boop responds to Alice's behaviors when visiting her at home and if Alice would tell her about the affair. Boop, not that I noticed. She'd always been at least a little standoffish towards him as she thought I could do better. The first time she visited after she gave birth, she asked where he was since he wasn't home, for the first time, but she never asked again after that. I hadn't thought about that actually, thank you.

That's a good point. She always thought I could do better than him. So if it was an affair you'd think she would have told me on her deathbed at least. Boop on if her husband drinks or not. Oop, not at all. He rarely drinks, and generally only at parties which at our ages are few and far between. He works a tough and stressful job, so I figured once he was buzzed he laid down and fell asleep, Not that he had drank more than normal or anything like that.

Did Alice ever named the father of her baby? Oop, she told me it was a man she met while in another state for work. Short-term fling. Willicious, wait, I get that you need to process all this, but you've told the potential victim of sexual assault that he needs to leave his home, his safe place, and you, his safe person. I think you've jumped the gun a bit here and shunned your life mate who may have been raped. Oop, yes, I'm starting to realize I've made a terrible mistake.

Update, August 12, 2024. After talking with you, I've come to the realization that my husband is being truthful. My best friend raped him. Several people pointed out that with Alice not liking my husband, if it was an affair, she would have told me when she was dying, if only to separate us. You're absolutely right. I was there, in the room while she passed. I held her hands for days, we talked about so much.

If it was just an affair, she would have told me. But if she raped my husband, she wouldn't have said a word. That's the type of thing horrible people take to the grave. I've also come to the realization that I made a terrible mistake asking my husband to leave for a few days while I gather my thoughts. Not to make excuses, but losing my best friend to cancer, a long cancer fight at that, was brutal. to say that I was devastated, wouldn't do it justice. That it happened only six months ago, I'm still feeling it every day. So to have this thrown on me?

It's like I'm losing her all over again. Either she betrayed me and fucked my husband, or she betrayed me and raped my husband. Not only have I lost her, but now I've lost the good memories, an entire lifetime's worth. It was impossible for me to look at him and not all. also see her, and be struck with the horror and realization of that loss all over again. I felt I needed to be able to break down, grieve, and think without the fresh wave of loss I got every time I saw him. It was wrong of me to ask him to leave, you're right though, and as of a few minutes ago

I've righted this wrong. I called my husband, I apologized, told him I believe him, and begged him to come home. He'll be here in half an hour at most, and I'm going to support my husband the way I know he would have supported me. I've been an often on Reddit user for several years, and sometimes the advice given like these can be a bit hit or miss, but today you guys did good. You've helped me realize not only that I was wrong, and being stupid at that, but that I was hurting the person that needed me the most. I was selfish. I have no idea what we're going to do as far as the potential daughter is concerned, but I can assure you will deal with it together. It's going to take a lot of time,

and probably a lot of therapy, to grieve this new loss. I feel numb now, as though I'll never cry again. My best friend raped my husband, which means she was no friend of mine. She flaunted it, coming to my house, sitting with me, and gabbing. She brought her child here, trying to rub it in his face, right in front of me. She tortured the man I loved, and I was an unknowing party to it. I feel sick to my stomach over how many times she came over, just to hold it over him. I'm honestly at a loss on how to make that up to him.

If you all have any ideas, please feel free to give them to me. I think I'll need all the help I can get. Tomorrow I'm going to take a leave of absence from work, just until we can figure out our next steps, and we can get our heads on straight. Thank you everyone. I hope you enjoy this story. I left my employment to become a homemaker and stand by my spouse. Then my supposedly missing factory reappeared and revealed that my spouse is a companion for affluent older ladies. Not a hard worker like I thought. I, 24F, quit my job to be a stay-at-home wife a couple of months ago because my husband, 25M, was working two jobs and I felt like I needed to hold down the fort at home. I was working as a receptionist and wasn't making much anyway, so it was an easy call to

make. He took up a second job because he wasn't satisfied with his income and sales, so he took up a job for the evenings as well and wouldn't come back home until really late. My husband and I have been married for two years and have been together since we graduated. Neither of us comes from a particularly well-off family and once we graduated, we were on our own. My parents had made it very clear to me that I needed to make my own money because now, it was time for them to save for their retirement and they couldn't keep funding me anymore. And I was okay with that. My husband was an only child and his father passed away a year after our marriage.

marriage and he told me that his mother had passed away when he was just nine, so he had nobody to count on anyway. It took us a while to become financially stable. But for the past couple of months, we had been doing reasonably well. I used to feel bad because my husband was working two jobs, so I quit mine and started doing all the household work, so he would have a nice home to come back to after a really long day of work. This had been going on for a couple of months and I didn't think that there was anything that I needed to be suspicious of. However, a lady claiming to be my mother-in-law showed up at my door while my husband was at her just a couple of days ago and that changed everything. I'll call this woman Sally, she looks around the same age as my mother-in-law, and she matches the few photos of my mother-in-law that my husband still has in old photo albums.

I was shocked when she introduced herself but there was no time for explanations because she just barged into the house and told me that she had something very important to discuss with me. She brought out a bunch of photos and spread them out on the table before I could say anything and then she dropped a bombshell on me by telling me that my husband was apparently a sugar baby for a couple of women, and that's what he spends his day doing. She showed me the pictures and sure enough, all of them were of him being hugged or sitting close by women I didn't recognize. And all of them looked a couple of years older or around the same age as Sally. I didn't even know what to say, but Sally powered through and started telling me that she was

sorry to barge in this way, but she had to come to me as soon as she found out. She told me that she knew that I'd probably been told by my husband that she was no longer in this world. But that was not true, evidently. Apparently, my husband's parents had been divorced because of my father-in-law's infidelity. But my husband chose to live with his father all year round after he turned 13, even though they had partial custody. She found out in a couple of months that this was because my husband had taken up smoking pot at that age and was in very dangerous company. His dad was working most of the day, so he didn't have enough time to keep an eye on his son and even though Sally insisted that he at least tried to be more actively involved in his son's parenting, he didn't seem to care

much and said that he would get out of that habit eventually. That didn't happen, and by the time my husband was supposed to be in college, he had become a total stoner, his grades were slipping and he had no prospects whatsoever. This led to a lot of fighting in their family and my husband decided to cut her off because he didn't like the fact that Sally tried to intervene and get him out of his habits. He did clean up his act eventually because he didn't want to get caught in college with pot since that would lead to a lot of legal trouble for him. But he never spoke to his mother again and after a couple of months, she stopped trying to get through to him too. He pretended that he didn't have a mother at all because of their bad relationship, which is why he lied to me.

She told me she found out about me just recently and had to do a lot of stalking and digging to find out where I lived. Apparently, one of the women who had been spending time with my husband had told her friends about it and that's how Sally found out. She said that she found out through a friend of a friend and when she saw a photo of them, she realized instantly that this was her son. She knew that he was married and had been for quite some time, so she decided to go looking for me and tell me the truth. Because she was sure that her son hadn't told me anything, and she was right. I was in shock because everything that she was saying was just a lot to process. In one afternoon, I found out that not only was my mother-in-law well and alive,

but I also found out that my husband was entertaining other older, rich women for money and not actually working two jobs like he had told me. I was disgusted because I thought that my husband was an honest man but that was not the case and I felt like I barely knew him after Sally's revelation. I wanted to think that she was lying but the photos were right in front of me and I could tell that she had gone to a lot of trouble to obtain these pictures. And there was no way that she would be lying to me about something like this. She stood to gain nothing.

I thanked her for what she did and then she left me alone to think about this for the rest of the day until my husband came back home. He finally returned at around midnight and the first thing that I asked him was about his work. And he told me that everything was great at work and he believed that we could actually move into a bigger home soon if we saved up enough. So then I decided to ask him which of his roster of women he had spent time with today and how much he got paid for it. His expression changed because he knew that he was caught now and there was no way out and I knew the truth.

He didn't even try to deny it and just asked me how I had found out. So I told him that it didn't matter because at the end of the day, I knew where the money was coming from and I knew what work he was putting so much effort into. I had promised myself that I was not going to let him see me cry, but I broke down into tears. and locked myself in the bedroom while screaming at him at the top of my lungs, until I finally wore myself out. He didn't say anything while I was screaming and let me shout at him until I was finally done. Once I fell silent, he started talking and told me that I was misunderstanding everything. He told me that apparently this was not a sugar-baby relationship and he was not hooking up with

these women, but he was just spending time with them since they were mostly lonely widows. And they just wanted somebody to be there with them, talk to them, and spend time. with them in a completely platonic and non-intimate capacity. He said that he had heard about a website from a friend of his and had checked it out. He signed up for it only because he knew that he wouldn't have to get involved with any of these women romantically or otherwise. It was all safe and legal. And it technically wasn't cheating because he was just providing them with companionship. He said that it paid well, probably more than he would have been making at the jobs that he said he was doing and he just wanted to make me happy.

He knew that I was struggling with money and he couldn't find jobs that paid enough for the kind of lifestyle that I wanted, so he was really just doing this for me. I argued with him and told him that I didn't care about the money and that what mattered to me was that he had been lying to me for months and had been making a complete fool out of me. I couldn't come to terms with the fact that not only was he lying to me about this but also about his mother. And if he could lie to me about these things even after we got married, then there was no telling what else he had lied to me about. I told him that Sally had visited me early in the day and had told me the truth about everything including how he was a stoner in school, while he had always told me and maintained that he had never even tried it. He kept saying that he was sorry and that he would quit this job and get off that sight,

but it really meant nothing to me because I didn't trust him anymore. He insisted that he had done everything just to make me happy and to be able to provide me with everything that I wanted but I didn't care. And so, I left that day to go live with a friend of mine until I knew what to do next. It's been four days now and I still have no idea what I want to do. I haven't even told my friend about the truth and I just said that I had a big fight with my husband and I wanted a place to live for a couple of days until it blew over. Because I didn't think I was ready to come out with the truth, it was embarrassing and shameful

and I didn't even want to accept it in my own head. My husband has been texting me every day and he even told me that he deleted his account and has cut ties with all the women that he was spending time with. He said that he has even started looking for a real job, one that I would approve of. I haven't replied to any of his messages yet, mostly because I don't even know what to say to him anymore. Yesterday, I tried to talk to my parents about this and while initially I didn't have any intention of telling them the whole truth, I just couldn't help it and I ended up confessing everything to them. They heard me out and the only thing that they had to say to it was that I needed to talk to him, sort things out,

and move on because that's how marriages are supposed to work. They said that they could understand where I was coming from, but they also realized that my husband was just trying to make me happy by bringing home a considerable income. Just so I wouldn't have to be worried about anything and instead of looking at things negatively, they wanted me to look at the positive side of this and work things out with him.

Honestly, I didn't understand what they were talking about because I was concerned there was no positive side. He had lied to me for months and betrayed me in ways that I didn't even think were possible. I'll admit, I have been a bit of a freak about our finances in the past, but that wasn't something that gave him the license to go out and do something like this. I was already feeling annoyed after I got off that phone call with my parents and my husband chose that very moment to send me yet another text, but this time,

he wasn't being apologetic. He said in his text that he was tired of apologizing over and over again, and he wanted a straight answer from me about where our marriage was headed now and if I wanted to divorce or not. because he felt like I was overreacting since he hadn't even done anything that awful, and neither had he cheated on me. He said that the only thing that he had done wrong was that he had lied to me, but even that was just a white lie so that I wouldn't feel bad.

I was pretty pissed off when I saw that text because it just felt like he was trying to downplay the gravity of the situation and gaslight me into believing that whatever he did was okay. So I texted right back, saying that yes, I did indeed want a divorce because he was a liar and a cheater. And I was going to make sure that I took away everything in the divorce since he'd forced me to quit my job. He was a little put off by that statement and told me that that was a bit harsh since he had only wanted to make me happy. And then he told me that he didn't want a divorce and even if it did end up happening, he didn't think that it was fair of me to ask for everything. Apparently, I'd always been the one going crazy about our finances and hounding him about money so I was the one who drove him to this. To be fair, I was just concerned about the future, which is why I was always worried about money,

and perhaps it was a little too much for him to handle. I didn't mean to free him out with my own paranoid nature, but that's just how I've always been wired. But now, I feel like this might be partly on me as well for freaking him out and pushing him into a corner. At least that's what he's making it mental or emotional state. Ida for freaking my husband out about our finances? Update 1, hi, folks. So I would just like to take a moment to thank everybody who commented on my original post. It really means a lot to me that some of you took the time to actually go into details and everything

about your opinions. And thank you to just everybody who commented for all the support because heaven knows I needed it. It's been a week and a really difficult one at that, since I left my house and my husband. A couple of days back I finally found the courage to tell my friends. the truth about why I was living with her and it's safe to say that she was scandalized. Her reaction really made me believe that I was not just going crazy and my parents and my husband were actually trying to gaslight me into believing that all of this was somehow normal and forgivable. She told me that I needed to file for divorce at the earliest and gather

all the evidence that I can against him. Which might be easy because Sally did leave me with her contact info and I can just reach out to her if I need help. My friend even offered to put me in touch with her parents' divorce lawyer and I think I might go ahead with that option since her mom got a pretty hefty payout and alimony. So I think that's the best choice for me, especially since both her mother and I have been wronged by our husbands who chose the company of other women over us. At least her father had been caught cheating with just one woman. I don't even know the count for my husband. My friend also encouraged me to speak up about this to my other friends, in case I needed more help. I don't think I would need it, but I just want to get this off my chest.

And I think talking to my friends would help because keeping this secret from everybody has really taken a toll on my mental health. When I told my friend that I was feeling embarrassed and ashamed of what had happened, she said something that really made me feel a lot better about this situation and put everything into perspective. It was also something that a couple of you in the comments had told me already. And it was that I was the victim here, and I didn't do anything wrong. So I had no reason to feel ashamed of myself because I had done everything in my power to me. make our marriage work and he was the one who screwed up. Even his accusation of me being paranoid about money and backing him into a corner was just absurd because I'm sure there were a thousand better ways to deal with it, rather than going ahead and pulling off something

like this. I'm still not comfortable referring to what he did and talking about it, so I keep saying something like this, bear with it, please. I haven't talked to my parents either because I really think that what they said on that phone call with them was kind of weird and definitely not the right advice for me. It felt like they were trying to force me to stay in this marriage, in spite of all the lies. Because they, for whatever reason, believe that it's the right thing to do. And I don't really think that I'm misjudging the situation either because they very clearly mentioned on that last phone call that they thought working it out with my husband would be the right thing to do. I really didn't like that advice and I think it's best for us to stay apart for a while because otherwise, they will just keep trying to enforce their opinions onto me and that's really not what I need at the moment.

Update 2, so I filed for divorce a couple of days ago and today, my husband was served. He had been trying to reach out to me recently and had asked me several times to at least meet with him before I did anything but it was just too late. He sent me several messages after he was served, talking about how unfair I was being and that I needed to see both sides before I came to such an insane conclusion. To be honest, I didn't understand what his side could possibly be. because he had already told me his reasons and I didn't think that any of them were valid, which is why I went ahead with the divorce in the first place. Had I thought that any of his reasons were even a little legitimate,

then I might have entertained the idea of meeting him, trying to talk things out, and whatever. But I couldn't think of anything that he could say that could possibly make me forgive him at this stage. He had lied to me about too many things for me to just get over it. And I don't think I can remain married to a person who I don't even trust anyone. and I can't see us rebuilding that trust again because everything that has happened is just a little too much. I told him that I didn't want to talk to him and I just wanted this to be over. Because this was painful for me since now it felt like I was married to a person who I didn't even know. And it was as good as having been with a stranger for these past couple of years.

He sent me another text saying that we could still work things out and he had been looking into marriage counselors for us. But in my opinion, it was he who needed therapy. Because so far, he had always just taken the easy way out. From whatever Sally told me, and also the fact that instead of just sticking to his job and working hard, rising through the ranks, he chose to do something so extreme and then even tried to blame me for it. I was very clear with him and I told him that no matter what, things would just never work out between us ever again and he needed to accept that. He lost me because of his own stupidity and now, there was nothing he could do to win me back over.

even if he turned into a better person overnight, I wouldn't be able to trust him. That's just how badly he had screwed up. After that, he didn't say anything and that was the end of our conversation. But on a slightly happier note, I have started looking for a job because I have to support myself somehow and I don't really think I will be able to afford a lawyer if I don't work. I know my parents aren't going to help because they haven't even tried to talk to me after that phone call and I don't expect them to help either. I do have some money set aside but that won't last me very long, so I'm back on the job market and I even have an interview in a couple of days.

My friend has been really kind to me and has even let me borrow a couple of her work outfits because I had only brought casual clothes with me. She told me that I don't need to worry about paying rent and stuff until I'm back on my feet. And I feel incredibly lucky to have such a great friend like her. Update 3 So that's just three days to go before the first negotiation session for the settlement in alimony and today my husband showed up at my friend's place to try and talk to me in person because I wasn't responding to his texts. I was in the middle of doing laundry when my friend told me that my husband was here and even

offered to force him to leave in case I didn't want to talk to him. But I decided that I was just going to have a conversation with him and be done with this, once and for all. Because I was getting pretty sick of having to take him. tell him the same thing over and over again, that we couldn't get back together and we couldn't work things out because what he did was unforgivable to me. So my friend confined herself to the bedroom, while my husband and I talked in the living room. Yet again, he started off by apologizing to me and I cut him off and told him that there was no need for this because this would just make it ten

times harder for me to go through with the divorce and that's the last thing that I needed. I told him that I wanted him to understand that whatever he did was not okay with me. And no matter how much he apologized, it wouldn't make things right again and it definitely wouldn't help because I just couldn't trust him again. And trying to work on a marriage where I didn't even trust the guy I was married to seemed pretty meaningless to me. So he needed to stop contacting me every couple of days, trying to get me to change my mind because it just wasn't going to work. And then, he started crying and told me that he loved me and he just wanted me to forgive him this one time. It was really hard for me because I loved him too, but I couldn't forget him at the cost of my own dignity.

Then we went silent for a while, after which he got to his feet really abruptly and wiped his face. And then he told me that he'd see me with his lawyer in a couple of days and stormed out of the house. I was kind of shocked, but I guess he finally realized that crying and begging me to take him back was not going to work anymore. I was sad after he left, but mostly just relieved because this just meant that I could go all out and I wouldn't even have to feel bad about it. Because now, we are officially over. So yeah, I guess I will see him in court. I hope you enjoy this story.

Is it wrong of me to refuse my sister my wedding location, even though she is expecting and has a greater need for it? Initial post, segment won my future spouse and I have been together for eight years and engaged for three. I was doing my PhD program and was juggling planning the wedding. My fiancé took much of that work, but it was perfect because our dream venue was booked till after my graduation. So what we did is book our dream venue three years in advance. It is really a beautiful venue. The only slot we got was September of this year. My sister got engaged a

few months ago to her fiancé. They were planning on having a spring wedding next year. They had no venue lined up, but had a few vendors lined up as well as a set date. Yesterday our parents invited us and our soes to a family barbecue, where my sister announced to our extended family, that she is expecting, everyone was so happy for her and my Bill, who is a great guy, my nan asked my sister if the wedding was still on the set date or if they were going to wait. Because of the baby she said no that she hoped to move it to September, NBD, we don't have many out-of-town guests so they could attend to both weddings no problem. My sister then turns around and said that's what I wanted to talk to you about.

I was really, really hoping we could kind of like take your venue. I really cannot stress myself too much with planning a wedding while going to maternity class. and I think it is so beautiful, it would really mean a lot to me. It went silent, but everyone was looking at me expecting me to say, yes, of course, everything for my little sister. My bill looked very uncomfortable and told her that they had talked about this and that it was not okay to put me on the spot, but my sister just said, don't be like that.

My sister wants to do what's best for me so it's no big deal, right? I just said, well, it kind of is, I don't know, I have my heart really. said on the venue, Q the crying, she stormed off. Nan told me that I was being selfish because she needed the venue more than I did. I tried to defend myself and my mother said you waited three years. Would it have killed you to wait a few more months? When has your sister ever asked you for something? A few comments later my fiancé got really mad and we left.

My sister called me crying and said that it was unfair that I always get what I want and that I could have done this one thing for her. Dad said it is just a venue and what matters is the person who you are marrying. He is kind of right. But we have been planning for so long. My fiancé is furious with my family and doesn't even want my sister to come. Now my family is threatening not to come because I'm being selfish and my sister needs it more than me because having a baby is too stressful. Art 2. My bill called me and apologized for the inconvenience.

He told me he had discussed it with my sister and she had told him she would not ask. is properly mad with her now and warned me me for potentially ruining her marriage. My father has sent me about five texts along the lines of I hope you're happy your sister hasn't stopped crying since yesterday and so on and so on. My fiancé and I have decided to boot my sister from the bridal party and replace her with my aunt who is the only family member that took my side. We have not decided whether or not we will invite my family as a whole. Furthermore my mom took it upon her to tell on us. She called fiancée's parents and told them that it would be best if my sister gets it because she is pregnant and preeclampsia runs in the family,

whatever that means. My future father-in-law told them to fuck off and basically ripped my mom a new one for expecting something so ridiculous and that they were going to lose me if they keep playing favorites. So my mom is now crying too and saying that my father-in-law is an ass. This is just getting. So pathetic, it seems straight out of a bad soap opera. My in-laws are driving to us currently with some supper and wine and basically told me to not worry and that no matter what happens that they will be my safety net, I cried of happiness.

Part 3, so it hasn't been that long. But this post blew the hell up, I was expecting only a few answers, but the support was overwhelming. What boggled my mind is that this story flooded over to mainstream media, but let's get to the story, so since this went viral a lot happened. My sister. My sister saw this story while browsing on her raditic, she lost her mind, she accused me of painting her like a loony and misinterpreting facts, info, my sister got wind of the situation due to various media outlets and went on Reddit. She said that I was being unfair,

that she is family and that she asked it nicely because she loves me. She also underlines the fact that the opinion of internet strangers doesn't account because family is more important and I should focus on making my family happy. The only text I sent back was this. I am sorry that you perceived it that way. I did not in any matter distort what happened. As you you might notice I didn't describe your tone nor exaggerated anything. Perhaps you have that night different in your mind than I do, but I digress. I am sick and tired to bending to your will. My whole life I have been your servant and your dormant. Remember all the birthdays I had to share with you because you would throw a tantrum because you didn't get presents? Or when you cried so that I would

fill out job applications for you. But the thing that has hurt me most till now is when you ruin my graduation, I am done, I admit that I also spoiled you but I will not any longer. If you want to marry so bad before your baby is born then you could look at, Hotel X, that offers last-minute weddings. I have spent too much time planning my wedding to gift it to you. And if you want to ruin our relationship. Over this then go ahead, I will sleep sound and safe knowing that it wasn't my fault. She only sent me a wow. You must love me so very much. And blocked me, she unblocked me, she unblocked. locked me this morning to send me this. Meeting planner, hello dear, I got the message from your mother and will proceed with the

re-booking of the venue on the spot. However, this will have extra costs as we have to change the names on the contract. Please come by my office tomorrow so we can sign the new contract slash sister. That's great. I'll be there at nine. My parents. My parents haven't actually written me since the thing with my father-in-law, my older brother. Yes, I have an older brother but he lives in another city and wasn't at the barbecue. That's why I didn't mention him. Plus he initially could not come to the wedding because of work after hearing about all the story.

Contacted me and wanted to know what happened because he got a weird story from Mom and Dad. Mom had told him that I had offered previous to the barbecue to give up the venue to my sister and that I humiliated her. I told him what really happened and he had no problem believing me. We talked a lot about our parents' behavior and he confessed that him moving was partly due to our parents being and I quote, shitheads to us.

us. He told me that mom had gotten wind from the post and was mad at me for betraying my family. I haven't written my parents what so many of you advised me to because I have to come the fact that they love my sister more than me, if they love me at all. The wedding. We sat together and put passwords with majority of our vendors and also with the venue directly, we didn't talk to our planner yet, which is why the text of my sister worries me so much. Also we canceled the catering that my parents paid for, so short term we won't be able to get a full catering like we wanted to, but all our friends and my fiancé's family will help us prepare a buffet, and everyone is going to ship in, that will be our bachelor party. As we will have to spend more on our food now we canceled

our bachelor parties and will have a family and friends cooking session. Thank you again for helping me see how toxic my family is, I will try to sort it out. If they apologize from the bottom of their heart they will be allowed into my wedding but if not. Then well, I still have my brother, who will be walking me down to the aisle, and my aunt. Part four we called my planner and she was actually really horrified. She told me she never had as much as talk to my mother since the day we went to book the venue. She assured me that even if they were to call and say that I wanted it. I had to be present to make any changes, so we informed everyone that will work for us on our wedding and they offered to hire security for that day at a reduced price.

Update. I hope that this time this doesn't get removed, or at least give me some reason damn it mods. Smiley face, a few days have passed and we luckily have sorted many things out, passwords are set with the vendors, security has been hired, recipes for the family and friends cookout have been chosen and I will start therapy soon. Sadly, some upsetting things have happened as well. My sister, of course, is brigading against me on Facebook, making constant passive-aggressive remarks, saying that I made her depressed, etc. I have received many messages from her friends saying that I am bitch for treating her that way, I won't mention what happened to Bill. He wants to tell his story once he is ready. I blocked every attempt at online harassment and my sister as well,

but two days ago my sister's best friend zagged my car, I called the police and my neighbor, whose hobby is to look outside the widow and spy on people, identified them too. She is a grumpy lady but actually very lovely once you get to meet her. Now to the part that has me fuming, after not talking to my parents in several days they called and asked if we could talk. Turns out, I was worried but agreed to meeting them with my fiancé in our apartment. When they arrived you could tell my mom had been crying, and I honestly felt bad for ten whole minutes.

Many of you guys said that they probably played favorites to avoid my sister's meltdowns or that she might have been diagnosed with something and that's why they baby her, well, No, turns out my sister is, like also many of you suspected, just an asshole, no medical history, no diagnosis, nothing. We started chit-chatting awkwardly then we began talking about the matter. My father first asked us why we canceled the caterers, to which my fiancé responded that we didn't want to have anything they could hold over our heads, insert surprised Pikachu face from both of them. Dad acted offended and said he would never so that to which I said better safe than sorry. My mother continued with calling me disrespectful for talking in that manner to them.

I called the disrespectful for all what they had said and done over the last few days. We got in a heated argument about the venue again, to which my father repeated the it doesn't matter where you get married but the person you are marrying bullshit, and finally, finally I gave him the comeback so many of you guys wanted me to give. Yes, Dad, exactly. But isn't it weird how that only applies to me and not my sister? As long as she is marrying Bill it doesn't matter where right? It was dead quiet and my father was red like a tomato and gasping for air like a fish on land.

My mother was quietly crying again and my, so I said, well, I am waiting for your reasoning. My father slapped his hands on the table and went on a rant about family and sacrifices and how a loving family should do what's in their power to make each other happy. I just responded like how you tried to make me happy on my graduation day, you know when sister smashed my cake because she wasn't in the limelight. Quiet again, my mother quietly said, why do you hate us so much? I looked at her and said I could ask you guys the same thing. Again nothing, my parents knew that they had fucked up but they were not ready to admit it. My mother tried to guilt-trip me saying that my sister is miserable,

that she hasn't gone out in days because people judge her so much. My father went on a tangent on how my little sister just needs more time and attention because she is the youngest, etc. So basically excusing her behavior, I told them that I felt hurt because I now saw their blatant favoritism, that they didn't even try to conceal the fact that they loved my sister more. My mother tried to say that's not true, we love you all the same, I wasn't having it. I opened the list I had written on my phone where I had written every point I could remember about them putting my sister before me. It was a very long list. Some had dates to it. Some were more specific situations. When I was finished, my parents were horrified, betrayed, and near tears.

They wanted to start explaining again how I was wrong, but I said that this conversation was leading nowhere. They either set family counseling up for us and apologize to me or they won't be invited to the wedding. They left and haven't called since update to the wedding finally. I get around to writing an update. I am sorry that it took so long but I have a few updates to my life. I guess, however, that you guys are mainly here to see how much. my wedding played out in the aftermath with my family. After I last spoke to my parents, they did not let go of their position, I was the bad guy, I was responsible for my sister's depression and her failing relationship, it went so far that I had to block them and change my

number as they were contacting me from relatives' phones and so on. It was a real bummer. Especially during a time that should be so special, I was harassed by my sister and her entourage on Facebook and Instagram, so I simply deleted it. It was a mentally draining. It was a mentally draining time, but, my husband's family and friends and my brother helped me get through it, I had basically cut off every family member that had given me shit for keeping my wedding date. My nan came to my door a few days before the wedding begging to let her come. I had a long talk with Nan and she ended up apologizing even though she still failed to see the logic in switching weddings, but she did not want to pressure me and wanted to be there for me. We hugged it out, but our relationship is

not back to normal yet. The bachelor party was amazing. We were cooking until dawn and everything turned out to be delicious, my husband made a beautiful three-layered cake. Wedding Day. The morning was really good and relaxing, my bridesmaids and I got ready, we drank some Perseco made pictures, my dress fit perfectly and I just looked gorgeous, but then came time to leave for the ceremony. We were at the venue making before pictures with my friends when I saw the little car of my sister approaching the venue. Admittedly I was shitting my pants, or well my dress. One of my friends run to the venue to get one of the security people that we hired, I really didn't want another Hulk smash moment at my wedding, she had been angry crying,

and as soon as she saw me she started screaming obscenities. Apparently I am a filthy bitch that made her fiancé break up with her. She was like possessed and at that moment I couldn't but feel pity for her. A thing to explain is that in the mornings the plants are always watered at the venue by some of these sprinkler systems. Thus the earth was a bit muddy, the next thing happened really fast. My sister bent down to take mud and was getting ready to throw it at me and my dress when my maid of honor sprinted towards her and pushed her so that she fell with her but into the flowers, the security officer arrived seconds later and removed her, and with that, I had enough ammunition to file for a restraining order against her.

I didn't even want to file a police report at this point I just wanted her to stay away from me. The rest of the day was just amazing. I married my best friend, the love of my life and just my rock. My brother walked me down the altar. We all cried at the vows. It was just spectacular, of course, I miss my parents, but it is what it is. The celebration was very funny. My husband had studied a choreography to a Taylor Swift song with his groomsman and the speeches could have been from a stand-up club. We left for our honeymoon and when we came back I decided to start looking for jobs in a

different city. I didn't want to lose my friends, but I just felt like I needed a clean break. I got a new job at a university in a bigger city and we are currently in the process of moving. But maybe the biggest change and also the most cliche. change is that I am pregnant. It is a classic honeymoon baby. We haven't really told anybody now in fear of something happening so you nice people of Reddit are the first ones to know. Besides my husband and me, I am so excited that I am tearing up just writing this. This was not something we planned for a few years, but we are ecstatic regardless. I have only heard through people

in town about the rest of my family. My sister is still going around telling people that I was the reason Bill broke up with her and that I was trying to docks her or some shit. She has moved in with my parents again and refuses to work. Nan told me that the last time she saw my parents they looked exhausted because my sister was behaving like a baby. I guess their parenting is catching up with them. I can only say that I am really happy right now. It hurts having lost family but at the end of the day cutting out toxic people is the best I could do. I now have a husband and a honeymoon baby on the way, my very own family. Oh, and a shiny backbone. Thank you. read it for reassuring me that I indeed was not being selfish.

That my family was not in the right. Thank you so much for just writing your comment supporting me. I even took up therapy but I have to say I am really enjoying life. Thank you for everything. This is the update to the graduation story mentioned in the post. Hulk smash graduation cake. Some people ask me for the graduation story I talked about in my last post and as I am sick and bored out of my mind I will tell you the story.

This wasn't too long ago, so I remember it quite good. It was the day I delivered my thesis and presented it, a German tradition is that once you complete your PhD you get one of those black graduation caps that have pictures, memes and little toys that describe you best, glued on them. So I also got that I absolutely loved, one of the things glued on my cap, were gummy worms because I would eat them constantly. We had booked a little hall in the university to celebrate,

my fiancé and friends had decorated it, provided coffee, snacks, drinks, etc. Also my fiancé had crafted a beautiful cake, one of those that have a self-made marshmallow fondant and a color gradient that went from yellow to pink, really beautiful cake. So eventually after snacking, talking and even dancing a bit it was time for the speeches, my friends and my boss said how proud they were, etc., and then came my fiancé. He talked about all my accomplishments and my life up to this point. My sister absolutely lost it, I mean she screamed and cried like I had killed her cat. My mom was giving my BF signs to stop his speech and went running towards my sister.

My father was already kneeling besides her calming her down. Everybody was kind of lost at this point. My mom came up to me and asked me to do a little speech mentioning the accomplishments of my sister and all that. I asked why, my mom told me about her being rejected from her master's program and that that was the reason for her breakdown. I suppose I looked annoyed because my mom snapped and said, you know what forget it. She then told my dad, who had managed to calm my sister down, to take her home. My dad took her by the arm and they started to walk out. And Holly Hell, as my sister noticed the cake she lost it again, crying like a maniac and the she smashed my eff in cake.

Everyone went silent. My dad dragged my sister out without so much as apologizing. My mom just muttered my poor baby. Then I started crying. My friends and fiancé went to cheer me up, but my mom was texting dad to see if my sister was all right. She followed me to the bathroom and reprimanded me for not acting when I saw my sister crying. I told her that I was hurt by all the scene. My mom just said that I had to understand my little sister, because it was a hard time for her and that she didn't have a fancy graduation like me. She then left.

We tried to keep the celebration, but it was not really possible. We went home early. When I went to look for my cap, I found that the gummy worm package that was glued to it had been ripped out, as I later found out that was my sister's doing because she was craving gummy worms. I hope you enjoy this story. My siblings' former partner entrusted their children to me while I was in a job interview, so I reached out to him. As a result, she is at risk of losing custody, and our father is considering excluding me from his inheritance. if I, don't fix it. My step-sister Lucy, 36F, has 10-year-old twin boys with her ex-husband Gerald, 35M. My dad married Lucy's mother when we were in high school after they met through friends. Lucy's dad had passed away when she was little and my parents had been separated ever since I was three years old. My dad had full custody and my mother only had visiting rights because she had

early onset dementia and passed away when I was in middle school. Lucy is three years. years older than me and when our parents introduced us to each other, she was 15 and I was just 12. She was kind of older than me and had this air around her, as if I was beneath her and she didn't reciprocate my attempts to make friends with her. Our parents were in a relationship for three years, but she never tried to get to know me or befriend me, probably because I wasn't cool enough for her. I don't know what it was, but for some reason, she never seemed to like me much. At first, I thought I was imagining it, but with time I realized that she just didn't. didn't want me around which was difficult to accept because I had been really excited about

getting a big sister. There were times when I would try to talk to her but she would just roll her eyes at me and on more than one occasion, she slammed her door shut when she saw me outside her room. The funny part was that I would just be minding my own business and playing on my own, it just happened to be right outside her room. It felt like my existing around her was a problem, even if I wasn't trying to talk to her. I didn't understand the concept of Tin once at that point and I used to feel terrible because of how she used to treat me. But I kept trying to befriend her until I finally reached an age where I could understand that she just wasn't into it and we could never be friends. So after our parents got married, I stopped trying to be her friend.

By then I was 15 and she had just turned 18. She was about to graduate and move out for college so it didn't matter anyway if we were friends or not because we wouldn't be living in the same house for long. Once she moved out for college, she would only come back for the hospital. She would only come back for the holidays or occasionally on the weekends and after she got a job, even those visits reduced considerably. I also moved out when I started college and got my own apartment a few months after I graduated. Now that both of us were living on our own, we would only get together on the holidays or come back home to see our parents sometimes. We didn't keep in touch once we moved out and were practically strangers who met once or maybe twice a year. Lucy actually met Gerald because of me

because I was the one who invited him home for our Christmas party one year. Gerald's sister, Joanna, was in college with me and we remained close friends even after we graduated. One year, she told me that her parents were out of town for Christmas since one of their close family friends was sick and they were visiting him. She mentioned that she and her brother were bored at home because everyone else seemed to have plans with their family already. So I invited her and her brother home so they could celebrate Christmas with us and that's how Lucy met Gerald. They spent the entire evening together and a few weeks later, Joanne told me that they were going out together. I thought it was sweet and was very happy for them when they announced that they were getting married after two years of being together. Joanna and I were both bridesmaids, which felt really strange.

Lucy and I had never been close and yet I was a bridesmaid at her wedding. But she was actually nice to me after she started dating Gerald and finally acknowledged my existence. It was probably because Joanna and I were close. and it wouldn't be a good look for her if I started telling her the way she used to treat me when I was younger, like she was too good for me and I was a blip in her otherwise perfect life. But she had no reason to worry because that was all in the past and I didn't even care about that stuff anymore. So I wasn't going to bring it up with Joanna and try to sabotage her relationship because I stood nothing to gain from doing that. However, I didn't mind the fact that she was being

nice to me just so I would keep my mouth shut about stuff from the past. And I can tell you guys for a fact that the only reason she started being nice to me was because she didn't want me to blab. Because as soon as she hit a rough patch with Gerald, she stopped pretending to be my friend and cut ties with me. Throughout their relationship and their marriage, she would text me once a week, check up on me and be all friendly with me but that went out of the window as soon as Gerald filed for divorce. She would do the same for Joanna so I knew that it was completely. obligatory and she was doing this only because she would have to see us as every family get together or birthdays and anniversaries. They stayed together for three years so she was my friend for

almost five years back then, but then the divorce proceeding started and we went back to being strangers again. I didn't know why they were getting divorced because by then they already had a child and it just happened really suddenly. I couldn't ask Lucy the reason why she was getting a divorce because she clearly didn't feel the need to pretend to be my friend anymore, so I asked Joanna because I was sure that Gerald would have told her. And so I found out that the two of them had been fighting about money because Lucy had been spending money like there was no tomorrow, which wasn't surprising because she always had been a spendthrift

and had no sense of financial responsibility. Gerald had tried to talk to her and explained to her that now that they had kids, they couldn't keep spending money without thinking of the future and they had to start saving. Lucy didn't take it well and she told him that since she was an earning member of the family she could do whatever she wanted to with her money and it was not his place to tell her what she could and couldn't do. However, Lucy earned a lot less than her husband, but she spent a lot more than what she earned. So mathematically, she wasn't exactly spending just her own money since she would often make withdrawals from their joint account to make insanely ridiculous and unnecessary purchases.

She had purchased a new car for her personal use without even talking to him just a few weeks before they had that discussion and that's actually what had pushed him into talking to her because she had absolutely no need for a new car when her old one was working just fine. When Gerald brought up that she had used his hard-earned money to buy that car, she flipped out at him and started cursing him out. She called him a miser and said that he didn't care for anybody but himself, which was way out of line because the only reason he was even asking her to think about her finances was because he cared for her and their kids and wanted a better future for their family.

She really crossed the line when she dug up a stack of cash from her purse, flung it at his face in a fit of anger, and told him that she would pay him back for the car, but until then, he could keep this and stop begging for money from her. That effectively put an end to their marriage and they got divorced soon after. She got to keep the car, just by the way. It's been seven years since then and I haven't been in touch with Lucy, mostly because she cut ties with me, as well as with Joanna and Gerald. We do meet each other on the holidays, but she ignores me now,

unlike earlier when she would at least greet me but I don't care because I don't like her much either. Especially not after what Joanna had told me about the reason behind her divorce because I realized she was just an arrogant and stuck up brat and had always been that way. So now suffice it to say that she and I are not friends in any way whatsoever. They have shared custody of the boys and they spend half the year with Lucy and the other half with Gerald. The only time I even meet her kids is when Joanna and I are asked to babysit by Gerald. The three of us have kept in touch and are pretty great friends actually, so it's not uncommon for me to look after the twins whenever Gerald's too busy or Joanna's unavailable.

And it's not like Lucy isn't aware of this, she knows and she still acts cold towards me. We haven't spoken to each other in ages and I didn't think I was ever going to talk to her anyway. But a few weeks ago, she approached me herself because she wanted me to watch the boys for a while because she had work. It was her turn to have the kids and when she showed up at my house, she told me that the sitter hadn't shown up and she couldn't get through to Gerald. She wasn't willing to contact Joanna because she didn't trust that girl and she couldn't ask our parents to watch the kids because they were out of town and none of her friends were interested in looking after the boys. It was a Saturday so they didn't have school either but Lucy had an

important appointment with a client and she was already running late for the meeting, so I was the only person that she could turn to. under normal circumstances would have taken them in no questions asked but i had a really important job interview lined up and i couldn't have two kids running around the house during the interview i love the twins but they can be quite a handful and they're really loud and unruly sometimes i tried to tell lucy that i couldn't watch them because i had worked to attend to but she told me that it didn't matter much because i work from home so i could manage this but she had to go attend the meeting in person She couldn't postpone this because it was an important client and they'd get busy after this so I told her that I was literally in the same situation.

However, she insisted that she had to go meet her client in person and it was different for her. I tried to tell her that even if I did work from home, I still needed a certain peace and quiet and I wouldn't be able to watch the kids and do my work. And besides, I had a job interview today and it was a really important one because it would mean better pay and a better position. I couldn't mess this up because opportunities like these are hard to come by but Lucy didn't seem to care. She pushed the kids inside my house and told me that I was watching them until she was done with her meeting and she would pick them up in the evening. But until then, I had to look after them whether I wanted to or not because that's what it meant to be a family and I couldn't shirk my duties so I had to suck it up and deal with it. Of course, I didn't like that because as I mentioned above, we are definitely not a family and she has never treated me as such. And we can't become family just for one day according to her convenience.

She left in a hurry before I could even tell her to stop and take her kids with her. She had started driving away as soon as the kids were inside. For the first couple of seconds, I didn't know what to do because I had to hop onto the meeting in an hour and I needed the kids to be picked up before that. My first instinct was to call their father, but just like Lucy had told me, the calls wouldn't go through. So I decided to call Joanna and luckily, she answered so I. I explained the situation to her and she was at my place in no time. She took the kids away with her even though she had a day off, but I was so happy that she was sacrificing it just to help me out. My interview went great and I ended up getting the job but things didn't end well for Lucy.

After the interview I received a call from Gerald, Joanna had already told him everything and when he called me, he told me that he had been unavailable in the morning because there had been some issue with the electric circuit in his house. And every single electronic appliance in his house was busted when he woke up, including his phone, since it had been charging overnight. It had been a crazy morning for him and he hadn't been able to receive any calls because his phone was dead. He'd left his laptop at work the previous day as well. He told me that he had to run around town in person to find an electrician and get everything fixed. He also had to get a new phone because he couldn't get his old one to work and that's how he could finally talk to us.

The universe had a line just perfectly to screw everything up for literally every single person involved and it had been an insane morning for all of us. But Lucy was the only one who had acted selfishly and just abandoned her kids with me. I told Gerald that I had told her several times that I couldn't look after them because I had a job interview but she still pushed them inside and told me that I had to look after them because I was apparently family now and it was my duty. I hadn't told Joanna about the argument in the morning that day because I was in such a hurry but in the evening. I explained everything to both of them and told them all about the argument and how she had forced me to take the kids in and driven away before I could oppose it. Gerald seemed very annoyed while I was telling them about it and later on I found out that was because apparently, this was not even the first time that Lucy had pulled off something like this.

This had been happening quite frequently in the past couple of months where Lucy would just drop the kids off at her relatives' place. or worse, their common friends' homes, on the pretext of having important work to attend to and then drive away before they could protest. Some of them would deal with it and look after the kids, but most of them would end up calling Gerald and asking him to pick up the kids because they were not ready to watch them on such short notice. He had told Lucy several times that this was negligent and really irresponsible of her. It was also very embarrassing for him because more often than not, he would have to be the one to apologize to whoever she had inconvenienced. But she said that since it was her turn to have the kids, she could decide whatever she wanted to

and he needed to stay out of it. She would refuse to call Gerald, Joanna, or me for help because of course she was too proud to do it. But she had to turn to me that day because apparently, everybody else had refused to even open the door to her since they didn't want to give up their Saturday watching her kids. We found out about that recently, after Gerald's asked around to strengthen his case to get full custody. They had been fighting over Lucy's behavior ever since she received that promotion and her workload increased.

Because now she was neglecting her kids and after the incident with me, he decided that he had enough and it was time that he applied for full custody. There were also a couple of other things that had been bothering him because Lucy had been spoiling the kids rotten while they were living with her

and it was always a task for him to get them to behave when they started living with him. For years, he would try to teach them to behave themselves, but Lucy believed in letting boys be boys and so she would let them run wild around the house without bothering to discipline them or teach them right from wrong. So by the time they came back to Gerald, all the hard work that he had put in during his half of the year would be undone. He said he couldn't take any more of this and soon after that day, he filed for full custody, which turned out to be the worst for me because my dad is now losing

his mind since Lucy might end up losing custody of her children. He called me the day that Lucy was served and told me to fix this in whatever way that I could, by speaking to Gerald or Joanna and making sure they know that Lucy is really a great mother. I told him I wasn't going to do any of that and Lucy is not even close to a good mother, so it will be doing the kids a huge favor if I don't interfere in the custody battle. But he insisted that I do what he said or else he would cut me out of his will and never speak to me again. He says that Lucy hasn't stopped crying ever since she was served and he believes that this is all my fault because I should have just watched the kids for a while that day instead of throwing a fit about it and getting the others involved.

I don't understand how this is my fault because Lucy has never been my friend, she can't just show up one day and expect me to treat her like family and do whatever she asks me to. And honestly, even if Gerald had been the one to approach me that day, which he never would have without prior notice, I still would have said no and he would not have forced me either. That's what a good parent does. They take responsibility for their kids instead of forcing other people to take them in. I tried to argue with my father and talk some sense into him, but he wouldn't listen to me and gave me an ultimatum. He told me that I could either talk to Gerald and get this fixed or I would lose him. I'd have for telling my stepsister's ex-husband that she dumped her kids on me

on the day of my job interview. Update 1. Hey, so a lot of you have been asking about my relationship with my father. Well, it's okay. I was actually a lot closer to my mom when she was alive. But anyway, coming to my dad, he and I have had a normal relationship growing up. Right now we are not that close and haven't been ever since I moved out. He has been a busy man throughout my life and I haven't ever really had the chance to really build a relationship with him. It's not bad but it's not great either. It's somewhere in the middle.

I believe that he and Lucy are pretty tight right now, which is why he is on her side, even though it's the wrong side of history. My stepmom and I have also never been close, but she hasn't ever been as horrible to me as other stepmoms could be. I guess what I'm trying to say is that I have just always had a normal relationship with all of them. It's never been bad, but it's never been great either, just neutral. I also just want to make it clear that I couldn't have changed the time of my meeting because that would have seemed unprofessional. I was already asking them to conduct the interview on a Saturday since I was working every other day. Also, I shouldn't have to change my routing to accommodate someone else's kids.

The very belief that I should is pretty absurd. There's also been a lot of hue and cry about us working Saturdays, but I don't see what the big deal is. It's just a couple of times in a one-off thing. Nobody works every weekend. It's nothing uncommon really, especially given the current work culture in our line of work. I'm a social media marketing specialist and my sister works in advertising. As far as I know, working Saturdays isn't unheard of. So I hope that clears things up since many of you were confused as to why I had an interview on a weekend. Also, just to be clear, Gerald and I became friends after he started dating Lucy.

So, there, I hope that clears everything. Update 2. It's been a week since I posted here and the custody battle has already started, so it's too late for me to do anything but my father has still been trying to get me to talk to Gerald and do something about it. this. He thinks that I'm the only one who can do something because he is my friend and he might listen to me. He has also been playing the family card relentlessly, just like Lucy had tried to, and says that I should think about her first. I have tried to explain to him that it's too late for me to do anything and I also don't want to say anything about this because it's not my place. This is between the kids' parents and since I'm not even a blood relative to them, I think it would be really inappropriate for me to try and get him to

stop. In addition to that, I also don't want to do this because I don't think Gerald is in the wrong. I think he is doing the right thing by trying to get full custody of his children. It's the best thing for all of them in the long run. Lucy is arrogant, rude, and entitled and I don't think she is a good influence on the kids. She is going to raise them to be exactly like herself and why would anybody want that to happen, least of all their father. I haven't said that to my dad but if he bothers me again, then I just might snap and say that because that's exactly what I think. Funnily enough, while my dad has been fighting for Lucy and talking her up to get me to change my mind, she hasn't had a word for me. I don't think she has much to say anyway because she knows

that this is just her own fault. Update 3. So I received a call from my dad's lawyer today and he told me that my dad was cutting me out of the will since I hadn't done what he had asked me to. It's been three weeks since my last update and I have been busy with my new job. There is a lot that I have to catch up on and I have a lot on my plate right now, so I can't afford to waste my time dealing with my dad and his antics. So I told his attorney that I was fine with it and then I hung up before he could say anything else. My dad found that very insulting so he took it upon himself to visit me and tell me that he was

very disappointed in how I was behaving. He came by in the evening, just as I got off work and even when I told him. him that I wasn't interested in talking to him right now because I had a really long day. He refused to leave and told me that we needed to have this conversation. But I stood my ground and I refused to let him in, so he stood on the porch and began to lecture me about the importance of family. He told me that I had ruined Lucy's life by complaining about her to Gerald knowing that he would jump at the opportunity to take her kids away from her because he was apparently a selfish

man who cared about nothing but himself and only wanted to make her suffer because he still held a grudge against her for whatever had happened in the past. Now, I could have told my father that this couldn't be further from the truth, but there was no point because he was only going to believe what Lucy had told him. So instead I satisfied myself by telling him that he could continue to tell himself that she was the one who was right and everybody else was wrong. He was free to do whatever he pleased as long as he kept me out of it so if you wanted to then he could talk to Gerald and try to defend Lucy but I wasn't going to do his dirty work for him. Then I tried to shut the door but he started yelling at me and said that I had no loyalty. towards my family and I ignored it. When he realized that I wasn't going to let him get to me, he decided to strike a really low blow and said that it was probably for the best that I didn't

have any kids of my own because I would make a terrible mother. And then he turned around to go back home because he knew that he had hit me where it hurt. Don't get me wrong, I love my life as it is. But I have found myself wishing that I had a family of my own as well. I have had boyfriends in the past, but it's never lasted long enough for me to get serious and I have been really hurt in relationships. Because my longest relationship ended with the guy cheating on me, so I couldn't bring myself to trust people again for a really long time. He and I had been together for several years, almost five, and had even been planning to get married. But unfortunately, it ended when I found out that he had been having an affair with his secretary. That relationship had come to an end just a

couple of years ago and everybody in the family had known about it because I had been depressed in the aftermath of the breakup and it had taken me a really long time to get back on my feet again. I'm doing better now and have moved on. But it still hurts when people bring it up. And for my own father to use it against me I couldn't believe that he was actually making a mockery out of something so awful but I got over it pretty soon once I realized that this guy wasn't my dad anymore. This was Lucy's family coming after me because I had hurt her. My dad was long gone and now I had no parents, so I had no need to feel bad about what a stranger said to me. Thinking about it like that made it really easy for me to deal with.

It still kind of hurts, but it's done now and the only thing I can do is cut them all out of my life for good. Forward slash Forward slash Update 4. So this is going to be a short update for those of you who were asking about what happened with the custody case. I'm sure that this will not come as a surprise to anyone but Gerald got full custody of the kids. We all saw it coming and we were really happy for him, as well as the kids, because this is what is best for them. Lucy wasn't happy about it and decided that she was going to get back at us by running her mouth all over town and telling everybody that we had ruined her life and stolen her kids from her. It's ironic that she has been talking so much about how much she misses her kids, but it's been almost a month since she lost custody of them and yet she hasn't even been to visit them once. She still has visiting rights so there is no excuse for this and it just comes.

goes to show how little she cares about them. And that she has only been talking about the kids for sympathy. A mother who uses her kids to gain sympathy doesn't deserve them anyway, in my opinion. At least Joanna and I still get to see them. They missed their mom, but they'll be fine. My work is also going pretty well. I haven't spoken to anyone whom I dislike so I really don't have any regrets right now. I hope you enjoy this story.

mother-in-law went crazy at my celebration for the impending arrival of my child and she made hurtful comments, attempted to choose a name for my baby but ultimately got taken into police custody following a disruptive outburst. I am a 29-year-old woman who is married. My wonderful husband, Gary, and currently pregnant with our first child. It's been a super exciting journey so far. Gary and I have been together for a long time and got married four years ago. We have been trying to get pregnant since last year and were overjoyed when we discovered my pregnancy six months ago. We have navigated the ups and downs of life side by side. The news of a little one on the way has added a whole bunch of happiness to our relationship.

Every day brings us a bit closer to meeting our little nugget, and we can't wait. For me, pregnancy has been a roller coaster of feelings, from the thrill of finding out to those sweet moments when you can feel your baby start kicking your stomach. Gary has been my rock throughout all of this. He's been to every doctor's appointment. We read parenting books together, and he's even helping set up a cute nursery for our soon-to-arrive baby. We're in full baby mode now, talking about names,

decorating the nursery, and making plans for the future. Gary is super excited to be a dad, and it warms my heart. He's all in, sharing the load of getting ready for the baby. We're facing the challenges and fun parts of preface. together, enjoying every moment as we get ready to meet our little one. Two months back, we decided it was time to share the exciting news about my pregnancy with our family. We made sure we crossed the crucial first trimester milestone and were completely certain before spreading the joy to our loved ones. We had invited all our parents, close family, and friends for lunch.

They arrived, expecting a regular lunch, but upon noticing my growing stomach, their expressions shifted to expressions of joy and amazement. My mother started crying when she saw me and confirmed that I was indeed pregnant. She understood why we had kept the news secret and was overjoyed to be a grandmother soon. She completely understood why we had kept it a secret and expressed her excitement about becoming a grandmother soon. However, Gary's mother, Barbara, had a completely different reaction. Instead of sharing in the joy, she reacted angrily upon learning that we had kept the pregnancy hidden. She felt left out and accused me specifically of intentionally excluding her. Despite my attempts to explain the reason behind our decision, she continued to look pissed and refused to engage with me

further. Her disapproval cast a shadow over what should have been a joyful family occasion. Throughout the night, Barbara didn't address me at all. She displayed disrespect not only towards me but also towards my mother, who had always been nothing but kind to her during their previous encounters. Barbara remained unresponsive during discussions, buried in her phone while everyone else engaged in the family gathering. It was clear that she was upset and her discontentment was palpable. She openly expressed to everyone how she had no idea about my pregnancy, making her feel as if she had lost precious time with a grandchild who hadn't even been born yet. My husband and one of his brothers picked up on her frustration. As the tension escalated, I reached a breaking point and decided to

step out for a moment to gather myself. My mother, who noticed my distress, came to comfort me until I felt composed enough to return. As the night came to an end, Barbara made a deliberate point of saying goodbye to me last after observing the disapproving stares from my husband, sister, and parents. The entire day, she barely exchanged more than a high and by with me. Later, my husband walked them to the car, where they ended up having a heated argument which I could here clearly standing in the foyer. Barbara took the opportunity to vent her complaints about me, further escalating the strange situation. Thankfully, all our guests had left by this moment so it was just me, my parents, Gary, and his parents. She angrily told him that she couldn't believe that I had

the audacity to keep this pregnancy from her and that I did not consider family at all. My husband calmly let her know that he and I had both decided to wait until we were out of the danger zone and that everything was fine before sharing the news with everyone. Hearing this, Barbara started yelling. This is how their conversation went, Barbara, this is our grandchild we're talking about. I deserve to know from the very beginning. Gary, Mom, it's not about deserving or not. It was a decision we made together.

She just wanted to be cautious. Barbara, cautious? I am her mother-in-law. She should have trusted me with this. This is all her fault. This is when my husband lost his temper. Up until this point, he had held himself back, but when he heard his mother continue to accuse me, I watched his face get red in anger. He firmly told his mother that he didn't want to tell her as well, so if she was blaming me she should blame him as well.

He continued to tell her that she needed to get over this and stop overreacting. Barbara told him that he should open his eyes as he was letting me control everything and as his mother, she should have been the first to know if her son was having a grandchild. My husband stood his ground and asked her to stop attacking me and that he loved her, but she needed to leave and cool off before saying something she would later regret as Barbara stormed away, leaving my husband standing there, visibly frustrated and disappointed with his mother's reaction. I was unaware of the tears streaming down my face. The sharpness of her words had left me hurt and bewildered.

Gary, quick to notice my distress, rushed to comfort me and gently, guided me back into the house. My parents, sensing the tension, graciously stayed back until I felt emotionally composed and reassured. Barbara didn't just stop there. Later that night, I received a message from her, and my anxiety heightened, anticipating the content. Her message read, I must say, I am deeply disappointed in you. You knowingly kept a significant piece of information from me and I find that absolutely unforgivable. I can't believe you would write you. I'm me of the joy of knowing about my grandchild from the very beginning. This is not how a family should operate, and I find it disrespectful and hurtful. Instead of apologizing to me for your immature

action, you are now causing a divide between me and my son. Shame on you. Her words cut through me, and I couldn't help but feel a mix of anger and hurt. I showed the message to Gary, and he was beyond pissed. He couldn't fathom why his mother would react so negatively and place the blame squarely on me. Gary decided to call her, warning her not to send such negative messages as it might distress me further. He even went as far as to threaten to cut her off if this behavior continued. Gary's words and his angry tone seemed to have an impact on Barbara. Faced with the possibility of being cut off, she changed her tune. Instead of acknowledging her own role in the conflict, she proposed a solution she claimed the only way she could forgive us for what

she perceived as a slight was if we allowed her to throw us a baby shower. This sudden turn of events left us both surprised and skeptical about her motives. She continued to plead how nothing would bring her more joy than to throw a grand celebration for me and her grandchild where she would be taking care of everything. Gary looked at me curious, but I remained skeptical with the sudden change in her voice. To me, Barbara's sudden change of heart seemed more like a tactical move to regain control and assert her dominance rather than a genuine attempt at reconciliation. Despite my reservations, Gary, always wanting to find a middle ground and keep the peace, entertained the idea of accepting her offer. I express my concerns to Gary, stressing that accepting

her offer might only fuel her belief that her behavior was acceptable. Gary understood my perspective but told me that he hoped that by allowing his mother to throw a baby shower for me could be a way for us to mend fences and create a more harmonious family environment before the baby arrived. I begrudgingly agreed and Gary informed his mother to go ahead with the planning for my baby shower. She was overjoyed and expressed her gratitude for allowing her to take charge. Despite entrusting her with the responsibility, I had assumed there would be some level of collaboration, where she would seek my input and consider my preferences for my own baby shower. With the events still a month away, I anticipated more detailed planning.

to unfold in the coming week. However, to my dismay, I discovered that my mother-in-law had gone rogue. She took it upon herself to purchase all the decorations, choose the games, and plan activities without consulting anyone, including me. When my mother reached out to her to discuss the baby shower, my mother-in-law simply informed her that everything had been decided and that it would be a surprise for me. The lack of communication and consideration left me feeling disheartened and frustrated, as the event meant to celebrate a joyous occasion was now being shaped without any regard for my preferences or wishes. On the day of my baby shower, the air was filled with a mix of excitement and tension. I arrived at the venue, a local banquet hall, surrounded by my close friends who were eager to celebrate the upcoming arrival of our little one.

As I walked in, I couldn't help but noticed the outrageous decorations that my mother-in-law had chosen. A sea of brown and beige balloons adorned every corner, depicting a theme that was entirely her creation. I absolutely hated the decoration as this looked like a misguided attempt at a safari theme gone wrong. The overwhelming presence of brown and beige clashed with the vibrant atmosphere I had envisioned for the celebration. I had imagined soft pastels and delicate touches for my baby shower, but clearly, my mother-in-law had gone the opposite way, the tension in the air escalated when my eyes fell upon an eye-catching display near the entrance, an enormous banner featuring an elaborate collage of my husband's baby

pictures with Barbara. Everyone looked at it confused as we couldn't understand why she would choose to display my husband's baby pictures during my baby shower. I looked at her questioningly and she laughed it off saying that she expected our baby to look exactly like my husband and she was very proud of how cute my husband was as a child hence she wanted to display it for everyone. I stared at her trying to comprehend if she had actually lost her mind. It was clear that she was determined to make the day more about her own experiences as a mother than about the imminent addition to our family. As more guests began to arrive, their expressions ranged from confusion to polite discomfort looking around the room. The sea of brown and beige balloons, coupled with

the towering banner showcasing my mother-in-law and my husband, created an ambience that was far from the elegant and joyous atmosphere I had envisioned for my baby shower. I exchanged apologetic glances with some of my friends, who clearly shared my sentiment. When my mother walked in, her eyes widened in shock, observing the absolute horror that my mother-in-law had unleashed upon the venue. Her eyes then locked onto the banner, and I could sense her disbelief at the audacity of showcasing a collage that, instead of celebrating my baby's arrival, seemed more like an exhibition of my husband's childhood. In a bold move, my mother walked over to the banner, her expression shifting from disbelief to determination. Without uttering a word, she firmly grabbed hold of the banner, decisively removing it from its prominent display. The room fell silent, and all eyes turned toward my mother as she carried away the intrusive display that overshadowed the celebration.

I couldn't help but feel a surge of gratitude toward my mother for her unwavering support. My mill who was busy talking to other guests looked in horror watching my mother throw the banner into the dustbin. In a disapproving tone, she asked, what do you think you're doing? doing. That banner was a special touch to celebrate the baby and the family. My mother, undeterred by the disapproval, responded with a firm yet composed voice. This celebration is about my daughter and her baby, not a showcase of your personal achievement. The guests around them were drawn to this unexpected confrontation. My mill, sensing the attention shift, tried to regain control of the situation. Well, I thought it would be nice for everyone to know who's responsible

for this beautiful event. As I was responsible for throwing this lovely event, I wanted everyone to see how cute Gary was as a child, she retorted, attempting to mask her annoyance. Undeterred, my mother continued, Barra, you begged my daughter to allow you to throw this baby shower for her after how you behaved with her last time. This is my daughter's baby shower and not a platform for your personal agenda or attempt to steal the spotlight. The room hushed as the exchange unfolded, with guests glancing at each other in discomfort. My Mill, realizing that her attempt to dictate the narrative had backfired, retreated with a forced smile and returned to her conversations with other guests. The baby shower continued after that with me trying my best

to focus on the positive energy from my friends and family despite the tension that was lingering throughout the event. I thought there would be no other surprises from my Mill who seemed to be drinking a little too much for a baby shower, but there was nothing that I could tell her anyway. We played various party games and the guests seemed to be slowly starting to enjoy themselves. Then it was time for the gift opening session, and I was pleasantly surprised by everyone's thoughtful gift for my baby. However, my anticipation turned into bewilderment as my mother-in-law handed me a conspicuously large gift box with an exaggerated grin on her face. The room fell silent, and I felt a mixture of embarrassment and frustration.

My mother looked at her angrily. The guests exchanged awkward glances, unsure of how to react to this unexpected turn of events. In an attempt to diffuse the tension and not create any more tension, I mustered a weak smile and thanked her for the thoughtful gift, all the while suppressing the urge to roll my eyes. The situation escalated further when it was time for the cake-cutting ceremony. My mother-in-law had ordered an extravagant teared cake with over-the-top decorations. She made a big show of it, clinking her glass to make everyone look at her. I was starting to get pretty annoyed, wondering what she was up to now.

We all looked at her curiously and waited for her to speak. Barbara then announced that she had come up with the perfect name for our baby girl. I froze hearing her words. Keep in mind that we hadn't even settled on a name ourselves. She proudly declared that the baby would be named after her great-grandmother with a name that seemed straight out of a Victorian novel. I was shocked and a little irritated that she assumed she had the naming rights. I stepped in politely, explaining that my husband and I wanted to pick our baby's name together. It was a choice we wanted to make as parents. However, my mother-in-law

wasn't having any of it. She insisted that she had the perfect name and, if I was a good daughter-in-law, I should accept it since she had spent so much money on the baby shower. I was shocked at her sense of entitlement. I firmly stated that only my husband and I had the right to name our baby, and regardless of who hosted the baby shower, this decision was ours alone. That's when Mill started yelling at me in front of everyone, claiming I was extremely disrespectful and should be grateful for all she'd done. She went on to criticize my upbringing, insisting that I should be thanking her instead of denying her the right to name the baby. Barbara grew increasingly aggressive, pointing her fingers at my face. My mother stepped in, standing in front of me as a shield.

Barbara continued to shout, asserting herself as the actual mommy of my baby since she gave birth to my husband. And it was his sperm that impregnated me. Her words were truly disgusting to hear. Despite my mom's attempt to stop Barbara's nasty comments, she just got angrier. She kept on insulting me and said my mom did a terrible job raising me. It was clear she had too much to drink, and trying to talk sense into her was pointless. The whole situation was getting worse, making everyone uncomfortable. Slowly realizing the escalating situation, I decided I had endured enough humiliation. Trying to salvage some dignity, I decided to walk out with the gifts my friends had generously brought,

leaving behind the present that my mill had got me. However, Barbara, in her intoxicated state, snatched the gifts back from my hand and tossed them to the ground, accusing me of being ungrateful and a witch who was coming between her and her son. The tense atmosphere drew more attention, and I noticed some people starting to film the incident. In an effort to contain the chaos, I asked one of my close friends to politely request people to leave the event. Barbara, undeterred, continued hurling nasty accusations at me, creating a scene that no one could have anticipated when they arrived for what was supposed to be a joyous occasion. Frustration turned to anger, and as

a last resort, I decided to call the cops to remove her from my vicinity as I was starting to feel extremely unsafe with her aggressive behavior. Yep, you read that right. I had to involve the police at my own baby shower because of my toxic mill. When the officers showed up, Barbara went into full drama mode, pointing fingers at me and painting me as the mastermind behind the chaotic event. The cops, thankfully, were understanding and attempted to reason with her. However, being drunk, Mill resisted their efforts and even started yelling at the police, which didn't work in her favor. The situation escalated to the point where she was arrested on the spot. I left the event with my mother and close friends, all of us shaken up by the unsettling incident.

Since this incident, my husband and I have been dealing with the fallout. Mill is on a full-blown guilt trip, playing the victim card and garnering sympathy from some family members who were not present at the baby shower as they don't live in the same city. My husband, although he understands why I called the cops, thinks I took it a bit too far. He believes that I could have called him or his father for help. So Reddit, Ida for calling the cops on my mill for ruining my baby shower and pretending to be the actual mommy of the baby? Update 1, I am overwhelmed with the response I have received since deciding to post about my baby shower. I would like to thank everyone for supporting my decision to call the cops.

I had never witnessed such an aggressive reaction from my mill before, given that I usually only saw her during holidays when I never spent a lot of time with her. The level of aggression she displayed at the baby shower left me genuinely concerned about the possibility of physical harm, especially considering the potential impact on my unborn child. Since the incident, every guest who attended the baby shower has reached out to express their support. Some of them have even shared recordings of the entire debacle, which I intend to show. to my husband. My plan is to have a serious conversation with my husband in the coming weekend about the future with his mother. Update 2, I showed the recording to my husband. As mentioned

earlier, my husband and I found ourselves sitting down for a serious conversation about the events that had transpired. I explained to him in detail how his mother's behavior had escalated throughout the entire ordeal, from the hidden pregnancy revelation to the outrageous baby shower. I described in detail the yelling, accusations, and bizarre gifts she presented. I then shared the recordings with him which my husband watched, visibly horrified. Watching the videos seemed to bring a reality check for him, making him confront the uncomfortable truth about his mother's actions. He started to apologize to me sincerely for underestimating the severity of the situation

and acknowledged that I was right in calling the cops. I had no idea it got this bad. I'm so sorry you had to go through all that, he expressed, his face reflecting both regret and frustration. He admitted that he had never imagined his mother could be this toxic as this seemed so out of character for her. He reassured me that he was on my side and emphasized that my safety and well-being, especially during pregnancy, were his top priorities. We then delved into the underlying issues, discussing how his mother's need for control and validation had overshadowed what should have been a joyous occasion. Gary, grappling with the reality of his mother's actions, shared his own concerns about her behavior and acknowledged that her behavior had crossed a line. I told him that after how his mother had behaved with me in front of everyone, I wanted to cut all ties with her.

I continued to tell him that he could have a relationship with her if he wanted. But me and our child would not be a part of her life at least until his mother went for counseling to deal with her aggressive behavior. Hearing this, Gary expressed that what his mother had done was beyond disgusting and he was willing to cut ties with her as well. I assured him that he did not have to do any such thing but my husband insisted that his mother dared to disrespect me hence she did not have the right to be in our lives anymore. He understood that this behavior by his mother was not just about the baby shower but might have been a culmination of long-standing issues. Moving ahead, Gary has reassured me that he will personally communicate our decision to his mother, making it clear. that cutting her off from our lives is entirely his choice. I have also asked him to warn her that if she decides to show up unexpectedly at our doorstep to force me to

accept her back in our lives, then I will be forced to call the cops on her again. Update 3. It's been a month since my last update. To everyone asking, me and the baby are doing okay. I can't wait to meet my child very soon as the date approaches. Since my last update, we have ceased all communication with Barbara. Gary had a conversation with his parents, and his father assured him that he would take the necessary steps to ensure that my mill understands the boundaries we've set and respects our decision. In the aftermath of cutting ties with Barbara, our lives have experienced a noticeable shift. The absence of constant drama and toxicity has brought about a newfound sense of peace and tranquility in our household.

Gary and I are now able to focus on preparing for the arrival of our baby without the looming cloud of Barbara's disruptions. The support we received from friends and family has been invaluable during this challenging time. My parents and my close friends have been pillars of strength, offering their encouragement and understanding. Even some family members, who were initially unaware of the extent of Barbara's behavior, have come forward to express their support after witnessing the shocking events at the baby shower through the videos that have now gone viral. Our journey is far from over, but this experience has strengthened our bond and highlighted the

importance of facing challenges together as a united front. The decision to sever ties with Barbara was not made lightly, but it has proven to be a necessary step for our well-being. While there may be lingering challenges, we are optimistic about the positive changes this choice has brought into our lives. As we eagerly await the arrival of our little one, we are determined to build a loving and supportive family environment that prioritizes the well-being of both parents and child. I hope you enjoy this story. Best friend's partner made strange remarks and attempted to make physical contact with me while I was visiting. When I informed my best friend, they disclosed that their partner had harbored feelings for me since high school, and they both planned to make something happen.

I am at a loss for how to go about handling this situation in an appropriate manner. Any kind of advice would be greatly appreciated at this point. To make this easier, let's call my friend Kate and her fiancé John. I met Kate during my sophomore year of high school through mutual acquaintances. We became very close so naturally I was devastated when she moved several states away after graduating. Despite the distance, we kept contact and remained as good of friends as ever. About two years ago, my family happened to take a vacation in very close proximity to her new home. So, we excitedly planned to meet.

It felt amazing to see her again we both dashed out of our cars. and hugged and squealed like stereotypical best friends. We hung out all evening and caught up with one another in person. Also, I had the chance to finally meet her fiancé of one year. I had heard only great things about this guy and he seemed very pleasant. Shortly after returning home, I received a text message from an unknown number John. He thanked me for stopping by to see Kate, saying that it really lifted her spirits and he hadn't seen her so happy in a long time. understanding the personal issues Kate had been struggling with lately, I told him I was glad to have helped.

I assumed Kate had given him my number and didn't think much else about it. John would text me here and there about little insignificant things. He'd mention a movie him and Kate were about to see and ask my opinion, or suggest to me a fun new video game they'd bought. I would answer his questions or respond to suggestions, but never carry on a conversation beyond the original topic. John would have a question. attempt to keep me talking, but I always dropped off due in part to me not being very big on texting. More than a year after seeing Kate, I received a very late-night text from John saying I miss you. Assuming he had sent this to me by mistake, I ignored it. I was just forward to a month

or so ago I took a weekend trip to visit Kate. We had been planning this get-together for a while and I was super excited to spend some much-needed girl time with her. I had been anticipating a chill weekend with my best friend, but nothing could have prepared me for the Twilight Zone shit I was about to walk into. Kate and John picked me up from the airport and I was made to feel uncomfortable almost immediately. John had extended his arms for a hug upon my arrival, which I thought nothing of and accepted. He held me a bit too tightly and a bit too long and then commented on how hot I looked. Not nice or even pretty hot. I sort of just laughed awkwardly and looked towards Kate, who seemed to not be paying attention at the moment. I pushed this aside, chalking it up to a social fluke on his

part and enjoyed the rest of my day with him. The daylight hours went smoothly, save for John suggesting several times that we all get drunk that evening. Not being a drinker, I declined only to have him get a little pushy with it. I politely reaffirmed my opinion and he eventually dropped it. After returning to their home, the three of us hung out in the family room and watched a bit of television. We all began talking and somehow came to the topic of a pregnancy scare Kate had told me about a few months prior. John proceeded to tell me how stupid Kate was for way in which she worried over a possible pregnancy. He said that he had told her several times that it was hardly possible and to stop being such a stupid fucking spas over it. He went on to tell me that it was her own fault for

forgetting her birth control and that it was bullshit for her to then expect him to use a condom. I was entirely thrown off at the way he had raised his voice and talked so rudely about my friend. I defended her, saying that it was an entirely legitimate thing to worry over and that if she prefers that he wear a condom in order to be safe that he should respect her wishes. He only laughed at me and Kate stayed totally silent during the entire interaction. John then asked if I wanted to sleep in bed with him and Kate rather than in the guest room, which I found totally strange. I declined the offer and went to bed. The following morning, Kate and I had made plans to go shopping.

She mentioned John wouldn't be with us because he had to work, which I was very grateful for. Before leaving the house, however, John stopped me and said you're a heavy sleeper confused. I gave a weird look and asked what he meant. He went on to say you're a heavy sleeper you don't even wake up when people touch you now normally. I would have interpreted this as someone possibly trying to rouse me earlier by tapping my shoulder or something along those lines. But the way in which John was smirking at me and the inflection and emphasis he had put on the word touch caused me to think otherwise. I asked John what the fuck he was talking about and he only laughed, saying it was nothing. Now, I happened to take some relatively strong sleeping pills which Kate is aware of.

These knock me out pretty hard, but I believe I would have woken up given the chance that someone entered the room or touched me inappropriately. So I highly doubt anything actually happened, but the possibility of him groping me in my sleep makes me sick. Actually, the fact that he would say that to me just because anxiety makes me sick. I went on to try and enjoy my outing with Kate which unfortunately didn't offer much solace. While stopped at a red light, Kate and I sat quietly as a group of pedestrians crossed the street. Kate made a comment on how beautiful one particular girl in the crowd happened to be. I agreed that she was a very pretty woman, only for Kate to suddenly spout out I'm not attracted to men she had said this as if the words had been dying to leave her lips for years. I was pretty dumbfounded and caught off guard by the sudden confession, as I had never entertained the idea of Kate being a lesbian.

She had mentioned once a short fling she shared with a girl in middle school, but claimed it to have been nothing more than a cry for attention. We joked about this here and there, but I never thought she could have been lying. I didn't answer due to lacking a decent response, so she followed up by blatantly telling me that she is a lesbian and that she doesn't love John. I asked Kate why on earth she would marry him then and she only said because I think it's what I should do. I tried to talk to her more about this, but she then told me she would prefer the subject be dropped. At this point, I was counting down the hours to my flight home the next morning and after after hearing John would be joining us for dinner I was even more eager to get away. After meeting up with him, the three of us began walking into the restaurant only for me to catch John's hand veering dangerously close to my butt. I shifted away and he moved very quickly

and attempted to grab it. Luckily I managed to jump to the side, leaving him with only his fingertips brushing my skirt. I told him to watch his fucking hands and he just laughed again and made some kind of comment on my appearance and the fact that he couldn't help it. Dinner couldn't have gone by slower. I sat there hardly saying, a word and wondering if I should just try and get a hotel room for the evening. However, my stupid self decided that I could make it one more night and save the cash. I told Kate that I was very tired the moment we got back to her place, but she insisted that I watch our favorite movie together before I have to go home. Unable to say no, the two of us head up to her room. Her roommate's

bedroom is on the bottom floor next to the family room so the television would have woken them up. About an hour into the movie, John comes in and asks to watch with us. Kate tells him, of course, and hardly ten minutes passes before he's attempting to convince Kate and I to kiss. I say no repeatedly and just keep looking at the screen. Kate isn't saying a damn word about it and John actually starts pleading with us to just kiss really quick so I tell him to shut up and that he's ruining the movie. A couple more minutes of silence pass by until John outright asks if I'd like to sleep with him.

The way that he went about asking was as if he had deluded himself into thinking he was fucking irresistible to me. I told him no and pointed out the fact that Kate was sitting right next to me. I looked at her, expecting some kind of response, but it was obvious that she'd totally spaced out at this point. John informed me that Kate was fine with sharing him. He continued to badger me and insisted that I show him some appreciation for allowing me to stay in his home. I looked at Kate and asked her how the fuck are you over? okay with this? She looked as if she was unable to hear me staring straight ahead with dull eyes. I got up to leave, only for John to attempt to block the door. Mind you, I'm a five-foot-tall

100-pound girl being physically blocked by a very large man. I tell John firmly to move only for him to once again say that I owe him. I took my chances and shouldered my way past him. Luckily, he didn't do much but attempt to grab me as I exited the room. I gathered my things quickly and got the hotel room. Kate never even acknowledged what happened. I think she may be suffering from either John's abuse or some kind of mental disorder which makes me feel bad for being angry with her. But I am, I'm very angry that she sat by and did nothing while her fiancé was so aggressive with me.

Kate is aware that I was sexually assaulted in the recent past and therefore am sensitive to such pushy advances. I talk to Kate very sparsely and she doesn't seem to understand why. By coincidence, I happen to have accepted a role in an internship program close to the city she lives in. Within a month, I will be living in very close proximity to both her and John and I need to figure out what to do. I want to help my friend I'm afraid that she is experiencing abuse, living alive by pretending to be heterosexual, and may possibly be suffering from some kind of mental illness. I have never been in a situation like this and I'm at a complete loss. I don't want to see Kate after I move because that in turn means I'll see John.

Any advice as to how I can help her and try to defuse this situation would be massively helpful. Edit 1, well my gosh I just woke up and I had no expectations of this post blowing up so much. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all of the advice and support. Seriously, you guys have no idea how much it means to me. I've decided to talk to Kate. I'm nervous as hell because I have no clue how she'll react, but I need to reach out to her. She has been there for me during trying times in my life, I want to be there for her. I know for a fact that John works tonight and Kate will accompany him sometimes and just sort of sit there and be idle all evening.

I should have recognized this as weird earlier, but I don't know if she's going tonight. I asked if she'd like to Skype this evening and she responded with why do you want to talk to me? all of a sudden. I told her I'd just like to catch up and apologize for being so busy as of late. Haven't received an answer just yet, but I'll try my best to update tonight if we get the chance to talk. Once again, thank you everyone. I'll try to respond to as many comments as possible. I'm not receiving any good advice from those close to me so this is insanely beneficial. Edit 2, Skyping with Kate tonight. She agreed a lot more excitedly than I had anticipated judging by her preceding texts.

We chatted for just a little bit afterward and oddly she brought up the fact that she had recently watched Rush and commented on how hot Chris Hemsworth is. I was a bit thrown off for obvious reasons, given that she had not only confessed to being lesbian but verbatim told me she's not attracted to men. Maybe I'm reading too far into it so I just agreed that yes, Chris Hemsworth is indeed gifted and told her I couldn't wait to talk tonight. I'm still very nervous. update. So, I received an invitation to Kate and John's wedding today. It reminded me of this whole

thing and more importantly the fact that I never really thanked everyone for all your supportive comments and advice. Thank you very, very much. Plenty of people had been asking for an update, but honestly I became so busy with prepping to move that Reddit was not on my list of priorities. So, on to the update. I went through with the Skype chat as planned. Luckily, I had successfully caught Kate alone. We small talked for hardly a minute because my nerves were buzzing and I wanted to get this over with. I jumped right to it and explained to her why I'd been distancing myself that John's behavior was seriously concerning. I listed to her the exact events that had made me feel uncomfortable both for her safety and mine.

She listened in dead silence as I'm certain this had not been her expectation for our chat. After I'd finished, I asked why she would want to spend her life with this man. especially since she'd confided in me her sexual orientation. Kate broke down pretty quickly and to sum it up she's been in love with me since high school. I can't put into proper words how I feel about this part. Yes, as some of you had suggested, Kate and John had been trying to set up a threesome the entire weekend I was there. I asked her whose idea it had been and she said it was hers, but that John was incredibly excited at the suggestion. She admitted to having planned the entire thing out with John before even inviting me to visit.

She said they planned to see if the intimacy would come naturally and then try and initiate if that were not the case. I asked her why she was okay with John acting so coercive and she said he'd promised to make it happen no matter what after I hadn't caught the hint the past two nights. She said she felt desperate to be with me intimately and would do anything for that to happen. I asked her even if it meant having to force me and she said maybe so, but I would enjoy it eventually, that I would probably have just given in and she could join if John had followed through not going to lie. This made me feel fucking sick, but I set those feelings aside and told her very gently that I don't reciprocate her romantic feelings, but I still care for her as a friend.

I told her that I feared for her safety and happiness and only wanted to help. Well, that completely flipped a switch. Honestly, I've never seen Kate angry. She's a passive person to a fault, but holy shit did she lose it on me. Kate made a total 180 and began making accusations that didn't make sense. That I was trying to steal John away from her and that I can't have him, that his sexual aggression towards me, as well as my past sexual assault, was directly my fault due to how I dress and present myself. That all her insecurities are my fault because she has to put up with John talking about

how I look and asking why she can't act more like me. I enjoy doing my makeup and hair, wearing dresses and heels when I go out, while Kate wears only baggy clothing and does nothing to her hair or face it's always been this way. We just have different styles. Anyhow, she ended her tirade telling me to kill myself so honestly I hung up after that. I feel as though Kate is dealing with issues that are far out of my league to assist with and I couldn't continue speaking to her. My internship is over now, so I'm home and away from both of them. During my internship, they both attempted to contact me multiple times, but I always deleted the messages.

Kate simply ignored what had transpired between us and asked why I wouldn't speak to her then John made a few jokes about kidnapping me. I only saw the both of them once during my entire internship. I had the chance to attend a large pop culture convention and I was seriously so stoked about it despite having no friends to go with. Luckily, I found a couple girls on Facebook through my internship group page who were also looking for people to go with. I knew for a fact Kate and John would be going, as they attend every year. Plus, the costume I chose to wear was near unmissable, so I was certain they would notice me. But honestly, I was not about to let them spoil the event for me and when anyhow.

I gave the girls a rundown of the situation and they all assured me they had my backs. Lo and behold, as I'm standing in an autograph line with my friend who hugs me from behind but John. I basically went into spas mode and flailed until he let go. Dickweed acted confused, Kate was right beside him being quiet. I'd like to say that I told him off like a champ but I didn't. I was scared, honestly, so I just ran. I was wearing massive heels so I had to do that weird crouch move where you're not really running, but more so fast walking like a werewolf.

Couple of the girls followed me to make sure I was good. Never saw them again. I know the general consensus was to not cut Kate out of my life, but I honestly do not believe either of them are safe to be around. I feel that Kate is dealing with something beyond what I can assist with and my personal safety needs to come first. Obviously I'm not going to the wedding. Thank you for all the helpful advice and support I received on my previous post.

Next story, Japanese wife hated our son's black girlfriend for not being good enough. Then she finally admitted she was jealous of her success and had been racist our whole marriage. I 53mm white. My wife of 30 years Naomi is Japanese. We have three kids. This story focuses on my oldest son, Kyle 28. When Kyle first got to college, he began dating a Japanese girl and when he introduced her to my wife, Naomi loved her. They didn't end up working out. But for the past three years, my son has been seeing Danny, a black girl. My son was in medical school across the country and he ended up meeting Danny because they both were volunteers at a soup kitchen.

I remember the first time he sent a picture of her, my wife immediately didn't like her. I'm going to try to phrase this without sounding ignorant myself. But she looks like the urban black girl most think of when African American women. She has the big hoop earrings, the long nails, the long eyelashes. I think she looks stunning, but I've never been in a situation where I was involved in African-American culture. Recently my son moved back to our city for residency and Danny moved with him and started law school. They were staying in an Airbnb, while looking for a place and this week they finally found one. So they invited us over for dinner.

Danny cooked sole food and this stuff was amazing. I complimented her food and my wife gave me the side eye. Naomi then pulled out her phone and asked Danny why does she dress like that and why was she twerking in public? Kyle asked his mom what her problem was, I then took the phone to scroll through Danny's Instagram. And while she did have some videos of her having fun, she also had plenty of pictures of her academic achievements. Before Danny could answer I told my wife Danny is young and having fun. I asked did she see that Danny graduate. come louty or all the times she volunteered.

My wife looked angry that I would bring that up. Naomi then said that she thinks that Danny isn't good enough for our son. Danny then asked why Naomi loved Kyle's ex so much. She didn't graduate with honors. She has many different boys that she posted on social media. Danny then said it's evident the reason Naomi doesn't like her is because of her race. Naomi doubled down and said so what? I've never heard Kyle even disrespect his mother, but he told her to get the fuck out.

Naomi left crying. In the car on the ride home I asked her what was her problem. She asked why didn't I defend her? I said because she was being a racist and a hypocrite and she's acting just like her parents. Her parents didn't like me because I was white. She just said it's different and was just silent on the way home. And when we got to the house, she locked herself in the room and started crying. I can't feel bad for her because if someone disrespected my wife the way she disrespected Danny

I would have absolutely did the same exact thing Kyle did. But I'd have because I was also harsh towards her in this situation. Update, November 17th, 2024. So I want to mention a couple things. First off, I've been around black people. They were never part of my inner circle until Danny came along. So I think it is stupid that twerking has a negative connotation. It's just dancing in the video that my wife found Danny was at a nightclub. She wasn't at church dancing that way.

My daughter, Ari, and her mom are very close. So I asked her to breakfast today and we talked. I just asked her if she knew her mom to be racist. She asked why and I told her about the incident with Danny. Ari told me everything makes sense now. She said it was subtle but when she was in high school, she lost a chess match to a Hispanic boy and Naomi said he must have cheated. But during another round when she lost to a white girl, her mom just said she was really good. She listed a few other incidents,

but it was hard to see Ari come to the realization her mom is not who she thought she was. Ari then explained how this is bad because Kyle told her how he was about to propose soon. I guess Ari talked to her before I could because my wife asked how can I bring the kids into argument. I said this argument is about their brother. Our kids are very close so they were going to find out eventually. I said since she's done crying, does she want to explain what last night is about? She said it's not the serious. I thought how if my son and Danny got married and had kids I wouldn't be involved if I chose to stay with Naomi and that's not a chance I was willing to take.

So I packed my bag and told Naomi if she's not even willing to talk to me, I can't stay in this relationship. She said stop before I left out the door and started crying again. She admitted to having racist tendencies. She also admitted that she's jealous of Danny. She said she was supposed to succeed like her and be smart like her. She said it's not fair. I said it was fair. Growing up my wife was not poor or had it hard by any means.

She had access to tutors, the best schools. I said that's a sad and pathetic excuse. She then said she was losing both of us to Danny. I asked how. She talked about how I complimented Danny's cooking, but don't like Japanese food. I explained how I'm just not a fan of Japanese food, but I was eat it when she makes it. But it can't be about the food because she already had a problem before we got there. I told her I'm leaving. And that until she changes her ways or get help. I'm not coming back. And I'm getting a divorce. if she doesn't apologize to Danny and mean it. I've just been driving around since the conversation

and I'm hurt that the love of my life is not who I thought she was. I hope you enjoy this story. The young girl with autism requested to address me as mother, which brought me great joy, but her birth mother was enraged. Eventually, her elder sibling made contact, expressing a desire to rebuild connections with us both. Us. Okay, so I, 34F. married the man of my dreams last month, 44M, and he has a 16-year-old daughter from his prior marriage. I've been in her life and she's been in mind for four years and I've done my best to be there for her as a friend and trustworthy adult and she's a really, really great kid. I felt closer to her than I did any of my sisters and I could see she looked up to me and trusted me. One more important thing, she's on the autism spectrum.

I swear that's relevant. My husband and I went on our honeymoon for two weeks and then we came back on Friday, and my stepdaughter came up to me and asked if we could talk, and she told me no one had ever been as considerate as I was learning how to make foods in the exact way she liked them or as patient with her poor emotional regulation. Her words, I think she's doing great, and she told me I overall was her favorite person in her life, so she asked if it was okay to call me mom. This really, really caught me off guard and I stopped for a moment to process it, and she got embarrassed. and told me she was sorry and it was stupid, but I told her it wasn't stupid because I would love that. She got super excited and hugged me, and it was lovely. I was telling my husband about it later and it suddenly sunk in that I had become somebody's mom. I just stopped and I told him I'm someone's mom and he asked me if I felt like I was in the delivery room, ah. I laughed at that, but I got so emotionally

overwhelmed I started crying. This morning she came downstairs and said, hey mom to me and it's going to take some getting used to, but holy shit, that was a great feeling. I still don't believe I've earned the titles, but I'll be damned if I'm not going to try my damn best. So it seems last month I got a husband and a daughter too. Pretty good deal if you ask me smile. Comments, bookish tree, op was learning how to make her daughter's food the way she likes. That line jumped out at me. That she thinks the daughter is the bee's knees, even though the daughter feels insecure about her behavior. Imagine the confidence she will feel and how validated the daughter feels. This brings me joy. Boop, the first time I made food for all of us. Within the first month or two I knew her,

I made spaghetti and broke the spaghetti in half, and she said she couldn't eat with it broken in half. Then told me she was very sorry and would make herself a sandwich, but I told her it was okay and I could make another batch, which I did. I found out later on done. down the road she cried after I left because she thought she insulted me and ruined her dad's relationship with her specific food preferences. Sure, it was a little strange at first, but hey, I'm sure we've all asked a waiter or waitress for something very specific at least once in our life's smile my husband's ex-wife was furious my stepdaughter called me mom, March 18th, 2024. So I recently made a post talking about how my stepdaughter asked to call me mom and it made

me really happy. My husband has two children from his previous marriage. a 16-year-old autistic daughter and a 26-year-old daughter. When they divorced, his ex-wife advocated for custody of the older daughter, sounds like it was because she was more independent and less work, and he got the youngest one. As a result, his younger daughter always felt kind of unloved by her mom and doesn't go too far out of her way to talk to her. So the older daughter finally got a job in her field that she's been fighting for a few years

and she wanted to have a dinner with the family. She seems like a nice girl from the times I've interacted with her, but her mom seems passive, aggressive, and unkind. We all got to the restaurant and sat down and it was pretty nice and civil. I was sitting next to my step, daughter and she was a little overwhelmed because she hadn't been to the restaurant before and didn't know what to order, so we were looking at the menu and I pointed out a type of pasta that looks similar to something we make at home that she likes. She said, thanks mom, I guess she said it loud enough that her biological mom had. heard because she literally stopped everything and asked what did you just say? My husband and I tried to defuse the situation, but she was very agitated by it, and actually asked why she did it. Their older daughter stepped in and asked if she could tell her mom about her new job,

and that got her to move on finally. My step daughter didn't say much for the rest of the evening, but on the way home she tried to apologize for ruining the evening to which we told her she didn't. Then, if this wasn't bad enough, both she and my husband received a four-paragraph long message talking about how disrespectful and egregious it was that she called another woman mom and how she was very disturbed by it. My husband is just in disbelief and feels horrible for our daughter. He went to talk to her and she didn't say much, but she clearly thinks this is all her fault. If anything, it's my fault for not discussing how she should refer to me at the dinner with my husband and then discussing it with her beforehand. I just fucking hate that this woman is upsetting

her so much and I see why my husband divorced her. Thank you for reading. Comments, Remarkable underscore by our 4625. Info, does the ex spend time with her autistic daughter at all? If not, I'm not sure why she'd be surprised. Up, she sees her on holidays and family gatherings, that's really it. Apparently her mother is entitled to that research. just for existing. 101,010 trees. I know it's not the same but I was called mom at work. L.O.L.

I don't have children but apparently I exude mothership. Hopefully not in a bad way. The ex-wife is a real piece of work. It's nice that you took on taking care of special needs child. It is no small feat and you are deserving of the title of mom. Op, definitely. I have no sympathy for a woman who did demands to be called mom while putting in no effort to be mom, or a man who demands to be called dad,

also I just want to say, yes, she technically is a special needs child but she's very capable. She has been looking to apply for an after-school job and has started thinking about college, and while she does struggle with emotional regulation and has very specific preferences for things, she's no different from the rest of us smile adventurous travel one, that poor girl. If her mom acted like a mom, then it wouldn't have happened. Her actions or lack of consequences. I'm not sure if she has a therapist, but it might help explain things in a way she gets and from a professional. The biggest thing I would be worried about now if her mom keeps sending things to her or making her feel guilty about more things.

Up, she does have a therapist who she meets with weekly. I'm sure my husband's ex-wife is going to come up tomorrow. Emma Azal Mok Info, how long since the bio mother gave away her sick. 16 years old daughter's custody. How much time does she spend parenting her? How have they bonded? She would have some nerve to be angry that a child she is not parenting as much as you calls you mom.

You seem to be a very sweet parent to her. Keep it up up, since elementary school, on holidays and family gatherings, by awkwardly asking how they've been doing since last Thanksgiving. My husband got custody of the young autistic child and learned how to make foods exactly the way she needed them to be, learned how to speak her language, as he calls it, and sit and single-handedly raise a still-developing child. Then his ex-wife got custody of the high schooler who could be left alone at home and make her own food so she could work and do her own thing without having to worry about anyone or anything. Update, last week I made a post about how my husband and my autistic

16-year-old stepdaughter went to dinner with his ex-wife and their oldest daughter, 26, to celebrate her getting a job she's been chasing her whole adult life. Then my stepdaughter called me mom at one point and ex-wife got pissed and stopped the whole table to make a point, and the rest of the evening wasn't great and then when we got home, both my husband and stepdaughter got a big text message from her talking about how disrespectful that was. So the day after the incident, my stepdaughter came over to me and told me her older sister texted her and asked if she could read the text out loud. I just nodded and said definitely but on the inside my eyes rolled to the back of my head like Jesus Christ, here we go. However, her sister sent her a very, very lovely and thoughtful message saying she felt bad about what happened the night before and was sorry the two of them haven't been talking much lately and asked if she wanted to try to be sisters again.

Then she said she asked her what movies she's seen lately, and movies is her special interest so that meant a lot she asked. Not gonna lie, I was caught off guard by her sincerity and kindness. It was very sweet. Then later that day, I got a text message from her older sister, whom I assume got my number from younger stepdaughter, and said she wanted to get to know me better since I am legally her stepmom now and I'm the woman her baby sister is calling mom, so she definitely wanted to try to get to know each other. She also mentioned that she didn't get to celebrate her sister's 16th birthday with her and felt that was a really big deal and asked if the three of you could get dinner and see a movie. Tonight the three of us went out and saw a movie and got dinner

by ourselves. My younger stepdaughter picked the movie and she loved it but my older stepdaughter and I didn't get it but all that matters is that she liked it. Then we sat down and had dinner together and had a very nice time. Then on the way out, my younger stepdaughter asked if she could run into the store next to the restaurant to buy something really quick, in and out, so we said all right. While she was in the store, my older stepdaughter told me she wanted me to know she misjudged me and watching the two of us interact both at the dinner the other night and tonight. Me going through the menu with her to find something she likes, me advocating for her when their mother got upset, and how she clearly feels comfortable talking around her, and that

she completely understands why I'm now mom to her. All in all a pretty great night. After I got home I saw she sent me a text-related something we talked about, so looks like we're going to be talking now. Still got some stuff to work out with her biological mom, but we'll take this as a victory anyway, yeah. I just figured I'd share something positive since there's a lot of negativity on Reddit and with my current situation, so I figured I'd share a positive update smile comments. Lynn though, ah, I read the last post when it happened. I'm so happy about this development. I'm so happy your daughter is being supported by her older sister, and your family feels like it grew a bit more.

Congrats and thanks for the wholesome update. Op, yeah, it made me really happy to hear they were talking again. I left this out in the post, but I remember a few months ago my younger stepdaughter was trying to tell her sister about a movie she saw that meant a lot to her and her older sister was being very sarcastic and snarky about it to get her goat, and she actually started crying. So I think it's great they're getting along. Thel injured bear, this is such a sweet story. my mom kind of dropped me off to my dad and stepmom when I was 12 to run off with a guy to Spain.

My stepmom has been in my life since I was four, and I remember both of us trying not to cry when I approached her about calling her mom. Shout out to all the stepmoms out there going out of their way to make the kids feel loved. It helps more than you know less than three Tink has an attitude. My dad is my mom's second husband and our stepdad. They divorced when my sister and I were in college. but we decided that our dad will always be our dad. He met us when we were six and four years old and we've lived with him since we were eight and six. We've had our dad in our lives longer than our bio father has been in active contact with us.

We got the short end of the stick, unfortunately, with our bio parents as they both have significant mental illness and like to use us as pawns in their weird hateful games. But our dad chose to show up for us every day and loves us with no strings attached. Sometimes the universe gifts us with very special people. It's good to acknowledge them with the titles they have earned like mom and dad. Smile. Now on to the next story. Story 2.

Joked about my long-distance G.F. Secret husband, but she asked how long I'd known. Turns out she was married with a kid the whole time. So I helped her husband get divorced. I met my girlfriend on a dating app four years ago. Before we were together, I would swipe through apps like Tinder all the time mostly just to try and find someone for my phone. I would talk to someone now and then, but it never really panned out to be much. As soon as I saw my girlfriend's profile, I thought she was stunning. Her bio caught my attention too. I knew right away that I wanted to talk to her. So, I swiped right and we matched.

I took my shot and I messaged her, partially not even expecting her to respond. To my surprise, she messaged me back less than an hour later and both of us really jelled during our first conversations. I was getting my hopes up a little, she was a beautiful girl and we seemed to get along. After chatting for a little while, she told me that she was only in town for a week on business. I was bummed because I thought she was really awesome and it sucked to hear that nothing would really come of our relationship. She told me that she wanted to meet me while she was there, so we got together at her hotel room and we hooked up. It was just as amazing as I thought it would

be, so I gave her my number and told her that we should keep in touch. I didn't think at the time that we would be starting a long-distance relationship, but after she left that's what it blossomed into. Even though we didn't get to see each other often, I was extremely happy knowing that she was my girlfriend. She had a very rigorous work schedule and our time off never seemed to coincide admittedly. I was somewhat blinded by my attraction to her so there were a lot of things that I overlooked in the beginning of our relationship. For example, the first time that I ever visited her house I noticed some weird things inside. There were two toothbrushes in the bathroom, which was a little strange considering she lived by herself. On top of that, there was a more

masculine scented shaving cream under the sink as well. I asked, her about the toothbrush and she just told me that it was an old one that she hadn't thrown away. I believed her, I didn't really have any reason to think much else about it. I spent the rest of the weekend with her and ended up going back home, happier than ever. I genuinely liked her and I wanted to move in with her because I saw a future with us. Every time I would broach the subject, she would tell me that it was too soon in our relationship. The first time I asked it had been about a year. the second time we'd been together for three years.

Personally, three years is not a short amount of time for me. It felt like it was the next step in our relationship to live together. We had been long distance that entire time because I was waiting to move in with her. I ended up just deciding to move closer to her regardless. If we couldn't live together, we could at least live in the same city. When I told her that I was moving, she acted like it was some surprise and told me that I shouldn't have done something like that for her. Her reaction kind of shocked me, I assumed she would be happy to have me closer to her. Even though I was living so close to her, I still only saw her occasionally.

I understood that she was busy, but at the same time, I didn't quite get why we couldn't spend nights together at each other's apartments. After a few months of being closer, it started to click with me that something else might have been going on. I had read crazy outlandish stories about people who lived double lives and carried on affairs, having families in different states, etc. I didn't want to believe that could be what was happening there, but my mind started to do its own thing. I learned the truth all because of a dumb joke that I made. My girlfriend and I were out to dinner and we were having a good time. I asked her if she wanted to go back to her house after we finished eating and she said no. Then I made a joke commenting on how she didn't want me to be there because of her husband and children.

She got really silent for a moment and put her food down like she couldn't believe what I'd said. Then she said, how long have you known? I laughed for a moment, thinking she was making some deadpan joke back at me. After a couple of moments, I realized she was being serious. I asked for some clarity and she explained everything. She wasn't happy to do it, but I was glad everything was finally in the open. She told me that she did in fact have a husband and a son. She didn't get along with her mother-in-law, so whenever her husband wanted to take their son to see her, she would reach out to me.

That was the opportunity she had to be with me. Everything made sense when she told me. That's why she didn't want me to move to her city, much less move in with her. It was why she was only sporadically available to see me. Right away, I told her that I wasn't okay with what she was doing and I told her that I was done with her. I also insinuated that I was going to tell her husband about everything. She wished me luck with that and we both left the restaurant. When I got back to my house to try and look into her life to find out who her husband was,

I realized she gave me a fake name. The entire time I was with her she was pretending to be somebody that she wasn't. She carried on a full affair, using a fake name and everything and I never noticed. I eventually gave up trying to figure out who she really was. I hadn't even thought about it for a few months. My friend back home messaged me out of the blue one day with a screenshot of a Tinder profile. It was my ex-girlfriend. There was a different name associated with the account and the age was different than what I knew her to be as well.

The pictures and bio were exactly the same. My friend recognized her from pictures that I had shown him and asked me if we were still together or if we'd broken up. He thought that she might have been trying to cheat on me so he'd. wanted to make sure everything was good. I called him right away and explained everything to him. He was a shock to find out about it as I was. After that, we came up with a little bit of a plan to try and catch her. He ended up matching with her and they started talking. It's kind of funny, but I ended up telling him a lot of the things to say that I knew would work on her. She pulled the same thing that she had with me, telling him that she was only in town for a certain

amount of time and asked to meet up with him. All I needed my friend to do was send me the screenshots from her Tinder profile and possibly get a good look at her ID when she wasn't looking. The last part was going to be pretty difficult. I waited patiently for any news about what was happening. About two hours into the date that they were supposed to have, my friend texted me with a photo of her ID. I know there is a huge privacy concern, but I wasn't going to do anything with it other than look up her husband. I had her name, her real address, and all the information I needed to find her. I searched for her online, and lo and behold found out that she had a real estate business with her husband. They were prominent members of their community. Both of them even served as chairs

in the Homeowners Association. She had a lot to lose and I was about to take it all from her. I knew I had a couple of days before she would be coming back to the city, so I reached out to her husband as quickly as I could to try and meet up with him. I didn't know what to say, so I sent him a message with all of the information. It was kind of unbelievable, and I didn't really even expect him to listen to everything I had to say. Thankfully, I had some evidence that I could attach in the form of our text message exchanges as well as the Tinder profile and some pictures she and I had swapped over the years. It took a few hours, but he eventually responded and agreed to meet up with me. We met at a coffee shop the following morning and he looked like he wanted to tear my head off of my body.

I swore to him that I knew nothing about him or his family. I think after a few minutes he believed me. He even confessed that there were some signs that she was having an affair that he overlooked for the sake of his own family. Given the extent of how far she went, I think she proved herself to be completely untrustworthy. That was probably what really opened his eyes. I told him that he deserved better than her, she was clearly a monster for what she'd done. I could hardly wrap my mind around how selfish her actions were. I gave him everything I could to help him if he decided he wanted to pursue a divorce.

I even told him that if he needed someone to talk to about it without judging him I was there. Surprisingly, he actually took me up on that offer and we chatted about it quite a bit while he was going through his divorce. Over everything they went through, it was clear that I was clear that. I wasn't even the first guy she had an affair with. It was some way for her to escape the responsibilities of motherhood and her business without consequence at the time. Unfortunately for her, it all backfired. After their divorce, their joint business went under. However, the husband was able to continue representing a lot of people from their neighborhood. Everybody knew what happened and she was ostracized from most of the community. She ended up moving into a one-bedroom apartment

and has an enter-level position at another firm in a different county. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse and I set aside funds for a long time to acquire my grandparents' former residents. During the family gathering, my sibling unexpectedly asserted that I had committed to allowing her to reside there. Oh my! 27F, wife, 30F, and I recently closed on our dream house and it has the family torn. Years ago my grandparents owned the family home, but when they died unexpectedly with a lot of medical debt and expenses our family had to sell their house.

It was heartbreaking and sad and I decided as a small child that one day I would buy the house back. I shared those dreams with my sister. I met my wife when I was 18 and she was 21. Her parents owned a small rental that they allowed her to live and rent-free, just paying for the expenses. She invited me to live with her a year and into our relationship and we got married a year after that. I told her about my dreams of owning my grandparents' house and she fully supported me. We began putting large amounts of money back for a

down payment in the hopes that the house wouldn't go on the market before we could afford it. Because we didn't pay rent and both had good jobs for our ages in the economy we lived and we were able to put back a very, very large sum of money. My in-laws also offered us a sum of $75,000 for the down payment and in total we put back about $185,000. About 20 years after my grandparents passed away their house finally went back on the market at a massive price. The house itself is huge with six bedrooms, a large lakefront estate, and several features including a pool and small guest house. We knew that this house would have a huge price tag and we skimped and budgeted for nine years to afford my dream house. My sister was also house shopping at this time but with a much

smaller budget. Her and her husband have children, student debt, and rented for the past several years and were not able to put back money in the same way my wife and I were. When our grandparents' house went on the market, I sent the link to my sister and said that we were finally getting our grandparents home back in the family. She was very excited and said as much and that was that. My wife and I moved forward, visiting with the owners and real estate agents, having it inspected, and made an offer. They accepted and we were out. absolutely over the moon. Throughout this whole process my sister kept saying how excited she was to have the house back in the family and how nice it will be for her children to know this house

and grow up in it like her and I did. Our grandparents' house was the location of every birthday, holiday, gathering, and reunion. And my wife and I planned on making it that way again. Which was why what my sister said didn't raise any red flags. Weird that she'd phrase it that way but not concerning. We had a barbecue at my parents' house to celebrate the final closing of our house. During the dinner my mill offered to kennel our dogs while we were in the stages of moving to keep things easier and them safe and that was when my sister piped up. She asked why our dogs needed to be watched when the real issue was her kids. My wife asked what she meant and she said that her kids will need more supervision than our dogs and that she was confused as to why we'd be

so busy that our dogs needed watching. I told her I was the one confused. I didn't know she was helping us move and that if her kids couldn't reliably be left to their own devices, then she absolutely did not need to help us pack. My sister proceeded to ask why my wife and I would be packing. I told her the obvious, we just closed in a house. For length reasons I'll leave out a lot of the back and forth, but here's the gist of it. My sister had it in her head that we were buying the house to either a, rent to own it out to her family or be, transfer the title to her name and have her pay us back in time. Yes, that is literally what she was thinking. Despite us never discussing anything like that once. When I told her that was not happening my sister through a fit,

she was pissed because this was her dream too. And that it wasn't fair that only one of us could live it. That since she had children they deserved to grow up in the family home and what did my wife and I even need all that space for. My wife told her that it isn't the family home anymore. It wasn't left in a will, we purchased it and now it is our home. And we decide what we will do with it. My sister told my wife to shut up and that she had no say in this family discussion. I informed my sister that if she spoke to my wife that way again we would not be having any kind of contact with her anymore. That she doesn't get to assume we're giving her a house and then throw a hissy fit when she's put in her place. And we left. My in-laws spoke to us on the matter

a few times, but all told us we were in the right and that my sister was very out of line. I assumed everyone would agree, but if they did I wouldn't be on this thread. I got texts and voicemails from my parents saying that we were out of line threatening my sister. They told me they were disappointed in me for taking my sister's dream from her and that I don't have kids so I can't understand or want to provide them with a good home and childhood like she had. That it's only fair we set up a way to give her the house and that we could afford to find something else. Even my more distant relatives have said that it was cruel of us to take that from her. I'm honestly super shocked and taken aback. Entitled people thinking they should get their relatives' houses,

but I never expected to live it. This feels surreal and I hate that we're starting this new chapter out on such a sour note. Edit. While this blew up in such a short amount of time, thank you for your support and if this continues to be interesting and not blow over, I'll definitely update. Yes, this unfortunately is a real situation. And in case anyone is curious. Yes, the house is big and expensive, but it's severely outdated. Which is why the size and features don't exactly match the price in today's housing market. Like I don't think any owners after my grandparents renovated a single thing. Also, I am a woman, LOLL. Update 1, I can't read and respond to all of these comments but, thank you. I will continue to update but since posting yesterday morning not much had happened.

I will add a bit more of what's happened since the barbecue. I haven't responded to any messages my family have left. I honestly didn't think this was that big a deal but after scrolling through the comments for a while with my wife were both taking this much more seriously. A security system isn't an option at this moment. The house needs too much work at this moment to have cameras and such set up. They'd be in the way if everything else being done, we'd have to have them remove for several of the things we need done, and we don't even have internet access at the property at this moment. I will be scheduling meetings with some companies to start coming out and working on the property before we get to the cosmetics. However, we do have someone coming out

to change the locks on Thursday. We won't be moving into the house for a bit since it needs so much work before we're comfortable. I've had a few people suggest the story is fake because the price of the house doesn't match the features. The house needs a lot of work. It hasn't been updated or worked on in years and the price reflects that. Also, we are lucky to live in a state where property values haven't skyrocketed too bad. Comments. Lurker 78, info, how much did the house cost if you put down almost $200,000 as a down payment? NTA, but your first mistake was sharing the listing with your sister. OOP, the house was a little over $800,000, but down payment itself was only about $100,000. The rest was used for closing costs, moving costs, and renovations slash updates. It had a seriously

dangerous deck that looked like it had been done by the homeowners that needs completely torn down and redone. OOP responds on getting a will in place regarding the house in case if she and her wife passes on. That way her family cannot fight over the legal rights of the property. OOP, honestly I never even thought of this. I've always assumed wills and trusts were enough, but this is a scary possibility. Thank you and I will be strongly considering this. Update 2, July 30th, 2024. Thank you to everyone for being so supportive and offering advice. To those who suggested getting a security system in place, we are going to do that, but the house is not in a place where a security system can be installed. For the time being we're looking into getting some battery power trail cameras as suggested by one Redditor,

I can't find your comment in the sea anymore, but you know who you are, we don't have to worry about internet access and they won't be in the way of renovations. We are restoring the house back to its original glory, pre-carpeted bathrooms and mismatched wallpaper. Besides fixing broken shit and upgrading old appliances will be having the floors redone, paint, wallpaper, new windows, and opening up some walls that shouldn't be there. For the next two weeks my wife and I will be meeting with people coming out to work on electricity, plumbing, and a few other things and we do have a consultation with a home security company. along with cameras we're looking to get alarms and door codes and set up an access gate around the property. One of those that needs either a passcode or to be led in by someone in the house.

We've already made an appointment to have the locks changed and aren't concerned about my family trying to squat there. My in-laws have allowed us to park their camper trailer on the property while work is being done not only for peace of mind, but to avoid commuting back and forth multiple times daily. For the actual update. I was hesitant to post this update since it's so soon after my original post, but I guess enough has happened for it to be useful information. The events of the barbecue took place last week, but I only got around to writing it all out yesterday. I sent a message to my parents and siblings yesterday evening asking to meet up to talk things through and try and figure out what's wrong and what exactly the hell is happening. Earlier today my wife and I met my parents and my brother's family at his house before my sister arrived.

I let them know that if they tried to interrupt or control the conversation we would leave. I told them that I never once even suggested my sister would be allowed to rent out the house or buy it from us. That you didn't know where she got the idea from, and showed them the text strings where I first sent her the listing in every conversation where I updated her on the progress. My mom asked to see the rest of the conversations about the house and I told her there were none. She informed me that my sister told them all that we had made an agreement that my wife and my wife and and I would purchase it and then rent it out to my wife's family until they'd paid enough to buy it. That we would live in the guest house and they'd get the main house. She told them that we had went back on our deal and had absolutely shattered her dreams of raising

her kids in the house she grew up in. We gave our side and it wasn't difficult at all to convince my parents that we were telling the truth. With the lack of evidence on my sister's part and absolutely no legal documentation my parents didn't even attempt to try and back up what she told them. My parents were very apologetic and let us know that they never would have said those things to us had they known the truth and that they supported us 100%. My brother was supportive of us as well, but he was never one of the people harassing us over this so his reaction is less important. Around then my sister and her husband showed up. My bill is a doormat and will give my sister whatever she wants so I wasn't expecting much from him. I asked her to produce any of the necessary evidence to prove that I told her we'd rent the house out to her.

That her lie was ill-conceived and that she better have a good explanation. She attempted to suggest that I had deleted the conversation but when she couldn't produce said messages either her story fell apart. She started crying, saying it wasn't fair that we got everything handed to us and that we didn't need a house this big and that we were rubbing our wealth in her face. So to my understanding she thought she could trick everyone into bullying us into renting our house out to her? I guess? Like some kind of fucked in the head Scooby-Doo villain?

Instead of using ghosts to scare us away, she's using a fake rental agreement that she didn't even attempt to make look or sound legit. We let her know that she had a lot of apologizing to do before we'd consider having a relationship with her moving forward and that she wouldn't be welcome in our home for a long time. At the moment our relationship with my parents is rocky at best, for obvious reasons. They let us know that they're here to support us if we need moving assistance or help with renovations, but it'll take some good hard thinking to decide if we're okay with that. We will not be giving anyone in my family a spare key, but my wife's parents will receive one for emergencies. The house won't be in a state to host guests for a bit, so we are choosing to cross the can my family be trusted at our home bridge when we come to it? To answer some common questions I've noticed in the comments. My sister obviously has some screws loose, but my parents don't really coddle her.

She's what you can consider the golden child and the baby, but honestly most of her antics up until this point were just one-upping a cheque. during our childhood or seeking more attention from our parents. She's dramatic, entitled, and a little selfish, but has never displayed this level of crazy before. Yes, we will get a security system but not for a bit. No, my family will not be trusted with a key. Yes, I am a woman. I know it's crazy how can two women be married, L.O.L. My wife and I do not have kids and will not have them in the future.

My sister has done some odd things but nothing is absolutely absurd as this. We will be meeting with an estate planner to put everything into writing. We plan on leaving the property to my sill and her kids with my mill as the executor of our estate for the time being. My sister and her family rent a small house in town. They aren't struggling per se. They each are college educated with good jobs but children are expensive and then adding in student debt and $2,000 a month in rent and you aren't exactly living. it up. Also, there's a surprising amount of people mad at my wife and I for being rich. We are not wealthy. My in-laws are comfortable and are generous enough to allow us to occupy their rental at no

charge. They bought a new house decades ago and just didn't sell their previous one. So they allowed my wife to live there. The down payment was my wife's college fund from years ago. Her parents put money in it, but when she decided to go into a trade they kept the money and saved it specifically for the purpose of a down payment. When we told them that the house was up for sale finally they offered the college fund they had kept for her. We worked good paying jobs but were able to save so much because we didn't have to pay $2,000 a month for housing. We did skimp and save and we did damn well earn it. We lived below our means and spent years forgoing any kind of luxuries to afford something we wanted. So yeah, not as drama-filled as a lot of people were

expecting or hoping. I don't see this as the end of it, not at all, but for the time being my wife and I are focusing on dealing with our new house and not my sister. She's blocked on both our phones as of this morning and I'm not sure when I plan on unblocking her. Comments. True underscore True underscore 1593. Leaving it to your sill is mad work. You're closer to your sill than your sister? Oop, the sister who attempted to trick, bully, and harass her way into taking the house we just bought and turned my entire family against us? And my sill is my wife's sister. So yes, she's just as close to us as my sister.

Closer after the stunt my sister just pulled. Ladder Silabub 5560. And I would have gotten away with the house if not for those meddling lesbians. Oop, okay, this one got me. Every day. GAL. NTA. Your sister is delusional and has made up a narrative in her head that she is owed or entitled to certain privileges.

Your parents are crazy for reinforcing that narrative to her. Good on you for taking your wife's side and not standing for the disrespect. Live at underscore Western 71.33. NTA. Do not ever give your parents or sister a spare key or the door code. Ever. Now on to the next story. Story two.

Ex's new wife asked my daughter to call her mom. When I talked to my daughter, I found out a heartbreaking secret that changed everything. I, 27F, and my ex, 26, we have a six-year-old daughter together. Things weren't working for us, so we broke up last year and decided to co-parent. We both have custody. He got married few months back. I don't have any hard feelings or anything for him or his wife. He is a great father, but his wife she's going around saying not only she became a wife,

but she got a bonus daughter too. Last week my daughter was with her father and I saw his WhatsApp status. A video, she was asking my daughter to call her mom and saying how she just looks like her, how people think she is her birth mother, without second thought I called my daughter's father. I was mad I had a fight with him and asked him to drop my daughter back to me and I don't regret it, but everyone is saying I'm overreacting. Okay, maybe I'm but I can't see my daughter calling someone else her mom. Edit 1. She and my daughter doesn't look alike.

She was asking my daughter to call her mom when my child wasn't comfortable. I don't hate her and I don't wish my child to hate her too. I wish them to have a friendly relation where they can trust each other and be comfortable in each other's presence. Edit 2. Thank you everyone for your response. It means a lot genuinely. I appreciate it. I had a talk with my daughter. Once I have a talk with my daughter's father, I will update you guys. comments mean nits bonus daughter is fine

asking her to call her mom isn't help your daughter find a couple unique nicknames for her stop mother that no one else uses barely awake twenty twenty three she's insane if she thinks that's even remotely appropriate i have a stepson and couldn't even imagine asking him to call me mom especially when his mom is you know a wonderful and involved mom My husband wouldn't stand for it either because we all have a good relationship and even though they didn't work out he still has respect for her as his son's mother.

Update, August 13, 2024. I made a post recently about how my ex's new wife asked my daughter to call her mom. First of all, I'm genuinely thankful to you guys. I thought I was Jew overreacting and was going to leave the matter without doing anything. I had a talk with my six years old and I'm shaking RNIPK my daughter thought I was going to to abandon her, can you believe? I was dumbstruck I felt like I have lost everything in my life. My lovely daughter light of my life she thinks I'm going to leave her. I asked her why she thinks like that, but she was adamant on not telling me after luring her I came to know her

stepmother told her that when I will get a new husband I will leave her and make a new family. That woman she even said it's only her father who will be with her till end. Is she insane? I told my daughter that I don't have any plans of getting married again and even if there's something like that I would never leave her, she gonna always be my daughter. Truthfully speaking, my daughter still is hesitant. She still thinks I will leave her. I've taken a week off me and D. My daughter we are spending it together with my parents. After the little vacation I'm getting a counselor for her. I had a talk with my lawyer. He said we got evidence and everything he can help me get full custody of my child. I've no intention of dragging my ex to court

again, but if there's another incident like this, I won't hesitate. After this I had a talk my ex alone I told him everything about how our daughter feels, how his wife doesn't know her boundaries, how he would feel if I asked my daughter to call a random man dad. He said he had no idea things would turn like this. He only left them alone with the purpose to bond, I feeling he's lying. I told him clearly that I won't let that women anywhere near my daughter and if he is against it we can just go to court. For now we have decided that he can meet our daughter at his parents' house and after some time if my daughter agrees he can take my daughter to his home it's his responsibility to not to let my kid alone with that woman.

I had a talk with that women too. She just started crying putting all blame on me saying I'm jealous of her having my husband. Why would I be jealous of someone having my ex? I don't have any energy to waste on her petty dramas. About that women I'd cry she's doing all this. I gave it a lot of thought and only came up with this. Apparently my ex-in-laws are against this wedding so maybe she wants to get in their good side through my daughter or she's crazy.

I just want to make things right for my daughter. I even came to know that my child thinks she's the reason for our divorce and many of you guys said he X got married within year maybe he was cheating. Yes, he was cheating. I came to know about it recently and truthfully speaking I don't even want to confront him for this. I just want to leave him peacefully without much drama in life. Maybe someday I will ask him get the answers I'm looking for but are in. I just want to focus on myself and my daughter. Again, I am really thankful to you guys. I never thought my daughter would think something like this. If it wasn't you guys I'd if I would. If I wasn't you guys I'd if I would. have ever came to know. Come nuts. Jeepers. Creeper 74. You're not overreacting, you did everything right. Talk to your daughter, talk to your lawyer, spending time with your daughter, setting up therapy,

talking to your ex and working out a plan that protects your daughter against further alienation through her stepmom. Your ex sounds like a jerk in general, but at least he's willing to work with you, for now. If his parents are against his new marriage, you might want to make a child. you might want to make sure ex-mill also knows about the situation and the deal you struck with your ex. The only thing I think you could have done better is drive your ex to a vasectomy appointment. Because act two of this drama is going to occur when this woman has a child of her own with your ex and turns on your daughter. Boop.

I had a talk with his parents they said they don't care about this guy anymore and they only agreed to let him enter their house because he's going to meet their granddaughter there. Moreover regarding vasectomy ha ha ha I don't think I can force him but I hope they can take responsibility if they have one. I hope you enjoy this story. Allow my late spouse's guardians to visit my child as a gesture of goodwill, but they are now attempting to take custody, alleging in legal proceedings that I am an inadequate parent because I got a new boyfriend. I, 30F, am the single mother of Clara, 2F. My pregnancy wasn't planned, I had a no-strings-attached relationship. with her father, Jack, 30s M, for seven months when I became pregnant unexpectedly.

He lived in another state, but would visit my city monthly for business reasons and we hit it off after meeting in a bar. We thought about our options regarding the pregnancy, but I decided to keep the baby. Jack wanted to be part of her life, so we planned to raise the baby together but not as a couple, just co-parents. Unfortunately, Jack's passed away during my pregnancy. Jack's parents, Linda and James, knew that I was pregnant when he passed. We already had done a prenatal paternity test at the time. We were all devastated by his passing, but off course his parents were destroyed by it. Clara is their first and only grandkid and she became their beacon of light in a dark time, as they say.

They have other two daughters, Ruth, 37F, and Lily, 27F, but they don't have children. Ruth is trying to conceive for a long time with her husband and Lily is child-free and single. Jack's whole family lives in another state, with the exception of Lily, that lives abroad. They have a family business so their life is there, while I have my family and career in my current city, where I live with Clara. Since Clara was born we have an agreement, nothing legal, but we all agreed with visitations for her grandparents and aunts. They usually visit Clara twice a month, James and Linda, are the ones that visit the most, but Ruth also shows up sometimes.

I really appreciate their presence on her life. Since the beginning, a point of content on our relationship was traveling with Clara to their state. They have a big property that's in their family for over 100 years and have a family business too. In their small town they are treated as almost royalty and wanted Clara to experience that. I understand that it's good for my daughter to know her heritage, but I always put my foot down on the idea of their traveling with her without me. I already visited their hometown three times with Clara since she was born, but this isn't enough apparently. Our relationship wasn't perfect. I had some issues with Linda meddling way too much on my parenting, but we were civil until I started my current

relationship. I'd been dating Ted, 34M, for almost a year and things are tense with James and Linda. Ted and I don't live together and he has a daughter, Marie 4F, that lives with him. Linda has a Linda has expressed disapproval to his constant presence in my house, which is not true. Both of us work a lot and between our kids and other priorities we probably see each other three to four times a week, to Marie having played dates and sleepovers with Clara and the list go on. The woman will find a way to comment something even about Ted's car parked in front of my house. Things escalated when two weeks ago I emailed Linda, James, and Ruth an invite for Christmas Eve. Ted and I will have a get-together with our families and close friends.

I decided to invite Clara's grandparents so they can expend Christmas Eve with her, but I also let them know that if they prefer they can take her for lunch on Christmas Day. The next day Linda texted me that they already had plans to take Clara to their home on Christmas. I said that this was not happening. I didn't hear anything from her for about two days. Linda called me stating that she gave me two days to cool off and be reasonable. I asked what she meant, and she said they have rights over Clara and they had waited too much to take her home for Christmas. Now she is bigger and can travel without me.

I said that this was never discussed and I will not let them travel with my daughter without even discussing with me before. Linda said this was the discussion before the travel. I laughed on the call and said she was delusional. Things escalated quickly after that. I was accused of trying to replace Jack on Clara's life. I also said some things that were a little cruel about Jack never even meeting Clara. After Linda hung up on me, James called and tried to reason with me. He let it slip that they bought Clara's plane tickets two months ago without asking me first. I said there's no way I would let them walk all over me. James lost his temper and demand that I should apologize to Linda or we will go to court over this.

I didn't back down and said they were choosing to fight over this, not me. Well, after some time of silence from them I was served with court papers, they are suing me over custody of Clara and are stating I am unfit as a mother. I already have a lawyer who I consult before our fight over the phone, she told me yesterday they have almost zero chance of getting any custody. The most they can get is visitation, but still I am worry about this becoming a legal battle. People on my life are divided. Part of them think I did nothing wrong by putting up boundaries and others think it's petty of me to start a fight with my daughter's grandparents when I could let them travel with her for Christmas when I know they are good grandparents and will take care of her.

Ada Some clarifications are needed. 1. How Linda and James know details about my life. How they know about Ted's car and Marie's play dates. They do live in another state, but they visit often. At least twice a month they come to see Clara, and they come to my house to pick her up and to leave her after their outings. This is how Linda realized Ted's car on the front of my driveway, since I live

in a gated community, and it's forbidden this type of parking unless it's the homeowner's car. The first time she saw his car, Linda asked if I would call the security to tow the car, and I said no because it was Ted's they also used to FaceTime Clara three times a week. That's how they learned about some of her play dates and sleepovers with Marie. They called when Marie was still at the house with Clara and saw her. Two. They expected my toddler to travel alone on a plane? No. I think I couldn't explain well enough. James said they would travel to my city, take Clara with them on the plane to their state, and after a week they would bring her back. She was never supposed to travel alone, for what they

were planning. Three. Do I believe they were going to kidnap my daughter? I don't know. I think it's possible, some comments made me paranoid to be honest. James said they bought her tickets back, but I don't think I should trust him without proof. Their word means nothing now. For, do I still have contact with them? No, my lawyer advised me to cut all visits, video calls with Clara and only communicate with my daughter's grandparents through our lawyers. They are not blocked on my phone, but I will not receive any call from them. If they text me or email me, I'll have it sent to my lawyer. Trust me, today was all about making an FU binder

and documenting every little thing. Thank you a lot for the advice, guys. And don't worry much, Clara and I live in a very secure community, with cameras and armed security. Nobody will take her from me. Comments where OPP has replied, Commenter 1.

NTA. They bought plane tickets two months ago without asking you? That's not planning. ahead, that's delusional travel agency energy. You are Clara's mom and not some vacation rental they can book on Airbnb OOP. Exactly. That's what pissed me off the most, who does that with someone else's child? They act like Clara is their child, not mine. Comment her too. If I were you, I would get the most aggressive underhanded lawyer I could find to drag their names through the mud. You cannot trust your child with them. They do not

respect you. They are selfish and unreasonable fight fire with fire NTA OOP. My lawyer is a very fierce lady with almost 20 years of experience in family law. My sister is a lawyer and was her student on college. She immediately said I should phone her former teacher and I did. Comment her three. NTA, this is your child. They have no right to demand anything, and you were kind enough to include them in your life at all. Do you have a security system at your house? I would be worried about them showing up. OOP, I have a very good security system in my home. My dad made sure to supervise the installation when I moved to my house while pregnant. There's no way they will show up without being recorded. Commenter 4. NTA, you have been more than kind in fostering a relationship

with them. I am positive that they will not get custody, but I am curious about grandparents' rights. Is that a thing in your country slash state? If it is, I would fight to make sure all of the visits are near you. It would look bad for them to take her and try to keep her away from you, but they have already proven to be shady and underhanded. OOP, according to my lawyer, since Jack is dead, they have grandparents' rights here in my country. But only visitation and only on the same city the child lives, she thinks there's no way they'll have custody. So this could make them have less access to her than before. OOP clarifies details regarding the inheritance Clara has in her country after Jack's passing. Here her inheritance is already secured and received. She inherited 50% of her father's assets and will receive

his share when her grandparents pass away. It's the law. Here if you die without being married, or having a common law partner, you have to live at least six months with someone to be considered a legal partner 50% go to any children you have and 50% goes to your parents. In case your parents aren't alive, 100% will go to your children. The other way around if you are childless, 100% will go to your parents if they are alive. There's no need for an executor for her to receive the inheritance. But I did put her assets on an investment trust to avoid issues the future or accusations that I used all of her money. Update, February 11th, 2025. Hey, I posted my story here some months ago and was surprised about how this blew up fast, not only on Reddit but also on other

apps. I was not sure if I should post an update, since I was fearing being doxed, and also I received a ton of hate through messages and people reposting my story bullying me and wishing for me to lose my daughter's custody. About the possibility of doxing, I talked to my lawyer and showed her my post, and she said that I could update if I keep the fake names and don't give up on personal details. Until now, nobody in my life has discovered my post, which makes sense since English isn't our country's first language. Having said that, I like to also preface that my grammar and writing skills on English aren't the best, since this is my second language, but I was truly appalled about how many people attacked me for it. Some people said that I must be an alcoholic

to commit as many grammar mistakes and that I deserve to lose my daughter for being a drunk, which is not true, I don't drink. I know the internet can be toxic, but some people are wiling to go too far to bully others, this is very low. I just hope everyone that criticized my writing skills have better knowledge than I have while learning other language. When you guys start to speak or write in a second language I hope you don't meet someone like yourselves, who will bully you for not writing exactly in the proper way when it's not even your mother language. More than two months has passed, and a lot has happened since. My life was really chaotic for some weeks, and I felt that I couldn't celebrate Christmas

the way I truly wanted because I was constantly worried about the custody lawsuit. I am relieved to say now that this is over. Also, to the ones worried about Clara, I thank you guys for being so gentle. T.B.H. I think more people were nice and gentle than bullies, so I am truly thankful for your well wishes, from the bottom of my heart. Clara is healthy and happy. Luckily nobody tried anything to take her from me. I know a lot of you said they could try to kidnap her. I'm still worried about it, but nothing has happened. After I made my post, I spent several days working with my lawyer, my family, and even with the home security company I hired to ensure that Clara was safe, all my security cameras were working,

and that I had all the documentation needed for court. My lawyer and I prepared tons of documentation about me, Clara and even got the backlogs of visitation in my gated community that proves that Ted has never spent the night here. My family were very aware about my fears of kidnapping, and they made sure to always be around us. I have to thank you guys for the incredible advices I got. I don't want to put too much weight on talking about haters, because 90% of comments and messages were truly nice and caring. I tried my best to listen to my lawyer and many things you guys said we could do to ensure our safety. Not only that, but I talk to Clara's pediatrician, pediatric dentist, swimming teacher, even my parents' church where Clara sometimes goes to the kids' classes. They are aware of the

lawsuit and that nobody should give up information about Clara or me, under no circumstances. They are all on the same page and are giving us support and being understanding. Some people also advised me to speak to Clara's aunts to know if they are aware of the lawsuit and the possibility that their parents could try to take my daughter. I was not sure about how to do this, my lawyer said that I could try to communicate with them, but all via text or email. Before I could do this, Lily, Jack's younger sister that lives in Europe, texted me to ask if I had received Clara's Christmas gifts she sent through mail. I saw this as an opportunity and wrote a text explaining what was happening with her parents. Lily said she had no idea about the lawsuit or that they wanted to take Clara for Christmas

and fly with her on a plane. She said that she would speak with Ruth and ask her about this, since Ruth at the time was very distant from their family group chat. A day later, Lily and Ruth created a group chat to talk to me. They asked to have a video call with me, I said I had to talk to my lawyer first. My lawyer agreed to me doing the call, if they let me record it to make sure nothing would be used against me. Both agreed, and we had a video call that was enlightening to me. Ruth apologized to me for being absent from our lives over the last months. She was dealing with many personal issues, but had happy news to share. Ruth went through her third IVF round and as of now she is around 22 weeks pregnant with her first child.

She kept everything quiet, just Ruth and her husband Sam knew about the IVF proceedings and the pregnancy. She said this was because Linda used to put too much pressure and stress over her the other times they tried IVF. Ruth was distancing herself from things that raised her anxiety levels, and her mom was a main source of anxiety. Her pregnancy is a good news, but didn't surprise me, since I knew she was trying for a baby. I'm happy she finally was able to conceive. Here I have to explain that Linda is what people call boy mom. She never got along with her daughters. I had an inkling about that, but since I was not close to them, I had no idea about how bad her relationship with her daughters were, they just seemed distant and James was closer to their daughters. Ruth swore that she didn't know about the lawsuit until Lily called her the day before.

That after this, she talked to her dad and to his best friend, who's a lawyer, to understand what's going on. She was surprised that James' friend didn't know anything about the lawsuit, since he is usually the lawyer representing him. James, on the other way, tried to divert the subject when Ruth's asked. but she pressured him, and eventually he fooled and told her everything. James claims that he didn't want to sue me, but Linda's mental health has deteriorated to a point that he feared for her well-being. The only thing that could make her get out of bed is Clara and the thought of having her around. He ignored that this makes Linda the one who's not fit to raise a child, not me. His plan was to pressure me with the lawsuit, in order to make me to

accept a better deal of visitation for them. They wanted more days with her and to be able to to travel with her to their home multiple times a year. James never said that they wanted to keep her forever, but I am not trusting on his words. My trust is shattered. Ruth and Sam tore James a new one for suing me over custody to manipulate me and for not forcing Linda to go to therapy. He claimed Linda doesn't accept the idea of going to see a therapist, as she is not crazy, and said that she would not go under no circumstance. Ruth had to threaten James that if he didn't withdraw the lawsuit and get the help Linda and in need, she will go no contact and resign from the family business. She was very worried about the idea of them doing the same to Sam in case she dies,

and their child is left with her husband. James kind of broke after this and caved to Ruth's demands. After my call with Ruth and Lily, I was under the knowledge that the lawsuit would be terminated. Unfortunately in my country from the 20th of December until 20th of January the courts are on break. They only deal with emergency cases, mine wasn't. Their lawyer reached out to mine to talk about the end of the lawsuit and about writing a visitation agreement that the family court would approve. We agreed to work on this, but I would only sign any visitation agreement after they had withdrawn their lawsuit for custody and only if they agree to follow my rules. For what I know, after being pressured by her whole family, Linda eventually accepted to start therapy and she is

seeing a psychiatrist and a therapist. She was diagnosed with depression and PTSD related to Jack's death. I know this because my lawyer demanded that her doctors had to put an evaluation of Linda's mental state in order on our legal agreement for me to accept a visitation deal with Clara's grandparents. I never said here, but Jack's death was sudden and violent. He was a victim of a robbery gone wrong. All of us were shocked about his passing, but Linda and James took the brunt of it. I always felt that they didn't mourn enough, since they switched their attention to my pregnancy few weeks after his passing and I was right to think that. In our visitation agreement, I also demanded that both James and Linda have to go through grief counseling, to which they

agreed a number of sessions. Me, James and Linda are attending virtual family therapy for the first months of our agreement, to make sure we are on a healthy space to deal with our relationship and put Clara's well-being first. Regarding to this, I have nothing to complain. they accepted my terms pretty easily. They did try to fight against the idea of supervised visitation, but I had no reason to accept otherwise. Now they will visit Clara twice a month on a family center in my city, this is something my country has,

is a public building where things related to custody of minors and family problems regarding custody are handled. They have very good security there. Those visits will be supervised by a social worker who was assigned our case by the judge that signed our visitation agreement. About my fears of kidnapping, I have to say I didn't felt validated by my country laws. Basically me and my lawyer went to a police station and we did an occurrence about the possible kidnapping. They didn't seem to take this serious and as of now they will not press charges.

At least there's paperwork regarding my fears. James ended up sending my lawyer Clara's planes tickets to proof they bought her two tickets and were not planning on staying with her. Since they have money, I don't think it would be hard for them to bought a ticket back knowing they will not use it. So I am still not trusting or believing them. I don't have plans of letting them visit Clara without supervision. Even their aunts know that to see Clara they will have supervision too. Everyone is accepting this right now and the visits have starred over a couple of weeks ago. Let's see what happens in the future.

I also don't intend on traveling to their state or city in the near future. I am truly scared about the chances of they using their power to take my daughter, so I will not make it easier for them. Thank you again for the help and well wishes. As of now Clara and her mama bear are doing well and enjoying a couple of days I take have to spend quality time together and finally celebrate, since our Christmas was very stressful. I hope you enjoy this story. Spouse began to think he was part of a covert reality program, believed I was engaging in clandestine conversations regarding him. and then warned of taking action against me in the presence of our children. So I got him arrested.

My 30F, spouse, 35M, has been experiencing behavior that has only become increasingly concerning. In the past two months now, he has been talking about things that he claims are happening, but he's never mentioned before. As some background info, when his behavior first starting getting concerning, I managed to convince him to go the hospital to get checked out for his mental health. He wasn't even seen by a doctor and he was told he just needs to take a certain medicine to help him sleep. The issue is he also smokes weed so this medicine does not mix well with that. He won't quit smoking.

We also have two very young kids. Back to the weird recent behavior, he claims he had an old email with an inheritance that got hacked and he needs access to it. I tried helping him get on it but he hasn't used it in literally the 12 years we've been together. I only knew of its existence previously when I helped him switch his Facebook login and that was an email attached. Another example is that he believes everyone is talking about him to me and everyone else. I mean literally everyone else. He thinks there's some sort big thing planned to hurt him or do something horrible to him soon and that we're all on it. On a few other separate occasions he's asked about a show that we're on and asked how much money I'm being paid to keep a secret.

He also thinks I'm having secret phone calls and that I've apparently left the room to accept these calls, which then results in me coming back crying about something I've apparently discussed on the phone. Whenever I try to explain to him that none of this is happening, he fights back saying that I'm just lying to him and to tell him the truth. That I need to tell him the truth or something bad is going to happen. It's gotten so bad, he ended up getting fired from his job because he was barely showing up. He kept going to the cop station to make a report instead of going to work. After he got fired, there was some sort of tense situation where they ended up calling a wellness check for him, because they were afraid he's going to come back and hurt someone.

The cops showed up while I was also home and he said he wouldn't hurt someone. He only acts in defense. In the recent weeks, he's gone from screaming at me demanding answers to just not talking to me at all. At this point I'd rather he'd just not interact with me. The reason I'm writing this is because of what happened today. It was a nice day out and I asked if he would come with me for a walk with our kids, to which he agreed to.

He barely spoke a word to me or the kids on this walk. And when we came across a playground, I asked if we should take the kids there for a few minutes of play. He then got upset at me for suggesting it and said, I always control everything and I'm the queen of the decisions. I didn't even tell him we were doing that, I just asked. When I mentioned this he just said do whatever you want, like always, so I figured why not. So I played with the kids at the playground and he did his own thing. Someone left a couple various balls there and he was throwing them around. He then picked up the football and threw it in my direction.

It flew past me a couple feet from me. I asked why he did that and he said, why are you upset? It didn't hit you to which I responded well, what if it did? He then said if I wanted it to hit you in the head I would have thrown it that way. Then he started on a rant about how he's going through the same thing with everyone lying to him. After which he sat down in the corner of the park and was doing literally nothing. I was getting upset, so I packed up the kids and started walking to leave the park. I said to him we're going home and started walking away.

Apparently he tried to yell out to us but ended up taking a different way home than we did. He told me this when he met me on the street when we were almost home, saying that next time I want to be an idiot and walk away maybe stop and listen for him calling out. I didn't hear him but honestly he could have easily caught up to us. I was getting more and more upset and said I wanted to go for a drive to get coffee and he said fine. I said I wanted to take the kids and he asked why. Then I said fine, you stay home with them and he said no they can go with you and started putting them in the car. I got in the car and he got in the passenger seat, to which I asked him if he's coming with. He said yes and to drive.

I told him I didn't want him coming with because he's being mean and he said he could be a lot meaner. As I started driving away he kept going off on the usual BS he's been talking about lately and I told him I don't want to hear it. He started screaming at me to keep driving and shut the fuck up. I stopped the car and told him to get out and he made a motion like he was going to punch me but punched his hand in front of my face. At this point I started crying and yelling at him to get out and he yelled back, no, just drive. I then said I should just drive him to the police station for that and he said he would choke me unconscious before we even got there. I was crying even more at this point and said I don't want to be with him anymore and I want him out, he said no. He continued

to be a dick for the rest of the car ride, where I pleaded with him to not treat me this way, especially in front of our children. It's not fair to them, or to me. He said to not bring them into this. I said how couldn't I, they are literally in the car. Anyway, after I drove us home, he asked how long I've been waiting to break up with him and who I'm replacing him with. I told him I haven't been and there's no one else, which of course he doesn't believe. When he got inside, he even taunted me saying I should take you to the cop station in a girly voice.

He's outside smoking and I'm inside with the kids writing this. Of course I'm shook up currently but I don't know what to do. We only have the one vehicle which is in both our names. The place we rent is actually my mom so we don't have a lease but we both have our addresses attached to this place on our licenses. He wasn't always like this, literally only the past couple months his behavior has been this bad. I missed the person he used to be, I missed that he would spend time with me, with the kids, but he spends all his time by himself now.

I don't know if he's going through some sort of manic episode or what's triggering this change in behavior, but I really don't know what to do. Is there something differently I can do to help him? Every time he talks to me about whatever situation he doesn't accept any answer I say and also won't accept if I say nothing. Edit, I just wanted to update and let you all know we are safe. I'm sorry for not saying anything sooner.

I'm a bit overwhelmed with how popular this post. got and will give an actual update later. Thank you for the advice and comments as well. I will mention a couple things. We are not in the U.S. where we are. Marijuana is legal, so my spouse does get it from government-run dispensaries. I don't think there's a chance his stuff gets laced aside from the fact he mixes cigarettes with it. A lot of people mention meth. There is just no way. He doesn't go anywhere random. He doesn't talk to people outside of our household, aside from the few times he would go to the police station. I have his location on his phone so I can see where he goes when he leaves.

Update 1, hello, first of all thank you all for the comments, messages, etc. on my previous post. Obviously it got a bit too much to keep up with responding, but I just want to say I really appreciate the help. To give an update, I left the house the night I made the post, but went back home the following day. I wanted to be able to collect some sort of evidence I could use, because my spouse has been really good at downplaying his symptoms to any authority figure. I want to mention that I had been present at most doctor and hospital visits prior, so I know what they did recommend for him. I felt at the time that they did not give him enough help for the crisis he was obviously

going through. Anyway, continuing on, the couple days after the Sunday post, he did not really engage in much conversation with me or our children. Every time he entered the room, I set my phone to record. I did not get anything until Thursday, when he finally started talking to me again. He was questioning who I had been talking to about him and who has been trying to sabotage his life. Obviously I denied everything, because there is no one talking to me about him, aside from this Reddit post, which he didn't know about. This started to anger him, which included him yelling at me and saying if anyone is talking to me about him, to bring him to the house,

he can take care of them himself. I tried to not to engage anymore. This made him more upset, as he was continuing to demand answers from me. He would then say, oh, I want to hit you or don't make me slap you when I was either not answering or just saying I didn't know what he was talking about. I got this on recording. After he ended up walking away and leaving the room, I took the kids to bed, locked us in our room and tried to sleep. The following morning, he insisted on driving me to work. I told him I wanted the car, to which he disagreed with me and said he needed it. After dropping out kids off, he started going off on me about how I am stupidity, dumb, a bitch, etc. for keeping his inheritance. Again something he is clearly having delusions about from him.

I tried to disengage completely, keeping myself to far side of the passenger seat, which caused him to grab me by the back of my neck and pull me closer to him, where he told me to listen to him. I obviously reacted to this and was super upset, telling him to please focus on driving and not touch me again. After he drove me to work, the last thing I said to him as he was still going off on me with the car window open, was you desperately need help. Once I got in, I called my boss and let her know what happened. She came in, canceled her appointments for the day, and took me to the police station. We made a report, although the sergeant we initially spoke to seemed to be against us making a report, he kept saying he will be homeless if I report him, like he's the victim in this scenario.

I told him my safety and the kid's safety should be more important, and he brought in a different officer to make the statement with me. Once I completed that statement, they let me know to stay away from the house as they were going to arrest him, and we'll call once he's out of the house. About five hours later, he was arrested. Apparently he was very compliant, and with all the information I provided, they actually took him to the hospital, and he is currently on a 30-day psychiatric hold. He will be going to court at some point for uttering threats and assault, but seeing how he doesn't have a criminal record, I'm sure it will just end up being a slap on the wrist. So as of now, I am home, safe with the children, and we are getting our locks changed.

I will also most likely get a protection order, but in an ideal world, he gets better and that's not necessary. I guess we will see in the future. I want to again thank everyone for their comments and assistance. A lot of you made some excellent points, and although I know some of my decisions probably seemed like dumb ones, I was trying to figure out the best solution logistically for us. Any other future updates will be on my profile. Update 2, it's been a while since I updated. I still get messages asking how I am and to update again. I apologize in the delay.

Anyway, on to the actual update. my spouse is doing a lot better. He received the treatment he needed in the psych ward of the hospital, gets a shot every so often instead of taking pills, and only smoke cigarettes now. He's back to his normal self, engages in conversation with myself and our children like he did before this crazy shit happened, has a job, and honestly, is being a better partner overall. It took a lot of time for me to feel like I could trust him again, but we've taken a lot of time to work on things and get back to how we should be. I know a lot of people wanted me to leave and never look back. But you have to realize how he acted in my initial post was nothing like how he is as a person.

Obviously he had some sort of weird psychosis happening, which could have been a result of a high intake of marijuana, plus a couple added stressors. I don't want to go into too many details because it will give away where we are, but basically something traumatic happened under 10 years ago that happened again a month before he started acting strange. It was one of those types of events that forces you out of your home for undetermined amount of time. Anyway, that's all the detail I want to go into. Obviously, he was affected by it more than I thought, because when this event happened, I was the one having a difficult time and he was my rock. But after we were able to go back home and have some normalcy, that's when things started changing for him.

It started with him randomly needing to gain access into an old email, to thinking he was being recorded all the time like he was on the Truman Show or something, to thinking that everyone, including me, was out to get him. This is when the threats of violence started happening. I was obviously in disbelief because in the entire time we've been together, nothing like this has ever happened. I never once felt like I was unsafe. I never felt scared until the threats continue to come,

and he started to escalate. After he made excellent progress in the hospital and I had many reassuring conversations with the psychiatrist, I allowed him to come home when he was discharged. It was so hard not having him around, I cried all the time, our kids really missed their dad, and he really missed us. He needed to get help, and I'm so thankful I was able to find an effective solution. This will most likely be my last update. I don't really think I'll need to add any other details, but again, I just want to thank everyone for their messages and comments, even the ones who called me an idiot, L.O.L.

next story X used the power of attorney I forgot about to sell my house, empty my bank account, and sell all my belongings while I was getting medical treatment abroad. I have gone from terrified to white-hot anger to just cold in my stomach and all sorts of other feelings and it is taking me some time to write this so I apologize for anything which is unclear. Background, I was just out of the country for over two months while I was being treated by specialists for medical problems I have. During that time I had my personal valuables kept at a storage company which was supposed to be good for security since I don't have close family and didn't want to leave things like my computer sitting around in my apartment for that long. I also have some payments I get which I made sure would automatically go to an account because I have renters in my old house and want to make sure certain bills get paid without me having to think about it. I thought it was all set up good enough that I could be out of the country and focus on what I needed to focus on then come back to everything as I left it.

A while ago when I was in a lot of pain and on a lot of medication I had a lawyer help me make sure my, now, X could make decisions for me if I was incapacitated. Honestly, I had totally forgotten about this because at the time I was very foggy, I barely remember anything about it. The night before my flight my ex told me they could not be with me anymore because of my health problems, saying I was going to die and they did not want to be with me for that. My issues are pretty bad and yes my life will maybe not be as long as it might have been but I really could not deal with that at the time mentally so just said okay and went on my trip. We had been together for 16 months but not strictly living together. Now, I came back to learn somehow my ex has started taking and maybe selling everything. They have paperwork saying I was incapacitated plus the power of attorney I granted them. I was not incapacitated at any time during my treatment.

I don't know what doctor could have signed such a thing. During the time I was gone, my ex has used this to check my belongings out of storage and I have no idea where my things are. I am worried it has all been sold. Stuff has also been taken out of my apartment. The tenants in my house were told by my ex that I was bedridden and they would have to move so my house could be sold. They are month to month and took this at face value and already moved out before I got back. They informed me that a realtor had been showing the house to people. I managed to get in touch with the realtor and when I got him to understand the situation he freaked out.

There is already a buyer because my house was listed very far under market value. Stuff was already signed, some money has already been paid, the buyers are already getting ready to move in. I told him to cancel everything and that this was not authorized in any way. He said the paperwork my ex had was legit and he needs to figure out. how to handle this. I am waiting for more details. The account I set up before I left is cleaned out down to pennies I missed an important payment because of this. The bank says yes my ex accessed my account and everything was in order because I was incapacitated. My ex knew I was setting this account up and what it was for. They probably got details about it from my apartment. I have talked to my ex and the

police. My ex barely responds but when I stood at their door and screamed they finally told me that I was in a coma, not true, so they had to sell my things for me. I think I heard them saying you won't need it anyway through the door. The police are telling me a few things. I tried to report my ex for theft for stealing my things from storage and was told it is a civil issue. I told them the rest of the story and it's like they don't even know how to respond to me. Sitting at the police station seems to just be wasting my time because no one there seems to be able to do anything. They say come back tomorrow when someone else will be there. Supposedly officers went to my ex's place and were shown the paperwork. Tomorrow I am going to see a lawyer who

advertises help with elder abuse power of attorney fraud, which is the closest thing I could find. If they can't help me then, where do I go next? Is there some key thing I can say to the police to get them to arrest my ex right this second and stop this? I have to believe this will all be fixed eventually but how screwed am I? Comments were Op has replied, deleted, did you ever actually give a P-O-A? You need to revoke that ASAP. Oop, it is possible. I signed documents giving them the ability to use my money for me to pay bills and do other things a while ago because I was unable to leave the hospital. I will be able to take care of that with the lawyer tomorrow I hope. And I know I seem like an idiot. I did not really understand what I was doing at the time. I was in a lot of pain and did not

have an exact diagnosis yet and I must have thought it was the right thing to do but I don't even remember exactly when it happened because parts of that time are all a blur. Update, I was being a bit paranoid when making my original post because I did not want to get condescending responses. I'm a woman in my early 30s and my ex is a man around the same age. It has been a strange few days. I met with my lawyer Monday morning and she was very supportive. Even though she usually deals with elder abuse, she said my situation was very much within her expertise and seemed excited to have me as a client.

She was also very angry. After last Saturday I have not had a lot of emotional energy so it was nice to see someone be like that on my behalf. I spent a while in my lawyer's office and later in the day my ex called me but my lawyer had told me not to talk to him for now so I did not answer. We listened to a message together, though, and my ex said he was selling things for my benefit and was investing it for me to help with any bills I have to pay. My ex also said they were interested in getting back together since I came back safely from my trip. My lawyer laughed and it was a very surreal moment.

After just a day my lawyer found out that my ex had done something like this before. He had been with a person who was very sick for a while then took off with the contents of a joint account and their car right before they died. The person's estate got into a legal battle with my ex and got the car back, but not the money in the end. She thinks this is basically what my ex was doing to me and that they probably did it other times too, but was not always sued over it or it was in other states. The whole relationship we had was just fake, I guess, and he misread the situation when I was leaving to go see specialists thinking I was probably not coming back. That also explains why he never had a job if he just makes money off people like me. My lawyer sent a lot of letters out to lots of places on Monday, including one to my ex.

They were all about revoking the power of attorney I had granted and the one to my ex had a bunch of demands in it telling him to produce my money and belongings as well as copies of the power of attorney and the other documents my ex had about me. She spoke with the realtor and some other people about my house and the unfortunate reality is I should probably let the sale happen and take the money. That is not really what I wanted to hear, but it's not the end of the world. She also had me get someone to change the locks on my apartment. Wednesday was a weird day because my ex showed up at my lawyer's office with some of my stuff.

I wasn't there so I don't know exactly what that was like, but I do have my computer back. My ex also produced the access codes for online investments made with my money, which seems to have pissed off my lawyer because it's going to be a headache making sure I get all my money back. She has dealt with this before and is going to help me recover as much of it as possible. She also says we will almost definitely be going after my ex for money because there are a lot of problems with what he did and the power of attorney itself is very suspect. But she needs to talk to the hospital and some other people first. My lawyer says it's a big deal that the paperwork my ex was using to say I was incapacitated is from when I was hospitalized around the time the power of attorney actually happened. To sum it all up, now I have my computers back, but my money is in online investments and it may be difficult to get the full value back.

It is also likely that the rest of the money from the sale of my house is coming directly to me. My lawyer is super awesome and she is spending a lot of time devoted to this for me which feels really good. I just saw my local doctor and he doesn't like that I am under so much stress right after I came home, so I'm going to try and relax. I hope you enjoy this story. I harbor deep feelings for my closest companion for a couple of years despite his lack of reciprocation. Following a period of emotional distress and introspection, I abruptly cut off

communication with him and all my acquaintances. Truly, this was a necessary step for my well-being. It's pretty straightforward. We met about two years ago and I instantly crushed on the guy. I honestly thought our first few nights out were dates, up until the point he went on a rant about a girl he had a crush on after a few beers. At that point, my thought process was pretty much Okie, not dates, got it and moved on with the intent of friendship. Except, funny thing, turns out he checks all my boxes. I've never gotten along with anyone this well. People are shocked to find out, or well, not anymore.

But up until about a year after we became friends, we haven't known each other for years and years. We have the same humor, like the same games and TV shows, agree on politics, want the same things in life, all well enough to get along, but still with enough differences that we can have conversations about it. We discover bands together, we help each other with work and writing papers, I call them when I'm sad and we both think it feels weird to not see each other for a week. Problem is, I'm completely head over fucking heels in love with the man and it is starting to get to the point where I don't know what to do. I thought it'd go away, but every time I meet him it's like I'm falling all over again.

My friends have gone from teasing me about it to shooting me pitying looks whenever his name is brought up. My sister wants me to just stop seeing him. I go a week without talking to him and I think I'm starting to get over it, but whenever I see him again, it all comes rushing back. I don't know what to do. It hurts and it's not fun anymore. I've been on dates with some amazing guys who liked me,

but my feelings for my friend is stopping me from falling for someone else. It's starting to feel pathetic and at this point I see no good option. He's my best friend, the best I've ever had, and I just don't want to lose him. At this point I think asking him out would achieve that, since it's been so long since we met. I know the only way, for me personally, to get over someone is to stop seeing them. But I don't want to lose my best friend. The finishing touch keeping me on the hook are these looks he gives me. I've had other friends confirm he does this.

because I was honest to God starting to think I was losing my fucking mind. Whenever we're out in a group, at a party or the pub, whenever I look over at him, it seems he's always looking at me. And these eye contacts last way too long to be normal. Like, a good six, seven seconds of us just looking at each other across the table, or the room, or the bar. And he does this little smile. I've never seen it on him in any other situation. I don't know what it means. I have no idea why we do this or how it came to be. But it's the final fucking nail in this coffin of hopelessness I'm buried in right now. I don't know if I'm crazy and over-interpreting things, which is very likely, or if I should just give it a shot and ask him out, even though

it might ruin the friendship, or just stop seeing him, or to just carry on and hope this feeling goes away at some point of the distant future. I'm so frustrated I want to cry and have cried. A lot of I just don't know what to do here. Update, November 13th, 2024. So, hello. I made a post on this looking for advice on how to handle my incredibly painful unrequited love for my best friend. I'd honestly forgotten about this until making a password reset on another account. But as I read through the post, I remember how very comforting and terrifying the responses to my post was, being a more or less unanimous ass come out that scared my ass to death. Sorry that this isn't really a happy update, but...

I don't know. It felt weird seeing something I wrote in what feels like a different life, and the people who responded seemed so genuinely kind and trying to help, I feel like I weirdly owe some kind of update. Especially for that one, dear, sweet commenter whose account is now deleted. I so wish I'd have a way to reach out to them, because that was one of the most thoughtful comments I think I've ever gotten. And just to recap, with hindsight, I really, really was in love with this man and I had been

for about two years. Like, full nine yards in love. Struggling to breathe when he talked about someone else but still cheering him on because he deserved happiness levels of in love. If that sounds a bit like obsession to you, then that's because it probably was. The thing about unrequited love, the thing that really sucks about it, is that it's incredibly hard to move on from. But until you do move on, your brain keeps obsessing about it to the point where it can be impossible to get anything done. It had been two years of that when I made that post, two years of pining and pain and an ever-growing pile of crushed hopes, and I think I was going a little bit insane, constantly swinging between

butterflies and love highs when I was with my friend and the crushing feeling of rejection every time he'd say goodbye. And the obsession over things like how long he'd look at me, how long he'd let a hug last, how fast he'd respond to my texts, things which could either make or break my entire day depending on what the answer was. On to the actual update, after that primer. About a month and a half or so after I made that post, still trying to hike myself up to actually ask this man out, I accidentally became a head organizer for an event at the university I was studying at for the moment.

Long story short, the person managing me was not kind, I was extremely overworked from the event on top of writing a thesis. I was equally stressed out in my private life due to the whole situation with my best friend, and I ended up going through a pretty severe case of burnout. Add on to everything that I developed an addiction to alcohol to try to handle everything, and was also experiencing what was most likely a drug-induced paranoid psychosis. And I was a mess. I ended up moving back in with my dad in September, and spent about a year doing nothing but sleeping, crying, playing Skyrim and going to rehab and therapy. Start of 2021, I went back to school and slowly recovered. I've been sober since

2020, the paranoia hasn't completely gone away, but it's more manageable. I used to think my landlord listened to me through a radon measurement device, and at least that's over. And I think I've got a work-life balance figured out that helps me not overwork myself or go into free time lethargy because I've got too much time off. It was long and painful, but I did it. If you're a wondering where my best friend was in all of this, I honestly don't know. I went back to look at our text messages, and from what I can see he tried to call me a few times in early September, I didn't respond, and then nothing until around Christmas when he wondered if I wanted to meet up sometime. I said yes, and then never followed through. He hasn't texted me since January 4th, 2020.

Now, to be clear, I don't blame him for not reaching out more. My non-responding is what killed that friendship. I know, because it also killed every other friendship I had at the time. I don't know, alcohol addiction, deep depression and crippling paranoia may be a fair explanation to one day stop responding to any of your friends, but I still deeply regret those choices. If I were to make a Relationship's post today, it would be on how the fuck you word an apology after behavior like that, five years down the road. Sorry. I feel like this is starting to become a journal. I'm going to stop my reflections there. So, about my love for my best friend, with some years of hindsight and therapy behind me,

I don't think I was in love with him. I think I was in love with the idea of him, and I think I was obsessed for sure, but looking back, I don't know. I genuinely don't know. I think a part of me really liked the fact that this was a person who so clearly wasn't interested in me, genuinely, if he was, that would shock me to find out. because he spent two and a half years ignoring the in hindsight very obvious attempts I made to deepen the relationship. Some examples include, him saying he's waiting for the right person, me responding sometimes I feel like I already have.

Do you ever feel like that? And him going, nah, I don't think so, me following that up with maybe you just don't know. The heart is weird sometimes in him going I'm pretty sure I'd know. One time we talked about why people fall in love, and I genuinely tried to convince him a deep friendship was all you needed. While he insisted that there needed to be a level of sexual attraction as well, I tried to get him to do that 36 questions that will make you fall in love thing with me, I kept trying to find excuses to hold his hand. Rest in peace, my palm reading career, you were nothing but a thinly veiled attempt at finger touching, and him resolutely never going along with it, ditto, but with hugs, arm touching, and sitting just a little too close whenever we went out so I could hear him better,

which he normally responded to by going we should go outside so you can hear better if it's too loud in here. Very thoughtful, but very much not what the goal was. One night, when we were alone in my apartment after a club event, after a particularly long shared look, I asked him what he was thinking about and that kind of I don't want to break the illusion soft voice you put on when you're really fucking close to someone you like. And his response was, I don't know if I agreed that Gertz's metaphor about blinking

makes that much sense, actually, for context, we bickered about that earlier in the night, since we just read some article about it in class. I did not expect it to make a comeback at that point. Another night, when we were out together and there had been a lot of looks and closely leaned and laughing together, and he pulls me to one side by the hand to talk to me about something, heart racing. Only to ask me if I know if one of my friends is single because he thinks she's really fucking cute and might have been looking at him all night looking back. At least, some of this stuff is sort of funny. I have no idea if he knew or knows now that I was in love with him. I wouldn't be surprised if some of my old friends eventually told him, but of course he's

never reached out about it. But yes, I think I kind of like the security of this person who clearly didn't like me back. Not that I was doing well with a heartache, but there's a certain kind of fucked up comfort that comes from pining for someone who doesn't want you back. Like, the highs I'd get when I got something that felt like confirmation made up for the lows of crying in my apartment stairway when I got home after a denial. Today, I mostly just feel so bad for him and ashamed of myself. Regardless of whether he knew or not, and I'm trying to cling to the fact that he seemed to at least continue wanting to be friends as some indicator that he never felt creeped out

or uncomfortable. My behavior was pretty fucking creepy. And in the end, once I did get that distance between us, the feelings went away after some six months or so. My therapist recommended not meeting this person again, for my own sake, and by early 2020 I wasn't so painfully in love anymore. A while later I'd end up meeting a guy I clicked with just as much, who actually liked me back and showed it. We've been together for almost three years now, and are talking about starting to try for kids at some point soon. He'd like us to get married first, but is also insisting he wants to be the one to propose,

so I'm just walking around waiting for the day. Even if it's not a huge surprise or secret, he just wants to get that moment of going down on one knee, and who am I to deny him? I'm slowly growing old and boring. I'm sober, I go to my boring, stable, middle career 9 to 5 job, I save for my retirement and traveling on the summers. I help my dad out on his farm,

I crochet little animals for my newborn niece. I come home to a man who plays his silly video, games, I play my silly video games, we go for walks into the museum and bicker about whether to get fat on takeout or not. I have some regrets about how my early 20s ended up playing out, but by God, I wouldn't want to go back. Next story, daughter wanted to live with her deadbeat bio mom who abandoned her, so I cut off her college fund. A week later she discovered her mom stole $10,000 from her. Hello everyone. I'm a single dad to my 18-year-old daughter, Emma. Her bio-mom left us when she was young, and I've raised her with the help of my wife,

who has been a wonderful mother figure. Recently, Emma started reconnecting with her bio-mom, and I initially supported this, hoping it would be a positive experience. However, it quickly became apparent that her bio-mom hadn't changed. Emma began making excuses for her and started exhibiting increasingly hostile behavior toward my wife. She would say things like, maybe I'll just move in with my mom and leave you both behind, and you're not my real mom anyway, so what do you care? It escalated to threats where she implied she would ruin our lives if we tried to stop her from pursuing this relationship. During a heated argument, Emma expressed her desire to move in with her bio mom. This was the breaking point for me. Feeling that I needed to set boundaries,

I decided to cut off her college fund and told her she had to leave our home. Since then, my family has been vocal about their disapproval. They believe I should have been more understanding and that I overreacted. Some even argue that I'm pushing her further away and harming our relationship permanently. They think I should have tried harder to support her rather than resorting to such drastic measures. I'd offer taking this step, or was I justified in cutting her off? Update 1, thanks to everyone who commented on my original post. I didn't expect to have an update so quickly, but a lot has happened in just the past few hours. About five hours after I posted, I got a message from Emma asking if we could meet up. She suggested a nearby coffee shop, and although I was unsure of what to expect, I agreed to meet her.

When I arrived, I could tell right away that something was different. Emma looked exhausted and stressed, not at all like the confident person who left our home. She told me that her time with her by a mom had been a disaster. Not only had her mom treated her coldly, but she also demanded an exorbitant amount of money for rent, far more than Emma could afford. It became clear to Emma that her mom wasn't interested in having a real relationship with her, just in using her for financial gain. Emma was visibly upset as she apologized for the way she had treated me and my wife. She admitted that she'd made a huge mistake and asked if she could come back home. It was obvious she was genuinely remorseful, and she said she realized now how much we had done for her.

I told her that I'm willing to work on rebuilding our relationship, but it's going to take time and effort on both sides. We discussed setting some boundaries and working through the issues that led to all of this in the first place. She agreed, and we left the coffee shop with a plan to move forward, one step at a time. It's not going to be an easy road, but I'm hopeful that we can heal from this and come out stronger on the other side. I'm still processing everything, but I'm relieved that Emma wants to make things right. Update 2, hey everyone, I've got another update, and things have gotten even more intense since my last post. A day after Emma and I reconciled, her bio mom showed up at our house.

I didn't expect her to come here, but she was furious, screaming about how I had taken her daughter away and how I was trying to turn Emma against her. She was completely out of control, and it quickly became clear that she wasn't going to leave peacefully. I tried to calm her down, but nothing worked, so I had no choice but to call the cops. When the police arrived, Emma was visibly shaken. As they escorted her mom away, Emma asked me to press charges. She was done with her mom's manipulations and wanted to protect herself from any further harm. While we were dealing with the fallout, Emma mentioned that her bio mom had access to her credit card.

We decided to check her account, and that's when we discovered something shocking. Her mom had taken out $10,000 without Emma's knowledge. We were both stunned and heartbroken. After reporting the theft to the police, we started doing some digging of our own. We found out that Emma's bio mom was drowning in debt. She'd been using Emma as a financial lifeline, which explained the outrageous demands for rent and the recent theft. She was desperate and willing to do anything to get her hands on. more money. We provided all the evidence to the police, and they're now investigating her for fraud.

Emma is devastated but also relieved that the truth is coming to light. We're working with the bank to try to recover the stolen money, and I've hired a lawyer to help us navigate the legal process. This whole situation has been incredibly tough on Emma, but she's been strong through it all. We're focusing on moving forward and rebuilding trust. I'm grateful that she came back home when she did, who knows how much worse things could have gotten if she'd stayed with her mom any longer. It's going to take time to heal from all of this, but we're on the right path now. Emma knows she has our full support, and we're committed to helping her get through this. I'm just glad we caught on to what was happening before it was too late.

Comments where Op has replied, poop on his wife's role in his daughter's life as a stepmom slash maternal figure. Boop. My wife has been her maternal figure ever since she was three, so she has a say in it and also the bio mom has never raised a finger in raising. I raised her and always gave her what she wanted to a certain extent, though. Commenter one, Udi, you are in your feelings and not being understanding and apparent. You are upset because she's rejecting your wife, you are disregarding her feelings when she says you loved your wife more

instead of asking why does she feel like that? You may think your wife is this great person but she may not be to your daughter. You're protecting your wife because your daughter is rejecting her, allow her space to navigate that relationship W. her mom without you punishing her. Oop, I have seen firsthand how my wife treats my daughter. To be exact, she did all the work for my daughter as my wife is sterile and would help in holiday H.W. Maths and even hug her, and my daughter would always praise her when I asked her if she had any problems with her comment or two.

Yes, you are being petty. She's an adult now and she wants to establish a relationship with her mom. for you to punish her for choices that have nothing to do with her college education is incredibly irresponsible and makes you just as bad as her mom. Oop, her mom abandoned her and never looked back until she was 18 obviously am compelled. Commenter 3. Just let her figure out that her bio mom is a piece of shit that's the best way to go about it. Update 3, September 24th, 2024. Hey everyone, I've got another update, and this one has been extremely difficult for our family.

After we pressed charges and discovered the theft of $10,000 from Emma's credit card, her bio mom started harassing us nonstop. It started with constant phone calls and text messages, both to me and Emma, begging, demanding, and threatening us to drop the lawsuit. She even began showing up at our workplaces. At my office, she caused a scene, screaming at the receptionist to let her in, calling me a thief and claiming I was ruining her life. Emma's job wasn't spared either. Her bio-mom went there too, embarrassing her in front of her co-workers and even threatening to expose personal details about our family if we didn't drop the charges. We tried to block her out, but things came to a head when she showed up at our house again. This time, she was even more out of control.

She started screaming and calling my wife all kinds of vile names, including a nasty whore, claiming she had stolen Emma from her. We tried to get her to leave, but she refused. And then it happened, she physically attacked my wife. She shoved her into a wall and started hitting and scratching her. Emma and I were in complete shock. My wife was just trying to defend herself, but her bio mom kept coming at her. Seeing my wife terrified and hurt was my breaking point.

I immediately called the cops. When the police arrived, they arrested her for assault. My wife is now traumatized from the incident. She's been struggling with anxiety and can't sleep well, knowing that she was physically attacked in her own home. She's seeing a therapist to try to deal with the emotional scars left from this nightmare. Emma is devastated too. She never imagined her bio-mom would go this far,

and seeing her attack my wife has left her shaken. We're doing everything we can to support each other, but the impact has been immense. Now, with her bio-mom in custody and facing multiple charges, including assault and harassment, we're hoping we can finally find some peace. It's hard to believe how far this situation has escalated, but I'm glad that, at least for now, we're safe from further harassment. We'll be taking legal steps to ensure a restraining order is in place moving forward.

This has been a painful chapter for my family, but we're determined to get through it together. Thank you again for all your support during this time. it's been a lifeline for us. I hope you enjoy this story. I harbored deep feelings for my closest companion for a couple of years despite his lack of reciprocation. Following a period of emotional distress and reflection, I suddenly cut off all communication with him and my social circle. To be frank, this decision was necessary for my well-being. It's pretty straightforward. We met about two years ago and I instantly crushed on the guy. I honestly thought, our first few nights out were dates, up until the point he went on a rant about a girl he had a

crush on after a few beers. At that point, my thought process was pretty much oaky, not dates, got it and moved on with the intent of friendship. Except, funny thing, turns out he checks all my boxes. I've never gotten along with anyone this well. People are shocked to find out, or well, not anymore. But up until about a year after we became friends, we haven't known each other for years and years. We have the same humor, like the same games and TV shows, agree on politics, want the same things in life, all well enough to get along, but still with enough differences that we can have conversations about it. We discover bands together, we help each other with work and writing papers, I call them when I'm sad and we both think it feels weird to not see each other for a week.

Problem is, I'm completely head over fucking heels in love with the man and it is starting to get to the point where I don't know what to do. I thought it'd go away, but every time I meet him it's like I'm falling all over again. My friends have gone from teasing me about it to shooting me pitying looks whenever his name is brought up. My sister wants me to just stop seeing him. I go a week without talking to him and I think I'm starting to get over it, but whenever I see him again, it all comes rushing back. I don't know what to do. It hurts and it's not fun anymore. I've been on dates with some amazing guys who liked me,

but my feelings for my friend is stopping me from falling for someone else. It's starting to feel pathetic and at this point I see no good option. He's my best friend, the best I've ever had, and I just don't want to lose him. At this point I think asking him out would achieve that, since it's been so long since we met. I know the only way, for me personally, to get over someone is to stop seeing them. But I don't want to lose my best friend.

The finishing touch keeping me on the hook are these looks he gives me. I've had other friends confirm he does this, because I was honest to God starting to think I was losing my fucking mind. Whenever we're out in a group, at a party or the pub, whenever I look over at him, it seems he's always looking at me. And these eye contacts last way too long to be normal. Like, a good six, seven seconds of us just look at just looking at each other across the table, or the room, or the bar.

And he does this little smile. I've never seen it on him in any other situation. I don't know what it means. I have no idea why we do this or how it came to be. But it's the final fucking nail in this coffin of hopelessness I'm buried in right now. I don't know if I'm crazy and over-interpreting things, which is very likely, or if I should just give it a shot and ask him out, even though it might ruin the friendship, just stop seeing him, or to just carry on and hope this feeling goes away at some point of the

distant future. I'm so frustrated I want to cry and have cried. A lot. I just don't know what to do here. Update, November 13th, 2024. So, hello. I made a post on this looking for advice on how to handle my incredibly painful unrequited love for my best friend. I'd honestly forgotten about this until making a password reset on another account. But as I read through the post, I remember how very comforting and terrifying the responses to my post was, being a more or less unanimous ass come out that scared my ass to death. Sorry that this isn't really a happy update, but I don't know. It felt weird seeing something I wrote in what feels like a different life, and the people who responded seemed so genuinely kind and trying to help. I feel like I weirdly

owe some kind of update? Especially for that one, dear, sweet commenter whose account is now deleted. I so wish I'd have a way to reach out to them. Because that was one of the most thoughtful comments I think I've ever gotten. And just to recap, with hindsight, I really, really was in love with this man and I had been for about two years. Like, full nine yards in love. Struggling to breathe when he talked about someone else but still cheering him on because he deserved happiness levels of in love. If that sounds a bit like obsession to you, then that's because it probably was. The thing about unrequited love, the thing that really sucks about it, is that it's incredibly hard to move on from. But until you do move on, your brain keeps obsessing

about it to the point where it can be impossible to get anything done. It had been two years of that when I made that post, two years of pining and pain and an ever-growing pile of crushed hopes, and I think I was going a little bit insane, constantly swinging between butterflies and love highs when I was with my friend and the crushing feeling of rejection every time he'd say goodbye. And the obsession over things like how long he'd look at me, how long he'd let a hug last, how fast he'd respond to my texts, things which could either make or break my entire day depending on what the answer was. On to the actual update, after that primer. About a month and a half or so after I made that post, still trying to hike myself up to actually ask this man out, I accidentally became a head organizer for an event at the university I was studying at for the moment.

Long story short, the person managing me was not kind, I was extremely overworked from the event on top of writing a thesis. I was equally stressed out in my private life due to the whole situation with my best friend, and I ended up going through a pretty severe case of burnout. add on to everything that I developed an addiction to alcohol to try to handle everything, and was also experiencing what was most likely a drug-induced paranoid psychosis. And I was a mess. I ended up moving back in with my dad in September, and spent about a year doing nothing but sleeping, crying, playing Skyrim and going to rehab and therapy. Start of 2021, I went back to school and slowly recovered.

I've been sober since 2020, the paranoia hasn't completely gone. away, but it's more manageable. I used to think my landlord listened to me through a radon measurement device, and at least that's over. And I think I've got a work-life balance figured out that helps me not overwork myself or go into free time lethargy because I've got too much time off. It was long and painful, but I did it. If you're wondering where my best friend was in all of this, I honestly don't know. I went back to look at our text messages, and from what I can see he tried to call me a few times in early September, I didn't respond, and then nothing until around Christmas when he wondered if I wanted to meet up sometime. I said yes, and then never followed through.

He hasn't texted me since January 4, 2020. Now, to be clear, I don't blame him for not reaching out more. My non-responding is what killed that friendship. I know, because it also killed every other friendship I had at the time. I don't know, alcohol addiction, deep depression and crippling paranoia may be a fair explanation to one day stop responding to any of your friends, but I still deeply regret those choices. If I were to make a relationships post today, it would be on how the fuck you word an apology after behavior like that, five years down the road. Sorry. I feel like this is starting to become a journal. I'm going to stop my reflections there. So, about my love. So, about my love, for my best friend, with some years of hindsight and therapy behind me, I don't think I was in love

with him. I think I was in love with the idea of him, and I think I was obsessed for sure, but looking back, I don't know. I genuinely don't know. I think a part of me really liked the fact that this was a person who so clearly wasn't interested in me, genuinely, if he was, that would shock me to find out. Because he spent two and a half years ignoring the in hindsight very obvious attempts I made to deepen the relationship. Some examples include, him saying he's waiting for the right person, me responding sometimes I feel like I already have. Do you ever feel like that? And him going, nah, I don't think so, me following that up with maybe you just don't know. The heart is weird sometimes in him going,

I'm pretty sure I'd know. One time we talked about why people fall in love, and I genuinely tried to convince him a deep friendship was all you needed. While he insisted that there needed to be a level of sexual attraction as well, I tried to get him to do that 36 questions that will make you fall in love thing with me, I kept trying to find excuses to hold his hand. Rest in peace, my palm reading career, you were nothing but a thinly veiled attempt at finger touching, and him resolutely never going along with it, ditto, but with hugs, arm touching, and sitting just a little too close whenever we went out so I could hear him better. which he normally responded to by going we should go outside so you can hear better if it's too loud in here. Very thoughtful, but very much not what the goal was. One night, when we were alone in my apartment after a club event, after a particularly long shared look, I asked him what he was thinking about and that kind of I don't want to break the illusion soft voice

you put on when you're really fucking close to someone you like. And his response was I don't know if I agreed that Gert's metaphor about blinking makes that much sense, actually, for context, we'd bickered about that earlier in the night, since we just read some article about it in class. I did not expect it to make a comeback at that point. Another night, when we were out together and there had been a lot of looks and closely leaned in laughing together, and he pulls me to one side by the hand to talk to me about something, heart racing. Only to ask me if I know if one of my friends is single because he thinks she's really fucking cute and might have been looking at him all night looking back. At least some of this stuff is

sort of funny. I have no idea if he knew or knows now that I was in love with him. I wouldn't be surprised if some of my old friends eventually told him, but of course he's never reached out about it. But yes, I think I kind of like the security of this person who clearly didn't like me back. Not that I was doing well with a heartache, but there's a certain kind of fucked up comfort that comes from pining for someone who doesn't want you back. Like, the highs I'd get when I got something that felt like confirmation made up for the lows of crying in my apartment stairway when I got home after a denial. Today, I mostly just feel so bad for him and ashamed of myself. Regardless of whether he knew or not, and I'm trying to cling to the fact that he seemed to at least

continue wanting to be friends as some indicator that he never felt creeped out or uncomfortable. My behavior was pretty fucking creepy. And in the end, once I did get that distance between us, the feelings went away after some six months or so. My therapist recommended not meeting this person again, for my own sake, and by early 2020 I wasn't so painfully in love anymore. A while later I'd end up meeting a guy I clicked with just as much, who actually liked me back and showed it. We've been together for almost three years now,

and are talking about starting to try for kids at some point soon. He'd like us to get married first, but is also insisting he wants to be the one to propose, so I'm just walking around waiting for the day. Even if it's not a huge surprise or secret, he just wants to get that moment of going down on one knee, and who am I to deny him? I'm slowly growing old and boring.

I'm sober, I go to my boring, stable, middle career nine, to five job, I save for my retirement and traveling on the summers. I help my dad out on his farm, I crochet little animals for my newborn niece. I come home to a man who plays his silly video, games, I play my silly video games, we go for walks into the museum and bicker about whether to get fat on takeout or not. I have some regrets about how my early 20s ended up playing out, but by God, I wouldn't want to go back. Next story, daughter wanted to live with her deadbeat bio mom who

abandoned her, so I cut off her college fund. A week later she discovered her mom stole $10,000 from her. Hello everyone. I'm a single dad to my 18-year-old daughter, and Emma. Her bio-mom left us when she was young, and I've raised her with the help of my wife, who has been a wonderful mother figure. Recently, Emma started reconnecting with her bio-mom, and I initially supported this, hoping it would be a positive experience. However, it quickly became apparent that her bio-mom hadn't changed. Emma began making excuses for her and started exhibiting increasingly hostile behavior toward my wife. She would say things like, maybe I'll just move in with my mom and leave you both behind, and you're not my real mom anyway, so what do you care?

It escalated to threats where she implied she would ruin our lives if we tried to stop her from pursuing this relationship. During a heated argument, Emma expressed her desire to move in with her bio mom. This was the breaking point for me. Feeling that I needed to set boundaries, I decided to cut off her college fund and told her she had to leave our home. Since then, my family has been vocal about their disapproval. They believe I should have been more understanding and that I overreacted. Some even argue that I'm pushing her further away and harming our relationship permanently. They think I should have tried harder to support her rather than resorting to such drastic measures. I'd have for taking this step, or was I justified in cutting her off?

Update 1, thanks to everyone who commented on my original post. I didn't expect to have an update so quickly, but a lot has happened in just the past few hours. About five hours after I posted, I got a message from Emma asking if we could meet up. She suggested a nearby coffee shop, and although I was unsure of what to expect, I agreed to meet her. When I arrived, I could tell right away that something was different. Emma looked exhausted and stressed, not at all like the confident person who left our home. She told me that her time with her biomomom had been a disaster. Not only had her mom treated her coldly, but she was a lot of her. She She also demanded an exorbitant amount of money for rent, far more than Emma could afford.

It became clear to Emma that her mom wasn't interested in having a real relationship with her, just in using her for financial gain. Emma was visibly upset as she apologized for the way she had treated me and my wife. She admitted that she'd made a huge mistake and asked if she could come back home. It was obvious she was genuinely remorseful, and she said she realized now how much we had done for her. I told her that I'm willing to work on rebuilding our relationship, but it's going to take time and effort on both sides. We discussed setting some boundaries and working through the issues that led to all of this in the first place. She agreed, and we left the coffee shop with a plan to move forward, one step at a time.

It's not going to be an easy road, but I'm hopeful that we can heal from this and come out stronger on the other side. I'm still processing everything, but I'm relieved that Emma wants to make things right. Update 2, Hey everyone, I've got another update, and things have gotten even more intense since my last post. A day after Emma and I reconciled, her bio mom showed up at our house. I didn't expect her to come here, but she was furious, screaming about how I had taken her daughter away and how I was trying to turn Emma against her. She was completely out of control, and it quickly became clear that she wasn't going to leave peacefully. I tried to calm her down, but nothing worked, so I had no. choice but to call the cops. When the police arrived, Emma was visibly shaken. As they escorted

her mom away, Emma asked me to press charges. She was done with her mom's manipulations and wanted to protect herself from any further harm. While we were dealing with the fallout, Emma mentioned that her bio mom had access to her credit card. We decided to check her account, and that's when we discovered something shocking. Her mom had taken out $10,000 without Emma's knowledge. We were both stunned and heartbroken. After reporting the theft to the police, we started doing some digging of our own. We found out that Emma's bio-mom was drowning in debt. She'd been using Emma as a financial lifeline, which explained the outrageous demands for rent and the recent theft.

She was desperate and willing to do anything to get her hands on more money. We provided all the evidence to the police, and they're now investigating her for fraud. Emma is devastated but also relieved that the truth is coming to light. We're working with the bank to try to recover the stolen money, and I've hired a lawyer to help us navigate the legal process. This whole situation has been incredibly tough on Emma, but she's been strong through it all. We're focusing on moving forward and rebuilding trust. I'm grateful that she came back home when she did because who knows how much worse things could have gotten if she'd stayed with her mom any longer. It's going to take time to heal from all of this, but we're on the right path now.

Emma knows she has our full support, and we're committed to helping her get through this. I'm just glad we caught on to what was happening before it was too late. Comments where Op on his wife's role in his daughter's life as a stepmom slash maternal figure. Oop, my wife has been her maternal figure ever since she was three so she has a say in it and also the bio mom has never raised a finger in raising. I raised her and always gave her what she wanted to a certain extent, though. Commenter one, Udi, you are in your feelings and not being understanding and apparent. You are upset because she's rejecting your wife. You are disregarding her feelings when she says you loved your wife more instead of asking why does she feel like that.

You may think your wife is this great person but she may not be to your daughter. You're protecting your wife because your daughter is rejecting her. Allow her space to navigate that relationship. W. her mom without you punishing her. Oop, I have seen firsthand how my wife treats my daughter. To be exact, she did all the work for my daughter as my wife is sterile and would help in holiday H.W. Maths and even hug her and my daughter would always praise her when I asked her if she had any problems with her comment or two.

Yes, you are being petty. She's an adult now and she wants to establish a relationship with her mom. For you to punish her for choices that have nothing to do with her college education is incredibly irresponsible and makes you just as bad as her mom. Oop, her mom abandoned her and never looked back until she was 18 obviously am compelled. Commenter 3. Just let her figure out that her bio mom is a piece of shit that's the best way to go about it. Update 3, September 24th, 2024. Hey everyone, I've got another update, and this one has been extremely difficult for our family. After we pressed charges and discovered the theft of

$10,000 from Emma's credit card, her bio-mom started harassing us nonstop. It started with constant phone calls and text messages, both to me and Emma, begging, demanding, and threatening us to drop the lawsuit. She even began showing up at our workplaces. At my office, she caused a scene, screaming at the receptionist to let her in, calling me a thief and claiming I was ruining her life. Emma's job wasn't spared either. Her bio mom went there too, embarrassing her in front of her co-workers and even threatening to expose personal details about our family if we didn't drop the charges. We tried to block her out, but things came to a head when she showed up at our house again. This time, she was even more out of control. She started screaming and calling my wife all kinds of vile names, including a nasty whore,

claiming she had stolen Emma from her. We tried to get her to leave, but she refused. And then it happened, she physically attacked my wife. She shoved her into a wall and started hitting and scratching her. Emma and I were in complete shock. My wife was just trying to defend herself, but her bio-mom kept coming at her. Seeing my wife terrified and hurt was my breaking point. I immediately called the cops. When the police arrived, they arrested her for assault.

My wife is now traumatized from the incident. She's been struggling with anxiety and can't sleep well, knowing that she was physically attacked in her own home. She's seeing a therapist to try to deal with the emotional scars left from this nightmare. Emma is devastated too. She never imagined her biomomom would go this far, and seeing her attack my wife has left her shaken. We're doing everything we can to support each other, but the impact has been immense. Now, with her biomomom in custody and facing multiple charges, including assault, and harassment, we're hoping we can finally find some peace.

It's hard to believe how far this situation has escalated, but I'm glad that, at least for now, we're safe from further harassment. We'll be taking legal steps to ensure a restraining order is in place moving forward. This has been a painful chapter for my family, but we're determined to get through it together. Thank you again for all your support during this time. It's been a lifeline for us. I hope you enjoy this story. encountered my partner's relatives following a prolonged courtship and sensed an air of unease due to their conduct. Subsequently, I learned that his former romantic partner had mysteriously disappeared without a single clue.

I, 29F, finally met my boyfriends, 34M, family last month after dating for three years. We've been living together in Chicago for the past year, but his hometown is eight hours away in rural Missouri. I've been asking to meet his family since our first anniversary, especially since he's met mine several times when they visited from Thailand. Every time I brought it up, he'd say stuff like they're just really private or they're old school and traditional or let's wait until we're more settled. Fair enough. Some families are weird about outsiders. Mind certainly has its quirks. Well, after three years together and me getting a permanent position at the hospital where I work as a physical therapist, we finally made the trip. And honestly, I don't know how to explain it except that

something felt seriously off the entire weekend. The moment we pulled into the driveway of his childhood home, I noticed his mom watching us from the window. Not a casual glance, she was full on staring, not moving, not waving, just staring. When we got out of the car, she suddenly burst through the front door and ran to us, arms outstretched. She threw herself at me, not my boyfriend, but me, and squeezed so hard I could barely breathe. Oh my goodness, you're even more beautiful than the pictures. Jason, you didn't tell me she was this gorgeous. Oh my, look at your skin, your hair. Perfect, just perfect. His mom kept touching me. Not in a perverted way, but constantly putting her hands on my shoulders, grabbing my hands when talking to me,

playing with my hair, and hugging me at random moments. She kept saying how perfect I was and how beautiful I looked. The first night, she literally pinched my cheeks like I was a toddler. She insisted on serving me food, piling my plate high even after I said I was full, and kept refilling my wine glass despite me saying I don't handle alcohol well. Nonsense. You need to relax around family, she'd say, pouring more wine into my glass when I went to the bathroom and came back. I started pretending to sip it and then dumping some in a plant when no one was looking. His dad barely acknowledged my existence. He'd nod when I spoke but never initiated conversation. Just sat there watching sports and occasionally whispering to my boyfriend

in the kitchen when they thought I wasn't paying attention. Twice, I walked into the kitchen and they immediately stopped talking. Their house was modestly sized, not tiny, but small enough that whispering in one room could sometimes be heard in another if you were paying attention. At dinner the first night, his mom served everyone else normal portions but gave me enough food for three people. When I said I couldn't possibly eat at all, she looked genuinely distressed and said, but I made all this specially for you. Jason told me what you like. The problem was, most of the dishes weren't things I particularly enjoyed. My boyfriend knows I don't like shellfish, but there was a huge shrimp dish in front of me. I told him multiple times I can't handle spicy food.

yet his mom kept insisting I try her famous Five alarm chili because Jason said you love spicy things. The questions from his mom were bizarre. What kind of wife do you plan to be? How committed are you to making relationships work? Do you believe in trying to fix things no matter what? She seemed intensely interested in my previous breakups, asking why I ended things with my ex and whether I fought hard enough to save that relationship. When you love someone, she said while gripping my wrist,

at one point, you never give up on them. Ever. No matter what happens. Families stick together through everything. That's what separates real love from fake love. His younger sister Rebecca kept giving me strange looks throughout dinner. She was maybe 25, lived at home, and barely spoke except to answer direct questions. When I asked what she did for work, she glanced at her mom before saying, I help around the house mostly. The entire weekend felt like some weird audition. My boyfriend, who's usually talkative and engaging, barely said three words. Just sat there with this strange smile, looking down whenever I tried to make eye contact. When we went to bed that first night in the guest room, I asked him if everything was okay, and he just said, they really like you.

That's good. The next morning, his mom insisted on making me breakfast. even though I explained I usually just have coffee. She made a massive spread, pancakes, eggs, bacon, waffles, fruit, and watched me intently as I ate. Every time I put my fork down, she'd urged me to eat more. Growing girls need their strength, she said, which was weird since I'm 29 and definitely not growing anymore. After breakfast, she suggested we look at family photos. For two hours, she showed me album after album, but strangely.

there were very few pictures of my boyfriend as a teenager or young adult. Lots of childhood photos up to about age 12, then almost nothing until recent years. When I mentioned this, she quickly changed the subject and pulled out a different album entirely. During lunch, his mom asked if I wanted children. Before I could answer, she started describing how she'd always wanted a large family and was disappointed Jason was taking so long to give her grandchildren. My boyfriend stared at his plate during this entire conversation. That afternoon, his dad finally spoke directly to me.

He cornered me while I was looking at books in their living room and said, Jason tells me you're a permanent resident now. When I explained I was on a work visa, he nodded and said, Tough process. Be a shame if anything went wrong with that. Then he smiled and walked away. On the second night, I pulled my boyfriend aside and told him I wasn't feeling great and wanted to head back to Chicago early. When he asked why, I said maybe I wasn't

used to how his family socialized, and that his mom was just really, really intense. I wasn't trying to be ungrateful. They prepared lots of food and given us their guest room, but something just felt wrong. He completely lost his shit. Called me judgmental, culturally insensitive, and ungrateful when his family had bent over backward to welcome me. I apologized and said I was just overweight. but he refused to discuss it further. That night, I overheard his parents talking in the kitchen after they thought we'd gone to bed. I couldn't make out everything, but I heard his mom say, she's perfect if she just learns to adjust and his dad responding with, not like the other one. The eight-hour drive back to Chicago the next day was silent. He turned up the radio whenever I tried

to talk. When I asked if we could please discuss what happened, he said, there's nothing to discuss. You insulted my family after they welcomed you with open arms. That was a week ago. He's barely spoken ten words to me since. Meanwhile, his mom has texted me constantly, how wonderful it was meeting me, how she can't wait to see me again, how she hopes will give her grandchildren soon, which is weird since we've never even discussed marriage. She sent me at least 20 messages, often late at night, with specific questions about when we

might visit again. After three days of silent treatment, I tried apologizing again. He just grunted and walked out of the room. I went to work, came home, and found he'd moved his pillow and blanket to the couch. He didn't come to bed at all that night. Last night I cooked his favorite meal as a peace offering. He took one bite, said he wasn't hungry, and went to bed at 7 p.m. The rest of the food sat untouched.

I wrapped it up and put it in the fridge. but this morning, I noticed he'd thrown it all away. Vita here? Did I just screw everything up by being ungrateful? Should I have just kept my mouth shut about getting weird vibes? Edit, he's still not talking to me. It's been nine days. He sleeps on the couch and leaves for work before I wake up.

I've tried everything, apologizing, making his favorite foods, suggesting we talk to a third party. Nothing. Just cold. silence or one-word answers. Last night I asked if he wanted to break up, and he just shrugged and went back to watching TV. What the fuck am I supposed to do now? Hash Update 1, holy shit. My previous post blew up overnight and I couldn't keep up with all the comments. Thanks for the advice, even the harsh stuff. After another day of silent treatment, I cornered my boyfriend when he got

home from his job and insisted we talk. I blocked the doorway to the living room and said, we need to sort this out right now. I can't live like this anymore. I apologized again for how I came across about his family and asked if we could please move past this. His reaction was not what I expected. He shoved past me, not violently, but firmly enough that I had to step aside, and threw his work boots across the room. He turned to me with a face I'd never seen before. He exploded, saying my reaction to his family showed exactly why he'd been protecting them from me for so long. Then he dropped the bomb that I should be fucking grateful that he brought me to America

and that my entire life here depends on him. For context, we met in Thailand when he was teaching English at the language center where I worked as an administrator. I had already applied to graduate programs in the U.S. before meeting him. My English was already fluent, it's required in my field. I came on a student visa, which later converted to a work visa when the hospital hired me. While he helped me navigate some paperwork, I earned my own way here. My salary as a physical therapist is actually higher than what he makes.

When I pointed this out, that I had my own visa, my own job, and had been planning to come to the U.S. even before we met, he shifted tactics and accused me of cheating on him. Said the only reason I'd find his perfect family uncomfortable was if I was trying to sabotage our relationship so I could run off with someone else. Who is it? That doctor you're always talking about? Or your friend Mike from the gym? I'm not stupid, I see the way you're always on your phone, smiling at messages. The doctor he mentioned is a 65-year-old man who supervises my department. Mike is a gay client I've been helping recover from knee surgery.

I wasn't smiling at messages, I was watching physical therapy technique videos on YouTube. He demanded to see my phone. I handed it over because I had to be. have nothing to hide. He spent an hour going through my texts, emails, photos, search history, everything. Found nothing, obviously. No inappropriate messages, no secret conversations, no hidden apps. Instead of apologizing, he said he needed to reevaluate our entire relationship and stormed out. I heard his car screech out of the parking lot. He came back at 2 a.m., reeking of beer and slept on the couch again. The next morning before work, he said his family was willing to

give me another chance if I behaved better next time, and that no one else in America would put up with an ungrateful bitch like you. He said I should be on my knees thanking him for not kicking me out. I stood there like an idiot, watching him leave for work. My hands were shaking so badly I dropped my coffee mug and it shattered on the kitchen floor. While cleaning up the pieces, I realized I'd never seen this side of him before. In three years, he'd raised his voice maybe twice, during normal arguments couples have. Never anything like this. That's when I did something I should have done days ago, I googled him. The first few results were normal. But then I found articles from six years ago in the Missouri Herald. Turns out, his previous girlfriend vanished.

Completely disappeared one night after leaving work. Her car was found at a highway rest stop 30 miles outside their hometown. Local news articles showed he was investigated as a person of interest. They'd been dating for four years. The case went cold after a few months. Nobody was found. No charges filed. But he'd never mentioned this girlfriend at all.

He told me he'd only had casual relationships before me, nothing serious, just wasn't ready to settle down before you came along. I called my friend Kayla from work, and she came over immediately. I was sitting on the bathroom floor when she arrived, still clutching my phone with the news articles on the screen. She read the articles, then helped me pack essentials while I contacted my parents. They wired me emergency money through Western Union. Get out now, my dad said on the phone. Don't wait another minute.

I left before he returned from work. checked into a hotel 50 miles away under Kayla's name, turned off location services on my phone, left my laptop behind because it was company property and I wasn't thinking straight. Within an hour, he started texting. Where are you? Why did you leave? What's wrong? At first, the messages seemed concerned. I sent him screenshots of the news articles and asked why he lied about his past. The text quickly turned nasty, you ungrateful cunt. Nobody will ever want you like I do. You're making a huge fucking mistake. You'll regret this. After everything I did for you, this is how you repay me? Then came the threats, your visa won't be valid if I report what you did. I did nothing wrong and my visa

doesn't depend on him. I know where your parents live. I paid for everything you have, completely untrue. Then his mom started calling. Multiple times. Left voicemail saying her son was misunderstood and had nothing to do with that terrible business and that if we just settled down and started a family everything would smooth out. Melissa was troubled, she said in one message. Always making up stories, always threatening to leave. Not stable like you. You're perfect for Jason. You can heal our family. Please come back. We can work through this misunderstanding. I blocked both their numbers. Called the hospital and spoke to my supervisor, explaining I needed emergency leave for a personal crisis. She was understanding and approved two weeks. That night, I barely slept. Every noise in the

hotel corridor made me jump. The next day, Kayla drove me to the airport. I'm flying back to Thailand tomorrow. Most of my stuff is still at the apartment, but it's just stuff. My parents are wiring money for immediate needs, and I've already contacted an immigration attorney about my visa status. I don't know if he had anything to do with his ex's disappearance. That's for the police to figure out. But I know he lied about something massive, his family gives off serious creep vibes, and the way he flipped from loving boyfriend to threatening asshole in the span of a week tells me everything I need to know. Thanks to everyone who commented on my original post. Without your input, I might have kept trying to fix things until it was too late. Update 2. It's been three months since I fled

Chicago and returned to Thailand. A lot has happened, so I'll try to cover the important parts. First, I'm safe. I'm staying with my parents in Thailand while sorting out my next steps. I initially planned to just take a short break, maybe find a job in another U.S. city, but after weeks of harassment, I decided staying in Thailand made more sense for now. Technically, with my level of qualification as a physical therapist, I could have found another employer in the U.S. willing to sponsor my visa. But I'd need to deal with a new petition, potential gaps in status, and the uncertainty of approval. My immigration attorney said that while it was certainly possible, the process would be stressful even, even. under normal circumstances. He warned that someone this vindictive might try to interfere with any new visa process or employment verification. The last thing I needed was to be dealing with

USCIS complications while also looking over my shoulder constantly. The threats my ex made about knowing where to find me in the U.S. really scared me. So I had to officially resign from my position at the hospital. My boss was incredibly understanding about the situation. I explained everything in a long phone call. She provided Abbott of a reference letter that's already helped me secure interviews at international hospitals in Bangkok. Next week, I have a final interview with a rehabilitation center that specializes in treating tourists who've been injured while traveling. It's not ideal, but I'm making the best of the situation. The day after I arrived in Thailand, my boyfriend, now ex, emailed from a new address. He apologized for overreacting and begged me to come back.

said his family really liked me and were confused by my sudden departure. Said I misunderstood the articles I found, that his ex had mental health issues and likely ran away, and that the police cleared him completely. No actual explanation for why he lied about her existence for three years. I didn't respond. Three days later, another email arrived with flight information. He'd purchased a ticket to Bangkok for the following week. Said he was coming to bring me home and sort things out in person.

said he'd already contacted the U.S. Embassy to help straighten out any visa misunderstandings. The email ended with you don't need to reply. I'll see you soon. I immediately contacted the Thai police and the U.S. Embassy. The embassy staff were surprisingly helpful, taking down all the information and placing notes in their system. They confirmed my visa status was completely independent of him and suggested I file a report with local authorities. I also filed a report with the local police, who promised to watch for him at immigration checkpoints. The officer I spoke with took copies of his threats and the news articles. He never showed up. Either he couldn't get a visa on short notice or someone talked sense into him. Either way, the ticket went and used.

A week after he was supposed to arrive, I received another email just saying this isn't over. His mother continued trying to reach me through different channels, creating new email addresses, reaching out to former coworkers, even contacting my parents through their website. Always with the same message, her son was innocent, I was making a terrible mistake, we belonged together, she'd always wanted a daughter just like me. She even sent an email to my old supervisor saying I'd had a mental breakdown and needed to be brought home for treatment. Thankfully, my boss recognized this as harassment and forwarded it.

everything to me. I blocked every new contact attempt and warned friends and family to do the same. My parents installed security cameras around their house as a precaution. Two weeks after I left, police officers showed up at my parents' house. Apparently, my ex had filed a missing person's report claiming I disappeared under suspicious circumstances and might be in danger. The report suggested I might be suffering from delusions and had fabricated stories about his past before vanishing. The officers were confused when I opened the door myself and explained the situation. I showed them our text exchanges and the news articles about his previous girlfriend. They took notes and left, assuring me they'd update the international database to show I was safe and had left the U.S. voluntarily.

Meanwhile, I've been picking up the pieces of my life. My parents helped me retrieve most of my documents and financial information, though some personal items remain in Chicago. A friend helped me deal with a joint bank. bank account, thankfully containing only a small emergency fund, and my cell phone contract. I found out my ex tried to access my medical records at the hospital where I worked. The compliance officer contacted me after flagging his attempt as unauthorized. He'd shown up claiming to be my husband and saying he needed my records for an insurance claim. My former apartment manager emailed to say he'd finally move my things out of the apartment.

Apparently, he'd kept paying rent for two months after I left, telling neighbors I was visiting family and would be back soon. When he finally moved out, he left behind most of my clothes and books but took all my photos and personal mementos. Some people have asked why I didn't go to the police immediately after finding those articles. Honestly, I was scared and confused. Nothing overtly threatening had happened yet. He hadn't hit me or explicitly threatened me. I just felt unsafe in a way I couldn't fully articulate. My instincts were screaming to get out first, soared through the details later.

Now I understand that was my subconscious processing danger signals my conscious mind hadn't fully registered. I don't know if my ex had anything to do with his previous girlfriend's disappearance. I hope the authorities figure that out. What I do know is that I escaped a situation that was rapidly deteriorating, where multiple red flags were waving, and where both he and his family showed deeply troubling behavior. To those who commented on my original post saying I was overreacting to a family that was just being nice fuck you.

Sometimes your gut knows something's wrong before your brain can articulate why. I'm alive because I listened to that feeling. To those who encouraged me to take the sign seriously and get out, thank you. Your words might have saved my life. I hope you enjoy this story. I was shocked when my spouse's sibling unexpectedly revealed his hidden emotions for me following his partner discovered her bridal gown. It appears he was simply stressed about getting married. I'm fairly surprised. Overwhelmed so I'll start with some background. I have been with my husband for five years, we've been married for two. Since early on in the relationship, I've been great friends with his older brother, partially because I always wanted one. When he started dating a girl about two years ago, I went out of my way to make sure she knew she had a friend in me if she wanted since we're the only girls in the family. We're great friends now and since they got engaged three months ago, I've been helping with wedding planning and was asked to be a bridesmaid.

We went dress shopping today and had a blast. We went to brunch, had some mimosas, found the dress, and went back to their house to celebrate. I ended up alone in the kitchen with my brother-in-law a bit after being there and he said he just had to tell me something before it kept eating at him. I was a little buzzed and confused but was not at all expecting him to say what he did. I think I've had feelings for you for a few years and I've never been able to tell you if you ever felt the same I completely froze and just shook my head. I told him that no, I have never thought about him in any way other than a friend than a brother and I never would. Before he said anything else I bolted back to his fiancé and the other girls there and very discreetly told her I got my period and wasn't feeling well and would if someone come get me and then come by soon for more wedding planning. She thought nothing of it and I called my best friend to come get me. She dropped me off at home, my husband is working right now and there is no question that I'm going to tell him as soon as he gets home.

But I just have no idea where to go from there. Do I tell his fiancé? Do I make him tell her? Do I leave it? Do I have my husband talk to him? Has anyone ever had something like this happen or have any advice? Anything is appreciated. Update 1, January 4th, 2025. Thanks to everyone who helped calm my panicked mind after my original post. I didn't want to tell me husband we need to talk while he was still at work and make him panic so having some reassurance from here was really helpful. I also noticed a lot of people asking for an update, so here is one that even I was shocked by as I lived it. It's not exactly the earth-shattering blow-up most people thought it would be. My husband came home and he immediately knew I had something on my mind.

I explained the whole thing and he was livid at his brother. Thankfully he gave me a hug and I broke down crying from the stress. He assured me I did everything right and it wasn't my fault. After that, he went to call his brother and tell him that he knew what happened and wanted to talk to him one-on-one. Well, it turns out that his brother and fiancé were already on their way to our house to talk about it. As soon as the other girls left, not long after me, my bill confessed everything to her. First she slapped him, deserved. But after they talked and he promised her that his feelings for her were genuine, she said that he needed to apologize to me and his brother and then they could go from there.

So they came over and he and my husband went and talked, while I talked with his fiancé. We both cried and talked for about an hour. I promised her I never had any feelings for him and had no idea he ever. had any for me. Apparently she had caught him gazing at me on a family vacation once and thought maybe he had some attraction to me so while this sucked, she felt some relief that she wasn't crazy for thinking it. He admitted she was right and thinks his feelings at one point were out of jealousy that his younger brother was further in life than him, and he attributed that to me in a way. This was new to him as the older brother and they really hadn't compared each other much growing up

just because they had vastly different paths, it was little apples to oranges. But now, Now there was some perceived competition on a similar playing field. The feelings had faded but when she came home saying she found a dress he felt an urge to come clean and he wished he had said it differently or worked through it with some help before to actually understand what the feelings were before making this whole mess. I don't know about all that, but I guess I could understand it with a more clear head. I mean if the Oedipus complex can be a thing then I can see him having some complex feelings that manifested his attraction, but didn't affect his love for his fiancée.

This all happened in one night and he was visibly distressed over it, so I'd find it hard to believe he could weave a whole story like that, so I'm inclined to believe him. Once my husband and his brother came back to the living room, my bill looked like a puppy who just got in trouble. Also looked a little roughed up, but I didn't question it. We all talked, and he apologized to me for putting me in this position. Where it landed, their wedding is on hold privately while they figure out next steps. Thankfully there was nothing booked and no date sent out. We had gone wedding dress shopping just to get an idea and it was just luck that she fell in love with the dress. They are going to go to couples therapy to decide if and how they can move past this. There is clear love between the two.

Things will be tense, but I think he feels genuine remorse and my potential sill says she holds no ill will against me and if they move forward, she'd still love to have me as a bridesmaid if I'm willing. My husband and his brother have some serious work to do on their relationship and my friendship with my bill will never be the same again but we'll see what happens from here. We've also agreed to keep this between the four of us. But they will be honest that they're doing some premarital counseling before setting dates or full on planning. I saw a lot of comments telling me to keep my mouth shut and no harm was done. While I guess I can see your point, I just couldn't imagine keeping something like this from my husband. especially if it came out later, and he found out I withheld it.

Trust is huge in our partnership and even just a mission feels like a betrayal of that. Sure I knew this could blow up if I let it out, but it would be my bill's fault, not mine. He had all control over telling me what he did. Thanks to everyone who helped me through that scary processing time alone. Update 2, January 5, 2025. I wanted to address a couple common responses I've been seen. seeing here and give another next day update. To everyone telling me to not tell anyone, or give him a mulligan, that was never an option to me. My husband and I are a team and we don't keep secrets,

only surprises. It's something we agreed on before getting married. If I didn't tell him and it came out later, it's a good as me lying to his face. I did nothing wrong and I know my husband would stand by me, so that just wasn't an option I was willing to consider. To all the claims that I'd be blowing up multiple families, I'm not the one who confessed feelings. He opened this can of worms and it's not my responsibility to keep this secret. If this does blow up his relationship or his family, that's all on him. Not me. There were a lot of other common themes in here, but those two were very prevalent and I wanted to dispel them. So for this small update, my husband actually called his brother today and asked if he wanted to go to one of their favorite bars to watch the game together today,

something pretty common for them or all four of us to do, before all this. My bill was shocked, but agreed. Shortly after, his fiancé called me and asked if she could come over while they were gone. She was honest and said it might be awkward, but we would do this a lot and either do some DIY together, get a puzzle out, or watch movies together. She wanted to see if I'd be open to keeping this up as long as we were both comfortable with it while they work their things out so our relationship doesn't deteriorate. It meant the world to me and I said of course.

All four of us agreed that they, Bill and fiancé, would start seeing a couple's therapist ASAP, and my Bill would see one on his own. Until they get a better grasp on what his feelings were Slash are in their own plan, we won't get all four of us together in Bill and I will not be alone together. My potential sill is one of the most level-headed people I've ever met, and so kind-hearted. My bill used to have a lot of walls up that she broke down pretty naturally and this, this is so out of character for him. His proposal to her was so well planned and thoughtful and tailored to her down to the smallest detail. He picked her a new outfit, had the perfect

ring, even the blanket at the setting was her favorite color, a detail he did intentionally, and he had even arranged to have her parents there who live hours away. It's clear that he loves her. And I truly don't think that even if I did say yes, he would not leave her to be with me. Not that it would have been an option. I truly don't. truly see a road forward for them and all of us. We're all committed to finding the best outcome for everyone involved. My marriage is solid, and we have our marriage maintenance couples therapy appointment coming up soon anyway, so we'll check in with an outside opinion but I'm not worried. They are going to a consult with a therapist at the same practice in just a couple days.

It obviously won't be a quick and smooth fix, as this was fucked up, but I'm much more optimistic than many comments here and wanted to share. Update 3, January 26, 2025. Hi everyone. I wanted to share a final update as I'm still getting notifications from them. For some context, I am 27F, my husband is 28m, Bill is 32m, and his fiancé is 29F. This started as a throwaway account but now it's just an anonymous account, and this will likely be my last regarding this story. Since this happened we have talked and my bill has explained some of his feelings as he has understood so far thanks to a lot of introspection and therapy. The silver lining to all of this is that he is spending some much needed time working through his feelings

and coping mechanisms. He group texted me and my husband and asked if we could talk together. It was mostly to talk to me, but he didn't want there to be any gray area going forward. To sum it up, he very sincerely apologized to me for the position he put me in and to both of us for the betrayal of our relationships. After a couple therapy sessions talking through his root feelings, he realized how terrified of change he was, even when it was good, and frankly his fear of a failed marriage. He was older and understood so much more of his parents divorced than my husband and he didn't realize how much that impacted him because he had pushed it down so deep. My husband and I had met before my bill met his fiancé and in the

early days, he had an attraction to me. But he pushed these feelings away. because obviously, I was with his brother. When he found his fiancé he truly fell in love with her, and we all knew it by the way he acted. I mean this guy is usually stubborn and stoic, but he just melted for her. He changed so many habits, for the better, for her sake and for his future.

Nobody questioned if he loved her and he was so excited to propose, albeit he knew he was nervous for the life change. When we went out dress shopping and came back, a little tipsy and excited. she just gushed to him about wedding details and ideas and he got overwhelmed. So he did a couple shots, not saying it was a good choice, but it's the one he made, and when I came out, as a person he had come to for comfort or advice on more than one occasion,

he just exploded and said what he said. He had so many thoughts running through his head and I can't say I'm that mad at him for what happened. When I got engaged, no matter how much I loved my husband and how great our marriage is now, I have to admit I had a few late-night musings about what life would be like married because it should not be taken lightly. He was so genuine in his apology and ashamed of his thoughts and actions, he was damn near in tears. When his brother hugged him, he lost it. I gave him a hug as well and he couldn't stop, thanking us for not just telling him to F off. His fiancé joined us after our talk and she said that while she's still struggling with trusting him and they aren't going to get married on the same timeline they were planning, she's not

leaving him as long as he continues to work on his feelings and unpacks his emotions around marriage. They go to couples therapy and both go individually as well and I think we all see a road forward, knowing it will not be easy. In my past posts, there were so many people who thought my bill was making it up to get out of it, and he would have a thrown away his relationship for me. Call me crazy or naive, but I don't see it that way and nobody else involved us either. We addressed the possibility and dismissed it. I appreciate the level of care people have shown for me in my future sill, and we will continue to show care for her and my bill as they navigate this together.

Next story, baby sat all my grandkids but refused to keep watching my stepdaughters I had a very serious baby after her boyfriend called me unsafe, made me sign rules, and was super rude for months. I did a work program with the local clerk of court's office when I was in high school. They hired me when I graduated, and I had my 30 service years before I turned 50. With 30 service years you can get your full pension at any age. I worked until my first grandchild was born, then I retired to be grandma daycare. I have five grands' eight male for my stepson, seven male for my son, five female and 18-month

male for my daughter. I babysat all of them with no issues or complaints. I still keep the 18-month-old Monday to Friday and the older one's summer and school holidays. My stepdaughter and her boyfriend has been non-stop drama since before the baby was born. When she was 10 weeks pregnant, they presented a three-page list of rules for when I was babysitting. They said if I didn't sign it, they wouldn't allow me to babysit. I said that I understood their need to do what was best for their baby and I assured them that there would be no hurt feelings on my end when they made other child care arrangements.

Some of the rules were almost understandable, but most were downright ridiculous, and none of it was going to work for me. I don't remember them all but some examples are, I can't take the baby anywhere without their permission. I can't watch more than one additional child while babysitting. I can't cook. I had to provide the full name, dob and address of any potential visitors ahead of time for their approval of the person being around their child. They have to know any time I have a guest over and know who it is and how long they stay. My nine-year-old cat would have to be kept out of rooms where the baby would be, even when the baby wasn't there. I couldn't get another pet without their agreement.

When she was seven months along, they came back with revised rules in an attempt to compromise. I again let them know that their expectations were not going to fit with my life and they should just find other child care. Two days after my stepdaughter went back to work, she called and asked if I could keep calling the next day. I agreed but made it clear that I was going to provide safe. appropriate care according to my judgment and I wasn't going to deal with complaints or whatever that I was violating because I wanted it very clear that I was not agreeing to any of that. My stepdaughter was okay on the days she picked Cullen up and dropped him off.

I felt like she was interrogating me every time she picked him up, but it was tolerable, but her boyfriend was downright rude. I got to the point where I actually spent Sunday dreading the start of the week because of dealing with both of them, but especially his behavior. At minimum he'd pick up Cullen, make a big deal of partially undress him, make at least one snide comment about my cat or if I had any grandchild over besides the 18-month or if I had cooked or whatever. Then he'd say, I guess we don't have any choice but to put up with this for now. Or I guess you're happy that you won. This went on for four months. I spoke to my stepdaughter

several times about it and told her that obviously they are very unhappy with how I cared for Cullen and that they should really work on finding something else and that in the meantime he needed to be less vocal about it. It would get better for a day or two, and then he'd start again. It all came to a head as Thanksgiving was approaching. He was very verbal about the fact that he didn't want me to keep all my grandchildren over the break.

I made it very clear that there would be a couple of days that I had all of them and that they needed to make other arrangements if they had a problem. They didn't make other arrangements and when he picked Cullen up on the first day that I had all my grands, He was very rude and although nothing happened, everyone was happy, clean, fed, had a great day he said, to Cullen, that he was sorry that they had no choice except to leave him in an unsafe situation to be neglected. I called my stepdaughter that night, relayed to her what was said and told her that she had two weeks to make other arrangements and that she needed to drop off and pick up Cullen during those two weeks and if her boyfriend came to drop him off I would refuse to keep him and if he picked him up I would not keep him again. So things were better only dealing with her.

At some point she asked me if I would keep him until January because they found someone but he couldn't start until then. I agreed. She picked Cullen up and dropped him off everything was fine. New Year's Day several people sent me a screenshot of a post her boyfriend made on social media about how thankful he was that they were finally able to leave Cullen without worrying about his safety or him being neglected. He didn't outright name me or accuse me of anything specific but anyone who knows us knows I was keeping him in the post implied plenty. I was just happy that it was over. Friday she called me and said that their new child care provider had told her that Cullen wasn't a good fit and that she couldn't bring him back Monday.

She asked if I would start keeping him again. I told her that I was sorry for their situation, but I really don't feel comfortable keeping him. My husband and stepson both think I should watch Cullen under the agreement that Amanda drop him off and pick him up because they think her boyfriend is the big problem and that I should just do it for Cullen's sake. My stepson also commented that I'd probably be more willing to let it go if it had been a conflict with my daughter's husband. My pension is about $4,000 per month plus continuation of my health insurance. That's about 40% of our take-home income if that matters. Ida for refusing to start watching Cullen again? Update, January 7th, 2025.

First let me just address the common suggestion that Amanda's boyfriend is purposely sabotaging their child care to trap her. at home. They make roughly the same amount of money and definitely can't afford to lose half their income. I seriously doubt he wants her to stay home. Second, I would never tell my stepson to find someone else to watch his child because of a simple difference of opinion. My grandson and I have a very close bond. He's the oldest and it would break my heart and his if he didn't come spend his holidays and summers with me. Plus he's a huge help with the little ones when I have them all and things get hectic. I would never be so petty as to make him, and all my other grandchildren, suffer because of an adult disagreement. So I sort of asked around about why they were dropped

by their new sitter so quickly. Apparently they weren't. Amanda picked Cullen up and dropped him off both days he went and everything was lovely. He did cry quite a bit, but they expected that to get better as he adjusted to not being held as much. My husband and stepson talked to Amanda and she said that they realized that they can't afford daycare. They already made the easy changes, packing a lunch, giving up fancy coffee, etc., and his dad and her mom are both giving them about $100 per month towards child care and they can barely afford it. But they didn't realize that you have to send everything the baby needs. I buy diapers, wipes, formula, bottles, extra clothes, etc. They just hand me the baby. They didn't realize that daycare didn't cover all that.

Also, imagine her boyfriend surprise when he found out what the staffing rates are in this very expensive daycare. One adult cares for five infants. I guess he thought that someone would provide one-on-one care, diapers, wipes and formula for $350 per week. My stepson relayed their almost apology. They felt overwhelmed by an infant and couldn't imagine that someone else could manage that plus other things. Cullen is going back to daycare tomorrow. Cullen's dad is selling his dirt bike and Amanda is selling some designer clothes, handbags, and shoes to cover the cost. It'll get easier for them in six months when he transfers to the one-year-old class, which is a little cheaper.

I hope you enjoy this story. Cover the expenses for my mother's long-awaited trip as a gesture of gratitude for all the years she dedicated to raising me on her own. Unfortunately, she decided to bring along her impolite relatives and insisted that I bunk with the children. ditched them there. I, 29F, recently got promoted and with it came a significant raise so I asked my mother, 52F, if she'd like to take a vacation with me to Greece. My mother was pretty much my best friend while growing up because I didn't have a dad. My father passed away from a terminal illness about two or three years after my birth and I barely have any memories of him. It was mainly my mother who took care of me and raised me along with a little help from my grandparents. As a single mom, it was tough for her, but she never made me feel like I was a burden on her and I'll always be grateful for that.

So when I received this promotion, my very first thought was to take a holiday with my mother to repay her for whatever she'd done. I could have asked my friends to come along but I didn't, because that's how much my mother meant to me. However, as soon as I asked her if she wanted to come along, she told me that she'd accompany me but only if she'd be able to bring her husband and stepkids along with her as well. For context, my mother married her current husband, 49M, three years ago after being in a relationship for two years with him. I had no idea that she was dating this man and neither did anyone else, including her own parents. She sprung it on us with the news of her engagement and we barely had any time to adjust to this when she told us about her relationship because by then, they were already engaged to be married and within six months, they got married too. My stepdad wasn't an

unpleasant guy, but I just never got along with him for some reason. Maybe it was the fact that now he and his kids were suddenly my mother's first priority, or maybe he just never made an effort to connect with me or my grandparents, but for whatever reason, we just didn't get along well, and whenever I'd visit my mother, we'd avoid talking to each other as much as possible. He also happens to have two kids from his previous marriage and they're both in their teens. The oldest is a 16-year-old girl and the younger one is a 14-year-old boy. I don't know for sure why his ex-wife left him but as far as my mother is concerned, his divorce took place because his ex-wife was a conniving and selfish B-word who didn't care about

him or the kids, which is why she doesn't have custody of them anymore. She hasn't elaborated further and I haven't asked her about it either because it doesn't concern me. My stepdad had been married for six years and had been divorced for almost two years when he finally met my mother and decided to be with her. All of them seemed to be quite together so I didn't question my mother about her decision to want to include her family. Of course, it'd be a lot of hassle and expenditure to book four flight tickets instead of two and two hotel rooms instead of one. And I'd probably not be able to spend as much time with my mother as I'd thought I would,

but I was fine with all of that because the purpose of this trip was to make my mother happy and sort of repay her for everything that she'd done for me throughout my childhood. So after a few days, I agreed to let her bring her family along. Luckily, I could afford that easily since I can afford to splurge a little after the raise. After almost two weeks of planning, we finally boarded our flights and landed in Athens last afternoon. We were all jet-lagged and tried to catch some sleep in the afternoon here and at the time, the kids napped in my room while my mother and stepdad took the one beside ours. I was surprised that the kids had chosen to crash in my room because I'd expected my mother to share a room with her family,

but I didn't say anything since I'd assumed that this was just for the sake of convenience and once they woke up, they'd moved to the other room. Even after we were all done napping, they didn't move but I didn't mind because all of us went out to have a look around locally yesterday. We then came back to the hotel and the kids headed straight to my room, which is when I decided to talk to my mother and stepdad about it. I pulled them aside in the lobby and told them that I thought it was about time the kids switched rooms and they needed to say something to them.

But my stepdad just laughed in my face and told me that if I wanted to give my mother a vacation that bad, then I should have also taken into consideration that she'd need babysitting services as well. He said it while laughing too, as if it was a hilarious joke. I didn't understand what he was talking about and so he explained that since this was a vacation that I'd organized for my mom, so she could have some time off from her day-to-day exhausting life. Then the least I could do for her was look after the kids and let them share a room with me. Then, both of them smiled at me, thanked me, and left me speechless in the lobby. I was already doing the least I could do by taking her on vacation with me.

How many kids would do that for their parents in this day and age? And honestly, I was doing the most I could because I was putting up with her family even though I'd only wanted to take her with me. And on top of that, I was the one paying for everything so for them to expect me to babysit their kids as well was just ridiculous. If she'd wanted a break then she should have just left them all at home and come with me by herself like I'd planned for her too. So after a while, I went up to their room and tried to talk some sense into them again, but once more, my stepdad intervened and this time he was a lot less sweet about it. He told me point blank that I had to share the room with the kids because they'd earned this break and then, he shut the door right in my face before I could even say anything.

And the best part was that my mom didn't even say anything to him even though he was being extremely. extremely disrespectful and rude towards me. It was also ridiculous that he believed that they'd earned this break when it was actually I who had earned that promotion and the raise that had led to them being on this trip at all. And instead of being grateful for whatever I'd done, they had the audacity to be so disrespectful towards me. I was fuming when I got back to my room and saw the kids on the bed beside mine. I thought I'd try a different tactic and I asked them if they'd be willing to shift to the other

room, hoping that they'd say yes, but they didn't. They told me that their parents had told them to stay in whichever room I'd be in and that's why they'd taken it for granted that they'd be sharing a room with me. I didn't say anything to them because it wasn't their fault that their dad was being a jerk. So I let them be and thought about what to do next for the next couple of hours until at around 10 in the night. When I realized that the kids had fallen asleep, I'd thought about it long and hard and I realized that the only way out for me right now was to just leave without notifying any of them and leave them on their own. They'd been really disrespectful and selfish and there was just no way that my stepdad was going to boss me around on a vacation that I was paying for. I didn't think twice about it and before I knew it, I grabbed all my bags and had made a run for it. I hadn't unpacked yet so that was easy for me and the hotel staff didn't care much either since I'd told them that I was checking out and that the rooms would be paid for by my mother and stepdad.

It was a little past midnight but after searching for a while, I found another hotel a little distance away from the one I was. in. I was lucky enough to get an Uber without waiting for long and within half an hour, I'd checked into the other hotel which was better than the previous one because now that I'd managed to get rid of my mom and her I could finally afford to spend all that money on myself. I had a good night's sleep and the first thing that I did this morning was book myself a full body massage at the hotel spa to put myself at ease and fully be able to enjoy the vacation that I'd intended to have after several months of working myself to the bone for this promotion. I'd already blocked my stepdad and mother the night before, so I wasn't too worried about hearing from them and there was no way they'd be able to find out where I was.

I was having the time of my life so far, but that was only until a couple of hours ago when, at lunch, I finally heard from my mother. She'd made a fake account on Instagram to get through to me and had sent me a message about how I was being cruel to all of them, especially her. She said that abandoning my family wasn't the way to go and if I'd really felt so offended by the events of the people, previous night, then I should have waited until the morning to confront them and discuss this like a family until we came to a conclusion that everyone would be pleased with. But instead, I chose to abandon them in a strange country knowing that they didn't have any money on them at the moment since their cards wouldn't work internationally and the hotel staff was already hounding them for money since they'd been talking about checking out once they discovered that I'd left in the middle of the night

without telling. Any of them anything about it. So essentially, they didn't have any money and would soon be thrown out of the hotel as well if they couldn't confirm that they'd pay for the room since I transferred the rooms to them instead before I left so I couldn't be held responsible if anything went south which I knew it would. My mother told me that she was incredibly disappointed in me and said that she hadn't expected this sort of juvenile and immature behavior from me and demanded that I come back immediately to sort things out and bail them out. It was that exact entitlement that pissed me off and in the heat of the moment. I messaged her back saying that she was an adult and could sort things out on her own and to ask her husband for help since he's the one she relies on

for everything now. And that pissed her off because, after that message, she told me that she wished she'd never even agreed to accompany me on this vacation at all and that she should have known that I was jealous of her new life and her new family, which is why I was going out of my way to trouble them. I don't think this is my fault at all and my reaction was probably how any sane human being in my situation would react to something like this in the same way. I'm not jealous, I'm just I'm just disappointed that she's not putting them before her own flesh and blood, but even that's okay since I'm an adult now. What I'm not cool with is being disrespected by people who are counting on me and are not

even bothering to stand up for me when her husband is being so rude to me right in front of her. I'd offer abandoning my mother and her family in a different country because my stepdad tried to force me to share a room with my step-siblings on a vacation that I paid for." Update 1, Hey, guys. So I didn't apologize to my mother and neither did I get back. back in touch with her after I went through the comments here. I don't owe her as much as I thought I did and the fact that I even offered to take her on vacation should have been enough for her to appreciate my efforts, but she just had to take

it way too far. Not only did she demand that I let her bring her family along but also that I give up my personal space and privacy to accommodate her stepkids. I don't even understand why exactly she'd expect me to sit with them and discuss things like a family when they're not even my family in the first place. Like, her husband is her husband and not my dad and her kids are her stepkids, not my siblings. So I don't owe it to them to have any discussions with them of any sort. And I only abandoned them because they'd been incredibly disrespectful towards me even though I'd been the one to even organize this vacation for them all.

So the least they could have done was show some gratitude and respect to me but they chose not to and I really don't see anything wrong with what I did. The only place I'd say I went wrong was the fact that I even let my mother convince me to let her bring her family along with her on the vacation. They're not my family and I don't owe it to her to let her enjoy the trip at my expense, but I thought that I needed to repay her which is why I let myself be pushed around like this. She'd been a good mother to me, but that was no excuse for her to act so entitled now and that's just my opinion. It's been one whole day and I haven't responded to her, but she keeps texting me on and off. I haven't bothered to check her texts and neither have I blocked her since then she'll just make another account to bother me. So it's better to just let her ramble on and on since I've muted her and won't be bothered now. I'm enjoying my trip's solo now.

Update 2. L.O.L. My mom just showed up with the rest of her family at the hotel I'm staying at and threw a tantrum in the hotel lobby when they refused to let her up to see me or even tell them my room number which is just normal hotel policy. I don't know why she was surprised at that. But anyway, when I went down to check out what she was here for, she was furious and pulled me aside before yelling at me for what I'd done. Apparently, they'd somehow managed to check out of the previous hotel by coordinating with their bank and paying them off somehow. But now, they wanted me to answer them as to why exactly I'd abandon them.

I didn't think I owed them an explanation at all, but I still told her the exact reason that I'd left her and watched as her husband's face became more and more sour-looking. By the time I was done talking, he looked like he was ready to burst with annoyance at me, but I didn't care. It was his own fault that they had to suffer like this, and if he'd just been nice and polite to me, then I wouldn't have run away at all, so it was pointless to make faces at me to try and guilt trip me. It was also pointless to lecture me about family values and morals, which is what my mother chose to do. She told me that what I'd done was unacceptable and the way I'd chosen to deal with this situation was not only humiliating for them, but it was also a pathetic move on my mother. my part because it made me look like a coward who was too afraid to talk to her own family.

I was already pretty pissed off and when she brought up the whole family thing yet again, I had a bit of an outburst and told her that we were not a family at all. Because first of all, she'd lied to us and hidden this so-called family of hers from us for a long time and had only deemed it important enough to let us know when she was about to get married. Not only that but also, she and her husband had never made an effort to make me feel like family at all so it was really entitled of them to expect that I'd treat them as such. She should have just been glad that I offered to take them on vacation for her sake only, but if she was too blind and entitled to even appreciate that then, so be it, I didn't owe her

anything either then. I told her to her face that now, I didn't want to see her anymore, and I wanted them to leave me alone for the rest of the vacation. She tried to demand that I booked their flight tickets back home, but I refused since, like I already said, I'd done what I'd promised but if they couldn't appreciate that then I wasn't some fool who was going to go out of my my way to help them. They were both adults, they had their own money, and if they were going to take me for granted then they could kiss my offer goodbye. There was some more bickering after that, but then my stepdad had the good sense to intervene and took them all away, all the while shooting me the nastiest looks that he possibly could. As if I'd even care. A couple of hours

have passed since then and right now, I'm on my way out for dinner with a friend of mine who lives here and reached out to me when she found out that I was visiting. Hopefully, my mom and her family will just go back home and let me enjoy the rest of this trip on my own because I really have no interest in continuing this unnecessary fight. Update 3. So, turns out I was wrong about my mother letting go of this as easily as I'd thought she was going.

I thought that two days back, I'd seen the last of her since we got into a really bad argument and I pretty much told her that I didn't owe her anything so I thought that she'd leave me alone but clearly not. Today, right before I was about to leave and roam a little around the city on my own, I received a call from reception saying that my mother was back here to visit me again. This time it was just here so I decided to go see her because I just wanted an end to this TIF so I could have fun on my vacation. I didn't have any idea what to expect when I went to speak to her in the lobby but she looked more upset than angry so I knew that at least today she wasn't going to be as awful as she was the previous time that she'd come over to meet me. She started off by apologizing to me for losing her temper and acting entitled because she apparently didn't even realize that she was acting that way.

She also told me that she and her husband had been looking forward to a break from taking care of the household and the kids and the finances and everything all at once because they'd been having a very tense and rough patch before I invited her to accompany her on the vacation and she'd thought that she could use this as an opportunity to build. lasting bonds between all of us because she loved all of us equally and wanted us to be a part of each other's lives. However, she didn't know if that was the right way to go anymore because clearly, I don't get along with her husband and her husband doesn't seem to like me either. They got into a very nasty fight over what I'd done after they left the hotel the other day and he accused her of raising her terribly and crossed a line when he told her that his ex-wife had been a better mother than she had been, which was saying something since his ex-wife would regularly abandon his kids by themselves at home for hours at end while she'd go out.

That's the reason they got a divorce because he finally found out what she'd been doing and at the time, they were too young to be left alone in a locked room by themselves even if it was just for three or four hours. And for him to compare my mother to a woman like that, all because I had decided to stand up for myself was taking things way too far. I don't think anyone would have tolerated that, but my mother says she loves him so she's okay with that. The reason she'd visited me however, was to tell me that they were all flying back home the next day and said that she was sorry about her behavior. She'd been really stressed out regarding her relationship with her husband which is why she'd already been on edge and what I did just made it all worse.

So she was apologetic for that but she also told me that she wanted me to keep my distance for a while, which meant that I couldn't call her regularly to talk about life like I used to earlier. I didn't plan on calling her and talking to her while I was on vacation anyway but to know that I wouldn't be able to have the same relationship with her ever again for the foreseeable future kind of stung and all because of her husband. It sucked, but I told her I understood and we had a really awkward and cold hug. If I'm being honest, I wish she'd just not contacted me at all and hadn't bothered to apologize and stuff at all. Because this just makes me feel worse about what happened. Like I know she messed up, but she's still my mom and she was my best friend while growing up

so losing her to this new family of hers actually did feel like I was losing the only part of my childhood that I still carried around with me. It hurts, but there's not much that I can do and there's really nothing that I even want to do, given the circumstances. She's the one who wants to pick her husband and her stepkids over me so really, what can I even do? I'll just try to enjoy the rest of my stay here because I'm paying a bomb to stay at this expensive hotel, ha. So that's that.

Update 4, hi, so I came back home about three days ago and I'm supposed to resume work tomorrow. I tried to make the best of my trip and it was quite fun, I almost forgot about my situation with my mother until last night. When I heard from my grandparents that she decided to leave her husband because they were going through a bad phase anyway and they'd realize that they couldn't work things out anymore. So the family that she put me second to is now no longer her, which is a little strange and sad to think about because she picked them over me but she doesn't even have that anymore. We haven't spoken since she left me at the hotel that last day that she visited me and I haven't tried to. to reach out to her either because it just seemed pointless. And after a while, I forgot about her because I was having fun on the trip. Even after coming back, I didn't think of her a couple of times, but she didn't talk to me so I didn't try to talk to her either. I didn't want to force

my presence someplace where I wasn't wanted and she'd made it very clear that she didn't want to talk to me at the moment. And maybe she won't change her mind in the future either, from the looks of the situation now. I mean, she didn't even tell me that she decided to file for her. divorce and that's pretty big so I think this is pretty much the end of the road for my mother and me. And hypothetically, even if we do reconcile someday, things will never be the way they used to be. I'm okay with that now because I was a good daughter to her and I tried my best until I felt like I couldn't anymore. So I'm cool with whatever happens now and I wish the best for her because I'm too old to hold grudges against anyone, let alone my own mom. I'll try to move past this as well now,

I guess. I hope you enjoy this story. Partner requested that I consider exploring non-monogamy just before our marriage, but I later discovered that his spiritual mentors had been influencing him for an extended period. I, a 28-year-old woman and my fiancé John 28M, have been together four, as the title says, about five years. To understand the dilemma, I need to give you some background. We both came from very religious backgrounds, though it affected both of us very differently. John became a problem child, running away, causing problems, and eventually finding a parents would not approve of. Most of the members of this group were a part of the LGBTQ plus, smoked pot, engaged in protests and were either atheist or practiced different religion.

Although some of the members since have left, this crowd became his current friend group. I won't go into details about each and every one of them, but the main main ringleaders are Alex, 35NB, and Avery, 33M. From what I understand, they collected damaged people, as John jokingly said one day, and let them couch surf when things got rough. Alex is some sort of a Nipo baby and Avery works in IT, or something like that. John met them when he was 15. At first, I thought they seemed very cool and couldn't wait to meet them since John equated their relationship to that of a child and a parent, so clearly very important. people in his life. But when I finally met them, when we were 21, and in college and home for the

summer break, the meeting left me a bit disillusioned. Alex was catty and had Snide remark since I wasn't LGBTQ plus or anything, at most by curious, and Avery treated me like a child, but John said they always need to break new people in, so I tried to think positive and did my best to impress them with what I was studying and what my plans for the future are. Both regarding me personally and my relationship. But the more I talked, the more they seemed to disapprove of me. Despite the strange meeting, John seemed ecstatic to see them again, and gushed about how much they liked me, so I kept my mouth shut and just nodded along. Now, to understand a bit deeper on who Alex and Avery are, in the town they live in, they're something like local celebrities. Very spiritual,

their home is full of souvenirs they accumulated over all their travels, are also married, but their definition of marriage is very different from the traditional one. Apparently, they went to some tropical state and took some hallucinogens together, and in their state, they proclaimed everlasting love for one another. Quite a wild concept for someone like me, but I learned to be more open-minded since I left for college. That being said, they also said that they can see oras, whatever that is, and apparently love my fiancés. I don't know what they think of mine, but it probably isn't much. Which brings us to the topic I came here with.

Last week, after we got home from work, John sat me down and asked me what I think about being in a polygamous relationship. He said he loves me so, so much, more than is possible, and doesn't know what to do with the rest of it, thinking that it's fair to give it to someone else. I, on the other hand, don't have a limit on how much I can love him, so I said no, and that was that. However, the question has been plaguing my mind ever since. If you knew John just a fraction, you'd know he researches about things long before he actually commits to anything. Any lifestyle or relationship changes, whatever. This makes me think that he has already thought about it for a while, and that he also consulted Alex N. or Avery about this.

I don't want to villainize them, but I know, for a fact, they're not in a monogamous relationship, and they clearly don't like me as the rest of their little group. Again, I don't want to point fingers, and I won't ask John to show me his messages with them unless I have solid proof that isn't just a gut feeling, but I just have this horrible feeling that they, somehow, pulled in John. There's no way he just thought about it suddenly on his own. Five years of relationship,

and the idea of non-monogamy was never brought up, and now suddenly, just as we're about to be married, he brings this up. I don't buy it one bit. but I can't just go ahead and confront them now, can I? I just don't know what to do. I feel stuck. At home, I pretend everything is fine

since my group of close friends told me that I'm just overthinking, and I believed it for a while, but whenever I look at John, all I can think of is, he thinks there's a cap on how much he can love me, and he wants to love someone else. I want to deal with this, but I don't know how. If I bring it up with John, he'll just brush it off as well,

or he'll think I'm cheating or don't trust his friends. I worked hard to get their approval, and I know for a fact John shares everything with them. I don't take this for himself. I just hope that someone here can give me pointers on how to proceed. Thanks. Comments where OP has replied, Degenerate Tidilooker,

if you don't swing that way then end it. It'll only get worse once you're married. This is not something you can compromise on. He wants to fuck other people while you do not. Goop. God, the idea of ending our relationship is so scary. I feel like I built my entire life since leaving for college around him, and if we separate, I worried I'm going to fall apart. But I understand where you're coming from, I need more time to process the reality of it all. Tilda Y. God, we 94. Don't let them brainwash you. There are plenty of cases where people are pulled

into someone else's lifestyle and then randomly dropped. It will leave you wondering who you even are. I've been there and it ruined me. What happens if you drink the Kool-Aid and they reject you later? It's hard to come back from that. And I'm not saying this as a matter based solely on sexual preference either. New age mumbo-jumbo or oras mixed with radical changes in sexual interest can really fuck a person up.

A lot of people like this function almost like a give mind or the popular cleft. in high school. If you already feel like you're being pushed away from the group, and now he's making this request, it's a bad sign. Also the idea of him having so much love that it's unfair to only give it to you is a horrible cop-out and a very common excuse people use when trying to convince their soda tri-pally or open. It's often used to guilt people. It's almost like he's suggesting that you're greedy for wanting to keep your relationship personal and exclusive. I just say be careful. I don't want you to end up hurt like I was. Dedicating yourself to one person while their character and lifestyle is completely changing can end up with you getting hurt bad. If he is

sincerely changing in this way, I'd be worried about how much you invest in him. I only say this because I was fully invested in my ex and she started hanging out with a group of college friends more frequently towards the end. One day we got into a small argument over parking and it ended with her saying she wasn't certain what sex she was attracted to anymore and wasn't sure if she was even female anymore and that we had to end things. Now, I would have been fine with helping them figure themselves out, but for her it kind of just became her excuse to break up with me. I think it was more about her slash them wanting to have fun and was influenced by her group of friends all being single or experimenting who all came out around the same time.

I think she saw them having fun and felt FOMO TBAH. So to her, she was getting her chance to catch up on fun she may have missed out on being in a relationship. To me, it was losing a piece of myself that I invested years of love into. Oh, O-op, I'm really sorry you had to go through that. I really hope John isn't using this as a maneuvering tactic to get out of the relationship or a chance to catch up. It doesn't sound like him, but I'll keep this in mind. Update, September 17th, 24. Thank you so much for all the nice replies and genuine advice you've offered. Not to sound cliche, but I didn't expect over a hundred comments and some nice DMs. I'm sorry I didn't respond much. The whole situation was kind of emotionally draining. I figured I'd update when something

major happens, and I think this is it. But before I get ahead of myself, let me fill in some blanks in my story. Me and John came from similar backgrounds, but my family was a bit less strict, allowing me to go to college since I had great grades. The plan for me was to move back after getting a degree, finding a job, a husband, and living the traditional life, which, obviously, didn't happen because I met John, who literally changed the trajectory of my life. After a year, I switched from my first major to one I liked more and it's been a while since I contacted my parents. They didn't approve, of course, but with John's help, I didn't give in to their demands to come back. Now they know I'm getting married and are invited, but the last time we spoke was about two months ago. John has completely no contact with his parents since 18. I didn't talk about the friend group in more detail at first since I didn't think they were that important, but they do like me, at first, they were obviously a bit unsure since to them. I was a syshit white passing woman, but they warm up to me and I'm proud to call them my friends.

The only people who didn't fully accept me are Avery and Alex, and since me, and John got together officially, they tend to call me the wife in this strange, almost derogatory manner. It's not an important detail, but it gets on my nerves. Lastly, John is aware that opening up the relationship would lead to me being intimate, physically or emotionally, with other people, but he said it's a great chance for me to explore my by-side, though I haven't expressed the desire to really be with a woman in a committed relationship of that magnitude. On to what happened, I shot a message to John two days ago that we need to talk. He works from home, I don't, so as soon as I got home, we sat down to have an in-death conversation

about his proposal. I think he knew what it's going to be about and I had the feeling he seemed almost guilty, but I ignored that and basically word vomited everything that's been on my mind. This is embarrassing because I wrote down most of what the comments advised and was prepared to have a mature discussion, but by the end of my easily 15-minute rant, I was in tears and he had to hold me otherwise I'd crumble completely. The gist of what I said is that I'm hurt that he wants to fuck other people and that he doesn't care that I'd fuck other people too, that he believes there's a limit to how much he can love me

and that I can't see where this all came from, that he just sprung this on me out of nowhere just a few months before we're to be wed. We tried to have a mature discussion, yes, but by the end, he was frustrated, he did apologize for making me feel less than, but said that my outlook on an open relationship is selfish. What it all boiled down to was that he feels he didn't have enough time to find himself before he committed to me, which is bullshit because he didn't show any signs of wanting more than I could offer. We were very happy throughout the five years. I really believed I met my soulmate. I realized that, since we were engaged, he seemed to talk more to his friend group,

an extension to Avery and Alex. Again, I don't want to paint them as these cartoonish villains. They're really interesting in all, but now I want nothing more than to scratch those self-absorbed, smug smiles off their faces. In the end, I demanded to see his phone, and he was shocked. We had a rule that we can see each other's phones, but we don't share passwords or anything since relationship is built on trust, and neither wanted to be a prison guard in the relationship. Nevertheless, he unlocked and handed over his phone, and I searched his messages, even deleted ones, and found nothing out of the ordinary. Then I changed. I changed. He unlocked, he checked the call log and guess fucking what?

Hours long calls to and from either Avery or Alex. I was fuming and asked him what the hell does he need to discuss with them this long, and mind you, these dated months back. John eventually caved in and admitted it was them who brought up the idea of open relationship, but they also talked about everything else since their Suu-U-A role models. John admitted that he started getting cold feet a while ago and needed a safe place to discuss this. I guess I, his wife to be, am not safe. Please make it make sense.

Why even marry me, then? He promised we'd go to a couple's counselor and fix all of this, his issues with marriage, the open relationship thing, the whole nine yards, and that he'd book an emergency session with his therapist. That he loves me and wants nothing but to be with me. It was late, so we went to bed, despite how messy this all sounds, I was a bit more reassured by this. I genuinely love him, even if my post doesn't reflect that very well.

Though many people said to just leave, I want that to be the last resort. I was willing to jump through hoops to make this work. But guess who's the idiot? This morning, I woke up to an empty apartment and a message on my phone from John, saying that he needs a few days to think this all over and need space. He didn't say where he was going or when he'd come back. I called and called and messaged everyone I know, but no one can tell me where John is. I told him that he either comes back home in 24 hours, or this is over.

As you can imagine, I'm a wreck. I took the rest of the week off in between crying sessions and staring blankly into the wall. I obsessively check my messages in hopes of someone telling me where John is. To be honest, if he's willing to put me through this, I'm not sure I want to be with him. How can you do this to someone you love? Next story, named my daughter Annabelle after my husband's grandmother who raised him. Then found out that it was also the name of my dad's affair partner. I-26F just gave birth to my daughter Annabelle.

I didn't announce it beforehand because in the past one of my family members stole a baby name and it created a lot of drama. My mom wanted to know but I was adamant on keeping it a secret. My mom and dad was in the room when I gave birth and when it was time for me to sign the birth certificate, my mom asked for the name and I told her Annabel. Her face went pale and my dad didn't look too happy, but he said he loved the name. My mom left a few minutes later claiming she didn't feel well. She said she'll come over in a few days to help with the baby. Now I'm at home with the baby and my mom hasn't talked to me that much. We used to talk every day, so I was confused by this sudden behavior.

My sister Emily lives with Mom still, so I called her over to talk. When she got to my house, she explained how she overheard Dad and Mom arguing because about ten years ago Dad had an affair with a co-worker named Annabel. Mom hasn't been talking to him and he's been trying to get her to talk. I guess Dad realizing that Emily had come over decided to come over himself. He asked if there is any way that I can change Annabelle's name. I asked him why to see if he'll tell me the truth. and he did, he admitted to the affair.

He begged Mom not to leave him and she stayed. But just hearing that name had always put her in a bad headspace. I told him I can't, and that Annabelle was the name of my husband's grandmother who helped raise him. My dad begged and pleaded for me to change it, saying Mom was in the middle of packing her bags and heading to her sister's house. I told him I won't change her name and that it means so much to me and my husband. He began to raise his voice and immediately my sister yelled back and told him to get the hell out. She told him not to stress me out about a mess he created. He left immediately.

I'm not changing my baby's name but I feel like this is tearing the family apart. What should I do? Small edit. Annabelle isn't her real name. Her real name only has three letters so a nickname based off her name wouldn't be possible. And a lot of you suggested to change. her first name to her middle name, but her middle name is my mom's name, and I don't want to change that. Additional info, oop on changing her baby's name for her parents' sakes and it shouldn't be a problem,

whoop, it really is, though. My husband's mom had him at a really young age, so his grandma raised him. She recently passed away, so this our way to honor her. And this is a baby we've been trying for so for the past six months we've been calling her Annabelle. In this case my husband's feelings matter more than my mother's because this is his child too. My husband and I talked about it and as much as this hurts my mom, his grandma was superwoman. I can't hurt my husband because my dad hurt my mom. My dad needs to fix it not me didn't up know about the affair? So she could have give her daughter a different name-oop. I didn't know until four days later. Paperwork is already filed and now it will cost to change the name-oop should change names to avoid the trauma for all-involved Oop. This

might sound selfish, but why does a bad situation take precedence over a good situation? I get my mom is hurt. But what about my husband's grandmother who's sacrificed years, money, and time for a child that wasn't hers? I think the good outweighs the bad in this situation. It's my husband's child too. His grandma is just as important as my mom in the situation. Has up talked with her mother about the associated name? Oop, not about this. I just found this out this morning. But for the past few days it's been just quick three-minute conversations. I knew something was bothering her, I just didn't know what it was until today. Update 1, September 27, 2024. So my sister went over to my aunt's house to talk to my mom

about what happened. My mom then came to my house to talk. She broke down saying how sorry she is for being distant and that it was wrong not to communicate with us about what was happening. She said while the name did shock her at first, she knew how much Annabelle meant to my husband and that she'll never do anything to discredit the work she put into raising him. I asked why she didn't tell us about the affair. She said because she knew that she was mentally too weak to leave and the last thing she wanted was to show us it's okay to stay with a man who cheated on you. I asked if she planned on leaving dad, and she said she doesn't know.

She admitted that she never got over the affair and is mad at herself for ruining the moment her granddaughter was born. I told her is there a nickname that she wants to call hey by and she said no and that she wants to honor the memory of Annabelle's great-grandmother. We hugged it out and talked. So I think everything is okay. Comments where Op has replied, why can't Upp reject her husband's name choice for their daughter? She has the rights to decide on the name Upp. How am I selfish if my husband wanted to honor his grandmother? My husband's grandmother is essentially his mother. It's not from his mouth. Although he didn't want to change it he was telling it was probably for the best.

My husband does not control me or control how I think commenter. Yeah, this is not fixed. She's saying things, but not feeling them yet. And it's going to seriously hit the fan if she winds up divorced, or your sister starts harping on her to divorce, because she will 100% associate your kid with her life falling apart. Oop, I get this is a possibility, but I'm pretty sure no one will blame my child.

My father will 100% be responsible. Even my aunt told her that the baby is innocent, and that nobody is to blame but my dad. My mom looks up to my aunt and usually listens to her advice. I'm pretty sure my aunt was pushing for her to start a divorce, so it's most likely going to happen. Oop on how she will explain to her daughter about her name when she's older. Oop, they will hear the story about the women who stepped up to take care of her father

because his mother was on drugs. They will hear the story about how she saved her grandson from suicide. They will hear the story about how she worked two jobs to save up for his college fund. She will hear the story about how her great-grandmother had to make multiple sacrifices to make it to every football and baseball game. I think that trumps my dad's a fair partner oop going L.C. with her father-oop. The thing is I've never seen my dad act like that. So I'm going to go no contact until Annabelle is old.

and I'm heading from the birth. Then I'll see where he's at and if he still blames me then I'm going NC permanently update too. I'm going to get couples counseling as well as therapy for herself I thought that was good. I guess my dad reads somewhere that it's best to completely be honest about the situation if he wants to move on. My dad is a science teacher at a high school.

So Annabel wasn't actually a coworker but a student. He taught her as a freshman and had her in his AP class as a senior. senior. She graduated at 17 and they added each other on Facebook and things went from there, I guess. I asked my mom if she knew Annabelle was a student and not a co-worker. She broke down and admitted that she did. I asked her how can she be with someone like that? She didn't answer me. My sister was disgusted by him and cursed him out, calling him a child lover. She said she would never talk to him again. I agreed with her and told my mom that I can't my kids around her if she thought that my dad's behavior was okay. My dad said that Annabel was an adult

and that it was a mistake what happened between them. He then said it was a mistake to be open about the situation if it was only going to make things worse. My sister moved in with me which I don't mind because the house is plenty of room. My dad and mom have been blowing up our phones. But I can't talk to either of them right now. I hope you enjoy this story. partner's previous lover messaged him one day, so I addressed the situation, only to discover that he had been unfaithful throughout our entire partnership. My significant other, whom I'll refer to as Alex, has his own podcast. It's finally starting to blow up a little. Due to privacy and me quite literally being on a few of the episodes, I'm not naming the talk show slash podcast. He's nowhere

near famous, but he's finally starting to be recognized. I used to be the main co-host, but I've been too busy with work lately to be overly active on the show. Obviously, you can't have a podcast with one person. That's kind of boring. So Isaac told me he found someone to have as a more constant co-host when I'm not available. I told him that was great and asked him who it was. He told me her name was Abigail and sent me her Instagram. It didn't seem like he was hiding anything, so everything felt fine. But about a week later, we were having dinner with our friend group when Isaac's best friend, Josh, told me in front of everyone that he was surprised about how cool I was with Isaac working with his ex-fling. Let's say my reaction was the complete

opposite of cool. I was more upset that Isaac lied to me than anything. Why would he feel the need to lie about something like that? I like to consider myself pretty laid back about these kinds of things. Would I have felt awkward? Yes. But the show is recorded in the apartment that me and Isaac share and I seriously don't see him cheating on me. We're really serious and have been talking about marriage lately. But the fact that he lied? It's the only red flag he's really shown me, but I just feel really weird about it. When we got home, I made him talk to me about it. About a year before he met me, he met Abigail and had a friends with Benefell. And had a friend's with benefits relationship with her. Apparently he ended things with her because he wanted

something more serious, something with labels and she didn't. Once again, not that disturbing or weird, but he still lied to me. And the way that his best friend said it was almost in awe, like the idea was unbelievable, making me think there's more to the story. I told Isaac I don't feel comfortable with him and Abigail because if he felt the need to lie to me about working with an ex-fling, it's probably not the best idea. He said he really needed someone who could be a constant co-host on the show if I couldn't. And I said he would just have to find someone else because I was not comfortable with this. I told him maybe I would have been if he didn't lie, but he lost that chance. I kept going far enough to say if he kept talking to her, I might have to reconsider our relationship. He eventually agreed, but he's been giving me the silent treatment for the last couple days.

Our friend group knows what happened due to the mid-dinner announcement. It split 50-50. Some of my friends think I should cut him some slack and he didn't mean to lie. They're saying Isaac is a good guy who just didn't want to hurt my feelings, but I have a really bad feeling about this. Now I'm worried I really did overreact. Other things like this have happened before. Now that I really think about it,

but so many of our friends are saying I'm overreacting over a small mistake and I think they might be right. Now that I think about it, small things like this have happened in the past, but the thing is, I love Isaac. I'm willing to keep trying for him. I just can't get the sick feeling out of my stomach. The friends on my side think I should continue to talk to him about this, but I don't even know what to say at this point.

I really need some advice. Edit for all of the people going straight to break up. I do want to make it known that I really love this man. We've been dating for four years. We have a child. I'm kidding. She's a cat. I understand that ending things might be the only option, but right now I want to focus more on advice than hearing how I should end things.

Isaac has been with me during one of the hardest periods of my life, losing my sister. He is strong and kind and in the nicest possible way, an airhead. If breaking up becomes necessary, we'll switch gears, but all I need right now, is some brutal honesty and advice on what I should say to him. Edit 2, he does have another job due to the fact that we can't survive off my money and the podcast alone. He works today and I work tonight. I'll only have an hour to talk to him and I want thing to be a lengthy conversation. So I'm going to wait until I'm off on Friday.

I don't know what exactly I'll say yet, but I'll figure it out. Thank you for all the responses and I'll make sure to update. Update 1, August 3, 2024. I'm hoping this will reach all of the people that saw and commented on my post. First off, I want to thank you so much. To the ones of you who helped me think of questions to ask him, I cannot thank you enough. I was diagnosed with severe anxiety when I was 10 years old. I spent all morning pacing and had a minor anxiety attack before talking to him.

Normally things like this make me burst into tears, no matter how major or minor, but I'm proud to say I held my ground. He brought me coffee this morning, something he almost always does. He's been talking to me more now, but there's still this weird distance between us. He brought me coffee, kissed my forehead, and we ate breakfast together. He told me about work and everything felt so perfect, but I knew deep down it wasn't. That this nagging feeling would never go away if I didn't talk about Abigail. So in the most uncouth way possible, I blurted out, we need to talk.

Isaac tensed and finally nodded, surprising me by saying, we do. One point to anxiety. We talked for around two hours. I'm going to summarize our conversation. The first thing I asked was how long they've been in contact. He told me that the way they met was from being in the same psychology class in college and being in a study group. This added up. I know that he's still close with that old study group.

Some of the guys in that group are his best friends. Josh being one of them. He told me they've stayed in contact through that group chat, but haven't talked one-on-one until recently. The second thing I asked was why the hell didn't he tell me? I teared up a little asking him and he immediately started profusely apologizing. I told him that it hurt to hear it from Josh and not him. He said, and I quote,

I didn't think it was a big deal. I know it's stupid, but I just didn't think about it. He told me that they aren't the best of friends and she just seemed like a good replacement for me until I could be more active again. I asked why he wanted her and why she was the first thought and he explained how he wanted to do more topics revolving around college life slash classes and study tactics, and she would be a good person to do that with since she was a part of his life during that stage. He told me that he loves me and he never meant to hurt me. He admitted that he knew it might make me uncomfortable, so he chose not to tell me because he knows how much I tend to spiral due to my anxiety. I got frustrated and told him that wasn't his choice to make.

He agreed with me and told me he was sorry and he won't do it again. He added that Abigail will never have to come on the podcast, and he never wants to purposefully make me uncomfortable. I agreed, saying I didn't want her on the podcast. Then the tables turned a little. I thought this was going so great, we were in agreement and everything seemed fine. I had a little bit of closure and he seemed content. But then he asked me something I couldn't have guessed. There's something else.

She sent me nudes. What the fuck? I felt my heart break a little and asked how he responded. He showed me the messages. They were two fucking days old. He responded with a single message, I'm flattered, but I have a girlfriend. Yet he didn't block her.

I demanded he cut contact with her and he argued saying it would make it awkward for his friend group. I argued that I was his fucking girlfriend and yeah, the situation was awkward. I asked him how he would react if Josh sent me nudes, and they got to him. He admitted that he'd cut him off

and expect me to do the same. He nodded and agreed to block her. I watched him block and delete her contact. I still didn't feel. feel content. He saw those messages two days ago and didn't tell me. That was my breaking point. I basically said, maybe honesty isn't as important to you as it is to me, but if one of your friends sent me nudes I would tell you within minutes. I kept going and started crying, and he did too. He kept apologizing and saying that he hadn't brought it up to me because he

felt like I was avoiding him and he wanted to wait until he knew I was ready to talk, which felt like bullshit because he was giving me the silent treatment. I wasn't considering breaking up in my last post, but now? I don't know. I know this wasn't the update you guys wanted, and I promised there will be another one. I told him that I needed space, and I'm someone who's rare to set my boundaries until I'm really upset. He apologized and tried to hold me, but I stepped back. I'm writing this from my best friend's place. I'm over at her house right now staying the night. I told Isaac we can talk again in a couple days, but right now I need to think things through. The thing is, he cried when I started talking about ending things.

Isaac doesn't cry. The only time I've ever seen him cry in our entire four-year-long relationship was when his mom died. He loves me, I know he does. But I feel so lied too. Maybe I'm overreacting, but right now I just feel betrayed. I'm sorry and I know this wasn't the update you all. all wanted. But, thank you to all of you. If you want to give me advice, please do. I don't know where to go next and I still have questions I want to ask him. I'm okay with answering questions too.

I'll try to update if something else happens, good or bad. And if anyone's curious, yes, I brought our cat with me. Update 2, August 27, 2024. Sorry it's been so long since I've posted. has happened, and I'm honestly not sure where to start, but I'll start with this. We broke up. I ended up contacting Abigail. Some comments thought it might be smart, so I reached out to her over Instagram and asked for her side of the story. She had no idea who I was at first. She then seemed very surprised was contacting her. She realized who I was from the little Isaac told her, but she according to her, he said we started dating last month, not four years ago. This information really confused me, and I needed to know more. We met up for coffee and she filled me in that they'd been

hooking up every once in a while and her words maybe once or twice every six months for years. She started crying and hugged me while she apologized, saying she had no idea I'd been his girlfriend for so long. So apparently, their FWB relationship never ended and he had been cheating on me the entire time we had been together. She assured me they had been safe and I shouldn't have anything, but in all honesty, I kind of blanked out. I was with this man for four years. I don't blame her in the slightest. I think she wants to keep in contact, but right now it's too painful to talk to her. It's not her fault, it's purely Isaac's, but I just can't deal with anything that is remotely connected to him right now. I'm so confused on whether Josh knew this or not, but I feel like he wouldn't

have said anything that night at dinner if he did. I'm so sorry this update took so long. I broke up with Isaac over text classy, I know and told him my best friend would stop by to collect his things. I also bought our cat and said that I'd like to keep her. He protested on the breakup, saying we could get couples therapy, but I said there was nothing that could fix four years of lying. Right now I'm living with my best friend and we're having some serious girl time. I'm in shreds, But I know that this was for the best and it would have hurt more to stay. Sorry again for the late update and thank you all for your advice. Sorry for the repost.

It got taken down and I still want advice and thoughts. Update 3, August 28, 2024. This is the final update. I wasn't even going to write this, but I thought it would be a slightly happier ending for some of you guys in an all honesty for me. ended up calling me last night. At first, I didn't answer in fear it was really Isaac trying to contact me through him, but after the third call I did. This guy sounded pissed. The first thing he said was, name, I am so fucking sorry. He didn't give me any room to speak before

going on this tangent on what a shitty guy Isaac is and how he can't believe he was best friends with a guy like that for so long. He told me that he made a spontaneous stop by at my old apartment, something that wasn't unusual for him, and was confused when he realized I wasn't living there anymore. Isaac admitted to cheating on me, something Josh didn't know, but had suspected. You guys were right. He said that comment to warn me. Some things I've come to realize is Isaac was possessive. He wouldn't let me hang out with our male friends one-on-one. He was always lurking next to me. Josh told me he alerted our entire friend group of what Isaac did. and while two or three of the guys took Isaac's side, what the fuck, the rest felt terrible for me.

They cut contact with Isaac and those couple guys. Josh told me that if I need anything, he would love for me to ask him and he apologized again, saying he should have told me earlier when he thought he'd seen the signs, but he never would have assumed Isaac had been carrying this infidelity for so long. So yeah. I guess I could do another update if anything big happens, but this is where I stand. Relevant comments where OP has replied. What made Josh suspect the cheating?

Boop, last year I was away for a week because me and some friends went to the camping. Apparently he did one of his stopbeasts to see if Isaac wanted to hang out and Isaac wouldn't come to the door. Josh thought he heard a female's voice and some noises. Isaac ended up telling him I'd been on the phone with him, which is BS because I had no service for that entire camping trip. Boop when told to hook up with Josh I already said this to a reply up there, but Josh is the last person I want to see right now.

And frankly, I don't want to date anyone. I just found out the man that I wanted to marry has been cheating on me for our entire relationship. I'm probably not going to go back into the dating pool for at least a year, and I'm someone who likes some heavy emotional connection before sleeping with someone. Josh is a great friend, but in all honesty it was hard to just hear his voice over the phone knowing that he was so heavily tied to Isaac. Next story.

Dead BFF's mom showed up claiming my husband was the father. The truth was far worse than I could have imagined. I don't even know where to start. The past six months have been an absolute cluster fuck, and it only seems to be getting worse. My best friend since elementary school, who I'll call Alice, passed away in February from cancer. She had a two-year-old daughter

who went into the custody of her mom after she passed away, who I'll call Alexis. Last month Alexis showed up on our doorstep unannounced, telling my husband he needs to take responsibility for his child and either take custody or start finally paying child support. She says that Alice had told her when her daughter was born who the father was, but didn't want anything to do with him. To answer the inevitable, Alice was a traveling nurse and made a lot of money which is the only reason I can think of for why she didn't go for child support. During this conversation my husband had the worst panic attack he's ever had, so we had to end the conversation before I could get more details. My husband's story is, I don't even know

he said that Alice's daughter is probably his, but that it isn't what I think. Almost three years ago we threw a large housewarming party as we just moved into our dream home, after I finally finished residency and was set to make real money for once. Alice was in town and set to be at the party, but I was called into work before she got there. I didn't get back till after 3 a.m., party was winding down, my husband was passed out upstairs, and Alice had already left the party, which at the time I did find strange as we hadn't seen each other in months. My husband claims he woke up in the middle of the night to Alice on top of him, but he passed out again before he could say anything. He claims he never told me because he was worried I wouldn't believe him which I don't know if I do.

He showed me some texts he sent his best friend the next day asking for his advice about him thinking someone raped him, but if he cheated he could have had that conversation as evidence, especially since he never said Alice specifically. Ever since the party he has been very distant with Alice, and after she had her daughter he would even find excuses not to be around the house when she would visit at all. I don't know if that's because he cheated, or if Alice did actually rape him and this was his trauma response. Honestly, I don't know what to do. I've known Alice since we were children and she had never come across as that kind of person. But I've also known my husband for over a decade and he's not once ever given the inclination of a cheater. He's an attractive guy and I've seen the looks he gets at the gym and he's never even given more than a glance. What the hell should I do?

How do I figure out what the truth is here when Alice isn't even around to defend herself? She never even implied she liked my husband, let alone want to sleep with him. I told my husband he needs to get a DNA test before anything is decided on the child's part, but in the meantime he needs to move out while I think about what I'm going to do here. Additional info, Boop responds to Alice's behaviors when visiting her at home and if Alice would tell her about the affair. Boop, not that I noticed. She'd always been at least a little standoffish towards him as she thought I could do better. The first time she visited after she gave birth, she asked where he was since he wasn't home,

for the first time, but she never asked again after that. I hadn't thought about that actually, thank you. That's a good point. She always thought I could do better than him. So if it was an affair you'd think she would have told me on her deathbed at least. Oop on if her husband drinks or not. Oop, not at all. He rarely drinks, and generally only at parties which at our age of

are few and far between. He works a tough and stressful job, so I figured once he was buzzed he laid down and fell asleep, not that he had drank more than normal or anything like that. Did Alice ever named the father of her baby? Oop, she told me it was a man she met while in another state for work. Short-term fling. Willicious, wait, I get that you need to process all this, but you've told the potential victim of sexual assault that he needs to leave his home, his safe place, and you, his safe person. I think you've jumped the gun a bit here and shunned your life mate who may have been raped.

Oop, yes, I'm starting to realize I've made a terrible mistake. Update, August 12, 2024. After talking with you, I've come to the realization that my husband is being truthful. My best friend raped him. Several people pointed out that with Alice not liking my husband, if it was an affair, she would have told me when she was dying, if only to separate us. You're absolutely right. I was there, in the room while she passed. I held her hands for days, we talked about so much. If it was just an affair, she would have told me.

But if she raped my husband, she wouldn't have said a word. That's the type of thing horrible people take to the grave. I've also come to the realization that I made a terrible mistake asking my husband to leave for a few days while I gather my thoughts. Not to make excuses, but losing my best friend to. cancer, a long cancer fight at that, was brutal. To say that I was devastated. Wouldn't do it justice. That it happened only six months ago, I'm still feeling it every day. So to have this thrown on me? It's like I'm losing her all over again. Either she betrayed me and fucked my husband, or she betrayed me and raped my husband. Not only have I lost her, but now I've lost the good

memories, an entire lifetime's worth. It was impossible for me to look at him and not also see her, and be struck with the horror and realization of that loss all over again. I felt I needed to be able to break down, grieve, and think without the fresh wave of loss I got every time I saw him. It was wrong of me to ask him to leave, you're right though, and as of a few minutes ago I've righted this wrong. I called my husband, I apologized, told him I believe him, and begged him to come home. He'll be here in half an hour at most, and I'm going to support my husband the way I know he would have supported me. I've been an often on Reddit user for several years, and sometimes the advice given like these can be a bit hit or miss, but today you guys did good. You've helped me realize

not only that I was wrong, and being stupid at that, but that I was hurting the person that needed me the most. I was selfish. I have no idea what we're going to do as far as the potential daughter is concerned, but I can assure you will deal with it together. It's going to take a lot of time, and probably a lot of therapy, to grieve this new loss. I feel numb now, as though I'll never cry again. My best friend raped my husband, which means she was no friend of mine. She flaunted it, coming to my house, sitting with me, and gabbing. She brought her child here, trying to rub it in his face, right in front of me. She tortured the man I loved, and I was an unknowing party to it. I feel sick to my stomach over how many times she came over, just to hold it over him.

I'm honestly at a loss on how to make that up to him. If you all have any ideas, please feel free to give them to me, I think I'll need all the help I can get. Tomorrow I'm going to take a leave of absence from work, just until we can figure out our next steps, and we can get our heads on straight. Thank you, everyone. I hope you enjoy this story. At long last, I revealed my siblings hidden truths after he betrayed my closest friend and alienated everyone by obstructing my efforts to inform her of the reality. As a result, he has been excluded from the inheritance. And his fiancé left him at the altar. So I, 26F, have an older brother. He is three years older than me and pretty much the golden child of the family. And with good reason, he is definitely

above average. He is a neurosurgeon and works in one of the top medical institutes in the state, so I guess it's fair that my parents are super proud of him and constantly keep bragging about him, whenever it's possible. Sometimes, even when it's not possible to steer the conversation towards him, they manage to do it. Just because they love him so much. In comparison, I'm not that great. I work in advertising and it's a decent job, it pays well and I can afford a nice life for myself. But obviously, when you have a son who is a neurosurgeon, that's not enough to compare. So they like to play up my brother's achievements, so they don't have to talk about me. And I wish I could say that this has been a recent development, but they have always been like this.

Ever since we were kids, he was always the star and I was sidelined for the most part. He was a much better student than I was and not only was he academically better than me, but he was also a great athlete and also dabbled in art occasionally. There was literally nothing that he couldn't do and I was supremely jealous of him and would constantly try to outdo him but never would be able to. As a result, I was miserable for as long as he was at home. I only really came into my own as a person after he left for medical school after high school ended and I realized that there was more to life than just wasting it, trying because I

wanted my parents to brag about me as well. So I cut myself some slack and tried to actually enjoy my life instead of trying to outdo my brother because it just didn't seem worth it anymore. I was much happier after that, but my parents thought that I was being lazy and started comparing me to my brother even harder because I did not constantly stay in my room, cooped up, and tried to study so I could score better than my brother. But their strategy did not work after that because now that I knew I could actually be my own person instead of making my brother the basis of my identity, I did not have any to that life, no matter what that meant. And my grades were not even affected that badly, so it was all fine.

I just stopped trying to take part in every event and put myself through the hardest of challenges, just to impress my parents. They did not like that and they didn't bother to hide it either. It was very obvious to me that they would rather have two high-achieving kids who were constantly competing with each other than genuinely care about our happiness or how we turned out as people. So that's my parents for you guys. And in case you guys were thinking that maybe my brother did not encourage the competition and the unhealthy sibling rivalry, You guys are wrong. He was the worst of the worst and he made me feel even smaller, whenever he could. He was constantly putting me down and that's why I was always trying to defeat him, I guess. I just wanted something that I was better than him at and I still haven't found that one thing,

but I'm okay with it now. But I was far from okay about this back then and I made myself miserable, trying to beat him out for something. He just kept winning and he would rub it in my face all the time. He left no stone unturned to remind me that our parents would always prefer him over me and it was just so toxic. It was a horrible environment to grow up in and I hated my brother. I still do, don't get me wrong, but after both of us went our separate ways in life, I guess we sort of made peace with each other for a little while, for the sake of the family. After I left for college, I kind of just stopped caring about what my parents thought of me at all and just wanted to live my life on my own terms.

I still kept in touch with them, but that was more out of obligation than out of love. Both my brother and I had simmered down considerably after we left home, so whenever we would meet each other, like on the holidays or when the family would get together, we would be civil to each other. We were not friends by any means, but at least we were not constantly trying to one up each other,

which was a huge improvement from how we used to act earlier. The two of us had changed as people, but my parents did not, unfortunately. They continued to brag about my brother any time that they could and made me sound like a total loser, which was just really annoying all the time. But I couldn't exactly confront them about it without sounding petty and jealous.

So I would always try to tune them out and pretend like they did not say the things that they would say, so it would not bother me. I just wanted to avoid any sort of drama with my family, so I never said anything about the way they would behave and would pit my brother and me against each other. I could have said a lot of things and shut them up forever if I wanted to, trust me, but I consciously chose not to do that.

I had a lot of dirt on all of them, my brother and my parents, but I never told them because it would just lead to unnecessary trouble for all of us. And I did not want to engage, so I stayed silent about everything for years. It was not that I did not have a spine or the guts to speak out, I just didn't do any of it by choice because they were just annoying but the kind of secrets that I knew about them could ruin their lives and reputations. And I did not want to do that because that would be a little too harsh. Call me what you want, but I didn't think it would be fair.

For instance, I knew that my brother had been part of a pretty big scandal when he was in high school. He had been stalking a girl in his grade after she had rejected him and that had been going on for months before she finally broke down and complained to her father about it, who then pressed charges against my brother because he had also been harassing her online and threatening to ruin her application if she did not agree, to go out with him. My parents were able to hush the whole thing up because thankfully, my family was pretty influential but it was a huge deal because everybody knew about it in high school. But it blew over quickly because there are always other scandals to move on to. And he also had

a brief addiction to painkillers during his residency and was recovering from an ankle fracture. My parents went to great lengths to cover all of it up and make sure that nobody ever found out about any of that. And they did a pretty good job because nobody even remembers any of it. Except for me, of course, and it was just taken for granted that I would never speak up about any of this. I also knew certain things about my parents that I'm sure they would never want anybody else to know. Like I knew that my dad had an affair with his secretary, who was barely 22 and he was almost in his late 40s when it happened. My mother had found out about it and had threatened to leave him, if he did not fire the secretary and he had to do what he asked because he did not want a divorce

and had to let her go, but he also had to pay her a huge amount of hush money and make her sign an NDA to make sure she didn't talk about it because that would open the company up to. Lawsuits All of them had skeletons in their closets that I knew about but I did not speak about it because I thought that it was not necessary and I did not want to destroy them. It was pretty foolish of my parents to treat me like that, knowing that I knew about the secrets that they had hidden from everyone for so long. But it did come out eventually, recently, because my brother is a disgusting human being.

A couple of years ago, he started dating a friend of mine. I had just recently moved into a new and bigger apartment and posted a housewarming party for everyone. My friend and I had met each other at work, at my previous job, and we were pretty close. So when I found out that my brother had asked her out at my party, I was kind of skeptical and I even warned her about the kind of person that my brother was because I did not want her to get hurt. And I knew that my brother was kind of a jerk when it came to women, but she seemed to really like him, so nothing that I said would get through to her. It worked out well for a while

because they had been together for almost four years and got engaged at the beginning of this year. We had been friends, even though my brother and I did not get along. But she was happy with him and I really thought that he had changed for her sake because every time that she spoke about him, she had nothing negative to say and she made him sound like a perfect guy. So I thought that maybe my personal issues with him did not affect his ability to be a good partner to the one that he loved and I was happy for her. But a couple of days ago, I'd say maybe 12 days, I found out that he had been cheating on her with his co-worker. It was not a fling, it was a full-blown affair that he was having and it had

been going on for the past two years. They had been meeting in private and he had promised her that he would break things off with my friend and get with her, but when he got engaged, his co-worker realized that he was not serious and it was all just a joke to him. She had broken up with him a couple of days after he got engaged, but he was still trying to get with her after that and inviting her to places so they could hook up. And she was so disgusted by all of it that she decided that she was going to get back at him before she left her position, since she had found a better opportunity, and was quitting in a couple of days. She knew that talking to his parents would not help because they worship him,

and she was on the spot about that. She also did not want to speak to my friend directly because she couldn't bring herself to do that. She was so ashamed of herself. So she was reaching out to me because she knew that I did not get along with my brother and sent me all the proof that I needed to make sure that my friend got to know the truth and told me that now, I was free to do whatever I wanted. Even if I didn't say anything, she would be fine with it because at least she got it off her chest. And then she blocked me from the account that she had contacted me through and everywhere else. So I could not even get back to her, but I already had everything that I needed. I just had to think about whether I wanted to tell my friend the truth or not. And it was not a

hard choice really. I knew that I had to tell her about the affair because she was a really sweet girl and she deserved better. I had also known that everything about the way that my friend perceived my brother seemed too good to be true and it actually was. It was not like I was going to relish the experience of having to be the bearer of bad news, but somebody had to tell her and since it was not going to be my brother's affair partner and he himself would never tell her the truth, I decided that I would have to be the one to do it for her. It was a huge deal because I was putting my friendship with her at stake since I did not know if she would still want to keep in touch with me after she found out that my brother had been

cheating on her. But I thought that I had to do it because it was the right thing to do and I could not let her suffer like that because my brother had cheated once and I knew that there was nothing that could stop him from doing it again and again. So if not his co-worker, he would just find somebody else to sleep with behind my friend's back. And he would never leave her either, because there is something wrong with him, just like everybody else who cheats. After thinking about it for a couple of days, I decided to invite her over for lunch and then break the news to her. I did it as nicely as I could, but the news that I was delivering to her was still devastating and no amount of sugar-coating would ever change that. When I had to do that, I was in a good thing. When I

I showed her all the screenshots and told her everything that my brother's co-worker had told me, she seemed to be in disbelief for a while. She was in denial and kept saying that there must have been some mistake because my brother would never do this to her and she knew that he loved her but I had to tell her that it was the truth. And then she started crying and I think I have never seen anybody break down like that. It was heartbreaking and really difficult for me to watch because she was a really good friend of mine but my brother had broken her in the worst way possible.

and I really hated him for it so I tried my best to be there for her and I told her that if she wanted somebody to talk to, I would always be there, just one phone call away. Then she went home so she could confront my brother about this when he came back home from work. This was just one week ago and the wedding is supposed to happen in less than a month, so there is a sense of urgency in the situation right now. I expected her to call me back and tell me everything that was going on after she went back home, but that phone call never even came. And all of a sudden, I realized that she had blocked me on social media, and I had no way to get through to her. That was really shocking because I thought I was doing her a favor by telling her the truth about my brother and here she was, blocking me out. I tried to contact her from different accounts for a couple of days, but it did not work. She just blocked whatever new account I would create and was refusing to pick up my calls.

And it wasn't even just her, I had been blocked by a couple of other relatives as well and some people had even started to reach out to me and tell me that I was really wrong for trying to ruin their relationship just a few weeks before their wedding. I had absolutely no idea what was going on and what they had been telling people about me and neither did I have any other way to contact her or my brother or even my parents, because they had all blocked me. So I did the only thing that occurred to me and decided to go to her workplace and wait for her to come out so we could talk. About four days ago, during my own lunchtime, I went to my previous office and I waited for her to come out because I knew that she usually gets lunch from a nearby restaurant. As soon as she came out, I decided to

confront her because I needed to know what was going on. She was shocked to see me, but when she recovered, she put on this really cold face and told me to leave because she did not want anything to do with me anymore. I was very confused by this behavior because I had assumed that I had done something good to her and I was not going to leave without an answer. So I told her that I was not going anywhere and she absolutely had to tell me what was going on because what she was doing here was absolutely wrong. Then she finally turned around and told me that the reason she did not want to speak to me anymore was because she knew that I was trying to ruin her relationship with my brother on purpose because I was jealous of him. Now that she knew the truth, she was not going to let me come in

between them and ruin their relationship. She told me that she did not trust me one bit after she had come to know the things that I had done in the past, referring to things that I didn't even do, and I am sure that my brother had said those lies to her to manipulate her against me so she did not believe whatever I had told her about his affair and stuff. And she was even gullible enough to fall for all of it and believe what he was saying, instead of what I was telling her even though I had hard proof. I was really pissed off by the way that she was treating me like I was some idiot and I could never reach the level of my brother, so I was trying to drag him down by ruining his relationship just a few weeks before his marriage.

I knew that my brother had turned her against me and she was not going to believe anything that I was going to tell her because she had made up her mind about who she was going to believe, and it was not me. So I did not waste any more of my time, trying to talk to her, because it was her life and she could destroy it in whichever way she chose to. I was really upset and almost on the verge of tears because I had really thought that I was doing a good thing but it had backfired and now I had lost a friend, just because of my brother. I was massively pissed off as well because he had told her a bunch of lies about me and she had even believed it since she wanted to believe that the man she was marrying was a good person.

He had basically told her that I had edited and created all those screenshots on my own, just because I wanted to sabotage him. And apparently, this was not even my first time trying to do something like this, because I had also done things like this in the past with his previous girlfriends and told them all so many lies about him, that they ended up leaving. This is what he had told my friend and she had chosen to be with him. Fine then, she could be with him but I was not going to tolerate the fact that he had ruined my friendship with someone I considered close, just because he wanted to cover up his own affair.

And then I did something, to get back at him, which everybody is mad at me about because they think that I should have just let it go. So what I did was not a nice thing, I'll admit that. I definitely did it out of anger and wanted to get revenge on my brother for every little thing that he had put me through all through these years. I was sick of silently dealing with everything and consoling myself by telling myself that I was being the bigger person and letting them live in peace. Well, that was not going to happen anymore because I was finally going to speak up about all the secrets that I had been keeping to myself because at the end of the day, they were my family and I did not want to do anything that I could not take back. But at this point, I did not care anymore. So on the evening of the day that I decided to confront my friend about why she was ignoring

me after she told me off. I was very upset and I made a post. In that post, I included all the secrets that I had kept to myself for all these years that I have mentioned above and made sure to explain everything in great detail. I even made my account public just for this purpose, so it was very well thought out and definitely not in the heat of the moment. I talked about my brother's addiction to painkillers in his past and how he had creeped a girl out by stalking her for months after she said no to going out with him.

I also talked about my father's affairs with his secretary and how they had to fire her because my mother was not happy about it, but she still continued to stay with him and pretended like the whole thing never happened because she had nowhere else to go. And of course, being rich and staying with a cheating husband was better than being on your own and poor. Everybody in the family was not blaming me and refusing to talk to me, treating me like a pariah. I was aware of the fact that this was all his doing and I was really angry that he thought he could do this to me and get away with it. So I typed that post out and put it out there for everyone to read. I personally don't regret it, but people have been coming up to me after that and telling me that I took it too far because

this could ruin my brother's life and career, not just his marriage. I don't understand how that's any of my business because all I did was expose the truth, so that people would really get to know how my parents and my brother were, instead of the rosy image that they portray in public. I really don't think that I did anything wrong because I had been keeping this to myself for almost my entire life up until this point, but they just kept pushing and pushing me. So now, I was left with no choice but to expose them for what they really are. And I don't regret it, but a couple of my more lenient friends and family members, who didn't block me or turn against me because of my brother, now think that I should take the post down since this is serious. I don't think that I need to take the post down, but I also don't want to completely disregard what these. people are saying because they were the only ones on my side before this. So I'd offer making a post

that could ruin my family's life after they manipulated everybody to turn against me? Update 1, I have made my decision and unfortunately, it's not going to be in favor of my family. I have decided that I'm not going to take the post down, no matter what. If they did not want that information to come out and in such a nasty way, they shouldn't have messed with me. They knew that I knew these things and yet, they just took me for great. and continued to mistreat me for years on end. What did they even expect? Did they really think that I was just going to put up with that for the rest of my life

and let them get away with whatever they wanted? Yeah, that's not happening. The only reason I was even considering taking that post down was because I thought I was being very harsh, but reading the comments made me realize that I probably wasn't being hard enough on them. And anybody else in my position would have leaked the secrets way long ago because nobody would be willing to put up with this sort of disrespect for no reason. But I did put up with it, for a really long time, because I did not want to ruin their lives. However, now it's a different story.

I don't care what happens to them or what the repercussions of this are, I'm just done being the good girl and thinking about my family and their life. They never thought about my mental health and how I would feel about the things that they said and did. Then why should I? We are still all on talking terms, they have not abandoned me like I thought they would if I said that I was not going to take the post down. I explained my feelings and they seemed to understand where I was coming from, so that is sorted out for now and I have nothing to worry about. Nobody from my family has reached out yet and I guess they are too busy trying to save the face after the kind of secrets that have been exposed about them. Good, this will keep them busy for a while. Update 2,

I just heard from a couple of people that the wedding has been called off. I really couldn't be happier. My friend has not reached out to me but well, at least she's out of that relationship now. I think I did the right thing, I have no regrets. It has been almost a week and a half since I made that post and relatives of mine have been unblocking me left and right and trying to talk to me, probably to get more gossip, but I have been blocking them now. My only goal with that post was to make my family realize just how much of a favor I was doing to them.

I did not intend to carry this on because this was pointless and really negative. Whatever I wanted to do, I had accomplished it, and now it's time to move on. Update 3, so my parents wrote an email to me and said that they were going to cut me off forever. They were also changing their will and making sure that I was not included in it because I had let them down for one last and final time. They also told me that my brother had been placed on administrative leave, with pay, because the rumors flying around about him were crazy and it was not looking too good for his career at the moment. I'm not sure what that has to do with me, I just spoke my truth. If he did not want to get into trouble, then he probably should have been more upfront and transparent about his response. But well, that's just how they roll,

I guess. Secrets and lies are totally their thing. I'm just glad that I'm officially no longer part of the family. I would hate to be a part of a family like that anyway. They told me that in a couple of days, would be receiving a call from their lawyer and that's how I would know that I had been cut out of their will. As if that makes a difference to me. They can cut me out of anywhere they want to, I hardly care about it. Update 4, hi, guys. So it has been a couple of weeks since the wedding got called off. I have also been officially disinherited by my parents. I received a call from their lawyer a couple of days ago. It doesn't matter though, I'm cool with it. I am leading a nice life. I am leading a nice life and I have good friends who care about me, that's all that I could ask for.

Speaking of friends, my brother's ex-fiancee, and my old friend, she recently reached out to me yesterday and told me that she was really sorry for not trusting me and thanked me for everything that I did for her. She told me that she was moving away because she just couldn't live here anymore and was done with everything. So she wanted to meet one last time before she left and I think I'm going to do it. She's not a bad person, but she just fell in love with one. And that's not her fault. I just hope she finds happiness at some point. She's a good woman and she deserves to be happy. I hope you enjoy this story. At long last, I revealed my siblings' hidden truths after he deceived my closest friend and alienated me for attempting to inform her of the

reality. As a result, he has been removed from the inheritance. And his fiancé left him at the alter. So I, 26F, have an older brother. He is three years older than me and pretty much the golden child of the family. And with good reason, he is definitely above average. He is a neurosurgeon and works in one of the top medical institutes in the state, so I guess it's fair that my parents are super proud of him and constantly keep bragging about him, whenever it's possible. Sometimes, even when it's not possible to steer the conversation towards him, they manage to do it. just because they love him so much. In comparison, I'm not that great. I work in advertising and it's a decent job, it pays well and I can afford a nice life for myself. But obviously, when you have a son

who is a neurosurgeon, that's not enough to compare. So they like to play up my brother's achievements, so they don't have to talk about me. And I wish I could say that this has been a recent development, but they have always been like this. Ever since we were kids, he was always. the star and I was sidelined for the most part. He was a much better student than I was and not only was he academically better than me, but he was also a great athlete and also dabbled in art occasionally. There was literally nothing that he couldn't do and I was supremely jealous of him and would constantly try to outdo him but never would be able to. As a result, I was miserable for as long as he was at home. I only really came into my own as a person after he left from medical school after

high school ended and I realized that there was more to life than just wasting it, trying because I wanted my parents to brag about me as well. So I cut myself some slack and tried to actually enjoy my life instead of trying to outdo my brother because it just didn't seem worth it anymore. I was much happier after that, but my parents thought that I was being lazy and started comparing me to my brother even harder because I did not constantly stay in my room, cooped up, and tried to study so I could score better than my brother. But their strategy did not work after that because now that I knew I could actually be my own person instead of making my brother the basis of my identity, I did not have any to that life, no matter what that meant. And my grades were not even affected

that badly, so it was all fine. I just stopped trying to take part in every event and put myself through the hardest of challenges, just to impress my parents. They did not like that and they didn't bother to hide it either. It was very obvious to me that they would rather have two high-achieving kids who were constantly competing with each other than genuinely care about our happiness or how we turned out as people. So that's my parents for you guys. And in case you guys were thinking that maybe my brother did not encourage the competition and the unhealthy sibling rivalry, you guys are wrong. He was the worst of the worst and he made me feel even smaller, whenever he could. He was constantly putting me down and that's why I was always trying to defeat him, I guess. I just wanted

something that I was better than him at and I still haven't found that one thing, but I'm okay with it now. But I was far from okay about this back then and I made myself miserable, trying to beat him out for something. He just kept winning and he would rub it in my face all the time. He left no stone unturned to remind me that our parents would always prefer him over me and it was just so toxic. It was a horrible environment to grow up in and I hated my brother. I still do, don't get me wrong, but after both of when our separate ways in life. I guess we sort of made peace with each other for a little while, for the sake of the family. After I left for college, I kind of just stopped caring about what my parents thought of me at all and just wanted to live my life on my own terms. I still kept in touch

with them but that was more out of obligation than out of love. Both my brother and I had simmered down considerably after we left home, so whenever we would meet each other, like on the holidays or when the family would get together, we would be civil to each other. We were not friends by any means, but at least we were not constantly trying to one-up each other, which was a huge improvement from how we used to act earlier. The two of us had changed as people, but my parents did not, unfortunately. They continued to brag about my brother any time that they could and made me sound like a total loser, which was just really annoying all the time.

But I couldn't exactly confront them about it without sounding petty and jealous. So I would always try to tune them out and pretend like they did not say the things that they would say, so it would not bother me. I just wanted to avoid any sort of drama with my family, so I never said anything about the way they would behave and would pit my brother and me against each other. I could have said a lot of things and shut them up forever if I wanted to, trust me, but I consciously chose not to do that. I had a lot of dirt on all of them, my brother and my parents, but I never told them because it would just lead to unnecessary trouble for all of us. And I did not want to engage, so I stayed silent about everything for years.

It was not that I did not have a spine or the guts to speak out, I just didn't do any of it by choice because they were just annoying but the kind of secrets that I knew about them could ruin their lives and reputations. And I did not want to do that because that would be a little too harsh. Call me what you want but I didn't think it would be fair. For instance, I knew that my brother had been part of a pretty big scandal when he was in high school. He had been stalking a girl in his grade after she had rejected him and that had been going on for months before she finally. finally broke down and complained to her father about it, who then pressed charges against my brother because he had also been harassing her online and threatening to ruin her application if she did not agree to go out with him.

My parents were able to hush the whole thing up because thankfully, my family was pretty influential but it was a huge deal because everybody knew about it in high school. But it blew over quickly because there are always other scandals to move on to. And he also had a brief addiction to painkillers, during his residency, and was recovering from an ankle fracture. My parents went to great lengths to cover all of it up and make sure that nobody ever found out about any of that. And they did a pretty good job because nobody even remembers any of it. Except for me, of course, and it was just taken for granted that I would never speak up about any of this. I also knew certain things about my parents that I'm sure they would never want anybody else to know.

Like I knew that my dad had an affair with his secretary, who was barely 22 and he was almost in his late 40s when it happened. My mother had found out about it and had threatened to leave him, if he did not fire the secretary and he had to do what he asked because he did not want a divorce and had to let her go, but he also had to pay her a huge amount of hush money and make her sign an NDA to make sure she didn't talk about it because that would open the company up to. Lawsuits All of them had skeletons in their closets that I knew about,

but I did not speak about it because I thought that it was not necessary and I did not want to destroy them. It was pretty foolish of my parents to treat me like that, knowing that I knew about the secrets that they had hidden from everyone for so long. But it did come out eventually, recently, because my brother is a disgusting human being. A couple of years ago, he started dating a friend of mine. I had just recently moved into a new and bigger apartment and posted a housewarming party for everyone. My friend and I had met each other at work, at my previous job, and we were pretty close.

So when I found out that my brother had asked her out at my party, I was kind of scared. and I even warned her about the kind of person that my brother was because I did not want her to get hurt. And I knew that my brother was kind of a jerk when it came to women, but she seemed to really like him, so nothing that I said would get through to her. It worked out well for a while because they had been together for almost four years and got engaged at the beginning of this year. We had been friends, even though my brother and I did not get along. But she was happy with him and I really thought that he had changed for her sake because every time that she spoke about him, She had nothing negative to say and she made him sound like a perfect guy.

So I thought that maybe my personal issues with him did not affect his ability to be a good partner to the one that he loved and I was happy for her. But a couple of days ago, I'd say maybe 12 days, I found out that he had been cheating on her with his co-worker. It was not a fling, it was a full-blown affair that he was having and it had been going on for the past two years. They had been meeting in private and he had promised her that he would break things off with my friend and get with her, but when he got engaged, his co-worker realized that he was not serious and it was all just a joke to him. She had broken up with him a couple of days after he got engaged, but he was still trying to get with her after that and inviting her to places so they could hook up. And she was so disgusted by all of it that she decided that she was going to get back at him before she left her position, since she had found a better opportunity, and was quitting in a couple of days. She knew that talking to his parents would not help because they worship him, and she was on the spot about that.

She also did not want to speak to my friend directly because she couldn't bring herself to do that. She was so ashamed of herself. So she was reaching out to me because she knew that I did not get along with my brother and sent me all the proof that I needed to make sure that my friend got to know the truth and told me that now, I was free to do whatever I wanted. Even if I didn't say anything, she would be fine with it because at least she got it off her chest. And then she blocked me from the account that she had contacted me through and everywhere else. So I could not even get back to her, but I already had everything that I needed,

I just had to think about whether I wanted to tell my friend the truth or not. And it was not a hard choice really. I knew that I had to tell her about the affair because she was a really sweet girl and she deserved better. I had also known that everything about the way that my friend perceived my brother seemed too good to be true and it actually was. It was not like I was going to relish the experience of having to be the bearer of bad news, but somebody had to tell her and since it was not going to be my brother's a fair partner

and he himself would never tell her the truth, I decided that I would have to be the one to do it for her. It was a huge deal because I was putting my friendship with her at stake since I did not know if she would still want to keep in touch with me after she found out that my brother had been cheating on her. But I thought that I had to do it because it was the right thing to do and I could not let her suffer like that because my brother had cheated once and I knew that there was nothing that could stop him from doing it again and again. So if not his co-worker, he would just find somebody else to sleep with behind my friend's back. And he would never leave her either, because there is something wrong with him, just like everybody

else who cheats. After thinking about it for a couple of days, I decided to invite her over for lunch and then break the news to her. I did it as nicely as I could, but the news that I was delivering to her was still devastating and no amount of sugar-coating would ever change that. When I showed her all the screenshots and told her everything that my brother's co-worker had told me, she seemed to be in disbelief for a while. She was in denial and kept saying that there must have been some mistake because my brother would never do this to her and she knew that he loved her, but I had to tell her that it was the truth.

And then she started crying and I think I have never seen anybody break down like that. It was heartbreaking and really difficult for me to watch because she was a really good friend of mine, but my brother had broken her in the worst way possible. And I really hated him for it, so I tried my best to be there for her and I told her that if she wanted somebody to talk to, I would always be there, just one phone call away. Then she went home, so she could confront my brother about this when he came back home from work. This was just one week ago and the wedding is supposed to happen in less than a month, so there is a sense of urgency in the situation right now. I expected her to call me back and tell me everything that was going on after she went back home, but that phone call never even came. And all of a sudden, I realized that she had blocked me on social media, and I had no way to get through to her.

That was really shocking because I thought I was doing her a favor by telling her the truth about my brother and here she was, blocking me out. I tried to contact her from different accounts for a couple of days, but it did not work. She just blocked whatever new account I would create and was refusing to pick up my calls. And it wasn't even just her, I had been blocked by a couple of other relatives as well and some people had. even started to reach out to me and tell me that I was really wrong for trying to ruin their relationship just a few weeks before their wedding. I had absolutely no idea what was going on and what they had been telling people about me and neither did I have any other way to contact her or my brother or even my parents, because they had all blocked me. So I did the only thing that occurred to me

and decided to go to her workplace and wait for her to come out so we could talk. About four days ago, during my own lunch time, I went to my previous office and I waited for her to come out because I knew that she usually gets lunch from a nearby restaurant. As soon as she came out, I decided to confront her because I needed to know what was going on. She was shocked to see me but when she recovered, she put on this really cold face and told me to leave because she did not want anything to do with me anymore. I was very confused by this behavior because I had assumed that I had done something good to her and I was not going to leave without an answer. So I told her that I was not going anywhere and she absolutely had to tell me what was going on because what she was doing

here was absolutely wrong. Then she finally turned around and told me that the reason she did not want to speak to me anymore was because she knew that I was trying to ruin her relationship with my brother on purpose because I was jealous of him. Now that she knew the truth, she was not going to let me come in between them and ruin their relationship. She told me that she did not trust me one bit after she had come to know the things that I had done in the past, referring to things that I didn't even do and I am sure that my brother had said those lies to her to manipulate her against me so she did not believe whatever I had told her about his affair and stuff. And she was even gullible enough to fall for all of it and believe what he was saying, instead of what I was telling her even though I had hard

proof. I was really pissed off by the way that she was treating me like I was some idiot and I could never reach the level of my brother, so I was trying to drag him down by ruining his relationship just a few weeks before his marriage. I knew that my brother had turned her against me and she was not going to believe anything that I was going to tell her because she had made up her mind about who she was going to believe, and it was not me. So I did not waste any more of my time, trying to talk to her, because it was her life and she could destroy it in whichever way she chose to. I was really upset and almost on the verge of tears because I had really thought that I was doing a good thing but it had backfired and now I had lost a friend, just because of my brother. I was massively

off as well because he had told her a bunch of lies about me and she had even believed it since she wanted to believe that the man she was marrying was a good person. He had basically told her that I had edited and created all those screenshots on my own, just because I wanted to sabotage him. And apparently, this was not even my first time trying to do something like this, because I had also done things like this in the past with his previous girlfriends and told them all so many lies about him, that they ended up leaving. This is what he had told my friend and she had chosen to be with him. Fine then, she could be with him but I was not going to tolerate the fact that he had ruined my friendship with someone I considered close, just because he wanted to cover up his own

affair. And then I did something, to get back at him, which everybody is mad at me about because they think that I should have just let it go. So what I did was not a nice thing, I'll admit that. I definitely did it out of anger and wanted to get revenge on my brother for every little thing that he had put me through all through these years. I was sick of silent, dealing with everything and consoling myself by telling myself that I was being the bigger person and letting them live in peace. Well, that was not going to happen anymore because I was finally going to speak up about all the secrets that I had been keeping to myself because at the end of the day, they were my family and I did not want to do anything that I could not take back. But at this point,

I did not care anymore. So on the evening of the day that I decided to confront my friend about why she was ignoring me after she told me off. I was very upset and I made a post. I made a post. In that post, I included all the secrets that I had kept to myself for all these years that I have mentioned above and made sure to explain everything in great detail. I even made my account public just for this purpose, so it was very well thought out and definitely not in the heat of the moment. I talked about my brother's addiction to painkillers in his past and how he had creeped a girl out by stalking her for months after she said no to going out with him. I also talked about my father's affairs with his secretary and how they had to fire her

because my mother was not happy about it, but she still continued to stay with him and pretended like the whole thing never happened because she had nowhere else to go. And of course, being rich and staying with a cheating husband was better than being on your own and poor. Everybody in the family was not blaming me and refusing to talk to me, treating me like a pariah.

I was aware of the fact that this was all his doing and I was really angry that he thought he could do this to me and get away with it. So I typed that post out and put it out there for everyone to read. I personally don't regret it, but people have been coming up to me after that and telling me that I took it too far because this could ruin my brother's life and career, not just his marriage. I don't understand how that's any of my business because all I did was expose the truth, so that people would really get to know how my parents and my brother were, instead of the rosy image that they portray in public. I really don't think that I did anything wrong because I had been keeping this to myself for almost my entire life up until this point, but they just kept pushing and pushing me. So now, I was left with no choice but to expose them for what they really are.

And I don't regret it, but a couple of my more lenient friends and family members, who didn't block me or turn against me because of my brother, now think that I should take the post down since this is serious. I don't think that I need to take the post down, but I also don't want to completely disregard what these people are saying because they were the only ones on my side before this. So I'd offer making a post that could ruin my family's life after they manipulated everybody to turn against me?

Update 1, I have made my decision and unfortunately, it's not going to be in favor of my family. I have decided that I'm not going to take the post down, no matter what. If they did not want that information to come out and in such a nasty way, they shouldn't have messed with me. They knew that I knew these things and yet, they just took me for granted and continued to mistreat me for years on end.

What did they even expect? Did they really think that I was just, going to put up with that for the rest of my life and let them get away with whatever they wanted? Yeah, that's not happening. The only reason I was even considering taking that post down was because I thought I was being very harsh, but reading the comments made me realize that I probably wasn't being hard enough on them. And anybody else in my position would have leaked the secrets way long ago because nobody would be willing to put up with this sort of disrespect for no reason. But I did put up with it, for a really long time, because I did not want to ruin their lives. However, now it's a different story.

I don't care what happens to them or what the repercussions of this are. I'm just done being the good girl and thinking about my family and their life. They never thought about my mental health and how I would feel about the things that they said and did. Then why should I? We are still all on talking terms. They have not abandoned me like I thought they would if I said that I was not going to take the post down. I explained my feelings and they seem to understand where I was coming from, so that is sorted out for now and I have nothing to worry about. Nobody from my family has reached out yet and I guess they are too busy trying to save the face after the kind of secrets that have been exposed about them. Good, this will keep them busy for a while. Update 2, I just heard

from a couple of people that the wedding has been called off. I really couldn't be happier. My friend has not reached out to me but well, at least she's out of that relationship now. I think I did the right thing, I have no regrets. It has been almost a week and a half since I made that post and relatives of mine have been unblocking me left and right and trying to talk to me, probably to get more gossip, but I have been blocking them now. My only goal with that post was to make my family realize just how much of a favor I was doing to them.

I did not intend to carry this on because this was pointless and really. really negative. Whatever I wanted to do, I had accomplished it, and now it's time to move on. Update 3, so my parents wrote an email to me and said that they were going to cut me off forever. They were also changing their will and making sure that I was not included in it because I had let them down for one last and final time. They also told me that my brother had been placed on administrative leave, with pay, because the rumors flying around about him were crazy and it was not looking too good for his career at the moment. I'm not sure what that has to do with me, I just spoke my truth. If he did not want to get into trouble, then he probably should have

been more upfront and transparent about his response. But well, that's just how they roll, I guess. Secrets and lies are totally their thing. I'm just glad that I'm officially no longer part of the family. I would hate to be a part of a family like that anyway. They told me that in a couple of days, would be receiving a call from their lawyer and that's how I would know that I had been cut out of their will. As if that makes a difference to me. They can cut me out of anywhere they want to, I hardly care about it. Update 4, hi, guys. So it has been a couple of weeks since the wedding got called off. I have also been officially disinherited by my parents. I received a call from their lawyer a couple of days ago. It doesn't matter though, I'm cool with it. I am leading a

nice life and I have good friends who care about me, that's all that I could ask for. Speaking of friends, my brother's ex-fiancee, and my old friend, she recently reached out to me yesterday and told me that she was really sorry for not trusting me and thanked me for everything that I did for her. She told me that she was moving away because she just couldn't live here anymore and was done with everything. So she wanted to meet one last time before she left and I think I'm going to do it. She's not a bad person, but she just fell in love with one. And that's not her fault. I just hope she finds happiness at some point.

She's a good woman and she deserves to be happy. I hope you enjoy this story. Boyfriend abruptly declared I wasn't his ideal woman and departed. Upon investigating his social media, I discovered he was in a relationship with a more youthful iteration of myself. He suddenly wants me back. Hi guys. I know it's probably hard to believe given how nauseatingly pathetic I sense.

right now, but before this happened, I really felt like a confident and content human being. Almost all of my current friends are mutual friends with my ex-fiancee, so I don't want to embroil them in this drama or compel anyone to choose sides or feel uncomfortable. So I guess I'm trying to turn to this community for solace and guidance because I've read a great deal of mature and grounded advice here. I hope this sounds somewhat coherent as I've currently locked myself in a conference room and shut the blinds so no one can see me cry as I type this. I was with my ex-fiance for seven years.

He is the only romantic partner I've ever truly loved. I was completely, head over heels in love with him. Even now, after all this, I still feel that way about him. He is charming, goofy, kind, quick-witted, interesting, ambitious, and gorgeous. We got engaged two years ago but we're not in a rush to get married. About a year ago, we began to seriously contemplate trying for a baby. We had lived together happily for six years, we had done all the traveling and partying we wanted to in our 20s, and we were excited to start our family. Over the next six months, he was much busier than normal, but I didn't think anything was wrong.

I did my best to alleviate any extra stress he had, though I was experiencing some extra pressure at work too, by taking over all the housework in errands, helping him organize and pack for trips, and just being understanding when he would work very late or need to leave for a week or two. We didn't spend as much time together during that period and I missed him a lot, but I thought we were still happy. When the six months were over, our schedules reverted back to normal. I felt relieved until I started to notice him becoming more distant despite that fact that we finally had more time together. He started going on his phone more frequently when we were together and seemed to be more protective of his phone. I'm not generally a jealous person and I trusted him completely so I didn't think much of it. Then one day, after another month had passed, I brought up the topic of trying for a baby as we discussed. I could immediately tell something was wrong.

He was quiet for a while and then he unleashed a flood. He said he was unhappy with our relationship and had been for some time. He said that he cared about me deeply but that the spark in our relationship had died and that he tried to convince himself he could live without that spark but had ultimately decided that he couldn't. He said I had done nothing wrong and in fact was the perfect partner but that didn't change the fact that he couldn't shake this nagging feeling that I wasn't the one for him. He said that he didn't want to hurt me but that he couldn't condemn himself to a lifetime of settling for someone that wasn't his dream girl even though he didn't know if his dream girl existed. He said he was sorry but he couldn't live a lie anymore.

I don't think I said a single word as he was telling me all this because I just felt so utterly shocked and blindsided. I just stood there, staring and listening, and crying silently. When he finished, all I could utter was something like, okay, I'm sorry, I didn't know, do you still love me? He paused for a while and then said that he loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore. We proceeded to spend the whole night discussing his feelings and our relationship, until we were both so exhausted we couldn't cry anymore and the sun was coming up. He said he was sorry again, and it was probably best if he stayed at a

friend's place, so he packed up some stuff and left. That was about five months ago. We never really talked in person again. His brother and his best friend came over that weekend to get the rest of his stuff and I just left while they were packing because I couldn't stand to be there. I felt so shocked and numb and traumatized and tired that I didn't even cry much. I couldn't really process what was happening as I went through the motions of moving out and explaining the situation to my family. When I finally moved into my new, new place and sat alone with my boxes, I completely broke down. I could not stop crying and dry heaving. I ended up using five vacation days to take off a week of work, which really irked my manager.

I could not get out of bed. I barely ate, living off this old tub of peanut butter. I looked through all our old pictures and tried to figure out where it all went wrong. Then for four months, I tried my best to move on. I deleted all my social media. app so I wouldn't have to see him. I dove into work. I ramped up my hobbies. I exercised to keep my mind occupied. I met with friends and family and pretended everything was okay. I started going to my therapist again, which helped a bit. I finally thought I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. Then a month ago, I ran into a mutual friend from college. She said it was really sad to see we weren't together anymore, and surprising to see he'd moved on so fast. I told her I wasn't

keeping up with him anymore, but that I was doing okay. When I got home, even though I knew it was a terrible idea, I re-downloaded Instagram and went to his profile. His latest picture was him at his cousin's wedding with his arm around a gorgeous girl. All the old pictures of him and I were gone from his profile. Again, I knew it was a terrible, self-destructive idea. But I went to the girl's and Googled her. She is literally a younger, smarter, prettier, and better version of myself. We both studied at the same university, but she completed a prestigious program which I was rejected from. We both have green eyes and brown hair, but she is far prettier and legitimately looks like a model. We are both thin and fit, but she has an amazing hourglass figure and looks far more

stylish than me and has tens of thousands of followers even though she's not an influencer or whatnot. In fact, we both work at the same company, I'm pretty sure my ex met her through work, but she landed a job in a prestigious division right out of undergrad and likely makes more money than me. She is an improved version of me, seven years younger. And the love of my life is dating her. For the past month, I've been spiraling. I can't stop stalking my ex-fiancee and this girl. I look at her Instagram every day and torture myself with her gorgeous pictures.

She's posted a dozen pictures with my ex over the past few months and he looks so happy, healthy, and fit. They've gone on trips together, he's brought her to his hometown, and he's even posted a picture of them with a mushy caption which he never did when we were together. I have no evidence and I don't think my ex would do this, but I now suspect he was at least interested in her while we were still together. She started at the company about a year ago. I'm so paranoid of running into them. I can recognize that. that my behavior is obsessive and masochistic and I've deleted Instagram and told myself I'm not going to do this anymore only to wake up the next day and re-download the app and do it again. My therapist has been trying to help but I just cannot move past this. I'm stuck in this mental loop of self-loathing and self-pity, this crazy mix of extreme sadness

and latent anger. I feel so incredibly low. Worthless, used up, discarded, and suddenly, so incredibly old. I know that comparison is the thief of joy. I know that I am objectively still young enough to move on. I know that social media is a highlight real and their relationship may not be perfect. I know that this girl has done nothing wrong to me. I know that my ex deserves to find his dream girl. But none of this knowledge helps soften the fact that I thought that by this time this year,

I would be pregnant with the love of my life and instead, I'm alone, and he's found someone better. Please, if you've ever experienced something similar, share your words of wisdom or commiserate with me. I don't know. I just feel so worthless and alone. Update, hi again, guys. It's been about three months since I posted about my struggle to move past my seven-year relationship with my ex-fiancee. While I cringe when I think about the pathetic state I was in when I wrote that post, sobbing alone in that conference room, I was stunned by the empathetic. mature, and helpful advice I received from members of this subreddit.

These past few months have been an absolute roller coaster and I thought I owed this subreddit an update given how much solace and guidance you guys gave me during some of my darkest days. I don't think things would have worked out nearly as well if I had continued to bottle up those festering emotions and isolate myself so I'm grateful for every single person who commented and messaged me. Thank you, thank you, thank you. So, here's what happened. The night I made that post, I finally blocked my ex-fiancee and his girlfriend on Instagram as many of you suggested. I think actually verbalizing how obsessive and masochistic my behavior was, instead of keeping it all inside, and finally feeling validated in my emotional reactions after reading your sympathetic comments,

instead of feeling alone and crazy, click something in my brain. I resolved to break out of that self-destructive loop, to stop torturing myself with their perfect pictures and reclaim a modicum of self-respect. It was an incredible relief to not be constantly following the impulse to view their new pictures and give myself some time to heal instead of picking at that scab every single day. That weekend, I decided to reconnect with my family and friends and stop pretending that I was handling the breakup flawlessly. They were incredibly compassionate, though also shocked that I had been hiding my dark feelings so well, and it was like I'd instantly rebuilt my support network. I didn't realize how emotionally isolated I had become

until I was able to be honest and open with people in my life. I did continue to avoid talking to friends who were mutual friends with my ex because I didn't want to put anyone in an awkward position, but I was able to reconnect with a few of my other friends and I took the initiative to finally make some fun plans. Getting out of the house to enjoy brunches, hikes, and shows with my friends over the past few months has been incredibly beneficial for my mental health.

Just being in new environments and focusing on people other than my ex was therapeutic, even for someone who tends towards introversion like myself. For your suggestions, I also decided to try out another therapist. I did find my original therapist somewhat helpful, but I also felt like he was not able to relate to some of the nuances in my issues given that he was in his late 50s so we had a bit of a generational gap. My new therapist is incredibly compatible with me, and instantly understood the intricacies of my problems.

She has helped considerably with addressing the roots of my insecurities and was able to validate and analyze my feelings in a much more intimate way. If you are struggling to find therapy useful, I highly recommend shopping around a bit for a more compatible therapist. Therapy is certainly not one size fits all. Another popular suggestion from you guys was finding a job at another company, away from my ex-fiancee and his girlfriend. I didn't think that would be possible since the job market in my field is not great at I began actively searching for other positions. I brushed up my resume, filled out a couple applications, and even surprisingly secured an interview.

Then out of the blue, someone above me and my division quit to join a competitor. The senior managers were quite eager to fill his role quickly so they decided to go with an internal hire. And after five or six rounds of interviews, God, I absolutely dread interviews, I got the job. I'm so grateful for this promotion, not only is the salary substantially better. but the hours are actually more consistent as well. It's crazy, I feel like the momentum of my life has shifted so quickly. And I finally have an office. It's tiny but I really enjoy it.

The only downside was this promotion also meant I would have to continue working in the same building, albeit a very large building, as my ex. And as I left work before Christmas, the moment I'd been dreading came, I ran into my ex as I was leaving the office. We exchanged a few pleasantries and he complimented my new haircut. I thanked him, wished him well, and said I had to hurry to catch the next train. I wish I could say I felt cool and collected but I was so nervous to see him again for the first time in like six months that I was almost shaking. On the commute home, I calmed down and actually thought, hey, that wasn't so bad.

He looked good but I didn't feel a rush of sadness or desire or anything. I mostly just felt awkward, like we'd become strangers again. I didn't feel that familiar impulse to stalk his Instagram and actually felt happy to see he was doing okay since I'd cared for him for so many years. I felt like at last, I was really moving forward. The next day, I woke up to a dozen messages from my ex-fiancee. They started at around 2 a.m. and were slightly incoherent in part, so I'm guessing he was a bit drunk when he sent them. They were all long walls of text, which surprised me because he's not typically big on verbalizing his emotions.

He wrote that he hadn't been able to stop thinking about me since we ran into each other outside the office. But he was sad that we weren't friends anymore because I still felt like his best friend, and that he regretted how everything went down. He said he questioned if he'd made a huge mistake in a moment of weakness and fucked his whole life up and that he couldn't help but regret it all when he saw me. He apparently noticed that I'd blocked him on Instagram, which I found funny given how intensely I'd been stalking his Instagram, and said that made him really sad. I gathered from his messages that he'd likely broken up with the woman I'd seen on his Instagram because he said that he felt like he had been searching for some ideal woman who doesn't exist and that he wanted to reignite our spark after failing to find that same spark with other people. I'm not going to lie, it was shocking to read his texts and I was trembling and struggling to process a lot of it at first. Part of me wanted impulsively to give him another chance, but after taking a day to mull over his words, I ended up feeling like he was less sorry that he'd lost our relationship and more sorry that the greener pastures he sought weren't quite as green as he'd imagined.

I tried to respond kindly but firmly, saying that I really treasured and appreciated our relationship, but that I felt like I could no longer trust him to the same degree I once did and that I felt like it would be confusing and painful for us to become friends in the near future. I told him how hurt I felt when he blindsided me after promising that nothing was wrong and how I struggled for a long time to figure out what was missing in our relationship but ultimately felt that as long as he thought the missing part was so crucial that he wanted to leave after all those years together. Then we probably aren't meant to be together. I wished him the best. He didn't respond to my messages. I was a bit shaken by the whole thing, but I proceeded to enjoy my holiday break with my family and even elected to go to my friend's New Year's Eve party,

which I was considering skipping. Well, I'm super glad I didn't skip the party because I ended up meeting a wonderful man there. He's funny, intelligent, cute, interesting, compassionate, and is eager to settle down and have kids after also somewhat recently exiting a long-term relationship. We've gone on three dates so far, and at the risk of sounding too enthusiastic, they've been the best dates of my life. We want to take it slow since we were both in long-term relationships a year ago, but we've been stunned by how compatible our personalities and interests

and goals are, and frankly, we're also both quite keen to start a family as soon as possible. So while I'm trying not to be overly confident in this relationship, I'm also super excited to see where it goes. In conclusion, thanks in large part to the advice I received three months ago in this subreddit, I've emerged from a very dark place and am now cautiously optimistic about my future for the first time in a long time. Next story, parents secretly took out a $30,000 loan in my name to buy a boat, when I found out my mom threatened to call child services, but she got arrested and now the company is suing her. I knew my mom had her eye on a pontoon boat for the last year. She and my dad retired in 2022 and while they aren't swimming in money, they weren't hurting much for it either, or so I thought.

They bought a boat in February for a little over $30,000. I didn't think a lot of it since they always rented a pontoon boat two to three times a year and didn't appear to have money issues. At the start of July, I began getting my ducks in a row to buy a house. When I applied for a pre-approval, I found out my credit score was barely over $600 and I had an extra $30,000 plus in debt I had no idea about. Even worse, it was 90-plus days late. I told the lender the account wasn't mine and he said my identity had probably been stolen, but it was probably someone close to me as the money would have had to go to a bank account with my name on it. I shared a bank account with my ex-fiancee and asked the bank to look into it.

They said the account had been closed a couple of years ago, when we broke up, and no attempts to send money to it slash take money from it had been made since. I filed a dispute with the company and the credit agencies as it was obvious to me I had been hacked or my identity had been stolen. About a week ago, I got a notice from the company to my apartment. First I had ever heard from them, saying they were going to charge off the account if payment wasn't made. I requested more information from them and they linked me to their fraud department. They were able to tell me where the money was sent to a bank account from when I was a minor that I shared with my mom. When I called that bank, they confirmed there was activity on the account and the statements show the loan coming in and almost all of the money being transferred into what looks like my mom's account at the same bank. I haven't used that bank in more than a decade. I called my mom and asked her about it and she, after a long pause, said that's how they bought the boat.

They made one payment on the account and realized they probably couldn't afford the monthly payment for the next five years. When I asked why they hadn't told me, she said it was because they figured I would say they were right, and that they had worked hard in their lives and wanted to enjoy retirement. It ended by them saying the boat couldn't be repossessed because it was a personal loan. My mom suggested declaring bankruptcy and I told them I was going to the police. My mom said not to do that because they wouldn't take it seriously. When I told her I was doing it anyway, she hinted that she might have to call DCFS on me. My two-year-old burned themselves on a hot pen earlier this year.

Simple ER visit and was told accidents happen. He's fine, regarding an unsafe home. I think I'm still going to the police because declaring bankruptcy would make it impossible to buy a house. I just needed to vent and looking for any advice. Update 1, I filed my police report the same day as my first post. The officer and I talked for probably 20 minutes and I printed out a statement from the bank. I spoke with a detective a couple days later for another 20 minutes. Fast forward about two and a half weeks and my dad called saying my mom had been arrested.

He said an officer and a detective showed up at their house asking to speak with her. As she went on to the porch, they grabbed her and arrested her. The detective, same one I talked to, explained they had a warrant. My mom has never been in trouble with the law in her life and she got arrested on a felony. They tried talking to her and she immediately requested a lawyer. They stopped asking questions but didn't let her see a lawyer right away. My dad was furious but the detective told him to have a lawyer go down to the county jail in the morning before she went to the judge. The next morning, apparently she and the lawyer talked and she was released in the afternoon with a new court date.

About a week later, I get a call from DCFS requesting to meet with me about my son. I had nothing to hide, so I agreed. We spoke for about half an hour at my apartment and I explained the situation. She seemed understanding and told me there are no obvious issues. She just had to follow up on a report. I will say if I'm ever in trouble, I'm hiring her lawyer. The case was dismissed at her next court date in late September. The detective called me the next day and

and explained the state attorney believed that they wouldn't be able to prove beyond a reasonable doubt she intentionally stole my identity. He said he figured it was a BS reason because he had documents from the bank and loan company. He said the state attorney drops a lot of cases, even open and shut ones, especially when it's not violent and they have a hired attorney. She never made a statement other than her attorney telling the detective she didn't do it. He also said the loan company might go after my mom in a lawsuit. What brings me back here is that a couple weeks ago the account dropped from my credit. Even better though, I got a letter from DCFS yesterday saying the allegation against me was unfounded. I'm never talking to my piece of trash mom again. Thank you everyone who gave me

advice and hope in my first post. It just sucks that she is probably going to end up with a free boat out of it, unless the loan company sues her, which I hope they do. Update February 2nd, 10, 2025. I'm happy to say nothing else has popped up on my credit in the last three months. What I'm really happy to say is that the credit card company itself is suing my mom for almost $40,000 according to my aunt. I no longer talk to my mom but she messaged me on Facebook last week. She had the nerve to ask me to both, ask the credit card company to drop the lawsuit and, pay half of what they're asking for with the understanding that I'll be paid back at some point both of these with the veiled threat she will call DCFS again if I don't. No and no. She's seeing

the consequences of her actions. I hope you enjoy this story. Discovered my spouse's hidden panel monitoring our community's gossip. Later, she included me in it. When I questioned her, she placed proof to incriminate our neighbor and simulated a pregnancy. For context we're both in our later 30 seconds and live in a pretty typical suburban neighborhood where we all know each other. My wife has always loved trashy movies and shows about infidelities, and she eats up true crime about spouses killing their cheating partners too. She just says something about it makes her morbidly fascinated in her words. Well, a couple months back we had a scandal in our neighborhood where a married couple in the neighborhood divorced because the husband cheated. No, there wasn't

a murder or anything like that, but she became obsessed with learning every deep. from every neighbor. No matter the occasion, be it a baby shower or cookout, she would bring it up hoping there would be any new information. A month later is when I stumbled on the board in her home office. I was doing some cleaning and I found a massive bulletin board facing away, leaned up against the wall. Curiosity got the better of my and I turned it around to find a literal fucking conspiracy board of all our neighbor's pictures with lines of yarn connecting each other like the fucking Peppa S. Sylvia meme. I was totally confused. used and asked where what this was and she told me it was a hobby she had started recently where

she would track rumors or likely candidates for cheating on the board. The yarn represented who was possibly cheating with whom. She had clearly gotten all the images on Facebook or some social media and printed them out and even had a few sticky notes with details. I told her this was creepy and insane and she said maybe if I was doing it as a man, but she is just having harmless fun as a hobby and she wouldn't be crazy and try to oust anyone based on rumors. She did just likes feeling like a detective. She told me to view it like a creative art piece. I was still super weirded out but let it go, or tried. I thought about it a lot. While every now and then I admit to checking the board when cleaning, but just a couple days ago I looked to see that now I was on the

board with a yarn attached to a neighbor's wife I'm casual friends with. I asked her why she would add me if she thought I was cheating and she said that was a different yarn color for potential matches for cheating. She said if it makes me feel better she was planning on adding herself to the board soon. Well, I got pissed and kind of lost my temper about it. I told her to get rid of the board or our marriage will be in trouble. Things have been super rocky since. Sorry for the long post, I am starting to feel bad and it hit me more than usual this morning. Should I apologize to her? And before you ask, no, I don't suspect her of cheating. Probably I wish she would. I wish she was was because it would at least make more sense than this. Ada. Update 1, September 5th,

2024. Anyway, Jesus Christ. Firstly, appreciate all of the concern and NTAs. It gave me the courage to approach her and tell her that while I may have overreacted by threatening our marriage, I think it is a creepy thing to do. She apologized and said she would get rid of the board. I thought we were good. Literally two days later. Two days later. Shit hits the fan. Our happily married next door neighbor finds a woman's bra under the bed that does not belong to her. It doesn't take long for the whole neighborhood to find out.

Well, my wife is giddy, like jumping up and down for joy. She shows me the board, which she still didn't trash like she promised. And of course the husband was marked with yarn meaning he was likely to cheat. She told me the board was accurate after all and maybe she should keep her hobby around. I was definitely suspicious, so I looked at the board again later. It looked different from the last time I saw it before the latest scandal. Instead of the yarn connecting to another neighbor, the cheating husband's yarn connected to a post-it with a question mark. Firstly, it was the only question mark there and I swore it wasn't there last time I saw the board.

So either she changed it after the cheating to prove a point, or slightly. before it happened, which made me even more suspicious either way. Now I felt like I was the detective and I was going crazy. I went over to the cheating husbands to ask a few questions. The wife was staying at her parents so it was just the two of us. I asked him if he actually did it and he said no, he would never. Then I asked if my wife had been over recently. He said one day while you were at work his wife asked her to water a plant they had while they were both away and told her where the key was. So yes. I immediately raised an eyebrow.

I asked if he still had the bra and he was getting nervous and told me not to get the wrong idea. I said, don't worry. He still had the bra and I looked at it. It was my wife's, but one I knew she almost never wore because it was from a lingerie I bought her one Christmas she said was uncomfortable. I told my neighbor I needed to talk to my wife and ran out, but I told him not to worry. I approached her with the bra and asked her what was going on. She played stupid, but I told her to cut the BS. I asked if she had either cheated on me with him or planted it there, either way she was in trouble.

She confessed to planting the bra and said it was to make me admit her hobby was valid or something. I flipped on her. I said this was worse than her cheating on me because instead of ruining just our marriage, she ruined our neighbors and ours. I demanded she call the wife and admit to everything, even sending pictures of the board. I even showed the Reddit post which actually helped convince her my wife had planted it rather than cheated with her husband. Well, they made up but now I have no idea what to do. I am barely speaking to my wife and it is only a matter of time before the entire neighborhood figures this out. I seriously need advice.

Update 2, November 12, 2024. It's been months since then. last update. Sorry, I've been busy. Long story short, my wife is in a mental health facility. After what had happened previously, I did not speak to my wife for a while. I tried to stay working or out of the house as often as I could. Well, a few weeks passed in time made it seem like less and less of a big deal. Finally my wife offered to take me out to a very nice dinner to make things up to me. She told me everything was behind her and while I was avoiding her she had actually started online therapy to get help and realized now what she did was wrong. I really believed her

and we had a great night. One thing led to another that night and, yay, L-O-L. It took about two days after that for her to get a pregnancy test and she texted me the positive result. Yeah, I know some of you already think I'm in fucking moron, but it had been a rough year and this made me really happy. I started getting very excited. We started talking about turning my home office to a baby room, looking up ways to prepare, booking appointments, planning a shower, etc., really fun but whirlwind week. Unfortunately, she told me the first ultrasound was at a time I had to be at work and she would have to go alone. Really bummed me out and I asked her to reschedule but she said it was the only availability.

Well, that next week she went and I waiting for an update or pictures or anything. Nothing. She came home and was super quiet and I flipped out and got super worried that the worst had happened. I told her I understood she was probably in a lot of pain about something but she had to tell me. She finally admitted no, it wasn't a miscarriage. But she was actually pregnant for longer than she thought, longer than the last time we did it. She actually got pregnant during the time I was avoiding her. Obviously I was so mad and upset and I couldn't understand why she.

would do this to me, but then I realized all the signs were there for so long and all the comments telling me she was probably cheating was right. But I tried to keep a clear head for at least a second because I really love my wife and I couldn't believe it. I asked her who it could have been and she actually said she didn't know. She said she hadn't done it with anyone during the time I was avoiding her. She swore it and also didn't know what this meant. I thought about it and realized if she was really pregnant for that long, her tummy should be showing and it wasn't. I decided to call the place and ask them to confirm what they said. My wife told me it would be a waste of time and she promised she heard them clearly, so I didn't do it that night. But I couldn't sleep that night

without hearing it from the doctors myself. I called the clinic she told me she went to the day before in the morning and asked them to confirm the results. They told me something worse than I expected. She had no visit. She was never there. I didn't understand that at all. Before I talked to my wife again, I did what I should have done in the first place and reverse image searched the pregnancy test image. Yeah, it was on Google from a random years old Facebook post. I was again really mad at my wife and couldn't believe she would put me through all this. I confronted her about the picture and that I called the place and there was no appointment. I told her she had a pattern of lying and this was probably the end of our relationship.

But she responded in a way I didn't expect. She burst into tears and went manic, which I did expect, but then said that she really had cheated on me and really was pregnant and that I had made this up in my head because I couldn't face what she did to me. She said she felt like the devil and Hitler and started sobbing and literally screaming at the top of her lungs. She locked herself in the bathroom and told me she was going to kill herself over what she did to me. I couldn't get the door open and freaked out. I called the cops and they broke the door down.

She was not hurt, but she was really out of it. They took her to get a mental evaluation and she told them everything there. She even started mixing in stuff about the board and how she knew everyone around her was a cheater so she had done the same because she was in an evil place. She promised them she was pregnant but she didn't know who the father was. They tested her while in custody and no pregnancy at all. They told me she was likely suffering from a form of schizophrenia and actually genuinely believe that she was saying, and likely always had to some level, but it seemed to be getting worse. They said she had a symptom called self-accusation and needed help.

While I got her in a facility last week and she is safe. They are making a little progress. I do not think she thinks she is pregnant anymore. I have visited a few times, but she is very withdrawn with me and says she feels too guilty to look me in the eye. I think there was definitely meddling at certain parts like planning evidence, but now I just feel terrible I did not get her the help she needed when all the real signs were there. I hope her medication starts to help and she can be normal again. And yeah, the neighborhood gossip is having a field day with all this. Anyway, thanks for listening.

I hope this is my last update. Thanks for all the help. Next story, I'm a nanny of a kid and he acts like a baby, sleeps with his parents. and spies on me through my window. I thought it was cultural but this behavior creeps me out. So I am from the U.S. and recently moved to Italy to Nanny. I feel this is important because so far I have not been able to tell if I'm struggling with a cultural difference here in Italy or if I actually have reason to be weirded out.

It is easy to tell that the son, Dario, is in middle school, as he is already several than me and his mom, and is maybe 30 pounds on me. When I first got here, some of the stuff that freaked me out a little I could handle and I chalked it up to being an Italy thing. This includes stuff like talking almost exclusively in a baby voice when addressing his parents, calling his parents mommy and daddy, fighting physically with his little sister over who gets to sit on mom and dad's lap multiple times throughout the day, fighting with the sister over who gets to sleep with the parents. Getting extremely upset when mom or dad leaves and whining about not getting enough kisses or time laying in bed kissing with. mom and having his parents blow on chewed food in his mouth because it's too hot.

Now I really don't want to be critical of this if it's normal here, you know? But in the U.S. I seriously can't imagine a single seventh grade boy engaging in any of these behaviors, so it's really new to me. And really it hadn't affected me, so I just let it be. The problem is though that now I'm starting to get involved and it's making me really uncomfortable. For example, our rooms have adjacent windows which allows the kids to see into my entire room at all times. To me, this is pretty inappropriate. What am I supposed to do when I need to change clothes? But I also don't want to seem like I am sexualizing children or accusing them of anything, so I just politely asked for curtains and took to changing in the bathroom. After weeks

without curtains the family finally promised me that someone was coming to put them up. Well, he only put them in the kids' room. Ever since then I find Dario peeping through the curtains at me multiple times a day. Now I'm sure he is just checking on me or curious about what I'm up to, but it makes me so uncomfortable. I didn't want to tell the family though because I'm afraid they would think I was accusing their baby of like, trying to spy on me changing so I just took matters into my own hands and hung a blanket up over my window. Another issue has been when we stay at the kids' grandparents' house. There is a room for the parents with a bed for one child, and a room for me with a bed for one child. I figured we would split up boys and girls and I would stay with the

daughter, but nighttime rolls around and Dario is crawling into the bed next to mine. I was so uncomfortable I could hardly sleep. I have talked to my friends at home about this and they all think it's really weird, because we aren't related and he's a teenager now. But this is of course an American an opinion so I can't tell for sure if we're imposing our ideas on this family. Again, if this is really a cultural thing, though, I don't know how to tell the family that where I am from. It's kind of inappropriate for a boy so old to be sleeping next to me, especially when he's been spying on me lately, without causing issues. Of course, these behaviors affect other aspects of our life as well as it is hard to get Dario to do anything because he usually claims it's too hard

to do, making a bed at 13? Too hard? Are you kidding? And I often find myself wanting to tell him to grow up. What I need help with is knowing whether he does need to grow up or if all this behavior is normal here and I am the crazy American that needs to adjust. Is this behavior normal for a 12-year-old or is it immature? I feel like the parents still really see him as a young child, and usually he acts like but for the most part it seems like he plays up the baby act because he knows it makes his parents cater to him more. If this all is abnormal, does anyone have any suggestions about how to bring this up to the family? Edit, just want to clarify that at the grandparents' house there are two beds, and they are next to each other. Dario was not in my bed but in the bed next to mine.

Comments where Op has replied, The Freaky, It's normal behavior for a spoiled 13-year-old. Of course, most adolescents would want to peek at you through the curtains. The problem is the parents, they have to stop that shit right now. Don't you have authority as a nanny to scold him? I'm Spanish, we have a very similar culture to Italy, and that shit is inappropriate. The parents are educating a horrible child that will grow up to be an asshole that thinks the world should cater to him. Oop, oh my goodness the relief I am feeling right now to know that this isn't normal. So far I have not particularly felt like I have much authority because the times I would scold him.

The parents are sitting right there, and how can I reprimand him in front of his own? own parents. I didn't include this in the post, but he is already showing major signs of being an asshole. He is always so rude, critical, and ungrateful. Every meal I make he has something to insult about it. He treats his little sister like shit even though she is a doll and often acts more mature than him. And he loves ordering me around and telling me what I'm doing wrong. It drives me up the wall. B-186, we've established this kid's behavior is weird. But WTF at the parents responding to your request for privacy slash curtains by giving them to the child? Oop, I have no clue.

They've been really weird about some stuff. Like, this is TMI, but the mom knew I was on my period because I had to ask her where to buy tampons here and we get to the house and there's no trash can in the bathroom or in my room. I asked for one multiple times and she said she would get one and never did. And when I asked last she said, well, the kids have a trash can in their. room if you need it like WTF, are you not an adult woman? Do you not understand how this works? Update, hi all. I'm back, yish how long has it been, three to four months later with an update. Long story short, I quit. Here's the long version for those interested. The curtain issue, like I said in my last post I had just hung a blanket for privacy and since then there have been no

peeping issues. I asked two more times for curtains and was reassured both. times that the curtain man would come to hang them in my room. He did come back once and hung more curtains in the kid's room, but again not in mine. Then I was told that they didn't like him and would be finding another curtain guy to hang my curtains. It's been four months, no more mention of it, I still use the blanket. The vacation issue, I have simply refused to go on vacation with them. I'm off on weekends and I've reached a point where I just refused to be home for the entire weekend and manage not to see them from Friday night until Monday morning if I can help it. I go on weekend trips, crash on couches, sneak into my room when they're eating.

Things like that just to avoid seeing anyone on my days off. The Dario issue, Dario still acts extremely immaturely. I've warmed up to him a lot and I've figured out how to cut his rudeness and such. He's become a lot more positive and kind, especially because his mom has been gone a lot and he's with me every day. I'm very upbeat and have worked really hard to get him to socialize and speak kindly. Unfortunately, he seems to have almost regressed in terms of the childish behavior. He still sits on laps, kisses a lot, and sleeps with a parent when the other is gone.

The baby talk is constant. Constant. For example, he loves to repeat back butchered syllables of words if that makes sense. Like his dad will say pa-a-mi-un-ky-a-o. pass me a spoon, and he will clap and exclaim ayo, or void de al aqua. Do you want water? And he'll go QQ. He also has started eating kind of like a baby too. Like he'll take the remaining tomato sauce that we used on pasta and use the giant spoon to drink it out of the pot and get it all over his face. And then suck on each of his fingers. But when I look at

his parents, they're looking at him like when you see a cute baby trying to use a fork and getting food on his face. But he's 13 so it's honestly sickening to watch and listen to. He won't lock the door when he goes to the bathroom or showers. Why, I started locking the door when I was like seven. And he even cried the other day when his sister sat on the foot of his bed. He doesn't like things touching his bed. And guess what? The parents got mad at the daughter, said it was her fault for baiting him, she just had to tie her shoe for a second, and declared that it's her fault Dario will be upset all night. He also hasn't made any progress with friends, and has taken to playing League of Legends so he won't leave his room or do any activities or lessons with me or the sister.

It's pretty sad, honestly. Basically the hardest part of this whole thing has been the mother. I won't even go into it here, but she's honestly clinically insane and I feel so bad for all the people in this house that have to put up with her. She's just a power-hungry, jealous, bitter woman who needs to see a professional. Basically, I went home for Christmas to be with my friends and family and realized how bad this experience was for my health. I was going out drinking almost every night to escape the house. I was sleeping horribly because I knew she was here and her presence gave me awful anxiety. I was getting yelled at every day even when I did nothing wrong. I was at home estates and the thought of going back made me absolutely miserable. So when I came back I told them I

needed to go back early for medical reasons, not totally untrue, and now I'm set to leave the last week of March. They've found a new girl. Look out for her post here sometime in the future.