Reddit Stories - Father's EXTRAMARITAL companion PROHIBITED her child from visiting my GRANDPARENTS due to their

Episode Date: November 21, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #familydrama #moraldilemma #parentingadvice #boundariesSummary: Father's extramarital companion prohibited her child from visiting my grandparents due to their past conflicts. I am torn between respecting the companion's wishes and maintaining my relationship with my grandparents.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, familydrama, moraldilemma, parentingadvice, boundaries, extramarital, companion, prohibited, grandparents, conflicts, respect, wishes, relationship, torn, maintainBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Father's extramarital companion prohibited her child from visiting my grandparents due to their refusal to approve of her, and subsequently voiced her discontent during the evening meal about her offspring receiving unfavorable treatment. The family. So my, 20F, dad is with his affair partner, Lara. He and Lara have a kid, Lucy, 13F. Lucy was conceived after my dad and Lara were already together a while.

her birth wasn't the reason my parents split in case anyone is wondering. But obviously my dad's family knew about the affair once my parents split, and they banned Lara from ever attending family events. To this day the only people on that side of the family that have met her are me and my one cousin who came to stay with me at my dad's for a few days one time. My grandparents told Dad they'd happily be active in Lucy's life, but it would have to be Dad that facilitated the relationship, meaning he'd have to bring her to see them alone.

Laura said no. I guess she thought eventually she'd force herself into the family through Lucy, but all it did was mean no one ever met Lucy. My dad would take me to my grandparents or aunt's place without Lara and Lucy, and that was just how it went. Well, it recently came up that my grandparents were giving me money towards buying an apartment when I graduate, which set Lara off. She's always been bitter that my grandparents financed my schooling, but my dad paid for university.

She's was passive-aggressively grumbling at the dinner table that this is why she felt we could have asked them to pay for my university and that it would be nice if Lucy got to have grandparents but some people are petty and cruel. I looked at my dad like, are we really playing that game? But he didn't say anything. Then Lara turns to Lucy and goes, you should know none of this is your fault. Life isn't fair and you got the short end of the stick with certain family members. So I just said, yeah, the short end of the stick family member is you, Laura. Lucy could have had the same relationship with my grandparents that I do, but you were so selfish that you screwed your own kid out of that.

Laura argued that no one who hated her could have a relationship with her daughter, so I was like, well, what are you mad about then? That your principals ended up sabotaging your kid? Maybe that's on you. At this point my dad was giving me a death stare, so I just went back to my food. Laura sent me a text later that night about how much she didn't appreciate me saying that in front of her child and that it was her prerogative how she managed that relationship. She also said my dad's family are cruel and vindictive.

I didn't reply and honestly the only reason I don't have her blocked is in case my dad is taken ill suddenly. But now my dad is saying it's caused issues at home because Lucy is finally grasping that Lara is the one who wouldn't allow her to have a relationship with dad's side and is now apparently pretty mad about it. He's saying the way I went at Lara was inappropriate in front of a child and that Lucy shouldn't have heard all that, but I think she only heard it because her mother was reeking reality. I didn't mean to cause an issue between Lucy and Lara, but honestly I do feel like Lara was asking for it by acting like an idiot in front of someone who knew the whole story. Edit, just to clarify one. No, my dad's family didn't immediately forgive him.

for a long time they only invited him to things if he brought me during his custody time but time heals most things they all still think he's a prick but honestly i'm sure they thought that before no they haven't totally cut him out because we're just not that kind of family but laura was never family to start with so it's way easier to never make her acquaintance than to cut out your blood relative that you've known for 40 years i think that's fairly obvious two i am not mad that Lara set the boundary she did, and I'm not mad my parents got divorced. I got mad that Lara set a totally fair boundary that my dad went along with, not saying he's blameless, he's just not the one actively complaining, and then tried to pretend that the consequences

of said boundary shouldn't have happened. If you don't want your kid around people who don't like you, understandable, why are you whining that they're not around for your kid? Update, I'm not sure anyone wanted an update, but I like to read post-up dates so thought I'd drop one. First thing that happened, Lara would not stop texting me. Not like constantly, but once or twice a day about her feelings or demanding a response slash conversation. This middle-aged woman having a crash-out via WhatsApp was not on my bingo card but eventually I just had to tell her I don't want to block her because I do want to be there for my dad in an emergency but I was going to if she didn't stop bothering me. More crash-out material. I called my dad and told him to get his

household under control because this was getting crazy. I wasn't going to apologize to her and in my whole life I've never had as much contact with this woman as I had in the past week and I wouldn't allow it to continue. My dad was kind of getting that it was an actual issue now and I pushed him a bit and the damn broke. So the wider context I was not aware of is that Lucy is only now putting the pieces together of how Dad and Lara got together. She vaguely knew about the affair but I guess she's finally getting what that means now that she's older and how much damage it did, and she's been asking a lot of hard questions about it and has been really down about it. That's probably why Lara was so triggered by the mention of my grandparents and in a rush to put

her spin on it. But since the dinner Lucy has really been raking Lara over the coals for it apparently, because she knows my dad would have let her see the extended family were it not for Lara. My dad also shared that Lara basically feels like she spent a large chunk of her life being punished for the affair and it's weighing on her because of how hard Lucy is taking it. Side note, a lot of people were rightly roasting my dad for the affair, but if the above should prove anything, it's how much he is definition of a cockroach. The way this man manages to get away with diabolical behavior relatively unscathed is shocking. The second thing that my dad said, and uncharacteristically admitted was a fuck up,

was telling Lara that probably part of the reason no one ever eased up on meeting her was because they all knew I can't stand her. And I hold my hands up because I did a lot to bad-mouthing Lara back in the day to my grandparents and aunts because, well, I don't like her and when you're a teenager you think that needs to be everyone's problem. I don't think this is as big a reason they still won't meet her as my dad probably made it seem, but he did admit he threw me under the bus for it ages ago and Lara has never forgotten she thinks me poisoning the well is the whole problem.

So that's probably got a lot to do with her complaining at me specifically. my dad did acknowledge that it was a mistake to tell her what was said and while I wouldn't go around talking bad about Laura now, I don't feel bad about sharing my feelings with my family at the time. I did ask my dad if Lucy was going to be allowed contact with the grandparents but Lara is still saying no, but he said she's close to cracking just because of how much of a hard time Lucy is giving her, so he's going to wait it out. In the meantime, I haven't heard from Lara in a couple of days now which is what I mainly wanted from the situation. I'd quote else to put in this update, if anyone had any lingering questions feel free to ask, but if not, thanks for the

advice. Comments where OP has replied, comment one, sounds like stepmom fucked around and found out. Honestly, don't bother anymore. It's not going to solve anything, just give her more ammunition. But if she continues bothering you, let Laura know that she's just feeling the consequences of her actions, and if she has an issue, provide her a box of tissue and say scram not going to miss you. Boop. Unfortunately, if she keeps bothering me I'm going to have to block her which just feels like such a bad idea in case something ever happened to me, Dad. But hopefully she has realized I have no interest in being involved now.

Why is OOP keeping her father and Lara and her life? OOP, Lara is not in my life. Prior to the dinner in the original post, I hadn't seen her in a year and a half. and I never speak to her if I can help it. My dad is in my life because despite his immeasurable selfishness, he's not all bad. He's tried his best to be a good dad and there's a lot of things I love and appreciate about him. He's not winning any parenting awards but he has always shown up for me, practically and emotionally, and I consider him a net positive addition to my life. Does Lucy own a phone? Can OOP block Lara, but keep open to Lucy?

OOP. She's 13. I'm sure she has a phone. I don't have the number though. TBH in an emergency I don't think it's appropriate for it to be a child's responsibility to inform family. But if I have to block Lara in the future I'll make you my dad adds me or one of my aunts as an emergency contact so we don't have to rely on Lara comment too. Where is your mom and all this? Is she in contact with your paternal family? Sorry, OOPI. I feel bad for Lucy but Laura is a typical cheater entitled behavior. Oh, it's everybody's fault but mine. OOP, my mom is remarried and very happy, ha.

She had some contact with my dad's family when I was younger from bringing me around, etc., but she hasn't stayed in touch since I was able to make my own plans, etc. How is OOP's relationship with Lucy? Are they close? OOP, I don't have a relationship with her honestly. Big age gap, plus I was rarely at my dad's. can't stand her mother, etc. I don't live locally to them either.

But even if I did have a relationship with her, I wouldn't sneak a meeting with my grandparents. I don't think that's appropriate at all. Laura is still the parent. I wouldn't go around undermining her decisions that wouldn't sit right with me, even if I don't like her. Comment three, your dad is also kind of spineless though, isn't he? He could have put his foot down and demanded Lucy have a relationship with the extended family,

but he's Lara's little bee, isn't he? OOP, he's not spineless as much as he is committed to doing whatever is best slash easiest for him. He doesn't want to spend the energy fighting with Lara over this because it doesn't benefit him. When he actually wants something, the spine shines up, let me tell you. Next story, teenage lifeguard at a city beach told me my two-year-old daughter needed to wear a top and bandis from the beach for child Pano Ruffy concerns, but when I called the city I learned they were just high school kids using the beach to party. Two weeks ago my kids, two-year-old daughter and three-year-old son, went hiking. We followed a path that went very deep into a forest

and we came across a little beach type of place. It's really small and there were maybe 10 people there. From 8 a.m. to 2 p.m. there is a lifeguard, although he labels himself as security, there since it belongs to the city's regional parks and otherwise it is unsupervised. Obviously we had just come from hiking and I didn't have the kids' swimsuits, so when they asked me if they could go into the water, I said that I'd see. When we got closer and I saw that it didn't go deeper than my two-year-old stomach for a good six meters, I told myself I'd pull up my pants and go two to three meters in and watch the kids from there. So I agreed to let them in and told them to remove their shirts and

pants, to only keep their undies and to jump in, which they gladly did. They were playing in the water for about three minutes when the lifeguard comes by and asks me if my daughter has a top. I told him quickly that this wasn't planned, that her swimsuit does have a top but that I didn't have it with me. He replied something about it not being a nudist or topless beach and that she needed a top, so that maybe I could put her shirt on. I wasn't entirely sure that he was kidding or not. I mean, he was really young looking, 16 to 18. And he was dressed with baggy shorts and a long t-shirt, definitely not ready to jump in the water if someone drowns, and I don't know. I thought it might have been a joke.

So I asked him, really? He said, yes, really. So I got worked up and told him what does my daughter's chest have that my son doesn't. So he said, well, ah, you know, women have breasts. To which I replied, yes, women do, once they reach puberty, right now she's just a little girl with N-Pulse, everyone has N-Pulse, boy or girl. He looked at me and just said, okay, she cannot stay in the beach like that. At that point I was really pissed, probably to the point where I couldn't even watch them properly in the water, so I told them that we're going to get going. After a bit of but Mommy I want to play we got dressed and going. I didn't go back for a while since there is also another beach nearby, but further and much busier. But then we went hiking

yesterday and the kids asked if we could stop by the beach. I mean, this time around I decided to plan ahead and to bring their swimwear, both have shorts and a t-shirt surf style, as well as mine. We got there, the kids had their swimwear on already and they just took off their shoes and socks and jumped into the beach. I was taking off my dress when the same lifeguard came by. He said that he had spoken to his manager and that we weren't allowed on the beach, that they take child pianography very seriously. Again, I thought he was kidding. Like, seriously, what the hell? So I told him you better be kidding. And he says, please don't make me call for backup. Now, there were like five people at the beach, they were all staring and even the kids weren't even

in the water and just wondering why Mommy was getting upset. My three-year-old even asked Mommy, do we have to go again? And it just made me feel really upset, and I asked him, in a calming voice. can I please have the number of your manager and his name? He said he didn't have it on him and I told him that I'd go ahead and wait while he called him. So I got undressed and went into the water to watch the kids. What he ended up doing was to call the other security people, three who were also 16 to 18 looking obviously summer jobs, and they told me that I had to leave or that they would have to escort me out of the park.

My kiddos didn't need that type of stress, I didn't want to argue, so I politely asked for the manager's number again, and one of the guys said I am the manager, and I just asked you to leave. So we got dressed and we left. Today, 24 hours later, I am definitely upset. We are in July, it's nice outside, that beach is at 25 minutes from outhouse. It's not busy and yet, I cannot go there for really stupid reasons. I feel like I cannot reason with them and accept writing to the newspaper or some type of media.

I have no other idea what to do. My husband says to just go there after 2 p.m. And we have gone as a family later at night where no one is around, but I think it's completely unfair that we just can't go whenever we please. Has anyone been in this situation that could offer any advice? Should I just let it go and go to the other beach that is 60 minutes away or try to reason with someone? I obviously don't think I've done anything wrong that got me and the kids banned.

I just feel like I pissed off the lifeguard and that he's just getting back at me. comments where Op has replied, comment one, I'd call the beach and ask to speak to the manager, and if you get the 16-year-old kid, move up the chain. I'm sure that an 18-year-old is not in charge of the beach. Boop, that's what I think too. I mean at a certain point there has to be someone else? It's a beach that is inside of a national park. If I look on their website there is no contact information, so. Are they hired by the city? I've been going there for a long time now and never ever came across lifeguards and security but I've also never had found that beach. Comment 2. Start by calling the National Park Information Line and ask to be put in touch

with whoever's responsible for their lifeguards or beaches. Edit 1. Kids are napping and I decided to contact the city's council since I really can't find the number of the park's direction. I'm on hold. Edit 2. Okay, I called. I got transferred to this sweet lady who took my call very seriously and who was super professional about it. She was in total disbelieve and just couldn't believe that they would have asked a mom and her two kids to leave because of that. She asked me over and over if I had any alcohol with me, if my daughter was 20, not two, and if I was topless myself. She also kept apologizing and said, I'm so sorry, this is just crazy, I don't see why it wouldn't be allowed and I don't see why you'd lie. She put me on hold for a good

10 minutes and when she came back she apologized for what had happened. She says that if everything did indeed happen like I say it did, they obviously want to question the security guards about it. That there was absolutely no reason for me to leave. She said that the security guards are actually volunteers who are required by school to volunteer and that they don't actually have any power of asking people to leave or to dress up. So that if I wanted to I could just go back and give them their number, the city's number, or to contact the local police and ask them to send an officer over non-urgently and not to be bothered by them. She gave me the case number two in case I needed and she promised that she'd call me back

to update me after they get a hold of the lifeguards and tell me what was going to happen. She ended the conversation by saying that she was a grandmother of a four-year-old who goes to Beach Topless and never thought of it as offensive. You guys are great, by the way. However, I do wish to say that I don't plan on hurting, harming, fighting, yelling, and doing any other type of damage to anyone, especially not teenagers. I also don't really plan on suing them or harass them. So while your advice is really appreciated, those are things I just will not do. Update, the lady called back about an hour ago, we actually spoke for a while. She started by saying

how the whole team who worked with her got really upset and concerned about the whole story. She said that there are not a lot of young couples and families in the city and that they've really been trying to attract younger families and to hear something like that happening is just counterproductive. So she apologized again and said they did some quick investigation and found some quite interesting things. Happens that one of her colleagues has a teenager son who knows these guys who went to volunteer at the National Park. They go to high school together and as part of a class, they have to complete 24 hours of volunteer work. Apparently when the mother questioned her son about their volunteering at the beach, he said they don't really

volunteer there, they mostly host parties and call it volunteering. Most of 10th graders meet there to drink and smoke. Apparently he had just not told him mom because he didn't think they were harming anyone. And I mean, let's not forget it, the kid is 16, I probably wouldn't have called them out either. I would think it's just something silly. So, they sent two people who works for the town to check it out at around 1.30 p.m. yesterday and what they saw was crazy. Apparently there was about 15 teenagers there, all drinking, some smoking, some topless, who apparently said they were tanning, and lots of free dogs, which isn't allowed on the whole site. She even added that there was a guy who refused to come out of the water with his girlfriend

because they were both naked. It must have been a mess. The lady was telling me that on the phone and I was laughing and she was like, yeah, we laughed too. No shit they didn't want us there. It was their private little beach of drinking, smoking, and fucking. And like I was super curious, and almost got to be friends with the lady, I asked her, OK, what did the two people do? Well, there is only one way to get into the beach, by a little trail after a hike, and there is only one way out. By the famous little trail.

So the two town workers sat on the trail, blocking the way and called the cops. The cops came with alcohol tests, asked to see a few. ID's, called parents to come and get their kids at the park's entrance, and apparently gave them tickets for being underage and drinking. The lady also said they are in process of contacting the school to let them know how their volunteering experience worked out and how they were not dedicated to their lifeguard activities. Well, that explains a lot. They just didn't want us around. And since they have time to see us coming before we get to see them, they probably also had time to hide booze and get dressed. Although maybe it was

still too early for them when we went, 10-ish 11-ish. The lady reassured me that they were going to request these volunteers to give me an apology and that today there is already a new volunteer, that she has been told about me and the kiddos and that she cannot wait to meet us. I honestly couldn't be happier. I'm actually typing this and then getting ready to go since it's such a nice day here today. Edit, we went to the beach. The new volunteer is a really sweet teenager named Jessica. She happens to want to be a veterinarian and spent the whole time watching the kids with me and talking about pets.