Reddit Stories - FOLLOWING 9 cycles behind bars, I MISPLACED touch with the one I CHERISH

Episode Date: April 14, 2026

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #prison #loss #emotions #forgiveness  Summary: After enduring nine cycles behind bars, I lost touch with the person I cherish most. The emotional toll of incarceration strained our connection, leading to feelings of regret and longing. I reflect on the importance of maintaining relationships and the challenges faced when separated by circumstances beyond our control.  Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, prisonlife, emotionalstruggles, relationships, personalgrowth, regret, forgiveness, connection, incarceration, lifechanges, mentalhealth, healingjourney, storytelling, lifeadvice, support, resilienceBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6816713/support.This episode includes AI-generated content.

I hope you enjoy this story. Following nine cycles behind bars, I misplaced touch with the one I cherish deeply, located her on the web yet hesitated to reach out. Eventually made the decision to do so and now she's on her way. Visit me. Hi guys. When I was a university student, I fell in love with Darya, not her real name, obviously. She was the little sister of my best friend, so I considered her off limits,

but my crush on her persisted and grew. She's one of those beautiful, brilliant people who is alive and breathing to make the world a better place. How could I not be drawn to that? One day, she told me she had feelings for me. And to my relief, my best friend didn't have a problem with me dating his sister either. So for two wonderful years, Darya was my girlfriend. I should have asked her to marry me. I don't know why I didn't. I suppose I thought I had. had all the time in the world. We were young and there was no need to rush things. We lived in a country that isn't exactly democratic, and we were political activists. I ended up getting

arrested and going to prison for nine years. Please don't think I'm some kind of monster for this. I don't want to go into detail in case it makes me identifiable somehow, but we didn't hurt anyone or do anything immoral. What we did is not even illegal in the country where I currently live, and our beliefs were far from extremist. I haven't seen or spoken to Darya since the day I got arrested. My best friend died shortly after, and Darya left the country, partly due to the possibility that she be arrested too. There wasn't any way for her to contact me while I was in prison, though apparently she contacted

my dad a few times in the beginning. Things got even worse in our country while I was incarcerated, so my dad and I emigrated when I was released. We've been living in Western Europe ever since, and life is pretty okay. I live with my dad, and I have a steady, if shitty, job. Months ago, I found Darya online. She lives in a neighboring country, seven hours away by rail. She doesn't use social media too much, but from what I've seen there's no evidence of a partner or kids.

And even if she's married, I'd be content just to be her friend, as I was for the first year as we knew each other. Part of me desperately wants to reach out to her, and my dad has been encouraging me to do so, but I feel like it'd be too selfish. The circumstances of her brother's death were very traumatic for her and I'm afraid that I'm just a living reminder of all the bad things that happen to us. And if she does have a partner, would my contacting her offend him and trouble their relationship? I don't want to cause her any more sadness. Time stood still for me while I was in prison, but I know it didn't for her or anyone else. She's done so well for herself, she's built a whole life, and I don't want to derail that life just because I feel entitled to a place in it. She might not even remember me at all.

And even if she did invite me back into her life, I'd be nothing but a burden now, owing to my wrecked mental health. We've been apart twice as long as I knew her. Have I even the right to miss her as much as I do? For now I've contented myself with Googling her name every so often and seeing that she's okay. It just hurts a lot, and I don't know how to make it not hurt. I still love her with everything I have. I probably always will. Should I reach out to her, or leave her alone?

If I do contact her, what should I even say? Update 1, the short version is that I was wondering whether I should try to contact my former girlfriend after I went to prison for a long time. The consensus was that I should, and people gave very good advice on how to do that. First, I want to say thank you to everyone who offered advice or kind words. I had spent so long feeling ashamed about my situation, and expecting most people to react very negatively if they knew. I had barely discussed it with anyone before, except my dad and people whose job it is to help me, lawyers, therapists, etc., and I was very surprised to be met with

so much compassion from a bunch of complete strangers. Thank you, truly. Several people asked for an update, and that's the least I can do in return. I sent Darya a message the evening after I made my post. It was something like, I don't mean to intrude, but I wanted to say hello and thought I would give you my new contact information in case you ever felt like getting in touch. If not, that's completely fine too. I left her my mobile number and email address, wished her well, and that was that. I knew it might be a while before she responded, if she responded at all.

So I tried to put it out of my mind. Early Monday morning, my phone rang. It was an unfamiliar number from the country where Darya lives. Who else would ever be calling me from there? I panicked a little bit, but I managed to answer in time. She asked a few times if it was really me, and I couldn't tell if she was laughing or crying. At first she called me by the very affectionate version of my name she used to. But then she quickly apologized and corrected herself, which broke my heart a little bit.

It was an awkward phone call, but not in a bad way. I was extremely nervous, and it seemed like she was too. But happy, also. Some of you mentioned that Darya would want to know that I was safe, and this was more true than I could have guessed. Because unrest in my country increased a lot during the last year I was in prison, she was afraid that they would decide to quietly kill me rather than let me go. There are documented cases of other prisoners like me having met very suspicious ends in the months before my release, so it wasn't a totally unreasonable worry. She also said she repeatedly tried to send me parcels of supplies and put money on my commissary account, but her attempts were rejected without explanation.

After my sentencing, I was not allowed to receive correspondence or to have a commissary account at all, because of the classification of my crimes, so she was forced to give up. She told me this as an apology, as if I would have been disappointed with her for not helping me more. I had no idea she had done any of that. I do know that it was not a safe thing for her to do, and I feel terrible that she put herself at risk trying to make me a little more comfortable. She didn't seem to want to talk about what happened any more than that, and so we didn't. We changed the subject to more light-hearted things.

Our jobs, the cities where we live, how my dad is adapting to a new country, etc. When she arrived at work and had to end the phone call, she asked if I wanted to continue talking through a messaging app. Obviously I said yes, and downloaded it immediately. We sent messages throughout the day, and she even interrupted her commute home to send me a picture of a restaurant modeled after one of my favorite books, just because she thought I would like it. She told me that she thought of me every time she saw it, but unfortunately the restaurant itself was not so good. I was afraid she wouldn't remember me, but she even remembers the things I like to read. She remembers a lot of little things, even stuff I forgot. We have been sending messages back and forth ever

since, and talking on the phone after I finish work at night, until she gets too sleepy. Sometimes it feels like I'm 24 and she's texting me from a few blocks away, as if the next thing she might ask is what's for dinner. Other times it seems like we're trying to will dead versions of ourselves back to life in order to avoid acknowledging what we've lost. She seems a lot more timid than she used to, more passive, which I suppose makes sense. Sometimes I worry about how much I've changed, and that maybe she won't find anything left to me that's worthy of her. But if I could express in words what it feels like to hear her laugh, I could explain that

there's also a lot that we know very well. She hasn't lost her kindness, or her warmth, or her empathy. She still cares about me, and I still care about her. I know that rebuilding a friendship after all that's happened will take lots of patience, and I have plenty to spare. I'm just happy to have the chance to get to know her again. This morning, Darya asked if I want to have a video call sometime this weekend. I agreed, but I'm ashamed to admit that as much as I want to see her, I'm very nervous.

I look so different than she would remember. My jaw is messed up, and I have the teeth of a hockey player. Fortunately, I will qualify for health care insurance soon and be able to have it fixed, I lost weight that I haven't put back on, and I see an old man in the mirror. I'm also worried that I will get very emotional when I see her, and embarrass myself that way. I don't really cry in front of people. I'm not used to it, and this doesn't seem like a good occasion to start. Aside from not wanting to appear pitiful, I don't want her to feel forced to comfort me.

If anyone has some advice on how to handle this, it would be much appreciated. Overall, this week could not have gone better, and I am extremely grateful to everyone who gave me the little push of courage I needed to send her that message. A thousand times, thank you. Edit, just to clarify, she doesn't have a husband or kids. As I said in my first post, I only considered contacting her because there was no evidence of a partner on her social media. But I understand that my first post wasn't visible for a while, so I can see why that

may not have been obvious. Sorry for the confusion. Update 2. I've had a lot of people ask for an update, so here it is. The last two months have gone by very fast. I told Darya that I was nervous about the video call, and she insisted on having it right away so that I could get it over with and stop worrying. Seeing her made everything feel real in a way it hadn't before. She still looks like herself, or even more beautiful, different only in the sense that she is fully an adult now. The place she lives is very different from our home country, with a distinct culture to which she has assimilated. That she had time to adapt and feel completely at home in this place broke the illusion that no time had passed. In hindsight, that was probably the real reason I had been

so nervous, because I could no longer occasionally forget myself and pretend that nothing had changed. The hardest part was not being able to reach through the screen and put my arms around her. Sitting there and watching someone you love cry from a distance is not easy. I barely noticed that I was crying too. She didn't seem surprised at my appearance, but she did eventually look me over and ask if the food was shit where I lived. I explained about my jaw and that I'm getting it fixed, less dental work is required than I thought, but I need a surgery. Her response was to ask for my address and order groceries to be delivered, including a lot of soft snacks that are easy. to eat, and these meal substitution drinks that are actually tasty. She sent them every

week since, even though I tell her it's not necessary. When I wanted to pay her back, she laughed at me and said she owed me a lot of food, because I had kept her from starving to death in university. I loved being able to cook for her, and I suppose it makes her just as happy to feed me now. We talk every day, and have made video calls a regular habit. It does me so much good just to see her face, and the awkwardness is mostly gone now. It's easy to talk to her. Last night, she brought her computer into the kitchen and talked to me while doing the washing up. It's amazing how mundane things like that can make me feel normal, and at home, in ways I forgot I could. I never thought I'd be that stupidly happy to see someone washing coffee cups. I'm beginning to think that the idea of home

as a physical place is a misconception. She likes to send photos, to show me where she lives, what her life is like now. She was curious about how things are the same or different here. I didn't want to admit that I don't have much of a life to share back. Going places just didn't seem worth the effort. She is, though. At first it was very small things. She would send a picture of a pastry she'd bought at a cafe, saying that she thinks her city has better pastries than mine. I would go out and get one so I could send her a photo too. Then it was beer, which city has better parks, interesting architecture, a department store, and so on. I figured out quickly that she was trying to coax me into going out more, but I played along to make her

happy. I've seen more of my city in the past month than the entire time I've lived here before. I've been to the art museum and finally joined my colleagues for a beer. Usually, I go play play for short durations at the less crowded times, but I'm still going, which is something. Darya used to be very sociable, so I thought that whatever happened, at least she wouldn't be lonely. I was wrong. There is a lot she could never tell her friends, because they can't relate. They would feel sorry for her and cease to be equals, she says. Our experiences are different, but we are more able to understand each other than other people could. And despite her own burden, she has quietly picked up half the weight from my shoulders without ever being asked to.

I am in awe of her, simply for being the kind of person who would. For women's day I sent her some orchids, and she was very happy that I remembered her favorite flower. The things I can do to make her smile are so small, and she deserves so much more than I know how to give her. But I would do anything for this woman, and I am learning. There are protests happening where she is, with riot police and tear gas. Whenever this happens, she feels nervous and has difficulty sleeping. Now, at least, I can stay on the phone with her at night so she's not alone. Aside from the anxiety, there is also a sense of nostalgia.

She talks about when that was us, making noise in the street. I'm glad she has good memories too, and doesn't have to be alone with them anymore. Finally, the reason I am updating now, she is coming to visit. We were talking last night and I mentioned that a church near me has special windows designed by an artist she loves, and I was thinking about going to see them eventually. She said it would be unfair of me to go without her, so I invited her to come with me. And then somehow it turned from vague future plans to being scheduled for next Saturday. She was going to come for the day, but I told her it was silly to travel so far to stay for such a

short time and suggested she stayed the entire weekend. So she will be here from Friday until Sunday. I haven't really had time to be nervous yet, but I'm sure I will. Thank you again to everyone who has given advice or encouragement. It is very much appreciated. Next story. Found out boyfriend was cheating so I prepared a special birthday surprise. Instead of photos, I projected all his texts with his girlfriend to everyone at his party. Hello everyone. I, 26F have been dating my boyfriend Matt, 28M, for two years. Everything was fine until a few weeks ago when I noticed he'd become super secretive with his phone. Before, he used to leave it out on the table, but recently he's been taking it everywhere,

like even to the bathroom, which seemed odd. One night, while we were watching a movie, his phone lit up and I saw a text from Kelly, a name I'd never heard him mention. It wasn't like a hey, how's it going? Message, it was a hard emoji followed by Can't Wait for Tomorrow Night. My stomach dropped, but I kept my cool and didn't confront him. Instead, I decided to investigate. I didn't have his phone password, but I remembered that Matt had synced his texts to his laptop, which he kept in his office. When he went to bed, I snuck in and opened. the laptop. Sure enough, there was a whole conversation with Kelly. Turns out, they've been going out for a couple of months, and she had no idea he had a girlfriend. He was stringing her

along, telling her he was single and even planning a weekend getaway with her soon. I felt disgusted and hurt, but instead of confronting him immediately, I decided to take a different approach. Matt's birthday was coming up, and he'd invited a bunch of his friends to celebrate. They're All super tight, and I've become close to a few of them over the years. I couldn't believe Matt would do this to me, so I figured the best revenge would be exposing him to everyone. I didn't want to just air things out in the heat of the moment, so I waited until the party. After we'd all had a few drinks, I gathered everyone for a birthday toast.

I pulled up my phone and projected it to the TV in his living room. Everyone thought I was about to share a cute photo montage or something. Nope. Instead, I started scrolling through the messages between Matt and Kelly, reading them out loud. The room went dead silent. Matt turned pale, then furious, but I kept going. I finished by saying, and that's why this piece of trash isn't worth anyone's time, including mine. Happy birthday, Matt. His friends were in shock. Some of the girls immediately came over and hugged me, while the guys were stunned. Matt, on the other hand, stormed out, furious that I ruined his night. Now, here's the thing, I feel kind of guilty. Some of his friends have told me I was savage and should have

confronted him privately, while others said he deserved it for cheating. But part of me wonders if I went too far. So, eighth? Edit. I did tell Kelly she doesn't care and she is still with him. If you are wondering what she fully said about it, check the update. I do try and read all the comments they are hilarious. Thank you all for cheering me up, update. October 21st, 2024. Hey, guys. Wow, I didn't expect this to blow up like it did.

First off, thank you to everyone who commented, messaged, and offered support. I wanted to give you all an update on how things have been since the birthday toast incident. So, after Matt stormed out of the party, I left two and stayed at a friend's place for the night. The next day, I was flooded with messages, some from Matt, most from his friends. A lot of people were supportive, but a few told me I was petty for airing everything out in front of everyone. Matt, predictably, was furious and claimed I humiliated him for no reason. He even tried to flip it on me, saying I invaded his privacy by reading his texts, which,

Sure, I did, but I mean, cheating's a little worse, don't you think? Anyway, I blocked him after a couple of his angry messages, and honestly, I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders. It wasn't just about exposing him, it was about reclaiming some of the power I felt like I'd lost during the time he was sneaking around. As for his friends, most of them have cut him off completely. One of the girls in our group even texted me saying she had a similar situation with an ex, but never had the guts to confront him, let alone in front of everyone.

Apparently, this wasn't Matt's first time being shady, and a few of his friends had suspected he wasn't all that loyal in past relationships but never had proof. Looks like I just confirmed their suspicions in the most dramatic way possible. Kelly, the girl he was cheating with, I reached out to he and she told me she still loved him and told me to completely cut things off with him so they can be together. She said, obviously, I wasn't enough for him, which hurt but eke they deserve each other.

It's been hard, but I feel like I did the right thing. Sometimes you just have to burn bridges with people who don't deserve to be in your life, and Matt definitely falls into that category. Do I feel guilty? A little, but not enough to regret what I did. Cheating is never okay, and I wasn't going to let him get away with it. Plus, exposing him in front of his friends was probably the only way to really make it hit home for him that actions have consequences. So, in case anyone's wondering, no, I'm not getting back with Matt.

I did get a STD check waiting for results for people that were worried. Thanks again to everyone who shared their thoughts and gave me the courage to keep my head held high through all of this. This week has been quite hard. Just a quick update, he has already ended things with her. He reached out to me earlier and expressed his regrets about the situation. He said, said that he's really sorry and wants to reconcile and get back together with me. It is disgusting. Additional information from OOP. The birthday thing happened last weekend. The rest happened this week as said in the last paragraph.