Reddit Stories - FORMER PARTNER left his CHILD in my care and ran away after we

Episode Date: November 26, 2025

#redditstories #askreddit #aita #relationships #parenting #drama #family #betrayalSummary: FORMER PARTNER left his CHILD in my care and ran away after we had a disagreement. I was left to handle the situation alone, questioning his actions and my responsibilities.Tags: redditstories, askreddit, reddit, aita, tifu, relationships, parenting, drama, family, betrayal, formerpartner, child, disagreement, responsibility, situation, actions, alone, questioningBecome a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/reddit-stories--6237355/support.

I hope you enjoy this story. Former partner left his child in my care and ran away after we agreed to marry, so when he returned two years later pleading to take her back, I refused. Already put her in foster care. Two years ago, my ex-fiance, Scott, 30M, abandoned his specially able daughter with me, 29F, and eloped with his ex-girlfriend Ellen just a week after we got engaged. By then, we had been together for three years and had been living together. for six months. He told me that he was leaving for a work assignment and asked me to babysit his

daughter for just a couple of days and I was fine with that because if we were going to get married, I would have to learn to be on my own with her anyway. She was not much trouble anyway, and I really liked her, so I agreed. But then, three days passed, and I didn't hear from him. In the beginning, I had assumed that he must have been busy with work, but then almost a week passed, and I still didn't hear from him and that's when I started panicking. I tried to call his family but nobody answered, and neither did his friends. Everyone had just blocked me, and he had also deactivated all his social media accounts and blocked me everywhere. So I tried to contact his workplace, and they told me that he had quit

his job a month ago and they hadn't heard from him since then. That's when I started to think that he might not be coming back, but I still had his daughter with him, so I was holding out hope that he might find his way back and we might be able to fix everything. But then, a couple of days later, I turned the house upside down to look for anything he might have left, like a clue or something to where he might be, and that's when I found a note under his side of the bed, that I hadn't checked before. It had been stuck on the bottom of the mattress, so I hadn't been able to see it, but it was basically a letter to me, telling me that our relationship had been a mistake and that he had been cheating on me with Ellen on and off for the past three

years. The only reason he had even proposed was because he thought that this would finally get him to stop seeing Ellen, but she ended up proposing to him a couple of days later after she found out and they decided to get away from this place and start again somewhere new, and requested me not to try and find him. He said he was really sorry about whatever had happened, but he had to leave his daughter behind because she was a useless load, a total burden on them, and they couldn't deal with this anymore. So I could adopt her, or I could do whatever I thought was appropriate, but they were done with this, and they were now going to live the lives that they had wanted to all along. And while that letter shattered me, I didn't even have time to sit around and

cry about it because, well, I had to deal with the situation at hand urgently. I contacted CPS about his daughter because clearly, she had been abandoned and I didn't know what else to do. I couldn't adopt her by myself. I was not ready to be a mother on my own. If I had had Scott by my side, it would have been a different story altogether, but without him, I wasn't ready to do this, and on top of that, the way I had been abandoned with her, that just made everything much worse. I loved the kid, but I knew I couldn't keep her with me given the circumstances I was in. After contacting CPS, her grandparents were forced to take her in, because they could ignore me, but they couldn't ignore them. However, they also made

it very clear that they were not ready to take up this responsibility. So eventually, her maternal grandparents took her in and she has been staying with them ever since. And since she was safe and sound afterward, a couple of attempts were made to track down the parents for a few months, but then, since this was really not that important of a case, they gave up. Clearly, Scott and Ellen did not want to be found and even if they were found, they would probably not want anything to do with their daughter. That had already been made clear by the note that they had left. About a year after they left, their parental rights were terminated by the court, and Ellen's parents were declared her legal guardians. I have still kept in touch with Ellen's parents and I know that

the child is in good hands, and that works for me. Naturally, even apart from that, it had been very difficult for me to deal with the situation emotionally after Scott abandoned me, but I had to get through it all somehow. It's been two years now, and I'm pretty much over it, but I have serious trust issues with everyone anyway, I'm still staying in the house that I used to live in two years back, and last week, Scott and Ellen had the audacity to show up at my doorstep. I ended up opening the door to talk to them because I really wanted to know what they had to say to me after two whole years. They started off by apologizing to me, they were crying, they told me that they had messed up and they were really sorry about everything but now, they had realized that

they were ready to be parents but they had done something very heinous. So they wanted to take their daughter back and make it up to me, they were ready to write me a check of whatever amount I quoted and all I had to do was just help them out. I don't know what got into me, but the fact that they were actually deluded enough to believe that they could just write me a check and everything would be forgiven. It rubbed me the wrong way. So I told them that they were too late. I had already given up their child to foster care two years back, and I had no idea how she was doing. And if they were here to ask about their daughter, they were knocking on the wrong door because as far as I was concerned, they didn't have a daughter anymore. Then I shut the door,

I left them sobbing and begging me to talk to them on the doorstep and I informed Ellen's parents about their return after they had left. Later on, I spoke to my parents as well and I explained what had happened. But they told me that what I had done was twisted. My parents believed that there was no reason for me to make up a lie like that, in spite of what they had done, and they think that I should tell them the truth

and decide what they want to do. But I don't agree with them, and we kind of got into a verbal spat about it because they, of all people, know what I had been through and yet, they think that I shouldn't even have done this much. I think that they are being unreasonable, and they think that I'm being cruel. And I don't agree, I definitely am being cruel, but I also think that they deserve it, which is where we differ. So I'd offer lying and telling my ex-fiancee and his partner that I gave up their child to foster care?

Edit. Okay, so I realized that in my hurry, I forgot to mention a lot of things about Scott, Ellen, and their daughter. I'll try to keep it short, Scott and Ellen met when they were in college, fell in love and she got. got pregnant at 21. They were in their last year and he proposed to her. They were supposed to get married, but Ellen's parents were not on board with that. She had to fight a lot to even keep the pregnancy, but even then, they were not okay with her marrying Scott, since neither was he very serious about his education, nor did he seem to have any interest in working in the future. Scott himself had confided in me that it was all true, he was more interested in being a musician

back then, but he wasn't that talented and was definitely not cut out for that rock star kind of lifestyle. They stayed together until their daughter turned one, but then, Ellen started getting very upset with him because he was just jumping from one job to another, and there was no stability in his life, and at the rate he was going, there was no way her parents were going to approve of him at any point. So she dumped him, and two years later, he met me. We started dating, then we got engaged, and he pretty much forgot about Ellen and they were only in touch with regards to their daughter, so I never had any reason to feel insecure. He never even spoke about her much, so I thought that he was over her completely. But I guess I was wrong, which is why all of

that happened. And about their daughter's age, she's turning eight this year and when they abandoned her, she was six years old, obviously. But she has known me since she was three, and we did have a soft corner for each other, which is why I have kept in touch with her because after having spent three years of knowing her, I couldn't just cut her out of my life completely for something that her parents had done. That's why I chose to stay in touch. Update 1, hi, so it has been a couple of days since I posted and my parents and I are still not speaking to each other. They believe that what I did was extremely cruel, and it was apparently uncalled for. But I think what they did to me and their daughter two years ago was a lot worse. So I think this is perfect for them. If my parents cannot

bring themselves to see my point. If they still think that I'm wrong, then they can continue to think that way. It hardly matters to me, I'm going to do what I want to, and either way, I've done it already, so it makes no difference. Anyway, Ellen's parents called me earlier today, and they told me that Ellen had reached out to them to ask for forgiveness and to ask if there was any way they could help track down their daughter. They put it in an email, and her parents have not responded to it yet. They don't intend on responding to it either. They are not entitled to any information on their daughter because now, legally, she has been adopted by Ellen's parents and they are not bound to tell anyone how or where she is, least of all the people who had abandoned her. Honestly, I just can't even

imagine the audacity it would require to show up after two years, asking after their daughter and saying that they are ready to be parents now, so we should help them out. Ellen's parents and I remember very well how difficult it was for us to get that six-year-old child to understand that her parents were probably not going to be coming back. They have no idea how emotionally draining it was for the three of us to try and console her when she would cry for her parents, and we had no idea how to explain anything to her. Of course, we thought that we would tell her when she was older, but given her condition, things are different with her.

Things are more complicated, and never did they once look back to check on their own daughter. She was just six years old, for God's sake, I can't imagine how they brought themselves to just leave her and go away. And now, all of a sudden, just because they feel conscientious and it's convenient for them, they are back and want their daughter back in their lives. Some guts it must require, I have to say that. Anyway, I'm just glad that Ellen's parents had never liked Scott, and I think they had the right idea about him.

The two of them really do deserve each other, and anybody who thinks that I should show them any sort of kindness, they are seriously fooling themselves. They should actually be glad that law enforcement did not pursue their case since they were not much of a priority, because if they had been found, would have personally sued them. Sadly, I did not get the chance to do that back then, but now, I'm not going to leave any stone unturn to make sure that they pay for what they did, and I'm not even talking about paying financially, I'm talking about making them pay emotionally. Anyway, I highly doubt that any amount of money is going to make up for what they did, especially to me. At least their daughter is young, with time, she will be able

to move on and maybe forget about it. I'm not saying it's going to be easy for her, but at least she has her whole life ahead of her but in my head, I had really planned a future with Scott, and after him, I was not able to trust any guy at all. For the past year, I've been thinking about putting myself back out there, but I just can't bring myself to do it. I have even been out on a couple of dates, but it always fizzles out. And my parents know how difficult it has been for me to deal with all of this, to deal with him abandoning me like that, and even then, they think it was appropriate for them to say that I was being cruel to him. It just doesn't make any sense to me, and I'm really hurt and angry that they are choosing not to speak to me over

something like this. I'm literally their only child, and I can't believe that this is how they're choosing to treat me. It's just hugely disappointing, but there's not much that I can do about it and I'm definitely not going to reach out to them first. If they want to talk to me, they're going to have to come to me. Until then, I'm just grateful that I have this platform to speak about my problems anonymously because so far, I haven't even been able to tell my friends about any of this. It just feels too personal. And on top of that, after the reaction that I received from my parents, I don't know what to expect from anyone. I definitely don't need any extra drama right now, so I guess I'm just going to keep it to myself for now.

Update 2, so it has been a couple of days since my last update and since Ellen's parents did not reply to her email, she decided to show up at their house uninvited. It was just her, Scott did not accompany her, and after her visit, they called me up to inform me what had happened. Apparently, when Ellen showed up, they refused to let her in and said that they wanted nothing to do with her. And if she was here to ask about her daughter, then she was just going to be disappointed because she was not with them. Thankfully, at that point of time, she was taking a nap anyway, so there was no chance of her being found out in the house anyway. But Ellen started begging and crying, and said that she knew that her daughter

had to be here, that we had all been lying to her, and she knew that she had messed up, but as a mother, she had the right to see her daughter. She insisted that they had to let her in, and as her parents, they could not be that cruel. So they got into a fight, and Ellen started to banging on the door when they shut it. But even then, her daughter did not wake up and I'm really thankful for it because I think it would have been very traumatizing for her. After a while, her parents said that they would call the cops, and that's when she finally left. They called me to warn me about it, because now that she had somehow figured out that her daughter had to be with them, they would probably try to come to me as well and try to talk me into convincing them. But that's

obviously not happening. I don't even think that I'm going to entertain their visits, and I'm definitely going to call the cops as soon as they decide to show up here the next time. In all honesty, I'm beginning to think that it's probably Scott's parents who are responsible for this. They were not really involved in the whole adoption process, but I'm guessing they must have had some idea what was happening after CPS stopped contacting them. So it must have been their guess that Scott and Ellen's daughter is now with her parents. Because she's definitely not with me, that's for sure. And given how Scott's parents always adored him, I'm pretty sure that they had stayed in touch with him for the past two years but had refused to help find them. I think all these

people are just failures at being parents or even just good people in general. They really do deserve each other and I think they should stick to each other instead of bothering us. I don't even understand why they are being so stubborn about getting back to their daughter, they can just make another baby now. Or maybe I'm guessing that must be part of the reason why, maybe they don't feel guilty and maybe they just want to get back into their daughter's life because there must be some problem with conceiving another baby. I have heard of stories like that, and I wouldn't be surprised if that is the case because judging by how selfish and heartless their behavior had been the first time around, I really don't think that I would put this kind of thing beyond them.

Anyway, I'm not sure of it, so I can't say anything as to why they want to get back to their daughter after two years. But from the gut feeling that I've been getting for the past few days, I'm pretty sure that it's nothing to do with their conscience or whatever. In fact, I would probably go to the extent of saying that they don't even have a conscience, because if they did, they wouldn't have done something so disgusting in the first place. Anyway, this whole situation has really started messing with me. And they hardly ever brought up anything to do with Ellen or Scott, to the extent where I almost forgot that they were her parents.

They never spoke of her, but nowadays, I feel like I'm being suffocated because I've started to think about them every day once again. And it feels like all the healing, all the self-care of the past two years has started being undone or something because I feel like I'm going back to that state of mind in the first few days after I was left behind by Scott. And that just can't happen again,

because it was one of the darkest phases of my life, and I really don't want to go back there. At least back, then, I had my parents to support me, but this time, they're not even speaking to me. Yeah, it's been a while, and they are still not speaking to me and I don't know what it's going to take for them to acknowledge the fact that maybe they were not exactly right.

And maybe Scott and Ellen deserve the kind of treatment that they are receiving right now. I don't understand why they are being so stubborn about this whole thing, but even I have decided that enough time has passed and now, an apology is just not going to cut it. I don't know what exactly I want them to do, but just coming back to me and saying that they are sorry is not going to be enough. They're going to have to show me that they are sorry.

and then I'm going to think about whether I want to forgive them or not because I think they have been very insensitive and I don't need any more of that crap in my life at this point. Update 3. So just as Ellen's parents had predicted, two days after she showed up at their house, Scott showed up at my place. I just don't understand why these people believe that I'm going to help them out, or that Ellen's parents are going to help them out, especially after whatever they had put us through in the past two years. But for some reason, they believe that we owe it to them to be good to them. them, even after they had been nothing but heartless and insensitive to all of us.

Of course, just as I had expected, he showed up alone this time, without Ellen. And I'm pretty sure that this is a strategy or something. They probably think that showing up with each other is going to make us even more upset, so they're trying to make it seem like they really care about our feelings or something. I don't understand why they think we are such fools, but anyway, when he showed up, I instantly told him that he needed to leave or else I would immediately call the cops. He started crying immediately, saying that he knew that he had messed up, but he had learned his lesson and said that karma had finally caught up with them.

Apparently, a few months ago, Ellen had been diagnosed with cervical cancer, and they believe that this is their punishment for abandoning their daughter and treating us the way that they did. So they have come back now, to make up for everything that they had done in the past, and they are hoping that we will forgive them, so they can move on with their lives and take back their daughter. I don't know if the whole cervical cancer story is true or not, but it hardly made a difference to me. I told him through the door that this sob story of his hardly made any difference to me, and if he thought that he could get me to take pity on him by saying all these

things, then he was very wrong. Because I haven't forgotten how I felt back when he left me and I'm never going to forget that feeling for the rest of my life, thanks to the trust issues that he has given me. And neither do I feel the need to forgive him, not do I feel the need to believe him in his stories. Even if the cancer story is true, I don't care about it because regardless of whether Ellen is suffering or not, their daughter is still not a toy that they can take back whenever they want to. They might have figured out where she is, and with whom, but if he was here to convince me to talk to Ellen's parents and let them have her back, then he was seriously mistaken, because I was not going to do anything of the sort and my decision was final, and I didn't want to

hear I told him that he had 30 seconds to get off my property. I already had the phone in my hand and was about to call the cops when he told me that he was finally leaving, but he needed me to know that he was not making up anything. He was telling me that whatever he had said so far, it was the truth, and he really was sorry about everything that I had to go through, that Ellen's parents had to go through and he confirmed what I already knew, that his parents had told him that in all probability, it was probably Ellen's parents who had ended up adopting their daughter.

And also, Ellen had already visited them, but had no luck in seeing their daughter even once. So they had believed that at least I would have some sympathy for them, knowing their condition, and arrange for at least one meeting between parents and daughter, by speaking to Ellen's parents because it seems like they have taken a liking to me or something. Now, though, clearly, it was evident that I had no interest in helping them out, so he was going to leave because he had no interest in getting caught up with the cops, especially after whatever had happened in the past.

But he wanted me to know that whatever he had told me about having cervical cancer, it was all true, and they had really believed that coming back here, they would be able to make amends with all of us, but clearly, we are not open to it. He told me that Ellen hadn't brought up anything about it when she had tried to visit her parents because she did not want them to worry too much, but now, he didn't think that they would worry anyway, so he told me to tell them about it, and that was the least that he could ask of me. This was one last favor that I could do for them, but if I didn't even want to do that, that was fine with him as well and within the next week, they would be flying back home and would never bother us again for the rest

of their lives. Then, he left, and I didn't even have to call the cops and I don't know what to do with myself either now, to be frank. I just felt like I had to get this all off my chest, and now, I guess I'll have to make a decision about whether I should talk to Ellen's parents about what I was told or not. Eventually, I guess I'll have to do that anyway, so let's just see where this goes. Update 4. So it's the end of the week. Now, if Ellen and Scott had stuck to what they had said about leaving, then they would have probably already gone back home. After my last conversation with Scott, there were no further attempts to get in touch with us, and I did speak to Ellen's parents about whatever I was told. I told

them all about the cervical cancer, and while they looked very shocked and unhappy about it, they said that they were not going to get back in touch with her. At least not right now, because their granddaughter needed them more than she did, and maybe in the future, they would think about it, but for now, it was just too fresh and raw to think about it. Besides, there was no proof of it, apart from Scott's word, and I hate it to cheapen the experience of any cancer survivor, but I really don't think that my opinion of these two is high enough to say that they would be above using something like this to make us sympathetic towards them and get back in touch with them or something. So for now, we are going back to our normal lives. With one

exception, my parents are still not speaking to me, but I guess I'm going to get used to it. Thankfully, I did speak about whatever I was going through to a bunch of my friends, and luckily, they were all on my side, all of them were very upset with my parents for reacting the way that they did, and said that I was right to cut them off. So now, I'm not going to worry about anybody else, I'm just going to focus on my own mental health and try to undo all the damage that has been done to it in the past couple of weeks.